Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - December

[bluidkiti]

December 15

Step by Step

Today, I guard against associating the quantity of my sobriety with its quality. If my recovery consists only of not drinking and I have not tended to my emotional and spiritual diseases, I am little more than a dry drunk. Further, I need to understand and appreciate the truth that ours is a day-to-day reprieve and that weeks, months and even years without drinking is no guarantee that I won’t slip or relapse today. Even if my own sobriety dates several 24 Hours, let me understand that I am no more sober than the person whose last drink was 24 Hours ago and, likewise, that person is no less sober than I. But, if my own sobriety is several 24 Hours, let me also accept and respect the responsibility to the program. I may be asked to carry the message to someone who needs and seeks it. To that extent, I owe the program the integrity of my sobriety and pass it on to whoever seeks it. Today, I am sober 24 Hours. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

The door to wisdom is never shut.

~ BENJAMIN FRANKLIN ~

I believe with all my heart and soul that God is doing for me what I could not do for myself to allow me to live free of addiction and do so much more in my life.

When I was a teenager, around age sixteen, I started using nicotine and about the same time quit going to church and praying. I decided I did not believe in the church I was raised in and almost subconsciously threw out believing in God. I gave up God and figured I could live by my own power. This proved to be a huge mistake. I did not realize I could give up the human church and go directly to God.

This mistake cost me dearly with years of chemical addiction, depression, suicidal negativity and wasted years.

I am so grateful that the Twelve Steps, people in recovery, and God brought me back to a spiritual path. I feel the power of my Higher Power and my faith in service and kindness.

Today, I dance to God’s songs of gratitude and joy and living “one day at a time” free of addiction.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERVANTS

A servant who made service seem divine.

~ Longfellow ~

The recognition of the fact that we have servants to make growth possible is one of the first great discoveries that developed when we joined a 12-Step Group. These servants are as genuine as the sense of love that makes us truly sharing and caring people. Without the emotional servants that make possible changes in attitudes, we could never reach a new style in living. These servants are positive and active.

If the first thing we hear when we reach for recovery is “let us love you until you can learn to love yourself,” the second may well be, “honesty begins within your own self.” We recognize a long list or helping hands that join in steering us toward a comfortable recovery. These hands join in helping us find the way toward that wonderful destination.

My servants are the tools I find when I enter my Program. Some of them are called gratitude, perseverance, vigilance, belief, humility, tolerance, and acceptance. I must count the many, many more.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

A problem is a chance for you to do your best.

~ Duke Ellington ~

The nature of life is that we are consistently faced with problems. We don’t directly choose the puzzle that presents itself to us, but we choose how we will respond to it. The puzzles we get and the responses we choose shape the kind of man we become. Some of us are tempted to balk at our circumstances and refuse to deal with them. We get stuck on the idea that it isn’t fair for us to have our particular problem, and we want to quit trying.

Sometimes, facing the fact that we cannot change a problem and accepting it is the highest form of character. Other times, digging deep within ourselves to pull up the best we can muster and facing a difficult challenge turns us into a better man than we knew we could be. The challenge itself is the inspiration that brings out our best.

Today I will accept the problems I face and give them the best I can muster.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

It takes two to tango, and my husband and I tangoed for nearly sixty-three years.

~ Thelma Elliott ~

Spending time with another human being means having plentiful opportunities for compromise and artful negotiation. It also means putting another’s needs and wants before our own on occasion. To fruitfully share even portions of our lives, we must be willing to be available to each other.

We weren’t created to be sole survivors, independent of other people. We have been introduced to many individuals because of the path we are meant to travel together. Our significant other is one of those from our community of travelers. With that person, we have the opportunity to learn new truths and to grow in wisdom about the art of vulnerability and compromise. No doubt, the most profound of our lessons is learning to let go.

The gift of learning how to let go is that we can apply it everywhere once we’ve come to understand its power in our lives. And our dance with others will never be the same.

I will be willing to back away from a tense encounter today. I don’t need my way to be okay.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can change

When I was using I did not like how I felt or how I behaved. I suppose I continued to use because (a) part of me always believed it would be different the next time, (b) it was familiar, and (c) I thought it kept me safe (even though it caused serious problems at the same time). When I got into dual recovery, I just wanted relief from my psychiatric symptoms, my emotional pain. I wasn’t looking to become a “better” person.

And yet through recovery meetings, therapy (and short-term medication), not only do I feel relief, but I am growing and developing as a person. I feel it especially as I work Step Seven and ask that my shortcomings be removed. I am open to change. I don’t know how I’ll change through this Step, but I trust my higher power that all will be well.

I will write out the Seventh Step Prayer (p. 76 in the Big Book) and carry it with me.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.

~ Albert Einstein ~

We’ve been hurt more than once in our lives. And more than once we’ve wondered, “Why me?” We may also have wondered why a person we trusted could hurt us so, or why someone else behaves the way they do. We may wonder when it will all stop and we won’t be hurt, puzzled, or caught unawares any more.

Only God knows the answers to those questions. And we can choose to let God take care of us while we embrace the mystery of our lives. It’s enough of a task just to live each day to the fullest without also trying to figure out things we’re not able to know.

In many ways, we are lucky. We’re alive, we aren’t starving. We’ve found a recovery program to help us rebuild our lives, and we have survived the trials of life so far. What more could we ask?

Now our task is to enjoy, to grow more fully human, to explore the mysterious; not to take it apart and know it, but to enjoy God’s work.

Today let me accept what I don’t understand.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Belly and the Members

One day it occurred to many members of the body that they were doing all the work and the belly was having all the food. So the members decided to go on strike until the belly agreed to share in the work.

But after a week had passed, the other members began to feel strange. They discovered they could not perform any of the work they had previously done. The hands could hardly move. The mouth was parched and dry. The eyelids began to droop. The mind felt jumbled. And the legs found themselves unable to support the rest of the members.

What they discovered is that the belly had been working all along. Even though its work was done quietly, what it accomplished was of benefit to all of the body’s members. Without it, none would be able to function.

The moral of the story: All must work together.

If each member in recovery decided to focus solely on individual needs and desires, there would be no unity, no support, and no outreach. The fellowship is one based on unity, made whole by its many members.

I honor and support the work of others, as they honor and sup-port the work that I do.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When you pray for God’s guidance, don’t complain when it is different from your preference.

~ Our Daily Bread ~

When we were children we sat on Santa’s lap with our lists, or asked the tooth fairy for more money, or begged the Easter Bunny for more candy, or prayed to God for that shiny red bike we wanted. Yet we usually ended up with things we didn’t even ask for, but needed, like warm jackets and winter boots or pajamas.

Today we may still pray to God for things we want. Maybe not shiny red bikes, but shiny new cars, more money, better jobs, greater security, or the health of loved ones. Our prayers might not be answered in the way we’d like them to be. We may never win a lottery, we may lose a promotion, or we may experience the death of a loved one.

Yet what we are given is what God feels we need. Though we may be sad or disappointed, those things help us grow in the way we need. Sometimes we may get just what we pray for, and that’s wonderful. But if we don’t get what we ask for, we must remember that what we get is the gift God feels we need. 

I can pray for guidance without any expectations. I know I will get what I need.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Gaining understanding

Most of us have things happen in our lives that we don’t understand. Many things we’ll probably never understand and may not need to understand.

We have the most to gain by trying to understand recurring negativity. We can get insight from the fellowship, from the Steps, and from our sponsors. The cycle can be broken if we unmask old ideas and habits that initiate the recurrent misfortunes. When we understand the problem, we overcome it by seeking the seed of opportunity within.

How well do I understand myself?

Higher Power, help me to give up ideas and habits that lead me down my old path time and time again.

Today I will look at the problems and negativity in my life and seek to understand them by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

We say: made with joy. We should say: wise with grief.

~ MARGUERITE YOURCENAR ~

Newcomer

I’ve seen some movies lately that weren’t very good, but that had a powerful impact on me anyway. One, a horror movie, really scared me, and one was a sentimental movie that made me cry. Neither film was even very believable, but I got emotionally involved. What’s happening to me?

Sponsor

First, let me reassure you that your mind is working as well as, or better than, ever. When we’re not dulling or depressing ourselves with addictive substances and behaviors, our thinking becomes clearer and sharper.

However, we may also find ourselves more responsive to emotional stimuli in recovery than before. An event that seems to have nothing to do with us—a film, a news item, another person’s triumph or tragedy—triggers tears, laughter, or feelings of fear or anger. Often, this triggering event is not the true source of our feelings. The tears we shed in response to a scene in a film may be releasing some of our old, accumulated sadness. It’s nearer the surface, easier to tap into, when we’re ready to begin letting it go.

Our feelings are freer to flow, now that they’re not blocked by addiction. Emotional release is necessary and natural.

Today, I am in touch with my feelings and unafraid to express them.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Faith is a fundamental requisite of success in retaining our sobriety — faith in God, faith in the Program, and faith in ourselves.

It can be likened to swimming: Every normal person can swim, if he has faith in the laws of buoyancy and allows himself to be submerged enough. Those people who cannot swim are those who are afraid of the water and try to raise themselves above it.

Faith in the laws of Nature and in yourself enables you to swim, and a like faith in God, the Program and yourself, will enable you to achieve our way of living.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Drink(ing,): Every alcoholic’s favorite brand: More!

2) Heal(ing): God will heal your broken heart, if you will give Him all the pieces.

3) Opinion(s): The character of God is not determined by your opinion of Him/Her.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Procrastination

Higher Power, it was so easy to put things off during my addiction. I pray to remember that postponing facing up to reality is really self-pity in action. When I procrastinate about solving problems, I am only making the problems worse. Let me remember that solutions come from taking action. I pray to stop wasting precious time.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOU CANNOT HAVE BOTH

You cannot have your cake, and eat it too.

You cannot have peace of mind, and have your ailment too.

You cannot have a sense of divine Love, and have your jittery nervousness too.

You cannot have a feeling of toleration and kindliness and faith, and have your digestive troubles too.

You cannot have harmony continually unfolding in your life, and enjoy gossip and criticism too.

You cannot have power in prayer, and the luxury of resentment and condemnation too.

You cannot build a new consciousness and a new body, and live mentally in the dead past too.

…choose you this day whom ye will serve…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord (Joshua 24:15).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

I Forgot

The past is over; it can touch me not.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

An old and sour priest in the Philippines heard of a woman who was reputed to speak to Jesus daily. In an effort to discredit Rosa, he asked her, “Do you really speak to Jesus?”

“I do,” she answered in a matter-of-fact way.

“Then the next time you talk to him, would you ask him what was the sin that I committed when I was a young man in the seminary—”

”Come back in one week, and I will have your answer,” Rosa told him. The priest left smugly, knowing that Rosa would be unable to answer and be exposed as a fraud.

A week later the priest returned and asked her, “Did you talk to Jesus?”

“I did.”

“And did you ask him how I sinned in the seminary?”

“I did.”

“And what did he tell you?”

“He said, ‘I forgot.’”

Real forgiveness is the complete and utter letting go of past memories that hurt. What the world calls forgiveness is a trick of the mind. We make “sin” real in our mind, and then proclaim to overlook it. But any memory of the act as an offense ensures continued subconscious pain and separation. We bury the hatchet, but then we remember where we buried it.

I know a couple who have been happily married for many years. I asked them, “What is the secret of your successful relationship?” The wife laughed and answered, “Just get over it! We can’t afford to hold on to the past. We just keep letting go and coming fully into the present moment with each other.”

We are told to “forgive and forget.” They are one in the same.

Help me to release the pain I have carried, and to live in the present moment where love abides.

I renounce the past and come fully into the love here now.

[bluidkiti]

December 16

Step by Step

Today, I will not empower anyone so strongly that their perception or opinion about me determines my sense of self-worth and security in myself and, especially, the quality of my recovery. In recovery, I can’t believe my purpose is to be everything to everyone or to meet the standards they set down. The reason for recovery is to stop drinking or using and atone for any injury and hurt I might have imposed in my drinking days. In some cases, amends may not possible nor can I control if my amends will be accepted. If I find someone is unduly harsh or critical of what I am in recovery, I can first ask if the criticism is warranted and whether I should work harder on a character defect. But if I find that the criticism is not justified, I can either take it with a grain of salt or ask if the person being unduly judgmental is someone I need even care about. If I can say honestly that my program has made me a better person and I am continuing to work the steps toward being a better person, I can believe I am at a secure place in recovery. Today, my self-confidence will be based on an honest look at where I am in recovery, not on what someone thinks. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.,

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Even if one glimpses God, there are still cuts and splinters and burns— No wall or avoidance or denial can keep the rawness of life from running through us.

~ MARK NEPO ~

There are some days when the best I can do is make it through the day without using nicotine. There are days when after eight years of recovery I feel so raw and burned I feel like nothing is worth anything. Then by the grace of God I bounce back and feel grateful and healed and ready to go.

I am grateful those bad days are short-lived. In the addiction period of my life those dark clouds would cover me for weeks or months or years, with suicidal storms passing through. Since recovery and practicing the Twelve Steps I have a daily reprieve from the worst of it.

But I still get those days. Sharing with my home groups in recovery, my sponsor, and God helps pull me out of the negativity which seems so familiar to me. 1 am reminded that the rawness of life runs through me at times and that is OK, to be accepted and embraced as the way life is for me. Was I trying to run away from life’s fullness when I was using nicotine?

Today, I am grateful to live free of addiction, truly experiencing all of life and enjoying the adventure.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

DON’T JUDGE

Don’t judge anyone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

~ Anonymous ~

God did not make different classes of human beings. It has taken mankind several thousand years to understand this fact. Even now, the understanding is not always practiced. We learn in our recovery that we are all equal in our ability to be human.

Recovery from our disease does not free us from being human. It gives us a way of life to deal with this fact. For there to be serenity and peace in our lives, we have to learn to accept our humanness.

If people act as we think they shouldn’t, then we have to change the way we think. It is just that simple. The acceptance we seek goes beyond things and events. The Serenity Prayer also refers to people as well as things. We are really asking our Higher Power to accept people as they are. We can’t change them.

Today, I’ll remember to live and let live. This removes me from the position of judging others.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

You must do the thing you cannot do.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

We are faced with what we cannot do. We are up against a stone wall. A fundamental wisdom about adulthood is that we have not grown up until we grasp our powerlessness and accept its lessons. Easy answers from the immature and inexperienced tell us to buck up, never give in, and do it alone. Every adult faces this wall in his life, whether he is an addict or codependent or not. If he hasn’t faced it or doesn’t accept it, he has not yet truly grown into manhood.

When we have tried every tactic and every control maneuver to manage what we cannot change, there is another option. We can accept that we are powerless to change the stone wall. This acceptance feels like defeat at first. But it also makes us wiser and leads to deeper insight about life. In the Twelve Step program, surrender is only the first Step to a new beginning. We are next led to a spiritual connection that makes the impossible possible. Out of the collapse of our old ways can rise a new way of life—and a new man.

Today I am grateful that I was guided out of despair into new possibilities.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

It is how much love we put in the doing that makes our offering something beautiful.

~ Mother Teresa ~

Mother Teresa’s words aren’t new to most of us. Program sponsors often suggest this idea to us too. What we give comes back to us.

We often note people who excel on the job, in a sport, at a creative pursuit. We may envy them and think we should excel at everything we try. Why are we so lacking in talent? we wonder.

We have not been shortchanged. The truth is, we may not have learned to concentrate our attention so fully on an activity that we come to love the experience simply for the sake of the experience. Those who excel are not easily distracted by others’ actions or their own ongoing inner dialogues or fear of failure. Their intense focus and love for what they are doing allows their talent to be realized.

When we’re putting love into our actions, we, too, will discover our own excellence.

It’s not what I do but how I do it that counts. Being in love with my life today is a choice I can make.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am gaining some perspective

I was feeling angry and sad, so I got together with some friends. I thought that simply being with other people would help. But I still felt empty and distant. To top it off, I started feeling sorry for myself because I didn’t get what I wanted or expected. And then I felt guilty because I wasn’t much fun to be around.

But after meditating for a while, I saw my emotions in a different light and I realized three things: (a) Because my friends were willing to get together with me, I know they accept and support me. (This idea feels good.) (b) Maybe I can’t “fix” my moods; maybe I need to accept them for a while. (I don’t like this notion, but it helps to be realistic.) (c) Even though my expectations were not met, I learned something. My attitude is changing for the better. *

The next time I feel bad about something I’ve done (or not done), I will take a time-out to meditate and improve my perspective and self-understanding.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Every moment that I am centered in the future, I suffer a temporary loss of this life.

~ Hugh Prather ~

For the most part we find that leaving the pre-sent moment for some future projection leads to frustration. We need to make necessary plans for future events, but idly pondering life’s outcomes often converts our present into negative experiences. We lose a piece of today in the process. And we risk sabotaging our recovery by igniting fear and anxiety.

Old habits can be attractive. We used to feel comfortable worrying about the future, or fantasizing about it. This was our escape from an unhappy present, and it ensured that the present remained unhappy. Now we are facing life in the present, and, for the sake of our recovery, we can’t afford to abandon this moment.

When we remember that this one day is really all we have, live it with a sense of trust, and give it our full attention, we are living our lives to the fullest. This is the ever-present gift of recovery that is ours every day.

Today let me live my only moment — the present.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Rest is not a matter of doing absolutely nothing. Rest is repair.

~ Daniel W. Josselyn ~

The phrase “positive addiction” refers to those activities that have positive benefits to their pursuit: a hobby, following the game schedule of a favorite sports team, exercise, and volunteer work. But as you know from your own addiction, too much of anything can be harmful.

Whenever your focus and energy are committed to things in ways that cause you to neglect the people and responsibilities in your life, everyone suffers. Even being obsessive about the number of meetings you attend in a week or being overly committed to serving the fellowship can put the people in your life and your personal and professional responsibilities on a back burner.

Today think about how much time you spend in activities and pursuits you enjoy, and how much time you spend taking care of your responsibilities. Are they in balance?

Too, develop greater awareness of all of your physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. For example, pay attention to how your body feels. There will be days in which you feel energized and vigorously engage in exercise or activity. There will also be days in which you need to still your body so your muscles and your mind can be rested.

I will pay attention to my mind, body, and spirit. Each day I will seek to create a healthy balance between activity and rest.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Some days confidence shrinks to the size of a pea, and the backbone feels like a feather. We want to be somewhere else, and don’t know where—want to be someone else and don’t know who.

~ Jean Hersey ~

Who are we? Where are we going? What do we like? Are we happy? What do we want from life?

These certainly are not easy questions to answer. In fact, we may have been struggling with the answers for a long time. We, who thought we knew ourselves so well, are now finding we aren’t who we believed we were. We are so much more, but we may not be able to put our finger on the so much more.

I am just starting to discover who I am. I may not have all the answers tonight, but I know so much more than I did before.

We may never get to answer all the questions. For some of us, the answers may change on a daily or even hourly basis. We are just starting to learn who we are without the definitions of people, alcohol or other drugs, or any other addiction. The process of finding out who we are takes time and patience and a whole lot of change from the way we used to be. The answers, like the questions, will come to us when we’re ready.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Honesty

We have to learn to be rigorously honest with ourselves. If we can’t be honest with ourselves, we can’t be honest with others, we can’t be honest with our Higher Power, and we can’t expect to change.

If we call a cab to one address, and we are, in fact, at another, we can’t expect the driver to find us much less pick us up. So it is with our Higher Power. If we ask to be healed of something but mistake our malady for another, we can’t expect the change we’d hoped for.

We have to begin listening to how we re-ally feel. Most of us have very tricky heads but very honest guts!

Do I acknowledge my gut-level honesty?

Higher Power, help me to know where I’m really at and to accept it.

Today I will explore my gut reactions to things by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

there is nothing between me and my soul but myself.

~ JANE MEAD ~

Newcomer

Certain situations in my life are putting a lot of pressure on me. I’m lonely and frustrated. I don’t want to act out my addiction today, and I don’t want to be preached to.

Sponsor

There are times when recovery seems to be the only thing we can rely on. Nothing seems to be going our way. No one seems to understand. We feel as if we’ve already heard it all, and well-intentioned advice only makes us feel more alone with whatever is troubling us. We feel self-protective, perhaps somewhat defiant, as we declare in meetings that we don’t want any help today. Our declaration, though it’s intended to ward people off, is also a way of letting others in recovery know what we’re going through; it is evidence of a certain degree of trust in ourselves and others.

Recovery, at such times, doesn’t seem to be the source of happiness, joy, and freedom that we’ve felt it to be. Still, recovery has become so deeply ingrained in us by now that it almost feels as if it is us. We know that returning to active addiction won’t make whatever it is we’re feeling disappear. Some part of us knows that the deep discomfort we’re feeling today will prove to be temporary, if we stay in recovery.

Today, I acknowledge the transformation in my life that has eliminated active addiction as an option. No matter what happens, no matter what I’m feeling, I can count on my commitment to recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Every alcoholic has at one time or another had such a load of troubles that there was surely no prospect of his ever being happy again.

On the other hand, there were moments of ectasy that were so great that our lives seemed completely filled and no cloud could ever possibly enter our lives again.

Both conditions existed only a brief while, until another mood appeared. Both, to a great extent, are products of our state of mind. Unhappiness can be guarded against and happiness can be cultivated.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Simple: An alcoholic is an individual who takes the most simple program and works on It until he has eventually reduced it to its most complicated form.

2) Working with Others: Carry the message, don’t carry the drunk; however, if necessary, carry the drunk to the message.

3) STANDARD ACRONYMS: YANA: You Are Not Alone

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

A Peaceful Pace

Today, God, help me focus on a peaceful pace rather than a harried one. I will keep moving forward gently, not frantically. Help me let go of my need to be anxious, upset, and harried. Help me replace it with a need to be at peace and in harmony.

~ From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie, page 90 ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

MAKE IT WORK

Buy thy truth, and sell it not; also wisdom and instruction, and understanding (Proverbs 23:23).

All you have of Truth is what you understand of it—and what you understand you always demonstrate. It naturally follows from this that the only way to improve yourself and your conditions is to gain an increase in understanding. And the only way to gain an increase in understanding is to make practical use of the Truth you already know. Knowledge that you do not actually use is only intellectual knowledge and is barren, and even that fades out in time through lack of use.

You will never demonstrate or progress on mere theories that you have not put to the test. You will never demonstrate or grow spiritually on what is in a textbook or a lecture until you have begun to put such knowledge into practice. It is far better to have a thimbleful of spiritual knowledge and use it than to have a whole mountain of correct spiritual doctrine most of which you have never made work.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Beyond Coincidence

A coincidence is a miracle in which God wishes to remain anonymous.

~ Dr. Gerald Jampolsky ~

“You may have noticed that the airplane didn’t land,” the pilot announced to the passengers. Of course they did. The plane came within a few feet of touching down on the Chicago runway and lifted off again. “That is because another plane was on the runway and there wasn’t room for both of us.” Good thinking. “We’ll circle around and land again in a few minutes.” During that time, my friend Charley struck up a conversation with the couple sitting across the aisle. When John and Bari mentioned that they had just bought land in Hawaii, Charley told them that he and I were about to conduct a seminar there. Charley told them about my book and wished them well. At home in Boulder, John and Bari found my book, signed up for the seminar, discovered they had just enough frequent-flyer miles to make the trip, attended the program, had their lives change immensely, and moved to their property two miles from my home.

How marvelously Spirit orchestrates life! Who put Charley, John, and Bari next to each other on the aircraft? Why did that particular airplane have to abort its landing? How did their frequent-flyer award work out perfectly? How does it all come together? Ah, the sweet mystery of God! If anyone sat down to try to maneuver the miraculous meetings and events in a lifetime, he or she would be boggled in an instant. Meanwhile, every day a billion synchronicities keep the great cogs and wheels of the universe running flawlessly.

Great Spirit, I bow before the mystery of Your wisdom. I quit trying to manipulate life, and trust You to keep me in my right place at the right time, meeting the right people for the right purpose. Thank You for Your exquisite love.

I rejoice in the loving wisdom of God in my life.

[bluidkiti]

December 17

Step by Step

Today: A conscious decision not to say anything negative to or about anyone or any situation in my life. Instead, I will let only the positive in and, if I cannot find anything good to say or do, I will say or do nothing. Despite any problems in my life or their enormity, I have literally everything if I am sober, and I have a start if I haven’t drunk in the last 24 Hours. And I still have hope if I am drinking but have been tossed the lifeline of AA. Without sobriety or even the hope for it, other problems in my life will likely worsen simply because I’m either too drunk to deal with them or I’m trying to avoid them. And as for those other problems in my life, instead of complaining, I will deal with them as best I can and know that I have given my best. I might also learn that the positive is a much more serene place than the negative. Today, I have no time or need for the negative. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one’s weakness … it is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.

~ MOHANDAS GHANDI ~

My most sincere and heartfelt prayer is, “Thank you God.” It is gratitude.

Yes, I pray with many words and express desires, fears and feelings other than gratitude. Those prayers share the theme of “please help me.” They are genuinely felt prayers, admissions of my weakness, and I believe they are heard by God. But nowhere do I feel that sense of sincerity other than in praying, “Thank you God for this life to share with You here in this moment.”

Prayer and meditation are so solidly recommended by the Twelve Steps. They are my bridges to know God. I cannot thus far in my recovery let go of the more selfish prayers but in meditation I reach out to God for anything that comes.

Today, I will add prayers of gratitude to any cries for help.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

MEETINGS

It takes the good and bad meeting—the good and bad speaker — to make the Program work

~ Anonymous ~

We are told that every meeting we at-tend will be a good meeting. Our sponsor will tell us that there are no bad meetings; all meetings are good, some are just better than others. Newcomers are asked not to even consider whether the meetings are good or bad. “Just bring your body and the mind will follow,” and “take what you need and leave the rest.”

Even when we think we didn’t get much out of a meeting, we will find that many others who were there benefited a great deal. We may remember something we heard at a “baa” meeting more often than what we heard at a “good” meeting. The old-timers tell us, “The most important part of any meeting, for you, is the moment you walk through the door into it. It’s not so much what you do there, it’s the fact that you are there.”

Today I’ll remember some meetings may be better than others, but it’s more important that I’m there.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Until you are willing to let go of your parents, you continue to conceive of yourself as a child.

~ Frederick Peris ~

Emancipation is a lot more than living away from our parents and supporting ourselves. Many things can still hold us within the limitations of childhood. Some of us haven’t shaken the criticisms we heard as children. Some of still turn to indulgent parents who pick up the pieces and don’t expect us to stand on our own two feet. Some of us hold onto resentments about our parents. These things imprison us within our expired childhood.

By its nature, emancipation cannot be handed to us. It is only won by taking it—by our own maturity. Letting go of our parents means we choose to be grown up and independent. We tear up the I.O.U. and go forward into manhood. After letting our parents go, we can have adult relationships with them and enjoy them for who they are.

Today I am letting go of my parents so that I can live in the present as an adult man.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

When I remember to listen and savor another’s experience as valuable and sacred, I touch a sense of mystery.

~ Rita Casey ~

As much as we may want to deny it, few of us are truly attentive listeners. We try to listen. We even work hard to keep our own obsessive thoughts quiet. But turning our entire attention to a friend in need is a trait we may never perfect. Even so, listening is a worthy pursuit, because very frequently God’s wisdom comes to us through another person’s words.

Our intimate moments with another soul are never accidental or inconsequential. We are like dancers in a ballet. Each of our movements has its complement in another’s movement. We have been drawn together to complete the story for one another. And it’s imperative to hear another’s words if we are to fulfill our very special role. We can know God’s will if we listen closely to the words of others.

We should remember that God is present always in our friends with the message our souls await.

Dear God, help me listen today to your message as it is expressed through my friends.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to succeed

I’ve tried to stop using alcohol and drugs many times on my own, and I’ve tried many ways. Here I am again, looking at yet another way, the Twelve Step fellowship. Sometimes I wonder, what’s the use? Why should I believe that this will work any better than the others?

Yet from what I’ve learned about the Steps in talking with my therapist about my using and recovery, I feel more open and willing. I’ve learned that: (a) The Twelve Step program is considered especially helpful for people with addiction. (b) At dual recovery meetings, for example, I would be with people who experience and understand my addiction and mental health problems, (c) At meetings, there’s no requirement (except to listen) and I will not be judged, (d) Since I’m tired of going it alone and failing, I might as well give the fellowship a try.

I will make a commitment to attend six Twelve Step meetings and give the program a chance to work for me.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The sweetest of all sounds is praise.

~ Xenophon ~

When we were little and had just learned a new skill such as tumbling head-over-heels in the grass, the first thing we wanted was for Mom or Dad to watch us do it. “Look at me… look what I can do,” we said. If we were lucky, our parents praised us, and we soaked it up and felt grand.

As small children, we knew we needed praise and we weren’t shy in seeking it. Sadly, as adults we often pretend we don’t need any praise, or else we feel we don’t deserve it. And even if we did deserve it, it wouldn’t be “proper” to ask.

But today we are learning that we do indeed deserve it, and it’s okay to want and seek recognition. If we can’t yet ask for it anywhere else, we can always find it in our fellowship. Soon, as we learn to ask for and accept praise, we also learn to praise ourselves and to value our own opinion as much as we do others’.

Today help me believe I deserve praise and give me the courage to ask for it.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

One should eat to live, not live to eat.

~ Moliere ~

The stress of the holidays, combined with holiday gatherings offering delicious treats, can tempt you to over-indulge. When you consume too many sweets or junk food, your overall health can be affected.

You can satisfy your nutritional needs and boost your energy by planning meals that include a bright array of colorful fruits and vegetables. Depending on their color, fruits and vegetables offer a range of beneficial effects.

Green foods such as green beans, grapes, and dark leafy lettuces have antioxidants, promote vision, and reduce the risk of cancer. Orange and deep yellow produce such as carrots, peppers, and butternut squash strengthen the immune system and promote vision. Purple and blue foods such as eggplant, blackberries, and blueberries contain antioxidants, improve memory, and enhance urinary tract health. Red foods such as cranberries, strawberries, and red peppers offer heart-healthy benefits and may reduce some cancer risks.

If you cannot find fresh fruits, substitute frozen fruits and use as a topping for oatmeal or in a smoothie. Eat a balanced meal before you go to a gathering and then limit your intake of sweets and empty calories as you socialize.

I will pay attention to my nutritional needs to enhance my health and wellness.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We crucify ourselves between two thieves: regret for yesterday and fear of tomorrow.

~ Fulton Oursler ~

Some women who had been victims of violence banded together to “take back the night” in a series of public demonstrations. Rather than hold regret over the violence or their fear of what might happen, they chose to live in the moment with no fear or regrets.

Tonight we can “take back the night” from our own fears. This can mean easing our minds from the stress of the day so we can have a peaceful sleep. It can mean letting go of any fearful thoughts so we’re at peace in our homes. It can mean blocking out crazy thoughts that will make us toss and turn.

This night is ours. It’s our time for uninterrupted sleep, pleasant dreams, and gentle rest for our weary bodies.

Tomorrow will be waiting for me, after I’ve taken back the night to feel peace, trust, and serenity. 

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Remembering

We are survivors! We lived long enough to let our Higher Power save our lives. We managed not to OD or die of cirrhosis, in a car accident, in jail, or by a bullet. We somehow avoided meeting these and countless other horrible ends associated with our disease.

By the grace of our Higher Power, we may never have to live in that world again. If we forget where we came from, let us visit the detox units of our local hospitals. We will be reminded by observing addicts with DTs, brain damage, and many other injuries resulting from the abuse of mind-altering chemicals.

Do I remember where I came from?

Higher Power, let me never forget where I came from and where I will return to if I fail to live by your principles.

Today I will recall the past by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

You do not notice changes in what is always before you.

~ COLETTE ~

Newcomer

My schedule has changed, and now I’m rarely able to go to the meetings where I got sober. It’s been a hard adjustment for me; I’m still not used to it. I know that it’s the same fellowship wherever we go, but nothing really feels the same to me as it did in early recovery.

Sponsor

When we make a major change in our lives, we sometimes feel as if we’re required to give up everything associated with the past, but there are ways of preserving connections we value. While you are reaching out to new friends, you may want to keep making phone calls to stay in touch with people who’ve been important in your early recovery.

Even if we can continue going to the meetings we went to in early recovery, things won’t always feel the same. Everything changes. As we and those around us grow, we experience meetings differently. We will also face different challenges; the problems we entered recovery with are not likely to be the ones that concern us a year later. Our lives in recovery are full of change, and far more often than in our past, the changes we experience are positive. The less we fight the necessity for change, the more easily we’ll go through it.

Today, I accept change as necessary and focus on its benefits. I celebrate the ways I’ve changed in recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The world is a looking glass; it returns to you what you give to it. All the world and everything in it are but reflections of yourself, and if the world doesn’t look good to you, rest assured, you don’t look good to the world.

The words of every person you meet are but an echo of your own, and wherever you go the world will be the same unless you, yourself, change.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Al-Anon: Keep your eyes on yourself.

2) Drink(ing,): Every drink you drank got you here. Every drink you don’t drink keeps you here.

3) Heal(ing): If you’re paining…you’re gaining; if you’re feeling…you’re healing.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Fear

Dear God, fear used to be my worst enemy when I was locked up in my addiction. It prevented me from living fully. It kept me standing still. I now see how fear kept me a prisoner of my addiction and character defects. I will share my fears with You and others in the Program. I pray to work to get past my fears.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

—AND MEAN IT

Think of God. Review some of the things that you know to be true about Him—His perfect goodness, infinite intelligence, all presence, limitless power, unbound love, and so forth. Claim that God who is all those things, is with you—and believe it.

Read a few verses of Scripture or any spiritual book that helps you.

Say silently that you forgive everyone who may seem to need it; without exception or mental reservation—and mean it.

Ask God to forgive you for all mistakes you have ever made; and say you accept His forgiveness—and mean it.

Claim that God is now inspiring you, teaching you, and healing you. Claim that He is giving you the greatest of all gifts—HIMSELF—because, having Him, you will have everything else too.

Give thanks in advance for the peace of mind, the harmony, and the spiritual growth that is yours—and mean it.

Offer unto God thanksgiving; and pay thy vows unto the most High (Psalm 50:14).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Look in My Eyes

The countenance is the portrait of the soul, and the eyes mark its intentions.

~ Cicero ~

While traveling in the West, Cheeah found a community and friends with whom she resonated deeply. After meditating on this feeling, she recognized that she was being guided by Spirit to move there and begin a new life. When Cheeah told her parents, friends, and business clients about her decision, many challenged her. Some told her she was crazy. Rather than argue with her critics, Cheeah simply told them, “Look in my eyes.”

The eyes never lie; they are indeed the windows of our soul. Your eyes speak for you in ways that words cannot. People who do not love or believe in themselves have a hard time looking others in the eye because they are afraid to look themselves in the eye. They fear that if they looked upon themselves directly, they would find an ugly, evil, or punishable person. This is not so. If you look at yourself or another long enough, you will pierce through the outer veils of fear and scattered thoughts and arrive at the jewel of the inner being.

Practice connecting with the eyes of others. You do not have to engage in a weighty staring contest; simply give others your full attention and eye contact. In this way, you will invite them to do the same, and your communication will deepen immensely.

We keep enemies by not looking at them, and we make friends by showing others who we are. Let your eyes reveal the riches of your soul.

Help me to see myself clearly and to be unafraid to show others who I really am.

I see clearly through the eyes of God, which are my own.

[bluidkiti]

December 18

Step by Step

Today, if the holiday season is difficult or painful for alcoholics, I choose not to focus on the losses or reasons that make the season less than what it was in the past. I will not languish in the pain or mourn the losses of people who might once have been part of happier holidays, nor will I obsess in my guilt if my behavior contributed to this season not being what it could be. Instead, I will seek out examples of other people in greater need and want than I. If for no other reason than to force my attention off myself, I will volunteer for active work with a social service agency that helps people in need especially at this time of year, or to another cause that serves a cause other than my own. May I understand that my own pain, regret or losses is probably less than someone else’s, and I need to be grateful that mine are no greater. Today, I choose to seek a reason to celebrate and reject pain and sorrow. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Like life itself, the Steps are a process and a cycle.

~ NICOTINE ANONYMOUS: THE BOOK ~

A friend in recovery likes to describe the Steps as a circle that goes round and round, and can go either way depending on what is needed. I see so much progress at times in my life, and so much frustration at other times, even after many years of recovery.

I like the hammer; it works pretty well, but it can sure cause a lot of damage if used the wrong way. So what are the tools of the Program?

Having a sponsor and trusted friends in recovery 1 can be really honest with and not fear they will use my truth against me. This is so important, having a group or more than one group where I can reveal what is truly going on with me.

Not trying to use my group as a hunting ground for sexual or business purposes is very important for me, no matter how tempting that is at times.

Having a close, intimate, genuine relationship with a Higher Power I call God is so important in my recovery.

Trying to live life the way I believe God wants me to live and trying to promptly correct the wrongs I do.

Relying on and trusting that God has my best interests in mind, even though I do not know what that entails.

I can reach out to other people in recovery and share my “experience, strength and hope.” I volunteer to be of service, and reach out to new people with their inevitable struggles and lack of understanding. I practice recovery principles with everyone, including myself.

Today, I am grateful for the many tools and practices of our Program.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

PAST MISTAKES

If you turn it over and don’t let go of it, you’ll be upside down.

~ Anonymous ~

A lot of unhappiness comes from dwelling on past mistakes and failures. Our Higher Power can do many things for us: remove a lifelong compulsion to drink, to drug, to overeat, to gamble; remove all kinds of character defects such as lying, cheating, stealing, adultery. God can determine many things, but our Higher Power cannot force us to accept our past. If we choose to walk around with shame and guilt about the past, that’s our choice.

It has been the collective wisdom of our Fellowship that many people have relapsed because they couldn’t let go and accept their past mistakes. We all, each one of us, were born imperfect. It is not surprising that this imperfection, along with our addiction, has caused us trouble along the way.

I learn how to live with my past mistakes by practicing and using the tools of my Program.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow,

~ Chinese proverb ~

Anger is a life force. It gives us energy and motivation. Like so many other things, it is not inherently good or evil. The key for us, as developing men, is how we use our anger.

We can all recall times when we felt the power of anger but handled our feelings badly. We popped off impulsively and were filled with regret. Or maybe we couldn’t admit our mistake and went to extremes to justify our bad behavior. Some of us have been so frightened by our own anger or someone else’s that now we avoid it at all costs.

As adult men we develop good ways to manage this power. We start by getting acquainted with anger so that we know it when it shows up. We aren’t ruled by it and we aren’t afraid to feel anger. This Chinese proverb doesn’t say to hide from anger. It says to begin with patience. Then we can form an effective way to handle anger so that we won’t have regrets.

Today I will accept my feeling of anger when they arise, and I will express them in constructive ways.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The events in our lives happen in a sequence in time, but in their significance to ourselves they find their own order.

~ Eudora Welty ~

Recalling the distant past, or even last week, helps us realize how little we remember of the very events that compose our lives. We may vividly remember the slights we felt from others, the defeats, and the embarrassments, but the millions of ordinary details have vanished. Have they not a place in our histories too?

Getting a more balanced perspective on who we have been and who we are becoming is one of the rewards of this program. As we discover who we are in greater detail, we become more aware of the quiet moments in our lives. Events that seemed of little significance before can now enlighten us. Our personal and family histories have a part in who we struggle to become. Let’s honor all of them.

What may seem significant to me today may be less important in the years ahead. I’ll not pass judgment, but honor all of it as uniquely my own.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am sick and I need help

I remember when I finally hit bottom. As hard as I tried, I couldn’t seem to stay clean and sober. Nor could I ward off my sadness any longer—even by using. I felt like I was losing ground. My strength was low.

Odd as it sounds, even then, I sensed this wasn’t all bad. I was exhausted from struggling and losing; I had done all I could. I felt I was finally willing to give up (in a way)—especially my pride—and accept that I couldn’t do this on my own.

I will continue to ask friends or doctors or counselors for the help I know I need.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We are suspicious of grace.
We are afraid of the very lavishness of the gift.
But a child rejoices in presents!

~ Madeleine L’Engle ~

If we can read these words, grace has touched us. By the grace of God or nature or luck, we have been given the gift of literacy. If we can hold this book, we’ve been graced with hands that can create, caress, and carry. If we see these words, we have eyes that show us the world. If we’re reading at home or in a hospital or on a train, we are graced with a place to rest and live and be well.

Some of us ask, “Why did I have to get the disease of addiction?” yet forget to ask, “Why am I alive when other addicted people died before reaching recovery?” We’ll never know the answer. But we can be aware of the grace that surrounds us and be grateful for what we have.

Today let me be aware of grace. Let me focus on near misses survived rather than on wishes that didn’t come true.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Those who follow the crowd are quickly lost in it.

~ Author unknown ~

Children will often defend something they want to have or do by using the argument “But everyone else has it” or “All of my friends’ parents said they could do it.” As you well know, such arguments often fall on deaf ears, and parents make decisions and choices based on what they feel is right for the child and right for the family in general.

While it is important for you to follow the process of recovery, the tools of the program, and the guidance of your sponsor and others, it is equally important for you to develop your own voice, identify your own needs, and make choices and decisions that are right for you.

Sometimes it will be appropriate for you to “follow the crowd” as you recover. Other times it will be vital for you to create your own path and “go it alone” as you set goals and guidelines that address your particular set of circumstances. How you make reparations with your family members, partner, or children; how you rebuild your life in the community; and how you renew or revitalize your career will be unique for you. You can certainly embrace the similarities you have with others in the fellowship, but you also need to honor your differences.

I will develop independence in recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The preservation of health is a duty. Few seem conscious that there is such a thing as physical morality.

~ Herbert Spencer ~

Do we realize we have an obligation to our bodies to stay healthy? Before we entered the program, we may have abused ourselves with chemicals, diets or binges, little sleep, or chains of cigarettes and coffee. Now that we’re in the program, we’re beginning to realize our mental health has a direct bearing on how we treat ourselves physically.

If we’ve been cooped up in an office or home, we need to pay attention to getting fresh air and exercise. We can go for a walk, meditate, or take a warm bath. We can eat a nutritious dinner and get to bed early for a good night’s sleep. Just as we have a moral obligation to our mental health, so too do we have a moral obligation to our physical health.

I can eat good foods, breathe in fresh air, and exercise for my best benefit. Tonight I will rest soundly to treat my physical health well.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Heeding the slogans

Our fellowship adheres to many slogans that might at first appear trite: Easy Does It, First Things First, Live and Let Live, One Day at a Time, Keep It Simple.

Many wise individuals developed these slogans from their experiences, and the phrases are anything but trite. The next time we hear them, let’s consider if they’re working in our lives. It may be the difference be-tween working a good program or just staying off the stuff.

Do I fully understand and appreciate the meanings of our slogans?

Higher Power, let me learn from the experiences of others.

The slogan I will create for today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

To say something nice about themselves, this is the hardest thing in the world for people to do.

~ NANCY FRIDAY ~

Newcomer

Someone paid me a compliment recently, and my response was to disagree! I’m surprised; I thought I’d learned self-esteem in this program. But I’m still embarrassed when people call attention to what’s good about me, even when I share their opinion.

Sponsor

When I was active in my addiction, my drug of choice sometimes felt like a protective cloak—it kept me hidden from myself, and I somehow believed that no one else could see me, either. In early recovery, I felt self-conscious sharing at meetings and embarrassed to be myself in public I thought that invisibility—if only it were possible—would keep me safe from criticism. Criticism was what I’d long ago learned to expect from others, and what I most often leveled at myself.

Like so much else in recovery, it takes time to stop the habit of being harsh with ourselves and to learn to accept and love ourselves unconditionally. Celebrating our anniversaries and acknowledging our large and small victories when we share at meetings help us practice living in the open and savoring the joys of recovery. A sense of inner poise gradually grows within us. We develop generosity toward ourselves, as well as toward others. It’s part of knowing who we really are.

Today, I view myself with love and generosity.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We must work out our spiritual development in our own way and according to our conception of the God of our understanding.

Our success or failure will be deter-mined by the honesty of our efforts and the fidelity with which we practice our convictions.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Opinion(s): There is a difference between sharing our experience and imposing our opinions.

2) Simple: Appreciate simplicity.

3) Working with Others: Carry the message, not the drunk.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

God Is Enough

Lord, I am grateful that when I got to the bottom and there was nothing left but You, I found that You were enough. My surrender and growing spirituality grant me serenity when surrounded with turmoil. I have an active concern for the well-being of other people. My spiritual growth has helped me, through my attitudes and actions, to better live with myself, You, and others.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LOSING INTEREST IN OUTER THINGS?

It happens to some students of prayer who are especially zealous, giving much time to study and meditation, and making more than average progress, that a time comes when their ordinary daily work begins to seem dull, tiresome, and really not worthwhile. Such a person may actually have a very important and interesting position, which most people would consider ideal; but now he is no longer content or happy. He would like to throw up business life altogether and devote all his time to his spiritual development.

The healing of this problem is first to know that a great many people have to meet it. It is not at all uncommon or peculiar to one person; and those who have it always come through it and find themselves happier than ever before because this particular difficulty only happens to wholehearted and zealous people. Such people usually spend too much time in prayer and meditation, and become waterlogged.

Having come through that stage they always find themselves more interested in their business than ever before; they do much better work, and at the same time they progress much faster in their spiritual lives, and have a great deal more power in prayer than they ever had before.

I know that thou canst do everything, and that no thought can be withholden from thee (Job 42:2).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Traveling Light

To stand up, to leave everything behind—to say “Yes!”

~ Dag Hammarskjold ~

Peace Pilgrim was a woman of great faith who changed the world in a unique way. At the age of 45, she let go of her history and set out to walk for peace, keeping no possessions except a toothbrush, a pencil and pad, and the clothes she wore, including a blue tunic bearing the large white letters, Peace Pilgrim. She vowed that she would not eat unless offered food, she would seek no lodging unless it was given, and she would give love to everyone she met. Peace Pilgrim often slept under bridges and stood in the rain. After a while, she became a legend, and when she entered a city, the media would interview her and she would be asked to speak to school and civic groups.

Peace Pilgrim’s message of kindness and compassion was compelling, and without creating any organization or charging any fees for her services, she inspired many thousands of people. Before her death, she walked over 30,000 miles. I saw a video of a television interview with Peace Pilgrim, and her eyes were bright, joyful, and among the clearest I have ever seen. While she had hardly any physical means, she was wealthy beyond measure.

How much stuff do you actually need? Do the things you have make you happy, or are they weights on your soul? If you were promised great peace and freedom by lightening up on your possessions, would you do it?

Our possessions are valuable inasmuch as they bring us joy or serve our spiritual growth. There is nothing wrong with having things, but if the things bring you down, you cannot afford them. Consider the things in your life that bring you closer to God and the things that move you away from Spirit. Then go about the business of blessing what heals you and releasing what binds you.

Teach me how to live in this world. Give me the strength to travel lightly.

I use what I need and release all else.

[bluidkiti]

December 19

Step by Step

Today, “Keep It Simple,: I won’t fight myself, anyone or anything so I can reach one of the program’s most cherished prizes: serenity. Instead, I will simply close my mind to the complications of the issues in my life and simply be. I will not focus on reaching the forest without first negotiating the trees, and I will not complicate how to get beyond the trees. I will simply move forward after first doing my best and trusting my Higher Power. If someone tells me the way to sobriety is to stop drinking, I’ll not pollute the answer with complications that make abstinence difficult. I will simply stop. If I have an amend to make, I will not complicate it by predicting or anticipating open arms or rejection; they are beyond my control. I will simply make amends and leave it to the other person and my Higher Power. Today, no complications, no “how’s,” “where’s” or “wherefore’s.” I’ll simply do it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.

~ SAMUEL BUTLER ~

I have felt incomplete most of my life, always in the process of learning and growing, struggling for the day when I would be good enough. I felt like there was a true me hiding in the depths.

I am reminded of the story of Alfred Wallace the naturalist who could no longer bear to watch the struggle of a moth trying to break out of the cocoon so he gently split the cocoon with a knife, only to watch the moth die because it had not developed the strength it needed to live.

When the caterpillar is crawling around it is fully itself, not just a moth in waiting. Later as a chrysalis in the cocoon it is still perfectly the creature it is meant to be.

The quiet child of my past was fully and truly me, the person I needed to have the experiences to develop into the person I am today. Unlike the caterpillar, I can imagine who I might be in the future. That does not mean who I am today is not whole and complete.

Today, I will learn from the caterpillar to love myself in every stage of my being.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE STEPS

There are 12 Steps in the ladder to continued recovery.

~ Anonymous ~

Is there such a thing as “partial recovery”? Can a person work just a few Steps and leave the rest? Can we just “sort of’ do a Fourth Step, like in our minds? Do we really have to write it down as we are instructed? Can we do our Fifth Step with our dog or cat or a favorite tree?

Can we make an amend just in our minds? Can we ask someone to make an amend for us? A person we can’t stand has asked us to be their sponsor. Can we say no? We feel much better about our lives now that we are in recovery, but we really can’t do some of these Steps because they’re too hard.

I have heard such questions and listened to such declarations. I know the facts are quite simple. Those that didn’t work all the Steps DIDN’T make it. Those that do work all the Steps DO make it.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Everybody kind of perceives me as being angry. It’s not anger, it’s motivation.

~ Roger Clemens ~

Anger is not a threat to our recovery, but our failure to channel it and use it well is. Some things deserve anger and should be our targets. Injustice and disrespect to our fellow human beings is a prime example. Out-of-control anger, however, does not serve anyone well.

We can achieve greater peace of mind when we learn to manage our anger rather than hide it. When we learn to focus our anger at worthy targets and express it clearly and directly, without stooping to abusive language or threats, we become much more effective men. That way, anger can be a constructive source of energy and we can hope to resolve it and make things better. We are learning to take our own inventories and to be honest with ourselves about all of our feelings.

Today I will examine myself for my angry feelings and make wise choices about how to manage them.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

No iron bars can hold a bad relationship together. If it is good, a gossamer thread suffices.

~ Jan Pishok ~

We aren’t fooled into believing a bad relationship is good. However, we may stay far too long, unwilling to leave it. Why is it so hard to close some doors?

We may have been taught to deny our pain. When we acknowledge the hurt or anger that results from any relationship, action becomes necessary. Making a change, perhaps deciding to leave, is never easy. But what a shame it is to stay in a relationship that no longer nurtures us. Why do we do it? For many, it’s the fear of the unknown. We have learned to tolerate the pain. We have this program, and using it—particularly our sponsors and the Steps—will give us the courage to do what we need to do for ourselves. But we must make the first move.

If I am not happy in a relationship today, I will use the tools of the program to sort out my options.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am slowly accepting my need for medication

When my therapist first suggested it, I rejected the idea of taking psychiatric medication. I didn’t want to feel weak by using a drug to handle an emotional problem. I didn’t want to feel like I was “crazy.” I got angry at her for merely suggesting it.

It wasn’t easy to face, but eventually it all became clear to me: I’ve tried hard, but I can no longer handle my symptoms on my own. In fact, I am tired of trying. But I don’t want to feel weak, ill, and ashamed. Maybe I can look at taking a psychiatric medication like taking a medication for any illness I might experience.

I will go for the medication assessment and fill the prescription if one is given.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

For what is faith unless it is to believe what you do not see?

~ St. Augustine ~

Faith is one of life’s intangibles that fires our recovery. Faith is trusting in what we cannot see, what we cannot yet feel, what we cannot yet even envision.

When we were drinking or using, most of us believed in nothing we could not sense. Little by little, because our belief in ourselves was so uncertain, our world grew smaller. We had shrunk in fear.

Now our world is expanding again. Step by step we venture out from behind the walls, some of us only in broad daylight, others taking the proverbial step in the dark. Our faith means we trust the process of recovery, that we trust ourselves just a little, that we trust God. Faith gives us everything to live for — because it gives us hope.

Today give me faith in what I cannot see, in what I can’t yet know.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If you value the pursuit of knowledge, we must be free to follow wherever that search may lead us.

~ Adlat E. Stevenson, Jr. ~

Highway signs provide valuable information about what lies ahead. They designate the route on which you are traveling, the posted speed limit, exits, and mile markers. Without signs to guide your travels, it would be easy to get lost.

The road to recovery is similarly filled with multiple “signs” that provide you with information so you can more fully develop your knowledge about addiction and the effects it has had upon your life. The Twelve Steps, for example, comprise valuable “mile markers” that en-able you to see the progress you are making and, as well, the focus and work that lies ahead. The Big Book can be viewed as an inspirational atlas that conveys the journeys others have taken and the obstacles they have overcome to gain a new way of life.

Each day in sobriety represents a time in which you can increase your mileage in the program. Every meeting you attend enriches your knowledge and understanding about recovery as others share their experiences. Each time you pray brings you closer to your Higher Power and a spiritual awakening.

I welcome the signposts in my recovery and the knowledge they bring me.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

What is the source of our first suffering? It is in the fact that we hesitated to speak It was born in the moments when we accumulated silent things within us.

~ Gaston Bachelord ~

We may have learned while growing up that it was easier not to communicate. We may have remained silent rather than risk an argument or a reprimand or a misunderstanding. But as adults, we need to unlearn that behavior and learn to give voice to the muted feelings, thoughts, ideas, and grievances within us.

We first need to risk breaking silence, for the silences we hold within us are like cancers. For as long as we ignore them, they will continue to grow and we will suffer. But if we strive to remove them—one at a time—we will become cleansed of their ill effects.

We may discover things we wanted to say, but didn’t. We can prevent these silences from growing by taking positive action. There are those who will listen to us—our Higher Power, a trusted friend, a meeting group. But it is up to us to take the first step. 

Now is the time to give voice to our inner silences.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Expressing soul

Knowledge and understanding alone do not lead us to the new life. If that were the case, psychiatrists and psychologists would have better success rates with us. So what is the source of our success in finding our paths? It’s our ability to follow our Higher Power’s cues. It’s being tuned in enough to feel and to act on the opportunities our Higher Power presents to us each day.

What comes from the soul originates from the Higher Power. Let us follow the prompting of our soul, so we may better learn what it means to live in the glory of our Higher Power. Acknowledging our Higher Power and applying what we learn from it is what makes us successful.

How well do I express my soul?

Higher Power, through the power you have given me, may I make known your beauty and love to others.

Today I will follow my Higher Power by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Never defend.

~ SHEILA GRAHAM ~

Newcomer

I talked with a family member recently who asked, “Are you still going to those meetings?” The tone of the question seemed to imply that there was something wrong with me for continuing to go.

Sponsor

We’re not in recovery in order to get understanding and approval from our families and old friends; we’re here to treat our addictions—and to save our lives. Nevertheless, it can feel painful when a nonaddict, or an addict who hasn’t found recovery, seems critical of what we’ve come to understand as essential to our health and well-being.

We don’t have to engage in explaining or defending our recovery. A smile and a simple answer are enough. If we wish, we can make an “I am” statement, such as, “Yes, I’m lucky that there are so many meetings to choose from, and that such good people go to them.” Or, “Yes, it gets even better as time goes on.”

Trying to explain to someone who is expressing hostility toward the program or toward us isn’t likely to further our recovery or anyone else’s—and it can lead to frustration and anger. I’ve learned, in recovery, to detach gently from any invitations to debate about this program. It’s not debatable.

Today, my wholehearted acceptance of recovery keeps me from engaging in arguments about it.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is very difficult for an alcoholic to remain sober in continued idleness, and this lesson has been learned the hard way by too many who have tried it.

It is also possible to overwork to the point where we think we need a stimulant to keep going.

There is a big difference between resting time and idle time. Rest is nec-essary, but that does not imply that resting time is idle time. A hobby, as an illustration, may be restful and yet be strenuous. Some of us have been so exhausted from our daily work that attendance at AA meetings was dreaded, yet we forced ourselves to go and the diversion caused us to leave the meeting rested and refreshed.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) STANDARD ACRONYMS: YET: You’ll End There

2) Al-Anon: Learn the difference between being responsible to others and being responsible for others.

3) Drink(ing,): Everything is either a step toward a drink or a step away.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Thank You for Today

Good night, Lord.
Thank You for today, for my sanity, my life,

for the people surrounding me, for fellowship
and my recovery.

Tonight, I also pray for the addicts who still suffer.

I pray that You relieve their suffering if only for
a moment, a moment that may bring them closer
to You and recovery.

I look forward to tomorrow and another

day of sobriety.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE DEVIL’S LAST DITCH

When you have driven the devil out of every other corner of your heart, his last refuge is to take shelter in negative analysis. He will say, “You prayed before and nothing happened,” or, “You have been praying so long for that… “Or perhaps he will say, “There is no way that it can come about.”

When this kind of thing comes into your thought, do not be discouraged but rather rejoice, for this means that satan is positively in his very last ditch, and now is the time to clear him out; and if you will be loyal to God it will not be difficult. Now is the time to know the Truth quietly, and to hold to it in spite of false appearances. Now is the time to witness to the faith that is in you. No finer opportunity for a great step forward spiritually can ever come to you than this one. So take advantage of it and rejoice in your good fortune.

It is not when things are going well that we make our progress. It is not even when things are going wrong and yet we feel sure that we can handle them with prayer, that we advance. it is when, smitten by the temptation to discouragement or even despair, we yet stand for what we know is the Truth, and say with Job, Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him (Job 13:15).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Let’s Dig Here

And a little child shall lead them.

~ Isaiah 11:16 ~

One morning Jeanine’s eight-year-old son informed her, “Last night in a dream, I found a whole dinosaur under the earth and we dug it up. I know where it is; will you take me there?”

“Maybe next summer,” Mom tried to put him off. But when David kept asking her to take him to the site he described, Jeanine decided this would be a good opportunity to take a family trip, and agreed. David was elated, hoping he might someday meet world-famous paleontologist Mark Thurston. When Jeanine, David, and his younger brother arrived at the state park, David pointed, “It’s over there.”

The family trekked to the area, and to assuage David’s eagerness, they began to dig. Before long, one of them found an unusual bone, then another, then another. Jeanine took the bones to the University of Idaho, where a scientist confirmed that these were indeed the bones of a dinosaur. The professor showed the bones to none other than Mark Thurston, who just happened to be visiting the college, and a team was dispatched to investigate. To everyone’s astonishment, they unearthed the skeleton of an entire dinosaur and made history by finding the first fully intact Albertasaurus.

After the find, Thurston told David, “You come see me when you’re ready for college; I’ll put you to work for me.” Jeanine sent me several newspaper clippings and told me that Disney Studios had approached her to do a feature on the story.

We must pay attention to our dreams—not just our sleeping dreams, but the visions and insights that touch us in our waking hours. Spirit is always trying to communicate with us, offering us wisdom to bring us the happiness and success we desire. Our role is to keep our antennae up and trust our guidance.

I pray to be an open channel to receive Your loving messages.

Spirit is using me to do great things.

[bluidkiti]

December 20

Step by Step

“When I entered a sanitarium for prolonged and intensive psychiatric treatment, I was convinced that I was having a serious mental breakdown. I wanted help, and I tried to cooperate. As the treatment progressed, I began to get a picture of myself, of the temperament that had caused me so much trouble. I had been hypersensitive, shy, idealistic. My inability to accept the harsh realities of life had resulted in a disillusioned cynic, clothed in a protective armor against the world’s misunderstanding. That armor had turned into prison walls, locking me in loneliness – and fear. All I had left was an iron determination to live my own life in spite of the alien world – and here I was, an inwardly frightened, outwardly defiant woman, who desperately needed a prop to keep going.

“Alcohol was that prop …” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Personal Stories,” Ch 4 (“Women Suffer Too”), p 226.

Today, my temperament as a drinking alcoholic was such that I can measure any progress in my recovery – if that temperament of then resembles now, I have not shaken off my “protective armor.” If not, I need to realize that armor is not protection from life’s “harsh realities” but in reality enslaves me to servitude to the dysfunctional thinking of alcoholism. My armor, in short, was not a protection against the realities of life but instead my prison that kept me out of life. Today, I look to Step 10 to continue looking for the character defects that forced me into self-isolation with nothing but alcohol and, today, I choose to live my life on life’s terms and not on alcohol’s terms. My prison of addictive behavior was of my own making, and the program guided me out. I look to the program today to stop me from returning. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

~ STEP THREE ~

In this Step I am making a decision to take the rest of the Steps using the Power I identified in Step Two. Once again, this Power can come from Nicotine Anonymous, my Nicotine Anonymous sponsor or any way I choose to view God. There are even atheistic views of this Power. The primary theme of this Step is the removal of self, and the replacing of it with the recovery outlined in Steps Four through Twelve. When I take this Step, I can take it with a fellow Nicotine Anonymous member, or my sponsor or a loved one. I often say the Third Step Prayer to signify that I have made the decision to recover.

“Relieve me of the bondage of self. Help me abandon myself to the spirit. Move me to do good in this world and show kindness. Help me to overcome and avoid anger, resentment, jealousy and any other kind of negative thinking today. Help me to help those who suffer. Keep me alert with courage to face life and not withdraw from it, not to insulate myself from all pain whereby I insulate myself from love as well. Free me from fantasy and fear. Inspire and direct my thinking today; let it be divorced from self-pity, dishonesty and self-seeking motives. Show me the way of patience, tolerance kindliness and love. I pray for all of those to whom I’ve been unkind and ask that they are granted the same peace that I seek.”

After having taken this Step, I do not dwell on my decision, nor do I hesitate. I move right into my personal housecleaning; Steps Four through Nine.

Today, I will remind myself that removal of my self is the only effective method for recovery.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

RECOVERY MASK

It’s easy to fool other people. Fooling yourself is a little harder. Fooling God is impossible.

~ Chris Harrison ~

The question often arises in the Pro-gram as to why “so and so” relapsed after time in recovery. The answer is dishonesty. Most of us agree that before we came into the Program, we hid behind a mask and didn’t let anyone really know us. Since coming into the Program, some of us hide behind the dreaded “Recovery Mask.”

When someone is wearing a Recovery Mask, they deceive others into believing that they’re doing well in recovery. The real danger lies in deceiving themselves into believing the same thing. One thing this false image can’t live with is truth. It would be helpful for them to ask themselves, “When was the last time I shared what was really going on inside me, in my innermost world, with somebody, my sponsor, or my home group?”

It does me harm to hide behind a recovery mask. If I do, I may relapse because I’m not sharing my experience, strength, and hope, but only my opinions, attitudes and advice.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Be what you is, cuz if you be what you ain’t, then you ain’t what you is.

~ Tombstone inscription, Tombstone, Arizona ~

When a young man was worried about how to get a special woman to like him, he talked to his grandfather about it. The advice his grandfather gave him was, “Just be yourself.” That was easier said than done, but it was good advice. In order to be ourselves, we must first get to know ourselves and then make peace with who we are.

In taking an inventory of ourselves, in admitting our faults and our strengths, and in facing those we have harmed and repairing our mistakes, we are discovering ourselves and accepting ourselves. That is how we fill out our true manhood. No one stands taller than the man who knows himself, with all his weaknesses and all his assets, and accepts himself as he is.

Today I accept myself and continue to grow into a better person.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I had always thought self-esteem was a state of being. Now I realize it’s the constant decision to love myself, regardless of circumstances, all day long.

~ Mary Casey ~

What does it mean to love ourselves all day long? It means loving ourselves even when we feel shame for having yelled at a friend. It means loving ourselves even when we secretly wish harm on another. It means continuing to love ourselves even when we let opportunities to do something good for other people slip by.

There will be days when we need to make the conscious decision to love ourselves moment by moment. We will never be perfect, but we can be better people than we were in the past. We are making progress. A brief personal inventory will reflect this: perhaps we are learning to think before we act; perhaps we are treating friends or even strangers less critically; perhaps we are seeing the benefits of loving others unconditionally.

In time we will realize the gains we have made. We will see that it is possible to love ourselves fully, even though we have not become perfect.

I will love my every attempt to be kind and thoughtful today. I will forgive each of my failures.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to laugh more

Being sick is no fun. I didn’t have a great sense of humor before I got sick. I’d hate to lose what I had.

In coping with my dual disorder, it has been difficult for me to be anything but serious. But when I’m given a little nudge, when I get just a little perspective, I can see that I’m too wrapped up in my pain—I haven’t laughed in weeks. I want to change that. Humor—as I faintly recall—really feels good. It loosens me up. I forget about myself for a moment or two. It makes my life easier somehow (even when I feel like being somber). I could say that humor is therapeutic—but that would be taking it too seriously.

Today I will remember how good I feel when I laugh. I will look for the silly, the witty, the light-hearted, the absurd in my day.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

In losing a fortune, many a lucky elf has found Himself.

~ Horace Smith ~

By the time we walked into our first Twelve Step meeting many of us had a long list of the things we’d lost. But what had we gained?

Recovery and the Twelve Steps can help us put our losses in perspective, can show us their good sides. For some of us drinking or using drove our families away. For others gambling caused us to lose a fortune. For still others perhaps the losses weren’t so visible or dramatic, but they were losses all the same. For most of us the biggest loss was invisible, one we were numb to — the loss of ourselves.

So where is the good in any of that? Our suffering has deepened us, revealing our common bond with all humankind, and it has also emptied us of false values — it has shown us what matters. Our addictions reveal us for the truly spiritual people we are. We were searching for something back then, probably alone, with no notion of the consequences. Now we have a second chance to find ourselves, a Higher Power, and the love of others.

Today give me the strength to continue my search.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Sharing is sometimes more demanding than giving.

~ Mary Catherine Bateson ~

Not letting others see or know who you really are— your thoughts, feelings, dreams, past experiences, hobbies, and your wants and needs—is like spending hours climbing up a mountain and then stopping just short of the summit. Being outdoors, feeling the physical exertion of the climb, and ascending higher with each step are all enjoyable activities, but not bringing your journey to its intended destination shuts you off from being able to fully appreciate and understand the experience.

Similarly, spending time with others but keeping conversations limited to general topics is not sharing. Listening to the thoughts and feelings of others but being guarded with your own can deprive you of the full experience of emotional intimacy. Even though sharing with others can make you uncomfortable and is similar to taking a risk because you are entrusting them with your innermost thoughts and feelings, it is vital to building meaningful relationships.

Intimacy is a gift that can be as glorious and life- changing as reaching the top of a majestic summit. It can help you discover ways in which you are like others, foster greater trust and honesty in your relationships, help you to develop faith, and nurture healthy personal growth.

I risk intimacy so I can experience life in more meaningful ways.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

‘Tis pitiful the things by which we are rich or poor—a matter of coins, coats and carpets, a little more or less stone, wood or paint, the fashion of a cloak or hat. . . .

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

What are riches? Are they the luxurious feel of a mink coat, the weight of a bulging wallet, a filled jewelry box, or the size of a bank account or stock portfolio? Or are riches intangibles—things we cannot see or touch or earn or spend? Perhaps riches are happiness, serenity, and faith.

Recalling Dickens’s tale A Christmas Carol, we re-member that even with all the riches imaginable, Ebenezer Scrooge was miserable and friendless. The happiest and most contented man was Bob Cratchit, who was poor in wealth, had a crippled son and other children to feed and keep healthy. Yet his home and his heart were filled with love, peace, and faith.

We can ask our Higher Power for the greatest riches: peace and joy in our hearts and homes. We don’t need presents or luxurious finery to make us happy. To become richer, we need to open our hearts to the wealth of wonderful feelings around us.

Tonight, let me give thanks for the riches I have inside. Those are the greatest gifts I can receive from my Higher Power.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Living abundantly

Leaving our drug-filled lives and turning to our Creator in this fellowship does not mean becoming mindless, spiritless, sexless robots. It doesn’t mean all fun will be taken from us.

Being one with our Higher Power doesn’t take life away. It gives us the opportunity to live a life of abundance. We learn to think, feel, and breathe with more perception and depth than we could have ever before imagined.

Is my life full and rich?

Higher Power, let my eyes see the beauty, let my ears hear the laughter, let my body feel the joy, and let my words spread the hope.

Today I will enrich my life by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous, unpremeditated act unthout benefit of experience.

~ HENRY MILLER ~

Newcomer

I’ve made a wrong decision, and now I’m experiencing the consequences. I’m full of regret and shame—I don’t know how I’m going to live with myself.

Sponsor

Whether mistakes concern work, relationships, or any other aspect of our lives, we are not unique in making them. All of us, at times, have done or said things we wish we’d done differently. A cook learns through trial and error how to season a dish; a scientist explores what may turn out to be a blind alley as he or she attempts to prove a hypothesis; a ballplayer sometimes strikes out. Taking risks is necessary if any of us is to accomplish anything original or worthwhile.

Our mistakes are a part of our education in recovery. If we never made them, we might never know who we are, who we’d like to be, or how we want to act in the future. If our mistake has harmed another person or institution, we can acknowledge the error and do our best to make restitution. If it’s our own pride that we’ve harmed, we can take a deep breath and move on, wiser and more generous than we were before.

Today, I smile at mistakes, giving myself and others room to be human.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Any constructive program of living is a process of character building that lifts us above commonplace worldly affairs to the higher sphere of the soul.

In this way, the house of the soul becomes the temple of the God in us, a cathedral of the spirit, where you and God mutually reside in love and harmony.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Heal(ing): Numb is dumb; feel to heal.

2) Optimist/pessimist: Don’t be a W.C.S. person. That’s Worst Case scenario.

3) Simple: Important things are simple; it’s the simple things that are hard.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Teach Me Your Will

Lord, take me from insanity;
Show me the way to serenity;
Remove my shortcomings;
Guide me toward forgiveness;
Remind me of my will;
Teach me Your will.
God, I ask that You love me until

I am able to love myself;
<>Believe in me as I learn to believe in You;
Trust me until I can trust completely in You;
Be with me now just as You have been
with me in the past.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LIFE IS LIKE THAT

You form certain beliefs, for one reason or another—and then you have to live with them. When you were growing up, well-meaning people told you many negative things by way of warning, thereby implanting fears; and these fears are with you toddy, consciously or sub-consciously. Other problems you brought here with you when you were born.

You meet your fears dramatized. The things that we fear in our hearts have a way of coming to us in the guise of other people’s acts; of business conditions; of a breakdown in some part of the body.

Thank God it is not necessary as a rule to delve into the recesses of the subconscious and dredge for these things. In the spiritual teaching, as given in the Bible, we learn that by beating the symptoms spiritually (not, of course, covering up symptoms, but beating them) the fear or false suggestion that caused the symptom disappears too, and the patient is free.

Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace … (Job 22:21). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Well Adjusted

When we allow ourselves to feel our feelings, what should be intolerable becomes intolerable.

~ Kenny Loggins ~

In an experiment, scientists placed a group of frogs in a tub of water and heated the water. As the water became hot quickly, the frogs jumped out. In another experiment, the scientists put frogs in a similar tub and increased the heat by a few degrees each day. Daily, the frogs adapted and stayed in the pond until they died. Through gradually adjusting to an unnatural environment, they lost their sensitivity to pain and paid a dear price. This phenomenon is called “drift.”

We consider it admirable to be well adjusted, but the real question is: “Well adjusted to what?” If you are well adjusted to pain, conflict, and poverty thinking, you are not well adjusted at all. If, however, you are well adjusted to listening to your inner voice and acting on it, you are well adjusted, indeed.

We drift spiritually when we accept things that hurt us for so long that we lose our ability to feel pain. While pain is not our natural state or our destiny, and we are certainly not meant to live in pain, pain is the signal that we must make a change. We cannot afford to lose our ability to hear that signal.

To avoid drift, begin to tell the truth about your experience. If you let yourself feel your feelings, you will discover valuable messages that will guide you to be in your right place with the right people at the right time. Many people have told me they had a bad intuition about being in a relationship with someone or entering into a particular business venture, but they overrode their gut feelings and regretted it later. Your body will speak to you. Your gut may say, “Yes!” or “Not for you,” and it is up to you to hear and act on the voice of love and wisdom within you; it is your best friend.

Show me the way to my good. Help me hear Your guidance and act on it.

[bluidkiti]

December 21

Step by Step

“Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, Step Seven

Today, let me not be too eager to take the vital Seventh Step for, if I act prematurely, the defects I ask to be removed but am not truly willing to surrender may come back and bite me in the form of a slip or relapse. Step Seven is the culmination of the previous three Steps in which we first make our “searching and fearless moral inventory,” and then admit “the exact nature of our wrongs” to “God, to ourselves and to another human being.” But the Sixth Step may pack the most potent punch in that it requires us to be “entirely ready” to have the Higher Power of our understanding remove our shortcomings. If today is the one I decide to take the Seventh Step, grant that I be genuinely ready so that I may not later take back a defect that could be yet another downfall. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Show up, pay attention, tell the truth and don’t be attached to the outcome.

~ ANGELES ARRIEN ~

As the winter solstice approaches and the days become shorter, I am reminded of the darkness that seemed to grip me with increasing strength in the final days of my active addiction: the social ostracism; the fear, anxiety and worry over the harm I was causing myself physically; the utter hopelessness I felt about ever being able to quit.

I feared living without my constant companion. I anticipated that life without nicotine would be impossible. But the solstice teaches me that this projection was unwarranted. Just when it seems the darkness will never end, there comes a turning point when the days become longer and warmer. Just as I anticipated that life would be unbearable without nicotine, recovery teaches me that life can filled with so much goodness, beyond my wildest dreams.

Today, I choose to live in anticipation that light inevitably follows darkness.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERVICE

In about the same degree as you are helpful, you will be happy.

~ Karl Reiland ~

The service work we are called to do in Step Twelve is a result of our spiritual awakening. When most of us thought of service, we thought of restaurant help, chores around the house, washing windows. The thought of service was burdensome if not downright irritating. We probably schemed throughout our lives to do as little service as possible. Every moment we gave to someone else was one less moment we could spend on ourselves. This stands to reason, for we were totally self-centered. Even those of us who acted as if’ we cared normally received much more than we ever gave.

The 12 Step way of life produces “other-centeredness.” We, by the grace of God, care less about ourselves and more about our fellows.

When I pass on my recovery, I keep it. This spiritual paradox becomes an all-determining reality for me, that to keep what I have found, I must give it away. Service becomes a way of life.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

God brought light out of darkness, not out of lesser light;
God can bring thy summer out of winter, though thou have no spring.
All occasions invite God’s mercies, and all times are God’s seasons.

~ John Donne ~

Despair has been no stranger to many of us. We recall times when all spirit and all hope seemed to evaporate. We may still be subject to dark moods. In our bleakest moments, we wonder where to turn for hope. We may see no reason for optimism as we look at our situation. In those difficult times we are most in need of the support of God, our Higher Power. The greatest spiritual teachers and all the world’s great religions tell us that God is present to those most in need.

In our darkest hours, God is with us, within us, beside us, supporting us. Perhaps we experience the presence of God in a call to a friend, a bird lighting on a branch, or a beautiful song on the radio. And out of darkness comes light. Today’s difficulties are only one moment in the flow of our lives and they will change.

Today is another occasion that invites God’s mercies. 

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We get love, assistance, and companionship in our relationships; we must each find our purpose and our strength in our own soul.

~ Jane Nakken ~

Relationships offer us not only opportunities to express love but also experiences that develop a full range of emotions. We learn about anger and forgiveness. We experience joy and self-pity. We cultivate trust and learn to live with occasional fear. Without relationships we’d live colorless, shallow lives.

Relationships reveal our character, our values. People come to know us by how we react to friends and strangers, by our willingness to let others travel their own path, by our decision to be guided by our inner voice rather than the prodding of others. Others’ responses also help us know who we are. We may learn more about ourselves from how others respond to us than from any other source.

I will notice how others respond to me today. I’ll discover who they think I am by how they treat me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can do one positive thing today

For a long time I was stuck in a rut. I kept having symptoms, getting high, cutting back, then having symptoms again—over and over. I had little strength or desire to change my ways. Doing anything different was frightening.

Even with some time in dual recovery I still find that change is hard, but it’s getting easier. What helps the most is when I manage to do one small thing different in my life—just one thing—that I set out to do that day Then I feel that I am making change, making progress. Change happens one step at a time. My task is to keep taking these steps, however small.

I will write down one small thing I can do today to make change in my life—and then do it.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Friendship is a sheltering tree.

~ Samuel Taylor Coleridge ~

It’s difficult to imagine a sadder, lonelier life than one without friends. A friend is someone we can laugh and cry with, get mad at the world with, and share our most secret thoughts with. When trouble comes, a friend is someone we can turn to for help without fear of being turned away or judged.

One of the ironies of addiction is that it tends to destroy healthy friendships while it creates unhealthy ones. In alcoholism for instance, when our friends stopped calling us because of our drinking, our other “friend,” the bottle, always seemed to be there.

Recovery is the time to say goodbye to this and other unhealthy friendships and make new ones. It may be scary to let go because we may not know what life will be like without addiction. It is a leap of faith. The good news is that there are lots of other people who have made these changes and are now happier than ever before. Our Twelve Step groups are gatherings of friends who have a common purpose and goal and are willing to go to any means to attain that goal— sobriety. These friends are there to help us attain and maintain the same goal, one day at a time. That’s what real friendship is all about.

Today I am grateful for friends. Help me never to take them for granted, and when I am ready and able, may I be a friend to others.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

There seems to be so much more winter than we need this year.

~ Kathleen Norris ~

The shortest day and longest night of the year is known as winter solstice. It signals the gradual lengthening of light in the days to come and the approach of spring. But when you are stuck in the midst of winter, you may find it hard to believe the renewal of spring lies ahead. You may have the tendency to shut yourself off from people. You may have less interest in attending meetings. You may feel overwhelmed by the pressure and stress of the holidays. Or you may just generally feel out of sorts.

The winter offers you opportunities to strengthen your resiliency. You have faced tough times in the past and survived them. Use this knowledge to survive any dark periods in the present.

Strive to maintain a positive attitude. Understand that you have the strength and commitment to face any challenge. Nurture yourself. Pay attention to your needs. Set aside time each day to engage in enjoyable activities. And utilize prayer and meditation to strengthen your spiritual connection. By doing these things now, you will be that much stronger in the days that lie ahead.

Winter is a time in which I can grow toward renewed.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

It usually happened … particularly at the beginning of a holiday. Then, when I was hoping for nothing but sleep and peace, the chattering echoes of recent concerns would race through my head, and the more I sought rest the more I could not find it.

~ Joanna Field ~

Stress, anxiety, fear, and worry are especially dominant before holidays. The upcoming family events, gift exchange, cooking, and scheduling seem to take precedence. Yet there are ways to find peace and serenity amidst all the excitement.

Instead of focusing on things we don’t like about the upcoming holiday season, we can focus on things we do like. Such things may be as simple as: “I’m looking forward to seeing my sister,” or “I like receiving cards from old friends,” or “I like the snow on the pine trees.”

We can have a nice time this season by putting energy into the things we enjoy. We can go to many meetings, make plans with close friends or our sponsor, and meditate to keep calm and serene. Tonight we can put the stress of the upcoming holidays to rest by remembering ourselves first. 

How can I use the program to relax my thoughts tonight?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Knowing God loves us

No matter how bad we abused drugs, no matter how desperate we became, our Higher Power still gave us the opportunity to recover. We need never think that opportunity has passed us by. Our Higher Power’s grace is limitless.

We must never feel that it’s too late or that we have failed too often to be able to turn to our Higher Power. It loves us, and it is loving us now, today, always. All things are possible with our Higher Power, and it will always give us life and love unless we choose otherwise.

Can I feel my Higher Power’s love now?

May I know that any day is an acceptable day to seek love and forgiveness from my Higher Power.

I will choose my Higher Power’s love today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I graduated first in my class from alibi school.

~ JEFFREY McDANIEL ~

Newcomer

I still have the bad habit of over explaining my reasons when I’m saying no to someone. I feel guilty. I still can’t tell the simple truth, if I know that I’m going to disappoint someone.

Sponsor

When we were active in our addictions, shame and guilt were a part of every day, especially where our interactions with other people were concerned. When we acted out our addictions in spite of repeated resolutions and promises, we disappointed ourselves and those with whom our lives were interwoven. It seemed easier to invent excuses than to face our inability to say no, our inability to show up for everything we’d agreed to do.

Now that we’re in recovery, we’re learning how we want to spend our time and what is realistic to expect of ourselves. Our old habit of providing alibis may not have left us yet, however. We may feel the need to explain and elaborate because we don’t yet feel fully entitled to have needs and desires of our own; whatever someone asks of us, we think we should take on.

The need for excuses gradually leaves us as our tolerance and understanding of ourselves grow. We become more practical about what our schedules and energies allow us to undertake, more authentic about what we ourselves want, as we come to know and esteem ourselves in recovery.

Today, I need no alibi for simply being myself.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

If the purpose of living is to live so that our lives will be more like that Divine Example that God has disclosed to us, then only our deeds in life can serve as our advocate at the bar of Infinite Justice.

It will be our deeds that will speak for or against us, and we will be judged worthy and well qualified only if our actions so testify.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Working with Others: Carry the message, not the junkie.

2) STANDARD ACRONYMS: YET: You’re Eligible Too

3) Al-Anon: Let it go, it was never yours to begin with.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

To Grow and Blossom

Lord, I mourn the loss of my innocence. By sharing my experiences, I hope to recapture it. Lord, I long to feel more, trust more, laugh more, and live life fully. Show me the way, God. I thank You for my renewed sanity and my sobriety. When I have both, I can grow and blossom. Everyone in my family, the Fellowship, and my neighborhood can benefit from my peace.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

STOP LIMITING GOD

The principal reason why prayers are not answered is because in our hearts we limit the power of God. The Bible constantly tells us that the people got into trouble because they limited the Holy One. When you say, “There is no way out of my difficulty,” what can it possibly mean except that you cannot see a way out? When you say, “It is too late now,” what can that possibly mean except that it is too late for you?

When you pray you are turning to the power of God and surely you will admit that God is omnipotent, and therefore nothing can be too difficult, or too late, or too soon for Him. You will surely admit that Infinite Wisdom knows at least more than you do, to put the thing rather mildly. Well, Infinite Wisdom takes action when we pray and so our own limitations do not matter—unless we think they do.

Children often find themselves completely overcome by a difficulty that a grown-up person easily solves. What to the child seems an impossibility is quite easy to his father, and so even our greatest difficulties are simple to God.

Infinite Wisdom knows a beautiful and joyous solution to any dilemma. Do not limit the power of God for good in your life.

. . . Is my hand shortened at all, that it cannot redeem? or have I no power to deliver?. . . (Isaiah 50:2). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Cash Flow

Do what you love and the money will follow.

~ Marsha Sinetar ~

“I had a well-paying job, but I couldn’t pay my bills,” Cindy told “I didn’t understand how I could be making so much money and not make ends meet. Then I realized that the only thing I liked about the job was the salary. I did not enjoy going to work, and I daydreamed about all kinds of other things that were more fulfilling to me. Suddenly, I realized that my money problems were tied to my levels of integrity and joy. My internal energy was clogged by being in a place I did not love, and so the external current of abundance and energy, represented by my cash flow, was also obstructed. I decided to follow my heart and trust Spirit to take care of me. I quit my job and immediately became happier. I haven’t had a cash-flow problem since I quit.”

What is happening in your financial world is a reflection of what is happening in your consciousness. If you are in a state of joy, celebration, and the awareness that you live in an abundant universe, you will manifest those conditions. If you feel internally plugged up, empty, and under-supported, you will see those energies mirrored in your checkbook.

The key to abundance is to get your priorities in order. Prosperity begins with a state of mind, not a bankbook figure. When I began to write, I did so out of joy and delight; making money was not my goal. My readers wanted to tap into that consciousness, and more money flowed to me. Then I generated higher expenses and began to think about what I could do to make more money. Immediately, my creativity jammed up, and the money scene stagnated. Then I remembered how I began; I retraced my steps to my initial motif of writing for fulfillment and service, and the money flow increased. It is a poor idea to make money for money’s sake, and a great idea to ask, “What would I love to do?” and “How can I serve?”

Forget about your bankbook balance, and return to balance with the universe; the bankbook will come along well enough.

Help me remember that all the riches of the universe are within me.

I live from love, and the universe responds instantly and abundantly.

[bluidkiti]

December 22

Step by Step

Today, the uncertainty of the darkness of endless night eventually gives way to the certainty of daylight and, today, I begin to emerge from the darkness with the affirmation that I need and am worthy of something better. No more nightly binges into alcoholic oblivion that fuel the regrets, remorse and self-pity the morning after, and no more wallowing in anguish that is little more than my pathetic rationalization that I have to drink. My mistakes have been many and great, the pain I inflicted on others and myself deep and perhaps not able to be healed, and the lies too many and too great that, now, not even I can believe them. The darkness that masks the uncertainty of my nights has finally given way to daylight and, today, someone has thrown me the lifeline of AA. If I can go on blind faith alone that I am worthy, I can grab the lifeline. Today, I will. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

The wind of God’s grace is always blowing, but you must raise your sails.

~ VIVEKANANDA ~

After almost thirty years of smoking cigarettes, I finally realized I was insane. This enlightenment came to me one morning at six a.m. as I lit my first smoke of the day. I had been awakened at four a.m. once again, coughing so hard I could barely catch my breath. And here I was, two hours later, smoking a cigarette. Insanity.

Divine guidance led me to a counselor. I told him how I had come to the realization that I was insane, and in reply he handed me a copy of Nicotine Anonymous: The Book. I realized that I was being asked to “walk the walk,” instead of just talking the talk. I admitted that I was an addict to nicotine, I was powerless over my addiction, and that my life had become unmanageable.

I have not used nicotine since December 22, 2000. People congratulated me and praised me for my willpower. My willpower was not strong enough; my willpower had been losing the battle with my addiction for years. Only when I surrendered my will to my Higher Power was I graced with freedom from the chains of my addiction.

Today, I am- willing to listen to my Higher Power, and to act as I am guided.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CONSISTENCY

We cannot remain consistent with the world save by growing inconsistent with our past selves.

~ Havelock Ellis ~

Mathematics is a science of formulas. These formulas always give us consistent results. Two plus two is consistently four. The universe is a place of consistency.

There is something to be said for consistency in our own lives. It is wonderful when we do not have to wake up each morning and invent new identities like a fugitive, or invent a new game plan like a con man.

It is a great feeling when we are not fighting the universe each day. When we know our role and choose to play that role with all our energies, we are each of great and lasting value.

It is very important that I do the job I have been assigned. My universe depends on my actions to work properly. My consistent behavior makes my whole universe run smoothly.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Courage is not the absence of despair, it is, rather the capacity to move ahead in spite of despair.

~ Rollo May ~

Some days we wake up to overwhelming feelings that things look bleak. We see loss and danger around us, and we fear for the future. That is when our character is most tested. That is when we are called to continue to just put one foot in front of the other. There is no need to solve all our problems right away or to change the world immediately. Courage isn’t necessarily a feeling of confidence that we can triumph over all odds. It’s knowing that we can move ahead one step at a time, and it’s taking positive action in the face of our fears.

Each day we can do small things that are constructive. By these small things, we can place ourselves on the positive side of life’s equation. We can put our weight where we want to go. That is courage.

Today, in the face of my despair, I will focus my efforts on the side of my hopes and values.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Would you rather be cursing the darkness or lighting the candles?

~ Connie Hilliard ~

Feeling despair over situations, be they grave or less significant, can become habitual. Prior to recovery, our first response to virtually every circumstance that didn’t please us may have been despair. How grateful we can be that we are finally learning to see the glass as half-full rather than as half-empty. It’s really not that difficult to do, and the small shift in our perspective results in a huge attitude adjustment. This in turn influences the outcomes we experience.

How powerful is our attitude! No longer can we be overwhelmed by even the most dire of circumstances if we remember to stay in charge of our attitude. Taking active charge of our responses to the events in our lives also strengthens our character and helps us to develop the integrity we long for. Our assets will flourish with seemingly little effort if we let every situation be an opportunity to demonstrate a positive attitude. Adherence to this decision promises profound pleasures!

I can make my day as bright as I choose. My attitude can light my way.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can stay well if I stay sober

I feel the urge to drink. I haven’t used in several weeks, but the urges still come. Sometimes it’s hard to resist them, especially when my problems pile up and I can’t see how they will ever get resolved.

What helps me at times like this is to recollect how far I’ve come in my recovery. I’m not only sober these days, but with the help of my psychiatric medication and counseling, I am stable. Since I have been able to get a hold on my symptoms, I’m thinking more clearly these days and I can concentrate on what I need to do to recover. I don’t feel so vulnerable. If I gave in to an urge now, I’d lose my sobriety and I might interfere with my meds. For dual recovery, I need sobriety and stability.

Today I will meditate on how my life has improved since I got abstinent.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Life is a great bundle of little things.

~ Oliver Wendell Holmes ~

We make progress every day in recovery, even when we are unaware. This is especially true if we suffer a relapse. To many people relapse could easily be the breaking point, but others of us have come through even stronger than we were before. Where do we find this strength? We have accepted God and His will in our lives, and understand that to make progress we must also accept some suffering along the way.

Before we came into the program our suffering was at its worst. The decision to seek help was our first step of progress. A willingness to accept the help that was offered was our second important step toward health. We continue to make progress every day even when we only seem to inch along. At every stage of recovery we can be proud of what we’ve accomplished and it’s important to stop and acknowledge this. Once we accept that our pain can give us strength we begin to learn a positive lesson from every situation.

Today let me turn some of my pain into progress.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

To fear is one thing. To let fear grab you by the tail and swing you around is another.

~ Katherine Paterson ~

Everyone feels afraid at times. Do you allow your anger to limit you, or do you release the hold it has upon you?

The best way to handle your fear is to welcome it into your life. First identify your fear. What is it you are afraid of at this particular moment? Then, feel this fear. Close your eyes and let it course through your body As it does so, focus your attention on the energy it is exerting. It may be causing your muscles to tighten or your body to shiver. Your palms may feel cold and clammy. Or you may be sweating. Then identify all of the emotions your fear is bringing up for you, such as worry, doubt, or pain.

Once you have done these things, you have welcomed fear into your life. You have named it and become more familiar with how it makes you feel. You can then strive to minimize your fear. Think about actions you can take that will help ease the tension your fear is causing so you can put your fear into better perspective. Call your sponsor, write your feelings in a journal, or put your energy into a constructive activity.

I welcome my fears so I can release them from my life.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

. . . I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it.

~ Rita Mae Brown ~

We’ve probably made many changes in our lives since we joined the program. We may have improved our job performance. We may be attending school, struggling to attain the degree we never got when we were using. We may be spending a majority of our evenings at meetings instead of partying as we did in the past. And we may feel life isn’t fun anymore—that it just doesn’t have the excitement of the past. But did we enjoy our lives before the program?

Today we’re learning to live in a whole new way. We made a lot of changes in our behavior. And we’re learning to enjoy things we never did before—to appreciate a beautiful sunset, to look forward to being around people at a meeting.

If we forget to enjoy today’s precious moments, we can change that right now. Tomorrow is full of enjoyment yet to come!

Have I enjoyed my life today? What can I do to enjoy my life tomorrow?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Inner guidance

The way is simple. It is through our Higher Power. Those who seek fulfillment through drugs, friends, or mysterious cults will be troubled and confused, for our Higher Power is within us. Only we can know what it has to say to us—not others.

Do I follow my conscience in all things?

Higher Power, today I will know and listen to the “still small voice within.”

Today I will seek inner guidance by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Rage . . . is a hell of an effective mood changer!

~ GUY KETTELHACK ~

Newcomer

I’m sick of these people who just do and say whatever they like, in the name of freedom in recovery. There’s one character who always tells me I’ve set the chairs up the wrong way, and another one who regularly comments to me after I’ve shared at the meeting that I don’t sound so good. I’ve had enough. The next time one of these people attacks me, I’m just going to walk out.

Sponsor

Yes, there are some people in recovery who are overly critical or inappropriate. There are some people who have weak boundaries, people who are intolerant of others, even some who are mentally ill. But they’re a small fraction of the people we meet in recovery, just as such people are only a small part of the larger human community.

Anger pouring through us can give us feelings of energy, power, and satisfaction and can compensate for a sense of injustice and powerlessness. But its satisfactions are short-lived and don’t offer long-term solutions to our problems. If anger causes us to leave meetings, we may be on a dangerous course that could lead to alienation from the program and a return to addiction. Anger itself can become addictive.

To “Detach with love,” as an Al-Anon slogan suggests, is the ideal response to people whose behavior upsets us. If we’re not ready to detach with love, we can detach, for now, with whatever feeling arises in us. That doesn’t mean cheating ourselves by walking out of meetings. It means refusing to engage in argument. We can abstain from participating, saying simply, “I’m sorry you feel that way,” and continue working our program of recovery.

Today, I detach with love from people and situations that trigger my anger.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is frequently distressing to observe the attitude of the slipee when he sobers up and endeavors to get back on the Program. Some apparently think it was something to be expected, others feel that it was a necessary part of their alcoholic education and that their slip makes them full-fledged members. Still others take the attitude of “So I slipped, well, what the hell of it?”

They ignore entirely the fact that they have injured AA, as well as themselves. And how about the guys who had to neglect new men, possibly, in order to sober them up? 

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Drink(ing,): First the man takes a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes the man (Japanese proverb).

2) Heal(ing): Pain heals; abuse scars.

3) Optimist/pessimist: None ever ruined their eyesight by looking at the bright side of things.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Your Destiny

Watch your thoughts,

they become your words.

Watch your words,

they become your actions.

Watch your actions,

they become your habits.

Watch your habits,

they become your character.

Watch your character,

it becomes your destiny.

~ Author unknown ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOUR OWN VALUATION

The world will take you at your own valuation. Your body will take you at your own valuation. Your business will take you at your own valuation; for the value that you really put upon yourself is the one that manifests. You may say, “But that cannot be true, because I know several people who are always boasting and pretending and yet no one ever takes them seriously.”

Please note that I said the value you really put upon yourself. People who boast, bluff, and pretend have really a poor opinion of themselves—or why would they pretend? And it is this poor opinion or sense of inferiority that is demonstrated in the failure that such people always make of their lives.

The man who really believes that his wares are excellent does not dream of lying about them. The man who is satisfied with what he is has no incentive to pretend to be something he is not. The man who is conscious of substantial achievement has no desire to boast.

Nature always takes you at your own valuation. Believe that you are the child of God. Believe that you express Life, Truth, Love. Believe that Wisdom guides you. Believe that you are a special enterprise on the part of God—and what you really believe, that you will demonstrate.

Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be . . . (1 John 3:2). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Enough of a Reason

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

~ Oscar Wilde ~

My friend Bette was in conflict over turning on her Christmas tree lights. “I usually don’t turn on the tree lights unless I have company,” Bette told me. “One night I was alone, and I felt like looking at the lights. I thought that it would be foolish and wasteful to turn them all on just for myself. Then I realized that I was enough of a reason. I put on the lights and enjoyed one of the most meaningful Christmas- season evenings I can remember.”

Do you realize that you are enough of a reason to create something beautiful around you? As my friends Jon-Marc and Anastasia were planning their wedding, they learned an important lesson in self-honoring. “When we considered the cost of flowers, our initial reaction was, That’s beyond our budget,’” they told me. “Then we looked at each other and said, ‘We and our wedding are worth the flowers!’ The floral arrays turned out to be one of the most meaningful aspects of our celebration.”
A bumper sticker affirms, “I do not need an excuse to experience joy.” We may feel that we need to justify doing something wonderful for ourselves. We declare, “I have worked hard,” or “I haven’t done anything for myself in a while,” or we may create an illness that requires us to rest and play in order to heal. But we have the power to simply say, “I would love to do this, and so I will.” We do not need to rationalize, explain, or defend our self-nurturing to anyone. If an activity brings us peace and delight, that is reason enough.

Help me remember that my nature is love, and my birthright is happiness.

Life is my reason for celebration!

[bluidkiti]

December 23

Step by Step

Today, if all things out-live their purpose, useful or not, today I begin to discard what serves no use to me anymore. Today I have no use for the emotional and spiritual damage that probably was bred long before my alcoholism and reinforced by alcoholism. They serve no useful purpose and never did, and it’s time to put an end to the damage they – and I – have done. Understanding that drinking for me is a choice and I alone am responsible to the consequences of that choice, those consequences have become so costly that I no longer want to be responsible to them. Because AA is here for the taking, it is my choice to grab it just as strongly as it is my choice to reject drinking and the cycle of abuse to myself and everyone around me. Today, enough is more than enough, and my choice is to go with sobriety. My first step: admitting I am powerless. And our common journey continues. Step by Step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

PROMPT ADMISSION

Timeliness is best in all matters.

~ Hesiod ~

If we happened to be a certain NASA scientist, we know all about prompt admissions. A few years ago, when the Voyager spacecraft was sent into space to explore the planets of our solar system, something happened shortly after liftoff. One of the scientists noticed the path of the rocket was off by one ten-thousandth of a degree. It was a very small mistake, but unless the mistake was corrected early, it would multiply itself many times over.

Instead of hitting a target one billion miles away, the craft would miss the mark and the mission would fail. The mistake was corrected, and success was assured.

So it is with our daily inventory. We take prompt and immediate action so we can stay on target. Our target is our conscious contact with God.

When I stray off course, even slightly, I take prompt action to right myself. What appears at the moment to be a minor wrong can quickly grow and jeopardize my recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Hear me, four quarters of the world—a relative I am! Give me the strength to walk the soft earth, a relative to all that is! Give me the eyes to see and the strength to understand, that I may be like you. With your power only can I face the winds.

~ Black Elk ~

All of nature upholds us. It is inevitable that we face strong winds in our lives. These winds challenge us with losses, sadness, difficulties at our work, frightening dangers, and desires for things that only hurt us.

Our spiritual program teaches us that we are not alone. Nature surrounds us. Perhaps we have never considered that the bird sitting on the branch is our relative. It breathes air and has warm blood flowing through its veins just as we do. Even the tall tree we walk past each day is part of our family of life. These beings comfort us and can teach us about how to live. Does the fox in the field worry about what he will eat next week? No, he only hunts for what he needs today.

I will open myself to the whole family of life, to the lessons I can learn, and to the strength that it can give me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

It is a spiritual act to use your own eyes and ears and mind and heart to know the world in your way of knowing, to live in the world in your way of living.

~ Patricia Benson ~

The codependency we struggled with most of our lives kept us from using our own eyes and minds and hearts to see the world. Because we felt it was our job to take care of others’ feelings, we missed the opportunities to know and respect our own feelings and perspectives on the world.

Recovery is making it possible for us to know and live in our world, and what a gift that is! The Steps guide us to a clearer understanding of who we are, sponsors help us appraise our plans and actions, and our Higher Power offers us the strength, courage, and belief to do what we need to do.

We may always need reminders that seeing the world from where we stand is appropriate, healthy, and spiritual. Letting others have their own perspective is likewise appropriate. This program is designed to help us do both.

I will not let others take charge of how I see the events of my life today. I will rely on God to help me be true to my own vision.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am calming down

Before I got help for my anxiety, I used to feel frantic at times. I’d sit down, then get up. I’d pace. Down. Up. Pace. I couldn’t settle down. And I couldn’t stop thinking or worrying.

Things are better now. I’ve admitted my problem and I’m letting others help me (a caring therapist and a support group). I am learning that my problem includes fear of feelings and trying to avoid them. So, in a safe environment, with people who have problems like mine, I’m learning to accept my feelings and deal with them constructively. This helps me relax and I am grateful.

I will write down two coping techniques on a card and keep it handy for times of stress.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.

~ Proverbs 17:22 ~

During active addiction we didn’t laugh much. When we were living in that gray area between life and death everything was serious. Nothing was worth smiling about. As our addiction progressed we began to be suspicious and resentful of other people’s happiness. Life was such a serious business for us, and surely not a laughing matter.

In recovery we’re becoming healthy enough to laugh again. We’re getting enough rest, taking care of ourselves, and have found communion with a Higher Power. Suddenly we find how wonderful even a smile can feel. The old angers, fears, and anxieties are put in their proper perspective. We feel younger, more powerful, less burdened by the cares of the world. Now, it doesn’t take much effort to have fun. Our Twelve Step meetings are a harmonious mix of seriousness and laughter.

In a way it’s like coming home again to the child in us, coming home to joy and peace. A little laughter sure can do a lot.

Today help me to get back in touch with fun and laughter in my life.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

[Christmas] … seemed to be a trip across a minefield seeded with resurrected family feuds, exacerbated loneliness, emotional excess, and the inevitable disappointments that arise when expectations fall far short of reality.

~ Joyce Rebeta-Burditt ~

Celebration of the holidays can present gatherings where it is hard to avoid alcohol and the temptation to indulge. Use these tips to stay safe and sober.

Be sure to prepare yourself. Ask, “Am I in the right frame of mind to overcome any desire to drink?” If you are fraught with emotions or feeling stressed, avoid the party.

Stay away from the bar area so you will be less tempted by the sight of bottles and mixers. If alcoholic and nonalcoholic beverages are being served at the same location, ask a friend to get you a soda.

When you are offered a drink, simply say no. You do not need to give an explanation. If someone persists or hands you a drink, do not make a big deal about it. Give the drink to someone else or set it aside.

Have an exit strategy in place. Drive yourself or go with your sponsor or a trusted friend so you can leave whenever you feel nervous or uncomfortable.

Before I attend a party, I will come up with a plan to stay safe and sober.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

People disturb us. They sap our vitality from us. . . . They pile upon us their conditions of fear and their atmosphere of despondency. In such cases we must regain our poise by the realization of the power that is ever within us. Find your center.

~ Horatio W. Dresser `

Did we become wrapped up in the behaviors of other people today? If we haven’t detached from the problems of our boss, co-worker, or family member, we feel drained and used—like an old rag that’s choked with years of dust and dirt.

Other people own their behaviors just as we own ours. If we buy into someone’s attitude, then we have purchased a piece of that attitude. It’s ours to feel, and feel it we usually do. Suddenly we become a reflection of the other person, displaying whatever emotions he or she is experiencing.

Now that the daytime is over, we can reflect upon our feelings and ask if they are ours or ones we purchased from others. To find our center, we need to discover the feelings that are ours alone. As we interact with people, we can refuse to purchase any more attitudes that are not our own. 

I can detach from others and not buy their feelings. Tonight I will find much serenity from my own feelings.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Choosing wisely

We choose our activities. What we focus on manifests in our lives. If we opt to go to drinking or to pot parties or to socialize with practicing addicts, we are setting ourselves up for failure by re-creating our old environment.

If we choose to associate with people who are clean and sober and spiritually driven, then we are more likely to grow to be clean and sober and spiritual. Our Higher Power will show us the way by disclosing these activities to us.

Do I always choose wisely?

Higher Power, may I learn to choose the activities that lead to growth, not despair.

Today I will choose the good by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I was praying for rhinestones—when my Higher Power had diamonds in store for me!

~ WOMAN IN RECOVERY ~

Newcomer

I applied for something I’m really well qualified to do; it’s something I’ve wanted for a long time. I was rejected in favor of someone else. I don’t plan to relapse over this, but I’m angry and discouraged. It’s hard for me to feel generous toward the person who got what I wanted.

Sponsor

I’m sorry to hear of your disappointment. It sounds as if it was intensified by your competitive feelings with another person. Drinking, using drugs, overeating, or engaging in other addictive behaviors only compounds disappointment with feelings of shame and self-rejection.

Whether the context is work, school, community activity, or personal relationships, there are times when each of us has to deal with rejection. But if we value ourselves and our abilities and are not depending solely on someone else’s validation to make us feel worthwhile, we can detach from a rejection and move on. We know that there will be other, and perhaps more rewarding, opportunities for fulfillment at the right time. We trust that our spirit has a vision larger than the scope of what we can see today.

We can cope with our feelings of competition by praying sincerely that others will receive recognition and happiness. The love and generosity our prayers create in us will lighten our hearts.

Today, I recognize my own value and am confident in my Higher Power’s plan for me. I wholeheartedly celebrate others’ successes.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Every kind deed, every noble act pays off double. You get your first pay-off the instant you do it, provided, however, that you did not perform the act just for the pay-off. It will give you a bang that a shot or a goof-ball can’t approach.

The second pay-off comes later on, for no human action is exempt from repercussions. The world must eventually react to any act, good or bad, and the bread you cast upon the waters will be returned to you on some later tide.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Decide to be satisfied with any results your efforts may bring.

2) There are good days and great days. The good days are when everything goes your way and you don’t drink. The great days are when nothing goes your way and you don’t drink.

3) Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Speak Your Truth

Speak your truth.
Listen when others speak theirs too.
When you let go of fear, you will learn to love others

and you will let them love you.

Do not be afraid of dying.
But do not be afraid to live.
Ask yourself what that means.
Open your heart to love, for that is why you’re here.
And know that you are, and always have been,

One with God and all who live.

~ by Melody Beattie ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE LOST COROT

There is a quaint old legend that is firmly believed in the artists’ colony in Paris. It appears that many years ago a poor struggling artist was so hard up that he did not have even enough money to buy a piece of canvas upon which to paint what he felt sure would be a masterpiece. Going along the quays he saw an old daub selling for a few sous, frame included. It was supposed to represent Napoleon III in full dress uniform, and doubtless had adorned some wall in the days of the Second Empire. That artist decided that he could clean off the picture and use the canvas for his own work.

Arrived home, he proceeded to remove Napoleon III, not a difficult task, and to his astonishment found that there was another picture underneath. The last artist had not even removed the original but simply worked over it. When the last traces of Napoleon III had disappeared, the student was amazed to discover what looked to him like a very fine Corot. He promptly submitted his find to the experts and it was pronounced a genuine Corot. Of course, his days of poverty were ended.

Whether this story be truth or fable, it is a perfect allegory of the nature of man as we know him. Outside we find the “marred image” showing limitation, sin, sickness, and inharmony—the unskilled daub; but underneath is the masterwork of the Great Artist, and our prayers act by clearing away the false accretions—the “many inventions” of the carnal mind—that the already existing Truth and harmony may appear.

Lo, this only have I found, that God hath made man upright; but they have sought out many inventions (Ecclesiastes 7:29). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

H.A.L.T.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

~ Max Ehrmann, Desiderata ~

Twelve-step recovery programs have a valuable acronym to help during challenging times: Stop and nourish yourself when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired (H.A.L.T.). When we start to run on empty, we must heed the internal sensor that reminds us to take care of our needs; indeed, we are ineffective to ourselves and others unless we are fed physically, emotionally, and spiritually

I went through a period when I would become very irritable around 11 o’clock each morning. Unfortunately, I took out my vexation on my secretary; every day at that time I would become upset with her for a different reason. Finally, I discovered that my upset had nothing to do with her; my blood sugar had plummeted. I was not eating breakfast, and by that time of day, my energy level crashed. I began to eat a proper breakfast, and it was amazing how the quality of her work improved.

If you’ve been around young children when they’re tired, you know that they become cranky about everything. No matter what you say or do, it’s not good enough. Finally, the only reasonable response is, “I think you need a nap.” Even as adults, we are prone to irrational irritability when we’re overtired. At that point, it’s wise to step back and say, “I need to rest.” You will not be effective until you recharge your batteries.

When we act out of loneliness, we cause more problems than we solve. Loneliness is not a valid reason to have sex or create a relationship. When you feel lonely, instead of trying to find a fix to fill yourself, reach out to a friend and communicate. Acknowledge that you feel lonely, and look the feeling squarely in the eye. As you examine the course of events and feelings that led to the loneliness, you will find healthy ways out of it.

Become a healthy parent to yourself. Give yourself the nurturing you need, and you will be able to be there for others.

Help me to love myself enough to take care of myself.

I feed my spirit. I give life because I am whole.

[bluidkiti]

December 24

Step by Step

Today, Christmas Eve, I have no need, desire or excuse to take part of the holiday’s liquid cheer because I am here despite or in spite of it all, and my choice today is to retain or begin my sobriety. If I still have family and friends to be with this holiday season, I will not sabotage it by drinking even one gulp. If I am alone, it is because I have allowed it and shut out the support of meeting houses, others in recovery or those who need help getting there. Today is not a day for selfishness, and I will not empower it with self-pity, anger, mourning and regret if they are what my drinking spawned. Instead, I will be grateful that I simply am and have the potential to sober up, grow in it and, in some way, regain what I might have lost and keep what I haven’t. Today, I haven’t got time for the bittersweet of the season, only the promise of the sweet. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

We must so live that, when it comes time to die, even the undertaker is sorry.

~ MARK TWAIN ~

When I first came to Nicotine Anonymous, a Promise was read to me that I will realize I haven’t given up anything at all.

I did not believe this as I knew I was giving up something huge. I was quitting because I knew if I kept doing the crime that eventually I was going to have to do the time. 1 did not want to do time with cancer, heart disease, emphysema, so it was worth giving up my little friends.

In fact they were not my friends. I have gained so much by getting freedom from addiction and I now know the Promises are true. I was slowing dying. Now I am living.

Today, I will pause and give thanks for the realization of the Promises in my life.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

HOLIDAYS

Keep your recovery First to make it Last.

~ Anonymous ~

We all encounter places, people, and times of the year which trigger memories of our old lifestyle, pleasant or painful events. Holidays and family gatherings may be especially stressful times for us.

There have always been a lot of expectations associated with holidays. Many of us may feel pressured to fulfill those expectations. We need to remember that it is a naturally stressful time and we may feel more nervous than usual. We can avoid forcing moods or events on ourselves or those around us.

In recovery, we are given tips that have helped many members during the holidays. We plan extra Program activities and keep our phone list handy. We skip any slippery occasions that make us uneasy. We attend special Program events. We take a fellow member with us to a possibly slippery party if we feel uncomfortable going alone.

When I keep my recovery Number One in my mind, the holidays, with the help of my friends, will be enjoyable and less stressful

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.

~ Winston Churchill ~

As we grow spiritually, we naturally become more generous. It’s a quality of a well-developed person. Rather than being anxious over whether we will have enough— and rather than hungrily seeking more and more—we become more openhearted. We feel more abundant within ourselves and find that our spirit of generosity even adds to our own abundant feelings. Where we see a need, we help out.

A generous person doesn’t need to shower others with material gifts. The most precious gifts are things such as paying attention to others, respecting them for who they are, and giving our time. Often a material gift is a symbol of the good feelings in a relationship. In our generosity, we also learn to receive others’ gifts to us with humility and respect.

Today I take pleasure in my spirit of generosity.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

God’s gifts are slowly revealed.

~ Michele Fedderly ~

We are so certain about what we need and when we need it that we become anxious and agitated. Patience is a virtue, we know, but we’re not moved to practice it when an outcome in our lives is at stake.

How fortunate that we have the gift of hindsight. The impatience we feel now is not unlike what we’ve felt thousands of times, yet God has never let us down. We may not have gotten exactly what matched our will, but we see now that God had many gifts in store for us. In every case they were right for us, even though we may have resisted them at first.

When we are in pain we think God has forgotten us. On the contrary, our pain is often caused by not acknowledging the direction God is trying to give us. At the right time, in the right place, the right gift or direction will always be offered. Let’s remember that and be grateful.

God’s gifts are revealed when the time is right. Today I do not travel this path alone.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I miss my family

Before I got clean and sober and stable, I avoided my family—parents, brothers, and sisters. I was afraid of what they would say to me about my drug use or about my mental health issues. I was in denial. I was protecting myself and I know I hurt them (and hurt myself as well).

These days, I realize how much I miss them. Of course, I want them to see how much better I am. But most of all, I want to ask them for their forgiveness—as well as their support. I need my family back.

I will ask my therapist to help me reconnect with my family.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

He loseth nothing that loseth not God.

~ George Herbert ~

When we let God’s will guide our lives we gain a profound ally in recovery. We realize that statements like, “I have to,” “I should,” or “You must,” are a setup for anger, resentment, or disappointment.

Although all the “shoulds” in our lives have made us unhappy, true belief in God doesn’t happen overnight. We have all heard someone say, “I go to meetings and read the Steps, but God still doesn’t do what I want.” We want to turn over our will, but not if it means turning over our lives, not if it means we can’t determine the outcome, as if we ever could.

In time, however, we learn in our bones that we can’t enter belief until we remove the guard from the gate, until we relinquish control. Then God takes over. And then our trust frees us from the need to control. Trust opens our hearts to new feelings of love. And gives us peace of mind.

Today help me turn it over. Help me let go and let God.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

When a man meets an obstacle he can’t destroy, he destroys himself.

~ Ryszard Kapuscinski ~

Stress can have damaging effects on your health, your relationships, and your outlook on life. Knowing how to identify and handle stress can alleviate its effects and help you better manage it. External stress happens around you and can be difficult to avoid because it is often out of your control. You cannot make your work environment less busy, escape a traffic jam or crowded mall, or avoid those in your life who are emotional time bombs.

The other kind of stress happens inside you in how you respond to your work environment, traffic jams, crowds, or difficult people. You can also create stress whenever you obsess about memories of the past, focus on your fears, are overly worried and anxious, or try to control things that are out of your control.

Whenever you are feeling stressed, first take a moment and just breathe. Then think about what you can do to alleviate the stress you are feeling. You can walk away from the situation, shift your focus onto something else, or accept that what is happening is temporary and will pass.

I will change the way I respond to stress so I can approach things in a more relaxed frame of mind.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

If time be of all things most precious, wasting time must be the greatest prodigality, since lost time is never found again.

~ Benjamin Franklin ~

At the beginning of a day we may feel we have so much time ahead of us. But now as we look back on the day, we may feel we never had enough time to do all the things we wanted. Here we are now, ready to say good night to the day, and not satisfied that we did all we wanted to or could do.

Perhaps the day didn’t go as we had planned. Per-haps the list of things we wanted to accomplish barely got touched. Perhaps we feel we wasted a great deal of time watching television, shopping, or talking on the telephone.

If we believe now we wasted time today, then we’ll view that time as useless. But if we view all of the moments of today as precious and necessary, then we won’t feel so critical of how we spent our time. We did what we wanted to do today, in the time we were given. Tonight we can rest—assured—that none of our time was wasted.

I’m satisfied all of my time today was valuable and useful, even if I didn’t accomplish everything I set out to do.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Accepting help

We sometimes find it difficult to accept any-thing from other people. We don’t want to be obligated to them for love, money, or support. We don’t want to feel we owe them something in return. We need to remember that all help comes from our Higher Power and that our Higher Power sometimes reaches us through other people. Knowing this empowers us to accept help graciously.

As long as we remain true to our spiritual-ity, all things are right. It’s only when we deviate from our true purpose that we make mistakes in accepting things. God loves us and will provide all things if we remain true to God’s purpose.

Have I learned to accept help from others?

Higher Power, I want to accept all gifts sent to me through you, be they mental, emotional, or material.

Today I will help

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

You have to sniff out joy, keep your nose to the joy-trail.

~ BUFFY SAINTE-MARIE ~

Newcomer

I heard an old-timer say, “You can be right, or you can be happy.” What does that mean? When something is wrong, am I supposed to deny what I can see with my own eyes?

Sponsor

This program saying is not meant to encourage stupidity or moral laziness. It’s an affectionate way of suggesting that when we obsess about our own point of view or insist on having our own way, we may have our priorities mixed up. It suggests that we be open-minded and tolerant of people with whom we may disagree. It reminds us that self-will is not the path to serenity.

It also suggests that we have a choice about where to focus our mental energies. There is nothing wrong with having our own particular point of view and confidently and persuasively expressing it—that’s part of our self- esteem. But we don’t have to win arguments and attempt to force people and situations to conform to our own ideas. We can detach from argument, instead of reacting. We can experience the peace that comes from letting go, as we cultivate mental relaxation and serenity as tools of our recovery.

Today, I don’t have to be right. I’m happy, as I live and let live.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Did you ever think upon forgiveness as a Christmas Gift? In addition to its sacred application, the giving of gifts at Christmas is to bring happiness to someone and nothing can bring more happiness than forgiveness. It gives joy both to the giver and the receiver and must also bring a smile to the face of Him who said “it is more blessed to give than to receive.” It depletes your purse not one penny but adds materially to spiritual wealth.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Al-Anon: Letting go is not caring for, but caring about.

2) Drink(ing,): Getting drunk interferes with our drinking.

3) Heal(ing): When the pain is of no more value, the healing is instantaneous.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Be Patient with Everyone

Be patient with everyone, but above all with yourself . . . do not be disappointed by your imperfections, but always rise up with fresh courage. How are you to be patient in dealing with your neighbor’s faults if you are impatient in dealing with your own? They who are worried by their own shortcomings will not correct them. All positive progress comes from a calm and peaceful mind.

~ From writings by St. Francis de Sales ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

VITAL FAITH

Read Psalm 46.

Among all the beautiful and heart-searching prayers of the Bible there is none that surpasses the wonderful poem that we call the Forty-sixth Psalm.

It begins, as do nearly all the Bible prayers, with an expression of faith in God. This is extremely important in practice. You need to affirm constantly that you do believe in God, not merely as a vague abstract concept, but as a real, vivid, actual power in life, always available to be contacted in thought; never-changing and never-failing. The Psalm closes with a command and an affirmation.

Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. This is really the whole Bible in a nutshell. Be still, and know that I am God. This is the very last thing that we want to do when we are worried or anxious. The current of human thought is always hurrying us along to its own ends, and it seems much easier to swim with it by accepting difficulties, than to draw resolutely away from these things, and contemplate God, which is the one way out of trouble. Even in your prayers there is a time to cease active work and, “having done all, to stand”—to be still, and know that I am God. 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Let Your Dreams Come Through

Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.

~ J.P. McEvoy ~

In our society, we place a high value on getting things done, but we often overlook where the ideas for things come from. For every great invention, piece of drama, music, art, medical break–through, or social innovation, there was a person who dreamed a dream. Descartes, considered the father of modern science, came upon the scientific method in a vision he had under a high fever. President Kennedy envisioned a Peace Corps and established the country’s goal to put a man on the moon by the end of the 1960s. The great Egyptian statesman Anwar Sadat declared, “You’re not a realist unless you believe in miracles.”

Visioning is as important as doing, perhaps more so. Sitting quietly for 20 minutes a day and letting your mind play with possibilities will net you far greater results than 8 hours of work without a vision behind it. While it is fruitless to fantasize without also working to put your dreams into action, the process of fantasizing gives space and breadth for your mind to explore realms that you would not touch if you simply followed the rational thought process. Then when you act, you will be inspired and guided by ideas that proceed from the divine wisdom within you.

Psychologist Patricia Sun suggests that “children should not be punished for daydreaming in school; to the contrary, they would be happier and far more effective students if a period of time was set aside each day specifically for daydreaming.”

Give yourself permission to surf on the sea of imagination. Visualize and record your most inspiring and outrageous thoughts. Choose the most exciting ones, and then set about the business of letting your dreams come through.

Show me the value of my dreams. I pray to follow my visions until they are a reality.

I trust my dreams enough to bring them to life.

[bluidkiti]

December 25

Step by Step

“If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were sufficient to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such codes and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasn’t there. Our human resources, as marshaled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly.

“Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 4 (“We Agnostics”), pp 44-5.

Today, let me not blame my alcoholism on some moral failure on my part or a philosophy that did not apply to me and, instead, take it for what it is – a physical, emotional, and spiritual disease of my character. While I should not and cannot be blamed for becoming alcoholic, I can and should be responsible for my recovery. To this end, I must completely accept the First Step of absolute powerlessness over alcohol and, then, at least come to believe in something – a Power – greater and stronger than myself. But if I still grapple with this concept, perhaps my power can be my own experience of predictable behavior and outcomes, most of which carried increasingly heavier consequences. Today, I am an alcoholic not because of a moral or philosophical failure on my part, but because of a disease. It cannot be cured, but it can be arrested. The program’s first two steps are my beginning. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

Time is the longest distance between two places.

~ TENNESSEE WILLIAMS ~

How many New Year’s resolutions came and went until I finally found Nicotine Anonymous? How many quit dates passed? Birthdays, holidays, Mondays, any days until I was ready to be willing, until I watched people who had what I wanted, freedom from nicotine, I could not get freed of this powerful addiction.

And what I heard at meetings was not about not giving up nicotine forever. Instead I heard about just not feeding my addiction “one day at a time.” This was a totally new approach for me, and it seemed much more attractive and manageable than forever. It still does after celebrating five years free. I am so grateful for this Program, “one day at a time.”

“Just for today,” I choose not to use nicotine. I will worry about tomorrow some other time.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

PROMISES

A promise made is a debt unpaid.

~ Robert W. Service ~

We often hear about and read the Promises. As we finish reading the list of rewards, we come upon a sentence that asserts that all these promises will materialize if we, who are looking for spiritual growth, work for the rewards. We can direct our efforts carefully by knowing what is happening and by being among those who are making things happen.

Thus, we discover that none of the Promises bring us outright gifts. They must actually not even be anticipated or expected. We who are looking for promised things are actually our own solution. The rewards are accepted with humility and gratefulness. We must always believe that we have earned the promised results.

The natural growth I experience in all the events of life arrive with a focus on spiritual growth. Gifts come in their natural time and cannot be rushed or postponed, but I must always work for them.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The miracle is this—the more we share, the more we have.

~ Leonard Nimoy ~

Look around you at the happiest people you know. They are also the most generous and giving people. A generous spirit creates its own environment. In recovery we talk a lot about gratitude—and we have a lot to be grateful for. This feeling of gratitude inspires us to be generous toward others in many different ways. Most sharing is not of material things but a sharing of our spirit, our forgiveness, and our respect for others.

We can cultivate a generous spirit by reminding ourselves that we have enough. We have enough to live well, we are surrounded by love, we have been forgiven for many wrongs that we committed, and life is filled with interesting adventure. When we share from this sense of abundance, our feeling of well-being only grows.

Today I will be generous and sharing toward the other people I come into contact with.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I don’t have to believe in the same things that my loved ones believe in, in order to love them.

~ Karen Davis ~

One of the most valuable gifts we can receive from this program is learning how to let go of other people. Giving up our struggle to control how friends and family members think and behave and feel will bless us with an exhilarating freedom.

Most of us never realized we could let others live their own lives. We sincerely thought we needed to help others see life as we saw it. Certainty that we were right in all matters was part of our disease. Letting others be themselves meant we weren’t in control.

We’ve come to understand that, in fact, we aren’t in control and never were. But now we are glad for that understanding. Now we are free to spend our time on creative pursuits that please us rather than spinning our wheels trying to make people follow us. We each have a path to follow, and we are growing in our gratitude for that realization.

I may want my loved ones to think like me, but I will let them make their own choices today. Really loving them means really letting them go.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have hope

Dealing with a psychiatric illness, my life felt painful, confused, and out of control. Dealing with an addiction at the same time was harder still: what I took for a solution to my mental pain only turned out to make things worse. In time I lost faith in myself.

But my friends did not. Eventually they helped me to see my serious problems and later to get treatment for them. Soon I felt I had a chance. Soon I believed I could change. With all the help I’d been given, I felt hope, and my faith began to return.

In my prayers today I will ask for the willingness to change and be changed.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We are always given exactly what we need according to a plan so grand and good that it is beyond our imagination.

~ Alice Muir ~

At some point in our recovery we turn our lives over to the care of a Power greater than ourselves. This does not come easy. We approach that point with fear and trepidation. Sometimes we turn our life over and then take it back when things get tough. We fight, endlessly it seems, to avoid letting go.

In the end we find we are not fighting anything or anyone other than ourselves. We find that our Higher Power has been with us all the time. All-knowing and all-forgiving, God never deserted us even when we were desperate to reject Him. Perhaps that is the beauty of the program: we discover that our Higher Power loves us unconditionally until we are ready to begin loving ourselves and others once again. And then, no matter what mistakes we make, He is ready to forgive us when we ask. This comfort was available to us all along. We just couldn’t see it, as we can’t see God’s plan for us — but we know it’s there.

Today I am grateful for my Higher Power and the spirituality of recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Christmas is for children. But it is for grown-ups too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts.

~ Lenora Mattingly Weber ~

Spending time with family over the holidays can make you realize how powerful the messages and memories of your childhood are. Indeed, you may discover that how you define yourself today has a lot to do with your past—and not always in the best of ways.

Rather than stay entrenched in the negative influences from your childhood, you can let go of your attachment to the past by changing your outlook today. Even if you choose to obsess about your past, punish yourself for it, or feel extreme guilt or remorse over it, there is nothing you can do about it now It is over. Tell yourself this repeatedly.

Rather than hold onto regrets about the past—what you did or did not do, what was right or wrong, or what could have been or might have been better—forgive yourself and focus on what you can do now. Most people cling to people, places, or things not because such things are good for them, but because they are most familiar. You can become comfortable with new people, places, and things when you give them a chance.

Today I will release the hold the past has upon my present,

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When you feel grateful for something others have done for you, why not tell them about it?

~ Anonymous ~

It’s one thing to express gratitude for the many wonderful things in our lives, whether we do so in our prayers or to our group. But to go one step further and express gratitude directly to the people who help us feel grateful is one of the best ways to show love and kindness.

Our direct contacts with others don’t always need to be in making amends. Recognition of the gifts we receive builds a strong bridge that can continually transport positive, loving feelings.

We can enlarge the one-way avenue toward us into a two-lane road that returns to the ones who show us so much patience, kindness, and love. Once we do, we’ll find we want to travel this road often, both to receive and to give thanks for what we receive.

Is there someone to whom I can express my gratitude? I need to take time for a prayer of gratitude for the wonderful gifts I have received. 

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Accepting gifts

Giving is part of the holiday spirit. We need not lament because we don’t understand the nature of giving. Many of us suffer on this day for reasons a little more subtle than usual. Though we don’t realize it, many of us feel inadequate to the holiday spirit, which is so incredibly magnificent. We need to allow ourselves to dwell in this magnificence.

We are all children of our Higher Power. We can joyfully accept its gifts of love, peace, fellowship, sobriety, and cleanness. We will learn how to give in turn.

Do I feel the spirit of the holidays?

Thank you, Higher Power, for your gifts to me today and every day.

Today I will share in the holiday spirit by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

What is actual is actual only for one time
And only for one place.

~ T. S. ELIOT ~

Newcomer

I spoke at a meeting last night, but I don’t feel as if I said much of anything. I feel depressed about it today.

Sponsor

Whatever took place at that meeting, it’s now part of the past. In the Serenity Prayer we ask our Higher Power to help us accept the things we can’t change. Among the things we can’t change are events that have already taken place, whether twenty years ago or just yesterday.

You’ll have many more opportunities to speak at meetings as recovery continues. My own experience is that each time I speak is a little different. Sometimes I feel fluent, confident, and in control of my words; sometimes I feel forgetful and shy, or even a bit blank. I’ve learned to try not to judge my talk as if it were a performance, but to regard it as an offering. My speaking provided a necessary ingredient that kept the meeting going for others (in addition to getting me there).
Whatever I say, something will have relevance for someone in the room; it always happens. That’s something I can’t plan or control; it’s part of the flow of things.

Today, I let go of the habit of rating my past performance.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Optimist/pessimist: The pessimist sees only the tunnel. The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel.

2) Simple: Keep it Simple. Breath in; breath out; don’t drink or drug in between breaths.

3) Working with Others: Get it, give it, grow in it

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Four Absolutes

Absolute Honesty

Both with ourselves and with others, in word, deed, and thought.

Absolute Unselfishness

To be willing, wherever possible, to help others who need our help.

Absolute Love

You shall love the Lord with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. And . . . you shall love your neighbor as yourself.

Absolute Purity

Purity of mind, of body, and of purpose.

~ by the Oxford Group; used by early AAs before the Twelve Steps were written ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

BLESSING AND CURSING

Life is a reflex of mental states. As far as you are concerned, the character that things will bear will be the character that you first impress upon them. Bless a thing and it will bless you. Curse it and it will curse you. If you put your condemnation upon anything in life, it will hit back at you and hurt you. If you bless any situation, it has no power to hurt you, and even if it is troublesome for a time it will gradually fade out.

Bless your body. If there is anything wrong with a particular organ, bless that organ. Bless your home. Bless your business. Bless your associates. Turn any seeming enemies into friends by blessing them. Bless the climate. Bless the town, and the state, and the country.

Bless a thing and it will bless you.

So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper m the thing whereto I sent it (Isaiah 55:11). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

The Light Has Come

Christ’s eyes are open, and He will look on whatever you see with love if you accept His vision as yours.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Today is a precious and holy day on Planet Earth. It is a day when the world calls a halt to insanity and acknowledges the presence of divinity. It is a day of joy and appreciation and celebration. It is a day to be happy.

The birth of the Christ as a human being bears tremendous metaphysical import. It means that humanity is ready to accept its own divinity. Jesus brought God to Earth; he discovered his divine identity, he had the courage to live it, and the world has never been the same.

The image of Christ being born in a manger symbolizes that God comes forth in a place of humility. Spirit seeks not fanfare, human riches, or accolades, but the simplicity of an open heart.

The most important message of Christmas is that the Christ is born in you, through you, as you. When interpreting a dream, we must recognize ourselves as all the characters; the same is true for events that occur in the outer dream we call life. The birth of Christ is the emergence of a new consciousness of your own holiness.

Today is your birthday, and every day is Christmas. Thank God that you have remembered your divine nature. Throw off the cloak of smallness, and claim the truth about you: You are an expression of a perfect God, and everything God is, you are. You are the holy one. Jesus seeks not our worship, but our equality. He is our elder brother who came to remind us who we really are. We are one with the son of God.

Thank You for bringing Jesus to life, that I may walk the path of divinity with him.

Christ is born in me today.

[bluidkiti]

December 26

Step by Step

“When I try to reconstruct what my life was ‘before,’ I see a coin with two faces.
“One, the side I turned to myself and the world, was respectable …

“The other side …was sinister, baffling. I was inwardly unhappy most of the time. There would be times when the life of respectability and achievement seemed insufferably dull – I had to break out. This I would do by going completely ‘bohemian’ for a night, getting drunk and rolling home with the dawn. Next day remorse would be on me like a tiger. I’d claw my way back to ‘respectability’ and stay there – until the inevitable next time.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Stopped in Time,” Ch 16 (“Me an Alcoholic?”), p 432.

Today, faith and security in recovery to know that there does not have to be “the inevitable next time.” AA encourages us to live in the solution of sobriety and not in the problem of alcoholism, and I am in the latter if my focus is on fighting off “the inevitable next time.” The threat of a “next time” is weakened if I practice with diligence and integrity the program’s steps and principles and accept intuitively that drinking now, for me, is a choice and that I will be held responsible to the consequences of that choice. Today, “the inevitable next time” may be less so if I stick to the program and the understanding that I have a choice and the choice I make will have consequences. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.

~ WILLIAM CONNOR MAGEE ~

As a newcomer I was so terrified of what Nicotine Anonymous members would think of me if I “did something wrong.” But no matter what I did or said, all they had in response was a warm, friendly, “keep coming back.”

I keep myself miserable by my fear of making mistakes. Since I have learned to love myself, right or wrong, I make a lot more mistakes than ever before, and I have a lot more successes.

Today, I know that I never fail when I give my best effort.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ABILITY

We came to the Program to stop our addiction. What we found was a way to start living.

~ Anonymous ~

We all have within ourselves the ability to maintain recovery. To begin with, all that was needed was a desire to stop. Most of us, before admitting our powerlessness, were possessed by the fear that we were helpless and hopeless. We had tried to quit many times and always failed.

For years, addictions were considered the stamp of doom. It was true that addicts were incurable, but wise men and women kept crying out that obsessions could be arrested. The ability to keep winning is within all of us who have faith and belief that we can. Recovery is a constant challenge for us all. Those who accept the challenge have discovered that the Program is simple, but not always easy. Ability always follows surrender to reality.

With the strength provided by the Fellowship, my sponsor, and my Higher Power, I know I have the ability to maintain recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect he becomes an adolescent; the day he forgives them he becomes an adult; the day he forgives himself he becomes wise.

~ Alden Nowlan ~

Facing up to our wrongs is a foundation stone in our recovery. We have been contending with imperfection since the day we were born, both in ourselves and in others. Forgiveness is central to this whole process. When we admit that we have made a mistake, we affirm our belief in our values at the same time. Nothing is more honorable than saying that we hold a value and admitting that we fell short of it. That guilt is the pathway back to repair and forgiveness.

Shame is a dead-end emotion in which forgiveness doesn’t seem possible. In our recovery we are turning shame into guilt, making repair where it is possible and accepting forgiveness or forgiving ourselves. For many men, accepting forgiveness from ourselves or others is the hardest thing to do. It takes true humility to receive forgiveness because we are admitting that we are imperfect like everyone else; to defy the forgiveness that is available to us is arrogant.

Today I will try to forgive myself for the ways I have violated my own values.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We need to let the old go, so the new can emerge.

~ Peggy Bassett ~

When we first entered the program, we heard the saying “One door must close before another can open.” That baffled us, even while it gave us comfort. It helped that women we looked up to found solace in the slogan. Their experiences, shared in the meetings, taught us understanding. Each time we fought against a changing condition, someone we admired was able to remind us of its value.

Now we are the truth-bearers for the newcomers. Over time we have come to believe that every experience has special meaning. When something new begins to tap us on the shoulder, that’s our cue to let something else go. Newcomers need our demonstration of how it works. No doubt, before this day or this week has passed, we’ll each have an opportunity to close one door and open another. Let’s make sure we share what we learn with someone else.

I am someone’s teacher today. I will not fight circumstances that are changing, but accept that their passing is my opportunity.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I don’t have to go it alone

I had no idea how much emotional and spiritual pain I was in. I knew I felt depressed about my life—and I knew I was staying high a lot of the time—but I couldn’t see my basic problems. I was just trying to manage on my own despite the problems the drugs were causing at work and at home.

One day I woke up and realized I could no longer manage on my own—I admitted to myself that between drugs and my moods, I had a serious problem. Later, I admitted it to a trusted friend. After a period of painful soul- searching, eventually I found a Twelve Step meeting, then a therapist, and finally a sponsor. Together, they have changed my life. In recovery, I have found relief. I will no longer go it alone.

This week I will thank my helpers and I will practice being open about my feelings.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I am only one, but still I am one.
I cannot do everything, but still I can do something;
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.

~ Edward Everett Hale ~

We once heard someone say, “Knowing doesn’t keep you sober, doing does.” We got the point. Our actions, not strictly our knowledge, will help us stay sober.
Recovery is a program of action, of doing something that will contribute to our recovery today.

All the knowledge in the world won’t help us recover if we don’t use what we’ve learned. Like good intentions, knowledge is only the beginning. Next, we must do — and not do — the things we’ve learned will help us make progress in recovery.

It’s up to us to put the Steps to work in our lives today. We are responsible for eating right and exercising, going to meetings, finding a Higher Power, and praying or meditating to continually strengthen our spiritual lives.

Knowing what we must do is a good first step. Putting that knowledge into action, one day at a time, will bring us the joys of real recovery and a new life.

Today I pray that, through Your power, I have what I need to take action for my recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We have no right to ask when sorrow comes, “Why did this happen to me?” unless we ask the same question for every moment of happiness that comes our way.

~ Author unknown ~

A millionaire wanted his son to understand that the world was made up of those who had great happiness in the world because they never wanted for anything, and those who lived in unhappiness because their struggles were never-ending. He asked one of his lowest-paid workers if his son could stay for a weekend, and the employee agreed.

When the weekend was over, the millionaire picked up his son. On the way home he asked his son, “What did you learn about how others live?”

“A lot,” the boy replied as he sat with his shoulders slumped. “We have a dog, but they have three dogs and a couple of cats. They even have chickens and ducks and a donkey. We have a swimming pool, but they have this great big lake. We have a deck, but they have a back yard that stretches for miles and miles. And at dinner, they all sit around a table and laugh and talk together.”

The millionaire sat in silence, listening to his son.

“I guess the lesson I learned, Dad, is how poor we really are.”

Rather than rue what I do not have, I will be happy for all that I have been given.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Without prayer, I should have been a lunatic long ago.

~ Mahatma Gandhi ~

How can we make our prayers more satisfying and fulfilling? One of the best ways is to see and hear ourselves as we pray, as if we were getting a bird’s-eye view of what we look like and how we sound when we pray.

Seeing from above in this objective way gives a good overview of the strength and the meaning of our prayers. Are we whining and fidgeting as we pray? Maybe we aren’t really praying but instead are asking to get our way. Do we sound angry, with fists clenched? Maybe we need to work on letting go first before we pray.

This is how our Higher Power sees and hears us. Our Higher Power know which prayers are serious, meaningful conversations and which are filled with self-pity, resentment, and anger. Tonight we can hear ourselves pray and learn whether we are truly praying or merely taking time for self-centered feelings.

Before I pray tonight, let me run through the things I want to say. Help me keep self-centered feelings at a minimum and true sharing and communication at a maximum.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Working today

As we approach a new year, many of us feel fear. We look back on the past and worry about the future. But if we remember we only have today, we can work to make that future better. We have found true friends in our fellowship, and this is a time to be with them.

Am I ensuring a fruitful future by working with all I’ve got today?

Higher Power, I pray for guidance for today and for freedom from worry about tomorrow.

Today I will work for the fellowship by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The most exhausting thing in life is being insincere.

~ ANNE MORROW LINDBERGH ~

Newcomer

I heard someone sharing about a rather extreme situation. She complained that no one had time to listen to her. I gave her my phone number, and at first, I didn’t mind the calls. But every time I suggested a meeting or program tool, she objected: she’d tried everything and had a complaint about everyone. She calls every day now, and I’m always the one to end the conversation. It’s too much for me, but I don’t want to let her down—she’s had too many disappointments.

Sponsor

Our desire to be helpful sometimes backfires. When we’re motivated by a need to rescue people, we may present our-selves as more available and able to give help than we really are. When I find that I’m more concerned about someone’s growth in recovery than he himself is, I know I’ve gone beyond the boundaries of appropriate program support.

Part of my work in recovery is learning to accept my limitations. Though some people in the fellowship present their problems to be solved, I recognize that I cannot provide solutions; I can only listen and offer support as others go through the process of finding their own solutions. If people aren’t using the tools of the program, offering myself as a substitute actually hinders their recovery. This practice is called “enabling” because it allows others to keep on repeating addictive patterns without challenging themselves. Honesty demands that we withdraw from enabling situations. Recognizing our limits and acknowledging them is essential.

Today, I don’t block others in their search for solutions by trying to be the solution.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

As we alcoholics are selfish by nature it is but right and proper that, we should be more severe in our judgments of ourselves than of others. As we are our own best friend or our worst enemy, depending upon our treatment of ourselves, and as we are the one person in the world from whom we cannot escape, it is therefore essential that we do not allow ourselves to get away with anything in our treatment of ourselves. When we forgive ourselves we are rationalizing, but to forgive others is divine.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) MISQUOTED SLOGANS: Oozie does it.

2) Al-Anon: Mind Your Own Business

3) Drink(ing,): Go to enough meetings and you still may not stop drinking; your drinking, however, will be ruined.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Always Remember

There is no growth without pain (pain is not optional), so hurt a little bit.

There is no laughter without tears, so cry often. (Don’t be ashamed to cry, for if you don’t, you will be ever secure but always lonely.)

There is no peace without first knowing turmoil in the soul, so be at war with yourself sometimes.

There is no grace without first wrestling with guilt. If you are wrestling, let God’s grace surround you and give you new life.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE SEVEN-DAY MENTAL DIET

The subject of diet is one of the foremost topics of the present day in public interest. Newspapers and magazines teem with articles and book shops are filled with volumes unfolding the mysteries of proteins and vitamins. Experts are saying that you become the thing you eat. This is perfectly true, as far as it goes, but I am going to deal with the subject of dieting at a level infinitely more profound and far-reaching in its effects—mental dieting.

The food you furnish your mind determines the character of your life. The subjects that you allow your mind to dwell upon, make your surroundings what they are. As thy days, so shall thy strength be (Deuteronomy 33:25), which in modern language may be translated “as thy thoughts so shall thy life be.”

Everything in your life today—the state of your body, the state of your fortune, the state of your home, the present condition of every phase of your life—is entirely conditioned by the habitual tone of your past thinking. And the condition of your life next week, and next year, will be conditioned by the thoughts and feelings that you entertain from now onward. In other words, you choose your life. 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

God Is in Charge

Better to rely on one powerful king than on many little princes.

~ Jean de La Fontaine ~

After my apartment tenant left on short notice, I was not having success in finding a suitable replacement. Several prospective tenants answered my ad, but I did not feel 100 percent good about any of them. When the last day of the month came, I worried that I would have no tenant for the next month. That day, I received a call from an old friend who had moved back into town and wanted a place to live. She moved in the next day, and there was no loss at all, with a perfect continuity of right tenancy and a steady flow of income.

it appears that we must depend on ourselves and others to make everything turn out right, in the long run God is in charge. The people we deal with are simply agents of the King, and at any moment the King can issue orders to make things turn out in our favor.

For a long time, I believed that I had to manipulate people and influence individuals in positions of power to get what I wanted. Now I recognize that it is not people I need to impress; I just need to remember the presence of God as the Source.

Although the world would have us believe in separation, there is one power behind the scenes. If you are not having success through the human channels, go directly to the Source through prayer, affirmation, positive thinking, speaking, and acting. Your relationship with Spirit is the key factor in any situation.

Source of all good, walk with me today. Help me to lift my eyes above people and discover Your hand in all.

I walk forward in trust and confidence. God is my Source.

[bluidkiti]

December 27

Step by Step

Today, the first word in hopelessness is hope; the first word in helplessness is help; the first word in senselessness is sense; the first word in powerlessness is power. Within insanity is sanity; within fear, fearlessness; within pain, strength; within anger, reconciliation. This is our Program: from hopelessness to hope; from helplessness, help; from senselessness, sense; from powerlessness, power; from insanity, sanity; from fear, courage; from pain, strength; from anger, forgiveness. And from them – recovery. It’s that simple. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

The best way to escape from your problem is to solve it.

~ ROBERT ANTHONY ~

Relationships challenge me. For years I have isolated myself from others, although I was not too aware that I did. I even appeared smooth and lively, at times the life of the party.

Inside, I was often dying to escape, to get away from all these people. An inner pressure would build up in me that made me just want to run away to be alone. Lately, that inner pressure seems less extreme. When it is building up, I try to stop my thoughts and figure out what is bothering me. If I am honest, I can usually find the source of my tension. Just recognizing the real problem seems to reduce its power for me.

If I am uncomfortable at this moment, do not be concerned. In a little while I will be okay. If I use nicotine, I will not be any better off, but I may well wind up enslaved again for the rest of my days.

I may push people away from me just because I want them so much I cannot stand the tension. I may want their approval, or fear their anger, or need their attention.

Today, if I feel pressure, I will stop and determine the source of my discomfort. Then I will he prepared to address that need.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

RELATIONSHIPS

Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new.

~ Ursula K. LeGuin ~

We all probably believe our recovery Program will give us new chances to form relationships. This maybe frightening to us because our experience with intimate friendships has been pretty rocky. They have been a source of much pain and misery for many of us. We have only to look around to see that for most people relationships are not easy.

When we work our Steps, we discover how much shame, guilt, pity, and anger we had for ourselves and our partners. We had invested enormous amounts of time, energy, and personal resources in those relationships. The Program has revealed a need to completely overhaul our attitudes about intimate and personal relations.

The Program has helped me be a better partner in a relationship. Most of the time I never really needed better partners. I just needed to be a better person.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

One of the goals of spiritual practice is to make conscious what was previously unconscious.

~ Dan Millman ~

We find as we proceed with our recovery that commitment to honesty reveals more to ourselves than to anyone else. We begin by taking the advice of our program to be honest with others as well as ourselves. To our surprise, we realize how much we had hidden from even ourselves. It’s called denial. We sincerely missed seeing the elephant that was walking around in the living room. We honestly didn’t see what we didn’t want to see.

Spiritual practice teaches us to yield to the guidance of our Higher Power and to stop controlling. When we yield in that way and when we are willing to see the truth, we feel that we have awakened. We are amazed at what we now see.

Today I am grateful for my spiritual awakening and for the truth it allows me to see.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

A crisis is only a turning point.

~ Anne Lindthorst ~

The sting is removed from a crisis when we accept it as a turning point. Our lives have been full of turning points. A moment’s reflection brings to mind crises that moved us to far better places. For instance, we may not have counted on finding sobriety and this program of recovery, but a significant crisis delivered us here.

Because we remember how frightening a crisis can be, let’s make an effort to help our sisters gain a healthier perspective on the turning points in their lives. When we’re in a rocking boat, it’s not easy to remember that a storm ushers in clear skies. Sharing this information with our struggling sisters keeps us from forgetting it too.

With enough faith, we can look forward to the lessons and growth experiences life offers. We’ll never doubt their contribution to our developing nature.

I need not fear a troubling situation today. It is offering me a lesson I am ready to learn.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I try to accept people who don’t accept me

My dual disorder is a difficult, awkward, and troublesome pair of illnesses. Some people don’t think I’m really sick. Others do think I’m sick and avoid me. Either way I can feel rejected, defensive, and ashamed.

But I know the nature and significance of my illnesses and I am learning to manage them. I suppose it’s not surprising that some people wouldn’t understand or accept me and my particular set of problems. But these people do not live or make choices about my life—I do. And I am happier and healthier when I choose how much their opinions will affect me.

I will get support when I feel stigmatized and then concentrate on working my dual recovery plan.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

My friend, this body offers to carry us for nothing — as the ocean carries logs.

~ Robert Bly ~

Our bodies have silently endured the abuse of our addiction and withdrawal. They have faithfully carried us to the point we’re at now, and have showed us a willingness to heal. Now it’s time for us to repay our bodies.

The body is very honest in asking for what it needs. When it needs food or rest, it tells us. But sometimes we don’t listen very well and we suffer the consequences. If we store up anger or stress, we are likely to get sick. If we abuse ourselves physically, we’ll suffer injury or chronic pain.

By listening carefully to our physical selves, and lovingly giving rest, play, and nourishment, we keep ourselves healthy enough to continue growing in recovery. Even though it’s easy to take our bodies for granted, we must not. The physical self is our house in this life; it is our communication system, our transportation, our temple of prayer, and our means of physical pleasure. The way to find balance in our new life is through letting our bodies participate fully in recovery, just as we let our minds and spirits.

Today may I express my gratitude for my body by some loving attention to it.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Morning is when the wick is lit. Aflame is ignited, the day delighted with heat and light, we start to fight for something more than before.

~ Jeb Dickerson ~

Most addicts consider themselves to be night owls rather than early birds. Even if you were an early riser when you used, you most likely woke up hungover or spent the morning working at half-speed as you tried to clear the fog in your brain.

As your body frees itself from the restraints imposed by addiction, you may find that you greet the morning in a whole different way. If you are not naturally an early riser, you can become one. Train yourself to awaken earlier in the morning by going to bed a few minutes earlier each night. Use the increased amount of time you have in the morning to exercise, meditate, prepare a healthy breakfast, or spend time with your children. You can also use this extra time in the morning to go into work and catch up with e-mails, prepare for meetings, or even take on extra responsibilities.

In the evening, set aside some time to prepare for the next day so you will be able to arise and start your day with direction and purpose. Over time, you may discover that what once was your least favorite time of day becomes your favorite time.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.

~ Edward Bulwer-Lytton ~

The violin virtuoso whose concerts are sold-out has spent innumerable hours of practice to achieve such fame. That person wouldn’t think of inviting the public to a practice session because of the flaws they might hear.

We aren’t virtuosos, yet we’re always on view to the public. Everyone gets to see our good performances as well as our bad. Because of this, we may often struggle with impatience and disappointment in our striving to “look good” in front of others.

Yet we’re all struggling in front of one another. Just as others see our imperfections, so do we see theirs. None of us are virtuosos in life. To become skilled in living, we need to live One Day at a Time and learn as we go.

I don’t need to strive for perfection and skill. I can just be myself in front of people. 

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Following our guide

The biggest danger for us is delusion. A delusion, once started, is unable to check itself. When we’re no longer honest with ourselves, we lose sight of what is good for us.

But our knowing Guide will help us when we wander. If we’re caught up in the midst of our delusion, at first we may ignore our Higher Power’s lead. But a sincere request will always bring our Guide to our aid.

Do I follow my true Guide?

May I find the wisdom to call upon my Guide whenever I get caught up in my delusions.

Today I will check myself for delusions by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I want, by understanding myself, to understand others. I want to be all that I am capable of becoming . . . This all sounds very strenuous and serious. But now that I have wrestled with it, it’s no longer so. I feel happy—deep down. All is well.

~ KATHERINE MANSFIELD ~

Newcomer

There are still days when I rebel against recovery—not by using, not even by skipping a meeting, but just by bringing a negative, rebellious attitude. More often, though, I’ve begun to sense the awesomeness of the journey I’ve undertaken. It’s then that I experience recovery as a miracle, and I feel at peace.

Sponsor

Life doesn’t have to be a bed of roses for us to feel happy. Our happiness comes, not from external circumstances, but from a place deep in ourselves. Self-knowledge and self- acceptance are growing inside us, strengthening the core of our being. As people sharing the experience of recovery, we have the chance to return over and over to the sense of the miraculous. I sometimes think, “By rights, I shouldn’t even be here. My addiction eventually would have killed me, if I hadn’t quit.” I’m flooded with a sense of the mystery of recovery and of gratitude for this second chance at life.

In recovery, we have the opportunity to discover and fulfill our Higher Power’s purpose for us. We know that it has something to do with caring for ourselves and others, with giving service and being the best that we can be.

Today, whatever is happening on the outside, I sense that all is well.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The average person has so much trouble in finding a satisfactory faith simply because the mind has difficulty visualizing a force so powerful as anything but a very complex thing. He thinks he must understand it in order to acquire it and use it.

When we eat a meal we believe that we shall digest it and that we will be strengthened and sustained by it. Yet few of us know the mysteries of the digestive functions, but we get just as much sustenance from our meals as those who do.

We therefore eat our meals on faith and we would probably ruin our digestion if we tried to figure it out.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Heal(ing): Your sick mind cannot heal your sick mind.

2) Opportunity: Alcoholism is an equal opportunity destroyer and the 12 Step program is an equal opportunity restorer.

3) Simple: Most good ideas are simple.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

That Great Purpose
<>Keep making progress in your Twelve Step recovery.
Let your aim be as steady as a star.
Let the world battle and stress.
You may be assaulted, hassled,
insulted, slandered, wounded, and rejected. <>

You may be chased by enemies,
abused by them, forgotten by friends,
hated and rejected by others, but see to it
that with steady determination
and with unfaltering devotion,
you pursue that great purpose of your life
and the object of your being
until at last you can say:
“I have finished the work which You,
dear God, have given me to do.”

~ Adapted, author unknown ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

TRAINING YOUR THOUGHTS

Thought is the real causative force in life, and there is no other. You cannot have one kind of mind and another kind of environment. You cannot change your environment while leaving your mind unchanged. This is the real key to life; if you change your mind your conditions must change too—your body must change, your activities must change; your home must change; the color-tone of your whole life must change.

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind . . . (Romans 12:2).

This may be called the Great Cosmic Law. The practical difficulty in applying it arises from the fact that our thoughts are so close to us that it is difficult, without a little practice, to stand back and look at them objectively. Yet that is just what you must learn to do. You must train yourself to choose the subject of your thinking at any given time, and also to choose the emotional tone.

If you are not determined to start in now and carefully select all day the kind of thoughts that you are going to think, you may as well give up all hope of shaping your life into the kind of thing that you want it to be. The way to start on a seven-day mental diet is to begin now. 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Just Show Up

Do whatever comes your way to do as well as you can. Think as little as possible about yourself and as much as possible about other people…put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

Shortly after my mother passed away I was invited to present a seminar in Philadelphia. At the time, my fee was 50 percent of the income, with a minimum of $500. Since this was a small group, I quoted a flat rate of $500. When I received a flyer for the event, I saw that the ticket price had been set at $25, rather than the usual $15.

That’s too high! I thought. No one will come at that price. As I dialed the sponsor’s number, however, an inner voice stopped me, advising, “Don’t try to boss the finances; just let it be.” When the sponsor later told me that 50 people had signed up for the program, I wondered if I had made a mistake in asking only for the base fee rather than the percentage. A week later, 75 people had registered; now I regretted not negotiating my regular deal. I was tempted to ask the sponsor if she would be willing to go 50-50, but once again the inner voice said, “Let it be. Your job is to show up, offer love and healing to everyone, and let Spirit handle the finances.”

The night of the seminar, I watched in awe as 135 people filed into the room. Again, I had to overcome my temptation to regret or renegotiate. When the time came for the sponsor to write me a check, she told me, “Since we had such a good turnout, I think it’s only fair that we go 50-50 on the profit,” and she wrote me a check for $1,100, the highest income I had earned to that date. The next day, I received my mom’s final doctor bill for…$1,100!

In spite of all the meandering of my mind and emotions, Spirit was running that event all the while. Spirit knew how much to charge and who to send. The only voice worth hearing was the one that advised me to just show up and give love.

I pray to remember my true purpose as a giver of peace and healing.

I am here to be a blessing. I trust Spirit to handle the details.

[bluidkiti]

December 28

Step by Step

Today, let me loosen my grip on my perspective that the program hammers what I cannot do and, instead, that it enables me with what I can do. While I cannot continue in futile endeavor to regain control over alcohol, I can control it by not feeding it. While I cannot continue to engage in conduct that injures myself and others, I can chart a 180-degree course change and start to give something nurturing instead of inflicting harm. And while I cannot always make direct amends for whatever reason, I can make indirect amends by working a program in which my sobriety is its own amend. AA is not a program of cannot; it is, instead, a program of can. Today the first word in can’t is can. And I can. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

All these activities help us develop different paths of ourselves, to bring more clarity, compassion, and self- awareness, to attain the highest level of who we are. In turn, we are able to share this with others.

~ NICOTINE ANONYMOUS MEMBER ~

So many good thoughts are shared at meetings. Who could speak more pointedly to my nicotine-affected life than another addict? One poetic member explained how the struggle to quit felt to her in these words, “God and the Devil were arguing in my head, and I was rooting for the Devil.”

She was an honest person. She knew the choice to quit was not a clear and easy decision. Even so when the urge hits, I now have choices. I do not have to choose nicotine.

I am fortunate to have the support and guidance available at meetings. I get the benefit of this support by getting myself out to meetings. Sometimes when I least feel like going, the meeting is the most beneficial for me. When I am feeling less needy, I can go to meetings to give to new members the help and support that was given to me.

Meetings sustain me through the most difficult stages of getting free from nicotine. I discover the depths that the Program offers in shaping a better way of life where I can grow beyond addiction.

Today, I am grateful for my new life with clarity, compassion and self-awareness.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

MOVING AWAY

I’m slipping when I begin to dislike the company and conversation of the Program.

~ Anonymous ~

There is a reason why a lamb gets separated from a flock. The flock will be eating on a particular pasture and a lamb will take a fancy to grass just off to the edge of the field. So the lamb takes a little nibble of this grass. Then he moves just ever so slightly further from the edge and takes another little nibble, then just a bit further and another nibble.

Each little nibble of grass takes the lamb further and further from the flock. After a while, having eaten enough grass, the lamb pokes his head up and notices that the flock has left him. B-A-A-A-A-A! the lamb wails. How could his flock have left him?

I will begin slipping when I stop paying attention to my flock. My group will not leave me; I will leave my group. I will leave like the lamb, just one conversation, one meeting at a time. After a while I, too, could end up wailing for help just like the little lamb.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The spiritual life is about becoming more at home in your own skin.

~ Parker J. Palmer ~

We will not feel serene and at peace with the world every day. Some days we feel distressed and restless and we want something we may not even be able to name. At their most intense, these feelings are like ravenous hunger or dark dread. We may wish we could escape into another reality—or into the “unreality” of co-dependency or addiction. But now we have the opportunity to use better, more satisfying methods of coping.

When we look at these feelings as spiritual needs, we can use spiritual principles to achieve peace of mind. We can make contact with a trusted friend who will listen respectfully to our feelings. We can remember that our Higher Power is always with us, and we can take quiet time for meditation and reflection. We can spend some time where we feel most connected with God- walking outdoors among trees and gardens, listening to music, or going for a good workout. After we respond to distressed feelings in this way, we get relief and grow stronger without the negatives of our old escapes.

Today I will follow the spiritual principles that nurture my life and make me feel better.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The work of adult life is not easy.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

What does being an adult mean to most of us? Perhaps taking full responsibility for all of our actions comes quickest to mind. While using alcohol and other drugs, we were prone to blame our troubles on the nearest warm body. And to our detriment, we often got away with it.

We may still tend to blame others for the strife in our lives. We aren’t immediately willing to go from our assumed blamelessness to full responsibility, just because we gave up our drug of choice. But the people who share our lives now are helping us accept the responsibility that has been ours all along.

The principles of AA make recovery more palatable. We know we are ready for the changes that are promised or we wouldn’t be here, now.

I will do my work today. I will accept responsibility for all my actions, and I will think before opening my mouth.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to learn about my relapse triggers

I feel at a loss. I’d been clean and sober for a while, but then I slipped twice and I don’t really know how it happened. As best I can recall, I got very upset about something and the next thing I knew, I was feeling the guilt and ache of withdrawal.

In my group it’s a good thing that we’re learning how important it is to prevent a relapse before it happens. This means finding out on my own (or with outside help) (a) the things I think or do that put me at risk for using, and (b) the things I think or do that immediately endanger my recovery. I want recovery, and these days I am willing to go to any lengths to get it.

I will write down my two most dangerous triggers for slips and relapse and discuss them with my sponsor and counselor.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Gardening is an active participation in the deepest mysteries of the universe.

~ Thomas Berry ~

We are not alone. We often hear that, but sometimes it’s hard to believe it. Even when we pray daily, sometimes it seems our words are lost some-where in a void. When these feelings take hold in us, it may help to look for a symbol of our unity with the universe as part of God’s plan.

An ordinary house plant can be such a symbol. We water our plants to keep them alive, and some of us even talk to them. And there’s a good reason. Plants breathe in the gases we exhale, and then they exhale oxygen, which we need to live. We are in partnership. God’s part is to provide the soil and sunlight by which the plant makes its food, and by which we grow ours.

With every breath we take, then, we know we are not alone. The universe is by nature a web of unity and interaction. In recovery, we share talk, experiences, and love. Just by being there, by “sharing breath,” and by being ourselves, we share in the partnership of life.

Today let me cultivate my partnership in the world.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I’ve never not taken a risk in my career, and it’s been pretty grueling…. You just don’t stop, no matter what anyone says.

~ Steven Tyler ~

There are addicts who think that their life as a user was one of great risk. But were they really taking a risk, or were they making choices that were fundamentally a roll of the dice?

There is a world of difference between behaving in dangerous ways and taking a life-enhancing risk. Quit-ting your job without any possibility of employment and limited finances, and then hoping you will land on your feet and find something you like to do is risky. But investigating other interests and then quitting your job with a clear career path in mind is taking a risk. One involves leaping into uncharted territory with no idea of where you are heading; the other is making the leap, but doing so with more planning and a greater understanding of your desired outcome.

Similarly, attempting to quit drinking on your own is risky. But using a program of recovery, where there is support and like-minded individuals, is taking a risk. Even though risk taking is scary, and outcomes are not always certain, you will never know what you can be, what you can do, and how your life can change until you take a risk.

I will not put everything at risk—but I will risk something.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

One does not have to believe everything one hears.

~ Cicero ~

As we were growing up, we may have been told many things about ourselves. Some may have been complimentary, but others may have been vicious and degrading statements made by a chemically dependent parent or guardian. Because we were caught in the disease, we may have believed all the horrible things that were said.

But today we don’t have to buy into anyone’s negative comments. We don’t have to believe we are no good, we’re stupid, lazy, helpless, insecure, inept, or will never amount to anything. Anytime we believe those messages, we’re allowing a label to be stuck to our chests.

We can choose to walk around advertising our labels, or we can take them off and rip them up. We can turn away physically and emotionally from the source of the negative comments. The only label we should wear should say we are good people.
<>Tonight I can affirm I’m a good person and that I deserve the best.
hor: Amy E. Dean

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Changing attitudes

Slowly we have to change destructive attitudes and bury our hate, resentment, anxiety, and jealousy. These can be replaced with love, patience, mercy, kindness, and gentleness.

When we practice these new attitudes, we break down old barriers. Our outlook on life will cease to consist of finding fault because someone forgot something, someone’s judgment was bad, or someone acted selfishly. We learn to overlook these circumstances as our Higher Power does.

Have I changed my attitudes?

Higher Power, may my heart’s desire be to change my attitudes and to see and reflect the glory of God in all living things.

Today I will appraise my current attitudes by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Be yourself, that’s all there is of you.

~ RALPH WALDO EMERSON ~

Newcomer

There are some major decisions I made about my life years ago that I’m now beginning to question. It scares me to think that I may have made some mistakes about who I am and want to be. I wonder if I have the courage to change, after all this time, and if I’ll live long enough to find fulfillment.

Sponsor

As recovery progresses, many of us find that we have questions about life choices that we made long ago, or that we let others make for us. We’ve allowed these choices to define us, and now we’re not entirely sure they fit. Even if we wished in the past that we’d taken other options, we may have lacked the willingness and energy to take ourselves seriously. Now that we have had some sober experience, we may find that we have questions about former life decisions.

We’ve learned in recovery not to make hasty decisions based on our desire to stifle a moment’s doubt or anxiety. But we’ve also learned that we can go deep within, listen to our own spirit, and honor what we find there, even if it doesn’t conform to other people’s expectations or to our own preconceptions about who we are supposed to be. We know we can survive upheaval and complexity—we have already done it. We know how to ask for support today and how to discuss our uncertainties and hopes with trusted friends and counselors as we arrive at the truth of our deepest dreams.

Today, I’m making my own map and becoming willing to follow it.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is very often easier to identify an alcoholic by his hang-over than by his drinking pattern. Alcoholics, for the most part, resemble the non-alcoholics when they have a load aboard, but in the mornings, when the sweats and the shakes set in, then the alcoholic can be identified by the degree of his suffering. The alcoholic’s hang-over cannot be gotten rid of by ten-thirty simply with aspirin or Bromos.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Working with Others: Give a ****; be a channel.

2) MISQUOTED SLOGANS: Sleasy does it.

3) Al-Anon: Misery is optional.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

I Wish I Were
<>I wish I were big enough to honestly admit all my shortcomings, Brilliant enough to accept praise without it making me arrogant, <>Tall enough to tower over dishonesty,
Strong enough to welcome criticism,
Compassionate enough to understand human frailties,
Wise enough to recognize mistakes,
Humble enough to appreciate greatness,
Brave enough to stand by my friends,
Human enough to be thoughtful of my neighbor,
And spiritual enough to be devoted to the love of God.

~ Author unknown ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

WATCH AND WORK

To train yourself in the habit of thought selection will be difficult for the first few days, but it is the most interesting experiment that you could possibly make. You will be amazed at the things that you will learn about yourself. This week may be the most significant week in your whole life; not only will you be able to face your present difficulties in a better spirit, but the difficulties will go. You cannot change conditions directly—you have often tried to do so and failed—but go on the seven-day mental diet and conditions must change for you.

This then is your prescription. For seven days you must not allow yourself to dwell for a moment on any kind of negative thought. You must watch yourself for a week and must not under any pretense allow your mind to dwell on any thought that is not positive, constructive, optimistic, kind. This discipline will be so strenuous that you could not maintain it consciously for much more than a week, but a week will be enough, because by that time the habit of positive thinking will begin to be established. Some changes for the better will have come into your life, encouraging you enormously, and then the new way of life will be so attractive that you will find your mentality aligning itself almost automatically.

Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Primed

I fairly sizzle with zeal and enthusiasm and do the things that ought to be done by me.

~ Unity co-founder Charles Fillmore, in his 94th year ~

You are in remarkably good health for a man of 60,” the doctor told Mr. Griggs as he completed his physical. “What, may I ask, did your father die of?”

“My father is alive and well,” answered Mr. Griggs. “He’s 84, and quite vital.”

“That’s wonderful,” remarked the doctor. “How about your grandfather? What was the cause of his death?”

“My grandfather is also alive; he’s 106 years old, in fine health, and he just got married.”

“Married?” the doctor asked, stunned. “Why would a 106-year-old man want to get married?”

“Did I say he wanted to get married?”

Experts from mystical yogis to holistic scientists tell us that a natural human lifespan was intended to be 120. Most human beings do not live that long because we live in unnatural ways—eating tainted foods, breathing polluted air, living under great stress, and thinking small thoughts. Were we to purify our environment, diets, lifestyles, and attitudes, we would nearly double the lifespan we have come to expect.

This means that the ages of 60 to 80 should be our prime. Age is a state of mind, and at any moment you can choose what state you will live in. Satchel Paige asked, “How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?”

Our culture instills heavy programming about what people at various ages can and cannot do. All of this is but a belief system that is real if you subscribe to it and meaningless if you do not. Live from your spirit, and age means nothing.

I pray to move beyond concepts of years and fears. Help me remember that I am bigger than any concept of time and age.

I am eternally young free, and whole.

[bluidkiti]

December 29

Step by Step

Today, when resolutions for the coming new year are in vogue, I will make none because to do so skirts the program’s edict to take life one day at a time. Further, I have no guarantee that an entire year is promised me, and I cannot live for a day in the future because, in doing that, I am neglecting today. AA discourages us from living or looking too far ahead if today is sacrificed and encourages us to make our resolutions daily. Today, awakening to a new day, my resolution is to adhere to the steps and principles of the program and not drink and, further, to grow in the sobriety I seek. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ A YEAR OF MIRACLES ~ (Meditations Written by Members of Nicotine Anonymous) ~

How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.

~ MARCUS AURELIUS ~

Anger simmers inside me, boiling up at times. It is hurting the wrong people, coming out at the wrong time, and causing me problems. Did I quit using nicotine to become a monster? Where is this anger coming from?

Until recently, I buried my feelings by distracting myself with tobacco. Now I am dealing with a backlog of emotional energy that has never been acknowledged.

It is true that I have taken the lid off my emotions. Things will be turbulent for a time, but with each experience I gain some self-knowledge. If a certain thing has irritated me for a long time, now I can look at that and examine the best way to deal with my discomfort. If I blow up, timely apologies can mend the hurt of my hasty words. I discover that I must learn to guard my words when I am upset. I am gaining control over my emotional reactions. Each of these lessons moves me along the road to emotional recovery. That is one of the many gifts of getting free from the nicotine addiction.

The anger and irritability I experience are a stage in my recovery from the nicotine addiction. No magic cure will take them painlessly away. I must grow through experiencing these feelings and honestly dealing with them, at long last.

Today, I will bravely face all emotions.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Apathy is the behavior of a slave.

~ Richard Wagenvoord ~

When we were slaves to addiction and codependency, our values were suppressed and our enthusiasm for life was dampened. We were under the influence of our addictive brain. The prospect of life without our substance and without our controlling behavior seemed dull and very scary.

In recovery, we also recover from dullness and apathy. Life gets interesting and full of possibilities. We shed our turned-off attitude. We drop our cynicism and become believers, open to interesting and exciting opportunities. Having faced our slavery and found a path to freedom, the world opens up to us. We know we have a lot of work to do, but we are willing to suspend our doubts. We see that life can be better for us. Apathy has been replaced by hope and a deep sense of gratitude.

Today I can see a path to follow that makes me hopeful and I am full of gratitude for my freedom. 

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

In childhood I was told that if I have faith, health, and love, I have everything. As an adult I know it’s true.

~ Mardy Kopischke ~

Over the years we may have wasted lots of energy seeking material possessions, certain that one more outfit, a new hairstyle, or a better-paying job would fix our problems. Nuturing our health, practicing the presence of a Higher Power, or giving love were low on our “to do” list. Other people may have even suggested these practices to us, but we didn’t understand the payoff.

Now in recovery we are beginning to reap the benefits of such practices. We have discovered that the principles of the program, when lived fully, cultivate our faith, strengthen our health, and teach us the meaning of being loved. These in turn make giving love to others easier. In the process we realize that everything we ever hoped to gain erroneously through possessions can be ours when we follow the simple suggestions of this program.

I am wiser now that I know how to nurture faith, health, and love.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am working on my fear of people

I tend to be afraid of people. For one thing, I can’t seem to trust much yet. I’m also afraid to talk. I don’t know what to say and I think I’ll make a fool of myself. Mostly, I’m afraid that they won’t like me. It’s hard for me to make friends, hard to feel safe, hard to relax. And easy to feel alone.

But with the help I am getting for my emotional problems—and my drinking—I feel better. I am learning that I am a worthwhile, likable person and that I’m not as different as I thought I was. The best part is that I am not alone: I’m meeting others who feel as I do and are working a program of change.

I will practice smiling at myself in the mirror and saying “Hi!”

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

God dwells wherever man lets Him in.

~ Mendel of Kotzk ~

God has entrusted each of us with a little part of Himself. When we are in the most pain, or feeling lost and confused, we need to call upon this small piece of God: our conscience.

Perhaps our parents told us about our con-science when we were small, that through it God would speak to us when we were hurting, as if through the depths of our pain. That concept is as true today as it was many years ago. When we open ourselves to God we can hear His voice.

The struggles we face in recovery are made simpler by listening to the voice of God within us. God can be our strength when we feel weak; can give us purpose when we have none; can give us hope when we despair. God is the voice of concern and compassion, giving us the power to conquer our problems one day at a time.

Today help me hear and trust my conscience — the voice of God within me.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Don’t be fooled by the calendar. There are only as many days in the year as you make use of.

~ Charles Richards ~

Do you remember playing the childhood game “Mother May I?” In this game one person faces a group and assumes the role of “mother,” directing the progress of players as they attempt to advance forward until one person overtakes the “mother” position.

In much the same way, recovery is a journey that involves a step-by-step process of growth and achievement, with the ultimate goal of placing distance between your former life in which you used to a life of abstinence. Some days you may find the steps you make to be large, and it may seem as if you are making great progress. Other days your recovery may feel like the steps you make are small and your progress is painstakingly slow. And there may also be days in which you find yourself moving backward rather than forward.

But there is no timetable or calendar in recovery. It is not a race, a game of winners and losers, or a timed event. Recovery takes as long as it needs to take. Rather than be cheered when you make great progress and disappointed when your progress seems small, be equally satisfied with whatever you accomplish.

I will celebrate each day of abstinence.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

It is important for everyone who is trying personally to apply these principles, to understand that all progress is vibratory and uneven. The higher standpoint is only reached through a long series of ‘ups and downs.’

~ Henry Wood ~

Are we expecting some magical signal to occur when we’re “cured” of the symptoms of our disease? Do we believe once we “master” the tools of the program we won’t feel pain, sadness, resentment, or disappointment? Are we still anticipating a happily- ever-after to occur in our lives?

Life is naturally full of ups and downs. Every day isn’t all sunshine and perfect temperatures. Nature has its tragedies and destruction as well as its growth and harvest. If we see both good and bad as complements to each other, we will see life is a continuous process.

If we apply the principles of the program, our lives will get better. The ups and downs won’t go away, but we will stop focusing on only one or the other. We will see it all as part of the same picture.

My only expectation tonight is to let life flow the way it’s meant to.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Having faith

We find in our daily lives that there are people who don’t realize a Higher Power. Some of these people may ridicule us for our beliefs, but we need faith to get better.

We rely on our Higher Power to help keep us from drugs and alcohol. We must remember to practice our principles and to maintain our beliefs so we will not be swayed by contrary opinions.

Am I a true believer?

Higher Power, I pray that I may have the patience to love all people no matter what their beliefs.

Today I will express my faith by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Freedom breeds freedom. Nothing else does.

~ ANNE ROE ~

Newcomer

Now that I’m getting close to a year in recovery, I have this crazy feeling sometimes. I say to myself, “What am I doing without my drug of choice? It’s been too long!”

Sponsor

We’ve talked together in the past about “anniversary anxiety.” It’s natural for doubts to arise at a point in time when we’re about to celebrate a success. Some of us may wonder, “Do I really deserve all this? Is this really me?”

Fortunately, we don’t have to act on a crazy feeling any more. We recognize that though recovery is a relatively recent phenomenon in our lives, it’s rooted in us now, and it’s essential to our survival and growth. We make a point of sharing our doubts and fears at meetings, where others in recovery will help us remember where active addiction took us and laugh with us at our doubts about recovery.

Active addiction is not, as we’ve sometimes believed, an essential part of our identity. It is an obstacle to discovering and nurturing that identity.

Today, I renew my commitment to recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Is someone happier, better, or braver because of some act of yours today? If you can answer yes to any or all of them, then you can feel rather confident that you are progressing in the AA way of living.

If you can’t — then you are not giving it the old College try and you are cheating yourself out of a lot of happiness that could have been yours.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Drink(ing,): Grateful alcoholics don’t drink, and drinking alcoholics aren’t grateful.

2) Health(y): Don’t try to be normal; try to be healthy.

3) Opportunity: In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.

by Shelly Marshall

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Be at Peace

Do not look forward in fear to the changes of life,

rather look to them with full hope that as they
arise, God will lead you safely through all things.
And when you cannot stand it,
God will carry you in His arms.

Do not fear what will happen tomorrow.

The same God who cares for you today
will take care of you today and every day.
God will either shield you from suffering or
will give you unfailing strength to bear it.
Be patient and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DEALING WITH THE NEGATIVE

What is meant by negative thinking? A negative thought is any thought of failure, disappointment, or trouble; any thought of criticism, or spite, or jealousy, or condemnation of others, or self-condemnation; any thought of sickness or accident; or, in short, any kind of limitation. In practice you will never have any trouble in knowing whether a given thought is positive or negative. Even if your brain tries to deceive you, your heart will whisper the truth.

Second, you must be quite clear that what this scheme calls for is that you shall not dwell upon negative things. It is not the thoughts that come to you that matter, but only such of them as you choose to entertain and dwell upon. Many negative thoughts will come to you all day long. Some will be given to you by other people, or you will hear disagreeable news. These things, however, do not matter so long as you do not entertain them. An analogy is furnished by the case of a man who is sitting by an open fire when a red hot cinder flies out and falls on his sleeve. If he blows that cinder off at once, without a moment’s delay to think about it, no harm is done. But if he allows it to rest on him for a single moment, under any pretense, the mischief is done, and it will be a troublesome task to repair that sleeve. So it is with a negative thought.

Repent therefore of this thy wickedness, and pray God, if perhaps the thought of thine heart may be forgiven thee (Acts 8:22).

People often find that the starting of this seven-day mental diet seems to stir up difficulties. It seems as though everything begins to go wrong at once. This may be disconcerting, but it is really a good sign. Suppose your whole world seems to rock on its foundations. Hold on steadily, let it rock, and when the rocking is over, the picture will have reassembled itself into something much nearer to your heart’s desire.

Do not tell anyone else that you are on a diet. Remember that your soul should be the Secret Place of the Most High. When you have secured your new mentality, then tell the story to anyone else whom you think is likely to be helped by it.

Tell ye your children of it, and let your children tell their children, and their children another generation (Joel 1:3). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Toxic Thoughts

Only by self-respect will you compel others to respect you.

~ Fyodor Dostoevsky ~

“Hey, Samantha, there’s a pig out here!” I called to my office manager.

“Watch for its mother, the dog.”

“What?”

“Our neighbors found the pig in a field just after its birth. The only animal role model it had was the dog. The pig thinks the dog is its mother; he follows her around everywhere.” As she spoke, a big black dog emerged from the yard. Immediately, the pig nuzzled up to it and followed it home.

Our predicament is not unlike the pig’s. We have accepted an identity unlike what we are. We are divine beings, and we think we are limited. We are whole, and we define ourselves by our parts. We are spiritual beings, and we act as if we are bodies.

Toxic relationships are the subject of much discussion. Books, talk shows, and therapy sessions are buzzing with references to toxic parents, toxic children, and toxic partners. The notion is that some people are just unhealthy to be around, and we should avoid them.

Wise, to be sure, but there is more. A Course in Miracles reminds us that “I am responsible for what I see” and “I am affected only by my thoughts.” Behind all situations in the outer world, our thoughts determine our experience. Our real work is to see through the eyes of love, not fear.

We are not required to stay in abusive situations. The most powerful place to begin extricating ourselves from abuse is in our own mind. Everyone we encounter mirrors something we believe about who we are and what we deserve. Know the good you merit, and you will attract people that honor, not hurt you. If we can learn to love ourselves enough, the thought of blaming anyone else for our pain will be as foreign to us as a pig thinking it is a dog.

Help me to create a world that mirrors the love I deserve.

I am as God created me. I remember who I am. I deserve infinite love.