Today's Thought - April

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April 16

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
--Antoine de St. Exupery

A tuning fork is a small tool that is used to tune musical instruments. It is tapped softly and then set down. As it vibrates, it gives off a musical tone. When its vibrations perfectly match the vibrations of the note played on the instrument, the instrument is in tune. When the note matches the tuning fork, this can be both felt and heard.

Our hearts work like a tuning fork. When the heart feels completely in tune with a decision or thought or action in our lives, then we know it is the right one for us. We can actually feel the harmony inside our bodies.

Sometimes what we know deep in our hearts gets clouded over by doubts and questions and other people's opinions and judgments. We need to clear away such clouds and listen to our hearts, for our hearts carry the wisdom of God.

Am I in tune with my heart today?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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April 17

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.
--Doug Larson

Life is never just one thing. It is quite possible to feel optimistic and happy even when some things are not right with us. An optimistic outlook gives us energy to handle the harder things that we have to deal with. Research shows that people who have a positive attitude have a stronger immune system, are healthier, live longer, and are even more likely to recover from serious illness.

To believe in hopeful outcomes is largely a matter of choice. Many of us have experienced big disappointments and defeats in life. But having come this far, we can look back and see that somehow we had the capacity to deal with it. The Second Step guides us to believe in hopeful possibilities. We can't say that things will always turn out just the way we hope, but that we can cope with whatever happens.

Today I choose to believe that a power greater than myself can help me deal with life, and I have reason to be optimistic.

You are reading from the book:

Wisdom to Know by Anonymous

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April 18

The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water and breeds reptiles of the mind. -- William Blake

We seek the answer. Sometimes we think we have found a central truth and later learn that beneath it is another truth. Or what seemed so crucial as a guiding principle for our lives last year is still true but not as crucial. It is like trying to take a snapshot of a changing world while the camera itself is changing.

Some of us in our hunger for security grab for "absolute" truths, which are not absolute. We must continue forever to be eager learners. In stepping across a stream from one floating log to another, we must resist the temptation to become overcommitted to staying in an especially secure looking place, or we will never reach the opposite shore. Even the Twelve Steps of this program are given to us as a "suggested" program of recovery. It is a program that works because it takes us out of our rigid ways. We are continually made new. That is the vitality of the spiritual life.

God, help me to be open to new opinions - to things I had never thought of on my own.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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April 19

Worry and Stress

"Make plans but don't plan results." This is a simple phrase cautioning us against unnecessary worry and stress.

If our plans involve other people, we would be wise to work joyfully toward realizing our dreams, but we should not expect or worry if others do not want the same goals. Nor should we worry if others are not as enthused about our ideas as we are. We know, by applying the Serenity Prayer, that we can only change ourselves; we cannot force changes in others.

Another cause of unnecessary stress in planning results comes from our ingrained habit of regarding ourselves as inadequate. All too often, those of us who make plans give up on ourselves when we predict the outcome of our dreams on the basis of our past experiences. We falsely conclude that because we failed or felt empty in the past, we'll most certainly not succeed in the future; thus, we quit too soon and rationalize our resignation with a "Why bother to try?" attitude.

TODAY I will make plans but not plan results. I will work out my plan, one day at a time, knowing that my past performance is NOT an infallible indicator of my present or future success. I will look forward with hope, not despair.

You are reading from the book:

The Reflecting Pond by Liane Cordes

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April 20

Taking Care of Ourselves

It's healthy, wise, and loving to be considerate and responsive to the feelings and needs of others. That's different from caretaking. Caretaking is a self-defeating and, certainly, a relationship defeating behavior - a behavior that backfires and can cause us to feel resentful and victimized - because ultimately, what we feel, want, and need will come to the surface.

Some people seem to invite emotional caretaking. We can learn to refuse the invitation. We can be concerned; we can be loving, when possible; but we can place value on our own needs and feelings too. Part of recovery means learning to pay attention to, and place importance on, what we feel, want, and need, because we begin to see that there are clear, predictable, and usually undesirable consequences when we don't.

Be patient and gentle with yourself as you learn to do this. Be understanding with yourself when you slip back into the old behavior of emotional caretaking and self-neglect.

But stop the cycle today. We do not have to feel responsible for others. We do not have to feel guilty about not feeling responsible for others. We can even learn to let ourselves feel good about taking responsibility for our needs and feelings.

Today, I will evaluate whether I've slipped into my old behavior of taking responsibility for another's feelings and needs, while neglecting my own. I will own my power, right, and responsibility to place value on myself.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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April 21

Don't sweat the small stuff, and remember, it's all small stuff.

*****

Drinking didn't cause my problems, living did.

*****

The practicing alcoholic is the only person in the world who can lie in the gutter and still look down on others.

*****

AA meetings are the jumper cables God uses to get love flowing from one alcoholic to another.

You are reading from the book:

My Mind Is Out to Get Me by Dr. Ron B.

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April 22

Misery is optional.

We may have learned to be miserable, but we can choose to unlearn it. Though we can't control what happens to us, we can determine how we will interpret and react to what happens. We can moan about the things we don't like, using them as excuses for self-pity ("poor me"), or we can implement the Serenity Prayer, accepting what we can't change and changing what we can.

In the past, we often made ourselves miserable by over-doing things. Now, how often do we continue to invite misery by thinking we ought to be able to control other people? What part do unrealistic expectations play in the creation and continuation of our misery?

When we're hurting, we need to do something about it. A physical hurt may require a doctor; an emotional pain may call for a therapist or friend, and spiritual distress may indicate the need for more prayer and meditation, closer contact with a Higher Power. We can accept responsibility for our feelings, become willing to go to any lengths to get well, and choose not to be miserable.

Responding with misery is not on my list of options for today.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

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April 23

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Newcomer

Initially, I was excited about recovery. I felt better for a while. I hate to say it, but now that I'm not at the beginning any more, everything seems worse. I feel more cynical than ever.

Sponsor

What you're experiencing is part of the process of recovery. Many of us go through a "honeymoon" phase in early recovery. Our craving may feel miraculously lifted. Change feels easy, and hope replaces despair.

Then, life feels difficult again. We may perceive ourselves as having gotten worse, but that's not accurate. What's really happening is that, though our addictive craving has been treated, we still have our old problems, habits, and states of mind. We may be getting through the day, showing up for our work responsibilities, attending meetings, but not having much fun. We may wonder if what we've heard is really true -- that "our worst day in recovery is better than our best day of active addiction." We may wonder whether recovery really is the answer after all.

Our doubt makes clear to us that we have to do something. Staying where we are is too uncomfortable. We can attend a Step meeting and read program literature to begin to familiarize ourselves with our next Step. For spirits in need of healing, Step work leads to the next phase of recovery.

Today, I have the courage to move forward in my journey of recovery.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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April 24

Slow Down and Live

Many of us rush through our days as well as rush through our meals. Often we let ourselves get so busy that we do not enjoy what we are doing or what we are eating. We swallow life in great gulps instead of savoring it moment by moment.

Hurry and busyness are forms of self-will. Deluded by an exaggerated sense of our own importance, we deem it crucial to perform all tasks and activities according to our personal schedule. Impatient with traffic tie-ups, other people's slowness, or unavoidable delays, we make ourselves tense and miserable by our refusal to accept life as it comes.

Time spent each day in quiet meditation can give us glimpses of God's timelessness. We see that our schedule is not that important after all, when measured against eternity. As the presence of God seeps into our consciousness, we relax into the fullness and peace of each moment. Trusting our Higher Power to order our lives, we can slow down and enjoy God's gifts.

May I exchange hurry and busyness for Your peace.

You are reading from the book:

Food for Thought by Elisabeth L.

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April 25

A man of courage is also full of faith.
-- Cicero

Faith and courage walk hand in hand. Courage empowers us to act in favor of what we believe, but cannot know. Courage is animated by the vision of faith. It doesn't take any faith to perform an action that doesn't require a risk. Only when the outcome is uncertain, and the effort itself a feat of daring, must faith and courage come on the scene together to get the job done.

To reach out to another, if we have known frequent rejection, is to act courageously in spite of an uncertain outcome. To stand firm in a decision, if we have always given in and given up, is to back our faith in a most daring and courageous way.

Many recovering people, who never think of themselves as spiritual, are excellent models of faith because they continually reach out for what is not common in their lives. Because they believe, they're willing and able to take the risk.

Today, I can do what I believe I can do.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

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April 26

I believe that every single event in life happens as an opportunity to choose love over fear.
--Oprah Winfrey

When our past is strewn with tragic and abusive experiences, it's not easy to recall events as opportunities to love. Yet today we are safe, and we have come to believe a Higher Power has been watching over us every moment. Through the principles of this program, we are learning to forgive and to trust that we will always be cared for.

We cannot change the past. What happened and how we responded helped carry us to this point in our journey. We can cultivate love, now, for the present. The people who care for us will support us. The experiences designed for our progress will come to us. Our Higher Power will never leave our side. We can be free of fear today, if that's our wish.

I will not fear the events in my life today. I am ready for them. They need my involvement.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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April 27

Without discipline, there's no life at all.
--Katharine Hepburn

We all have deadlines we must meet. We have bills to pay, responsibilities at work, children with school projects - all the innumerable small markers that push life forward.

When we realize we're procrastinating, we need to be committed to not shaming ourselves. Procrastination is not an indication that we have failed. How realistic would it be if we looked forward to doing unpleasant things? It's human to avoid what we'd rather not do.

As we free ourselves from the burden of perfectionism, we're free to better accept our responsibilities. Meeting deadlines as well as we can, one at a time, pays off in serenity and a manageable life. When we are crisis ridden, we are forced to live by other peoples' demands, rather than by our choices. In the face of procrastination, resentment, or perfectionism, we can turn to Step Ten for an inventory. We can forgive ourselves, try to laugh at ourselves, live in the present, and keep going. Today can be better than yesterday.

I may as well admit it - there's probably something I'm avoiding. Is today the day to do it?

You are reading from the book:

Answers in the Heart by Anonymous

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April 28

Why go to meetings?

The first time we hear that Al-Anon is not about getting people clean and sober, we question the point of going. But what we soon learn is that the program is for us, not for the addict or alcoholic. We learn that we deserve peace.

We'll think with greater clarity because Step One will help us give up our obsession with the alcoholic. From Steps Two and Three we'll develop a trust in a Higher Power and thus give up our fear. We'll finally give up a burden we've carried far too long when we come to believe it's not our job to get anyone sober. Our job is to find happiness and offer love to others. Nothing can better us more than this.

Time spent at meetings is never wasted. My happiness will be strengthened each time I use some part of the program.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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April 29

Angels Are Everywhere

I never believed in angels. Now I do. I think of angels as people who do nice things for us without expecting much in return. They give for the love of giving. They seek out opportunities to help, even when it seems inconvenient. They don't always look like we expect them to look or smell like we think they should. Their beliefs aren't always aligned with ours. But when we need them, they are there.

One of the first times I really understood their concept was when I drove to New York from Las Vegas in 1982. There I was, thrust into a big world I had never known except in geography schoolbooks. I was terrified but willing to make the drive. This cross-country trip was to become a metaphor for the bigger journey in my life.

Angels were everywhere. I met them in gas stations and rest stops, on the highway, in hotels, at restaurants, and at every meeting place I stopped along the way. From Flagstaff, Arizona to Albuquerque, New Mexico; from Joplin, Missouri to Chicago, Illinois and then on to New York. Their support was unfailing. Because of them, I got from one city to another. Because of them, I completed my journey. My job was simply to show up; they did the rest.

When was the last time you recognized an angel? Perhaps they let your car pass into the next lane without giving you a dirty look. Perhaps they offered to assist you when you were overloaded with bags. Perhaps they gave you their seat on the subway or the bus. Maybe they gave you a gift they knew you'd like. Perhaps they loaned you some money, bought clothes or toys for your kids when you couldn't, or just lent a helping hand in whatever way they could. Or maybe it was a friend who just stopped in the middle of a busy workday to take your call or meet with you for coffee or lunch. An angel can be someone you know or someone you meet in passing. Angels enhance your life, if even for a moment.

You're invited to recognize and acknowledge the angels in your life, people who have contributed to your life in big and small ways.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Esteemable Acts by Francine Ward

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April 30

What is obvious to me is that we did not create ourselves... life is something inside of you. You did not create it. Once you understand that, you are in a spiritual realm.
--Virginia Satir

We do not belong to ourselves, but to the universe. No one planned to come into existence; we just happened to find ourselves here. We are the expressions of a life force whose beginnings are in the forgotten past. What does this mean on a practical level for how we will live today? For one thing, maybe we don't need to take ourselves so seriously. And we certainly are not to judge our existence. We have a right to be here, just as everyone does.

We can live this day fully and not hold ourselves back. We may work hard, play, and enjoy it. We need not rein in or attempt to control this force which so far exceeds our individual powers. Rather, today we can learn to flow with the current.

Today, may I remember my Higher Power is within every cell of my being, whether I notice it or not.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous