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Yesterday, 04:36 AM | #9 |
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November 9
Daily Reflections STEPPING INTO THE SUNLIGHT But first of all we shall want sunlight; nothing much can grow in the dark. Meditation is our step out into the sun. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 10 Sometimes I think I don't have time for prayer and meditation, forgetting that I always found the time to drink. It is possible to make time for anything I want to do if I want it badly enough. When I start the routine of prayer and meditation, it's a good idea to plan to devote a small amount of time to it. I read a page from our Fellowship's books in the morning, and say "Thank You, God." when I go to bed at night. As prayer becomes a habit, I will increase the time spent on it, without even noticing the foray it makes into my busy day. If I have trouble praying, I just repeat the Lord's Prayer because it really covers everything. Then I think of what I can be grateful for and say a word of thanks. I don't need to shut myself in a closet to pray. It can be done even in a room full of people. I just remove myself mentally for an instant. As the practice of prayer continues, I will find I don't need words, for God can, and does, hear my thoughts through silence. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have learned to be less negative and more positive. I used to take a negative view of almost everything. Most people, in my estimation, were bluffing. There seemed to be very little good in the world, but lots of hypocrisy and sham. People could not be trusted. They would "take you " if they could. All church-goers were partly hypocrites. It seemed I should take everything "with a grain of salt." That was my general attitude toward life. Now I am more positive. I believe in people and in their capabilities. There is much love and truth and honesty in the world. I try not to run people down. Life now seems worthwhile and it is good to live. Am I less negative and more positive? Meditation For The Day Think of God as a Great Friend and try to realize the wonder of that friendship. When you give God not only worship, obedience, and allegiance, but also close companionship, then He can feel that He and you are working together. He can do things for you and you can do things for Him. Your prayers become more real to you when you feel that God counts on your friendship and you count on His. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may think of God as my Friend. I pray that I may feel that I am working for Him and with Him. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Telling the Worst, p. 311 Though the variations were many, my main theme was always "How godawful I am !" Just as I often exaggerated my modest attainments by pride, so I exaggerated my defects through guilt. I would race about, confessing all (and a great deal more) to whoever would listen. Believe it or not, I took this widespread exposure of my sins to be great humility on my part, and considered it a great spiritual asset and consolation! But later on I realized at depth that the great harms I had done others were not truly regretted. These episodes were merely the basis for storytelling and exhibitionism. With this realization came the beginning of a certain amount of humility. Grapevine, June 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Compliance isn't acceptance Honesty We are sometimes mystified when people come into AA program, respond to its message for months or years, and then disappear, seemingly without a trace. Later, we may be shocked to learn that they're drinking again. While we have no way of knowing the real reason, on possible explanation is that they were practicing compliance without really accepting the program. The danger of compliance is that it may simply be an outward show of working the program while leaving one's real thoughts and feelings unchanged. At the same time, we often urge people to practice what is really only a form of compliance. We tell them, for example, to "bring the body" to meetings in the belief that the heart will follow. This does little good if one's heart does not follow! The only solution is to continue the difficult but rewarding search for honesty in all things. When we examine ourselves honestly, we will recognize when we are truly accepting and when we are merely complying. I'll remember today that the real success of AA is not in the number of people who show up at meetings, but in how we truly accept the program. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple He who can take advice is sometimes superior to he who can give it. ---Karl von Knebel In recovery, we learn that we don’t know everything. We had stopped listening. Most of us had been asked by family, friends, doctors, and employers to stop drinking and using other drugs. But, we didn’t listen. If we had listened, we would’ve been in this program long ago. Addiction did something to how we listen. We heard only what we wanted to hear. Do I still hear only what I want? In recovery, we learn to listen. We listen to our groups. We listen to our sponsor. We listen as we read. The better we listen, the better our recovery. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, open my ears and eyes to this new way of life. Allow me to hear Your wisdom in the Twelve Steps. Allow me to be someone who takes advice, not just gives it. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll try to listen. Today I’ll seek the advice to others. I’ll ask my sponsor how I may better my program. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning On any journey, we must find out where we are before we can plan the first step. --Kathy Boevink Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego. We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked. We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride. I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition The Doctor's Opinion The classification of alcoholics seems most difficult, and in much detail is outside the scope of this book. There are, of course, the psychopaths who are emotionally unstable. We are all familiar with this type. They are always “going on the wagon for keeps.’’ They are over-remorseful and make many resolutions, but never a decision. p. xxx ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Student Of Life Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold. I arrived late on a Friday and managed not to drink that night. The next morning at the show, I was offered the gift that changed my life. Our Hawaiian sales rep seemed frustrated; I thought he was disappointed that he hadn't managed to write an order for a couple he had just finished working with. I went over to console him. He said, no, his mood had nothing to do with the couple; instead, he explained that just this week he had lost his girlfriend, dropped out of school, lost his apartment, and also lost his full-time job. He added, "I'm an alcoholic. I've been sober for a year and a half, except I just drank again this past week. I'm a mess about it." At that very instant, I heard one word in my head. The word was "now." I knew it meant, "Say something now!" p. 325 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Two - "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Sometimes A.A. comes harder to those who have lost or rejected faith than to those who never had any faith at all, for they think they have tried faith and found it wanting. They have tried the way of faith and the way of no faith. Since both ways have proved bitterly disappointing, they have concluded there is no place whatever for them to go. The roadblocks of indifference, fancied self-sufficiency, prejudice, and defiance often prove more solid and formidable for these people than any erected by the unconvinced agnostic or even the militant atheist. Religion says the existence of God can be proved; the agnostic says it can't be proved; and the atheist claims proof of the nonexistence of God. Obviously, the dilemma of the wanderer from faith is that of profound confusion. He thinks himself lost to the comfort of any conviction at all. He cannot attain in even a small degree the assurance of the believer, the agnostic, or the atheist. He is the bewildered one. p. 28 ************************************************** ********* Make failure your teacher, not your undertaker. We all make mistakes. The important thing is to learn from your mistakes. "When everything has to be right, something isn't." --Stanislaw Lec "Jealousy is all the fun you think they had." --Erica Jong "To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is, a dissatisfaction with self." --Joan Didion "As a moth gnaws a garment, so doeth envy consume a man." --St. John Chrysostom A person's worth is contingent upon who he is, not upon what he does, or how much he has. The worth of a person, or a thing, or an idea, is in being, not in doing, not in having. --Alice Mary Hilton *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation ACCEPTANCE "Adversity is the trial of principle. Without it a man hardly knows whether he is honest or not." -- Henry Fielding The acceptance of my disease has brought me into recovery. If I had not known and confronted the disease of addiction in my life, I would not know the joys of sobriety and serenity. Spirituality involves facing my disease. Today I believe that had I not seen my dishonesty, I could not fully appreciate honesty. If I had not recognized the lies and games in my life, I could never have appreciated the "openness" and freedom of sobriety. Owning my violence brought me to peace and tolerance. Facing my hell gave me a glimpse of paradise. The disease was not only my prison but when accepted, became the key to recovery. Spirituality, finding God in our lives, requires a "rigorous honesty" that uses the past pain to experience today's gratitude. God, it is through the acceptance of my failings that I can love the world. ************************************************** ********* "You are a God ready to forgive, gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love." Nehemiah 9:17 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Everything in life is not logical, but we can enjoy the moment anyway. Lord, help me become spontaneous to the dreams that pass by. Rise above the little things. Lord,may I overlook pettiness and jealousies and be secure in myself and my actions. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Best-Laid Plans "It is our actions that are important. We leave the results to our Higher Power." Basic Text p. 88 There's an old saying we sometimes hear in our meetings: "If you want to make God laugh, make plans." When we hear this we usually laugh, too, but there's a nervous edge to our laughter. We wonder if all of our carefully laid plans are doomed to fail. If we're planning a big event - a wedding, a return to school, or perhaps a career change - we begin to wonder if our plans are the same as our Higher Power's plans. We are capable of working ourselves into such a frenzy of worry over this question that we refuse to make any plans at all. But the simple fact is that we really don't know whether our Higher Power's plans for our lives are carved in stone or not. Most of us have opinions about fate and destiny but, whether we believe in such theories or not, we still have a responsibility to live our lives and make plans for the future. If we refuse to accept responsibility for our lives, we're still making plans - plans for a shallow, boring existence. What we make in recovery are plans, not results. We'll never know whether the marriage, the education, or the new job is going to work out until we try it. We simply exercise our best judgment, check with our sponsor, pray, use all the information at hand, and make the most reasonable plans we can. For the rest, we trust in the loving care of the God of our understanding, knowing that we've acted responsibly. Just for today: I will make plans, but I will not plan the result & I will trust in my Higher Power's loving care. pg. 327 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Love is something if you give away, you end up having more. --Malvina Reynolds The other side of giving is taking. Many of us were brought up to believe that it's not okay to take, so we diminish admiration that people give us. "Oh, this old rag, I got it at a garage sale for next to nothing." This response to a compliment can take away the joy of giving it from the person who admired the way we looked. Giving needs taking to complete it. We can keep the cycle of generosity going by taking gracefully. A world without those who take would be unbalanced. When someone gives us love, appreciation, or a gift, we can show our real pleasure with a simple thank you, and stop thinking we don't deserve it. Can I accept what's given to me today in the spirit it's offered? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves together. --Thomas Carlyle Silence does not draw attention to itself. It is the ultimate in letting go and letting be. It is the opposite of the great dramatic event, so we easily forget silence is a basic means by which we grow. We live in a "can do" society that applauds a man of action who gets a job done. Perhaps we learned to think that being alone in silence is empty time with nothing happening. In truth, some great things happen only by decisive action, but other great things happen only when we get ourselves out of the way and simply allow them to occur. It would be foolish to believe only in action and miss the benefits that come from quiet moments. When we withdraw from the hubbub of the world around us and quiet our minds, we are making room for great things to fashion themselves together. Today, I will remember the importance of silence in my growth. I will set aside some of my busyness and be still. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. On any journey, we must find out where we are before we can plan the first step. --Kathy Boevink Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego. We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked. We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride. I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth. You are reading from the book Food for Thought. Where's the Party? Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought. Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating. Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time. Thank You for fun. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Accepting Love Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate. To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. This may mask the situation for a while, but we usually get tired. Then, when we stop doing all the work, we notice there is no relationship, or we're so tired we don't care. Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized. In our best relationships, we all have temporary periods where one person participates more than the other. This is normal. But as a permanent way of participating in relationships, it leaves us feeling tired, worn out, needy, and angry.' We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find it's own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy? Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work? We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help the other person, the relationship, or ourselves by trying to force it or by doing all the work. Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want. Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I will accept the natural level my relationships reach when I do my share and allow the other person to choose what his or her share will be. I can trust my relationships to reach their own level. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share. Today I am fully alive, fully open to feel all that there is... knowing that I can handle all that comes my way. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart A Meditative Journey Go deeper into the forest. Walk among the trees, down the winding dirt path strewn with rocks and wood chips. See the salamander dart across your path. Listen to the birds chirp. Hear the rustling in the bushes. Walk down the path until you come to the quiet pond. Sit for a while and rest. When you are ready, walk to the edge of the pond. Look down into the still waters. What do you see? At first, just water. Then gradually, a reflection emerges. It is you. It is your life. Gaze peacefully into the water, into the reflection of your life. See that it has been just as it should be, a lifetime of events causing ripples of love, peace, and healing in the universe. See that it is now as it should be. The people who are gathering around you are there for a reason. The places you have visited were not without purpose. The lessons you have learned are yours forever. You are right where you need to be. Gaze into your reflection in the quiet, deep mirror of the pond until you see that, know that, feel that. Gaze long enough to see truth, peace, contentment, Divine order. Sit down and again, look around the forest. Take in its beauty, its wonder, its shimmering emerald leaves, the tiny white wildflowers cropping up everywhere, delicate surprises that bring joy. Inhale the smells, the fresh growth, the musk, the smell of cedar and pine. Inhale, breathe deeply, until the breath of life fills you with wonder. Let it flow throughout you; let it saturate every cell. Peace. Contentment. Divine order. You are safe. The forest is your friend. It tells you that all is well. Look around. See the tallest tree. See that it has weathered every storm, and millimeter by millimeter, ring by ring, continued its growth over centuries. Know that you have grown that way,too. Rise slowly when it’s time. Find your path. Feel the earth beneath your feet, supporting you, giving you strength, filling you with grounded energy. Walk down the winding path through the glimmers of sunlight until you reach the edge of the forest. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Lighten up some more On the last day of my retreat, I told the guestmaster that I didn’t think that I would be able to get back soon because I didn’t have the time. He came right back with “The problem isn’t TIME; the problem is HEAVINESS.” He turned and went downstairs returning with a little carpet. “Here take this. It is a magic carpet. If you sit on it and let go of your heaviness, you can go anywhere you want. It’s not a question of time.” I have come to know that this is true. People laugh at me when I tell them. Will you laugh too? All right. Then stay there. –Theophane the Monk, Tales of a magic Monastery Often, the problem in our lives isn’t time; it’s heaviness. We aren’t too busy. In reality, we’re too worried, obsessed, doubtful, overly concerned, and afraid. Release all that heaviness in your mind and heart. Let it sink away so you can stand free from its weight. When all that heaviness drops away, you can float through and above your ordinary life. You’ll decide how you want to live rather than letting the circumstances of the day control you. Find the heaviness in your life, the overpowering worry that ties you down, and then let it go. Are you afraid that you will be laid off from your job? You either will or you won’t, but all the worry does is stifle your creative flow. Find the heaviness, let it drop away. Then get on your magic carpet and sail through your day. God, help me lighten my load by letting go of worry, doubt, and fear. Help me learn the power of quiet confidence. Teach me to say I can. ***** Being Alone A Relationship with Self by Madisyn Taylor By allowing ourselves to be comfortable with being alone, we can become the people with whom we want to have a relationship. The most important relationship we have in our lives is with our selves. And even though we are the only ones who are present at every moment of our lives—from birth onward—this relationship can be the most difficult one to cultivate. This may be because society places such emphasis on the importance of being in a romantic partnership, even teaching us to set aside our own needs for the needs of another. Until we know ourselves, however, we cannot possibly choose the right relationship to support our mutual growth toward our highest potential. By allowing ourselves to be comfortable with being alone, we can become the people with whom we want to have a relationship. Perhaps at no other time in history has it been possible for people to survive, and even thrive, while living alone. We can now support ourselves financially, socially, and emotionally without needing a spouse for survival in any of these realms. With this freedom, we can pursue our own interests and create fulfilling partnerships with friends, business partners, creative cohorts, and neighbors. Once we’ve satisfied our needs and created our support system, a mate then becomes someone with whom we can share the bounty of all we’ve created and the beauty we’ve discovered within ourselves. As we move away from tradition and fall into more natural cycles of being in the world today, we may find that there are times where being alone nourishes us and other periods in which a partnership is best for our growth. We may need to learn to create spaces to be alone within relationships. When we can shift our expectations of our relationships with ourselves and others to opportunities for discovery, we open ourselves to forge new paths and encounter uncharted territory. Being willing to know and love ourselves, and to find what truly makes us feel deeply and strongly, gives us the advantage of being able to attract and choose the right people with whom to share ourselves, whether those relationships fall into recognizable roles or not. Choosing to enjoy being alone allows us to fully explore our most important relationship—the one with our true selves. ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day As time passes, daily communion with God is becoming as essential to me as breathing in and out. I don’t need a special place to pray, because God always hears my call. I don’t need special words with which to pray, because God already knows my thoughts and my needs. I have only to turn my attention to God, aware that his attention is always turned to me. Do I know that only good can come to me if I trust God completely? Today I Pray May my communion with God become a regular part of my life, as natural as a heartbeat. May I find, as I grow accustomed to the attitude of prayer, that it becomes less important to find a corner of a room, a bedside, a church pew, or even a special time of day, for prayer. May my thoughts turn to God automatically and often, whenever there is a lull in my day or a need for direction. Today I Will Remember Let prayer become a habit. ************************************* One More Day Faith is a living and unshakable confidence, a belief in the grace of God so assured that a man would die a thousand deaths for its sake. – Martin Luther When a crisis occurs — a death in the family or perhaps a chronic illness — many of us pass through the “Why me?” phase. We may become confused and feel we have been personally selected for bad times. Our faith may be shaken. It can take us a while to recognize that we still have abiding faith in our Higher Power. time passes and as life gains some semblance of normalcy again, we understand there are no easy answers, but our faith has carried us through a difficult time. Eventually, our belief in a Power greater than ourselves takes hold, rather firmly, until we feel an even stronger sense of faith and purpose than before. As I gain my own strengths I am more able to extend my beliefs to include my Higher Power once again. ************************************ Food For Thought Where's the Party? Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought. Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating. Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time. Thank You for fun. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ HOPE ~ Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. Jean Kerr I pray for hope today, and I am receiving hope today. Hope is something that comes more and more readily to me as I stay abstinent and continue working my program of recovery. In the past, many of my feelings of hope were centered around the next diet or the next fix for my bingeing. However, now that I am abstaining and practicing the Twelve Steps, I have been freed to hope for bigger things. There is now space in my head where the food and diet obsession used to be! One Day at a Time . . . I will abstain. One day at a time I will direct my attention to the Steps when I am in need of a solution. ~ Christine ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Though the family does not fully agree with dad's spiritual activities, they should let him have his head. Even if he displays a certain amount of neglect and irresponsibility towards the family, it is well to let him go as far as he likes in helping other alcoholics. During those first days of convalescence, this will do more to insure his sobriety than anything else. Though some of his manifestations are alarming and disagreeable, we think dad will be on a firmer foundation than the man who is placing business or professional success ahead of spiritual development. He will be less likely to drink again, and anything is preferable to that. - Pgs. 129-130 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Service to another addict/alcoholic or to our group can help calm us when the jitters get rough. Think of one other fellow recoverer who also seemed jittery at the last meeting or maybe didn't show up. You can get in touch with them today and ask if you can help. God, as I understand You, give me the right words to comfort or to encourage a fellow recoverer. Learning Today, I do not accept other people's truth as my truth. Even if what they believe seems better or more obvious, I need to give myself credit for feeling and seeing what I feel and see. Learning is meaningful to me as it relates to or is understood within the workings of my own mind. Without something in me making it relevant, learning is very disconnected. I am the learner behind the information; I am the seer behind the seen. I learn by direct experience. I learn to trust the perceptions that I gain from my own observation of life. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.' ~Albert Einstein When my problems are significant and my program isn't working, I work my sponsor's program for awhile. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The Steps are your daily bread, not cake for special occasions. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am fully alive, fully open to all there is, knowing that I can handle all that is coming my way. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcoholism is the only disease they lock you up for. Anon.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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