January 16

To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves.

~Will Durant

In our youth many of us heard from our mother or father, "If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all." We didn't practice this principle very well then, and many of us still don't. The real root of our struggle to speak well of others is the pain we suffer because of our low self-esteem, and diminishing another person's worth, unfortunately, gives us a moment of stolen satisfaction. But in reality, the illusion of elevating our own worth for that brief, hurtful moment dies quickly, and our remorse and shame linger on.

In God's eyes, we are all equal. To God, no one among us has more value than another.

Praying for knowledge of this understanding every day will relieve our compulsion to diminish someone else. And even more importantly, it will help us understand our equality and value in this living universe.

I will see worth and value in myself and everyone else today.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care: Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery*

January 17

Anger

I was angry with my foe. I told it not. My wrath did grow.

~William Blake

Anger is a common defect in our attitudes and personalities. Like all other character defects, anger grows more harmful the longer it is contained within ourselves. Unless we expose it freely for others to see, it can consume all our good intentions. We must "get the monkey off our backs before it reaches for our throats."

How can we possibly make peace and form worthwhile relationships unless we bring anger into the open by working Steps Four, Five, Six, and Seven? Letting go of hidden anger and returning to a stable state of mind is the first step in finding a comfortable peace with life. We find that "letting it all out" through the Steps is the way to become free and happy. We continue to take daily personal assessments of our spiritual growth by monitoring our anger.

When I become angry, I'll count to ten and deal with my anger in an appropriate way.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It: A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations*

January 18

All the fame I look for in life is to have lived it quietly.

~Michel de Montaigne

The desire for fame can often be distracting. We can be so busy striving to be recognized that we lose sight of ourselves. What comes to mind is what other people think of us; we defer to their opinion and neglect our own intimate view of ourselves.

Being well-thought-of is fine and good ... as long as we think well of ourselves. We need to tend our own garden and love what grows therein. Having it admired by the neighbors is nice but not always necessary.

A quiet life brings us into touch with ourselves. We come to realize how much we are worth in our own eyes. With this confidence in ourselves, we can reach out and love - not because we are empty and needy, but because we believe in our own uniqueness and value.

I resolve to seek quietness and the love that springs from self-knowledge.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart

January 19

Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.

~Lida Clarkson

We all want life to unfold according to our plan. After all, we are certain we know what's best for us. But hindsight quickly reminds us that few, if any, of us had included recovery in a Twelve Step program as part of our life's plan.

Yet here we are, and we are now more content than we've ever been in our lives. How did this happen? We have come to accept that God has worked in our lives in spite of ourselves. We have been protected and guided all along the way, even though on occasion we stubbornly attempted to force open doors that were not beneficial to our growth. Fortunately, our Higher Power never gave up on us. We will fulfill our purpose with all the help we need when the time is right.

Remembering that opportunities come to us when their time is right allows us to wait and trust.

My patience will pay off today. I can be certain that what comes to me today is on time.

Today's reading is from the book A Woman's Spirit: More meditations for Women*

January 20

Learn by practice.

~Martha Graham

We were practicing addicts. We were working to perfect our craft; we were good at being addicts. Let us practice recovery with the same intensity. We need to practice the Steps. We need to work to deepen our relationship with them. We must practice patience and tolerance with ourselves and others.

Remember we're working to be in this for the long haul. We seek humility not perfection, progress not perfection. We seek to learn and better ourselves at being ordinary people. We seek to enjoy the journey, knowing it will never be over. And as we practice and learn, we step deeper into life and sobriety.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, each day help me show up for practice and enjoy the process of learning.
Today's Action

At the end of today, I will take some time and ask, "What did I learn today that will help me live a good, sober life? What will I practice at tomorrow?"

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me: More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple*

January 21

AA Thought for the Day

It’s been proved that we alcoholics can't get sober by our willpower. We've failed again and again. Therefore, I believe there must be a Higher Power which helps me. I think of that power as the grace of God. And I pray to God every morning for the strength to stay sober today. I know that power is there because it never fails to help me. Do I believe that AA works through the grace of God?
Meditation for the Day

Once I am "born of the spirit," that is my life's breath. Within me is the life of life, so that I can never perish. The life that down the ages has kept God's children through peril, adversity, and sorrow. I must try never to doubt or worry, but follow where the life of the spirit leads. How often, when little I know it, God goes before me to prepare the way, to soften a heart, or to overrule a resentment. As the life of the spirit grows, natural wants become less important.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that my life may become centered in God more than in self. I pray that my will may be directed toward doing His will.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day: A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life*

January 22

Then Bacchus ... gave him the choice of making a wish come true ... So Midas said, "Make everything I touch turn gold."

~Ovid

Poor King Midas, already rich as a king, was made poorer by his poor wish. Everything he touched: small shoots, wet clay, a ripe head of wheat, apples from a tree - all suddenly went bad, turned into gold, pure gold. And how could he eat when bread and fruits, even fresh running water, suddenly shined at him, yellow, hard, and cold? He could have wished for a wiser, smaller success.

He could have had all familiar things turn kind at his touch, or loving and good. Then imagine how he would have touched everyone he came near.

If some wishes are too good to be true, are others too bad?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families*

January 23

This above all: To thine own self be true.

~William Shakespeare

Sometimes we hear that we have a "selfish program." In our case, being selfish means that we ask for help when we need it. We go only to places that are safe for us, no matter what others are doing. Being selfish comes to mean safety for us.

Being selfish doesn't mean we act like brats. We must act in ways that show respect and love - for ourselves and for others. Being selfish means we do what is good for us. What is good for us? First, we have to save our lives by stopping our drinking and drugging. Next, we start working the Steps. We come to know a loving Higher Power. This is how we come to know our true self. And this is why our AA medallions include the words "To thine own self be true."
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me be true to myself and my values. Help me be "selfish" about spending time to talk with You each day.
Action for the Day

I'll list ten ways I need to be "selfish" in recovery. If I get stuck, I'll be selfish and ask for help.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple: Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal*

January 24

The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be either good or evil.

~Hannah Arendt

How often have we found ourselves in a predicament and innocently saying, "How did I get into this?" When someone has been injured by our actions because we failed to think about them, do we take the responsibility? If a friend is unfairly treated on the job, do we take a stand for him? When we know people are starving, what do we do about it? When our loved ones say they are lonely and wish we would talk to them, how do we respond?

In this program, we have chosen to live by our values. We cannot sit passively and fail to live up to those values. Each situation is different, so we must think about what is called for. When we do not think about our reactions, we are in danger of adding to the evil in the world. When we act on our principles, we feel more hopeful and wholesome.

Today, I will be alert to the difference between good and evil in my actions. I pray for the strength to take a stand.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men*

January 25

Never Question Your Worthiness

Brené Brown says that we all deserve love and belonging, and that our worthiness is our birthright. Louder for the people in the back: our worthiness is our birthright. I love how solid, simple, and complete that phrase is. We don't have to prove our worthiness. We don't have to hustle or fight for it. We are worthy just through the simple act of being born.

Those of us in recovery need to work hard to stop questioning whether we are worthy or not of ... anything. We deserve to be loved by our partner, our children, other family members, friends, and other important people in our life. We are worthy of forgiveness for what I like to call "the **** we did." We are worthy of respect and equality and health care and all the services we each need to heal. Don't question your worthiness, if you are still doing that. Just claim it.

Operating from a place of knowing we are worthy frees up a whole lot of time and energy.

Today's reading is from the book She Recovers Every Day: Meditations for Women*

January 26

Changing our ways

We must be willing to grow in understanding. When we were using, we understood everything in one way, a way that caused us pain and misery. When we quit drinking or using other drugs, we began to see things in another way.

This new way of seeing things means we've had to make some changes in our way of living, and any new way of thinking means new ways of being. Are we willing to make the changes in our living that correspond with our new ways of thinking?

Am I changing my ways of living?

Higher Power, give me the courage, belief, and willingness I need to allow change to take place in my life.

One way of living that I will change today is...

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*

January 27

Family Consequences

My daughter was noticeably impacted by my drinking. She developed some anger at me for more or less emotionally abandoning her for all those years. One of the ways she coped with my drinking was to try and fix me. I'd be passed out on the couch, and she would go into the trash can and get all the empty beer cans, and lay them on my chest and spread them out. So when I came to, or woke up, beer cans would go flying.

That was her way of saying, Hey, go quit this ****. But thankfully, she's been supportive of me in recovery. That's another thing I have to be grateful for.

Today I will remember the past without regret, because I have made changes to stay sober today.

~Mike D., U.S. Marine Corps, 1970–1974

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*

Janaury 28

Reflection for the Day

When we first came to the program, whether for ourselves or under pressure from others, some of us were all but sickened by the concept of "surrender." To admit to defeat flew in the face of our lifelong beliefs. And so we secretly vowed, at first, that the very idea of surrender was unthinkable. Have I truly come to believe that only through utter defeat am I able to take the first step toward liberation and strength? Or do I still harbor reservations about the principle of "letting go and letting God"?
Today I Pray

May I really believe that the complete surrender of my whole being to a Higher Power is the way to serenity. My Higher Power alone has the power to make me be and feel whole, so I can only be whole through my Higher Power. May I do away with any feelings of wanting to "hold out" and never admit defeat. May I unlearn the old adage that tells me I must "never give up" and realize that such pridefulness could keep me from recovery.
Today I Will Remember

From wholly one with my Higher Power to whole.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

January 29

We do not have to handle our problems alone.

Thinking that we needed no one's help made us feel strong and proud. We were capable, we were good managers, we had the answers. It's not easy to accept that our perceived ability to manage may well have been a facade for gross unmanageability and excessive control! Our attempts to handle the lives of too many people may have been our way of denying that other people had problems that were theirs to fix.

Help for solving problems comes wrapped in many dressings. Seeking help doesn't mean we have to let someone else force us to do something against our will. It does prove we're growing. We're learning that two heads are generally better than one, and we're coming to believe that wherever "two or more are gathered," God’s presence will guide us.

We no longer will have to handle our problems alone if we seek the steady, loving guidance of sponsors, friends, and God. The real gift is that we'll feel strong once again, and we'll know why.

I will feel strong and capable today if I am willing to listen to others and to God when I have a problem to solve.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

January 30

This laboring through what is still undone, as though, legs bound, we hobbled along the way, is like the awkward walking of the swan.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

How close to perfection will we have to come before we're satisfied with our relationships, work, and creative efforts? Some see every ragged edge, unsolved problem, or obstacle as evidence of failure. We may criticize ourselves even more harshly than we do others. We forget that we are works in progress, that our defects don't keep others from loving us.

None of us has reached perfection. Our journeys - including bumps and ruts in the road, including failures that have been our teachers - have made us more human, more compassionate toward others. We must view ourselves realistically and tenderly. To make mistakes is a part of our lives as they unfold and blossom. We can let go of the myth of perfection and begin to live with greater spontaneity and pleasure.

Today, I accept what's good, even though it may not be perfect.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day