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11-06-2024, 04:13 AM | #16 |
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 73,710
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Daily Reflections A DAILY REPRIEVE What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85 Maintaining my spiritual condition is like working out every day, planning for the marathon, swimming laps, jogging. It's staying in good shape spiritually, and that requires prayer and meditation. The single most important way for me to improve my conscious contact with a Higher Power is to pray and meditate. I am as powerless over alcohol as I am to turn back the waves of the sea; no human force had the power to overcome my alcoholism. Now I am able to breathe the air of joy, happiness and wisdom. I have the power to love and react to events around me with the eyes of a faith in things that are not readily apparent. My daily reprieve means that, no matter how difficult or painful things appear today, I can draw on the power of the program to stay liberated from my cunning, baffling and powerful illness. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have got rid of most of my inner conflicts. I was always at war with myself. I was doing things that I did not want to do. I was waking up in strange places and wondering how I got there. I was full of recklessness when I was drunk and full of remorse when I was sober. My life didn't make sense. It was full of broken resolves and frustrated hopes and plans. I was getting nowhere fast. No wonder my nerves were all shot. I was bumping up against a blank wall and I was dizzy from it. A.A. taught me how to get organized and to stop fighting against myself. Have I got rid of inner conflicts? Meditation For The Day "When two or three are gathered together in My name, there am I in the midst of them." The spirit of God comes upon His followers when they are all together at one time, in one place, and with one accord. When two or three consecrated souls are together at a meeting place, the spirit of God is there to help and guide them. Where any sincere group of people are together, reverently seeking the help of God, His power and His spirit are there to inspire them. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be in accord with the members of my group. I pray that I may feel the strength of a consecrated group. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Forgiveness, p. 318 Through the vital Fifth Step, we began to get the feeling that we could be forgiven, no matter what we had thought or done. Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors or spiritual advisers that we first felt truly able to forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had wronged us. Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all-round forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too. 12 & 12, pp. 57-58 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Continuing to follow A child learning to ride a bicycle discovers that it only take gentle pedaling to keep the bike in motion. The more difficult task was getting on the bike and maintaining a straight course in the right direction. Staying sober in AA seems to be the same kind of thing. It may take a lot of effort and self-honesty to establish sobriety, but a routine of simple steps can keep it going on a daily basis. For most people, daily meditations and regular attendance at meetings are enough to maintain a straight course in the right direction. The danger comes when people become too lazy or careless to take even these simple steps. Then, like a bike losing forward momentum, they can wobble and fall. Even at the point of wobbling, one can get a bike up to speed again and gain stability. This is something to remember if we find our own sobriety becoming wobbly. Nothing can be so important today that it keeps me from doing the simple things needed for continuous sobriety. I'll remember the bike. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Pray for powers equal to your task.---Phillips Brooks Our task is to stay sober and to help others who still suffer from addiction. We will need patience and understanding. We will need much love. Most of all, we’ll need to work a strong program. Pray that you come to know the Steps well. Pray that you’ll want to help others---always. Pray for these things, and you’ll have a strong program. In the program, we learn that prayer works. We see prayer change our lives and the lives of those around us. We came to know the power of prayer. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I pray for knowledge of Your will for me and the power to carry it out. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll admit my needs by praying for help from my Higher Power. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Rigidity is prevented most of the time as love and compassion mesh us into tolerant human beings. --Kaethe S. Crawford Looking outward with love, offering it freely to our friends and family, makes fluid, flowing, and fertile our existence. Each expression of love engenders more love, keeping tender our ties to one another, encouraging more ties. The more flexible our lives, the more easily we'll be attracted to an unexpected opportunity. And flexibility is fostered by a loving posture. As we approach the world, so it greets us. We are not mere recipients of life's trials and tribulations. We find what our eyes are wanting to see. When our focus is rigid and narrow, so are our opportunities. The Steps are leading us to be freer with our love, more tolerant in our expectations. The level of our compassion, fully felt and fully expressed, is the measure of our emotional health. Rigid attitudes, rigid behavior, rigid expectations of others recede as the level of our emotional health rises. Our approach to life changes and so do the results we meet. I will love others. It's my only assignment in life, and it guarantees the security I crave. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Twenty-two, and a veteran of foreign wars, I went home at last. I fancied myself a leader, for had not the men of my battery given me a special token of appreciation? My talent for leadership, I imagined, would place me at the head of vast enterprises which I would manage with the utmost assurance. p. 1 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Student Of Life Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold. It is almost impossible to adequately describe how much the program has given me, even in just these six short years. I have been financially supporting myself in my own apartment for five years and plan to buy a house next year. I've secured a good job with a promising future--my income has increased more than 150 percent since I got sober. p. 327 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Two - "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Now let's take the guy full of faith, but still reeking of alcohol. He believes he is devout. His religious observance is scrupulous. He's sure he still believes in God, but suspects that God doesn't believe in him. He takes pledges and more pledges. Following each, he not only drinks again, but acts worse than the last time. Valiantly he tries to fight alcohol, imploring God's help, but the help doesn't come. What, then, can be the matter? pp. 31-32 ************************************************** ********* Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. --Dr. Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965) If I have the opportunity to help one person today, I'll have done something worthwhile if I've helped at least one person today. --RJabo3 Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching? --unknown Joy isn't the absence of pain -- it's the presence of God. --unknown A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change. "If you were walking back from a well, carrying a bucket of water & someone jostled you, there could be spilled from the bucket only that which it contained. As you walk along the way of life, people are constantly bumping into you. If your heart is full of ill nature, bad temper, and ugly disposition, only those things will be spilled from it. On the other hand, if it is full of love, you will spill a smile or pleasant remark. You can spill from your bucket only that which it contains." --Author Unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FRIENDSHIP "True friendship comes when silence between two people is comfortable." -- Dave Tyson Gentry Part of the spiritual life that awakens serenity is silence or stillness. "Be still and know that I am God." I believe that true friendship is divine. It is a special love that binds two hearts as one. It is a comfortableness that is the opposite of dis-ease. Friendship is necessary to recovery and it involves the sharing of feelings. Often the feelings are silent; unspoken emotions; cherished moments that exist in "word-less-ness". As a recovering alcoholic, I have a thousand friends who attest to the silent witness of love by simply being there. Thank You for the joy of friendship that grows in silence. ************************************************** ********* "The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end." Lamentations 3:22 God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. Romans 14:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Life is a challenge so accept it for what it truly is. Lord, help me face what today brings with energy, determination and a joy that allows me to take control. Pray about every task that you take on today and don't take on those tasks which you have no time to pray about. Lord, tonight I will rest well because today You and I will accomplish many things. Thank You for Your constant blessings in my life. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Alone No More "We gradually and carefully pull ourselves out of the isolation and loneliness of addiction and into the mainstream of life." Basic Text p. 35 Many of us spent much of our using time alone, avoiding other people - especially people who were not using - at all costs. After years of isolation, trying to find a place for ourselves in a bustling, sometimes boisterous fellowship is not always easy. We may still feel isolated, focusing on our differences rather than our similarities. The overwhelming feelings that often arise in early recovery-feelings of fear, anger, and mistrust-can also keep us isolated. We may feel like aliens but we must remember, the alienation is ours, not NA's. In Narcotics Anonymous, we are offered a very special opportunity for friendship. We are brought together with people who understand us like no one else can. We are encouraged to share with these people our feelings, our problems, our triumphs, and our failures. Slowly, the recognition and identification we find in NA bridge the lonely gap of alienation in our hearts. As we've heard it said - the program works, if we let it. Just for today: The friendship of other members of the fellowship is a life-sustaining gift. I will reach out for the friendship that's offered in NA, and accept it. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. One is forever throwing away substance for shadows. --Jennie Jerome Churchill Sometimes we trade possessions with our friends. Maybe we want to add to our collection, or perhaps we just do it to get someone to like us. But if we try to buy friendship, we'll be sad later when we realize we've lost a prized possession and not gained a friend. Our friendships come when we least expect them, often with people who have something in common with us. They will not be friendships we have to buy, but relationships to treasure and have for years. These friendships will teach us to respect ourselves and our friends. Am I making good friends, or bad trades? You are reading from the book Touchstones. A wise man never loses anything if he have himself. --Montaigne As recovering men, perhaps we have learned more fully what it means to have ourselves because we know the extremes of losing ourselves. In the past we weren't honest with others, or ourselves we didn't have our self-respect, and our compulsive actions violated our values. In that condition, we were incapable of believing in ourselves or of standing up for ourselves. Some of us felt like phonies or nobodies. In this program we pray for wisdom, and it comes to us as we take possession of ourselves. We develop a better match between our inner feelings and our outer actions. We become willing to make choices, and we are able to take a stand based on our personal feelings and hunches. The things we possess like our gadgets, our cars, or our audio equipment are just temporary. Our integrity, our selves, can never be taken from us. Today, I am grateful for the growing feeling within that who I am and what I believe is acceptable to me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Rigidity is prevented most of the time as love and compassion mesh us into tolerant human beings. --Kaethe S. Crawford Looking outward with love, offering it freely to our friends and family, makes fluid, flowing, and fertile our existence. Each expression of love engenders more love, keeping tender our ties to one another, encouraging more ties. The more flexible our lives, the more easily we'll be attracted to an unexpected opportunity. And flexibility is fostered by a loving posture. As we approach the world, so it greets us. We are not mere recipients of life's trials and tribulations. We find what our eyes are wanting to see. When our focus is rigid and narrow, so are our opportunities. The Steps are leading us to be freer with our love, more tolerant in our expectations. The level of our compassion, fully felt and fully expressed, is the measure of our emotional health. Rigid attitudes, rigid behavior, rigid expectations of others recede as the level of our emotional health rises. Our approach to life changes and so do the results we meet. I will love others. It's my only assignment in life, and it guarantees the security I crave. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. The Victim Trap The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr. We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves. We aren't helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power - not to change or control others, but to solve the problems that are ours to solve. Using each problem that comes our way to "prove" that life is hard and we are helpless - this is codependency. It's the victim trap. Life does not have to be difficult. In fact, it can be smooth. Life is good. We don't have to "awfulize" it, or ourselves. We don't have to live on the underside. We do have power, more power than we know, even in the difficult times. And the difficult times don't prove life is bad; they are part of the ups and downs of life; often, they work out for the best. We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances. Life is challenging. Sometimes, there's more pain than we asked for; sometimes, there's more joy than we imagined. It's all part of the package, and the package is good. We are not victims of life. We can learn to remove ourselves as victims of life. By letting go of our belief that life has to be hard and difficult, we make our life much easier. Today, God, help me let go of my belief that life is so hard, so awful, or so difficult. Help me replace that belief with a healthier, more realistic view. Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart It’s Safe to Open Your Heart You don’t have to be so afraid to love. You don’t have to fear losing your soul. You learned that lesson. It’s in the past. That doesn’t mean that people won’t try to control or manipulate you. Doesn’t mean that at times, you won’t try to control or manipulate them. Doesn’t mean that people with problems, agendas, addictions, and issues won’t sometimes come into your life. They may. But the lessons of the past are yours, yours to keep. It may take you a moment to remember, but you will. Be gentle with yourself. Open up slowly, carefully, as you’re able. It’s not that life and people are different, although how we see life and view people probably has changed. We’re different. We’ve learned about our powers. We’ve learned to take care of ourselves. We’ve learned how capable we really are. Don’t be so afraid to love. Now it’s time to learn about the powers of the heart. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Be persistent Earlier in this book, I talked about little drops of rain, over the years, could wear pockets and indentations into stones. I used this as an analogy to demonstrate how negative influences could wear away our resolve. It goes both ways. When I was first in recovery, one of the treatment center staff gave me one good quality about myself when I couldn’t see or find anything about myself to like. “You’re persistent,” he said. “Yes,” I thought. “You’re right. I am.” I also thought if I took one-half the energy I used doing destructive things and channeled it into doing positive activities, there wouldn’t be anything in the world I couldn’t do. Most of us are persistent. We persistently dwell. We have persistently tried to change what we cannot, usually a circumstance or someone else’s behavior. Take that energy, that persistence, that deoermination, that almost obsessive resolve, and persevere with the things you can do. Don’t push. Let go of concern about the seemingly impossible tasks in your life. Softly, steadily, like the rain, let your kind spirit naturally remove the obstacles in your path. Life is better when we flow. But sometimes it takes persistent flow to change the things we can. Enough water, persistently applied, can be more powerful than rock. God, grant me the courage to persevere and the strength to persist. ***** You are reading from the book Food for Thought. Alive to Truth Being alive to truth requires being in touch with ourselves and with our Higher Power. It requires that we value spiritual truth more than material things. We come to realize that the insights and emotional growth we gain through this program are more valuable than the things we used to think we had to have. Being alive to truth involves living each present moment. If we are obsessed with the past or preoccupied with the future, we will miss the truth of now. Today we can be who we are and give of our best in whatever situation we find ourselves. Our Higher Power promises that if we ask for truth, we shall receive it. It will be found when we seek it more than status, money, or physical comfort. When we are alive to truth, we are open to the source of Power, which will never let us down. Today, I will be alive to truth. ***** Leaving a Positive Footprint Blessing Space by Madisyn Taylor We can bless each space we enter leaving a sweet energetic footprint behind. Physical space acts like a sponge, absorbing the radiant of all who pass through it. And, more likely than not, the spaces we move through each day have seen many people come and go. We have no way of knowing whether the energy footprints left behind by those who preceded us will invigorate us or drain us. Yet we can control the energy footprint we leave behind for others. In blessing each space we enter, we orchestrate a subtle energy shift that affects not only our own experiences in that space but also the experiences of the individuals who will enter the space after us. While we may never see the effects our blessing has had, we can take comfort in the fact that we have provided grace for those that follow after us. When you bless a room or an entire building, you leave a powerful message of love and light for all those who will come after you. Your blessings thus have myriad effects on the environments through which you pass. Old, stagnant energy is cleared, creating a vacuum into which fresh and invigorating energy can freely flow. The space is thus rendered harmonious and nourishing, and it becomes a hub from which positive feelings are transmitted. Intent is the key component of the blessings you leave in your physical wake. If your intent involves using your own consciousness as a tool for selflessly spreading grace, your blessings will never go awry. Whether you feel more comfortable performing a solo blessing or prefer to call upon your spirit guides for assistance, visualize each space you enter becoming free of toxins, chaos, and negativity as you speak your blessing. Then imagine the resultant emptiness being replaced by pure, healing white light and loving energy. Even a quic! k mindful thought of love can bless a space. This type of blessing is cumulative and will grow each time you bestow it. Try blessing every home, business, and office you visit for an entire week and observing the effects of your goodwill. Your affirmative energy footprint will help brighten your day as you contemplate your blessing’s future impact on your siblings in humanity and your environment. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day We sometimes hear humility defined as the state of being “teachable.” In that sense, most of us in The Program who are able to stay free of active addiction have acquired at least a smattering of humility, or we never would have learned to stay away from the first drink, the first tranquilizer, the first “side bet,” and similar destructive acts for those of us who are powerless over our respective addictions. Do I see increasing humility as a pathway to continuing improvements? Today I Pray Now that I have made a start at developing humility, may I keep it up. May I open my self to the will of God and the suggestions of my friends in the group. May I remain teachable, confrontable, receptive and conscious that I must stay that way in order to be healthy. Today I Will Remember To remain confrontable. ************************************* One More Day The future is an opaque mirror. Anyone who tries to look into it sees nothing but the dim outlines of an old and worried face. – Jim Bishop Perhaps we spend too much time looking into mirrors and being critical of what we see. There is no stage in life when we are wholly contented with what we see, but as we mature we gradually recognize that our lives are multidimensional. Now we know that there will be periods of time when we are more pensive, more introspective — and times when life will just roll along, with no concern from us. Acceptance of our appearance gives us the time and energy to work on our inner selves. We look to the future by trying to prepare, and we live in the present by understanding that what we look like is not of important as what we do. Today, I will decide which changes can give me and others the most joy. ************************************ Food For Thought Alive To Truth Being alive to truth requires being in touch with ourselves and with our Higher Power. It requires that we value spiritual truth more than material things. We come to realize that the insights and emotional growth we gain through this program are more valuable than the things we used to think we had to have. Being alive to truth involves living each present moment. If we are obsessed with the past or preoccupied with the future, we will miss the truth of now. Today we can be who we are and give of our best in whatever situation we find ourselves. Our Higher Power promises that if we ask for truth, we shall we receive it. It will be found when we seek it more than status, or money, or physical comfort. When we are alive to truth, we let open the resource of Power which will never let us down. ***************************************** One Day At A Time HONESTY "Whatever games are played with us, we must play no games with ourselves, but deal in our privacy with the last honesty and truth." Ralph Waldo Emerson When I began to study step one in OA I learned that the principle behind the step was honesty. That was difficult for me because I had spent so much time lying to myself and others about my eating. I was so ashamed of my eating habits and behaviors that when asked about them, it never occurred to me to tell the truth. I couldn't conceive of being accepted, or even cared for, if anyone knew the truth. Then I came into the program and began to hear people share. The denial and shell of lies began to melt. For the first time I found myself in a fellowship where I felt like I could tell the truth because I was surrounded by people whose stories were similar to mine. Most importantly, the people in the fellowship loved me and cared for me when I told my truth, no matter how ugly it seemed to me. I call this the magic of the fellowship. It makes me want to be that kind of loving, caring person for the newcomer taking his or her first step. One day at a time... I will honestly confront the reality of my compulsive eating, knowing that I am in a fellowship where I am unconditionally loved and cared for. ~ Carolyn H. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that is it fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. - Pg. 66 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To insist stubbornly on holding to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs? May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions. Learning from Life There are no 'buts' today. I am what I am, others are what they are, life is what it is. I will not parenthesize my growth with a 'but' or hold back my forward-moving spirit with second-guesses. For today, I am living with things as they are. I am exactly where I am meant to be, learning what I need to learn. All I need do is move through situations with willingness to learn and openness to feel. When feelings are brought up, I can accept them as what is happening within me - no need to resist and analyze them. Transformation will happen in the moving through and the acceptance of them. I trust that my life is unfolding in such a way that what I need to learn will be before me. I am willing to learn. I see the 'table prepared.' - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote A temper will get us into trouble and pride will keep us there. I can't save my face and my butt at the same time. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book With the first three steps, you get the courage to work the rest. When you work the rest, you get rid of the garbage so you can work the first three. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Success consists of getting up one more time than you fall. - Anon
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11-10-2024, 05:42 AM | #17 |
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 73,710
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November 17
Daily Reflections OVERCOMING LONELINESS Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 90 The agonies and the void that I often felt inside occur less and less frequently in my life today. I have learned to cope with solitude. It is only when I am alone and calm that I am able to communicate with God, for He cannot reach me when I am in turmoil. It is good to maintain contact with God at all times, but it is absolutely essential that, when everything seems to go wrong, I maintain that contact through prayer and meditation. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Everyone has two personalities, a good and a bad. We are all dual personalities to some extent. When we were drinking, the bad personality was in control. We did things when we were drunk that we would never do when we were sober. When we sober up, we are different people. Then we wonder how we could have done the things we did. But we drink again, and again our bad side comes out. So we are back and forth, always in conflict with our other selves, always in a stew. This division of our selves is not good; we must somehow become unified. We do this by giving ourselves wholeheartedly to A.A. and to sobriety. Have I become unified? Meditation For The Day "Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of Thy Lord." These words are for many ordinary people whom the world may pass by, unrecognizing. Not to the world-famed, the proud, the wealthy, are these words spoken, but to the quiet followers who serve God unobtrusively yet faithfully, who bear their crosses bravely and put a smiling face to the world. "Enter into the joy of Thy Lord." Pass into that fuller spiritual life, which is a life of joy and peace. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not desire the world's applause. I pray that I may not seek rewards for doing what I believe is right. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Two Authorities, p. 319 Many people wonder how A.A. can function under a seeming anarchy. Other societies have to have law and force and sanction and punishment, administered by authorized people. Happily for us, we found that we need no human authority whatever. We have two authorities which are far more effective. One is benign, the other malign. There is God, our Father, who very simply says, "I am waiting for you to do my will." The other authority is named John Barleycorn, and he says, "You had better do God's will or I will kill you." << << << >> >> >> The A.A. Traditions are neither rules, regulations, nor laws. We obey them willingly because we ought to and because we want to. Perhaps the secret of their power lies in the fact that these life-giving communications spring out of living experience and are rooted in love. 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 105 2. A.A. Today, p. 11 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Are we doing well enough? Success Sometimes we can get off the track by mixing AA with the world's ideas of success. In AA, success means staying sober while using the AA principles in our daily affairs. We can be successful people in all walks of life. We should never think that a person is unsuccessful merely because he or she holds a low-paying job or has not regained any business or professional stature that has been lost. One of our members, for example, had once been the senior member of a lucrative law partnership before drinking himself into the gutter. In his sober years, he found great satisfaction in a relatively low- paying judgeship. In worldly terms, he could be seen as less successful. In AA terms, however, this period was the truly successful part of his life. Our Higher Power will show us where our place in life should be. That should be success enough for any of us. I'll do my best today in whatever job I have, grateful for the sobriety that helps me stay self-supporting and happy. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Mishaps are like knives that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle. ---Herman Melville We have hung on in hard times. We made it through our addiction. Some of us have lived through abuse. We’ve felt like our hearts were broken. But we’ve proven we are survivors. Now we’re learning that we can heal. Being recovery doesn’t mean things will be easy. But we have a Higher Power to help us. We have friends who listen to us, care for us, and help us through the pain. Because of our recovery program, we’re able to keep hope and love in our lives---One Day at a Time. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me through the hard times. Help me trust in Your love and care. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll plan ahead with my sponsor. What will I do now so that I’ll have strong support when hard times come? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I think happiness is like the effect on an audience (when acting), if you think of it all the time you will not get it, you must get lost in the part, lost in your purposes and let the effect be the criterion of your success. --Joanna Field Happiness is a gift that accompanies every instance of our lives if we approach each situation with gratitude, knowing that what's offered to us is special to our particular needs. The experiences we meet day to day are honing our Spirit, tempering our hard edges. For these we should offer gratitude. Our well-being is the gift. Deciding what will make us happy, in fact, what we must have to be happy, prevents us from grasping the unexpected pleasure of the "chance" events of the moment. When we intently look for what we think we need, we may well be blind to more beneficial opportunities God has chosen for us. Our self-centeredness hinders every breath we take. It prejudices every encounter. It stifles our creative potential. And most of all, it blocks any chance for a spontaneous reaction to the moment. Spontaneity is the breeding ground for creative living. And happiness is the byproduct. Happiness is my decision, every moment. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY I took a night law course, and obtained employment as an investigator for a surety company. The drive for success was on. I'd prove to the world I was important. My work took me about Wall Street and little by little I became interested in the market. Many people lost money - but some became very rich. Why not I? I studied economics and business as well as law. Potential alcoholic that I was, I nearly failed my law course. At one of the finals I was too drunk to think or write. Though my drinking was not yet continuous, it disturbed my wife. We had long talks when I would still her forebodings by telling her that men of genius conceived their best projects when drunk; that the most majestic constructions of philosophic thought were so derived. p. 2 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Student Of Life Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold. But just as material losses are not necessary to indicate alcoholism, material gains are not the true indications of sobriety. The real rewards aren't material in nature. I have friends now because I know how to be a friend and I know how to nurture and encourage valuable friendships. Instead of the prolonged one-night stands I used to call my boyfriends, there is a special man in my life I've been involved with for almost five years. And, most importantly, I know who I am. I know my goals, dreams, values, and boundaries, and I know how to protect, nurture, and validate them. Those are the true rewards of sobriety, and they're what I was looking for all along. I am so grateful that my Higher Power stepped in to show me the way to the truth. I pray every day that I never turn my back on it. I came to A.A. in order to stop drinking; what I received in return was my life. p. 327 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Two - "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." To clergymen, doctors, friends, and families, the alcoholic who means well and tries hard is a heartbreaking riddle. To most A.A.'s, he is not. There are too many of us who have been just like him, and have found the riddle's answer. This answer has to do with the quality of faith rather than its quantity. This has been our blind spot. We supposed we had humility when really we hadn't. We supposed we had been serious about religious practices when, upon honest appraisal, we found we had been only superficial. Or, going to the other extreme, we had wallowed in emotionalism and had mistaken it for true religious feeling. In both cases, we had been asking something for nothing. The fact was we really hadn't cleaned house so that the grace of God could enter us and expel the obsession. In no deep or meaningful sense had we ever taken stock of ourselves, made amends to those we had harmed, or freely given to any other human being without any demand for reward. We had not even prayed rightly. We had always said, "Grant me my wishes" instead of "Thy will be done." The love of God and man we understood not at all. Therefore we remained self-deceived, and so incapable of receiving enough grace to restore us to sanity. p. 32 ************************************************** ********* I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing. --Agatha Christie Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. --W.T. Purkiser The source of love is deep in us, and we can help others realize a lot of happiness. One word, one action, one thought can reduce another person's suffering and bring that person joy. --Thich Nhat Hanh Never let the word "impossible" stop you from pursuing what your heart and spirit urge you to do. Impossible things come true every day. --Robert K. Cooper Nothing is impossible to the willing heart. --Thomas Heywood H O P E = Happy Our Program Exists. *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation EXPERIENCE "Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him." -- Aldous Huxley Today I experience the joy of sobriety. Today I experience God in my world. Today I experience the peace and serenity that for years eluded me. Experience is the key. It locates all that is in my life. Experience allows me to appreciate what living is all about. Love is to be felt. Forgiveness is to be experienced. Humility is to be lived in action. Hope is to be recognized in the brightness of the eye. Life is to be experienced. That is spirituality. May the God that I experience be reflected in daily life. ************************************************** ********* "God will wipe away every tear from their eyes." Revelation 7:17 "I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry." Psalm 40:1 Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee: because he trusteth in Thee. Isaiah 26:3 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. James 3:17 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration You will not create a new life by simply forgetting the old one. Lord, help me create new values and new goals so that I will become a peaceful spirit which will bring newness and freshness to my life and allow me to greet the day with enthusiasm. Never underestimate the power of your presence nor your ability to comfort and encourage. Lord, thank You for my opportunities to do Your work. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Walking Through The Pain "We never have to use again, no matter how we feel. All feelings will eventually pass." Basic Text p. 79 It hurts like never before. You get out of bed after a sleepless night, talk to God, and still don't feel any better. "It will pass;" a little voice tells you. "When?" you wonder, as you pace and mutter and get on with your day. You sob in your car and turn the radio all the way up so you can't hear your own thoughts. But you go straight to work, and don't even think about using drugs. Your insides feel as though they've been torched. Just when the pain becomes unbearable, you go numb and silent. You go to a meeting and wish you were as happy as other members seem to be. But you don't relapse. You cry some more and call your sponsor. You drive to a friend's house and don't even notice the beautiful scenery because your inner landscape is so bleak. You may not feel any better after visiting your friend-but at least you didn't visit the connection instead. You listen to a Fifth Step. You share at a meeting. You look at the calendar and realize you've gotten through another day clean. Then one day you wake up, look outside, and realize it's a beautiful day. The sun is shining. The sky is blue. You take a deep breath, smile again, and know that it really does pass. Just for today: No matter how I feel today, I'll go on with my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Down in a green and shady bed A modest violet grew; Its stalk was bent, it hung its head, As if to hide from view. --Jane Taylor Shyness can be painful. Those of us who are shy do not choose to be this way. There are no quick and easy solutions to shyness, but it isn't the worst thing that could happen to us. And there are some things we can do about it. We can be willing to talk about it with someone we trust. We can exercise to build strength and self-confidence, and we can avoid dwelling on the problem. Most of all, we should not let shyness keep us from doing things. We may be a little uncomfortable, but that doesn't have to stop us from doing the task at hand to the best of our ability. We can be assured that the ability to succeed is within us, and keep in mind that, if we offer love to those around us, their answering love will help us overcome our shyness. What am I no longer too shy to try today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. You cannot devalue the body and value the soul - or value anything else. The isolation of the body sets it into direct conflict with everything else in creation. --Wendell Berry Our bodies are part of creation as much as trees, lakes, mountains, flowers, and animals. Part of our growth into full manhood is treating ourselves respectfully. It is a spiritual practice to be fully accepting, active, and alive physically. We can no longer be content to be only spectator sportsmen in front of the television set. We need to get our own muscles moving. What we take in as food expresses the level of respect we feel for ourselves. Our sexual expressions reflect the value we feel for our own bodies and our partners'. Our spiritual feelings become part of all the basic details of our lives. Today, I stand in God's creation as a physical body. My spiritual experience includes all the ways I care for and accept my body. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I think happiness is like the effect on an audience (when acting), if you think of it all the time you will not get it, you must get lost in the part, lost in your purposes and let the effect be the criterion of your success. --Joanna Field Happiness is a gift that accompanies every instance of our lives if we approach each situation with gratitude, knowing that what's offered to us is special to our particular needs. The experiences we meet day to day are honing our Spirit, tempering our hard edges. For these we should offer gratitude. Our well-being is the gift. Deciding what will make us happy, in fact, what we must have to be happy, prevents us from grasping the unexpected pleasure of the "chance" events of the moment. When we intently look for what we think we need, we may well be blind to more beneficial opportunities God has chosen for us. Our self-centeredness hinders every breath we take. It prejudices every encounter. It stifles our creative potential. And most of all, it blocks any chance for a spontaneous reaction to the moment. Spontaneity is the breeding ground for creative living. And happiness is the byproduct. Happiness is my decision, every moment. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Grief and Action Trust in God and do something. --Mary Lyon It's important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow. But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain. There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circumstance long enough. It becomes time to break out. It comes time to take action. We will know when it's time to break the routine of grieving. There will be signs within and around us. We will become tired of the heaviness. An idea will occur; an opportunity will present itself. We may think: No. Too much effort... Do it anyway. Try something. Reach out. Stretch. Do something unusual, something different, and something special. A new activity may help trigger the transformation process. Stay up two hours later than usual! Make an appointment to do something for yourself that is different from what you usually do. Visit someone you haven't seen in years. Do something to encourage and help the new energy coming your way. We may not feel like breaking out of grief. It may feel safer, easier, to remain in our cocoon. Begin pushing out anyway. Test the walls of your cocoon. Push. Push a little harder. It may be time to emerge. Today, I will trust God and the process, but I will also take action to help myself feel better. Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Discover the Power of Loving Yourself Sometimes it’s hard to trust life with all its sudden twists, turns, and storms. When something unexpected or painful happens, when we become blocked or frustrated, when life takes a different course than we hoped it would, it’s easy to stop trusting the flow of our lives. I didn’t ask for this. It’s not fair. I don’t want this, we think. This road isn’t leading anywhere, at least nowhere I want to go. Often, when we feel life has turned on us, we respond by turning on ourselves. But turning on ourselves doesn’t help. In fact, it can compound the situation. It can prevent us from hearing and acting on the very guidance that will lead us through, get us through, and take us to the next place. It can prevent us from hearing our heart. Keep loving yourself, and taking care of yourself, no matter what– through the storms,the twists, the turns, and the blocks. Take a moment, breathe deep, restore yourself to that sacred place of self-love and self-responsibility. Feel all your feelings. Then let them go. Love yourself until you can hear your heart and what it tells you to do. Love yourself until you find the courage to act on that guidance. Loving yourself is a powerful tool, a powerful force for change. It can reconnect you to creativity, to universal love, to the best possible flow of events within your life. It can and will reconnect you to life’s magic. There is a trustworthy road through whatever life brings. Loving yourself will help you find it. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Undo your mistakes “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” This is the Tenth Step of the Alcoholics Anonymous Twelve Step program. It’s also a step that many wise people not working a program practice,too. Sometimes the mistakes we make are teeny, tiny ones. We say something that hurts another person. Or we behave in a way we know is inappropriate, and we feel badly about it. Sometimes the mistakes are bigger. We may have taken a job or gotten ourselves into a relationship thinking it was a good idea only to discover later that it wasn’t. For whatever the reasons motivating us at the time, we made a mistake. We took a wrong turn on the path, and the direction we’re going isn’t where we meant to go and isn’t where we want to be. Or we’ve arrived at a dead end. Step Ten is part of the program, one-twelfth of the program, because someone knew we were going to need it, maybe one-twelfth of the time. The words I’m sorry are in our language because we’ve developed a need for that phrase,too. Not making amends can damage our relationships. When pride or shame prevent us from making amends, we close our hearts to God, ourselves, and the people we love. Admit your mistake. Take any actions necessary to correct the situation for yourself and the people involved. Just open your heart and say these five words: I’m sorry. I was wrong. Then let it go and get one with your life. Have the courage to do what you need to do to get on track with your life. God, help me admit to myself, you, and others when I’m wrong and have made a mistake– whether it’s a small one or a major wrong turn in my life. Then, help me to undo my actions and get back on track again. ***** Decorating Life The World as Home There are few things more thrilling than having a new house or an empty room to decorate. Our imaginations soar as we consider the many possibilities. In the same way, our lives offer us the opportunity to express ourselves within various contexts, to ask ourselves questions about what we want to see as we move through our days and how we want things to flow. Some people do this instinctively, moving through the various environments they inhabit and shifting the energy with their presence. These people have a knack for decorating life. This can be as simple as the way they dress, the way they speak, or the fact that they always bring a bouquet of wildflowers when they come for a visit. As we move through the world, we make a statement, whether we intend to or not. We shift the energy one way when we enter a room dressed elegantly and simply, and another when we show up in bright, cheerful colors and a floppy hat. One is not better than the other. It is simply a question of the mood we wish to create. What we wear is just one choice we can focus on. The way we speak to people, or touch them, shifts the energy more profoundly than almost anything else. The words we speak and the tone in which we say them are the music we choose to play in the world that is our home. Some of us fill the space with passionate arias, others with healing hymns. Again, one is not better than the other. We are all called to contribute. Just as we consciously create an environment within our homes, we can consciously choose to decorate life itself with our particular energy. Ideally, in doing so, we express our deeper selves, so that the adornments we add to the world make it more meaningful, more beautiful, and as welcoming as a beloved home. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Many of us in The Program stubbornly cling to false ideas and positions simply because we fear we’d be left defenseless if we admitted having been wrong. The thought of “backing down” still seems distasteful to some of us. But we come to learn that our self-esteem soars when we’re able to push pride into the background and truly face the facts. Chances are that people with true humility have more genuine self-esteem than those of us who are repeatedly victimized by pride. Does pride deviously keep me from thorough and continuing attention to the Tenth Step? Today I Pray May pride stay out of my way, now that I’ve found a road to follow. May I avoid that familiar, destructive cycle of pride — the ego that balloons up out of all proportion and then deflates with a fizzle. May I learn the value of “backing down.” Today I Will Remember Pride is the arch-enemy of self-esteem. ************************************* One More Day The People plan and God laughs. –Yiddish Proverb Through the ages our ancestors have recognized that sometimes what happens is due to a purely random selection. Natural disasters occur, accidents happen, and people are in the wrong places at the wrong times. But what about being in the right place at the right time? It’s not very often that we hear those stories. We hear about trade dies and real triumphs. What we don’t hear are stories about people like us, who struggle along, doing the best they can, hoping for a break. We have learned there are times to let go of unrealistic plans and to let our Higher Power have a hand in our lives. By letting go we create our own well-being. I make my plans and hope for success, knowing there is a Power greater than me who has the final word. ************************************ Food For Thought Escape into Sleep After we stop eating compulsively, we may be tempted to use sleep as a form of escape. Though not as detrimental as excess food, too much sleep can also make us lethargic and dull. The danger lies in allowing ourselves to escape the realities of living, rather than coping with them. We all need adequate rest in order to feel good and function efficiently. Sleep becomes an escape, however, if we take long daytime naps instead of finding worthwhile and enjoyable activities. Just as we may have overeaten because of boredom, we may oversleep because we have nothing better to do. Our Higher Power has a plan for the time and talents He gives us. It is our job to discover how and where we can best serve God and each other. With the new life we are given in OA goes the responsibility to use it productively. Since this is the only life we have, we do not choose to sleep it away. By facing our problems with the help of this program, we learn how to deal with them. Deliver me from indolence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Aging ~ Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young. Benjamin Franklin I used to be afraid of getting older. I was also afraid to become friends with older people, because I would come to love them and then they would die. I could not handle unpleasant feelings (other than if I overate to stop feeling them) because the feeling of unpleasantness would totally devastate me. In working the Twelve Step program, my Higher Power has brought me great recovery in this area ... I am now able to handle the grief and sorrow that come up when I allow myself to get to know and love older people and then they die. I am now free in this area! I get to enjoy the wisdom and beauty that they have to share, from all their life experiences, and from the beautiful people they are! Another beautiful gift from my Higher Power came when I started relating to older people again. When the first one died, it really threw me, and I was very sad. But I got up the next day and had a great spiritual awakening: this person was missing and that was sad, but I looked around and saw all the other wonderful people still there in my life, with whom I got to share another day! Life suddenly became much more precious to me ... to have one more day to be with and share with someone who touches my soul! One Day at a Time . . . I enjoy myself as I become older. I allow myself to enjoy friendships with those who are older than me. I thank my Higher Power for every day and every moment of precious life! ~ Lynne ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun! Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to. A Return to Living Today, I keep my house clean and let go of the rest - some of the ways that I wish to live as a recovered person will not be readily understood by others. I will keep my own scorecard clean and not worry about the results. I will act in a way that makes it easier for me to live with myself - that keeps my own conscience clear. Other people's negative projections of me no longer run me. I am the one who makes the decisions about who I want to be. I need not defend and explain myself again and again. I need not ask permission to be who I am. I allow myself to be happy in my own skin today. I think well of myself, no matter what others think of me. I create my own self. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The people you most need to give love to will seem like the ones who deserve it the least. It begins with me. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Going to any lengths are our strengths. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote It's not just the 'yets' I worry about if I pick up a drink - it's also the 'agains'. - Anon.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
11-10-2024, 05:42 AM | #18 |
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November 18
Daily Reflections A SAFETY NET Occasionally. . . We are seized with a rebellion so sickening that we simply won't pray. When these things happen we should not think too ill of ourselves. We should simply resume prayer as soon as we can, doing what we know to be good for us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105 Sometimes I scream, stomp my feet, and turn my back on my Higher Power. Then my disease tells me that I am a failure, and that if I stay angry I'll surely get drunk. In those moments of self-will it's as if I've slipped over a cliff and am hanging by one hand. The above passage is my safety net, in that it urges me to try some new behavior, such as being kind and patient with myself. It assures me that my Higher Power will wait until I am willing once again to risk letting go, to land in the net, and to pray. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have got over my procrastination. I was always putting things off till tomorrow and as a result that never got done. "There is always another day" was my motto instead of "Do it now." Under the influence of alcohol, I had grandiose plans. When I was sober I was too busy getting over my drunk to start anything. "Some day I'll do that" -- but I never did it. In A.A. I have learned it's better to make a mistake once in a while than to never do anything at all. We learn by trial and error. But we must act now and not put it off until tomorrow. Have I learned to do it now? Meditation For The Day "Do not hide your light under a bushel. Arise and shine, for the light has come and the glory of the Lord has risen in thee." The glory of the Lord shines in the beauty of a man's character. It is risen in you, even though you can realize it only in part. "Now you see as in a glass darkly, but later you will see face to face." The glory of the Lord is too dazzling for mortals to see fully on earth. But some of this glory is risen in you when you try to reflect that light in your life. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may try to be a reflection of the Divine Light. I pray that some of its rays may shine in my life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Running The Whole Show, p. 320 Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show and is forever trying to arrange the lights, the scenery, and the rest of the players in his own way. If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. What usually happens? The show doesn't come off very well. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be useful? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well? Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 60-61 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The old friends who dropped us. Personal relations. As our drinking progressed, most of us lost old friends. Sometimes it was our behavior that drove them away; at other times, it was because they didn't want to associate with "losers." In sobriety, some of our old friendships have been restored. These are real friendships based on trust and true affection. But sobriety can also give us a deeper and finer understanding of friendships. We may acquire a new set of values on this subject. We may find that some of those whom we considered friends were only fair-weather drinking acquaintances. Drinking acquaintances will probably ease away from us if we really means business in staying sober. This need not bother us if we're thinking rightly. The great news in all of this is that in the fellowship, we'll be making some of the best friends we can ever have. We'll also learn how to be great friends with ourselves. In my thinking about friendship today, I'll seek people I trust and like, not people I can use. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Life is short: live it up. Nikita We won't stay sober long unless it's more fun than using chemicals. The truth is, using chemicals wasn't fun anymore. It was work. We just told ourselves it was still fun. So live it up! Try new things. Meet new friends. Try new foods. Taking risks and having adventures are a basic human need. So go for it. Sobriety is fun. Living a spiritual life is fun. Get out there and live! Prayer for the day: Higher Power ,teach me to play. Teach me to have fun. Teach me to live! Action for the day: Today is for fun. I'll try something new. I'll see how many people I can get to smile. And I'll celebrate the fact that I'm sober. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself. Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities. Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone. Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours. I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY By the time I had completed the course, I knew the law was not for me. The inviting maelstrom of Wall Street had me in its grip. Business and financial leaders were my heroes. Out of this alloy of drink and speculation, I commenced to forge the weapon that one day would turn in its flight like a boomerang and all but cut me to ribbons. Living modestly, my wife and I saved $1,000. It went into certain securities, then cheap and rather unpopular. I rightly imagined that they would some day have a great rise. I failed to persuade my broker friends to send me out looking over factories and managements, but my wife and I decided to go anyway. I had developed a theory that most people lost money in stocks through ignorance of markets. I discovered many more reasons later on. p. 2 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. Denial is the most cunning, baffling, and powerful part of my disease of alcoholism. When I look back now, it's hard to imagine I didn't see a problem with my drinking. But instead of seeing the truth when all the "yets" (as in, that hasn't happened to me--yet) started happening, I just kept lowering my standards. p. 328 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Two - "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Few indeed are the practicing alcoholics who have any idea how irrational they are, or seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it. Some will be willing to term themselves "problem drinkers," but cannot endure the suggestion that they are in fact mentally ill. They are abetted in this blindness by a world which does not understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism. "Sanity" is defined as "soundness of mind." Yet no alcoholic, soberly analyzing his destructive behavior, whether the destruction fell on the dining-room furniture or his own moral fiber, can claim "soundness of mind" for himself. pp. 32-33 ************************************************** ********* "What makes humility so desirable is the marvelous thing it does to us; it creates in us a capacity for the closest possible intimacy with God." --Monica Baldwin What you are is God's gift to you, What you do with yourself is your gift to God. --White Buffalo Calf Woman Remember that your children are not your own, but are lent to you by the Creator. --Native American Proverb A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. --Carl Sandburg Honesty is the best way to gain the trust of others. By being honest, feelings may or may not be hurt. Whichever the case you will end up respecting yourself more for it. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation STRENGTH "All cruelty springs from weakness." -- Seneca My spiritual recovery means that I confront my disease and remember sick attitudes and behavior patterns. I would rather not talk about my disease because it is embarrassing and shameful particularly my cruelty to people and animals. My alcoholism made me lash out at the weak; yes, my weakness inflicted pain and cruelty on others. I remember this only to rejoice in today's strength that allows vulnerability. My past weaknesses made me act strong. Today my strength allows me to be weak. God, the recognition of my past cruelties enables me to forgive and understand others. ************************************************** ********* Set a guard over my mouth ,O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3 "You heavens above, rain down righteousness; let the clouds shower it down. Let the earth open wide, let salvation spring up, let righteousness grow with it; I, the LORD, have created it. Isaiah 45:8 No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, that you may be able to endure it. 1 Corinthians 10:13 Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death. Proverbs 19:18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Your life is yours to live as you choose with the results that you want. Lord, help me to be full of life, full of energy and greet my opportunities with a peaceful smile and a gentle gratitude. Faith grows by speaking daily with God. Lord, You teach me Your promises when times are good so that I will be able to trust in You when times are hard. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Self-discovery "The Tenth Step can help us correct our living problems and prevent their recurrence." Basic Text p. 41 Our identities, how we think and feel, have been shaped by our experiences. Some of our experiences have made us better people; others have caused us shame or embarrassment; all of them have influenced who we are today. We can take advantage of the knowledge gained in examining our mistakes, using this wisdom to guide the decisions we'll make today. Acceptance of ourselves means accepting all aspects of ourselves - our assets, our defects, our successes, and our failures. Shame and guilt left unaddressed can paralyze us, preventing us from moving forward in our lives. Some of the most meaningful amends we can make for the mistakes of our past are made simply by acting differently today. We strive for improvement and measure our success by comparing who we used to be with who we are now. Being human, we will continue making mistakes; however, we need not make the same ones over and over again. By looking over our past and realizing that we have changed and grown, we'll find hope for the future. The best is yet to come. Just for today: I will do the best I can with what I have today. Each day I'll learn something new that will help me tomorrow. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. One comes in the end to realize that there is no permanent pure relationship and there should not be. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Whether we are teenagers in love for the first time, or parents who have been married for twenty years, relationships can turn into obsessions if we're not careful. We can lose our sense of self and only feel complete when we're with the other person. We can become totally attached and dependent on the primary person in our lives for all our needs. We need to remember that we can be a good partner in a relationship only if we feel complete within ourselves. Keeping ourselves open to change in our surroundings, our loved ones, and especially ourselves helps us stay whole. We learn, first, to be ourselves, to make independent choices. We dare to do things on our own. Things as simple as going for a walk by ourselves and smelling the scents of nature. Being ourselves means bringing our own world to meet the world of our loved ones, rather than depending on them to make our world. Am I making my own happiness so I may share it with others? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I always entertain great hopes. --Robert Frost In our honest journey, we must admit life is often difficult and painful. But these facts do not describe all of life, and they do not determine how we respond. The sun rises warm and bright after a cold and dark night. The open, generous smile of a small child reaches into the soft part of us all. To be strong and hardy men on this spiritual path, we must be truthful about the pain and unfairness in life while holding firmly to a belief in all the generous possibilities. Surrendering to despair, we trade the uncertainty of options for the certainty of gloom. Then we might say, "At least I'm never disappointed this way." Life isn't filled only with difficulty and pain. It is also filled with people whose dignity and spirit rise above their circumstances. There are situations when great sacrifice or love and wisdom turn a problem into an opportunity and strength. If we look at what has happened in our own lives and in those of others, we have ample reason to hope. My own experience in recovery gives me great hope in what can be. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself. Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities. Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone. Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours. I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Allowing Ourselves to be Nurtured Let yourself be nurtured and loved. Let people be there for you. Allow yourself to be held when it would feel good. Let someone listen to you, support and encourage you when you need that. Receive comfort from someone's physical presence when you need that. Allow yourself to be supported emotionally and cared about. For too long, we've stood in the background, attending to the needs of others and claiming we have no needs of our own. We've shut off, for to long, the part of us that longs to be nurtured. It is time, now, to claim those needs, to identify them, and to understand that we deserve to have them met. What are our needs? What would feel good? What kinds of ways would we like others to nurture and support us? The clearer we can be about our needs, the greater the possibility they will be met. Hugs. A listening ear. Support. Encouragement. The physical and emotional presence of people who care about us. Doesn't that sound good? Tempting? Someone once said to me, "The eighties have been a 'me' decade. Now, maybe the nineties can be a 'you' decade." My reply was immediate. "Let's make the nineties a 'me' and 'you' decade." No matter how long we've been recovering, we never outgrow our need for nurturing and love. Today, I will open to recognizing my needs for nurturing. I will be open to the needs of those around me too. I can begin taking a nurturing, loving attitude toward myself and by taking responsibility for my needs in relationships. Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Live with Unsolved Problems Sometimes we need to live for a while with a particular behavior, problem, or situation before we’re ready to change it. Sometimes we have to live with it so long– conscious that it’s a problem but unable yet to solve or change it– that we can hardly bear it. We’re fully aware that we want and need something different, but the situation still hasn’t changed. The answer has not yet arrived. We worry that the situation will continue eternally and the problem will never be solved. During those times of living with a problem and the desire to solve it, we may long for the old days, those days when our denial system was intact and we didn’t know what we were doing. If you can’t solve it yet, if you can’t change it yet, it’s okay to live with it, just as it is. Something is happening. The situation is changing. You’re on your way to change. Trust that the waiting part of change is necessary. Trust that your desire for change is the beginning of change. Trust that each moment you are moving closer to the change you desire. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Improvise Do not fear mistakes; there are none. –Miles Davis Life is a jazz tune. Sometimes it’s raucous, sometimes blue, but always full of unexpected twists and turns, and here and there a delightful new sound emerges. Viewed from a staunch classical viewpoint we might be tempted to call the new note or harmonization a mistake, but in the free flowing world of jazz, it becomes just another piece of the melodic whole. So we took the wrong job, chose a career based on what others expected of you rather that what you expected of yourself. Was it a mistake? Only if you spent all your time there dwelling on the fact that you would rather be someplace else and missed the chance to learn something about yourself. Admit your mistakes. Say sorry when you’re wrong. But don’t feel trapped by the mistakes of your past and don’t trap yourself now by the possibility of future mistakes. Sure, we’ll continue to screw up. But, we just might invent a new note or two along the way. ***** Staying Afloat Amidst the Spin Taking Things Personally Every time you interact with others, you have the choice to listen to, acknowledge, and let go of their words, or you can take what they are saying personally. Taking things personally is often the result of perceiving a person’s actions or words as an affront or slight. In order to take something personally, you must read negative intent in an individual’s words or actions. But what people do and say has no bearing upon you and is usually based on their own experiences, emotions, and perceptions. If you attempt to take what they do or say personally, you may end up feeling hurt without reason. If you are tempted to take a comment or action personally, creating some distance between yourself and the other person can help you. Try to determine what is at the root of your feelings. Ask yourself if the other person’s words or actions are just reinforcing some insecurity within you or if you can really be sure that an offense was intended. You may even want to ask them what they meant. Finally, put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Instead of taking their words as the truth, or as a personal affront, remember that whatever was said or done is based on their opinion and is more reflective of what is going on inside of them, rather than having anything to do with you. You may have been an easy target for someone having a bad day, and their comments may have been offered with no ill intentions. When you recognize that what anyone says or does doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you, you will no longer feel hurt or attacked. While it’s easy to take things personally, you should never let anyone’s perceptions or actions affect how you see yourself or your worth. Your life is personal to you, and it is up to you to influence your own value and sense of well-being. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “Nothing is enough to the man for whom enough is too little,” wrote the Greek philosopher Epicurus. Now that we’re free from addiction, rebuilding our self-respect and winning back the esteem of family and friends, we have to avoid becoming smug about our new-found success. For most of us, success has always been a heady brew; even in our new life, it’s still possible to fall into the dangerous trap of “big-shot-itis.” As insurance, we ought to remember that we’re free today only by the grace of God. Will I remember that any success i may be having is far more His success than mine? Today I Pray May I keep constant string-on-the-finger reminder that I have found freedom through the grace of God — just so I don’t let my pride try to convince me I did it all myself. May I learn to cope with success by ascribing it to a Higher Power, not to my own questionable superiority. Today I Will Remember Learn to deal with success. ************************************* One More Day Life is not a static thing. – Everet M. Dirkson Sometimes change occurs so slowly within us that we don’t notice it. We accept it and may even welcome it when it happens gradually, but we’re less likely to accept those changes that arrive suddenly. Abrupt change doesn’t fit what we expect and can cause chaos in our lives. When we finally realize we can’t prevent changes from happening, but can only alter our reactions to these changes, they become easier to accept. We can’t stop our declining health either, but we can certainly understand the influence a positive attitude can have on our lives. I will accept the things I cannot change. ************************************ Food For Thought No Exit We have tried many ways of avoiding problems and pain. In addition to food, we may have used alcohol, drugs, sleep, sex, compulsive activity, or excessive daydreaming to try to escape whatever it was that we did not want to encounter. Undoubtedly, we found that nothing worked permanently; the problem or pain remained. It is the attempt to avoid discomfort that turned fear into panic. Whatever troubles or threatens us becomes more unmanageable when we pretend that it does not exist. Now that we have the OA program and contact with a Power greater than ourselves, we can confront our problems without searching frantically for an exit from reality. Our pain is what teaches us the things we need to know. By being willing to be broken, we are able to become whole. Through our distress, we are watched over by the One who heals us. We need no exit. Thank You for the faith that overcomes panic. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ HONESTY ~ You never find yourself until you face the truth. Pearl Bailey I was brought up to be scrupulously honest, or so I thought. I still remember how my father would go back into a shop if he'd been given too much change, a practice that I adopted too. I found it hard to tell a lie, even a white lie, and I would never contemplate cheating on a test. But when it came to food, I only realized later, I was totally dishonest. I was even dishonest when it came to telling people how I felt, or for that matter who I really was. The person who did these things was a totally different person to the upright person I liked people to see. I know now that all the things I'd hidden around food were obviously what I felt ashamed about. I wanted people to see only the "good" side of me and not the person who did all these devious things in secret. I kept thinking that I was a bad person and the shame stopped me from being totally honest about what I had been doing. It has taken time, and the love and acceptance I have found in the fellowship, to be able to get totally honest with myself. It has taken time to look at all the things about me that I felt ashamed of. In the housecleaning necessary in the Steps, I have been able to face my shame. I learned that I am human, and that I have a disease. Some of the soul searching has been very painful, but at the same time it has been totally enlightening. I am amazed how I am beginning to know a new me, with faults and all, but a loveable me nevertheless. As I peel off more layers of the onion that represents the sum total of what makes me unique and truly one of God's creatures, I am actually beginning to like the new me. I know now that I am not a bad person trying to get good, merely a sick person trying to get well. One Day at a Time . . . I will keep being honest about who I am, what I eat and how I am behaving in my relationships, so I can learn more about me. Even when I don't like what I see, I know I am still a lovable person and a child of God, created in His image. ~ Sharon S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote As we discovered the principles by which the individual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve principles by which A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole could survive and function effectively. It was thought that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded from our Society; that our leaders might serve but never govern; that each group was to be autonomous and there was to be no professional class of therapy. - Pg. xix - 4th Edition - Forward To The Second Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Addiction is the great solvent that equalizes all people. We are equal in our addiction and equal in our program of recovery. Although with each passing day of sobriety we get clearer, we are only one fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort away from a binge--at 18 days or 18 years! May I realize I am no better or worse than another, or them from me. We are equal in our recovery. Letting Go Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order; it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb myself, I have missed the point of this process. On the other had, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have worked through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be fully healthy and return to life. The part of my healing that is a flowing through the stored pain from the past is a decisive, forward-moving action. I understand that, as part of my process of healing, my responsibility to let go and move on. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is co-dependence. If I can't say it kindly, I needn't say it at all. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It came to pass; it didn't come to stay. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote People think that they're going to get sober by osmosis and going to 90 meetings in 90 days. But there's only one way to obtain and maintain sobriety and that's through the program folded within these 164 pages. - Ted H.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
11-10-2024, 05:43 AM | #19 |
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November 19
Daily Reflections "I WAS SLIPPING FAST" We A.A.'s are active folk, enjoying the satisfactions of dealing with the realities of life, . . . . So it isn't surprising that we often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something not really necessary. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96 I had been slipping away from the program for some time, but it took a death threat from a terminal disease to bring me back, and particularly to the practice of the Eleventh Step of our blessed Fellowship. Although I had fifteen years of sobriety and was still very active in the program, I knew that the quality of my sobriety had slipped badly. Eighteen months later, a checkup revealed a malignant tumor and a prognosis of certain death within six months. Despair settled in when I enrolled in a rehab program, after which I suffered two small strokes which revealed two large brain tumors. As I kept hitting new bottoms I had to ask myself why this was happening to me. God allowed me to recognize my dishonesty and to become teachable again. Miracles began to happen. But primarily I relearned the whole meaning of the Eleventh Step. My physical condition has improved dramatically, but my illness is minor compared to what I almost lost completely. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. we do not speak much of sex. And yet putting sex in its proper place in our lives is one of the rewards that has come to us as a result of our new way of living. The big book says that many of us needed an overhauling there. It also says that we subjected each sex relation to this test -- was it selfish or not? "We remembered always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly, nor to be despised or loathed." We can ask God to mold our ideals and to help us to live up to them. We can act accordingly. Have I got my sex life under proper control? Meditation For The Day "I will lift up my eyes unto the heights whence cometh my help." Try to raise your thoughts from the depths of the sordid and mean and impure things of the earth to the heights of goodness and decency and beauty. Train your insight by trying to take the higher view. Train it more and more until distant heights become more familiar. The heights of the Lord, whence cometh your help, will become nearer and dearer and the false values of the earth will seem farther away. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not keep my eyes forever downcast. I pray that I may set my sights on higher things. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Results of Prayer, p. 321 As the doubter tries the process of prayer, he should begin to add up the results. If he persists, he will most surely find more serenity, more tolerance, less fear, and less anger. He will acquire a quiet courage, the kind that isn't tension-ridden. He can look at "failure" and "success" for what these really are. Problems and calamity will begin to mean his instruction, instead of his destruction. He will feel freer and saner. The idea that he may have been hypnotizing himself by autosuggestion will become laughable. His sense of purpose and of direction will increase. His anxieties will commence to fade. His physical health will be likely to improve. Wonderful and unaccountable things will start to happen. Twisted relations in his family and on the outside will improve surprisingly. Grapevine, June 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Is there bondage in attending meetings? Sharing A few critics have noted scornfully that AA members can be as enslaved by the need for meetings as we were by the bottle. are we compulsively addicted to meetings. When we hear such remarks, we must remember that our survival insobriety is always the main issue. We might be going to more meetings that seems necessary , but we are the judges of our own needs. In addition, meeting attendance is a constructive activity, while drinking was destructive... at least for us. If we're gong to overdo something, at least it's an activity that helps us. We should never consider meeting attendance a form of bondage. There are many activities in life that are required for our peace and freedom. Meeting attendance is one of these things. We can be grateful for the opportunities meetings provide for sharing our personal experiences. No criticism should be allowed to intrude on this. I'll not let outside criticism interfere with any AA activity that is benefiting me and maintaining my sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple What we don't live, we cannot teach others.---Day By Day Remember - we don't carry the message to others until we get to Step Twelve. We must first learn to live in a sober way. Sobriety takes time. We have to stop using alcohol and other drugs, but this is only the start. Just as it takes time to build a home, it takes time to build a new way of life. We talk with friends and sponsors about the Steps. We try using them in out lives. Then we talk about how the Steps work for us. We talk about where we get stuck with the Steps. All this takes time. We aren't in a hurry. We have a lifetime ahead of us. Remember-the better we live our program, the better we help others. Prayer for the day: Higher Power, You'll let me know when I'm to carry the message. Until then, be with me as I build a new way of life, a spiritual way of life. Action for the day: I'll take time to think over where I'm with my program. I'll talk about it with a friend. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself. Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities. Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone. Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours. I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY We gave up our positions and off we roared on a motorcycle, the sidecar stuffed with tent, blankets, a change of clothes, and three huge volumes of a financial reference service. Our friends thought a lunacy commission should be appointed. Perhaps they were right. I had had some success at speculation, so we had little money, but we once worked on a farm for a month to avoid drawing on our small capital. That was the last honest manual labor on my part for many a day. We covered the whole eastern United States in a year. At the end of it, my reports to Wall Street procured me a position there and the use of a large expense account. The exercise of an option brought in more money, leaving us with a profit of several thousand dollars for that year. pp. 2-3 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. Dad was an alcoholic, and my mother drank throughout her pregnancy, but I don't blame my parents for my alcoholism. Kids with a lot worse upbringings than mine did not turn out alcoholic, while some that had it alot better did. In fact, I stopped wondering, "Why me?" a long time ago. It's like a man standing on a bridge in the middle of a river with his pants on fire wondering why his pants are on fire. It doesn't matter. Just jump in! And that is exactly what I did with A.A. once I finally crossed the river of denial! p. 328 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Two - "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Therefore, Step Two is the rallying point for all of us. Whether agnostic, atheist, or former believer, we can stand together on this Step. True humility and an open mind can lead us to faith, and every A.A. meeting is an assurance that God will restore us to sanity if we rightly relate ourselves to Him. p. 33 ************************************************** ********* Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. --Helen Keller I believe in God -- this is a fine, praiseworthy thing to say, but to acknowledge God wherever and however he manifest Himself, that in truth is heavenly bliss on earth. --Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Maximize your productive time by focusing on positive outcomes. --unknown Perseverance can tip the scales from failure to success. --unknown If you always do what you've always done, you will always be where you've always been. --unknown H O W = Honest, Open, Willing *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation FORGIVING "He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself. For every man has need to be forgiven." -- Thomas Fuller My failings as an alcoholic help me to live with others today. The fact that I made and make mistakes helps me to have creative relationships today. Because I know what it is to fail, I can understand the failings of others. My weaknesses are a bridge to understanding my fellow man. By contrast when I was drinking, I thought I was perfect, always right and this led to judgments, arguments and a self-imposed alienation. Alcohol fed my arrogance and pride; sobriety helps develop humility and understanding. God, I understand that even my failings can be made to work for me in sobriety. ************************************************** ********* "The measure you give will be the measure you get back." Luke 6:38 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Matthew 7:1-2 In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. Psalm 118:5 Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart." Galatians 6:9 "But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not grow faint." Isaiah 40:31 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Listen to hear and learn. Lord, help me to practice listening without judgment and interruption so that I fully benefit and truly comprehend the nature of what is being shared with me. Learn to be peaceful in all situations and trust that through all stages of our lives, God has a plan. Lord, may I have the wisdom to be able to turn my stumbling blocks into building blocks. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Language Of Empathy "... the addict would find from the start as much identification as each needed to convince himself that he could stay clean, by the example of others who had recovered for many years." Basic Text p. 85 Many of us attended our first meeting and, not being entirely sure that NA was for us, found much to criticize. Either we felt as though no one had suffered like we had or that we hadn't suffered enough. But as we listened we started to hear something new, a wordless language with its roots in recognition, belief, and faith: the language of empathy. Desiring to belong, we kept listening. We find all the identification we need as we learn to understand and speak the language of empathy. To understand this special language, we listen with our hearts. The language of empathy uses few words; it feels more than it speaks. It doesn't preach or lecture - it listens. It can reach out and touch the spirit of another addict without a single spoken word. Fluency in the language of empathy comes to us through practice. The more we use it with other addicts and our Higher Power, the more we understand this language. It keeps us coming back. Just for today: I will listen with my heart. With each passing day, I will become more fluent in the language of empathy. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We all fear what we don't know--it's natural. --Leo Buscaglia If we put a blindfold over our eyes and begin to walk around an open field, we would feel unsure with each step. We might be afraid of falling, afraid of walking over some unseen edge and hurting ourselves. When any of us face something and we don't know what the outcome will be, we often feel blindfolded. We fear we may get hurt. We fear we can't do it. We have a hard time trusting ourselves. A blind person often finds help or guidance from others, or will gain confidence by walking on--slowly at first, finding trust and sureness with each step. These same things help us when we are afraid. It is also helpful to remember there is no right or wrong way to explore what faces us--only our own way. What new trust can I place in myself today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Archie Bunker: What's wrong with revenge? That's a perfect way to get even. --Norman Lear When we are locked within negative, hostile thinking patterns, we go around in mental circles. What seems perfectly rational to us at the time looks misguided and blind when we look back. Carrying a grudge or a desire to get even with someone is a cancer inside us. It belittles us and holds back our spirit. We break through our mental circles by revealing our anger to others. We talk with other recovering men and let them know the details of our resentments. We listen to their experiences and apply them in our program. As long as we keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves, we only recycle the same thinking system. When we take the risk and talk to friends, we build bridges that bring in new ideas. I will not harbor my resentments within myself. I will talk with a trusted friend so I can learn to let them go. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills. --Minna Antrim It is not by chance but by design that the sorrows we experience throughout our lives are countered by equal servings of joy. One offsets the other. And we are strengthened by their combination. Our longing for only life's joys is human--also folly. Joy would become insipid if it were our steady diet. Joyful times serve us well as respites from the trying situations that push our growth and development as women. Laughter softens the cutting edges of the lessons we seek or are cornered by. It offers perspective when the outlook is bleak. And for those of us who are recovering, wallowing in the bleaker times used to be acceptable behavior. But no more. The reality is that each day will present both occasions for anguish and ones inviting easy laughter. Both are valuable. Neither should dominate. Joy and sorrow are analogous to the ebb and flow of the ocean tide. They are natural rhythms. And we are mellowed by their presence when we accept them as necessary to our very existence. Any pain today guarantees an equal amount of pleasure, if I willingly accept them both. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Accepting Our Feelings Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions, especially concerning other people? They are only feelings! In the course of a day, we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to someone who is selling us a service. We may deny that we feel frustrated, angry, or hurt in reaction to a friend. We may deny feelings of fear, or anger, toward our children. We may deny a whole range of feelings toward our spouse or the person with whom we're in a love relationship. We may deny feelings provoked by people we work for, or by people who work for us. Sometimes the feelings are a direct reaction to others. Sometimes people trigger something deeper - an old sadness or frustration. Regardless of the source of our feelings, they are still our feelings. We own them. And acceptance is often all that is necessary to make them go away. We don't have to let our feelings control our behavior. We don't have to act on each feeling that passes through us. We do not need to indulge in inappropriate behavior. It does help to talk about our feelings with someone we trust. Sometimes we need to bring our feelings to the person who is triggering them. That can breed intimacy and closeness. But the most important person we need to tell is ourselves. If we allow our feelings to pass through us, accept them, and release them, we shall know what to do next. Today, I will remember that feelings are an important part of my life. I will be open to my feelings in family life, in friendships, in love, and at work. I will feel my feelings without judging myself. I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Awaken to the Storyteller Within Each of us has a story to tell, a story to share with the world. Artists and writers are in the storytelling business. Others have different ways of telling and sharing their stories. The tackle shop owner sells bait, hooks, and sinkers and tells people where to fish and about the big one that got away. The master carpenter tells his story by carving and hanging a wooden door so well crafted that it swings shut gently on its own. The quilter tells her story by commemorating important moments from her life in quilts that are colorful works of art. Each of us has a story to tell and our own way of sharing it with the world. It comes out through our words, through our work, and through the simple actions of our daily life. Listen to the stories of the people around you. Listen to your soul. Learn to value without judging and listen with an open heart to the beauty of each story and the importance of the storyteller. Learn to value and appreciate the story you are living now. Awaken to the storyteller within and share your story with the world. Tell it with joy and flair. Commit to telling it with love and passion. Tell it through living your life fully, doing your work well, and creating the best life you can. Be who you are and love being that. Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people’s souls. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Respect the powers that be I watched the man out the window as he dragged his kayak out to sea. Just as he’d get ready to launch, a huge frothy wave would come barreling over the top of him. The kayak would fly off in one direction. Then I’d see a paddle emerge form the sea. He’d walk back to his boat, try again, only to have himself and the boat tossed around by the wave. Finally, the last wave took the boat and threw it all the way to shore. When the man, in his thirties, stood up, he looked up at the heavens and stretched out his arms. It was the surrender position, that what can I do but resign myself to the powers that be stance that some of us know so well. Yes, we’re learning to believe in ourselves. We’re learning to say I can. But an important part of self-confidence and self-esteem is learning humilty and respect for the powers that be. Set your goals. Pursue your dreams. Say what you want and learn to say when. Hold your head up high, but learn to sublimate yourself,too. Sometimes you’ve just got to throw your hands up in the air and surrender to the powers that be. God, help me let go of arrogance and receive the blessings that humility brings. ***** The Dance of Intimacy Coming Back to Center in a Relationship by Madisyn Taylor In a long-term relationship it is often necessary to get back to basics and come back to center with each other. Anyone in a long-term relationship knows that the dance of intimacy involves coming together and moving apart. Early in a relationship, intense periods of closeness are important in order to establish the ground of a new union. Just as a sapling needs a lot more attention than a full-grown tree, budding relationships demand time and attention if they are to fully take root. Once they become more established, the individuals in the union begin to turn their attention outward again, to the other parts of their lives that matter, such as work, family, and friendships. This is natural and healthy. Yet, if a long-term relationship is to last, turning towards one another recurrently, with the same curiosity, attention, and nurturance of earlier times, is essential. In a busy and demanding world full of obligations and opportunities, we sometimes lose track of our primary relationships, thinking they will tend to themselves. We may have the best intentions when we think about how nice it would be to surprise our partner with a gift or establish a weekly date night. Yet somehow, life gets in the way. We may think that our love is strong enough to survive without attention. Yet even mature trees need water and care if they are to thrive. One of the best ways to nourish a relationship is through communication. If you feel that a distance has grown between you and your partner, you may be able to bridge the gap by sharing how you feel. Do your best to avoid blame and regret. Focus instead on the positive, which is the fact that you want to grow closer together. Sometimes, just acknowledging that there is distance between you has the effect of bringing the relationship into balance. In other cases, more intense effort and attention may be required. You may want to set aside time to talk and come up with solutions together. Remember to have compassion for each other. You’re in the same boat together and trying to maintain the right balance of space and togetherness to keep your relationship healthy and thriving. Express faith and confidence in each other, and enjoy the slow dance of intimacy that can resume between the two of you. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I no longer argue with people who believe that satisfaction of our natural desires is the primary purpose of life. It’s not our business in The Program to knock material achievement. When we stop and think about it, in fact, no group of people ever made a worse mess of trying to live by that “la dolce vita” formula than we did. We always insisted on more than our share — in all areas. And even when we seemed to be succeeding, we fueled our addictions so that we could dream of still greater successes. Am I learning that material satisfactions are simply by-products and not the chief aim of life? Am I gaining the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values must come first? Today I Pray May I recognize that I never did handle excesses very well, based on my past experience. I have been apt to “want more” of whatever it is I have — love, money, property, things, chemicals, foods, winnings. May The Program teach me that I must concentrate on my spiritual, rather than my material bounty. Today I Will Remember It’s okay to be spiritually greedy. ************************************* One More Day There is no formula for easy living. Anyone who says he has one is either joking or lying. –Harold Russel We all have, in our mind’s eye, a picture of what life would be like if we were healthy and wealthy and could do whatever we wanted with our days. If given the choice between health and sickness, wealth and poverty,, most people would choose the former of both. Yet, there are no assurances of easy living no matter how healthy or wealthy we are. When our wish to “have it easy” becomes a preoccupation — our whole system can become stressed. We need to recognize that this wish for “having it easy” creates stress that we could avoid. Ironically, to escape this stress, we need to return to the reality of our own beautiful lives. I have no guarantee for easy living, but I am guaranteed the chance to change and grow as often as I want to. ************************************ Food For Thought Appetite Is Not Hunger Confusing a "hearty" appetite with genuine, physical hunger is a mistake made consistently by compulsive overeaters. Our idea of how much food our body needs is usually a great exaggeration of the actual requirement. Because of an overdeveloped appetite, we are unfamiliar with the feeling of true hunger. Since we cannot rely on subjective feelings to tell us how much we need to eat, we require an objective, definite plan. When we reach our normal weight, we continue to eat according to a measured food plan, rather than according to appetite. We will never be able to satisfy the demands of our appetite without destroying ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually. When we think we require more food than is called for by our plan, we need to examine our thinking. Usually we find that we are being deluded by the demands of our overdeveloped appetite. We would like to eat more, but in fact, our body does not need more. I pray for the wisdom to distinguish between appetite and hunger. ***************************************** One Day At A Time THE PROMISES “We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.” The Big Book When I first came into program and heard these words I couldn't grasp their meaning. Life baffled me. I had no idea who I was or what I was doing. I was completely in the grip of this disease. I felt like I was the disease. Why would God do anything for me? Initially I thought these people were crazy and even worse off than I was. My opinion soon changed when I noticed wonderful differences between them and myself. They seemed calmer, verbalized their feelings more clearly, appeared to have their act together, and seemed to enjoy life. I was hooked! I wanted what they had. I finally wanted to want to live. I was drawn to those who demonstrated traits I wanted to have. I talked to them and listened when they shared. I asked them how to work the program and how to find my Higher Power. I started working the Steps. I began my search for a God I could relate to. I found online recovery loops and people who shared how they worked their program. Then I had a crisis develop which almost overwhelmed me. Yet as I read the Big Book, I realized that the promises God had given to the other program people were given to me too. I had been so busy working this program that I needed to pause and examine all I had received. Yes, it does work when you work it. I proved it to myself by allowing God to prove it to me. One Day at a Time . . . I will remember that the promises really are for everyone and that they come into my life as I work my program to the best of my ability. ~ Judith A. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no 'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps. I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit. Reinvestment I have been through a journey of forgiveness. I've faced my anger and hurt and brought order and clarity to my inner world. I've accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things that I could. Because I've shown the courage to face my inner demons and look them in the eye, I feel stronger and more competent. Forgiveness of my self and others has offered me a way out of pain and confusion, and now I find I have a renewed interest in life. I see things differently. I feel liberated from something that was tying up me energy. And I recognize and accept my own humanity, and the humanity of others. I am ready and willing to reinvest in the ideal of love. I want to find worthy projects and passions, and put my energy toward them. I have something to give to the world and the world has something to give to me. I am right where I am supposed to be and I've met the challenges of my life. I am ready to live. I invest my energy with care and gusto - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote It is better to have some-one sober and hating you because you told them the truth, rather than have someone drunk and liking you because you told them a lie. I don't heap on the bull**** when the truth is like Miracle Grow "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Along the road well traveled, there are many pity potholes. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If you went to a critical AIDS ward and said 'I've got a deal for you; would you come with me to some meetings, meet and chat with some people, take some actions that seem strange to you - would you do that if I could arrest your AIDS? They'd sign over their homes to you. But, go to the alcoholism ward where they're dying from this disease, and they won't go to an AA meeting two doors down the hall. - Clancy I.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
11-10-2024, 05:43 AM | #20 |
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November 20
Daily Reflections "THY WILL, NOT MINE" . . . when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each one of them this qualification. ." . . . if it be Thy will." TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 102-03 I ask simply that throughout the day God place in me the best understanding of His will that I can have for that day, and that I be given the grace by which I may carry it out. As the day goes on, I can pause when facing situations that must be met and decisions that must be made, and renew the simple request: "Thy will, not mine, be done." I must always keep in mind that in every situation I am responsible for the effort and God is responsible for the outcome. I can "Let Go and Let God" by humbly repeating: "Thy will, not mine, be done." Patience and persistence in seeking His will for me will free me from the pain of selfish expectations. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I no longer try to escape life through alcoholism. Drinking built up an unreal world for me and I tried to live in it. But in the morning light the real world was back again and facing it was harder than ever, because I had less resources with which to meet it. Each attempt at escape weakened my personality by the very attempt. Everyone knows that alcohol, by relaxing inhibitions, permits a flight from reality. Alcohol deadens the brain cells that preside over our highest faculties and we are off to the unreal world of drunkenness. A.A. taught me not to run away, but to face reality. Have I given up trying to escape life? Meditation For The Day In these times of quiet meditation, try more and more to set your hopes on the grace of God. Know that whatever the future may hold, it will hold more and more of good. Do not set all your hopes and desires on material things. There is weariness in an abundance of things. Set your hopes on spiritual things so that you may grow spiritually. Learn to rely on God's power more and more and in that reliance you will have an insight into the greater value of things of the spirit. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not be overwhelmed by material things. I pray that I may realize the higher value of spiritual things. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Easy Does It--But Do It, p. 322 Procrastination is really sloth in five syllables. << << << >> >> >> "My observation is that some people can get by with a certain amount of postponement, but few can live with outright rebellion." << << << >> >> >> "We have succeeded in confronting many a problem drinker with that awful alternative, 'This we A.A.'s do, or we die.' Once this much is firmly in his mind, more drinking only turns the coil tighter. "As many an alcoholic has said, 'I came to the place where it was either into A.A. or out the window. So here I am!" 1. 12 & 12, p. 67 2. Letter, 1952 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Estrangements Amends A number of alcoholics become estranged from members of their family. Sometimes these estrangements continue into sobriety and fester as a source of resentment. Where estrangements have occurred, we are always responsible for any wrongs on our part. We need to check carefully to make sure that pride and bitterness on our part aren't prolonging the estrangement. But some of these estrangements have been chosen by others. We need to accept them if we've done everything possible to correct the problem. Honesty will be our guide as we look carefully at any estrangements in our lives. All that's ever necessary is that we use our best principles in dealing with any estrangements. If I find today that an estrangement is bothering me or others in the program, I'll examine it carefully with the thought that either making amends or acceptance might be required. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple A man is too apt to forget that in this world he cannot have everything. A choice is all that is left him.---H. Mathews. Sobriety is about choice. Each day we choose to stay sober, we teach ourselves how to make better choices. Life is about choice. To be spiritual people, we must make spiritual choices. Honesty is a spiritual choice. And working the Steps is a spiritual choice. Our life is the sum total of our choices. We owe it to ourselves to choose wisely. We can do that now, thanks to the program. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me choose a spiritual way of life. Help me to see choice as my way to a better relationship with you. Action for the Day: Today, I'll be aware of the many choices I make. At the end of the day, I'll think about all the choices I've made. Am I proud of my choices? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills. --Minna Antrim It is not by chance but by design that the sorrows we experience throughout our lives are countered by equal servings of joy. One offsets the other. And we are strengthened by their combination. Our longing for only life's joys is human--also folly. Joy would become insipid if it were our steady diet. Joyful times serve us well as respites from the trying situations that push our growth and development as women. Laughter softens the cutting edges of the lessons we seek or are cornered by. It offers perspective when the outlook is bleak. And for those of us who are recovering, wallowing in the bleaker times used to be acceptable behavior. But no more. The reality is that each day will present both occasions for anguish and ones inviting easy laughter. Both are valuable. Neither should dominate. Joy and sorrow are analogous to the ebb and flow of the ocean tide. They are natural rhythms. And we are mellowed by their presence when we accept them as necessary to our very existence. Any pain today guarantees an equal amount of pleasure, if I willingly accept them both. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY For the next few years fortune threw money and applause my way. I had arrived. My judgment and ideas were followed by many to the tune of paper millions. The great boom of the late twenties was seething and swelling. Drink was taking an important and exhilarating part in my life. There was loud talk in the jazz places uptown. Everyone spent in thousands and chattered in millions. Scoffers could scoff and be damned. I made a host of fair-weather friends. p. 3 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. I grew up feeling as if I was the only thing keeping my family together. This, compounded by the fear of not being good enough, was a lot of pressure for a little girl. Everything changed with my first drink at the age of sixteen. All the fear, shyness, and disease evaporated with the first burning swallow of bourbon straight from the bottle during a liquor cabinet raid at a slumber party. I got drunk, blacked out, threw up, had dry heaves, was sick to death the next day, and I knew I would do it again. For the first time, I felt part of a group without having to be perfect to get approval. pp. 328-329 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." Practicing Step Three is like the opening of a door which to all appearances is still closed and locked. All we need is a key, and the decision to swing the door open. There is only one key, and it is called willingness. Once unlocked by willingness, the door opens almost of itself, and looking through it, we shall see a pathway beside which is an inscription. It reads: "This is the way to a faith that works." In the first two Steps we were engaged in reflection. We saw that we were powerless over alcohol, but we also perceived that faith of some kind, if only in A.A. itself, is possible to anyone. These conclusions did not require action; they required only acceptance. p. 34 ************************************************** ********* "Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect." --Margaret Mitchell "Faith is the only known cure for fear." --Lena K. Sadler The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present. --Barbara De Angelis Love is the master key which opens the gates of happiness. --Oliver Wendell Holmes Sometimes we are so busy adding up our troubles that we forget to count our blessings. --unknown The right word spoken at the right time sometimes achieves miracles. --unknown Love is the only thing you get more of by giving it away. --Tom Wilson *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation YESTERDAYS "When I want to understand what is happening today or try to decide what will happen tomorrow, I look back." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. The writing is on the wall! My writing is on my wall and it is to be found in my life. My history of my life teaches me about my alcoholism. Alcoholism is a personal disease; it affects others through self. Sometimes I am tempted to forget the past. Why live in yesterday? Because the events of my yesterdays affect my today. The future is forged from the recognition of my past. My disease grew strong in my denial. My recovery began with the acceptance of reality my reality. Today does not exist in a vacuum and my tomorrows are determined by the decisions I make today. I also know and believe that my recovering life demands a true recognition of my yesterdays. Thank You for the historical progressiveness of my recovery. ************************************************** ********* He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction. Proverbs 13:3 "This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:6-7 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Time is yours to use or lose. Lord, teach me to avoid all upsetting thoughts and create a heart that glories in my time as a peaceful gift from You. Begin each day with the certainty that today is the best day of your life and watch what happens. Lord, I celebrate my life and give thanks for everything because for everything there is a reason. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Finding Fulfillment "We weren't oriented toward fulfillment; we focused on the emptiness and worthlessness of it all." Basic Text p. 86 There were probably hundreds of times in our active addiction when we wished we could become someone else. We may have wished we could trade places with someone who owned a nice car or had a larger home, a better job, a more attractive mate - anything but what we had. So severe was our despair that we could hardly imagine anyone being in worse shape than ourselves. In recovery, we may find we are experiencing a different sort of envy. We may continue to compare our insides with others' outsides and feel as though we still don't have enough of anything. We may think everyone, from the newest member to the oldest old-timer, sounds better at meetings than we do. We may think that everyone else must be working a better program because they have a better car, a larger home, more money, and so on. The recovery process experienced through our Twelve Steps will take us from an attitude of envy and low self-esteem to a place of spiritual fulfillment and deep appreciation for what we do have. We find that we would never willingly trade places with another, for what we have discovered within ourselves is priceless. Just for today: There is much to be grateful for in my life. I will cherish the spiritual fulfillment I have found in recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Without solitude, there can be no real people. --John Euder We all need some time alone. It's a good idea to set aside a few minutes every day to be alone with ourselves. This is a very special time that is all our own. It's a time to relax and refresh ourselves. This goes for every member of the family, and it's important that we allow others some time for themselves. It shows them we respect, love, and care about them. Without that solitude, they cannot be truly themselves--and neither can we. Nature teaches us that each thing, even the earth itself, needs a retreat. Bears hibernate; cats crawl off out of sight, even the plants disappear for the winter. It is this time that refreshes life for the Spring to come. If we want to have healthy, fulfilling relationships with each other, we all need time to ourselves every day. Without being "real people"--truly ourselves--how can we be full members of our family? How can I better spend my time alone today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The most important function of art and science is to awaken the cosmic religious feeling and keep it alive. --Albert Einstein There is no need to be concerned about a conflict between science and the spiritual life. People have turned to the spiritual in many ways since the beginning of humanity. Some are tribal and primitive, some very emotional, some focused on ideas and philosophy, some centered on tradition. Perhaps in the very center of our humanness is a spiritual compass. When we disown that orientation, do we lose some of our humanness? This program did not invent the spiritual outlook. It only tells us recovery will come through awakening of the spiritual within us. We are on an exploration. We give ourselves over to it and only discover where our awakening will lead as it unfolds. The Steps tell us to engage with the God of our understanding, to develop a relationship of trust, total openness and humility, and to improve the contact. As the center of our humanness is restored, we come alive and our daily tasks take on new meaning. May I be awakened again to that cosmic feeling we all inherit. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Continuous effort--not strength or intelligence--is the key to unlocking our potential. --Liane Cordes Perseverance may well be our greatest asset. As we forge ahead on a project, it loses its power over us. Our confidence and abilities grow in concert with our progress on the project, preparing us to tackle the next one too. We have something special, uniquely our own to offer in this life. And we also have the potential to offer it successfully. However, we don't always realize our potential. Many of us stifled our development with fears of failure, low self-worth, assumed inadequacies. The past need plague us no longer. Help is readily available for us to discover our capacities for success. Abilities stand ready to be tapped, goals and projects await our recognition. Any commitment we make to a task that draws our interest will be reinforced by God's commitment to our efforts. We have a partner. Our efforts are always doubled when we make them--truly make them. I will not back away from a project today. I will persevere and find completion. I'll feel completed. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Wants and Needs` So many of us have been brainwashed to think that we can't have what we want in life. That is the belief of the martyr. It is born of deprivation and fear. Identifying what we want and need, then writing it down, sets in motion a powerful chain of events. It indicates that we are taking responsibility for ourselves, giving God and the Universe permission to supply our wants and needs. The belief that we deserve to have a change in character, a relationship, a new dimension to an existing relationship, a possession, a certain level of health, living, loving, or success, is a powerful force in bringing that desire to pass. Often, when we realize that we want something, that feeling is God preparing us to receive it! Listen. Trust. Empower the good in your life by paying attention to what you want and need. Write it down. Affirm it mentally. Pray about it. Then, let it go. Give it to God, and see what happens. The results may be better than you think. Today, I will pay attention to what I want and need. I will take time to write it down, and then I will let it go. I will begin to believe I deserve the best. Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Let Yourself Play How long has it been since you played? How long has it been since you played at your life, had fun with it? Our imaginations are so delightful when we’re young. Watch a child sit in the middle of the floor and build castles with blocks. Watch a child play– any object can be anything, and anything can be fun. Life can pound that out of us if we let it. Breathe life back into your imagination. Come back to life. Let yourself see dragons in clouds and leprechauns in trees and velvet in a rose. Imagine what it would be like to grab a handful of cloud. Then touch the tree. And put the rose in your cheek. Let your imagination come alive. Play the game of “What if?” What if anything could be anything. What if life could be fun? ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Be prepared Did you ever have a teacher in school who warned you at the beginning of the year that he would give tests without previous notice, so be prepared? We might not have liked it, but we appreciated being warned. We knew in that class that we needed to do our homework in a timely manner if we wanted a good grade. We kept our awareness up. We knew we couldn’t slide by. When that test came, we were either prepared for it or at the very least, aware. We had been warned. We knew the test was coming. When I decided to stop using alcohol and drugs and live a life of abstinence and recovery, I was tested many times. People put drugs and alcohol in my hand. Once, in the early months, soon after my decision, I failed the test and felt awful. Then I learned that important lesson, life would challenge my decision from time to time. I had to be prepared not only to make the choice to be sober, but to stand behind that decision each day. When I decided to become a writer, things moved along well for the first few years, then I began hitting some walls. I hit a dry spell. No words came out. The results weren’t as I had planned. It was time to decide if I wanted to stand behind my decision or fold. We will be given tests without notice, on almost every decision we make and boundary we set. Each time we say I can, we will be tested. And drawing from personal experience, the test is never one we would have chosen. It’s often ugly, inconvenient, and hits us at our weakest spot. Don’t feel victimized or tortured when out test comes. Be prepared. Let it teach you more about yourself, what you want, and how badly you want it. Use it as resistance, the kind we can push against to become clearer about who we are and what we want. Sometimes we don’t really want what we thought we did. Other times we do. We aren’t in school anymore, at least not grade school. The test isn’t for the teacher’s benefit. It’s for our benefit– to teach us how much we’ve learned. Don’t worry. I’ve been told we’ll never be given a test we can’t pass. So get ready. You’ve been warned. Be aware. The test could come at any time. God, help me let go of my resistance to the little tests life throws my way. Instead, help me use these tests as a chance to get to know myself and you better. Help me do my best. ***** Progressing with Patience Doing the Best You Can by Madisyn Taylor Try not to expect perfection when starting out on a spiritual path or attaining inner peace. It isn’t always easy to meet the expectations we hold ourselves to. We may find ourselves in a situation such as just finishing a relaxing yoga class or meditation retreat, a serene session of deep breathing, or listening to some calming, soul-stirring music, yet we have difficulty retaining our sense of peace. A long line at the store, slow-moving traffic, or another stressful situation can unnerve you and leave you wondering why the tranquility and spiritual equilibrium you cultivate is so quick to dissipate in the face of certain stressors. You may feel guilty and angry at yourself or even feel like a hypocrite for not being able to maintain control after practicing being centered. However, being patient with yourself will help you more in your soul’s journey than frustration at your perceived lack of progress. Doing the best you can in your quest for spiritual growth is vastly more important than striving for perfection. Just because you are devoted to following a spiritual path, attaining inner peace, or living a specific ideology doesn’t mean you should expect to achieve perfection. When you approach your personal evolution mindfully, you can experience intense emotions such as anger without feeling that you have somehow failed. Simply by being aware of what you are experiencing and recognizing that your feelings are temporary, you have begun taking the necessary steps to regaining your internal balance. Accepting that difficult situations will arise from time to time and treating your reaction to them as if they are passing events rather than a part of who you are can help you move past them. Practicing this form of acceptance and paying attention to your reactions in order to learn from them will make it easier for you to return to your center more quickly in the future. Since your experiences won’t be similar to others’ and your behavior will be shaped by those experiences, you may never stop reacting strongly to the challenging situations you encounter. Even if you are able to do nothing more than acknowledge what you are feeling and that there is little you can do to affect your current circumstances, in time you’ll alter your reaction to such circumstances. You can learn gradually to let negative thoughts come into your mind, recognize them, and then let them go. You may never reach a place of perfect peace, but you’ll find serenity in having done your best. ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I’ve come to measure success in a whole new way. My success today isn’t limited by social or economic benchmarks. Success is mine today, no matter what the undertaking, when I tap the power of god within me and allow myself to be an open channel for the expression of His good. The spirit of success works through me as creative ideas and useful service — as efficient use of my time and energy, and as cooperative effort with others. Will I try to keep my mind centered in the realization that within me is the God -implanted power to succeed? Today I Pray May I develop a new concept of success, based on measurements of the good qualities which come from God’s treasure-filled bank of good. To draw from that bank, all I have to do is look within myself. May I know that God’s riches are the only kind that are fully insurable, because they are infinite. May I look in God’s bank for my security. Today I Will Remember Spiritual “success” is my security. ************************************* One More Day There is no hope unmingled with fear, and no fear unmingled with hope. – Baruch Spinoza Most of us are frightened each time we go through a major life change, for we fear what we do not know. We thought we had our lived planned. Because a crisis occurs unexpectedly, there is no way to prepare for a burglary, a broken leg, or a loss of a loved one. these events can throw us and our lives into a tailspin. If the event is short-lived, like a bad case of the flu or a minor injury, we forget it quickly. If, however, the effects are long-lasting, we work to incorporate them into our daily living. Adapting in this way forces us to look for the positive parts of the day. We get into the habit of remembering good times and hope — even expect — better times to come. I can see that positive action and thought is needed. I will find good people and events in this day. ************************************ Food For Thought Eating For Mother As babies and children, we made Mother happy by eating what she gave us. Since our emotions were closely tied to hers, when she was happy, we were also happy. We may have developed the mistaken notion that the more we ate, the happier Mother would be and, therefore, the happier we would be. This illusion may be persisting into our adult life. On some level, we may not yet realize that no amount of food we can eat will make Mother permanently happy, anymore than it will make us happy. We may have eaten many times in the past in order to please Mother, rather than because we really wanted food. Subconsciously, we may still think we could please her by consuming more food than we need. Working the OA program often brings to light other things we are doing in order to please someone else. Since each individual is responsible for his or her own happiness, there is nothing we can do to ensure the happiness of another individual. Realizing this on a gut level is a powerful tool for maintaining abstinence. May I realize the/utility of eating to please someone else. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ PATIENCE ~ Patience is the key to paradise. Turkish proverb I used to be the queen of the "quick fix." Anything I wanted done had to be done today, if not yesterday. I'd even do a job myself because I couldn't wait for someone else to do it in their time. I ended up chasing my tail most days, and trying to run the show myself, simply because I couldn't wait. Even all the many diets that I went on had to get results fast or they weren't worth their salt. Small wonder, being the compulsive person that I was, that when I wanted to eat, there was no such thing in my vocabulary as delayed gratification. When I wanted it, I had to have it right then. Imagine my horror at coming into the program and seeing that people who had been in the fellowship for years were still there. Surely they should have gotten it right by now and graduated from this program. But I soon learned that this is not something we graduate from. Recovery and abstinence happen in God's time, not mine. I've had to learn that this a journey. Progress can sometimes be painfully slow, but the rewards for those who wait for the miracle is a gift I wouldn't want to be without. Not only am I offered freedom from compulsive eating, but also sanity and serenity to live my life the way I was intended to do. One Day at a Time . . . Even when progress seems slow, I will keep coming back and working the program to the best of my ability, knowing that recovery will come to me if I wait. ~ Sharon S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When intense cravings for our drug of choice overwhelm us, we immediately talk to another person in recovery, no matter the time. Our program teaches us to rely on each other and they will welcome the contact! Give me the strength to contact another clean and sober person BEFORE I think of satisfying that craving. The Creative Power of My Thoughts Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being there for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were mine. I will be specific about what I see, smell, feel, and I will accept my inner vision as fully as possible. I will enjoy my vision, then let it go and move on in my day, releasing it with no thought of controlling it further. I will let it happen, if it is right for me, in God's time. All good things are possible for me. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote We may have empathy for your situation but we will not pity you. We know that pitying you leads to you pitying yourself which leads to mind-affecting chemicals. Rather than pity you, if you need an attitude adjustment, it's very likely a fellow group member will let you know. Attitudes are contagious. Is mine worth catching? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Don't 'people please', 'Higher Power Please.' Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote They take good scotch, put juice, soda, bitters and God knows what in it, shake it up, stick an umbrella in it - That's alcohol abuse. - Anon.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
Yesterday, 06:13 AM | #21 |
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November 21
Daily Reflections A CLASSIC PRAYER Lord, make me a channel for thy peace - that where there is hatred, I may bring love - that where there is wrong. I may bring the spirit of forgiveness - that where there is discord, I may bring harmony - that where there is error, I may bring truth - that where there is doubt, I may bring faith - that where there is despair, I may bring hope - that where there are shadows, I may bring light - that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted - to understand, than to be understood - to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life. Amen. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 99 No matter where I am in my spiritual growth, the St. Francis prayer helps me improve my conscious contact with the God of my understanding. I think that one of the great advantages of my faith in God is that I do not understand Him, or Her, or It. It may be that my relationship with my Higher Power is so fruitful that I do not have to understand. All that I am certain of is that if I work the Eleventh Step regularly, as best I can, I will continue to improve my conscious contact, I will know His will for me, and I will have the power to carry it out. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I no longer waste money, but try to put it to good use. Like all of us, when I was drunk, I threw money around "like a drunken sailor." It gave me a feeling of importance--a millionaire for a day. But the morning after, with an empty wallet and perhaps some undecipherable checks to boot, was a sad awakening. One of the hardest things to face is the fact of wasted money. How could I have been such a fool? How will I ever make it up? Thoughts like these get you down. When we are sober, we spend our hard earned money as it should be spent. Although some of us could be more generous in our A.A. giving, at least we do not throw it away. Am I making good use of my money? Meditation For The Day You were meant to be at home and comfortable in the world. Yet some people live a life of quiet desperation. This is the opposite of being at home and at peace with the world. Let your peace of mind be evident to those around you. Men should see that you are comfortable, and seeing it, know that it springs from your trust in a higher power. The dull, hard way of resignation is not God's way. Faith takes the sting out of the winds of adversity and brings peace even in the midst of struggle. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be more comfortable in my way of living. I pray that I may feel more at home and at peace with myself. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Groping Toward God, p. 323 "More than most people, I think, alcoholics want to know who they are, what this life is about, whether they have a divine origin and an appointed destiny, and whether there is a system of cosmic justice and love. "It is the experience of many of us in the early stages of drinking to feel that we have had glimpses of the Absolute and a heightened feeling of identification with the cosmos. While these glimpses and feelings doubtless have a validity, they are deformed and finally swept away in the chemical, spiritual, and emotional damage wrought by the alcohol itself. "In A.A., and in many religious approaches, alcoholics find a great deal more of what they merely glimpse and felt while trying to grope their way toward God in alcohol." Letter, 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Alcoholism in the workplace Employment Most of the personal stories in AA include troubles in the workplace. This is not surprising, because the disease itself almost guarantees that an active alcoholic is likely to make more mistakes, have higher absenteeism, and get into trouble with bosses and/or fellow employees. Who really wants a practicing alcoholic on the payroll? Who would want such a person as a manager or employer? Who wants to be treated by a doctor who is drunk or badly hung over. If our alcoholism created problems in the workplace, we have no moral right to blame others who held us accountable for this. Far from blaming others who were critical of us, we owe personal amends for any harm we caused employers or fellow workers. The good news is that recovery makes it possible for us to perform up to acceptable standards at work and carry out our responsibilities. In sobriety, we can write a new chapter and establish a good work history. In my work today, I'll keep in mind the wonderful advantages I have as a result of knowing and practicing the AA principles. As a recovering alcoholic, I can be a positive force in an organization. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To love others, we must first learn to love ourselves.---Anonymous Sometimes we think our life would be fine if that dream person showed up. But loving someone isn’t easy. Our bad habits cause problems. We have to change. Sometimes we aren’t ready to have on especial person. We have to have a group of people---our recovery group---to love and help us get healthy. We must learn to trust, to be honest, to give help, and to love others. The truth is, no one person can make our life wonderful---except us. We hold happiness inside of us. It’s in our spirit. Look no further. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me love myself Action for the Day: I’ll list five ways I will love myself today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Continuous effort--not strength or intelligence--is the key to unlocking our potential. --Liane Cordes Perseverance may well be our greatest asset. As we forge ahead on a project, it loses its power over us. Our confidence and abilities grow in concert with our progress on the project, preparing us to tackle the next one too. We have something special, uniquely our own to offer in this life. And we also have the potential to offer it successfully. However, we don't always realize our potential. Many of us stifled our development with fears of failure, low self-worth, assumed inadequacies. The past need plague us no longer. Help is readily available for us to discover our capacities for success. Abilities stand ready to be tapped, goals and projects await our recognition. Any commitment we make to a task that draws our interest will be reinforced by God's commitment to our efforts. We have a partner. Our efforts are always doubled when we make them--truly make them. I will not back away from a project today. I will persevere and find completion. I'll feel completed. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY My drinking assumed more serious proportions, continuing all day and almost every night. The remonstrances of my friends terminated in a row and I became a lone wolf. There were many unhappy scenes in our sumptuous apartment. There had been no real infidelity, for loyalty to my wife, helped at times by extreme drunkenness, kept me out of those scrapes. p. 3 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. I went through college on scholarships, work study programs, and student loans. Classes and work kept me too busy to do much drinking, plus I was engaged to a boy who was not alcoholic. However, I broke off our relationship during my senior year, after discovering drugs, sex, and rock n' roll--companions to my best friend, alcohol. I proceeded to explore all that the late sixties and early seventies offered. After backpacking around Europe, I decided to settle in a large city. p. 329 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." Like all the remaining Steps, Step Three calls for affirmative action, for it is only by action that we can cut away the self-will which has always blocked the entry of God--or, if you like, a Higher Power--into our lives. Faith, to be sure, is necessary, but faith alone can avail nothing. We can have faith, yet keep God out of our lives. Therefore our problem now becomes just how and by what specific means shall we be able to let Him in? Step Three represents our first attempt to do this. In fact, the effectiveness of the whole A.A. program will rest upon how well and earnestly we have tried to come to "a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." pp. 34-35 ************************************************** ********* Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful. --Annette Funicello Happiness is an inside job. --unknown "People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges." --Joseph Fort Newton AA is not something you join, it's a way of life. --unknown I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment. --Ruth Fishel Don't stare at the steps of success - step up the stairs. --American Proverb *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation HEROES "Self-trust is the essence of heroism." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson In my recovery I have become my hero. It sounds egotistical but it is part of my program of self-love. I have many other heroes but today I respect myself. Today I believe that God is involved in my life; an aspect of divinity exists within me. I trust me with my life, and I am proud of the daily choices I make for my sobriety. Spirituality allows me to be my hero today because it is with my respect of self that I can truly respect others; the awareness of my dignity affords dignity to others; my personal healing brings healing to others. Today I am the center of my universe. Thank You for the awareness of the achievements and successes in my life; today I am my own winner. ************************************************** ********* "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in Heaven." Matthew 5:16 "As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12 And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. 2 John 1:6 The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:17-18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Don't spoil what you already have by using up your time wanting what you don't have. Lord, may I live with gratitude and take back my life because my life is not and never will be in the hands of fate. When you feel anger, allow yourself no more than 5 minutes because after that, anger is self-indulging and turns quickly to hatred and rage. Lord, You are a forgiving God. Heal my hurts. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Letting Our Defects Go "If [character defects] contributed to our health and happiness, we would not have come to such a state of desperation." Basic Text pg. 34 Getting started on the Sixth and Seventh Steps isn't always easy. We may feel as though we have so much wrong with us that we are totally defective. We might feel like hiding under a rock. Under no circumstance would we want our fellow addicts to know about our inadequacies. We will probably go through a time of examining everything we say and do in order to identify our character defects and make sure we suppress them. We may look back at one particular day, cringing at what we're certain is the most embarrassing thing we've ever said. We become determined to be rid of these horrible traits at all costs. But nowhere in the Sixth or Seventh Steps does it say we can learn to control our defects of character. In fact, the more attention we focus on them, the more firmly entrenched they will become in our lives. It takes humility to recognize that we can't control our defects any more than we can control our addiction. We can't remove our own defects; we can only ask a loving God to remove them. Letting go of something painful can be as difficult as letting go of something pleasant. But let's face it - holding on is a lot of work. When we really think about what we're holding onto, the effort just isn't worthwhile. It's time to let go of our character defects and ask God to remove them. Just for today: I'm ready to have my defects removed. I will let go and allow a loving Higher Power to care for me. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. We decided that it was no good asking what is the meaning of life, because life isn't an answer, life is the question, and you, yourself, are the answer. --Ursula K. LeGuin How many times have we felt like we were drifting aimlessly, constantly searching for meaning in a world that seems so mixed up, seeking direction but getting nowhere? But looked at differently, "nowhere" becomes "now here." When we take things apart, stand back, and examine them from a different angle, we often find we held the answer from the beginning. Sometimes, when we're convinced we are the problem, we discover we were the solution all along. When we look for true understanding, we can be sure it exists in this moment, and that we can find it within ourselves, with God's help. What question do I seek an answer to today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. For the trouble is that we are self-centered, and no effort of the self can remove the self from the centre of its own endeavor. --William Temple This quagmire of troubles we men were caught in came, in part, from our best efforts to be self-sufficient. The harder we worked to provide our own cures, to control others in our lives, or to control ourselves, the more we fixed our attention upon ourselves. We could not see that the answers we were using were actually part of the problem, not the solution. Even today we may be partially caught in the folly of this thinking. Whenever we think we see our problems and the answers clearly but don't open our incomplete selves to the wisdom of others, we are in danger of intensifying our self-focus. When we have a pattern of telling our fellow members the completed stories of our pain only when our pain has passed, we are maintaining our self-centered system. We can't lift ourselves out of our self-centeredness. We can only turn it over to our Higher Power and allow ourselves to be released. I am grateful for the healing, which comes when I stop being so self-centered in my efforts. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. . . . as awareness increases, the need for personal secrecy almost proportionately decreases. --Charlotte Painter We hang onto secrets when we're unsure of ourselves and the role we're asked to play--secrets about our inner thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our feared inadequacies. Because we strive for perfection, assume it's achievable, and settle for no less in all our activities, we are haunted by our secret fears of not measuring up. The more committed we become to this program, the greater is our understanding of the fallacy of this way of thinking. And as our awareness increases, the more accepting we become of our human frailty, and the less need we have to cover it up. Our mental health is measurable by the openness we offer to the world. Secrets belie good health and heighten the barriers to it. The program's Fourth and Fifth Steps are the antidotes to being stuck in an unhealthy state of mind. They push us to let go of our secrets, freeing us from the power they wield. Practicing the principles of the program offers the remedy we need for the happiness we deserve. I will share a secret today and be free of its power over my life. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Financial Fears I sat in the car, looking at the sign on the door of the food shelf office: "Closed until Friday." It was Wednesday. I had two hungry children and myself; I had no money. I laid my head on the steering wheel. I couldn't take it anymore. I had been so strong, so brave, so trusting for so long. I was a single parent with two children, recently divorced. I had worked so courageously at being grateful for what I had, while setting financial goals and working at believing I deserved the best. I had put up with so much poverty, so much deprivation. Daily, I worked the Eleventh Step. I worked so hard at praying for knowledge of God's will for me only, and the power to carry it through. I believed I was doing what I needed to do in my life. I wasn't lollygagging. I was doing my best, working my hardest. And there just wasn't enough money. Life had been a struggle in many ways, but the financial struggle seemed endless. Money isn't everything, but it takes money to solve certain problems. I was sick of "letting go" and "letting go" and "letting go." I was sick of "acting as if" I had enough money. I was tired of having to work so hard daily at letting go of the pain and fear about not having enough. I was tired of working so hard at being happy without having enough. Actually, most of the time I was happy. I had found my soul in poverty. But now that I had my soul and my self, I wanted some money too. While I sat in the car trying to compose myself, I heard God speak to me in that silent, still voice that whispers gently to our souls. "You don't ever have to worry about money again, child. Not unless you want to. I told you that I would take care of you. And I will." Great, I thought. Thanks a lot. I believe you. I trust you. But look around. I have no money. I have no food. And the food shelf is closed. You've let me down. Again I heard His voice in my soul: "You don't have to worry about money again. You don't have to be afraid. I promised to meet all your needs. I went home, called a friend, and asked to borrow some money. I hated borrowing, but I had no choice. My breakdown in the car was a release, but it didn't solve a thing - that day. There was no check in the mailbox. But I got food for the day. And the next day. And the next. Within six months, my income doubled. Within nine months, it tripled. Since that day, I have had hard times, but I have never had to go without - not for more than a moment in time. Now, I have enough. Sometimes I still worry about money because that seems to be habitual. But now I know I don't have to, and I know I never did. God, help me work hard at what I believe is right for me in my life today, and I'll trust You for the rest. Help me let go of my fears about money. Help me turn that area over to You. God. Take away the blocks and barriers in my life to financial success. I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart November 21 Cherish Moments of Solitude The clerk at the lodge guided me to my cabin, a small secluded house a mile away from the main lodge on the northern California coast. “Will you be okay here?” he asked. “All by yourself?” I answered yes. And meant it. My ability to be at peace with solitude has taken a lifetime of cultivation. Peaceful solitude is different from isolation, being forced to be alone. It’s different from forced seclusion, where we grasp frantically for some kind of connection, something to make us feel not alone, then finally sink fearfully and unwillingly into isolation. On our adventures, we are called to face many fears. The universe won’t let us hide from our fears, at least not for long. One of the fears we may be called to face is fear of being alone. We may need to face it, feel it, heal fom it– or we will be grasping, settling for, surrounding ourselves with anything or anybody so we don’t have to be alone. If we don’t face it, solitude will become, instead, solitary confinement. Cultivate moments of solitude. Learn to cherish your privacy, your quiet time. Learn to be comfortable being alone with yourself. The more content you can become in moments of solitude, the more joy and love you’ll discover in times with others. Cultivate solitude. It will help you cultivate love. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go You won’t get more than you can handle … God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond that which ye are able, but with the temptation, will also make a way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. –The Bible “I’m taking care of my roommate and worrying about three of my clients. People always say that you’ll never get more than you can handle. But that;s not true if you’re trying to handle other people’s stuff. that can be too much,” a therapist and friend of mine said. Most of us have heard throughout our lives that we’ll never get more than we can handle or bear. The load will not be too heavy. If we’re given it, we can rise to the occasion and accomplish the task. They didn’t say the load wouldn’t be heavy. They didn’t say the task could easily be done. And they didn’t say we’d be given the grace and strength to bear the load of burdens that weren’t ours. Sometimes it feels like too much. I know how that feels. It’s not. You’re up to the task, whatever it is, whether it feels like you are or not. God, please give me all I need today, including enough joy. ***** Growing Day by Day Becoming a Better Person by Madisyn Taylor We understand that we want to be better but have no clear definition of what better means and that is part of the process. At some point in our lives, many of us find ourselves overcome with the desire to become better people. While we are all uniquely capable of navigating this world, we may nonetheless feel driven to grow, expand, and change. This innate need for personal expansion can lead us down many paths as we develop within the context of our individual lives. Yet the initial steps that can put us on the road to evolution are not always clear. We understand that we want to be better but have no clear definition of “better.” To ease this often frustrating uncertainty, we can take small steps, keeping our own concept of growth in mind rather than allowing others to direct the course of our journey. And we should accept that change won’t happen overnight—we may not recognize the transformations taking place within us at first. Becoming a better person in your own eyes is a whole-life project, and thus you should focus your step-by-step efforts on multiple areas of your existence. Since you likely know innately which qualities you consider good, growing as an individual is simply a matter of making an effort to do good whenever possible. Respect should be a key element of your efforts. When you acknowledge that all people are deserving of compassion, consideration, and dignity, you are naturally more apt to treat them in the manner you yourself wish to be treated. You will intuitively become a more active listener, universally helpful, and truthful. Going the extra mile in all you do can also facilitate evolution. Approaching your everyday duties with an upbeat attitude and positive expectations can help you make the world a brighter, more cheerful place. Finally, coming to terms with your values and then abiding by them will enable you to introduce a new degree of integrity and dignity into your l! ife. As you endeavor to develop yourself further, you can take pride not only in your successes, but also in the fact that you are cultivating consciousness within yourself through your choices, actions, and behaviors. While you may never feel you have reached the pinnacles of awareness you hope to achieve, you can make the most of this creative process of transformation. Becoming a better person is your choice and is a natural progression in your journey of self-awareness. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Adversity introduces man to himself, a poet once said. For me, the same is true of even imagined adversity. If I expect another person to react in a certain way in a given situation — and he or she fails to meet my expectation — well, then I hardly have the right to be disappointed or angry. Yet I occasionally still experience feelings of frustration when people don’t act or react as I think they should. Through such imagined — or, better yet, self-inflicted — adversity, I come to face to face again with my old self — the one who wanted to run the whole show. Is it time for me to finally stop expecting and to start accepting? Today I Pray May I stop putting words in people’s mouths, programming them — in my own mind — to react as I expect them to. Expectations have fooled me before; I expect unbounded love and protection from those close to me, perfection from myself, undivided attention from casual acquaintances. On the adverse side, I expected failure from myself, and rejection from others. May I stop borrowing trouble — or triumph either — from the future. Today I Will Remember Accept. Don’t expect. ************************************* One More Day To most of us the real life is the life we do not lead. –Oscar Wilde We don’t enjoy feeling envious, but there are times when we find ourselves wishing we had what others do. “I wish my body could do what hers does.” “I wish I didn’t have to take all this medicine. He doesn’t have to.” After feeling envious, we need to return to our own lives with enthusiasm. While we may not be able to do what others do or have what others have, our lives are filled with experiences that can make us rich and able people. Regardless of who we are, what we own, or how we live, each of us is living a very important life — complete with pain, memories, and pleasure. I respect myself and this life I am living. Today, I will concentrate on it’s joys and treasures. ************************************ Food For Thought Moods We used to allow our moods to determine what and how much we ate. If we were feeling good, charged up with enthusiasm, we were usually able to focus our energy on some activity other than eating. Perhaps being in a particularly good mood made it possible for us to stick to some kind of diet for a few days. When the bad moods struck, we invariably turned to excess food for consolation, and we attempted to make the bad moods go away by eating to excess. Any sort of psychic distress became a signal for food. Then, too, some of us found ourselves overeating in times of elation, because we had no other way to express our joy. When we are committed to abstinence, we have a rock like foundation for our eating habits, which no shifting mood can destroy. No matter how we may feel at a given moment, we abstain from eating compulsively. Moods change and pass away, but abstinence remains. Make firm my commitment to abstinence. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ WILLINGNESS ~ If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it then you are ready to take certain steps. Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous Willingness was one of the hardest concepts to get through my disease thinking. I was only willing to have my disease cured so I could continue indulging in my allergic substances of choice. According to the dictionary, the definition of will is "the power of choosing what one will do" and "willing, favorably inclined; ready." My disease was in control and chose for me. I didn't want to stay stuck in the food. Then I found this program. Still, I had trouble with the concept of willingness. Then I relapsed, but the food didn't cure anything. This program, like the Big Book says, had ruined it for me. So, when I found some online recovery loops I found renewed hope. Hope led me to learning about willingness from others' sharing. Then I figured, ok God, I don't want to give up the allergic substances, they are too strongly embedded in my fibers, but I am willing to ask You to grant me the willingness to let go of those substances that aren't healthy for me. I kept up this prayer for weeks. One day I discovered that it had been a week since I had thought about or eaten one of those allergic substances. I figured this must be what was meant by God doing for me what I can't do for myself. So I changed my prayer and asked God to keep making me willing, just for today, to go without those foods. It is working, not because of me, but because I was finally ready to ask for willingness. As the saying goes, "Try it, you'll like it!" I tried it and I liked the results... A God-given abstinence. Now, as I go about my day, it's becoming easier to be willing to turn more and more of my will over to the God of my understanding. One Day at a Time . . . I will go to the God of my understanding and ask for the willingness to live according to His will for me; so that I may have a life, and not self-will run riot. Judy ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon. - Pg. 59 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction. Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles. Standing in Self Today, I own the truth of my recovery. If I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home - to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me. Thank you, life, for letting me see this. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When working Steps Six and Seven we honestly have to ask ourselves 'Do I really want to give up the defect? Or do I just want to give up the result of the defect?' Being an alcoholic does not give me the excuse to act alcoholically. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You can be a human being-you don't have to be a human doing. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Knowing why I was an alcoholic doesn't help. The ship hits an iceberg, it's sinking, everyone is rowing away. But you're on the deck saying; 'I'm not leaving this baby until I understand what happened.' - Clancy I.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
Yesterday, 06:14 AM | #22 |
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November 22
Daily Reflections ONLY TWO SINS . . . . there are only two sins; the first is to interfere with the growth of another human being, and the second is to interfere with one's own growth. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 542 Happiness is such an elusive state. How often do my "prayers" for others involve "hidden" prayers for my own agenda? How often is my search for happiness a boulder in the path of growth for another, or even myself? Seeking growth through humility and acceptance brings things that appear to be anything but good, wholesome and vital. Yet in looking back, I can see that pain, struggles and setbacks have all contributed eventually to serenity through growth in the program. I ask my Higher Power to help me not cause another's lack of growth today - or my own. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have got rid of most of my boredom. One of the hardest things that a new member of A.A. has to understand is how he can stay sober and not be bored. Drinking was always the answer to all kinds of boring people and boring situations. But once you have taken up the interest of A.A., once you have given it your time and enthusiasm, boredom should not be a problem to you. A new life opens up before you that can be always interesting. Sobriety should give you so many new interests in life that you shouldn't have time to be bored. Have I got rid of the fear of being bored? Meditation For The Day "If I have not charity, I am become as sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal." Charity means to care enough about your fellow man to really want to do something for him. A smile, a word of encouragement, a word of love, goes winged on its way, simple enough it may seem, while the mighty words of an orator fall on deaf ears. Use up the odd moments of your day in trying to do some little thing to cheer up your fellow man. Boredom comes from thinking too much about yourself. Prayer For The Day I pray that my day may be brightened by some little act of charity. I pray that I may try today to overcome the self-centeredness that makes me bored. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Spirituality and Money, p. 324 Some of us still ask, "Just what is this Third Legacy business anyhow? And just how much territory does "service" take in?" Let's begin with my own sponsor, Ebby. When Ebby heard how serious my drinking was, he resolved to visit me. He was in New York; I was in Brooklyn. His resolve was not enough; he had to take action and he had to spend money. He called me on the phone and then got into the subway; total cost, ten cents. At the level of the telephone booth and subway turnstile, spirituality and money began to mix. One without the other would have amounted to nothing at all. Right then and there, Ebby established the principle that A.A. in action calls for the sacrifice of much time and a little money. A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 140-141 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Too smart to stay sober Humility "I've never seen anybody who's too dumb to stay sober. But I've met a few people who were too smart." These wise words by an older member sum up what we sometimes see.... people who feel turned off by the program because it seems to simple and involves so many people of ordinary education and backgrounds. Alcoholism is much like other diseases in the way it strikes all people. Diabetes, for example, victimizes people of all intelligence and education levels. We could never believe that being smart would give us an advantage in dealing with such an illness. In the same way, the very smart person, has no edge over others in gaining sobriety. In fact, pride in such gifts can be a stumbling block. It can be a barrier to the simple acceptance and surrender needed for success in the 12 Step Program. We do have many very smart people in AA. They are also wise enough to know that nobody can outsmart John Barleycorn. We can feel grateful for mental abilities and education that halp us get along in the world. Our sobriety, however, is a separate type of gift that we did not create. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple We are healed of a suffering only be experiencing it in full. ---Marcel Proust We must never forget our past. We need to remember the power that our illness has over us. Why? So we can remember how our recovery began. So we can remember we’re not cured. So we can tell our stories. We must remember how we acted. Why? So we don’t act and think like addicts. Most of us had a poor relationships with friends, family, and ourselves. We need to remember how lonely we felt. That way, we’ll make recovery grow stronger One Day at a Time. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me always remember how my illness almost destroyed me. Help me face the pain of these memories. Action for the Day: I will talk about my past life with those who support my recovery. I will tell them what it is that I must remember about my past. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning . . . as awareness increases, the need for personal secrecy almost proportionately decreases. --Charlotte Painter We hang onto secrets when we're unsure of ourselves and the role we're asked to play--secrets about our inner thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our feared inadequacies. Because we strive for perfection, assume it's achievable, and settle for no less in all our activities, we are haunted by our secret fears of not measuring up. The more committed we become to this program, the greater is our understanding of the fallacy of this way of thinking. And as our awareness increases, the more accepting we become of our human frailty, and the less need we have to cover it up. Our mental health is measurable by the openness we offer to the world. Secrets belie good health and heighten the barriers to it. The program's Fourth and Fifth Steps are the antidotes to being stuck in an unhealthy state of mind. They push us to let go of our secrets, freeing us from the power they wield. Practicing the principles of the program offers the remedy we need for the happiness we deserve. I will share a secret today and be free of its power over my life. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY In 1929 I contracted golf fever. We went at once to the country, my wife to applaud while I started out to overtake Walter Hagen. Liquor caught up with me much faster than I came up behind Walter. I began to be jittery in the morning. Golf permitted drinking every day and every night. It was fun to carom around the exclusive course which had inspired such awe in me as a lad. I acquired the impeccable coat of tan one sees upon the well-to-do. The local banker watched me whirl fat checks in and out of his till with amused skepticism. pp. 3-4 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. Well, I made it all right, to full-blown alcoholism. A big city is a great place to be an alcoholic. Nobody notices. Three-martini lunches. drinks after work, and a nightcap at the corner bar was just a normal day. And didn't everyone have blackouts? I used to joke about how great blackouts were because you saved so much time in transit. One minute you're here, the next minute you're there! In retrospect, making jokes, just laughing it off helped solidify my unfaltering denial. Another trick was selecting companions who drank just a little bit more than I did. Then I could always point to their problem. p. 329 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." To every worldly and practical-minded beginner, this Step looks hard, even impossible. No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his own will and his own life over to the care of whatever God he thinks there is? Fortunately, we who have tried it, and with equal misgivings, can testify that anyone, anyone at all, can begin to do it. We can further add that a beginning, even the smallest, is all that is needed. Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. Though self-will may slam it shut again, as it frequently does, it will always respond the moment we again pick up the key of willingness. p. 35 ************************************************** ********* A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work. --Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES We all have ability. The difference is how we use it. --Stevie Wonder Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes and move on. --Les Brown It is in the silence of the heart that God speaks. --Mother Teresa Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. --Marcel Proust Gratitude is the heart's memory. --French proverb Real thanksgiving is thanks-living. --unknown We don't need more to be thankful for, we need to be more thankful. --unknown Life's little duties should never come before love. Make time for those you care about. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation OBESITY "Obesity is really widespread." -- Joseph O. Kern II To be fat is to be lost. It is a self-imposed isolation that keeps people sad. The fat is the result of an addiction to a series of chemicals in food that society finds acceptable; the disease of bulimia is widespread. But it can be changed. People can and do get well from a compulsion around food by surrendering to the reality of their compulsion. The people-pleasing must be seen. The mask must be removed. The pain in the family must be talked about. Feelings that have been buried behind the food for years should be expressed. Feelings are to be felt! We need not remain fat, and recovery begins when we begin to have hope; we begin to love ourselves; we begin to believe in ourselves. O Lord, You hear the prayer of all Your children help me to hear my prayers, too! ************************************************** ********* "I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart." Psalm 9:1 "Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise. Be thankful to him and bless his name." Psalm 100:4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Make it your goal to be someone that you would like to spend the rest of your life with. Lord, help me approach my day interested in everything that happens so that my life will truly be an adventure. Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Foundation First "As we begin to function in society, our creative freedom helps us sort our priorities and do the basic things first." Basic Text pg. 83 No sooner do we get clean than some of us begin putting other priorities ahead of our recovery. Careers, families, relationships - all these are part of the life we find once we've laid the foundation of our recovery. But we can't build a stable life for ourselves before we do the hard, basic work of laying our recovery foundation. Like a house built on sand, such a life will be shaky, at best. Before we begin putting all our attention to rebuilding the detailed framework of our lives, we need to lay our foundation. We acknowledge, first, that we don't yet have a foundation, that our addiction has made our lives utterly unmanageable. Then, with the help of our sponsor and our home group, we find faith in a Power strong enough to help us prepare the ground of our new lives. We clear the wreckage from the site upon which we will build our future. Finally, we develop a deep, working familiarity with the principles we will practice in our continuing affairs: honest self-examination, reliance upon our Higher Power's guidance and strength, and service to others. Once our foundation is prepared, then we can go full steam ahead to put our new lives together. But first we must ask ourselves if our foundation is secure, for without our foundation, nothing we build can stand for long. Just for today: I will take care to lay a secure foundation for my recovery. Upon such a foundation, I can build for a lifetime in recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances. --Martha Washington We all have friends who seem happy even though they run into lots of bad luck. And we all know other people who seem grumpy all the time. Nothing makes them happy. It's puzzling, but some people have decided, maybe without even knowing it, that life is fun and should be enjoyed. No bit of bad luck has to make us miserable unless we let it. A broken bike, a lost math assignment, a rained out picnic are things that might make us miserable. But we can decide they won't. Feeling happy can be a habit -- just like brushing teeth before bedtime. Will I stop and think today before I let things make me unhappy? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Without heroes, we are all plain people and don't know now far we can go. --Bernard Malamud It is useful for us to reflect on our heroes for a time. Who do we greatly admire? Are they men or women? Are they closely involved in our lives, or are they distant and beyond our ability to reach on a personal level? Can we feel hopeful and open enough about life to have heroes? Our heroes inspire us to find the new edges of our growth. We see in another man or woman the qualities and values we admire. We find our own best parts, perhaps partly hidden or undeveloped, in the people we hold as heroes. For example, if we admire a television personality, we can learn about our own values by asking what we admire in him or her. If we admire a friend, we may see a trait we hold dear in ourselves. As we grow and change, our heroes are replaced by others who fit our maturing values. As I think about people I admire, I learn about myself from them. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. All of the fantasies in your life will never match those I once tried to attain. Now older, it's more important reaching the more realistic goals, and having them come true. --Deidra Sarault Simply knowing that we are important creatures of the universe offers too little security for most of us. We do have a role to play; our talents are special and unique to each of us. Using them in a well-planned manner will benefit us emotionally and spiritually. Others will profit from our talents as well. Fantasies have their place in our lives, too. They often tempt us to even greater heights. We can't always collar our fantasies, but we can take the necessary steps to realize the goals that our fantasies have birthed. Recovery is freeing us to achieve those goals we'd only dreamed of or perhaps feared tackling in the past. The defects that we hid behind before are, with patience, giving way to positive behavior. We can accomplish our heart's pure desires. We need not let the fear of failure trap us again as it did so many of us for so long. I will set my sights high and trust the program to coach my progress. My goals are attainable. It only takes one small step at a time. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. The Magic of Gratitude and Acceptance Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work. We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master our present circumstances and then move forward into the next set of circumstances. If we become stuck, miserable, feeling trapped and hopeless, try gratitude and acceptance. If we have tried unsuccessfully to alter our present circumstances and have begun to feel like we're beating our head against a brick wall, try gratitude and acceptance. If we feel like all is dark and the night will never end, try gratitude and acceptance. If we feel scared and uncertain, try gratitude and acceptance. If we've tried everything else and nothing seems to work, try gratitude and acceptance. If we've been fighting something, try gratitude and acceptance. When all else fails, go back to the basics. Gratitude and acceptance work. Today, God, help me let go of my resistance. Help me know the pain of a circumstance will stop hurting so much if I accept it. I will practice the basics of gratitude and acceptance in my life, and for all my present circumstances. Today I am thinking about all the things I have to be grateful for and will write them down. I will make a gratitude list, adding to it every time I think of something new. By doing this I will be more aware of the things I have to be grateful for and will always have something about which I can feel good, no matter what is going on in my life. --Ruth Fishel ***** journey to the heart Open Up to Who You Are Stop criticizing yourself. Stop telling yourself everything you think, feel, want, and do is wrong. Or at least not quite right. You've been holding back, censoring yourself for too long. Your creativity, your intuition, the voice of your soul is the very voice you've been silencing. For many reasons, we learn to criticze and censor ourselves. We may have grown up with people who stifled our inner voice, our wisdom, our knowledge of truth. Our sense of the truth may have caused them to feel uneasy. So they told us to hush. It met their needs to keep us quiet. So we learned to hush ourselves. It was how we survived. No longer do we need to meet other people's needs, not that way. We don't have to be afraid of ourselves or what we will find if we look inside. We don't need to run from ourselves. We don't need to hide or hush ourselves. We are creative, loving, purposeful beings. It's time to open up to yourself, to your grandest dreams and aspirations, your real inclinations and desires, your wisdom and knowledge about what is true and what is real. Open up to who you are. Listen to yourself. Express yourself. Enjoy who you are, and you will find others emjoying you,too. ***** more language of letting go Practice the basics Not being codependent? That's a decision I need to make each day. --Anonymous Remember to practice the basics. There's a saying floating around that people talk about a lot: Lessons won't go away until they're learned. We can move, duck, hide, run, or escape by doing something else, but that lesson will still follow us around. There's another saying,too, that's not talked about as much. But it's an important lesson to remember as we go through our daily lives: Just because the lesson has been learned doesn't mean it will go away. Sometimes it appears in different shapes and forms. I used to believe that once a lesson was learned, I had it under my belt. The pain from that lesson would stop once I realized what it was. Then I could just go on with my life and put that graduation certificate in a drawer. It took me a while to realize that that wasn't necessarily true. I was learning these lessons because I would need to use that skill, awakening, value, discipline, or practice as a tool for the rest of my life. If you've got some important life lessons under your belt, congratulations. But don't put that certificate away quite yet. Instead, why don't you leave it out in plain sight? When I first began skydiving, the first fifty jumps or so were dedicated to basic training. I was learning to save my life. After that, I began to add new skills to my repertoire. I was able to move my body around and have some fun in the air, I began to learn to fly. But each time I get to the door of the plane and get ready to jump, it's important to remember everything I learned in the beginning-- the basics-- about how to save my life. Practice the basics every day or as often as you need. Whether you're in recovery, working at a craft, working on a relationship, or flying a plane, review your basics and remember to apply these principles each day in your life. Spread your wings. Learn to fly. Have a ball with your life. Learn about all the mystery and magic the universe has to offer. See how good you can get. But don't forget what you learned in the beginning. Remember to save your own life. God, help me remember to practice the basics of self-care every day of my life. ***** Fully Committed to Now Why We Are Not Shown the Big Picture by Madisyn Taylor Often we want to be shown the big picture but it is not always in our best interest as we can easily become overwhelmed. Sometimes, we may find ourselves wishing we knew what our lives are going to look like or what gifts and challenges are going to be presented to us in the coming months or years. We may want to know if the relationship we’re in now will go the distance or if our goals will be realized. Perhaps we feel like we need help making a decision and we want to know which choice will work out best. We may consult psychics, tarot cards, our dreams, and many other sources in the hopes of finding out what the future holds. Usually, at most, we may catch glimpses. And even though we think we would like to know the whole story in all its details, the truth is that we would probably be overwhelmed and exhausted if we knew everything that is going to happen to us. Just think of your life as you’ve lived it up to this point. If you are like most of us, you have probably done more and faced more than you could have ever imagined. If someone had told you as a child of all the jobs and relationships you would experience, along with each one’s inherent ups and downs, you would have become overwhelmed. With your head full of information about the future, you would have had a very hard time experiencing your life in the present moment, which is where everything actually happens. In many ways, not knowing what the future has in store brings out in us the qualities we need to grow. For example, it would have been difficult to commit yourself to certain people or projects if you knew they wouldn’t ultimately work out. Yet, it was through your commitment to see them through that you experienced the lessons you needed to grow. Looking back on your life, you would likely be hard pressed to say that anything in your past should not have happened. In fact, your most challenging experiences with their inevitable lessons may have ultimately brought you the greatest rewards. Not knowing the future keeps us just where we need to be—fully committed and in the present moment. Published with permission from Daily OM ***** A Day at a Time Reflection for the Day "We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess," wrote de Tocqueville, "but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects." We learn in The Program that our defects do have value - to the extent that we use them as the starting point for change and the pathway to better things. Fear can be a stepping stone to prudence, for example, as well as to respect for others. Fear can also help us turn away from hate and toward understanding. In the same way, pride can lead us toward the road of humility. Am I aware of my direction today? Do I care where I'm going? Today I Pray I pray that my Higher Power will show me how to use my defects in a positive way, because nothing - not even fear or selfishness or greed - is all bad. May I trust that every quality that leads me into trouble has a reverse side that can lead me out. Pride, for instance, can't puff itself up unduly without bursting and demonstrating that it is, in essence, only hot air. May I learn from my weaknesses. Today I Will Remember Good news out of bad. ************************************* One More Day “Just pray for a thick skin and a tender heart.” –Ruth Graham There are times when we become angry or hurt or disappointed by the words or actions of our friends. When we react in any of these ways, we are focusing on them instead of us. “He hurt my feelings,” we might say, or “she made me angry.” These statements point out the error in our reasoning. No one can “make” us feel a certain way. Our lives are happier and our emotions more even when we realize we are choosing our reactions. “I let myself be angry (or hurt or disappointed).” Knowing this, gives us a choice in how we let others affect us. We can be less sensitive to real or imagined wrongs. Instead, we can use our sensitivity to understand the pain of others. I will be more loving towards my friends by overlooking their flaws and underlining their strengths. ************************************ Food For Thought Depression All of us go through times of depression. When we were overeating, we may have felt depressed almost continually. We find that abstinence and the OA program lift us out of depression. The outward circumstances of life may not change radically, but by means of our program we experience more inner joy and contentment and less gloom and despair. When we do feel depressed, we can take positive action. We can work on a specific step. We can make a phone call. We can offer to help someone else. Focusing our attention on someone or something outside of ourselves is an effective means of combating depression. Maintaining abstinence does not ensure that we will never again feel depressed. In general, however, our spirits do not sink as low as they did before and they do not stay down as long. As we improve our contact with our Higher Power, we find ourselves less and less despondent. We have new hope, faith, and love - all-powerful antidotes to depression. Thank You for lifting me out of depression. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ FAMILY ~ Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. Jane Howard (from the book "The Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude" by Sarah Ban Breathnach) As an only child of parents who immigrated and left their own families behind, I have always felt that I was missing out on the great wealth of sharing and caring that I saw other people have in their families. That was before recovery. Today, I have an extended family -- not only by marriage -- but by the simple fact that my Higher Power led me to the great wealth of caring and sharing that I have found in perhaps the strangest place of all -- cyberspace -- in the form of online recovery loops. Being prone to isolation, my disease first led me to seek out others who have struggled with compulsive overeating, and that, in turn, led me to my new 'family.' As someone so wonderfully expressed it to me recently, it's a "family of choice." What a concept! My family of choice not only has sisters and brothers, it also is filled with mothers and fathers, aunts and uncles -- more than I could ever have dreamed of before, and each brings into my life more experience, strength and hope than I could ever have imagined. One Day at a Time . . . I thank God that I have found this huge, loving family that constantly offers me hope, inspiration, understanding ... and most of all love. Lorraine ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Selfishness - self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt. - Pg. 62 - How It Works Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The natural anger, fear, and sadness that accompanies your life during early recovery can cause confusion, short temperedness, and a tendency to neglect your own needs. Allow yourself the luxury of leaning on family and friends, sponsors and counselors to make decisions, offer their advice, and give you gentle reminders of what needs to be done. As I stay clean, may I learn to lean on family and friends, sponsors and counselors. Friendship Today, I make choices about my company and friends. Whom I choose to spend time with is very important to me, and the relationships that I begin I wish to respect and nurture. A handful of dear friends is far more meaningful to me than lots of acquaintances. I choose to share myself where I feel a return of good feeling. I want both to have a friend and to be a friend. One of the unusual gifts of growing up in a dysfunctional household was that I learned the value of friendship because I had to turn to my friends to meet very deep needs. I am grateful for my friends, and for what I learned and felt from them. I value friendship. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Reputation: what others are not thinking about you. What others think about me is never as important as what I think about them. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the universe. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I refuse to allow the magnetic tape of self-pity to trap me. Today I avoid negative thinking and replace it as soon as I notice it is present in me. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I was waking up with someone I didn't like - and I was sleeping alone. - Anon.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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November 23
Daily Reflections HOLD YOUR FACE TO THE LIGHT Believe more deeply. Hold your face up to the Light, even though for the moment you do not see. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 3 One Sunday in October, during my morning meditation, I glanced out the window at the ash tree in our front yard. At once I was overwhelmed by its magnificent, golden color! As I stared in awe at God's work of art, the leaves began to fall and, within minutes, the branches were bare. Sadness came over me as I thought of the winter months ahead, but just as I was reflecting on autumn's annual process, God's message came through. Like the trees, stripped of their leaves in the fall, sprout new blossoms in the spring, I had had my compulsive, selfish ways removed by God in order for me to blossom into a sober, joyful member of A.A. Thank you, God, for the changing seasons and for my ever-changing life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I no longer refuse to do anything because I cannot do it to perfection. Many of us alcoholics use the excuse of not being able to do something perfectly to enable us to do nothing at all. We pretend to be perfectionists. We are good at telling people how a thing should be done, but when we come to the effort of doing it ourselves, we balk. We say to ourselves: I might make a mistake, so I'd better let the whole thing slide. In A.A. we set our goals high, but that does not prevent us from trying. The mere fact that we will never fully reach these goals does not prevent us from doing the best we can. Have I stopped hiding behind the smoke-screen of perfectionism? Meditation For The Day "In the world ye shall have tribulation. But be of good cheer. I have overcome the world." Keep an undaunted spirit. Keep your spirit free and unconquered. You can be undefeated and untouched by failure and all its power, by letting your spirit overcome the world; rise above the earth's turmoil into the secret chamber of perfect peace and confidence. When a challenge comes to you, remember that you have God's help and nothing can wholly defeat you. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may have confidence and be of good cheer. I pray that I may not fear the power of failure. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Humility Brings Hope, p. 325 Now that we no longer patronize bars and bordellos, now that we bring home the pay checks, now that we are so very active in A.A., and now that people congratulate us on these signs of progress--well, we naturally proceed to congratulate ourselves. Of course, we are not yet within hailing distance of humility. << << << >> >> >> We ought to be willing to try humility in seeking the removal of our other shortcomings, just as we did when we admitted that we were powerless over alcohol, and came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. If humility could enable us to find the grace by which the deadly alcohol obsession could be banished, then there must be hope of the same result respecting any other problem we can possibly have. 1. Grapevine, June 1961 2. 12 & 12, p. 76 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places The only reason to drink Staying sober "There's only one real reason I can ever have for taking a drink, and that's because I want to." This remark at a meeting sums up AA's position on why we drink. We never really drink because of pressures and troubles. We drink because we want to, because we feel like taking a drink. It's true that a serious crisis, like going into bankruptcy, may make us conscious of an urger to drink. But we know that we're also likely to have such urges in the face of good fortune. The alcoholic who would drink over a bankruptcy would also probably get drunk if he or she won the lottery. By refusing to accept all of these alleged "reasons" for drinking, AA simplified our problem so we can deal with it. We either want to drink or we don't want to drink, period. Even if we want to drink... and some members do.. AA can show us how to stay sober and eventually lose such desires. Nothing has the power to make me drink today. It is only my own willingness that can destroy my sobriety. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Let me listen to me and not to them. ---Gertrude Stein Often we try to please everyone around us. But this may not make us happy, and so we get angry. We feel taken advantage of. We may be kind to others, but first we must love ourselves. How? By learning to listen to ourselves. To our dreams. To our higher power. By doing this we’ll be more happy. And those around us will probably be more happy too. As our AA medallions say, “To Thine Own Self Be True.” Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll listen to that gentle, loving voice inside me. Higher Power, help me make me make my “conscious contact” with You better. Action for the Day: I will write down why I need to be true to myself. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning When you send out real love, real love will return to you. --Florence Scovel Shinn Real love is selfless love. It expects nothing in return. It is not conditional. It doesn't keep score. It is too seldom given. Many of us came into the program hurting, feeling unloved, looking desperately for love, unable to love selflessly. But we are learning. We are climbing the same mountain, all of us. Our particular paths will cross the paths of many others before reaching the top, where we will find full enlightenment. And any path we cross has a special contribution to make to our own progress. We can be grateful for all intersecting paths, no matter how adverse they seem at the time. We can offer all our fellow-travelers real love, and our own trip will benefit manyfold. We need not be ashamed of our desire for love. Nor need we feel shame that we've bargained for it. But we do need to understand that the kind of love we seek can only be gained when we quit searching for it and simply offer it to all the people in our midst. I will look into the hearts of all the people I encounter today and offer them love. I'll receive that which I give. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition BILL'S STORY Abruptly in October 1929 hell broke loose on the New York stock exchange. After one of those days of inferno, I wobbled from a hotel bar to a brokerage office. It was eight o'clock-five hours after the market closed. The ticker still clattered. I was staring at an inch of the tape which bore the inscription XYZ-32. It had been 52 that morning. I was finished and so were many friends. The papers reported men jumping to death from the towers of High Finance. That disgusted me. I would not jump. I went back to the bar. My friends had dropped several million since ten o'clock-so what? Tomorrow was another day. As I drank, the old fierce determination to win came back. p. 4 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories Crossing The River Of Denial She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it. One such companion led to my first arrest. If the driver of the car had only pulled over when the police lights flashed, we would have been fine. If, when I had practically talked our way out of it, the driver had kept his mouth shut, we would have been fine. But no, he started babbling about how he was in rehab. I got off with a misdemeanor, and for years, I completely discounted that arrest because it was all his fault. I simply ignored that I had been drinking all day. pp. 329-330 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." Maybe this all sounds mysterious and remote, something like Einstein's theory of relativity or a proposition in nuclear physics. It isn't at all. Let's look at how practical it actually is. Every man and woman who has joined A.A. and intends to stick has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn't it true that in all matters touching upon alcohol, each of them has decided to turn his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of Alcoholics Anonymous? Already a willingness has been achieved to cast out one's own will and one's own ideas about the alcohol problem in favor of those suggested by A.A. Any willing newcomer feels sure A.A. is the only safe harbor for the foundering vessel he has become. Now if this is not turning one's will and life over to a newfound Providence, then what is it? p. 35 ************************************************** ********* Silence is also a form of speech. --West Africa Proverb Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons. --Ruth Ann Schabacker Gratitude is our most direct line to God and the angels. If we take the time, no matter how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something to be thankful for. The more we seek gratitude, the more reason the angels will give us for gratitude and joy to exist in our lives. --Terry Lynn Taylor "Our personal dispositions are as windowpanes through which we see the world either as rosy or dull. The way we color the glasses we wear is the way the world seems to us." --Bishop Fulton J. Sheen "Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation." --Brian Tracy You will get nothing out of life unless you make the decision to go after it. Persistence is the key to winning. --unknown *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation MEMORIES "History is the seed bed of the future." -- Leo Booth I talk about my drinking history, remembering the incidents and losses, because I believe "there is no gain without pain." To enjoy my sobriety I must share, on a daily basis, the reality of my disease. My pain is rooted in my history. I must live with my disease on a daily basis. I need to be aware of the disease process in my life. This awareness requires a "rigorously honest" inventory of my past attitudes and behaviors; ignorance is bliss for the disease of addiction! The acceptance and awareness of my past is my treatment for today. The more I understand about my yesterdays the better my recovery will be today. My life has a history and my spiritual program demands that I understand it. Teach me to face my past so that I can realistically live in my today. ************************************************** ********* "The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him." Lamentations 3:25 "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17 And the Holy Spirit helps us in our distress. For we don't even know what we should pray for, nor how we should pray. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will. Romans 8:26 -27 Fools think they need no advice, but the wise listen to others. A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted. An honest witness tells the truth; a false witness tells lies. Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing. Truth stands the test of time; lies are soon exposed. Deceit fills hearts that are plotting evil; joy fills hearts that are planning peace! Proverbs 12:15-20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration One of life's greatest pleasures is meeting and conquering our most difficult moments. Lord, teach me to trust myself and trust that You will never abandon me or my needs. See opportunity in your difficulties, not difficulty in your opportunities. Lord, I will focus on the goodness today brings to me and look for the many reasons I have to feel joy. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today God's Will "The relief of 'letting go and letting God' helps us develop a life that is worth living." Basic Text pg. 26 In our addiction, we were afraid of what might happen if we didn't control everything around us. Many of us made up elaborate lies to protect our use of drugs. Some of us manipulated everyone around us in a frenzied attempt to get something from them so we could use more drugs. A few of us went to great lengths to keep two people from talking to each other and perhaps discovering our trail of lies. We took pains to maintain an illusion of control over our addiction and our lives. In the process, we kept ourselves from experiencing the serenity that comes with surrender to a Higher Power's will. In our recovery, it is important to release our illusion of control and surrender to a Higher Power, whose will for us is better than anything we can con, manipulate, or devise for ourselves. If we realize that we are trying to control outcomes and are feeling afraid of the future, there is action we can take to reverse that trend. We go to our Second and Third Steps and look at what we have come to believe about a Higher Power. Do we truly believe that this Power can care for us and restore us to sanity? If so, we can live with all of life's ups and downs - its disappointments, its sorrows, its wonders, and its joys. Just for today: I will surrender and let a Higher Power's will happen in my life. I will accept the gift of serenity this surrender brings. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Happiness is not a place to travel to. It's a way of getting there. --Anonymous Those of us who climb mountains find joy in reaching the top. However, the climb would not make much sense if there were not things to enjoy on the way up. If we groan and complain, it will be hard to feel joy at the summit. However, if we are able to enjoy each day's journey, it makes all the difference in the world. In the midst of each chore, we can notice the sunset or the unique and beautiful surroundings of each day. Each of our days is different. Happiness is not a goal we are struggling to reach some time in the future. It is a gift we can give ourselves today. If we enjoy some parts of each day of our hike, we will also feel joy at the summit. What form will my gift of happiness take today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. We shall not cease from exploration. And at the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive where we started And know the place for the first time ---T. S. Eliot Our spiritual path is like a search leading home. We carry within us a yearning for the ideal, the perfect acceptance and love from our fathers and mothers. We long for fulfillment of our dreams, we long to feel strong and capable, and we want to understand, to truly come into our own. As we peel back the layers of our defenses, we find what we knew all along. On a deep level, we knew no man could be totally self-sufficient. Now we are coming back to it as if it's brand new. The best images of our parents' love and acceptance of us are what we return to as models for how we can be. It is true we can never go home again. Yet our spiritual journey mysteriously leads us back to explore what we knew deeply all along. I will make peace with my past and explore the deeper knowledge I've always held within me. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. When you send out real love, real love will return to you. --Florence Scovel Shinn Real love is selfless love. It expects nothing in return. It is not conditional. It doesn't keep score. It is too seldom given. Many of us came into the program hurting, feeling unloved, looking desperately for love, unable to love selflessly. But we are learning. We are climbing the same mountain, all of us. Our particular paths will cross the paths of many others before reaching the top, where we will find full enlightenment. And any path we cross has a special contribution to make to our own progress. We can be grateful for all intersecting paths, no matter how adverse they seem at the time. We can offer all our fellow-travelers real love, and our own trip will benefit manyfold. We need not be ashamed of our desire for love. Nor need we feel shame that we've bargained for it. But we do need to understand that the kind of love we seek can only be gained when we quit searching for it and simply offer it to all the people in our midst. I will look into the hearts of all the people I encounter today and offer them love. I'll receive that which I give. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Healthy Sexuality Many areas of our life need healing. One important part of our life is our sexuality. Our feelings and beliefs about our sexuality, our ability to nurture, cherish, and enjoy our sexuality, our ability to respect ourselves sexually, our ability to let go of sexual shame and confusion, may all be impaired or confused by our codependency. Our sexual energy may be blocked. Or for some of us, sex may be the only way we learned to connect with people. Our sexuality may not be connected to the rest of us; sex may not be connected to love - for others or ourselves. Some of us were sexually abused as children. Some of us may have gotten involved in sexuality addictive behaviors - compulsive sexual behaviors that got out of control and produced shame. Some of us may have gotten involved in sexual codependency: not paying attention to what we wanted, or didn't want, sexually; allowing ourselves to get involved sexually because it was what the other person wanted; shutting off our sexuality along with our other feelings; denying ourselves healthy enjoyment of ourselves as sexual beings. Our sexuality is a part of ourselves that deserves healing attention and energy. It is a part of us that we can allow to become connected to the whole of us; it is a part of us that we can stop being ashamed of. It is okay and healthy to allow our sexual energy to open up and become healed. It is connected to our creativity and to our heart. We do not have to allow our sexual energy to control our relationships or us. We can establish and maintain healthy, appropriate boundaries around our sexuality. We can discover what that means in our life. We can enjoy the gift of being human beings who have been given the gift of sexual energy, without abusing or discounting that gift. Today, I will begin to integrate my sexuality into the rest of my personality. God, help me let go of my fears and shame around my sexuality. Show me the issues I need to face concerning my sexuality. Help me open myself to healing in that area of my life. It feels so good to like myself today. It feels so good to accept myself today. It feels so good to know that I am exactly where I need to be, doing what is right for me in this day. --Ruth Fishel ************************************* Journey to the Heart Open Up to Who You Are Stop criticizing yourself. Stop telling yourself everything you think, feel, want and do is wrong. Or at least not quite right. You’ve been holding back, censoring yourself for too long. Your creativity, your intuition, the voice of your soul is the very voice you’ve been silencing. For many reasons, we learn to criticize and censor ourelves. We may have grown up with people who stifled our inner voice, our wisdom, our knowledge of truth. Our sense of the truth may have caused them to feel uneasy. So they told us to hush. It met their needs to keep us quiet. So we learned to hush ourselves. It was how we survived. No longer do we need to meet other people’s needs, not that way. We don’t have to be afraid of ourselves or what we will find if we look inside. We don’t need to run from ourselves. We don’t need to hide or hush ourselves. We are creative, loving, purposeful beings. It’s time to open up to yourself, to your grandest dreams and aspirations, your real inclinations and desires, your wisdom and knowledge about what is true and what is real. Open up to who you are. Listen to yourself. Express yourself. Enjoy who you are, and you will find others enjoying you,too. ************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Practice the basics Not being codependent? That’s a decision I need to make each day. –Anonymous Remember to practice the basics. There’s a saying floating around that people talk about a lot: Lessons won’t go away until they’re learned. We can move, duck, hide, run, or escape by doing something else, but that lesson will still follow us around. There’s another saying,too, one that’s not talked about as much. But it’s an important lesson to remember as we go through our daily lives: Just because the lesson has been learned doesn’t mean it will go away. Sometimes it appears in different shapes and forms. I used to believe that once a lesson was learned, I had it under my belt. The pain from that lesson would stop once I realized what it was. Then I could just go on with my life and put that graduation certificate in a drawer. It took me a while to realize that that wasn’t necessarily true. I was learning these lessons because I would need to use that skill, awakening, value, descipline, or practice as a tool for the rest of my life. If you’ve got some important life lessons under your belt, congratulations. But don’t put that certificate away quite yet. Instead, why don’t you leave it out in plain sight? When I first began skydiving, the first fifty jumps or so were dedicated to basic training. I was learning to save my life. After that, I began to add new skills to my repertoire. I was able to move my body around and have some fun in the air. I began to learn to fly. But each time I get to the door of the plane and get ready to jump, it’s important to remember everything I learned in the beginning– the basics– about how to save my life. Practice the basics every day or as often as you need. Whether you’re in recovery, working at a craft, working on a relationship, or flying a plane, review your basics and remember to apply these principles each day in your life. Spread your wings. Learn to fly. Have a ball with your life. Learn about all the mystery and magic the universe has to offer. See how good you can get. But don’t forget what you learned in the beginning. Remember to save your own life. God, help me remember to practice the basics of self-care every day of my life. ***** Bird Meditation Witnessing Nature through Meditation by Madisyn Taylor When it becomes too cold to be outside with nature, bring her inside through your meditation. When the weather gets colder it can be more difficult to get in touch with the marvel of nature as it exists around us. Finding innovative ways to really connect with nature brings us closer to the wonders that envelop our lives. One way to do this is to perform a meditation with our feathered friends, the bird kingdom. Just by taking a few moments each day to watch the bird activity that goes on in our backyards through our windows can bring a sense of calm and well-being to our lives. Watching and being with the birds that we share our garden space with us allows us to experience greater feelings of relaxation and gratitude for the diversity that is always present around us. Simply watching, without judgment or expectations, heightens our awareness of the beauty of nature. If you watch the birds for a long enough period of time you will begin to feel a great sense of deep joy within you knowing we are all truly divine. Doing this with our family members will in turn introduce a meditative practice that can easily be shared and appreciated by all, as well as create deeper bonds with each other through the joy of experiencing the healing power of nature. Looking through our windows and placing a feeder and bird bath in our gardens to attract the birds is a way to call forth beauty into our lives. As we consciously connect with our outer world—even when the weather inhibits us from physically being in it—we see that the splendor we view outside of our windows is simply a reflection of what lies within us. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day “We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess,” wrote de Tocqueville, “but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects.” We learn in The Program that our defects do have value — to the extent that we use them as the starting point for change and the pathway to better things. Fear can be a stepping stone to prudence, for example, as well as to respect for others. Fear can also help us turn away from hate and toward understanding. In the same way, pride can lead us toward the road of humility. Am I aware of my direction today? Do I care where I’m going? Today I Pray I pray that my Higher Power will show me how to use my defects in a positive way, because nothing — not even fear or selfishness or greed — is all bad. May I trust that every quality that leads me into trouble has a reverse side that can lead me out. Pride, for instance, can’t puff itself up unduly without bursting and demonstrating that it is, in essence, only hot air. May I learn from my weaknesses. Today I Will Remember Good news out of bad. ************************************* One More Day Just pray for a thick skin and a tender heart. – Ruth Graham There are times when we become angry or hurt or disappointed by the words or actions of our friends. When we react in any of these ways, we are focusing on them instead of us. “He hurt my feelings.” we might say, or “She made me angry.” These statement point out the error in our reasoning. No one can “make” us feel a certain way. Our lives are happier and our emotions more even when we realize we are choosing our reactions. “I let myself be angry (or hurt or disappointed).” Knowing this, gives us a choice in how we let others affect us. We can be less sensitive to real or imagined wrongs. Instead, we can use our sensitivity to understand the pain of others. I will be more loving toward my friends by overlooking their flaws and underlining their strengths. ************************************ Food For Thought Turning On Before OA, many of us were in a self-centered rut. We had little enthusiasm for anything except food, and food proved to be a false friend. When we come to OA and admit that we are powerless over food, we can turn on to a Power greater than ourselves. Just as we do not need to understand the complexities of electricity in order to benefit from it, we do not need to understand everything about God in order to receive His power. Taking the Twelve Steps turns us on to a new way of life, motivated by faith in a Higher Power. Turning on to this Power means that we are no longer alone. We do not have to try to run our lives by ourselves. God can and will relieve us of our obsession with food and our obsession with self. He gives us strength and enthusiasm for the living of our daily lives. Through surrender, we become recipients of the Power of the universe. Take away the blindness that prevents us from turning on to Your Power. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Successful Recovery ~ I always remember an epitaph which is in the cemetery at Tombstone, Arizona. It says: 'Here lies Jack Williams. He done his damnedest.' I think that is the greatest epitaph a man can have. Harry S. Truman No matter what their drug of choice, compulsives all have one thing in common. If we don't practice our program, we run the risk of relapsing back into the disease. What separates those who find recovery and those who don't is this: those who don't find recovery slip and fall, and don't get up again. They figure, "I've already relapsed, so why not just continue using my drug of choice? Why not wallow in my disease?" Those who recover are like Jack Williams...they do their damnedest. They continue to read program literature, they continue to do service, they continue to reach out to others and to their Higher Power. The winners in this program don't wallow...they pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and keep on keeping on. One day at a time... . . . I will do my damnedest. I will work my program to the best of my ability, and if I fall, I won't stay down. Jeff ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I admitted for the first time that of myself I was nothing; that without Him I was lost. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. I have not had a drink since. - Pg. 13 - Bill's Story Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun! Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to. Inside My Mind Today, I am grateful to feel alive and to recognize that life is a spiritual journey. All my life circumstances are spiritual challenges, if I choose to look at them that way. Getting free of my own over-attachment to people, places, things and ideas, mistaking them for me, releases my spirit. Once my spirit is released, it can travel and experience the real beauty of life. Life surrounds me; it is inside, outside and everywhere. If I am free and still inside, life is there. If I am not ruminating and filling my mind with unnecessary preoccupations - life is there, spirit is there - waiting to be seen and felt. I allow my mind its freedom. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'Imagine if at every moment we each embraced the world as the gift it is: An apple is a gift; the color pink is a gift; the blue sky is a gift; the scent of honeysuckle is a gift. Hidden in every experience is a gift,' ~Marcia Prager, The Path of Blessing: Experiencing the Energy and Abundance of the Divine What is my gift right now? "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When you feel your worst, try your best. Time for Joy - Book - Quote It feels so good to like myself today. It feels so good to accept myself today. It feels so good to know that I am exactly where I need to be, doing what is right for me in this day. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I spent fifteen years out there looking for my girlfriend. Then I came to the program and got sober, and I went home one day and I found her; She was my wife. And ain't that the story of the alcoholic? I spent all that time looking for something I had all along. - Norm A.
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"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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