Today's Thought - August

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August 1

I watched a man I know help his wife take care of their babies.

“How did you learn to be such a good dad?” I asked. He explained that his father had been a great dad. His mother had died when he was three, leaving his father on his own to care for him and his baby sister.

“So he just stepped up to the plate?” I asked.

“Like Babe Ruth,” he said.

Inventory Focus:

What – or who – is challenging you? Are you creating healthy challenges or unnecessary chaos? Do you want it just because you can’t have it, or do you really want it? Are you stepping up to the plate and accepting the real challenges in your life?

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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August 2

Reflection for the Day

What wonderful things could happen in my life if I could get rid of my natural impulse to justify my actions? Is honesty so deeply repressed under layers of guilt that I can't release it to understand my motives? Being honest with ourselves isn't easy. It's difficult to search out why I had this or that impulse and, more importantly, why I acted upon it. Nothing makes us feel so vulnerable as to give up the crutch of the alibi, yet my willingness to be vulnerable will go a long way toward helping me grow in the Program. Am I becoming more aware that self-deception multiplies my problems?

Today I Pray

May God remove my urge to make excuses. Help me to face up to the realities that surface when I am honest with myself. Help me to know, as certainly as day follows sunrise, that my difficulties will be lessened if I can only trust God's will.

Today I Will Remember

I will be willing to do God's will.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

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August 3

We are not unlike a particularly hardy crustacean. ... With each passage from one stage of human growth to the next, we, too, must shed a protective structure.
--Gail Sheehy

Our passage into a new stage of development was initiated by our desire to stop using chemicals. The values we lived by while using chemicals no longer fit us. We need to shed our old skin and grow a new one that reflects our current worldview.

We are now, and always will be, in the stage of becoming, of trying to fulfill our changing dreams and aspirations. What we can accomplish at one stage of life is different from what we can handle at another. And yet an overall design is being shaped by all our endeavors. The more willing we are to shed yet another skin, the more centered, stable, and spirit filled we'll become.

Do my actions fit my values? As I outgrow my values, I will release them. I will relish my growth today and celebrate my new skin.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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August 4

We believe in Human Ecology,
the understanding and care of human beings
as whole persons in light of their relationship
to God, themselves, their families,
and the society in which they live.
--The Philosophy of Human Ecology

The philosophy of Human Ecology covers all three aspects of our recovery: body, mind, and spirit.

We know that taking care of our bodies is essential to recovery. That means eating properly, exercising as much as we can, and not abusing ourselves physically.

Taking care of our minds is also important. We are trying to make choices that enhance our recovery, not diminish it. This includes the things we read, watch, and listen to. We seek out education and positive affirmation. We go to meetings. We gather with others who share our vision.

Spirituality is the common thread through all of this, for without it we are lost. Our spiritual search is our effort to improve our conscious contact with God. Through this search comes harmony of body, mind, and spirit.

Today let me remember the principles of Human Ecology. They provide a simple reminder of where I've been and where I am going.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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August 5

Changing our attitudes

Our prayer is, "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." We say this prayer at least once a day because, although we must accept the things we cannot change today, they may, in fact, change tomorrow.

This seems to be a paradox, yet once we truly and completely accept something, it begins to change. While the objective fact remains unchanged, our attitude toward it and our relationship to it have changed. It is with our attitudes toward people and things that we must learn to live.

Am I changing my attitudes?

Higher Power, help me live fully today, neither forward nor backward, but here and now.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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August 6

As life is action and passion, it is required of man that he should share the action and passion of his time at peril of being judged not to have lived.
--Oliver Wendell Holmes

America's greatest killer is. . . What? Car wreaks? Heart attacks? Cancer? Alcoholism? How about suffocation by a sense of inferiority? Many of us adult children have tragic personal insight into the number of alcoholic deaths that are attributed to pneumonia, congestive heart failure, or anything but alcoholism. But feelings of inferiority are just as lethal as any of these. Although they may not appear so, people who feel a deep sense of inferiority are not fully alive.

But there is ample evidence that people do love us, that we are missed when we are not around. For all the doom and gloom that may be familiar to us, aren't we surrounded also by beauty? Doesn't the sun rise each day? And don't we have it within our power to make of this day whatever we choose?

Today, I remind myself I have something to contribute.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

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August 7

"If onlys" are lonely.
--Morgan Jennings

The circumstances of our lives seldom live up to our expectations or desires. However, in each circumstance we are offered an opportunity for growth or change, a chance for greater understanding of life's heights and pitfalls. Each time we choose to lament what isn't, we close the door on the invitation to a better existence.

We simply don't know just what's best for us. Our vision is limited. Less so today than yesterday, but limited still. The experiences we are offered will fail to satisfy our expectations because we expect so much less than God has planned for us in the days ahead.

We get what we need in the way of relationships, adventures, joys and sorrows, today and every day. Celebrating what we get and knowing there is good in it eases whatever trial we are undergoing. We are cared for, right now. We need not lament what we think we need. We do have what we need. We will always get what we need, when we need it.

I will breathe deeply and relax. At this moment my every need is being attended to.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

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August 8

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me all at once.
--Jennifer Unlimited

We all need a little humor in our lives and in the way we work the program. For example, one of the first things we learn in recovery is to "take one day at a time." This is very good advice, so we practice living that way. Most days it works pretty well.

But once in a while it seems like we can't even handle one day. We just can't handle everything that happens along the way, plus carry out our own plans for the day. Perhaps we have to stop and change a flat tire. Or a friend calls and needs help. Or one of our kids has a meltdown in the grocery store. Or maybe all those things happen in the same day! That kind of day used to be our perfect excuse to get high.

Now it's a perfect excuse to take a deep breath, call our sponsor or a friend, and have a good laugh about it. Now we realize that our days are not really ours. We can plan them, but we can't really control them. That's just the way it is, and it's okay.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, please help me to pay attention to the most important things today. And please, send a few good laughs my way.

Today's Action

I will find a few things to laugh about today.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

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August 9

A good garden may have some weeds.
--Thomas Fuller

Newcomer

I've done a few things I'm not proud of, but isn't that part of being human? Other people aren't perfect either.

Sponsor

Looking honestly and unflinchingly at our behavior, while at the same time having compassion for ourselves, is a powerful combination. Steps Four through Nine offer us a simple process for clearing up the wreckage of the past so that we can live without the burden of regret. In recovery, we have the opportunity to change for the better, not to demand perfection of ourselves or others.

My perfectionism sometimes makes me forget that I'm engaged in a process of change over time. It also lets me exaggerate both how "good" and "bad" I am. If I'm not "the greatest" in some situation, I decide, in my arrogance, that I must be the "the worst." What a strange way of giving myself importance! One of the program sayings reminds me not to compare my insides with other people's outsides. I have my own unique gifts; accepting and nurturing these gifts brings me joy and allows me to contribute to the human community.

We're capable of feeling love and compassion for others who are far from perfect. In recovery, we can learn to extend that love and compassion to ourselves.

For today, I will delete "perfect" from my vocabulary and practice using the word "better."

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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August 10

Readiness is a precondition for change.

If we earnestly and conscientiously apply the tools of our program, we are certain to experience positive change. We are promised new freedom and happiness and assured that a Higher Power can and will remove our negative characteristics.

The question is, are we ready to change? If we hang on tightly to self-will, resentments, fear, mistrust, and all the other weaknesses that get in our way, our Higher Power has a tough time prying us loose. We must be prepared to let go and open ourselves to new possibilities if the change we seek is to occur.

Along with taking a daily inventory, we can cultivate the readiness to abandon our counterproductive tendencies and try something new. In this way, we cooperate with the force for positive growth that lies within each of us. We cannot command or control this force, but we can learn to be responsive to it.

Today, I am ready for positive change. I will be responsive to inner nudges that move me in that direction.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

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August 11

Without a sense of humor, you're old in a hurry.
--Janice Clark

We've all been in the company of constant complainers. They drag down the mood of everyone they encounter. Can we be accused of this demeanor on occasion too?

Maybe it seems impossible to wear a happy face all the time. And it's not always easy to laugh at ourselves, particularly when we're feeling anxious and vulnerable. However, becoming willing to see the humor in our many foibles, learning to not take ourselves so seriously is well worth the effort. The lucky ones among us learned this trait many years ago, and we recognize them instantly. We generally love being around them, too. Laughter is good medicine. Whether it's at ourselves or simply at a situation or a clever movie, laughter lightens our mood, thus lightening whatever burden we might be carrying.

When we were young, most of us had fears about financial instability, war, our children, or our careers. Life does have many serious aspects. But we were never required to handle any of them alone. If we relied on the God of our understanding, all of the burdens were more easily accepted. That gave us time to breathe more easily. Laughter was then more frequent. It can be more frequent now, too. It's simply a decision to see every circumstance with a lighter heart.

It's so much more fun to laugh than to complain. It's my choice today.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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August 12

Fall in love with life

I was sitting in the chair at the beauty shop getting my hair cut one day and listening to my beautician chatter away. She showed me a picture of one of her friends, a woman who had gotten married and recently had a baby girl.

"She's been so in love since that child was born," she said, showing me a picture of the new mother's smiling face.

"In love with her husband?" I asked.

"No," she said. "Well, that, too. I mean in love with life."

Have you ever been in love, had your heart beat fast when you anticipated the call of your lover, felt the way the sun felt warmer on your face, the sky appeared bluer, the clouds more fluffy, and the sunset more grand?

What if you could fall in love with your life and feel that way each day? I'm not saying romantic relationships are bad. They're not. They're part of being human and getting our needs met. But what if we could take all that passion and focus it into falling in love with life?

Maybe that is what is meant by universal love. Maybe that's the part we give back.

Fall in love with your life today.

God, help me feel passionate about my life and all the possibilities that stretch out before me.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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August 13

Fear imprisons, faith liberates; fear paralyzes, faith empowers; fear disheartens, faith encourage; fear sickens, faith heals; fear makes useless, faith makes serviceable.
-- Harry Emerson Fosdick

It has been said that the opposite of fear is faith. But how do we change our fears into faith if we have little or no faith? How do we start having faith? One of the easiest ways to develop an alternative to fear is to ask ourselves during a moment of fear: What is the worst that could happen? Once we know the answer to that question, we have dealt with the source of our fears - the unknown.

What do we fear now? First we need to identify all the unknowns that we fear. Once we recognize all the things that can happen, we will be able to prepare ourselves for possible failure, loss, or sadness. By recognizing the fears, we take away some of their power over us. We can then believe we will be all right.

What do I fear and why do I fear it? I know I am okay because I have identified my fear.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

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August 14

Living in the Present

One day at a time,
This is enough.
Do not look back and grieve over the past.
For it is gone. . .
And do not be troubled about the future.
For it has not yet come.
Live in the present, and make it so beautiful.
That it will be worth remembering.

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

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August 15

No one likes a martyr.

How do we feel around martyrs? Guilty, angry, trapped, negative, and anxious to get away.

Somehow, many of us have developed the belief that depriving ourselves, not taking care of ourselves, being a victim, and suffering needlessly will get us what we want.

It is our job to notice our abilities, our strengths, and take care of ourselves by developing and acting on them.

It is our job to notice our pain and weariness and appropriately take care of ourselves.

It is our job to notice our deprivation, too, and begin to take steps to give ourselves abundance. It begins inside of us, by changing what we believe we deserve, by giving up our deprivation and treating ourselves the way we deserve to be treated.

Life is hard, but we don't have to make it more difficult by neglecting ourselves. There is no glory in suffering, only suffering. Our pain will not stop when a rescuer comes, but when we take responsibility for ourselves and stop our own pain.

Today, I will be my own rescuer. I will stop waiting for someone else to work through my issues and solve my problems for me.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie