When one alcoholic/addict shares with another alcoholic/addict

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, I choose to be happy. Just for today, I choose to get off the computer and go out and enjoy the day.

So many times we blame others for our choices. My mother use to say, "Look at what you made me do." My husband would say, "Well I wouldn't have done that if you had only done what I asked."

In recovery, I no longer have to give up my power. When I surrender my day to my Higher Power, I can make healthy choices. I can tap into the Source and live my life to it's fullest, not marking time, waiting for other, more importantly, not waiting on others, when it isn't good for me.
I need to help and give to others, yet I need to give nurturing and care to myself. I can't give away what I don't have.

Life is often how we look at it!

Have fun, enjoy your day. Make a choice to let your Inner Child come out to play.

Share the love, remember to give and receive.

No matter how hard you attempt to control the people in your life, you will not find your fulfillment there. If they don't change, you will be frustrated; if they do change under your pressure, they will be frustrated.

If I look to others for fulfillment, I will never be fulfilled.

- Pocket Sponsor

For so many years, I lived my life through others. If they would only do what I 'told' them to do or 'thought' they should do, what a wonderful place my world would be.

I hinged my world onto theirs and my happiness depended on them and I put my life on hold, waiting for them to see the light.

I manipulated, conned, hinted, etc. my way into a soul sickness that was just as unhealthy as theirs were. It was no longer about them, it was about me.

I had to turn my thinking and obsessive ways over to my Higher Power and ask for help. I had to learn to work the slogan "Live and Let Live" into my life. The key word "Live" my own life and let them live theirs.

I would try to control my actions and thoughts, when in fact, all I had to do was turn them over to my Higher Power and through Him/Her, learn to live a better way of life.


It not only made me sick trying to control my alcoholic/addict, it made me sick, trying to control my own life.

I didn't realize that control was an illusion and as much as I thought I was in control, it just wasn't so. I had to learn to turn things over to my Higher Power and allow things to unfold as He would have them be.

I did the foot work. I had the dreams and ideals, yet often they were not reality and often if I had gotten them, what would I have done with it!

I have to chuckle when I go to buy a Lotto 649 Jackpot. If it is over 3 million $s, I tend to doubt whether I should buy one, what if I won it? I can see keeping a M$ for myself and giving one each to my sister's but after that, really don't have much use for all that money. What if I decided I could now 'afford' to drink and keep myself in the style I would like to become accustomed to. Would all that money change my priorities? That is a scary thought.

It isn't about the A in my life, it is about me and my attitude and my thinking that can get me into trouble. Best to turn it over to my HP who is much more qualified to handle it.

I am granted freedom of choice in today. It is what I do with that choice that makes a difference in my life today.

[MajestyJo]

Space to explore

"No one can find his work, what he really wants to put all of himself into, when everything he does he is made to do by others. This kind of searching must be done freely or not at all."

-- John Holt

We all need space -- free from demands, deadlines, expectations and judgments -- to explore who we are and what life is all about. Free time, with absolutely no agenda, is rich with potential. How can we grow if we have no space and freedom to dream?

"Deny children -- or anyone else -- the chance to do ‘nothing,’ and we may be denying them the chance to do ‘something’ -- to find and do any work that is truly important to themselves or to someone else."

-- John Holt

I realize that I was never allowed my space and I didn't know how to make a decision for myself. We can't know what we have never been taught and we pass on our shortcomings to our children. We did the best we could with what we had, but sometimes, we fell short of who we would like to be.

A friend once told me that I was an easy 'mark' and I had to change those old behaviors and habits.

[MajestyJo]

When I visited my friend tonight, her son came in to see her. You just never know when you are going to get a chance to carry the message.

I found myself saying, "You can't expect to know what you have never been taught." I was also able to give my little spiel on acceptance. I don't have to like it, but I do have to accept it or I stay stuck.

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[MajestyJo]

"Watch your thoughts, they become words;
Watch your words, they become actions;
Watch your actions, they become habits;
Watch your habits, they become character;
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. "

- Tom Robbins -


Picking up substances that were not good for me

Running away from the reality of my life and everywhere I went, I took me with me.

I used relationships so I could focus on them instead of me. I depended on them to fill the emptiness inside and give me the happiness and fulfillment I wanted but didn't think I really deserved.

For so many years I blamed others for the problems in my life and I believe I was a product of my environment. I always wanted to fit in and belong and did many things that were not healthy choices. I lost my spiritual values and integrity as a result of habits I picked up along my way, and my destiny finally brought me to the doors of recovery. It took me a long time to get here, I was lucky the door was still open. Even luckier, that I lived to walk through it.

What you put out, comes back to you. I believe a thought is a prayer. Sending good thoughts to everyone this holiday season.

[MajestyJo]

This is why I can't compare. Even holidays in recovery are best left in the past.

Just have to remember to take my God with me.

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