Thought For Today - October

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An Unreasonable Request

When someone makes an unreasonable request, how do you respond? Do you say no, not possible?

Mostly, what works is a clear and confident no. But you may want to give a little explanation of why you're refusing their current request, without over explaining your reasoning. This gives them the opportunity to understand what's going on for you.

Sometimes, what works, is to avoid responding with a quick no. You may want to say that you'll think about it, and get back to them with a response at a later time. This gives you the opportunity to show respect for their request.

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Get in Sync

Values inform our choices, add meaning to our actions and definition to our character, but do we really use our values? Are our actions in sync with our values, at all times?

Get in sync with your values, even when no one is looking, even when the choice isn't easy. Use your values and make life valuable.

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The Dextify Response

When you’re in the middle of a difficult conversation and you’re being challenged, it’s so easy to dextify, Defend, EXplain and jusTIFY!

Of course, there’s a time to defend, explain and justify. But most often, dextifying is not the best response. It almost always sounds like you’re making excuses and it just digs you into a deeper hole.

So before you dextify, pause to consider a) if there is some truth to what the other person is saying, b) the most appropriate response. Maybe give a little explanation or say, “Thank you. I'll look into it.”

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The Happiness Decision

Happiness is not a dependency. You don’t actually need anything to be happy. It’s not something that comes from outside. Happiness is a decision. Decide to be happy now.

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Know Your Purpose

What's your purpose? Is it making a difference, experiencing life fully or something completely different?

For most people, purpose is invariably connected to giving. So, think about what it is you would like to give.

Know your purpose and reconnect with it, at least once a day. This will remind you to live your life purposefully.

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Maintaining Positivity

When someone is behaving negatively towards you, it's a challenge not to mirror their attitude or behavior.

Challenge yourself to look beyond the negativity, look for the positive in them and then create positive thoughts and feelings for them. Your positive attitude allows them to reconnect with their own positivity. Even if you don't see any effect, maintain your attitude and not only will you feel more positive, but you'll also deal with that person more positively.

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A Load on your Mind

Are you carrying a heavy backpack? Not on your back, but on your mind? Carrying a heavy load, weighs us down, slows us down & makes life more challenging to navigate.

So stop struggling & take the backpack off. Let go of any memories, feelings & attitudes that no longer serve you any purpose.

Lighten the load & you'll feel lighter, move ahead, & make life more fun to navigate.

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Being Honest with Yourself

Are you always honest about yourself, to yourself? When we're not honest with ourselves, it creates a subtle tension.

To improve your level of honesty, take time at the end of the day or the end of the week to reflect and journal. Be honest with yourself about who you are and why you do what you do.

When we’re honest with ourselves, there's a deeper level of relaxation. This allows us to be more authentic, transparent and accountable.

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Honor your Energy

You honor your time and money right? Well, energy too, is one of your most precious resources. So honor your energy by managing it well, and exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthily, get enough sleep....

When you go into an energy deficit, make time and space to recover your energy. Double everything you think you need and get your energy back.

Honor your energy and manage it well, and not only will you feel good but you’ll also manage everything else well.

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Saying Yes or No

Are you quick to say ‘yes’ to everyone and everything? Yes. No wonder you’re feeling frazzled and fried!

Try slowing down the quick ‘yes’ response. Slow down to choose wisely when to say 'yes' or 'no'. Make the choice and then say it and mean it.

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Soul at Work

The soul is the deepest aspect of the self from which creativity, intuition, caring, compassion, meaning and purpose flow. Bring all of you to work – your body, heart and soul. Integrate and align who you are, what you do and what you value.

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Always Running Late?

Are you always running around, running behind, running late? If you would like to be on time, to arrive on time, then it’s time to take control. How?

1. Avoid leaving things to the last minute. Plan realistically. Prepare beforehand.
2. Allow extra time for any unexpected delays. If you arrive early, use the time to relax
or catch up on some work.
3. Understand that being on time reflects well on you. It shows that you respect other
people's time as well as your own.

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Appreciation for your work

When we put our work out into the world, we want it to be appreciated. But sometimes it all goes unnoticed and sometimes some people just don't get what we do.

Now, you don't really have control over how people will respond to what you do. So appreciate what you do and once you've put your work out there into the world, let it go. If there's feedback, learn from it. If there's appreciation, appreciate it, and if nothing happens, don't let that diminish what you do.

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Bitter to Better

Ever been broken hearted or been through an adversity that leaves you feeling bitter? Next time you’re feeling bitter, go from bitter to better. How? Accept how you feel and how things are. And then do things that will make you feel better.

Find a way to feel better, not bitter, and you'll feel hopeful that things will get better.

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Involving Others in Decision Making... or Not

When making decisions, do you get others involved? Especially if they're affected by the decisions?

Involving others in the decision making, can often make the process longer because of all the different personalities & opinions. But it can also make those involved in making the decision, feel more valued. And improve the decision because of all the different knowledge & skills.

Decide when to make decisions on your own & when to involve others in the decision making.

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Where Thoughts Come From

We think a lot. Some of its positive, some negative, some frightening, some enlightening. Where do our thoughts come from? Do they simply leap into our mind or are they triggered by something? TV, tasks, music, memories, podcasts, people...?

Just as our thinking affects everything, everything affects our thinking. So, know where your thoughts come from.

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Team Together

When we're working in a team, it's easy to put all the responsibility on the team leader. But we're all responsible!

If we all take responsibility for not just the task, but also for working better together and creating a positive team environment, we'd have greater success

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Cool Anger

When there’s a fire, the most urgent thing to do is to try to put the flames out, not worry about how the fire started. In the same way, when someone’s angry, instead of adding fuel to the fire and making things worse or heating up and getting angry yourself – put out the fire. Become cool and create ‘cooling thoughts.’ ‘Cool’ the other person down by sending them good vibrations and good feelings.

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A Quick Trick to Boost Confidence

No matter how confident we are, we all experience the occasional blip in our confidence. The next time you need an instant boost of confidence, try this simple, quick trick: smile.

Smile. It might be tentative to start with, but as you put your heart into it and really smile - not only will it make you feel better, but it will also kick start your confidence and also, make you look more confident.

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Asking For Help

You may want to do it all by yourself and manage it all alone. But you don't have to. If you need help, ask for it. Reach out and ask the right person for a little assistance, a little support.

If you're holding back from asking for help when you need it, you may need to remind your ego that it's OK to ask for help. It's actually smart, because it gives you a chance to value the person helping you and a chance to get things done faster and better.

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Walking Broadcasters

Did you know that we’re all walking broadcasters?

Whatever is going on inside of us, our thoughts and feelings, broadcast loud and clear, all the time - whether we like it or not! There’s no on-off switch. So, keep your thoughts and feelings in check, and broadcast what you want.

What are you broadcasting right now?

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Giving Up, Keeping Going

You’ve probably given up on lot of things before. Giving up on the right things, for the right reasons is often the right choice.

But if you're thinking about giving up on things that matter, then maybe you need to think about a) giving up the desire to give up and b) finding a way to keep going.

Do you know when to give up and when to keep going?

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The Extra Hour

This weekend, in the UK, the clocks go back one hour. This gives us an extra hour to enjoy and do whatever we want. Get an extra hour of sleep. Catch up on some of the little things we never have time for. Or do something fun or something special.

What will you do with your extra hour?

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36 Hour Weekend

Between 6pm Friday and 6am Monday there’s 60 hours. Let’s say you sleep for 24 of those hours, even then you have 36 hours. What do you do in those 36 hours? How will you make the most of your 36 hours?

Here are a few suggestions: Do something relaxing to recover from the week. Do something fun and different to rejuvenate yourself. Make time for people who matter. Make time for solitude and introspection. And most importantly, avoid doing too many chores over the weekend; maybe get some chores done on one or two weekday evenings.

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The Present Moment

When the mind continuously dwells on the past, we miss out on the opportunities of the present. So, if you’re still thinking about something you don’t need to be thinking about – stop! Remind yourself: time is too precious to waste on time-wasting thoughts. Become present and take the opportunity to use the present moment well.

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Brush Your Mind

You wouldn't go a day without brushing your teeth, right? Treat your mind like you treat your teeth.

While you brush your teeth, how about also brushing your mind, keeping both your teeth and mind clean and healthy. Brush away all the negativity and leave your mind refreshed.

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Greeting Tasks

Greet every task. Welcome it into your day, and you're ready to give it your focus, apply your skills, and approach the task enthusiastically.

And when you are done, bid it farewell. This gives you a moment to acknowledge your efforts and what you've accomplished, and get you ready for what's next.

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Forgive Yourself

Often we dwell on past mistakes and regrets, replaying the memories over and over in our mind. This doesn’t help us nor does it change what happened. Instead, forgive yourself.

Forgive yourself and you'll free yourself from any guilt, shame, resentment, and disappointment. This will help you to accept the past, learn from your mistakes and regrets, make amends and move on.

Forgive yourself. It’s one of the best things you can do for your head, heart and health.

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Express Yourself

Only a tiny percentage of communication is expressed through our words. The rest of the communication is through our facial expressions, gestures, the tone and volume of our voice, and through our attitude and behavior.

So, what you are communicating? How are you expressing yourself?

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Things are Looking Down

When things are looking down, here's a simple way to boost your mood, look up. Look up in the sky. Look up at the clouds, the sun. Look up at the stars, the moon. Look up at the buildings, the trees.

Look up. It may help you put things into perspective and help you feel better, even if it's just for a moment.

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Be Here

Are you here, or is your mind somewhere else? We all know the feeling of being here, in the moment. You may have experienced it when gardening, playing sports, fixing something....

If your mind is somewhere else, bring it back. Be here, in the moment, and you’re more likely to experience calm, respond to life thoughtfully and take delight in everyday activities.