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12-08-2024, 05:35 AM | #16 |
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Daily Reflections PARTNERS IN RECOVERY . . . nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics . . . Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. . . . Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 89, 100 Doing the right things for the right reasons -- this is my way of controlling my selfishness and self-centeredness. I realize that my dependency on a Higher Power clears the way for peace of mind, happiness and sobriety. I pray each day that I will avoid my previous actions, so that I will be helpful to others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of A.A. is the way of faith. We don't get the full benefit of the program until we surrender our lives to some Power greater than ourselves and trust that Power to give us the strength we need. There is no better way for us. We can get sober without it. We can stay sober for some time without it. But if we are going to truly live, we must take the way of faith in God. That is the path for us. We must follow it. Have I taken the way of faith? Meditation For The Day Life is not a search for happiness. Happiness is a by-product of living the right kind of a life, of doing the right thing. Do not search for happiness, search for right living and happiness will be your reward. Life is sometimes a march of duty during dull, dark days. But happiness will come again, as God's smile of recognition of your faithfulness. True happiness is always the by-product of a life well lived. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not seek happiness but seek to do right. I pray that I may not seek pleasure so much as the things that bring true happiness. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Two Roads for the Oldtimer, p. 138 The founders of many groups ultimately divide into two classes known in A.A. slang as "elder statesmen" and "bleeding deacons." The elder statesman sees the wisdom of the group's decision to run itself and holds no resentment over his reduced status. His judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound; he is willing to sit quietly on the side lines patiently awaiting developments. The bleeding deacon is just as surely convinced that the group cannot get along without him. He constantly connives for re-election to office and continues to be consumed with self-pity. Nearly every oldtimer in our Society has gone through this process in some degree. Happily, most of them survive and live to become elder statesmen. They become the real and permanent leadership of A.A. 12 & 12, p. 135 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Others must not define us. Self-image The thoughtless practice of lumping people into categories can be destructive. Some of us still seethe with resentment over the roles we were given in our families while growing up. We realize that this way of being defined was a put-down. As adults living sober, we must now make sure that we define ourselves in ways that contribute to our success and happiness. If others attempt to attach labels to us, we must not accept this... at least not in our own minds. If others are attempting to define us in this way, we must always ask whether we've invited such labeling. Did your behavior somehow give them this impression? Did we mask our true feelings to present an image with which we don't really want to live? Whatever the answer, we must take charge of defining who we are and what we want to be. If I don't like the way people have been viewing me, I'll change the signals I've been sending out. Any signals I send should fit the way I really want to be known. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Charity sees the need, not the cause.--German proverb. Charity is not just giving money to good causes. Charity is having a heart that's ready to give. Charity is helping a friend at two in the morning. Charity is going early to the meeting to put on coffee without being asked. Service is how Twelve Step programs refer to "Charity". Service and charity are a lifestyle. We see a need, so we try to help. Our values and our heart will guide us in how we help. Service is a big part of our program. Service helps us think of others, not just of ourselves. We stop asking, "What's in it for me?" The act of helping others is what's in it for us. Sobriety is what's in it for us. Serenity is what's in it for us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have given me many talents. Help me see how my talents can make the world a better place. Giving of myself is believing in You and myself. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list my talents and I'll think of ways I can use them to help others. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To have someone who brings out the colors of life and whose very presence offers tranquility and contentment enriches my being and makes me grateful for the opportunity to share. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Loneliness and isolation are familiar states to most of us. We often protected our insecurities by hiding out, believing that we'd survive if others didn't know who we really were. But we discovered that our insecurities multiplied. The remedy is people--talking to people, exposing our insecurities to them, risking, risking, risking. Sharing our mutual vulnerabilities helps us see how fully alike we are. Our most hated shortcoming is not unique, and that brings relief. It's so easy to feel utterly shamed in isolation. Hearing another woman say "I understand. I struggle with jealousy too," lifts the shame, the dread, the burden of silence. The program has taught us that secrets make us sick, and the longer we protect them, the greater are our struggles. The program promises fulfillment, serenity, achievement when we willingly share our lives. Each day we can lighten our burdens and help another lighten hers, too. I will be alert today to the needs of others. I will risk sharing. I will be a purveyor of tranquility. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY But my friend sat before me, and he made the point blank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known! p. 11 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" I began to drink daily and rationalized that in France, of course, you have to have wine with meals. And after the dinner, after the wine, then there were liqueurs. My journals and letters bear witness in the deterioration of my handwriting as the evening wore on, drinking as I wrote. It was there too that I first became dependent on alcohol. After work, on the way to the Alliance Francaise for classes, I'd stop at a bistro for a glass of cognac to give me courage to get me there--my need being greater than the embarrassment of being a woman drinking alone in the 1950s. One vacation, I went to visit friends in Scotland, traveling slowly through the English and Welsh countryside. The bottles of cognac and Benedictine I'd brought as gifts for them I drank in little hotel rooms miles before I got there. As long as it lasted, I could stay out of the pubs. pp. 339-340 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We also clutch at another wonderful excuse for avoiding an inventory. Our present anxieties and troubles, we cry, are caused by the behavior of other people--people who really need a moral inventory. We firmly believe that if only they'd treat us better, we'd be all right. Therefore we think our indignation is justified and reasonable--that our resentments are the "right kind." We aren't the guilty ones. They are! pp. 45-46 ************************************************** ********* The secret of what life's all about, Was answered by the sages: Life's about one day at a time, No matter what your age is. --Robert Half "In discussing an approach to bringing about positive changes within oneself, learning is only the first step. There are other factors as well: conviction, determination, action and effort." --Dalai Lama "If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you'll never enjoy the sunshine." --Morris West "It is a defining moment when someone in authority finally reaches the conclusion that leadership is not about using people ~ it's about serving them." --Neil Eskelin "Until you have learned to be tolerant with those who do not always agree with you; until you have cultivated the habit of saying some kind word of those whom you do not admire; until you have formed the habit of looking for the good instead of the bad there is in others, you will be neither successful nor happy." --Napoleon Hill "Everyone Smiles in the same language." --Proverb "Pain comes like the weather, but joy is a choice." --Rodney Crowell, Singer, Songwriter God can bring showers of blessing out of storms of adversity. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GENEROSITY "Liberty is the one thing you can't have unless you give it to others." -- William Allen White Spirituality is rooted in a respect for self that demands an equal respect for others. I can expect to be treated with dignity if I afford dignity to others. In the one is the key to the many. For years I lived a compulsive life that only made me self-centered and spoiled, and it didn't work! I was unhappy, lonely and resentful. Today I find that the more I give to others the more I receive. Less is more. In this sense it is much easier to be good than bad because "goodness" works! Spirit of generosity, may I always reflect the gratitude that gives. ************************************************** ********* "I trust in the steadfast love of God forever and ever." Psalm 52:8 "The LORD protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me." Psalm 116:6 "Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content" 1 Timothy 6:6-8 "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." 1 Peter 2:9 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do that which is right and learn to do it for the right reason. Lord, give us strength as we stand up to temptation and spiritual power as we resist the pressures and stresses that bear down on us. You cannot ask too much if you use your blessings ceaselessly. Lord, help me to reflect on and live in Your spirit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Where There's Smoke... "Complacency is the enemy of members with substantial clean time. If we remain complacent for long, the recovery process ceases." Basic Text pg. 80 Recognizing complacency in our recovery is like seeing smoke in a room. The "smoke" thickens when our meeting attendance drops, contact with newcomers decreases, or relations with our sponsor aren't maintained. With continued complacency; we won't be able to see through the smoke to find our way out. Only our immediate response will prevent an inferno. We must learn to recognize the smoke of complacency. In NA, we have all the help We need to do that. We need to spend time with other recovering addicts because they may detect our complacency before we do. Newcomers will remind us of how painful active addiction can be. Our sponsor will help us remain focused, and recovery literature kept in easy reach can be used to extinguish the small flare-ups that happen from time to time. Regular participation in our recovery will surely enable us to see that wisp of smoke long before it becomes a major inferno. Just for today: I will participate in the full range of my recovery; My commitment to NA is just as strong today as it was in the beginning of my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Because you're not what I would have you be, I blind myself to who, in truth, you are. --Madeleine L'Engle Sometimes we expect far too much of the people around us, and because no one can ever live up to those expectations, we are almost always disappointed. But wouldn't it be better if we just let go, and let people be who they are? Then we'd be able to see them as they are--with all their beauty and goodness in which we take joy, and with all their faults which we can also see in ourselves. When we have put someone up on a pedestal, sculpturing them to fit our needs and desires by smoothing out the rough edges and creating new curves here and there, we cannot see the real person underneath our work. All we see is the illusion we have created. That is denying the person's real identity and is disrespectful. It's much better for our friends and for ourselves if we drop our expectations and illusions, and accept them all just the way they are. What unfair expectations do I have of others? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart And try to love the questions themselves. --Rainer Maria Rilke Patience with ourselves may be the first step toward patience with others. In getting to know ourselves, we don't find what we have expected. If we did, we would only be proving what we already knew. Sometimes growth comes in surprising ways. It may be in acceptance and learning to love what is unsettled or unclear within. Some of us men want to rush through our learning and push our growth too fast. Others of us want to have a strong sense of confidence in our relationships with others but always feel vulnerable. Some wonder why their fears suddenly rise without warning. Another longs to know why certain things happened to him in his youth. Our growth is not our invention. When answers come, they are gifts, and we do not control them. In part, self-acceptance is to say, "Yes, I am a person with this question, this unsettled feeling. Being alive is to be actively engaged in knowing and loving my questions even when I find no answer." God, grant me the peace that comes with loving the unfinished part of me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To have someone who brings out the colors of life and whose very presence offers tranquility and contentment enriches my being and makes me grateful for the opportunity to share. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly Loneliness and isolation are familiar states to most of us. We often protected our insecurities by hiding out, believing that we'd survive if others didn't know who we really were. But we discovered that our insecurities multiplied. The remedy is people--talking to people, exposing our insecurities to them, risking, risking, risking. Sharing our mutual vulnerabilities helps us see how fully alike we are. Our most hated shortcoming is not unique, and that brings relief. It's so easy to feel utterly shamed in isolation. Hearing another woman say "I understand. I struggle with jealousy too," lifts the shame, the dread, the burden of silence. The program has taught us that secrets make us sick, and the longer we protect them, the greater are our struggles. The program promises fulfillment, serenity, achievement when we willingly share our lives. Each day we can lighten our burdens and help another lighten hers, too. I will be alert today to the needs of others. I will risk sharing. I will be a purveyor of tranquility. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Taking Care of Ourselves Emotionally What does it mean to take care of myself emotionally? I recognize when I'm feeling angry, and I accept that feeling without shame or blame. I recognize when I'm feeling hurt, and I accept those feelings without attempting to punish the source of my pain. I recognize and feel fear when that emotion presents itself. I allow myself to feel happiness, joy, and love when those emotions are available. Taking care of myself means I've made a decision that it's okay to feel. Taking care of my emotions means I allow myself to stay with the feeling until it's time to release it and go on to the next one. I recognize that sometimes my feelings can help point me toward reality, but sometimes my feelings are deceptive. They are important, but I do not have to let them control me. I can feel, and think too. I talk to people about my feelings when that's appropriate and safe. I reach out for help or guidance if I get stuck in a particular emotion. I'm open to the lessons my emotions may be trying to teach me. After I feel, accept, and release the feeling, I ask myself what it is I want or need to do to take care of myself. Taking care of myself emotionally means I value, treasure, explore, and cherish the emotional part of myself. Today, I will take care of myself emotionally. I will be open to, and accepting of, the emotional part of myself and other people. I will strive for balance by combining emotions with reason, but I will not allow intellect to push the emotional part of myself away. Whatever I am thinking right now is creating how I am feeling. I turn to positive and loving thoughts because I choose to feel good. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Be an Angel I often imagine that we keep the angels very busy. They tell us to turn here or there, warn us of dangers, say Listen! and Look! They tell us things will be okay, and they’re sorry we hurt. Angels in our lives encourage us to hope, dream, dare, and trust. They point out beautiful sights. They shine a light on our path, so we know where to step next. Most of us are not as sure of ourselves as we’d like others to think. We need guidance, faith, and hope. We need to know we’re on track and that someone cares. We need the angels to help us. The angels in our lives give us a kind word, share a kind thought, offer a helping hand and a warm smile. Their words empower and comfort us. Their touch heals, their loving looks warm our hearts. They radiate love and faith. “I’ve learned it’s easy to be loving,” one man said. “What takes work is to be kind.” Make it easier for the angels, and easier for others. Practice being loving and kind. Be an angel,too. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Now is a powerful time “The entire skydive is great,” a friend said to me. “But one of my favorite moments is when we open the door, and I can see the whole sky spread out in front of me.” I remember that feeling the day I was given the choice to recover from chemical dependency or go to jail, the day I got my frist writing job, the day my daughter gave birth to her first child. It’s that split second when now freezes and stretches out into infinity. For just a moment all that has been and all that might be crown into a single arc in time and the power of the universe rushes through us. Get a little of that feeling every day just to remind yourself of the power and potential of now. Sure, we can envision our rosy future after the big project pays off, or when we’ve got fifteen years of sobriety, or after we reach retirement. But what about that moment when the minister pronounces you husband and wife, or the moment after you tell your parents you’re gay, or the day you walk out on someone, or the day someone walks out on you? The power isn’t out there somewhere in the distant horizon. Feel the rush of the moment. It really is your life. You have all the power you need, right now. God, help me tap into the rush of power available to me right here and right now. *************************************** Discovering True Selves Soul Seeing When we want to see deeply into the heart and mind of another person, soul seeing, also called soul gazing, allows us to see their soul. The soul is the purest expression of an individual and is not bound by physical forms or fleeting emotions. Through a simple art that involves looking deeply into a partner’s eyes, soul seeing can show you a person’s inner beauty that you might otherwise miss. It is possible for someone who appears cold to have a warm, giving, nurturing soul or someone of average appearance to have a beautiful soul. Soul seeing is a way of looking past shapes, sizes, attitudes, and behavior to see the real individual that lies beneath the surface. It allows you to see the true essence of another person, the radiance of their being, and their spirit within. Soul seeing is accomplished by sitting face to face with another person. It is helpful to first state your intention before you begin. As you stare softly into each other’s eyes without stopping to look away, each of your souls is revealed to the other. Try not to look for anything in particular or seek traits you’re hoping to find. Simply let the other person’s soul reveal itself to you. After twenty minutes have passed, stay where you are and share a period of silent reflection with your partner for two minutes. You may have suddenly seen your partner’s inner nature as clearly as a bright day, or you may need to meditate on your experience before you feel comfortable with your impressions. Either way, soul seeing can be a wonderfully intimate and shared experience. So little of who each of us is can be captured by our appearance or personality. The thoughts, fears, desires, and longings that are part of what makes us whole are not always written across our faces. Often, the most surprising thing you may learn while soul seeing is that while you and the other person may appear on the surface to be quite different, you actually share many of the same inner qualities. And then there is the unique beauty that resides within that is longing to be revealed to another who is willing to see. Soul seeing can help you experience the people in your life as they truly are, beyond any mental barriers or physical limitations. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Sometimes, on those bad days we all have from time to time, it almost seems that God doesn’t want us to be happy here on earth and, for those of us who believe in an afterlife, that He demands pain and suffering in this life as the price of happiness in the next. The Program teaches me that just the opposite is the case. God wants me to be happy right here on earth — right now. When I allow Him to, He will even point out the way. Do I sometimes stubbornly refuse to look where God is pointing? Today I Pray I pray that I am not playing the perennial sufferer, dragging around in the boots of tragedy and acting as if suffering is the only ticket to heaven. May I look around, at the goodness and greenery of earth, which is testimony enough that our life here is meant to be more than just one pitfall after another. Man no misconception of God as a master trapper, waiting in every thicket to snare us, distort my relationship with a loving, forgiving Higher Power. Today I Will Remember There is more to life than suffering. *************************************** One More Day It is well that there is no one without a fault, for he would not have a friend in the world. – William Hazlitt As youngsters we may have had doubts, just as we do now, about making new friends. We imposed unwritten rules upon ourselves as we sought out new friends. Will they like me? How do I approach them? Will we have enough to talk about? These questions are again in our minds as we approach old and new relationships. We might worry that since we aren’t always feeling happy and well, our friends is not usually true, but it may take us a little while to pull away from fear and self-doubt and to make real efforts at making and maintaining our friendships. Today, I will let my friends know just how important they are to me. ************************************ Food For Thought Getting Well Our recovery is always in process; it is never completed. If we think for a minute that we have conquered our disease and no longer have to consider it that is the time when we are in danger of slipping. Getting well is what we will be doing for the rest of our lives. Fortunately, we have guidelines and a fellowship to support us. We are not required to think about our disease twenty-four hours a day. We do need to remember it when thoughts of food and eating arise. We also need to remember it when we find ourselves thinking the kind of thoughts or feeling the moods, which led to binges in the past. Getting well is an adventure. We have moved out of the repetitious rut of past habits and are reaching into the unknown. There are times when we are anxious and fearful that we will not be able to make it. We are not alone. There is a Higher Power that guides us and an organization of friends who sustain us. The process of getting well is a privilege and a gift. Thank You for the process of getting well. ***************************************** One Day At A Time COURAGE "Courage is the power to let go of the familiar." Raymond Linquist (For many years, the pastor at the Hollywood Presbyterian Church in Hollywood, California) A sponsor once asked me what I had against feeling good. I had no answer. I now see that in my sickness and ignorance I hung onto the familiar, what I perceived to be truth. Fear kept me from trying something new until I hurt bad enough to beg God for the courage to try a different way. I am amazed at how long I put up with a miserable existence, not even recognizing my fear of change. I understand now that, although physically full-grown, I am spiritually still growing and becoming. One Day at a Time . . . Do I have the courage to change? To even look at change? Jeremiah ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that is it fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. - Pg. 66 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on holding to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Learning from Life There are no 'buts' today. I am what I am, others are what they are, life is what it is. I will not parenthesize my growth with a 'but' or hold back my forward-moving spirit with second-guesses. For today, I am living with things as they are. I am exactly where I am meant to be, learning what I need to learn. All I need do is move through situations with willingness to learn and openness to feel. When feelings are brought up, I can accept them as what is happening within me - no need to resist and analyze them. Transformation will happen in the moving through and the acceptance of them. I trust that my life is unfolding in such a way that what I need to learn will be before me. I am willing to learn. I see the 'table prepared.' - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote A temper will get us into trouble and pride will keep us there. I can't save my face and my butt at the same time. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book With the first three steps, you get the courage to work the rest. When you work the rest, you get rid of the garbage so you can work the first three. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Success consists of getting up one more time than you fall. - Anon
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12-08-2024, 05:36 AM | #17 |
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December 17
Daily Reflections A PRICELESS REWARD . . . . work with other alcoholics. . . . It works when other activities fail. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 89 "Life will take on a new meaning," as the Big Book says (p. 89) This promise has helped me to avoid self-seeking and self-pity. To watch others grow in this wonderful program, to see them improve the quality of their lives, is a priceless reward for my effort to help others. Self-examination is yet another reward for an ongoing recovery, as are serenity, peace and contentment. The energy derived from seeing others on a successful path, of sharing with them the joys of the journey, gives to my life a new meaning. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The way of faith is of course not confined to A.A. It is the way for everybody who wants to really live. But many people can go through life without much of it. Many are doing so, to their own sorrow. The world is full of lack of faith. Many people have lost confidence in any meaning in the universe. Many are wondering if it has any meaning at all. Many are at loose ends. Life has no goal for many. They are strangers in the land. They are not at home. But for us in A.A. the way of faith is the way of life. We have proved by our past lives that we could not live without it. Do I think I could live happily without faith? Meditation For The Day "He maketh His sun rise on the evil and the good, and sends the rain on the just and the unjust." God does not interfere with the working of natural laws. The laws of nature are unchangeable, otherwise we could not depend on them. As far as natural laws are concerned, God makes no distinction between good and bad people. Sickness or death may strike anywhere. But spiritual laws are also made to be obeyed. On our choice of good or evil depends whether we go upward to true success and victory in life or downward to loss and defeat. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may choose today the way of the spiritual life. I pray that I may live today with faith and hope and love. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It WHEN CONFLICTS MOUNT, p. 289 Sometimes I would be forced to look at situations where I was doing badly. Right away, the search for excuses would become frantic. "These," I would exclaim, "are really a good man's faults." When that pet gadget broke apart, I would think, "Well, if those people would only treat me right, I wouldn't have to behave the way I do." Next was this: "God well knows that I do have awful compulsions. I just can't get over this one. So He will have to release me." At last came the time when I would shout, "This, I positively will not do! I won't even try." Of course, my conflicts went right on mounting, because I was simply loaded with excuses, refusals, and outright rebellion. ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Looking For Protectors Self-Reliance Many of us managed to survive while drinking by finding protectors we could lean on. Sometimes the protector wasn't a very strong person---only someone who was willing to support us in some way. A protector could even be a person who gave us flattery or companionship when we wanted it. Such alliances are usually unhealthy and have no lasting place in society. We cannot depend on protectors who will eventually betray us or fail us through no fault of their own. In sobriety, we must grow into a satisfactory form of self-reliance. This is not reliance on our own resources; rather, it is really a way of relying on our Higher Power, the group, our sponsors, and the higher understanding we've found in the program. If we're still looking for people willing to protect us, we need more growth in sobriety. I've been given tools for understanding myself and my life. I can use those tools effectively as I go through the day. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together. --Saadi. When we were drinking and drugging, we didn't have to deal much with feelings. We turned them off. Then, when we let go of the alcohol and other drugs, we started to come back to life. Now--we have feelings again! But, even now, in recovery, we're scared of too much happiness. It's true--we don't want sadness and pain at all. Yet, feelings--the good and the bad--keep on coming. And we have to handle them. We are learning to handle our feelings. We're getting strong enough to deal with them. With the help of our friends in the program, and our Higher Power, we're ready for life. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I want to be fully alive, but I'm a little scared. Help me know what to do with my feelings today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll be open to feelings. I'll enjoy my good feelings and share them. I'll ask for help with hard feelings by praying, and by calling my sponsor. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Give to the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you. --Madeline Bridge We do reap, in some measure, at some time, what we sow. Our respect for others will result in kind. Our love expressed will return tenfold. The kindness we greet others with will ease their relations with us. We get from others what we give, if not at this time and place, at another. We can be certain that our best efforts toward others do not go unnoticed. And we can measure our due by what we give. A major element of our recovery is the focus we place on our behavior, the seriousness with which we tackle our inventories. We can look at ourselves and how we reach out and act toward others; it is a far cry from where we were before entering this program. Most of us obsessed on "What he did to me," or "What she said." And then returned their actions in kind. How thrilling is the knowledge that we can invite loving behavior by giving it! We have a great deal of control over the ebb and flow of our lives. In every instance we can control, our behavior. Thus never should we be surprised about the conditions of our lives. What goes around comes around. I will look for the opportunities to be kind and feel the results. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Had this power originated in him? Obviously it had not. There had been no more power in him than there was in me at that minute; and this was none at all. That floored me. It began to look as though religious people were right after all. Here was something at work in a human heart which had done the impossible. My ideas about miracles were drastically revised right then. Never mind the musty past; here sat a miracle directly across the kitchen table. He shouted great tidings. p. 11 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" Europe hadn't proved to be the change that would repair my life, and I started west again. It was in Cambridge that I pronounced my first resolutions about cutting down--New Year's resolutions I recycled for a dozen years while my drinking and my life kept getting worse. Alcohol had enslaved me. I was in bondage to it, although I kept assuring myself that drinking was a pleasure and a choice. p. 340 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." At this stage of the inventory proceedings, our sponsors come to the rescue. They can do this, for they are the carriers of A.A.'s tested experience with Step Four. They comfort the melancholy one by first showing him that his case is not strange or different, that his character defects are probably not more numerous or worse than those of anyone else in A.A. This the sponsor promptly proves by talking freely and easily, and without exhibitionism, about his own defects, past and present. This calm, yet realistic, stocktaking is immensely reassuring. The sponsor probably points out that the newcomer has some assets which can be noted along with his liabilities. This tends to clear away morbidity and encourage balance. As soon as he begins to be more objective, the newcomer can fearlessly, rather than fearfully, look at his own defects. p. 46 ************************************************** ********* "Enthusiastic people experience life from the inside out." --Nido Qubein There are two days about which nobody should ever worry, and these are yesterday and tomorrow. --Robert J. Burdette What people really need is a good listening-to. --Mary Lou Casey When I have done all the footwork I know to do and things are still not working out, I know today that it is time to meditate. I have faith that my answer is still to come. --Ruth Fishel No one else's opinion about me can determine my worth. --Mary Manin Morrissey "Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." --Melody Beattie ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FEAR "Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood." -- Marie Curie God is on my side. Today I really believe and understand this truth, and it helps me cope with my fears. Now I am beginning to understand that I was the only real enemy in my life. With this new understanding of God I have the power of choice back in my life. I do not have to stay in a sick process. I do not need sick and negative people in my life. I do not have to place myself in destructive relationships or in fearful situations. God is alive in my life and I am discovering the spiritual power of choice. God, give me the courage to confront my fear and be willing to make changes in my life. ************************************************** ********* "Behold now is the accepted time, behold now is the day of salvation." 2 Corinthians 6:2 "Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him. Proverbs 30:5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Treat your family as you would treat a best friend. Lord, help me to treasure my family with all of their imperfections as well as my own and cherish the time we have together. Let nothing that others do alter how you treat them. Lord, may I treat all with love and consideration. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Service Motives "Everything that occurs in the course of NA service must be motivated by the desire to more successfully carry the message of recovery to the addict who still suffers." Basic Text pg. xvi Our motives are often a surprise to us. In our early days of recovery, they were almost always a surprise! We've learned to check our motives through prayer, meditation, the steps, and talking to our sponsor or other addicts. When we find ourselves with an especially strong urge to do or have something, it's particularly important to check our motives to find out what we really want. In early recovery, many of us throw ourselves into service with great fervor before we have started the regular practice of motive-checking. It takes awhile before we become aware of the real reasons for our zeal. We may want to impress others, show off our talents, or be recognized and important. Now, these desires may not be harmful in another setting, expressed through another outlet. In NA service, however, they can do serious damage. When we decide to serve NA, we make a decision to help addicts find and maintain recovery. We have to carefully check our motives in service, remembering that it's much easier to frighten away using addicts than to convince them to stay. When we show them game-playing, manipulation, or pomposity, we present an unattractive picture of recovery; However, the unselfish desire to serve others creates an atmosphere that is attractive to the addict who still suffers. Just for today: I will check my motives for the true spirit of service. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain loving one another. --Erma Bombeck The most precious time we will ever have we give away by doing volunteer chores to help others get more out of life. There is no material wage for this kind of work, but a host of emotional rewards. The height of volunteer giving is doing an act of kindness or love so quietly that none but ourselves will ever know we had a part in it. What great humility this can bring to us, who live in a world where selfish people often insist on credit for all their deeds--often things they had nothing to do with. All we need do is think of all we have received without deserving it or asking for it. By taking part in the giving end of life, we find the true wealth of our own generosity. What secret gift can I give today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The purpose of man's life is not happiness but worthiness. --Felix Adler When we pursue happiness as a goal for its own sake, we usually reach the opposite point of emptiness. Feeling happy is a by-product of other life experiences. Happiness comes and goes. We welcome it but cannot capture and hold it, nor can we create a recipe for achieving happiness. We will lead far more successful lives pursuing other values which we do have control over, such as honesty, respect for others and ourselves, seeking loving relationships, and making a contribution to the well being of others. We can accept unhappiness and difficulties without struggle when we know we are doing something that has greater meaning. Our Eleventh Step tells us we pray only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out. This helps us focus on God's purpose for us. We can have an inner sense of joy knowing we are leading meaningful lives, even when we aren't having a particularly happy day. I will seek the goals that make my life worthwhile and welcome happiness when it comes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Give to the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you. --Madeline Bridge We do reap, in some measure, at some time, what we sow. Our respect for others will result in kind. Our love expressed will return tenfold. The kindness we greet others with will ease their relations with us. We get from others what we give, if not at this time and place, at another. We can be certain that our best efforts toward others do not go unnoticed. And we can measure our due by what we give. A major element of our recovery is the focus we place on our behavior, the seriousness with which we tackle our inventories. We can look at ourselves and how we reach out and act toward others; it is a far cry from where we were before entering this program. Most of us obsessed on "What he did to me," or "What she said." And then returned their actions in kind. How thrilling is the knowledge that we can invite loving behavior by giving it! We have a great deal of control over the ebb and flow of our lives. In every instance we can control, our behavior. Thus never should we be surprised about the conditions of our lives. What goes around comes around. I will look for the opportunities to be kind and feel the results. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Nurturing Ourselves Many of us have been so deprived of nurturing that we think it's silly or self-indulgent. Nurturing is neither silly nor self-indulgent; it's how we show love for ourselves. That's what we're striving for in recovery - a loving relationship with ourselves that works, so we can have loving relationships with others that work. When we hurt, we ask ourselves what we need to help us feel better. When we feel alone, we reach out to someone safe. Without feeling that we are a burden, we allow that person to be there for us. We rest when we're tired; eat when we're hungry; have fun or relax when our spirits need a lift. Nurturing means giving ourselves gifts - a trip to the beauty salon or barbershop, a massage, a book, a new jacket, or a new suit or dress. It means a long, hot bath to forget about our problems and the world for a few moments when that would feel good. We learn to be gentle with ourselves and to open up to the nurturing that others have to offer us. As part of nurturing ourselves, we allow ourselves to give and receive positive touch - touch that feels appropriate to us, touch that is safe. We reject touch that doesn't feel good or safe and is not positive. We learn to give ourselves what we need in a gentle, loving, compassionate way. We do this with the understanding it will not make us lazy, spoiled, self centered, or narcissistic. Nurtured people are effective in their work and in their relationships. We will learn to feel loved by ourselves so much that we can truly love others and let them love us. Today, I will nurture myself. I will also be open to the nurturing that I can give to others and receive from them. When I have done all the footwork I know to do and things are still not working out, I know today that it is time to meditate. I have faith that my answer is still to come. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Don’t Complicate Things The simple, clear answer to life’s situations can be easily found in the heart. Don’t limit its wisdom to just one or two areas; let it guide you through all of your life. Are you struggling with finances? Feeling overwhelmed by taxes? Not certain what to do to help someone you love? Do you have a problem with a friend? Has a business relationship gotten sticky, maybe hopelessly adversarial? Are you at war with the person you love? Problems with children? Problems with parents? A landlord who just won’t get the job done? All of these areas, and more, can be brought to your heart. Do you need to find a new hobby? Are you stuck on a project? Do you need an idea, some creative inspiration? Do you need a new place to live, or a way to fix your current home? Take it all back to your heart. Calm your mind. Let go. Get quiet. You don’t have to know the plan. Just put out the question, then listen to your inner voice. It will guide you through any maze you’ve been lost in. Don’t complicate things or try to figure it all out. The answer is simple: look in your heart. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Take another look at your world Oh, the glory of the ordinary! I wake up, roll over, and look out the sliding glass door at the sun rising over the distant layers of hills. Today will be a day of errands. We’re out of milk, so we’ll make a run to the grocery store, probably returning home with too much chocolate and no milk. The pictures from the last trip needed to be dropped off. We have a flying lesson at 2:00. Then it will be supper at the Lodge with our friend Andy. It’ll probably be something simple, like burgers on the grill. An ordinary day. I remember a time when the ordinary meant searching for another high, searching for money to get drugs. I’m grateful for the ordinary life that I lead. “When we have a toothache, we know that not having a toothache is happiness. But later, when we don’t have a toothache, we don’t treasure our non-toothache,,” Thich Nhat Hanh gently reminds us in his book The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching. Take another look at your ordinary world. See how glorious it is. *************************************** Sharing Your Gifts Gift Giveaway by Madisyn Taylor We all know how to give the gift of a present, but it is more important to share your gifts that you were born with. When the holidays come around, most of us join the masses in shopping for gifts, wrapping them, and giving them away. Once we are in the mind-set that this is what we are going to do, we don’t hold back or struggle with the process. We simply give the presents we have acquired, letting them go in the awareness that they were never ours anyway. If we could apply some of this unquestioning generosity with our own inner resources and gifts, we might be able to give of ourselves more freely. In truth, our gifts only make sense when we give them away. Imagine carefully procured and wrapped presents that remain in the house of the giver, never getting to the people who were meant to have them. If we hold back, not knowing quite when to share our gifts, we all lose. Ironically, the more we give of ourselves, the more we have to offer. For example, if we have a talent for singing but we hold it back, we sing less and have less experience. On the other hand, if we offer the gift of our voice to the world at every opportunity, our talent develops and becomes still greater, and we have that much more to give. How we present our gifts can be likened to wrapping paper and ribbons. When we truly value what we have to offer, our presentation honors what lies inside it. We speak well of our talents and introduce them with confidence and panache. Like a performer who chooses carefully what to wear and how to set the stage, we provide an environment that complements and enhances what we have to offer. Far from being superficial, a beautiful presentation is as much a part of the energy of gift giving as the gift itself. All these things together—the gift, the presentation, and the giving away—make up the joyful experience of bestowing our offerings upon the world. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day More and more these days, as I progress in my recovery, I seem to do a lot of listening — quietly waiting to hear God’s unmistakable voice within me. Prayer is becoming a two-way street — of seeking and listening, of searching and finding. A favorite bit of Scripture for me is, “Be still and know that I am God.” Do I pay quiet and loving attention to Him, ever more confident of an enlightened knowledge of His will for me? Today I Pray As I seek to know my Higher Power, may I learn the best ways — for me — to reach and hear Him. May I begin to feel prayer, not just listening to the sound of my own verbalizing. May I feel the sharp outlines of my humanness fading as His Godliness becomes a part of me. May I feel that I am one with Him. Today I will Remember Feel the stillness of God. *************************************** One More Day Sadness flies on the wings of the morning and out of the heart of darkness comes the light. – Jean Giraudoux Many people — not just the chronically ill — experience a sense of sadness or longing at this time of year. Perhaps the season stirs memories of carefree, happier times or, instead, of holidays long ago that were unhappy and without fantasy. Knowing that this sadness is not uncommon can be comforting and so is knowing we can resist sadness. If we’re unhappy with old traditions, we can introduce new ones. If we’ve isolated ourselves, we can join in some group activities. And if we’re tired, we can give ourselves permission to say no and to have time alone. We might also examine our expectations and remember that special days are not copies of earlier ones. Each is new. In the holidays ahead, I will continue to do the things that have been special. I will abandon any pattern that gives me no joy. ************************************ Food For Thought Remembering We remember what we were like before we joined OA. We remember the confusion and despair, which threatened to overwhelm us. We remember the agony of eating binges which started so innocently and which ended in such pain. As we recover from compulsive overeating, we remember events from the past in a new light. We see how our disease contributed to seemingly unrelated problems. We recognize feelings, which we were not aware of at the time. We understand the real reasons for some of our strange actions and mysterious fears. At the same time that it keeps us anchored in the present, abstinence helps us to understand the past. Integrating our memories gives us strength and confidence for the future. What we always need to remember is that we are compulsive overeaters still, no matter how long we have abstained. Remembering this fact protects us from allowing our disease to become active again. Today, I remember I am a compulsive overeaten. ***************************************** One Day At A Time PEACE "We cannot find peace if we are afraid of the windstorms of life." Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (Psychiatrist and author of 'On Death and Dying') My life always seemed so filled with difficulty. I seemed to have more than my fair share of traumas and losses. Why was I always being tested like this? It just didn't seem fair. I was so wrapped up in myself and the unfairness of my difficult life that I couldn't see that each of these harsh experiences had been opportunities for growth. Instead of bemoaning my fate and blaming people or situations for what seemed to me to be the cause of the current difficulty, I never looked at what part I had played in the whole situation, or the lessons I could learn from each of these experiences. It has often been said that God doesn't give us more than we can cope with. What I realized later, once I'd come into the program, was that each of these experiences had been a unique learning opportunity for me; they were a chance to grow and mature. I had been too stuck in self-pity and blame that I hadn't seen the wonderful gifts that I was being given with each new life experience. When I was able to open myself up fully to the lessons that I could learn from life, I became a whole person. It was then that the promises of the program begin to be fulfilled in my life, and I began to know serenity and peace. One Day at a Time . . . I will look for what lesson my Higher Power wants me to learn from life. I am then able to grow and change, and by doing so, I will come to know serenity and peace. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun! Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to. A Return to Living Today, I keep my house clean and let go of the rest - some of the ways that I wish to live as a recovered person will not be readily understood by others. I will keep my own scorecard clean and not worry about the results. I will act in a way that makes it easier for me to live with myself - that keeps my own conscience clear. Other people's negative projections of me no longer run me. I am the one who makes the decisions about who I want to be. I need not defend and explain myself again and again. I need not ask permission to be who I am. I allow myself to be happy in my own skin today. I think well of myself, no matter what others think of me. I create my own self. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The people you most need to give love to will seem like the ones who deserve it the least. It begins with me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Going to any lengths are our strengths. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It's not just the 'yets' I worry about if I pick up a drink - it's also the 'agains'. - Anon.
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December 18
Daily Reflections HONESTY WITH NEWCOMERS Tell him exactly what happened to you. Stress the spiritual feature freely. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 93 The marvel of A.A. is that I tell only what happened to me. I don't waste time offering advice to potential newcomers, for if advice worked, nobody would get to A.A. All I have to do is show what has brought me sobriety and what has changed my life. If I fail to stress the spiritual feature of A.A.'s program, I am being dishonest. The newcomer should not be given a false impression of sobriety. I am sober only through the grace of my Higher Power, and that makes it possible for me to share with others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Unless we have the key of faith to unlock the meaning of life, we are lost. We do not choose faith because it is one way for us, but because it is the only way. Many have failed and will fail. For we cannot live victoriously without faith; we are at sea without a rudder or an anchor, drifting on the sea of life. Wayfarers without a home. Our souls are restless until they find rest in God. Without faith, our lives are a meaningless succession of unrelated happenings, without rhyme or reason. Have I come to rest in faith? Meditation For The Day This vast universe around us, including this wonderful earth on which we live, was once perhaps only a thought in the mind of God. The nearer the astronomers and the physicists get to the ultimate composition of all things, the nearer the universe approaches a mathematical formula, which is thought. The universe may be the thought of the Great Thinker. We must try to think God's thoughts after Him. We must try to get the guidance from the Divine Mind as to what His intention is for the world and what part we can have in carrying out that intention. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not worry over the limitations of the human mind. I pray that I may live as though my mind were a reflection of the Divine Mind. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Those Other People, p.268 "Just like you, I have often thought myself the victim of what other people say and do. Yet every time I confessed the sins of such people, especially those whose sins did not correspond exactly with my own, I found that I only increased the total damage. My own resentment, my self-pity would often render me well-nigh useless to anybody. "So, nowadays, if anyone talks of me so as to hurt, I first ask myself if there is any truth at all in what they say. If there is none, I try to remember that I too have had my periods of speaking bitterly of others; that hurtful gossip is but a symptom of our remaining emotional illness; and consequently that I must never be angry at the unreasonableness of sick people. "Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again, to forgive others--also myself. Have you recently tried this?" Letter, 1946 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The Fear Of Loneliness Raising Self-Esteem The fear of being alone brings strange results. It may cause us to cling to arrangements and relationships that are unsatisfactory or destructive. Some of us become enablers for loved ones who are still drinking; quite often this can involve putting up with abuse we shouldn't have to endure. We endure such relationships because we fear we'll be alone and defenseless without them. We may even put up with friends who are manipulative or treacherous because we can't visualize having happier, healthier friendships. When we recognize that we are holding on to unsatisfactory relationships for such reasons, we need to apply the program more diligently in our own lives. Usually, we need more self-esteem--a belief that we deserve satisfactory relationships. We do not have to be alone, but neither do we have to endure what amounts to abuse and rejection. WhetherI'm with people or alone today, I'll know that all of my relationships should be satisfactory for everybody involved. I'll let my Higher Power guide me to the relationships that are right for me. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."Franklin D. Roosevelt As addicts, we had lots of fear. Some of us were afraid of failure. So we didn't try to do much. Or else we tried too hard all the time. We used alcohol and other drugs to forget our fear, but it didn't go away. It got worse. Now we know we don't have to be afraid. When our lives are in the care of our Higher Power, we're safe. Faith is the cure for out fear. But still, fear keeps creeping back inside us. That's okay. It's normal. There is so much that's new in our sober life! We don't know what will happen next. It's hard to always remember to trust our Higher Power. It's hard to always do what our Higher Power says. It's hard to always have faith. We have to practice turning our fear over to our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, be with me when I'm afraid. Help me remember to have faith to believe in You, even when my fear tells me not to. Action for the Day: Today, I'll notice my fear and pray each time get afraid. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Destruction. Crashing realities exploding in imperfect landings. Ouch. It's my heart that's breaking, for these have been my fantasies and my world. --Mary Casey We frequently aren't given what we want--whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth. Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down. We can cherish our fantasies--but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality. How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY I saw that my friend was much more than inwardly reorganized. He was on a different footing. His roots grasped a new soil. Despite the living example of my friend there remained in me the vestiges of my old prejudice. The word God still aroused a certain antipathy. When the thought expressed that there might be a God personal to me this feeling was intensified. I didn't like the idea. I could go for such conceptions as Creative Intelligence, Universal Mind or Spirit of Nature but I resisted the thought of a Czar of the Heavens, however loving His sway might be. I have since talked with scores of men who felt the same way. pp. 11-12 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" Blackouts began, vacant places in my life when hours would disappear, lost to memory. The first time was after I'd given a dinner party. The next morning I woke up without remembering that I'd told my guests goodnight and gone to bed myself. I searched the apartment for clues. The table was cluttered with dessert glasses and coffee cups. Bottles were empty, and the glasses too. (It was my custom to polish off any drinks that were left.) My last memory was sometime during diner. Did we ever finish? But there were the plates. I was terrified that I'd done something horrendous, until my friends called to tell me they enjoyed the evening. p. 340 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." The sponsors of those who feel they need no inventory are confronted with quite another problem. This is because people who are driven by pride of self unconsciously blind themselves to their liabilities. These newcomers scarcely need comforting. The problem is to help them discover a chink in the walls their ego has built, through which the light of reason can shine. p. 46 ************************************************** ********* Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it. --Ralph Waldo Emerson "Let me tell thee, time is a very precious gift of God; so precious that it is only given to us moment by moment." --Amelia Barr Pain is never permanent. --Saint Theresa of Avila Meetings: A checkup from the neck up. --unknown Don't give up before the miracle happens. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FREEDOM "You are free and that is why you are lost." -- Franz Kafka Part of my understanding of spirituality is that we have many choices and we live in moments of "not knowing". Part of being human is that we have feelings of being lost. These feelings can lead to fear and loneliness or they can be seen as the essence of man's risk and adventure. With freedom comes daily uncertainties; nothing is predestined or made to happen God is in the choice. Herein lies true greatness. The fact is that we do not have all the answers. We are not sure of the results. The joys are mingled with the pain and sorrows such is the divinity of life. And yet still we choose to live! Sobriety is accepting the reality of this uncertain life. My responsibility is accepting this freedom and making a daily choice not to drink. May I accept my "lostness" until I return home to You. ************************************************** ********* "...behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, 'Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit; she will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins." Luke 1:20-21 Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love, and His wonderful deeds for men. Psalm 107:15 Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress. Psalm 107:19 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you are not happy with what you have, how will you be happy with what you want to have? Lord, may I appreciate the good things in my life and refuse to feel sorry for myself or compare myself to others. Many joys come from the simple things. Lord, open my eyes that I may see the wonders in my life and take the time to enjoy them. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Message Of Our Meetings "The fact that we, each and every group, focus on carrying the message provides consistency; addicts can count on us." Basic Text pg. 64-65 Tales of our antics in active addiction may be funny. Stories of our old bizarre reactions to life when using may be interesting. But they tend to carry the mess more than the message. Philosophical arguments on the nature of God are fascinating. Discussions of current controversies have their place - however, it's not at an NA meeting. Those times when we grow disgusted with meetings and find ourselves complaining that "they don't know how to share" or "it was another whining session" are probably indications that we need to take a good, hard look at how we share. What we share about how we got into recovery and how we stayed here through practicing the Twelve Steps is the real message of recovery. That's what we are all looking for when we go to a meeting. Our primary purpose is to carry the message to the still-suffering addict, and what we share at meetings can either contribute significantly to this effort or detract greatly. The choice, and the responsibility, is ours. Just for today: I will share my recovery at an NA meeting. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Endurance is nobler than strength, and patience than beauty. --John Ruskin It's hard to keep from trying to control the lives of others, especially in a family. We can learn from the man whose friend drove twenty miles to and from work on the freeway every day. "How can you do it?" he asked. "I've tried, and I can't go a mile in such traffic without screaming at the crazy drivers who cut in, go too slow, change lanes. Nobody listens. I'd lose my mind if I had to do it your way." His friend replied, "Your trouble is trying to drive every car around you. I relax and drive only one car--my own." We have only our own lives to live, and this is usually enough to keep us busy. If we pay too much attention to how others live, we will neglect ourselves. What acts of others can I ignore today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Ultimately, both parents and children are seen as individuals. For all their claims on one another, each is entitled to a life separate and distinct from the other. --Francine Klagsbrun The process of untangling the relationships between ourselves and our parents - as well as with our children - is a long term process. Each of us came into the world helpless. As sons, we had no choice about relying on our parents. We reached manhood with a mixture of gratitude, guilt, and resentment. The same is true of our children. Those of us who are fathers began with an obligation to our children. We may now feel a mixture of commitment, fulfillment, and guilt. No parent can teach a child everything he or she will need. We all do what we can to continue to learn and grow. We have lifelong commitments to each other--within reason. We are all trying to make our way as best we can. We each need to advance our own well-being and not destroy our lives for the sake of a parent or a child. Today, I will be responsible for myself. Then I can be more responsible to others. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Destruction. Crashing realities exploding in imperfect landings. Ouch. It's my heart that's breaking, for these have been my fantasies and my world. --Mary Casey We frequently aren't given what we want--whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth. Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down. We can cherish our fantasies--but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality. How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Staying Open to Our Feelings Many of us have gotten so good at following the "don't feel" rule that we can try to talk ourselves out of having feelings, even in recovery. "If I was really working a good program, I wouldn't feel angry." "I don't get angry. I'm a Christian. I forgive and forget." "I'm not angry. I'm affirming that I'm happy." These are all statements, some of them quite clever, that indicate we're operating under the "don't feel" rule again. Part of working a good program means acknowledging and dealing with our feelings. We strive to accept and deal with our anger so it doesn't harden into resentments. We don't use recovery as an excuse to shut down our emotions. Yes, we are striving for forgiveness, but we still want to feel, listen to, and stay with our feelings until it is time to release them appropriately. Our Higher Power created the emotional part of ourselves. God is not telling us to not feel; it's our dysfunctional systems. We also need to be careful how we use affirmations; discounting our emotions won't make feelings go away. If we're angry, it's okay to have that feeling. That's part of how we get and stay healthy. Today, I will refuse to accept shame from others or myself for feeling my feelings. Today I welcome all my feelings. Today I deserve to feel joy and love and gratitude and warmth and affection, just to name a few. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Celebrate Holidays but Honor Your Holy Days Holidays help us remember important national and religious events. Holidays are marked by the calendar. Holy days are something else. Holy days are the days we remember not because they are marked on any calendar, but because they are important spiritual events to us. These are the days our souls remember. A birthday. The day a loved one left this earth. The anniversary of a significant change in our lives– the day we started something, the day we stopped doing something, the day we accomplished something important to us, a new beginning. Celebrate the holidays marked by the calendar in whatever way you choose. Some of these may be holy days for you as well. But remember to honor your own holy days, the ones that are special to you. Celebrate holidays, but honor your holy days,too. Choose your own rituals. Honor what is sacred to you. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Savor each moment Enjoy each moment as it comes. It’s so easy to relish that final moment, when the project is finished and the work is turned in. It’s easy to trick ourselves into thinking that peak moments in life are the only ones that count. In Benjamin Hoff’s The Tao of Pooh, Pooh talks about the anticipation of eating his honey. The moment when the honey touches your lips is good, Pooh says. But there’s the moment right before, that moment of anticipation, that might be just as good if not better. Go for your dreams. Go for those peak moments of performance and pleasure,too. The day you get your ten-year medallion for sobriety is a good day. Achieving that success in your career– that special award– is a wonderful moment, indeed. And those peak moments in love are indescribably delicious to experience and reminisce about. While many people talk about being in that peak zone of pleasure all the time, most of us know that peak moments are only a very small fraction of our lives. If we only enjoy those peak moments, or those moments just before, we’ll forget to notice the importance of a lot of our lives. Go for peak moments. But open up your heart and let the sheer raw beauty of all the moments in. When you stop looking and waiting for those peak experiences, you might find out how sweet and delicious each single moment really is. Savor each moment of your life. God, help me let go of anything that’s sabotaging my joy. Help me release the belief that I can only find happiness, pleasure, and joy when I’m on top of a peak. *************************************** Stronger for It Mending a Broken Heart by Madisyn Taylor A heart that has been broken and seen pain, reveals within it, a crack that allows more light in. Heartbreak happens to all of us and can wash over us like a heavy rain. When experiencing a broken heart, our ethereal selves are saturated with grief, and the overflow is channeled into the physical body. Loss becomes a physical emptiness, and longing is transmuted into a feeling that often cannot be put into words. Mending a broken heart can seem a task so monumental that we dare not attempt it for fear of damaging ourselves further. But heartbreak, like all emotions, falls under the spell of our conscious influence. Often the pain that wounds us most deeply also leaves the most enduring mark upon us. The shock that becomes the tender, throbbing ache of the heart eventually leads us down the path of enlightenment, blessing our lives with a new depth and richness. Acknowledging heartbreak's impermanence by no means dulls its sting for it is the sting itself that stimulates healing. The pain is letting us know that we need to pay attention to our emotional selves, to sit with our feelings and be in them fully before we can begin to heal. It is said that time heals all wounds. Time may dull the pain of a broken heart, but it is fully feeling your pain and acknowledging it that will truly help you heal. Dealing with your heartache in a healthy way rather than putting it off for tomorrow is the key to repair. Gentleness more than anything else is called for. Most important, open yourself to the possibility of loving, trusting, and believing again. When, someday soon, you emerge from the cushion of your grief, you will see that the universe did not cease to be as you nursed your broken heart. You emerge on the other side of the mending, stronger for all you have experienced. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I’m learning — all too slowly, at times — that when I give up the losing battle of trying to run my life in my own way, I gain abiding peace and deep serenity. For many of us, that learning process is a painfully slow one. Eventually, however, we understand that there are only two wills in the world, my will and God’s. Whatever is within my direct control is my will; whatever is beyond my direct control is His Will. So I try to accept that which is beyond my control as God’s will for me. Am I beginning to realize that by surrendering my will to the Divine Will, I am for the first time living without turmoil and without anxiety? Today I Pray May I hope that my will can be congruent with the all-encompassing will of God. I pray that I will know immediately if my will is in a useless tug-of-war with His Divine Will. May I trust God now to guide my will according to his Master Plan — and to make His purpose mine. Today I Will Remember Achievement comes when my will is in harmony with God’s. *************************************** One More Day The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith. – Franklin Delano Roosevelt Major changes in our lives may stun us — with delight or perhaps disbelief. After all, not all changes are negative. But when the change is negative, when illness is diagnosed or when pain pervades each day, we may begin to doubt our own inner resources. Once physically strong, we will have to dig deeper than ever to tap into our spiritual resources as well. If we have doubts today, it may be because we are still locked into our physical selves. We are more than body, and it is our spirits that can be nourished by our caring Higher Power, Our value and importance are revealed by that care. knowing this, we can move forward with our lives. I will look beyond my physical body for a source of strength and care. ************************************ Food For Thought Concentrating Our program requires concentration. It is not something that we may consider casually in odd bits of leftover time. Since abstinence is the most important thing in our lives, we devote our best energies to maintaining it. Many of us find that time spent concentrating on our program at the beginning of the day is most fruitful. These periods of concentration do not need to be long. It is the quality of our attention that counts. A few minutes in the morning spent in contact with our Higher Power can set the tone for the entire day. We touch base with who we are and where we are going. Concentrating brings results. Whenever thoughts of food and eating interrupt our activities, we can stop for a moment to concentrate on our program. Abstinence is not always foremost in our minds, but it is always there when we are threatened by a return to old thoughts and cravings. Compulsive overeating was concentration on food; abstinence is concentration on recovery. I pray that You will direct my concentration. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ACTION "You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working; in just the same way, you learn to love by loving." St. Francis De Sales (1567 - 1622) (in French, St François de Sales) Bishop of Geneva, Switzerland and a Roman Catholic saint. St. Francis de Sales lived from 1567 to 1622. Isn't it amazing that a man who lived over 300 years before the birth of our recovery program could encapsulate its meaning in the above quote? Put another way, what St. Francis was saying was, "You work the program by working the program." I've met so many people who had theoretical knowledge of recovery, but no practical experience. They don't work the program; they just talk the talk without walking the walk. I'm not proud to admit that I've been one of those people myself. It's a wonderful feeling to actually work the program, to take the Steps, and to trust in the God of my understanding to keep me working it. Paying lip service to the program doesn't bring recovery; only working it does. Anything else is a waste of time and energy. One Day at a Time . . . I will work the program by working the program; today, I'll take action to bring about my recovery. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As we discovered the principles by which the individual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve principles by which A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole could survive and function effectively. It was thought that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded from our Society; that our leaders might serve but never govern; that each group was to be autonomous and there was to be no professional class of therapy. - Pg. xix - 4th Edition - Forward To The Second Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Addiction is the great solvent that equalizes all people. We are equal in our addiction and equal in our program of recovery. Although with each passing day of sobriety we get clearer, we are only one fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort away from a binge--at 18 days or 18 years! May I realize I am no better or worse than another, or them from me. We are equal in our recovery. Letting Go Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order; it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb myself, I have missed the point of this process. On the other had, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have worked through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be fully healthy and return to life. The part of my healing that is a flowing through the stored pain from the past is a decisive, forward-moving action. I understand that, as part of my process of healing, my responsibility to let go and move on. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is co-dependence. If I can't say it kindly, I needn't say it at all. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It came to pass; it didn't come to stay. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote People think that they're going to get sober by osmosis and going to 90 meetings in 90 days. But there's only one way to obtain and maintain sobriety and that's through the program folded within these 164 pages. - Ted H.
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December 19
Daily Reflections UNDERSTANDING THE MALADY When dealing with an alcoholic, there may be a natural annoyance that a man could be so weak, stupid and irresponsible. Even when you understand the malady better, you may feel this feeling rising. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 139 Having suffered from alcoholism, I should understand the illness, but sometimes I feel annoyance, even contempt, toward a person who cannot make it in A.A. When I feel that way, I am satisfying my false sense of superiority and I must remember, but for the grace of God, there go I. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day The skeptic and the agnostic say it is impossible for us to find the answer to life. Many have tried and failed. But many have put aside intellectual pride and have said to themselves: Who am I to say there is no God? Who am I to say there is no purpose in life? The atheist makes a declaration: "The world originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere." Others live for the moment and do not even think about why they are here or where they are going. They might as well be clams on the bottom of the ocean, protected by their hard shells of indifference. They do not care. Do I care where I am going? Meditation For The Day We may consider the material world as the clay which the artist works with, to make of it something beautiful or ugly. We need not fear material things, which are neither good nor bad in the moral sense. There seems to be no active force for evil--outside of human beings themselves. Humans alone can have either evil intentions--resentments, malevolence, hate and revenge--or good intentions--love and good will. They can make something ugly or something beautiful out of the clay of their lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may make something beautiful out of my life. I pray that I may be a good artisan of the materials which I have been given to use. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Behind Our Excuses, p.267 As excuse-makers and rationalizers, we drunks are champions. It is the business of the psychiatrist to find the deeper causes for our conduct. Though uninstructed in psychiatry, we can, after a little time in A.A., see that our motives have not been what we thought they were, and that we have been motivated by forces previously unknown to us. Therefore we ought to look, with the deepest respect, interest, and profit, upon the example set us by psychiatry. ******************************** "Spiritual growth through the practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, plus the aid of a good sponsor, can usually reveal most of the deeper reasons for our character defects, at least to a degree that meets our practical needs. Nevertheless, we should be grateful that our friends in psychiatry have so strongly emphasized the necessity to search for false and often unconscious motivations." 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.236 2. Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Deadlines Facing delays The procrastination of our drinking years caused some of us to become compulsive and fearful about meeting deadlines. We fret and stew if we're unable to get things done when we think they should be completed. Without being careless or irresponsible, we should remember that we're really living in a spiritual world on a spiritual basis. There are times when a delay even turns out to be beneficial because additional information or assistance turns up later on to ensure the success of a project. It is part of mature living to keep promises and to meet the proper deadlines. Let's be sure, however, that we're not simply meeting unrealistic deadlines of our own making. We don't have to do this to atone for any failures of the past. I'll look over my plans today to make sure that I haven't set any unrealistic deadlines for myself. I may be trying too much, too soon. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The truth is more important than the facts. --Frank Lloyd Wright. Before recovery, we relied on false facts about addiction. We said things like, "I can quit anytime I want." "If you had my family, you'd drink too." The truth is, we were out of control. We couldn't manage our lives. We were sick. We were scared. When others pointed out this truth to us, we denied it. Honesty, the backbone of our program, is about truth. We even start our meetings with the truth about who we are. "Hi, my name is ___________, and I'm an alcoholic," or "Hi, my name is _______________, and I'm a drug addict." The truth frees us from our addiction. The truth heals us and gives us comfort. It's like a blanket on a cold winter night. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be an honest person. I pray for the strength to face the truth and speak it. Action for the Day: Today, I'll list 3 ways I have used facts in a dishonest way. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning My singing is very therapeutic. For three hours I have no troubles--I know how it's all going to come out. --Beverly Sills Have we each found an activity that takes us outside of ourselves? An activity that gives us a place to focus our attention? Being self-centered and focused on ourselves accompanies the illness we're struggling to recover from. The decision to quit preoccupying on ourselves, our own struggles with life, is not easy to maintain. But when we have an activity that excites us, on which we periodically concentrate our attention, we are strengthened. And the more we get outside of ourselves, the more aware we become that "all is well." It seems our struggles are intensified as women. So often we face difficult situations at work and with children, alone. The preoccupation with our problems exaggerates them. And the vicious cycle entraps us. However, we don't have to stay trapped. We can pursue a hobby. We can take a class, join a health club. We can dare to follow whatever our desire--to try something new. We need to experience freedom from the inner turmoil in order to know that we deserve even more freedom. Emotional health is just around the corner. I will turn my attention to the world outside myself. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, "Why don't you choose your own conception of God?" That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last. It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning. I saw that growth could start from that point. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. Would I have it? Of course I would! p. 12 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" One time we sailed from Guadelupe to a little island for a picnic, swam to shore from the ship. After lunch, and quantities of wine, I was with a French ski instructor talking to a troop of small boys on their way home from school, trying to explain to those tropical islanders what snow is like. I remember them giggling. The next thing I knew, I was back at the camp, walking to the dining room--apparently after swimming back to the ship, sailing to the port, then taking a rickety bus across the island. I had no memory of what I had done during those hours between. p. 341 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." First off, they can be told that the majority of A.A. members have suffered severely from self-justification during their drinking days. For most of us, self-justification was the maker of excuses; excuses, of course, for drinking, and for all kinds of crazy and damaging conduct. We had made the invention of alibis a fine art. We had to drink because times were hard or times were good. We had to drink because at home we were smothered with love or got none at all. We had to drink because at work we were great successes or dismal failures. We had to drink because our nation had won a war or lost a peace. And so it went, ad infinitum. pp. 46-47 ************************************************** ********* "Keep your head and your heart going in the right direction and you will not have to worry about your feet." --Unknown Reputation is what you are in the light; character is what you are in the dark. --American Proverb Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes of which all men have some. --Charles Dickens The mere sense of living is joy enough. --Emily Dickinson Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself, And know that everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, No coincidences, All events are blessings given to us to learn from. --Elizabeth Kubler-Ross ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation INDIVIDUALITY "The People, though we think a great entity when we use the word, means nothing more than so many --- millions of individual men (and women)." James Bryce I am an individual. I am unique. I am special. Today I am able to enjoy my difference. I do not need to hide in alcohol, food or drugs. I do not have to put energy into being the same as friends or neighbors. I do not need to please people in order to feel good about myself. Today I am my own person. God made us varied and different in so many ways, and yet so many of us spend our time trying to be the same. The effort exerted to achieve the lowest common denominator is exactly that: the lowest. My spiritual program demands that I be honest with who I am and what I feel. My self-worth is rooted in my individuality. In my difference is my soul. May I always remain true to my individuality. ************************************************** ********* "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30 For anyone who enters God's rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his. Hebrews 4:10 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need. The first and most powerful commandment is love. Through love we unite ourselves together with God and with each other and bring ourselves closer to our desired goal. Lord, I love You with all my heart and soul and mind. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Walking The Way We Talk "Words mean nothing until we put them into action." Basic Text pg. 56 The Twelfth Step reminds us "to practice these principles in all our affairs." In NA, we see living examples of this suggestion all around us. The more experienced members, who seem to have an aura of peace surrounding them, demonstrate the rewards of applying this bit of wisdom in their lives. To receive the rewards of the Twelfth Step, it is vital that we practice the spiritual principles of recovery even when no one is looking. If we talk about recovery at meetings but continue to live as we did in active addiction, our fellow members may suspect that we are doing nothing more than quoting bumper stickers. What we pass on to newer members comes more from how we live than what we say. If we advise someone to "turn it over" without having experienced the miracle of the Third Step, chances are the message will fail to reach the ears of the newcomer for whom it's intended. On the other hand, if we "walk what we talk" and share our genuine experience in recovery, the message will surely be evident to all. Just for today: I will practice the principles of recovery, even when I'm the only one who knows. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Open your mind and your heart to be still. --Shawn Phillips In this time of international conflict and mistrust it is easy to despair. At times we may even feel hopeless as we hear about wars and weapons. But there is hope! Change can grow from within each of us. The world is like a tree--if the tree is diseased and the leaves brown and brittle, the gardener does not treat the branches, but tends to the roots. Our world is made up of nations, in which there are states containing communities of neighborhoods where individual people live. We are the roots of our world tree. As attitudes change; as we accept and love ourselves honestly and learn, in turn, to accept and love others regardless of our differences, slowly, the branches that extend from us and cover the world will grow strong. The peace we can make within ourselves can be reflected everywhere. Will I find the peace within myself today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If I were given a change of life, I'd like to see how it would be to live as a mere six-footer. --Wilt Chamberlain It's human nature for us to wonder what life would be like in another man's shoes. No matter how good or bad we've had it, we like to consider those possibilities sometimes. While we were still in the trap of living with an addict or being one, some of us used a fantasy world as an escape from our circumstances. Perhaps it was the only option we knew. Now we are in a program, which liberates us and gives us hope. It's not an easy program, but it is simple. We're learning that when we have a relationship with our Higher Power and become accountable, we gain more options and can have hope. We can do interesting and rewarding things in our lives now that were closed to us before. Sobriety makes it possible for us to go forward into reality and leave fantasy for play. Today, I am grateful for life in the real world that recovery has given me You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. My singing is very therapeutic. For three hours I have no troubles--I know how it's all going to come out. --Beverly Sills Have we each found an activity that takes us outside of ourselves? An activity that gives us a place to focus our attention? Being self-centered and focused on ourselves accompanies the illness we're struggling to recover from. The decision to quit preoccupying on ourselves, our own struggles with life, is not easy to maintain. But when we have an activity that excites us, on which we periodically concentrate our attention, we are strengthened. And the more we get outside of ourselves, the more aware we become that "all is well." It seems our struggles are intensified as women. So often we face difficult situations at work and with children, alone. The preoccupation with our problems exaggerates them. And the vicious cycle entraps us. However, we don't have to stay trapped. We can pursue a hobby. We can take a class, join a health club. We can dare to follow whatever our desire--to try something new. We need to experience freedom from the inner turmoil in order to know that we deserve even more freedom. Emotional health is just around the corner. I will turn my attention to the world outside myself. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Work Roles How easy it is to dive into roles at work. How easy it is to place other people in roles. Sometimes, this is necessary, appropriate, and expedient. But we can also let our self-shine through our role. There is joy in giving our gift of skill at work, at giving ourselves to the task at hand so thoroughly that we experience an intimate relationship with our work. There is joy when we create or accomplish a task and can say, "Well done!" There is also joy when we are our self at work, and when we discover and appreciate those around us. The most unpleasant, mundane task can be breezed through when we stop thinking of ourselves as a robot and allow ourselves to be a person. Those around us will respond warmly when we treat them as individuals and not job defined roles. This does not mean we need to become inappropriately entangled with others. It means that, whether we are an employer or an employee, when people are allowed to be people who perform tasks instead of task performers, we are happier and more content people. Today, I will let myself shine through my task at work. I will try to see others and let them shine through too - instead of looking only at their tasks. God, help me be open to the beauty of others and myself at work. Help me maintain healthy relationships with people at work. In quiet meditation I find emotional balance. I feel myself growing closer and closer to my Higher Power and I find love. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Look for the Deeper Picture The two men were sitting in a restaurant booth, staring intently at the Magic Eye pictures on the wall. “I’ve tried for years to see the picture hidden inside, but I can’t,” said one. “Everyone says it’s there though, so I’ll just have to trust that it is.” Magic Eye pictures have been popular for some time. At first, the picture looks like a print; it’s often a repetitive pattern of the sort you see on wallpaper or a tablecloth. It’s pretty to look at, but it’s not really a picture. But another picture, a 3-D picture is hidden within the print or pattern– one you can see only if you relax your vision and look in a special way. Then the real picture, the deeper picture, appears. I have always thought these pictures contain a lesson. They remind us to look past the daily superficial events of our lives and trust that there is meaning, that there is a deeper picture, one that can be seen only with the eyes of your soul. As we go through our days, weeks, and months, what we’re experiencing doesn’t always make a lot of sense. Sometimes it causes downright distress. We’re uncomfortable. We feel out of place. We wonder if what we see is all there. Those are the times to stop staring so hard, relax our vision, and let the deeper picture, the real picture, come to us. Life goes on, with all its troubles, stresses, changes, and disappointments. But it isn’t a disconnected series of random events. It’s our punishment. And it’s not without meaning. Something important is being worked out in your life and in your soul. Learn to relax. Look for the reflection of something else in the picture of your life. Learn to look more deeply. Learn to look and see with the eyes of the soul. And sometimes, like the man in the restaurant, if we can’t see the picture or the real meaning, we just have to relax and trust that it’s here. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Have the time of your life Make every moment count. The first time I heard the words, I was sitting in the movie theater with Shane. He was eleven at the time. There were only a few other people in the theater, we had snuck out to see a show together. It was one of our favorite mother-son things to do, especially on Sunday nights. Until about a year before, I had been very goal oriented. I was always looking toward the future, moving toward the next level in my life. First there was getting through the poverty, then struggling to get beyond being an impoverished single parent. Then I began working toward the next level of success in my career. I was always trying to make my world and my children’s lives better. As I sat in the theater staring at the screen, I had a flash of my own mortality– at least I thought it was mine. I won’t be here forever, I thought. Someday, this time in my life will have passed. It’ll just be a memory. Shane put his feet up on the back of the seat in front of us. I started to nag him him about this, then I changed my mind. There was nobody sitting there. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I didn’t need to fuss about something that unimportant. Make every moment count, were the words I heard in my heart. It’s so easy to get hooked into the busyness of life. It’s easy to focus on the destination and tell ourselves we’ll be happy when we get there and forget to be happy and cherish the beauty of each moment of the trip. So often, we don’t even know that we’re living the best, most beautiful part of our lives right now. I worried a lot as a struggling single parent, trying to write articles for the Gazette for $25 an article. How will I make ends meet? Am I writing well enough? Geez, I don’t have time to date. Am I being a good enough mother? God, there’s a lot to do raising these kids. In retrospect, it was one of the best times in my life. No matter what emotions you’re feeling, no matter the nature of your problems, this moment is the best time in your life. Stop waiting to win the lottery. Or maybe, don’t stop waiting. Buy your ticket. Then put it away and forget about it. Be happy now. Don’t wait until later when you look back at this time in your life. Say how sweet it is right now. Make every moment count. God, teach me to be happy now. *************************************** Empathy in Action An Experiment in Gratitude by Madisyn Taylor If you find it hard to be grateful for what you have, it is time to dig deeper and be brave when looking for the gratitude. Sometimes we forget to take the time to recognize the richness that defines our lives. This may be because many of the messages we encounter as we go about our affairs prompt us to think about what we don’t have rather than all the abundance we do enjoy. Consequently, our gratitude exists in perpetual conflict with our desire for more, whether we crave time, convenience, wealth, or enlightenment. Yet understanding and truly appreciating our blessings can be as simple as walking a mile in another’s shoes for a short period of time. Because many of us lead comparatively insular lives, we may not comprehend the full scope of our prosperity that is relative to our sisters and brothers in humanity. If you find taking an inventory of your life’s blessings difficult, consider the ease with which you nourish your body and mind, feed your family, move from place to place, and attend to tasks at hand. For a great number of people, activities you may take for granted, such as attaining an education, buying healthy food, commuting to work, or keeping a clean house, represent great challenges. To experience firsthand the complex tests others face as a matter of course in their daily lives, try living without the amenities you most often take for granted. This can be a great experiment to undertake with your entire family or a classroom. Understanding working poverty can be as easy as endeavoring to buy nutritious foods with a budget of $100 for the week. If you own a car, relying on public transportation for even just a day can help you see the true value of the comfort and conveniences others do without. As you explore a life without things you may normally take for granted,! ask yourself for how long you could endure. The compassionate gratitude that floods your heart when you come to fully realize your abundance may awaken pangs of guilt in your heart. Be aware, however, that the purpose of such an experiment is to open your heart further in gratitude and compassion. This awareness can help you attain a deeper level of gratitude that will allow you to savor and, above all, appreciate your life with renewed grace. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program teaches me to work for progress, not perfection. That simple admonition gives me great comfort, for it represents a primary way in which my life today is so different than it used to be. In my former life, perfection — for all its impossibility — was so often my number one goal. Today I can believe that if I sometimes fail, I’m not a failure — and if I sometimes make a mistake, I’m not a mistake. And I can apply those same beliefs to The Program’s Twelve Steps as well as to my entire life. Do I believe that only Step One can be practiced with perfection, and that the remaining Steps represent perfect ideals? Today I Pray God, teach me to abandon my erstwhile goal of superhuman perfection in everything I did or said. I know that I was actually bent on failure, because I could never attain those impossible heights I had established for myself. Now that I understand this pattern, may I no longer program my own failures. Today I Will Remember I may strive to be a super person, but not a super person. *************************************** One More Day Life is not merely living but living in health. – Martial Living in health may seem impossible for the chronically ill. After all, we reason, it’s difficult to live in health if we are sick. In fact, living in health is an old fashioned tier, almost like a benediction. These days we want to experience the wellness that goes beyond physical health by emphasizing emotional and spiritual health. For the first time we can allow ourselves the right to wellness despite physical illness. Even with an on-going illness, most of us don’t have constant pain or discomfort. there are many times we enjoy ourselves. Playing cards, gardening, going for a walk, praying, meditation — these activities exercise all of our being — physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I will consider my wellness, not illness, my life goal. ************************************ Food For Thought Climbing Eating compulsively was a downhill skid into despair. Recovering is an uphill climb all the way. It is not easy. The line of least resistance is the habit pattern we have built up over past years. Forming new habits is hard work. We do not stand still. Either we are climbing up step by step into recovery or we are slipping further down into disease. Each decision we make to abstain from the first compulsive bite takes us another rung up the ladder to health. Each time we refrain from anger, worry, or false pride, we grow emotionally. In every instance where we are able to turn our will over to our Higher Power, we gain spiritual strength. The climb is what makes life challenging and exciting. To retreat into food is to give up and lose the satisfaction of having reached a higher point in our journey. Realizing that we are and always will be compulsive overeaters makes us aware of our continual need to climb out of illness into recovery. We are climbing, with Your aid. ***************************************** One Day At A Time JOY "The way to do is to be." Lao Tzu (or 'Old Sage' -- born Li Erh) Sixth century B.C. philosopher who began the philosophy of Taoism It is not until we can let ourselves be who we really are that we can recognize who we REALLY are! In recovery I have learned it is by embracing myself as I am today that I will become increasingly aware of my true identity. It is not by denial or pretended "goodness" that the Truth is revealed, but by acceptance and humility. This is one of the many gifts of recovery ... we no longer have to "wait until." This program tells us we can be happy and free now. HERE AND NOW! But, my ego-mind gives me a different message. It says, "You can be happy, joyous and free when you lose the weight, get your health back, get that job, marry that prince, receive the next degree, and on and on. In other words, "You must wait and wait and wait, and maybe someday you'll be good enough. Then you can be happy." Our ego keeps us in pursuit of the elusive happiness it promises. One Day at a Time . . . I choose to be happy; I choose joy. Patt ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no 'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps. I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit. Reinvestment I have been through a journey of forgiveness. I've faced my anger and hurt and brought order and clarity to my inner world. I've accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things that I could. Because I've shown the courage to face my inner demons and look them in the eye, I feel stronger and more competent. Forgiveness of my self and others has offered me a way out of pain and confusion, and now I find I have a renewed interest in life. I see things differently. I feel liberated from something that was tying up me energy. And I recognize and accept my own humanity, and the humanity of others. I am ready and willing to reinvest in the ideal of love. I want to find worthy projects and passions, and put my energy toward them. I have something to give to the world and the world has something to give to me. I am right where I am supposed to be and I've met the challenges of my life. I am ready to live. I invest my energy with care and gusto - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote It is better to have some-one sober and hating you because you told them the truth, rather than have someone drunk and liking you because you told them a lie. I don't heap on the bull**** when the truth is like Miracle Grow "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Along the road well traveled, there are many pity potholes. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If you went to a critical AIDS ward and said 'I've got a deal for you; would you come with me to some meetings, meet and chat with some people, take some actions that seem strange to you - would you do that if I could arrest your AIDS? They'd sign over their homes to you. But, go to the alcoholism ward where they're dying from this disease, and they won't go to an AA meeting two doors down the hall. - Clancy I.
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December 20
Daily Reflections THE REWARDS OF GIVING This is indeed the kind of giving that actually demands nothing. He does not expect his brother sufferer to pay him, or even to love him. And then he discovers that by the divine paradox of this kind of giving he has found his own reward, whether his brother has yet received anything or not. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 109 Through experience with Twelfth Step work, I came to understand the rewards of giving that demands nothing in return. At first I expected recovery in others, but I soon learned that this did not happen. Once I acquired the humility to accept the fact that every Twelfth Step call was not going to result in a success, then I was open to receive the rewards of selfless giving. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Our faith should control the whole of our life. We alcoholics were living a divided life. We had to find a way to make it whole. When we were drinking, our lives were made up of a lot of scattered and unrelated pieces. We must pick up our lives and put them back together again. We do it by recovering a faith in a Divine Principle in the universe which hold us together and holds the whole universe together and gives it meaning and purpose. We surrender our disorganized lives to that Power, we get into harmony with the Divine Spirit, and our lives are made whole again. Is my life whole again? Meditation For The Day Avoid fear as you would a plague. Fear, even the smallest fear, is a hacking at the cords of faith that bind you to God. However small the fraying, in time those cords will wear thin, and then one disappointment or shock will make them snap. But for the little fears, the cords of faith would have held firm. Avoid depression, which is allied to fear. Remember that all fear is disloyalty to God. It is a denial of His care and protection. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may have such trust in God today that I will not fear anything too greatly. I pray that I may have assurance that God will take care of me in the long run. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Give Thanks, p.266 Though I still find it difficult to accept today's pain and anxiety with any great degree of serenity--as those more advanced in the spiritual life seem able to do--I can give thanks for present pain nevertheless. I find the willingness to do this by contemplating the lessons learned from past suffering--lessons which have led to the blessings I now enjoy. I can remember how the agonies of alcoholism, the pain of rebellion and thwarted pride, have often led me to God's grace, and so to a new freedom. Grapevine, March 1962 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Returning to Basics Continuing. Now and then, an AA discussion focuses on the theme of "returning to the basics." This is a good time to shake out the excessive concerns that might be cluttering up our lives. No matter how long we've been living in sobriety, we can never afford to dismiss the basic reasons we came to AA in the first place. We had made a mess of our lives, and no human power could relieve our alcoholism. By accepting and admitting this, we were able to find a new way of life. This was also our admission ticket to the larger society, where people are concerned about many things. We sometimes become too caught up in all these concerns even to the extent of forgetting our own needs. It's good, occasionally, to focus a meeting on AA basics. they are as essential today as they were when we first knew that we needed them. I'll remind myself today that the basics give me a firm foundation on which to stand. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. ---Edith Wharton Our Higher Power is the candle. And our hearts, like a mirror, reflect a warm, loving glow. But when we used alcohol and other drugs, we tired to be the candle. We wanted to have control. Many of us acted like this to hide how out of control we felt. We never thought we could be happy by admitting we were out of control. In recovery, we accept that it’s okay to be the mirror. We accept that our Higher Power is the candle that guides us. We want to be the mirror that reflects how much our Higher Power loves us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for the light and warmth You give me. Action for the Day: Tonight, I’ll light a candle and place it in front of a mirror. I’ll study how they work together to light the room. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never really live anyone else's life, not even your own child's. The influence you exert is through your own life and what you become yourself. --Eleanor Roosevelt Taking full responsibility for who we are, choosing friends, making plans for personal achievement, consciously deciding day by day where we want to go with our lives, ushers in adventure such as we've never known. For many of us, months and years were wasted while we passively hid from life in alcohol, drugs, food, and other people. But we are breathing new life today. Recovery offers us, daily, the opportunity to participate in the adventure of life. It offers us the opportunity to share our talents, our special gifts with those with whom we share moments of time. We are becoming, every moment of time. As are our friends. Discovering who and what we really are, alone and with one another within our experiences is worthy of celebration. I will congratulate others and myself today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Thus was I convinced that God is concerned with us humans when we want Him enough. At long last I saw, I felt, I believed. Scales of pride and prejudice fell from my eyes. A new world came into view. p. 12 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" The blackouts increased, and my terror increased with them. Telephone bills would inform me that I'd made late-night calls to distant places. I could tell from the numbers whom I called, but what had I said? Some mornings I woke up with a stranger who had brought me home from a party the night before. These things weighed heavily on me, but I couldn't stop the drinking that had caused them. That too gnawed away at any remnants of self-respect I might have had. I was incapable of controlling my drinking and my life. p. 341 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We thought "conditions" drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn't to our entire satisfaction, our drinking went out of hand and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were. p. 47 ************************************************** ********* Our struggle to be perfect at every stage of life is a common element of the human conditions. What comes with age and wisdom is acceptance of our imperfections. --Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water's calm. --Malaysian Proverb "One thing at a time, all things in succession. That which grows slowly endures." --J. G. Hubbard "Very often a change of self is needed more than a change of scene." --Arthur Christopher Benson For it is in giving that we receive. --Saint Francis of Assisi My spiritual home. is one of peace, serenity, and contentment. --Shelley I can go to a quiet spiritual place, one with God, and feel this busy world around me, is refreshed in beauty, love, and serenity. --Shelley ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PESSIMISM "Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both." -- Oscar Wilde Today I am able to see how I was always looking on the "gloomy" side of life. The glass was always half empty! I can remember thinking that nothing good was ever going to happen, life was to be endured, everybody had a price and people were all selfishly out for themselves. I projected onto others my own sickness, my own despair, my own pessimism. It was a suicidal existence. Today I choose to be a positive and creative person who refuses to be surrounded by negativism. My attitude in life makes all the difference to my enjoyment of life. Today my glass is more than half full and I am happy. In the gift of choice, I recognize my potential joy. ************************************************** ********* "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety." Psalm 4:8 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7 In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9 The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. John 6:63 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Thoughts are powerful, so pay close attention to what you think about. Lord, help me to think thoughts of love, peace and abundance so that this becomes my experience. There is a time for everything. Take time to pray, to sing, to laugh, to work and to touch the hearts of others. Lord, help me be aware that today will never return so that I will not misuse my time or waste it unwisely. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Overcoming Self-Obsession "In living the steps, we begin to let go of our self-obsession." Basic Text p.94 Many of us came to the program convinced that our feelings, our wants, and our needs were of the utmost importance to everyone. We had practiced a lifetime of self-seeking, self-centered behavior and believed it was the only way to live. That self-centeredness doesn't cease just because we stop using drugs. Perhaps we attend our first NA function and are positive that everyone in the room is watching us, judging us, and condemning us. We may demand that our sponsor be on call to listen to us whenever we want - and they, in turn, may gently suggest that the world does not revolve around us. The more we insist on being the center of the universe, the less satisfied we will be with our friends, our sponsor, and everything else. Freedom from self-obsession can be found through concentrating more on the needs of others and less on our own. When others have problems, we can offer help. When newcomers need rides to meetings, we can pick them up. When friends are lonely, we can spend time with them. When we find ourselves feeling unloved or ignored, we can offer the love and attention we need to someone else. In giving, we receive much more in return - and that's a promise we can trust. Just for today: I will share the world with others, knowing they are just as important as I am. I will nourish my spirit by giving of myself. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Give to the world all that you have, And the best will come back to you. --Mary Ainge De Vere When we share something of our own with a friend, it gives both of us a special feeling. Generosity blesses the giver as much as the receiver. Sometimes we feel selfish, wanting to hoard all our treats or treasures. But when we secretly hide them away, we cheat even ourselves from enjoying them. Giving love and friendship to others works in just the same way. When we express love and kindness to others, we feel more love toward ourselves. Though we may not understand just how it works, we can be certain it does. The more of anything we give away to others, the greater our own rewards will be. How can I practice generosity today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Faith is the bird that sings when the dawn is still dark. ---Rabindranath Tagore There may be many things in our lives that seem unsure or doubtful. Whatever our hope or personal need today, we are not given the knowledge that tells us how things will turn out. In the predawn darkness we don't know how the day will unfold. Sometimes faith is simply a matter of continuing with our program in the midst of our doubt. Then we can be certain that whatever direction events take, whatever pain or trial we must deal with, we will still have ourselves because we have been faithful today. Ultimately, it is when we have ourselves and our integrity that we are on the recovery path. It is our faith that keeps us there regardless of the setbacks and personal moments of darkness we each must meet. I will be faithful to my program, even in the darkest moment of doubt or fear, and it will carry me through. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never really live anyone else's life, not even your own child's. The influence you exert is through your own life and what you become yourself. --Eleanor Roosevelt Taking full responsibility for who we are, choosing friends, making plans for personal achievement, consciously deciding day by day where we want to go with our lives, ushers in adventure such as we've never known. For many of us, months and years were wasted while we passively hid from life in alcohol, drugs, food, and other people. But we are breathing new life today. Recovery offers us, daily, the opportunity to participate in the adventure of life. It offers us the opportunity to share our talents, our special gifts with those with whom we share moments of time. We are becoming, every moment of time. As are our friends. Discovering who and what we really are, alone and with one another within our experiences is worthy of celebration. I will congratulate others and myself today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Expectations of Others It is our job to identify our needs, and then determine a balanced way of getting those needs met. We ultimately expect our Higher Power and the Universe - not one particular person - to be our source. It is unreasonable to expect anyone to be able or willing to meet our every request. We are responsible for asking for what we want and need. It's the other person's responsibility to freely choose whether or not to respond to our request. If we try to coerce or force another to be there for us, that's controlling. There's a difference between asking and demanding. We want love that is freely given. It is unreasonable and unhealthy to expect one person to be the source for meeting all our needs. Ultimately, we will become angry and resentful, maybe even punishing, toward that person for not supporting us as we expected. It is reasonable to have certain and well defined expectations of our spouse, children, and friends. If a person cannot or will not be there for us, then we need to take responsibility for ourselves in that relationship. We may need to set a boundary, alter our expectations, or change the limits of the relationship to accommodate that person's unavailability. We do this for ourselves. It is reasonable to sprinkle our wants and needs around and to be realistic about how much we ask or expect of any particular person. We can trust ourselves to know what's reasonable. The issue of expectations goes back to knowing that we are responsible for identifying our needs, believing they deserve to get met, and discover an appropriate, satisfactory way to do that in our life. Today, I will strive for reasonable expectations about getting my needs met in relationships. Today I know that I am powerless over all the addictions, obsessions, compulsions and dependencies in my life. Today I am willing to let them go to a power greater than myself. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey to the Heart for December Discover Common Bonds "So many people have lost their families," the man said to me. "I have. But I'm beginning to discover that I'm part of a larger family,too. I'm beginning to see my connections to people all over the world." We all have people we love deeply and dearly, those people we call our family. We have blood ties, genetic ties, long-term relationships with the people in our life. But as we open our hearts, we'll discover a larger family,too. We have a kinship with those we've never met, even if they live in other cultures. We share many of the same emotional responses to the experiences in our lives, even though our journey may be taking place on different parts of the planet. If we study history we will see our connection to those who have lived before. The hardships they experienced, the lessons they had to face, were similar in many ways to those we face today. Lessons repeat themselves. The ones that are true seem to last. That's why they're called universal truths. What are you going through in your life right now? Don't feel you're the only one. Open your eyes. Open your heart to your connections with your larger family. Let them share their stories with you. Let them share their strengths, hopes, fears, and joys. Stop looking for what's different and what makes you separate and apart. Go on an adventure of discovering your common bonds. You're not alone. We're in this together. That's why it's called universal love. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go It’s sweet right now It was an odd friendship right from the start. I was in a local store, trying to buy some new rocks– a crystal, maybe some lapis– someting beautiful to change the energy in my house. “Kyle can help you out,” the salesclerk said. “He knows all about our stones.” Kyle talked to me for a while about what stones I might like. Then I left the store. A few days later, I wandered back in, and we talked a little more. By the time the first year passed, we had become pretty good friends. At that time, neither of us had a romantic relationship in our lives. We just hung out, went to restaurants, saw movies together, and talked on the phone. One year passed, then two, then three, then five. We started a bookstore together, and together we closed it down. Now Kyle’s seeing someone romantically. I am, too. We’re still best friends, but the wheel of life has turned again. We were talking on the phone just the other day. “For all our complaining and grumbling and carrying on, we sure had some good times,” I said. “Yes,” he agreed. “This is one of the best times in my life.” The ordinary moments that we each live through, in retrospect, look so rich and full. Why don’t we take all that wisdom and all that poignant reminiscing and realize that we’re having the best time in our life right now? God, this is the day you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. *************************************** Pushing Buttons Untended Pain by Madisyn Taylor When somebody continues to open our old wounds on purpose, they must be told that their behavior is no longer welcome. We’ve all had our buttons pushed to the point where we feel we can’t take it any more, and chances are, we’ve all pushed somebody else’s buttons, with or without knowing it. The button pusher may not be conscious of what they’re doing, but in the end the buttons belong to us, and we are the ones who must deal with what comes up. The more we take responsibility for our own feelings and reactions, the less tender these buttons will be. We’ve all had the experience of having someone snap at us, seemingly out of nowhere. This happens when we unconsciously push a button in someone else we didn’t even know was there. This can happen with a complete stranger and sometimes with a person we’ve known and been close to for years. We ourselves may have a relationship with someone whose buttons we secretly like to push. Buttons are just soft spots that have been touched one too many times, and they symbolize some pain that needs to be acknowledged and healed. This may be a wound from childhood, or some recent trauma, that we haven’t adequately tended. Whatever the case, when our buttons get pushed, the person who most needs our attention and caring is us, and blaming the button pusher only distracts us from finding a true resolution to our suffering. At the same time, if someone continually opens our wounds so that they never have time to heal, we are well within our rights to set a boundary with that person. Compulsive button pushers, who seem to find pleasure or satisfaction in hurting us, are not welcome in our personal space. In the end, knowing where our buttons are enables us to do the work necessary to heal. Freedom comes when we deal with the pain behind the button, thus disconnecting our automatic reaction to being pushed. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day When we compulsively strive for perfection, we invariably injure ourselves. For one thing, we end up creating big problems from little ones. For another, we become frustrated and filled with despair when we’re unable to meet the impossible goals we’ve set for ourselves. And finally, we decrease our capability to deal with life and reality as it is. Can I learn to yield a little, here and there? Can I apply myself with a quiet mind only to what is possible and attainable? Today I Pray May I see that striving for an impossible accomplishment provides me with an ever-ready excuse for not making it. It is also an indication of my loss of reality-sense which ought to involve knowing what I can do and then doing it. With the help of the group and my Higher Power, may I learn to set “reasonable goals.” These may seem ridiculously small to me, after years of “thinking big.” But, by breaking down my projects into several smaller ones, may I find that I actually can accomplish some high goals. Today I Will Remember Break down large goals into smaller ones. *************************************** One More Day Change does not change tradition. If strengthens it. Change is a challenge and an opportunity, not a threat. – Prince Philip At holiday times and anniversaries and birthdays, we may lament, “I can’t entertain anymore. I just don’t have the room. I don’t have the strength either.” Is what we are telling ourselves really true? Are our friends and families so shallow that they come to our homes only for roast beef or turkey? Do we really have to give up the joy of having company? Quickly we recognize the nonsense of such thoughts and cope with this situation in the same way we have with so many others — we change and we adapt. We can still welcome our loved ones into our homes. In the simpler meals and the casual atmosphere, our friends and family will find what they have come for — assurance that we still value their company. I will serve my guest as always — with love and fellowship. ************************************ Food For Thought A No Fault Illness Formerly, we may have blamed our parents, a disappointment in love, economic insecurity, or a million other factors for our addiction to compulsive overeating. We probably spent much time and energy trying to figure out why we overate. When we get honest with ourselves, we assume the responsibility for our own actions, instead of trying to shift it somewhere else. Many of us come to believe that we would be compulsive overeaters no matter what the circumstances of our lives. As we recover, we see that the why of our illness is unanswerable and unimportant. What counts is how we control it. We do not continue to berate ourselves for having this illness, or consider ourselves physically, morally, or spiritually inferior for having contracted it. Blaming ourselves is as useless as blaming someone else. We accept the fact that through no one's fault we have the disease of compulsive overeating. Then we get on with the business of learning to control this illness with the help of our Higher Power and the OA program. I blame no one for my illness. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ SPIRITUALITY VS RELIGION ~ Religion is a way for people to get to heaven, and Spirituality is a way for people to get out of hell. Anonymous Twelve Stepper I was raised in a home that was strongly religious. All of its standards and rules were based on religion, and on the standards of a rigid God Who is perfect, and Who calls His followers to be perfect. My mother is a person who seemed to find her mission in life by telling people how far they fell short of that perfection. I learned very early that I did not and would never measure up; that being part of religion meant accepting my inability to excel at its tenets. But when I came into this program, I began to learn about spirtuality. I learned about God from people who were not perfect, and who could accept themselves as they are. I learned about mercy and forgiveness from people with different faiths than my own; I learned about trusting God from people who did not even believe in a Supreme Being. What I learned has put "flesh" on the words of the Scriptures that I learned as a child. It has put life into my faith, for the first time, and it has helped me learn that I am worthwhile and acceptable just as I am. One Day at a Time . . . I give my life into the keeping of the God of my understanding, and know that my best is the least, and the most, that He expects from me. Donna ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When intense cravings for our drug of choice overwhelm us, we immediately talk to another person in recovery, no matter the time. Our program teaches us to rely on each other and they will welcome the contact! Give me the strength to contact another clean and sober person BEFORE I think of satisfying that craving. The Creative Power of My Thoughts Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being there for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were mine. I will be specific about what I see, smell, feel, and I will accept my inner vision as fully as possible. I will enjoy my vision, then let it go and move on in my day, releasing it with no thought of controlling it further. I will let it happen, if it is right for me, in God's time. All good things are possible for me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We may have empathy for your situation but we will not pity you. We know that pitying you leads to you pitying yourself which leads to mind-affecting chemicals. Rather than pity you, if you need an attitude adjustment, it's very likely a fellow group member will let you know. Attitudes are contagious. Is mine worth catching? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't 'people please', 'Higher Power Please.' Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote They take good scotch, put juice, soda, bitters and God knows what in it, shake it up, stick an umbrella in it - That's alcohol abuse. - Anon.
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December 21
Daily Reflections LISTEN, SHARE AND PRAY When working with a man and his family, you should take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 100 When trying to help a fellow alcoholic, I've given in to an impulse to give advice, and perhaps that's inevitable. But allowing others the right to be wrong reaps its own benefits. The best I can do - and it sounds easier than it is to put into practice - is to listen, share personal experience, and pray for others. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Have I ceased being inwardly defeated, at war with myself? Have I given myself freely to A.A. and to the Higher Power? Have I got over being sick inside? Am I still wandering mentally or am I "on the beam?" I can face anything, if I am sure I am on the way. When I am sure, I should bet my life on A.A. I have learned how the program works. Now will I follow it with all I have, with all I can give, with all my might, with all my life? Am I going to let A.A. principles guide the rest of my life? Meditation For The Day In this time of quiet meditation, follow the pressure of the Lord's leading. In all decisions to be made today, yield to the gentle pressure of your conscience. Stay or go as that pressure indicates. Take the events of today as part of God's planning and ordering. He may lead you to a right decision. Wait quietly until you have an inner urge, a leading, a feeling that a thing is right, a pressure on your will by the spirit of God. Prayer For The Day I pray that today I may try to follow the inner pressure of God's leading. I pray that I may try to follow my conscience and do what seems right today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Neither Dependence nor Self-Sufficiency, p.265 When we insisted, like infants, that people protect and take care of us or that the world owed us a living, then the result was unfortunate. The people we most loved often pushed us aside or perhaps deserted us entirely. Our disillusionment was hard to bear. We failed to see that, though adult in years, we were still behaving childishly, trying to turn everybody--friends, wives, husbands, even the world itself--into protective parents. We refused to learn that overdependence upon people is unsuccessful because all people are fallible, and even the best of them will sometimes let us down, especially when our demands for attention become unreasonable. ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Keeping the Faith with Guidance Good Orderly Direction Does guidance from our Higher Power always come through? We must believe that it does, even when we don't seem to receive a visible answer. Spiritual guidance usually doesn't come as we think it should. What we're likely to find instead is that over time, a number of unrelated events come together for a good purpose. Although this appears to be chance or coincidence, very important outcomes often develop from simple happenings___ maybe just from meeting someone on the street. We can never really determine how any chain of events will play out. The best we can do is to continue seeking guidance while following the highest principles in our program. Many chance happenings will be recognized as guidance when we look back at an entire chain of events. My best way to seek guidance is simply to remember today that my life and affairs are in God's care and keeping. The highest good will come from this. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Don't give your advice before you are called upon. Desiderius Erasmus If someone wants your advice, the person will ask for it. That's one reason why in Twelve Step programs we don't go around trying to talk people into joining. But people will ask us for advice. They'll see how we've changed, and they'll want what we have. All we have to do is tell them where we found it--in AA, NA or another Twelve Step group. We don't tell them what to do. We tell them our own story--what it was like, what happened, and where we are now. And we invite them to join us. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me carry the healing message of the program to these who ask for advice. Action for the Day: I'll make a decision to spend time with the next person who ask for my help. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY The real significance of my experience in the Cathedral burst upon me. For a brief moment, I had needed and wanted God. There had been a humble willingness to have Him with me---and He came. But soon the sense of His presence had been blotted out by worldly clamors, mostly those within myself. And so it had been ever since. How blind had I been. pp. 12-13 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" I needed a drink to go anyplace--to the theater, a party, a date, and later, to work. I would leave my apartment, lock the door, and start down the stairs, and then turn around and go back in for another drink to get me where I planned to go. I needed a drink to do anything--to write, to cook, to clean the house, to paint the walls, to take a bath. p. 341 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." But in A.A. we slowly learned that something had to be done about our vengeful resentments, self-pity, and unwarranted pride. We had to see that every time we played the big shot, we turned people against us. We had to see that when we harbored grudges and planned revenge for such defeats, we were really beating ourselves with the club of anger we had intended to use on others. We learned that if we were seriously disturbed, our first need was to quiet that disturbance, regardless of who or what we thought caused it. p. 47 ************************************************** ********* Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. --Arnold Schwarzenegger Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. --Buddha In helping others, we shall help ourselves, for whatever good we give out completes the circle and comes back to us. --Flora Edwards As long as I am willing, God will always provide the answers. No one said I would like them, but I accept them. --Shelley "Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it." --Thomas Paine Sobriety is a journey of joyful discovery. Recovery is not a race. Every recovery from alcoholism began with one sober hour. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation ORIGINALITY "Originality exists in every individual because each of us differ from the others. We are all primary --numbers divisible only by ourselves." Jean Guitton For too many years I tried to be "the same" as other people; matched their styles, repeated their words, did what they wanted, lived to please a crowd of people I did not really know and they certainly did not know me! I said other people's prayers, quoted other people's opinions and memorized the ideas of others and I felt empty. Today I value the lives of others but I am slowly beginning to explore my place in this universe. Today I accept the "specialness" that is me; that uniqueness makes me God's miracle. Now others are listening and benefiting from my life. ************************************************** ********* For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Ephesians 5:8-10 On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?" He answered: "`Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, `Love your neighbor as yourself.'" "You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live." Luke 10:25-28 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Growth is not easy. It comes from fully experiencing each situation and mastering it with understanding. Lord, Your presence in my life dispels my fears and guides me through all of life's circumstances. Today be cheerful when it is difficult and patient when that, too, is difficult. Lord, I will let Your love for me flow through me and touch those around me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Acceptance And Change "Freedom to change seems to come after acceptance of ourselves." Basic Text pg. 56 Fear and denial are the opposites of acceptance. None of us are perfect, even in our own eyes; all of us have certain traits that, given the chance, we would like to change. We sometimes become overwhelmed when contemplating how far short we fall of our ideals, so overwhelmed that we fear there's no chance of becoming the people we'd like to be. That's when our defense mechanism of denial kicks in, taking us to the opposite extreme: nothing about ourselves needs changing, we tell ourselves, so why worry? Neither extreme gives us the freedom to change. Whether we are long-time NA members or new to recovery, the freedom to change is acquired by working the Twelve Steps. When we admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our lives, we counteract the lie that says we don't have to change. In coming to believe that a Power greater than we are can help us, we lose our fear that we are damaged beyond repair; we come to believe we can change. We turn ourselves over to the care of the God of our understanding and tap the strength we need to make a thorough, honest examination of ourselves. We admit to God, to ourselves, and to another human being what we've found. We accept the good and the bad in ourselves; with this acceptance, we become free to change. Just for today: I want to change. By working the steps, I will counter fear and denial and find the acceptance needed to change. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I came to see the damage that was done and the treasures that prevail. --Adrienne Rich It takes great courage to face ourselves--to look honestly and fearlessly at our behavior, especially if we have done and said things we are not proud of. We may have caused a lot of sadness in our own and others' lives. It's not easy to look at. But let's remember, too, that what we do and say is not all of who we are. And let's also look at the treasures in ourselves--those things we have said and done that have brought great comfort, joy, and love into the lives of others. Beneath the negative parts of ourselves, deep within us, is a kernel of good. Let's look for that as well, and water it so it can grow--so we can grow into the persons we are meant to be. What is the best part of me, and how can I share it today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He not busy being born is busy dying. --Bob Dylan An old story has been told of men in the program asking an alcoholic who had a slip, "What Step were you working on at the time?" The man who slipped was not working on any Step, and that is part of how he lost his sobriety. The message of the story is that when we are not busy being born spiritually, we are losing ground. It is essential to always be focusing our attention on one of the Steps. Each time we work a Step again, we are at a new place in life, and the Step will inspire something new in us just as it did the first time. Although we may know the program well, keeping it as our center protects us from being reactive to the events and pressures in our lives. We are less likely to feel overwhelmed by situations or react with shame or anger. As long as we live, we are in need of being renewed. Today, I will choose one of the Steps and think about its meaning for me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Balance Strive for balanced expectations of others. Strive for healthy tolerance. In the past, we may have tolerated too much or too little. We may have expected too much or too little. We may swing from tolerating abuse, mistreatment, and deception to refusing to tolerate normal, human, imperfect behaviors from people. Although it's preferable not to remain in either extreme too long, that is how people change - real people who struggle imperfectly toward better lives, improved relationships, and more effective relationship behaviors. But if we are open to ourselves and to the recovery process, we will, at some time, begin another transition: it becomes time to move away from extremes, toward balance. We can trust ourselves and the recovery process to bring us to a balanced place of tolerance, giving, understanding, and expectations - of others and ourselves. We can each find our own path to balance as we begin and continue recovery. Today, I will practice acceptance with others and myself for the way we change. If I have had to swing to the other extreme of a behavior, I will accept that as appropriate, for a time. But I will make my goal one of balanced tolerance and expectations of others and myself. Today I seek spiritual understanding beyond everything else. I choose peace and love and joy as my goals. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Reduce Your Stress “Stress can be caused by many things,” a man, a healing professional, said. “It can be caused by toxins in the air, by food, work, money, or love. And sometimes tension and stress are caused by reacting to old beliefs– the messages in your mind.” We can’t always eliminate the situations that produce stress. Some stress in life is inevitable; it is part of being alive. Stress is often the impetus that moves us forward into growth, into emotional release and healing, into awareness and change. While we can’t and don’t want to eliminate all the stress in our lives, we can reduce its impact. We can eat foods we respond well to. We can monitor the quality of the air we breathe in many situations. We can leave a work or love situation that has become too stressful, or we can take better care of ourselves in those situations we choose to stay in. And we can work on changing stress-producing beliefs within ourselves. I can’t measure up. I can’t get the job done. I won’t be liked. I can’t trust myself. Many of these beliefs are outdated reactions to other times in our lives, and now we know we have the power to change them. What’s causing stress in your life? Do the things you can to reduce stress in your life. Reduce as much toxicity in your environment and in yourself as you can. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Lose those expectations So you meet someone, become infatuated, date, and allow your mind to create an exaggerated image of that person. Soon you find that he’s your soul mate. You don’t want to live without him; he means everything to you. And then he stumbles, somewhere around three months, maybe six months. He fails to meet your expectations. He loses soul mate status. “You just aren’t the person I thought you were,” you say, walking out the door. Of course he isn’t. He’s a person, not a figment of your imagination. Lighten up. Let each person be themselves. When we’re with someone, either as a friend or as a lover, a good deal of the success or failure of the relationship can be traced to our expectations. We get angry when we expect someone to behave in a certain way and he or she doesn’t. We feel cheated, lied to, and disappointed. Here we stacked all of our chips on a certain number coming up, and when it doesn’t, we get mad. Lose those expectations. If you enjoy another person’s company, then enjoy it cleanly and without expectations. People are people. They will stumble, they will get back up again– or not. You cannot control them. All you can do is learn from them, love them, and enjoy their company when they’re around. Drop the expectations. Allow people to just be themselves. Appreciate them for why they are. Let the love that you have for them grow out of that appreciation, instead of out of what you expect in what writer Natalie Goldberg calls “your monkey mind.” God, help me remember that when I lose my expectations I just might find real love. *************************************** Listening with Your Heart Less Thinking and More Feeling by Madisyn Taylor When we begin to listen with our hearts rather than our heads, our whole world changes and becomes softer. Most of us were born and raised in cultures that value the head over the heart and, as a result, we place our own hearts below our heads in a sort of inner hierarchy of which we may not be conscious. What this means is that we tend to listen and respond from the neck up, often leaving the rest of our bodies with little or no say in most matters. This is a physical habit, which sometimes feels as ingrained as the way we breathe or walk. However, with effort and awareness, we can shift the energy into our hearts, listening and responding from this much deeper, more resonant place. The brain has a masterful way of imposing structure and order on the world, creating divisions and categories, devising plans and strategies. In many ways, we have our brains to thank for our survival on this planet. However, as is so clear at this time, we also need the wisdom of our hearts if we wish to continue surviving in a viable way. When we listen from our heart, the logical grid of the brain tends to soften and melt, which enables us to perceive the interconnectedness beneath the divisions and categories we use to organize the world. We begin to understand that just as the heart underlies the brain, this interconnectedness underlies everything. Many agree that this is the most important work we can do at this time in history, and there are many practices at our disposal. For a simple start, try sitting with a friend and asking him to tell you about his life at this moment. For 10 minutes or more, try to listen without responding verbally, offering suggestions, or brainstorming solutions. Instead, breathe into your heart and your belly, listening and feeling instead of thinking. When you do this, you may find that it’s much more difficult to offer advice and much easier to identify with the feelings your friend is sharing. You may also find that your friend opens up more, goes deeper, and feels he has really been heard. If you also feel great warmth and compassion, almost as if you are seeing your friend for the first time, then you will know that you have begun to tap the power of listening with your heart. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Each of us in The Program can, in our own time and own way, reach the triumphant spiritual awakening that is described in the Twelfth Step. The spiritual awakening is a deep-down knowledge that we are no longer alone and helpless. It’s also a deep-down awareness that we’ve learned certain truths which we can now transmit to others so that perhaps they, too, can be helped. Am I keeping myself in constant readiness for the spiritual awakening which is certain to come to me as I practice The Steps and surrender my will to God’s will? Today I Pray May I be steady, not expecting that my spiritual awakening will startle me like an alarm clock into sudden awareness of a Higher Power. It may settle on me so quietly that I may not recognize precisely when my money of awareness comes. The clue may come in my desire to Twelfth_Step others. May I realize, then, that I have accepted the principles of The Program and am at home with the spiritual transformation I feel in myself. Today I Will Remember My spiritual awakening is my first private moment with God. *************************************** One More Day To know after absences the familiar street and road and village and house is to know again the satisfaction of home. – Hal Borland Home is a word that carries all kinds of meanings for us. For the majority, home has always been our anchor — the place where we can go even when we have had the worst possible of all days. Home usually means love, but it certainly means security and comfort. As the years go by we understand that home has little to do with a physical structure. It can be a tiny apartment or an elaborate mansion. Or — better still — it can be the special comfort and security we feel within ourselves. It is , after all, what we bring to it and to the people around us. Home is, and always has been, where our heart is. My home acts as one of the roots of my life, and it has all the qualities that I bring to it. ************************************ Food For Thought Paradoxes Our program contains some surprising paradoxes. When we admit that we are powerless, we can receive Power. When we accept what we do not like, it begins to change. As long as we remember we are sick, we can continue to recover. The key to these paradoxes is our willingness to believe in a Higher Power. By ourselves, we are weak, ineffectual, and sick. When operating in accordance with the will of the Power greater than ourselves, our potential is limitless. Until we admit defeat, we will not succeed with the OA program. The biggest defeat is the one that is dealt to our illusions of self-reliance and self-sufficiency. As long as we insist on trying to control our lives by ourselves, we will be confused. It is by relinquishing control that we gain strength and are freed from our compulsion and obsession. We save our lives by giving them away. May I accept the paradoxes that I do not understand. ***************************************** One Day At A Time BABY STEPS "I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble." Helen Keller (born Helen Adams Keller (1880 – 1968) American author, activist and lecturer and the first deafblind person to graduate from college). From as far back as I can remember, I believed that, in order to be worthy or loved, I had to achieve great things. It didn't matter what it was but I set out to be the best at whatever I did, hoping that would make me feel better. Whether it was academic or one of the many diets or diet clubs I tried, it was the same story, and failure was totally unacceptable. Delayed gratification was definitely not part of my vocabulary, and so things had to be done or achieved in record time. If I wanted something done, it had to be done today, if not yesterday. Everything I did was done compulsively. I was, as one person in a meeting described, a "human doing," not a "human being". Of course the things I could never really achieve were permanent weight loss and the serenity that comes with recovery. These seemed to elude me when I first came into the program, mainly because I expected to do it perfectly and in a very short time. After all, I had lost weight before, and quickly too. I had to realize that recovery is not a race, that this is a journey, not a destination. I don't have to do it all in one day, nor do I have to be the best at it. All I need to do is to take baby steps, one day at a time, and I will recover as God wills me to do. I just need to put one foot in front of the other and do what is before me. Recovery is cumulative and I build on it, day by day. One Day at a Time . . . I do the footwork and put my trust in my Higher Power, believing that, as I do what I need to do for today, God's healing power will come to me in the form of recovery. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon. - Pg. 59 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction. Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles. Standing in Self Today, I own the truth of my recovery. If I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home - to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me. Thank you, life, for letting me see this. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When working Steps Six and Seven we honestly have to ask ourselves 'Do I really want to give up the defect? Or do I just want to give up the result of the defect?' Being an alcoholic does not give me the excuse to act alcoholically. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can be a human being-you don't have to be a human doing. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Knowing why I was an alcoholic doesn't help. The ship hits an iceberg, it's sinking, everyone is rowing away. But you're on the deck saying; 'I'm not leaving this baby until I understand what happened.' - Clancy I.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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12-15-2024, 04:16 AM | #22 |
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December 22
Daily Reflections PRINCIPLES, NOT PERSONALITIES The way our "worthy" alcoholics have sometimes tried to judge the "less worthy" is, as we look back on it, rather comical. Imagine, if you can, one alcoholic judging another! THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 37 Who am I to judge anyone? When I first entered the Fellowship I found that I liked everyone. After all, A.A. was going to help me to a better way of life without alcohol. The reality was that I couldn't possibly like everyone, nor they me. As I've grown in the Fellowship, I've learned to love everyone just from listening to what they had to say. That person over there, or the one right here, may be the one God has chosen to give me the message I need for today. I must always remember to place principles above personalities. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day As we look back over our drinking careers, we must realize that our lives were a mess because we were a mess inside. The trouble was in us, not in life itself. Life itself was good enough, but we were looking at it the wrong way. We were looking at life through the bottom of a whiskey glass, and it was distorted. We could not see all the beauty and goodness and purpose in the world, because our vision was blurred. We were in a house with one-way glass in the windows. People could see us but we could not look out and see them and see what life meant to them and should mean to us. We were blind then, but now we can see. Can I now look at life as it really is? Meditation For The Day Fear no evil, because the power of God can conquer evil. Evil has power to seriously hurt only those who do not place themselves under the protection of the Higher Power. This is not a question of feeling, it is an assured fact of our experience. Say to yourself with assurance that whatever it is, no evil can seriously harm you as long as you depend on the Higher Power. Be sure of the protection of God's grace. Prayer For The Day I pray that fear of evil will not get me down. I pray that I may try to place myself today under the protection of God's grace. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Step That Keeps Us growing, p.264 Sometimes, when friends tell us how well we are doing, we know better inside. We know we aren't doing well enough. We still can't handle life, as life is. There must be a serious flaw somewhere in our spiritual practice and development. What, then, is it? The chances are better than even that we shall locate our trouble in our misunderstanding or neglect of A.A.'s Step Eleven--prayer, meditation, and the guidance of God. The other Steps can keep most of us sober and somehow functioning. But Step Eleven can keep us growing, if we try hard and work at it continually. Grapevine, June 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Watching what we think Personal Inventory. It's healthy for AA members to confess personal difficulties with destructive thinking. When we find ourselves becoming too irritable or impatient, it's important to admit this in meetings or one-on-one discussions. Usually, just the admission of the problem helps solve it. It's only false pride that makes us think we should be "above" destructive thinking. As human beings, we'll be susceptible to human failings no matter how long we've been sober. If we continue to watch what we think, we'll also be able to head off very serious problem before they get out of control. Far from being a sign that we're not working the program, the practice of weeding out our current faults is the Tenth Step in action. Continuing to take personal inventory and admitting our wrongs are a safeguard against trouble. Destructive thinking is no respecter of persons, and even as an older member, I could lapse into it today. I always have the Tenth Step, however, to get me back on track. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple It is possible to be different and still be right.--Anne Wilson Schaef Each of us is special. In some ways we're all different. It's a good thing too. We'd be bored if we were all the same. Sometimes though, we try to hide the special things about us. We don't want to be "different." But the ways that we're different makes us special. Others have a knack of fixing things. Some of us make beautiful art. Others are great with kids. Our Higher Power made us as different, as unique, as beautiful snowflakes. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me use my special gifts the way You want me to. Help me be thankful that You have given me something special to share with others. Action for the Day: I'll think of one thing about me that's special. I'll talk with my sponsor about it. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Every person is responsible for all the good within the scope of her abilities, and no more . . . --Gail Hamilton We have been given the gift of life. Our recovery validates that fact. Our pleasure with that gift is best expressed by the fullness with which we greet and live life. We need not back off from the invitations our experiences offer. Each one of them gives us a chance, a bit different from all other chances, to fulfill part of our purpose in the lives of others. It has been said that the most prayerful life is the one most actively lived. Full encounter with each moment is evidence of our trust in the now and thus our trust in our higher power. When we fear what may come or worry over what has gone before, we're not trusting in God. Growth in the program will help us remember that fact, thus releasing us to participate more actively in the special circumstances of our lives. When we look around us today, we know that the persons in our midst need our best, and they're not there by accident but by Divine appointment. We can offer them the best we have--acceptance, love, support, our prayers, and we can know that is God's plan for our lives and theirs, I will celebrate my opportunities for goodness today. They'll bless me in turn. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY At the hospital I was separated from alcohol for the last time. Treatment seemed wise, for I showed signs of delirium tremens. There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I admitted for the first time that of myself I was nothing; that without Him I was lost. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. I have not had a drink since. p. 13 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" When I passed out and fell into bed early, I woke up at four or five and had Irish coffee to start the day. I discovered beer was better than orange juice to ease my hangover. Afraid my colleagues or students would smell my breath at work, I was careful to keep my distance. When I got up late and rushed off to the lab, fortified only with coffee, my hands shook so badly it was impossible to weigh out the milligrams of compounds needed for an experiment. When I went out to lunch with another alcoholic, we might never make it back to work that day. pp. 341-342 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." To see how erratic emotions victimized us often took a long time. We could perceive them quickly in others, but only slowly in ourselves. First of all, we had to admit that we had many of these defects, even though such disclosures were painful and humiliating. Where other people were concerned, we had to drop the word "blame" from our speech and thought. This required great willingness even to begin. But once over the first two or three high hurdles, the course ahead began to look easier. For we had started to get perspective on ourselves, which is another way of saying that we were gaining in humility. pp. 47-48 ************************************************** ********* Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When The language of truth is simple. --Czech Proverb "Laughter is by definition healthy." --Doris Lessing As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way. --Ralph Waldo Emerson Your vision will become clear only when You can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes. --Carl Jung "Being quiet does not mean sacrificing productivity." --Jane Nelson ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PERSEVERANCE "Great works are performed, not by strength, but perseverance." -- Samuel Johnson Today I saw a large 200-pound man drunk in a parking lot. Last night I heard a frail mother celebrate ten years of sobriety. The difference? Perseverance. People get what they really want in life. If you want sobriety more than anything else, are prepared to go to any lengths, then nothing will stop you. Perseverance reveals the "walk" as well as the "talk". Today I need to remember that what is worth having requires sacrifice and effort. God helps those who are prepared to help themselves. Today I intend to help myself to sobriety. I pray that I may persevere through my fears towards my goal. ************************************************** ********* Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these. Matthew 19:14 Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. Timothy 4:12 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. Do everything in love. 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you. My love to all of you in Christ Jesus. Amen. 1 Corinthians 16:23-24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you want peace and goodness in your life you must be kind and loving. Lord, may I avoid creating misery so that my life will reflect my love for You. God's blessings never end and His mercies are forever. Lord, may I love others as You love me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today A New Way To Live "When at the end of the road we find that we can no longer function as a human being, either with or without drugs, we all face the same dilemma.... Either go on as best we can to the bitter ends-jails, institutions, or death-or find a new way to live." Basic Text pg. 84 What was the worst aspect of active addiction? For many of us, it wasn't the chance that we might die some day of our disease. The worst part was the living death we experienced every day, the never-ending meaninglessness of life. We felt like walking ghosts, not living, loving parts of the world around us. In recovery, we've come to believe that we're here for a reason: to love ourselves and to love others. In working the Twelve Steps, we have learned to accept ourselves. With that self-acceptance has come self-respect. We have seen that everything we do has an effect on others; we are a part of the lives of those around us, and they of ours. We've begun to trust other people and to acknowledge our responsibility to them. In recovery, we've come back to life. We maintain our new lives by contributing to the welfare of others and seeking each day to do that better - that's where the Tenth, Eleventh, and Twelfth Steps come in. The days of living like a ghost are past, but only so long as we actively seek to be healthy, loving, contributing parts of our own lives and the lives of others around us. Just for today: I have found a new way to live. Today, I will seek to serve others with love and to love myself. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. And the seasons, they go round and round And the painted ponies go up and down We can't return, we can only look Behind from where we came And go round and round and round in the circle game. --Joni Mitchell High in the mountains near Sun Valley, Idaho, is a small cabin. The cabin is always left open for hikers to rest and refresh themselves. There is food in the cabin and wood for a fire. Often, weary backpackers have arrived there, tired and thirsty, to find just the beverage or snack they needed to help them on their way. The cabin operates on a system of trust--if you use something in the cabin, you replace it with something else. Perhaps it is just the thing the next traveler needs to go on. It is a circle game. We are all part of a big circle. If we give of ourselves or do a favor for someone, eventually--sometimes years later--someone will do something for us that will help us on our way. We do these little deeds without expecting to be rewarded, and we can accept others' little gifts without feeling forever in someone's debt. These unselfish acts, stored in our mountain cabin, stand ready for the next traveler. What gift can I pass on to another today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There isn't enough darkness in all the world to snuff out the light of one little candle. --Anonymous Our lives can be like a battle between darkness and light. The darkness might be in our moods when we wake in the morning with feelings of despair. Then we can turn to the light of a prayer for openness: "God help me feel your love and acceptance." The darkness is there when we are tempted to take advantage of a clerk who gives us too much change. Perhaps we tell ourselves, "Everyone does it, it won't matter if I do." Then the light comes as we remember that this program demands rigorous honesty, and each choice for honesty promotes our growth. The darkness may be when someone we care about is hurt or in danger, and we think, "I have to step in to prevent bad things from happening." Then we turn to our Higher Power for strength to stay in the relationship, but not control it. Today, I can take a leap of faith by choosing an action and accepting that one small choice for the light makes a difference - even in all the darkness. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. When action grows unprofitable, gather information; when information grows unprofitable, sleep. --Ursula K. LeGuin Sometimes we need to turn away from what's troubling us. Turn it over, says the Third Step. hanging onto a situation for which no solution is immediately apparent, only exaggerates the situation. It is often said the solution to any problem lies within it. However, turning the problem over and over in our minds keeps our attention on the outer appearance, not the inner solution. Rest, meditation, quiet attention to other matters, other persons, opens the way for God to reveal the solution. Every problem can be resolved. And no answer is ever withheld for long. We need to be open to it, though. We need to step away from our ego, outside of the problem and then listen fully to the words of friends, to the words that rise from our own hearts. Too much thinking, incessant analyzing, will keep any problem a problem. I will rest from my thoughts. I will give my attention wholly to the present. Therein will come the solution, and when least expected. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Good Things Coming Do not worry about how the good that has been planned for you will come. It will come. Do not worry, obsess, and think you have to control it, go out hunting for it, or tangle your mind trying to figure out how and when it will find you. It will find you. Surrender to your Higher Power each day. Trust your Higher Power. Then, stay peaceful. Trust and listen to yourself. That is how the good you want will come to you. Your healing. Your joy. Your relationships. Your solutions. That job. That desired change. That opportunity. It will come to you - naturally, with ease, and in a host of ways. That answer will come. The direction will come. The money. The idea. The energy. The creativity. The path will open itself to you. Trust that, for it has already been planned. It is futile, a waste and drain of energy, to worry about how it will come. It is already there. You have it already. It is in place. You just cannot see it! You will be brought to it, or it will be brought to you. Today, I will relax and trust that the good I need, will find me. Either through my leadings, or the leadings of others, all I want and need will come to me when the time is right. I can handle anything that comes up today... even if it is only a moment at a time. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Practice the Power of Respect It is a quiet power, one that caught me by surprise on my journey. I had heard about it before, but somehow, in the shuffle of life, I had forgotten it: respect. Respect is a spiritual power, a power of the heart, one that’s closely connected to gratitude, yet somehow different. It is an attitude toward people, toward life, toward ourselves that only takes a moment to convey, yet somehow has far-reaching effects. It does more than free people to be themselves, it encourages them to be their best. It honors people, life, and the mysterious connection we each have to the Divine. Have a series of life experiences caused you to forget respect? In your anger, did you decide that certain persons or groups of people were undeserving of respect? Has familiarity with yourself or another caused you to forget to practice respect? Let go of the past; it’s over. But your power to transform the future has just begun. Respect and honor yourself. Respect the needs of your body, the needs of your heart, and the dictates of your soul. Respect the lives of others. Respect the gift of life. Bow in spirit to all you meet. Bow to the gifts of the universe– the sun, moon, earth, sea, and stars. Honor all that lives, the trees, the wildflowers, the eagle soaring high. The deer in the woods, the squirrel scurrying up the tree, the june bug that lights on your shoulder. Each has its place in this world. So do you. Discover the power of respect. Then practice it often. let it change your world. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Say how sweet it is There’s so much talk about finding that extraordinary love of our life. Maybe everything we need to know about romantic love can be learned from our friends. We don’t expect our friends to change our life and make everything that’s wrong,right. We just expect them to be who they are, and then we let them be that. It’s part of being a friend. We don’t expect to like everything about our friends. We know they have defects of character. They do things occasionally that irritate us. We don’t expect our friends to entertain and amuse us, keeping us laughing and smiling all the time. We let them go through their ups and downs. Sometimes we just sit in silence with our friends, and we each keep our thoughts to ourselves. We don’t pick fights and create drama with our friends, just to keep passion alive. Usually we do everything we can to avoid fighting with our friends. We want our friendship to be a quiet, safe, peaceful place, a haven in our lives. We don’t expect our friends to turn our lives upside down, distracting us from our path. Usually if a friend attempts to wreak havoc in our lives, we run the other way. We wouldn’t let a friend hit us. And friends don’t talk mean. If an issue comes up, we usually carefully weigh the best way to talk about this issue with her or him. We don’t expect friends to be in perfect health all the time. We know that they will have issues to deal with as they walk along their own paths. We encourage them. We pray for them. But we don’t take their issues as our own, and we don’t take it personally when they need some time to focus on their own personal growth. In friendships, one person does not hold all the power. So despite the differences in our lives, we try to relate as equals. We’re tolerant of cycles in our friendships, knowing that at different times, each person has different needs, different experiences to go through. Sometimes there’s more time and energy to devote to the friendships. Other times, there’s less. We don’t expect our friends to be at our side twenty-four hours a day. We have our time together and value that, but then we each go our own way. We don’t try to force bonding with friends, or even force the relationship to be a friendship too fast. We let ourselves go through experiences together naturally, knowing that that’s how bonding takes place. I’m not a expert on marital love, but we might have a better chance at finding love if we treated our lover like a friend. God, help me find the middle ground between unrealistic expectations and no expectations at all. Help me cherish my relationships and not confuse heavy drama with romantic love. *************************************** Conditioned Response Reactions To Life Events Our experiences color everything. The events of the past can have a profound effect on how we see our lives now and what we choose to believe about our world. Our past experiences can also influence our emotional reactions and responses to present events. Each of us reacts to stimulus based on what we have learned in life. There is no right or wrong to it; it is simply the result of past experience. Later, when our strong feelings have passed, we may be surprised at our reactions. Yet when we face a similar situation, again our reactions may be the same. When we understand those experiences, we can come that much closer to understanding our reactions and consciously change them. Between stimulus and reaction exists a fleeting moment of thought. Often, that thought is based on something that has happened to you in the past. When presented with a similar situation later on, your natural impulse is to unconsciously regard it in a similar light. For example, if you survived a traumatic automobile accident as a youngster, the first thing you might feel upon witnessing even a minor collision between vehicles may be intense panic. If you harbor unpleasant associations with death from a past experience, you may find yourself unable to think about death as a gentle release or the next step toward a new kind of existence. You can, however, minimize the intensity of your reactions by identifying the momentary thought that inspires your reaction. Then, next time, replace that thought with a more positive one. Modifying your reaction by modifying your thoughts is difficult, but it can help you to see and experience formerly unpleasant situations in a whole new light. It allows you to stop reacting unconsciously. Learning the reason of your reactions may also help you put aside a negative reaction long enough to respond in more positive and empowered ways. Your reactions and responses then become about what’s happening in the present moment rather than about the past. As time passes, your negative thoughts may lose strength, leaving only your positive thoughts to inform your healthy reactions. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Through our own experiences and the experiences of others in The Program, we see that a spiritual awakening is in reality a gift — a gift which in essence is a new state of consciousness and being. It means that I’m now on a road which really leads somewhere; it means that life is really worth living, rather than something to be endured. It means that I have been transformed in a sense that I have undergone a basic personality change — and that I possess a source of strength which I had so long denied myself. Do I believe that none come too soon to The Program — and that none return too late? Today I Pray I pray that I may attain that state of consciousness which transcends my everyday reality — but is also a part of it. May I no longer question the existence of God because I have touched His Being. For us who are recovering from addictions, the words reborn in the Spirit have a special, precious meaning. May I be wholly grateful to a Higher Power for leading me to a spiritual rebirth. Today I Will Remember Renaissance through my Higher Power. *************************************** One More Day What’s a joy to the one is a nightware to the other. That’s how it is today, that’s how it will be forever. – Bertolt Brecht Different stroke for different folks is a popular cliche, but it’s also an absolute truth which it comes to knowing people. Each of us has our own level of comfort for the activities we do and the performances we give in our lives. we also find different levels of joy in our spiritual, social, and emotional experiences. Often, we find what we’re looking for — what we wish to find — in each situation. What’s most important is that we are able to find our own level of joy — wherever we are at that time — and claim it as belonging to us. My joy may not be the same as someone Else’s joy, but I shall struggle on to keep the meaning of my joy alive. ************************************ Food For Thought Daring What is it inside our heads that keeps daring us to try once more to prove that we are not compulsive overeaters? What kind of stupidity makes us think that this time we can get away with taking one compulsive bite? In a moment of blind bravado, we can lose months or years of hard won control. Our ego is our own worst enemy. We forget that once a compulsive overeater, always a compulsive overeater. We tell ourselves that since we have been doing so well for so long, surely we can manage one or two small deviations. We rebel against the program and place ourselves above it. We forget that we have a disease, and we decide to do what we feel like doing, oblivious to the fact that by taking that first compulsive bite we are destroying our sanity and our serenity. This kind of daring is to be avoided at all costs. The best antidote is the humility, which reminds us of the reality of our illness. We are not like everyone else. We are compulsive overeaters and do not dare to throw away our program. Save me from the kind of daring that destroys me. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ RISING ABOVE ~ Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail. Ralph Waldo Emerson One of the major premises of our recovery program is "progress, not perfection." No one but me expects me to be perfect. I have a history of driving myself in the quest for perfection. I've set goals that are so lofty that I could never acheive them. In that respect, I'm probably my own worst enemy. However, I can also be my own best friend. I don't have to set standards that are impossible for me to meet. In fact, we're told we need to live one day at a time. If I can do that, then I don't need to live up to my impossibly high standards. My goals aren't so out-of-reach if I can see them as daily things. What happens if I fail to meet even the "one day at a time" goal? I start over, knowing that I don't have to stay down. I can rise up and begin again. That, for me, is the greatest thing. One Day at a Time . . . I will rise above my failures and shortcomings, and know that I'm making progress. I don't have to be perfect any more. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us. - Pg. 164 - A Vision For You Hour To Hour - Book - Quote HALT. Don't get too Hungry, too Angry, too Lonely, too Tired. Why? Because any of these conditions weaken our mind and emotions and in a weakened state our disease of addiction can easily trick us into using some mind-affecting chemical. Higher Power, as I understand You, help me understand the dangers of HALT. Staying in the Game Each and every day is a rebirth into an entirely new set of possibilities. It carries with it a sense of renewal. Each and every day I will play the hand I'm dealt as well as I can play it. Each and every day I will wake up, place my hand in the hand of God and move into my day with the confidence and comfort of knowing that I am not alone, that I have access to the greatest source of compassion and power in the universe. Each and every day I will put one foot in front of the other and try to make sense of the life I have been given. I will have faith - I will stay connected and alive while I'm living. I am an active member of my life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Some program members get stuck on rules of what one can and can't say and what dependency qualifies one to be in what recovery group. They demand that newcomers follow traditions as interpreted by them. This can drive newcomers away before they even find out what recovery means. I carry the message, not the mess. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The trouble with many of us is that in trying times we stop trying. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I can handle anything that comes up today even if it is only a moment at a time. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote There are no chemical solutions to spiritual problems. - Ron K.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-15-2024, 04:19 AM | #23 |
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Posts: 74,304
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December 23
Daily Reflections RECOVERY, UNITY, SERVICE Our Twelfth Step - carrying the message - is the basic service that AA's Fellowship gives; this is our principal aim and the main reason for our existence. THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 160 I thank God for those who came before me, those who told me not to forget the Three Legacies: Recovery, Unity and Service. In my home group, the Three Legacies were described on a sign which said: "You take a three-legged stool, try to balance it on only one leg, or two. Our Three Legacies must be kept intact. In Recovery, we get sober together; in Unity, we work together for the good of our Steps and Traditions; and through Service - we give away freely what has been given to us." One of the chief gifts of my life has been to know that I will have no message to give, unless I recover in unity with A.A. principles. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We have definitely left that dream world behind. It was only a sham. It was a world of our own making and it was not the real world. We are sorry for the past, yes, but we learned a lot from it. We can put it down to experience, as we see it now, because it has given us the knowledge necessary to face the world as it really is. We had to become alcoholics in order to find the A.A. program. We would not have got it any other way. In a way, it was worth it. Do I look at my past as valuable experience? Meditation For The Day Shed peace, not discord, wherever you go. Try to be part of the cure of every situation, not part of the problem. Try to ignore evil, rather than to actively combat it. Always try to build up, never to tear down. Show others by your example that happiness comes from living the right way. The power of your example is greater than the power of what you say. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may try to bring something good into every situation today. I pray that I may be constructive in the way I think and speak and act today. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Fear And Faith, p.263 The achievement of freedom from fear is a lifetime undertaking, one that can never be wholly completed. When under heavy attack, acute illness, or in other conditions of serious insecurity, we shall all react to this emotion--well or badly, as the case may be. Only the self-deceived will claim perfect freedom from fear. ******************************** We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up. Sometimes we had to search persistently, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. 1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.55 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places AA goes the Distance Fortitude Few societies or organizations have better ways of measuring success than AA. Since we are friends as well as recovering people, some of us get to know others fairly well over long periods of time. Even in a large city, we meet people again and again, year after year. We've come to think it very commonplace that some individuals have been sober ten years or more, and that some members have been in the fellowship more than forty years. The AA program does have staying power; it goes the distance for those who continue to follow it. We should remind ourselves of this when we hear of new, faddish theories about alcoholism and recovery. Most of the time, the results reported are very short-term. What we really need is recovery with staying power, which we can find in the AA program. Today's sobriety can be another link in an endless chain of sobriety. AA will go the distance for me if I take care of each day as it comes. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We not only need to be willing to give, but also to be open to receiving from others.---from On Hope Many of us took so much from others during our addiction that now we may not want to ask for anything. We may be afraid to ask for help, so our needs go unmet. In fact, many of us would rather give than receive. In recovery, we need to understand the difference between taking and receiving. Giving to others is important. So is receiving from others. As we grow spiritually, we learn to accept gifts. The gift of sobriety teaches us this. We need to accept the gifts the world gives us without shame. We are entitled. God loves us and will give us much if we're willing to receive it. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be receptive to Your gifts. Help me see and believe that I'm entitled to all the happiness of the world. Action for the Day: I'll think of what a friend has given me. I'll thank this friend. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . The present enshrines the past. --Simone de Beauvoir Each of our lives is a multitude of interconnecting pieces, not unlike a mosaic. What has gone before, what will come today, are at once and always entwined. The past has done its part, never to be erased. The present is always a composite. In months and years gone by, perhaps we anticipated the days with dread. Fearing the worst, often we found it; we generally find that which we fear. But we can influence the mosaic our experiences create. The contribution today makes to our mosaic can lighten its shade, can heighten its contrast, and can make bold its design. What faces us today? A job we enjoy or one we fear? Growing pains of our children? Loneliness? How we move through the minutes, the hours, influences our perception of future minutes and hours. No moment is inviolate. Every moment is part of the whole that we are creating. We are artists. We create our present from influences of our past. I will go forth today; I will anticipate goodness. I will create the kind of moments that will add beauty to my mosaic. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My schoolmate visited me, and I fully acquainted him with my problems and deficiencies. We made a list of people I had hurt or toward whom I felt resentment. I expressed my entire willingness to approach these individuals, admitting my wrong. Never was I to be critical of them. I was to right all such matters to the utmost of my ability. p. 13 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" Somehow I still managed to keep my job and most of my friends, social drinkers who were urging me to cut down on the alcohol. That counsel only made me mad, but I was concerned myself. I asked the therapist I was seeing, sometimes with beer in hand, would I have to stop? His answer was that we had to find out why I drank. I'd already tried but was never able to find out why until I learned the answer in A.A.--because I'm an alcoholic. p. 342 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Of course the depressive and the power-driver are personality extremes, types with which A.A. and the whole world abound. Often these personalities are just as sharply defined as the examples given. But just as often some of us will fit more or less into both classifications. Human beings are never quite alike, so each of us, when making an inventory, will need to determine what his individual character defects are. Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into them and walk with new confidence that he is at last on the right track. p. 48 ************************************************** ********* "The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless." --Hosea Ballou Speaking without thinking is shooting without aiming. --French Proverb Don't let your tongue cut your throat. --Irish Proverb As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way. --Ralph Waldo Emerson When you find you are upset over a situation, stop and ask yourself one very important question. "Is this something I can change?" Whether it is or not, turn your negative energy in to productive energy. You can either change the situation, or change your perspective of the situation. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LANGUAGE "If thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought." -- George Orwell Sobriety for me means much more than "not drinking" or "not using" --- it means the daily decision to be a positive and creative human being in all areas of my life: How I treat people. What I eat. The books I read and how I speak! Not even my worst enemy would call me a "prude" but I think that bad language used on a regular basis is unacceptable in sobriety. Why? Because it hurts the listener and does not show respect for self or the God-given gift of communication. If you have no respect for language, you will ultimately not grow as a spiritual person. May Your "words of love" be reflected in my speech and writings. ************************************************** ********* To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O my God. Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. Psalms 25:1-2 Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalms 25:4-5 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Each time you have a kind thought, say a kind word or do a kind deed you are living your love. Lord, as I see the world through loving eyes, I experience heaven on earth. Get and keep a good humored attitude toward life. This will bring you support rather than opposition. Lord, may I always be a peacemaker. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today New Ideas "We reevaluate our ideas so we can become acquainted with the new ideas that lead to a new way of life." Basic Text, pg. 91 Learning to live a new way of life can be difficult. Sometimes, when the going gets especially hard, we're tempted to follow the path of least resistance and live by our old ideas again. We forget that our old ideas were killing us. To live a new way of life, we need to open our minds to new ideas. Working the steps, attending meetings, sharing with others, trusting a sponsor - these suggestions may meet our resistance, even our rebellion. The NA program requires effort, but each step in the program brings us closer to becoming the kinds of people we truly want to be. We want to change, to grow to become something more than we are today. To do that, we open our mind, try on the new ideas we've found in NA, and learn to live a new way of life. Just for today: I will open my mind to new ideas and learn to live my life in a new way. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There are no riches above a sound body, and no joy above the joy of the heart. --Anonymous Holidays are a wonderful and exciting time of year--a time to enjoy snowflakes falling, company coming, and presents. Sometimes we find ourselves concentrating solely on the wrapped presents and forgetting about the presents of the heart. With God's help, we can begin to notice such things as the hug from a brother or sister, the laugh of a grandparent or the hand-drawn card given to us by a friend. All of these wonderful presents and more are ours for the taking; we need only to see beyond the wrapped packages. It is then we will fully experience the joys of the heart. How many gifts do I see around me right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Loneliness is the way by which destiny endeavors to lead man to himself. --Hermann Hissed We have an epidemic of loneliness among men in our world. Everywhere, men are walking around as though in plastic bubbles that prevent contact with others. We are cut off from closeness with our brothers and sisters, our own children, our mates, coworkers, and neighbors. We have learned to play the role, be efficient, and look good. Do we dare let others know how we feel? Will they look down on us? Will they think we're strange? All this has made us ripe for the diseases of addiction and codependency. Some of us have romanticized the pain of loneliness and glorified it. We sought some comfort for our pain, but we only perpetuated it. Breaking through the barrier to let someone know us can be incredibly difficult. Yet, just to say "I feel lonely" to another person makes us slightly less alone. Going to meetings and working this program provide a way out. The greatest benefits of the program for many of us have been recovery from loneliness and the genuine relationships we have developed. Today, I will reveal some of my feelings to another person. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . The present enshrines the past. --Simone de Beauvoir Each of our lives is a multitude of interconnecting pieces, not unlike a mosaic. What has gone before, what will come today, are at once and always entwined. The past has done its part, never to be erased. The present is always a composite. In months and years gone by, perhaps we anticipated the days with dread. Fearing the worst, often we found it; we generally find that which we fear. But we can influence the mosaic our experiences create. The contribution today makes to our mosaic can lighten its shade, can heighten its contrast, and can make bold its design. What faces us today? A job we enjoy or one we fear? Growing pains of our children? Loneliness? How we move through the minutes, the hours, influences our perception of future minutes and hours. No moment is inviolate. Every moment is part of the whole that we are creating. We are artists. We create our present from influences of our past. I will go forth today; I will anticipate goodness. I will create the kind of moments that will add beauty to my mosaic. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Holiday Triggers One year, when I was a child, my father got drunk and violent at Christmas. I had just unwrapped a present, a bottle of hand lotion, when he exploded in an alcoholic rage. Our Christmas was disrupted. It was terrible. It was frightening for the whole family. Now, thirty-five years later, whenever I smell hand lotion, I immediately feel all the feelings I did that Christmas: the fear, the disappointment, the heartache, the helplessness, and an instinctive desire to control. --Anonymous There are many positive triggers that remind us of Christmas: snow, decorations, "Silent Night," "Jingle Bells," wrapped packages, a nativity scene, stockings hung on a fireplace. These "triggers" can evoke in us the warm, nostalgic feelings of the Christmas celebration. There are other kinds of triggers, though, that may be less apparent and evoke different feelings and memories. Our mind is like a powerful computer. It links sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste with feelings, thoughts, and memories. It links our senses - and we remember. Sometimes the smallest, most innocuous incident can trigger memories. Not all our memories are pleasant, especially if we grew up in an alcoholic, dysfunctional setting. We may not understand why we suddenly feel afraid, depressed, and anxious. We may not understand what has triggered our codependent coping behaviors - the low self worth, the need to control, the need to neglect ourselves. When that happens, we need to understand that some innocuous event may be triggering memories recorded deep within us. If something, even something we don't understand, triggers painful memories, we can pull ourselves back into the present by self care: acknowledging our feelings, detaching, working the Steps, and affirming ourselves. We can take action to feel good. We can help ourselves feel better each Christmas. No matter what the past held, we can put it in perspective, and create a more pleasant holiday today. Today, I will gently work through my memories of this holiday season. I will accept my feelings, even if I consider them different than what others are feeling this holiday. God, help me let go, heal from, and release the painful memories surrounding the holidays. Help me finish my business from the past, so I can create the holiday of my choice. As I start this day with quiet meditation, I feel myself becoming still and at peace. At anytime during the day I can bring my mind back to this moment. I can bring my attention and awareness back to the peace that I have when I am with my breath and I know that my breath is with me at all times, whether I remember it or not. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Bring Your Healing Gifts to Others Let your healing gifts to the world spring naturally from who you really are. You want to be a healer. You want to be a force for good in this world. Many of us believe deeply in healing, service, and love. But until you know what heals and helps you, what the truth is for you, you won’t know what heals and helps others. True service, healing that touches the hearts and souls of men and women, doesn’t happen when we ignore who we are. It doesn’t happen when we try to be who we think we should be or when we pretend, out of fear, that we’re someone we’re not. The ability to bring healing to others can only come when we genuinely accept and love ourselves, past and present, and are vulnerable enough to be honest about what heals and helps us. When we love and accept ourselves, we will love and accept others. And only from that place of acceptance can true healing spring. Love yourself. Accept yourself. Be honest about what heals and helps you. Then you’ll bring your healing gifts to others. Your life will be a gift to the world. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go How sweet and precious the moments It had seemed like such an ordinary time. He was staying at the house, helping me out. I had funeral arrangements to make and to attend. My mother was coming into town. I had a lot to do. Then the busy days and nights settled into the quiet rhythm of California winters– short days, fires in the fireplace at night, a pot of spagetti sauce on the stove. January at the beach was a time to stay in the house and be quiet and cozy. Sometimes he cooked a wonderful dinner– Philly steak sandwhiches with real melted cream cheese. Other times, we ordered pizza and just ate in. Sometimes I read. Other times I talked on the phone or puttered around the house. At night, right before sleep came, bringing a gentle end to another day, he put a Sarah McLaughlin CD on the stereo. She sang about being in the arms of angels as she gently sang me to sleep. Then the day came. He was ready to leave. Our time together was done. So be it, I thought. What comes around doesn’t come to stay. It always comes to pass. As he walked out the door, I waved good-bye. Then a wave of emotions rushed through me, flooding my heart. It had seemed like such an ordinary time. And it was. But until it was over, until he walked out that door, I didn’t know how rich and beautiful the ordinary was. “Hmm,” I thought, watching him leave. Maybe the time hasn’t passed yet. How sweet and precious are the moments of our lives, especially the ordinary ones. Don’t let them pass unnoticed or unexperienced. Those ordinary moments can easily become the richest part of our lives. God, help me remember that the way to live a life filled with wonder and awe is to surrender to and live each moment fully, expecting and allowing each one to simply be what it is. *************************************** Five Actions Panchakarma "Panchakarma," a sanskrit word meaning "five actions," describes a series of gentle, natural therapies that boost the body’s ability to detoxify and rejuvenate. As an essential part of Ayurveda, India’s ancient holistic system of medicine, it is used to maintain the body’s balance to prevent illness or as the first step in holistic treatment. Panchakarma’s incredible purification improves healing throughout the body, mind, and spirit, clearing the way for the body’s healing intelligence to flow freely. Today, an oil massage, steam baths, and a special diet prepare your body for several days of relaxing, healing therapies at a spa-like medical clinic. A precise sequence of soothing treatments is then applied in such a way that brainwaves are stimulated and synchronized, creating deep relaxation and an expanded state of consciousness. At the same time, herbal therapies help flush toxins from the body’s systems and tissues while massage soothes the body and balances its energy. Profoundly rejuvenating, Panchakarma can increase energy and mental clarity. It has even been known to slow the aging process and heal diseases previously thought to be incurable according to Western medicine. Depending on the needs of the particular individual, a series of five basic therapies are used: Vaman purges toxins from the sinuses, lungs, and stomach; Virechan flushes toxins from the small intestine; Vasti removes toxins from the colon; Nasyam is herbal therapy applied through the nose for head and sinus conditions. The fifth therapy can be one of three methods: Rakta Moksham removes the excess toxins in the bloodstream, while Shiro Dhara uses a hot-oil head massage. A second form of Vasti can also be applied. Along with a relief of symptoms and improvements in physical disorders, many people, after experiencing Panchakarma, feel lighter, more energized, and look younger. The body’s ability to heal itself is deeply enhanced with the techniques of Panchakarma. By embracing its methods, we eliminate obstacles to complete balance in our bodies and allow the powerful flow of our healing energy to restore our health, our natural glow, and our zest for life. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day How can I tell if I have had a spiritual awakening? For many of us in The Program, a spiritual awakening manifest itself in simple rather than complicated evidences: emotional maturity; an end to constant and soul churning resentments; the ability to love and be loved in return; the belief, even without understanding, that something lets the sun rise and set, brings forth and ends life, and gives joy to human hearts. Am I now able to do, feel and believe that which I could not previously do through my own unaided strength and resources alone? Today I Pray May my spiritual confidence begin to spread over my attitudes towards others — especially during holiday times, when anticipations and anxieties are high. As an addictive person, I have not handled holidays well — greeting those who gather at home, missing those who are not here. I pray for serenity to cope with the holiday brew of emotions. Today I Will Remember Spirit without “spirits.” Cheer without “cheer.” *************************************** One More Day It is a great piece of skill to know how to guide your luck even while waiting for it. – Balstar Gracian Manipulation sounds like such a harsh word, but consider the hands of a surgeon, the moves of an artist, the skill of an electrician. They manipulate their physical environment. In doing so, they are creating. In some subtle way — perhaps we are not even aware that we are doing it — we learn to manipulate our lives. We, too, are very creative. Some people are able to reach for positive goals, even during seemingly negative times. These people are capable of scooping out the very best of life. Those are the ones who have learned to delicate art of helping themselves. They can create their own luck. Sometimes luck isn’t always caused by a draw of the cards. I work hard in all areas to improve my lot, to improve my relationships, to improve my life. ************************************ Food For Thought Warning: Danger Ahead After we have lived the OA program for a time, it becomes a part of our deepest self. When a thought or impulse arises which threatens our program, we often feel a twinge of fear at the same time. This feeling of fear is a warning that whatever we are contemplating may be hazardous to our health. Not to heed these warning signals is the height of folly. We have learned from sad experience that certain thoughts and actions are not for us, if we want to maintain our abstinence and our sanity. When confronted with a difficult choice, we need to listen carefully for the small voice of conscience, which warns us of disaster ahead if we choose foolishly. Our Higher Power never allows us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand the temptation, provided we recognize our need for His saving strength. By paying attention to the small warning twinges of fear, we can avoid thoughts and actions, which go against His, will for us. May I heed the danger signals You send. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FEAR ~ When thinking won't cure fear, action will. W. Clement Stone When I first came into the program, I was told that I couldn't think my way into positive actions, but I could act my way into positive thinking. I learned that this was a simple program of action; that if I wanted what you had, I had to do what you did. None of these clichés made any sense to me; I would have to think these over. The nerve of these people telling me that they would do my thinking for me, that all I had to do was follow directions! They prodded and badgered me into working the Steps out of real love and knowledge of truth. I realize now that my actions demonstrated to God my desire to change, and He gave me the courage to try living another way. Most importantly, though, He gave me you. One Day at a Time . . . Am I going to "keep on the firing line" or rest on my laurels? Jeremiah ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: 'Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.' Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The first few 24 hours are the hardest task we will ever have to complete. The cravings are intensive, the Babbler put-downs are overwhelming, our bodies feel like a dirty sneaker. Sometimes we simply have to hold on. God, as I understand You, be with me now. Always Here Today I recover the spirit that has always been there, vibrating just beneath the surface of my being, the membrane of my life. I am whole and in tact. I call to that part of me that has been waiting patiently for me to come to my senses and claim it. That part of me that is eternal, that never dies. Spirit has been with me even in my darkest hours. I turn and look, I quiet my mind and see, I rest in awareness and experience. Spirit has never been far, but I have been asleep. Today I wake up to spirit. I am alive to life - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote There is nothing about you that was not intended to be. You have an incredibly sacred purpose. I am on purpose. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you don't remember what God did for you yesterday, you'll have trouble trusting Him for today. Time for Joy - Book - Quote As I start this day with quiet meditation, I feel myself becoming still and at peace. At anytime during the day I can bring my mind back to this moment. I can bring my attention and awareness back to the peace that I have when I am with my breath and I know that my breath is with me at all times, whether I remember it or not. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If I point the finger at anyone, I have three pointing right back at me. - Unknown origin.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-15-2024, 04:29 AM | #24 |
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December 24
Daily Reflections A "SANE AND HAPPY USEFULNESS" We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 130 All the prayer and meditation in the world will not help me unless they are accompanied by action. Practicing the principles in all my affairs shows me the care that God takes in all parts of my life. God appears in my world when I move aside, and allow Him to step into it. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day We have been given a new life, just because we happened to become alcoholics. We certainly don't deserve the new life that has been given us. There is little in our past to warrant the life we have now. Many people live good lives from their youth on, not getting into serious trouble, being well adjusted to life, and yet they have not found all that we drunks have found. We had the good fortune to find Alcoholics Anonymous and with it a new life. We are among the lucky few in the world who have learned a new way of life. Am I deeply grateful for the new life that I have learned in A.A.? Meditation For The Day A deep gratitude to the Higher Power for all the blessings which we have and which we don't deserve has come to us. We thank God and mean it. Then comes service to our fellow men, out of gratitude for what we have received. This entails some sacrifice of ourselves and our own affairs. But we are glad to do it. Gratitude, service, and then sacrifice are the steps that lead to good A.A. work. They open the door to a new life for us. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may gladly serve others, out of deep gratitude for what I have received. I pray that I may keep a deep sense of obligation. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Individual Responsibilities, p.262 Let us emphasize that our reluctance to fight one another, or anybody else, is not counted as some special virtue which entitles us A.A.'s to feel superior to other people. Nor does this reluctance mean that the members of A.A. are going to back away from their individual responsibilities as citizens. Here they should feel free to act as they see the right upon the public issues of our times. But when it comes to A.A. as a whole, that's quite a different matter. As a group we do not enter into public controversy, because we are sure that our Society will perish if we do. 12 & 12, p.177 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Jealousy toward loved ones Feeling Though resentment gets more attention in AA than jealousy, both of these ugly emotions can plague us in sobriety. Some of us can be very distressed and ashamed when the green demon of jealousy suddenly assaults us. Does this mean we're not working our program? No, because the purpose of our program is to bring honesty and healing into our lives, not denial of basic human emotions. It's very understandable that we have pangs of jealousy even in sobriety. Quite often, this jealousy will be felt toward loved ones and close friends. One young AA father disclosed he was jealous of his wife when their infant son seemed more responsive to her than to him. We can also experience jealousy when others close to us receive things we'd like to have. It's even possible to be jealous of another's standing in AA. When such feelings arise, we always have the answer: We must discuss our feelings with certain AA friends and turn these problems over to our Higher Power. This, not denial, is always the solution. If the green demon of envy and jealousy arises today, I'll let the healing power of the Twelve Steps go to work on it. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We must all hang together or we will hang separately.---Ben Franklin We didn't get ourselves sober. And we don't keep ourselves sober. Our program does this. That is why the Twelfth Step is important. We must be willing to give service to our program whenever it's needed. When a friend calls and say he or she feels like using, we don't say we're sorry. We get our friend and take him or her to a meeting. Our survival depends on this kind of action. We are to carry the message. We carry the message by deeds, not words. We are part of a fellowship based on action. A fellowship guided by love. It is not words that keep us sober--it is action. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be ready whenever there's a need. Help me be ready to put my self-will aside. Give me strength. Action for the Day: I will think of my group members. Who could use a supportive call or visit? I will call or visit those who need my help. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Follow your dream . . if you stumble, don't stop and lose sight of your goal, press on to the top. For only on top Can we see the whole view . . . --Amanda Bradley Today, we can, each of us, look back on our lives and get a glimmering of why something happened and how it fit into the larger mosaic of our lives. And this will continue to be true for us. We have stumbled. We will stumble. And we learn about ourselves, about what makes us stumble and about the methods of picking ourselves up. Life is a process, a learning process that needs those stumbles to increase our awareness of the steps we need to take to find our dream at the top. None of us could realize the part our stumbling played in the past. But now we see. When we fall, we need to trust that, as before, our falls are "up," not down. I will see the whole view in time. I see part of it daily. My mosaic is right and good and needs my stumbles. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY I was to test my thinking by the new God-consciousness within. Common sense would thus become uncommon sense. I was to sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others. Then only might I expect to receive. But that would be in great measure. p. 13 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" With my attempts to cut down, I stopped keeping alcohol around the house, drank up whatever was there, over and over deciding not to get more. Then on the way home after work or an evening out, I'd have to see if I could scrape together enough money for a bottle. There were liquor stores just about every block, and I rotated them so the salesmen wouldn't know how much I drank. On Sundays when the liquor stores were closed, I had to make do with beer or hard cider from the grocery. p. 342 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Now let's ponder the need for a list of the more glaring personality defects all of us have in varying degrees. To those having religious training, such a list would set forth serious violations of moral principles. Some others will think of this list as defects of character. Still others will call it an index of maladjustments. Some will become quite annoyed if there is talk about immorality, let alone sin. But all who are in the least reasonable will agree upon one point: that there is plenty wrong with us alcoholics about which plenty will have to be done if we are to expect sobriety, progress, and any real ability to cope with life. p. 48 ************************************************** ********* Sharing our experiences with other people gives them hope. --unknown What I am is God's gift to me. What I make of myself is my gift to Him. --unknown "An apology is the superglue of life: it can repair just about anything." --Unknown A man's true wealth is the good he does in the world. Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror. But you are eternity and you are the mirror. --Kahlil Gibran "Joy is not in things; It is in us" --Richard Wagner "Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect." --Oren Arnold "At this time of the year, we need to remind ourselves that what we give from deep within has a much greater worth than what we give from our wallets. Some attempt to impress others with their contributions, but the real acts of kindness are when we give our time, our talents, and gifts that are a reflection of our hearts. -*Neil Eskelinn ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BROTHERHOOD "I am a citizen, not of Athens or Greece, but of the world." -- Socrates My recovery has enabled me to see that I belong; I belong not simply to a race or nation but to the world. The freedom experienced in my recovery enables me to embrace different cultures, races and religions. Spirituality has brought harmony into my life. Today I can go where I please. I can learn languages and communicate with people in foreign lands. I can listen to ideas and philosophies that enrich God "as I understand Him". The healing that I have experienced in my recovery is more than discovering my choice around alcohol, it is discovering my choice around life. Today I am not content to exist in my life, I choose to live it. Welcome to my world! May I always choose to see and appreciate the richness of my life. ************************************************** ********* He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful for those who keep the demands of his covenant. Psalm 25 9-10 "Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration As you draw closer and closer to God, you won't have to tell anyone because it will show in your face. Lord, teach me Your ways as I am ready and let Your love and peace flow through me even in my difficult moments. When you live in the spirit of God you will always feel the love within you. Lord, may I seek peace in You and not from the outside world. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Group "The Twelfth Step of our personal program also says that we carry the message to the addict who still suffers.... The group is the most powerful vehicle we have for carrying the message." Basic Text pg. 65 When we first come to Narcotics Anonymous meetings, we meet recovering addicts. We know they are addicts because they talk about the same experiences and feelings we've had. We know they are recovering because of their serenity - they've got something we want. We feel hope when other addicts share their recovery with us in NA meetings. The atmosphere of recovery attracts us to the meetings. That atmosphere is created when group members make a commitment to work together. We try to enhance the atmosphere of recovery by helping set up for meetings, greeting newcomers, and talking with other addicts after the meeting. These demonstrations of our commitment make our meetings attractive and help our groups share their recovery. Sharing experience in meetings is one way in which we help one another, and it's often the foundation for our sense of belonging. We identify with other addicts, so we trust their message of hope. Many of us would not have stayed in Narcotics Anonymous without that sense of belonging and hope. When we share at group meetings, we support our personal recovery while helping others. Just for today: I will reach out to another addict in my group and share my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. He is Father. Even more, God is Mother, who does not want to harm us. --Pope John Paul I God is many things to different people. Some call God "Father," others "Mother," still others "Higher Power," "Inner Light," "Deeper Self," and "Supreme Being." It doesn't matter what name we use. No one name is ever fully adequate, and each of us has our own private way of trying to understand that which we can't ever understand fully. We give God names which attempt to express what God means to us personally, what God does for us as individuals, and how we see ourselves in relation to God. Could it also be true that other people can't be labelled and put into one box? Doing so limits them to one particular way of being understood, and it limits the ways we can get to know them. If we are all made in God's image, then we all deserve the freedom to be seen differently by different people. How does God look to me today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Celebration is a forgetting in order to remember. A forgetting of ego, of problems, of difficulties. A letting go. --Matthew Fox A holiday presents us men with an opportunity to practice the letting go of this program. This is a special day to set aside our work and our routines, to put our problems and burdens on the shelf. Let us join with others who are also letting go on this day and celebrate. Maybe we can learn from them how they do it. We may have been too compulsive on past holidays to celebrate. Or perhaps our holidays are clouded with painful memories. We might miss loved ones or we may recall disappointments or the chaos of earlier holidays. There is no need for perfection in our celebration. We can have some tension, or pain, and yet set it aside as we join with others for a special day. Today, I will set my ego aside and let go of the usual things in my life in order to reach out to others and participate in celebration. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Follow your dream . . if you stumble, don't stop and lose sight of your goal, press on to the top. For only on top Can we see the whole view . . . --Amanda Bradley Today, we can, each of us, look back on our lives and get a glimmering of why something happened and how it fit into the larger mosaic of our lives. And this will continue to be true for us. We have stumbled. We will stumble. And we learn about ourselves, about what makes us stumble and about the methods of picking ourselves up. Life is a process, a learning process that needs those stumbles to increase our awareness of the steps we need to take to find our dream at the top. None of us could realize the part our stumbling played in the past. But now we see. When we fall, we need to trust that, as before, our falls are "up," not down. I will see the whole view in time. I see part of it daily. My mosaic is right and good and needs my stumbles. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Getting Through the Holidays For some, the sights, signs, and smells of the holidays bring joy and a warm feeling. But, while others are joyously diving into the season, some of us are dipping into conflict, guilt, and a sense of loss. We read articles on how to enjoy the holidays, we read about the Christmas blues, but many of us still can't figure out how to get through the holiday season. We may not know what a joyous holiday would look and feel like. Many of us are torn between what we want to do on the holiday, and what we feel we have to do. We may feel guilty because we don't want to be with our families. We may feel a sense of loss because we don't have the kind of family to be with that we want. Many of us, year after year, walk into the same dining room on the same holiday, expecting this year to be different. Then we leave, year after year, feeling let down, disappointed, and confused by it all. Many of us have old, painful memories triggered by the holidays. Many of us feel a great deal of relief when the holiday is ended. One of the greatest gifts of recovery is learning that we are not alone. There are probably as many of us in conflict during the holidays than there are those who feel at peace. We're learning, through trial and error, how to take care of ourselves a little better each holiday season. Our first recovery task during the holidays is to accept ourselves, our situation, and our feelings about our situation. We accept our guilt, anger, and sense of loss. It's all okay. There is no right or perfect way to handle the holidays. Our strength can be found in doing the best we can, one year at a time. This holiday season, I will give myself permission to take care of myself. Today I am willing to be increasingly aware of my spiritual life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Heal Yourself Infuse healing energy into yourself, into your being. For too long, we’ve been attracted to things that drain us, exhausting our body, depleting our soul. That time has passed. The world is a spa, a nature retreat, a wealth of healing resources. Pour epsom salts and essential oils into your bath. Sit quietly by a tree or in a garden. Walk around the block in your neighborhood. Spend an afternoon in a nearby park or a day at the lake or beach. Throw stones into the river while you sit on the bank contemplating the eternal stream of life. Allow beautiful music to quietly imbue the stillness with healing instead of the pounding of your mind. Light a fire and awaken that darkened hearth to glowing flames and soothing warmth. Rise from your bed early in the morning. Open the curtains. Watch the sunrise. Feel the sunrise. Let it infuse you with its message. Let it energize you, invigorate you, fill you with life. At day’s end return to the window. Or step outside. Watch the sun set. Absorb its changing colors spreading beyond the horizon. Feel how it changes the earth and all it touches. Pet a puppy, stroke a piece of velvet, listen to a symphony. If you can’t slow down long enough to absorb the energy the first time, do it a second and a third. Absorb revitalizing energy until you can hear your voice, hear your heart tell you what would feel good, what would bring peace, what would bring stillness and joy. Before long, doing what brings healing and joy will become as natural as it used to be to do what drains, tires, depletes, and exhausts. It isn’t enough to draw near to the light. Absorb it into you. Let it charge you and change you with its energy and its power. Healing is all around you. Wherever you are, whatever your resources, healing energy, and joy are there. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let your family be Timothy attended one of those seminars, the kind that talks about personal growth and encourages people to open their hearts. After the seminar, he was so moved by what he’d heard that he called his father on the phone. He hadn’t talked to his father for many years. They had a squabble years earlier when Timothy left home. Neither one wanted tp make the first move or to forgive the other person for the harsh words that had transpired. Timothy made the first move. He and his father have been close ever since. Jessica had her share of troubled times with her mother,too. Over the years there had been times when they’d been close, times when they didn’t talk, and times when Jessica just did the minimum in the relationship, mostly out of a sense of obligation and guilt. As Jessica got older, she began feeling bad about her troubled relationship with her mother. She’d done her family of origin work. She knew her mother had been troubled; but after all, her mother was just a person. Why not forgive and forget? Jessica planned a big trip for the two of them to take, a mother-daughter vacation that would melt away the irritation and conflict from all the years. Jessica had so many hopes the day she met her mother at the airport. But when they got together in the same room for their two weeks of joy, Jessica realized she felt the same way she always had when she was around her mother: irritable, ashamed, and not good enough. Clarence liked his dad when he was a boy. But the older he got, the more he wanted to leave home. His father had issues; Clarence did, too. After Clarence left home, he only spent a few minutes each year talking to his father. One day, when Clarence reached his thirties, he decided it was time for him and his father to be friends. He planned a trip to his father’s house. He couldn’t wait for the heart-to-heart talk they’d have. Clarence would talk about the struggles of being a man and growing up, and surely his father would identify with him. But when they got together, alone in the house, after Clarence poured out his heart, all his father had to say was, “Can you come outside and help me change the tire on the car?” Families and parents come in all different kinds. Do your family of origin work. Be grateful for the good passed on to you from your ancestors and your heritage. Reach out, if that’s what your heart leads you to do. Be the best son or daughter you can, whatever that means to you. But don’t torture yourself if your relationship with your parents is not what you dreamed. Let each member of your family be who he or she is. Love them as much as you can. But if you never got along all that well before, you might not get along now, even after you open your heart. Laugh. Smile. You don’t have to react. You know how to take care of yourself. God, heal my heart toward all my family members. Help me accept each person for who he or she is. Then help me genuinely accept myself,too. *************************************** Beyond Counting Blessings Being Truly Thankful by Madisyn Taylor Our gratitude deepens when we begin to be thankful for being alive during this time and living the life we are living. Often when we practice being thankful, we go through the process of counting our blessings, acknowledging the wonderful people, things and places that make up our reality. While it is fine to be grateful for the good fortune we have accumulated, true thankfulness stems from a powerful comprehension of the gift of simply being alive, and when we feel it, we feel it regardless of our circumstances. In this deep state of gratitude, we recognize the purity of the experience of being, in and of itself, and our thankfulness is part and parcel of our awareness that we are one with this great mystery that is life. It is difficult for most of us to access this level of consciousness as we are very caught up in the ups and downs of our individual experiences in the world. The thing to remember about the world, though, is that it ebbs and flows, expands and contracts, gives and takes, and is by its very nature somewhat unreliable. If we only feel gratitude when it serves our desires, this is not true thankfulness. No one is exempt from the twists and turns of fate, which may, at any time, take the possessions, situations, and people we love away from us. Ironically, it is sometimes this kind of loss that awakens us to a thankfulness that goes deeper than just being grateful when things go our way. Illness and near-miss accidents can also serve as wake-up calls to the deeper realization that we are truly lucky to be alive. We do not have to wait to be shaken to experience this state of being truly thankful for our lives. Tuning in to our breath and making an effort to be fully present for a set period of time each day can do wonders for our ability to connect with true gratitude. We can also awaken ourselves with the intention to be more aware of the unconditional generosity of the life force that flows through us regardless of our circumstances. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We came to The Program as supplicants, literally at the ends of our ropes. Sooner or later, by practicing the principles of the Twelve Steps, we discover within ourselves a very precious thing. We uncover something with which we can be comfortable in all places and situations. We gain strength and grow with the help of God as we understand Him, with the fellowship of The Program, and by applying the Twelve Steps to our lives. Can anyone take my new life from me? Today I Pray May my prayers of desperate supplication, which I brought to my Higher Power as a newcomer to The Program, change to a peaceful surrender to the will of God. Now that I have seen what can be done through the endless might of a Higher Power, may my gift to others be that strong conviction. I pray that those I love will have the faith to find their own spiritual experiences and the blessings of peace. Today I Will Remember Peace — inner and outer — is God’s greatest blessing. *************************************** One More Day I have been sick and I have found out, only then, how lonely I am. Is it too late? – Eudora Welty At one time, we may have thought in absolute terms. Either a person was our best friend or not. Things were right or wrong. We may have driven people from us — people we could have loved and who would have enriched our lives. We have learned that if we are not happy, we need not accept things as they stand. The first step is always to admit there is a problem. Whether it’s loneliness, or we have been too brusque with others, or we need a spiritual change, we can admit it and do whatever is necessary to improve. We can turn to friends or even professionals for help if we need it. We can do this because it’s never too late. Although the very thought of change is frightening, I will assess my life and begin anew today. ************************************ Food For Thought Thinking Straight Before we found this program, we did a great deal of thinking in circles. Since we did not know how to stop eating compulsively, we spent a lot of time thinking up reasons for our behavior, making plans for change, and rationalizing another day's failure to eat normally. Our thinking often wandered away into fantasy, spinning dreams of when we would be thin and on top of things. Since we had to have reasons for our inability to make the dreams materialize, we blamed our failure on the people around us. "If they were only more loving, considerate, capable, exciting, smarter..." Such circular thinking got us nowhere. The more we fantasized, the more we ate, and the more we ate, the more we withdrew from reality. When our minds are not muddled by too much food, our thinking is clarified. The Twelve Steps put us on the road to responsible action, rather than irresponsible rationalization. Accepting the fact that we have a disease keeps us in the world of reality instead of a fantasyland. With Your truth, keep my thinking straight. ***************************************** One Day At A Time REGRET “Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it’s only good for wallowing in.” Katherine Mansfield Before I came into the program, I allowed fear to rule my life and prevent me from trying new things. I was absent from my own life. I was emotionally unavailable to my children and I stayed stuck in a deep hole of self-pity. I never really heard beautiful music or gloried in the miracles of nature. Although I had what people might perceive as a pretty normal life, it was actually an empty shell and I merely existed. I feel so saddened now at the thought of all the wasted years. I cannot bring them back, but I can learn from them. When I came into the program and read the Promises in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, I realized that it was futile to regret the past or to shut the door on it. Those years and all the pain I went through are what made me the person I am today. I need to always remember where I came from, because if I don't, I can just as easily go back there. I can also use my experience to help others on this wonderful road to recovery. I am able to give away what has been given to me so freely, because it’s only then that I can keep what I have. One Day at a Time . . . I must always remember where I came from so that I can help others in this program of recovery and keep myself from going back into the patterns of my past. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks - drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is little hope of his recovery. - Pg. xxviii-xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion Hour To Hour - Book - Quote In our recovery it is easy to forget to listen. We get two weeks of clean time and suddenly 'got it made.' Listening is actually our second greatest teacher, the horrors of addiction being our first. If we forget to listen to those who have gone before us, our first great teacher will take over again. May I please keep my ears open, more then my mouth during these initial learning months. Inner Hearing, Inner Sight Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I give myself the gift of listening. I will trust my inner voice. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When we feel that fate has dealt us a bad hand with chemical dependency, we simply remember that many people have MS, cancer, diabetes, lupus, or a myriad of maladies that are not so easily put into remission. Because I count my blessings, my blessings count. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Be kind to unkind people. It gets to them. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am willing to be increasingly aware of my spiritual life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote This guy had been dragged out of his car drunk by the police. He was handcuffed and chained to a bench at the police station, he'd just urinated on himself, and he looked up at the cop and said; 'I have got to stop driving.' - Scott R.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-15-2024, 04:35 AM | #25 |
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December 25
Daily Reflections AT PEACE WITH LIFE Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee - Thy will (not mine) be done." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85 I read this passage each morning, to start off my day, because it is a continual reminder to "practice these principles in all my affairs." When I keep God's will at the forefront of my mind, I am able to do what I should be doing, and that puts me at peace with life, with myself and with God. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Many alcoholics will be saying today: "This is a good Christmas for me." They will be looking back over the past Christmases which were not like this one. They will be thanking God for their sobriety and their new found life. They will be thinking about how their lives have changed when they came into A.A. They will be thinking that perhaps God let them live through all the hazards of their drinking careers, when they were perhaps often close to death, in order that they may be used by Him in the great work of A.A. Is this a happy Christmas for me? Meditation For The Day The kingdom of heaven is also for the lowly, the sinners, the repentant. "And they presented unto him gifts--gold, frankincense, and myrrh." Bring your gifts of gold--your money and material possessions. Bring your frankincense--the consecration of your life to a worthy cause. Bring your myrrh--your sympathy and understanding and help. Lay them all at the feet of God and let Him have full use of them. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be truly thankful on this Christmas day. I pray that I may bring my gifts and lay them on the altar. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "Fearless and Searching", p.261 My self-analysis has frequently been faulty. Sometimes I've failed to share my defects with the right people; at other times, I've confessed their defects, rather than my own; and still other times, my confession of defects has been more in the nature of loud complaints about my circumstances and my problems. ******************************** When A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do. Every time he tries to look within himself, Pride says, "You need not pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!" But pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogymen, nothing else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing ourselves is indescribable. 1. Grapevine, June 1958 2. 12 & 12, pp.49-50 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Liking Ourselves Self-esteem. It's maybe unsettling to learn that we need to like ourselves more, especially when we've often been accused of being conceited. Being conceited does not mean liking oneself; it's really a matter of being smug and contemptuous in our dealing with others. This attitude is easily recognized by others, and it causes them to dislike us. However, if we like ourselves in the right way, others sense this too, and they will be drawn to us. We will truly like ourselves more as we learn to practice the principles of AA. We will like the kind of life we are trying to live. We will like ourselves for practicing fairness and honesty. We will also like ourselves for letting people see us as we are and feel comfortable doing so. In liking ourselves, we feel no need to impress or dazzle others. I'll remember today that I have a right to be in the world. I will do my best to be fair toward others, but I will like myself regardless of their reactions. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another.--Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibnitz. Not that we're getting well. We feel the need for love more than ever. We tried to avoid love by using chemicals to feel good. But it didn't work. Addiction cut us off even more from people. How do we fill our needs for love? We can think about this fact: People give us love all the time. Only we just haven't seen it. Every time someone comes to a meeting to get well with us, that is love. Love isn't all-or-nothing. Little gems of love are all over. Watch them. Enjoy them. Give them to others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, love comes from You. Help me see it, and give it. Action for the Day: I'll look three persons in the eye today and send them love in my smile. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning What we suffer, what we endure . . is done by us, as individuals, in private. --Louise Bogan Empathy we can give. Empathy we can find, and it comforts. But our pain, the depth of it, can never be wholly shared, fully understood, actually realized by anyone other than ourselves. Alone, each of us comes to terms with our grief, our despair, even our guilt. Knowing that we are not alone in what we suffer, makes the difficulties each of us must face easier. We haven't been singled out, of that we're certain. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created. Suffering prompts the changes necessary for spiritual growth. It pushes us like no other experience to God--for understanding, for relief, for unwavering security. It's not easy to look upon suffering as a gift. And we need not fully understand it; however, in time, its value in our lives will become clear. I will not be wary of the challenges today. I will celebrate their part of my growth. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My friend promised when these things were done I would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator; that I would have the elements of a way of living which answered all my problems. Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements. Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all. These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but the moment i fully accepted them, the effect was electric. There was a sense of victory, followed by such a peace and serenity as I had ever known. There was utter confidence. I felt lifted up, as though the great clean wind of a mountain top blew through and through. God comes to most men gradually, but His impact on me was sudden and profound. pp. 13-14 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" The horrors grew. Inner horrors. On the surface it looked as though I was more or less keeping it together, but day by day I was dying inside, filled with fears I couldn't name but which shook me to the core. My worst fear was that I was an alcoholic. I wasn't sure what that was, except that I might end up down on the Bowery in New York, where I had seen drunks curled up on the sidewalk. I made another New Year's resolution--to stop drinking entirely until I could handle it and then, I told myself, I could go back to wine and beer. pp. 342-343 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." To avoid falling into confusion over the names these defects should be called, let's take a universally recognized list of major human failings--the Seven Deadly Sins of pride, greed, lust, anger, gluttony, envy, and sloth. It is not by accident that pride heads the procession. For pride, leading to self-justification, and always spurred by conscious or unconscious fears, is the basic breeder of most human difficulties, the chief block to true progress. Pride lures us into making demands upon ourselves or upon others which cannot be met without perverting or misusing our God-given instincts. When the satisfaction of our instincts for sex, security, and society becomes the sole object of our lives, then pride steps in to justify our excesses. pp. 48-49 ************************************************** ********* Every day is a gift. That is why we call it the present. --unknown "Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others." --Brian Tracy "The duty of helping one's self in the highest sense involves the helping of one's neighbors." --Samuel Smiles "Do not withhold good from those who deserve it when it's in your power to help them. If you can help your neighbor now, don't say, 'Come back tomorrow, and then I'll help you.'" --unknown Life's lessons are not taught in classrooms. --unknown "If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost, that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them." --Henry David Thoreau ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation GENEROSITY "And the Word was made flesh and dwelt amongst us." -- John (1:14) There is a beautiful fairy tale about a land where everybody had an abundance of "warm fuzzies" that they exchanged with each other and shared with each other. Everything in this land was wonderful because all the people were generously giving and receiving "warm fuzzies". Then a rumor began that there was to be a shortage of "warm fuzzies," and people began to hoard and selfishly protect their supply of "warm fuzzies." At this point, "cold pricklies" were introduced into the land. Sadness, pain, tension and persecution developed in the land, and the growth of the "cold pricklies" kept people separated, fearful and alone. The tragedy of this tale is that the rumor was not true! As long as people generously share their "warm fuzzies", they will never disappear. The "warm fuzzies" only disappear when they are not shared. The more we give, the more we receive. Abundance rests in giving, never hoarding! Master, may I always be generous with all that You have given me. ************************************************** ********* "For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord." Luke 2:11 "Then Jesus told him, 'Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.'" John 20:29 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Enthusiasm keeps the mind young and the spirit growing. Lord, may I always see wonder in the ordinary happenings of my day. No detail is too insignificant for God's attention. Lord, You encourage me daily as You guide my humblest moments. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Anonymity And Self-Will "The drive for personal gain... which brought so much pain in the past falls by the wayside if we adhere to the principle of anonymity." Basic Text pg. 73 The word anonymity itself means namelessness, but there's a larger principle at work in the anonymity of the NA program: the principle of selflessness. When we admit our powerlessness to manage our own lives, we take our first step away from self-will and our first step toward selflessness. The less we try to run our lives on self-will, the more we find the power and direction once so sorely lacking in our lives. But the principle of selflessness does a lot more than just make us feel better-it helps us live better. Our ideas of how the world should be run begin to lose their importance, and we stop trying to impose our will on everyone and everything around us. And when we abandon our "know-it-all" pretensions and start recognizing the value of other peoples' experience, we start treating them with respect. The interests of others become as important to us as our own; we start to think about what's best for the group, rather than just what's best for us. We start living a life that's bigger than we are, that's more than just us, our name, ourselves - we start living the principle of anonymity. Just for today: God, please free me from self-will. Help me understand the principle of anonymity; help me to live selflessly. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We have no right to ask, when sorrow comes, Why did this happen to me? unless we ask the same question for every joy that comes our way. --Philip S. Bernstein All of us have reasons to be grateful. Usually, the word implies we have received something. We often think of gratitude as that warm feeling we get from someone else's generosity. We are particularly grateful when we get unexpected gifts from those who owe us nothing. Within a family, we expect such acts of love because we are close to one another. But gratitude doesn't always come from being a receiver. Gratitude is warmest when it accompanies the joy of being able to give without expecting anything in return. We find it isn't enough to feel grateful. We have to express our gratitude by showing kindness and service to everyone around us. Gratitude is the greatest of all heart-openers. When it enters the heart, love pours out. For every kindness we receive, gratitude inspires a hundred acts of giving. How can I show my gratitude today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. In the sphere of material things, giving means being rich. Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much. --Erich Fromm Material possessions have great significance in our world. Not only do we strive to own a special car, electronic gear, and far more clothes than we need, but we also think in terms of possessing a girlfriend, or our health, or happiness, or things that cannot be owned. Some of us have become addicted to buying and owning things. This gimme-gimme mentality affects us all and, rather than enriching us, it impoverishes us. Tangible things enrich us only when we use them and share them to improve our lives and the lives of others. We don't need to be wealthy to share what we have with others. It is the sharing that nourishes us and builds bridges between us. Wise people have known for thousands of years that a man's spirituality is deeply affected by his relationship to his possessions. When we respect what we own as a gift from God and share it with others, we grow richer spiritually. I will hold my possessions loosely and with respect so they can be used well and shared. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. What we suffer, what we endure . . is done by us, as individuals, in private. --Louise Bogan Empathy we can give. Empathy we can find, and it comforts. But our pain, the depth of it, can never be wholly shared, fully understood, actually realized by anyone other than ourselves. Alone, each of us comes to terms with our grief, our despair, even our guilt. Knowing that we are not alone in what we suffer, makes the difficulties each of us must face easier. We haven't been singled out, of that we're certain. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created. Suffering prompts the changes necessary for spiritual growth. It pushes us like no other experience to God--for understanding, for relief, for unwavering security. It's not easy to look upon suffering as a gift. And we need not fully understand it; however, in time, its value in our lives will become clear. I will not be wary of the challenges today. I will celebrate their part of my growth. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. The Holidays Sometimes, the holidays are filled with the joy we associate with that time of year. The season flows. Magic is in the air. Sometimes, the holidays can be difficult and lonely. Here are some ideas I've learned through personal experience, and practice, to help us get through difficult holidays: Deal with feelings, but try not to dwell unduly on them. Put the holidays in perspective: A holiday is one day out of 365. We can get through any 24-hour period. Get through the day, but we aware that there may be a post holiday backlash. Sometimes, if we use our survival behaviors to get through the day, the feelings will catch up to us the next day. Deal with them too. Get back on track as quickly as possible. Find and cherish the love that's available, even if it's not exactly what we want. Is there someone we can give love to and receive love from? Recovering friends? Is there a family who would enjoy sharing their holiday with us? Don't be a martyr; go. There may be those who would appreciate our offer to share our day with them. We are not in the minority if we find ourselves experiencing a less than ideal holiday. How easy, but untrue, to tell ourselves the rest of the world is experiencing the perfect holiday, and we're alone in conflict. We can create our own holiday agenda. Buy yourself a present. Find someone to whom you can give. Unleash your loving, nurturing self and give in to the holiday spirit. Maybe past holidays haven't been terrific. Maybe this year wasn't terrific. But next year can be better, and the next a little better. Work toward a better life - one that meets your needs. Before long, you'll have it. God, help me enjoy and cherish this holiday. If my situation is less than ideal, help me take what's good and let go of the rest. Love fills me and heals me as I open to connect with the people that God has placed in my life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Experience the Thrill of the Climb Don’t stop now. You’re almost there. You’ve worked so hard to climb this mountain. In the beginning, you were excited. Exhilarated at the prospect of the mountain you were about to climb. Now, you are almost to the top. You’ve struggled, gotten weary, and kept going. Now, your goal is in sight. Keep going. Guidance is still there to help you. The life force, the one that keeps you going, keeps you moving forward, is still there too, burning brightly within you, charging all that you do with its energy. It is more difficult for you to feel it, but that is only because you’re tired. See the mountain climber as he climbs the mountain. There are dangers and precipices and challenges along the way. But the higher he climbs, the steeper it gets. The more tired he is, the more energy he has to put into the climb. Don’t tell yourself that the way you feel is an indication you should stop. The way you feel now is the way anyone would feel who was so deeply committed to life. It’s the way anyone would feel who had committed to climbing that mountain. Don’t stop now. Relax as much as you can. Know that the rhythm of life is still there, moving you forward. Don’t look back. Focus intently on each step. Soon you will reach the top. Soon you will reach your goal. Soon you will experience the victory. Keep your eyes focused on the path, look straight ahead. Embrace the thrill of the climb. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Point to the good Identify three things you like. I was talking to my daughter on the phone one day after I had visited her at her house. I took a moment during the conversation, and I listed the three things I most enjoyed and liked best about our visit that day. She caught her breath. She knew I was being honest. “Really?” she asked. “I mean it,” I said. “I meant every word I just said. Do you want to spark that relationship with your friend, your child, your lover, employee, co-worker, or boss? Instead of criticizing everything you don’t like, say what you like best. Most people have their share of insecurities about themselves, their relationships, and how they do at performing a task. Instead of thinking you’re the only one who feels insecure, tell people something that will help them feel good about themselves and their relationship with you. Three is a good number, don’t you think. Look in your heart and find three things you genuinely like about someone. Then tell them clearly what those things are. God, help me start looking at the good in the people I love. *************************************** The Joy of Being Celebrating the In-Between Times by Madisyn Taylor Real life most often happens during the in-between times when we are not celebrating a special occasion. While celebrations are intended to honor life’s more momentous occasions, much of real life tends to happen during the in-between times. While moving from one moment in time to the next is seldom considered a significant occurrence, it is during those in-between times that we are most in tune with life’s most profound, albeit simple joys. Between birth and death, triumph and sorrow, beginnings and endings, we enjoy innumerable experiences that often happen unnoticed. These times are just as worthy of celebration. The in-between times are seldom about landmark moments. How you choose to celebrate them or which moments you choose to celebrate is up to you. You may want to celebrate the simple facts that you are alive and that every day is a chance to spend time with the people you care about or do the work that you love. Then again, when you look at the good that exists in your life, many reasons for celebrating the in-between times may become clear: a cup of your favorite tea, a beautiful sunrise, a good book, and the smell of fresh air can be reasons for celebration. Celebrating the in-between times can be as easy as paying special attention to them when they do happen, rather than taking them for granted. It’s your focus of attention that can turn an in-between time into a celebration. You can also pay homage to the in-between times by slowing down and allowing yourself time to look around and allow your heart and mind to take in all of your life’s wonders. Far too often, we can let those simple moments of awe pass us by. The in-between times are when life happens to us between the pauses that we take to honor our milestones occasions. Without the in-between times, there would be no big moments to celebrate. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Today is a special day in more ways than one. It’s a day that God has made, and I’m alive in God’s world. I know that all things in my life this day are an expression of God’s love — the fact that I’m alive, that I’m recovering, and that I’m able to feel the way I feel at this very instant. For me, this will be a day of gratitude. Am I deeply thankful for being a part of this special day, and for all my blessings? Today I Pray On this day of remembering God’s gift, may I understand that giving and receiving are the same. Each is part of each. If I give, I receive the happiness of giving. If I receive, I give someone else that same happiness of giving. I pray that I may give my self — my love and my strengths — generously. May I also receive graciously the love and strength of others’ selves. May God be our example. Today I Will Remember The magnitude of God’s giving. *************************************** One More Day All living souls welcome whatsoever they are ready to cope with….. – George Santayana So often, a problem would be overwhelming if we had to solve it all at once. We can allow ourselves to dwell only on small pieces of the problem at one time. Then, when we’ve come to terms with one part, another portion can be dealt with. Whether we are facing the death of a loved one or having to cope with other personal problems, our minds help us sort out the order in which we can best handle our pain. Sometimes, we insist on tackling all of the problem, and we think ourselves into a kind of numbness. We’re unable to act. At those times, perhaps we can remind ourselves of how our minds work best. If we do, we can let go of the whole situation and, instead, take on only the small part we’re strong enough to handle. Today, I will let go of all I’m trying to cope with. I will pick one or two small, positive things I can do. Then, I will do them. ************************************ Food For Thought Confidence Our biggest problem was the inability to stop eating compulsively and the resultant obesity. This problem is never solved permanently, but it is overcome on a day-to-day basis. As we succeed in abstaining from compulsive overeating, we grow in confidence. Since by working the program we solve our biggest problem every day, we become confident that we can solve other problems as well. Confidence is trust that our Higher Power and OA will not let us down. Confidence is the knowledge that however tough life gets, we have tools and resources for dealing with it. Confidence believes in ourselves as children of God and people of value. Confidence is the willingness to give what we have, with the faith that our gifts are needed and acceptable. When we have confidence in our Higher Power and in ourselves, we are willing to try even though we may fail. If we fail, we are willing to try again. Since our will and our lives are turned over to God, as we understand Him, we have confidence that everything eventually works out for good. You are the source of confidence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time HOLIDAYS May peace be more than a holiday; May love be more than a season; May the feelings deep inside transcend the calendar; And, instead, become a way of life. Anonymous It is the time of Hanukkah ... of Christmas ... of Kwanzaa ... and other holidays. It is the time when the world is at its best and the hearts of all seem to be brimming with love. It is also the time of year that my very soul finds the most difficult. My physical and emotional recovery is compromised, and memories occupy every cell in my body, causing this vulnerable addict tremendous turmoil. These holy days test the gifts of that enigma which is my Higher Power ... the God Of My Understanding ... and when these days are over and normality returns, I smile at having once again made it through the holidays intact. One Day at a Time . . . I acknowledge that in my Higher Power I have a love that can never be fathomed, A spiritual resource that can never be exhausted, A peace that can never be understood, A rest that can never be disturbed, A joy that can never be diminished, A hope that can never be disappointed, A glory that can never be clouded, A light that can never be darkened, And a life that can never die ... Even on holidays. ~ Mari ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. we are not fighting it, neither are avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. - Pgs. 84-85 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It often happens that you won't know the role addiction played in your life until you stop using. You have replace roles now. Learning new skills, and this is done at meetings and with your sponsor, is a necessary step in adjusting to your new circumstances. Rather than see additional burdens in new tasks, I choose to see them as a breath of new life. The Treasures Within Within me is the perfect life waiting to awaken. The gifts I seek are already within me. A deep pool of awareness and aliveness is present all of the time but I am too distracted to know it. I get so lost in the superficial details and tasks of my life that I forget to live it, to drop down and contact the spirit that God has planted within me. It is the best kept secret that spirit lives within me, that the way in which I come in touch with my inner light is through letting the constant preoccupations of my mind float by, not taking them so seriously, not trying to control them. Today I realize that the gold is not in my ability to control my mind, the gold is in what lies beneath. What emerges when my mind, for a precious moment, is stilled. Spirit is with me always - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote As you sponsor others, remember this: If you are trying to recreate someone in your own image, then one of you will be redundant. My job as a sponsor is to model, not mold, recovery for my sponsees. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Love fills me and heals me as I open to connect with the people that God has placed in my life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote One drink's too many and a thousand is not enough.- Unknown origin.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-18-2024, 06:05 AM | #26 |
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December 26
Daily Reflections ACCEPTING SUCCESS OR FAILURE Furthermore, how shall we come to terms with seeming failure or success? Can we now accept and adjust to either without despair or pride? Can we accept poverty, sickness, loneliness, and bereavement with courage and serenity? Can we steadfastly content ourselves with the humbler, yet sometimes more durable, satisfactions when the brighter, more glittering achievements are denied us? TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 112 After I found A.A. and stopped drinking, it took a while before I understood why the First Step contained two parts: my powerlessness over alcohol and my life's unmanageability. In the same way, I believed for a long time that, in order to be in tune with the Twelve Steps, it was enough for me "to carry this message to alcoholics." That was rushing things. I was forgetting that there were a total of Twelve Steps and that the Twelfth Step also had more than one part. Eventually I learned that it was necessary for me to "practice these principles" in all areas of my life. In working all the Steps thoroughly, I not only stay sober and help someone else to achieve sobriety, but also I transform my difficulty with living into a joy of living. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I am glad to be a part of A.A., of that great fellowship that is spreading over the United States and all over the world. I am only one of the many A.A.'s, but I am one. I am grateful to be living at this time, when I can help A.A. to grow, when it needs me to put my shoulder to the wheel and help keep the movement going. I am glad to be able to be useful, to have a reason for living, a purpose in life. I want to lose my life in this great cause and so find it again. Am I grateful to be an A.A.? Meditation For The Day These meditations can teach us how to relax. We can be of service to other people in a small way at least. And we can be happy while doing it. We should not worry too much about people we cannot help. We can make it a habit to leave the outcome of the things we do to the Higher Power. We can go along through life doing the best we can, but without a feeling of urgency or strain. We can enjoy all the good things and the beauty of life, but at the same time depend deeply on God. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may give my life to this worthwhile cause. I pray that I may enjoy the satisfaction that comes from good work well done. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Accepting God's Gifts, p. 168 "Though many theologians hold that sudden spiritual experiences amount to a special distinction, if not a divine appointment of some sort, I question this view. Every human being, no matter what his attributes for good or evil, is a part of the divine spiritual economy. Therefore, each of us has his place, and I cannot see that God intends to exalt one another. "So it is necessary for all of us to accept whatever positive gifts we receive with a deep humility, always bearing in mind that our negative attitudes were first necessary as a means of reducing us to such a state of that we would be ready for a gift of the positive ones via the conversion experience. Your own alcoholism and the immense deflation that finally resulted are indeed the foundation upon which your spiritual experience rests." Letter, 1964 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Humility: Teachable and Honest Open to growth. Humility& is often used in the context of being honest enough to admit one's faults, but it also means being teachable. The truly humble person realizes there's always more to learn and is open to such learning. If we think we have humility, we usually don't. However, we can look back and recognize times when we made wonderful progress while being deeply humble. This was particularly true when we recognized our alcoholism and achieved sobriety. In this one action, we changed our lives. If we continue to practice the honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness that helped get us sober, these traits will be apparent in other areas of our lives. Though humility isn't generally sought as a way of life, it's the right way for recovering people. I'll be open today to ideas from any direction. I can learn something from every person. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To be emotionally committed to somebody is very difficult, but to be alone is impossible. --Stephen Sondheim. Let's face it, relationships are hard to work! But we are lucky! Recovery is about relationships. We learn how to set limits. We learn how to listen to and talk to others. In Step One, we begin a new relationship with ourselves. In Step Two and Three, we begin a relationship with our Higher Power. In later Steps, we mend our relationships with family and friends. In our relationship with our sponsor, we learn about being friends. And our past relationships with alcohol and other drugs is being replaced by people and our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for all the new relationships. Thank-you for teaching me how to feel human again. Action for the Day: Today, I'll make a list of all the new relationships I have now, due to my sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It is only framed in space that beauty blooms; only in space are events, and objects and people unique and significant and therefore beautiful. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh We must look closely; focus intently on the subjects of our attention. Within these subjects is the explanation of life's mysteries. To observe anything closely means we must pull it aside with our minds and fondle it, perhaps. We must let the richness of the object, the person, the event, wash over us and savor its memory. Many of us only now are able to look around ourselves slowly, with care, noting the detail, the brilliant color of life. Each day is an opportunity to observe and absorb the beauty while it blooms. I will look for beauty today, in myself, and in a friend, and I will find it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY For a moment I was alarmed, and called my friend, the doctor, to ask if I were still sane. He listened in wonder as I talked. Finally he shook his head saying, "Something has happened to you I don't understand. But you had better hang on to it. Anything is better than the way you were." The good doctor now sees many men who have such experiences. He knows that they are real. p. 14 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" Hands trembling, body shaky, head splitting, I survived the first day until I was fairly safe in bed in an alcohol-free apartment. Somehow I made it through a couple of more days, miserable in withdrawal. In spite of managing to stay dry that time, I have no doubt that resolution would have crumbled like the others and I would have been drinking again if I hadn't found A.A. p. 343 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." All these failings generate fear, a soul-sickness in its own right. Then fear, in turn, generates more character defects. Unreasonable fear that our instincts will not be satisfied drives us to covet the possessions of others, to lust for sex and power, to become angry when our instinctive demands are threatened, to be envious when the ambitions of others seem to be realized while ours are not. We eat, drink, and grab for more of everything than we need, fearing we shall never have enough. And with genuine alarm at the prospect of work, we stay lazy. We loaf and procrastinate, or at best work grudgingly and under half steam. These fears are the termites that ceaselessly devour the foundations of whatever sort of life we try to build. p. 49 ************************************************** ********* The paradox of control is simple. The more we try to control life, the less control we have. --Joan Borysenko, Ph.D. A person who possesses true peace is not one whose life is without problems and turmoil but is rather a person who has peace in spite of it. --unknown If you always do what you've always done, you will always be where you've always been. --unknown A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change. When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. --unknown ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation APATHY "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -- Edmund Burke I read about the Holocaust and I am ashamed. I am ashamed to belong to the human race that allowed, by an overwhelming silence, the slaughter of millions. The ultimate in people-pleasing is to do nothing. The fear of being an outcast or traitor allows the addiction to Power to develop. Power is an addiction that is rarely discussed in society. And yet evil needs people and politics to function alone it is but a word. With this new day I seek to be involved in the good life. Today I am not afraid to stand alone for what I believe to be the principles of a God-given spirituality. I know evil because I know myself. I know tyranny and injustice because for years I perpetrated negativity in my life. Now I choose to say "no". Today I seek to make amends for past wrongs by being rigorously honest in all my affairs. Because I know what it is to hate, I seek to love. I wish to be responsible in God's world. Teach me not only to learn from past mistakes but translate this knowledge into action. ************************************************** ********* "Nothing will be impossible with God." Luke 1:37 Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom. Psalm 145:3 "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration If you think success and really believe it will happen, you will perform in a manner that leads to success. Lord, may I always avoid negative thoughts and visualize myself in the manner that You intended for me. We are powerless to change our past, but we can change how we look at it. Lord, help me to realize that my past has made me a stronger person and show me that these experiences have taught me valuable life lessons. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Never-Failing Power "As we learn to trust this Power, we begin to overcome our fear of life." Basic Text pg. 24 We are people accustomed to placing all our eggs in one basket. Many of us had one particular drug of choice that was our favorite. We relied on it to get us through each day and make life bearable. We were faithful to that drug; in fact, we committed ourselves to it without reservation. And then it turned on us. We had been betrayed by the only thing we had ever depended on, and the betrayal left us floundering. Now that we've stumbled into the rooms of recovery, we may be tempted to rely on another human being to meet our needs. We may expect this from our sponsor, our lover, or our best friend. But dependence on human beings is risky. They fall short of perfection. They may be on vacation, sleeping, or in a bad mood when we need them. Our dependence must rest on a Power greater than ourselves. No human force can restore our sanity, care for our will and our lives, or be unconditionally available and loving whenever we are in need. We place our trust in the God of our understanding, for only that Power will never fail us. Just for today: I will place my trust in a Power greater than myself, for only that Power will never let me down. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I take it that what all men are really after is some form of, perhaps only some formula of, peace. --James Conrad When snow drifts quietly down on a winter evening, the hush of nature brings a great sense of peace. Each of us has known times like this. Many of these times did not depend on conditions like snow, or soft music. When we are able to keep a quiet center within ourselves, we are truly in tune with the spirit. Peace of the heart comes from a Power greater than ourselves, and from the faith that all of us, and all that happens to us, are part of a great plan. Just as the snow falls softly, without fear, without regard for whether it will land on a tree bough or in the street, we, too, can live our lives with peaceful acceptance of whatever comes along, knowing it comes to us naturally and from God. Am I prepared to accept wherever I will land today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He who knows how to be poor knows everything. --Jules Michelet Letting go is one of the simple yet profound spiritual tasks taught by many of the world's religions. Knowing how to be poor means knowing how to have a full and rich life without a dependent relationship with material wealth, food, chemicals, or sex. It means not relying on the props in life like expensive clothes, a prestigious job, or a sporty car, but relying only on the basics. Knowing how to be poor is knowing we are not in control and not wasting our serenity in trying. It means being completely honest in all things. It means knowing life is neither easy nor free of pain. Learning how to be poor is learning how to let go of all the essentials and appreciating the simplicity that endures. We don't automatically know how to do that, but we can learn. I don't expect to know everything, but my Higher Power can guide me and show me how to let go. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It is only framed in space that beauty blooms; only in space are events, and objects and people unique and significant and therefore beautiful. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh We must look closely; focus intently on the subjects of our attention. Within these subjects is the explanation of life's mysteries. To observe anything closely means we must pull it aside with our minds and fondle it, perhaps. We must let the richness of the object, the person, the event, wash over us and savor its memory. Many of us only now are able to look around ourselves slowly, with care, noting the detail, the brilliant color of life. Each day is an opportunity to observe and absorb the beauty while it blooms. I will look for beauty today, in myself, and in a friend, and I will find it. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Growth Just as when we were children and grew out of favorite toys and clothes, we sometimes grow out of things as adults - people, jobs, and homes. This can be confusing. We may wonder why someone or something that was so special and important to us last year doesn't fit the same way in our life today. We may wonder why our feelings have changed. When we were children, we may have tried to fit an outgrown article of clothing on to our body. Now, as adults, we may go through a time of trying to force fit attitudes that we have outgrown. We may need to do this to give ourselves time to realize the truth. What worked last year, what was so important and special to us in times past, doesn't work anymore because we've changed. We've grown. We can accept this as a valid and important part of recovery. We can let ourselves go through experimentation and grief as we struggle to make something fit, trying to figure out if indeed it no longer fits, and why. We can explore our feelings and thoughts around what has happened. Then, we can put last year's toys away and make room for the new. Today, I will let last year's toys be what they were: last year's toys. I will remember them with fondness for the part they played in my life. Then, I will put them away and make room for the new. I live today as I want to remember my life. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Take Time to Be with People You Love I left Colorado driving toward the canyons of southern Utah. I had a lot of places left to visit on my journey, a lot of work left to do. But something, rather someone, was pulling on me. My daughter, Nichole. She was in college in Arizona. When she finished exams, she planned to head to Minnesota to spend the summer there. We had talked about meeting somewhere midway. Now it didn’t look like that would work out. It might be months before we saw each other again. From where I was in Colorado, she was a hard day’s drive away. Besides, I had already been through Arizona, and it would take another day to get back to where I was now. I continued on my way. The pull from Nichole continued,too. Finally, I turned the car around and headed toward my daughter. When I arrived at her dorm about ten that night, I called her room. She asked where I was now on my journey. I told her I was downstairs in the lobby of her dorm. She flew down the steps. We hugged and kissed. And we spent the next three days at a nearby hotel. She studied and wrote her term paper. We visited. Watched movies. Ate food. Laughed. Cried. And shared memories. It was one of the nicest times we’d had together in years. When it came time to leave, Nichole packed her car and headed for Minnesota. I headed back toward Utah, stopping to enjoy the scenery of the Grand Canyon, scenery I had missed along my way. I felt renewed and refreshed. I hadn’t lost any time. I had gained the gifts of the heart. We search for sacred spaces, spiritual experiences, and truths. But the holiest places are often found when we spend time with people we love. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go The magic is in you Sometimes, we play a little trick on ourselves. We may get so close to someone, we think, I don’t have to let go. Or we may become so successful at manifesting events in our lives, we think, I don’t have to let go. When I want something, it just appears. Anytime we forget to let go, life will jog us back into remembering. There is nothing that we can cling to in this world. Ultimately, all that we hold dear will require us to let go, in some shape or form. That child will grow up and leave home. That love relationship that’s going so wonderfully? A new cycle will come, in its time. That friendship will change. That job you thought you’d always have? Oops, the company merged. Your position is changed. Although long-term relationships and secure employment and living in that house feels good, remember, that’s not where your security lies. Let yourself bond. Get close to that woman, or man. Let yourself enjoy being friends with the best friend you’ve ever had. Be a loving parent, 100 percent. Throw yourself into that job with all your heart and soul. But your security and joy are not in that other person or job. The magic is in you. Don’t get angry when the time comes in your life to let go. Open your heart to that person, place, or thing, and say, “Thanks for teaching me to love and helping me to grow.” Then let him or her go, without resentment in your heart. Because even though that time has come to an end, love can’t be lost. Even if it means an end to the best time you’ve had yet in your life. Look around at where you are now. Don’t forget to enjoy it,too. This will be the next best time you’ll have. Remember, love is a gift from God. God, help me keep my head up, my heart open, and know I’ll always be guided along the path. *************************************** Centering Ourselves Gathering Our Straying Thoughts by Madisyn Taylor All too often our lives can be spread too thin and it becomes important to gather our thoughts and center ourselves to become whole again. When our thoughts are scattered in several directions at once and we are no longer conscious of what we are doing or why, it is time to center ourselves. When we center ourselves, we begin by acknowledging that we have become spread too thin and we are no longer unified inside. Our thoughts might be out of sync with our feelings, and our actions may be out of sync with both. The main signs that we need to center ourselves are scattered thoughts and a feeling of disconnection or numbness, as if we are no longer able to take anything in. In addition, we may feel unfocused and not present in our bodies. Centering ourselves is a way of coming to terms with all the different energies within us and drawing them back into ourselves. Centering yourself means that you are working from or being aware of the core of your being in the solar plexus area of your body. At first it may not make sense, but as you progress you will understand what this feels like. We naturally know how to center ourselves when we take a deep breath, for example, before making a big announcement or doing something big. Another way to center ourselves is to sit down and engage in breath meditation. We can start by simply getting into a comfortable upright position and noticing as our breath enters and leaves our bodies. Our breath flows into our center and out from our center, and this process can serve as a template for all of our interactions in the world. In conversations, we can take what our friends are saying into the center of our beings and respond from the center. Our whole lives mirror this ebb and flow of energy that begins and ends at the center of ourselves. If we follow this ebb and flow, we are in harmony with the uni! verse, and when we find we are out of harmony, we can always come back into balance by sitting down and observing our breath. When we sit down to center ourselves we can imagine that we are gathering our straying thoughts and energies back into ourselves, the way a mother duck gathers her babies around her. We can also visualize ourselves casting a net and pulling all the disparate parts of ourselves back to the center of our being, creating a sense of fluid integration. From this place of centeredness, we can begin again, directing ourselves outward in a more intentional way. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day None of us can claim to know God in all His fullness. None of us can really claim to understand our Higher Power to any extent. But this I do know: there is a Power beyond my human will which can do wonderful, loving things for me that I can’t do for myself. I see this glorious power at work in my own being, and I see the miraculous results of this same power in the lives of thousands upon thousands of other recovering people who are my friends in The Program. Do I need the grace of God and the loving understanding of my friends in The Program any less now than when I began my recovery? Today I Pray May I never forget that my spiritual needs are as great today as they were when I came into The Program. It is so easy to look at others, newer to the recovery process, and regard them as the needy ones. As I think of myself as increasingly independent, may I never overlook my dependence on my Higher Power. Today I will Remember I will never outgrow my need for God. *************************************** One More Day Never let life’s hardships disturb you. After all, no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages. – Nichiren Daishonen A worry-free life. Wouldn’t that be the ticket? It’s hard to even imagine what life would be like with no problems. Once in a while a person will say, “If only I’d known…I never would have.” Or, “If I had understood, I should have…” We can’t life life always regretting past mistakes, and we shouldn’t fear furture ones either. The key to survival is not maintaining a stiff upper lip, as we hae been told, but to express our vulnerability. Stoicism gets nothing but more stress, so we’re learning to acknowledge our hardships as they come along. We’re not complaining or whining. We’re just bonding ourselves to the rest of the human race. I can face new problems, not because I’m so strong, but because I can honestly admit my weaknesses. ************************************ Food For Thought Control Control was something we either feared or did not know much about before we began the OA program. We resisted control as being opposed to our idea of spontaneous living, especially spontaneous eating, Control was for other people - our children perhaps - but not for us. Without control, we watched as self-will ran riot with our lives. We ate what we pleased, and then, angry and depressed, we said what we pleased and did what we pleased. The problem was that we ended up being not at all "pleased," but full of disgust and despair. Dimly, we may have realized that our suffering was due to lack of self-control, but we did not know how to go about acquiring what we lacked. By relinquishing our so-called control to a Higher Power, we learn what it means to be free. By using the OA concept of abstinence to control our eating, we find spontaneity in living. Rather than inhibiting us, the kind of control we develop through this program liberates us from the bondage of self-will. Control my life, I pray. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~VISION~ A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. Antoine De Saint-Exupery It never ceases to amaze me how the disease of compulsive overeating distorts the vision. Some compulsive overeaters can look into a mirror and see a fat person where there is none. Others can look into the same mirror and not see the weight that is there. Recovery brings new eyes to the compulsive overeater. It lets us to see what's really there in the mirror. Recovery allows each of us to see the cathedral we really are, rather than the pile of rubble we think we see. Recovery corrects our vision. One Day at a Time . . . As I work my recovery program, I will see myself as I really am, rather than seeing what the disease shows me. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Yes, there is a long period of reconstruction ahead. We must take the lead. A remorseful mumbling that we are sorry won't fill the bill at all. - Pg.83 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on clinging to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Being with Life Today, I allow myself just to be with life. Somehow it doesn't have to prove anything to me or give me any more than I already have to be okay. The lessons I have learned through sincere dedication to my own inner growth, have taught me that I can face my most difficult feelings and still come home to a place of love and acceptance. Life is always renewing itself; nothing lasts, good or bad, and that is just the way it is. It is enough today to enjoy my coffee, to take a walk, to appreciate the people in my life. I can rest in a quiet sort of understanding that this is what it's all about; all the searching turned up such an ordinary but beautiful thing. I am enraptured with the ordinary - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Everyone has problems. Your problem though, is not the real problem. The real problem is how you deal with the original problem. I work the program, not the problem. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Are you going to let bad times make you bitter or make you better? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I live today as I want to remember my life. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The Twelve Steps when simmered down to the last, resolve themselves into two words: 'Love' and 'Service'. - Dr. Bob.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-18-2024, 06:06 AM | #27 |
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December 27
Daily Reflections PROBLEM SOLVING "Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 42 Through the recovery process described in the Big Book, I have come to realize that the same instructions that work on my alcoholism, work on much more. Whenever I am angry or frustrated, I consider the matter a manifestation of the main problem within me, alcoholism. As I "walk" through the Steps, my difficulty is usually dealt with long before I reach the Twelfth "suggestion," and those difficulties that persist are remedied when I make an effort to carry the message to someone else. These principles do solve my problems! I have not encountered an exception, and I have been brought to a way of living which is satisfying and useful. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I need the A.A. principles for the development of the buried life within me, that good life, which I had misplaced, but which I found again in this fellowship. This life within me is developing slowly but surely, with many set-backs, many mistakes, many failures, but still developing. As long as I stick close to A.A., my life will go on developing, and I cannot yet know what it will be, but I know that it will be good. That's all I want to know. It will be good. Am I thanking God for A.A.? Meditation For The Day Build your life on the firm foundation of true gratitude to God for all His blessings and true humility because of your unworthiness of these blessings. Build the frame of your life out of self-discipline, never let yourself get selfish or lazy or contented with yourself. Build the walls of your life out of service to others, helping others find the way to live. Build the roof of your life out of prayer and quiet times, waiting for God's guidance from above. Build a garden around your life out of peace of mind and serenity and a sure faith. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may build my life on A.A. principles. I pray that it may be a good building when my work is finished. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Servant, Not Master, p.259 In A.A., we found that it did not matter too much what our material condition was, but it mattered greatly what our spiritual condition was. As we improved our spiritual outlook, money gradually became our servant and not our master. It became a means of exchanging love and services with those about us. ******************************** One of A.A.'s Loners is an Austrian sheepman who lives two thousand miles from the nearest town, where yearly he sells his wool. In order to be paid the best prices he has to get to town during a certain month. But when he heard that a big regional A.A. meeting was to be held at a later date when wool prices would have fallen, he gladly took heavy financial loss in order to make his journey then. That's how much an A.A. meeting means to him. 1. 12 & 12, p.122 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p.31 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Limiting Gossip No harm to others. "When you've told me their names, do not tell me their faults," a person said at an AA meeting. She was explaining how careful we must be to keep gossip within tight limits. However, it is possible to identify people in gossip without actually speaking their names. We can give so many facts that the listener can identify whom we're discussing. This is no less malicious and thoughtless than actually naming the person. We can avoid these dangers by giving up both the desire to gossip and the wish to listen to gossip. We will always have matters to gossip about; we can always find weaknesses in those we envy, faults in people we want to see taken down a notch or two. But if we persist in the program, we should find ourselves moving out of this limited way of thinking. We'll put severe limits on gossip at the same time. I'll sidestep gossip if it starts to find a way into my life today. Under God's guidance, I have better things to do. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Reading is to the Mind, what exercise is to the body. Good ideas are the seeds that start our growth. We hear things at meetings. We listen to our sponsor. Maybe we listen to program tapes. And we read. Reading is special because we do it when we're alone. We read in quiet times, when we can think. We can read as fast or as slow as we want. We can mark special words and come back to them again and again. We'll figure things out in our way, but we need help to get started. That's why we read. It gives us good ideas to think about. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak to me through helpful readings and help me learn at my best pace. Action for the Day: Reading is easier the more I do it. Today I'll feel proud that I've read program ideas to get my mind thinking in a healthy way. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning One needs something to believe in, something for which one can have wholehearted enthusiasm. --Hannah Senesh Life offers little, if we sit passively in the midst of activity. Involvement is a prerequisite if we are to grow. For our lives' purposes we need enthusiasm; we need enthusiasm in order to greet the day expectantly. When we look toward the day with anticipation, we are open to all the possibilities for action. We must respond to our possibilities if we are to mature emotionally and recover spiritually. Idly observing life from the sidelines guarantees no development beyond our present level. We begin to change once we start living up to our commitment to the program, its possibilities and our purpose, and it's that change, many days over, that moves us beyond the negative, passive outlook of days gone by. The program has offered us something to believe in. We are no longer the women we were. So much more have we become! Each day's worth of recovery carries us closer to fulfilling our purpose in life. I believe in recovery, my own; when I believe in success, I'll find it. There is magic in believing. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY While I lay in the hospital the thought came that there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might be glad to have what had been so freely given me. Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn might work with others. My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Particularly was it imperative to work with others as he had worked with me. Faith without works was dead, he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that. pp. 14-15 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" I had left the therapist who hadn't been able to tell me why I drank, and on New Year's Eve, I went to a party at the home of my new therapist. A few days later in the group, the therapist said, "You're drinking even more than I realized. You're an alcoholic. I think you should stop drinking, see a doctor, and go to A.A." p. 343 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." So when A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do. Both his pride and his fear beat him back every time he tries to look within himself. Pride says, "You need not pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!" But the testimony of A.A.'s who have really tried a moral inventory is that pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogeymen, nothing else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing ourselves is indescribable. These are the first fruits of Step Four. pp. 49-50 ************************************************** ********* A person who possesses true peace is not one whose life is without problems and turmoil but is rather a person who has peace in spite of it. --unknown "You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses." --Tom Wilson Everyone has a gift for something, even if it is the gift of being a good friend. --Marian Anderson Everyone wants to be appreciated, so if you appreciate someone, don't keep it a secret. --Mary Kay Ash The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself. --Anna Quindlen It's never too late — in fiction or in life — to revise. --Nancy Thayer ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LIES "Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them all." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes To lie is to rob life of meaning. In my addiction I was a liar, not just by what I said but by what I did, what I left unsaid and by my manipulation with half-truths. All lies shut out truth making us prisoners of fantasy and illusion. The world becomes what we want it to be rather than what it is and reality is lost. The liar is forced into the prison of loneliness, despair and isolation because nobody can know him, nobody can understand him. His language and communication are ego-centered. The liar is not living in the real world. He is living in his own world, with his own rules and definitions. The lies are the killing wounds, and they are self-inflicted. Today I prefer the pain of truth to the passing satisfaction of the lie and the habit of telling the truth is growing in me! God of Truth, may You ever be reflected in the life I seek to live. ************************************************** ********* Every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it, that it may bear more fruit. John 15:2 "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:14 But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law. Galatians 5:22-23 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration When we become aware that we possess all the spiritual treasures necessary for a productive and happy life, we will never want for anything. Lord, You are a limitless source of abundance and love. There is not one moment that we are separated from God's care unless we choose to be. Lord, You provide for my daily needs and deliver me from evil. You are my refuge. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God Could Restore Us To Sanity "The process of coming to believe restores us to sanity. The strength to move into action comes from this belief." Basic Text pg. 24 Now that we've finally admitted our insanity and seen examples of it in all its manifestations, we might be tempted to believe that we are doomed to repeat this behavior for the rest of our lives. Just as we thought that our active addiction was hopeless and we'd never get clean, we might now believe that our particular brand of insanity is hopeless. Not so! We know that we owe our freedom from active addiction to the grace of a loving God. If our Higher Power can perform such a miracle as relieving our obsession to use drugs, surely this Power can also relieve our insanity in all its forms. If we doubt this, all we have to do is think about the sanity that has already been restored to our lives. Maybe we've gotten carried away with our credit cards, but sanity returns when we admit defeat and cut them all up. Perhaps we've been feeling lonely and want to go visit our old using buddies. Going to visit our sponsor instead is a sane act. The insanity of our addiction recedes into the past as we begin experiencing moments of sanity in our recovery. Our belief in a Power greater than ourselves grows as we begin to understand that even our brand of insanity is nothing in the face of this Power. Just for today: I thank the God of my understanding for each sane act in my life, for I know they are indications of my restoration to sanity. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. In this sad world of ours, sorrow comes to all, and it often comes with bitter agony. Perfect relief is not possible except with time. --Abraham Lincoln Time may or may not heal all wounds. It depends on how we use the time. If we deny our sorrow, or runaway from it, or hope it will just go away by itself, we will be miserable. But if we turn and face it, and express our sadness in healthy ways, somehow we are transformed by the sorrow itself. While the loss is still there, it begins not to hurt so much. We can express our sadness in many ways. Crying is probably the healthiest means of expressing grief. It's good to cry, even for men, because it releases tension and stress, and we find a little peace afterwards. It is true that tears are healing. Getting angry and expressing our anger in appropriate, healthy ways also helps to heal wounds of loss, strange as it may seem. Yes, in time and with the courage to express our feelings, our wounds are indeed healed. What is a healthy way to express my anger at a loss? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value. --Albert Einstein The marketplace and fashion entice us in countless ways to indulge our individual pleasures. Some say that success will be with the man who follows those seductive beckonings. Even sacrificing long hours by working two jobs to become a financial success or to achieve high career goals can be self-centered activity. It may be time and energy spent seeking power and glory at the cost of time with our family and friends - time for enjoying each other and growing. Sadly, external success leads to superficial pleasure but never to peace within ourselves. However, when we pursue the values of honesty, humility, and service, we will find enduring self-respect and close friendships. This path provides a genuine experience of life's greatest rewards rather than the glitter of passing excitement. Today, I will strive toward the greater values rather than superficial successes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. One needs something to believe in, something for which one can have wholehearted enthusiasm. --Hannah Senesh Life offers little, if we sit passively in the midst of activity. Involvement is a prerequisite if we are to grow. For our lives' purposes we need enthusiasm; we need enthusiasm in order to greet the day expectantly. When we look toward the day with anticipation, we are open to all the possibilities for action. We must respond to our possibilities if we are to mature emotionally and recover spiritually. Idly observing life from the sidelines guarantees no development beyond our present level. We begin to change once we start living up to our commitment to the program, its possibilities and our purpose, and it's that change, many days over, that moves us beyond the negative, passive outlook of days gone by. The program has offered us something to believe in. We are no longer the women we were. So much more have we become! Each day's worth of recovery carries us closer to fulfilling our purpose in life. I believe in recovery, my own; when I believe in success, I'll find it. There is magic in believing. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Near the Top I know you're tired. I know you feel overwhelmed. You may feel as though this crisis, this problem, this hard time will last forever. It won't. You are almost through. You don't just think it has been hard; it has been hard. You have been tested, tried, and retested on what you have learned. Your beliefs and your faith have been tried in fire. You have believed, then doubted, then worked at believing some more. You have had to have faith even when you could not see or imagine what you were asked to believe. Others around you may have tried to convince you not to believe in what you were hoping you could believe. You have had opposition. You have not gotten to this place with total support and joy. You have had to work hard, in spite of what was happening around you. Sometimes, what motivated you was anger; sometimes fear. Things went wrong - more problems occurred than you anticipated. There were obstacles, frustrations, and annoyances en route. You did not plan on this being the way it would evolve. Much of this has been a surprise; some of it has not been at all what you desired. Yet, it has been good. Part of you, the deepest part that knows truth, has sensed this all along, even when your head told you that things were out of whack and crazy; that there was no plan or purpose, that God had forgotten you. So much has happened, and each incident - the most painful, the most troubling, and the most surprising - has a connection. You are beginning to see and sense that. You never dreamt things would happen this way, did you? But they did. Now you are learning the secret - they were meant to happen this way, and this way is good, better than what you expected. You didn't believe it would take this long, either - did you? But it did. You have learned patience. You never thought you could have it, but now you know you do. You have been led. Many were the moments when you thought you were forgotten, when you were convinced you had been abandoned. Now you know you have been guided. Now things are coming into place. You are almost at the end of this phase, this difficult portion of the journey. The lesson is almost complete. You know - the lesson you fought, resisted, and insisted you could not learn. Yes, that one. You have almost mastered it. You have been changed from the inside out. You have been moved to a different level, a higher level, a better level. You have been climbing a mountain. It has not been easy, but mountain climbing is never easy. Now, you are near the top. A moment longer, and the victory shall be yours. Steady your shoulders. Breathe deeply. Move forward in confidence and peace. The time is coming to relish and enjoy all, which you have fought for. That time is drawing near, finally. I know you have thought before that the time was drawing near, only to learn that it wasn't. But now, the reward is coming. You know that too. You can feel it. Your struggle has not been in vain. For every struggle on this journey, there is a climax, a resolution. Peace, joy, abundant blessings, and reward are yours here on earth. Enjoy. There will be more mountains, but now you know how to climb them. And you have learned the secret of what is at the top. Today, I will accept where I am and continue pushing forward. If I am in the midst of a learning experience, I will allow myself to continue on with the faith that the day of mastery and reward will come. Help me, God; understand that despite my best efforts to live in peaceful serenity, there are times of mountain climbing. Help me stop creating chaos and crisis, and help me meet the challenges that will move me upward and forward. Today I am unveiling my layers and layers of self-doubt and letting them go. Today I am taking back all the power I have given to others by discovering the courage that comes from my own wisdom. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Embrace Your Destiny Her words were simple but profound. “Fall in love with your destiny.” How often we search outside of ourselves for some elusive moment, for an experience like someone else is having, for an emotion we’d like to feel but aren’t, at least not right now. How often we long to be somewhere other than where we are, or someone other than who we are. How easy it can be to complain about and regret our past, thinking it’s somehow wrong. The answer is to fall in love– fall in love with our own life. Our destiny isn’t some far-off moment or something that happens to someone else. Our destiny is taking place right now. It’s been happening all along. Destiny is that mysterious force or energy that magically intertwines with choice, free will, and fate. Let all those elements weave together and create your life. But know you can help to create it too, by falling in love with your own life. Love all the places you have gone and all the places you will go. Love the lessons you have learned and the way you have learned them. Most of all, love where you are right now. Because that’s where your destiny lies. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Cherish the glimmers of light I know people who have been enmeshed in extremely hard times. One woman lost her husband and both children in a fire. Another found her teenage child hung to death– suicide– on her back porch one Sunday in the spring. I’ve known people struggling with chronic depression. I’ve known people who lost their fortunes in one swoop. I’ve known people who were active, healthy people one day, and the next day an accident paralyzed them for life. I had my years of grief,too, after the death of my son. Year after year the pain pounded incessantly, threatening never to abate. Listen carefully. I pray you will never have such a time. But even if you’re going through something like that, make every moment count. And pay special attention to the moments when the pain and the suffering subside, even if it’s only for a few seconds or hours. Count those moments as a gift, a glimmer of light. Hold them in your heart. Write in your journal about how much it hurts. Feel all your pain. But take the time to document those brief moments each week when just a glimmer of pleasure sets in. Remember, two plus two equals four. Four plus four equals eight. Those moments will add up. You might not be going through a time in your life that you relish, but try to find a few moments where you can catch your breath, look around, and say how sweet it is. God, help me find at least one thing in my life that makes me feel good and gives me pleasure, even if it’s for only one moment of my day. *************************************** Clarity of Soul Chakra Clearing Exercise by Madisyn Taylor Just as the spaces we inhabit need to be cleared of clutter, our energetic fields must also be cleared of the old. Just as the physical spaces we inhabit require that we clear them periodically of clutter, the energetic fields that are a vital part of our being must also be cleared of old thoughts, energy, and emotions. Clearing your chakras and your aura restores and strengthens your connection to yourself and your divine inner wisdom. Unfettered by energetic baggage masquerading as fear, pain, and self-hatred, your consciousness is once again free to grow. If you find the thought of clearing your energy fields disconcerting, simply think of it as cleansing the energy that surrounds you and releasing any stagnancy. You may not be able to see the results of your efforts, but you will experience a lightness of being and clarity of mind. You can begin by sitting or lying down on a comfortable surface. Take a series of deep breaths and allow your soul to connect with Mother Earth and the vast expanse of the Universe. Visualize your first chakra, situated near the tailbone, and imagine if you will, a valve opening there, much like a faucet. Imagine a cord dropping from your tailbone deep into Mother Earth and let everything that is stagnant within you flow through it. Let go of old energy, inactive thoughts, and anything else that no longer serves you. Ask the earth to accept what you are offering by turning this old energy into light. Continue to let old energy drain out of you until you feel like you’ve released all your energetic baggage. When you are done, imagine the valve closing. Before moving on to clear your next chakra, let vibrant terra cotta light travel upward from the earth and through the cord into your first chakra. Repeat this process with all seven of the body’s chakras. The second chakra i! s orange, the third is yellow, the fourth is green, the fifth is blue, the sixth is indigo and the 7th is violet. Afterward, visualize your crown chakra and draw beautiful, golden-white light from the universe flowing down through the top of your head. Release any worries or fears that you have been holding on to. Draw this light into your aura and enjoy the resultant feeling of peace. To finish clearing your energy and ensure that you have rid yourself of the last vestiges of clutter, take a bath infused with one cup apple cider vinegar, one cup Epsom salt, and one cup sea salt. After completing this exercise, be sure to thank Mother Earth and the universe for their help. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “The central characteristics of the spiritual experience,” wrote AA co-founder Bill W., ‘is that it gives the recipient a new and better motivation out of all proportion to any process of discipline, belief, or faith. These experiences cannot make us whole at once; they are a rebirth to a fresh and certain opportunity.” Do I see my assets as God’s gifts, which have been in part matched by an increasing willingness on my part to find and do His will for me? Today I Pray I pray for the wholeness of purpose that can only come through spiritual experience. No amount of intellectual theory, pep-talking to myself, disciplined deprivation, “doing it for” somebody else can accomplish the same results. May I pray for spiritual enlightenment, not only in order to recover, but for itself. Today I Will Remember Total motivation through spiritual wholeness. *************************************** One More Day For age is opportunity no less Than youth itself, though in another dress, And as evening twilight fades away the sky is filled with starts, invisible day. – Henry Waddsworth Longfellow As young children we probably had favorite elderly people who made us feel special. We never gave much thought to their age. During young adulthood, however, we may have begun to dread getting elder. For some reason we saw the outward signs of aging as the beginning of the end. As we become wiser and more mature, we come to realize that we once again venerate elderly people — for their wisdom, for their love, for their skills, and especially, for their joy of living. Many of us seem to choose one or two special people whom we wish to be like. And then we try our hardest to measure up. I look forward to the wisdom and joy of living that often come with age. I am no longer afraid. ************************************ Food For Thought Courage We pray for the courage to change the things we can. We cannot change the fact that we are compulsive overeaters, but we can change our actions so that we are not destroyed by our disease. Making changes requires the courage to start out on a new, unknown course. Courage does not mean the elimination of fear. Courage means acting in spite of the fact that we are afraid. It takes courage to learn to affirm one's rights as an individual, especially if the old way was to say yes to all demands and requests, reasonable and unreasonable. It takes courage to face the truth instead of continuing to live with comfortable illusions. Courage is necessary for working the steps of the OA program. Sometimes courage comes when we are pressed to a wall of failure. There is nothing to do but turn around and step out in a new direction, even though we are afraid. The courage born of desperation can produce remarkable results. Grant us the courage to move in Your direction. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ JOY~ Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations. George Bernard Shaw For many years my life was filled with pain and I felt totally empty inside. I did what I had to do for my children and for the people around me, but with a heavy heart, and life seemed to be one endless day after the other. What had happened to all the dreams and hopes I had for a life filled with joy and happiness? Sometimes the pain got to be so great that life just didn't seem to be worthwhile any more. At times I even contemplated ending my life. I have often heard it said that the opposite of pain is joy but in those dark days, I certainly couldn't see that. It is only in recovery that I see that the pain had a meaning, and it has brought me to a great appreciation of all the miracles in my life. I can appreciate the beauty in nature, and for the first time in a very long time my soul is filled with joy. When I listen to Beethoven's glorious Ninth Symphony with its last movement, the choral piece set to the poet Schiller's "Ode to Joy", I begin to realize that one can create something truly wondrous out of one's pain and suffering. Beethoven wrote this magnificent work shortly before his death, when he was in tremendous emotional pain and totally deaf. Yet he created this truly amazing piece of music that lives on nearly 200 years after his death, and will probably do so for many years to come. I now realize that there was a reason for my suffering and if, out of that, I can bring some joy or happiness to others, then my life will have had some purpose. It is only through this fellowship that I have been able to see that. One Day at a Time . . . I will always remember that my pain has been a growing experience that enables me to share what I have learned with other fellow sufferers. I can now appreciate all the miracles that my Higher Power performs in my life, and I am now truly able to experience joy. Sharon S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Young people may be encouraged by man's experience to think that they can stop, as he did, on their own will power. We doubt if many of them can do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar twist already acquired, will find he can win out. Several of our crowd, men of thirty or less, had been drinking only a few years, but they found themselves as helpless as those who had been drinking twenty years. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Sometimes it is tough to stay away from our drug of choice for a whole day. The call and craving are so strong! When we can't manage a whole day, we manage this hour. When the hour is up, we manage one more until we are clean. Help me to stay clean and sober, from one hour to the next. Appreciating What I Have Today I won't let my desire for more, blind me to what's already here. My life is full of blessings that I look right past when all I see is what's missing rather than what is there. Desire is natural and good, I need to feel it to grow and reach beyond myself. But today, I will appreciate what I already have before I ask for more. Appreciation is like water on a plant, it causes good to grow in my life. What I appreciate expands. It grows before my eyes, it deepens and widens. The mere act of appreciation somehow creates more of what I am already giving thanks for. It opens doors to the coffers of this generous world and invites the its bounty to come in. Appreciation lets the creative universe know that I am grateful for what is being so freely given to me. Today I will appreciate what I have knowing that it opens a doorway to increase - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote It is remarkable how often we run across this feeling of 'uniqueness' as we recover. We may brag that we used more, had worse contacts, spent more in bars, treated our family worse, were younger, older, blacker, gayer, more sensitive--whatever. I am the only 'me' there is ever going to be. I do not try to convince others that I am a better me than they. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you have one hand in the fellowship and one hand in God's, you can't pick up today. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am unveiling my layers and layers of self-doubt and letting them go. Today I am taking back all the power I have given to others by discovering the courage that comes from my own wisdom. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Alcoholism is the only prison where the locks are on the inside. - Peggy M.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
12-18-2024, 06:06 AM | #28 |
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December 28
Daily Reflections SUIT UP AND SHOW UP In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety - we try again to become citizens of the world that we rejected, and of the world that once rejected us. This is the ultimate demonstration toward which Twelfth Step work is the first but not the final step. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 21 The old line says, "Suit up and show up." That action is so important that I like to think of it as my motto. I can choose each day to suit up and show up, or not. Showing up at meetings starts me toward feeling a part of that meeting, I can talk with newcomers, and I can share my experience; that's what credibility, honesty, and courtesy really are. Suiting up and showing up are the concrete actions I take in my ongoing return to normal living. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A.A. may be human in its organization, but it is divine in its purpose. The purpose is to point me toward God and the good life. My feet have been set upon the right path. I feel it in the depths of my being. I am going in the right direction. The future can be safely left to God. Whatever the future holds, it cannot be too much for me to bear. I have the Divine Power with me, to carry me through everything that may happen. Am I pointed toward God and the good life? Meditation For The Day Although unseen, the Lord is always near to those who believe in Him and trust Him and depend on Him for the strength to meet the challenges of life. Although veiled from mortal sight, the Higher Power is always available to us whenever we humbly ask for it. The feeling that God is with us should not depend on any passing mood of ours, but we should try to be always conscious of His power and love in the background of our lives. Prayer For The Day I pray that today I may feel that God is not too far away to depend on for help. I pray that I may feel confident of His readiness to give me the power that I need. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Alone No More, p.252 Alcoholism was a lonely business, even though we were surrounded by people who loved us. But when our self-will had driven everybody away and our isolation became complete, we commenced to play the big shot in cheap barrooms. Failing even in this, we had to fare forth alone on the street to depend upon the charity of passers-by. We were trying to find emotional security either by dominating or by being dependent upon others. Even when our fortunes had not totally ebbed, we nevertheless found ourselves alone in the world. We still vainly tried to be secure by some unhealthy sort of domination or dependence. For those of us who were like that, A.A. has a very special meaning. In this Fellowship we begin to learn right relations with people who understand us; we don't have to be alone any more. 12 & 12, pp. 116-117 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Rehearing Rejection Fortitude The possibility of rejection exists with almost everything we do, if we are free to choose. We might not like rejection, but we want the same freedom to reject others. As freely choosing people, we need to turn down ideas or proposals we don't like. One thing we should never do, however, is rehearse rejections before they occur. If we do this, we may give up even before we have attempted what we hope to accomplish. In effect, we will be killing our hopes even before others have a chance to review them. This is always a ticket to failure. Rejection is really a feedback mechanism that reports information we ought to have. It tells us either to change our approach or to seek acceptance elsewhere. It is not evidence that we're completely unacceptable. Our problem with any single rejection may be that it causes us to recall all the rejections we ever had. We can learn to see any rejection as a normal event that can be beneficial if we accept it properly. I'll not let any fear or visualization of rejection keep me from actions I ought to take today. I am an acceptable person, and there is a place for what I have to offer. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making. --Lillian Smith As the sore tooth draws our tongue, so do rejections, affronts, painful criticisms, both past and present draw our minds. We court self-pity, both loving and hating it. But we can change this pattern. First we must decide we are ready to do so. The program tells us we must become "entirely ready." And then we must ask to have this shortcoming removed. The desire to dwell on the injustices of our lives becomes habitual. It takes hours of our time. It influences our perceptions of all other experiences. We have to be willing to replace that time-consuming activity with one that's good and healthy. We must be prepared for all of life to change. Our overriding self-pity has so tarnished our perceptions that we may never have sensed all the good that life daily offers. How often we see the glass as half-empty rather than half-full! A new set of experiences awaits me today. And I can perceive them unfettered by the memories of the painful past. Self-pity need not cage me, today. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple If You Walk With Lame Men You'll soon Limp Yourself. Seaman McManus Before recovery, we kept company with people who were as sick as us, or worse. We got angry and made fun of people who were trying to improve their lives. They scared us. They were like mirrors that reflected how spiritually lost we were becoming. Now we walk in the crowd we avoided. Now we have values. We have spiritual beliefs. Living up to these values and beliefs can be hard. We need to be around people who live by their values. In recovery, we learn that we need others. Remember, the first word in Step One is we. We need good people in our lives. We need friends who will not tell us what we want to hear, but what we are doing wrong. Prayer for the Day: Sometimes I act like I need no one. Help me pick my friends wisely, for my life is at stake. Action for the Day: Today, I'll pick one friend, and we'll talk about how we can better help each other. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My wife and I abandoned ourselves with enthusiasm to the idea of helping other alcoholics to a solution of their problems. It was fortunate, for my old business associates remained skeptical for a year and a half, during which I found little work. I was not to well at the time, and was plagued by waves of self-pity and resentment. This sometimes nearly drove me back to drink, but I soon found that when all other measures failed, work with another alcoholic would save the day. Many times I have gone to my old hospital in despair. On talking to a man there, I would be amazingly lifted up and set on my feet. It is a design for living that works in rough going. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" My resolution had endured three days and I protested, "I'm not an alcoholic!" That was my very last denial. "Say it the other way," he suggested. "I am an alcoholic." It came out in a whisper, but it sounded right. I've said it a thousand times since then, and with gratitude. What I was most afraid to admit that evening was what would set me free. p. 343 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." By now the newcomer has probably arrived at the following conclusions: that his character defects, representing instincts gone astray, have been the primary cause of his drinking and his failure at life; that unless he is now willing to work hard at the elimination of the worst of these defects, both sobriety and peace of mind will still elude him; that all the faulty foundation of his life will have to be torn out and built anew on bedrock. Now willing to commence the search for his own defects, he will ask, "Just how do I go about this? How do I take inventory of myself?" p. 50 ************************************************** ********* "When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." --Charles A. Beard "Learn from the negative as well as the positive, from the failures as well as the successes." --Jim Rohn "Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year." --Ralph Waldo Emerson "If you want to be listened to, you should put in time listening." --Marge Piercy "In every crisis there is a message. Crises are nature's way of forcing change--breaking down old structures, shaking loose negative habits so that something new and better can take their place." --Susan Taylor ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation HUMOR "Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him." -- Romain Gary Today I laugh at myself. Today I need to laugh at myself in order to stay sane. Today I choose not to take myself too seriously. When I tell jokes about the alcoholic, I am not belittling the person. I am making fun of the disease that nearly killed me. For me to live with the disease, I need to be able to laugh at the disease in this way I stop it from having power in my life. Also I catch something of the symptoms of the disease in the jokes: the grandiosity, arrogance, manipulation, insanity, ego, selfishness and exaggeration. The joke allows me to face reality with a smile. O God, thank You for the healing gift of humor. ************************************************** ********* "For you are my lamp, O Lord; the Lord shall enlighten my darkness." II Samuel 22:29 "Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face evermore!" 1 Chronicles 16:11 See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God. 1 John 3:1 "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13 "Then you will know that I am the LORD; those who hope in me will not be disappointed." Isaiah 49:23 "Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God." 1 John 4:7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Do not run ahead of the Lord, but walk with Him, pray for His guidance and listen to His answers. Lord, let me put Your will first in my life. Do what is right and good in the eyes of the Lord and receive the fullness of His blessings. Lord, I thank You for the gifts that I have received and ask forgiveness for all that I have done wrong. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Depression "We are no longer fighting fear anger guilt, self-pity, or depression." Basic Text pg. 26 As addicts, many of us experience depression from time to time. When we feel depressed, we may be tempted to isolate ourselves. However, if we do this, our depression may turn to despair. We can't afford to let depression lead us back to using. Instead, we try to go about the routine of our lives. We make meeting attendance and contact with our sponsor top priorities. Sharing with others about our feelings may let us know we aren't the only ones who have been depressed in recovery. Working with a newcomer can work wonders for our own state of mind. And, most importantly, prayer and meditation can help us tap the power we need to survive depression. We practice acceptance and remember that feelings like depression will unquestionably pass in time. Rather than struggle with our feelings, we accept them and ask for the strength to walk through them. Just for today: I accept that my feelings of depression won't last forever. I will talk openly about my feelings with my sponsor or another person who understands. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I'll walk where my own nature would be leading--It vexes me to choose another guide. . . . --Emily Bronte We journey across many intersections in our lives. Some may point in two directions, while others lead off in several. Our choice of direction can be difficult, especially when our friends choose a road we know to be dangerous. When this happens, we can choose to go our own way without them. If they begin to tease and taunt us about our decisions, may we remember that they are as scared as we were about their friends' reaction. We are not, after all, living for someone else. If we would be leaders, we can be assured that true leadership comes from following our own directions with confidence that it's right for us, not from fear of losing others' company. We can let others live their own lives without us, if their direction is not for us. We can walk away with pride, satisfied in the knowledge that we refused to allow other people's fears change our decisions. How have I gone my own way recently? You are reading from the book Touchstones. He is a man whom it is impossible to please, because he is never pleased with himself. --Goethe Many of us grew up trying to please our fathers and feeling we never got the approval we needed. Perhaps our fathers couldn't feel pleased with themselves. Now it is time to take stock of ourselves and ask whether we are perpetuating the pattern in our own lives. If we still feel unhappy with ourselves, we may never be satisfied with anyone else either. Spouses, children, bosses, even the parking lot attendant may receive the brunt of our self-disapproval. We don't totally change these patterns in an instant. We change them one day at a time. Today, we have before us a small piece of the future. We can begin by treating ourselves decently. Maybe we can't feel a strong sense of personal approval yet, but we can give ourselves some basic respect. We can start by remembering we have the love of God. We can affirm at least one positive thing about ourselves. After some positive reflection, we will have more to give to others. Today, I will give myself approval for at least one thing. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making. --Lillian Smith As the sore tooth draws our tongue, so do rejections, affronts, painful criticisms, both past and present draw our minds. We court self-pity, both loving and hating it. But we can change this pattern. First we must decide we are ready to do so. The program tells us we must become "entirely ready." And then we must ask to have this shortcoming removed. The desire to dwell on the injustices of our lives becomes habitual. It takes hours of our time. It influences our perceptions of all other experiences. We have to be willing to replace that time-consuming activity with one that's good and healthy. We must be prepared for all of life to change. Our overriding self-pity has so tarnished our perceptions that we may never have sensed all the good that life daily offers. How often we see the glass as half-empty rather than half-full! A new set of experiences awaits me today. And I can perceive them unfettered by the memories of the painful past. Self-pity need not cage me, today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Panic Don't panic! If panic strikes, we do not have to allow it to control our behaviors. Behaviors controlled by panic tend to be self-defeating. No matter what the situation or circumstance, panic is usually not a good foundation. No matter what the situation or circumstance, we usually have at least a moment to breathe deeply and restore our serenity and peace. We don't have to do more than we can reasonably do - ever! We don't have to do something we absolutely cannot do or cannot learn to do! This program, this healthy way of life we are seeking, is built on a foundation of peace and quiet confidence - in ourselves, in our Higher Power, in the recovery process. Do not panic. That takes us away from the path. Relax. Breathe deeply. Let peace flow through our body and mind. From this base, our Source shall supply the necessary resources. Today, I will treat panic as a separate issue that needs immediate attention. I will refuse to allow panicky thoughts and feelings to motivate me. Instead, I will let peace and trust motivate my feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. Today I am slowing down my pace. I do not have to accomplish the entire world in this day. It is one day. Today I have time to stop and smell the flowers. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Heal Yourself Infuse healing energy into yourself, into your being. For too long, we’ve been attracted to things that drain us, exhausting our body, depleting our soul. That time has passed. The world is a spa, a nature retreat, a wealth of healing resources. Pour Epsom salts and essential oils into your bath. Sit quietly by a tree or in a garden. Walk around the block in your neighborhood. Spend an afternoon in a nearby park or a day at the lake or beach. Throw stones into the river while you sit on the bank contemplating the eternal stream of life. Allow beautiful music to quietly imbue the stillness with healing instead of the pounding of your mind. Light a fire and awaken the darkened hearth to glowing flames and soothing warmth. Rise from your bed early in the morning. Open the curtains. Watch the sunrise. Feel the sunrise. Let it infuse you with its message. Let it energize you, invigorate you, fill you with life. At day’s end return to the window. Or step outside. Watch the sunset. Absorb its changing colors spreading out beyond the horizon. Feel how it changes the earth and all it touches. Pet a puppy, stroke a piece of velvet, listen to a symphony. If you can’t slow down long enough to absorb the energy the first time, do it a second and a third. Absorb revitalizing energy until you can hear your voice, hear your heart tell you what would feel good, what would bring peace, what would bring stillness and joy. Before long, doing what brings healing and joy will become as natural as it used to be to do what drains, tires, depletes, and exhausts. It isn’t enough to draw near to the light. Absorb it into you. Let it charge you and change you with its energy and its power. Healing is all around you. Wherever you are, whatever your resources, healing, energy, and joy are there. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Risk being alive “I know nothing is going to lasr forever,” Charlie said. “But the key to life and being happy is acting as though it is.” Many of us have had our illusions about security and permanency shattered. The longer we’re alive, the more it gets beat into us: nothing is forever. We can plan on many things, but the only thing we can plan on with any certainty is change. At some time in our lives, we may have convinced ourselves otherwise. We surrendered ourselves to that job, that project, or that relationship with all our hearts, only to have it crash to an end. Some of us may have decided, after enough cycles of beginnings, middles, and endings, that the way to deal with this was never to fully give our hearts to any person or circumstance, never to let ourselves fully be present and enjoy the moment. If I don’t get in completely, I won’t get hurt when it ends, we think. Maybe. But you won’t experience the pleasure and joy, the rich, sweet full taste of those moments, either. Okay, so you’re wiser now. You know nothing lasts forever. You know the moment something happens, the ending has already been written,too. People are born. They die. A job or project begins. Then it ends. But there’s an entire luscious middle waiting, inviting you to jump in fully and see how sweet life can be. Besides, when the ending does come, you’ll also have been given enough wisdom, courage, and grace to deal with that,too. What are you waiting for? Go ahead. Stop holding back. Jump in. Live your life. God, give me enough faith and a well of letting go so I can live each moment fully. *************************************** Useful Transformation Make Change Work for You by Madisyn Taylor When we experience change in our life we can control our response and reaction to the changes that are happening. Transformation is a universal constant that affects our lives from the moment we are born until we leave earthly existence behind. At the root of all growth, we find change. Occasionally, change and the circumstances leading up to it are a source of extraordinary joy, but more often than not they provoke feelings of discomfort, fear, or pain. Though many changes are unavoidable, we should not believe that we are subject to the whims of an unpredictable universe. It is our response to those circumstances that will dictate the nature of our experiences. At the heart of every transformation, no matter how chaotic, there is substance. When we no longer resist change and instead regard it as an opportunity to grow, we find that we are far from helpless in the face of it. Our role as masters of our own destinies is cemented when we choose to make change work in our favor. Yet before we can truly internalize this power, we must accept that we cannot hide from the changes taking place all around us. Existence as we know it will come to an end at one or more points in our lives, making way for some new and perhaps unexpected mode of being. This transformation will take place whether or not we want it to, and so it is up to us to decide whether we will open our eyes to the blessings hidden amidst disorder or close ourselves off from opportunities hiding behind obstacles. To make change work for you, look constructively at your situation and ask yourself how you can benefit from the transformation that has taken place. As threatening as change can seem, it is often a sign that a new era of your life has begun. If you reevaluate your plans and goals in the days or weeks following a major change, you will discover that you can adapt your ambition to the circumstances before you and even capitalize on these changes. Optimism, enthusiasm, and flexibility will aid you greatly here, as there is nothing to be gained by dwelling on what might have been. Change can hurt in the short term but, if you are willing to embrace it proactively, its lasting impact will nearly always be physically, spiritually, and intellectually transformative. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program, for me, is not a place nor a philosophy, but a highway to freedom. The highway leads me toward the goal of a “spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps.” The highway doesn’t get me to the goal as quickly as I some wish, but I try to remember that God and I work from different timetables. But the goal is there, and I know that the Twelve Steps will help me reach it. Have I come to the realization that I — and anyone — can now do what I had always thought impossible? Today I Pray As I live The Program, may I realize more and more that it is a means to an end rather than an end in itself. May I keep in mind that the mind of spirituality it calls for is never complete, but is the essence of change and growth, a drawing nearer to an ideal state. May I be wary of setting time-oriented goals for myself to measure my spiritual progress. Today I Will Remember Timetables are human inventions. *************************************** One More Day Sadness flies away on the wings of time. – Jean De La Fontaine When we’re sad, it’s hard to believe that time will heal all our wounds. An old family-practice doctor used to call it the TOT Treatment — Tincture of Time. Our sadness may be due to a change in living patterns or even in the weather. It might be due to loss of a loved one, of good health, or even of a cherished object. And our grief takes time. Whatever the reason for our sadness, after a self-imposed period of time alone, we begin to venture out once again into our world. We work our way, ever so slowly, back into some pattern of normalcy. TOT has done it’s work once again. Laughter surfaces, and we know we have put enough time and space between us and our sadness. We are whole again. A time of sadness is natural, just as natural as the rediscovered joy that follows it. ************************************ Food For Thought Minimizing Temptation There are things we can do to minimize the temptations that are around us. We are constantly exposed to food advertisements if we watch television and read magazines. Most of us need to spend a certain amount of time purchasing and preparing food. Social gatherings usually involve refreshments. All of this exposure to food can be uncomfortable for compulsive overeaters if we do not find ways to minimize it. It is a good idea to skip the recipe sections in the magazines we read. Unnecessary thinking about food only intensifies our obsession. Moving away from the television set during a food commercial is a way to minimize that kind of temptation. Grocery shopping is expedited by not considering any items other than those on a prepared list and by spending as little time as possible in the grocery store. Meal preparation can be simplified so that less rather than more time is spent in the kitchen. At parties, we can concentrate on people and conversation instead of food. The best way to handle temptation is by remembering that we are compulsive overeaters and that nothing is worth activating our disease. Guide us as we avoid temptation. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~MEDITATION~ God is the mirror of silence in which all creation is reflected. Paramahansa Yogananda The disease of compulsive overeating is a devious one. It tries to tell me that I'm not a worthwhile person. It tries to tell me that I'm never going to recover, so I may as well eat. The disease tries to make me feel like I'm the lowest of the low. Fortunately, there are many things in this recovery program that counteract the disease. I can use a food plan to make sure I don't eat what I'm not supposed to eat. I can read program literature to show me how to live triumphantly. I can work the Steps, do service, make outreach calls; there's so much I can do which can bring recovery from compulsive overeating. Another of the things I can do to counteract my disease is meditation. When I meditate, I come into conscious contact with my Higher Power. Meditation helps me to see that I am a worthwhile person, that God loves me just as I am. When I meditate I gain insights into the program literature I'm reading, I learn the things I need to do to further my recovery. I also learn the things that stifle my growth, so I can stop doing them. Meditation is very important to my recovery program. One Day at a Time . . . I remember the importance of meditation, and I meditate every day. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Here is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees. - Pg. 21 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Our 12 steps are dedicated primarily to the cultivation of principle in the befuddled addict's mind. Spiritual soundness leads to mental soundness. Even though we don't understand the process of our program to stop our cravings, we must trust that IT WORKS. I look at those around me, at their success and know that this process WORKS even if it isn't clear how. Self Importance I will get my mind off of the treadmill. There is more to life than my worries and obsessions. Just for today I won't give every little thing more importance than it deserves. In the scheme of things, all of my petty annoyances aren't all that important. I don't have to take them so seriously that they disturb my inner peace. When I am constantly preoccupies with all that's wrong, I forget to remember all that's right. Self importance is different from valuing myself. Self importance gets me tied up in mental knots, valuing myself is nourishing and loving. I will get out of my own way today - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The reason people blame other people is because there is only one alternative. I do not point a finger at another because there are always three pointing back at me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When you look in the mirror, you are looking at the problem, but, remember, you are also looking at the solution. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am slowing down my pace. I do not have to accomplish the entire world in this day. It is one day. Today I have time to stop and smell the flowers. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote When in deep water; become a diver. - Unknown origin.
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December 29
Daily Reflections THE JOY OF LIVING . . . . therefore the joy of good living is the theme of A.A.'s Twelfth Step. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125 A.A. is a joyful program! Even so, I occasionally balk at taking the necessary steps to move ahead, and find myself resisting the very actions that could bring about the joy I want. I would not resist if those actions did not touch some vulnerable area of my life, an area that needs hope and fulfillment. Repeated exposure to joyfulness has a way of softening the hard, outer edges of my ego. Therein lies the power of joyfulness to help all members of A.A. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Participating in the privileges of the movement, I shall share in the responsibilities, taking it upon myself to carry my fair share of the load, not grudgingly but joyfully. I am deeply grateful for the privileges I enjoy because of my membership in this great movement. They put an obligation upon me which I will not shirk. I will gladly carry my fair share of the burdens. Because of the joy of doing them, they will no longer be burdens, but opportunities. Will I accept every opportunity gladly? Meditation For The Day Work and prayer are the two forces which are gradually making a better world. We must work for the betterment of ourselves and our fellow men. Faith without works is dead. But all work with people should be based on prayer. If we say a little prayer before we speak or try to help, it will make us more effective. Prayer is the force behind the work. Prayer is based on faith that God is working with us and through us. We can believe that nothing is impossible in human relationships, if we depend on the help of God. Prayer For The Day I pray that my life may be balanced between prayer and work. I pray that I may not work without prayer or pray without work. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Unlimited Choice, p. 201 Any number of alcoholics are bedeviled by the dire conviction that if they ever go near A.A. they will be pressured to conform to some particular brand of faith or theology. They just don't realize that faith is never an imperative for A.A. membership. That sobriety can be achieved with an easily acceptable minimum of it, and that our concepts of a Higher Power and God--as we understand Him--afford everyone a nearly unlimited choice of spiritual belief and action. ******************************** In talking to a prospect, stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he is willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles. 1. Grapevine, April 1961 2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 93 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Mending the past No Regrets of the Past "The past is best mended by living so fully today that its errors have no place in our lives." These words by an AA member suggest an approach for healing from the past. All of us would benefit to use today's knowledge to deal with situations we mishandled in the past. But we must remember that whatever mistakes we made, we had available only the knowledge and resources we possessed the, and we may have done about as well as we possibly could at this time. We should also remember that active alcoholism is a crippling and ugly disease with many terrible consequences. It's not surprising that bad things happened to others and us when we were drinking. We can only be grateful that we are now recovering and that matters are better, not worse, than they once were. I'll live fully today, allowing no thoughts of regret from my past to intrude. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Many people are living in an emotional jail without recognizing it. Virginia Satir. Our disease was our jail. We felt so bad that we were sure we must have done something awful. But we didn't cause our disease. We have done nothing to deserve our disease. We aren't responsible for the fact that we have a disease. But we ARE responsible for our recovery. We have been granted probation. The terms of our probation are simple: don't drink or use other drugs, and work the Steps. If we follow these simple rules, we'll be free. And it will be clear to us that only a Power greater than ourselves could give us this freedom. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to stay free. For this next twenty-four - hour period, take from me any urge to drink or use other drugs. With Your help, I'll be free. Action for the Day: Today, I'll think about my disease. I am not morally weak. I have a dangerous illness. What can keep me free from my disease? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Relationships with other people are necessary to escape loneliness; however, relationships do not guarantee freedom from pain. Nurturing a meaningful relationship with another human being takes patience, even when we don't have any. It takes tolerance, even if we don't feel it. It takes selflessness, at those very moments our own ego is crying for attention. Yet, we need relationships with others; they inspire us. We learn who we are and who we can become through relationships. They precipitate our accomplishments. Our creativity is encouraged by them, and so is our emotional and spiritual development. We can look around us, attentively. We can feel blessed, even when it's a negative situation. Every situation is capable of inspiring a positive step forward. Every situation is meant for our good. There's risk in human relationships, and it's often accompanied by pain. But I am guaranteed growth, and I will find the happiness I seek. I will reach out to someone today. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY We commenced to make many fast friends and a fellowship has grown up among us of which it is a wonderful thing to feel a part. The joy of living we really have, even under pressure and difficulty. I have seen hundreds of families set their feet in the path that really goes somewhere; have seen the most impossible domestic situations righted; feuds and bitterness of all sorts wiped out. I have seen men come out of asylums and resume a vital place in the lives of their families and communities. Business and professional men have regained their standing. There is scarcely any form of trouble and misery which has not been overcome among us. In one western city and its environs there are one thousand of us and our families. We meet frequently so that newcomers may find the fellowship they seek. At these informal gatherings one may often see from 50 to 200 persons. We are growing in numbers and power.* * In 2001, A.A. is composed of over 100,000 groups. pp. 15-16 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" The therapist told me then and there to call someone who had been in our therapy group, a doctor on the staff of a hospital alcoholism service. "I'll call her tomorrow," I said. "Call her now." He handed me the phone. p. 343 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and fairly obvious. Using his best judgment of what has been right and what has been wrong, he might make a rough survey of his conduct with respect to his primary instincts for sex, security, and society. Looking back over his life, he can readily get under way by consideration of questions such as these: When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Did I spoil my marriage and injure my children? Did I jeopardize my standing in the community? Just how did I react to these situations at the time? Did I burn with a guilt that nothing could extinguish? Or did I insist that I was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself? How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on other people? If there was rejection or coldness at home, did I use this as a reason for promiscuity? pp. 50-51 ************************************************** ********* Keep your sobriety first to make it last. --unknown Having the world's best idea will do you no good unless you act on it. People who want milk shouldn't sit on a stool in the middle of a field in hopes that a cow will back up to them. --Curtis Grant When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm. --Sherrie R. "When nobody around you measures up, it's time to check your yardstick." --Bill Lemly Without God's inner source of enlightenment and refreshment, I would soon stagnate and feel despair. --Shelley The heart of AA is the act of one person giving to another. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation MADNESS "The madman who knows that he is mad is close to sanity." -- Juan Ruiz de Alarcon An alcoholic who continues to drink is committing suicide. An addict who continues to use is committing suicide. An overeater who continues to eat compulsively and destructively is committing suicide. Madness. It is like a man standing in the town square stabbing himself with a knife and asking the passer-by, "Why am I bleeding?" Today I accept my past destructive behavior and try to change it on a daily basis. Spirituality is loving yourself enough to "see" the writing on the wall and do something about it. Change is sanity for the madman! God, You seem to have given me a dose of insanity. Let me use it to Your glory. ************************************************** ********* "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me." Revelation 3:20 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself. Philippians 2:3 "Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and stand he will, for the Lord is able to make him stand." Romans 14:4 "The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Today picture yourself as the happiest person that you know and watch how contagious this enthusiasm for life is. Lord, may I bring out the best in those with whom I share today so they can in turn bring out more of my best. Choose God instead of choosing to worry. Lord, in Your justice, rescue and deliver me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Through Others' Eyes "When someone points out a shortcoming, our first reaction may be defensive....[But] if we truly want to be free, we will take a good look at input from fellow addicts." Basic Text pg. 35 At some point in our recovery, we come to the awkward realization that the way we see ourselves is not necessarily the way others do. We are probably neither as bad, as good, as beautiful, or as ugly as we think we are - but we are too close to ourselves to really tell for sure. That's where our friends in the program come in, caring enough to share with us what they see when they look in our direction. They tell us the good things about ourselves we might not know - and they tell us the hard things, too, that we might not be able to see. We may react defensively to such "help" and, in some cases, justly so. However, even malicious remarks about our supposed shortcomings can shed light on aspects of our recovery that we cannot see ourselves. Wherever a useful insight comes from, for whatever reason it is offered, we cannot afford to discount it. We don't need to wait for others to spontaneously offer their insight. When we spend time with our sponsor or other NA members we trust, we can make the first move and ask them to tell us what they see about particular areas of our lives to which we are blind. We want a broader vision of our life than just our own; we can have that vision by seeing ourselves through the eyes of others. Just for today: I seek to see myself as I truly am. I will listen to what others say about me, and see myself through their eyes. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The price of dishonesty is self-destruction. --Rita Mae Brown There once was a woman who told her husband what she thought he wanted to hear. She told him she was happy when she wasn't. She told him she liked his friends when she didn't. She tried to figure out what he wanted so she could do it for him. She felt hurt when he didn't do the same for her. She felt he should also try to read her mind and do what she wanted without her having to express it. She was scared to tell him how she really felt. However, her pain and resentment grew so much she couldn't stand it any longer, so she told him her true feelings. He was so used to hearing her lies that he called her a liar when she told the truth. Now she knew how much she had hurt herself by trying to please him at the cost of her own honesty and needs. Honesty is necessary for a good relationship with anyone. When we lie to ourselves, we cannot tell the truth to others. By being honest, we open our doors to others, we trust them with our true feelings, and they love us for who we really are. Who can I tell how I really feel today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. --Ralph Waldo Emerson After we get a new understanding about ourselves we think, "Now I will never have to make the same mistake again!" But our lessons are usually not that easily learned. We have to get them into our muscles and bones as well as our heads. Some of us have to learn how to be kind; others, how to be good listeners or how to stand up for ourselves in many different ways. Every new situation calls on a little different way of knowing, and perhaps we have to fall a few times in the learning. The most important asset in our lives is the faith to get up again and continue. We must accept our imperfections. Each time we fall and with each mistake we make, we're vulnerable to doubting and losing faith. By rising again, we make progress in our learning and continue to become better men. Today, I will have faith, even in the midst of my mistakes. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships. --Barbara Grizzuti Harrison Relationships with other people are necessary to escape loneliness; however, relationships do not guarantee freedom from pain. Nurturing a meaningful relationship with another human being takes patience, even when we don't have any. It takes tolerance, even if we don't feel it. It takes selflessness, at those very moments our own ego is crying for attention. Yet, we need relationships with others; they inspire us. We learn who we are and who we can become through relationships. They precipitate our accomplishments. Our creativity is encouraged by them, and so is our emotional and spiritual development. We can look around us, attentively. We can feel blessed, even when it's a negative situation. Every situation is capable of inspiring a positive step forward. Every situation is meant for our good. There's risk in human relationships, and it's often accompanied by pain. But I am guaranteed growth, and I will find the happiness I seek. I will reach out to someone today. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Moving On Learn the art of acceptance. It's a lot of grief. --Codependent No More Sometimes, as part of taking care of ourselves, it becomes time to end certain relationships. Sometimes, it comes time to change the parameters of a particular relationship. This is true in love, in friendships, with family, and on the job. Endings and changes in relationships are not easy. But often, they are necessary. Sometimes, we linger in relationships that are dead, out of fear of being alone or to postpone the inevitable grieving process that accompanies endings. Sometimes, we need to linger for a while, to prepare ourselves, to get strong and ready enough to handle the change. If that is what we are doing, we can be gentle with ourselves. It is better to wait until that moment when it feels solid, clear, and consistent to act. We will know. We will know. We can trust ourselves. Knowing that a relationship is changing or is about to end is a difficult place to be in, especially when it is not yet time to act but we know the time is drawing near. It can be awkward and uncomfortable, as the lesson draws to a close. We may become impatient to put closure on it, but not yet feel empowered to do that. That's okay. The time is not yet right. Something important is still happening. When the time is right, we can trust that it will happen. We will receive the power and the ability to do what we need to do. Ending relationships or changing the boundaries of a particular relationship is not easy. It requires courage and faith. It requires a willingness on our part to take care of ourselves and, sometimes, to stand-alone for a while. Let go of fear. Understand that change is an important part of recovery. Love yourself enough to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and find enough confidence to believe that you will love again. We are never starting over. In recovery, we are moving forward in a perfectly planned progression of lessons. We will find ourselves with certain people - in love, family, friendships, and work - when we need to be with them. When the lesson has been mastered, we will move on. We will find ourselves in a new place, learning new lessons, with new people. No, the lessons are not all painful. We will arrive at that place where we can learn, not from pain, but from joy and love. Our needs will get met. Today, I will accept where I am in my relationships, even if that place is awkward and uncomfortable. If I am in the midst of endings, I will face and accept my grief. God, help me trust that the path I am on has been perfectly and lovingly planned for me. Help me believe that my relationships are teaching me important lessons. Help me accept and be grateful for middles, endings, and new beginnings. Through prayer and meditation God guides me to the appropriate people for guidance in the important decisions I must make in my life. I trust my answers to be there when the time is right. --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Experience the Thrill of the Climb Don’t stop now. You’re almost there. You’ve worked so hard to climb this mountain. In the beginning, you were excited. Exhilarated at the prospect of the mountain you were about to climb. Now you are almost to the top. You’ve struggled, gotten weary, and kept going. Now, your goal is in sight. Keep going. Guidance is still there to help you. The life force, the one that keeps you going, keeps you moving forward, is still there too, burning brightly within you, charging all that you do with its energy. It is more difficult for you to feel it, but that is only because you’re tired. See the mountain climber as he climbs the mountain. There are dangers and precipices and challenges along the way. But the higher he climbs, the steeper it gets. The more tired he is, the more energy he has to put into the climb. Don’t tell yourself that the way you feel is an indication you should stop. The way you feel now is the way anyone would feel who was so deeply committed to life. It’s the way anyone would feel who had committed to climbing that mountain. Don’t stop now. Relax as much as you can. Knowing that the rhythm of life is still there, moving you forward. Don’t look back. Focus intently on each step. Soon you will reach the top. Soon you will reach your goal. Soon you will experience the victory. Keep your eyes focused on the path, look straight ahead. Embrace the thrill of the climb. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Let the adventure consume you The spirit of adventure settles over us slowly sometimes. In the beginning, when those old winds of change blow, we turn our backs, fight, and resist. We just want things to stay the same. Gradually we let go of the need to control. We allow things to change and us to change with them. We accept the change. Then we round the corner and find a wonderful lesson there, and then another, and another. Soon we find ourselves looking forward to taking the next step, anxious to see what lies in front of us today. Where will my path lead? Who will I meet? What will I learn? What wonderful lesson is taking place right now? And the adventure begins to consume us. The steps that you have been taking have been slowly leading you down a path with more wonder and goodness at every turn of the road. You learned to tolerate change. Now learn to embrace it. Adventure isn’t something you do. The adventure is your life. Recognize how sweet it is. Let those winds of change blow. God, help me cultivate a spirit of adventure in my life. *************************************** A Self-Created State Worry We have all had the experience of worrying about something at some point in our lives. Some of us have a habitual tendency to worry, and all of us have known someone who is a chronic worrier. Worry is an extension of fear and can be a very draining experience. In order for worry to exist, we have to imagine that something bad might happen. What we are worrying about has not happened yet, however, so this bad thing is by definition a fantasy. Understood this way, worry is a self-created state of needless fear. Still, most of us worry. One reason we worry is because we feel like we’re not in control. For example, you might worry about your loved ones driving home in bad weather. There is nothing you can do to guarantee their safe passage, but you worry until you find out they have reached their destination unharmed. In this instance, worry is an attempt to feel useful and in control. However, worrying does nothing to ensure a positive outcome and it has an unpleasant effect on your body, mind, and spirit. The good news is that there are ways to transform this kind of worry so that it has a healing effect. Just as worry uses the imagination, so does the antidote to worry. Next time you find that you are worrying, imagine the best result instead of anticipating the worst outcome. Visualize your loved ones’ path bathed in white light and clearly see in your mind’s eye their safe arrival. Imagine angels or guides watching over them as they make their way home. Generate peace and well-being instead of nervousn! ess and unease within yourself. Another reason we worry is that something that we know is pending but are avoiding is nagging us—an unpaid parking ticket, an upcoming test, an issue with a friend. In these cases, acknowledging that we are worried and taking action is the best solution. If you can confront the situation and own your power to change it, you’ll have no reason to worry. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The success of The Program, i’ve been taught, lies in large measure in the readiness and willingness of its members to go to any lengths to help others tyrannized by their addictions. If my readiness and willingness cools, then I stand in danger of losing all that I’ve gained. I must never become unwilling to give away what I have, for only by so doing will I be privileged to keep it. Do I take to heart the saying, “Out of self into God into others…”? Today I Pray May I never be too busy to answer a fellow addict’s call for help. May I never become so wound up in my pursuits that I forget that my own continuing recovery depends on that helping — a half-hour or so on the telephone, a call in person, a lunch date, whatever the situation calls for. May I know what my priorities must be. Today I Will Remember Helping helps me. *************************************** One More Day The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. – Jack London We are on a remarkable journey that holds wonderful possibilities. Sometimes people who have undergone a crisis think they have arrived at the end of the journey. The excitement of living decreases each day. Surrounding ourselves with loving, caring people gives us the greatest chance of coming out of the depression caused by our problems. Also, treating ourselves gently can improve our outlook. When we show loving care for others and ourselves, we will once again be moving back into the mainstream of life. We will be filled once again with the excitement and joy of the journey that lies ahead. I owe myself the excitement of each day to come. Today, I will savor my life. ************************************ Food For Thought Working Compulsively We do not want to turn from compulsive overeating to compulsive working. This, too, is an attempt to escape reality. Compulsive working holds a particular danger for us, since when we allow ourselves to get overtired, we run the risk of breaking our abstinence. Working compulsively includes the fear that what we do will not be good enough. It is when we are unsure of our self worth that we have to continually prove how much we can accomplish. Compulsive work is also a way to avoid meaningful relationships with family and friends. If we fear intimacy and exposure, we sometimes try to hide behind a facade of busyness. When God controls our will and our lives, we work according to His direction. We have the faith that what we do will be acceptable and enough. Believing that God cares for us, we do not rely only on our own abilities. Working for a Higher Power means that we work with serenity and confidence, knowing that He directs and sustains our efforts. Teach me how to work productively for You. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~GRATITUDE FOR ADVERSITY ~ He was my greatest teacher. He taught me patience. The Dalai Lama on Mao Tse Tung Whenever I feel downtrodden or disappointed by the hand that life has dealt me, I often think of this quote. It moves me beyond speech. Here was a man who had lost his homeland to communist China, yet he still had a good thing to say about the man who started it all. It forces me to come to a realization that what has happened to me is peanuts! Too often I am caught up with feeling sorry for myself because of my disease, while ignoring the fact that I am so fortunate to have found recovery. Sometimes I feel so poor, yet I live in a large home with a wonderful spouse and delightful pets. I have a car, and enough food to eat every day. I have the luxury of obtaining my degree. Most of all, though I often complain about how unfair it all is, I am even fortunate to have an eating disorder. Because it is through admitting I have a problem that I am beginning to taste recovery, and it is sweeter than any binge item. And it has taught me that it is through our adversities that we learn compassion and patience. I have to realize that life just isn't fair. If it were, how boring it would be! Nothing worthwhile is easy to obtain, and that includes recovery. What would it be worth if there was no effort going into it? Sometimes bad things happen, and they are unfortunate. But that's the end of it. I cannot make things be the way I want them to be. I cannot change life. I must accept life on life's terms, and learn the art of patience, so well demonstrated by the above quote. How fortunate that I have the opportunity to learn these precious skills in the safety and security of my own home, with my wonderful friends, spouse, and my program family! One Day at a Time . . . I will avoid dwelling on the misery that accompanies hardship. I will develop the willingness to be grateful for the opportunity for me to learn compassion and patience. Claire ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote However intelligent we may have been in other respects, where alcohol has been involved, we have been strangely insane. It's strong language - but isn't it true? - Pg. 38 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You will probably misjudge and misunderstand many people and their motives for a time. The muddled thinking of early recovery has a way of making us take things the wrong way. Remember your vulnerability and that withdrawal distorts thinking. Don't be hard on yourself or those around you. Do nothing permanent for eight months to a year. This way your regrets will be minimized. God, as I understand You, hold my tongue from uttering words and restrain my steps from moving in directions that I may one day regret. Body Memories Understanding and thought are distributed throughout all the cells in my body. Who I am is stored in my physical self. My body carries memory and knowledge about how I have responded to the circumstances of my life, about what I brought into this world to begin with.. Today when I think positively, I will allow and invite my entire body to carry a positive thought. I will instruct each cell within me to be active, healthy and vibrant. Each time that I feel I am getting low on reserves, I will open all of my body to receiving uplifting light and energy from the universe. I am not a talking head. I am a body, mind and spirit, alive in all of me. I ask my body to wake up and live. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote If you are clean and sober, the miracle has already happened. Stick around, the impossibilities take a little longer. Nothing is impossible in God's world. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Prevent truth decay-read your Big Book. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Through prayer and meditation God guides me to the appropriate people for guidance in the important decisions I must make in my life. I trust my answers to be there when the time is right. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Give me your hand o brother mine and even I may help you up. - Henry Lawson.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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December 30
Daily Reflections ANONYMITY Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 564 Tradition Twelve became important early in my sobriety and, along with the Twelve Steps, it continues to be a must in my recovery. I became aware after I joined the Fellowship that I had personality problems, so that when I first heard it, the Tradition's message was very clear: there exists an immediate way for me to face, with others, my alcoholism and attendant anger, defensiveness, offensiveness. I saw Tradition Twelve as being a great ego-deflator; it relieved my anger and gave me a chance to utilize the principles of the program. All of the Steps, and this particular Tradition, have guided me over decades of continuous sobriety. I am grateful to those who were here when I needed them. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day To the extent that I fail in my responsibilities, A.A. fails. To the extent that I succeed, A.A. succeeds. Every failure of mine will set back A.A. work to that extent. Every success of mine will put A.A. ahead to that extent. I shall not wait to be drafted for service to others, but I shall volunteer. I shall accept every opportunity to work for A.A. as a challenge, and I shall do my best to accept every challenge and perform my task as best I can. Will I accept every challenge gladly? Meditation For The Day People are always failures in the deepest sense when they seek to live without God's sustaining power. Many people try to be self-sufficient and seek selfish pleasure and find that it does not work too well. No matter how much material wealth they acquire, no matter how much fame and material power, the time of disillusionment and futility usually comes. Death is ahead, and they cannot take any material thing with them when they go. What does it matter if I have gained the whole world, but lost my own soul? Prayer For The Day I pray that I will not come empty to the end of my life. I pray that I may so live that I will not be afraid to die. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It We Cannot Stand Still, p. 25 In the first days of A.A., I wasn't much bothered about the areas of life in which I was standing still. There was always the alibi: "After all," I said to myself, "I'm far too busy with much more important matters." That was my near perfect prescription for comfort and complacency. << << << >> >> >> How many of us would presume to declare, "Well, Im sober and I'm happy. What more can I want, or do? I'm fine the way I am." We know that the price of such self-satisfaction is an inevitable backslide, punctuated at some point by a very rude awakening. We have to grow or else deteriorate. For us, the status quo can only be today, never for tomorrow. Change we must; we cannot stand still. 1. Grapevine, June 1961 2. Grapevine, February 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Maturity means principles Right Action A principle is sometimes defined as a fundamental guide to action. The more mature we become, the more likely it is that we'll work from principles rather than blind feelings. The principles outlined in the Twelve Steps are good guide for mature living. They call for honesty in motive, fair and considerate treatment of others, and reliance on our Higher Power throughout each day. As we continue on such a path, we will outgrow the childish selfishness and reactions that were so destructive in our old lives. We will be viewed by others as mature, responsible, reliable people. We also grow into maturity by acting according to sound principles even when we don't always feel like it. Whatever our feelings might be at any given moment, we can choose actions that are sound and constructive. Whatever my feelings might be from moment to moment, I"ll act according to the best principles today. I know this is a part of growing up. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Keep It Simple.---AA slogan Addiction messed up our thinking. We know that from taking Step One. We forgot things. We had blackouts. We made excuses, and we even started to believe them. We were mixed up. We couldn't figure things out. We decided to get high and forget about it. Now our minds are clear. We can keep thinking clearly if we work our program and Keep It Simple. Don't drink or use other drugs. Go to meetings. Work the Steps. Be yourself. Ask for help. Trust your Higher Power. Two thoughts will always mess us up if we let them in. They are "Yes, but..." and "What if?" Don't let them in. Keep It Simple. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks for recovery. Help me stay sober and clean today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll take one thing at a time and Keep It Simple. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning And what a delight it is to make friends with someone you have despised! --Colette What does it mean to say we "despise" someone? Usually it means that we have invested a lot of energy in negative feelings; it means that we have let ourselves care deeply about someone. We would never say we "despised" someone who wasn't important to us. Why have we chosen to let negative feelings occupy so much of our hearts? Sometimes, in the past, that negative energy has become almost an obsession, consuming our time, gnawing at our self-esteem. But in recovery there comes a moment of lightning change; a moment of release from the bonds of obsession. The other person is, after all, just another person--a seeker, like ourselves. And, since we cared enough to devote our time and energies to disliking her, she is probably someone who would be rewarding to know. Recovery has given us the opportunity to turn over many negative feelings, to discover that "friend" and "enemy" can be two sides of the same person. Today, I will look into my heart and see whether I am clinging to obsessive concerns with other people. I will resolve to let them go. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY An alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature. Our struggles with them are variously strenuous, comic, and tragic. One poor chap committed suicide in my home. He could not, or would not, see our way of life. There is, however, a vast amount of fun about it all. I suppose some would be shocked at our seeming worldliness and levity. But just underneath there is deadly earnestness. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish. Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia. We have it with us right here and now. Each day my friend's simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men. Bill W., co-founder of A.A., died January 24, 1971. p. 16 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Because I'm An Alcoholic This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?" When I asked her if I was an alcoholic, she said that from what she'd seen of my drinking I might be and suggested that I talk with her boss. Terrified, I made an appointment and kept it. She told me the symptoms of alcoholism, and I had them all. She gave me a list of A.A. meetings and recommended one. pp. 343-344 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Also of importance for most alcoholics are the questions they must ask about their behavior respecting financial and emotional security. In these areas fear, greed, possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst. Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill me with conflict? Did I try to cover up those feelings of inadequacy by bluffing, cheating, lying, or evading responsibility? Or by griping that others failed to recognize my truly exceptional abilities? Did I overvalue myself and play the big shot? Did I have such unprincipled ambition that I double-crossed and undercut my associates? Was I extravagant? Did I recklessly borrow money, caring little whether it was repaid or not? Was I a pinch penny, refusing to support my family properly? Did I cut corners financially? What about the "quick money" deals, the stock market, and the races? p. 51 ************************************************** ********* Don't hate - it's too big a burden to bear. --Martin Luther King, Sr. Never be afraid to entrust the unknown future to the all-knowing God." --unknown "We may not know what the future holds, but we know who holds the future." --unknown God can make all things new, even you. --unknown When you find you are upset over a situation, stop and ask yourself one very important question. "Is this something I can change?" Whether it is or not, turn your negative energy in to productive energy. You can either change the situation, or change your perspective of the situation. --unknown You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips. --Oliver Goldsmith You cannot raise a man up by calling him down. --William Boetcker Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. --Will Rogers ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BALANCE "A society that gives to one class all the opportunities for leisure, and to another class all the burdens of work, dooms both classes to spiritual sterility." -- Lewis Mumford Spirituality brings with it balance. In order to be relaxed, healthy and alive, I need both work and leisure. For me I need to remember it is okay to take a day off; to stay in and relax is not a waste; play time is creative time! I was not only compulsive around alcohol and people but I was also obsessive about work. I was and am a work-aholic. I need to remember to H.A.L.T.: Don't get too Hungry. Don't get too Angry. Don't get too Lonely. Don't get too Tired. Work for me can be a form of escape. In leisure I have the opportunity to meet with myself. Go on enjoy yourself, with yourself! You, who made me a laborer in the vineyard, also expected me to sit and enjoy it. ************************************************** ********* "I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:10 "Do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12:1-3 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Begin every day as if it were your very first because you really are always at the beginning. Lord, thank you for the constant ability to stop any offensive behaviors that I have and the gift of being forgiven and being able to forgive myself. Imagine that you were paid for every kindness and charged for every unkindness. Would you be rich or poor? Lord, I often pray for material wealth. Let me not neglect my soul by now praying for the ability to build my spiritual wealth also. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Action And Prayer "... growth is not the result of wishing but of action and prayer" Basic Text, pp. 35-36 Sometimes it seems as if our recovery is growing much too slowly. We struggle with the steps; we wrestle with the same problems; we labor under the same uncomfortable feelings day after day. We wish that recovery would move a little faster so we could find some comfort! Wishing doesn't work in recovery; this isn't a program of magic. If wishes cured addiction, we all would have been well long ago! What does give us relief in recovery is action and prayer. Narcotics Anonymous has worked for so many addicts because it is a carefully designed program of action and prayer. The actions we undertake in each of the steps bring more and more recovery to each area of our lives. And prayer keeps us connected to our Higher Power. Together, action and prayer keep us well-grounded in recovery. Just for today: My recovery is too precious to just wish about it. Today is a good day for action and prayer. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Telling the truth is a pretty hard thing. --Thomas Wolfe Lying can be like sailing choppy waters. The more we lie, the higher the waves get, and the harder the sailing. When we lie, we feel we've failed ourselves and others. We have to work hard to cover up our lies, and the fear of someone finding out is always with us. If we ask God for courage to tell the truth, we can be like the sailboat on a clear and calm day. We can enjoy the small waves and the light warm breeze we've given ourselves. Honesty is a good habit, and is easy. With a little faith in our own worth, we can choose the calm waters' honesty and apply our creativity to new, growth-oriented activities instead of covering up old mistakes. How can I smooth my waters right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. When we are reduced to our last extreme, there is no further evasion. The choice is a terrible one. It is made in the heart of darkness ... when we who have been destroyed and seem to be in hell miraculously choose God! --Thomas Merton There are many ways we benefit from a life crisis. Perhaps none of us could achieve true adult maturity - or a relationship with God - without having the foundations of our lives shaken. One of our pathways to crisis was the willful pursuit of control in our codependent and addictive lives. Our lifestyles were extreme, the consequences were extreme, and our surrender had to be absolute. Most of us are surprised by how our weaknesses can turn to strengths. When our defiant wills led us to the utter bottom of our despair, we finally turned to a Power greater than ourselves and found a new way to live. This spiritual story is told in endless variations in our meetings, and it is renewed in small ways every day in each of our lives. God, lift my defiant willfulness from me and renew my day. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. And what a delight it is to make friends with someone you have despised! --Colette What does it mean to say we "despise" someone? Usually it means that we have invested a lot of energy in negative feelings; it means that we have let ourselves care deeply about someone. We would never say we "despised" someone who wasn't important to us. Why have we chosen to let negative feelings occupy so much of our hearts? Sometimes, in the past, that negative energy has become almost an obsession, consuming our time, gnawing at our self-esteem. But in recovery there comes a moment of lightning change; a moment of release from the bonds of obsession. The other person is, after all, just another person--a seeker, like ourselves. And, since we cared enough to devote our time and energies to disliking her, she is probably someone who would be rewarding to know. Recovery has given us the opportunity to turn over many negative feelings, to discover that "friend" and "enemy" can be two sides of the same person. Today, I will look into my heart and see whether I am clinging to obsessive concerns with other people. I will resolve to let them go. You are reading from the book The Language Of Letting Go. Laying the Foundation The groundwork has been laid. Do you not see that? Don't you understand that all you have gone through was for a purpose? There was a reason, a good reason, for the waiting, the struggle, the pain, and finally the release. You have been prepared. The same way a builder must first tear down and dig out the old to make way for the new, your Higher Power has been cleaning out the foundation in your life. Have you ever watched a builder at construction? When he begins his work, it looks worse than before he began. What is old and decayed must be removed. What is insufficient or too weak to support the new structure must be removed, replaced, or reinforced. No builder who cares about his or her work would put a new surface over an insufficient support system. The foundation would give way. It would not last. If the finished product is to be what is desired, the work must be done thoroughly from the bottom up. As the work progresses, it often appears to be an upheaval. Often, it does not seem to make sense. It may appear to be wasted time and effort, because we cannot see the final product yet. But it is so important that the foundation be laid properly if the fun work, the finishing touches, is to be all that we want it to be. This long, hard time in your life has been for laying of groundwork. It was not without purpose, although at times the purpose may not have been evident or apparent. Now, the foundation has been laid. The structure is solid. Now, it is time for the finishing touches, the completion. It is time to move the furniture in and enjoy the fruits of the labor. Congratulations. You have had the patience to endure the hard parts. You have trusted, surrendered, and allowed your Higher Power and the Universe to heal and prepare you. Now, you shall enjoy the good that has been planned. Now, you shall see the purpose. Now, it shall all come together and make sense. Enjoy. Today, I will surrender to the laying of the foundation - the groundwork - in my life. If it is time to enjoy the placement of the finishing touches, I will surrender to that, and enjoy that too. I will remember to be grateful for a Higher Power that is a Master Builder and only has my best interests in mind, creating and constructing my life. I will be grateful for my Higher Power's care and attention to details in laying the foundation - even though I become impatient at times. I will stand in awe at the beauty of God's finished product. It feels so good to help other people and to know that I have something to give them. It feels so good to have turned my own life around so that it can benefit others. (Author's note: Please know that we all have so much to give. The world really needs us recovering folks now. We have been given an extraordinary gift of a way of life second to none, and as we continue to grow spiritually, we do make a difference in the world.) --Ruth Fishel *************************************** Journey To The Heart Joy Is Your Next Lesson Learning compassion, understanding love, and experiencing joy. That’s our purpose, our reason for being here. That’s our true mission on this planet. Learning compassion may have been difficult, because in order to feel compassion for others without judging, we had to go through difficult times ourselves. Times when despite our best efforts we couldn’t help ourselves, times when despite our searching we couldn’t find the answers. As many say, it is usually our own pain and problems that makes us compassionate. Understanding love may have taken many years, many heartbreaks, and much searching and grasping until we discovered that the key to love was our own heart. Until we discovered that love wasn’t exactly what we thought or hoped it would be. Now it’s different. And better. Don’t give up. Don’t stop now. Don’t let the residue, the pain from the early parts of your journey, stop you from going forward. We first had to learn about compassion and love in order to learn joy. The hard work is done. Now you have reached your reward. Now it is time to learn joy. *************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Slow down and let go On a road trip up the California coast a while back, I tried to call home only to find that the batteries in my cell phone had died. I worried. What if someone needed to get in touch with me? What if there was a problem with the house? What if my family couldn’t find me and got worried? I passed the exit to the beach that I had always wanted to see. I obessed some more. I stopped for breakfast at a restaurant overlooking the Pacific Ocean. I asked if they had a pay phone. They didn’t. I barely noticed the stunning view, the smell or the sound of the surf, and I can’t remember eating my eggs and toast. I put off seeing things until another trip; I took the freeway and got home early. When I got home, there were no messages. No one had needed me; no one had even been aware that I was gone. But I had missed out on the treasures of the trip. I had spent so much time obsessing, I could barely remember where I’d been. Are you missing out on the wonder of your trip because you’re in too big of a hurry? Let go. Breathe deeply. As long as you’re taking the journey, you might as well relax and enjoy the ride. God, help me enjoy where I am right now. *************************************** The Ways We Love Choosing to Have a Mate or Being Single The way we choose to love can be as unique as the way we choose to make a living, maintain our health, or entertain ourselves. Some choose to seek out a mate and enter into a partnership with a special individual, while others find immense satisfaction in staying single. There is no right or wrong way to be in your life when it comes to deciding whether or not to be in a relationship, even though society tends to put an emphasis on romantic partnerships. Whether you choose to go through life as part of a romantic relationship or live as a single unit, there are benefits to both. Feel free to be comfortable with whatever choice is right for you. Choosing to be single is a wonderful way to spend time discovering yourself. You have more time and space to figure out what and how you want your life to be without having to keep someone else’s choices in mind. Being single gives you the freedom to do what you want at a moment’s notice and the pride that comes with facing life on your own terms. Companionship, support, and affection can be found while spending quality time with friends, colleagues, and relatives. There is also the fun that comes with being able to date many different people without having to make a commitment. Choosing to have a mate, on the other hand, brings with it an opportunity to share your life with another person. There is comfort in the knowledge that you are facing the world with someone as a united front. When life is challenging, you are in a position to strengthen, as well as give each other comfort. There is also the inevitable transformation of self that comes from allowing another person t! o so intimately be a part of your life. Remember that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and people can transition between wanting to be with another person and wanting to be alone many times over the course of their lives. Whether you seek out a mate or live the single life, embracing it fully will ensure that either choice is as fulfilling as possible for you. Published with permission from Daily OM *************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day My life before coming to The Program was not unlike the lives of so many of us who were cruelly buffeted and tormented by the power of our addictions. For years, I had been sick and tired. When I became sick and tired of being sick and tired, I finally surrendered and came to The Program. Now I realize that I had been helped all along by a Higher Power; it was He, indeed, who allowed me to live so that I could eventually find a new way of life. Since my awakening, have I found a measure of serenity previously unknown in my life. Today I Pray May I realize that my Higher Power has not suddenly come into my life like a stranger opening a door when I knocked. The Power has been there all along, if I will just remember how many brushes with disaster I have survived by a fraction of time or distance. Now that I have come to know my Higher Power better, I realize that I must have been saved from something — for helping others like me. Today I Will Remember I am grateful to be alive and recovering. *************************************** One More Day To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness. – Robert Muller When we are trying to cope with a newly diagnosed illness, feelings may be hurt a little too easily, especially when we feel slighted by the very people we feel should understand. We probably are more vulnerable to hurt at first, and we may even at times feel sorry for ourselves. There comes a time, however, when we can see the futility of carrying old grudges. There’s no longer a need to know or prove who was right and who was wrong. As we’ve learned to cope with our illness, we’ve become emotionally stronger — strong enough to let go of anger and to forgive. The more we forgive, the calmer and more serene we will become, until ultimately our reward will be inner peace and trust. I can let go of past hurts. I can bridge the gap caused by misunderstandings. ************************************ Food For Thought Fear of Failure It is often the fear of failure, which prevents us from attempting what we really want to do. When we are new to OA, we may be reluctant to commit ourselves to abstinence because we fear we will break it. When we are able to maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating, we may be afraid to make some other kind of commitment for fear of not being able to succeed. Our past failures can undermine our confidence in our present abilities. For this reason, we need to let go of the past and be willing to try something new. For many of us, belief in a Higher Power is a new commitment. The fear that we will be disappointed sometimes blocks us from the wholehearted trust that such a commitment entails. The fear of failure is best dealt with by living one day at a time. We can risk a small failure today; it is the large failure in the future that terrifies us. By taking a small step today toward maintaining abstinence or working on an important project, we build the confidence that we can eventually succeed. With Your support, may I be willing to risk failure. ***************************************** One Day At A Time WILLINGNESS Yet we finally did make choices that brought about our recovery. We came to believe that alone we were powerless over [food]. This was surely a choice, and a most difficult one. We came to believe that a Higher Power could restore us to sanity when we became willing to practice [program's] twelve steps. In short, we chose to 'become willing,' and no better choice did we ever make." from "As Bill Sees It" I floundered in program for a good while. I was not willing to do the Fourth Step; it scared me. Then I did it, and recovery continued. I floundered in program again. I was not willing to do the extra work I knew I would have to do to stay in the program. I was scared of being a sponsor, so I left. The disease gradually took me over. I came back to program. This time I was willing. No longer did the phrase "going to any lengths" scare me. I knew I needed to do whatever it took. The disease had beaten me down to where I had no choice if I wanted to recover. I took the steps ... all the steps. I became a sponsor. I also discovered that abstinence is only the beginning of recovery - that life is joyful and free. It all began with willingness on my part. I didn't have the power to change my life, but my Higher Power was able to change it once I became willing to follow the Twelve Steps to the best of my ability. One Day at a Time . . . I will ask for and receive the willingness to work this program. ~ Julie ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote HAPPY NEW YEAR! A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, 'a design for living' that really works. - Pg.28 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Life is not fair. You see it in the headlines; you see it in people racked with chronic pain; you see it in senseless street violence and children starving in third world countries. It will be a challenge for you in the coming weeks to understand it is not an unfair thing that has just happened, addiction and then recovery, but the greatest fight you shall ever receive. I do not know why good people suffer addiction. It is the very act of not understanding and still trusting in the good of the universe that comprises the very essence of faith. Life is a Spiritual Journey No one can learn the alphabet for me. And no one can develop wisdom, appreciation or inner strength for me. These are things I have to do for myself. What is life but growth and expansion, increasing my understanding so that I can deepen my experience of feeling alive? There are gifts in healing if I am willing to see them, lessons I can learn, awareness's that I need in order to appreciate what I already have. Sickness can be my teacher if I let it. Even as I wait for strength to return to my body, still my spirit and my character can grow stronger and better and more refined. I am not doing nothing as I lie here, I am growing on the inside. Today I will use this moment that puts me into a deeper part of myself to come in contact with an openness to grow. I am in touch with a part of life that I normally don't get in touch with. I am understanding and expanding my inner world. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When you can't find the solution to a problem, look for the soulution to the problem. I keep whispering my heart's desires because I never know when my angel is listening. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The program is for participants, not spectators. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It feels so good to help other people and to know that I have something to give them. It feels so good to have turned my own life around so that it can benefit others. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote We must think of all those sick ones still to come to AA. As they try to make their return to faith and to life, we want them to find everything in AA that we have found, and yet more, if that be possible. No care, no vigilance, no effort to preserve AA's constant effectiveness will ever be too great to hold us in full readiness for the day of their homecoming. Bill W. 1959.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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