Today's Thought - September

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September 1

Do we manage ourselves to the best of our ability?

Some of us are in the program because the drinkers in our lives are out of control and we feel crazy. Others of us come to the program certain that we are managing our lives very well but hoping to learn how to better manage someone else. For some of us, the addict may have stopped using, but the feelings of hopelessness remain. Whatever our reason for being here, we are in the right place.

The program can teach us a lot if we are willing to learn. The first test of our willingness is being able to accept our powerlessness over others. Surrendering to God the management of all the other people in our lives will free us to better manage ourselves. But what does that mean? It means taking no action that we haven't talked over with a friend and with God. It means always loving and never harming the people we care about. It means never giving up the belief that our journey has purpose.

I will pay more attention to my own behavior than someone else's today. Managing me will keep me plenty busy. If I do it well, I'll be happy.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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September 2

He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare.
--Ai Ibn-Abu-Talib

When we entered recovery, we had buddies we drank or used with and people we hung out with, but often no one we could really call a friend. For a long time, we hadn't been "friend material." Too poor in body, mind, and spirit to be generous, we weren't even a friend to ourselves; how could we be a friend to someone else? Finally, we just gave up on having friends. Our attitude became, "Who needs them anyway?"

Then we began to recover and one day realized we had friends. Good friends. Friends worth loving. And the most amazing thing of all; they loved us too. We could have a friend. We could be a friend. No longer unreliable and ungenerous, we could give of ourselves. No longer needing to buy another's love, we can accept love from others. No longer suspicious about other people's motives, we can accept friendship.

In learning to love ourselves and others, we began to accept that other people could love us, too. Now we can trust ourselves to be good to our friends. With a growing circle of people to choose from, we can risk being ourselves. Knowing that whatever happens, we can handle it. What a wonderful feeling of security and confidence we have now that we've found friends.

Today help me appreciate my friends, and help me be a good friend to others.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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September 3

Practicing tolerance

Everyone has a different opinion. No two people look the same. We all are different. Differences can cause us fear and set us apart from others, and we have no idea why.

If addiction closes us down, recovery opens us up. In the program, we learn that we are all more alike than we are different. We learn to look for what we share. We learn that we know so little about ourselves (let alone others) and that judgments are not helpful.

Can I live and let live?

Higher Power, help me to see myself in others.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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September 4

A tip-off to an abusive family system is a situation in which nobody ever apologizes.
-- Karen Shaud

When we get a tip-off, we can open the door to a whole new way of looking at the world. The tip-off about apologies can help us learn to have a healthier family. It is hard to apologize, but with practice, it will get easier. We are learning that we can make mistakes, and admit them, and that other people will accept our apologies.

In the same way, we are learning we can accept others' apologies. Apologies are sometimes hard to make. It helps to keep in mind that we make them as much for ourselves and our own growth as for the person we apologize to. We are not worthless just because we make mistakes, but we increase our value to ourselves and others by being able to recognize them and apologize.

Is there an apology I need to make today?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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September 5

Change of scene has no effect upon unconscious conflicts.
--Edmund Bergler, M.D.

There's no running away from the internal strife. Whatever haunts us must finally be confronted and resolved if we're ever to grow and thus contribute to our world its due. When we keep secrets locked away, the secrets begin to keep us locked away as well.

It is folly, and yet entirely human, to think a new location, a new job, a new lover will cure whatever troubles us. The truth is, however, that whatever trips us up is at the same time trying to edge us forward to new awareness, and thus the next level of growth. Our troubles are tools for a strengthened foundation. Without them, we'd soon crumble.

When we consider the conflicts we encounter as opportunities for further development, they excite us rather than provoke anxiety. Changing our perspective can make the same scene appear quite new.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

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September 6

A single grateful thought toward heaven is the most complete prayer.
--Gotthold Ephraim Lessing

Thank you is one of the most important things we can say to anyone. Thank you packs a lot of meaning into two little words. Thank you says, "I see you. I see what you have done for me. You have been kind to me. I know it takes work to be kind. I feel special that you did the work of being kind to me. I am grateful."

Sometimes it is hard for us to say thank you because we are too busy feeling shame or sadness or anger. So what? No excuses. Those feelings are our own problems, and we know what to do about them now that we have a recovery program. No matter what is going on with us, we can always find help. And we can always be kind to others. Saying thank you is an easy way to start.

Prayer for the Day

Thank You, Higher Power. Thank You for the gift of life, for a world of natural beauty and power to live in, and for the people around me who love me and accept my love. Thank You for caring about me and helping me every day in my recovery, and please help me ask for the gift of Your help each day.

Today's Action

Today I will practice thinking "Thank You, Higher Power" every time I receive a little help or a lucky break.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

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September 7

When all else is lost, the future still remains.
--Christian Bovee

Ours is a program of hope. We sit in meetings and give each other hope. For no matter how long we have been sober - five days or thirty years - there will be times when we feel horrible. This is life. In everyone's life there are times of wonderful joy, but also times of incredible pain.

If we act from our values and the spiritual principles given to us by our Higher Power, pain will be transformed into growth and new understanding. Pain is transitory and softens with time.

These are the lessons of recovery. Bad times can be transformed into growth and joy.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, I give You my pain and I ask You to show me the lessons I'm to learn. I ask for Your help in holding on to hope. Help me to never forget that You and others are with me.

Today's Action

Today I will list the times during my active addiction that I felt most hopeless. Then I will think of what lessons I learned from these moments. How did others, my Higher Power, and I transform these moments?

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

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September 8

Life moves forward

The past is past. Over. Finished. Our job is to move with the flow of the present. We are propelled by what went before, but we do not try to swim against the current of our present lives by regretting or yearning for old times.

Each day of recovery releases us from the past and gives us a fresh start. We can put behind us the misery of compulsive behavior - we certainly don't yearn to re-experience that! Though the good times of the past will stay in our memories, our minds need to be focused on the present.

Recovery also readies us for the future: We don't fear what lies ahead, since it is in the hands of our Higher Power. Our task is to earnestly seek to know and do our Higher Power's will for us today so that we will keep moving with the stream of goodness that wends through our lives. Trust and confidence support us as we face forward.

Working my program today keeps me steady in the present and ready for the future.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

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September 9

Growth is the only evidence of life.
--John, Cardinal Newman

We should be thankful we can never reach complete serenity. If we could, we would never have the need to improve ourselves. We would stop growing, because there would be no reason to learn any more than we already know, and we would become bored. Even the things which seem so serene in nature usually contain a struggle within. A lake, with a swan gliding slowly across it, seems a perfect picture of serenity. But, unseen below the surface, fish, turtles, and frogs struggle each day for survival.

The important thing is to accept the struggles as a part of the beauty of life, not as blemishes on it.

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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September 10

Forgiveness is the key to action and freedom.
--Hannah Arendt

Resentments keep us in the past, a past that can never be relived. Resentments keep a stranglehold on our mind. They keep us from appreciating the beauty of a moment. They stop us from hearing the loving voices of friends. We forget that we have a mission to fulfill God's divine plan for our life.

Fortunately, we can shake this hold on us, and our freedom comes when we decide to forgive whatever transgressions are made against us. This decision, with some practice, can become second nature.

Clearly the choice to resent no one is our opportunity to free our mind and heart for the real activities God hopes we'll attend to. Our purpose in this life goes unfulfilled when we're consumed by resentments. Now we have a program of recovery to help us develop a forgiving heart and find the peace and joy that are part of God's will for each of us.

Holding resentments against others hurts me. Forgiveness can make me glad I'm alive today.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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September 11

We don't always understand the ways of Almighty God - the crosses sent us, the sacrifices demanded . . . But we accept with faith and resignation the holy will with no looking back, and we are at peace.
--Anonymous

Acceptance of our past, acceptance of the conditions presently in our lives that we cannot change, brings relief. It brings the peacefulness we so often, so frantically, seek.

We can put the past behind us. Each day is a new beginning. And each day of abstinence offers us the chance to look ahead with hope. A power greater than ourselves helped us to find this program. That power is ever with us. When we fear facing new situations, or when familiar situations turn sour, we can look to that power for help in saying what needs to be said and for doing what needs to be done. Our higher power is as close as our breath. Conscious awareness of its presence strengthens us, moment by moment.

The past is gone. Today is full of possibilities. With each breath I will be aware of the strength at hand.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

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September 12

Control robs us of serenity.

The Serenity Prayer, when relied on, changes the very nature of our lives. The reality is that most of our troubles result from an unwillingness to give up controlling the many people we encounter. What they are doing is seldom relevant. We simply want them to answer to us!

There is so much we cannot change. Yet our stubbornness leaves us frustrated, depressed, and in near constant conflict. Nonetheless, there is an easy solution. It's the first prayer we heard in a Twelve Step meeting. We can ask God for wisdom so we can change only what is ours to change and accept all the rest. Wisdom will come. And so will the serenity we deserve.

God, grant me serenity today, along with wisdom and acceptance, so I can fulfill your will.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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September 12

-- Will Rogers

We laugh when others do something silly. We're amused when something funny happens to them. But if the same happens to us and people laugh, we might give them the evil eye.

Yet, when others laugh, it can free us. It frees us to see the world through new eyes. Likewise, when we laugh at ourselves, we're free to see ourselves with new eyes. Instead of trying to be perfect, we accept we're human. To laugh at ourselves is to accept ourselves. There's no room for shame when we laugh. We enjoy ourselves just as we are. Can I accept the fact I'm human and I have limits?

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, when I refuse to accept that I'm only human, be gentle with me. I know that, when I least expect it, you will remind me that I'm only human.

Action for the Day

I will share with a friend one or two stories about funny mistakes I've made.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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September 14

Almost everyone wants something for nothing.
--Marsha Sinetar

Bargains attract. Finding a good value excites us, and we share the news quickly. Wanting anything for free is human nature perhaps. However, we have had to learn again and again that you get what you pay for. This is true of human interactions too.

Why do we think that others will be there for us if we aren't available for them? Having friends means being a friend, even if it's time-consuming. Although friendship's rewards are indisputable, we still tend to wait, letting the other person make the first move. Getting the other person to commit first reduces our effort, perhaps, but we will still receive according to what we give.

Knowing and utilizing this principle simplifies our lives. Once we master it, we never forget it. And what we bring to our relationships will be given back to us.

I am willing to give to others what I want in return today. Their efforts will match my own.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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September 15

The most wasted day of all is that in which we have not laughed.
--Sebastian R.N. Chamfort

When we wallowed in the self-pity of obsession, we were sure we'd never laugh again. How easy it was to weep, alone and secretly, inspired by sad music like "Born to Lose" or "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry."

What a shock it was to hear people laugh in our first few meetings! How could they laugh about something as serious as addiction? What an awakening when we were able to join the laughter.

We laughed with them as they laughed at the sad objects they once were. Today we can also laugh for pure joy at being free of restraints, and in gratitude for the resolve not to return to our old ways. We can laugh just for being alive.

Laughter is a source of growth for me. It keeps me thinking positively. It reduces the stress of problems. It tells me that any effort at progress is worthwhile. Laughter is progress.

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous