Today's Thought - April

[bluidkiti]

April 1

Developing a sense of humor

We may not believe this, but it helps to think that life isn't strictly serious. There's much humor in it, and a sense of humor often eases pain. If we can laugh, chances are we can forgive both ourselves and others.

It may not feel like it, but recovery isn't strictly serious either. Staying sober (and helping others do the same) is often a process full of joy.

Can I find something to laugh at today?

Higher Power, help me see the humor in all my seriousness. Help me laugh.

Today I will get in touch with my sense of humor by...

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*

[bluidkiti]

April 2

Becoming Our Own Best Friend

In a certain sense, recovery from any of the things that we recover from is about learning how to become our own best friend. Making friends with ourselves is not an easy concept for us to grasp initially, but we figure it out eventually. We befriend ourselves by stopping the behaviors that are causing us harm, then doing the work that we need to do to heal our traumas and, over time, release our past.

We befriend ourselves by treating ourselves kindly and with appreciation - the same ways that we treat other friends in our life. After years of being our own worst enemy, becoming our own best friend is a relief and an opportunity. It opens the door to self-care, self-compassion, and, over time, self-love. Becoming our own best friend is an important milestone in our healing. After all, we can never have too many friends, right?

Are you your own best friend? If not, can you practice treating yourself as you would treat a dear friend?

Today's reading is from the book She Recovers Every Day: Meditations for Women*

[bluidkiti]

April 3

Getting Help While Still in Denial

I did not want to go to the hospital. I didn't want to get help. I had a couple of close friends who were the ones to actually drag me into the car and drive me there. It was a bad scene at the hospital, because they had to call security when we arrived. Four or five guys had to come out and physically drag me inside and then hold me down when I got there.

My journey to sobriety was difficult, and I didn't want to go there at all. I guess you could say I was in denial about how bad things had gotten. But it was good to have those kinds of people in my life - people who knew that something was wrong, that I needed help, and how to get me there. Honestly, I don't know if I would still be here if it weren't for them.

So I am definitely thankful to them for putting me - reluctantly - on this path that I'm so grateful to be following today.

Today I will be grateful for those who have helped me on this sobriety journey.

~John K., U.S. Navy, 2005–2009

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*

[bluidkiti]

April 4

Reflection for the Day

Every man and woman who has joined the program and intends to stick around has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn't it true that, in all matters related to their addictions, each of them has decided to turn his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of the program? So already a willingness has been achieved to cast out one's own will and one's own ideas about the addiction in favor of those suggested by the program. If this isn't turning one's will and life over to a newfound "Providence," then what is it? Have I had a spiritual awakening as the result of the Steps?
Today I Pray

For myself, I pray for a life that is grounded and centered with my Higher Power. I thank my Higher Power often for the spiritual awakening I have felt since I turned my life over to it. May the words spiritual awakening be a clue to others that there is a free fund of spiritual power within each person. It must only be discovered.
Today I Will Remember

I will try to be Higher Power–centered.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

[bluidkiti]

April 5

Taking an inventory helps us know who we really are.

Before calling it a day, let's look honestly at who we were today. Were we thoughtful and courteous to our friends and lovers? Did we criticize them for not living up to our expectations? Did we put ourselves down for not measuring up to the standards of someone else? Did we ask our Higher Power for guidance, or were we ego-bound?

Getting to know who we are is crucial if we are to change. Doing a daily inventory reflects our willingness to look at ourselves. Most of us want to make changes, or we wouldn't be here in this program. However, we don't have to change everything at once. In fact, that wouldn’t be possible. Let's just focus on a small change.

Evaluating ourselves at the end of each day will clarify what we need to do differently.

I can be the person I really want to be if I know which behaviors I need to change. I'll do an inventory today.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

[bluidkiti]

April 6

The god in him had cried out to the god in me.

~Mary Renault

There are times when we seem to be looking directly into the depths of another person's soul. We associate these moments of deep communication and closeness - seeming oneness - with sexual intimacy, but in fact they can occur in a friendship or in any kind of relationship that permits us to come together in a profound experience of sharing. At such privileged moments, we sense that our human love is both a part and an expression of something larger. We sense that we are channels for a loving energy that fuels the universe.

We can't always have peak experiences. But we can see the divine in others, if we look for it. We can treat as sacred all the ways that our lives touch other lives. We can share in a way that allows others to begin to see into our souls.

Today, all my relationships are part of my relationship with a Higher Power.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day

[bluidkiti]

April 7

Patience

How sick and tired we may become of people telling us to be patient or to learn patience. How frustrating it can be to want to finally have something, or to move forward, and then not have that happen. How irritating to have someone tell us to wait while our needs have not been met and we're in the midst of anxiety, frustration, and inaction.

Do not confuse the suggestion to be patient with the old rule about not having feelings. Being patient does not mean we go through the sometimes grueling process of life and recovery without having feelings! Feel the frustration. Feel the impatience. Get as angry as you need to about not having your needs met. Feel your fear. Controlling our feelings will not control the process!

We find patience by surrendering to our feelings. Patience cannot be forced. It is a gift, one that closely follows acceptance and gratitude. When we work through our feelings to fully accept who we are and what we have, we will be ready to be and have more.

Today, I will let myself have my feelings while I practice patience.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*

[bluidkiti]

April 8

Most of us would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.

~Jimmy F.

It is not always the person who tells us nice things that is our friend. Often the one who cares enough to tell us the truth - even if that truth hurts - is the one who cares the most.

Adult children oftentimes have problems with boundaries. We do not always see where we are out of bounds. We are too close to the situation. We do not have perspective. It is a friend who has some distance from us and our environment who can be more objective. When friends tell us what they see, we gain the perspective to make healthier decisions.

Just because it is criticism doesn't mean that they are right or that we should believe them. And just because it is criticism doesn't mean we should reject the person and dismiss what is said.

As I learn to accept my imperfections, I am better able to accept honesty from others.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy: Daily Meditations for Adult Children*

[bluidkiti]

April 9

Unthankfulness is theft.

~Martin Luther

Many of us have experienced a guest who tracked in dirt, ate our food, dirtied our dishes, took our time, whined and complained through the whole visit, and left without saying thank you. Such experiences leave us feeling angry and ripped off. We aren't eager to invite that person back to our home or to do any favors for him or her.

Let’s make sure we don't act like that bad guest. Let's be aware of the kind things people do for us every day - from greeting us with a smile or opening a door to preparing a meal or washing our clothes. Let's remember that we've been given the gift of sobriety and to daily offer prayers of gratitude. Let us look around the group and be grateful for those who offer us their stories and their hope. Higher Power, thank you! To my group, thank you! To life, thank you!
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, thank you for inviting me into your house and for the many wonderful gifts you have given me. Thank you for your love and the gift of sobriety.
Today's Action

Today I will call three group members and thank them for what they have given me.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me: More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple*

[bluidkiti]

April 10

Education is not a product: mark, diploma, job, money - in that order; it is a process.

~Bel Kaufman

Sometimes we think of education in terms of cash and security: we have to learn this before we can achieve that status. We talk about learning as an investment and insurance, and we get mad if it doesn't pay off.

Some of us may think of the education in a Twelve Step program in similar terms: I’ve gotten to Step Eight, only four more to go and I'm cured, I'm happy, I'm free. But education is a way of being in and viewing the world. It is a way, a path. It should be a journey, an adventure, an exploration of ourselves and our relationships with others in the world.

Our programs take place in time, and they go on for the rest of our lives. Each Step is an affirmation of a certain way of being and needs to be repeated and related to every other Step indefinitely. Like life, this kind of education is continuous, open-ended, and enduring.

My program is an ongoing process that continues to open new ways of being and relating to the world.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart

[bluidkiti]

April 11

Wisdom

He who would distinguish the true from the false must have an adequate idea of what is true and false.

~Baruch Spinoza

Wisdom is common sense. It will help us make the right choices in our attitudes and behavior. That way we can continue our spiritual progress.

Sometimes, wisdom is simply willingness to accept with faith the things we don't know from personal experience. We must receive, with an open mind, the messages of those who have lived through the problems we are facing for the first time.

We need to look for and listen to the wisdom in others. If we do, we will gain confidence in our own ability to tell the true from the false. We will begin to practice the principles of our recovery program in all parts of our lives.

Wisdom is earned. Wisdom is precious. The wise need simply to stand in silence for their wisdom to reveal itself. Let me learn wisdom.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It: A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations*

[bluidkiti]

April 12

How can anybody read the Gospels and fail to see how Jesus, in his contacts with all sorts and conditions of people, even the apparent good-for-nothings and worse, always seemed to find in them possibilities for sublime development?

~Carroll E. Simcox

Many of us feel we don't deserve God's love. We judge ourselves harshly and attribute the same judgment to God as the strict parent, the demanding teacher, or the punishing judge. We cannot believe that anyone could accept us as we are, and so we don't turn toward God.

Why do we feel this way? Perhaps because it's hard to feel that God could love us when we so rarely received love without strings attached from others. Many of us remain skeptical even when newfound spiritual friends shower us with love. Though we may not realize it at the time, these friends are providing a human framework into which the unconditional love of God can fit. If these friends can accept us as we are, we think, maybe God will, too. And of course God does.

When my hand reaches out to another, God's hand reaches back.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care: Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery*

[bluidkiti]

April 13

My life takes the course intended by my Higher Power when I go with the flow instead of against it.

~Kathy Kendall

The number of times we struggle today is directly related to how many outcomes we try to force. Our unwillingness to go with the flow can throw our journey off course. There is a rhythm to our lives - a pace and a direction - that's been set by our Higher Power. Until we come to believe in that truth and become willing to trust it, we'll cause ourselves many unnecessary problems and conflicts.

It’s restful to believe that there is a plan for our lives. It takes away the fretting and the guesswork, leaving many hours for play and creativity. It also assures us that we are special, not forgotten as we may have feared in the past.

I am willing to believe that I am on a special journey. Today's experiences are part of it. I won't fight them.

Today's reading is from the book A Woman's Spirit: More meditations for Women*

[bluidkiti]

April 14

When one door closes another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us.

~Alexander Graham Bell

Change is a basic fact of life, and with every change comes a loss. Even winning the lottery entails the loss of our life before the big win. During some periods of our life, we feel we are stuck and nothing changes, or we feel trapped in a situation we would love to change. Other times a change occurs that we would never choose, and we have to find a way to continue living with the new reality.

Coping with the closing and opening of doors is a fundamental spiritual matter. We are pilgrims on a journey and much of what happens along our way is beyond our control. Today will bring some things that we did not expect, and with the changes will be new possibilities that we did not expect. So we hold the spiritual attitude that while we cannot control what happens, we can choose how we will respond.

Today, I pray for the spiritual vision to see the doors that open for me.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones: More Daily Meditations for Men*

[willbe275]

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