View Full Version : Daily Recovery Readings - July
bluidkiti
06-30-2015, 08:34 AM
July 1
Daily Reflections
THE BEST FOR TODAY
The principles we have set down are guides to progress.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 60
Just as a sculptor will use different tools to achieve desired effects in
creating a work of art, in Alcoholics Anonymous the Twelve Steps are
used to bring about results in my own life. I do not overwhelm myself
with life's problems, and how much more work needs to be done. I let
myself be comforted in knowing that my life is now in the hands of my
Higher Power, a master craftsman who is shaping each part of my life
into a unique work of art. By working my program I can be satisfied,
knowing that in the doing the best that we can for today, we are
doing all that God asks of us."
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In following the A.A. program with its twelve steps, we have the
advantage of a better understanding of our problems. Day after day
our sobriety results in the formation of new habits, normal habits. As
each twenty-four-hour period ends, we find that the business of staying
sober is a much less trying and fearsome ordeal than it seemed in the
beginning. Do I find it easier as I go along?
Meditation For The Day
Learn daily the lesson of trust and calm in the midst of the storms of
life. Whatever of sorrow or difficulty the day may bring, God's
command to you is the same. Be grateful, humble, calm, and loving to
all people. Leave each soul the better for having met you or heard
you. For all kinds of people, this should be your attitude: a loving
desire to help and an infectious spirit of calmness and trust in God.
You have the answer to loneliness and fear, which is calm faith in the
goodness and purpose in the universe.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be calm in the midst of storms. I pray that I may pass
on this calmness to others who are lonely and full of fear.
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As Bill Sees It
The Reality of Spiritual Experiences, p. 182
"Perhaps you raise the question of hallucination versus the divine imagery of a genuine
spiritual experience. I doubt if anyone has authoritatively defined what a hallucination
really is. However, it is certain that all recipients of spiritual experiences declare their
reality. The best evidence of that reality is in the subsequent fruits. Those who receive
these gifts of grace are very much changed people, almost invariably for the better. This
can scarcely be said of those who hallucinate.
"Some might think me presumptuous when I say that my own experience is real.
Nevertheless, I can surely report that in my own life and in the lives of countless others,
the fruits of that experience have been real, and the benefactions beyond reckoning.
Talk, 1960
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Walk In Dry Places
Are we victimizing ourselves?
Finding the New Happiness
Some believe that people create their own trouble by attracting the wrong conditions and people in their lives. This may not be entirely true, but we can find that some element of it was at work with us. Time and time again during our drinking, we set ourselves up for abuse and rejection, though our motives seemed right.
Why did we do this? Supposedly to punish ourselves, the theory has it.
If this is true, then we should now call a halt to the process immediately. If we've emerged from the terrors of alcoholism, we've had all the punishment anybody needs.
We can change our bad patterns by looking carefully at the people and situations we seem to attract. Without resentment or condemnation, we can part company with any problems these have been bringing us. We can
start building new relationships and attracting better conditions that will be immensely successful in terms of happiness and well-being.
I'll remember today that in the new life I'm seeking, there's no need for punishment. I will not go out of my way to attract people or conditions that create problems in my life.
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Keep It Simple
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.---Step Seven
In Step Six, we got ready to give up our shortcomings. In Step Seven, we ask God to remove them. There is one catch. We humbly as God to remove them.
Being humble means we remember who we are: human beings who need God's help. Being humble means not pretending we're God. We admit we need God's help. Being humble means seeing ourselves as we are. We're a small but important part of God's plan. We can change much, but only God can change some things about us. This is why we ask. Being humble is not a weakness, but a true strength.
Prayer for the Day: God, please remove my shortcomings.
Action for the Day: Throughout the day, I'll pray to God to remove my shortcomings.
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Each Day a New Beginning
It's quite uncomfortable to be an adolescent at age thirty-two. --Peggy Cahn
Our lives are in process every moment, which means change is ever-present. As new information is sorted and acquired, old habits are discarded. We don't let go of some old behaviors easily, however. They are like comfortable shoes. They may be worn thin, and they probably embarrass us in certain company, but we slip them on unconsciously and then it's too late.
Maturity is an "as if" behavior, initially. Emotional development was stunted, for most of us, with the onset of our addictive behavior, thus, we often respond to situations like adolescents. Application of the "as if" principle will result both in new personal attitudes and unfamiliar, yet welcome, responses from others. Acting as if we are capable, strong, confident, or serene will pave the way for making those behaviors real, after a time. If we believe in ourselves and our ability to become the women we strive to be, we can then move forward confidently.
When my behavior embarrasses or shames me, I will accept the responsibility for changing it. Changing it offers immediate rewards. The people around me will react in refreshing ways, and I'll feel more fully alive.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee--Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.
p. 85
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.
I figured I'd be all right if I could find something I liked to do. So when the children were in school from nine to three, I started up a nice little business and was fairly successful in it. But not happy. Because I found that everything I turned to became a substitute for drink. And when all of life is a substitute for drink, there's no happiness, no peace. I still had to drink; I still needed that drink. Mere cessation from drinking is not enough for an alcoholic while the need for that drink goes on. I switched to beer. I had always hated beer but now I grew to love it. So that wasn't my answer either.
p. 299
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
By now the newcomer has probably arrived at the following conclusions: that his character defects, representing instincts gone astray, have been the primary cause of his drinking and his failure at life; that unless he is now willing to work hard at the elimination of the worst of these defects, both sobriety and peace of mind will still elude him; that all the faulty foundation of his life will have to be torn out and built anew on bedrock. Now willing to commence the search for his own defects, he will ask, "Just how do I go about this? How do I take inventory of myself?"
p. 50
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I welcome solitude into my life today. I welcome the peace, serenity,
wisdom and spirituality I find when I take that special time for me.
--Ruth Fishel
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you
plant.
--Robert Louis Stevenson
"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we
give."
--Norman MacEwan
We're not invited into relationship with God at a deeper level in the
absence of our challenges, but in the midst of all of life, including our
challenges. Difficulties provide us a chance for greater closeness.
Every situation in life carries with it an incredible opportunity for
sweetness, depth and wonder. Receive every experience today as an
opportunity and a gift.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"It is easy enough to be pleasant, When life flows by like a song,
But the man worth while is the one who can smile, When everything
goes dead wrong. For the test of the heart is troubled, And it always
comes with the years. And the smiles that is worth the praises of
earth, Is the smile that shines through tears."
--Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold
well.
--Josh Billings
"Character is what you are in the dark."
--Dwight L. Moody
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
BELIEF
"Seek not to understand that you
may believe, but believe that you
understand."
--St. Augustine
For years I tried to understand my behavior around alcohol and I only
came away more confused. Sometimes my efforts to understand led
me into dishonesty and manipulation. I drank because I was lonely,
angry, happy, overworked or because I had problems with my parents.
You see, I tried to understand "why"!
Science has no definitive answer as to why some people are alcoholic
other than to postulate the disease factor, with the emphasized advice,
"Don't pick up the first drink." So today I don't understand why I am
an alcoholic. I also believe that I can never drink alcohol without
having alcohol problems. This cherished belief keeps me sober and
gives me a God I can understand; a life that I can love; and a world I
can live in.
Oh yes -- and I can remember where I have been today!
Help me to believe in what I know and to be content with the
imperfection of my knowledge.
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"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am."
John 14:1-3
"Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path."
Psalms 119:105
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Daily Inspiration
It's easy to give up, but no matter what the outcome is, if you do your best, you are always the winner. Lord, may I truly realize that it is the way I participate in life that counts for me.
Example is the best way to teach. Lord, may I teach Your goodness by the way I live my life.
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NA Just For Today
A Simple Program
"The program is simply sharing, working the Twelve Steps, attending meetings, and practicing the principles of the program."
Basic Text, p.188
Our complicated lives can be made a lot less complicated if we concentrate on a few simple things-sharing our experience, strength, and hope with others, regular meeting attendance, and practicing the principles of the program in our daily lives.
By sharing our experience, strength, and hope with other addicts, we provide a powerful example for newcomers to follow. The effort we put into helping others also helps keep self centeredness, the core of our disease, at bay.
Many of us pick one group, a "home group" whose meetings we attend faithfully. This regularity gives some routine to our lives, and lets others know where they can find us if they need us.
Practicing the Twelve Steps in our daily lives makes the difference between a balanced recovery and simply not using. The steps give us some much-needed guidance in managing our everyday affairs.
Yes, we are complex people. But the NA program simplifies our lives, enabling us to live a life free from active addiction. Our lives can be filled with serenity and hope when we live by the guidance of the simple principles of our program.
Just for today: I will remember that, while I am a complex person, NA is the simplest way for me to make my life less complicated.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts. --Rachel Carson
Beauty is everywhere. It is in the daisies, in the lavender wildflowers, in the new green grass of spring. As we walk through life, noticing such beauty strengthens us. It reminds us of the spiritual creative force alive in this world On better days, we can feel our own creativity gaining power from such beauty. On harder days, nature's sunset can help us step out of our suffering for a moment to be comforted and inspired by its splendor.
Even storms, in their wild and angry way, show us a power greater than ourselves. Such awesome beauty is beyond our understanding, and yet it is part of the earth we live on.
What lessons will nature teach me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking. Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk. --Raymond Inmon
We all seek creative ideas from time to time - perhaps when we have a problem resting heavily on our minds, or when we are simply in a bad mood. We need to refresh ourselves at those times. Refreshment doesn't solve a problem, but it can revitalize our thinking. Sometimes when we are feeling hopeless, we neglect to care for ourselves, forgetting a better environment will give us a stronger attitude, even toward the most difficult problems.
We must learn our own best methods for being refreshed - ways that allow angels to whisper to us. They should be simple, inexpensive, and accessible daily. Going for a walk is a very good example. Daily reading and study is another possibility. Observing nature, doing handicrafts or hobbies are refreshing for some men. These activities allow us to temporarily set aside our tasks and concerns and open us to creative ideas.
Today, I will give myself a creative break from the concerns I am facing.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It's quite uncomfortable to be an adolescent at age thirty-two. --Peggy Cahn
Our lives are in process every moment, which means change is ever-present. As new information is sorted and acquired, old habits are discarded. We don't let go of some old behaviors easily, however. They are like comfortable shoes. They may be worn thin, and they probably embarrass us in certain company, but we slip them on unconsciously and then it's too late.
Maturity is an "as if" behavior, initially. Emotional development was stunted, for most of us, with the onset of our addictive behavior, thus, we often respond to situations like adolescents. Application of the "as if" principle will result both in new personal attitudes and unfamiliar, yet welcome, responses from others. Acting as if we are capable, strong, confident, or serene will pave the way for making those behaviors real, after a time. If we believe in ourselves and our ability to become the women we strive to be, we can then move forward confidently.
When my behavior embarrasses or shames me, I will accept the responsibility for changing it. Changing it offers immediate rewards. The people around me will react in refreshing ways, and I'll feel more fully alive.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Receiving
Here is an exercise.
Today let someone give to you. Let someone do something nice for you. Let someone give you a compliment or tell you something good about yourself. Let someone help you.
Then, stand there and take it. Take it in. Feel it. Know that you are worthy and deserving. Do not apologize. Do not say, "You shouldn't have." Do you feel guilty, afraid, ashamed, and panicky? Do not immediately try to give something back.
Just say, "Thank you."
Today, I will let myself receive one thing from someone else, and I will let myself be comfortable with that.
Today I will listen to the messages that go on in my head and decide for myself if they are healthy. Today I will choose to follow positive messages that I tell myself or create new messages that are positive and healthy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Embrace Each Cycle of Your Life
It took me a long time to accept wearing glasses. I am still surprised when I need my spectacles to read a menu or scan the telephone directory. Sometimes I look in the mirror expecting to see the body, the face of my youth because I remember her. She’s still in me.
Now I’m learning to welcome aging, as each decade of life brings its own challenges, joys, sorrows, and teachings. I’m learning to trust the lessons of each cycle of my life. I don’t fear aging, for I know that it’s as much, and as important, a part of life as my youth.
“My mother just had her seventieth birthday,” the woman at the lodge told me. “My sister and I asked her what she wanted. She wanted a wet suit for diving because waterskiing had strained her back.”
What does getting older mean to you?
Young and old. All part of the same. Each moment is a moment of life, your life. Each cycle has its lessons. Dig out your glasses, if you must, but laugh whe you do it. And remember to make each moment count.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Learn to say how it feels
He no longer dreamed of storms, nor of women, nor of great occurrences, nor of great fish, nor fights, nor contests of strength, nor of his wife. He only dreamed of places now and of the lions on the beach.
–Ernest Hemingway
Many teachers of our time attribute consciousness– energy not just matter– to all creations that exist in God’s marvelous world. Many teachers from ancient times espoused this philosophy,too.
How does it feel when you sit next to a sprawling oak tree? How does it feel when you lie in the hot sand at the beach, listening to the waves splashing on the shore? How does it feel in your kitchen in the morning? How does it feel when you’re with your best friend? Or your spouse?
How does it feel to go into a store filled with beautiful objects, stuffy salesclerks, and signs that scream: DO NOT TOUCH?
Many of us are survivors. We learned the art of leaving our bodies early on, perhaps in our childhood or maybe later, as a way of coping with situations that didn’t feel good and that didn’t feel right to us. We learned to deny how a situation felt– and often how it felt to be with certain people– in order to cope with situations we found ourselves in that we didn’t have the tools or power to escape. We trained ourselves to ignore how things felt because either we told ourselves we had no choice, or we truly didn’t have a say in the matter.
We don’t have to survive anymore. That time is past. Now, it’s time to live.
Come back into your body. Stretch your senses, so that they fill up all of you– your sense of taste, smell, touch, sight, and sound, and your intuitive senses,too. How do you feel emotionally? If you can’t put words to it, just describe it as best as you can. Then go to the next level. Tune into the feelings and moods of the world around you, but not so much that you take these feelings on as yours. Tune in just enough to recognize how the energy of each situation feels to you.
Don’t judge your responses and feelings as either good or bad. And you don’t have to do anything to control how it feels– to you or anyone else. Just allow yourself to experience and recognize how it feels to be you.
Part of speaking the language of letting go means learning to delight and revel in all our senses, including our inner knowing.
Learn to say with trust and confidence, This is how I feel.
God, help me come fully to life.
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Food for Thought
Saying No
There are times when all of us find it difficult to say no. Even though we realize intellectually that we cannot have and do everything, we have trouble saying no to the foods, activities, and people that are not good for us.
Abstaining means saying “No, thank you” when offered something not on our food plan. We may think that we are afraid of hurting someone else’s feelings by our refusal, but usually it is our own compulsive desire that prevents us from giving a firm no. Our sanity and health are more important than pleasing whoever is offering what we should not have.
As we work the program, we become more aware of the people and activities that use up our energies unnecessarily. Avoiding them gives us more time and strength for what means most to us. Learning when and how to say no is a very important part of our recovery. Most often, the person we need to say no to is ourself.
I pray for the strength to say no to what is not good for me.
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A Refuge of Your Own
Creating a Garden Sanctuary by Madisyn Taylor
A personal outdoor sanctuary is an important part of feeling connected to all of life.
Each of us has been blessed with an innate need to celebrate and glorify life. At a most basic level, we honor the forces that came together to bring us into being by caring for our bodies and our souls. To truly rejoice in existence, we must also learn to cultivate loveliness in those special places that replenish the soul. When we create a garden sanctuary, we are reminded that we are a part of both nature's essence and something more. An outdoor retreat is a place we can surround ourselves in nature, beauty, and the life force. It is not difficult to create a sanctuary—we should endeavor, however, to create sanctuaries that speak to us as individuals.
Whether we have a yard, a grassy corner, a patio, or a porch at our disposal, our creative potential is infinite. Any of these spaces can become a magnificent garden. When we feel drawn to specific themes such as Zen, angels, paradise, or the ethereal, we should explore them. Décor and furniture crafted from natural materials like wood and stone blend seamlessly into nature. Yet we can also augment the natural world by filling our garden sanctuaries with statues, bells or gongs, or colorful flags. Running water, like that in a created stream or fountain, helps energy flow smoothly. If space is a concern, crystals and mirrors can fulfill the same function. Hidden features like concealed swings and reflecting pools veiled in shadow can surprise and delight. As your garden sanctuary evolves, remember to invite the elemental spirits of nature to assist you in your efforts to create a small pocket of harmony, beauty, and peace in your own backyard. If you have not already felt th! eir presence, sit quietly in your garden and reach out to them. You will feel these earthly guides at your side as you continue to develop your sanctuary.
In the refuge of brilliant color, sweet scents, and stillness you create in your garden, the burdens imposed upon you by a sometimes hectic world will melt away. The splendor and tranquility of what you have brought into being will entrance you, allowing you to forget the constraints of time and space. No matter how large or small your garden sanctuary, the time you spend reveling in its pleasures will refresh your spirit and provide you with innumerable opportunities to celebrate life. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day
Fear may have originally brought some of us to The Program. In the beginning, fear alone may help some of us stay away from the first drink, pill, joint or whatever. But a fearful state is hardly conducive to comfort and happiness - not for long. We have to find alternatives to fear to get us through those first empty hours, days or even weeks. For most of us, the answer has been to become active in and around The Program. In no time, we feel that we truly belong; for the first time in a long time, we begin to feel a "part of" rather than "apart from."
Am I willing to take the initiative?
Today I Pray
May God please help me find alternatives to fear - that watchdog of my earliest abstinence. I thank Him for directing me to a place where I can meet others who have experienced the same compulsions and fears. I am grateful for my feeling of belonging.
Today I Will Remember
I am "a part of," not "apart from."
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One Day At A Time
THE BOTTOM
"Those who cannot remember the past
are condemned to repeat it."
George Santayana
Sometimes we have to go to the absolute bottom. If we're extremely lucky, the absolute bottom is where we find our inspiration. Sometimes I think that people who don't hit absolute bottom are missing a valuable experience. Then again, living life on the edge of that precipice is no fun at all. The greatest gift is to be able to step away from the edge and live life without the fear of falling.
If we aren't extremely lucky, what we find at the absolute bottom is a trapdoor that opens to a vast, empty space. The door opens and the empty space gratefully accepts the body and the soul given to it.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will stop living on the edge;
I will stop regretting my past;
I will avoid the trapdoor.
~ Richard H.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks -- drinks which they see others taking with impunity. - Pg. xxix - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Mind is the path. Flesh is the vehicle. We must establish a new mind through the creative power of thought using the 12 steps. We must establish a new body, protecting it from drugs. Only then do we become an aspirant of a whole life.
I ask my Creator to make me WHOLE in body, mind, and spirit.
Letting Go
Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order; it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb myself, I have missed the point of this process. On the other had, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have worked through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be fully healthy and return to life. The part of my healing that is a flowing through the stored pain from the past is a decisive, forward-moving action.
I understand that, as part of my process of healing, my responsibility to let go and move on.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. ...You must do the thing you cannot do.' -Eleanor Roosevelt
I do the thing I cannot do as I overcome F.E.A.R. I Face Everything And Recover.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The program fixes it so we don't have to suffer from insanity anymore. Now we can enjoy it!
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I trust my instincts. Today I trust I will know at the right time the right answer. Today I have the faith to know that God guides me in my choices.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I only need one meeting a week, but I go to seven because I don't know which one I need. - Anon.
bluidkiti
07-01-2015, 09:28 AM
July 2
Daily Reflections
THE HEART OF TRUE SOBRIETY
We find that no one need have difficulty with the spirituality of the
program. Willingness, honesty and open-mindedness are the essentials
of recovery. But these are indispensable.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 570
Am I honest enough to accept myself as I am and let this be the "me"
that I let others see? Do I have the willingness to go to any length, to
do whatever is necessary to stay sober? Do I have the
open-mindedness to hear what I have to hear, to think what I have to
think, and to feel what I have to feel?
If my answer to these questions is "Yes," I know enough about the
spirituality of the program to stay sober. As I continue to work the
Twelve Steps, I move on to the heart of true sobriety: serenity with
myself, with others, and with God as I understand Him.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In the association with members of the A.A. group to which we belong,
we have the advantage of sincere friendship and understanding of the
other members who, through social and personal contact, take us away
from our old haunts and environments and help to remove in large
measure the occasions of alcoholic suggestion. We find in this
association a sympathy and a willingness on the part of most members
to do everything in their power to help us. Do I appreciate the
wonderful fellowship of A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
"Except ye become as little children, ye cannot enter the kingdom of
heaven." In this saying it is urged that all who seek heaven on earth or
in the hereafter' should become like little children. In seeking things
of the spirit and in our faith, we should try to become childlike. Even
as we grow older, the years of seeking can give us the attitude of the
trusting child. Not only for its simple trust should we have the childlike
spirit, but also for its joy in life, its ready laughter, its lack of criticism,
and its desire to share. In Charles Dickens's story, A Christmas Carol,
even old Scrooge changed when he got the child-spirit.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may become like a child in faith and hope. I pray that I
may, like a child, be friendly and trusting.
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As Bill Sees It
A Viewer-with-Alarm, p. 183
"I went through several fruitless years in a state called 'viewing with alarm for the good
of the movement.' I thought it was up to me to be always 'correcting conditions.' Seldom
had anybody been able to tell me what I ought to do, and nobody had ever succeeded in
effectively telling me what I must do. I had to learn the hard way out of my own
experience.
"When setting out to 'check' others, I found myself often motivated by fear of what they
were doing, self-righteousness, and even downright intolerance. Consequently, I seldom
succeeded in correcting anything. I just raised barriers of resentment that cut off any
suggestion, example, understanding, or love."
<< << << >> >> >>
"A.A.'s often say, 'Our leaders do not drive by mandate; they lead by example.' If we
would favorably affect others, we ourselves need to practice what we preach--and forget
the 'preaching,' too. The quiet good example speaks for itself."
1. Letter, 1945
2. Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
Sincerity at the Beginning
Self-Honesty
We were told at our first AA meeting that half-measures will avail us nothing. What's needed is a sincere desire to stop drinking and seek and way of life.
As we continue in the program, we learn that sincerity is an ingredient for success in everything we do. Quite often, we may find that we're failing in something simply because our heart isn't really in it.
We can't force ourselves into a sincere posture. Instead, the answer is to know ourselves well enough to know just how we feel about everything we do.
We'll learn to be careful about attempting to do something when our heart is not really in it. We may be doing something we dislike merely for the recognition and money it gives us. For real sincerity, we need more than that, and the truths of the program will help us find it.
I'll be conscious today of the sincerity I have about the things I am attempting to do. There may be some things I need to abandon or at least change.
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Keep It Simple
I never think of the future. It comes soon enough. --- Albert Einstein
None of us know anything for sure about the future. We don't know if we'll be sober tomorrow.
But we can be sure of this moment. We get sober by moments. Our sober moments then stretch into hours, day, and years
Our program tell us to live in the present moment. This is because we can control this moment
We can't control the past or the future. We need to have a sense of control in our life. In our illness, we were out of control. This was because we wouldn't live from moment to moment.
Each moment is filled with as much life as we can handle. Each moment is filled with enough to keep us alive, interested, and growing.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me find You in each moment.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll stop and focus on the present moment. I will work to see how much control I can have if I stay with the moment at hand.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Humor is such a strong weapon, such a strong answer. Women have to make jokes about themselves, laugh about themselves, because they have nothing to lose. --Agnes Varda
Laughter can cure a physical condition; it can and will positively affect an emotional illness as well. Laughter ushers in a new perspective which gives vent to a changed attitude. And our attitude toward any situation, any individual, is all-powerful.
A negative, critical attitude toward our financial situation, toward our disease, toward our boss, or spouse, or children, determines how we feel moment by moment. In like manner, when we raise our sights, look at the world with lightness in our hearts, expecting to enjoy the day, the people, the activity, we'll succeed.
Finding humor in a situation, any situation prevents us from succumbing to feelings of powerlessness. Feeling powerless, behaving as victims, came easily for many of us before we chose this program and the Twelve Steps to live by. Choosing a humorous response, opting to laugh at our situation, at any point in time, keeps our personal power where it belongs--with ourselves.
My emotional health depends on my active involvement in deciding who I am, right now. Deciding to chuckle rather than snarl will give me an unexpected emotional boost.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
Much has already been said about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge and power. If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action.
p. 85
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Housewife Who Drank At Home
She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.
I went to my doctor again. He knew what I was doing, how I was trying. I said, "I can't find any middle road in life. I can't find it. It's either all work, or drink." He said, "Why don't you try Alcoholics Anonymous?" I was willing to try anything. I was licked. For the second time, I was licked. The first time was when I knew I couldn't live without alcohol. But this second time, I found I couldn't live normally without it, and I was licked worse than ever.
p. 299
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and fairly obvious. Using his best judgment of what has been right and what has been wrong, he might make a rough survey of his conduct with respect to his primary instincts for sex, security, and society. Looking back over his life, he can readily get under way by consideration of questions such as these:
When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Did I spoil my marriage and injure my children? Did I jeopardize my standing in the community? Just how did I react to these situations at the time? Did I burn with a guilt that nothing could extinguish? Or did I insist that I was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself? How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on other people? If there was rejection or coldness at home, did I use this as a reason for promiscuity?
pp. 50-51
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"In forgiving ourselves, we make the journey from guilt for what we
have done (or not done) to celebration of what we have become."
--Joan Borysenko
Pitying yourself will get you nowhere. Things aren't always going to
go the way you want them to, but still you must set the rules regarding
how you respond to them.
There is incredible beauty, in the gentle and quiet spirit, precious in
God's direction.
--SweetyZee
"He who cannot rest, cannot work; He who cannot let go, cannot hold
on; He who cannot find footing, cannot go forward."
--Harry Emerson Fosdick
"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far
more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting
moment."
--Benjamin Franklin
If there is anything we wish to change in the child, we should first
examine it and see whether it is not something that could be better
changed in ourselves.
--Carl Jung
Voices we prefer to ignore may speak words we need to hear.
--Don Deal
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
BEAUTY
"Beauty is not caused. It is."
--Emily Dickinson
So many people think that beauty is what you do to yourself; what you
wear, makeup, clothes, hairstyles or expensive jewelry. Again it is so
easy to get caught up in "things". Reality is not about what we wear
but who we are.
The beauty that God has created comes from within. The twinkle in
the eyes that says "hello". The hug that says "I love you". The gentle
embrace and smile that says "I forgive you". The tear that cries "I
understand".
When God said to the world, "It is good", Beauty was born. Drugs and
crazy relationships only get in the way of us being what we were
intended to be: beautiful for God.
Today I seek to put God's beauty in my actions, words and attitudes.
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"Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the
Lord."
Psalm 31:24
For the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from
being snared.
Proverbs 3:26
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Daily Inspiration
Avoid the tendency to presuppose that things will turn out for the worse. Lord, help me keep an open mind so that I am able to see other solutions to my situations and then give me the determination to make a difference when I can.
We take for granted so much of what God has planned for us. Lord, may I have sufficient preparation to meet the challenges of today and rejoice in the person that I am.
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NA Just For Today
Comparing
"Our personal stories may vary in individual pattern, but in the end we all have the same thing in common." Basic Text, p.84
We addicts are a varied bunch, coming from different backgrounds,
having used different drugs, and recalling different experiences. Our
differences don't disappear in recovery; for some, those differences
become even more pronounced. Freedom from active addiction gives us the
freedom to be ourselves, as we truly are. The fact that we are all
recovering doesn't mean that we all necessarily have the same needs or
goals. Each of us has our own lessons to learn in recovery.
With so many differences from one addict to the next, how do we help
one another in recovery and how do we use each other's experience? We
come together to share our lives in light of the principles of
recovery. Though our lives are different, the spiritual principles we
apply are the same. It is by the light of these principles, shining
through our differences, that we illuminate one another's way on our
individual paths.
We all have two things in common: addiction and recovery. When we
listen carefully, we hear others tell of suffering from the same
disease we have suffered from, regardless of their specific
backgrounds. When we open our ears, we hear other addicts talk of
applying spiritual principles that promise hope to us as well,
regardless of our personal goals.
Just for today: I have my own path to follow, yet I'm grateful for the
fellowship of others who've suffered from addiction and who are
learning to apply the principles of recovery, just like me.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Now my soul hath elbowroom. --William Shakespeare
If we spend too much time together we are bound to grow weary of one another. This would happen regardless of who the other person was. In a family, we need some time apart to pursue other interests and friendships. We may be able to meet many needs for each other, but there will be some we cannot meet. If we press too hard upon one another we will cramp our life together.
Our needs for space aren't just physical. Freedom to think and feel what seems appropriate for us, to be alone if we want, is a large part of our lives together. Only with this kind of freedom is love possible. Love requires freedom. We need to value each other, and at the same time realize that no one person or family can fill us with all life has to offer.
What are my own freedoms at home?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Fair play is primarily not blaming others for anything that is wrong with us. --Eric Hoffer
As adults, we accept responsibility for our feelings and our circumstances. We haven't chosen our own troubles, but we have the job of dealing with them. If a man falls and breaks a leg, he might say to someone, "It's your fault, and I'll make you pay for this!" But that won't fix his leg. The healing still has to come from within.
Our impulse to blame others is an attempt to escape our responsibilities. We become overcritical. We want someone else to take the rap for our pain and our misdeeds, but this only delays our wholeness as men. There is no point in blaming ourselves either. When we first confront our discomfort directly and accept responsibility for dealing with it, we feel an inner urge to escape again. If we stay with the discomfort a while, a new stage begins - the healing and acceptance stage. A feeling of wholeness comes, a feeling of being a real person, of having reached our full size.
May I not indulge in blame today - toward myself or anyone else. Instead, may I be a strong, responsible man.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Humor is such a strong weapon, such a strong answer. Women have to make jokes about themselves, laugh about themselves, because they have nothing to lose. --Agnes Varda
Laughter can cure a physical condition; it can and will positively affect an emotional illness as well. Laughter ushers in a new perspective which gives vent to a changed attitude. And our attitude toward any situation, any individual, is all-powerful.
A negative, critical attitude toward our financial situation, toward our disease, toward our boss, or spouse, or children, determines how we feel moment by moment. In like manner, when we raise our sights, look at the world with lightness in our hearts, expecting to enjoy the day, the people, the activity, we'll succeed.
Finding humor in a situation, any situation prevents us from succumbing to feelings of powerlessness. Feeling powerless, behaving as victims, came easily for many of us before we chose this program and the Twelve Steps to live by. Choosing a humorous response, opting to laugh at our situation, at any point in time, keeps our personal power where it belongs--with ourselves.
My emotional health depends on my active involvement in deciding who I am, right now. Deciding to chuckle rather than snarl will give me an unexpected emotional boost.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Who Knows Best?
Others do not know what's best for us.
We do not know what's best for others.
It is our job to determine what's best for ourselves.
"I know what you need." . . . "I know what you should do." . . . "Now listen, this is what I think you should be working on right now."
These are audacious statements, beliefs that take us away from how we operate on a spiritual plane of life. Each of us is given the ability to be able to discern and detect our own path, on a daily basis. This is not always easy. We may have to struggle to reach that quiet, still place.
Giving advice, making decisions for others, mapping out their strategy, is not our job. Nor is it their job to direct us. Even if we have a clean contract with someone to help us - such as in a sponsorship relationship - we cannot trust that others always know what is best for us. We are responsible for listening to the information that comes to us. We are responsible for asking for guidance and direction., But it is our responsibility to sift and sort through information, and then listen to ourselves about what is best for us. Nobody can know that but ourselves.
A great gift we can give to others is to be able to trust in them - that they have their own source of guidance and wisdom, that they have the ability to discern what is best for them and the right to find that path by making mistakes and learning.
To trust ourselves to be able to discover - through that same imperfect process of struggle, trial, and error - is a great gift we can give ourselves.
Today, I will remember that we are each given the gift of being able to discover what is best for ourselves. God, help me trust that gift.
I am accepting myself just as I am, imperfections and all. I am not striving to be perfect today. I only want to grow, to change, to become more and more open and let God and love be in charge of my life." --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
What Would Make You Happy?
Why don’t you make yourself happy? Did someone tell you you couldn’t be happy, couldn’t let life help you out? It doesn’t matter who told you you couldn’t have what you wanted. What matters is if you’re still telling yourself that now.
Yes, there are many situations in life in which we need to go without, do what needs to be done, get the job done. There are times when a particular purpose is served by depriving ourselves. But there are also situations– many more than we think– in which we can have what we want. There are moments when what we want matters.
Look into your heart. Ask yourself what you want. What would feel good? What would bring joy? Is anything to be gained by depriving yourself a while longer? Get creative. Look around. What are some ways you could give yourself what you want? What could you do to create your life more to your liking?
Giving yourself what you want isn’t selfish. It teaches others they can have more of what they want from life,too.
Use your imagination. Set yourself free. Let yourself see the pictures and feel the emotions of what would make you happy. Then take a moment, pause, and smile. You’re beginning to get a glimpse of all you can have from God.
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More Language Of Letting Go
It’s good for your heart
“I know I’ve got some emotions up, just brewing right beneath the surface,” Jake said one day. “I’m edgy, irritable, and definitely not centered. But I don’t want to look. I don’t want to go into the emotions. I don’t like feelings. Whenever I give into them. I end up feeling like a piece of cooked spagetti– for days.”
Emotions can take a lot out of us. Feeling them, whether it’s anger, fear, or sadness, can leave us exhausted and drained.
Not feeling our emotions, however, can keep us edgy, irritable, and off-balance. Not feeling our feelings for an extended time can drive us to acting out, whether that means overeating, obsessing, staying in bed and hiding from the world, or staring at the television every night until we pass out.
Be gentle with yourself. Don’t force it. But don’t run away from your feelings, either. You might feel like cooked spagetti for a while, but what’s really softening up is your heart.
God, help me face and feel any feelings.
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Offerings of the Day
Finding Gifts in All by Madisyn Taylor
Before bed each night, take the time to review your day and review the gifts you received.
When we have good days, we often find ourselves going over the details later, enjoying them a second and third time as we feel the joy of our good fortune. When we have bad days, we may find ourselves poring over the details of our misfortunes. However, we can reframe those bad days by making it a daily practice to spend some time before going to bed each night to review the gifts we received that day. Regardless of our evaluation of the day—good, bad, mediocre—we can call forth the many blessings that were present. This practice transforms our consciousness as it reveals the fullness at the heart of our lives.
Some days it’s easy to recount the gifts we’ve received; on other days, we have to look harder for the offerings of the day, but once we do, we will find there are always quite a few. We can keep it simple and be grateful for the fact that we have a roof over our head, nature, food, and our health. Once we have fully experienced these gifts, we can move outward to the gifts that may require a little more thought such as the gifts of forgiveness, tolerance and acceptance that we may have learned that day. We can also always be grateful for the people in our lives who support us, no matter how bad our day may have been.
Just reviewing the many positive offerings in our lives provides a context for our difficulties that puts them in proper perspective, but we can also make an effort to see the gifts even in adverse circumstances. This can be challenging and may require some practice before it feels authentic, but we have all had the experience of a disappointment or loss leading to a surprising gain. Just remembering this and trusting the give and take of life can help us to remember that sometimes the best gifts of all are the ones we don’t recognize right away. In addition, the lessons we learn in the face of adversity are offerings in their own right, allowing us to count patience, wisdom, and fortitude alongside the other gifts of the day. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
During our days of active addiction, many of us displayed almost dazzlingly fertile powers of imagination. In no time at all, we could dream up more reasons — or, rather excuses — for pursuing our addictions than most people use for all other purposes in their entire lives. When we first come to The Program, our once-imaginative minds seem to become lethargic and even numb. “Now what do I do?” many of us wonder. Gradually, however, the lethargy disappears. We begin learning to live and become turned on to life in ways that we never dreamed possible. Am I finding that I can now enjoy activities that I wouldn’t even consider in the old days?
Today I Pray
May God give me a new surge of energy directed toward “turning on to life” rather than making excuses for not handling my responsibilities. May He allow my out-of-order imagination to be restored — not to the buzzing over activity of my compulsive days, but to a healthy openness to life’s boundless possibilities.
Today I Will Remember
Turn on to life.
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One More Day
If I’d known I was going to live so long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
– Leon Eldred
We had few concerns when we were young other than eating, sleeping, and playing with friends. As we grew into young adulthood, we worked hard and played hard, often ignoring any signals our bodies gave us. We expected to be stiff after exercise, for example, and accepted it as part of our lifestyle.
By the time our chronic medical conditions became evident, our health habits were fairly well-established. We certainly can’t undo the early care — or neglect — of our bodies. But we can learn new habits that will serve us well all the days of our lives.
Ultimately, my physical and emotional health depends upon my willingness to take care of myself.
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You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Spiritual Strength
What we compulsive overeaters need in order to control our disease is spiritual strength. If we are strong spiritually, we will not turn to food to fill our inner emptiness. We overate because we were spiritually impoverished, and overeating further depleted our spirits.
Paradoxically, we are strongest spiritually when we are most aware of our weakness. In order for our Higher Power to take over, we must recognize and admit our powerlessness. Spiritual strength comes to those who have the necessary humility to receive it.
We do not acquire this strength overnight. The more time we spend each day in communion with God, the stronger we become. Cultivating the awareness of His presence as we go about our activities enables us to rely more and more on His strength and less and less on our own.
Strengthen us with spiritual food so that we do not need to overeat.
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One Day At A Time
COMMITMENT
"One small step for a man ~
One giant leap for mankind."
Neil Armstrong
When I came into program, I was very overwhelmed by the idea of commitment. The thought of committing to a food plan or exercise regime was more than I could comprehend; in fact, I would feel panic rising in me at the thought of it. I would have dreams of being a mouse caught in a corner with nowhere to run. I would throw in the proverbial monkey wrench after a short time, and soon be on my own turf ... the desperation and depression which were my "old friends" would reappear, and I would be back into my "safe" and always-waiting disease.
This recovery program taught me "one day at a time;" it taught me to put one foot in front of the other; that for one day I could do what I couldn't do, or even fathom doing, for a lifetime. This is how I found abstinence. Breaking up my days, weeks, months and years into 24-hour periods allows me to live in the now, and not feel swallowed up in thinking that I have to do this for the rest of my life.
One Day at a Time . . .
The steps may seem small, it may even look as though I'm not moving at all, but with God's help I make giant leaps toward wellness and peace of mind.
~ Shana
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I was not too well at the time, and was plagued by waves of self-pity and resentment. This sometimes nearly drove me back to drink, but I soon found that when all other measures failed, work with another alcoholic would save the day. Many times I have gone to my old hospital in despair. On talking to a man there, I would be amazingly lifted up and set on my feet. It is a design for living that works in rough going. - Pg. 15 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Although we don't know it, there is a cloud over our brains in the first days. It takes just about 30 days for this drug cloud to lift from our thinking. Any time now, this cloud will leave and our vision will become clearer than it has been in years.
May my eyes clear, my mind clear, my desires clear as I begin my clean and sober days.
Reinvestment
I have been through a journey of forgiveness. I've faced my anger and hurt and brought order and clarity to my inner world. I've accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things that I could. Because I've shown the courage to face my inner demons and look them in the eye, I feel stronger and more competent. Forgiveness of my self and others has offered me a way out of pain and confusion, and now I find I have a renewed interest in life. I see things differently. I feel liberated from something that was tying up me energy. And I recognize and accept my own humanity, and the humanity of others. I am ready and willing to reinvest in the ideal of love. I want to find worthy projects and passions, and put my energy toward them. I have something to give to the world and the world has something to give to me. I am right where I am supposed to be and I've met the challenges of my life. I am ready to live.
I invest my energy with care and gusto.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Don't let the therapeutically 'correct' way to run a group hijack your meeting. Leaders are reluctant to cut a newcomer off for fear of shaming their inner child, rejecting them, or appearing to be mean. We are not therapy and we can't share with them if they can't listen.
I do not let the newcomer's inner child run our meetings. This is not play therapy.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
God does not want me to do extraordinary things; He wants me to do ordinary things extraordinarily well.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am accepting myself just as I am, imperfections and all. I am not striving to be perfect today. I only want to grow, to change, to become more and more open and let God and love be in charge of my life.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
You can tell an alcoholic - but you can't tell him much. Anon.
bluidkiti
07-02-2015, 08:40 AM
July 3
Daily Reflections
EXPERIENCE: THE BEST TEACHER
Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious
contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to
be inspired at all times.
ALCOHOLIC ANONYMOUS , p. 87
Some say that experience is the best teacher, but I believe
that experience is the only teacher. I have been able to
learn of God's love for me only by the experience of my
dependence on that love. At first I could not be sure of
His direction in my life, but now I see that if I am to be
bold enough to ask for His guidance, I must act as if He
has provided it. I frequently ask God to help me remember
that He has a path for me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In the beginning of Alcoholics Anonymous there were only two
persons. Now there are many groups and thousands of members.
True, the surface has only been scratched. There are probably
ten million or more persons in America alone who need our
help. More and more people are making a start in A.A. each
day. In the case of individual members, the beginning has
been accomplished when they admit they are powerless and turn
to a Power greater than themselves, admitting that their
lives have become unmanageable. That Higher Power works for
good in all things and helps us to accomplish much in
individual growth and in the growth of A.A. groups. Am I
doing my part in helping A.A. to grow?
Meditation For The Day
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness,
for they shall be filled. Only in the fullness of faith can the
heart-sick and faint and weary be satisfied, healed, and rested.
Think of the wonderful spiritual revelations still to be found
by those who are trying to live the spiritual life. Much of life
is spiritually unexplored country. Only to the consecrated and
loving people who walk with God in spirit can these great
spiritual discoveries be revealed. Keep going forward and keep
growing in righteousness.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not be held back by the material things of the
world. I pray that I may let God lead me forward.
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As Bill Sees It
Meeting Adversity, p. 184
"Our spiritual and emotional growth in A.A. does not depend so deeply upon success as it
does upon our failures and setbacks. If you will bear this in mind, I think that your slip
will have the effect of kicking you upstairs, instead of down.
"We A.A.'s have had no better teacher than Old Man Adversity, except in those cases
where we refuse to let him teach us."
<< << << >> >> >>
"Now and then all of us fall under heavy criticism. When we are angered and hurt, it's
difficult not to retaliate in kind. Yet we can restrain ourselves and then probe ourselves,
asking whether our critics were really right. If so, we can admit our defects to them. This
usually clears the air for mutual understanding.
"Suppose our critics are being unfair. Then we can try calm persuasion. If they continue
to rant, it is still possible for us--in our hearts--to forgive them. Maybe a sense of humor
can be our saving grace--thus we can both forgive and forget."
1. Letter, 1958
2. Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
Battles we've won or lost.
Achievements.
Even the continuous sobriety we're enjoying is no shield from traps we seem to set for ourselves. At times, we can find ourselves in the foolish game of continuing to fight battles we've won or lost.
One losing battle is the attempt to win the approval of someone who has always disliked us. That person may be gone, but we still fight....and lose..... the same battle when we find ourselves in a similar situation.
We also may have won some battles without knowing it. This can happen when we've set our goals unrealistically high. We may be fairly successful in our work, for example, but still feel that we have failed because a high goal we set eluded us. That goal, however, may have been all but impossible to attain, and while we mourn our perceived failure, we ignore the successes we many have achieved in the meantime. Consequently, we should never let any of these battles interfere with our plan for sobriety. We must stay sober at all costs.
This day, I'll not strive to impress people who may always disapprove of me. I will also accept my successes even if they fall short of my highest dreams.
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Keep It Simple
We are only as sick as the secrets we keep.--- Anonymous
It is dangerous for us to keep secrets. Shame builds, and we'll want relief. We may turn to alcohol or other drugs. True relief comes by talking about our secrets, by sharing who we really are with others. Our program helps us live a life based on honesty. Our program helps us battle shame. We don't keep secrets anymore. We start our meetings and share what we tried to keep secret before.
" Hi, my name is____________, and I'm am alcoholic." " Hi my name is_____________, and I'm a drug addict." We keep telling our secret, and the shame gets less and less.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I pray to live an honest life.
Action for the Day: I'll list any secrets I've been keeping. I'll talk with my sponsor about them.
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Each Day a New Beginning
No one can build (her) security upon the nobleness of another person. --Willa Cather
Where do we look for our security? Do we look to our husbands or our lovers? Do we look to a parent or our children? Perhaps we seek our security in our jobs. But none of these avenues brings lasting contentment, as we've each probably discovered, just as pills, alcohol, or maybe food failed to give us lasting security.
Security of the spirit is with us from our birth. It's just that we haven't tapped into the source. Perhaps we don't even know the source, but it's been with us always, awaiting our realization of it.
No step do we ever take alone. Each breath we take is in partnership with the eternal source of strength and security within us. We have the choice to accept this partnership any time. And this guarantee of security in all things at all times is the gift of freedom.
Our desire for security is God-given. The security we desire is also given by God to us. We are secure today and every day.
Each step I take is in concert with my higher power. I need experience nothing alone. I can breathe in and tap the plentiful source of strength awaiting me, now.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
Step Eleven suggests prayer and meditation. We shouldn’t be shy on this matter of prayer. Better men than we are using it constantly. It works, if we have the proper attitude and work at it. It would be easy to be vague about this matter. Yet, we believe we can make some definite and valuable suggestions.
pp. 85-86
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Housewife Who Drank At Home
She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.
The fellowship I found in A.A. enabled me to face my problem honestly and squarely. I couldn't do it among my relatives; I couldn't do it among my friends. No one likes to admit that they're a drunk, that they can't control this thing. But when we come into A.A., we can face our problem honestly and openly. I went to closed meetings and open meetings. And I took everything A.A. had to give me. Easy does it, first things first, one day at a time. It was at that point that I reached surrender. I heard one very ill woman say that she didn't believe in the surrender part of the A.A. program. My heavens! Surrender to me has meant the ability to run my home, to face my responsibilities as they should be faced to take life as it comes to me day by day and work my problems out. That's what surrender has meant to me. I surrendered once to the bottle, and I couldn't do these things. Since I gave my will over to A.A., whatever A.A., has wanted of me I've tried to do to the best of my ability. When I'm asked to go out on a call, I go. I'm not going; A.A. is leading me there. A.A. gives us alcoholics direction into a way of life without the need for alcohol. That life for me is lived one day at a time, letting the problems of the future rest with the future. When the time comes to solve them, God will give me strength for that day.
p. 300
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Also of importance for most alcoholics are the questions they must ask about their behavior respecting financial and emotional security. In these areas fear, greed, possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst. Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill me with conflict? Did I try to cover up those feelings of inadequacy by bluffing, cheating, lying, or evading responsibility? Or by griping that others failed to recognize my truly exceptional abilities? Did I overvalue myself and play the big shot? Did I have such unprincipled ambition that I double-crossed and undercut my associates? Was I extravagant? Did I recklessly borrow money, caring little whether it was repaid or not? Was I a pinch penny, refusing to support my family properly? Did I cut corners financially? What about the "quick money" deals, the stock market, and the races?
p. 51
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Deep within us is a place where we have found God and God has found
us. Once in a great while, we come to this place within us and we
realize it is the goal of our seeking. It feels like home. We may not be
consciously aware of our seeking. We may be living our lives day by
day. The wonder is that while this searching goes on within us, there is
also the One who seeks us out, calling to us, desiring that we find the
home within. It is God who takes the initiative of seeking and places
the desire in our hearts to be found.
--Unknown
The world needs all of our power and love and energy, and each of us
has something to give. The trick is to find it and use it, to find it and
give it away so there will always be more. We can be lights for each
other, and through each other's illumination we will see the way. Each
of us is a seed, a silent promise, and it is always spring.
--Merle Shain
A true winner is one who congratulates the one receiving recognition
in heart felt words.
--unknown
Forgiveness is only one step in the healing process, but a very
important one to learn.
--unknown
Burdening yourself with trivial things only affects one person - YOU.
--unknown
There is no investment you'll ever make which will pay you so well as
the effort to scatter sunshine and good cheer wherever you are.
--unknown
We see God through eyes of faith.
--SweetyZee
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CHOICES
"Destiny is not a matter of
chance, it is a matter of choice;
it is not a thing to be achieved."
--William Jennings Bryan
It is so important for us to see that we create our destiny. We create
our futures in the choices we initiate today. During my addiction I was
like a ship without a sail. I drifted through life and was tossed in a
thousand directions. Today I am able to point myself in the direction I
want to go.
I do not believe that this attitude takes anything away from the power
of God because He gave me freedom in the first place! He created me
to be free and to have the gift of decision-making. He is not a dictator
God, and I am not a puppet on a string. He loves me enough to allow
me to learn from my mistakes and take personal pride in my
achievements. Addiction made me powerless. Sobriety puts me in
touch with my God-given power.
I am forever grateful and thankful for my involvement in my own life.
I pray today that I might live responsibly a day at a time.
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"Jesus said to him, If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me."
Matthew 19:21
"We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of
childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves,
who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait
eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in
this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who
hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet
have, we wait for it patiently."
Romans 8:22-25
"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full
armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's
schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against
the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark
world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."
Ephesians 6:10-12
"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like
a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm
in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the
world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings."
I Peter 5:8-9
"You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because
the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world."
I John 4:4
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Daily Inspiration
Stay close to God because He is the solution to all problems. Lord, I will live in Your presence, protected by You and Your peace will be mine.
Our lives should be productive and useful and we should always make a difference because we are alive. Lord, You have brought me to this new day. Work with me so that I will have a successful day with many accomplishments whether they are great or small.
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NA Just For Today
Quiet Time
"Many of us have found that setting aside quiet time for ourselves is helpful in making conscious contact with our Higher Power."
Basic Text, p.92
Most of us pay lip-service to the value of conscious contact with a Higher Power. Yet how many of us consistently take time to improve that conscious contact? If we've not already established a regular regimen of prayer and meditation, today is the day to start one.
A "quiet time" need not be long. Many of us find that twenty to thirty minutes is enough time to quiet ourselves, focus our attention with a spiritual reading, share our thoughts and concerns in prayer, and take a few moments to listen for an answer in meditation. Our "quiet time" need not be lengthy to be effective, provided it is consistent. Twenty minutes taken once a month to pray will probably do little but frustrate us with the poor quality of our conscious contact. Twenty minutes taken regularly each day, however, renews and reinforces an already lively contact with our Higher Power.
In the hustle and bustle of the recovering addict's day, many of us end up going from morning to night without taking time out to improve our conscious contact with the God we've come to understand. However, if we set aside a particular time of the day, every day, as "quiet time," we can be sure that our conscious contact will improve.
Just for today: I will set aside a few moments, once I finish reading today's entry, to pray and meditate. This will be the beginning of a new pattern for my recovery.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
You are here for a purpose. There is not a duplicate of you in the whole wide world; there never has been, there never will be. You were brought here now to fill a certain need. Take time to think that over. --Lou Austin
No other person is exactly like you or me. No one can do exactly what we can, or touch another person in exactly the way we can. Out of all the people who could have been created, we were chosen to be a part of this time and place.
We are needed to fulfill a plan, in our families as well as in our relationships. Knowing we have unique abilities, we will spend less time feeling jealous of what others can do.
Through our dreams and yearnings, God shows us who we can be. It is up to us to have the courage to follow that dream with action.
What unique gift can I offer the world today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Vitality shows not only in the ability to persist but also in the ability to start over. --F. Scott Fitzgerald
Sitting in a stalled car on the railroad tracks with a train approaching, one needs to let go and start over. A man who persists in that situation will die. Many situations require fierce persistence, but in others we need to start over. Early in recovery, most of us haven't had a good way of knowing the difference. Perhaps with every challenge we tried harder and held on tighter. Our codependent relationships and our addictions had been our escapes.
Often we long for some clear directions from God to tell us, "Now is the time to let go," or "Now is the time to persist." That is not how we hear from our Higher Power. We can practice being less automatic in rising to every challenge. We can learn to see the wisdom and vitality in starting over. Certainly our recovery is a good example. Gradually we develop our contact with our Higher Power to help discern the difference. As we do, we develop more options for leading healthier lives.
Today, I will not automatically persist with a challenge. I will notice when I have an opportunity to let go.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
No one can build (her) security upon the nobleness of another person. --Willa Cather
Where do we look for our security? Do we look to our husbands or our lovers? Do we look to a parent or our children? Perhaps we seek our security in our jobs. But none of these avenues brings lasting contentment, as we've each probably discovered, just as pills, alcohol, or maybe food failed to give us lasting security.
Security of the spirit is with us from our birth. It's just that we haven't tapped into the source. Perhaps we don't even know the source, but it's been with us always, awaiting our realization of it.
No step do we ever take alone. Each breath we take is in partnership with the eternal source of strength and security within us. We have the choice to accept this partnership any time. And this guarantee of security in all things at all times is the gift of freedom.
Our desire for security is God-given. The security we desire is also given by God to us. We are secure today and every day.
Each step I take is in concert with my higher power. I need experience nothing alone. I can breathe in and tap the plentiful source of strength awaiting me, now.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Directness
So much of our communication can reflect our need to control. We say what we think others want to hear. We try to keep others from getting angry, feeling afraid, going away, or disliking us. But our need to control traps us into feeling like victims and martyrs.
Freedom is just a few words away. Those words are our truths. We can say what we need to say. We can gently, but assertively, speak our mind.
Let go of your need to control. We do not need to be judgmental, tactless, blaming, or cruel when we speak our truths. Neither do we need to hide our light. Let go, and freely be who you are.
Today, I will be honest with others, and myself knowing that if I don't, my truth will come out some other way.
It is exciting to know that the more I listen to the chattering that goes on in my mind, the quicker I can identify the blocks to my positive and creative energy. Today I release all negativity so that I can be fully alive in the moment. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Cherish Your Heart
A woman I met in Washington gave me a gift. It was a beautiful heart, sculpted by her son, an artist. It was a mosaic of broken pieces, a heart covered with break lines that had healed over and mended together.
“My son made this,” she said. “I want you to have it.” I thanked her for the gift. Now I keep it close. It’s a reminder to keep my heart open.
Keep your heart open. Take care lest life’s problems shut you down. When you close down, your passion, enthusiasm, faith, and zest will disappear.
Open your heart to all you meet. If it’s not safe, you’ll know. But don’t close your heart. Just move in another direction. Don’t worry about getting your heart broken. Sometimes that happens. Sometimes it’s the price you pay for opening your heart, for taking the risk. But if it does happen, you can allow your heart to heal, then open it once again.
Remember the sculpture. Let it remind you that, once healed, a broken heart is a beautiful work of art.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say what’s up today
What’s up?
I don’t mean the events. You most likely are extremely aware fo the events taking place– or not occurring– in your life. What’s up emotionally?
Do you feel anxious, scared, ambivalent, wishy-washy, or fiercely determined? Do you feel clever, powerful, blissful, curious, or relieved?
There are many shades and colors, nuances of emotions. Some emotions get our attention quickly. They clearly present themselves and we immediately name them and claim them as ours. Sometimes the feelings are not that easy to identify. Those are usually the ones we need to pay the most attention to; those are often the ones that can be controlling our lives.
An important idea to remember about feelings is that they are just emotional energy and we’re allowed to feel however we feel. There’s no right and wrong about emotions; the names are just words we use to identify that particular emotional energy burst.
There’s another way we can feel, another space we’re each entitled to. That space is called “centered,balanced, and clear.” When we identify, feel, and release whatever feeling is up each day, we’ll easily and naturally return to that quiet, peaceful, centered place.
Sometimes, if the emotional burst is big– of the volcanic size– it might take a few days or a week to return to that clear, centered place. Other times, just an acknowledging nod in the direction of the emotion that’s up is all we need to do.
Don’t resist. Give in. Give in all the way to what and how you feel. Then just let that feeling float away. The more you give in to whatever you’re feeling, the less it will hurt and the more quickly it’ll disappear. The more specific you can be about the event or person that’s triggering the emotion, the more you’ll help yourself slide gracefully through the emotional burst.
Mastering your emotions means taking responsibility for how you feel. Feelings are important, but remember, they’re just feelings,too. Don’t let them define reality, control your life, or color your world. Mastering your emotions means clearing out your emotions so you can live, move, love, work, and play from that peaceful, centered place.
Take a moment today and each day of your life.
As yourself, “What’s up?”
God, help me become fluent with my emotions. Help me learn to feel whatever I feel, then regularly restore myself to that centered, balanced, place.
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Food for Thought
Rest in God
Fatigue is one of our worst enemies. Sometimes it is our own unnecessary busyness and over-ambition which wears us out, and sometimes the cause of our fatigue seems unavoidable. Depression and weariness go hand in hand.
It was our habit to reach for something to eat when we were tired. We may still crave refined sugar and carbohydrates as a quick boost when our energy lags. Instead of these substances, which we know will let us down, we need to turn to our Higher Power for rest and refreshment.
Even better than waiting until we are fatigued to ask for help is the habit of resting continuously in God. We may then carry on our activities knowing that we are upheld by His power, and we will avoid the exhaustion of trying to accomplish everything by our own efforts.
May I remember to rest in You.
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The Greater Cause
Some Good Reasons for Doing Good by Madisyn Taylor
Imagine what a different world we would live in if we all worked toward the greater good.
With all that takes place in our lives, it can sometimes be easy to overlook the fact that we’re part of something greater than ourselves—a collective consciousness, the Universe, a greater cause. Because of our tendency to forget this, we might make decisions in our lives that don’t reflect that responsibility that comes with this belonging. All too often, we focus just on the short-term, tangible gain to ourselves without worrying about its consequences. Other times, we may discard the greater cause because it seems like “hard work.” The challenge is to expand our minds so that we transcend the distinction between self and others, so we are aware of how our choices and actions can impact a greater cause.
Contributing to the greater cause doesn’t have to be all about self-sacrifice. For example, if you plant a tree in a community space, its shelter will cool and protect you as well as your neighbors. Or, your reward might be in the form of the beauty that you now see in that space or the sincere smiles of appreciation from neighbors. When you serve the greater cause you also serve your greater good. There is nothing that you cannot do for your highest good that will not benefit the good of all. For example, saying no to a relationship that isn’t right for you not only benefits you but serves the greater good of the other person that you are honoring with your honesty. Saying yes to your dream job not only fulfills you but also serves the people that will benefit from your enthusiasm and productivity.
When you know you are serving a greater cause, there is little room for fear and doubt. You know that what you do will benefit others, so there is no way the universe is not going to support your efforts - even if sometimes it may not look that way. Serving the greater cause allows you to live from the space of your greatness. When you know that what you do can serve a greater cause, you are aware of your power and ability to influence and create change in this world. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Chance is a part of the flow of life. Sometimes we’re frustrated because change seems slow in coming. Sometimes, too, we’re resistant to a change that seems to have been thrust upon us. We must remember that change, in and of itself, neither blinds us not frees us. Only our attitude toward change blinds or frees. As we learn to flow with the stream of life, praying for guidance as to any change that presents itself — praying, also, for guidance if we want to make a change and none seems in view — we become willing. Am I willing to let God take charge, directing me in changes I should make and the actions I should take?
Today I Pray
When change comes too fast — or not fast enough — for me, I pray I can adjust accordingly to make use of the freedom The Program offers to me. I pray for the guidance of my Higher Power when change presents itself — or when it doesn’t and I wish it would. May I listen for direction from that Power.
Today I Will Remember
God is in charge.
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One More Day
A chronic illness is a constant and sometimes overwhelming companion … only the power of a warm heart can alleviate the deep chill.
– Robert K. Massie
When our lifestyles change and an illness pervades our lives, we often feel lonely. It’s not like a bad mood we can just shake off.
We need our friends and family around us, but it’s up to us to give them the cue. People may stay at arm’s length until we all — even encourage — them to come closer. We need the support they can give us, and they need the satisfaction of contributing to our lives no matter how we’ve changed in our illness. We comfort and encourage each other, and we all feel blessed.
My illness has not changed the basic person I am. I needed the love and support of others before. I still do.
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One Day At A Time
HOPE
“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.”
Emily Dickinson
I wanted desperately to lose weight, be happy, be spiritually and emotionally fulfilled, and feel serenity in my soul. How long must one wait in a single lifetime to achieve these things? How long must one function day-to-day at a fairly high level, only to close the door at night to a world of emptiness? How long must one go without hope?
My compulsion for food had come close to destroying my life. I was in a constant state of denial that the simple act of eating food could account for a life run amok and totally unmanageable. But the truth of the matter is that it could ... and it did.
I found Twelve Steps that empowered me to do things I'd never dreamed of doing. These Twelve Steps enabled me to see the simple reality that compulsive eating could destroy my life. They showed me that life was beautiful and that my disease could turn out to be my greatest blessing. The Twelve Steps gave me something so precious that I am in awe of their power .... something so empowering that I had to admit powerlessness in order to become powerful. The Twelve Steps gave me the most beautiful gift I have ever received ... a gift that no one can ever take away from me ... a gift that I treasure above all gifts: hope. They gave me the gift of hope.
One day at a time...
I will hold onto my hope.
One day at a time ... I will treasure my hope.
One day at a time ... hope perches in my soul.
One day at a time ... hope sings its song.
~ Mari
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
An alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature. Our struggles with them are variously strenuous, comic, and tragic. - Pg. 16 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Another part of learning good hourly habits is to take time for physical exercise. This is part of the balance of our new lives. We need activity for the well-being of the body and for self-discipline. We can walk, swim, jog, take up sports, aerobics, dance, or even yoga--just as long as we are consistent and somehow active.
Give me the self-discipline to maintain some type of physical activity in my clean and sober life-style.
The Creative Power of My Thoughts
Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being there for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were mine. I will be specific about what I see, smell, feel, and I will accept my inner vision as fully as possible. I will enjoy my vision, then let it go and move on in my day, releasing it with no thought of controlling it further. I will let it happen, if it is right for me, in God's time.
All good things are possible for me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
When you start the day with quiet meditation, you create a consciousness of serenity and peace. At anytime during the day you can bring your mind back to this moment.
When things get hectic or stressful, I bring my awareness back to the peace that I create now.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Sometimes before you can have a spiritual awakening, you have to have some rude awakenings.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Say I can search my own heart and discover whether my intentions are for positive or constructive reasons. Today I can trust that when I come from good and love, I am making the right choices.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Daily meditation for about twenty minutes is recommended for all in recovery - unless you're very busy, then you should do half an hour. - Anon.
bluidkiti
07-03-2015, 10:17 AM
July 4
Daily Reflections
A NATURAL FAITH
. . . deep down in every man, woman and child, is the fundamental idea
of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other
things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a Power
greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power
in human lives, are facts as old as man himself.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 55
I have seen the workings of the unseen God in A.A. rooms around the
country. Miracles of recovery are everywhere in evidence. I now
believe that God is in these rooms and in my heart. Today faith is as
natural to me, a former agnostic, as breathing, eating and sleeping.
The Twelve Steps have helped to change my life in many ways, but none is
more effective than the acquisition of a Higher Power.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In Alcoholics Anonymous there is no thought of individual profit. No
greed or gain. No membership fees, no dues. Only voluntary
contributions of our money and ourselves. All that we hope for is
sobriety and regeneration, so that we can live normal, respectable
lives and can be recognized by others as men and women willing to do
unto others as we would be done by. These things we accomplish by
the help of each other, by following the twelve steps and by the grace
of God. Am I willing to work for A.A. without material gain to myself?
Meditation For The Day
What is sometimes called by religion as conversion is often only the
discovery of God as a friend in need. What is sometimes called
religion is often only the experiencing of the help and strength of
God's power in our lives. What is sometimes called holiness is often
only the invitation of God to be our Friend. As God becomes your
friend, you become a friend to others. We experience true human
friendship and from this experience we can imagine what kind of
Great Friend God can be. We believe Him to be a tireless, selfless, all
conquering, miracle-working Friend. We can reach out to the Great
Friend and figuratively take His hand in ours.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may think of God as a Great Friend in need. I pray that I
may go along with Him.
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As Bill Sees It
Boomerang, p. 185
When I was ten, I was tall and gawky, and smaller kids could push me around in quarrels.
I remember being very depressed for a year or more, and then I began to develop fierce
resolve to win.
One day, my grandfather came along with a book about Australia and told me, "This
books says that nobody but an Australian bushman knows how to make and throw a
boomerang."
"Here's my chance," I thought. "I will be the first man in America to make and throw a
boomerang." Well, any kid could have a notion like that. It might have lasted two days
or two weeks. But mine was a power drive that kept on for six months, till I made a
boomerang that swung around the church yard in front of the house and almost hit my
grandfather in the head when it came back.
Emotionally, I had begun the fashioning of another sort of boomerang, one that almost
killed me later on.
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Walk In Dry Places
Our common knowledge
Progress
One guiding factor in 12 Step groups is the sharing of experience and knowledge. The fact that a few people seem especially gifted as speakers and workers doesn't relieve us of the need for every person's participation.
Such group efforts are important to all human progress. For every outstanding person, there are hundreds who contribute to the success of any venture.
What we bring to the group is our experience as well as a strong commitment to the group's purpose. This makes our meetings warm, interesting, and helpful. The group can always be such a center if its members really are part of it.
I'll remind myself today that I can draw stength from the group and also make it stronger with my participation.
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Keep It Simple
I have a dream.---Martin Luther King Jr.
During our addiction, maybe we dreamed of joy and laughter with our family---only to find tears and anger. Maybe we dreamed of respect at our job---only to be fired. Our dreams began to feel like burdens. We had lost hope.
With recovery, the hope starts to return. We start to trust ourselves again. We start to trust others again. We start to trust in our Higher Power. Over time, we even dare to dream again. In our dreams, we are loving people. We have something to offer others. We are not scared. This is a sign that hope is returning. We fall in love again with the world, our Higher Power, and ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for giving back my future. Thank-you for giving back my dreams.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll tell my dreams to a friend. Do my future dreams include improving myself through the program?
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Each Day a New Beginning
One doesn't recognize in one's life the really important moments--not until it's too late. --Agatha Christie
Every moment is special and offers us an opportunity--to let an experience change us in an important way, to invite another person into our life, to nurture the growing, changing woman within. Life's events move so rapidly we seldom relish the moments individually, but each day teems with tiny gifts divinely designed for our well-being. The woman smiled at in the grocery store yesterday or the man acknowledged on the bus last week felt special. And we were softened, too, by our expression.
We change, and we change our world when we acknowledge one another's presence in it. The wonderful reality is that we are in another's world because of the special qualities we each have and are able to share with one another.
For many of us, in times past, no moment felt important. The days were simply long and painful. But now, we can relish even the past pain for what it taught us. We know now that we can look to this day before us with expectation. We can be conscious of every moment, thankful for every experience and every person we encounter.
In this inner game of life, I share the court, and I will have my turn to serve. To really live, I must participate fully.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person at once? Were we kind and loving toward all? What could we have done better? Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? Or were we thinking of what we could do for others, of what we could pack into the stream of life? But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. After making our review we ask God’s forgiveness and inquire what corrective measures should be taken.
p. 86
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Housewife Who Drank At Home
She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything.
I had been brought up to believe in God, but I know that until I found this A.A. program, I had never found or known faith in the reality of God, the reality of His power that is now with me in everything I do.
p. 300
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Businesswomen in A.A. will naturally find that many of these questions apply to them, too. But the alcoholic housewife can also make the family financially insecure. She can juggle charge accounts, manipulate the food budget, spend her afternoons gambling, and run her husband into debt by irresponsibility, waste, and extravagance.
p. 51
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Faith isn't faith until it's all you're holding on to.
--unknown
Who dares to teach must never cease to learn.
--John Cotton Dana
I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second
time into things that I am most certain of the first time.
--Josh Billings
A lot of growing up takes place between "It fell" and "I dropped it."
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together.
--Robert C. Dodds
Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.
--unknown
LIVE and let live
EASY does it
BUT for the grace of God
THINK think think
FIRST things first
When put in this order five of our sayings produce a sixth saying by
taking the first word of each one to make the sixth: LIVE EASY BUT
THINK FIRST.
--unknown
An old timer had shared in the meeting about praying for something,
and that God had answered her request. Someone asked her, "How
do you know it was God who granted your request?"
She replied... "I didn't ask anyone else."
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FREEDOM
"Freedom is nothing else but a
chance to be better."
--Albert Camus
Human beings are not puppets. Sometimes when you hear people talk
about God and prayer, they imply that we have no choice and that all
actions in life are determined by God alone: a moment's reflection
should make us hesitate from such a viewpoint. Murder, rape, child
molestation and prejudice do not stem from God but are the results of
God's gift of freedom to mankind.
Addicts and alcoholics need to comprehend on a daily basis that
prayers that are not accompanied by actions are mere words. God's
love for man does not obliterate man's need to love himself through
choice and decision. Sobriety and serenity should be experienced in
our lives when divinity is revealed in our choice.
God, help me to appreciate my involvement in my desire to be a
winner.
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..."but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me."
Philippians 3:12
Open Thou mine eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of Thy law.
Psalm 119:18
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Daily Inspiration
To make no decision can be worse than making a wrong decision. Lord, help me to be an active part of my life and to realize that no decision is so firm that it can't be modified, corrected or improved on as time passes.
Worry about nothing, pray for everything, and thank God for His answers. Lord, I ask You to handle my problems with me and care for my needs.
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NA Just For Today
Conflict
"We learn that conflicts are a part of reality, and we learn new ways to resolve them instead of running from them."
Basic Text, p.87
From time to time, we all experience conflicts. It may be that we just can't get along with that new co-worker. Maybe our friends are driving us crazy. Or perhaps our partner isn't living up to our expectations. Dealing with any conflict is difficult for recovering addicts.
When tempers rise, it is often a good idea to back away from the situation until cooler minds prevail. We can always return for further discussion when we have calmed down. We can't avoid troubling situations, but we can use time and distance to find perspective.
Conflict is a part of life. We can't go through our entire recovery without encountering disagreements and differences of opinion. Sometimes we can back away from these situations, taking time to reflect on them, but there always comes a time when conflict must be resolved. When that time comes, we take a deep breath, say a prayer, and apply the principles our program has given us: honesty, openness, responsibility, forgiveness, trust, and all the rest. We didn't get clean to keep running from life-and in recovery, we don't have to run anymore.
Just For Today: The principles my program has given me are sufficient to guide me through any situation. I will strive to confront conflict in a healthy way.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In Micronesian, there's a word, kukaro, which has no corresponding word in English. When people say they are going to kukaro, they mean they are going to relax, sit around, and hang out. They are being, not doing. --Eli and Beth Halpern
As children, our best times are often trips to an amusement park, fishing at the lake, camping, or just sitting idly under a tree. These make the best memories, and times sitting around a campfire roasting marshmallows or having a root beer after a family outing seem to bring out the love we share.
We don't seem to be accomplishing anything at these times. No chores are getting done around the house, no schoolwork, no repairs, no moneymaking.
But these times of peace, relaxation, and a sense of endless time of being, not doing, may be essential to our ability to get other things done later. Certainly we are most receptive to our feelings, new ideas, and unplanned adventures at these moments. Maybe we should add kukaro to our vocabulary.
What timeless thing can I do today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Freedom means the right to be different, the right to be oneself. --Ira Eisenstein
Each of us is a unique creature and has special gifts to contribute to the world. We were not free in the past because we were slaves to addictions and codependency. We know that freedom is precious. Compulsions and pressures for conformity stifle our creativity and erode our dignity. As we grow in our relationship to our Higher Power, we get stronger and more balanced in our unique qualities. Some of us have a talent for empathizing with others, some for writing and art, others for sports and physical activities.
There is no recipe that prescribes exactly what kind of men we should be. Because we're free, it is our creative task to discover what it means to be honest, masculine, contributing men within our particular circumstances. We don't get a list of directions for each day, only guidelines for progress. Through groups and friendships, we develop in our own ways and learn to respect each other's freedom.
I am grateful for the freedom to be uniquely and fully myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
One doesn't recognize in one's life the really important moments--not until it's too late. --Agatha Christie
Every moment is special and offers us an opportunity--to let an experience change us in an important way, to invite another person into our life, to nurture the growing, changing woman within. Life's events move so rapidly we seldom relish the moments individually, but each day teems with tiny gifts divinely designed for our well-being. The woman smiled at in the grocery store yesterday or the man acknowledged on the bus last week felt special. And we were softened, too, by our expression.
We change, and we change our world when we acknowledge one another's presence in it. The wonderful reality is that we are in another's world because of the special qualities we each have and are able to share with one another.
For many of us, in times past, no moment felt important. The days were simply long and painful. But now, we can relish even the past pain for what it taught us. We know now that we can look to this day before us with expectation. We can be conscious of every moment, thankful for every experience and every person we encounter.
In this inner game of life, I share the court, and I will have my turn to serve. To really live, I must participate fully.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Celebrate
Take time to celebrate.
Celebrate your successes, your growth, and your accomplishments. Celebrate you and who you are.
For too long you have been too hard on yourself. Others have spilled their negative energy - their attitudes, beliefs, and pain - on you. It had nothing to do with you! All along, you have been a gift to yourself and to the Universe.
You are a child of God. Beautiful, a delight, a joy. You do not have to try harder, be better, be perfect, or be anything you are not. Your beauty is in you, just as you are each moment.
Celebrate that.
When you have a success, when you accomplish something, enjoy it. Pause, reflect, and rejoice. Too long you have listened to admonitions not to feel good about what you have done, lest you travel the downward road to arrogance.
Celebration is a high form of praise, of gratitude to the Creator for the beauty of God's creation. To enjoy and celebrate the good does not mean that it will be taken from you. To celebrate is to delight in the gift, to show gratitude.
Celebrate your relationships! Celebrate the lessons from the past and the love and warmth that are there today. Enjoy the beauty of others and their connection to you.
Celebrate all that is in your life. Celebrate all that is good. Celebrate you!
Today, I will indulge in the joy of celebrating.
Today I will find someone less fortunate than I and give them what I can. Today I will let go of my own troubles and self pity by finding someone I can help. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Learn to Relax
We need to learn how to relax, how to unwind.
Find something that’s relaxing, healing, soothing, and available to you. Sit in the sun. Take a trip to a nearby hot spring or mineral bath in your state. Perch atop a mountain or hill, taking in the view from above.
Let yourself sit and soak it in for a long as you can. Let yourself be still for as long as you can. Move around a bit if you need to. Then go back and try again.
Don’t just do it once. Try it often. Allow yourself to relax. Give yourself opportunities to unwind. Soon you’ll learn how.
Pay attention to what you think and feel when you try to relax. Watch, as a neutral observer, without judgement or reproach. What thoughts come to mind? How do you feel? What do you feel?
Go as deeply into your thoughts and feelings as you are able. Sit quietly for as long as you can. When your body is done, it will tell you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Celebrate your freedom
Today in the United States, we celebrate our nation’s independence. Why not take a moment to celebrate your independence as well? Whether you’ve found freedom from an addiction or from codependency, or you’ve discovered the freedom to live your life as fully as possible, take a moment to honor and acknowledge how much that freeom means to you.
It’s good to identify our problems. Through the awareness of what’s wrong and what’s broken, we learn what to repair and fix. It’s good to focus on the health and the goodness in our lives,too. Becoming aware of what’s right and what’s working is how we discover joy.
Look back along the winding road of the path of your life. See how far you’ve come? It looks good to me. How does it look to you?
Hurray! We’re finally free.
God, thank you for setting me free.
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Food for Thought
Holidays
Holidays come and holidays go. Our choice remains the same: to abstain or to overeat.
Most holidays are associated with an overabundance of special food. Those who are not compulsive overeaters may be able to indulge for a day. We cannot. For us, one day’s indulgence is usually the start of a downward skid into loss of control and the despair, which follows. What kind of a celebration is it if we end up back in the trap of compulsive overeating?
Every day we may celebrate our freedom by abstaining. When holidays come, we enjoy them more by abstaining than we ever did by indulging. We are free from guilt and remorse and the terrible panic that seizes us when we lose control. We are free to think about the deeper significance of the holiday-whatever the celebration, it is more than a reason to eat and drink.
When abstinence remains the most important part of our life, no matter what day it is, then every day is a celebration and holidays are blessings instead of disasters.
Lord, may I celebrate this day and every day by abstaining.
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A Concrete Dream
Goals by Madisyn Taylor
It is vital to take action on your goals in life rather than just daydreaming about them.
Our desires act as fuel, propelling us toward new horizons. Without something to strive for, we stagnate and become stuck in ruts of our own making because we are unsure of what to do next. Goals are the dreams that we are willing to work for. When we set goals, we take responsibility for our lives and choose to wholeheartedly devote ourselves to our aspirations. Even if we only take the smallest steps toward achieving our ambitions, it is vital that we actively pursue our goals rather than just daydreaming about them. Having goals makes us feel good because it adds a sense of purpose and direction to our lives.
When you endeavor to achieve clear and quantifiable goals, your choices and actions take on new significance. Consciously creating your goals can help ensure that the success you seek is attainable and serves you. Your plan must be conceivable, tangible, and measurable. If you cannot visualize your goal in great detail or believe that you can realize them, you may find it difficult to commit to your goals and take the necessary steps to achieve them. Make sure that your goals have the potential to be emotionally satisfying. You may even want to write them down. Putting your goals into words can keep your intention fresh in your mind and remind you of your purpose. As you make progress toward realizing your goals, give yourself a reward each time you take a step forward so that you have the incentive to keep going. If you find yourself stuck in a rut, examine ways in which you can revise your strategy so that your plan can work.
In creating goals, you create your future by outlining your destiny. When you choose your goals using your head and heart, you take the first step in manifesting what you want. You grant your own wishes every time you achieve another goal. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
It’s time for me to start being responsible for my own actions. It’s time for me to be willing to take some chances. If my new life in The Program is valid and right, as I truly believe, then surely it can stand the test of exposure to real-life situations and problems. So I won’t be afraid to be human and, if necessary, to sometimes fall on my face in the process of living. Living is what The Program is all about. And living entails sharing, accepting, giving — interacting with other people. Now is the time for me to put my faith into action. Have I begun to practice what I preach by putting my new thoughts and ideas into action?
Today I Pray
May The Program, with God’s help, give me a chance to live a steady, creative, outreaching life, so that I may share with others what has been given to me. May I realize on this Declaration of Independence Day that I, too, have a celebration of freedom — freedom from my addiction.
Today I Will Remember
To celebrate my personal freedom.
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One More Day
Judge a tree from its fruit; not from the leaves.
– Duripides
Sometimes we have a tendency to judge too quickly. Unfortunately, this is particularly true when we see people who are obviously physically impaired. We may form opinions of them based only on the fact that they walk differently or perhaps because they use a wheelchair.
We can judge people as individuals — not because of a medical condition. We can understand that people make their own individual marks on the world, not so much because of their physical abilities, but because of their mental and spiritual presence.
I will look beyond the external features of people and find the unique qualities within.
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One Day At A Time
YES AND NO
“Let your ‘no’ be ‘no’ and your ‘yes’ be ‘yes.’”
The Bible, Book of James
The disease of compulsive eating really warps a person's life. Many compulsive overeaters become people-pleasers and do not know how to set boundaries. We end up not being able to say "No." However, we also end up saying "Yes" to our disease. In the depths of our disease we lose complete control in our lives.
This program of recovery helps us to set our lives back in order. When we give our disease over to our Higher Power, work the Twelve Steps and practice the principles of our program, we see that our lives can be turned around ~ and daily we have victory over our disease.
One day at a time...
I will say "No" to my disease and "Yes" to recovery by working the Twelve Steps, surrendering to my Higher Power, and living the principles of my program.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
But we saw that it really worked for others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We make two great choices in life: one, the decision to get clean and sober; the other, the choice to stay that way.
God, as I understand You, help me stay away from that first fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort for this hour.
Standing in Self
Today, I own the truth of my recovery. If I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home - to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me.
Thank you, life, for letting me see this.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We make two great choices in life: one, the decision to get clean and sober; the other, the choice to stay that way.
God, as I understand You, help me stay away from that first fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort for this hour.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you put sobriety first, everything you put second will be first class.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will find someone less fortunate than I and give them what I can. Today I will let go of my own troubles and self pity by finding someone I can help.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My mind would have killed me but it needed me for transportation. - Bob E.
bluidkiti
07-04-2015, 09:34 AM
July 5
Daily Reflections
A NEW DIRECTION
Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient;
they failed utterly. . . Every day is a day when we must carry the
vision of God's will into all our activities.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.45,85
I hear talk of the "weak-willed" alcoholic, but I am one of the
strongest-willed people on earth! I now know that my incredible
strength of will is not enough to save my life. My problem is not one of
"weakness," but rather of direction. When I, without falsely
diminishing myself, accept my honest limitations and turn to God's
guidance, my worst faults become my greatest assets. My strong will,
rightly directed, keeps me working until the promises of the program
become my daily reality.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Until we came into A.A. most of us had tried desperately to stop
drinking. We were filled with the delusion that we could drink like our
friends. We tried time and again to take it or leave it, but we could do
neither. We always lapsed into ceaseless, unhappy drinking. Families,
friends, and employers threw up their hands in hurt bewilderment, in
despair, and finally in disgust. We wanted to stop. We realized that
every reason for drinking was only a crazy excuse. Have I given up
every excuse for drinking?
Meditation For The Day
Many things can upset you and you can easily get off the track. But
remember that God is near you all the time, ready to help you if you
call on Him. You cannot forever stand against God's will for you, nor
can you, forever upset God's plan for your life, even though Gods plan
may be postponed by your willfulness and deliberate choice of evil. A
whole world of men and women cannot permanently change God's
laws nor His purpose for the universe. The sea of life may look very
rough to us, but we can believe that our Captain steers the boat on a
straight course.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to steer a straight course. I pray that I may
accept God's direction in my life's journey.
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As Bill Sees It
"The Only Requirement. . .", p. 186
In Tradition Three, A.A. is really saying to every serious drinker, "You are an A.A. member if you say so. You can declare yourself in; nobody can keep you out. No matter how low you've gone, no matter how grave your emotional complications--even your crimes--we don't want to keep you out. We just want to be sure that you get the same
chance for sobriety that we've had."
<< << << >> >> >>
We do not wish to deny anyone his chance to recover from alcoholism. We wish to be just as inclusive as we can, never exclusive.
1. 12 & 12, p. 139
2. Grapevine, August 1946
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Walk In Dry Places
What brings change?
Inventory.
In human affairs, vast changes sometimes take place almost spontaneously, bringing on revolutionary upheavals. What brings about such change?
These visible changes, for good or bad, occur because people come to accept new ideas. It's easy to see how this works in one person's life, but it works in the same way with socities.
The 12 Step movement is a most dramatic form of such change. We've become effective b ecause we have new forms of thinking to replace the old destructive forms that caused so much harm. Our movement will grow and develop only as long as we retain the new ways of thinging that first brought about this change.
I'll hold to the idea that my life can only be as good as the thoughts I choose.
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Keep It Simple
If at first you don't succeed, you're running about average.---Ovid
Our program speaks of spiritual progress, not perfection. We can take all the time we need. Our bottom line is steady progress. We can ask ourselves, "Am I a little more spiritual than I was a year ago? A month ago?" If the answer is yes, we're doing great. If the answer is no, we should look at why.
Our illness pushes us to be prefect. In recovery, we learn that we are free to be what we are---human. Even the world's fastest runners are average in most other areas of their lives.. This is okay. Remember, "spiritual progress, not perfection."
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I'll not be ashamed of how average I am. I'll remember I'm average---and that's good.
Action for the Day: I'll list what is average about me. I'll share this with a friend. Than I'll ask my friend what is special about me.
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Each Day a New Beginning
There are really only two ways to approach life--as victim or as gallant fighter--and you must decide if you want to act or react, deal your own cards or play with a stacked deck. And if you don't decide which way to play with life, it always plays with you.
--Merle Shain
Being the victim is, or was, uncomfortably familiar to many of us. Perhaps some of us are only now realizing we have choices, that we need not let life happen to us. Becoming responsible to ourselves, choosing behavior, beliefs, friends, activities, that please us, though unfamiliar at first, soon exhilarates us. The more choices we make, the more alive we feel. The more alive we feel, the healthier our choices.
Our aim is recovery. Recovering means participating fully in our lives. It means self-assessment and self-direction. It means trusting to move forward, step-by-step, choice-by-choice, knowing all the while that no thoughtful action can trouble us.
Many opportunities to make choices will present themselves today. The choices I make will satisfy me; they will move me toward my goal of recovery.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
p. 86
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
I am a Physician, licensed to practice in a western state. I am also an alcoholic. In two ways I may be a little different from other alcoholics. First, we all hear at A.A. meetings about those who have lost everything, those who have been in jail, those who have been in prison, those who have lost their families, those who have lost their income. I never lost any of it. I never was on skid row. I made more money in the last year of my drinking than I made in my whole life. My wife never hinted that she would leave me. Everything that I touched from grammar school on was successful. I was president of my grammar school body. I was president of all of my classes in high school, and in my last year I was president of that student body. I was president of each class in the university, and president of that student body. I was voted the man most likely to succeed. The same thing occurred in medical school. I belong to more medical societies and honor societies than men ten to twenty years my senior.
p. 301
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
But all alcoholics who have drunk themselves out of jobs, family, and friends will need to cross-examine themselves ruthlessly to determine how their own personality defects have thus demolished their security.
pp. 51-52
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God, guide me in making my commitments. Give me the courage to
make those that are right for me, the wisdom to not commit to that
which does not feel right, and the patience to wait until I know.
--Melody Beattie
Gratitude is our most direct line to God and the angels. If we take the
time, no matter how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something
to be thankful for. The more we seek gratitude, the more reason the
angels will give us for gratitude and joy to exist in our lives.
--Terry Lynn Taylor
Wisdom is using those things that work for you, for as long as they
work for you, and letting go of the things that are not working for you.
--John-Roger
"Allow God to speak through you and smile upon the earth through
you, because you are an unconditional giver, a purposeful being."
--Dr. Wayne Dyer
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will
ever regret.
--Ambrose Bierce
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FORGIVENESS
"Without forgiveness life is
governed by . . . an endless cycle
of resentment and retaliation."
--Roberto Assagioli
So much of what I resent in others springs from my unhappiness with
self. I hate in others what I know to be in myself: arrogance, pride,
narrow-mindedness, snobbery and dishonesty.
Today I am learning that as long as I refuse to forgive others, I am not
capable of forgiving myself. Part of my denial is reflected in my
attitudes towards others. Those character traits I refuse to forgive in
others are buried within myself. I know that without forgiveness there
is no freedom -- and I wish to grow in freedom.
Today I am learning the difference between forgiveness and
acceptance. I can forgive other people without accepting their
lifestyle. I can forgive myself and still see the need for change. In my
forgiveness is the hope for tomorrow.
Master, You taught that without forgiveness, there can be no pure
love. Help me grow in the forgiveness of self and others.
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Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
1 Peter 1:8-9
As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when
you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy
in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy."
1 Peter 1:14-16
Through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and
glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God. Now that you
have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere
love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart. For
you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable,
through the living and enduring word of God. For, "All men are like
grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass
withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever."
1 Peter 1:21-25
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Daily Inspiration
If you want those around you calm, you must be calm. Lord, when life becomes frantic, help me focus on solutions and restore the peace that the events of the moment try to destroy.
We are not always what we ought to be or want to be, but through God's love we are not what we would be without Him. Lord, thank you for raising me to heights in this world that alone I could not reach and for giving me eternal life in the next.
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NA Just For Today
Exploring Spiritual Options
"The nature of our belief will determine the manner of our prayers and meditation."
Basic Text, p.43
How do we pray? For each NA member, this is a deeply personal matter. Many of us find that, over time, we develop a manner of prayer and meditation based on what we learn from others and what we are comfortable with.
Some of us arrive in NA with a closed mind toward a Power greater than ourselves. But when we sit down with our sponsor and discuss our difficulty, looking at the Second Step in depth, we are pleased to find that we can choose any concept of a Higher Power that appeals to us.
Just as our definition of a Power greater than ourselves differs from addict to addict, so does our manner of achieving a "conscious contact" Some attend religious services; some chant; some sit quietly or talk with whatever is out there; some find a spiritual connection by communing with nature. The "right way" to pray and meditate is whatever way helps us improve our conscious contact with our own Higher Power.
Asking others how they found their spiritual guidance is always a good place to begin. Reading literature before we enter periods of meditation can also help us. Many have gone before us on this search. As we seek spiritual growth, we can greatly benefit from their experience.
Just for today: I will explore my options for improving my conscious contact with the God of my understanding.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In uplifting, get underneath. --George Ade
A sandpile in the summer is deceiving. The topmost sand burns hot on our
feet. But as we push down toward the center, we come to a damp, cool
place that soothes and oozes between our toes.
The nature of most things is not revealed at the surface. Like the
sandpile, many people and situations we encounter are, on the surface,
downright uncomfortable. The reward is in digging deeper--to the
essential goodness, the core or meaning, the true friend. It takes time,
a little knowledge, and abundant trust that we will not be burned.
What have I discovered by digging a little lately?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We shall describe conditions of the soul that words can only hint at. We shall have to use logic to try to corner perspectives that laugh at our attempt. --Huston Smith
As we live the spiritual life, we find words and logic are only capable of pointing in the direction of some truths. Words do not contain the entire truth our experience may be teaching us. This is like the difference between hearing about fishing versus actually being on the water, smelling the misty air, and feeling the fish tug on our line.
Spiritual development is a form of education. We are developing the part of us that learns by experience, that has a feeling without exactly knowing why, that understands stories better than statistics. Gradually, we accept more experiences in our lives as mysteries, as not fitting into any specific categories. Many experiences will have more meaning than cold facts could ever express. As this side of us develops, we don't discard reason and judgment; we become deeper human beings.
Today, I will give my intuition more freedom. That will help my spiritual self grow.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There are really only two ways to approach life--as victim or as gallant fighter--and you must decide if you want to act or react, deal your own cards or play with a stacked deck. And if you don't decide which way to play with life, it always plays with you.
--Merle Shain
Being the victim is, or was, uncomfortably familiar to many of us. Perhaps some of us are only now realizing we have choices, that we need not let life happen to us. Becoming responsible to ourselves, choosing behavior, beliefs, friends, activities, that please us, though unfamiliar at first, soon exhilarates us. The more choices we make, the more alive we feel. The more alive we feel, the healthier our choices.
Our aim is recovery. Recovering means participating fully in our lives. It means self-assessment and self-direction. It means trusting to move forward, step-by-step, choice-by-choice, knowing all the while that no thoughtful action can trouble us.
Many opportunities to make choices will present themselves today. The choices I make will satisfy me; they will move me toward my goal of recovery.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Survivor Guilt
We begin recovering. We begin taking care of ourselves. Our recovery program starts to work in our life, and we begin to feel good about ourselves.
Then it hits. Guilt.
Whenever we begin to experience the fullness and joy of life, we may feel guilty about those we've left behind - those not recovering, those still in pain. This survivor guilt is a symptom of codependency.
We may think about the husband we've divorced who is still drinking. We may dwell on a child, grown or adult, still in pain. We may get a phone call from a nonrecovering parent who relates his or her misery to us. And we feel pulled into their pain.
How can we feel so happy, so good, when those we love are still in misery? Can we really break away and lead satisfying lives, despite their circumstances? Yes, we can.
And yes, it hurts to leave behind those we love. But keep moving forward anyway. Be patient. Other people's recovery is not our job. We cannot make them recover. We cannot make them happy.
We may ask why we were chosen for a fuller life. We may never know the answer. Some may catch up in their own time, but their recovery is not our business. The only recovery we can truly claim is our own.
We can let go of others with love, and love ourselves without guilt.
Today, I am willing to work through my sadness and guilt. I will let myself be healthy and happy, even though someone I love has not chosen the same path.
I am very grateful to be exactly where I am today. I do not need to be a victim of my past or controlled by circumstances. I am in recovery today and it feels wonderful! --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Become Excited About Life
I woke up one morning and found myself in a strange place. Instead of waking up to pain, I felt a new feeling coursing through my veins. I felt happy, at peace, and excited about being alive. This feeling had come around before, but never to stay or last. Now I knew that it was mine for good. It was where this journey had led.
Let excitement course through you. It is vitality; it is healing, life-giving energy. It is the life force. Feel it course through your veins. This excitement you are feeling is different from the pain of years past. It is a different feeling, but your birthright, my birthright, the birthright of us all. It is your reward for staying committed to your process of learning and growing.
Continue to clear out old, negative feelings and outdated beliefs. Stay committed to healing and discovering your soul, even when you wonder if it’s worth it. Even when you wonder where your path is going, or if it’s going anywhere. Love yourself. Love others. Then love yourself some more. Love yourself until you feel the life force, this exciting new energy, course through you.
Stay committed to your growth process until you wake up one morning and ask yourself, What is that strange thing I’m feeling? Then know what the answer is. The answer is joy.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Balance
In Western medicine, the practice has long been the correction of problems. We have a pain; the doctor identifies its source and treats it. The Eastern approach is different. Many of the Eastern medicines operate from the idea that a healthy body is one that is in balance. When we are sick, it is due to an imbalance in our bodies. The practitioner then seeks to identify the imbalance and restore the body to balance.
Instead of just treating the symptoms of pathos, Eastern medicines seek to maintain balance as a way of life.
That’s a good way to approach taking care of our souls.
Perhaps your heart has been injured through the carelessness of another, or maybe your mind is troubled by distressing, uncomfortable, and sometimes wrong thoughts. When we seek to restore balance, our hearts and our souls will heal.
Be aware of the imbalance in the thoughts in your mind and the emotions disturbing your peace. Then listen to your spirit. Let it tell you in its still quiet way what it needs to regain balance. Maybe you need some time alone, time in meditation or prayer, a quiet walk, a day at the zoo, or some sleep.
Give your body and soul what you need to regain balance, and then healing can begin. Learn to lovingly listen to and take care of yourself.
Maintain balance as a way of life.
God, help me listen to my spirit so I can restore myself to balance each day.
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Food for Thought
Ignore the Craving
Old habits die hard, and for a long time we may experience our old craving for that “small,” compulsive bite. The craving will not hurt us, and eventually it will pass if we ignore it. If we give in to the craving, it does not go away but becomes stronger. To feed the craving is to pour gasoline on a fire.
When we experience the craving for unnecessary food, we need to find something else to occupy our attention. If possible, we should physically remove ourselves from the tempting situation. If that is impossible, we need to ask our Higher Power for the strength to remain abstinent and to ignore the demands of our over blown appetite. God never allows us to be tempted beyond our ability to endure. He is always here to support us when we turn and ask for help.
May I listen to You and ignore harmful cravings.
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Grumps
Shining through the Clouds by Madisyn Taylor
We can shine like a beacon from a lighthouse when met with the force of a grumpy person.
When we’re in a good mood, we shine like the sun. But if we find ourselves in the presence of a person, or people, in a grumpy mood, it can feel like a dark cloud approaching to dim our radiance and block our positive way of seeing the world. We can remind ourselves that clouds pass, while the sun and stars continue to shine above. Then it’s easier to think of these “grumps” affectionately, knowing that they only have the power to affect our mood if we allow it. With the power of change firmly in our hands, we can choose how to respond to a grumpy person, or a grumbling group of people, with confidence and understanding.
Like a lighthouse, we can continue to shine through the darkness, offering our light to help others find their way back to their own. We can send them a silent prayer of peace or a sympathetic smile. We may sense that reaching out to offer a comforting touch or hug can ease their frustrations and cause the clouds to dissipate. If they need understanding, we can sympathize without reinforcing the negativity they may be experiencing by directing their attention someplace more positive. Helping them find the humor in their situation might be appropriate and is a great way to lift spirits, or a logical approach may help them see all the good in the situation, in their lives and in the world.
We might find that someone we encounter often seems to be in a perpetual state of gloom. Our tendency in such cases may be to try to avoid them, but instead we can make the choice to offer support that comes from the heart. We may be inspired to ask if they would like some help or to offer suggestions that have helped us in the past. We can include thoughts of their health and happiness in our times of prayer and meditation. When we lend our energy to uplift another in any way, we improve our own lives while making the world a better place for all of us. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I am free to be, to do, to accept, to reject. I am free to be the wise, loving, kind, and patient person I want to be. I’m free to do that which I consider wise — that which will in no way harm or hinder another person. I’m free to do that which will lead me into paths of peace and satisfaction. I’m free to decide for or against, to say no and to say yes. I’m free to live life in a productive way and to contribute what I have to give to life. Am I coming to believe that I’m free to be the best self I’m able to be?
Today I Pray
Let the freedom I am now experiencing continue to flow through my life into productiveness, into the conviction of life’s goodness I have always wanted to share. May I accept this freedom with God’s blessing — and use it wisely.
Today I Will Remember
Let freedom ring true.
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One More Day
When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another! – Helen Keller
When we toss a pebble into a pond, the widening concentric circles continue to spread — the ripple effect — long after the pebble is out of sight. Often the actions we take have similar results.
We don’t always know what effect our lives and choices will have on other people. The immediate effects of our daily lives are probably easier to gauge, but often we don’t see the long-term effect we have on others. And that really doesn’t matter because all we are urged to do is to let kindness and responsibility rule our decisions. The immediate effect we see is the sense of growth within ourselves; the long-term effect we can trust to be miracle that we may never see.
I’ll remember that my actions affect many people beyond me.
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One Day At A Time
OVERCOMING RELAPSE
"Come, whoever you are! Wanderer, worshiper,
Lover of Leaving. Come, this is not a caravan of despair.
It doesn't matter if you've broken your vow a thousand times.
Still, and yet again, come, come."
Rumi
Perhaps the best thing my recovery plan has given me is finding the gift of inspiration almost anywhere. The above quote is such an example. Mevlana Jelalu'ddin Rumi was a Persian poet and theologian who lived from 1207 to 1273. Rumi also seemed to understand recovery quite well, judging from this quote.
I have fallen so many times on my recovery path. Once down, the disease really starts talking to me. "You're already down; you may as well stay down," it will say. Or, "You screwed up your food plan, so you might as well eat this, too." On and on, it never fails.
That's why this quote from Rumi means so much to me. My Higher Power sent it as an invitation to begin again, however many times I need. Even if I slip over and over and over, I can always begin again. My Higher Power and this program of recovery are very forgiving, and I can pick up and move on. I needn't fear failure, because I only fail if I don't get up and forge ahead.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will remember that I may fall, but I can get up again. I can begin anew, and know that I will overcome relapse when I make a fresh start.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principle: we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom. - Pg. 62 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
All our past 'good intentions' were fragmentary at best, facades at worse. Some of us didn't mean to mess things up (some of us did mean to), always justifying our inadequacies by blaming parents, spouses, society, or God. This hour we must accept who we are, and stop looking around for the culprit--he is us!
May I recognize, as this program teaches, that I am at the root of my own problems and this hour, I can be at the root of my recovery.
Friendship
Today, I make choices about my company and friends. Whom I choose to spend time with is very important to me, and the relationships that I begin I wish to respect and nurture. A handful of dear friends is far more meaningful to me than lots of acquaintances. I choose to share myself where I feel a return of good feeling. I want both to have a friend and to be a friend. One of the unusual gifts of growing up in a dysfunctional household was that I learned the value of friendship because I had to turn to my friends to meet very deep needs. I am grateful for my friends, and for what I learned and felt from them.
I value friendship.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Try broadening your spiritual path by making your relationship with the Divine proactive. Ask not what the Universe can do for you, but rather what you can do for the Universe! Begin the morning with: Hi World, what can I do for You today?
Asking what I can do for the Creative Source will serve us both better than simply seeking what can be done for me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
There is no right way to do the wrong thing.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am very grateful to be exactly where I am today. I do not need to be a victim of my past or controlled by circumstances. I am in recovery today and it feels wonderful!
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
It says ( pg. 68. AA Big Book ) 'We put these fears on paper and ask ourselves why we had them. 'That's it. ( Yells ) I can't work these steps they're too difficult!! If they left you there, this could be difficult. If they left you with 'Why do I have these fears?' I could go back to 'It's Ma's fault: bad milk. It's my Dad's fault: bad example. But they don't leave me there. They tell us exactly why we have these fears: 'Wasn't it because self sufficiency failed us?' It's as simple as that. Do you know how much sense that makes to me? If I've got these fears and I've been relying on myself to remove them and I still have them, then obviously my power has failed me, so I better go to another power. How does that sound? Is that too tough? - Milt L.
bluidkiti
07-05-2015, 08:23 AM
July 6
Daily Reflections
IDENTIFYING FEAR . . . .
The chief activator of our defects has been self -
centered fear. . . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 76
When I feel uncomfortable, irritated, or depressed, I
look for fear. This "evil and corroding thread" is the
root of my distress: Fear of failure; fear of other's
opinions; fear of harm, and many other fears. I have
found a Higher Power who does not want me to live in
fear and, as a result, the experience of A.A. in my
life is freedom and joy. I am no longer willing to live
with the multitude of character defects that
characterized my life while I was drinking. Step Seven
is my vehicle to freedom from these defects. I pray for
help in identifying the fear underneath the defect, and
then I ask God to relieve me of that fear. This method
works for me without fail and is one of the great
miracles of my life in Alcoholics Anonymous.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We tried to study our alcoholic problem, wondering what
was the cause of our strange obsession. Many of us took
special treatments, hospitalization, even confinement in
institutions. In every case, the relief was only temporary.
We tried through crazy excuses to convince ourselves that
we knew why we drank, but we went on regardless. Finally
drinking had gone far beyond even a habit. We had become
alcoholics, men and women who had been destroying
themselves against their own will. Am I completely free
from my alcoholic obsession?
Meditation For The Day
"Ask and ye shall receive." Never let yourself think you
cannot do something useful or that you never will be able
to accomplish a useful task. The fact is that you can do
practically anything in the field of human relationships,
if you are willing to call on God's supply of strength. The
supply may not be immediately available, because you may
not be entirely ready to receive it. But it will surely come
when you are properly prepared for it. As you grow spiritually,
a feeling of being plentifully supplied by God's strength will
possess you and you will be able to accomplish many useful
things.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may claim God's supply of strength by my faith
in Him. I pray that it shall be given to me according to my faith.
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As Bill Sees It
Talk or Action?, p. 187
In making amends, it is seldom wise to approach an individual who still
smarts from our injustice to him, and announce that we have gone
religious. This might be called leading with the chin. Why lay ourselves
open to being branded fanatics or religious bores? If we do this, we may
kill a future opportunity to carry a beneficial message.
But the man who hears our amends is sure to be impressed with our
sincere desire to set right a wrong. He is going to be more interested in
a demonstration of good will than in talk of spiritual discoveries.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 77
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Walk In Dry Places
Should we Intervene?
Recovery
The method of conducting interventions is considered an effective way of confronting alcoholics and drug addicts. Interventions are done with the hope that this confrontation will "raise the bottom," and that the addict will face the condition before there's further anguish.
However effective interventions may be, they're not part of the 12 Step program. Our work is based on attraction, not the admitted coercion that's part of intervention.
If we take part in interventions, this separation should be clearly understood. The person who still suffers should know that the 12 Step program depends on attraction, not any of the other methods that might be available.
It's important to make this point clear, because the intervention may fail. Whether it does or not, the individual must not be left with the idea that intervention is a 12 Step activity. At any stage, the fellowship is always available to him or her.
I'll probably see lots of people today who need help in facing their addiction. I'll know that their recovery comes in God's good time.
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Keep It Simple
When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make lemonade.---Dale Carnegie
Our illness is one big lemon, but our recovery is lemonade. None of us signed up to be drunks or drugies, but we all signed up for recovery. That's when the happiness began. Yes, there will be pain, but the joy will far outweigh the pain. The sweet joy of recovery becomes our drink---our lemonade. And, do we drink!
We have new friends. We love ourselves, our Higher Power, our family, and much more. We are creative when we give joy, love and help to others and to ourselves. If your lemonade isn't sweet enough, add more of your program.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, it's easy to forget how much You've given me. Thank you for all the joy and love You have given me.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll write down what part of recovery I really enjoy. I will then share this list with my group or friend.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Peace, she supposed, was contingent upon a certain disposition of the soul, a disposition to receive the gift that only detachment from self made possible. --Elizabeth Goudge
Self-centeredness, egocentrism, and selfishness are familiar to most of us. We have judged our world and all the situations and people in it in terms of how their existence affects our own. We have become tied to him or to her or to a situation just as surely as an anchor to a boat. Most of us learned in very early childhood to read others' behaviors. And we determined our own worth accordingly.
As adult women we still struggle, trying to read another's actions, hoping to find acceptance. Which means we are always vulnerable, exposing our "self" to the whims of other, equally vulnerable "selves." What we search for is peace and security. We think if others love and accept us, we'll be at peace. We'll know serenity. A most important lesson for us to learn in this life is that peace is assured when we anchor ourselves to our God. Peace, well-being, serene joy will accompany our every step when we expose our vulnerable selves to God's care and only God's care. We'll no longer need to worry about the self we try to protect. It will be handled with care.
Peace awaits me today. I will look to God, and only God, to know that all is well, that I am all that I need to be.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. we relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it.
pp. 86-87
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
Mine was the skid row of success. The physical skid row in any city is miserable. The skid row of success is just as miserable.
p. 301
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
The most common symptoms of emotional insecurity are worry, anger, self-pity, and depression. These stem from causes which sometimes seem to be within us, and at other times to come from without. To take inventory in this respect we ought to consider carefully all personal relationships which bring continuous or recurring trouble. It should be remembered that this kind of insecurity may arise in any area where instincts are threatened. Questioning directed to this end might run like this: Looking at both past and present, what sex situations have caused me anxiety, bitterness, frustration, or depression? Appraising each situation fairly, can I see where I have been at fault? Did these perplexities beset me because of selfishness or unreasonable demands? Or, if my disturbance was seemingly caused by the behavior of others, why do I lack the ability to accept conditions I cannot change? These are the sort of fundamental inquiries that can disclose the source of my discomfort and indicate whether I may be able to alter my own conduct and so adjust myself serenely to self-discipline.
p. 52
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Love yourself and all your emotions.
Be as honest with yourself as you can be.
Say how you really feel.
--Melody Beattie
"And now here is my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the
heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye."
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Though we travel the world to find the beautiful, we must carry it
within us or we will find it not.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
God, help me to lower my defenses today, to be open to the good in
the people around me and to the good that I have to offer them.
--Melody Beattie
"Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do."
--John Wooden
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
POWER
"The measure of man is what he
does with power."
--Pittacus
With my recovery has come a certain success, and with the success
comes power. Power comes with the spiritual program, but it must be
exercised responsibly. Just as the disease used alcohol to destroy my
life, so it can use power to destroy me in sobriety. Power is a
doubled-edged sword that has led many back to drinking. Certainly an
abuse of power is not consistent with sobriety.
Today I am respectful of power because I know it can lead to an
inflated ego or an arrogant personality that continues to destroy the
quality of life. Today I surround myself with friends who will remind
me of my roots.
Teach me not to use my White Anglo-Saxon Protestant heritage to
belittle or patronize those from minority groups.
Teach me to exercise power responsibly.
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Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me--put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
Philippians 4:8-13
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Daily Inspiration
Make few promises and keep the ones you make. Lord, grant me the strength to keep my commitments, especially the ones that I make to myself.
Life is what our thinking makes it. Lord, help me visualize myself richly living each day, believing, achieving, and then succeeding.
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NA Just For Today
"I'm Sorry"
"The main thing the Eighth Step does for us is to help build awareness that, little by little, we are gaining new attitudes about ourselves and how we deal with other people."
Basic Text, p.38
To say "I'm sorry" probably isn't such a foreign idea to most of us. In our active addiction, it may have been a very familiar phrase. We were always telling people how sorry we were, and were probably deeply surprised when someone, tired of our meaningless apologies, responded with, "You sure are. In fact, you're the sorriest excuse for?" That may have been our first clue that an "I'm sorry" didn't really make any difference to those we harmed, especially when we both knew that we'd just do the same thing again.
Many of us thought that making amends would be another "I'm sorry." However, the action we take in those steps is entirely different. Making amends means to make changes and, above all, to make the situation right. If we stole money, we don't just say "I'm sorry. I'll never do it again now that I'm clean." We pay the money back. If we neglected or abused our families, we don't just apologize. We begin to treat them with respect.
Amending our behavior and the way we treat ourselves and others is the whole purpose of working the steps. We're no longer just "sorry"; we're responsible.
Just for today: I accept responsibility for myself and my recovery. Today, I will amend some particular thing I'm sorry for.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In uplifting, get underneath. --George Ade
A sandpile in the summer is deceiving. The topmost sand burns hot on our
feet. But as we push down toward the center, we come to a damp, cool
place that soothes and oozes between our toes.
The nature of most things is not revealed at the surface. Like the
sandpile, many people and situations we encounter are, on the surface,
downright uncomfortable. The reward is in digging deeper--to the
essential goodness, the core or meaning, the true friend. It takes time,
a little knowledge, and abundant trust that we will not be burned.
What have I discovered by digging a little lately?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We shall describe conditions of the soul that words can only hint at. We shall have to use logic to try to corner perspectives that laugh at our attempt. --Huston Smith
As we live the spiritual life, we find words and logic are only capable of pointing in the direction of some truths. Words do not contain the entire truth our experience may be teaching us. This is like the difference between hearing about fishing versus actually being on the water, smelling the misty air, and feeling the fish tug on our line.
Spiritual development is a form of education. We are developing the part of us that learns by experience, that has a feeling without exactly knowing why, that understands stories better than statistics. Gradually, we accept more experiences in our lives as mysteries, as not fitting into any specific categories. Many experiences will have more meaning than cold facts could ever express. As this side of us develops, we don't discard reason and judgment; we become deeper human beings.
Today, I will give my intuition more freedom. That will help my spiritual self grow.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There are really only two ways to approach life--as victim or as gallant fighter--and you must decide if you want to act or react, deal your own cards or play with a stacked deck. And if you don't decide which way to play with life, it always plays with you.
--Merle Shain
Being the victim is, or was, uncomfortably familiar to many of us. Perhaps some of us are only now realizing we have choices, that we need not let life happen to us. Becoming responsible to ourselves, choosing behavior, beliefs, friends, activities, that please us, though unfamiliar at first, soon exhilarates us. The more choices we make, the more alive we feel. The more alive we feel, the healthier our choices.
Our aim is recovery. Recovering means participating fully in our lives. It means self-assessment and self-direction. It means trusting to move forward, step-by-step, choice-by-choice, knowing all the while that no thoughtful action can trouble us.
Many opportunities to make choices will present themselves today. The choices I make will satisfy me; they will move me toward my goal of recovery.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Survivor Guilt
We begin recovering. We begin taking care of ourselves. Our recovery program starts to work in our life, and we begin to feel good about ourselves.
Then it hits. Guilt.
Whenever we begin to experience the fullness and joy of life, we may feel guilty about those we've left behind - those not recovering, those still in pain. This survivor guilt is a symptom of codependency.
We may think about the husband we've divorced who is still drinking. We may dwell on a child, grown or adult, still in pain. We may get a phone call from a nonrecovering parent who relates his or her misery to us. And we feel pulled into their pain.
How can we feel so happy, so good, when those we love are still in misery? Can we really break away and lead satisfying lives, despite their circumstances? Yes, we can.
And yes, it hurts to leave behind those we love. But keep moving forward anyway. Be patient. Other people's recovery is not our job. We cannot make them recover. We cannot make them happy.
We may ask why we were chosen for a fuller life. We may never know the answer. Some may catch up in their own time, but their recovery is not our business. The only recovery we can truly claim is our own.
We can let go of others with love, and love ourselves without guilt.
Today, I am willing to work through my sadness and guilt. I will let myself be healthy and happy, even though someone I love has not chosen the same path.
I am very grateful to be exactly where I am today. I do not need to be a victim of my past or controlled by circumstances. I am in recovery today and it feels wonderful! --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
See How Each Soul Has Touched You
Often in our lives, we don’t realize the significance of a relationship until later, when the experience has passed. Then we understand how the person helped us along the way, took us to the next part of our journey, opened us up to begin learning the next lesson. And we see how we, in turn, helped shape that person.
One evening, as I was readying for sleep, I had a vision. I saw clearly before me a scenario of the dance we do with each other. I saw in my heart, understood deeply, the tangible, shaping impact each soul had on my life. Each moment, each interaction with another person, had been important– the quiet interactions, the ones I barely noticed, and the more significant relationships. Each moment– the moments that hurt, the moments that brought joy– had helped. We had touched each other. We were joined in an intricate dance, a dance in which our souls learned and grew.
And we had taken our places with each other on time, for the dance was perfectly choreographed.
I could almost see us waving gleefully to each other, happy for how we had connected, joyful that we had helped each other learn the lessons of the soul: courage, love, forgiveness, gentleness, self-love.
See how each soul touches you? See how you touch them? Ask your heart to guide you with honesty, love, and responsibility in all your encounters. Honor the sacredness of love. Honor the lessons of planet earth and the people who help you learn them.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let the feelings go
Sometimes we get stuck on a feeling. We don’t want to acknowledge it and give it its due. So we tell ourselves we’re too intelligent or busy to feel that way. Maybe we’re scared of that feeling, afraid of what it might mean. We think if we feel that way, we’ll have to do something we don’t want to do. We’re afraid that feeling might mean we have to change. Or we think the feeling will mean we have to face a loss of something we value in our lives and don’t want to lose.
Sometimes we feel guilty about our emotions. We think it’s wrong to have that feeling; it makes us a bad person. So we tell ourselves we shouldn’t feel the way that we do.
We can become so used to a particular kind of feeling– such as anger, resentment, or fear– that it becomes a comfortable and familiar way to view our world.
We can use our feelings to control people: I feel this way when you do that, so don’t do that anymore. Some people call this using emotions to manipulate other people. It’s not a good thing to do. But some of us convince ourselves it’s the only way to get what we want.
Learn to say how it feels. Then learn to let that feeling go.
God, help me flow in the stream of my feelings.
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Food for Thought
Dual Personalities
It is as if we are each two people. When we are abstaining, we are calm, confident, and capable of handling the demands of every day. When we are in contact with our Higher Power, we have the right mental perspective and God’s peace and love in our hearts.
Slipping back into the old attitudes and habits of our compulsive overeating days brings back our frightened, confused, and despairing selves. We lose our ability to function efficiently. We are antagonistic to those around us. Worst of all, we are cut off from the source of strength and light.
Remembering that the negative personality will destroy us makes us more determined not to give in to it. Abstinence, day by day, is our safety. Reliance on the OA group, our Twelve Step program, and our Higher Power keeps us living the good, new life of freedom.
Deliver me from my negative personality.
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Interesting People Everywhere
Everyone Has a Story by Madisyn Taylor
Every person on this planet has a story to tell, something that makes them unique adding to the whole.
It’s easy to forget sometimes that everyone has a story to tell if we take the time to listen. We are so accustomed to hearing the stories of people in the news that we sometimes lose track of the fact that the random stranger on the bus also has a fascinating story about where they came from and how they got to be where they are. The sheer variety of paths taken in this world, from farmers to CEOs to homeless people to world travelers, is indicative of how much we can learn from each individual. Sometimes the shy, quiet person at work has the most amazing life story and the biggest dreams, it is up to us to take the time to find out.
Some people travel a path of wealth and privilege, while others struggle with only themselves to rely on, and both have great stories to tell. Each person learns lessons, makes choices, and develops a unique perspective, which only they can claim and share. Even two people who have had very similar lives will have slightly different experiences, leading them to a different point of view, so each person remains a treasure trove waiting to be explored. When we take the time to ask questions and listen, we find that every person has a fascinating story to tell and an utterly unique perspective from which to tell it.
Bearing this in mind, we have the opportunity to approach the world around us in a new way. There is never any reason to be bored at a party, or on the bus, or in a conversation with a stranger. When we retain the spark of curiosity and the warmth required to open someone up, we always have in front of us the makings of a great story. All we have to do is ask. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Some people in The Program don’t feel that they can do the things they want to do. They doubt their own ability. But actually, every person has untapped ability. We’re children of God, which should give us a strong clue as to the infinite nature of our ability. As spiritual beings, we’re unlimited. True, we may find it easier to accept this as true of some person who shines in a particular field. We may compare our own accomplishments with another’s and feel discouraged. But the only comparison we need make or should make is with ourselves. Am I a better, more productive person today?
Today I Pray
May I realize that I am a child of God. And His loving-parent promise to give me what I need, not what I might want, is His way of teaching me to be what I am, not what I dreamed I should be. As a spiritual being, I can truly become a productive person – perhaps even do some of the things I once felt unable to do without the aid of props — drinks, pills, excesses of food which hulled me into false confidence.
Today I Will Remember
To compare me with the old me.
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One More Day
Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have — so spend it wisely.
– Kay Lyons
Each day is a small fragment of a lifetime. This fact frees us to focus on the things we truly can influence. We can never return to the past, except within our memories. And we don’t know what the future holds in store. The only time we can “spend” is today; the only time we touch is right now.
The simplicity of the present allows us to let go of the past and to ignore the unknowns of the future. Thus freed, we can set about the business of enriching our lives physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Unpleasant debts to the past are paid, and we’ve mortgaged nothing to the future. We are free to invest in growth by using the “cash” we have on hand.
This day is a valuable piece of my life. I will spend it well.
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One Day At A Time
SUFFERING
“The desire to stop suffering
is not the same thing as the desire to stop the behavior
we are doing which causes us to suffer.”
Dr. James Golden
Our disease of addiction causes tremendous suffering to ourselves and to those around us. It consumes our lives and often leads to painful losses. No matter how profoundly we long to be rid of our disease, recovery is not something that falls into our laps just because we want it. We don’t magically stop being compulsive eaters just because that’s our desire. It would be great if recovery happened magically and all we’d have to do is say, "I don't want this disease any more; I don’t want to suffer any longer." If it were that easy, we'd immediately find ourselves in a place of complete and total recovery. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way.
In the depths of my disease I cried out to the God of my understanding to help me achieve abstinence and an alleviation of my suffering. What was the answer to my prayers? This wonderful Twelve Step program.
One of the first things I learned was that I could wish and hope and pray, but until I put feet to my prayers and actually started working the Steps, I wouldn’t recover from my disease. God will only do for us what He can do through us. If I’m not willing to do even a little bit of the work, I shouldn’t expect recovery. If I won’t take the first step on this journey, I can’t expect to reach my final destination. I can do some things for myself -- like putting the Steps into practice -- but what about the things I can’t do for myself? I’ll let God handle those.
One day at a time...
I’ll remember that it’s not enough
to want to stop suffering from my disease;
I also need to do some footwork to make it happen.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby wondering how his bill was to be paid. At one end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches. Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an aquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.
Of course he couldn't drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks - no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was the old, insidious insanity - that first drink. With a shiver, he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities - his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah - yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver. - Pgs. 154-155 - A Vision For You
( Note: This is when Bill Wilson is subsequently introduced to Dr. Bob )
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Stumbling blocks can become stepping stones if we use each adversity as a chance to practice our new way of life. Then problems become challenges so we can see what part of our program will solve them. What principle can you apply to your current situation?
Divine Intelligence encourages me not to escape my every problem, but face it and learn to practice this program in all my affairs.
Inside My Mind
Today, I am grateful to feel alive and to recognize that life is a spiritual journey. All my life circumstances are spiritual challenges, if I choose to look at them that way. Getting free of my own over-attachment to people, places, things and ideas, mistaking them for me, releases my spirit. Once my spirit is released, it can travel and experience the real beauty of life. Life surrounds me; it is inside, outside and everywhere. If I am free and still inside, life is there. If I am not ruminating and filling my mind with unnecessary preoccupations - life is there, spirit is there - waiting to be seen and felt.
I allow my mind its freedom.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Since life is 10% actuality and 90% re-actuality you must chose your reactions carefully. The program has given you choice and how you choose to react to this day can make the difference between simply being dry or being sober.
I live today as I want to remember my life.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you're happy, notify your face. If you're not, notify your sponsor.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is a great relief to know that all I have to do is turn to the twelve steps of recovery and help is with me today. Today I am given all the tools that I need and I am so grateful that I no longer have to struggle alone.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I got sicker, quicker, on less liquor. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
07-06-2015, 08:14 AM
July 7
Daily Reflections
. . . AND LETTING GO OF IT
. . . primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed
or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis
of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual
disturbance and frustration. Therefore, no peace was to be had
unless we could find a means of reducing these demands. The
difference between a demand and a simple request is plain to
anyone.
12 & 12, p.76
Peace is possible for me only when I let go of expectations. When
I'm trapped in thoughts about what I want and what should be
coming to me, I'm in a state of fear or anxious anticipation and
this is not conducive to emotional sobriety. I must surrender--over
and over--to the reality of my dependence on God, for then I find
peace, gratitude and spiritual security.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We had become hopelessly sick people; spiritually, emotionally,
and physically. The power that controlled us was greater than
ourselves--it was John Barleycorn. Many drinkers have said: "I
hadn't gone that far; I hadn't lost my job on account of drink; I
still had my family; I managed to keep out of jail. True, I took too
much sometimes and I guess I managed to make quite an a$$ of
myself when I did, but I still thought I could control my drinking. I
didn't really believe that I was an alcoholic." If I was one of these,
have I fully changed my mind?
Meditation For The Day
Painful as the present time may be; you will one day see the reason
for it. You will see that it was not only testing, but also a
preparation for the life-work which you are to do. Have faith that
your prayers and aspirations will someday be answered.
Answered in a way that perhaps seems painful to you but is the only
right way. Selfishness and pride often make us want things that
are not good for us. They need to be burned out of our natures.
We must be rid of the blocks which are holding us back, before we
can expect our prayers to be answered.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be willing to go through a time of testing. I pray that
I may trust God for the outcome.
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As Bill Sees It
To Survive Trials, p. 188
In our belief, any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes wholly to shield the
sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he
may succeed for a time, but he usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We
have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.
Release from alcohol, and not flight from it, is our answer.
<< << << >> >> >>
"Faith without works is dead." How appallingly true for the alcoholic! For if an alcoholic
fails to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he
cannot survive the certain trials and low spots ahead. If he does not work, he will surely
drink again, and if he drinks, he will surely die. Then faith will be dead indeed.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 101
2. pp. 14-15
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Walk In Dry Places
What should I have said or done?
Second thoughts
After an intense discussion, we might rehash what we said and wish we'd said something else. Perhaps some brilliant remark occurs to us long after the conversation has ended.
We can say only what comes to us at the time of the discussion. Our best preparation for any such discussion.... however important.... is to place the matter in God's hands, seeking the highest good for everyone involved.
It may be that the brilliant thoughts coming to us later would have actually been inappropriate. After all, important discussions also involve exchanges of strong feelings that influence the meeting. If our feelings are in line with the high principles of the program, the discussion should go well. In such cases, we will probably say what we're supposed to say.
I'll do my best today without trying to second-guess every word or action.
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Keep It Simple
Be brave enough to accept the help of others
Often is the past, we acted like we didn't need anyone. It takes courage to let others help us.
As we get better, our courage grows. We invite people into our lives. We help others, and we let others help us.
We will learn to let others help us if we work our program. Why? Because we need others to stay sober. When we have a problem, we talk about it in our group. When we need a shoulder to cry on, we call a friend or our sponsor. Over time, our relationships become one of the biggest rewards of recovery.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see my need for others as a test---a test to see if I’ll be brave enough and wise enough to ask for help when I need it.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list four times in my life when I needed help but didn't ask for it. I'll tell a friend about how these times would have been different if I had asked for help.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn’t work. You can easily see why.
p. 87
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
The second way in which, perhaps, I differ from some other alcoholic is this: Many alcoholics state that they don't particularly like the taste of alcohol but that they liked the effect. I loved alcohol! I used to like to get it on my fingers so I could lick them and get another taste. I had a lot of fun drinking. I enjoyed it immensely. And then, one ill-defined day, one day that I can't recall, I stepped across the line that alcoholics know so well, and from that day on, drinking was miserable. When a few drinks made me feel good before I went over that line, those same drinks made me wretched. In an attempt to get over that feeling, there was a quick onslaught of a greater number of drinks, and then all was lost. Alcohol failed to serve the purpose.
pp. 301-302
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Suppose that financial insecurity constantly arouses these same feelings. I can ask myself to what extent have my own mistakes fed my gnawing anxieties. And if the actions of others are part of the cause, what can I do about that? If I am unable to change the present state of affairs, am I willing to take the measures necessary to shape my life to conditions as they are? Questions like these, more of which will come to mind easily in each individual case, will help turn up the root causes.
pp. 52-53
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The way in which we think of ourselves has everything to do with how
our world sees us.
--Arlene Raven
Don't believe everything you think.
--unknown
"Put love first. Entertain thoughts that give life. And when a thought
or resentment, or hurt, or fear comes your way, have another thought
that is more powerful -- a thought that is love."
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Keep your face to the sunshine of His love and the shadows will fall
behind you."
--unknown
Take a walk with God. He will meet you at the Steps.
--unknown
It's easier to tear a hole than to mend one.
--Russian Proverb
Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RELIGION
"Doubt isn't the opposite of
faith; it is an element of faith."
--Paul Tillich
That part of me that does not know is vibrant in spirituality.
Problems are part of what it is to be human and an element of
doubt is essential. With the doubt comes the growth. However, as
a younger man I was told that it was a sin to doubt; God demanded a
steadfast faith and doubt could have no part of faith! I remember
going to confession and feeling guilty and ashamed about my doubts --
but I did doubt and doubt has always played a part in my life. In some
ways I think that my religious doubts have been the most creative part
of me -- certainly they have enabled me to grow and build a bridge of
understanding with others.
Master, hear, through the doubts, my love of You.
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Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret it only causes harm.
Psalm 37:7-8
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under
the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge
and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.
Psalm 81:1-2
Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up.
James 4:10
Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always
abounding in the work of the Lord, for as much as ye know that your
labor is not in vain in the Lord.
1 Corinthians 15:58
Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors.
Proverbs 8:34
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Daily Inspiration
Talking about how busy you are only adds stress to the stress you already feel. Lord, help me complete the tasks of my day and avoid taking on more than I can handle.
Rejoice and be happy for others when they are blessed. Lord, bless me with the ability to be free of envy so that I can truly share the joy of my neighbors.
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NA Just For Today
God In Each Other
"One aspect of our spiritual awakening comes through the new understanding of our Higher Power that we develop by sharing another addict's recovery."
Basic Text, p.51
We've heard it said that we often see God most clearly in one another. We see the truth of this when we practice our Twelfth Step. When we carry the recovery message to another addict, we sense the presence of a Power greater than ourselves. And as we watch the message take hold, we realize something else.
It's the message that brings recovery, not the messenger. A Higher Power, not our own power, is the source of the change that begins when we carry the message to a still-suffering addict. As the message does its work, transforming the life of another addict, we see a Higher Power in action. We watch as acceptance and hope replace denial and despair. Before our very eyes, the first traces of honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness begin to appear. Something's happening inside this person, something bigger and more powerful than either of us. We're watching the God we've come to understand at work in someone's life. We see the Higher Power in them. And we know with greater certainty than ever that this Higher Power is in us, too, as the force driving our recovery.
Just for today: As I carry the message of recovery to other addicts, I will try to pay attention to the Power behind the message. Today, as I watch other addicts recover, I will try to recognize the God in them so I can better recognize the God in myself.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I found words to every thought I ever had, but one. . . . --Emily Dickinson
What kinds of thoughts can't be put into words? We feel lost in space, mind-boggled by how small and big the stars are. We are sure and unsure about death, its blank and steady stare. Or we have done something that makes us feel both good and bad. Sometimes we hate someone we love, but we aren't sure what hate is, or love. We are scared of crowds and afraid of being abandoned, always alone. Sometimes we just want to laugh and cry, and when words fail we expect someone to know what our silences mean.
What are some ways I try to express my feelings without using words?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee! --Willard S. Krabill
We men have fallen into many difficulties because of poorly defined personal boundaries. Some of us never learned to say no to our mothers and felt invaded or ruled by them. Or we never truly said no to our fathers - never went through a teenage rebellion to establish ourselves as adults. Others have gotten stuck saying no and have never learned to yield and say yes.
Boundary problems have been part of the difficulty in many areas of our lives. We've told ourselves we have no right to our yes or no, or we've said we're strong enough to sacrifice for someone else, or we've welcomed the escape from ourselves in discarding our choice. Not saying no when we needed to or not saying yes when we wanted to has led many of us into doctors' offices, courts, jails, lost jobs, divorces, and bad marriages. Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.
I am learning to know myself by defining my boundaries and choosing when and when not to cross them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting It All Out
Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay to gripe and complain. We may tell ourselves that if we were really working a good program, we wouldn't need to complain.
What does that mean? We won't have feelings? We won't feel overwhelmed? We won't need to blow off steam or work through some not so pleasant, not so perfect, and not so pretty parts of life?
We can let ourselves get our feelings out, take risks, and be vulnerable with others. We don't have to be all put together, all the time. That sounds more like codependency than recovery.
Getting it all out doesn't mean we need to be victims. It doesn't mean we need to revel in our misery, finding status in our martyrdom. It doesn't mean we won't go on to set boundaries. It doesn't mean we won't take care of ourselves.
Sometimes, getting it all out is an essential part of taking care of ourselves. We reach a point of surrender so we can move forward.
Self-disclosure does not mean only quietly reporting our feelings. It means we occasionally take the risk to share our human side-the side with fears, sadness, hurt, rage, unreasonable anger, weariness, or lack of faith.
We can let our humanity show. In the process, we give others permission to be human too. "Together" people have their not so together moments. Sometimes, falling apart - getting it all out - is how we get put back together.
Today, I will let it all out if I need a release.
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Recognize the Signs
Sometimes, the universe gives us warnings.
I was driving down a local highway in New Mexico, a safe distance behind the car in front of me. Suddenly, the driver slammed on his brakes to avoid a huge puddle, a flood of water in front of him. I stopped short, but the car behind me was following too closely and rammed into the rear of my Jeep.
I got out and inspected the damage. My car was fine. The woman who rammed me had dented her bumper. No one was harmed. I got back in my Jeep, thinking it was over. But as I drove off, I began to wonder. Something about the incident still nagged at me.
Several weeks later, I was driving down a fast-moving two-lane highway. Behind me was a large truck loaded with cars. In front of me were several cars. In front of the cars was a school bus. The traffic was moving at at least fifty-five miles an hour.
Suddenly, I saw the brake lights from the cars ahead. The school bus had stopped to let a child disembark. I pulled to a stop behind the car in front of me. Then I remembered the lesson from the accident a couple of weeks ago: sometimes I can stop safely, but the driver behind me can’t.
I looked out my rearview mirror. The truck loaded with cars was frantically trying to stop. I pulled my car off the road onto the shoulder, giving him an extra car length. He screeched to a stop, right behind the car ahead of me. Had I not noticed, not pulled out, we’d all have been piled up. And the children in the bus…
Sometimes accidents happen without warning, but sometimes the universe gives us a nudge, a little sign. We don’t have to become paranoid, we don’t have to think every event means something, but we can trust ourselves to recognize a sign when we see one.
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More Language Of Letting Go
It will get better
Sometimes things need to feel worse before they get better. Feelings are one of those things.
When a feeling comes to the surface, it presents itself boldly. Usually the feelings being stirred up are ones we label unpleasant– fear, hurt, rage, guilt, shame or deep sorrow and grief. They will feel intense, for a while. Some feelings take a moment to come to the surface and clear. Other feelings take more time.
Feeling the emotion that intensely means it’s finally clearing out of your system. Even though it may feel like it, it’s not really getting worse. It’s healing, it’s getting better. You’re cleaning out that old wound. To do that, you have to reopen it, but just for a little while. But finally, after you do that, it will truly heal.
What do you need to do with feelings? Acknowledge them. Feel them. Give each one its due. They like to be honored that way. Once you identify and feel them, then they’ll go away. And each time you do this, the pond becomes clearer and cleaner, until finally the water is pure.
Notice how you react to yourself when a feeling comes up that needs attention and care. Do you spend as much time resisting the feeling as you actually do feeling the emotion? Do you expend more energy than necessary worrying that the feeling won’t leave, that you won’t be able to handle it, or that the feeling will take over your life? Consciously and deliberately relinquish your resistance to your emotional world. In March we learned to say whatever as part of speaking the language of letting go. Now practice saying whatever in love to your feelings.
God, give me the courage to face what I feel now, and what I felt before and didn’t have the resources to feel. Help me trust that this process will help me feel better than I did before.
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Food for Thought
Life Is Opportunity
Each morning when we wake up, we thank our Higher Power for another day of abstaining. Each hour that is given to us is a chance to grow and learn and serve. We can believe that God has a plan for every day that he gives us and that He will reveal the plan step by step as we listen for His guidance.
If we are too intent on carrying out our personal ideas and projects, we may miss the directions that come from God. We need to remain open and flexible so that He may use us as He chooses.
Considering the time and tasks that we have as opportunities to serve saves us from self-centered worry and anxiety. We do not have to be compulsive about our work and activities. God knows our capabilities and will not give us more than we can handle. He is always ready to direct our efforts when we turn to Him.
Thank You for the opportunity to live and serve today.
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A Self-Created State
Worry
Worry is an extension of fear and can also set you up for attracting that which you don’t want in your life.
We have all had the experience of worrying about something at some point in our lives. Some of us have a habitual tendency to worry, and all of us have known someone who is a chronic worrier. Worry is an extension of fear and can be a very draining experience. In order for worry to exist, we have to imagine that something bad might happen. What we are worrying about has not happened yet, however, so this bad thing is by definition a fantasy. Understood this way, worry is a self-created state of needless fear. Still, most of us worry.
One reason we worry is because we feel like we’re not in control. For example, you might worry about your loved ones driving home in bad weather. There is nothing you can do to guarantee their safe passage, but you worry until you find out they have reached their destination unharmed. In this instance, worry is an attempt to feel useful and in control. However, worrying does nothing to ensure a positive outcome and it has an unpleasant effect on your body, mind, and spirit. The good news is that there are ways to transform this kind of worry so that it has a healing effect. Just as worry uses the imagination, so does the antidote to worry. Next time you find that you are worrying, imagine the best result instead of anticipating the worst outcome. Visualize your loved ones’ path bathed in white light and clearly see in your mind’s eye their safe arrival. Imagine angels or guides watching over them as they make their way home. Generate peace and well-being instead of nervousness and unease within yourself.
Another reason we worry is that something that we know is pending but are avoiding is nagging us—an unpaid parking ticket, an upcoming test, an issue with a friend. In these cases, acknowledging that we are worried and taking action is the best solution. If you can confront the situation and own your power to change it, you’ll have no reason to worry. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
What wonderful things could happen in my life if I could get rid of my natural impulse to justify my actions. Is honesty so deeply repr4essed under layers of guilt that I can’t release it to understand my motives? Being honest with ourselves isn’t easy. It’s difficult to search out why I had this or that impulse and, more importantly, why I acted upon it. Nothing makes us feel so vulnerable as to give up the crutch of The Alibi, yet my willingness to be vulnerable will go a long way toward helping me grow in The Program. Am I becoming more aware that self-deception multiplies my problems?
Today I Pray
May God remove my urge to make excuses. Help me to face up to the realities that surface when I am honest with myself. Help me to know, as certainly as day follows sunrise, that my difficulties will be lessened if I can only trust His Will.
Today I Will Remember
I will be willing to do His Will.
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One More Day
Smiles form the channels of a future tear.
– Lord Byron
We have often watched smiles turn to laughter and laughter back to tears. At a family reunion, we hear the joyous sounds of people chattering away, trying to catch up in five minutes for twenty lost years.
People who have Parkinson’s disease sometimes complain that their faces don’t match the emotions they want to express. The mask of the illness slows down normal movement of facial muscles. Even more tragic is the person who doesn’t feel emotion. No laughter and no tears.
We are fortunate to be able to express our emotions, to show contentment and unhappiness. So what if today’s laughter becomes tomorrow’s tears? We know we’ll laugh again — and cry again. Our past experiences give meaning to the present.
I will accept all my emotions as an affirmation of my life. Changing emotions are a part of normal living.
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One Day At A Time
FEAR
“Few persons live up to the faith which they really have.
Unreasoned fear is a master intellectual fraud
practiced upon the evolving mortal soul.”
The Urantia Book
“Unreasoned fear” was my main problem for most of my life. I lived with a myriad of fears which seemed to be too awesome and terrible to face. I love the fact that since finding this recovery program, I no longer have to live in fear. What wondrous freedom I found in the realization that unreasoned fear is “intellectual fraud!”
One slogan I recall about fear says: “Future Events Appear Real.” That is the first one that really helped me to realize that most of my fears were not based on what was real. By working the Steps of this program I have managed to stop attempting to live in a future filled with fear. When I focus on just being here now -- living in this moment only -- I don't have to run from fear.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will stay in this moment. I will look at the people and things that are here right now and enjoy what my Higher Power has given me.
~ Steph
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When you have carefully explained to such people that he is a sick person, you will have created a new atmosphere. Barriers which have sprung up between you and your friends will disappear with the growth of sympathetic understanding. You will no longer be self-conscious or feel that you must apologize as though your husband were a weak character. He may be anything but that. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially. - Pg. 115 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is necessary in the beginning to be clean from dry drugs and dry from wet drugs, but it is not all we want to obtain. We want wholeness and we want growth. This comes from living each hour according to the principles we are learning.
My Spiritual Source demonstrates that clean and dry is not my only goal--but growth is.
Dreaming Dreams
Today, I will dream dreams. There is nothing wrong with having a couple of dreams for myself if they are realistic and don't remove me from life too much. To work toward a dream can be a constructive use of my talents and energies. It can give me a positive focus. If my dreams are wild and I am not willing to do the work necessary to realize them, they will only frustrate me and lower my self-esteem. If, however, I am able to dream what makes sense for me and work to put it within my reach, it can be a real process of growth and challenge. My energy and enthusiasm can help me move through blocks, and my commitment can show me that love and effort can be their own reward.
I can stretch myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Deal with the small stuff or it will deal with you. Do not allow the small stuff to pile up on the camel's back. Take each situation that bothers you and deal with that as one unit, not as the straw that breaks the camel's back.
When I feel it, I deal with it and then can heal from it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Do your Third Step every morning and turn your will over to the care of the God of your understanding. At night, take a Tenth Step to see how God's doing.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
A man was walking on a beach after a storm. Thousands of starfish were stranded on the shore. He saw a boy throwing starfish back into the ocean and asked the boy why. The boy replied: 'The tide's going out, the starfish will die in the sun. The man said; 'But there's so many of them, what difference can it make? The boy threw another starfish and said : It'll make a difference to that one.' Anon.
bluidkiti
07-07-2015, 08:01 AM
July 8
Daily Reflections
AN EVER-GROWING FREEDOM, p.198
The Seventh Step is where we make the change in our attitude
which permits us, with humility as our guide, to move out from
ourselves toward others and toward God.
12 & 12, p.76
When I finally asked God to remove those things blocking me
from Him and the sunlight of the Spirit, I embarked on a journey
more glorious than I ever imagined. I experienced freedom from
those characteristics that had me wrapped up in myself. Because
of this humbling Step, I feel clean. I am especially aware of this
Step because I'm now able to be useful to God and to my fellows. I
know that He has granted me strength to do His bidding and has
prepared me for anyone, and anything, that comes my way today. I
am truly in His hands, and I give thanks for the joy that I can be useful
today.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We in Alcoholics Anonymous do not enter into theological
discussions, but in carrying our message we attempt to explain the
simple "how" of the spiritual life. How faith in a Higher Power can
help you to overcome loneliness, fear, and anxiety. How it can
help you get along with other people. How it can make it possible
for you to rise above pain, sorrow, and despondency. How it can
help you to overcome your desires for the things that destroy. Have
I reached a simple, effective faith?
Meditation For The Day
Expect miracles of change in people's lives. Do not be held back
by unbelief. People can be changed and they are often ready and
waiting to be changed. Never believe that human nature cannot be
changed. We see changed people everyday. Do you have the faith to
make those changes possible? Modern miracles happen every day
in the lives of people. All miracles are in the realm of personalities.
Human nature can be changed and is always being changed. But we must
have enough faith so that we can be channels for God's strength into
the lives of others.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have the faith to expect miracles. I pray that I
may be used by God to help change the lives of others.
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As Bill Sees It
Experimenters, p. 189
We agnostics liked A.A. all right, and were quick to say that it had done miracles. But we
recoiled from meditation and prayer as obstinately as the scientist who refused to
perform a certain experiment lest it prove his pet theory wrong.
When we finally did experiment, and unexpected results followed, we felt different; in
fact, we knew different; and so we were sold on meditation and prayer. And that, we
found, can happen to anybody who tries. It has been well said that "Almost the only
scoffers at prayer are those who never tried enough."
12 & 12, p. 97
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Walk In Dry Places
God’s will for us.
Spiritual Guidance.
"I was afraid God would want me to do something unpleasant, like go off to become a monk," a young man said at a 12 Step meeting. "That’s why I had a hard time seeking God’s will for me." This sort of comment is heard now and then at meetings. It reveals a belief that God is a harsh taskmaster who delights in imposing difficult conditions on us.
The truth is that God’s purpose is to help us be more of what we ought to be, which is always something better than what we’re experiencing now. Few people are ever called to be monks, but those who do are pleased with their choice and devote themselves to it.
We must always be interested in finding God’s direction in our lives. It will turn out to be something far better than anything we could have planned.
I need not fear God’s direction in my life. It’s actually what I need in order to reach my true place.
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Keep It Simple
Pain can't be avoided. It's as natural as joy. - Unknown
We got into a lot of trouble trying to avoid pain. We used alcohol and other drugs to avoid pain. We didn't want to accept pain as a fact of life.
We can't avoid pain, but now we have the program. The program teaches us how to talk about our pain. The program teaches how to turn over our pain to our Higher Power.
We don't have to be alone when we face pain. We have friends to go to. Before, when we hurt, we ran to alcohol or other drugs.
Now, when we hurt, we run to the comfort of our sponsor and our program friends.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me accept pain as part of life. Help me remember that You are always there to help me with my pain. I'm not alone.
Today's Action: Today, I'll list three painful events in my life. I'll talk with a friend about them.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Women like to sit down with trouble as if it were knitting. --Ellen Glasgow
How often we turn minor challenges into monumental barriers by giving them undue attention, forgetting that within any problem lies its solution! However, the center of our focus must be off the problem's tangle if we are to find the solution's thread. The best remedy for this dilemma is the Serenity Prayer.
We cannot change our children, our husbands or partners, not even the best friends who we know love us. But with God's help we can change the attitude that has us blocked at this time. A changed attitude, easing up on ourselves, lessening our expectations of others, will open the door to the kind of relationships we seek, the smooth flowing days we long for.
We need not take life so seriously. In fact, we shouldn't take it so seriously. We can measure our emotional health by how heartily we laugh with others and at ourselves. The 24 hours stretching before us at this time promises many choices in attitude. We can worry, be mad, depressed, or frustrated, or we can trust our higher power to see us through whatever the situation. So, we can relax. It is our decision, the one decision over which we are not powerless.
I will be in control of my attitude today. I can have the kind of day I long for.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
If circumstances warrant, we ask our wives or friends to join us in morning meditation. If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also. If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the principles we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. Suggestions about these may be obtained from one’s priest, minister, or rabbi. Be quick to see where religious people are right. Make use of what they offer.
p. 87
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
One the last day I was drinking, I went up to see a friend who had had a good deal of trouble with alcohol and whose wife had left him a number of times. He had come back, however, and he was on this program. In my stupid way I went to see him with the idea in the back of my mind that I would investigate Alcoholics Anonymous from a medical standpoint. Deep in my heart was the feeling that maybe I could get some help here. This friend gave me a pamphlet, and I took it home and had my wife read it to me. There were two sentences in it that struck me. One said, "Don't feel that you are a martyr because you stopped drinking, and this hit me between the eyes. The second one said, "Don't feel that you stop drinking for anyone other than yourself," and this hit me between the eyes. After my wife had read this to me, I said to her, as I had said many times in desperation, "I have got to do something." She is a good-natured, soul and said, "I wouldn't worry about it; probably something will happen." And then we went up the side of a hill where we have a little barbecue area to make the fire for the barbecue, and on the way up I thought to myself---I'll go back down to the kitchen and refill this drink. And just then, something did happen.
pp. 302-303
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
But it is from our twisted relations with family, friends, and society at large that many of us have suffered the most. We have been especially stupid and stubborn about them. The primary fact that we fail to recognize is our total inability to form a true partnership with another human being. Our egomania digs two disastrous pitfalls. Either we insist upon dominating the people we know, or we depend upon them far too much. If we lean too heavily on people, they will sooner or later fail us, for they are human, too, and cannot possibly meet our incessant demands. In this way our insecurity grows and festers. When we habitually try to manipulate others to our own willful desires, they revolt, and resist us heavily. Then we develop hurt feelings, a sense of persecution, and a desire to retaliate. As we redouble our efforts at control, and continue to fail, our suffering becomes acute and constant. We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society. Always we tried to struggle to the top of the heap, or to hide underneath it. This self-centered behavior blocked a partnership relation with any one of those about us. Of true brotherhood we had small comprehension.
p. 53
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All time spent angry is time lost being happy.
--Mexican Proverb
Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have, and where you
are.
--Anonymous
Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you
can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people
you can, as long as ever you can.
--John Wesley
Most of us are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
--Abraham Lincoln
"One's destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at
things."
--Henry Miller
Superfluous wealth can buy superfluities only. Money is not required
to buy one necessity of the soul.
--Henry David Thoreau
"No one has ever done anything too bad to be forgiven."
--Ruth Sheppard
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ART
"There is no must in art because
it is free."
--Vasily Kandinsky
Now I understand why the religious people of the past persecuted
the artist. Now I understand why so many artists moved away
from religion and grew beyond it. The artist is always searching
for that which is different, that which cannot be contained or
codified; that which is free: Spirituality. As a drinking alcoholic I
found it necessary to control my life; control my thoughts and
behavior; control each and every situation -- and it was depressingly
exhausting. Today sobriety enables me to risk that which is new and
different. Sobriety allows me to experiment and take risks in God's
world. Sobriety is being free. I am discovering more of me in what
yesterday's artists wrote and produced. The "musts" of yesterday
have been replaced by the shoulds and needs today. I am free to
listen and consider the person because he is a person and not
simply because of his credentials.
Supreme Artist, let me hear You in the whisperings of Your creatures.
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Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety upon Him, because He cares for you.
1 Peter 5:6-7
You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus.
Galatians 3:26
You are from God, little children, and have overcome; because
greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.
1 John 4:4
"Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one
comes to the Father except through me. If you really knew me, you
would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and
have seen him."
John 14:5-7
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Daily Inspiration
Keep your mind open to the possibility that things can turn out even better than expected. Lord, I trust in You and graciously accept all blessings that You send to me.
God gives us power, love and self-discipline, not fear and timidness. Lord, I will not be afraid to proclaim that You are my God. All will see it in my actions.
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NA Just For Today
The "G" Word
"It is important for you to know that you will hear God mentioned at NA meetings. What we are referring to is a Power greater than ourselves that makes possible what seems impossible."
IP No.22, "Welcome to NA"
Most of us come to Narcotics Anonymous with a variety of preconceptions about what the word "God" means, many of them negative. Yet the "G" word is used very regularly in NA, if not constantly. It occurs 92 times in the first 103 pages of our Basic Text, and appears prominently in a third of our Twelve Steps. Rather than sidestep the sensitivity many of us feel toward the word, let's address it head on.
It's true that Narcotics Anonymous is a spiritual program. Our Twelve Steps offer a way to find freedom from addiction through the help of a spiritual Power greater than we are. The program, however; doesn't tell us anything about what we have to think about that Power. In fact, over and over again, in our literature and our steps and our meetings, we hear it said, "the God of our understanding" - whatever that understanding may be.
We use the word "God" because it's used in our Basic Text and because it communicates most effectively to most people a basic understanding of the Power underlying our recovery. The word, we use for the sake of convenience. The Power behind the word, however, we use for more than convenience. We use that Power to maintain our freedom from addiction and to ensure our ongoing recovery.
Just for today: Whether I believe in "God" or not, I will use the Power that keeps me clean and free.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I found words to every thought I ever had, but one. . . . --Emily Dickinson
What kinds of thoughts can't be put into words? We feel lost in space, mind-boggled by how small and big the stars are. We are sure and unsure about death, its blank and steady stare. Or we have done something that makes us feel both good and bad. Sometimes we hate someone we love, but we aren't sure what hate is, or love. We are scared of crowds and afraid of being abandoned, always alone. Sometimes we just want to laugh and cry, and when words fail we expect someone to know what our silences mean.
What are some ways I try to express my feelings without using words?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee! --Willard S. Krabill
We men have fallen into many difficulties because of poorly defined personal boundaries. Some of us never learned to say no to our mothers and felt invaded or ruled by them. Or we never truly said no to our fathers - never went through a teenage rebellion to establish ourselves as adults. Others have gotten stuck saying no and have never learned to yield and say yes.
Boundary problems have been part of the difficulty in many areas of our lives. We've told ourselves we have no right to our yes or no, or we've said we're strong enough to sacrifice for someone else, or we've welcomed the escape from ourselves in discarding our choice. Not saying no when we needed to or not saying yes when we wanted to has led many of us into doctors' offices, courts, jails, lost jobs, divorces, and bad marriages. Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.
I am learning to know myself by defining my boundaries and choosing when and when not to cross them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. --Doris Lessing
As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.
To understand something more deeply requires that we be open to the ideas of others, willing to part with our present opinions. The program offers us many opportunities to trade in the understandings we've outgrown. Throughout our recovery we have discovered new interpretations of old ideas. And we will continue to expand our understanding.
Every situation, every person, every feeling, every idea has a slightly different hue each time we encounter it. The wonder of this is that life is forever enriched, forever fresh.
Each moment offers me a chance to know better who I am and to understand more fully the real contribution that is mine to make in this life. I will let the anticipation of my changing ideas excite me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting It All Out
Let yourself have a good gripe session. From: " Woman, Sex, and Addiction" -- Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
Get it out. Go ahead. Get it all out. Once we begin recovery, we may feel like it's not okay to gripe and complain. We may tell ourselves that if we were really working a good program, we wouldn't need to complain.
What does that mean? We won't have feelings? We won't feel overwhelmed? We won't need to blow off steam or work through some not so pleasant, not so perfect, and not so pretty parts of life?
We can let ourselves get our feelings out, take risks, and be vulnerable with others. We don't have to be all put together, all the time. That sounds more like codependency than recovery.
Getting it all out doesn't mean we need to be victims. It doesn't mean we need to revel in our misery, finding status in our martyrdom. It doesn't mean we won't go on to set boundaries. It doesn't mean we won't take care of ourselves.
Sometimes, getting it all out is an essential part of taking care of ourselves. We reach a point of surrender so we can move forward.
Self-disclosure does not mean only quietly reporting our feelings. It means we occasionally take the risk to share our human side-the side with fears, sadness, hurt, rage, unreasonable anger, weariness, or lack of faith.
We can let our humanity show. In the process, we give others permission to be human too. "Together" people have their not so together moments. Sometimes, falling apart - getting it all out - is how we get put back together.
Today, I will let it all out if I need a release.
Today I let go totally and give God the space to do His work. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Sometimes the Road Gets Rough
Don’t be dismayed when you come to a pothole, a detour, a stretch of rough and rocky road. Don’t be surprised. Slow down a little. Be patient. It’s not the whole journey. It’s not the way it’ll always be. But it is part of your journey,too, part of your journey to your heart and soul. Even when we’re living with joy and freedom, we continue to learn, grow, feel, experience. And the road can still get rough.
Happiness doesn’t mean feeling gleeful all the time. Happiness doesn’t mean the road we’re traveling is always smooth. Happiness means feeling all we need to feel. And accepting each part of the journey, even the changes of course and direction.
Feel all your feelings. Feel your fear and frustration about slowing down, then settle in for the ride. You may not be going as fast as you’d like, but the journey hasn’t stopped. You’re not doing anything wrong. You are going slower, but you’re still moving forward.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Dump it
Sometimes, we don’t have one clear feeling to express. We have a bunch of garbage we’ve collected, and we just need to dump.
We may be frustrated, angry, afraid, and sick to death of something– all in one ugly bunch. We could be enraged, hurt, overwhelmed, and feeling somewhat controlling and vengeful,too. Our emotional stuff has piled up to an unmanageable degree.
We can go to our journal and write this whole mess of feelings out, as ugly as it looks and as awkward and ungrateful as it feels to put it into words. We can call up a friend, someone we trust, and just spill all this out over the phone. Or we can stomp around our living room in the privacy of our own home and just dump all this stuff out into the air. We can go for a drive in our car, roll the window down, and dump everything out as we drive through the wilderness.
The important idea here is to dump our stuff when it piles up.
You don’t always have to be that healthy and in control of what you feel. Sometimes, dumping all your stuff is the way to clean things out.
God, help me understand that sometimes the only thing preventing me from moving forward in my life is hanging on to all the stuff that I really need to dump.
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Food for Thought
Stronger or Weaker?
Every time I say no to the craving for just one small, extra bite, I become stronger. Every time I give in, I weaken myself and make it harder to say no the next time.
Abstinence from compulsive overeating is made up of many small decisions. We gradually acquire the knowledge of what we can handle and what we should avoid. This knowledge applies to situations and attitudes as well as food. As we work our program and make the right decisions, we gain strength.
Since none of us is perfect, we do not need to become discouraged when we make mistakes. We are learning how to live, and our failures teach us more than our successes. Growth is slow, but if we keep coming back to OA and the program, we will see results beyond our wildest expectations. OA gives us the strength to become new people.
For growing stronger, we thank You.
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Do unto Others
The Golden Rule by Madisyn Taylor
When we honor others by following the golden rule, we honor ourselves too.
All over the world, there exists a simple precept that, when followed, has the power to end conflict and banish strife. It is the Golden Rule, a key concept in many philosophies and spiritualities that admonishes us to “do unto others as we would have them do unto us.” Its meaning is clear: treat others only in ways that you would want to be treated. However, the golden rule is not always easy to follow. It can be a challenge to honor others as we wish to be honored. Yet, when we do so, we bestow a gift of loving kindness on our fellow human beings. And, in honoring others, we honor ourselves.
It is as uncomplicated a tenet as one could wish for. When we live by it, harming another person becomes nearly impossible. The Golden Rule is rooted in pure empathy and does not compel us to perform any specific act. Rather, it gently guides us to never let our actions toward others be out of harmony with our own desires. The Golden Rule asks us to be aware of the effect our words and actions may have on another person and to imagine ourselves in their place. It calls on us to ask ourselves how we would feel if what we were about to do were directed toward us. And yet this rule invites us to do more than not harm others. It suggests that we look for opportunities to behave toward others in the same ways that we would want others to act toward us. Showing compassion, being considerate of others, caring for the less fortunate, and giving generously are what can result when you follow the Golden Rule.
Adhering to the Golden Rule whenever possible can have a positive effect on the world around you because kindness begets kindness. In doing so, you generate a flow of positive energy that enfolds everyone you encounter in peace, goodwill, and harmony. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
When we speak with a friend in The Program, we shouldn’t hesitate to remind him or her of our need for privacy. Intimate communication is normally so free and easy among us that even a friend or sponsor may sometimes forget when we expect him to remain silent. Such “privileged communications” have important advantages. For one thing, we find in them the perfect opportunity to be as honest as we know how to be. For another, we don’t have to worry about the possibility of injury to other people, nor the fear of ridicule or condemnation. At the same time, we have the best possible chance to spot self-deception. Am I trustworthy to those who trust me.
Today I Pray
I pray for God’s assistance in making me a trusted confidant. I need to be a person others will be willing to share with. I need to be an open receiver, not just a transmitter. Today I pray for a large portion of tried-and-sureness, so that I may be a better and more receptive friend to those who choose to confide in me.
Today I Will Remember
Be a receiver.
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One More Day
They do me wrong who say I come no more, / Fear every day I stand outside your door.
– Walter Malone
Opportunity doesn’t just knock once, it’s there all the time. Perhaps we just don’t see it because we’re frightened to try new things. Or we may be complacent. One of the ways we know we are really making capable, mature decisions is when we become willing to open the door to opportunity again.
Occasionally, when a person retires, he or she may expect life to become automatically wonderful — all the time in the world and nothing in particular to do. It may take a little time for us to adjust. Opportunity is always there, waiting. We can learn to open our own doors.
I can renew my energies by becoming eager to burst forward, to pursue leisure-time efforts, to work with others.
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One Day At A Time
~ ACTION ~
"He does not believe who does not live his belief." Thomas Fuller
It's an old axiom that actions speak louder than words. Our Twelve Step program is one of action, no matter how much we want to avoid working the Steps. The Big Book states that IF you want what we have, you will do what we did. That also means the opposite ... if you don't want what we have, don't do it. The insanity of this disease is expecting a different result by continually doing the same old thing. Sanity is giving up what didn't work and daring to try something new.
One day at a time ...
I am going to trust that obedience to the program will, in time, restore me to sanity.
~ Jeremiah ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
3. - Our membership ought to include all who suffer from alcoholism. Hence we may refuse none who wish to recover. Nor ought A.A. membership ever depend upon money or conformity. Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation. - Pg. 563 - 4th. Edition - The Twelve Traditions ( The Long Form )
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The slogans may sometimes annoy us in their simplicity. But repetition is an important learning tool. Think of the repetition that alcohol, cocaine, marijuana and depressants bring. Now you can understand the necessity of slogans to counteract the repetition of addiction.
As I go into this next hour of a clean and sober day, may I welcome the repetitions of recovery.
Having Fun
Today, I will have fun. What's the point of all the work I do in recovery if my life doesn't become lighter and happier? Even though I am working through deep issues, there is no reason why I can't have some enjoyment in the process. Fun is when I relax and let things happen - when I can laugh at myself and other people - when I don't take everything in life so seriously. It is when I can enjoy a seemingly meaningless conversation just for its own sake. Fun is when it doesn't have to be all my way - when the heavy load is removed, when my meter is turned off and I just goof around in the moment. Fun is something I don't have enough of for a number of silly reasons. Today I see that there is no reason not to enjoy myself.
I can let go and have fun.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
It doesn't pay to argue with 'slippers' about the proper way of getting clean and sober. Why should people who are still drinking and drugging tell those who are sober why it can't be done! We learn not to get in a pissing contest with a skunk. (or should we say drunk!)
The only thing I need to tell a drunk is how I got sober. I can't tell him or her how they will get sober, because I don't know.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Remember what you have left, not what you have lost.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm looking within to discover what I am holding on to from the past. Today I am willing to let go of all old anger and resentments that keep me stuck in tension and pain.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
To an alcoholic, changing drinks is like changing cabins on the Titanic. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
07-08-2015, 07:54 AM
July 9
Daily Reflections
I AM AN INSTRUMENT
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
12 & 12, p.70
The subject of humility is a difficult one. Humility is not thinking
less of myself than I ought to; it is acknowledging that I do certain
things well, it is accepting a compliment graciously. God can only do
for me what He can do through me. Humility is the result of knowing
that God is the doer, not me. In the light of awareness, how can I take
pride in my accomplishments? I am an instrument and any work I
seem to be doing is being done by God through me. I ask God on a
daily basis to remove my shortcomings, in order that I may more freely
go about my A.A. business of "love and service."
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Disillusionment and spiritual confusion mark our age. Many of us
have cast aside old ideas without acquiring new ones. Many men
and women are creeping through life on their hands and knees,
merely because they refuse to rely on any power but themselves.
Many of them feel that they are being brave and independent, but
actually they are only courting disaster. Anxiety and the inferiority
complex have become the greatest of all modern plagues. In A.A.
we have the answer to these ills. Have I ceased to rely on myself
only?
Meditation For The Day
Disillusionment and doubt spoil life. The doubting ones are the
disillusioned ones. When you are in doubt, you are on the fence.
You are not going anywhere. Doubt poisons all action. "Well. I
don't know"--so you don't know anything. You should meet life
with a "Yes," an affirmative attitude. There is good in the world
and we can follow that good. There is power available to help us to
do the right thing; therefore we will accept that power. There are
miracles of change in people's lives; therefore we will accept
those miracles as evidence of God's power.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I will not be paralyzed by doubt. I pray that I may go along
on the venture of faith.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
The A.A. Way in the Home*, p. 190
Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his
family. You should continue to be friendly to them, explaining A.A.'s concept of
alcoholism and its treatment. If they accept this and also apply our principles to their
problems, there is a much better chance that the head of the family will recover. And
even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable.
********************************
Unless a new member's family readily expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles,
we think he ought not to urge them. They will change in time. His behavior will usually
convince them far more than his words.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 97
2. p. 83
*Today, the initiation of the A.A. way of life in the home is the central purpose of the Al-Anon
Family Groups of which there are (as of 1984) over 22,000 throughout the world. These are
composed of wives, husbands, and relatives of alcoholics. In restoring families to the good life,
Alan's success has been enormous.
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
What is the real cause?
Motivations.
Bringing her alcoholic husband home from a treatment center, a woman was dismayed when an argument ensued and he left the car in a rage. She blamed herself and their argument when he finally arrived home, DRUNK.
Seasoned veterans of alcoholic games will quickly understand that the argument had no part in “causing” the alcoholic to drink. Instead, the argument was something he started as a means of getting away from his wife. He still wanted and needed to drink.
In dealing with our compulsive illnesses, we must separate our excuses from what’s really going on. Arguments do not cause alcoholics to drink, but they can be used as convenient devices for getting our way.
I must take responsibility for my own behavior. If I have chosen sobriety, no person and no event can cause me to drink.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
First say to yourself what you would be: and then do what you have to do. - Eptctetus
We often tell ourselves we want to be more peaceful, more in touch with our Higher Power. In other words, we want to become more spiritual. Acting as spiritual people is hard. Tho often, we choose the easy way. We make a nasty comment even if we know it'll only make things worse.
We say we have a program for living. Are we living our program? We'll find the answer in our behavior. Sober people act in sober ways. We attend meetings regularly. We study spiritual ideas. We work to bring joy to our lives and the lives of others. Just as we know a good friend by the way he or she behaves, we know a sober person by the way he or she behaves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be a person whose words and actions match up.
Today's Action: Today I'll take an inventory of my actions to see if they are those of a sober person.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 6 - INTO ACTION
As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer
running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.
It works--it really does.
We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined.
But this is not all. There is action and more action. “Faith without works is dead.” The next chapter is entirely devoted to Step Twelve.
pp. 87-88
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
The thought came to me---This is the last one! I was well into the second fifth by this time. And as that thought came to me, it was as though someone had reached down and taken a heavy overcoat off my shoulders, for that was the last one.
p. 303
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Some will object to many of the questions posed, because they think their own character defects have not been so glaring. To these it can be suggested that a conscientious examination is likely to reveal the very defects the objectionable questions are concerned with. Because our surface record hasn't looked too bad, we have frequently been abashed to find that this is so simply because we have buried these self same defects deep down in us under thick layers of self-justification. Whatever the defects, they have finally ambushed us into alcoholism and misery.
pp. 53-54
************************************************** *********
During the time of the darkest night, act as if the morning has already
come.
--The Talmud
The spiritual journey involves going beyond hope and fear, stepping
into unknown territory, continually moving forward. The most
important aspect of being on the spiritual path may be just to keep
moving.
--Pema Chodron
God is my life, I express health, God is my supply, I express
abundance, God is trust, I express faith.
--SweetyZee
No one gives me worry, nothing causes me fear, I release them, and
trust Gods outcomes.
--SweetyZee
I am steadfast in my loyalty to God and truth.
--SweetyZee
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PESSIMISM
"There is no sadder sight than a
young pessimist."
--Mark Twain
I meet so many young people who have "aged" because of their
drug addiction. They have lost that "spark" of youth that is both
creative and hopeful. They reveal in their eyes a "powerlessness"
that keeps them prisoners of lethargy. They don't want to do
anything. They mumble rather than speak. They walk with no
purpose: young zombies! Addiction breeds pessimism.
Recovery is realizing that life need not be like this. True joy and
happiness comes with the experience of self, rather than the
confused experiences of chemicals. Reality is facing the pain and
problems in order to rediscover the dynamic spirituality of a
drug-free life. The "yes" to life begins with the "no" to drugs.
Happiness and confidence are discovered in the "yes" to life.
Let me see beyond the gloom to the promised sunrise of tomorrow.
************************************************** *********
"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:13
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and
effective."
James 5:16
"Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the
name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will
receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."
Acts 2:38
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our
sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I John 1:9
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
We often don't realize how heavy the weight of worry is and how much energy it requires until we are able to let go of it. Lord, I place my trust in You to clear my thinking, help me resolve my concerns and bring me to a place of peace.
Keep yourself young in spirit always by thinking new thoughts and getting rid of old habits. Lord, may my spirit never become frail and my abilities never become barren.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
We Do Recover!
"....the time has come when that tired old lie, 'Once an addict, always an addict,' will no longer be tolerated by either society or the addict himself. We do recover."
Basic Text, p.86
From time to time, we hear speakers share that they don't really understand spiritual principles yet. They tell us that if we knew what went on in their minds, we'd be amazed at how insane they still are. They tell us that the longer they're clean, the less they know about anything. In the next breath, these same speakers tell us about the profound changes recovery has made in their lives. They have moved from complete despair to unfailing hope, from uncontrollable drug use to total abstinence, from chronic unmanageability to responsibility through working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous. Which story is true? Do we or don't we recover?
We may think we demonstrate humility or gratitude by underplaying the change that recovery has brought to our lives. True, we do injustice to the program when we take credit for this miracle ourselves. But we do an equal injustice-to ourselves and to those we share with-when we don't acknowledge this miracle's magnitude.
We do recover. If we have trouble seeing the miracle of recovery, we'd better look again. Recovery is alive and at work in Narcotics Anonymous-in our old-timers, in the newcomers flooding our meetings, and most of all in ourselves. All we have to do is open our eyes.
Just for today: I will acknowledge the miracle of my recovery and be grateful that I've found it.
pg. 199
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. --Dorothy Canfield Fisher
A strong, healthy tree is one which is free to grow straight and tall. A weak tree often must lean against another for support. It is not that different with people. We are not healthy and strong when we must always lean on another to support us.
This doesn't mean it isn't healthy to accept help. But the best help we can get or give is that which enables us to do things without it. Sometimes we think we lose a relationship when others don't need our help, or when we don't need theirs all the time. The reverse is true. Only when we are each strong enough to stand on our own can we really share the kind of help, which allows both, helped and helper to be independent.
Have I been giving the right kind of help?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. --Herbert Spencer
We sometimes wish we could protect friends or loved ones from the consequences of their actions. We'd like to pick up the pieces after they've made a mess of their lives. Or we fail to look at the dark side of someone's motives because we want only the best. Perhaps it is our controlling willfulness that tries to make things into what we want, rather than accepts things as they really are.
In our masculine recovery, a deeper love allows us to have a respectful distance from others. When we truly care about someone, we don't snatch him or her out of his or her learning experience. When we allow our loved ones and friends to confront the natural consequences of their own actions, they learn and grow just as we do. We can be with a friend, but we are no one's Higher Power.
Today, I will be respectful of others by letting them walk their path while I walk mine.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Overspending and Underspending
I used to beat my husband to death with my credit card. It makes me feel like I had some control, some way to get even with him. --Anonymous
I spent ten years buying everything for myself at garage sales. I didn't even buy myself a new pair of shoes. The entire time I was depriving myself, my husband was gambling, speculating on risky business deals, and doing whatever he wanted with money. I learned that when I made a decision that I deserved to have the things I wanted, and made a decision to buy something I wanted, there was enough money to do it. It wasn't about being frugal; it was about depriving myself, and being a martyr. --Anonymous
Compulsive buying or overspending may give us a temporary feeling of power or satisfaction, but like other out of control behaviors, it has predictable negative consequences.
Under spending can leave us feeling victimized too.
There is a difference between responsible spending and martyred deprivation. There is a difference between treating ourselves well financially and overspending. We can learn to discern that difference. We can develop responsible spending habits that reflect high self esteem and love for ourselves.
Today, I will strive for balance in my spending habits. If I am overspending, I will stop and deal with what's going on inside me. If I am under spending or depriving myself, I will ask myself if that's necessary and what I want.
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong. --Ruth Fishel
**************************************************
Journey To The Heart
Learn to Focus Your Energy
“I’ve come to this lodge for one reason,” the woman at Breitenbush Retreat in Willamette Forest said. “I brought my fiddle, and I’m not leaving until I can play a bluegrass tune. If I want to get out of here, I’d better learn to play.
There is a time to be open, almost unfocused, as we take in what the world, the universe, is showing us. There is a time to get out of our heads and quietly take the journey our hearts lead us into– following with the openness and wonder of a child.
But there also comes a time to aim our attention and focus our energy on what we want to accomplish. Instead of floundering with scattered thoughts and possibilities, we choose one, then act on it. We stay in step with the natural rhythm, but we’re pulling our scattered attention together and focusing it as part of that rhythm.
To do that, we may have to work through or push away inner distractions. Moving through our inner obstacles enables us to accomplish our goal– whether that’s a task, a particular piece of work, or learning to play the fiddle.
Is there something you want to do? Is your heart urging you to learn something, accomplish something, go somewhere, do something? Make it a goal. Focus your energy. Learn to stay focused until you reach that goal.
Put yourself in the cabin and don’t let yourself out until it’s done.
**************************************************
More Language Of Letting Go
Stop being a sponge
You don’t have to be an emotional sponge, picking up every feeling around you. Learn to distinguish whether what you’re feeling belongs to you or to somebody else.
Linda has a grown son. Whenever her son is going through a difficult time, Linda takes her son’s emotions on, as if those feelings belonged to her. She’ll talk to her son on the phone for a while. He’ll express himself intensely and powerfully about how he really feels about everything in his life. After all, Linda’s his mom. It’s safe to tell her how he really feels, even if he can’t tell anyone else. Linda may feel fine when she begins talking to her son. But by the end of the conversation, Linda doesn’t feel that good anymore. She may feel angry, upset, or worried– or whatever her son was feeling before he talked to her.
Sometimes we soak up other people’s feelings because we forget to protect ourselves. Often, we do this because of the depth of feeling we have for this person. The remedy for this is the same as it is when we’re dealing with our own emotional stuff. We recognize what we’re feeling. We give that feeling its due. Then we let it go. We squeeze out the sponge.
Sometimes, it just takes the act of recognizing that we’ve taken on another person’s emotions to clear those emotions out. If we strive for awareness, we’ll begin to recognize when the feelings we’re feeling aren’t our own.
Children are often open and unprotected. If we’re going through a lot of feelings around them, they may absorb our emotions,too. It’s important to share our feelings with others and let people talk about their feelings to us. But we need to pay attention. If we’ve picked up someone else’s emotions, we need to let those feelings go.
God, help me know that part of being close to people and loving them means I sometimes take on their feelings. Show me how to protect myself so I can keep my heart open to the people I love without taking on their feelings.
Activity: As children, we may have absorbed emotions from our parents. These emotions can linger with us long into adulthood, shaping our beliefs and our general attitude toward life. These emotions can be tricky. We think they’re our own, but they’re not. They belong to someone else. Ask your Higher Power to show you whether you’ve absorbed any emotions from your parents or other people in your life. Then stay open to the responses you get to this prayer. If any emotions or memories begin popping into your consciousness, go to your journal and write about them. Just document the scene or memory that comes to mind. Then release the emotions. Set them free and let them go. Carrying around someone else’s feelings doesn’t help the other person and it doesn’t help us. You deserve to be free and clear.
**************************************************
Food for Thought
Tension or Hunger?
How often have we eaten because of tension, rather than hunger? Accepting our need for three measured meals a day with nothing in between establishes a sensible pattern, which satisfies our need for nourishment. When we are tense, we can find ways of relaxing which do not harm our body by making it fat.
Learning to relax the stomach muscles helps get rid of tension hunger. Often when we have eaten too fast because of tension, our stomach continues to send hunger signals after the meal. There has not been enough time for the digestive process to register satisfaction. We can consciously relax the muscles so that the feeling of emptiness will go away.
The best cure for tension is a growing faith in our Higher Power. If we are willing to trust Him in the little things of each day, as well as the big events of our life, we will be able to relax and cultivate serenity.
Dissolve my tension and feed my hunger, I pray.
**************************************************
Cause for Celebration
Honoring Everyday Life by Madisyn Taylor
Use the good china everyday as today is all that matters.
We all know someone who keeps plastic covers on his or her couch in order to protect it. The irony is that many of these people may live their lives without ever having actually made contact with their own furniture! This is a poignant and somewhat humorous example of the human tendency to try to save things for special occasions, as if everyday life weren’t special enough to warrant the use of nice things. Many of us have had the experience of never wearing a particular piece of clothing in order to keep it nice, only to have it go out of style in the meanwhile.
It’s interesting to think of what it would mean to us if we let ourselves wear our nicest clothes and eat off the good china on a daily basis. We might be sending ourselves the message that every day we are alive is a special day and a cause for celebration, and that we are worth it. There is something uplifting about treating ourselves to the finest of what we have. It is as if we rise to the occasion when we wear our best clothes and set the table beautifully, as if for a very special guest. We are more mindful of where we place things, what we are eating, and who is with us. Using the good china, eating in the dining room, and taking the plastic off the sofa might be an invitation to be more conscious of the beauty and grace inherent in our everyday lives.
If there are things you’ve stashed away for a special occasion—a bottle of special wine, a gorgeous pair of shoes, an antique lace tablecloth—consider taking them out of their hiding places and putting them to use tonight, just because you are alive now to enjoy them, and that’s a great cause for a celebration. Published with permission from Daily OM
**************************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we make only superficial changes in ourselves, and give only lip service to The Program, our progress is slow and the likelihood of relapse great. Our regeneration must take the form of a true spiritual rebirth. It must go very deep, within each character flaw replaced by a new and positive quality. Am I being completely honest with myself in uncovering the faults which hamper my spiritual growth? Am I beginning to replace them with positive qualities?
Today I Pray
May God’s protective hand lead me out of the darkness of my deepest fear — that I could return to being what I do now want to be. Please, God, give me courage to make an honest appraisal of myself. Please help me cultivate my positive qualities and begin to be free of my fears.
Today I Will Remember
I must be reborn in the Spirit.
**************************************************
One More Day
Should I, after tea and cakes and ices, Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis?
– Thomas Stearns Eliot
Some people call it “dancing around the issue.” After all, if there is a problem to face, we may become embarrassed when it’s time to talk about it. We try so hard to balance the emotional framework of our lives that we hardly want to be the one to bring up what seems to be a taboo topic. What we think, we don’t always state; what we intend, we don’t state clearly; and what we need, we rarely ask for. Our half-truths and mixed messages don’t result in honest communication.
Drug use? Manipulative behavior? Eating disorder? Financial problems? The only way to begin to face a problem is to admit that there is one, to talk about it, and to decide together what steps can be taken to help.
Today, I will face a problem honestly.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
CONTROL
“I offer you this prayer for all the difficult relationships in our lives:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change,
The courage to change the person I can,
And the wisdom to know that person is me.”
Rev. Mary Manin Morrissey
My disease tells me that my life would be so much better if people would only do what I tell them to do. If they would listen to me, I could solve all their problems, fix their lives, and everybody would be happy. Why can't they see that our relationships would be better if they'd just do what I say, and not what I do? Don't they realize that I know more than they do about how to run their lives?
Well, luckily for the people in my life, this disease lies. I DON'T know what's best for them. Because I have a disease of compulsion, I don't even know what's best for me. If I had known what was best for me, my life would not have been in shambles like it was before I found the Twelve Steps of recovery.
I had to come to the realization that my life had become unmanageable. Only then could I find a Higher Power to restore sanity to the crazy drama that had become my life ~ and to grant me the serenity which accompanies sanity. Now I realize the only person I can control is myself. I can't make other people change into what I want them to be, nor can I make them do what I think is best for them. Since I've begun letting my Higher Power restore me to sanity, I no longer want to be a control freak. I can't even fathom trying to run another person's life. I have enough on my hands just living my own life; I don't have the strength, knowledge or wisdom to live someone else's. I will always be grateful to my Higher Power for helping me to realize that.
One day at a time...
I will live my own life and allow others to live theirs.
~ Jeff
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Speaking at a dinner given by John D. Rockefeller Jr. to introduce Alcoholics Anonymous to some of his friends, Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick remarked:
'I think that psychologically speaking there is a point of advantage in the approach that is being made in this movement that cannot be duplicated. I suspect that if it is wisely handled - and it seems to be in wise and prudent hands - there are doors of opportunity ahead of this project that may surpass our capacities to imagine.' - Pg. 572 - 4th. Edition - Appendix V - The Religious View On A.A.
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whether serious and conservative or eager and flighty, newcomers often feel no necessity for embracing recovery. REMEMBER, millions have gone before you. You don't have to embrace the 12 steps but embrace something that works for recovery.
I embrace a program of recovery, not my self will, but a program I trust with clean and people that I can see!
Spiritual Transformation
Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person - respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has equal access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it.
I seek truth within myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
A main theme in most spiritual traditions states that the best way to get what you want is to provide it for another. If you want serenity, make it peaceful and serene for another. Do you want a feeling of safety? Provide a safe place for another. Do you want to understand what has happened? Help another to understand.
I teach best what I most need to learn.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The slogans work much better when you decorate your life with them rather than decorating the walls with them.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm getting younger in AA. When I came in I was an old man of thirty, I couldn't walk across the alley. Now at seventy I'm running marathons. - Waggy Bill.
bluidkiti
07-09-2015, 09:02 AM
July 10
Daily Reflections
TOWARD PEACE AND SERENITY
. . . when we have taken a square look at some of these defects, have
discussed them with another, and have become willing to have
them removed, our thinking about humility commences to have a
wider meaning.
12 & 12, p.74
When situations arise which destroy my serenity, pain often
motivates me to ask God for clarity in seeing my part in the
situation. Admitting my powerlessness, I humbly pray for
acceptance. I try to see how my character defects contribute to the
situation. Could I have been more patient? Was I intolerant? Did I
insist on having my own way? Was I afraid? As my defects are
revealed, I put self-reliance aside and humbly ask God to remove
my shortcomings. The situation may not change, but as I practice
exercising humility, I enjoy the peace and serenity which are the
natural benefits of placing my reliance in a power greater than
myself.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We in Alcoholics Anonymous do not enter into theological
discussions, but in carrying our message we attempt to explain the
simple "how" of the spiritual life. How faith in a Higher Power can
help you to overcome loneliness, fear, and anxiety. How it can
help you get along with other people. How it can make it possible
for you to rise above pain, sorrow, and despondency. How it can
help you to overcome your desires for the things that destroy. Have
I reached a simple, effective faith?
Meditation For The Day
Expect miracles of change in people's lives. Do not be held back
by unbelief. People can be changed and they are often ready and
waiting to be changed. Never believe that human nature cannot be
changed. We see changed people everyday. Do you have the faith
to make those changes possible? Modern miracles happen every
day in the lives of people. All miracles are in the realm of
personalities. Human nature can be changed and is always being
changed. But we must have enough faith so that we can be
channels for God's strength into the lives of others.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have the faith to expect miracles. I pray that I
may be used by God to help change the lives of others.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
The Beginning of Humility, p. 191
"There are few absolutes inherent in the Twelve Steps. Most Steps
are open to interpretation, based on the experience and outlook of the
individual.
"Consequently, the individual is free to start the Steps at whatever
point he can, or will. God, as we understand Him, may be defined as a
'Power greater . . .' or the Higher Power. For thousands of members,
the A.A. group itself has been a 'Higher Power' in the beginning. This
acknowledgment is easy to make if a newcomer knows that most of
the members are sober and he isn't.
"His admission is the beginning of humility--at least the newcomer is
willing to disclaim that he himself is God. That's all the start he
needs. If, following this achievement, he will relax and practice as
many of the Steps as he can, he is sure to grow spiritually."
Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
Foolish Risks
Maintaining the New Way
There are only a few practices that really must be considered unacceptable for recovering people. AA even concedes, for example, that there's nothing wrong with having lunch with a friend in a far if one's house is in order.
Under no circumstances, however, should recovering people do anything that puts their sobriety at risk. The stakes are TOO HIGH. Recovery is to precious. The new life is to important.
What practices might come under the heading of risky? A dangerous one, common among young and old alcoholics alike, is returning to the old crowd that's still drinking and drugging. It's risky to associate with our former drinking lifestyles, and we'll recognize this if we're working our program.
Part of the honesty I'll practice today is knowing my own motives for everything I do.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Everybody knows that when they're happy, than usually the people around them are happy.---George Harrison
Do we think we can't be happy until others are happy? Then nobody is happy. Our unhappy friends won't take our advice. They say,” Why should I do what you say? You are not happy either." And we answer, "I'll be okay when you're happy." We make them responsible for our happiness. What a mess!
We can only make one person happy---ourselves. How? By living as our Higher Power leads us. By working the Steps. By being grateful for the good things in our lives. By loving ourselves and others, just as we are.
And maybe when we're happy, our friends will learn from us. They can be happy too. But only our friends can make themselves happy.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, as I do my part in Your plan today, help me feel connected to You and to life.
Today's Action: Today I'll enjoy my happiness. I'll look for three ways to share it with others.
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Each Day a New Beginning
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. --Eleanor Roosevelt
We are competent women. We made a wise choice for ourselves when we decided to recover. Each day that we continue working this program our Spirits are strengthened. And our gifts will multiply.
Feeling inferior can become a habit. Being passive and feeling inferior go hand-in-hand, and they prepare us for becoming dependent on alcohol, pills, food, and people. We didn't understand, instinctively, that we are just who we're meant to be. We grew up believing we were not smart enough, not pretty enough, not capable enough. We grew up too distant from the source of our real strength.
How wonderful for us that we found the program! How lucky we are to have, for the taking, all the strength we'll ever need to face any situation, to handle any problem, to resolve any personal relationship conflict. Feeling inferior can be only a bad memory. The choice is ours. The program promises a better life. The Steps promise the strength to move forward. Our friends promise us outstretched hands.
I will look forward to the challenges of today with hope and strength and know that I am able to meet them.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill.
p. 89
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
About two days later I was called by a friend of mine from Nevada City---he's a brother of my wife's closest friend. He said, "Earle?" and I said, "Yes." He said, "I'm an alcoholic; what do I do?" And I gave him some idea of what you do, and so I made my first Twelfth Step call before I ever came into the program. The satisfaction I got from giving him a little of what I had read in those pamphlets far surpassed any feeling that I had ever had before in helping patients.
p. 303
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Therefore, thoroughness ought to be the watchword when taking inventory. In this connection, it is wise to write out our questions and answers. It will be an aid to clear thinking and honest appraisal. It will be the first tangible evidence of our complete willingness to move forward.
p. 54
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Today, God, help me be open to the joy and good feelings available to me.
--Melody Beattie
This I know...
There is nothing, absolutely nothing, no circumstance, no trouble, no
test, that can ever touch me, until first it comes past God. If it has
come that far, it has great purpose. I may not understand at the
moment, but as I refuse to panic, as I lift my eyes to Him and accept it
as coming from God, as a blessing for my heart, no sorrow will disturb
me, no trial will disarm me, no problem will cause me to fret, and
absolutely nothing will make me drink. For I shall rest in the knowing
and joy of my Higher Power.
--unknown
Today I am learning to be gentle with myself. Today I can look in the
mirror and smile and know that I am okay just as I am. I am treating
myself softly today.
--Ruth Fishel
Progress always involves risk; you can't steal second base and keep
your foot on first.
--Frederick Wilcox
It takes time for nature to change things into what they're becoming.
It takes time for things to develop. Be patient with yourself and life.
Trust the process of growth.
--Melody Beattie
I open my heart to the love that is God in greater measure than ever
before. I expand my capacity to give and receive love, to serve
and be served, to seek and trust the guidance revealed in my heart.
--Linda Watson
Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by
people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at
all.
--Dale Carnegie
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
THOUGHT
"Thought makes the whole
dignity of man; therefore
endeavor to think well, that is
the only morality."
-- Blaise Pascal
I think that human beings are very imitative creatures; we imitate
clothes, hair styles, mannerisms and lifestyles. A man's mind will
be influenced by what he listens to and what he reads. And what
we think is very important to sobriety.
Today I make an effort to examine my thinking and check it out with
a sponsor or in a support group. I know that my dignity in sobriety
is connected not only with what I do but also with my attitudes
and thoughts --- when my thinking begins to go crazy, I know I am
in a dangerous place and I need to talk. God created me with the
ability to think, therefore, I need to safeguard the information I put
in my mind.
Let me learn to develop morality of mind.
************************************************** *********
"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."
2 Corinthians 12:9
"I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can
snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is
greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father's hand."
John 10: 28-29
"On the last and greatest day of the Feast, Jesus stood and said in
a loud voice, "If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink."
John 7:37
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Daily Inspiration
Set aside your concerns while you spend a little time in prayer and allow God to be the one who comforts you. Lord, I accept the gift of Your love because it makes me feel safe and secure.
Rejoice. This is the day the Lord has made. Lord, my days pass so quickly. May I have a generous heart and the time to see the needs of those around me.
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NA Just For Today
A Positive Attitude
"That old nest of negativism followed me everywhere I went." Basic Text, p.135
A negative attitude is the trademark of active addiction. Everything that occurred in our lives was someone or something else's fault. We had blaming others for our shortcomings down to a fine science. In recovery, one of the first things we strive to develop is a new attitude. We find that life goes a lot easier when we replace our negative thinking with positive principles.
While a negative attitude dogged us in our active addiction, all too often it can follow us into the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. How can we begin to adjust our attitudes? By altering our actions. It isn't easy, but it can be done.
We can start by listening to the way we talk. Before we open our mouths, we ask ourselves some simple questions: Does what I'm going to say speak to the problem, or the solution? Is what I'm going to say framed in a kind manner? Is what I have to say important, or would everyone be just as well off if I kept my mouth shut? Am I talking just to hear myself talk, or is there some purpose to my "words of wisdom?"
Our attitudes are expressed in our actions. Often, it's not what we say, but the way we say it, that really matters. As we learn to speak in a more positive manner, we will notice our attitudes improving as well.
Just for today: I want to be free of negativity. Today, I will speak and act positively.
pg.200
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
What a man thinks of himself, that is which determines, or rather indicates, his fate. --Henry David Thoreau
Let us think of ourselves as made of dust, and allow us to be as proud of it as if it were true. For dust is everywhere. We see it in solemn rooms streaked by sun, dancing like fine angels in a cathedral light. It is the stuff of life. And it drifts down on fancy tables where the richest people eat. It cannot be denied a place. And it returns time and a time again like the seasons. It is one of the wonders of the world. And when no one sees or cares, it finds a secret corner in which to keep a solitary peace. It intends no harm. We find it at home on old leather books, the ones that preserve our noblest thoughts.
And from where we stand, it seems that even the stars are made of it. When we feel low, unworthy, or useless, let's remember that these feelings are only a small but important part of us, that even great things are made of small parts, and that we, as whole beings, are always greater than the sum of these parts.
What feelings am I made of today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out. --Karl A. Menninger
Two of the problems common to men in this program are fear and lack of trust. Many of us have unconsciously enlarged our fears and returned to them again and again. Do we dwell excessively on fears? Are we too fearful about our health? Money? Jobs? Love? Jealousy? The future? What other people think?
Many of us are victims of our fears and anxieties. Fears in moderation are healthy signals to us. But we need to learn to be more trusting. We can simply open ourselves to the possibility that things will turn out well. We don't need to be blind to the negatives - only have our eyes less fixed on them. No one can ever prove to us that it is finally safe to trust.
Fearfulness is the problem, not any one fear. Trusting our Higher Power, we set our tearfulness aside, even if a few particular fears remain.
Today, I will be open to learn about trust.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. --Eleanor Roosevelt
We are competent women. We made a wise choice for ourselves when we decided to recover. Each day that we continue working this program our Spirits are strengthened. And our gifts will multiply.
Feeling inferior can become a habit. Being passive and feeling inferior go hand-in-hand, and they prepare us for becoming dependent on alcohol, pills, food, and people. We didn't understand, instinctively, that we are just who we're meant to be. We grew up believing we were not smart enough, not pretty enough, not capable enough. We grew up too distant from the source of our real strength.
How wonderful for us that we found the program! How lucky we are to have, for the taking, all the strength we'll ever need to face any situation, to handle any problem, to resolve any personal relationship conflict. Feeling inferior can be only a bad memory. The choice is ours. The program promises a better life. The Steps promise the strength to move forward. Our friends promise us outstretched hands.
I will look forward to the challenges of today with hope and strength and know that I am able to meet them.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Ending Relationships
It takes courage and honesty to end a relationship - with friends, loved ones, or a work relationship.
Sometimes, it may appear easier to let the relationship die from lack of attention rather than risk ending it. Sometimes, it may appear easier to let the other person take responsibility for ending the relationship.
We may be tempted to take a passive approach. Instead of saying how we feel, what we want or don't want, or what we intend to do, we may begin sabotaging the relationship, hoping to force the other person to do the difficult work.
Those are ways to end relationships, but they are not the cleanest or the easiest ways.
As we walk this path of self-care, we learn that when it is time to end a relationship, the easiest way is one of honesty and directness. We are not being loving, gentle, or kind by avoiding the truth, if we know the truth.
We are not sparing the other person's feelings by sabotaging the relationship instead of accepting the end or the change, and doing something about it. We are prolonging and increasing the pain and discomfort - for the other person and ourselves.
If we don't know, if we are on the fence, it is more loving and honest to say that.
If we know it is time to terminate a relationship, say that.
Endings are never easy, but endings are not made easy by sabotage, indirectness, and lying about what we want and need to do. Say what you need to say, in honesty and love, when it is time. If we are trusting and listening to ourselves, we will know what to say and when to say it.
Today, I will remember that honesty and directness will increase my self-esteem. God, help me let go of my fear about owning my power to take care of myself in all my relationships.
Today I will share my strength, hope and experience with someone still in pain. I will serve as I power of example to someone who is willing to let go of her suffering. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Trust the Timing of Your Lessons
Too often our first inclination when we learn a lesson, gain a new insight, have an awareness, or glimpse a new truth is to judge and criticize ourselves– for not seeing it sooner, not knowing it before, or being in denial too long. That’s not necessary. It’s not appropriate. We’re not at fault because we didn’t have this awareness or understand this lesson until now.
We don’t need to see the truth one moment before we see it. Judging ourselves for not knowing sooner can close us off to what life has to teach us now. We’re here to learn our lessons, discover our truths, have our adventures.
Let yourself have your experiences. Allow yourself to learn what you learn when you learn it. Don’t judge yourself for not learning sooner. Be happy, grateful, and excited when your lesson arrives.
Trust your voice, that quiet inner voice, when it speaks to you of truth. Be grateful you can hear it, do what it tells you to do. Trust the timing of your heart.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let the drama go
Actors in movies or on television often must exaggerate their feelings in order to create drama on the screen. If they are hurt, they cry with a special intensity. If afraid, they scream and cower in a corner or curl up on a sofa. They may grab a person trying to leave and beg for that person to stay. In rage, they may stomp around hollering in a dramatic storm.
We can learn to separate what we’re feeling from what we do. If we’re feeling fear, hurt, anger, or any other emotion, we need to experience the emotion until we become clear. Sometimes beating a pillow helps release our anger. But we don’t have to stomp around and slam doors. That’s letting our emotions control us.
You don’t have to revel in your emtions. And you can separate your behaviors– what you do– from what you feel.
Stop being a twentieth-century drama queen. It isn’t necessary anymore. We are more conscious than that now.
God, help me let go of the unnecessary drama in my life.
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Food for Thought
A Progressive Illness
It is the experience of recovering compulsive overeaters that the illness is progressive. The disease does not get better; it gets worse. Even while we abstain, the illness progresses. If we were to break our abstinence, we would find that we had even less control over our eating than before.
Continued abstinence is our only means of health and sanity. We well remember the misery and despair that we felt when we were overeating, and we do not want to feel that way again. Abstaining from one compulsive bite is a small price to pay for health and sanity.
When we find ourselves thinking thoughts, which in the past have preceded loss of control, we need to realize the great danger that lies in a relapse. The OA program has saved us from the destruction of compulsive overeating, but our disease is still alive. Our program needs to be foremost in our minds every day if we are to continue recovering.
Do not let me forget my illness.
************************************************** *************
In God’s Care
God is in charge. ~~Daily Word
A basic truth in our life, about which we need never be concerned, is that we are in the care of a loving God – always. And we can feel and unquestioningly know this presence if we choose to acknowledge it. When we take a moment to reflect on our past good fortunes – that we found this program, that our relationships with others are on the mend, that we harbor deep-seated fear far less often – we can use them to bolster our faith that our Higher Power is here, now and will remain our constant, caring companion.
For some of us, faith in a greater Power comes easily. But many of us begin to have faith only through Acting As If. By quieting our mind, visualizing a loving presence, and breathing in the warmth and comfort, we can find the peace that is God. Through “practicing the presence,” we’ll strengthen our faith and ensure our peacefulness.
I can feel the peace I desire today through my own efforts to remember God.
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Day By Day
Avoiding criticism
Criticism is hard to take. If we don’t want to be criticized, we shouldn’t criticize others. At the same time, expressing concern in a loving way is not being critical.
We are entitled to our opinions, but we are not entitled to put other people down. Sharing our experience, strength, and hope is a way to help others, not to make them feel small.
Can I express loving concern? Can I share without making comparisons?
Higher Power, help me recognize when I am becoming critical; help me to be loving and humble.
Today I will praise…
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Finding Encouragement
Your True Inner Voice by Madisyn Taylor
The longer you listen to and believe your true inner voice, the stronger it will become.
Within each of us, there are numerous voices often that compete for our attention. It can be difficult to decide which one to listen to, particularly when their messages are all quite different, sometimes conflicting, and even alluring. One voice, however, is the speaker of truth. Among all your inner voices, your true inner voice is the one which encourages you, gives you hope, and pushes you to trust and believe in yourself. Conflict within oneself is often caused by dueling voices inside of each one of us. As we move through life, we get mixed messages from the various aspects of ourselves. Some of our voices, such as the naysayer or saboteur, can speak so loudly that they drown out the voice of truth. Listening to your true inner voice – often the voice of understanding, support, and self-assurance - can help lessen and even resolve internal conflict.
If you’re looking toward the future but your faith in your ability to succeed in life is wavering, you will benefit from finding and listening to your true inner voice. You can connect with it by remaining relaxed and alert, while listening carefully. If you have trouble distinguishing your true voice from the others, meditation may be helpful. You may hear many voices as you meditate, but the one you should pay attention to is the one that speaks to you with love, understanding, and compassion. It will bolster your spirits and urge you to go after your dreams. And it will never cause confusion, remind you of past mistakes, or cause you to doubt yourself.
The more you listen to and believe in what your true inner voice is telling you about your value and your potential, the stronger that voice will become. And the more you disregard the voices that can interfere with your resolve to succeed, the quieter those voices will become. Saying no to the voices that are judgmental and make you feel ashamed will help you stop being critical of your failures and afraid of success. By finding and strengthening your true inner voice, you will be able to ignore internal conflict and pick out the one that speaks the truth. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The Program is a road, not a resting place. Before we came to The Program — and, for some of us, many times afterward, — most of us looked for answers to our living problems in religion, philosophy, psychology, self-help groups, and so on. Invariable, these fields held forth the goals that were precisely what we wanted; they offered freedom, calm, confidence and joy. But there was one major loophole: They never gave us a workable method of getting there. They never told us how to get from where we were to where we were suppose to be. Do I truly believe that I can find everything that I need and really want through the Twelve Steps?
Today I Pray
May I know that, once through the Twelve Steps, I am not a plane surface. For life is not a flat field, but a slope upward. And those flights of steps must be taken over and over and remembered. May I be sure that once I have made them totally familiar to me, they will take me anywhere I want to go.
Today I Will Remember
The Steps are a road, not a resting place.
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One More Day
It is costly wisdom that is bought by experience.
– Roger Ascham
Wisdom is gained in many ways. We can learn from others, if we’re willing. We can listen to the voice within — that inner sense of what can and should be done. Or we can — and quite often do — pay the price for that wisdom gained from experience.
Sometimes, we ignore the cautioning voices of well-meaning friends and of our instincts, and leap instead onto foolhardy or dangerous ground. It might have to do with family problems or finances or even our personal care. Often if we fail, we pay a great price — in terms of relationships, money, or health. But even our failures are not wasted if from them we gain the wisdom of caution and care.
I will try to listen and learn from others and thereby save myself some pain.
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One Day At A Time
SANITY
"Came to believe ...
That a power greater than ourselves ...
Could restore us to sanity."
Step Two
What a powerful statement! There's a power greater than me. At first glance it seemed so frightening. As I looked at my situation, it seemed impossible ... who or what could be greater than I am? To be "restored" to sanity meant I must be crazy. After all, that is what insanity means. My Higher Power happened to be my sponsor and she was determined enough to be that power, if only until I opened the door to another.
One day when my ears were open and my mouth shut, these words came from another sufferer: "God can." I thought to myself, "What?! What does 'God can' mean?" Later -- when my body was clean and my mind receptive -- those words came to mean a great deal to me. "God can" if I let Him. God can take away my compulsion to overeat. God can remove my desire for nicotine. God can take away my desire for booze. Yes, God can.
I no longer worry about what I can't accomplish because I know that "God can." So now when my day begins I think of what I can do right, and do it for today. That which I cannot do right -- I just let God handle that. We make a pretty good team, God and me.
One Day at a Time . . .
I let my Higher Power restore me to sanity.
~ Danny
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
This thought brings us to STEP TEN, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. - Pg. 84 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
What are the daily habits that you are forming right now to aid your recovery? Picking up this book is a good habit. If this doesn't quiet your spirit, you pick up another program book; if that doesn't work you must call a program person; if that doesn't work, then you meet them in person. Our hourly habits form our daily habits which form our recovery.
I ask the Divine Forces to help me implement the changes I need in my hourly habits to aid my recovery.
Becoming Real
Today, I let go and become real. I know that by holding on too tightly, I squeeze the life out of myself and those around me. Recovery has taught me to value being authentic above being something or someone. Recovery is a process of facing and removing those obstacles that have been in the way on my road back to myself. It has been my willingness to risk and trust that my Higher Power will hold me that has brought me to life again. Now it is time for me to live each day as it comes and give some of what I have received. So many people have helped me along the way - it is also part of my recovery to share what I have learned, in case it might help someone else.
I am open to life and all it holds.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
If you have one hand in the fellowship and one hand in your Higher Power's, you can't pick up today.
I put my hand in my Higher Power's by saying. 'Thy will not mine be done;' I put my hand in the fellowship by saying 'I'll be there, at the next meeting.'
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
As you sponsor others, remember this: If you are trying to recreate someone in your own image, then one of you will be redundant.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will share my strength, hope and experience with someone still in pain. I will serve as I power of example to someone who is willing to let go of her suffering.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Fellowship for long winded speakers: Alconon and on, and on.. - Ted H.
bluidkiti
07-10-2015, 08:38 AM
July 11
Daily Reflections
A TURNING POINT, p.301
A great turning point in our lives came when we sought for humility
as something we really wanted, rather than as something we must
have.
12 & 12, p.75
Either the A.A. way of life becomes one of joy or I return to the
darkness and despair of alcoholism. Joy comes to me when my
attitude concerning God and humility turns to one of desire rather
than of burden. The darkness in my life changes to radiant light
when I arrive at the realization that being truthful and honest in
dealing with my inventory results in my life being filled with serenity,
freedom, and joy. Trust in my Higher Power deepens, and the flush
of gratitude spreads through my being. I am convinced that being
humble is being truthful and honest in dealing with myself and God.
It is then that humility is something I "really want," rather being
"something I must have."
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We in Alcoholics Anonymous do not try to chart the path for the
human soul or try to lay out a blueprint of the working of faith, as
one might plan a charity drive. We do tell the newcomer that we
have renewed our faith in a Higher Power. In the telling, our faith
is further renewed. We believe that faith is always close at
hand, waiting for those who will listen to the heartbeat of the
spirit. We believe there is a force for good in the universe and
that if we link up with this force, we are carried onward to a new
life. Am I in this stream of goodness?
Meditation For The Day
God will protect you from the forces of evil, if you will rely on
Him. You can face all things through the power of God which
strengthens you. Once God has set on you His stamp and seal of
ownership, all His strength will serve and protect you. Remember
that you are a child of the Father. Realize that the Father's help is
always ready and available to all His children, so that they can
face anything. God will do all that is necessary for your spiritual
well-being, if you will let Him live His way.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may rely on God as I go through this day. I pray that I
may feel deeply secure, no matter what happens to me.
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As Bill Sees It
Carrying the Message, p. 192
The wonderful energy the Twelfth Step releases, by which it carries
our message to the next suffering alcoholic and finally translates the
Twelve Steps into action upon all our affairs, is the payoff, the
magnificent reality of A.A.
********************************
Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop;
simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him
how they worked with you. Offer him friendship and fellowship.
1. 12 & 12, p. 109
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 95
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Walk In Dry Places
The rewards of Truth
Seeking the Truth
The punishment of the liar is that he cannot believe anyone else, wrote one shrewd philosopher. This is another way of saying that we reap what we sow, or that we tend to judge others by our own actions.
But when we decide to be completely truthful, we are not immediately given the ability to discern whether others are lying or not. It's more important for us to realize that others lies don't have the power to hurt us permanently if we persevere in the program.
Some people would argue with this, pointing to lies that have hurt innocent people in the past. But having no way of knowing all the facts of these cases, we cannot be the judge.
In our own experiences, we'll find that God alone is the source of all truth and will give us the protection and care we need if we seek truthfulness in everything we do. Any fear of being victimized by living, we'll learn, will melt away as we follow this conviction.
I'll be as discreet as possible today, but I'll also be truthful. I'll find that this alone will lessen any fear of being victimized by a liar.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
If you would be loved, love and be lovable.---Benjamin Franklin
We all want to be loved. and no matter how much we're loved, we always want more.
How can we be lovable? What does the mean? Should we try to be perfect? Should we act cute and helpless? No, being lovable means that we act ourselves. We let others get to know us. When others love us, we enjoy it. We tell them. We let them know that their love isn't wasted on us, that it's important to us. We are lovable, and we are loved!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me accept the love of others today. Help me be lovable.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list all the little things others do that show that they care for me.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I have listened to the realm of the Spirit. I have heard my own soul's voice, and I have remembered that love is the complete and unifying thread of existence. --Mary Casey
The act of loving someone else brings us together, closes whatever the gap between us. It draws us into the world of another, making richer the world we call our own. Love is the great equalizer.
We no longer wish to conquer or dominate those whom we love. And our love for one increases our capacity for loving others. Love heals another, and love heals ourselves, both giving it and receiving it.
Love from another acknowledges our existence, assuring us that we do count, that someone else values our presence. It is human to need these reminders, these assurances. But our need for them is lessened each time we acknowledge another person in our midst.
Where love is absent, people, even in a crowd, feel alone, forgotten, and unimportant. No doubt we can each recall times of quiet desperation moments of alienation. We must reach out to someone and send thoughts of love to someone who may need to be remembered. Our loving thoughts for persons close and far away always reach their destination. They do unify us.
Love is powerful. It can change the complexion of the universe. It will change the direction of my life.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.
p. 89
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
So I decided that I would go to my first meeting. I was introduced as a psychiatrist. (I belong to the American Psychiatrist Society, but I don't practice psychiatry as such. I am surgeon.)
p. 303
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
All of A.A.'s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural desires . . . they all deflate our egos. When it comes to ego deflation, few Steps are harder to take than Five. But scarcely any Step is more necessary to longtime sobriety and peace of mind than this one.
p. 55
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There are no burdens when everybody lifts.
--unknown
When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day" I always
wonder, how can that be? How can you not have all day?
--unknown
Learn to say kind words, nobody resents them.
--unknown
Is not life a hundred times too short for us to bore ourselves?
--Friedrich Nietzsche
First mend yourself, and then mend others.
--Jewish Proverb
Always look at your moccasin tracks first before you speak of
another's faults.
--Native American Proverb
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CHANGE
"The foolish and the dead never
change their opinion."
--James Russell Lowell
Part of my understanding of spirituality is that I will change. I will
change my mind, my attitude and my opinion. My understanding of
sobriety is that I will grow, grow in an understanding of myself,
grow in an understanding of God's will for me, and grow in an
understanding of other people. Today I am not afraid to change my
thinking about life.
During my years as an addict I was fixed and rigid about everything.
I saw it as weakness to change my mind and opinions. Now I
understand that I was afraid of change, afraid not to have an answer,
afraid not to be seen as being "in charge".
In treatment I learned how to understand spirituality as reality;
seeing things as they are, rather than how I wanted them to be. I
began to accept that life is about change and that truth is a
process that we evolve towards.
In my journey towards You may I have the willingness to change.
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"Apply your heart to instruction, And your ears to words of knowledge."
Proverbs 23:12
"The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I
have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more
abundantly."
John 10:10
"As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our
transgressions from us."
Psalm 103:12
"Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your
hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation
of Jesus Christ."
1 Peter 1:13
"as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts,
as in your ignorance; but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy
in all your conduct."
1 Peter 1:14-15
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Daily Inspiration
The presence of God in us puts a joy in our soul that is beyond our ability to explain. Lord, when I open my self to this joy, I am renewed and peaceful.
Let today's difficulties make you better not bitter. Lord, guide me, protect me and work through me.
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NA Just For Today
Encouragement
"We share comfort and encouragement with others."
Basic Text, p.95
Many of us have watched as babies take their first steps. The mother holds the child on its feet. The father kneels nearby with outstretched arms, encouraging the little one, his face flooded with devotion. The baby takes a few small steps toward its father. An older brother and sister cheer the tyke on. Baby falls down. Its mother, murmuring words of comfort, picks the child up and starts over again. This time, baby stays up until it is close enough to fall into the safety of its father's arms. As newcomers, we arrive in the rooms of NA much like this small child. Accustomed to living a life crippled by addiction, full of fear and uncertainty, we need help to stand. Just like a child beginning its march toward adulthood, we take our halting first steps toward recovery. We learn to live this new way of life because others who have gone before us encourage and comfort us by telling us what worked-and what didn't work-for them. Our sponsor is there for us when we need a push in the right direction.
Many times we feel like we can't take another step in recovery. Just like a child learning to walk, we sometimes stumble or fall. But our Higher Power always awaits us with outstretched arms And like the child's brothers and sisters shouting their encouragement, we, too, are supported by other NA members as we walk toward a full life in recovery.
Just for today: I will seek encouragement from others. I will encourage others who may need my strength.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Always think of what you have to do as easy and it will become so. --Emile Corie
How we think about the activities before us is very important. If we think cleaning the garage is hard, dirty, and no chance for fun, that's just how it will feel. We'll be tired before we even begin. However, if we approach it like a treasure hunt, expecting to rediscover some long-forgotten treasures, we'll enjoy the task. In fact, it will feel like a game.
The thoughts we carry in our minds determine whether our tasks are fun or not. What good fortune it is that we can control those thoughts. If we approach an assignment for school or a job believing that we're able to do it, that it's not too hard for us, we'll finish with ease. Our thoughts determine our successes. In this way, our lives are in our own hands.
How much better can I make my life today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
In playing, and perhaps only in playing, the child or adult is free to be creative. --D. W. Winnicott
There are so many activities called play, which have not really been playful. Organized sports for youth, which consumed some of us, are called play. The partying, which was connected with some of our addictions, is called play. Reckless and dangerous driving is called play. In recovery, some of us become intensely focused on doing what's right, and we need a deeper understanding to take the spiritual leap into creative play
This leap takes a willingness to let go. Maybe we remember hurtful things happening when our guard was down. Creative play involves trusting that every activity doesn't need a worthy goal, doesn't need to be planned out. Pleasure, humor, lightness, and aimless passing of time are forms of openness to the spirit of God. It is experimenting, exploring, setting aside our ordered and planned approach to most of life, and accepting that what comes out will be all right.
God, help me see the possibilities for play in the moments of this day.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I have listened to the realm of the Spirit. I have heard my own soul's voice, and I have remembered that love is the complete and unifying thread of existence. --Mary Casey
The act of loving someone else brings us together, closes whatever the gap between us. It draws us into the world of another, making richer the world we call our own. Love is the great equalizer.
We no longer wish to conquer or dominate those whom we love. And our love for one increases our capacity for loving others. Love heals another, and love heals ourselves, both giving it and receiving it.
Love from another acknowledges our existence, assuring us that we do count, that someone else values our presence. It is human to need these reminders, these assurances. But our need for them is lessened each time we acknowledge another person in our midst.
Where love is absent, people, even in a crowd, feel alone, forgotten, and unimportant. No doubt we can each recall times of quiet desperation moments of alienation. We must reach out to someone and send thoughts of love to someone who may need to be remembered. Our loving thoughts for persons close and far away always reach their destination. They do unify us.
Love is powerful. It can change the complexion of the universe. It will change the direction of my life.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Bring Any Request to God
Bring any request you have to God.
No request is too large; none too small or insignificant.
How often we limit God by not bringing to God everything we want and need.
Do we need help getting our balance? Getting through the day?
Do we need help in a particular relationship? With a particular character defect? Attaining a character asset?
Do we need help making progress on a particular task that is challenging us? Do we need help with a feeling? Do we want to change a self-defeating belief that has been challenging us? Do we need information, an insight? Support? A friend?
Is there something in God's Universe that would really bring us joy?
We can ask for it. We can ask God for whatever we want. Put the request in God's hands, trusting it has been heard then let it go. Leave the decision to God.
Asking for what we want and need is taking care of ourselves. Trust that the Higher Power to whom we have turned over our life and will really does care about us and about what we want and need.
Today, I will ask my Higher Power for what I want and need. I will not demand - I will ask. Then I will let go.
Today I look within to find my truth. I ask a power greater than myself to guide me and show me the way and all I have to do is follow. It is that simple. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Clear the Path to Your Heart
I watched Old Faithful from my window. The geyser gurgled and spewed a low layer of steam. Then true to its name, Old Faithful erupted and sprayed thousands of gallons of steaming water into the air. Right on time.
A full range of gurgling emotions, reactions, and responses to life line the pathway to the heart. We need to feel them all– anger, hurt, sadness, irritations– in order to feel joy. To experience life and all its wonders, we must embrace all these feelings.
We need to experience the little anger as well as the big hurts, the painful wounds that life sometimes brings. To insist that we will only feel pleasant emotions means we’re blocking the pathway to the heart. We’re ignoring all the other gurgling emotions that need to be felt.
All our emotions are important; all need to be recognized. The energy of each needs to be acknowledged and released. This clears the way for love. All the emotions that precede love clear the heart, so it’s pure and free to feel joy.
Trust your emotions. All of them. You’re not off the path. They lead to the path you’re seeking. They are the journey to the heart. Let them flow freely. And sure as Old Faithful, your heart will come gleaming, shining through.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Stop building cases
You don’t have to build a big drama around your life. We may need to end a relationship or explore a new career. Instead of simply saying, This is what I’m going to do, we build a case.
Like a lawyer getting ready to go to court, we prepare our arguments. We take one feeling and build a hundred-page document around it, prepared to battle our case.
You can build cases if you want to. But usually, there’s a hidden feeling underneath all that case-building that’s asking to be cleared. It could be a tinge of guilt or fear. Or it could just be the belief that it’s not okay to clearly express ourselves, say how it feels to us, and do what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
Let go of the drama. Just say what you need and how it feels to you.
Be as simple and clear as you can in expressing yourself. If you find yourself building a case or creating a big dramatic scene, take a moment. Why are you making such a fuss.
God, help me keep it simple, especially when it comes to expressing myself.
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In God’s Care
We are only as sick as the secrets we keep.
~~Anonymous
We all have our secrets. Some of them we’re not about to tell anybody. God, of course, already knows them. There may be some things we consider so shameful that we can’t share them with anyone. But shame seperates us from God. It’s a way of saying we are too horrible, too different – it’s a form of false pride.
To hide something means we’re holding on to the shame. Not until we’re ready to admit to God, ourselves, and another human being the nature of our secrets can we be rid of our shame. But when we come to believe that we have nothing to fear from sharing our secrets, God will transform them into something useful and constructive. There is nothing we have ever done that can’t be used to help someone, ourselves included.
Today I will share my secrets with someone.
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Day By Day
Showing empathy
When we first got into recovery, most of us were quite unhappy. We were in pain; we were vulnerable. We were angry and impatient. We probably didn’t like ourselves very much and may not have liked other people much.
But what if others had treated us according to these feelings? Weren’t we forgiven? Accepted? (And if we weren’t, wouldn’t it have been better if we had been?) Today, we see that we are the same as everyone else who is struggling to achieve or maintain a drug-free life. If we treat everyone well, it will help us recover.
Am I practicing generosity and compassion?
Higher Power, help me to treat others as I would want to be treated.
Today I will be especially campassionate toward…
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Food for Thought
Goals and Ends
Most of us came into this program with a specific weight goal in mind. We thought that if only we could weigh an ideal number of pounds, all of our other troubles would miraculously vanish.
When we reach goal weight, we discover that we still have to live with ourselves and deal with our problems. If we have been developing a strong program as we have been losing weight, we have a basis on which to work for further emotional and spiritual growth.
Our emotional and spiritual goals are not static. Since we never achieve perfection, there is always opportunity for further progress. The beauty of the OA program is that it is a program for life; its possibilities are limitless. To know and do the will of our Higher Power is our ultimate goal as well as our immediate one.
May I remember that You are my goal today and always.
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The World in a Bright Light
Grateful by Madisyn Taylor
There is always something to be grateful for even when life is hard and times are tough.
Everyday is a blessing, and in each moment there are many things that we can be grateful for. The world opens up to us when we live in a space of gratitude. In essence, gratitude has a snowball effect. When we are appreciative and express that gratitude, the universe glows a bit brighter and showers us with even more blessings.
There is always something to be grateful for, even when life seems hard. When times are tough, whether we are having a bad day or stuck in what may feel like an endless rut, it can be difficult to take the time to feel grateful. Yet, that is when gratitude can be most important. If we can look at our lives, during periods of challenge, and find something to be grateful for, then we can transform our realities in an instant. There are blessings to be found everywhere. When we are focusing on what is negative, our abundance can be easy to miss. Instead, choosing to find what already exists in our lives that we can appreciate can change what we see in our world. We start to notice one blessing, and then another.
When we constantly choose to be grateful, we notice that every breath is a miracle and each smile becomes a gift. We begin to understand that difficulties are also invaluable lessons. The sun is always shining for us when we are grateful, even if it is hidden behind clouds on a rainy day. A simple sandwich becomes a feast, and a trinket is transformed into a treasure. Living in a state of gratitude allows us to spread our abundance because that is the energy that we emanate from our beings. Because the world reflects back to us what we embody, the additional blessings that inevitably flow our way give us even more to be grateful for. The universe wants to shower us with blessings. The more we appreciate life, the more life appreciates and bestows us with more goodness. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Someone once defined the ego as “the sum total of false ideas about myself.” Persistent reworking of the Twelve Steps enables me to gradually strip away my false ideas about myself. This permits nearly imperceptible but steady growth in my understanding of the truth about myself. And this, in turn, leads to a growing understanding of God and other human beings. Do I strive fro self-honesty, promptly admitting when I’m wrong?
Today I Pray
God, teach me understanding; teach me to know truth when I meet it; teach me the importance of self-honesty, so that I may be able to say, sincerely, “I was wrong.” along with, “I am sorry.” Teach me that there is such a thing as a “healthy ego” which does not require that feelings be medicated by mood-alters. May I — slowly, on my tightrope– move toward the ideal of balance, so I can do away with the nets of falsehood and compulsion.
Today I Will Remember
To keep my balance.
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One More Day
The biggest thing in our today’s sorrow is the memory of yesterday’s pain.
– Kahlil Gibran
Even though we intellectually know that a chronic illness will never go away, we emotionally offer ourselves a small glimmer of hope of recovery, of our lives going on as before.
We may spend some time reviewing life’s memories, closing out whole chapters, and dealing with how life used to be. Then we can open a whole new section of life that allows us to include pain and sickness as part of our days. We work in the frame of reference of today. This is today’s problem, and we can work it into our lives. Acknowledging that we are living a part of our lives differently from before will be our first step toward adjustment. We accept, we change, and we begin to create new joys in the present to ease our sorrow.
By altering my goals, I once again can move into the mainstream of life.
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One Day At A Time
HONESTY
“Our lives improve only when we take chances ~
and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves.”
Walter Anderson
After the initial shock and realization that I am a compulsive overeater, it transpired that in order to recover, I had to get honest. This was -- and still is -- a painful process for me, yet it is an essential step towards my recovery.
First I had to admit that I wasn't in control of my life and that recovery couldn't be achieved unaided. As with most revelations, this was an uncomfortable truth to behold. I was also prompted through honesty to stop blaming everyone else for my unwillingness to help myself. I had to find conviction in my actions and not just emptiness in my words.
I conceded that I am not as perfect as I would like to think. I make mistakes and sometimes slip from the path of recovery, but with honesty comes acceptance that I am only human. This disease would deceive me into thinking that I am a failure when in fact it's my actions that have failed me. Like a magician who performs illusions for the crowd, this disease would have me think I have committed unforgivable sins. Honesty is the key to my recovery; it unlocks the chains that have imprisoned me for so long. It allows me to recognize my weaknesses and turn them into strengths. It turns simple existence into life ~ and inner-conflicts into outward serenity.
One day at a time...
I will be honest with myself.
~ Sue G.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Upon therapy for the alcoholic himself, we surely have no monopoly. Yet it is our great hope that all those who have yet found no answer may begin to find one in the pages of this book and will presently join us on the high road to a new freedom. - Pg. xxi - 4th. Edition - Forward To Second Edition
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There are no magic wands or burning bushes in our program. Just footwork and faith.
My footwork right now is to not use any mind-affecting chemical and go to a meeting today.
One Foot in Front of the Other
Today, all I have to do is live the next hour as well as I can. I will not get ahead of myself. I cannot be anywhere but right where I am. When I allow myself to be here now, to live in the present fully and freely, the rest of life takes care of itself. So few people live in the moment, that in itself will make me rare. That will make me someone I feel good about being and others can enjoy being around. When I am in the moment, the next right action reveals itself. When I align my will with the will of my Higher Power, I become one with diving purpose and I connect with the spirituality of life.
I surrender to the path
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
90 meetings in 90 days is not nearly enough. Tell newcomers to always catch a ride or give a ride to their daily meeting. This way they get a meeting on the way to the meeting, a meeting during the meeting, and a meeting on the way home. That makes 270 meetings in the first 90 days!
Who am I taking to a meeting tonight?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Any failure will tell you-success is nothing but luck.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I look within to find my truth. I ask a power greater than myself to guide me and show me the way and all I have to do is follow. It is that simple.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Nobody's any better than anyone else. We're all just trying to stay away from a drink. The God that I was looking for, over here, over there; in some guy, the right motorcycle, the best tattoo. And all the time it was right here inside. And it's hope, and I have it every day if I choose to look for it. And you have it too, you have it right inside of yourself. I know that sounds like an after school special like happy little Care Bears or something, but it's really true. And you never have to drink again if you find that little light inside yourself. You are so set. It's really excellent. Sobriety rocks. - Gail.
bluidkiti
07-11-2015, 09:02 AM
July 12
Daily Reflections
GIVING UP CENTER STAGE, p.202
For without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all.
. . Without it, they cannot live to much useful purpose, or, in
adversity, be able to summon the faith that can meet any emergency.
12 & 12, p.70
Why do I balk at the word "humility"? I am not humbling myself
toward other people, but toward God, as I understand Him.
Humbly means "to show submissive," and by being humble I
realize I am not the center of the universe. When I was drinking, I
was consumed by pride and self-centeredness. I felt the entire world
revolved around me, that I was master of my destiny. Humility
enables me to depend more on God to help me overcome obstacles, to
help me with my own imperfections, so that I may grow spiritually. I
must solve more difficult problems to increase my proficiency and, as
I encounter life's stumbling blocks, I must learn to overcome them
through God's help. Daily communion with God demonstrates my
humility and provides me with the realization that an entity more
powerful than I is willing to help me if I cease trying to play God
myself.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Today is ours. Let us live today as we believe God wants us to
live. Each day will have a new pattern which we cannot foresee.
But we can open each day with a quiet period in which we say a little
prayer, asking God to help us through the day. Personal contact with
God, as we understand Him, will from day to day bring us nearer
to an understanding of His will for us. At the close of the day, we
offer Him thanks for another day of sobriety. A full, constructive
day has been lived and we are grateful. Am I asking God each day
for strength and thanking Him each night?
Meditation For The Day
If you believe that God's grace has saved you, then you must believe
that He is meaning to save you yet more and keep you in the way that
you should go. Even human rescuers would not save you from
drowning only to place you in other deep and dangerous waters.
Rather, they would place you on dry land, there to restore you.
God, who is your rescuer, would certainly do this and even more.
God will complete the task He sets out to do. He will not throw you
overboard, if you are depending on Him.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may trust God to keep me in the way. I pray that I may
rely on Him not to let me go.
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As Bill Sees It
The Spiritual Alibi, p. 193
Our first attempts at inventories are apt to prove very unrealistic. I
used to be a champ at unrealistic self-appraisal. On certain occasions,
I wanted to look only at the part of my life which seemed good. Then I
would greatly exaggerate whatever virtues I supposed I had attained.
Next I would congratulate myself on the grand job I was doing in A.A.
Naturally this generated a terrible hankering for still more
"accomplishments," and still more approval. I was falling straight
back into the pattern of my drinking days. Here were the same old
goals--power, fame, and applause. Besides, I had the best alibi
known--the spiritual alibi. The fact that I really did have a spiritual
objective made this utter nonsense seem perfectly right.
Grapevine, June 1961
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Walk In Dry Places
Pats on the back
Self-esteem
Recovery from a compulsive illness such as alcohoism often brings "pats on the back." This praise is a welcome change from the criticism our problems once raised.
We should accept such pats on the back graciously, but without taking the personal credit this sort of praise implies. We can become addicted to praise seeking, and we may even invite it as a way of building up self-esteem.
Moreover, much of our challenge is still ahead of us. The real victory may be in learning how to live after we've established our initial freedom. We learn that all human beings must face issues such as boredom and pain, which we tried to avoid with our drinking. We may get few pats on the back for our success in this everyday living, but our healthier lifestyle is reward enough.
If I receive praise today, I'll acknowledge it graciously, knowing that such praise is not necessary for my well-being.
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Keep It Simple
Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.---Irene Peter
Our life changed a lot when we stopped drinking and using other drugs. But this is only a start. We need to go further.
Our old attitudes can kill us, even if we aren't drinking or drugging any more. This is called a "dry drunk." If we're on a dry drunk, we've changed the way we act without changing the way we think.
Our program shows us how to change the way we think. And we change how we treat ourselves and others. We learn to live a new life based on love and care.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me guard against my old attitudes. Help me keep changing.
Action for the Day: I'll list four ways I've changed because I'm sober. I'll list four ways I haven't changed yet.
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Each Day a New Beginning
... those interested in perpetuating present conditions are always in tears about the marvelous past that is about to disappear, without having so much as a smile for the young future. --Simone de Beauvoir
Hanging on to any moment, once it's gone, deadens us to the joys and lessons of the present. We must learn to let go, to let go of persons, painful situations, and even meaningful experiences. Life goes on, and the most fruitful lesson before us is to move with the vibrations, be in tune with them.
Being open to the present is our only chance for growth. These experiences today in our lives beckon us forward along the path meant for us. We are not guaranteed only joy today. But we are promised security. We may not be free of twinges of fear or confusion, but we can learn to trust even in the midst of adversity. We can remember that power greater than ourselves whenever and wherever our steps are uncertain.
Dwelling, as we are wont to do, on our rebuffs, our rejections, invites further criticism. But neither should we dwell on past joys. Attention to now and to the persons here, now, is the only rightful response to life. Not being here, now, invites others to turn away, just as we have turned away.
I will celebrate the thrill of the present, squeeze the moments of today, and trust the outcome to God.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover. You can easily find some by asking a few doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals. They will be only too glad to assist you. Don’t start out as an evangelist or reformer. Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much from them if you wish, but it happens that because of your own drinking experience you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. So cooperate; never criticize. To be helpful is our only aim.
p. 89
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
As someone in A.A. said to me once upon a time, there is nothing worse than a confused psychiatrist.
p. 303
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
A.A. experience has taught us we cannot live alone with our pressing problems and the character defects which cause or aggravate them. If we have swept the searchlight of Step Four back and forth over our careers, and it has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember, if we have come to know how wrong thinking and action
have hurt us and others, then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever. We have to talk to somebody about them.
p. 55
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"It is a rough road that leads to the heights of greatness."
--Seneca
"If one asks for success and prepares for failure, he will get the
situation he has prepared for."
--Florence Shinn
Blessed are they that have not seen and yet have believed.
--American Proverb
Faith is a knowledge within the heart, beyond the reach of proof.
--Kahil Gibran
"When we surrender to God, we let go of our attachment to how
things happen on the outside, and we become more concerned with
what happens on the inside."
--Marianne Williamson
Change your thoughts and you change your world.
--Vincent Norman Peale
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
VIOLENCE
"Violence is counter-productive
and produces changes of a sort
you don't want. It is a very
dangerous instrument and can
destroy those who wield it."
--John Gardner
I believed I wasn't violent when I drank but that is not true; I
wasn't physically violent but I used emotional and mental violence. I
did not hit, fight or mutilate people with my hands, but I could tear a
person apart with my tongue. My sarcasm and criticism made people
cry, feel demoralized and useless. Violence always removes the
"dignity" from man -- and I did this with my mouth!
Today I try to practice tolerance and patience, I count to ten, and
when I do lose my temper and hurt a person unfairly or unnecessarily,
I apologize. In my sobriety the anger, hate and need to hurt is
slowly going. I am progressively getting better a day at a time.
Teacher, let me offer the hand of peace, not the fist of violence.
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"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God."
Ephesians 2:8
Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith.
1 Corinthians 16:13
"Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should
always pray and not give up..."
Luke 18:1
"Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be
filled with the Spirit."
Ephesians 5:18
"My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your
word."
Psalm 119:28
"Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life
according to your word."
Psalm 119:37
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Daily Inspiration
Turn to God's love when you become doubtful or discouraged. Lord, Your love for me is so great that with this knowledge I am able to face my biggest challenges without stress.
Never forget that home is Heaven and life on earth is only temporary. Lord, may I live with deep awareness of my spiritual nature and live a life of truth.
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NA Just For Today
Patience
"We were trapped by our need for the instant gratification that drugs gave us."
Basic Text, pp.24-25
"I want what I want, and I want it now!" That's about as patient as most of us ever got in our active addiction. The obsession and compulsion of our disease gave us a "one-track" way of thinking; when we wanted something, that's all we thought about. And the drugs we took taught us that instant gratification was never more than a dose away. It's no wonder that most of us came to Narcotics Anonymous with next to no patience.
The problem is, we can't always get what we want whenever we want it. Some of our wishes are pure fantasy; if we think about it, we'll realize we have no reason to believe those wishes will be fulfilled in our lifetimes. We probably can't even fulfill all our realistic desires; we certainly can't fulfill them all at once. In order to acquire or achieve some things, we will have to sacrifice others.
In our addiction we sought instant gratification, squandering our resources. In recovery we must learn to prioritize, sometimes denying the gratification of some desires in order to fulfill more important long-term goals. To do so requires patience. To find that patience, we practice our program of recovery, seeking the kind of full-bodied spiritual awakening that will allow us to live and enjoy life on life's terms.
Just for today: Higher Power, help me discover what's most important in my life. Help me learn patience, so that I can devote my resources to the important things.
pg. 202
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
We love the things we love for what they are. --Robert Frost
Once there was a little girl who had a stuffed frog named Jeremy. Jeremy went everywhere with the girl--to imaginary picnics with her other dolls, to school, on trips, and, once, even into the bathtub! Every night, Jeremy slept cradled in her arms.
Over time, Jeremy grew old and tattered. He had lost an eye, and he limped because the girl used to use one of his legs as a handle, and it had gotten crushed. His nose was a little mangled too, from being dragged on the ground.
But the girl loved that frog, no matter how bedraggled he looked. And he never did anything. He was just always there. He was just Jeremy, and she loved him for that.
Today, that girl is a young woman and has outgrown childish things. But in her bedroom, you'll still find Jeremy, tattered and repaired, asleep on her bed. She still loves him dearly, for what he is.
Who do I love, and why?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If you keep on saying things are going to be bad, you have a good chance of being a prophet. --Isaac Bashevis Singer
Many of us have the habit of taking a negative outlook on whatever comes along. We don't believe things will work out for us; we don't think we will have a good day; we can't accept our friends' warm feelings. To follow this gloomy path is a strange distortion of faith - it is faith in the negative. Any forecast, whether hopeful or pessimistic, is a step into the unknown. So why do we choose the dark one?
We get a payoff for our pessimism, which keeps us hooked. It creates misery, but serves our demand for control. There is more risk in being open to something positive because we cannot force positive things to occur. We can only be open to them and believe in the possibility. But when we predict the negative and expect only bad things, we squelch many good things or overlook them. Then we say, "I knew it would be this way," and in our misery we satisfy our self-centered craving to be in charge. When we surrender our need to be in control, we are more open and welcoming of the good things that come our way.
Today. I will be open to the good that is around me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
... those interested in perpetuating present conditions are always in tears about the marvelous past that is about to disappear, without having so much as a smile for the young future. --Simone de Beauvoir
Hanging on to any moment, once it's gone, deadens us to the joys and lessons of the present. We must learn to let go, to let go of persons, painful situations, and even meaningful experiences. Life goes on, and the most fruitful lesson before us is to move with the vibrations, be in tune with them.
Being open to the present is our only chance for growth. These experiences today in our lives beckon us forward along the path meant for us. We are not guaranteed only joy today. But we are promised security. We may not be free of twinges of fear or confusion, but we can learn to trust even in the midst of adversity. We can remember that power greater than ourselves whenever and wherever our steps are uncertain.
Dwelling, as we are wont to do, on our rebuffs, our rejections, invites further criticism. But neither should we dwell on past joys. Attention to now and to the persons here, now, is the only rightful response to life. Not being here, now, invites others to turn away, just as we have turned away.
I will celebrate the thrill of the present, squeeze the moments of today, and trust the outcome to God.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Fear of Abandonment
"Where are you, God? Where did you go?"
So many people have gone away. We may have felt so alone so much. In the midst of our struggles and lessons, we may wonder if God has gone away too.
There are wondrous days when we feel God's protection and presence, leading and guiding each step and event. There are gray, dry days of spiritual barrenness when we wonder if anything in our life is guided or planned. Wondering if God knows or cares.
Seek quiet times on the gray days. Force discipline and obedience until the answer comes, because it will.
"I have not gone away child. I am here, always. Rest in me, in confidence. All in your life is being guided and planned, each detail. I know, and I care. Things are being worked out as quickly as possible for your highest good. Trust and be grateful. I am right here. Soon you will see, and know."
Today, I will remember that God has not abandoned me. I can trust that God is leading, guiding, directing, and planning in love each detail of my life.
I am at choice today. I accept responsibility of my life with a new sense of maturity, confidence and even excitement. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Let the Universe Lead the Way
Feel and see how the life force, the heartbeat of the universe, leads you on, guides you, takes you on the way. Yes, there are times when we need to march forward, muster up our willpower, and grind through the motions. But those times are transitory. And that’s not the magical way we’re living now. Even when we stop, doubt, wonder, get tired and confused, the universe is there to revitalize us, move us along our path and lead the way.
If you’re tired, rest. If you’re sad,cry. If you’re thirsty, take a long cold drink of water. If you feel hopeless, feel that. But know it’s just for the moment. If you feel confused, feel that. Feel it until clarity, desire, hope, and meaning break through. You don’t have to trudge through on willpower, not any longer. You do not have to push your way through.
Rest until you feel healed, then gently go forward. Let the universe assist you. Open your eyes, the eyes of your soul, and see where to go. Feel where to go. Sense what to do next. See how the magical power of the universe carries you along, even when you get tired, even when you get confused. You are connected– to yourself, to the universal force, to God.
Quiet the chatter of your mind. Renew your body. Replenish your soul. Take in all the healing energy of the world around you.
Then let the universe lead the way.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Honor your emotions
Inside me is a wheel, constantly turning from sadness to joy, from exultation to depression, from happiness to melancholy. Like the flowers, today’s full bloom of joy will fade and wither into despondency, yet I will remember that as today’s dead flower carries the seal of tomorrow’s bloom, so, too, does today’s sadness carry the seed of tomorrow’s joy.
–Og Mandino, The Greatest Salesman in the World
Honor your emotions, they are an important part of you. They hold your connection to love, passion, joy, healing, and intuition.
Not having emotions would make us cold robots. Emotions are part of the glory of being human, and they’re our connection to our hearts.
Respect and treasure your emotional self. Learn to cherish your variety of emotions.
God, help me become the passionate, vibrant human being you created me to be. Help me feel all my emotions, and embrace the glory of being alive.
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In God’s Care
The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.
~~Muhammad Ali
We can be changed, sometimes profoundly, by seemingly insignificant events – provided we are willing to be touched by them and the people involved. How we thought and what we dreamed for in our youth was fitting for that time and place. But those thoughts and dreams may be too small for us today. Now, each moment calls for new dreams, shaped daily by the events and people we open ourselves to.
We’re most fully alive when we’re learning, changing, and growing. Not a moment passes that isn’t rich with possibilities for insights and growth. Each encounter with people who cross our path offers us the chance for a deeper connection with our Higher Power. When we become entrapped by rigid attitudes, our spirit withers. God has given us life as a gift that wee must open. It’s never too late to begin the clebration.
I will think of my life as celebration today, with me and the people around me as God’s guests of honor.
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Day By Day
Knowing our Higher Power
A good understanding of our Higher Power may be necessary for some of us, but we don’t need to get stuck on any image. All we have to do is become willing to believe that a power greater than ourselves will help us get clean and sober.
Electricity works the same after a course in electronics as it did before the course. Like-wise, our Higher Power works the same for us before we understand how it operates. It gets down to this simple idea: It’s less important that we understand God than believe God understands us.
Do I have faith in my Higher Power?
Higher Power, help me accept the fact that understanding your ways is less important than believing you are present in my life today.
I will apply my faith in my Higher Power today by…
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Food for Thought
Growing Up
There is no magic. Nothing – be it person, place, or thing – is going to give us instant and permanent gratification. We keep thinking in the back of our mind that there is some way we can manipulate life into granting us all of our desires, even when they contradict each other.
When we seriously and with honest effort work our way through the Twelve Steps, we begin to grow up emotionally and spiritually. Abstinence from compulsive overeating makes this growth possible. It is not easy, but it is definitely worth the effort.
Acceptance and renunciation are necessary if we are to live with satisfaction in the real world. Grandiose illusions are of no help. We come to understand that certain foods, emotions, and attitudes are not for us if we are to maintain our sanity.
There is no magic, but there is a Power greater than ourselves. Who is directing our growth.
Grant me the willingness to grow up.
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The Reciprocal Flow of Abundance
Giving without Expectations by Madisyn Taylor
It is in the act of giving that we find joy, without the expectation of anything in return.
Since giving and receiving are so intimately intertwined in our lives, we often expect that we can attract abundance by simply conducting ourselves in an openhanded fashion. Yet we find ourselves wallowing in disappointment when our ample generosity is not met with the expected results. The answer to this quandary lies in the expectations that, in part, initially prompted us to give. Though our intention is likely pure, we can unintentionally mar the beautiful experience of giving by focusing on what we will eventually receive in return. When we let go of the notion that we deserve to receive gifts based on giving gifts, bounty can once again flow freely in and out of our lives.
When the gifts you give are laden down with expectations, they cease to be gifts and become units of exchange that you are, in effect, trading for some reward. Thus, the reciprocal laws of the universe err on the side of the giver who shares for the sake of sharing. You may have seen this simple truth at work in your own experience, perhaps when life’s busyness prevented you from spending too much time contemplating the results your charitable actions would ultimately have on the lives of others. It was likely then that you received the greatest gifts in return for your kindness. If you have trouble divesting yourself of your expectations, you may need to reflect upon the root of your inability to act in the true spirit of giving. Each time you make a gift, whether spiritual or tangible, ask yourself if there is something you hope to receive in return. You may be surprised to discover that you expect to be repaid with an easy life, financial windfalls, or opportunities.
To integrate this most selfless form of generosity into your life, you will have to let go of your need to be in control. Accepting that while like inevitably attracts like, it typically does so on an unobservable timetable. This can help you stop weighing the gifts you give against those you have received. Giving eventually becomes a profound joy that stands alone, separate from any and all conditions, and you will learn to appreciate the flow of reciprocal abundance as a gift in and of itself. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
In many aspects the Fellowship of The Program is like a reasonably happy cruise ship or, in time of trouble, like a convoy. But in the long run each of us must chart his or her own course through life. When the seas are smooth, we may become careless. By neglecting Step Ten, we may get out of the habit of checking our position. If we’re mindful of Step Ten, however, then we rarely go so far wrong that we can’t make a few corrections and get back on course again. Do I realize that regular practice of Step Ten can help me determine what other step is indicated to bring me into a happier frame of mind and into serenity?
Today I Pray
May step Ten be a sextant by which I read my whereabouts at sea, so that I can correct my course, re chart it if I am heading for shallow places. May I keep in mind that, if it weren’t for an all-knowing Captain, and the vigilance of my fellow crew members, this ship could be adrift and I could easily panic.
Today I Will Remember
To steer by a steady star.
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One More Day
There is a certain state of health that does not allow us to understand everything; and perhaps illness shuts us off from certain truths; but health shuts us off just as effectively from others.
– Andre Gide
When we were healthy, it was hard imagining what someone in poor health was going through. We could sympathize — even empathize — but we were insulated from the reality because we had no personal experience with illness.
Now, our diminished health allows us to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. Many of our friends and family don’t always know how to act toward us or what to say. They’re the ones who may be uneasy about facing our world. We can help them because we know what they are experiencing.
I will be compassionate to my loved ones as they strive to help and understand.
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One Day At A Time
APATHY
“The world is a dangerous place to live;
not because of the people who are evil,
but because of the people who don't do anything about it.”
Albert Einstein
In my life as an addict, I found myself deteriorating in every way possible. I was spiritually hungry, emotionally bereft, and physically a mess. I stopped caring about people, places or things. I was apathetic to such a degree that I no longer cared about anything.
That gradually changed when I embraced the Twelve Steps. I began to open my eyes to the world around me ~ the world I had shut out. The more I worked the Steps, the more I saw the reality of things. I became less selfish and began to try to make a difference -- not only in my own life, but also in the lives of those I cared about. I found myself loving more. I found I was once again capable of having compassion.
I am no longer afraid to speak out when I see misdeeds. I don't cower before those who would do harm to others. I embrace the good and the bad in this world I call home.
One day at a time...
I will do my part in making the world a better place. I will listen and hear what my Higher Power has in mind for me.
~ Mari
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When working with a man and his family, you should take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. But urge upon a man's family that he has been a very sick person and should be treated accordingly. You should warn against arousing resentment or jealousy. You should point out that his defects or character are not going to disappear over night. Show them that he has entered upon a period of growth. Ask them to remember, when they are impatient, the blessed fact of his sobriety. - Pg. 100 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The world is not consistent, you are not consistent, and those around you will not always be consistent. We don't have to be. We only have to remember not to use mind-affecting chemicals right now and our world will improve.
When inconsistency scares or annoys me, let me understand that to remain always constant would be like a plastic plant, never to grow and change!
Inner Hearing, Inner Sight
Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I give myself the gift of listening.
I will trust my inner voice.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
No one wants to hear the Sermon on the Mount or Zen philosophy when they're trying to save their ass. They want to know what to do--not hear words of wisdom. Tell them what you did.
I do not get so spiritual, that I am of no earthly value.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you think you have a good idea you might want to get second opinion from your sponsor.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am at choice today. I accept the responsibilities of my life with a new sense of maturity, confidence and even excitement.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I went through life waiting for a space ship to land and a voice to say: 'Sorry, dropped you on the wrong planet, time to go home now.' - Trip S.
bluidkiti
07-12-2015, 07:10 AM
July 13
Daily Reflections
HUMILITY IS A GIFT, p.203
As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a
Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all
humility, a desire to seek and do God's will, was missing.
12 & 12, p.72
When I first came to A.A., I wanted to find some of the elusive
quality called humility. I didn't realize I was looking for humility
because I thought it would help me get what I wanted, and I would
do anything for others if I thought God would somehow reward me
for it. I try to remember now that the people I meet in the course
of my day are as close to God as I am ever going to get while on
this earth. I need to pray for knowledge of God's will today, and see
how my experience with hope and pain can help other people; if I can
do that, I don't need to search for humility, it has found me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Before alcoholics come into A.A., they are "flying blind." But A.A.
gives them a directed beam in the A.A. program. As long as they
keep on this beam, the signal of sobriety keeps coming through. If
they have a slip, the signal is broken. If they swing off course into
drunkenness, the signal stops. Unless they regain the A.A.
directed beam, they are in danger of crashing against the
mountain peak of despair. Am I on the beam?
Meditation For The Day
Be expectant. Constantly expect better things. Believe that what
God has in store for you is better than anything you ever had
before. The way to grow old happily is to expect better things
right up to the end of your life and even beyond that. A good life is
a growing expanding life, with ever-widening horizons, an
ever-greater circle of friends and acquaintances, and an
ever-greater opportunity for usefulness.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may await with complete faith for the next good thing
in store for me. I pray that I may always keep an expectant
attitude toward life.
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As Bill Sees It
The Obsession and the Answer, p. 194
The idea that somehow, some day, he will control and enjoy his
drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The
persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates
of insanity or death.
********************************
Alcoholism, not cancer was my illness, but what was the difference?
Was not alcoholism also a consumer of body and mind? Alcoholism
took longer to do its killing, but the result was the same. So, I decided,
if there was a great Physician who could cure alcoholic sickness, I had
better seek Him at once.
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 30
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 61
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Walk In Dry Places
Solving Problems is the Proof
Spiritual Guidance.
Although we try, it's almost impossible for us to use logic to prove the existence (for nonexistence) of God. Our best proof of God's activity in our lives has to come from personal experience.
That's the message of the 12 Step movement: God has done for us what we could not do for ourselves. We cannot be responsible for setting simmering religious and doctrinal issues that have been around for centuries. We can find our own help by following the example of others in the 12 Step program.
When spiritual guidance brings answers and solutions, we don't have to defend or justify our belief in our Higher Power. What better proof do we need than evidence that the program does work?
I'll follow my Higher Power today and then let the results speak for themselves.
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Keep It Simple
A brother may not be a friend, but a friend will always be a brother. ---Benjamin Franklin
Many of us come from families that aren't very healthy for us. Many families have lots of love but aren't able to show it. Maybe our parents argued or drank to much. When we share our recovery with them, they may not seem happy with us. They may be doing the best they can, but they don't understand our new way of life.
We can have the love we wanted, but it might not come from our family. We can choose healthy friends to be our new "family." Some friends may seem like the sister or brother we always wanted.
A sponsor can give us advice we never got from our parents. We can have a full, healthy "family life" after all.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me choose good friend who will help me to be the best that I can be.
Action for the Day: The best way to have a friend is to be a friend. What will I do today to be a friend.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The trouble is not that we are never happy--it is that happiness is so episodical. --Ruth Benedict
Happiness is our birthright. The decision to be happy is ours to make, every day, when confronted with any experience. Too many of us grew up believing that life needed to be a certain way for us to be happy. We looked for the right lover, the right job, and the right dress. We looked outside of ourselves for the key to happiness. In time, we even looked to alcohol, drugs, and food perhaps--to no avail.
Happiness lies within. We must encourage it to spring forth. But first we need to believe that happiness is fully within our power. We must trust that the most difficult circumstances won't keep it from us when we have learned to tap the source within.
Life is a gift we are granted moment-by-moment. Let us be in awe of the wonder of it, and then revel in it. We can marvel at creation for a moment and realize how special we are to be participants. Happiness will overcome us if we let it. We can best show our gratitude for the wonder of this gift by smiling within and without.
That I am here is a wonderful mystery to which joy is the natural response. It is no accident that I am here.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
When you discover a prospect for Alcoholics Anonymous, find out all you can about him. If he does not want to stop drinking, don’t waste time trying to persuade him. You may spoil a later opportunity. This advice is given for his family also. They should be patient, realizing they are dealing with a sick person.
p. 90
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
I will never forget the first meeting that I attended. There were five people present, including me. At one end of the table sat our community butcher. At the other side of the table sat one of the carpenters in our community, and at the farther end of the table sat the man who ran the bakery, while on one side sat my friend who was a mechanic. I recall, as I walked into that meeting, saying to myself, "Here I am, a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons, a Fellow of the International College of Surgeons, a diplomatic of one of the great specialty boards in these United States, a member of the American Psychiatric Society, and I have to go to the butcher, the baker, and the carpenter to help make a man out of me!"
pp. 303-304
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
So intense, though, is our fear and reluctance to do this, that many A.A.'s at first try to bypass Step Five. We search for an easier way--which usually consists of the general and fairly painless admission that when drinking we were sometimes bad actors. Then, for good measure, we add dramatic descriptions of that part of our drinking behavior which our friends probably know about anyhow.
p. 55
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The chains of alcohol were to soft to feel till they were to hard to
break. --heard at a meeting
Pay attention to the little things. Sometimes the greatest rewards are
behind something small.
--unknown
The actions and comments of others can only "get to you" if YOU
allow them to.
--unknown
Love is caring for another human being and allowing them to be who
they are and make their own choices without any demand that they
meet yours.
--Vickie Dishner
Love is like a brilliantly glowing candle. If you step into its presence
and ignite your own candle from the flame, there is not less light, but
more.
We are not meant to hoard light, but to shine and share it by becoming
love in action.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
Newcomer or long-timer, we are all the same in our need for each other.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
DIGNITY
"To behave with dignity is
nothing less than to allow others
freely to be themselves."
--Sol Chaneles
I believe that ultimately I can only be responsible for me. It is
impossible for me to live another person's life. It is disrespectful to
assume the role of decision-maker for another adult human being.
People must have the freedom to grow and be themselves. Dignity is
affording people this freedom.
Today I can see how I continued to keep members of my family sick
by taking on a responsibility that was not mine. I can see how I was
not giving dignity to my family; I was unintentionally withholding
dignity from those I loved. People, especially family members,
must be given the freedom to express their hurts. They have a
responsibility to deal with their pain -- because it is theirs!
I pray that I may give to others the dignity I desire in my own life.
************************************************** *********
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
John 3:16
Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have
never forsaken those who seek you.
Psalm 9:10
I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and
will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.
Psalm 7:17
Freely you have received, freely give.
Matthew 10:8
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Daily Inspiration
Today is for living and giving because God's presence is in each of us always. Lord, may I truly live a full life because I am aware that You are unceasingly blessing me.
To have a great day isn't always doing what you like, but trying to like what you must do. Lord, today I will spruce up my attitude and have a great day no matter what my circumstances.
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NA Just For Today
Humility In Action
"If we are hurting, and most of us do from time to time, we learn to ask for help."
Basic Text, p.80
Sometimes recovery gets downright difficult. It can be even more difficult to get humble enough to ask for help. We think, "I have all this time clean. I should be better than this!" But the reality of recovery is simple: whether we have thirty days or thirty years clean, we must be willing to ask for help when we need it.
Humility is a common theme in our Twelve Steps. The program of Narcotics Anonymous is not about keeping up appearances. Instead, the program helps us get the most from our recovery. We must be willing to lay bare our difficulties if we expect to find solutions to problems that arise in our lives.
There's an old expression sometimes heard in Narcotics Anonymous: We can't save our face and our ass at the same time. It isn't easy to share in a meeting when we have a number of years clean only to dissolve into tears because life on life's terms has made us realize our powerlessness. But when the meeting ends and another member comes up and says, "You know, I really needed to hear what you had to say," we know that there is a God working in our lives.
The taste of humility is never bitter. The rewards of humbling ourselves by asking for help sweetens our recovery.
Just for today: If I need help, I will ask for it. I will put humility into action in my life.
pg. 203
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice. --William James
There are times when it's hard to make a decision. When we go to the fair, for instance, we may want to do more things than we have time for, so we don't know what plans to make. Waiting to decide until we see what the fair has to offer is one choice. Not deciding because we're afraid of what may happen is also a choice. We may find ourselves thinking so much about what could happen that we miss all the exciting things going on around us.
It's necessary to keep in mind that any course of action is a decision, but no decision is irreversible. We are free to do what we decide, and are freed by the awareness that whatever we do is based on our own decision and no one else's.
What important decisions shall I make without fear today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If I were to begin life again, I should want it as it was. I would only open my eyes a little more. --Jules Renard
Spiritual and emotional growth is a process of raising our awareness. Reflecting on our growth as men, before this program and after, we see different levels of consciousness. Some of us might say we weren't at all conscious of what it meant to be a man by the time we entered the adult world.
Now we are forming an awareness of manhood. We see ourselves more as recovering, caring, strong, vulnerable men in relationships with others. We have an increased sense that our actions make a difference as sons, as fathers, as husbands, lovers, and friends. Our increased understanding of ourselves makes it possible to fulfill our potentials for growth. It is not idle fantasy to imagine beginning life again because, in a sense, we have. In recovery, it seems we have begun life again, only with our eyes a little more open.
Help me live this day with all of my awareness.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The trouble is not that we are never happy--it is that happiness is so episodical. --Ruth Benedict
Happiness is our birthright. The decision to be happy is ours to make, every day, when confronted with any experience. Too many of us grew up believing that life needed to be a certain way for us to be happy. We looked for the right lover, the right job, and the right dress. We looked outside of ourselves for the key to happiness. In time, we even looked to alcohol, drugs, and food perhaps--to no avail.
Happiness lies within. We must encourage it to spring forth. But first we need to believe that happiness is fully within our power. We must trust that the most difficult circumstances won't keep it from us when we have learned to tap the source within.
Life is a gift we are granted moment-by-moment. Let us be in awe of the wonder of it, and then revel in it. We can marvel at creation for a moment and realize how special we are to be participants. Happiness will overcome us if we let it. We can best show our gratitude for the wonder of this gift by smiling within and without.
That I am here is a wonderful mystery to which joy is the natural response. It is no accident that I am here.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
God as We Understand God
God is subtle, but he is not malicious. --Albert Einstein
Recovery is an intensely spiritual process that asks us to grow in our understanding of God. Our understanding may have been shaped by early religious experiences or the beliefs of those around us. We may wonder if God is as shaming and frightening as people can be. We may feel as victimized or abandoned by God as we have by people from our past.
Trying to understand God may boggle our mind because of what we have learned and experienced so far in our life.
We can learn to trust God, anyway.
I have grown and changed in my understanding of this Power greater than myself. My understanding has not grown on an intellectual level, but because of what I have experienced since I turned my life and my will over to the care of God, as I understood, or rather didn't understand, God.
God is real. Loving. Good. Caring. God wants to give us all the good we can handle. The more we turn our mind and heart toward a positive understanding of God, the more God validates us.
The more we thank God for who God is, who we are, and the exact nature of our present circumstances, the more God acts in our behalf.
In fact, all along, God planned to act in our behalf.
God is Creator, Benefactor, and Source. God has shown me, beyond all else, that how I come to understand God is not nearly as important as knowing that God understand me.
Today, I will be open to growing in my understanding of my Higher Power. I will be open to letting go of old, limiting, and negative beliefs about God. No matter how I understand God, I will be grateful that God understands me.
I can go through anything a day at a time, a moment at a time with the faith and the knowledge that my Higher Power is guiding me to peace and security. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
See the Snow on the Desert
I drove through Arizona’s petrified forest, a land where dinosaurs once roamed, then headed across the painted desert. A light dusting of snow covered the sand and shrubs. I felt both awe and surprise at the scene nature had created.
Nature does many things. Tornados blow across the land. Hurricanes pound the shores. Bolts of lightning streak through the sky. Dust storms fill the air. Nature petrifies wood, turning trees into beautiful crystal rocks, glowing with brilliant red and orange fossilized patterns. Nature takes centuries to carve bridges out of stone, using only winds and rain and the flow of water from other rocks. And sometimes, she puts snow on the desert.
Many things happen in our lives. Some of them are probable, consequential. Some of them are flukes and seem to come out of the blue, from nowhere. All the events work into a pattern, helping to create us, create our path through life, create our destiny. Sometimes we’re influenced greatly by a traumatic storm. Other times seemingly chance occurrences can change the entire pattern and course of our lives.
We don’t have to understand everything. Maybe we aren’t supposed to. We don’t have to be prepared for all the storms. Sometimes the greatest learning occurs when we’re caught off guard, by surprise.
Weather the storms. Let them pass. Keep your balance, as best you’re able. Remember to be flexible and sway with the winds like the tall trees in the forest. Trust the flukes,too, those moments when it snows on the desert. Let destiny have its way with you.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say it like it is
Acknowledge your pain. Then you can begin to identify the source of it, and in identifying, you can begin to heal. When we open ourselves to emotions, we don’t just get the good ones, like happiness or relief. Feelings are a package deal. We get the entire emotional range.
Pain and suffering are part of the experience of being alive. Things go wrong. Lovers leave us, parents and sometimes children die. We fall, we fail. Don’t hide from your pain. Don’t bury it under a shell of drugs, alcohol, or shallow achievement. If you hurt, then hurt.
Recognize what you’re going through. Then learn to tell it like it is.
God, help me acknowledge the pain in my life instead of trying to mask it with mood-altering substances or mindless busywork. Teach me to say what hurts. Show me what it is that I need to do to heal; then give me the strength to do that.
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Food for Thought
Living from Within
We are often deluded into thinking that we will find our pattern for living from someone else. We look for models to imitate. Although we do learn from others, it is from within that our most sure guidance comes. Since each one of us is unique, there is no other human being who can give us an example to copy exactly.
OA recognizes individual differences and the need we each have to discover our true self. By sharing our experience, strength, and hope, we are able to develop our unique potential as individuals. We are each free to take from and give to the group, according to our own unique needs and abilities.
If we are to receive the strength, which our Higher Power wants us to have, we need to listen to the inner voice that tells us what is right for us at any given moment. The most sure guidance comes from within.
May I listen to Your voice.
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In God’s Care
The real gift of love is self-disclosure.
~~John Powell
It’s natural to want to put our best face forward. We like people to see us as we want to be, not as we are. We prefer to be judged as witty, clever, kind, and perceptive, never as small-minded, selfish, weak, and critical.
Yet, it is not until we reveal our liabilities that people are truly able to see our assets. When we pretend to be without fault, we come off as phony. As we discover in doing the Fifth Step, the more we disclose our shortcomings, the more people are able to trust us.
So it is with God. God wants us without our pretenses, wants to hear our secret desires, our deep-seated grievances, our shameful thoughts. As we come clean, revealing our trueself, the barriers to love come down.
Today will not be afraid to reveal my weaknesses; self-disclosure opens the door to God’s love.
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Day By Day
Lacking power over others
When we look closely at our lives, we may realize that we have little power over others (as shocking as that may seem). Yet often our arrogance gets so blown out of proportion that we think our actions can get people high or keep them straight! Think of that!
We are so important to ourselves, we begin to think that we are that important to others. We seldom see that our affairs have about as much weight with others as theirs do with us – and that is often little.
Do I realize that I can manage no one?
Higher Power, help me realize that my power over others is actually slight and protect me from my own arrogance.
If I find myself trying to manage others today, I will…
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Connection
The Truth of Interdependence by Madisyn Taylor
Earth is home to a web of living things that are connected to each other through a kaleidoscope of relationships.
Picking a leaf off the ground and contemplating it as an object in and of itself is very inspiring. Its shape and color, the way it feels in your hand, its delicate veins and the stem that once held it fast to the branch of a tree—all of these qualities reveal a leaf to be a miniature work of natural art. As we contemplate this small object more deeply and consider where it came from and what purpose it has served, we find that the leaf is one small but essential part of a system that harnesses the energy of the sun, plumbs the depths of the earth, and in the process brings into being the oxygen many living things rely on to live.
A leaf transforms the elements of its environment—sunlight, carbon dioxide, rain—into nourishment for its tree. This beautiful, nearly weightless, ephemeral piece of nature is a vital conduit to the branch that is a conduit to the trunk that is a conduit to the roots of the tree. The roots, in turn, draw nourishment from the earth to feed the trunk, the branches, and the leaves. The living beings that inhale the oxygen that comes from this process exhale the carbon dioxide that feeds the leaves through which the tree is fed. It is difficult to know where one cycle ends and another one begins.
One of the many gifts that nature offers us is a clear demonstration of the interdependence between all living things. The person who exhales the carbon dioxide, the clouds that produce the rain, the sun that gives light, the leaf that transforms all these things into sustenance for a tree—not one of these could survive without being part of this cycle.
Each living being is dependent upon other living things for its survival. When we look at the world, we see that this is not a place where different beings survive independently of one another. Earth is home to a web of living things that are connected to each other through a spinning kaleidoscope of relationships. We need each other to survive and thrive. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
These days, I go to meetings to listen for the similarities between myself and others in The Program — not the differences. And when I look for the similarities, it’s amazing how many I find, particularly in the area of feelings. Today I go to meetings thinking that I’m here not because of anyone Else’s addictions, but because of mine and , most importantly, what my addiction did to my spirit anybody. I’m here because there’s no way I can stay free of my addiction by myself. I need The Program and my Higher Power. Am I becoming less harsh in my judgments of others?
Today I Pray
May I stay alert as I listen, just one more time, to Jack or Jill or Fred or Sam or Martha go through his or her tale of woe or weal. May I find, when I listen with the whole-hearted attention I want to be able to give, that each has something to offer me to add to my own life-tale. May I be struck once again by our sameness. May each sameness draw us nearer to each others needs.
Today I Will Remember
In sameness, there is strength.
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One More Day
We often make self-defeating choices because we are unenlightened about our needs. We pick the opposite of what we really need because we don’t know what we need.
– Lila Swell
Sometimes we may repeatedly engage in self-defeating behaviors. Poor work habits can lead to being fired and being defeated again. Overeating causes obesity, health issues, and poor image, which may lead to fad dieting and more failure. Until lightening strikes, until we finally realize that we are defeating our deepest needs — spiritual and emotional — we plod along on the same path.
The direction of our behavior changes when we see what our needs are and that they are the same for everyone. we all need love, compassion, and the opportunity to love others, and we can satisfy those needs in healthy ways.
I’ll make positive choices for myself today.
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One Day At A Time
SERVICE
“I do not know what path in life you will take,
but I do know this:
If, on that path, you do not find a way to serve,
you will never be happy.”
Albert Schweitzer
Working the Twelfth Step means carrying the message of recovery to those who still suffer from our disease. To be a messenger of hope has to be the highest form of service we can provide to our fellow compulsive eaters.
Giving service means more than volunteering to set chairs up at a meeting, tidying up afterwards, or giving another person a ride to the meeting. Giving service means living a triumphant program every single day. It's taking a telephone call from someone who's having a rough day … and it's making an outreach call even when I don't feel like it. It's not hiding my slips in abstinence, and it sure isn't wallowing in my misery. It's getting up and moving on. It's presenting a positive view of the program.
We don't recruit members to recovery; we attract them by our example. If I don't put a positive face on my program, I can't expect a fellow-sufferer to consider the Twelve Steps as a way to recover from the disease of compulsive overeating. I know this program works -- and others won't know it unless I show them that it does.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will serve by living a triumphant program.
~ JAR
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its worst aspect. But we aren't a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world's troubles on our shoulders. - Pg. 132 - The Family Afterward
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Compulsive behavior is characterized by the need to be better than, sooner than, bigger then, more than. This creates pressure which creates stress, which for us creates danger! That is why we take the slogan 'Easy Does It,' seriously.
Help me to enjoy the journey, slow down and not expect five years of recovery in five weeks.
The Treasures Within
Within me is the perfect life waiting to awaken. The gifts I seek are already within me. A deep pool of awareness and aliveness is present all of the time but I am too distracted to know it. I get so lost in the superficial details and tasks of my life that I forget to live it, to drop down and contact the spirit that God has planted within me. It is the best kept secret that spirit lives within me, that the way in which I come in touch with my inner light is through letting the constant preoccupations of my mind float by, not taking them so seriously, not trying to control them. Today I realize that the gold is not in my ability to control my mind, the gold is in what lies beneath. What emerges when my mind, for a precious moment, is stilled.
Spirit is with me always
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
I never trust my tongue when my heart is bitter.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You get sober not with your head, but with you feet.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I can go through anything a day at a time, a moment at a time with the faith and the knowledge that my Higher Power is guiding me to peace and security.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If I don't stand for something, I'll fall for anything. - Anon.
bluidkiti
07-13-2015, 09:23 AM
July 14
Daily Reflections
A NOURISHING INGREDIENT, p.204
Where humility had formerly stood for a forced feeding on humble pie
it now begins to mean the nourishing ingredient which can give us
serenity.
12 & 12, p.74
How often do I focus on my problems and frustrations? When I am
having a "good day" these same problems shrink in importance
and my preoccupation with them dwindles. Wouldn't it be better if
I could find a key to unlock the "magic" of my "good days" for use
on the woes of my "bad days?"
I already have the solution! Instead of trying to run away from
my pain and wish my problems away, I can pray for humility!
Humility will heal the pain. Humility will take me out of myself.
Humility, that strength granted me by that "power greater than
myself," is mine for the asking! Humility will bring balance back
into my life. Humility will allow me to accept my humanness
joyously.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
One of the best things about the A.A. program is the peace of
mind and serenity that it can bring us. In our drinking days, we
had no peace of mind or serenity. We had the exact opposite, a
kind of turmoil and that "quiet desperation" we knew so well.
The turmoil of our drinking days was caused partly by our physical
suffering, the terrible hangovers, the cold sweats, the shakes and
the jitters. But it was caused even more by our mental suffering,
the loneliness, the feeling of inferiority, the lying, the remorse that
every alcoholic understands. Have I achieved more peace of
mind?
Meditation For The Day
Try to look for God's leading in all your personal relationships, in
all your dealings with other persons. God will help you to take
care of all your relationships with people, if you are willing to let
Him guide you. Rejoice that God can protect you and keep you from
temptation and failure. God can protect you in all situations during
the day, if you will rely on His strength and go forward. You should
feel that you are entering upon the stage of success in the proper
way of living. You should not doubt that better things are ahead
for you. Go forward unafraid because you feel deeply safe under
God's protection.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that God may protect and keep me as long as I try to serve
Him. I pray that I may go forward today unafraid.
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As Bill Sees It
The Language of the Heart, p. 195
Why, at this particular point in history, has God chosen to
communicate His healing grace to so many of us? Every aspect of this
global unfoldment can be related to a single crucial word. The word is
"communication." There has been a lifesaving communication among
ourselves, with the world around us, and with God.
>From the beginning, communication in A.A. has been no ordinary
transmission of helpful ideas and attitudes. Because of our kinship in
suffering, and because our common means of deliverance are effective
for ourselves only when constantly carried to others, our channels of
contact have always been charged with the language of the heart.
A.A. Today, pp. 7-8
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Walk In Dry Places
Self-esteem in responsible work
self-confidence.
"Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might," goes an ancient saying. However long ago this was said, it applies to our work here and now.
Part of recovery lies in doing useful and satisfying work. We can't wait until the "perfect" job appears. Our success will come in doing the very best we can in our present situation. If we're unemployed, we can still be useful and active in ways that will help us find the right situation.
And as we work for a living, we'll find that another important benefit of our work will be greater self-esteem. We'll have more respect for ourselves as we contiue to be both productive and active.
Whatever my job is, I'll give it my best today. I'll be grateful for having the opportunity to work productively.
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Keep It Simple
Most of the evils of life arise from man's being unable to sit still in a room.---Blaise Pascal
Our program teaches us to slow down. We learn to slow down by taking time out. During these times-outs, we look at our values and see if we're staying true to them.
Because of that, meditation is an important part of our program. It teaches us to slow down. Our Higher Power wants us to have fun and play. But we need to bring our Higher Power along. Remember, our Higher Power loves fun. We can have fun, but not at the expense of others.
Prayer for the Day: I pray for help so I can remember my values. Higher Power, teach me to have fun. Teach me to be true to You at the same time.
Action for the day: Today. I'll three times mischief has been good fun. I'll talk with a friend about the difference between trouble mischief and fun mischief.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Through spontaneity we are reformed into ourselves. Freed from handed-down frames of reference, spontaneity becomes the moment of personal freedom when we are faced with a reality, explore it, and act accordingly. --Viola Spolin
Living in the here and the now opens up untold possibilities for new growth. Our inner self is enticed in new directions when our attention is fully in the present. When our minds are still on last night's argument or tomorrow's board meeting, we wear blinders to the activity at hand. And God, as our teacher and protector, resides in this experience, in the hearts of these people present.
Every single moment has something for us. Maybe a new piece of information. A piece that solves a problem that's been puzzling us. Perhaps a chance to make a new friend, one who will be there in a time of need.
Letting go of yesterday frees us. We need not be burdened. It is gone. Our lives could be eased, so much, if we kept our focus on the experience at hand, where the problems we ponder have their solutions. Always.
I will greet today, skipping, smiling, ready for the answers, the truths, the directions meant only for me. The wonders of today will bless me.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If there is any indication that he wants to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him—usually his wife. Get an idea of his behavior, his problems, his background, the seriousness of his condition, and his religious leanings. You need this information to put yourself in his place, to see how you would like him to approach you if the tables were turned.
p. 90
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
Something else happened to me. This was such a new thought that I got all sorts of books on Higher Powers, and I put a Bible by my bedside, and I put a Bible in my car. It is still there. And I put a Bible in my locker at the hospital. And I put a Bible in my desk. And I put a Big Book by my night stand, and I put a Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions in my locker at the hospital, and I got books by Emmet Fox, and I got books by God-knows-who, and I got to reading all these things. And the first thing you know I was lifted right out of the A.A. group, and I floated higher and higher and even higher, until I was way up on a pink cloud, which is known as Pink Seven, and I felt miserable again. So I thought to myself, I might just as well be drunk as feel like this.
p. 304
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
But of the things which really bother and burn us, we say nothing. Certain distressing or humiliating memories, we tell ourselves, ought not be shared with anyone. These will remain our secret. Not a soul must ever know. We hope they'll go to the grave with us.
pp. 55-56
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A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes
your lips will not return.
--Jewish Proverb
Never let yesterday use up too much of today.
--unknown
I have always heard that I have to "give it away to keep it" but I
could never figure out what "it" was. Now I know what it is...it is
HOPE!
--unknown
If you judge people, you have no time to love them.
--Mother Teresa
Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn here. The
spiritual journey is the relinquishment - or unlearning - of fear and the
acceptance of love back into our hearts.
--Marianne Williamson
In every real man a child is hidden that wants to play.
--Friedrich Nietzsche
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
GREATNESS
"The ability to accept
responsibility is the measure of
the man."
--Roy L. Smith
I believe the greatest insight into my life is that I am responsible;
my responsibility is an important and dignified gift from God.
My responsibility reveals my involvement in God's creation, in my
life and my recovery from alcoholism. Greatness is in the choices I
make, and the choices come with God's gift of freedom. Human
beings are more than puppets on a string or automated machines.
We are creative creatures who carry the burden and joy of
responsibility.
Along with the acceptance of my alcoholism I also accepted the
responsibility to remain sober in my decisions and lifestyle: such is
greatness.
Thank You for giving me the responsibility to co-create with You.
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"Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand."
Isaiah 41:10
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
Isaiah 43:18
But Jesus remains a priest forever; his priesthood will never end.
Therefore he is able, once and forever, to save everyone who comes
to God through him. He lives forever to plead with God on their
behalf.
Hebrews 7:24-25
"Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in
harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the
lowly; never be conceited. Repay no one evil for evil, but take
thought for what is noble in the sight of all. If possible, so far as
it depends upon you, live peaceably with all."
Romans 12:15-18
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such
things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have
crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we
live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit."
Galatians 5:22-25
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Daily Inspiration
By helping others, we enrich our own life even more. Lord, help me be a little kinder today, reach out a little quicker, and share a few more smiles.
God has already prepared you for everything that He plans for you to do. Lord, You believe in me, therefore I can believe in me, and will have all the necessary confidence to succeed in what I will be doing today.
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NA Just For Today
An "Inside Job"
"Social acceptability does not equal recovery."
Basic Text, p.21
One of the first things that happens to many of us in recovery is that we start to look better. We get healthier; we bathe; we dress more appropriately. And without the goading of active addiction, many of us finally stop stealing, lying, and hustling. We start to look normal - just by removing the drugs.
Looking normal is very different than being normal. Acceptability in the eyes of the world is a benefit of recovery; it is not the same thing as recovery. We can enjoy the benefits of recovery, but we must take care to nurture their true source. Lasting recovery isn't found in acceptance from others, but in the inner growth set in motion by the Twelve Steps.
Just for today: I know that looking good isn't enough. Lasting recovery is an inside job.
pg. 204
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Happiness is not a matter of events; it depends upon the tides of the mind. --Alice Meyvell
It's thought that Abe Lincoln once said, "We're as happy as we make up our minds to be." In other words, we decide to be happy. Bad weather, lost toys, broken plans, even angry friends don't have to ruin our own happiness unless we let them. We're always in control of our own thoughts and feelings, and happiness is a feeling we can choose even when others around us have chosen to be angry or sad. Even when the day is gloomy and none of our plans are working out, we can still be cheerful if we decide to be. How lucky we are that someone else can't decide for us how to feel. We'd be nothing more than robots if that were true.
Am I ready to make this day a happy one?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life is not a "brief candle." It is a splendid torch that I want to make burn as brightly as possible before handing on to future generations. --George Bernard Shaw
We are men who have sought intensity. Some have said the extremes of our past were a kind of search for a Higher Power, although we went to self-defeating ends. There is no need now for us to give up our intense love of life. Serenity need not be bland. In facing ourselves, confronting our pain, surrendering our arrogant individualism, we are released to live the life we deeply desire.
What do men really want? We want to have true, lasting friendships with other men and women - to be at peace with our Higher Power and ourselves. We want to be fully aware in the present moments of our lives. We want to have some joy and to make a contribution to the world.
I am grateful that my torch burns brightly. I am finding what I really want.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Through spontaneity we are reformed into ourselves. Freed from handed-down frames of reference, spontaneity becomes the moment of personal freedom when we are faced with a reality, explore it, and act accordingly. --Viola Spolin
Living in the here and the now opens up untold possibilities for new growth. Our inner self is enticed in new directions when our attention is fully in the present. When our minds are still on last night's argument or tomorrow's board meeting, we wear blinders to the activity at hand. And God, as our teacher and protector, resides in this experience, in the hearts of these people present.
Every single moment has something for us. Maybe a new piece of information. A piece that solves a problem that's been puzzling us. Perhaps a chance to make a new friend, one who will be there in a time of need.
Letting go of yesterday frees us. We need not be burdened. It is gone. Our lives could be eased, so much, if we kept our focus on the experience at hand, where the problems we ponder have their solutions. Always.
I will greet today, skipping, smiling, ready for the answers, the truths, the directions meant only for me. The wonders of today will bless me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
We Are Lovable
Even if the most important person in your world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay. --Codependent No More
Do you ever find yourself thinking: How could anyone possibly love me? For many of us, this is a deeply ingrained belief that can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Thinking we are unlovable can sabotage our relationships with co-workers, friends, family members, and other loved ones. This belief can cause us to choose, or stay in, relationships that are less than we deserve because we don't believe we deserve better. We may become desperate and cling as if a particular person was our last chance at love. We may become defensive and push people away. We may withdraw or constantly overreact.
While growing up, many of us did not receive the unconditional love we deserved. Many of us were abandoned or neglected by important people in our life. We may have concluded that the reason we weren't loved was because we were unlovable. Blaming ourselves is an understandable reaction, but an inappropriate one. If others couldn't love us, or love us in ways that worked, that's not our fault. In recovery, we're learning to separate ourselves from the behavior of others. And we're learning to take responsibility for our healing, regardless of the people around us.
Just as we may have believed that we're unlovable, we can become skilled at practicing the belief that we are lovable. This new belief will improve the quality of our relationships. It will improve our most important relationship: our relationship with our self. We will be able to let others love us and become open to the love and friendship we deserve.
Today, God, help me be aware of and release any self-defeating beliefs I have about being unlovable. Help me begin, today, to tell myself that I am lovable. Help me practice this belief until it gets into my core and manifests itself in my relationships.
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Energize, Don't Tranquilize
Food is nourishment for our bodies, not a drug. When we overeat, we sap our energy and dull our responses. Too much food makes us lazy and lethargic. We should eat for energy, not oblivion.
If we have been using food as a narcotic to temporarily deaden the pain of living, then we need to learn other ways to cope. Much of our pain is needless, brought on by egocentric fears and demands. If we accept the fact that we cannot change another person's behavior, then we will not hurt ourselves by anger at what that person does.
At the same time, we will learn to remove ourselves from people and situations, which cause us unnecessary pain. We do not have to be martyrs! Abstinence gives us the energy to make positive changes.
A certain amount of pain, both physical and emotional, is unavoidable. Often, it accompanies growth. To tranquilize ourselves with food is to impede growth.
May I remember to eat for energy instead of oblivion.
Today I know that if I'm coming from good and love, then only good and love with happen. Today I know that what I give, I receive back. Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Touch the Eternal
My friend, a clerk in a local bookstore, and I were sitting on a bench one evening about twenty feet from the edge of the Pacific Ocean. A few stars and a tiny sliver of moon softly lit the sky. We were drinking coffee and staring at the sea. “I like the ocean,” my friend said. “I need to see it. It’s nature’s way of reminding us of eternity.
Sometimes, we zoom in on the details of our lives and all we can see is the small picture– the problems, issues, and specifics of what we need to do today. These moments are real. They’re the heart of our lives. It’s good to stay focused and attend to them, but sometimes we need to step back and see the big picture,too.
Visit places that remind you of eternity when you can. See the mountians. See the stars. Walk among the ancient redwoods. Stand at the ocean’s door. Let nature and life remind you of eternity in ways that speak to your soul.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Take care of yourself, no matter what
Some days, we wake up in the morning, and by the time we go to bed that evening, our life has twisted, changed in a way that we couldn’t predict and don’t want. Our worst fears have come true.
Life as we have known it will never be the same again. The problem isn’t just that this tragedy has come along and knocked our lives for a loop, although that alone would be enough. To complicate matters, we now know how vulnerable we are. And we wonder, in that vulnerability, if we can ever trust God, life, or ourselves again.
Many years ago, the founders of Alcoholics Anonymous, a spiritually based program designed to help alcoholics recover, cautioned people not to base sobriety and faith in God on the false notion that any person is immune from tragedy. They knew that life would continue to be life.
You are not alone, in your joy or in your sorrow. You may feel that way for a while. But soon you’ll begin to see that many others have experienced, surrendered to, and transcended a similar misfortune or loss. Your pain is important. But you’re not being singled out. Don’t use your misfortune to prove that you were right all along– you’re a victim of circumstance, fate, and God.
“God must really love me,” a young man said one day after walking away from a motorcycle accident that should have been tragic.
God loves all of us, whether we walk away pain-free or not.
Keep taking care of yourself, no matter what.
God, transform my pain into compassion for others and myself.
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In God’s Care
Each time we sense the possibility of a new direction in our lives, we are being given a chance to grow.
~~The Promise of a New Day, May 11
Change is the one constant in our life and yet it causes us the most unrest. We forget that change is growth and is good; it insures our emotional and spiritual evolution. It promises us the blessings that are ours to collect on this special journey through life.
We can better develop our acceptance of change by systematically recalling instances in the past when change, whether minor or profound, ushered in new understanding, greater strength and confidence; where we were thus able to handle the role we’d been given to play.
God inteds that we enlarge our capacity to love, to serve, and to understand. The changes we experience are the stair steps to this greater capacity.
Today I’ll smile if a changing current for the good beckons, knowing that it’s God’s invitation to a richer life
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Day By Day
Paying for freedom
Henry David Thoreau said, “The cost of a thing is the amount of what I will call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.” The price we paid for using alcohol and other drugs was our freedom. We finally realized that it costs too much to feel oblivious. The price became so high that we could no longer barter with mood-altering chemicals for our time and freeedom. The chemicals had absolute control.
Unless we wake up and pay the price for freedom-which is spiritual growth- we will be a slave to chemicals until death. But if we turn our lives over to God, all the liberty we need is made available to us.
Am I paying the right price for my freedom?
Higher Power, help me always to remember that the cost of using chemicals in my life is much too high.
Today I will pay for greater freedom by…
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Food for Thought
Energize, Don’t Tranquilize
Food is nourishment for our bodies, not a drug. When we overeat, we sap our energy and dull our responses. Too much food makes us lazy and lethargic. We should eat for energy, not oblivion.
If we have been using food as a narcotic to temporarily deaden the pain of living, then we need to learn other ways to cope. Much of our pain is needless, brought on by egocentric fears and demands. If we accept the fact that we cannot change another person’s behavior, then we will not hurt ourselves by anger at what that person does.
At the same time, we will learn to remove ourselves from people and situations, which cause us unnecessary pain. We do not have to be martyrs! Abstinence gives us the energy to make positive changes.
A certain amount of pain, both physical and emotional, is unavoidable. Often, it accompanies growth. To tranquilize ourselves with food is to impede growth.
May I remember to eat for energy instead of oblivion.
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The Weight of Objects
Clearing a Space for Change
We hold onto material objects because we think they make us feel secure, when in reality they are cluttering our lives.
In life, we tend to have an easier time acquiring possessions than we do getting rid of them. Just as we harbor emotional baggage that is difficult to let go of, our lives can tend to be filled with material objects that we may feel compelled to hold on to. Most people are not conscious of how much they own and how many of their possessions are no longer adding value to their life. They fiercely hold on to material objects because this makes them feel secure or comfortable. While it’s true that the ownership of “stuff” can make you feel good for awhile, it seldom satisfies the deep inner longings that nearly everyone has for fulfillment and satisfaction. It is only when we are ready to let go of our baggage and be vulnerable that it becomes possible to recognize the emotional hold that our possessions can have on us.
It’s not uncommon to hold on to material objects because we are attached to them or fear the empty spaces that will remain if we get rid of them. Giving away the souvenirs from a beloved voyage may feel like we are erasing the memory of that time in our life. We may also worry that our loved ones will feel hurt if we don’t keep the gifts they’ve given us. It’s easy to convince ourselves that unused possessions might come in handy someday or that parting with them will cause you emotional pain. However, when your personal space is filled with objects, there is no room for anything new to enter and stay in your life. Your collection of belongings may “protect” you from the uncertainties of an unknown future while keeping you stuck in the past. Holding on to unnecessary possessions often goes hand in hand with holding on to pain, anger, and resentment, and letting go of your material possessions may help you release emotional baggage.
When you make a conscious decision to fill your personal space with only the objects that you need or bring you joy, your energy level will soar. Clearing your personal space can lead to mental clarity and an improved memory. As you learn to have a more practical and temporary relationship to objects, positive changes will happen, and you’ll have space to create the life that you desire. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Conditioned as we are by our old ideas and old ways of living, it’s understandable that we tend to resist certain suggestions made to us when we first come to The Program. If that’s the cases, there’s no need to permanently reject such suggestions; it’s better, we’ve found, just temporarily to set them aside. The point is, there’s no hard-and-fast “right” way or “wrong” way. Each of us uses what’s best for himself or herself at a particular time, keeping an open mind regarding other kinds of help we may find valuable at another time. Am I trying to remain open-minded?
Today I Pray
May I be enlightened about the real meaning of an open mind, aware that my one-time definition of “open-minded” as “broad-minded” doesn’t seem to fit here. May I constantly keep my mind open to the suggestions of the solid many who came into The Program before me. What has worked for them may work for me, no matter how far-fetched or how obvious it may be.
Today I Will Remember
Only an open mind can be healed.
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One More Day
Nothing is unthinkable, nothing impossible to the balanced person, provided it arises out of the needs of life and is dedicated to life’s further developments.
– Lewis Mumford
Occasionally, we may be discouraged over the loss of an ability we’d always counted on. Accepting this loss often requires a major emotional adjustment.
Our lives need not be defined by our inabilities, but instead by our possibilities. If bogged down in negativity, we may truly become the disabled people that others see at first glance.
Marvelous opportunities for growth and joy often await us — through doors we can choose the open and pass through. Almost nothing is impossible if we want to get there badly enough.
I won’t use medical problems as excuses to bow out of life. Today, I will look for opportunities for challenge and growth.
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One Day At A Time
ETERNITY
“Every action of our lives
touches on some chord that will vibrate in eternity.”
Edwin Hubbel Chapin
When I first read this quote two thoughts came to mind. The first thought was that I owed it -- to myself and to every compulsive overeater in the world -- to recover from my disease. If I can recover from compulsive eating with the help of my Higher Power, then others will know that recovery is possible for them as well.
My second thought had to do with Bill W., Dr. Bob and all the other Twelve Step trailblazers. Did they realize that what they did in 1935 would have such a far-reaching impact on the world? Did they know that they would set in motion a program that would bring hope to addicted people everywhere? My guess is that they did not know, and that they probably would have scoffed at the very idea that they were starting a global recovery program that would empower millions.
I have written Edwin Chapin's quote in my Big Book to remind me of those who went before me and of those who will come after. It is my tribute to the eternal value of the Twelve Step program.
One day at a time...
I will remember that the things I do today will have a lasting impact on the future.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
A.A. is not a plan for recovery that can be finished and done with. It is a way of life, and the challenge contained in its principles is great enough to keep any human being striving for as long as he lives. We do not, cannot, out-grow this plan. As arrested alcoholics, we must have a program for living that allows for limitless expansion. Keeping one foot in front of the other is essential for maintaining our arrestment. Others may idle in a retrogressive groove without too much danger, but retrogression can spell death for us. However, this isn't as rough as it sounds, as we do become grateful for the necessity that makes us toe the line, for we find that we are more than compensated for a consistent effort by countless dividends we receive. - Pg. 311 - 4th. Edition - The Keys To The Kingdom
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
How long do we have to keep going to meetings? Until we want to go to meetings.
Grant me the will to keep going to meetings, until the day arrives that I want to go.
I Am Whole
Today, I see that my life is up to me. How I choose to live, what I will accomplish, how I conduct my intimate relationships, how I treat myself, all are in my own hands. I am no longer afraid that pain and anxiety will return me to a state of helplessness and vulnerability. Let it come; I am ready to meet it head-on. I am strong in the awareness that I can live as I choose to live. I have been willing to walk a path of recovery that, though difficult, has built a strength in me and a knowledge that I can survive my most painful feelings. I do not need to be afraid of my life if I am not afraid of myself or an emotional death. I have met and tamed the monsters that live inside me. I am comfortable in my own skin.
I am free to be who I am.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We are often surprised by who we can count on when the going gets tough. Someone we did not expect to come through might and others whom we thought we could count on may fall short of our expectations. We do not blame the ones that fall short and are grateful for the ones who go the extra mile.
I measure others by their best moments, not their worst.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Everyone needs to be loved...especially when they do not deserve it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know that if I'm coming from good and love, then only good and love with happen. Today I know that what I give, I receive back.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
After a few years sober a lady felt sorry for me and got me a job in sales. On the streets I used to sell a lot of things I didn't have, so with a product and a business card it was a piece of cake.- Allen F.
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AA Thought for the Day
July 14
Turning Points
Every day I stand at turning points.
My thoughts and actions can propel me toward growth or turn me down the road to old habits and to booze.
Sometimes turning points are beginnings,
as when I decide to start praising, instead of condemning someone. . .
At other times turning points are endings,
such as when I see clearly the need to stop festering resentments or crippling self-seeking.
- Daily Reflections, p. 15
Thought to Ponder . . .
May the road always lead where you need to be.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A A = Attitude Adjustment.
bluidkiti
07-14-2015, 08:22 AM
July 15
Daily Reflections
PRIDE
For thousands of years we have been demanding more than our share of security, prestige, and romance.
When we seemed to be succeeding, we drank to dream still greater dreams. When we were frustrated,
even in part, we drank for oblivion. Never was there enough of what we thought we wanted. In all these
strivings, so many of them well-intentioned, our crippling handicap had been our lack of humility. We had
lacked the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values had to come first, and that material
satisfactions were not the purpose of living.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 71
Time and again I approached the Seventh Step, only to fall back and regroup. Something was missing and the
impact of the Step escaped me. What had I overlooked? A single word: read but ignored, the foundation of all the
Steps, indeed the entire Alcoholics Anonymous program - that word is "humbly". I understood my shortcomings:
I constantly put tasks off; I angered easily; I felt too much self-pity; and thought, why me? Then I remembered,
"Pride goeth before the fall," and I eliminated pride from my life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
After we had sobered up through the A.A. program, we gradually began to get a peace of mind and serenity which we never thought were possible. This peace of mind is based on a feeling that fundamentally all is well. That does not mean that all is well on the surface of things. Little things can keep going wrong and big things can keep on upsetting us. But deep down in our hearts we know that everything is eventually going to be all right, now that we are living sober lives. Have I achieved a deep down, inner calm?
Meditation For The Day
You are climbing up the ladder of life, which reaches into eternity. Would God plant your feet upon an insecure ladder? Its supports may be out of sight, hidden in secret places, but if God has asked you to step on and up firmly, then surely He has secured your ladder. Faith gives you the strength to climb steadily this ladder of life. You should leave your security to God and trust Him not to let you fall. He is there to give you all the power you need to keep on climbing.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may climb the ladder of life without fear. I pray that I may progress steadily through the rest of my life with faith and confidence.
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As Bill Sees It
Antidote For Fear, p. 196
When our failings generate fear, we then have soul-sickness. This
sickness, in turn, generates still more character defects.
Unreasonable fear that our instincts will not be satisfied drives us to
covet the possessions of others, to lust for sex and power, to become
angry when our instinctive demands are threatened, to be envious
when the ambitions of others seem to be realized while ours are not.
We eat, drink, and grab for more of everything than we need, fearing
we shall never have enough. And, with genuine alarm at the prospect
of work, we stay lazy. We loaf and procrastinate, or at best work
grudgingly and under half steam.
These fears are the termites that ceaselessly devour the foundations
of whatever sort of life we try to build.
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As faith grows, so does inner security. The vast underlying fear of
nothingness commences to subside. We of A.A. find that our basic
antidote for fear is a spiritual awakening.
1. 12 & 12, p. 49
2. Grapevine, January 1962
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Walk In Dry Places
The Possible Dream
Reaching objectives.
Although we hear people ridicule the practice of daydreaming, we also hear them express admiration for people who pursued and realized their dreams. How do we know when we are pursing the right dreams?
Useful, effective dreams may seem farfetched, but they still have a possibility of fulfillment. In some ways, they're tied to what we can do if we have the right opportunities and use our talents properly.
Fantasies, or useless dreams, can never happen. Fantasies are often based on our past and how it might have been different. It's also useless to fantasize about feats that are completely beyond anything we could ever do. These dreams are a waste of time and energy.
What's exciting, however, is that very person can find dreams that are possible and based on reality. It's important to pursue these dreams and bring them into realization.
I'll keep my realistic dreams very much alive today, knowing they're the patterns I need for reaching my long-term objectives.
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Keep It Simple
Let there be spaces in your togetherness.---Kahil Gilran
We all need time alone. Then we can get to know our Higher Power better too.
When we were using chemicals, we were afraid of being alone. We didn't want to think too much.
So we got high.
Now we know we're never totally alone. Our Higher Power is with us. We can relax. We can rest.
We can think, read, and meditate. We can our own best friend.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me use my time alone to know myself better. Help me get to know You too.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll plan to spend two hours alone to get to know myself better. I could take a long walk, or enjoy a park, or my garden. What will I do, and when?
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Each Day a New Beginning
If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain; If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one pain, Or help one fainting robin into his nest again, I shall not live in vain. --Emily Dickinson
The gift of attention to each other is "passing on" the love of God. In order to feel love, we have to give it away. We will know love when we give love.
Our attachment to the world, the sense of belonging most of us longed for the many years prior to recovery, awaits us, is showered upon us even as we reach out to someone else. We are no longer alone, scared, alienated when we let others know they are not alone. We can heal one another. The program opens the way for our healing.
Each day, each one of us can ease the pain of a friend, a co-worker, a child. The beauty of the program, the beauty of God's plan for us all, is that our own pain is relieved in the process of easing the pain of another. Love is the balm. Loving others makes our lives purposeful.
No day is lived in vain, if I but cherish someone else's presence.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Sometimes it is wise to wait till he goes on a binge. The family may object to this, but unless he is in a dangerous physical condition, it is better to risk it. Don’t deal with him when he is very drunk, unless he is ugly and the family needs your help. Wait for the end of the spree, or at least for a lucid interval. Then let his family or a friend ask him if he wants to quit for good and if he would go to any extreme to do so. If he says yes, then his attention should be drawn to you as a person who has recovered. You should be described to him as one of a fellowship who, as part of their own recovery, try to help others and who will be glad to talk to him if he cares to see you.
p. 90
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
I went to Clark, the community butcher, and I said, "Clark, what is the matter with me? I don't feel right. I have been on this program for three months and I feel terrible." And he said, "Earle, why don't you come on over and let me talk to you for a minute.' So he got me a cup of coffee and a piece of cake, and sat me down and said, "Why, there's nothing wrong with you. You've been sober for three months, been working hard. You've been doing all right." But then he said, "Let me say something to you. We have here in this community an organization that helps people, and this organization is known as Alcoholics Anonymous. Why don't you join it?" I said, "What do you think I've been doing?" "Well," he said, "you've been sober, but you've been floating way up on a cloud somewhere. Why don't you go home and get the Big Book and open it to page fifty-eight and see what it says?" So I did. I got the Big Book and I read it, and this is what it said: "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path." The word "thoroughly" rang a bell. And then it went on to say: "Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point." And the last sentence was "We asked His protection and care with complete abandon."
pp. 304-305
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Yet if A.A.'s experience means anything at all, this is not only unwise, but is actually a perilous resolve. Few muddled attitudes have caused us more trouble than holding back on Step Five. Some people are unable to stay sober at all; others will relapse periodically until they really clean house. Even A.A. old timers, sober for years, often pay dearly for skimping this Step. They will tell how they tried to carry the load alone; how much they suffered of irritability, anxiety, remorse, and depression; and how, unconsciously seeking relief, they would sometimes accuse even their best friends of the very character defects they themselves were trying to conceal. They always discovered that relief never came by confessing the sins of other people. Everybody had to confess his own.
p. 56
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If you let cloudy water settle, it will become clear. If you let your upset mind settle, your course will also become clear.
--Jack Kornfield
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him.
--Buddha
"Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence."
--Aristotle
Today, I will trust that God's will is happening as it needs to in my life. I will not make myself anxious and upset by searching vigorously for God's will, taking unnecessary actions to control the course of my destiny or wondering if God's will has passed me by and I have missed it.
--Melody Beattie
The greatest good we can do for others is not to share our riches with them, but to reveal their own.
--Author Unknown
In seeking wisdom, the first step is silence, the second listening, the third remembering, the fourth practicing, the fifth teaching others.
--Ibn Gabirol, poet and philosopher (ca. 1022-1058)
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MUSIC
"I know that the twelve notes in
each octave and the varieties of
rhythm offer me opportunities
that all of human genius will
never exhaust."
--Igor Stravinsky
There is so much to be gained in life. Just when you think you have exhausted all possibilities, a new insight is perceived, permutations and varieties appear in abundance. An example is sobriety. I thought it meant not drinking but today I see that it affects all areas of my life -- how I walk, the hugs I freely give, my acceptance of others, my willingness to trust and risk, my optimism for a new day.
Also God is comprehensive for me today. He is alive in church, the Bible and tradition but He is also alive in literature, scripture, sexuality and music. Today I can hear beyond the symphony into the unfathomable message of God's love for His creation. And always I hear something different and new.
Thank You, Lord, for Your messengers who love through the art of music.
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He replied, "Because you have so little faith, I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:20
[God] is able to accomplish abundantly far more than all we can ask or imagine.
Ephesians 3:21
"Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'"
Matthew 19: 26
The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father's God, and I will exalt him.
EX 15:2
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Daily Inspiration
Give thanks for not only all that you have, but all that you are. Lord, may I recognize the goodness within me and know that I am lovable even with my shortcomings.
To give of yourself is when you truly give. Lord, even in my busiest moments may I be able to make time when someone really needs me.
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NA Just For Today
Relations With Others
"We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all."
Step Eight
All human beings struggle with self-centeredness. The chronic self-centeredness that lies at the very core of addiction makes that struggle doubly difficult for people like us. Many of us have lived as if we believed we were the last people on earth, utterly blind to the effect our behavior has had on those around us.
The Eighth Step is the process our program has given us to honestly examine our past relationships. We take a look at the writing we did on our Fourth Step to identify the effects our actions had on the people in our lives. When we recognize harm done to some of those people, we become willing to take responsibility for our actions by making amends to them.
The variety of people we encounter in our day and the quality of our relations with them determines, to a great extent, the quality of our very lives. Love, humor, excitement, caring - the things that make life worth living derive much of their meaning from being shared with others. Understanding this, we want to discover the true nature of our relationships with other people and mend whatever breaks we may find in those relations. We want to work the Eighth Step.
Just for today: I want to fully enjoy the companionship of my fellows. I will examine my relationships with the people in my life. Where I find I've harmed others, I will seek the willingness to make amends to them.
pg. 205
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I was forced to live far beyond my years when just a child. Now I have reversed the order and I intend to remain young indefinitely. --Mary Pickford
We can all learn to change our lives so the child within each of us can live in balance with the people we have become. We can learn to give the child a voice, let the child play, let the child express needs and fears and pleasures.
We might look at our old baby pictures for a valuable lesson. We will see pictures of ourselves on rocking horses, grinning and waving; pictures of ourselves with our most precious toy--a crude metal car, perhaps; pictures of ourselves rolling in the grass. The lesson we learn is that it doesn't take much to make this child happy--even today.
We keep our own happiness safe inside us to call on whenever we need it, as long as we keep a healthy relationship with the child within. When we nourish the child, we can be assured the child will also nourish us.
What simple thing will make me happy today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
There is nothing you can say in answer to a compliment. I have been complimented myself a great many times, and they always embarrass me - I always feel that they have not said enough. --Mark Twain
Hearing the good words and praise of another person is harder for some of us to accept than criticism and abuse. Perhaps it is easier to receive what we are accustomed to, or maybe we feel a loss of control when someone compliments us. This is a time for us to begin accepting others' actions. We do not need to be in control of our relationships at all times. When friends offer sincere compliments, we don't need to push them away or brush them off.
All we need to do is allow others' positive messages to come into us. In a good relationship we listen to the feelings of our friends, and sometimes that means truly listening as they tell us their good feelings about us.
Today, I will be open to the compliments that come my *way without controlling them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain; If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one pain, Or help one fainting robin into his nest again, I shall not live in vain. --Emily Dickinson
The gift of attention to each other is "passing on" the love of God. In order to feel love, we have to give it away. We will know love when we give love.
Our attachment to the world, the sense of belonging most of us longed for the many years prior to recovery, awaits us, is showered upon us even as we reach out to someone else. We are no longer alone, scared, alienated when we let others know they are not alone. We can heal one another. The program opens the way for our healing.
Each day, each one of us can ease the pain of a friend, a co-worker, a child. The beauty of the program, the beauty of God's plan for us all, is that our own pain is relieved in the process of easing the pain of another. Love is the balm. Loving others makes our lives purposeful.
No day is lived in vain, if I but cherish someone else's presence.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Family Buttons
I was thirty five years old the first time I spoke up to my mother and refused to buy into her games and manipulation. I was terribly frightened and almost couldn't believe I was doing this. I found I didn't have to be meant. I didn't have to start an argument. But I could say what I wanted and needed to say to take care of myself. I learned I could love and honor myself, and still care about my mother - the way I wanted to - not the way she wanted me to. --Anonymous
Who knows better how to push our buttons than family members? Who, besides family members, do we give such power?
No matter how long we or our family members have been recovering, relationships with family members can be provocative.
One telephone conversation can put us in an emotional and psychological tailspin that lasts for hours or days.
Sometimes, it gets worse when we begin recovery because we become even more aware of our reactions and our discomfort. That's uncomfortable, but good. It is by beginning this process of awareness and acceptance that we change, grow, and heal.
The process of detaching in love from family members can take years. So can the process of learning how to react in a more effective way. We cannot control what they do or try to do, but we can gain some sense of control over how we choose to react.
Stop trying to make them act or treat us any differently. Unhook from their system by refusing to try to change or influence them.
Their patterns, particularly their patterns with us, are their issues. How we react, or allow these patterns to influence us, is our issue. How we take care of ourselves is our issue.
We can love our family and still refuse to buy into their issues. We can love our family but refuse their efforts to manipulate, control, or produce guilt in us.
We can take care of ourselves with family members without feeling guilty. We can learn to be assertive with family members without being aggressive. We can set the boundaries we need and want to set with family members without being disloyal to the family.
We can learn to love our family without forfeiting love and respect for ourselves.
Today, help me start practicing self care with family members. Help me know that I do not have to allow their issues to control my life, my day, or my feelings. Help me know it's okay to have all my feelings about family members, without guilt or shame.
Today I choose to think positive. Today I let my thoughts lead the way to success and happiness. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Delight in Yourself
Stop picking on yourself, worrying if you’re good enough, wondering what people will see if you let them see your heart. This is what they’ll see: that you are a lovable and delightful soul, beautiful child of God.
Be yourself and accept yourself–warts, waistline,and all. You don’t have to sit up that straight, be that proper, or fear what others may see. Let your imperfections show! Share them! Love yourself anyway! Relax, and be who you are! When you do that, your life will be fun and a joyful gift to others.
People who comfortably accept who they are– both their flaws and their good points– are healing, delightful, and fun to be around. Look at any work of nature: a canyon, a flower, a bird. A mountain or a forest trail. Where does the perfection begin and imperfecting end? It’s the combination that makes a perfect scene. So it is with you.
Relax. Lighten up. Let go of shame and fear. The whole picture is perfect, and perfectly okay.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Expect grief to be a lot of grief
Your grief will take more energy than you would have ever imagined.
–Theresa A. Rondo
How to Go on Living When Someone You Love Dies
Grief is more than one feeling. Depending on the nature of the loss, it may become a temporary way of life. It may last eight weeks or eight years.
Let go of any judgements you have about grief and about how long you think it should take to get over that loss. Instead, practice compassion for other people and for yourself.
Keep your expectations realistic. Give anyone who’s grieving, whether it’s yourself or someone else, more latitude than you think could possibly be needed.
God, there’s a lot of broken hearts on this planet. Please heal them all, including mine.
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In God’s Care
Prayer enlarges the heart until it is capable of containing God’s gift to himself.
~~Mother Teresa
In praying, some of us depend on the traditions of our religion, others on the instructions of spriitual leaders. Some of us just strike out on our own, not knowing what to say or what to do, yet believing that form is not as important as intent. We only know that when we do pray, something happens.
And each time we lift our thoughts to God, it is easier the next time. Then, as we keep praying, we discover that we have begun to establish a familiarity. Our heart is opening to God without our realizing it. When we are willing, God fills our heart. And even though we can leave God, and often do, God never leaves us.
I am grateful that God is in my heart. My prayer is one of thanks.
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Day By Day
Recognizing opportunities
Today is a day of opportunity. Any experiences that we have today – good or bad – can be seen as opportunities, opportunities to grow closer to God.
As bread is food for the body, opportunities are food for the soul.
Do I see all the opportunities in my daily life? Do I take advantage of them?
I pray that I may use my experiences as opportunities to grow closer to God.
Today I will look for opportunities by…
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Food for Thought
Clean Abstinence
It is easy to become sloppy in our abstinence and in our program. This is where a daily inventory is an invaluable aid. When we catch ourselves cheating just a little on measurements, making excuses to skip meetings, neglecting to follow the promptings of our Higher Power, it is time for housecleaning.
If we have stopped calling in our food plan and are having trouble with abstinence, we may need to get in touch with a food sponsor. Many of us find it hard to admit that we cannot do everything alone! False pride can be our downfall. If we pretend that all is well when it is not, we cut ourselves off from the help of the group.
The time to correct small mistakes is immediately, before they get bigger and make us discouraged. Admitting the mistake to another person clears the way for correction and change.
Thank You for those who help me maintain clean abstinence.
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Elegant Blessings
Living a Life of Grace by Madisyn Taylor
When we accept that we always exist in a state of grace, we are able to live our lives more graciously.
Grace exists inside of all of us and around us. It is our inner beauty that radiates outward, touching everyone we meet. It is that unseen hand that comes from the divine, raising us up when we most need it. To be able to live in a state of grace is not based on worthiness, nor is it earned through good deeds, ritual, or sacrifice. Rather it is an unearned favor, freely bestowed and available to all, that is inherent to our birthright. All we must do is open our eyes to its presence and we will find and experience grace everywhere.
Grace is in the rain bringing relief to drought-ridden farms, and the unexpected lead for the perfect job opportunity that comes from a stranger. Grace is what happens to someone when they miraculously escape injury; it is even the simple events that happen to us that we call “good luck,” like when we don’t get a parking ticket after are meter has expired. Grace resides in the love between two people, the gift or check that comes unexpectedly in the mail, the cozy comforts that make up a home, and in the acts of forgiveness we bestow upon others. It is grace that moves us to go out of our way to help a stranger. In music, a grace note is the pause between notes that is so important to the pacing of a song. Grace is the state we are in when we are doing nothing but just being who we are.
When we accept that we always exist in a state of grace, we are able to live our lives more graciously. Knowing we are graced gives us hope, makes us more generous, and allows us to trust that we are taken care of even when we are going through difficult times. Grace is our benevolence of heart, and our generosity of spirit. Grace is unconditional love and the beauty that is our humanity. When we know that we are blessed with grace, we can’t help but want to live our lives in harmony. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Faced with almost certain destruction by our addictions, we eventually had no choice but to become open-minded on spiritual matters. In that sense, the chemicals of drugs we used were potent persuaders; they finally whipped us into a state of reasonableness. We came to learn that when we stubbornly close the doors on our minds, we’re locking out far more than we’re locking in. Do I immediately reject new ideas? Or do I patiently strive to change my old way of living?
Today I Pray
May I keep an open mind especially on spiritual matters, remembering that “spiritual” is a bigger word than “religious.” (I was born of the Spirit, but I was taught religion.) May I remember that a locked mind is a symptom of my addiction and an open mind is essential to my recovery.
Today I Will Remember
If I lock more out than I lock in, what am I protecting?
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One More Day
Let us then be up and doing, with a heart for any fate.
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
There may have been times in our lives when we have been forced, for one reason or another, to eat a bland diet. The reasons don’t matter; what does matter is how totally bored we became with the unvarying beige-and-white soft menu! Before long we had lost our anticipation of eating.
We may sometimes place ourselves on a bland diet of life. Daily routine says much the same, day after day, year after year. From home to work to the sofa to bed, and start all over again. Some routine is like a healthy diet that gives us stability and safety, but a sprinkling of risk is the seasoning that adds zest to our lives. We can reach out for what is not habit. We can continue to try when previous efforts have failed. We can take a generous helping of life.
I can dare to change or to try new things without sacrificing all of my routine and safety.
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One Day At A Time
~ SELF-TRUTH ~
"You cannot be true to God or to anyone else until you are true to yourself."
Sr. Jeanne Koma, H.M.
I have spent much of my life role-playing. As spouse, parent, employee, addict, I have often lost myself. Who am I? Why am I here? If I played none of those roles, would I still exist?
It wasn't until I took the time to discover the 'real' me, the person God created, that I was able to be a better spouse, parent, and employee. And it was through this discovery that the addict in me began taking a back seat to the child of God that I truly am.
I cannot do God's will nor be supportive of others if I am dishonest about who I am.
When Moses asked God who He was, God replied, "I am who I am." I am also who I am. I have nothing of which to be ashamed.
One Day at a Time . . .
I must be true to myself if I wish to be of service to anyone else.
~Debbie~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I spend a great deal of time passing on what I learned to others who want and need it badly. I do it for four reasons:
1. Sense of duty.
2. It is a pleasure.
3. Because in so doing I am paying my debt to the man who took time to pass it on to me.
4. Because every time I do it I take out a little more insurance for myself against a possible slip. - Page 180-181 - 4th. Edition - Doctor Bob's Nightmare
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is remarkable how often we run across this feeling of 'uniqueness' as we recover: we used more, had worse contacts, spent more in bars, treated our family worse, were younger, older, blacker, gayer, more sensitive--whatever.
Let me see in this next hour, one area that I feel I'm 'unique' which is actually commonplace for us addicts.
Hesitation
Today, I will walk the walk and talk the talk. It will not be good for me, ultimately, to half commit myself. In a way, the particular path that I take is less significant than that I take a path. I can second-guess myself and my experience. Commitment to a path is really commitment to myself. I am allowing myself to take a clear direction, one in which I can actualize my talents on a day-to-day basis, one that will allow me to build a foundation and a structure in which I can live. I will have a passion in life, a passion that takes me beyond myself, a passion to love, nourish, be led and challenged by. I will follow it, and it will follow me.
I deserve a passion in my life.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Pissing contests about who used how much and who acted bad are ego trips in reverse. 'It doesn't matter what or how much we used. In NA, staying clean has to come first. We realize that we cannot use drugs and live.' (P 19, NA Basic Text).
When I brag about how much I used, how bad it was, and how much damage I did, I am doing one of two things, trying to make myself look larger or them smaller.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Coffee makers make it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to think positive. Today I let my thoughts lead the way to success and happiness.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
'The best thing for you is to give up drinking.' 'Yeah.. What's the next best thing?' - Anon.
bluidkiti
07-15-2015, 06:58 AM
July 16
Daily Reflections
"A MEASURE OF HUMILITY"
In every case, pain had been the price of admission into a new life.
But this admission price had purchased more than we expected. It
brought a measure of humility, which we soon discovered to be a
healer of pain.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 75
It was painful to give up trying to control my life, even though success
eluded me, and when life got too rough, I drank to escape. Accepting
life on life's terms will be mastered through the humility I experience
when I turn my will and my life over to the care of God, as I
understand Him. With my life in God's care, fear, uncertainty, and anger
are no longer my response to those portions of life that I would rather
not have happen to me. The pain of living through these times will be
healed by the knowledge that I have received the spiritual strength to
survive.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We can believe that God is in His heaven and that He has a
purpose for our lives, which will eventually work out as long as we
try to live the way we believe He wants us to live. It has been said
that we should "wear the world like a loose garment." That
means nothing should seriously upset us because we have a deep,
abiding faith that God will always take care of us. To us that
means not to be too upset by the surface wrongness of things, but to
feel deeply secure in the fundamental goodness and purpose in the
universe. Do I feel deeply secure?
Meditation For The Day
Like the shadow of a great rock in a desert land, God is your
refuge from the ills of life. The old hymn says: "Rock of ages
cleft for me, let me hide myself in Thee." God can be your shelter
from the storm. God's power can protect you from every temptation
and defeat. Try to feel His divine power--call on it--accept it--and
use it. Armed with that power, you can face anything. Each day,
seek safety in God's secret place, in communion with Him. You
cannot be wholly touched or seriously harmed there. God can be
your refuge.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may find a haven in the thought of God. I pray that I
may abide in that Strong Tower, strongly guarded.
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As Bill Sees It
Where Rationalizing Leads, p. 197
"You know what our genius for rationalization is. If, to ourselves, we
fully justify one slip, then our rationalizing propensities are almost
sure to justify another one, perhaps with a different set of excuses.
But one justification leads to another and presently we are back on
the bottle full-time."
********************************
Experience shows, all too often, that even the "controlled" pill-taker
may get out of control. The same crazy rationalizations that once
characterized his drinking begin to blight his existence. He thinks that
if pills can cure insomnia so may they cure his worry.
Our friends the doctors are seldom directly to blame for the dire
results we so often experience. It is much too easy for alcoholics to
buy these dangerous drugs, and once possessed of them the drinker is
often likely to use them without any judgment whatever.
1. Letter, 1959
2. Grapevine, November 1945
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Walk In Dry Places
Accepting and correcting mistakes.
Mature living.
Being in error now and then is part of our human existence. Many of us, however, feel unbearable self-reproach when we make a mistake. Some compulsive people even blame themselves for errors beyond their control.
But the worst mistake is the refusal, or denial, of responsibility for mistakes. This comes from a strange belief that we can erase the mistake by refusing to accept it. It may stem from the belief that we should be above mistakes. This is immature thinking.
We are learning and growing when we accept our mistakes graciously and immediately move to correct them. Most of the time, when this is done, the distress passes quickly and we can go on to other matters.
I'll take full responsibility for all of my actions today, and I'll move quickly to correct any of my mistakes.
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Keep It Simple
We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
---Will Rogers
Humility is being thankful for the chance to watch the parade. There were days we thought that all that counted were the heroes. But our program has no heroes. It has many fine, spiritual people. . . but no heroes.
When someone is needed to make coffee or pick up after a meeting, we can be willing to do those things. Let's look at doing these little jobs as our way of looking for a good spot on the curb. . . .to watch the parade! The floats are so colorful, and the bands play so loud!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be proud of who I am, instead of always putting myself down because I'm not who I "should" be.
Action for the Day: I will look and help someone today. Service to others is service to my Higher Power.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I have come to believe in the "Sacrament of the Moment," which presupposes trust in the ultimate goodness of my creator. --Ruth Casey
The moment, realized, is like a bud blossoming. The day unfolds and with each minute we are moved along to the experiences right for us at this place and this time. Our resistance to certain experiences and particular people creates the barrier that blocks the good in store for us.
We can rest assured; our higher power is caring for us. Each breath we take is Spirit-filled, and the plan for our lives is an accumulation of necessary experiences that is helping us to grow and develop our special talents. What we often forget is that the difficult periods of our lives stretch us, enlighten us, ready us to be the women we desire within to be.
This moment is sacred. All moments are sacred. They will not come again. What is offered this moment for us to grow on will not be offered in exactly this way again. Our higher power knows our needs and is caring for them. We can trust the goodness of today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If he does not want to see you, never force yourself upon him. Neither should the family hysterically plead with him to do anything, nor should they tell him much about you. They should wait for the end of his next drinking bout. You might place this book where he can see it in the interval. Here no specific rule can be given. The family must decide these things. But urge them not to be over-anxious, for that might spoil matters.
pp. 90-91
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
"Complete abandon"; "Half measures availed us nothing"; "Thoroughly followed our path"; "Completely give themselves to this simple program" rang in my swelled head.
p. 305
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This practice of admitting one's defects to another person is, of course, very ancient. It has been validated in every century, and it characterizes the lives of all spiritually centered and truly religious people. But today religion is by no means the sole advocate of this saving principle. Psychiatrists and psychologists point out the deep need every human being has for practical insight and knowledge of his own personality flaws and for a discussion of them with an understanding and trustworthy person. So far as alcoholics are concerned, A.A. would go even further. Most of us would declare that without a fearless admission of our defects to another human being we could not stay sober. It seems plain that the grace of God will not enter to expel our destructive obsessions until we are willing to try this.
pp. 56-57
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Let a joy keep you. Reach out your hands and take it when it runs by.
--Carl Sandburg
You can have fun and still be efficient. In fact, you will be more
efficient.
--Stress Fractures, p.155
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds
you plant.
--Robert Louis Stevenson
It is easy to sit up and take notice. What is difficult is getting up
and taking action.
--Al Batt
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind
word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of
caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
--Leo Buscaglia
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
DESIRE
"One must not lose desires. They
are mighty stimulating to
creativeness, to love, and to long
life."
--Alexander A. Bogomoletz
Today I desire to live. I have discovered value in my life. I have
experienced personal self-esteem. I am able to feel again, talk,
trust and laugh again. Today I desire to live.
But I can remember when I felt lonely, isolated, angry, shutdown
and hopeless. The desires I had were destructive, desiring
isolation mingled with alcohol. Then the pain became too great and
I experienced a vital "moment". I realized I needed to make a
choice -- was I to live or die? I chose to live!
This was the beginning of my spiritual journey into self from which
I discovered God and His world. Creative and positive desires
were re-born in my life, and I am able to live and love again.
O Lord, may I continue to desire those things that do not hurt me.
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Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
John 10:10b
If you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.
Mark 11:26
God's foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God's weakness is stronger than human strength.
1 Corinthians 1:25
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Daily Inspiration
More strength is found in the ability to be flexible than in stubborn determination. Lord, when life makes extra demands on me, guide me and help me adapt easily to the necessary changes for the best results.
Worse than being a quitter is the one who is afraid to begin. Lord, grant me the courage to believe in myself and the ability to focus on what I can do, not what I can't do.
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NA Just For Today
Self-esteem
"Deep inside, I had feellngs of inadequacy and inferiority."
Basic Text, p. 112
Somewhere along the way, many of us developed strong feelings of inadequacy and inferiority. Deep inside was a voice that continually cried out, "You're worthless!" Many of us learn to recognize this characteristic of low self-esteem very early in our recovery. Some of us may feel that our feelings of inferiority were where all our problems began.
Whether we learn this low self-esteem in our families or through our interactions with others, in NA we learn the tools for reclaiming ourselves. Building up our fractured self-esteem sometimes begins by simply accepting a service position. Or perhaps our phone begins to ring, and for the first time people are calling just to see how we are. They don't want anything from us but to reach out and help.
Next we get a sponsor, someone who teaches us that we are worthwhile and believes in us until we can believe in ourselves. Our sponsor guides us through the Twelve Steps where we learn who we really are, not who we have built ourselves up or down to be.
Low self-esteem doesn't go away overnight. Sometimes it takes years for us to really get in touch with ourselves. But with the help of other members of NA who share our same feelings, and by working the Twelve Steps, we blossom into individuals that others and, most importantly, we ourselves respect.
Just for today: I will remember that I am deserving of my Higher Power's love. I know that I am a worthy human being.
pg. 206
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Let a joy keep you. Reach out your hands and take it when it runs by. --Carl Sandburg
There is a song that says joy is like the rain. It comes across our window pane and then goes away again. When joy comes knocking at our window we can reach out and let it in. Joy comes to us in many ways--through deep laughter, through games played together in a spirit of fun and sharing. Singing together, skating, and being around a campfire are all ways we share joy. Yet joy can also be felt alone.
Each moment of joy we reach for strengthens our spirits. Joyful memories can sustain us through days of long hard work. Like rain, joy comes and goes, yet its nourishment keeps our spirits alive.
How can I share my joy today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Do not seek death. Death will find you. --Dag Hammarskjold
When we accept deep within ourselves the fact that we will die, that our days are numbered as certainly as those of each thriving, bustling generation before us, then we become more fully alive and vital men. Facing this raises grief over our loss, and we wish to avoid it. Yet, death keeps us honest. It highlights the folly of our questions about whether we should live or die and confronts us with the self-destructive behaviors we have used. Some of us have nearly killed ourselves by our extreme behaviors.
Since death is certain, the real question is. How shall we live? By pursuing recovery and spiritual growth we have chosen to live more fully and to use our energies well. We live with commitment to our highest values. We stay in tune with our inner voice to help us make choices. We play, we love, and we celebrate the miracle of life every day, not because there is no grief, but because life is precious and time is limited.
Today, I will accept my grief over the limits of life. I will celebrate its wonder.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I have come to believe in the "Sacrament of the Moment," which presupposes trust in the ultimate goodness of my creator.
--Ruth Casey
The moment, realized, is like a bud blossoming. The day unfolds and with each minute we are moved along to the experiences right for us at this place and this time. Our resistance to certain experiences and particular people creates the barrier that blocks the good in store for us.
We can rest assured; our higher power is caring for us. Each breath we take is Spirit-filled, and the plan for our lives is an accumulation of necessary experiences that is helping us to grow and develop our special talents. What we often forget is that the difficult periods of our lives stretch us, enlighten us, ready us to be the women we desire within to be.
This moment is sacred. All moments are sacred. They will not come again. What is offered this moment for us to grow on will not be offered in exactly this way again. Our higher power knows our needs and is caring for them. We can trust the goodness of today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Insisting on the Best
We deserve the best life and love has to offer, but we are each faced with the challenge of learning to identify what that means in our life. We must each come to grips with our own understanding of what we believe we deserve, what we want, and whether we are receiving it.
There is only one place to start, and that is right where we are, in our current circumstances. The place we begin is with us.
What hurts? What makes us angry? What are we whining and complaining about? Are we discounting how much a particular behavior is hurting us? Are we making excuses for the other person, telling ourselves we're "too demanding"?
Are we reluctant, for a variety of reasons, especially fear, to tackle the issues in our relationships that may be hurting us? Do we know what's hurting us and do we know that we have a right to stop our pain, if we want to do that?
We can begin the journey from deprived to deserving. We can start it today. We can also be patient and gentle with ourselves, as we travel in important increments from believing we deserve second best, to knowing in our hearts that we deserve the best, and taking responsibility for that.
Today, I will pay attention to how I allow people to treat me, and how I feel about that. I will also watch how I treat others. I will not overreact by taking their issues too personally and too seriously; I will not under react by denying that certain behaviors are inappropriate and not acceptable to me.
Whatever situation I encounter today, I will believe in its goodness. It is right for me. It may stretch my patience rather than elicit laughter, but it is right for me at this time.
Today I am willing to give away what I need for myself. I am willing to listen to someone else's problems. That way we will both see that we are traveling together on the same journey and are not alone. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Go a Little Further
I arrived at Oregon’s Willamette National Forest after dark. Suddenly I found myself at a fork in the road. To the right was a chained gate marked “Foot Travelers Welcome. To the left was an open road marked “Nature Sanctuary, Authorized Visitors Only.”
I stared at both signs, then headed to the left. I didn’t see anything that looked like lodging and I began to feel uncomfortable, like one of the unauthorized visitors the sign warned about. I backed the car out to the fork, turned around and left.
Two hours later, I still hadn’t found the retreat. I was tired and worried about running out of gas. I tried to remember what I’d been learning– that desperation attracts more desperation. I relaxed and visualized myself finding the retreat, being given a key to a room, and going to sleep in a bed. I visualized it until I could see the scene clearly in my mind.
Before long I found myself back at the fork. I mean no harm, I thought. So I’ll just drive down that nature sanctuary road again, the one for authorized visitors only. I drove as far as I had before, then decided to push ahead a bit more. I rounded the bend and there it was– the parking lot, the night office, and a man who could give me a key to my room. Within twenty minutes, I was in bed for the evening.
Sometimes we need to go further than we thought we could. We need to go past our fear, past our uncertainty, past the bend we can’t see beyond. If we stay on the course, give it that extra push, and go round the bend, we may find what we’re looking for.
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More Language Of Letting Go
There’s a bottom to the well
“I’m not disconnected from my emotions,” said Jan. “But what I am is frightened. I go so deeply into some feelings that I think that how I’m feeling now is the way I’ll always feel. I get frightened, especially with sadness, that there’s no end, no bottom, to what I’m going through.”
Some feelings are just plain big. It feels like we’ve fallen into an emotional well with no bottom.
We haven’t. There is a bottom. It may take a while to ge there, but there is a bottom. And there are ways we can take care of ourselves when we’re feeling this way. Some people get professional help. Others make a decision to go through it, giving special care to themselves. If you’re going through an emotionally exhausting time, you may want to design your own care routine. Here are some suggestions that have helped some people get through these times.
. If you’re involved with a support group, go to your meetings, even and especially if you don’t feel like going out.
. Let a trusted friend know what you’re going through. Ask that person for support, be clear in asking for what you need.
. Get plenty of rest. It takes a lot of energy to go through feelings this big.
. Make yourself get up and get out sometimes,too. Just the sheer act of being around people, in a park or at the mall, reminds us that life goes on when it feels like our life has stopped. Ask yourself what might feel good, and listen to any positive ideas you get.
. Exercise, even if you don’t want to. Move your body around. It’ll help move those feelings around,too.
. Make daily goals, a list of things you want and need to do each day. Give yourself room to feel your feelings, but exercise your will and volition,too.
. Don’t let your environment reflect what you’re feeling; let it reflect how you want to feel. Tidy up your living space.
. Give yourself time deadlines for emotions. For instance, give yourself half an hour to thoroughly and completely give in to the feeling, then go do something else for a while. Go for a walk, watch TV, go to a movie, read a book. Tell yourself you’re not running away from the feeling. You’re just going to take a break for a while.
. Journal. Write about how you feel. Few things in life can substitute or work better than actually making a connection with ourselves.
. Then pray. Connecting with God always help.
God, help me accept and get through all my feelings, even the big ones.
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Food for Thought
Hard Right or Easy Wrong?
We are constantly faced with choices, and often we are tempted to follow the way of least resistance. In our dealings with others and ourselves it is usually easier to say yes than no, but yes is not always the best answer. If we are too permissive, we become lax and ineffective.
The problem with taking the easy way is that it usually ends up being harder in the long run. If we do not control our eating, we will have all of the problems of obesity. If we do not limit our spending, we will eventually lack funds for what we need. If we do not follow moral and ethical principles, our lives become chaotic and we live in constant fear and tension.
Although choosing the hard right is difficult, it is by exercising our ethical muscles that we become strong and gain self-respect.
By Your grace, may I make the right choices.
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Recognizing Our Own Greatness
The Greatness in Others by Madisyn Taylor
We are all moved by greatness when we see it we know the feeling of it and have it within ourselves.
A person who is said to possess greatness stands apart from others in some way, usually by the size or originality of their vision and their ability to manifest that vision. And yet those who recognize that greatness, whether they display it themselves or not, also have greatness within them; otherwise, they could not see it in another. In many ways, the achievements of one person always belong to many people for we accomplish nothing alone in this world. People who display greatness rely upon others who are able to see as they do, to listen, encourage, and support. Without those people who recognize greatness and move in to support it, even the greatest ideas, works of art, and political movements would remain unborn.
We are all moved by greatness when we see it, and although the experience is to some degree subjective, we know the feeling of it. When we encounter it, it is as if something in us stirs, awakens, and comes forth to meet what was inside us all along. When we respond to someone else’s greatness, we feed our own. We may feel called to dedicate ourselves to their vision, or we may be inspired to follow a path we forge ourselves. Either way, we cannot lose when we recognize that the greatness we see in others belongs also to us. Our recognition of this is a call to action that, if heeded, will inspire others to see in us the greatness they also possess. This creates a chain reaction of greatness unfolding itself endlessly into the future.
Ultimately, greatness is simply the best of what humanity has to offer. Greatness does what has not been done before and inspires the same courage that it requires. When we see it in others, we know it, and when we trust its presence in ourselves, we embody it. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Long experience has proven that The Program and Twelve Steps will work for any person who approaches it with an open mind. We have to remember that we can’t expect miracles overnight; after all, it took years to create the situation in which we find ourselves today. I’ll try to be receptive and to listen. I’ll try to e less hasty in drawing judgmental conclusions. I’ll hand on to the expectation that The Program can change my entire life as long as I give it a chance. Have I begun to realize that my ultimate contentment doesn’t depend on having things work out my way?
Today I Pray
I pray for a more receptive attitude; for a little more patience; a little less haste and more humility in my judgments. May I always understand that change will come — it will all happen — if I will listen for God’s will, God grant me perseverance, for sometimes I must wait a while for The Program’s Steps to take effect.
Today I Will Remember
Patience.
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One More Day
What is experience? A poor little hut constructed from the ruins of the palace of gold and marble called our illusion.
– Joseph Roux
Our youthful dreams of glory, adventure, and wealth have, for most of us, been unfulfilled, yet we are not disappointed. Childlike illusions that a meaningful life had to be based on excitement and power have give way to a maturity that values simpler, yet more important, goals.
Our long-ago need to importance was based on the judgment of others. We want other people to see our wealth, feel our power, possibly even envy our influence. Today, we seek our own approval. We value serenity, not adventure. Love, not envy. Acceptance, now power. We live with goals, not illusions.
I am thankful that my values are strong.
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One Day At A Time
SELF-RESPECT
“In his private heart ...
no man much respects himself.”
Mark Twain
I had no confidence or satisfaction in myself. I covered my lack of self-respect with absurd and harmful behaviors. I shielded myself from the respect and love of others by using these behaviors. I wanted to hide from the truth I knew - that I was behaving badly and dishonestly.
Having begun this program which restores us to sanity, we have stepped into a new realm of learning to love and respect ourselves. We have come to realize that we gain self-respect by working the Steps, surrendering ego, doing service for others, and relying on a Higher Power. Our lives become useful, our hearts are healed, and we are filled with respect for who we have become.
One day at a time ...
May I come to realize I am worthy of self-respect because I am doing the right things for the right reasons ... and giving credit to my Higher Power.
~ Judy N.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We asked especially for freedom from self-will, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why. - Pg. 87 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is important for us to think in the positive. It doesn't help to think 'I don't want to use, I don't want to use,' because we end up having to think of what we don't want to use. It stays on our mind. But if we think, 'I like having a clear mind; I like remembering; I like growing,' we have positive thoughts directed away from our diseases.
May my thoughts focus on what I'm working toward, not what I'm escaping from.
A Little Magic
Each day is a gift especially for me. I will look through innocent eyes at the world today and see the gifts that are meant just for me. Children think the sun rises for and because of them. They're sure that the moon hangs in the sky because they waved their arm towards the heavens. That flowers bloom for their eyes alone to see. They are magical thinkers. They take delight in the antics of a squirrel, in a balloon sailing in a bright, blue sky. They see the world fresh, in color and alive each new day, each new moment. They are constantly being surprised. Today, I think I'll borrow a little of their magic. Their magic and my maturity may just be a winning combination.
I believe anything is possible
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Do not become one of these people who have two excuses for everything: one excuse for what you don't do and another for what you don't have.
Excuses are simply my lack of faith in me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Encouragement from an old-timer can turn a newcomer's life around.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am willing to give away what I need for myself. I am willing to listen to someone else's problems. That way we will both see that we are traveling together on the same journey and are not alone.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My life is none of my business. I just suit up, show up; be an example of AA and leave the rest to God. - Sharon B.
bluidkiti
07-16-2015, 08:47 AM
July 17
Daily Reflections
SURRENDER AND SELF-EXAMINATION
My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that I receive. Thus I think it can work out with emotional sobriety. If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its consequent unhealthy demand. Let us, with God's help, continually surrender these hobbling demands. Then we can be set free to live and love; we may then be able to Twelfth Step ourselves and others into emotional sobriety.
THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 238
Years of dependency on alcohol as a chemical mood-changer deprived me of the capability to interact emotionally with my fellows. I thought I had to be self-sufficient, self-reliant, and self-motivated in a world of unreliable people. Finally I lost my self-respect and was left with dependency, lacking any ability to trust myself or to believe in anything. Surrender and self-examination while sharing with newcomers helped me to ask humbly for help.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
The new life of sobriety that we are learning to live in A.A. is slowly
growing on us and we are beginning to get some of that deep peace
of mind and serenity that we never thought were possible. At first we
may have doubted that this could happen to us, but after any
considerable length of time in A.A., looking at the happy faces
around us, we know that somehow it is happening to us . In
fact, it cannot help happening to anyone who takes the
A.A. program seriously day by day. Can I see my own happiness
reflected in the faces of others?
Meditation for the Day
God does not withhold His presence from you. He does not refuse to
reveal more of His truth to you. He does not hold back His spirit from
you. He does not withhold the strength that you need. His presence,
His truth, His spirit, His strength are always immediately available to
you, whenever you are fully willing to receive them. But they may be
blocked off by selfishness, intellectual pride, fear, greed, and
materialism. We must try to get rid of these blocks and let God's
spirit come in.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may remove all blocks that are keeping me from God. I
pray that I may let God come into my life with power.
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As Bill Sees It
Tell the Public?, p. 198
"A.A.'s of worldly prominence sometimes say, 'If I tell the public that I
am in Alcoholics Anonymous, then that will bring in many others.'
Thus they express the belief that our anonymity Tradition is wrong--at
least for them.
"They forget that, during their drinking days, prestige and the
achievement of worldly ambition were their principal aims. They do
not realize that, by breaking anonymity, they are unconsciously
pursuing those old and perilous illusions once more. They forget that
the keeping of one's anonymity often means a sacrifice of one's desire
for power, prestige, and money. They do not see that if these strivings
became general in A.A., the course of our whole history would be
changed; that we would be sowing the seeds of our own destruction as
a society.
"Yet I can happily report that while many of us are tempted--and I
have been one--few of us in America actually break our anonymity at
the public-media level."
Letter, 1958
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Walk In Dry Places
We never arrive
Finding Happiness.
We delude ourselves if we believe that our happiness and well-being will come when we reach a certain goal. Whatever happiness and well-being we obtain must come through the process of living in ordinary, everyday situations.
If we observe carefully, we'll find lots of happy people who are in situations or work that we might consider unpleasant. It is not the work or situation that creates happiness and fulfillment. What counts is the ATTITUDE toward it.
Those of us in 12 Step programs should have special insight into the issue of happiness. We tried to find it, here and now, in false ways. But it is available to us, here and now, in ordinary living.
I'll be happy today in knowing that I'm blessed with the ordinary tasks of life.
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Keep It Simple
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.---Marie Curie
We have many sides, some good, and some bad. Maybe we're afraid to see our faults. But we don't need to be afraid. After all, we need to know our dark side before we can change it. When we see ourselves clearly, we can stop our dark side from causing trouble.
When we shine light on our fears and secrets, we'll begin to feel better about ourselves. We'll feel more safe about sharing our worries. The more honest we are with ourselves and others, the better and stronger we become. The goodness and love in us will blossom. We have a Higher Power and a program to help us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be brave enough to see myself clearly. Gently teach me to see who I really am. Help me know enough to stay sober today.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll look myself in the eyes. I'll spend two minutes looking into my eyes in a mirror. I'll talk to my sponsor about what I see.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The problem is not merely one of woman and career, woman and the home, woman and independence. It is more basically: how to remain whole in the midst of the distractions of life; how to remain balanced, no matter what centrifugal forces tend to pull one off center; how to remain strong, no matter what shocks come in at the periphery and tend to crack the hub of the wheel. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Before getting into this recovery program, many of us didn't cope with life's distractions except with the help of our addiction. We had no sense of wholeness and were constantly bouncing from one crisis to another. We may still feel pulled. The crises may still trip us up. But we have a center now that we are beginning to understand and rely upon. That center is our spiritual selves.
Slowing down, going within to our center, listening to the message therein, unravels our problem, smooths the waves of the storm. The strength to go forward awaits us.
We can absorb the shocks that "crack the hub of the wheel" and be enriched by them. Each moment we are weaving our tapestry of life. Each experience colors our design. Our pain and sorrow and joy give the depth that one-day will move us to say, "I see, I understand."
I will be grateful for the experiences today that give my tapestry its beauty.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Usually the family should not try to tell your story. When possible, avoid meeting a man through his family. Approach through a doctor or an institution is a better bet. If your man needs hospitalization, he should have it, but not forcibly unless he is violent. Let the doctor, if he will, tell him he has something in the way of a solution.
p. 91
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
Years earlier, I had gone into psychoanalysis to get relief. I spent 5 1/2 years in psychoanalysis and proceeded to become a drunk. I don't mean that in any sense as a derogatory statement about psychotherapy; it's a very great tool, not too potent, but a great took. I would do it again.
p. 305
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
What are we likely to receive from Step Five? For one thing, we shall get rid of that terrible sense of isolation we've always had. Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we didn't quite belong. Either we were shy, and dared not draw near others, or we were apt to be noisy good fellows craving attention and companionship, but never getting it--at least to our way of thinking. There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand. It was as if we were actors on a stage, suddenly realizing that we did not know a single line of our parts. That's one reason we loved alcohol too well. It did let us act extemporaneously. But even Bacchus boomeranged on us; we were finally struck down and left in terrified loneliness.
p. 57
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With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
--Daisaku Ikeda
This is the way of peace. Overcome evil with good. Falsehood with truth, And hatred with love.
--Peace Pilgrim
"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world."
--George Bernard Shaw
The purpose of man is in action not thought.
--Thomas Carlyle
Thanks, but I won't need your help today.
--GOD
To attain Knowledge, add things every day. To attain Wisdom, remove things every day.
--Lao Tzu
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
NEGATIVITY
"My life has been nothing but a
failure."
--Claude Monet
I can identify with Claude Monet because for years I considered myself a complete failure. For years I wallowed on my pity-pot until it became too painful. Whatever the "pay-off" was in the previous years had dried up, and I was left with a rock bottom pain that forced me to consider the alternative: I needed to set about doing something to change things!
Astounding! Impossible! How could this ever be? I was forever to be a victim of alcoholism. "Not so." I heard a voice of hope from a recovering alcoholic who had made the change. Slowly I took small steps towards recovery and self-esteem.
I am a failure so long as I consider myself a failure. I am what I create in my life. God requires my cooperation to make miracles in my life. My decision to listen to those who had achieved sobriety provided the seeds for my recovery today. I wonder if Claude Monet was an alcoholic who never heard the words of hope?
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The joy of the Lord is your strength.
Nehemiah 8:10
At the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven,
and of those on earth, and of those under the earth.
Phil. 2:10
"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with
God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality."
Romans 12:12-13
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Daily Inspiration
Share the lighthearted moments of your life with others. Lord, may I be instrumental in relieving tensions by lifting the spirits of others with a little cheerfulness.
Be a patient person but, most of all, be patient with yourself. Lord, may I be blessed with a calm spirit and diligence as I do my work today.
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NA Just For Today
Using Our "Using Dreams"
"Do we fully accept the fact that our every attempt to stop using or to control our using failed?"
Basic Text, p. 18
The room is dark. Your forehead is bathed in cold sweat. Your heart is racing. You open your eyes, sure that you've just blown your clean time. You've had a "using dream", and it was just like being there-the people, the places, the routine, the sick feeling in your stomach, everything. It takes a few moments to realize it was just a nightmare, that it didn't actually happen. Slowly, you settle down and return to sleep.
The next morning is the time to examine what really happened the night before. You didn't use last night - but how close are you to using today? Do you have any illusions about your ability to control your using? Do you know, without a doubt, what would happen once you took the first drug? What stands between you and a real, live relapse? How strong is your program? Your relationships with your sponsor, your home group, and your Higher Power?
Using dreams don't necessarily indicate a hole in our program; for a drug addict, there's nothing more natural than to dream of using drugs. Some of us think of using dreams as gifts from our Higher Power, vividly reminding us of the insanity of active addiction and encouraging us to strengthen our recovery. Seen in that light, we can be grateful for using dreams. Frightening as they are, they can prove to be great blessings - if we use them to reinforce our recovery.
Just for today: I will examine my personal program. I will talk with my sponsor about what I find, and seek ways to strengthen my recovery.
pg. 207
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When you feel rejected, start accepting yourself, and then go out and accept someone. --Sondra Ray
There was once a mother who felt rejected when her children grew up and needed to separate from her. She felt hurt when they pushed her away and no longer wanted all the love and caring that she wanted to give them. She thought, What's wrong with me?
Encouraged by her friends, she began to ask herself another question: What's right with me? The more answers she found to that question, the better she liked herself. The better she liked herself, the more she was able to see her children's need to separate from her as their own natural and healthy urge for independence, and not the result of her shortcomings.
Our good points may seem undesirable to others, but that's not our fault. Sometimes, too much of a good thing can be inappropriate, but that doesn't make it bad.
What's right with me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I loafe and invite my soul, I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass. --Walt Whitman
How foreign the thought is to many men that we might make progress by loafing. Yet we probably have experienced it. We have felt more in tune with ourselves after taking a break. After an especially relaxing weekend we feel more alive or clearer about ourselves. At those times we have invited our soul and have been rejuvenated.
Centuries of spiritual practice from different ideologies have taught the need for quiet relaxation in some form to invite the soul. Some have practiced a Sabbath day each week, others a time of prayer every day - even several times a day - others have practiced a daily period of deep meditation. Simply a period of loafing, with no particular goal in mind, may invite conscious contact with our Higher Power.
I pray for the ability to set aside my busy pace of life, my worrying and fretting, my "take charge" attitude for a period of time today.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The problem is not merely one of woman and career, woman and the home, woman and independence. It is more basically: how to remain whole in the midst of the distractions of life; how to remain balanced, no matter what centrifugal forces tend to pull one off center; how to remain strong, no matter what shocks come in at the periphery and tend to crack the hub of the wheel. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Before getting into this recovery program, many of us didn't cope with life's distractions except with the help of our addiction. We had no sense of wholeness and were constantly bouncing from one crisis to another. We may still feel pulled. The crises may still trip us up. But we have a center now that we are beginning to understand and rely upon. That center is our spiritual selves.
Slowing down, going within to our center, listening to the message therein, unravels our problem, smooths the waves of the storm. The strength to go forward awaits us.
We can absorb the shocks that "crack the hub of the wheel" and be enriched by them. Each moment we are weaving our tapestry of life. Each experience colors our design. Our pain and sorrow and joy give the depth that one-day will move us to say, "I see, I understand."
I will be grateful for the experiences today that give my tapestry its beauty.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Love, in Words and Actions
Many of us have confused notions about what it means to be loved and cared about.
Many of us were loved and cared for by people who had discrepancies between what they said and did.
We may have had a mother or father who said, "I love you" to us, and then abandoned or neglected us, giving us confused ideas about love. Thus that pattern feels like love - the only love we knew.
Some of us may have been cared for by people who provided for our needs and said they loved us, but simultaneously abused or mistreated us. That, then, becomes our idea of love.
Some of us many have lived in emotionally sterile environments, where people said they loved us, but no feelings or nurturing were available. That may have become our idea of love.
We may learn to love others or ourselves the way we have been loved, or we may let others love us the way we have been loved, whether or not that feels good. It's time to let our needs be met in ways that actually work. Unhealthy love may meet some surface needs, but not our need to be loved.
We can come to expect congruency in behavior from others. We can diminish the impact of words alone and insist that behavior and words match.
We can find the courage, when appropriate, to confront discrepancies in words and actions - not to shame, blame, or find fault, but to help us stay in touch with reality and with our needs.
We can give and receive love where behavior matches one's words. We deserve to receive and give the best that love has to offer.
Today, I will be open to giving and receiving the healthiest love possible. I will watch for discrepancies between words and behaviors that confuse me and make me feel crazy. When that happens, I will understand that I am not crazy; I am in the midst of a discrepancy.
God gives me all the answers I need at the right time. Today I trust that it is okay not to know everything and that I will know when the time is right. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Put Yourself on Equal Ground
I sat in the booth across from my friend. I was fiddling with an empty soda can in front of me while we discussed the subject of power. Suddenly he snatched the can away from me and began tossing it in the air, catching it, then tossing it up again. “See how easy it is to take your power?” he said. “See how you just gave it to me?”
I watched, amazed at how quickly I had relinquished my power, how vulnerable I was to the world around me.
Then my friend smiled and stopped juggling the can. “Relax,” he said. “It’s an illusion. That’s not really your power– it’s an empty can. And it’s an illusion that anyone can take your power away from you.”
Each of us has an unlimited supply of power available– the power to think, to feel, to take care of ourselves. The power to open our hearts, love, be gentle, honest, and kind. We each have the power to be clear and to trust and follow the guidance of our own hearts.
Part of our journey to freedom, an important part, is equalizing our relationships. For many years, we may have believed the scales were tipped one way or the other in our work and love relationships. We may have believed that others knew a great deal more than we did, or we may have begun to believe that we had all the answers. But no one has our power. That’s an illusion. So much so that sometimes the person we believe is more powerful than us may be looking at us thinking we’re the ones pulling the strings.
Remember, if you give up your power or decide that someone has power over you, you’ll begin grousing, sabotaging, and doing sneaky little things to equalize that relationship, to feel like you have your power. There’s another way, a better way, one that will help you heal.
Put yourself on equal ground.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Relief is around the bend
I needed to go into the city for errands. It was a chilly morning at the beach, not even 70 degrees. I put on my jacket, got in the car, and headed out. I made the turn onto the canyon road and was struck by the beauty of the fog burning off, playing peekaboo with the canyon walls. It was 94 and sunny when I arrived in town.
I ran my errands and stopped at In and Out Burger for lunch. When I got back in the car, the thermometer read 102. It was hot. Traffic was bad, the temperature reached 106 on the freeway, and even the air conditioning didn’t help much.
Finally, I turned back onto the canyon road. The grass was brown and I worried about wildfires– they get so bad here. Soon, I noticed the temperature was down to 94 again, then 90, then 88. The hills turned green. I rounded a corner and could see the Pacific Ocean. The temp was 82. By the time I made it home it was back to 74.
I was surprised at the big difference a few miles made.
Sometimes, a small change can impact the way we’re feeling– a lot. Feeling overwhelmed or pressured? Do something else for a while. Give yourself a treat. Sometimes, the smallest change in our routine can do wonders to change the temperature in our lives.
God, help me see any changes I can make that will have a positive effect on my energy and on the way I feel.
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Food for Thought
The Narrow Path
Abstinence is the narrow path that leads out of the swamp of compulsive overeating. If we allow ourselves to deviate from the path, we immediately put ourselves on slippery ground and run the risk of falling into a bog of quicksand.
The longer we maintain firm abstinence, the more sure our steps become as we walk away from the crippling effects of our disease. It is so much easier to stay on the narrow path than to slip off and have to find it again. Without abstinence, we compulsive overeaters are lost.
If abstinence is not the most important thing in our lives, then food becomes our number one priority, and we gradually destroy ourselves.
Guide my steps, I pray, on the narrow path of abstinence.
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Becoming Whole Again
The Process of Grieving by Madisyn Taylor
Grief can arise from many life situations, but know it is not a permanent state of being.
When we experience any kind of devastating loss, whether it is the loss of a loved one, a dream, or a relationship, feelings may arise within us that are overwhelming or difficult to cope with. This sense of grief can also come up when we are separated from anyone or anything we have welcomed into our lives. And while it may feel like we are caught up in a never-ending spiral of sadness and emptiness, it is important to remember that the grief we are feeling is not a permanent state of being. Rather, grief is part of the process of letting go that in many ways can be a gift, allowing us to go deeper within ourselves to rediscover the light amidst the seeming darkness.
The emotions that accompany any kind of loss can be intense and varied. A sense of shock or denial is often the first reaction, to be replaced by anger. Sometimes this anger can be directed at your loved one for “abandoning” you; at other times you may feel outrage toward the universe for what you are enduring. And while there are stages of grief that people go through – moving from denial to anger to bargaining to depression to acceptance – the cycles of grief often move in spirals, sometimes circling forward and then back again. You may even experience moments of strength, faith, and laughter in between. While these emotions seem to come and go sporadically, it is important to feel them, accept them, and allow them to flow. With time, patience, and compassion, you will eventually find your center again.
As we move through our grief, we may find ourselves reluctant to release our pain, fearing we are letting go of who or what we have lost. We may even regard our movement toward healing as an act of disloyalty or giving up. Know that while the hurt may fade, the essence of what you had and who you loved will have already transformed you and forever stay with you. If anything, once you are ready for the pain of your loss to subside, their memories can then live more fully within you. Remember, that healing is a part of the spiraling cycles of grief, and that in letting yourself feel restored again, you are surrendering to a natural movement that is part of the dance of life. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
For my own good, I’ll go to meetings and participate in discussions with an open mind that’s ready to receive and accept new ideas. For my own peace and comfort, I’ll determinedly try to apply those new ideas to my own life. I’ll remember that The Program offers me the instruction and support I can’t find elsewhere. I’ll seek out others who understand my problems, and I’ll accept their guidance in matters which cause me discomfort and confusion. Will I try to be willing to listen — and to share?
Today I Pray
Thank you, God, for bringing The Program into my life, and with it a better understanding of Divine Power. Help me to remember that attendance and attentiveness at meetings are all-important to continuing in this happily-discovered way of life. May I listen and share with honesty, open-mindedness and willingness.
Today I Will Remember
Her’s HOW; honesty, open-mindedness, willingness.
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One More Day
A thing of beauty is a joy forever: Its loveliness increases; it will never Pass into nothingness.
– John Keats
We know a work of fine art can only increase in value. As the years pass by, art develops character lines which further define and highlight its beauty.
We wonder about people. There is grace which comes with age, we know, but how can people last forever? The answer, of course, is what do not. But all that we comprise and create — the love, the caring, the storytelling, the things we make with our hands — will endure forever. Just as enduring, and perhaps even more value, is the respect we give to our family and traditions. These and other family heirlooms are our assurance that no one or no thing passes into nothingness.
I am comforted by the traditions of family and faith and by the meaningfulness they add to my life.
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One Day At A Time
LIVING RIGHT
“Life is not a matter of having good cards
.... but of playing a poor hand well.”
Robert Louis Stevenson
There are many things in this world we have no control over, such as: our gender, our stature, our race, or physical abnormalities. But we always have the power to choose how we deal with events and circumstances. We can always take the right action ~ if it is not predicated on achieving a favorable outcome.
The Big Book tells us that it is a "well-understood fact that in God's sight all human beings are important, the proof that love freely given surely brings a full return."
I must ask myself ~
One day at a time ...
Am I living properly?
Am I living properly today?
Am I really trying at all?
~ Jeremiah ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Some of our alcoholic readers may think they can do without spiritual help. Let us tell you the rest of the conversation our friend had with his doctor.
The doctor said: 'You have the mind of a chronic alcoholic. I have never seen one single case recover, where that state of mind existed to the extent that it does in you.' Our friend felt as though the gates of hell had closed on him with a clang.
He said to the doctor, 'Is there no exception?'
'Yes,' replied the doctor, 'there is. Exceptions to cases such as yours have been occurring since early times. Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements adn rearrangements. Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them. - Pg. 27 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now you are safe. Whatever is troubling you is not so bad that your sponsor or another group member cannot help. Call them as soon as you find a phone.
Grant me the humbleness to call for help whenever I feel threatened, lonely, angry, or in any way separated from my spiritual health.
Feeling Good Inside
I am in the present, I can actually see what the next right action might be and I can take it seamlessly, easily, fruitfully. I will see my day as an opportunity to grow; to learn to allow more of who I am to flow through me. Naturally, quietly and without force. I will become worthy of the life I have been given, grateful just to be alive for one more day. I will let life work out.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
No God; No Peace. Know God; Know Peace.
My program teaches me that I will have peace of mind in the exact proportion of the peace of mind I bring into the lives of others.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Relax, God is in charge.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
God gives me all the answers I need at the right time. Today I trust that it is okay not to know everything and that I will know when the time is right.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If I was at your house, I'd ask to use the bathroom and I'd go through the medicine cabinet and take whatever's there. I don't need to know what it is. Sometimes I'd be up for days, saying the same thing over and over, chewing my tongue. Other times I'd be falling down, bouncing off the walls. Sometimes I'd get real 'regular'. And I probably took enough pills out of those wheels that there's no chance I'm going to get pregnant this century. - Bob D.
bluidkiti
07-17-2015, 08:42 AM
July 18
Daily Reflections
GRATEFUL FOR WHAT I HAVE, p.208
During this process of learning more about humility, the most profound result of all was the change in our attitude toward God.
12 & 12, p. 75
Today my prayers consist mostly of saying thank you to my Higher Power for my sobriety and for the wonder of God's abundance, but I need also to ask for help and the power to carry out His will for me. I no longer need God each minute to rescue me from the situations I get myself into by not doing His will. Now my gratitude seems to be directly linked to humility. As long as I have the humility to be grateful for what I have, God continues to provide for me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Two things can spoil group unity--gossip and criticism. To avoid these divisive things, we must realize that we're all in the same boat. We're like a group of people in a life-boat after the steamer has sunk. If we're going to be saved, we've got to pull together. It's a matter of life or death for us. Gossip and criticism are sure ways of disrupting any A.A. group. We're all in A.A. to keep sober ourselves and to help each other to keep sober. And neither gossip nor criticism helps anyone to stay sober. Am I guilty of gossip or criticism?
Meditation For The Day
We should try to be grateful for all the blessings we have received and which we do not deserve. Gratitude to God for all His blessings will make us humble. Remember that we could do little by ourselves, and now we must rely largely on God's grace in helping ourselves and others. People do not care much for those who are smug and self-satisfied or those who gossip and criticize. But people are impressed by true humility. So we should try to walk humbly at all times. Gratitude to God and true humility are what make us effective.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may walk humbly with God. I pray that I may rely on His grace to carry me through.
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As Bill Sees It
Arrogance and Its Opposite, p. 199
A very tough-minded prospect was taken to his first A.A. meeting,
where two speakers (or maybe lecturers) themed their talks on "God
as I understand Him." Their attitude oozed arrogance. In fact, the
final speaker got far overboard on his personal theological convictions.
Both were repeating my performance of years before. Implicit in
everything they said was the same idea: "Folks, listen to us. We have
the only true brand of A.A. -- and you'd better get it!
The new prospect said he'd had it -- and he had. His sponsor protested
that this wasn't real A.A. But it was too late; nobody could touch him
after that.
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I see "humility for today" as a safe and secure stance midway
between violent emotional extremes. It is a quiet place where I can
keep enough perspective and enough balance to take my next small
step up the clearly marked road that points toward eternal values.
Grapevine
1. April, 1961
2. June, 1961
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Walk In Dry Places
What is a new freedom?
Release
We're promised a "new freedom" in the 12 Step program. How does this differ from the "old freedom" we've known?
The new freedom is an inner feeling of release from the bondage of compulsion. We are no longer serving as our own jailers. We are free from useless things that have held us back. Think of the burdens we had assumed by fearing others, by holding grudges, by having needless regrets.
This new freedom has nothing to do with political or civil liberties, which we hope to enjoy as our birthright. But nobody can give us freedom if we are locked into compulsions that bind us. We must seek the new freedom within ourselves.
Throughout the day, I'll think of myself as a completely free person. I'm free at last from the bondage I imposed upon myself.
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Keep It Simple
It takes twenty years to become an overnight success.---Eddie Cantor
Successful people make life look easy. But it's not. Years of hard work, trial and error, and learning probably went on into each success. The key is this: We must choose to do what we really like. If we want to be successful, we'll have to work at it. We'll have letdowns, and we'll get bored at times. But we'll be happy because we're doing what we want, what we know is best for us. Real success has to do with our own happiness.
In our programs, we'll meet many successful people. They've worked hard at recovery, and they are still learning. And they're happy to share their success with us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for the success the program has already given me.
Action for the Day: I'll list three ways I know I am a success today. Number one: I'm sober!
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Each Day a New Beginning
Have the courage to act instead of react. --Darlene Larson Jenks
Taking the time to be thoughtful about our responses to the situations we encounter offers us the freedom to make choices that are right for us. Impulsive behavior can be a thing of our past, if we so choose. It seldom was the best response for our well being.
Decision-making is morale boosting. It offers us a chance to exercise our personal powers, an exercise that is mandatory for the healthy development of our egos. We need to make careful, thoughtful choices because they will further define our characters. Each action we take clearly indicates the persons we are becoming. When we have consciously and deliberately chosen that action because of its rightness for us, we are fully in command of becoming the persons we choose to be.
Our actions reveal who we are, to others and ourselves. We need never convey an inaccurate picture of ourselves. We need only take the time and risk the courage necessary to behave exactly as we choose. We will know a new freedom when we are in control.
I will exercise my power to act and feel the fullness of my being.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
When your man is better, the doctor might suggest a visit from you. Though you have talked with the family, leave them out of the first discussion. Under these conditions your prospect will see he is under not pressure. He will feel he can deal with you without being nagged by his family. Call on him while he is still jittery. He may be more receptive when depressed.
p. 91
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
I tried every gimmick that there was to get some peace of mind, but it was not until I was brought to my alcoholic knees, when I was brought to a group in my own community with the butcher the baker, the carpenter, and the mechanic, who were able to give me the Twelve Steps, that I was finally given some semblance of an answer to the last half of the First Step. So, after taking the first half of the First Step, and very gingerly admitting myself to Alcoholics Anonymous, something happened. And then I thought to myself: Imagine an alcoholic admitting anything! But I made my admission just the same.
pp. 305-306
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
When we reached A.A., and for the first time in our lives stood among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging was tremendously exciting. We thought the isolation problem had been solved. But we soon discovered that while we weren't alone any more in a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious partners. Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn't belong. Step Five was the answer. It was the beginning of true kinship with man and God.
p. 57
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Seldom will we remember next week what bothers us so much today.
--Karen Casey
Words that enlighten the soul are more precious than jewels.
--Hazrat Inayat Khan
"There is no failure except in no longer trying."
--Elbert Hubbard
"The impossible is often the untried."
--Jim Goodwin
"There is no point at which you can say, `Well, I'm successful now. I might as well take a nap.'"
--Carrie Fisher
Present-moment living, getting in touch with your "now," is at the heart of effective living. When you think about it, there really is no other moment you can live. Now is all there is, and the future is just another present moment to live when it arrives. One thing is certain, you cannot live it until it does appear.
--Wayne Dyer
Man Plans..... God Laughs!
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
VOCATION
"It is well for a man to respect his
own vocation, whatever it is, and
to think himself bound to uphold it
and to claim for it the respect it
deserves."
--Charles Dickens
Nobody else is quite like me. Nobody else can view the world, experience the world, feel the world in the way I can. I am the center of the universe. Other people can love -- but it is not the same as my love. Other people can offer the hand of friendship -- but it is not the same as the friendship that I can offer. Other people can utter a kind word -- but the phrasing of my words belong to me. I am unique and I must remember that. Even my space in the world is special. Nobody can take up the place that I have on the earth; you cannot get into my space. We may both be looking at the same scene, but I see it from my place in the world. Today I respect my uniqueness.
Let me continue to discover something of Your unique image in my life.
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Call upon me in the day of trouble, I will deliver you, and you will honor me.
Psalm 50:15
"Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. So we know and believe the love God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in him."
I John 4:15-16
If it seems that we are crazy, it is to bring glory to God. And if we are in our right minds, it is for your benefit. Whatever we do, it is because Christ's love controls us. Since we believe that Christ died for everyone, we also believe that we have all died to the old life we used to live.
2 Cor 5:13-14
You can make many plans, but the LORD's purpose will prevail.
Prov. 19:21
Human plans, no matter how wise or well advised, cannot stand against the LORD.
Prov. 20:31
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Daily Inspiration
Share the lighthearted moments of your life with others. Lord, may I be instrumental in relieving tensions by lifting the spirits of others with a little cheerfulness.
We are as weak as our fears and as strong as our faith. Lord, with Your help, I can do.
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NA Just For Today
The Gift Of Desperation
"Our disease always resurfaced or continued to progress until, in desperation, we sought help from each other in Narcotics Anonymous."
Basic Text, p. 13
When we think of being desperate, we envision an undesirable state: a poor, bedraggled soul frantically clawing at something sorely needed, a desperate look in the eyes. We think of hunted animals, hungry children, and of ourselves before we found NA.
Yet it was the desperation we felt before coming to NA that compelled us to accept the First Step. We were fresh out of ideas, and so became open to new ones. Our insanity had finally risen higher than our wall of denial, forcing us to get honest about our disease. Our best efforts at control had only worn us out; hence, we became willing to surrender. We had received the gift of desperation and, as a result, were able to accept the spiritual principles that make it possible for us to recover.
Desperation is what finally drives many of us to ask for help. Once we've reached this state, we can turn around and start anew. Just as the desperate, hunted animal seeks a safe haven, so do we: in Narcotics Anonymous.
Just for today: The gift of desperation has helped me become honest, open-minded, and willing. I am grateful for this gift because it has made my recovery possible.
pg. 208
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The great end of life is not knowledge but action. --Thomas Huxley
Sometimes we have good ideas about how to make things better. We might know we need to spend more quality time with others. We might know it would be better if mealtime was not so hectic and really became a time for sharing the day's events. Knowing what needs to happen is part of the process of change. But we have to put that knowledge into action.
All our good intentions, no matter what they may be, do not really mean anything until we move into action. A hug is better than a thought of love; a story read together is better than a wonderful vacation that did not get past the planning stage, just as a finished house is something we can live in, while the blueprint is soon forgotten. When we act on our ideas, we put ourselves into the world as a force for change.
What change can I set loose in the world today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
How should one live? Live welcoming to all. --Mechtild of Magdeburg
Welcoming is a spiritual practice we met when we came to this program. We may recall our first meetings and how welcome we felt in this group of fellow sufferers. It gave us hope when we felt desperate and continues to provide us with a nourishing place to grow.
To be welcoming means to accept others as they are, without passing judgment on their worth. It means to encourage them when they are despairing and to accept that they have a rightful place in our world. Welcoming is being generous with our resources. We do not have to feel close to someone to be welcoming. We can welcome a stranger. As we practice this attitude toward others, regardless of their status in life, regardless of their good or bad actions, we are changed inside. We learn from the people we welcome, and we are reminded that in the sight of God we are all loved as equals.
Today, 1 will practice a welcoming attitude toward everyone I meet.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Have the courage to act instead of react. --Darlene Larson Jenks
Taking the time to be thoughtful about our responses to the situations we encounter offers us the freedom to make choices that are right for us. Impulsive behavior can be a thing of our past, if we so choose. It seldom was the best response for our well being.
Decision-making is morale boosting. It offers us a chance to exercise our personal powers, an exercise that is mandatory for the healthy development of our egos. We need to make careful, thoughtful choices because they will further define our characters. Each action we take clearly indicates the persons we are becoming. When we have consciously and deliberately chosen that action because of its rightness for us, we are fully in command of becoming the persons we choose to be.
Our actions reveal who we are, to others and ourselves. We need never convey an inaccurate picture of ourselves. We need only take the time and risk the courage necessary to behave exactly as we choose. We will know a new freedom when we are in control.
I will exercise my power to act and feel the fullness of my being.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Time to Get Angry
It's about time you got angry - yes, that angry.
Anger can be such a potent, frightening emotion. It can also be a feeling that guides us to important decisions, sometimes decisions difficult to make. It can signal other people's problems, our problems, or simply problems we need to address.
We deny our anger for a variety of reasons. We don't give ourselves permission to allow it to come into our awareness - at first. Understand that it does not go away; it sits in layers under the surface, waiting for us to become ready, safe, and strong enough to deal with it.
What we may do instead of facing our anger and what it is telling us about self-care, is feel hurt, victimized, trapped, guilty, and uncertain about how to take care of ourselves. We may withdraw, deny, make excuses, and hide our heads in the sand - for a while.
We may punish, get even, whine, and wonder.
We may repeatedly forgive the other person for behaviors that hurt us. We may be afraid that someone will go away if we deal with our anger toward him or her. We may be afraid we will need to go away, if we deal with our anger.
We may simply be afraid of our anger and the potency of it. We may not know we have a right, even a responsibility - to ourselves - to allow ourselves to feel and learn from our anger.
God, help my hidden or repressed angry feelings to surface. Help me have the courage to face them. Help me understand how I need to take care of myself with the people I feel anger toward. Help me stop telling myself something is wrong with me when people victimize me and I feel angry about the victimization. I can trust my feelings to signal problems that need my attention.
Fears sometimes still lingers in my mind. I can be okay when that happens. I can feel them through and talk about them and go on in spite of them, not letting myself picture the worst, but seeing the results in a positive light. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Find the Humor in It
I called home from me trip to talk to my friend. He was taking care of Max, my African Grey parrot, while I went on this journey. How’s Max?” I asked. “Is she doing okay?”
“Well,” he said, “she’s a little confused. I’ve got her outside on the patio. She says hi to all the sea gulls that come by and she can’t figure out why they won’t talk back to her.”
My parrot makes me smile. My friend makes me laugh. I have many friends that make me smile. Together, we laugh a lot. Learning to laugh, learning to find humor either in what we’re going through, or despite it, it is a powerful tool on this journey.
Cherish the gift of humor. Life doesn’t need to be so gloomy. Spirituality doesn’t need to be so serious and somber. Work doesn’t need to be that way either. Learn to see the humor in life. Look for it. Find it. Enjoy it. Surround yourself with people who like to laugh. Being around people who laugh can open us to the power of humor in our own lives. Laughter can become contagious. There is something magnetic, something healing about being around people who let themselves laugh often.
There is no situation in life that can’t be improved by laughter. Sometimes humor can help us get through situations we couldn’t possibly endure without it. Sometimes laughter isn’t superfluous, it’s essential.
Sometimes laughter is the next lesson we need to be learning.
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More Language Of Letting Go
It’s our lesson
When you learn your lessons, the pain goes away.
–Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, The Wheel of Life
Sometimes, we wait and wait for a painful situation to end. When will he stop drinking? When will she call? When will this financial stuff get better? When will I know what to do next?
Life has its own timeline. As soon as we get the lesson, the pain neutralizes, then disappears.
And the lesson is always ours.
Examine your life. Are you waiting for someone or something outside of you to happen to make you feel better? Are you waiting for someone to learn his or her lesson for your pain to stop? If you are, try turning inward. See what the lesson really is.
God, please show me what I’m supposed to be learning right now.
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In God’s Care
Imagination has always had powers of resurrection that no science can match.
~~Ingrid Bengis
Our ability to create an image of ourselves – successfully handling a conflict with a friend or stranger; growing in confidence regarding our role as parent, worker, or friend; communicating frequently with our Higher Power – is a tool that can enhance our sense of well-being throughout every moment of the twenty-four hours that lie ahead.
How lucky we are to have the ability to think what we want to think and to visualize situations that will bring us pleasure. God is in control of the outcomes of our life, but we’re in control of our contributions towad those outcomes. And one way we contribute most productively is by thinking positively and imagining ourselves fulfilled and content through our acts of love toward others.
My Higher Power and I are in partnership in the outcomes of my life.
I know how to fulfill my part, and I can trust God to fulfill God’s part.
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Day By Day
Practicing sanity
When we were getting high all the time, we were practicing insanity. It was a lot of fun. We got so good at it, however, that we couldn’t see how serious it had become. Whether we’re straight or high, insanity seemed to take over.
Now we can practice sanity daily. Practicing anything will eventually make us pretty good at it. With the grace of God, we can get pretty good at sanity too.
Am I letting go of my insane behavior?
Higher Power, help me face the fears of sane living, fears I tried to hide from with addiction.
Today I will reflect on my unresolved problem behaviors by…
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Food for Thought
Don’t Jump
When we have achieved a significant period of abstinence from compulsive overeating, it is as though we have slowly climbed many flights of stairs all the way up to the top floor of a skyscraper. Telling ourselves that we will make a small exception and break abstinence just one time is like saying we will jump out a window on the top floor of the skyscraper and fall down only as far as the next floor.
The nature of our disease is such that one small compulsive bite inevitably leads to eventual disaster. We may be able to postpone the binge for a day or a week or even longer, but once we give up our control, we put ourselves in a pattern of downward descent.
All we need do in order to stay on the top floor of the skyscraper is to maintain our abstinence. A small price to pay for such a magnificent view!
Protect me from a fatal jump.
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Grounding Ourselves
Being a Strong Container by Madisyn Taylor
As a human being living on earth it is important to learn to ground yourself in relation to your earth mother.
We often hear people telling us to ground ourselves, but we may not be sure what that means and how we might do it. Grounding ourselves is a way of bringing ourselves literally back to earth. Some of us are more prone than others to essentially leaving our bodies and not being firmly rooted in our bodies. There’s nothing terribly wrong with this, but while we are living on the earth plane it is best to stay grounded in the body.
One of the easiest ways to ground ourselves is to bring our attention to our breath as it enters and leaves our bodies. After about 10 breaths, we will probably find that we feel much more connected to our physical selves. We might then bring our awareness to the sensations in our bodies, moving from our head down to our feet, exploring and inquiring. Just a few minutes of this can bring us home to bodies and to the earth, and this is what it means to ground ourselves.
We can go further by imagining that we have roots growing out of the bottoms of our feet, connecting us to the earth. The roots flow with us so we can we always move, but at the same time they keep us grounded. We receive powerful energy from the earth just as we do from the forms of energy we associate with the sky, and our body is a tool that brings these two energies together in a sacred union. When we are grounded, we essentially become a strong container in which our spirits can safely and productively dwell. This is why grounding ourselves every day, especially at the beginning of the day, is such a beneficial practice. Fortunately, it’s as simple as bringing our conscious awareness to our bodies and the earth on which we walk. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Very few of us know what we really want, and none of us knows what is best for us. That knowledge is in the hands of God. This is a fact I must ultimately accept, in spite of my rebelliousness and stubborn resistance. From this day forward, I’ll limit my prayers to request for guidance, and open mind to receive it, and the strength to act upon it. To the best of my capability, I’ll defer all decisions until my contact with my Higher Power has made is seemingly apparent that the decisions are right for me. Do I “bargain” with my Higher Power, assuming that I know what’s best for me?
Today I Pray
May I not try to make pacts with God. Instead, may I be a vessel, open to whatever inspiration He wishes to put into me. I pray that I will remember that God’s decisions are better for me than my own fumbling plans, and that they w8ill come to me at the times I need them.
Today I Will Remember
I will not bargain with God.
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One More Day
Who controls the past controls the future; who controls the present controls the past.
– George Orwell
We planned on being healthy, on always being healthy, so our adjustment to less than optimal health can be quite difficult. Until we get our priorities back in gear, it can seem as though the scales are just not tipping in our favor.
Life can feel overwhelming when we foresee no apparent reprieve form our pain and inconvenience. It takes a while sometimes to learn to lviee with a health problem, but we can do it. With time we gain insight. Our lives are in our control once again.
We are responsible for ourselves, although sometimes we may forget that fact. Once we get a firm hold on our emotions, on our new set of problems, we understand that we still make the decisions for ourselves.
I can make positive decisions that alter the path of my life.
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One Day At A Time
WHO AM I?
“Pleased to meet you ...
hope you guess my name.”
Mick Jagger
I am a compulsive overeater. When I first returned to program after years of relapse, that was all I was. I was a tortured body filled with sugar and fat; anger and hatred. I was a compulsive overeater who was out of control, obese and unhealthy. I was a compulsive overeater dying a slow, horrible and deliberate death. I was on my way to shutting myself off from the world, my family, my husband and myself. I was a compulsive overeater who was losing her grip on the will to live.
Then I came back to program, reached out again, and said simply, “Help me.” I found support, love, acceptance and friendship from people who had never seen me or known me. But the fact that I was a stranger to them did not matter. They cared about one thing only: I was a human being reaching out for help. That was all that mattered to them.
After about a month of recovery something changed in me. I became a compulsive overeater in recovery. I was on a fantastic journey towards a new, healthy and brighter life. I was a compulsive overeater with a future, although I did not -- and still do not -- know what that future is. Most importantly, I was a compulsive overeater who realized it's okay to not know what lies ahead. In fact, there is no choice in the matter; it was out of my control. I never had control in the first place. It was all an illusion. When I realized that many things are simply out of my control, I surrendered my useless struggling and accepted the help offered by my new program family and my Higher Power.
I am still a compulsive overeater in recovery and I always will be. But I am so very much more than that. I am one of those people who is reaching out to others in the hope that I can be of help to people who suffer from this disease. I am a person of faith. I am a wildlife biologist and an intern in criminalistics. I am a movie buff, a wife, and a woman trying to become a mother. I am a friend. Without this recovery program, all of those parts of me were fading away, consumed by my obsession; but with this program, I am BACK.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will celebrate the fact that I am on the journey to becoming a whole person again.
~ Claire ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Most emphatically we wish to say that any alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to all spiritual concepts. He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial. - Pg. 568 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Our ideal right now must be to remain clean and sober. Other ideals can be built upon later, but right now the act of cleansing our bodies, minds, and spirits must prevail.
I clean my body by staying off all mind-affecting chemicals. I clean my mind by going to meetings. I clean my spirit by working steps.
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Sponsors are lighthouses, not foghorns. We look to them to see how they do it, not depend on them to tell us what not to do. We already know.
I cannot improve if I only have myself as a model.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you're thinking about going to a meeting, go to the meeting, and then think about it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Fears sometimes still lingers in my mind. I can be okay when that happens. I can feel them through and talk about them and go on in spite of them, not letting myself picture the worst, but seeing the results in a positive light.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My hands shook so bad I could thread a sewing machine - when it was running. - Eddie C.
bluidkiti
07-18-2015, 09:57 AM
July 19
Daily Reflections
FALSE PRIDE, p.209
Many of us who had thought ourselves religious awoke to the
limitations of this attitude. Refusing to place God first, we had
deprived ourselves of His help.
12 & 12, p. 75
Many false notions operate in false pride. The need for direction to
live a decent life is satisfied by the hope experienced in the A.A.
Fellowship. Those who have walked the way for years--a day at a
time--say that a God centered life has limitless possibilities for
personal growth. This being so, much hope is transmitted by the elder A.A.s.
I thank my Higher Power for letting me know that He works through
other people, and I thank Him for our trusted servants in the
Fellowship who aid new members to reject their false ideals and to
adopt those which lead to a life of compassion and trust. The elders
in A.A. challenge the newcomers to "Come To"--so that they can
"Come to Believe." I ask my Higher Power to help my unbelief.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Gossip about or criticism of personalities has no place in an A.A.
clubroom. Every man in A.A. is a brother and every woman is a sister,
as long as he or she is a member of A.A. We ought not to gossip
about the relationships of any man or woman in the group. And if we
say about another member, "I think she or he is taking a few drinks
on the side," it's the worst thing we could do to that person. If a
woman or a man is not living up to A.A. principles or has a slip, it's
up to her or him to stand up in a meeting and say so. If they don't do
that, they are only hurting themselves. Do I talk about other members
behind their backs?
Meditation for the Day
To God, a miracle of change in a person's life is only a natural
happening. But it is a natural happening operated by spiritual forces.
There is no miracle in personalities too marvelous to be an everyday
happening. But miracles happen only to those who are fully guided
and strengthened by God. Marvelous changes in people's nature
happen so simply, and yet they are free from all other agencies than
the grace of God. But these miracles have been prepared for by days
and months of longing for something better. They are always
accompanied by a real desire to conquer self and to surrender one's
life to God.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may expect miracles in the lives of people. I pray that I
may be used to help people change.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Source of Strength, p. 200
When World War II broke out, our A.A. dependence on a Higher
Power had its first major test. A.A.'s entered the services and were
scattered all over the world.
Would they be able to take discipline, stand up under fire, and endure
the monotony and misery of war? Would the kind of dependence they
had learned in A.A. carry them through?
Well, it did. They had even fewer alcoholic lapses or emotional binges
than A.A.'s safe at home did. They were just as capable of endurance
and valor as any other soldiers. Whether in Alaska or on the Salerno
beachhead, their dependence upon a Higher Power worked.
Far from being a weakness, this dependence was their chief source of strength.
12 & 12, pp. 38-39
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Walk In Dry Places
Hurrying up to wait?
Practicing Serenity.
We often urge ourselves to hurry up when there's no good reason for it. At such times, all we really do is create needless tension and anxiety.
The slogan "EASY DOES IT" is our answer to such calls to hurry. The slogan suggests that we simply move into the rhythms of life and "go with the flow."
It's not hurrying but steady effort that finally brings achievement. We've had entirely too much hurry and impatience. What we really need is confident, persistent effort in the right direction. We should be especially reminded of hits when we see anxious, impatient people speeding through traffic only to be forced to wait at traffic lights, risking life and limb to save a few seconds. A good seady pace is what we need, and it will win the game.
I"ll be active today, but not overactive. I'll look for rhythm and efficiency in everything I do.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
We grow small trying to be great.
We dreamed of being great. Trying to be great is about control. We've caused a lot of trouble trying to control things. We've been afraid to just let things happen, We're not very trusting. Many of us have good reasons not to trust. Whatever the reasons, we had put our trust in getting drunk or high. We thought that was one thing we could control. What really happened? We got sick.
Recovery is based on trust. We must learn to trust that it's best for us to give up control. It will seem strange at first. But letting go and trusting can become a way of life. The Steps, our groups, our sponsor, and our Higher Power---here, we find love and caring. We can trust them.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that day by day, I'll put more trust in my program and in my Higher Power.
Action for the Day: I'll list five reasons why I can trust my Twelve Step program.
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Each Day a New Beginning
At fifteen life had taught me undeniably that surrender, in its place, was as honorable as resistance, especially if one had no choice. --Maya Angelou
We had to surrender to a power greater than ourselves to get to where we are today. And each day, we have to turn to that power for strength and guidance. For us, resistance means struggle--struggle with others as well as an internal struggle.
Serenity isn't compatible with struggle. We cannot control forces outside of ourselves. We cannot control the actions of our family or our co-workers. We can control our responses to them. And when we choose to surrender our attempts to control, we will find peace and serenity.
That which we abhor, that which we fear, that which we wish to conquer seems suddenly to be gone when we decide to resist no more - to tackle it no more.
The realities of life come to us in mysterious ways. We fight so hard, only to learn that what we need will never be ours until the struggle is forsaken. Surrender brings enlightenment.
Life's lessons are simple once I give up the struggle.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
See your man alone, if possible. At first engage in general conversation. After a while, turn the talk to some phase of drinking. Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. You will thus get a better idea of how you ought to proceed. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch or your drinking career up to the time you quit. But say nothing, for the moment, of how that was accomplished. If he is in a serious mood dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades. Get him to tell some of his.
p. 91
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
The Third Step said: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." Now they ask us to make a decision! We've got to turn the whole business over to some joker we can't even see! And this chokes the alcoholic. Here he is powerless, unmanageable, in the grip of something bigger than he is, and he's got to turn the whole business over to someone else! It fills the alcoholic with rage. We are great people. We can handle anything. And so one gets ot thinking to oneself. Who is this God? Who is this fellow we are supposed to turn everything over to? What can He do for us that we can't do for ourselves? Well, I don't know who He is, but I've got my own idea.
p. 306
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This vital Step was also the means by which we began to get the feeling that we could be forgiven, no matter what we had thought or done. Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors or spiritual advisers that we first felt truly able to forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had wronged us. Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all-round forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.
pp. 57-58
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All things are difficult before they are easy.
--Italian Proverb
"If you are afraid of your future, you don't have a present."
--James Petersen
How joyful to look upon the Awakened and to keep company with the wise. Follow then the shining ones, the wise, the awakened, the loving, for
they know how to work and forbear. But if you cannot find friend or master to go with you, travel on alone ~ like a king who has given away his kingdom, like an elephant in the forest.
--Buddha, from the Dhammapada (Sayings of the Buddha)
When you get in a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
--Harriet Beecher Stowe
It is never too late to start doing what is right!
--Growing Deep In The Christian Life, p.380
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
YOUTH
"We are none of us infallible --
not even the youngest of us."
--W. H. Thompson
When I was a young man I did not want to listen to older people because I felt that they did not understand me. With hindsight I see that I did not want to hear what they were saying about my lifestyle.
Today now that I am a "mature man" with a few years of sobriety, I must avoid having the same attitude towards the young, not listening to them because I think they are "too young" or do not understand! I must not repeat, in reverse, yesterday's mistakes!
None of us are infallible. We are not God. We can learn from each other if we have the patience to listen. Sometimes we need to seek the meaning behind the words.
God, teach me to listen with the ear of understanding and patience.
************************************************** *********
"For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus."
Galatians 3:26
"Sunshine is sweet; it is good to see the light of day. People ought to enjoy every day of their lives, no matter how long they live…"
Ecclesiastes 11:7-8
Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.
Joel 2:32
Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.
John 6:35
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Daily Inspiration
Never look back with regret because life is never perfect, but it offers us the perfect moment to start anew which is right now. Lord, help me to live with enthusiasm and recognize that each new day is an adventure.
Live as a responsible adult, but approach God as a child, full of faith and trust. You cannot help but perfect one by the other. Lord, You are my Father. Who else will so lovingly listen to me and care for my desires?
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Fulfilling Our Dreams
"Dreams that we gave up long ago can now become realities."
Basic Text, p. 68
All things begin with a dream. But how many of us fulfilled our dreams while using? Even if we managed to complete something we had started, our addiction usually robbed us of any pride in our accomplishment. Perhaps when we used, we dreamed of the day when we would be clean. That day has come. We can use this day to make our dreams come true. To fulfill our dreams we must take action, but our lack of self confidence may keep us from trying. We can begin by setting realistic goals.
The success we experience when we attain our initial goals allows us to dream bigger dreams the next time around.Some of our members share that when they compare the ambitions they had when they first got clean with what they have actually achieved in recovery, they are astounded. In recovery, we often find more dreams come true than we could ever have imagined.
Just for today: I will remember that all things begin with a dream. Today, I will allow myself to make my dreams come true.
pg. 209
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Trust takes time. If you don't invest it, then you don't get it. --Anonymous
Trusting other human beings is like planting a garden. First we must choose where to plant--is the soil healthy, is it open to sunlight? We would not plant seeds on rocks that are hard and un-giving. In the same way, we need to choose friends who are trustworthy, who are like rich soil open to planting and sunlight.
Then we need to plant the seeds of time and care. If we share some of our feelings and are welcomed, we will know it is safe to share more. We can share ourselves in our own time--even a garden grows slowly, and can take only so much sun and rain in one day.
Having trust in someone feeds the spirit. Trust also gives us the courage to be beautiful, like the flowers of our gardens.
Am I brave enough to trust others, and to be worthy of their trust?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
They have rights who dare defend them. --Roger Baldwin
There is a hard side to emotional health and manhood. As we grow, we gain many more sides, more ways of responding to the situations we meet. We learn that yielding to God sometimes means letting our full strength flow to defend our rights and ward off intrusion or disrespect. As we have become more loving and tolerant, we have become more assertive for our rights and those of others.
We must speak up for ourselves and for our points of view. We must not let others demean us or put us down, nor can we take on blame for others' life problems. When we ought to stand up for ourselves and don't, we may be invaded by a false feeling that we are crazy or bad. As recovering men, we sometimes must call on our hard side and say, "No! I will not be a doormat for the harmful actions of others. I will defend my rights."
I will cultivate my relationship with my Higher Power and let that lead me to stand up for myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
At fifteen life had taught me undeniably that surrender, in its place, was as honorable as resistance, especially if one had no choice. --Maya Angelou
We had to surrender to a power greater than ourselves to get to where we are today. And each day, we have to turn to that power for strength and guidance. For us, resistance means struggle--struggle with others as well as an internal struggle.
Serenity isn't compatible with struggle. We cannot control forces outside of ourselves. We cannot control the actions of our family or our co-workers. We can control our responses to them. And when we choose to surrender our attempts to control, we will find peace and serenity.
That which we abhor, that which we fear, that which we wish to conquer seems suddenly to be gone when we decide to resist no more - to tackle it no more.
The realities of life come to us in mysterious ways. We fight so hard, only to learn that what we need will never be ours until the struggle is forsaken. Surrender brings enlightenment.
Life's lessons are simple once I give up the struggle.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Proving It to Ourselves
I spent a year trying to prove to my husband how much his drinking was hurting me. When I began to recover, I realized I was the one who needed to realize how much his drinking was hurting me. --Anonymous
I spent months trying to prove to a man I was dating how responsible and healthy I was. Then I realized what I was doing. He didn't need to realize how responsible and healthy I was. I did. --Anonymous
Trying to prove how good we are, trying to prove we're good enough, trying to show someone how much he or she has hurt us, trying to show someone we're understanding, are warning signs that we may be into our self defeating behaviors.
They can be an indication that we are trying to control someone. They can be an indication that we do not believe how good we are, that we're good enough, that someone is hurting us.
They can be a warning that we've allowed ourselves to get hooked into a dysfunctional system. They may indicate that we're stuck in the cloudy fog of denial or doing something that is not good for us.
Trying excessively to make a point with another may mean that we have not yet made that point with ourselves. Once we make that point with ourselves, once we understand, we will know what to do.
The issue is not about others understanding and taking us seriously. The issue is not about others believing we're good and good enough. The issue is not about others seeing and believing how responsible or loving or competent we are. The issue is not about whether others realize how deeply we are feeling a particular feeling. We are the ones that need to see the light.
Today, God, help me let go of my need to control outcomes by influencing the beliefs of others. I will concentrate on accepting myself, rather than trying to prove something about myself. If I catch myself in the codependent trap of trying to emphasize something about myself to another, I will ask myself if I need to convince myself at that point.
Today I have faith that I am being led to the answers I need to learn. If I keep putting one foot in front of the other, I will always be in a safe place. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
The Lessons Are Love
Lessons of love, that’s what they are.
We usually don’t know what the lesson is while we’re learning it. Maybe we’re not supposed to. Besides, if we knew it, really knew it, we wouldn’t need to learn it. We’d already be practicing it in our daily lives. But even when we don’t know what the lesson is, we can know one thing, it’s a lesson of love.
Courage. Faith. Patience. Loving ourselves when it looks and feels like nobody else cares. Starting over again one more time, when we think we’ve already started over again more times than we should have had to. Forgiveness. Compassion. Gentleness. Joy. Each one is a lesson of love.
For many of us, the problem isn’t that we haven’t had love in our lives before. The issue is that we haven’t understood love. Know this: not only are the lessons about love, the lessons themselves are love.
Feel your feelings. Struggle through your situations and experiences and emotions. The struggle to learn isn’t incidental to your purpose. It’s an integral part of your purpose, your destiny, your reason for being. Go through your moments of darkness and confusion,and trust that light will come. Through it all, rest in one thought: you’re on track. You’re on your path.
You’re connected to love. You’re connected to God. And the lessons you’re learning are lessons of love.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Watch your “never’s”
Be careful what you say you’ll never do again. You might be building a wall between you and the good in your life.
He hurt me, so I’m never going to speak to him again. She hurt me, so I’m never going to get involved with women again.
Sometimes, our hurt feelings can be accurate and reliable warnings that we need to back off and stay away. But usually when we say never, it’s because we don’t want to be vulnerable and feel the hurt that came our way.
Saying never may be an indication that we’ve closed our hearts.
Have you built a wall with your “never’s”? Look. Peek underneath. Is there a feeling of hurt you need to feel, instead?
You got burned when you touched the hot stove, so you’re never going to go near a stove again? You’ll miss out on some tasty meals.
God, help me be vulnerable enough to feel my pein and learn my lesson, instead of saying never and building a big wall.
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In God’s Care
We are what we are.
~~Motto of Lake Wobegon, Garrison Keillor
Sometimes we devote so much effort to being what we are not, that we lose the chance to be what we are. We have one identity for this person and another for that one. Our co-workers, neighbors, friends, family – all expect different things of us, leaving us wondering who we actually are. How can we be so many different things to so many people?
God wants us to be only who we are, We were created with unique characteristics for a purpose, even if that purpose isn’t always clear to us. We need to be who we really are, and to be the best we can be, knowing that God approves because God created us as we are.
I will be the best me that I know how to be.
************************************************** **************
Day By Day
Taking just one
It’s that first fix, pill, or drink that gets us high. It’s not the second or third or fourth one, or the second day or the second week of using that gets us into trouble. It is the first one. And until we understand this concept, we will keep trying-without success-to gain control over our drug use.
For us, control no longer exists. And it never will. When we start thinking, Well, just one won’t hurt me, we are on our way back to that same pain and discouragement of a drug-filled life.
Do I believe that even one is too many?
Higher Power, please help me remember that I can never regain control over my drug use.
I will avoid taking that first drink or drug today by…
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Food for Thought
Right Makes Might
When we are working our program properly, we have an inner sense of rightness that makes us strong and self-confident. We are controlling food, rather than being controlled by it. We are willing to let our Higher Power straighten out our confused lives.
Action is necessary. We need to “walk the walk” as well as “talk the talk.” No amount of insight will give us progress unless we are willing to take the concrete steps outlined in the OA program. We need to work closely with qualified sponsors who can guide us in our abstinence and in our program.
Compulsive overeating made us weak physically, emotionally, and spiritually. As we abstain, we gain strength on all three levels.
Thank You for the strength that comes from doing the right thing.
************************************************** **************
Go for It
Making It Happen by Madisyn Taylor
The universe is fully supportive of what you want, but it is up to you to go for it.
There are times in our lives when all the signs seem to be pointing us in a particular direction. Our thoughts and dreams are echoed in the songs and stories we hear and the media we see. Maybe the message we are getting from the universe doesn’t even make sense in the “real” world, but somewhere inside, these urges feel right. Maybe you feel you are being told to move to a new city although your life where you are is just fine. Or maybe you feel the desire to pursue a new direction in your career when it never really interested you before. When we spend time getting in touch with our higher selves, our intuition sends us directives to lead us to become our best and most fulfilled selves. And when we are open and listening, the next step is to take action and go for it.
Once we make the decision to pursue our inner urgings, the universe sets into motion the means for all sorts of details to fall into place. A sense of peace will come over us, because we know that any questions will no longer make us wonder if our dreams are possible, but how to make them happen. Instead of deterring us from our goal, these questions only serve to clarify our focus to move us forward. We need not throw caution to the wind to follow our dream. The positive shift in our energy affects everything around us. Like a rush of water, it goes ahead to clear debris from our path so that we can go forward. Our new attitude also attracts likeminded people. Sometimes even the most unlikely angels arrive to help us along our way with the information and support we need.
Wherever your dreams are pointing you today, take a step. Take action and manifest your inner urges and soul whisperings. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Many of us come to The Program professing that we’re agnostic or atheistic. As someone once put it, our will to disbelieve is so strong that we prefer a date with the undertaker to an experimental and open-minded search for a Higher Power. Fortunately for those of us with closed minds, the constructive forces in The Program almost always overcome our obstinacy. Before long, we discover the bountiful world of faith and trust. It was there all along, but we lacked the willingness and open-mindedness to accept it. Does obstinacy still sometimes blind me to the power for good that resides in faith?
Today I Pray
I want to thank God for this opportunity to open my mind; to learn again about faith and trust; to realize that my wanderings did not change His place within me or His loving concern for me. May I know that it was my own doing that I lost faith. Thank God for another chance to believe.
Today I Will Remember
Discard the will to disbelieve.
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One More Day
Our faith comes in moments; our vice is habitual.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Some habits are not good for us, yet we can fall into them so easily. “Just one more drink,” we rationalize, “It won’t hurt me. I don’t have to go to work tomorrow,” “Just a small piece of cake, I’ll start my diet tomorrow,” We may not realize that we are acting in a pattern. Being human, we continue in this way until something happens which forces us to change our patterns and ourselves.
Whatever that something is, it may prompt many actions, one of which may be to turn to our faith for solace. many things in our lives are uncertain. There is uncertainty as to how our day will be. It is our faith that keeps us going regardless of any setbacks. The moments of darkness we all fall into can be overcome by faith.
I can believe and trust in my Higher Power no matter what is happening in my life now.
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One Day At A Time
HONORING MYSELF
“And how shall you punish those whose remorse
is already greater than their misdeeds?”
Kahlil Gibran
We are not bad people trying to become good; rather, we are sick people trying to get well. It takes a long time for some of us to believe this truth. We have been programmed to believe the worst about ourselves … or ironically, to believe ourselves to be much better than others. This appears to be a common denominator in our disease.
We despise the person we perceive ourselves to be. Virtually every event in our lives drives us deeper into the abyss of remorse, self-abuse, self-hate, and self-serving. We must stop believing lies about ourselves. The fact that we are here on Earth is proof that we belong and that we have the right -- even the obligation -- to be what we can be.
One day at a time...
I will honor and respect myself.
~ Jeremiah
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
There is scarcely any form of trouble and misery which has not been overcome among us. - Pg. 15 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
All of us go through phases of loving meetings, hating meetings, or ambivalence. The ups and downs and erratic emotions are a normal part of recovery. To stay in recovery we make 90 meetings in 90 days regardless of our many phases.
May I make 90 in 90, regardless of my erratic beginning emotions. I know my thinking is still not as clear as it will be.
Meditation
Today, I recognize the source of light and wisdom that is within me. When I look outside myself to learn about what is actually inside, I need to exercise great discernment because some of what I see fits and some does not. There is a fountain within me that is ever full and waiting to be discovered. When I can rest quietly in this inner place, I experience a sense of fullness, and my desire to go outside diminishes and gives way to a preference for undisturbed peace. Solitude takes on a different meaning when I can contact that quiet within. Life softens and external things become less important. I look for this place within me on a daily basis. I give myself this present today.
I search within.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Our program won't keep you from going to hell nor is it a ticket to heaven. But it will keep you clean and sober long enough for you to make up your mind which way you want to go.
My journey is my destination.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
For 'suggestion' you have two choices: Take it or leave it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I have faith that I am being led to the answers I need to learn. If I keep putting one foot in front of the other, I will always be in a safe place.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I have an amnesty prayer, I've seen it work hundreds of times. It's very simple. You can put it in your own words; 'I forgive everyone on the face of this earth, living or dead, who has ever done anything to me - real or imagined - and I want good things to happen to them.' If you will continue to say that , I will guarantee you that your attitude toward the people who are troubling you in your life is going to change. - Frank H.
bluidkiti
07-18-2015, 10:00 AM
July 20
Daily Reflections
SHORTCOMINGS REMOVED
But now the words "Of myself I am nothing, the Father doeth the
works" began to carry bright promise and meaning.
12 & 12, p. 75
When I put the Seventh Step into action I must remember that
there are no blanks to fill in. It doesn't say, "Humbly asked Him to
(fill in the blank) remove our shortcomings." For years I filled in
the imaginary blank with "Help me!" "Give me the courage to,"
and "Give me the strength," etc. The Step says simply that God
will remove my shortcomings. The only footwork I must do is "humbly
ask," which for me means asking with the knowledge that of myself I
am nothing, the Father within "doeth the works."
I thank my Higher Power for letting me know that He works through
other people, and I thank Him for our trusted servants in the
Fellowship who aid new members to reject their false ideals and
to adopt those which lead to a life of compassion and trust. The
elders in A.A. challenge the newcomers to "Come To"--so that
they can "Come to Believe." I ask my Higher Power to help my
unbelief.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We must be loyal to the group and to each member of it. We must
never accuse members behind their backs or even to their faces.
It's up to them to tell us themselves if anything is wrong. More than
that, we must try not to think bad things about any members, because
if we do, we're consciously or unconsciously hurting that person. We
must be loyal to each other if A.A. is going to be successful. While
we're on this lifeboat, trying to save ourselves and each other from
alcoholism, we must be truly and sincerely helpful to each other. Am I
a loyal member of my group?
Meditation For The Day
Carry out God's guidance as best you can. Leave the results to Him.
Do this obediently and faithfully with no question that if the working
out of the guidance is left in God's hands, the results will be all
right. Believe that the guidance God gives you has already been
worked out by God to produce the required results according to your
case and in your circumstances. So follow God's guidance according
to your conscience. God has knowledge of your individual life and
character, your capabilities and your weaknesses.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may live according to the dictates of my conscience. I
pray that I may leave the results to God.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Unlimited Choice, p. 201
Any number of alcoholics are bedeviled by the dire conviction that if
they ever go near A.A. they will be pressured to conform to some
particular brand of faith or theology.
They just don't realize that faith is never an imperative for A.A.
membership. that sobriety can be achieved with an easily acceptable
minimum of it, and that our concepts of a Higher Power and God--as
we understand Him--afford everyone a nearly unlimited choice of
spiritual belief and action.
********************************
In talking to a prospect, stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man
be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to
agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he
likes, provided it makes sense to him.
The main thing is that he is willing to believe in a Power greater than
himself and that he live by spiritual principles.
1. Grapevine, April 1961
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 93
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Spiritual guidance.
If we go through the day with a confidence that our Higher Power is with us, events will go better than they would if we hadn't held to this belief. We will be more effective in everything we do. We will actually have more power in all activities.
This is what is meant in the Eleventh Step; "the power to carry that out." Knowing that the Higher power is in our lives, we also find the power to do what we believe to be God's will for us. As this confidence strengthens and is seasoned by experience, it becomes part of our nature.
Eventually, we'll sense our Higher Power working in our lives. We can learn to accept this with the same sure belief that we accept the sun's rising and the changing of the seasons. And we'll have the power to do whatever must be done by us.
A conscious contact with God can raise my daily activities to higher levels, giving me the power of achievement.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Living so fully. I can't image what any drug would do for me.---Joan Baez
When we were using alcohol and other drugs, our lives kept getting emptier. We tired to keep new things out of our lives. We were scared and tired. We saw feelings as bad. So we got high instead of feeling them.
Now we can live fully every day. We don't want to block our feelings. We aren't afraid to opening up to new things and people.
And the more we open up, the happier we are. Our feelings are free. They bounce around. They don't get stuck. We feel alive. Sure, we feel pain and fear sometimes. But we feel joy, love, and laughter too. And, more and more often, we feel alive.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please help me live fully today. Help me notice my feelings.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list five things I've enjoyed in the last twenty-four hours.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
It is ironic that the one thing that all religions recognize as separating us from our Creator--our very self-consciousness--is also the one thing that divides us from our fellow creatures. --Annie Dillard
Getting outside of ourselves, moving beyond our own egos, opens the door to real communication with the people we'll meet today. We have to learn to look with loving appreciation into the soul of that person or child who stands before us. We have to practice being concerned with their needs before our own, and in time our concern will be genuine. The separation between us will exist no more.
This division from others, the barrier that keeps us apart, comes from our individual insecurities. We have grown accustomed to the quick comparisons of ourselves with those we meet. Either inferior or superior we determine them to be, and thus ourselves. Whatever gifts we have to offer each other are left unwrapped, at least for now.
Let's come together, truly together, with someone we've been holding off until now. We can trust that the people who have come into our lives are there by design. We are equal to them, and they to us. We need what they have to offer us, and their growth needs our gifts, too.
I will appreciate the design of my life today. I will draw myself close to the day.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
When he sees you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic. Tell him how baffled you were, how you finally learned that you were sick. Give him an account of the struggles you made to stop. Show him the mental twist which leads to the first drink of a spree. We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism. If he is alcoholic, he will understand you at once. He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own.
pp. 91-92
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
For myself, I have an absolute proof of the existence of God. I was sitting in my office one time after I had operated on a woman. It had been a long four- or five-hour operation, a large surgical procedure, and she was on her ninth or then post-operative day. She was doing fine, she was up and around, and that day her husband phoned me and said, "Doctor, thanks very much for curing my wife," and I thanked him for his felicitations, and he hung up. And then I scratched my head and said to myself, What a fantastic thing for a man to say, that I had cured his wife. Here I am down at my office behind my desk, and there she is out at the hospital. I am not even there, and if I was there the only thing I could do would be to give her moral support, and yet he thanks me for curing his wife. I thought to myself----What is curing that woman? Yes, I put in those stitches. The Great Boss has given me diagnostic and surgical talent, and He has loaned it to me to use for the rest of my life. It doesn't belong to me. He has loaned it to me and I did my job, but the ended nine days ago. What healed those tissues that I closed? I didn't. This to me is the proof of the existence of a Somethingness greater than I am. I couldn't practice medicine without the Great Physician. All I do in a very simple way is to help Him cure my patients.
pp. 306-307
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Another great dividend we may expect from confiding our defects to another human being is humility--a word often misunderstood. To those who have made progress in A.A., it amounts to a clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be. Therefore, our first practical move toward humility must consist of recognizing our deficiencies. No defect can be corrected unless we clearly see what it is. But we shall have to do more than see. The objective look at ourselves we achieved in Step Four was, after all, only a look. All of us saw, for example, that we lacked honesty and tolerance, that we were beset at times by attacks of self-pity or delusions of personal grandeur. But while this was a humiliating experience, it didn't necessarily mean that we had yet acquired much actual humility. Though now recognized, our defects were still there. Something had to be done about them. And we soon found that we could not wish or will them away by ourselves.
p. 58
************************************************** *********
Truth gives a short answer; lies go round about.
--German Proverb
People who soar are those who refuse to sit back, sigh and wish
things would change. They neither complain of their lot nor
passively dream of some distant ship coming in. Rather, they visualize in
their minds that they are not quitters; they will not allow life's
circumstances to push them down and hold them under.
--Charles Swindoll
An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
--Mahatma Gandhi
He that cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he
himself must pass if he would ever reach heaven; for everyone has
need to be forgiven.
--George Herbert
One doesn't recognize in one's life the really important moments....
not until it's too late.
--Agatha Christie
We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap
as they go by.
--Will Rogers
Man is a creature whose substance is faith. What his faith is, he is.
--Bhagavad Gita
"Learn to see in another's calamity the ills which you should avoid."
--Publius Syrus
............ that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something
you've understood all your life, but in a new way.
--Doris Lessing
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
WORRY
"When I look back on all these
worries, I remember the story of
the old man who said on his
deathbed that he had had a lot
of trouble in his life, most of
which never happened."
--Winston Churchill
I know I can worry myself into the grave. I can project an incident
into a calamity. I can make mountains out of molehills.
I worried about what people meant by what they said; I always
looked for a hidden criticism; I worried about what people did not
say; I worried about what people were thinking or were going to do or
were plotting. If I had nothing to worry about, then I worried because
I felt I should have something to worry about! I created most of the
worry in my life.
Today I have a program that helps me deal with this. Of course I still
worry, but I have a "checklist" that keeps me sane and allows me to
laugh at the insanity of my projections. Today the worry in my life is
less destructive and negative.
Let me bring my worry to You in prayer. Then let me sleep!
************************************************** *********
"Therefore know this day, and consider it in your heart, that the Lord Himself is God in Heaven above and on the earth beneath; there is no other." Deuteronomy 4:39
I cling to you, and your hand keeps me safe. Psalm 63:8
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Daily Inspiration
Place yourself in God's hands first thing in the morning so that your entire day will be in His care. Lord, may my prayer and my attitude be one so that my relationship with You never becomes casual.
As we help those in need or comfort those in trouble, God's great love and divine glory is revealed to the world. Lord, I am Your servant. May others know more of You through me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Step 0ne
"We admitted that we were powerless over our addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable."
Step One
The First Step begins with "we," and there's a reason for that. There is great strength in making a verbal admission of our powerlessness. And when we go to meetings and make this admission, we gain more than personal strength. We become members, part of a collective "we" that allows us, together, to recover from our addiction. With membership in NA comes a wealth of experience: the experience of other addicts who have found a way to recover from their disease.
No longer must we try to solve the puzzle of our addiction on our own. When we honestly admit our powerlessness over our addiction, we can begin the search for a better way to live. We won't be searching alone - we're in good company.
Just for today: I will start the day with an admission of my powerlessness over addiction. I will remind myself that the First Step starts with "we," and know that I never have to be alone with my disease again.
pg. 210
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
It is terribly amusing how many different climates of feeling one can go through in a day. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When we travel by canoe down a river we can notice the changes that take place. In one spot the river is wide and the water moves slowly. Around the next bend the river narrows and the current speeds up. Ahead of us we see rapids waiting to test our skill.
Our feelings can also change as quickly as the river. We may have times in our day when we feel good about ourselves. Then, all of a sudden, someone may tease us about something. We begin to feel like the scared canoeist shooting the rapids for the first time. How wonderful it is to know that we are never given a test we can't handle, that everything that happens in our lives is for the sake of our growth, and that we are watched over at all times by God.
How can I use today's obstacles for my own growth?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Without solitude there can be no real people.... The measure of your solitude is the measure of your capacity/or communion.
--John Eudes
If we listen in those moments when we hear a message from ourselves, we become true men - real human beings. The message comes in our solitude, when our defenses against truth are set aside. It comes popping out without our planning it. Our solitude is a relationship with ourselves, and it might occur in silent meditation, or driving down the street, or during a dinner conversation. The message might be a painful truth like, "You just acted like a small child," or a frightening fact like, "You are deeply loved by another person."
Letting another person know what messages we are getting in solitude helps us deal with the messages. As we accept our imperfections and make peace with ourselves, we increase our sense of solitude. We become real men, full partners in relationships and in our communities.
Today, I will welcome solitude. When the messages from myself are painful or frightening, I will be gentle with myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It is ironic that the one thing that all religions recognize as separating us from our Creator--our very self-consciousness--is also the one thing that divides us from our fellow creatures. --Annie Dillard
Getting outside of ourselves, moving beyond our own egos, opens the door to real communication with the people we'll meet today. We have to learn to look with loving appreciation into the soul of that person or child who stands before us. We have to practice being concerned with their needs before our own, and in time our concern will be genuine. The separation between us will exist no more.
This division from others, the barrier that keeps us apart, comes from our individual insecurities. We have grown accustomed to the quick comparisons of ourselves with those we meet. Either inferior or superior we determine them to be, and thus ourselves. Whatever gifts we have to offer each other are left unwrapped, at least for now.
Let's come together, truly together, with someone we've been holding off until now. We can trust that the people who have come into our lives are there by design. We are equal to them, and they to us. We need what they have to offer us, and their growth needs our gifts, too.
I will appreciate the design of my life today. I will draw myself close to the day.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Resistance
Do not be in such a hurry to move on.
Relax. Breathe deeply. Be. Be in harmony today.
Be open. There is beauty around and in us today. There is purpose and meaning in today.
There is importance in today - not so much in what happens to us, but in how we respond.
Let today happen. We learn our lessons, we work things out, we change in a simple fashion: by living our life fully today.
Do not worry about tomorrow's feelings, problems, or gifts. Do not worry about whether we can trust life, our Higher Power, or ourselves tomorrow.
Everything we need today shall be given to us. That is a promise - from God, from the Universe.
Feel today's feelings. Solve today's problems. Enjoy today's gifts. Trust yourself, life, and your Higher Power today.
Acquire the art of living fully today. Absorb the lessons, the healing, the beauty, the love available to us today.
Do not be in such a rush to move on. There is no hurry. We cannot escape; ;we only postpone. Let the feelings go; breathe in peace and healing.
Do not be in such a hurry to move on.
Today, I will not run from my circumstances, my feelings, or myself. I will be open to others, Higher Power, my life, and myself. I will trust that by facing today to the best of my ability, I will acquire the skills I need to face tomorrow.
Today I am reaching out to those who love and support me. I am letting go of my ego and self-centeredness so that I can make space to take in love and support and ideas from others. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Value Your Connection to Creativity
For years, I had been storing my son’s clothing, some of his favorite articles, in boxes in the garage. I didn’t want to let go of the clothes, yet I had no use for them. One day an idea came. I was talking to a woman enthralled with quilting, with fabrics, textures, and the art of creating quilts. She was talking about how she was making a quilt out of her family’s old blue jeans, because it created a use for the fabric and gave them a blanket that held the energy and memory of their experiences. It wasn’t just a quilt. It became a special comfort quilt because of the energy the fabrics held.
That’s when the idea came. My son had died years ago. His physical presence was no longer here. But the clothes held the memories of his physical presence and the energy of his spiritual presence. I could make them into a quilt, one that would cherish his memory and give me comfort.
How do we get our ideas? From other people. From certain triggers in the world, the universe. From our imagination. We are connected to creativity. It’s a force in the universe, an energy that runs through us. If we’re connected to ourselves, our intuition will guide us to what to do and when to do it. If we love ourselves enough to act confidently and joyfully on that guidance.
Value your connection with creativity. Embrace your imagination. The universe will show you how, teach you how, help you along the way.
**************************************************
More Language Of Letting Go
Take down those walls
Frank was a happily married man, or so he thought. Then one day, his wife of ten years came home and told him that she didn’t feel like being married anymore. “I love you. I’m just not in love with you,” she said, walking out the door.
Frank was devastated. He got mad at his wife, mad at his church, and mad at God. He got mad, and he stayed that way. He fumed and generalized. He decided that all women must be this way and sooner or later anyone who got too close would hurt him.
Many of us experience hurt in life. It comes with the game.
It’s okay to hurt, to be angry, even to be bitter for a while. But no one is interested in hearing our lost love story ten years after it happened.
We even get sick of hearing it, ourselves.
Sometimes it’s time to nurture our pain. Sometimes it’s time to get over it and get back in the game.
We all fall. Most people change their minds. We all make mistakes.
We don’t have to let a bad experience in life prevent us from having positive experiences in the future. Walls are indiscriminate. While they may protect us from being hurt again, they’ll also prevent us from experiencing joy.
God, help me let go of self-sabotaging attitudes formed in a moment of hurt. Open me to the beauty that awaits when I approach life with an open heart.
**************************************************
In God’s Care
The answer to personality problems is found in a quiet return to Godlike thinking.
~~Science of Mind, magazine
When we’re edgy and critical or perhaps feeling inadequate or depressed, we’ve lost our atonement with God. And when acting the way God would have us act is no longer our priority, our character defects once again emerge and, in time, grow ever more numerous.
We can make the simple decision to always check out our proposed behavior against the behavior we know is from God. When we remember to think of God first before proceeding, we avoid unnecessary conflicts; we refrain from consciously hurting anyone; we manage to take our experiences restfully, moment by moment.
There’s really no mystery to having a rewarding and peaceful life. Those we notice who do, have likely made a more frequent companion of God than we. The decision to work more on our own friendship with God is an easy one to make.
I will act according to God’s wishes today and in the process, strengthen our friendship.
************************************************** ***********
Day By Day
Making a decision
We made a decision, a decision to try this program because all else had failed. (We still doubted it would work, but we were desperate.) This decision was made mostly on hope and a belief. At first, it did not reflect belief in a Higher Power but belief in other people.
When we make a decision to do whatever is necessary, our belief can grow. It can grow to a point where no power on earth can shake our foundation. And from this foundation we can, in turn, offer hope to others in need. We can plant in them the same seeds of belief that made it possible for us to be clean and sober.
Is my belief growing?
Higher Power, help me stay strong in the program and help others who need to establish roots.
Today I will renew my commitment to the program and its members by
************************************************** **************
Food for Thought
Turning Toward the Light
Plants, as they grow, automatically turn toward the light. People can choose between light or darkness. The OA program is available to us, but we may choose whether or not we will follow it. Our Higher Power is also available to us, if we choose to seek His will.
Before we found OA, we wandered around in the darkness of compulsive overeating. Now that we see glimmers of light, we need to turn ourselves in the direction from which the light is coming. Working the program requires taking the time and effort to change our routine. The light is here, but we need to turn away from darkness and open ourselves to it.
As we examine ourselves in the light that comes from our Higher Power through OA, we begin to see more clearly where we should make changes and how we may find health and peace.
Grant us grace to turn toward Your light.
************************************************** **************
Changing Roles
As We Ebb and Flow through Life by Madisyn Taylor
We all change throughout life trying new and different things, but the core of who we really are remains the same.
As we bob and weave with the ebb and flow of life our roles change, but our true self remains constant. As spiritual beings having a human experience, we go through many aspects of humanity in one lifetime. Living in the material world of opposites, labels, and classifications, we often identify ourselves by the roles we play, forgetting that these aspects shift and change throughout our lives. But when we anchor ourselves in the truth of our being, that core of spirit within us, we can choose to embrace the new roles as they come, knowing that they give us fresh perspective on life and a greater understanding of the lives of others.
As children, we anticipated role changes eagerly in our rush to grow up. Though fairy tales led us to believe that “happily ever after” was a final destination, the truth is that life is a series of destinations, mere stops on a long journey filled with differing terrain. We may need to move through a feeling of resistance as we shift from spouse to parent, leader to subordinate, caregiver to receiver, or even local to newcomer. It can be helpful to bid a fond farewell to the role that we are leaving before we welcome the new. This is the purpose of ceremonies in cultures throughout the world and across time. We can choose from any in existence or create our own to help us celebrate our life shifts and embrace our new adventures.
Like actors on the stage of the world, our different roles are just costumes that we inhabit and then shed. Each role we play gives us another perspective through which to understand ourselves and the nature of the universe. When we take a moment to see that each change can be an adventure, a celebration, and a chance to play a new part, we may even be able to recapture the joyful anticipation of our youth as we transition from one role to the next. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“It is the privilege of wisdom to listen,” Oliver Wendell Holmes once wrote. If I try as hard as I can to cultivate the art of listening — uncritically and without making premature judgments — chances are great that I’ll progress more rapidly in my recovery. If I try as hard as I can to listen to the feelings and thoughts expressed — rather than to the “speaker” — I may be blessed with an unexpectedly helpful idea. The essential quality of good listening is humility, which reflects the fact that God’s voice speaks to us even through the least of most inarticulate of His children. Does a holier-than-thou attitude sometimes close my mind to the shared suggestions of others?
Today I Pray
May my Higher Power keep me from being “holier-than-thou” with anyone whose manner or language or opposite point of view or apparent lack of knowledge turns me off to what they are saying. May I be listening always for the voice of God, which can be heard through the speech of any one of us.
Today I Will Remember
Hear the speech, not the speaker.
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One More Day
We should not let our fears hold us back from pursuing our hopes.
– John F. Kennedy
Regardless of our situation, we all need to hope. When we were young we were in a hurry all the time. Every problem needed a quick solution. And our anticipated futures were completely untarnished by adult viewpoints.
Sometimes, what we mislabel as a fear of dying might really be regret that we haven’t led a full enough life. We know now what is reasonable and what i snot. We understand where we are in our lives and accept that ideal situations may not come to pass. We have learned that we must come to terms with who we are and what we can do. We have learned that we are okay just as we are today.
I have come to terms with where I am in my life. My fears will not hold me back anymore.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
BEFORE AND AFTER
"The Light of God surrounds me.
The Love of God enfolds me.
The Power of God protects me.
The Presence of God watches over me.
Wherever I am, God is ... and all is well."
James Dillet Freeman
Before I found the Twelve Steps, I was walking in darkness.
Now God's Light is all around me.
Before I found the Twelve Steps, I was lonely and felt no one cared.
Now I'm enveloped in God's love.
Before I found the Twelve Steps, my life was out of control.
Now God is the Higher Power in my life.
Before I found the Twelve Steps, I was lost in my disease of compulsion.
Now God looks out for me.
Before I found the Twelve Steps, I was isolated and alone.
Now anywhere I go, I know I don't go there by myself …
for God is with me.
One Day at a Time . . .
I remember that wherever I am,
God is ...
And all is well.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.
Being convinced, WE WERE AT STEP THREE, which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understand Him. - Pg. 60 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
If we are in the program on a basis of 'temporary permanence' (we'll stay until we find something better), then we need to re-evaluate. Addiction is cunning, baffling, and powerful and will always convince us it's better than sobriety. We can only make this program if we commit ourselves each day, every day.
This hour I will not take a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort of any mind-affecting chemical.
Who Am I?
Today I will ask this question over and over again. I will not expect an answer. I will ask for the sake of asking, I will ask in order to put my mind in the frame of searching for a deeper life of the spirit, I will ask to be guided, toward awareness of all that is eternal. I will ask this question throughout my life without ever expecting or insisting upon an answer. I understand that God lives in the asking, that God is too great and vast to reduce to any simple answer, that God lives in the question.
I am curious about the deeper mysteries of this life.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Through the Fourth and Fifth steps we learn who we really are. Once we know who and what we are, we don't have to be what we were.
Today, I am myself. I am perfect for the part.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You must allow people to be right, because it consoles them for not being anything else.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am reaching out to those who love and support me. I am letting go of my ego and self-centeredness so that I can make space to take in love and support and ideas from others.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My parents tried to save me from an unhappy childhood but I thwarted them and had one anyway. - Charlie C.
bluidkiti
07-20-2015, 09:31 AM
July 21
Daily Reflections
A PRICELESS GIFT
By this time in all probability we have gained some measure of
release from our more devastating handicaps. We enjoy moments in
which there is something like real peace of mind. To those of us who
have hitherto known only excitement, depression, or anxiety--in other
words, to all of us--this newfound peace is a priceless gift.
12 & 12, p. 74
I am learning to let go and let God, to have a mind that is open and a
heart that is willing to receive God's grace in all my affairs; in this
way I can experience the peace and freedom that come as a result
of surrender. It has been proven that an act of surrender,
originating in desperation and defeat, can grow into an ongoing act
of faith, and that faith means freedom and victory.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
If we feel the need of saying something to put another member on the
right track, we should try to say it with understanding and
sympathy, not with a critical attitude. We should keep everything
out in the open and aboveboard. The A.A. program is wonderful, but
we must really follow it. We must all pull together or we'll all be
sunk. We enjoy the privilege of being associated with A.A. and we
are entitled to all its benefits. But gossip and criticism are not
tolerance, and tolerance is an A.A. principle that is absolutely
necessary to group unity. Am I truly tolerant of all my group's
members?
Meditation For The Day
"Faith can move mountains." That expression means that faith can
change any situation in the field of personal relationships. If you
trust Him, God shows you the way to "move mountains." If you are
humble enough to know that you can really do little by yourself to
change a situation, if you have enough faith to ask God to give you
the power you need, and if you are grateful enough for the grace He
gives you, you can "move mountains." Situations will be changed for
the better by your presence.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have enough faith to make me really effective. I
pray that I may learn to depend less on myself and more on God.
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As Bill Sees It
The Hour of Decision, p. 202
"Not all large decisions can be well made by simply listing the pros and
cons of a given situation, helpful and necessary as this process is. We
cannot always depend on what seems to us to be logical. When there
is doubt about our logic, we wait upon God and listen for the voice of
intuition. If, in meditation, that voice is persistent enough, we may
well gain sufficient confidence to act upon that, rather than upon logic.
"If, after an exercise of these two disciplines, we are still uncertain,
then we should ask for further guidance, and, when possible, defer
important decisions for a time. By then, with more knowledge of our
situation, logic and intuition may well agree upon a right course.
"But if the decision must be now, let us not evade it through fear.
Right or wrong, we can always profit from the experience."
Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
Creating good impressions
Attitude
There's a saying that we have only one chance to make a good first impression. That's true, but we always have the opportunity to make good lasting impressions.
The secret of making good impressions is contained in one word: ATTITUDE. Whatever we really feel will be expressed to others as our true character and the impression we give will be authentically us.
The way to control the impressions we are making is simply to continue cultivating an attitude that's consistent with humility, acceptance, and graciousness. We should have others' best interests at heart without being meddlesome. We should be genuinely helpful.
This attitude will create any good impressions we need to make.
Working to make sure I'm thinking the right way. I'll forget about the impressions I'm making. If my attitude is right, the impression will take care of itself.
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Keep It Simple
There is no human problem which could not be solved if people would simply do as I advise. ---Gore Vidal
Many of us used a "know it all" act to keep people away. We kept everyone around us on edge. They were afraid of our judgments, just we were secretly afraid of theirs. Why were we so busy with everyone else's life? So we didn't have to look at our own! We were afraid of what was happening to us. But we didn't want to see how sick we were becoming. Now we're not afraid. We don't need to keep people away. We don't need to run their lives. We have our life to live. And we're enjoying it.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are the expert, not me. Teach me. I am Your student.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list the ways I chased away those who cared about me.. I'll work on the Steps on these items for the next week.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I wake each morning with the thrill of expectation and the joy of being truly alive. And I'm thankful for this day. --Angela L. Wozniak
Being open to the day's offering, all of it, and looking for the positive experiences therein, becomes habit only after a firm commitment and dedicated practice. Today is special for each of us.
These next twenty-four hours will be unlike all others. And we are not the persons we were, even as recently as yesterday. Looking forward to all of the day's events, with the knowledge that we are in the care of our higher power, in every detail, frees us to make the most of everything that happens.
We have been given the gift of life. We are survivors. The odds against survival in our past make clear we have yet a job to do and are being given the help to do it. Confidence wavers in all of us, but the strength we need will be given to each of us.
In this day that stands before me, I can be certain that I'll have many chances for growth, for kindness to others, for developing confidence in myself. I will be thoughtful in my actions today. They are special and will be repeated no more.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If you are satisfied that he is a real alcoholic, begin to dwell on the hopeless feature of the malady. Show him, from your own experience, how the queer mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power. Don’t, at this stage, refer to this book, unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it. And be careful not to brand him as an alcoholic. Let him draw his own conclusion. If he sticks to the idea that he can still control his drinking, tell him that possibly he can—if he is not too alcoholic. But insist that if he is severely afflicted, there may be little chance he can recover by himself.
p. 92
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
Shortly after I was starting to work on the program, I relaized that I was not a good father. I wasn't a good husband, but, oh, I was a good provider. I never robbed my family of anything. I gave them everything, except the greatest thing in the world, and that is peace of mind. So I went to my wife and asked her if there wasn't something that she and I could do to somehow get together, and she turned on her heel and looked me squarely in the eye, and said, "You don't care anything about my problem," and I could have smacked her, but I said to myself, "Grab on to your serenity!"
p. 307
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
More realism and therefore more honesty about ourselves are the great gains we make under the influence of Step Five. As we took inventory, we began to suspect how much trouble self-delusion had been causing us. This had brought a disturbing reflection. If all our lives we had more or less fooled ourselves, how could we now be so sure that we weren't still self-deceived? How could we be certain that we had made a true catalog of our defects and had really admitted them, even to ourselves? Because we were still bothered by fear, self-pity, and hurt feelings, it was probable we couldn't appraise ourselves fairly at all. Too much guilt and remorse might cause us to dramatize and exaggerate our shortcomings. Or anger and hurt pride might be the smoke screen under which we were hiding some of our defects while we blamed others for them. Possibly, too, we were still handicapped by many liabilities, great and small, we never knew we had.
pp. 58-59
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Ability is what you're capable of doing... Motivation determines what
you do... Attitude determines how well you do it.
--unknown
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of
throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.
--Buddha
We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of
getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and
appreciating what we do have.
--Fredrick Koeing
Instead of being aggressive toward a difficulty, be quiet before it,
and notice the new feeling.
--Vernon Howard
P R O G R A M = People Relying On God Relay A Message.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
IGNORANCE
"Not ignorance, but ignorance of
ignorance is the death of
knowledge."
--Alfred North Whitehead
How little I understood when I was living as an alcoholic. How little
I wanted to know. Ignorance was bliss in my addiction. And the
real tragedy was that I was ignorant of the extent of my ignorance!
I had no idea how serious my alcoholism was, how pervasive in all
areas of my life it had developed, how destructive and negative I had
become until I was made to "see" reality in treatment. Reluctantly I
opened my eyes to see my ignorance and I knew I needed to change
my attitude if I was to recover.
The enemy of the spiritual life is ignorance because it stops us
from realizing that the strength and healing power of spirituality
has been given by God -- all we need do is discover it and appreciate
it.
I pray that I and others will have the courage to confront the
ignorance in my life.
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"Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty."
2 Corinthians 3:17
The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him.
The LORD is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that
seeketh Him.
Lamentations 3:24-25
"I am the Way, the Truth, and the Light. No one will come before My
Father except through me."
John 14:6
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Daily Inspiration
Forgiveness is a wonderful way to lift yourself up and it is the best way to encourage yourself and others to do better. Lord, grant me greater understanding and wisdom so that I can move past my problems into a new day.
Keep your feet firmly planted in your faith and your eyes raised to the heavens. Lord, You are my strength, my encouragement and my source of all that is good.
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NA Just For Today
Surrender Is For Everyone
"If, after a period of time, we find ourselves in trouble with our recovery, we have probably stopped doing one or more of the things that helped us in the earlier stages of our recovery."
Basic Text, p.92
Surrender is just for newcomers, right? Wrong!
After we've been around awhile, some of us succumb to a condition particular to old-timers. We think we know something about recovery, about God, about NA, about ourselves-and we do. The problem is, we think we know enough, and we think that merely knowing is enough. But it's what we learn and what we do after we think we know it all that really makes the difference.
Conceit and complacency can land us in deep trouble. When we find that "applying the principles" on our own power just isn't working, we can practice what worked for us in the beginning: surrender. When we find we are still powerless, our lives again unmanageable, we need to seek the care of a Power greater than ourselves. And when we discover that self-therapy isn't so therapeutic after all, we need to take advantage of "the therapeutic value of one addict helping another."
Just for today: I need guidance, support, and a Power beyond my own. I will go to a meeting, reach out to a newcomer, call my sponsor, pray to my Higher Power-I will do something that says, "I surrender."
pg. 211
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Dependency (on another human being) is the inability to experience wholeness or to function adequately without the certainty that one is being actively cared for by another. --M. Scott Peck
No matter what we may think, overdependence on another can be very unloving because it drains others of any chance for personal growth. Those of us who have been dependent on other people are so busy acquiring love that we ourselves have no energy left to truly give love. It's as if we're starving, and scrambling for every little bit of love we can find, with no thought to offering it to others. No wonder they often quickly get tired of us.
We can't force or expect others to do things with us, talk to us, or love us. The way to be surely loved is to be worthy of it. We can work at being worthy by exercising our freedom to feel and do things without others' permission, and to allow them the same opportunity.
What can I do on my own today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Some people regard themselves as perfect, but only because they demand little of themselves. --Hermann Hesse
Many of us men in this program have a struggle with perfectionism. This is a central spiritual issue. Sometimes we feel ashamed or frightened by our imperfections, or we strive so hard to overcome them that we successfully close our lives down to a very narrow, controllable scale. Spiritual awakening means we have zest for life and accept our imperfections.
We know today will be shaky and insecure in some ways. We probably will make some mistakes or offenses. Our solution is not our old behavior of attempting to control whatever happens; it is to join life with a spiritual feeling. We let go of ourselves, and what happens? We are part of a larger whole. We are not in control of the process of life, and whatever we do is part of an ongoing dialogue, so we will have another chance to respond, even to our own mistakes.
Today, I pray for liberation from my perfectionism so I can more fully engage in life's adventure.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I wake each morning with the thrill of expectation and the joy of being truly alive. And I'm thankful for this day. --Angela L. Wozniak
Being open to the day's offering, all of it, and looking for the positive experiences therein, becomes habit only after a firm commitment and dedicated practice. Today is special for each of us.
These next twenty-four hours will be unlike all others. And we are not the persons we were, even as recently as yesterday. Looking forward to all of the day's events, with the knowledge that we are in the care of our higher power, in every detail, frees us to make the most of everything that happens.
We have been given the gift of life. We are survivors. The odds against survival in our past make clear we have yet a job to do and are being given the help to do it. Confidence wavers in all of us, but the strength we need will be given to each of us.
In this day that stands before me, I can be certain that I'll have many chances for growth, for kindness to others, for developing confidence in myself. I will be thoughtful in my actions today. They are special and will be repeated no more.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Being Is Enough
We are not always clear about what we are experiencing, or why.
In the midst of grief, transition, transformation, learning, healing, or discipline - it's difficult to have perspective.
That's because we have not learned the lesson yet. We are in the midst of it. The gift of clarity has not yet arrived.
Our need to control can manifest itself as a need to know exactly what's going on. We cannot always know. Sometimes, we need to let ourselves be and trust that clarity will come later, in retrospect.
If we are confused, that is what we are supposed to be. The confusion is temporary. We shall see. The lesson, the purpose, shall reveal itself - in time, in its own time.
It will all make perfect sense - later.
Today, I will stop straining to know what I don't know, to see what I can't see, to understand what I don't yet understand. I will trust that being is sufficient, and let go of my need to figure things out.
Today I am open to everyone who is on my path, whether I know them or not. Somewhere there will be someone who needs my help and I want to be there for them. My Higher Power will tell me what needs to be done. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Value Work
We need to value the simple tasks of life and the workwe do professionally to earn income, fulfill purpose, and bring our gifts to the world.
There are many tasks to be done in life– our personal responsibilities to others, our professional commitments, our responsibilities to ourselves. There is value and honor in work, in performing the tasks that make up our daily lives.
When we joyfully perform the tasks of life– whether we’re taking care of ourselves or fulfilling a commitment to another– we connect with the very rhythms and workings of life and the universe. Many important spiritual lessons are connected with work. It’s better not to use work as an escape, a way to avoid life. But work done with an attitude of honor, love, and joy can be a tool on our spiritual path.
Work can take us into the rhythm of life. Work can bring us back to service, back to our hearts, back to our souls. We don’t have to leave ourselves behind when we do the tasks of life. We can take all we’ve learned into our work, then learn more lessons from the tasks we do.
Remember to honor and value the work and the tasks that are yours to do– from the smallest to the grandest. Wash the dishes, fold the laundry, hold a buisness meeting, rake the yard. Each task is important.
Value work. Let it connect you to the rhythms of life.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Maybe it’s not supposed to feel good
Every night for months, Laurie went home from work, turned on her computer, and wrote and rewrote the same thing: I hate my job. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
For six weeks in a row, Jonathan complained daily to his friends about his roommate: I can’t stand him. He’s driving me nuts. I don’t like him.
For years, right before falling asleep at night, Mindy calculated the number of years she thought it would be until her husband died and she was free from her wedding vows: Just fifteen more years, then he’ll be gone and I can have a life.
None of these three people were going through what we call a “love-hate” relationship with their spouse, roommate, or job. All three were involved in hate-hate relationships. They all had one thing in common: they felt guilty for how they felt. Laurie kept trying to make herself like her job; Jonathan turned himself inside out trying to get along with his roommate; Mindy continued trying to be a better wife.
Be patient with yourself if you have moments and times of not liking someone or something, whether it’s your job, your roommate, your home, or your spouse. But if you’re consistently and blatantly not liking someone or someplace, maybe it’s time to move on.
Watch for patterns in your emotional responses to your life. If you’re consistently responding to something or someone in a particular way, entertain the possibility that that person, place, or thing might have outworn its usefulness in your life.
God, grant me the wisdom to discern when my feelings are urging me to move on. Help me let go of my guilt about how I’m feeling and find a path with heart.
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In God’s Care
The goal isn’t to do a successful inventory. The goal is to dig to the deepest levels of self-honesty.
~~Anonymous
The Fourth Sep is the hardest one for many newcomers in the program. It is so difficult, in fact, that some of us still waiting to do it are no longer newcomers.
It’s so hard to be honest with ourselves, that some of us never accomplish it. The consequences of this are a low sef-esteem, which draws us toward failure.
Help is available, though. God, who knows all about us, is willing to help us get honest with ourselves. We only need to ask. Until we become honest with ourselves, we can’t grow spiritually.
Today I pledge to be honest.
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Day By Day
Judging other addicts
As addicts we tend to judge each other in a cruel way; it can help us feel better about ourselves. For example, alcoholics look down on junkies, junkies look down on speed freaks, and everyone looks down on glue-sniffers. But what’s the difference?
We’re all in this together. We’re dealing with life-and-death matters. Making value judgments about the kind or severity of another’s addiction is a childish and dangerous game.
Have I stopped judging other addicts?
Higher Power, help me accept myself – and accept others – in all aspects of life.
I will acknowledge someone addicted to another chemical today by…
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Food for Thought
Following the Rules
When we were eating compulsively, we thought we could make up our own rules as we went along. We thought we were entitled to eat what we wanted when we wanted it. The result was chaos. We found that living according to self-will did not work.
Commitment to the OA program involves the willingness to accept a set of rules, which we did not make. Following the abstinence guidelines is what enables us to control our disease. When we ignore the discipline, which has worked for others and insist on doing it our way, our chances for recovery diminish.
The rules of abstinence – three measured meals a day with nothing in between, no binge foods, a definite plan, etc. – are the means to freedom. To rebel against them is to delay or prevent our liberation from compulsive overeating.
I pray for the honesty to follow the rules.
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Things We Can’t Control
Allow, Trust
We develop grace as we learn with the guiding hand of the universe, life will unfold exactly the way it should.
The idea of trusting the universe is a popular one these days, but many of us don’t know what this really means and we often have a hard time doing it. This is partly because the story of humankind is most often presented as a story about struggle, control, and survival, instead of one of trust and collaboration with the universe. Yet, in truth, we need to adhere to both ideas in this life.
On the one hand, there is much to be said about exerting control over our environment. We created shelter to protect ourselves from the elements. We hunted for animals and invented agriculture to feed ourselves. We built social infrastructures to protect ourselves and create community. This is how we survive and grow as a civilization. However, it is also clear that there are plenty of things that we cannot control, no matter how hard we try, and we often receive support from an unseen force – a universe that provides us with what we cannot provide for ourselves.
It is a good idea to take responsibility for the things in life that we can control or create. We work so we can feed, clothe, and shelter our loved ones and ourselves. We manifest our dreams and visions in physical form with hard work and forethought. But at a certain point, when we have done all that we can, we must let go and allow the universe to take over. This requires trust. It requires a trust that runs deeper than just expecting things to turn out the way we want them to. Sometimes they will, and sometimes they won’t. We develop equanimity and grace as we learn to trust that, with the guiding hand of the universe, life will unfold exactly the way it should. We are engaged in an ongoing relationship with a universe that responds to our thoughts and actions. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we’re faced with some condition or situation not to our liking, how can we have faith that all things are working together for good? Perhaps we have to ask ourselves just what is faith. Faith has its foundation in truth and love. We can have faith, if we so choose, no matter what the situation. And, if we so choose, we can expect ultimate good to come forth. Have I made my choice?
Today I Pray
May I be grateful for my God-given ability to make a choice. Out of this gratitud3e and my sense of the nearness of God, I have chosen faith. May the faith, as my chosen way, become strong enough to move mountains, strong enough to keep me free of my compulsion, mighty enough to hold back the tide of temptations which threaten me, optimistic enough to look past my present pain to ultimate good.
Today I Will Remember
With faith, nothing is impossible.
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One More Day
An hour of pain is a long as a day of pleasure.
– Proverb
When we look back at our lives, do the painful experiences come through first? We may remember the difficult times that led to the end of a relationship or losing a job. Life seemed at a standstill during those times, as we wondered whether we’d ever get close to another person, find another job, or feel confident again.
We probably learned much later that failures could be opportunities for growth. As we sift through our hardest memories, we can settle back into the happy once again, knowing we have learned and grown from our pain. And as our “hour” of pain comes to an end, we can see the large and small pleasures of today and remember those of yesterday.
I will not let pain obscure my joys and pleasures.
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One Day At A Time
GROWING OLDER
“I think, therefore I am.”
Rene Descartes
Before beginning my recovery process with our online groups, I used to look in the mirror and want to cry. I'm not a young, lovely creature anymore. I'm showing my age. Inside I'm still a young girl, but now I have a grandma's face.
The Twelve Steps to recovery have opened up a whole new world to me ~ and it is a world that is ageless. Its principles are timeless: honesty, hope, faith, courage, integrity, willingness, humility, love, forgiveness, self-discipline, perseverance, spiritual awareness and service. Maturing without benefit of these principles would be choosing to simply get old.
Through my program of recovery, I have been inspired to keep my body strong and well -- the way my Higher Power made it. I am encouraged to stay as attractive as possible for as long as possible, out of concern for myself and for others. By the time I reached the 9th Step, the worry lines in my face began to soften … now they look like smile lines. It seems that participating in our program of recovery has reversed my age.
One day at a time...
I will grow older, but also much wiser.
~ SAG
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We have shown how we get out from under. You say, 'Yes, I'm willing. But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring, and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?'
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. If is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you. - Pg. 152 - A Vision For You
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is now time to forgive ourselves for the trials of our addiction and it is time to forgive others who let us down. We are not well yet, but have made the first giant steps: admittance of our disease and forgiveness for not being well yesterday.
Grant me the humbleness to work for and accept my marker tokens knowing I could not do it alone. Grant me the pride to realize that without me it could not be done at all.
Spirit Calls
I am willing to allow my life to happen. Life has taught me that the best laid plans can go awry. I know that I need to have goals and missions in order to give shape, meaning and a sense of destiny to my life. However, when I let those goals run me, when I let them preoccupy me to such an extent that I stop living in the present and I miss the beauty and spontaneity of each new day, then I am becoming a slave to my own plans. I will learn to take an action and let go of the result, to have a goal then to move toward it in a relaxed manner that doesn't rob me of my pleasure and my day.
I am in touch with spirit within and without
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
When making amends, a subtle shift occurs in our thinking. We go from thinking we were a mistake to acknowledging we made a mistake.
I may make mistakes but my Higher Power doesn't and my Higher Power made me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You can't run from God, so let God run you.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am open to everyone who is on my path, whether I know them or not. Somewhere there will be someone who needs my help and I want to be there for them. My Higher Power will tell me what needs to be done.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Poor me, poor me...pour me a drink. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
07-21-2015, 06:22 AM
July 22
Daily Reflections
"THE GOOD AND THE BAD"
"My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good
and bad."
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76
The joy of life is in the giving. Being freed of my shortcomings, that I
may more freely be of service, allows humility to grow in me. My
shortcomings can be humbly placed in God's loving care and be
removed. The essence of Step Seven is humility, and what better
way to seek humility than by giving all of myself--good and bad--to
God, so that He may remove the bad and return to me the good.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
One of the finest things about A.A. is the diversity of its
membership. We come from all walks and stations of life. All types
and classes of people are represented in an A.A. group. Being
different from each other in certain ways, we can each make a
different contribution to the whole. Some of us are weak in one
respect, but strong in another. A.A. can use the strong points of all
its members and can disregard the weaknesses. A.A. is strong, not
only because we all have the same problem, but also because of the
diversified talents of its members. Each can contribute his part. Do I
recognize the good points of all my group's members?
Meditation For The Day
"And greater works than these shall ye do." Each individual has the
ability to do good works through the power of God's spirit. This is the
wonder of the world, the miracle of the earth, that God's power goes
out to bless the human race through the agency of so many people who
are actuated by His grace. We need not be held back by doubt,
despondency and fear. A wonderful future can lie before any person
who depends on God's power, a future of unlimited power to do good
works.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not limit myself by doubting. I pray that I may have
confidence that I can be effective for good.
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As Bill Sees It
True Tolerance, p. 203
Gradually we began to be able to accept the other fellow's sins as well
as his virtues. We coined the potent and meaningful expression "Let
us always love the best in others--and never fear their worst."
********************************
Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are to
some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong. When this
happens, we approach true tolerance and we see what real love for
our fellows actually means.
1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. 12 & 12, p. 92
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Walk In Dry Places
The Right Place for my Type
The Right Work
"You cannot change your type, but you can make yourself a brilliant success I that type," Wrote Emmet Fox. This is a reminder for people who are discontented with their lot in life, and this includes most people who participate in 12 Step programs.
There are many different TYPES of people, and all types are good. We only need t find where our type is required and then do our best in that place. We will have immediate advantages, because all of our energies and talents will then be applied in the right way.
We should never spend a moment envying other types of people who are brilliantly successful in their activities. Our happiness is to be found in our place, not theirs.
If I'm doing what's right for my type, I'll give it my very best. If I'm in the wrong place, I'll know that my Higher Power is guiding me toward the right outlet for my talents.
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Keep It Simple
. . . for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you. ---Luke 17:21
We want so much to be good. Even when we used alcohol or other drugs, we wanted to believe we were good people. But we often felt we couldn't measure up. We thought we had to live by a set of rules that we could never follow.
Now we're finding the goodness inside us. Goodness isn't something we do. Goodness is just being what we already are. Our Higher Power speaks to us in many ways, including through our hearts and minds. We don't have to try so hard top be good. We just learn to relax and invite our Higher Power to be part of our lives.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have put peace, knowledge, love and joy in my heart today. Help me to always find these things.
Action for the Day: How's my Higher Power like a loving king or queen? How can I have a kingdom inside me? I'll talk with my sponsor about this today.
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Each Day a New Beginning
How I relate to my inner self-influences my relationships with all others. My satisfaction with myself and my satisfaction with other people are directly proportional. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh
Hateful attitudes toward others, resistance to someone's suggestions, jealousy over another woman's attractiveness or particular abilities are equally strong indications of the health of our spiritual programs. Our security rests with God. When that relationship is nurtured, the rewards will be many and satisfactions great.
Our inner selves may need pampering and praise. They have suffered the abuse of neglect for many years, no doubt. In many instances we have chided ourselves, perhaps shamed ourselves. Learning to love our inner selves, recognizing the value inherent in our very existence, takes effort, commitment, and patience--assets we may only just now be developing in this recovery program.
Our inner selves are the home of our Spirit wherein our attachment to all strength, all courage, all self-esteem, and all serenity resides. Our Spirit is one with our higher power. We must acknowledge the presence and utilize the comforts offered.
My relationships with others are as healthy and fulfilling as my communication with God.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Continue to speak of alcoholism as an illness, a fatal malady. Talk about the conditions of body and mind which accompany it. Keep his attention focussed mainly on your personal experience. Explain that many are doomed who never realize their predicament. Doctors are rightly loath to tell alcoholic patients the whole story unless it will serve some good purpose. But you may talk to him about the hopelessness of alcoholism because you offer a solution. You will soon have your friend admitting he has many, if not all, of the traits of the alcoholic. If his own doctor is willing to tell him that he is alcoholic, so much the better. Even though your protégé may not have entirely admitted his condition, he has become very curious to know how you got well. Let him ask you that question, if he will. Tell him exactly what happened to you. Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that He does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles.
When dealing with such a person, you had better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles. There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused. Don’t raise such issues, no matter what your own convictions are.
pp. 92-93
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
She left, and I sat down and crossed my hands and looked up and said, "For God's sake, help me." And then a silly, simple thought came to me. I didn't know anything about being a father' I didn't know how to come home and work weekends like other husbands. I didn't know how to entertain my family. But I remembered that every night after dinner my wife would get up and do the dishes. Well, I could do the dishes. So I went to her and said, "There's only one thing I want in my whole life, and I don't want any commendation; I don't want any credit; I don't want anything from you or Janey for the rest of your life except one thing, and that is the opportunity to do anything you want always, and I would like to start off by doing the dishes." And now I am doing the darn dishes every night!
p. 307
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Hence it was most evident that a solitary self-appraisal, and the admission of our defects based upon that alone, wouldn't be nearly enough. We'd have to have outside help if we were surely to know and admit the truth about ourselves--the help of God and another human being. Only by discussing ourselves, holding back nothing, only by being willing to take advice and accept direction could we set foot on the road to straight thinking, solid honesty, and genuine humility.
p. 59
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"Success is a journey, not a destination."
--Ben Sweetland
A good laugh heals a lot of hurts.
--Madeleine L'Engle
Peace is the ability to wait patiently in spite of panic brought on by
uncertainty.
--Stress Fractures, p.50
Worrying and fear are the opposite of love. Love yourself more than
you ever have. Love yourself enough to stop worrying. Love yourself
enough to give yourself the gift of peace.
--Melody Beattie
It is easy to love those who are at their best. But it is during those
times we are unlovable that we may need love the most. And what a
beautiful thing when we get it. And even more beautiful when we find
the grace to give it.
--unknown
"May the sun always shine on your windowpane;
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain;
May the hand of a friend always be near you;
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you."
--Irish Blessing
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LIVING
"It is not death that a man
should fear, but he should fear
never beginning to live."
--Marcus Aurelius
For years I did not live I simply existed. What many people take
for granted I did not have: friends, vacations, job satisfaction,
gratitude, family, communication and love of self. An aspect of my
disease, my denial, was that I thought I was happy without having
any evidence for such a feeling. Indeed, my lifestyle indicated
progressive isolation. That's illusion. A recovering alcoholic priest
shared that early in recovery he saw a sunset and remarked, "How
long has that been happening?" Like him, I missed so much!
Life is to be lived or endured. My spiritual recovery means that
every day I reach out to life and grasp it, hold it, smell it--and smile.
God of life, let me live today. Let my "high" be the glory of the day.
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My sheep recognize my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one will snatch them away from me, for my Father has given them to me, and he is more powerful than anyone else. So no one can take them from me. The Father and I are one."
Luke 10: 27-30
The LORD's loving kindnesses indeed never cease, for His
compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Thy
faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23
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Daily Inspiration
When things go wrong, it is far more productive to see if you can learn something from it rather than just getting upset. Lord, help me to remain peaceful and patient enough in my trying moments so that in some way I can grow from them.
God will give you strength because He gives of Himself. Lord, bless us, deliver us from all evil, and bring us to everlasting life.
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NA Just For Today
Spiritual Death
"For us, to use is to die, often in more ways than one."
Basic Text, p.78
As newcomers, many of us came to our first meeting with only a small spark of life remaining. That spark, our spirit, wants to survive. Narcotics Anonymous nurtures that spirit. The love of the fellowship quickly fans that spark into a flame. With the Twelve Steps and the love of other recovering addicts, we begin to blossom into that whole, vital human being our Higher Power intended us to be. We begin to enjoy life, finding purpose in our existence. Each day we choose to stay clean, our spirit is revitalized and our relationship with our God grows. Our spirit becomes stronger each day we choose life by staying clean.
Despite the fact that our new life in recovery is rewarding, the urge to use can sometimes be overwhelming. When everything in our lives seems to go wrong, a return to using can seem like the only way out. But we know what the consequence will be if we use - the loss of our carefully nurtured spirituality. We have traveled too far along the spiritual path to dishonor our spirit by using. Snuffing the spiritual flame we have worked so hard to restore in our recovery is too dear a price to pay for getting high.
Just for today: I am grateful that my spirit is strong and vital. Today, I will honor that spirit by staying clean.
pg. 212
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A good laugh heals a lot of hurts. --Madeleine L'Engle
The ability to laugh at ourselves has always been important. In old days, fools and jesters held an important place in the royal courts. Today we have clowns who make us laugh.
If we look closely at a clown's face, we will often notice a bit of sadness around the eyes. Clowns are able to move easily from sad expressions to ones full of delight very easily. For all of us, laughter and tears come from the same deep well inside. And often, after a good cry, we find ourselves ready to laugh, easily and joyfully.
Laughter is a gift waiting for us on the other side of our sadness.
Can I begin to laugh by smiling now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Suffering is a journey, which has an end. --Matthew Fox
Pain is part of life. To live a masculine spiritual life, we need a way to understand the suffering we sometimes endure. Looking back at other difficult times can give us a better perspective of the pain we feel today. All of us can recall a loss or a sudden difficult change that we never would have chosen for ourselves. Perhaps it brought us face to face with insecurities or doubts about our survival. Now, after the suffering has ended, we see how much we grew. We changed; we were strengthened and, perhaps, were liberated by what happened to us.
Thoughts about today's suffering may not be clear as to what good it holds for us. But we are on a journey, and it can only happen one step at a time. We know that journeys teach us great lessons and they do have endings. Our pain today affirms that we are vital and alive people. We know others suffer as we do, and we can turn to each other to give and receive comfort while we are on the journey.
My pain will teach me something I need to know, and it will have an end. I will pay attention to its lessons.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
How I relate to my inner self-influences my relationships with all others. My satisfaction with myself and my satisfaction with other people are directly proportional. --Sue Atchley Ebaugh
Hateful attitudes toward others, resistance to someone's suggestions, jealousy over another woman's attractiveness or particular abilities are equally strong indications of the health of our spiritual programs. Our security rests with God. When that relationship is nurtured, the rewards will be many and satisfactions great.
Our inner selves may need pampering and praise. They have suffered the abuse of neglect for many years, no doubt. In many instances we have chided ourselves, perhaps shamed ourselves. Learning to love our inner selves, recognizing the value inherent in our very existence, takes effort, commitment, and patience--assets we may only just now be developing in this recovery program.
Our inner selves are the home of our Spirit wherein our attachment to all strength, all courage, all self-esteem, and all serenity resides. Our Spirit is one with our higher power. We must acknowledge the presence and utilize the comforts offered.
My relationships with others are as healthy and fulfilling as my communication with God.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Learning to Trust Again
Many of us have trust issues.
Some of us tried long and hard to trust untrustworthy people. Over and again, we believed lies and promises never to be kept. Some of us tried to trust people for the impossible; for instance, trusting a practicing alcoholic not to drink again.
Some of us trusted our Higher Power inappropriately. We trusted God to make other people do what we wanted, then felt betrayed when that didn't work out.
Some of us were taught that life couldn't be trusted, that we had to control and manipulate our way through.
Most of us were taught, inappropriately, that we couldn't trust ourselves.
In recovery, we're healing from our trust issues. We're learning to trust again. The first lesson in trust is this: We can learn to trust ourselves. We can be trusted. If others have taught us we cannot trust ourselves, they were lying. Addictions and dysfunctional systems make people lie.
We can learn to appropriately trust our Higher Power - not to make people do what we wanted them to, but to help us take care of ourselves, and to bring about the best possible circumstances, at the best possible times, in our life.
We can trust the process - of life and recovery. We do not have to control, obsess, or become hypervigilant. . We may not always understand where we are going, or what's being worked out in us, but we can trust that something good is happening.
When we learn to do this, we are ready to learn to trust other people. When we trust our Higher Power and when we trust ourselves, we will know who to trust and what to trust that person for.
Perhaps we always did. We just didn't listen closely enough to ourselves or trust what we heard.
Today, I will affirm that I can learn to trust appropriately. I can trust Higher Power, my recovery, and myself. I can learn to appropriately trust others too.
Today I am growing in my faith that I dare to look at what is really disturbing my serenity. Today I trust that by searching deep within for my own truth, I will discover the door to freedom and peace. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Take a Trip
I met the three women at the Ojo Caliente hot springs in New Mexico. Two were in their fifties, one was in her sixties. They splashed around in the mineral water in the steam pool. They looked happy, alive. “We only live two hours away, but twice a year we come here together.It heals us, renews us, and sends us back to our lives changed.”
Is there someplace you’d like to travel to? Do you have time off from work, time that you could use creatively? Do you have a long weekend coming up? How would you like to spend that?
Vacations and trips are important. They give us a chance to get away, see someplace new, rest, and refresh our spirits. Trips often synchronize with growth and change in our lives. They celebrate what we’ve been through or what we’re going through. A trip can correlate with a new leg on our journey in spiritual growth. Often, when we feel the urge to travel, it’s connected to a deeper urge, the urge to go somewhere new on our path.
Recognize the desire in your heart to travel and see new horizons. Then honor it, for it reveals your desire to touch new horizons in your life.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Stop depriving yourself
Stop depriving yourself of what feels comfortable, right, and good to you.
Some of us grew up in environments that were emotionally deprived. Being happy and enjoying life wasn’t allowed. Emotional deprivation was the theme.
Many of us learned to continue this pattern in our adult lives. We chose relationships with people who didn’t feel good to us. We chose jobs that felt uncomfortable.
Many of us have heard stories of people who are addicted to feeling miserable. It’s easy to see when other people are fostering deprivation and misery in their lives, it’s more difficult to discern when the person is us.
We may be so used to feeling bad that we genuinely don’t know what feels right to us.
You won’t know what feels right to you until you relax and learn to identify how you feel. Let go of your attraction to misery. Walk toward what feels comfortable to your heart, mind, body, and soul.
Lighten up. Let yourself get comfortable with what feels good to you.
Do you know what feels good? Do you know what you like? One day, a friend was getting his back rubbed, “That feels good,” he said. “It’s supposed to,” the person rubbing his back said to him.
Become conscious as you go through your daily life. Go on a treasure hunt. Find out what feels good to you. You just might discover that there are more treasures and pleasures in this world than you thought.
God, help me stop depriving myself of the good things in life.
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In God’s Care
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are.
~~George Bernard Shaw
It’s easy to let circumstances determine how we think and behave. While it’s true that some events seem devastating, our relationship with a Higher Power can help us accept and even grow from experiences that seem impossible to cope with.
We all have known men and women who’ve handled grave upsets far more easily than we have. How did they do it? They have no magic. Rather, they may be more comfortable letting their Higher Power help them accept and understand unfortunate circumstances. Once we accept our anger or disappointment, we’re free to move on to better feelings. We begin to realize we have choices in how we look at problems.
We are never given more than we can handle. We can develop acceptance of any circumstances, but our success in doing so comes mainly through our reliance on God to show us the way.
God will help me handle the uncontrollable events of today. Through acceptance. I can change my feelings at any moment – even right now.
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Day By Day
Being rational
As practicing addicts, we were impulsive. We just did what we felt like doing. We didn’t think things through. Actually, we didn’t think much at all. We often acted irrationally.
As recovering addicts, we may still have some distored ideas and may still behave irrationally at times. That’s okay. But if what we’re doing seems serious to our sponsor or a couple of recovering friends, we need to talk more about our actions.
Am I learning to use reason to test my actions?
Higher Power, help me plant both feet on the ground and to practice sharing my thoughts.
I will talk with my sponsor today about..
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Food for Thought
The Power of Abstaining
Abstaining from compulsive overeating fills us with new strength. When we become honest and determined in this area of our life, our resolution and clarity flow into other areas, too. The new order and discipline are reflected in all that we do.
We establish abstinence as the most important thing in our life. As mind and body are released from the dullness and apathy caused by too much food, we are more efficient and we function more effectively. Other priorities and values sort themselves out. Instead of being torn by conflicting desires, we are able to decide which projects and activities are of most value. Instead of being paralyzed by fear and depression, we have the motivation and energy to do what needs to be done.
Accepting life-long abstinence as the will of our Higher Power enables us to push food out of the center of our life.
Thank You for the power of abstaining.
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Just Being There
Acting as a Guardian by Madisyn Taylor
To act as a guardian to somebody during a difficult time is a most beautiful gift of support.
One of the greatest gifts we can give another human being is to act as their guardian. Whether this gift is related to a specific situation or is representative of an ongoing commitment, we each benefit from the association. To protect someone is to walk with them in challenging times and see them through safely to the other side. In doing this, we grow with them. And those under our guardianship derive confidence from our support and assistance, enabling them to persevere through almost any conditions.
There are many reasons we feel inspired to serve as guardians to those we care for. Sometimes just holding the space for somebody allows them to do what is necessary to grow or heal. We may simply want to see that our friend or loved one is taken care of and equipped to prevail over difficult circumstances. We may also sense that we are in possession of knowledge our loved ones are lacking yet need in their current stage of development. Our offer to serve as a guardian may also be both unsolicited and unrelated to any one situation. Instead of helping someone we care about cope with a specific challenge, we may find ourselves providing them with a more general form of emotional sustenance that prepares and strengthens them for challenges yet to come.
Our ability to empathize with those under our guardianship is our greatest asset because our comprehension of their needs allows us to determine how we can best serve them. Even when this comprehension is limited, however, the loving intentions with which we enter into our role as guardian ensure that our care and protection help others grow as individuals while living their lives with grace. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The Program has taught me that the essence of all growth for me is a willingness to change for the getter. Following that, I must have further willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails, and to courageously take every action that is required.
“I am and know and will;
I am knowing and willing;
I know myself to be and to will;
I will to be and to know.”
– Saint Augustine3
Is willingness a key ingredient of my life and the way I work The Program?
Today I Pray
I pray for willingness to do what I can, willingness to be what I can be — and what is sometimes hardest — willingness to be what I am. I pray, too, for energies to carry out my willingness in all that I do, so that I may grow in the ways of God and practice the principles of The Program in all my affairs.
Today I Will Remember
“I am and know and will.”
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One More Day
We must believe in the conquest of the spirit of the world by the spirit of God. But, the miracle must happen in us, before it can happen in the world.
– Albert Schweitzer
There is a time in the progression of life or pain or illness when we realize that no matter how extensive our resources are, no matter how deep our emotional well, we cannot depend only upon ourselves. We all recognize that time when it’s at hand; no one has to inform us.
Even if our faith has been shaken before, we are able, once again, to reach out to a Power greater than ourselves. Our Higher Power offers reassurance that even as we continue to adjust, even when we have coped as well as we cna, a greater comfort and care is open to us.
I can’t control everything. I find freedom and relief in knowing I don’t have to.
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One Day At A Time
FALSE BELIEFS
"There is only one cause of unhappiness;
the false beliefs you have in your head,
beliefs so widespread, so commonly held,
that it never occurs to you to question them."
Anthony de Mello
As a child of poverty, neglect, and a family that moved frequently, I was always an "outsider." I was looked on as "unacceptable." As an adult I moved away, married, and lived in the same community all the rest of my years. I've had the same friends and lived a very respected life. Yet internally I was still "unacceptable" ~ always feeling "less than" others. I never even told my husband or children about those aspects of my childhood. There were parts of me I never shared with anyone. I did not question the idea that I was still an "unacceptable" person, though there was lots of evidence to discount that idea.
Since joining The Recovery Group program and sharing that pain with my sponsor and others, that pain-filled inner child has been freed and has integrated with the person that I am today. This freeing process has enabled me to finally see and feel the love, the acceptance, and the respect that has always been there for me.
One day at a time...
I will reach out to others at meetings and within our Recovery Group ~ especially those who have had a childhood similar to mine. It has been a tremendous gift to be able to go back, take that neglected little girl by the hand, and bring her into my world to live with me.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
VII - THE TWELVE CONCEPTS (SHORT FORM)
A.A's Twelve Steps are principles for personal recovery. The Twelve Traditions ensure the unity of the Fellowship. Written by co-founder Bill W. in 1962, the Twelve Concepts for World Service provide a group of A.A.'s service structure remain responsive and responsible to those they serve.
The 'short form' of the Concepts, which follows, was prepared by the 1974 General Service Conference. - Pg. 574 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - VII - The Twelve Concepts (Short Form)
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
In this first month, we name our disease: ADDICTION. It is not chemical specific. A mind-affecting chemical of any kind can trigger our disease of addiction. If we try to say we have trouble with only one chemical (like pot or alcohol) then we do not yet understand addiction and will probably use again.
Please reveal to me the true nature of my disease that I may truly recover.
Transformation
Count me in. Whatever are my talents, my usefulness; wherever you see me fitting into your grand scheme, God . . . place me there. I am willing to open my heart to your guidance. I am built to be part of this moment of transformation. I see a better world in my mind's eye and I know that others see it too. Connect me with those people who wish to quietly usher in a new world. Together we can push through the eye of the needle - together we can help it happen.
We are transforming together
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Earth Angels dwell among us and they will find you at the moment you need them. These are the people who know just the right thing to say and do to keep you focused on recovery and principle.
Some of my Higher Power's best work is done anonymously.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Are you doing your meds? Meditations.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am growing in my faith that I dare to look at what is really disturbing my serenity. Today I trust that by searching deep within for my own truth, I will discover the door to freedom and peace.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm not only one drink away from a drunk, I'm one drink away from maybe never being sober again for the rest of my life. - Anon.
bluidkiti
07-22-2015, 06:40 AM
July 23
Daily Reflections
I ASK GOD TO DECIDE
"I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character
which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows."
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76
Having admitted my powerlessness and made a decision to turn my will
and my life over to the care of God, as I understand Him, I don't
decide which defects get removed, or the order in which defects get
removed, or the time frame in which they get removed. I ask God to
decide which defects stand in the way of my usefulness to Him and to
others, and then I humbly ask Him to remove them.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We should remember that all A.A.'s have "clay feet." We should not
set any member upon a pedestal and mark her or him out as a perfect
A.A. Its not fair to the person to be singled out in this fashion and if
the person is wise she or he will not wish it. If the person we single
out as an ideal A.A. has a fall, we are in danger of falling, too. Without
exception, we are all only one drink away from a drunk, no matter how
long we have been in A.A. Nobody is entirely safe. A.A. itself should
be our ideal, not any particular member of it. Am I putting my trust in
A.A. principles and not in any one member of the group?
Meditation For The Day
The inward peace that comes from trust in God truly passes all
understanding. That peace no one can take from you. No person has
the power to disturb that inner peace. But you must be careful not to
let in the world's worries and distractions. You must try not to give
entrance to fears and despondency. You must refuse to open the door
to distractions that disturb your inward peace. Make it a point to allow
nothing today to disturb your inner peace, your heart-calm.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not allow those about me to spoil my peace of mind. I
pray that I may keep a deep inner calm throughout the day.
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As Bill Sees It
The Building Of Character, p. 204
Since most of us are born with an abundance of natural desires, it isn't
strange that we often let these far exceed their intended purpose.
When they drive us blindly, or we willfully demand that they supply us
with more satisfactions or pleasures than are possible or due us, that is
the point at which we depart from the degree of perfection that God
wishes for us here on earth. That is the measure of our character
defects, or, if you wish, of our sins.
If we ask, God will certainly forgive our derelictions. But in no case
does he render us white as snow and keep us that way without our
cooperation. That is something we are supposed to be willing to work
toward ourselves. He asks only that we try as best we know how to
make progress in the building of character.
12 & 12, p. 65
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Walk In Dry Places
Sensing Rejection
Self-Esteem and Maturity
We laugh when a recovering person tells how he "learned to quit just before he got fired." We sometimes can tell when a rejection is coming, and we take steps.... such as quitting.. To avoid further pain and humiliation.
In the recovery process, there still may be times when we sense a coming rejection. If it does come, we must remember that rejections is part of living. People receive rejection for all sorts of reasons, including wrong ones.
When we do sense any kid of a rejection in the works, our best course is to let it happen, accept it, and put it behind us. If we are living our program, we don't need to feel pain or humiliation, as rejection is simply part of normal human experience.
I'll try today to be as accepting as possible in everything I do. If others choose to reject me, I will also accept this without resentment or self-reproach.
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Keep It Simple
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.---Laurence Couglin
"Do I talk to much?" Most of us wonder this sometimes. There are some ways to find out.
Asked yourself these questions: "How much do I know about people in my life?"
"What do they think and feel?" "Do I listen to them?" "Do I often feel that I say too much?"
Then ask a few trusted friends these questions: "Do you think I talk to much?" "How well do you think I listen to you?"
Silence help us listen---to ourselves, to others, and to our Higher Power.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me enjoy the silent moments in my day.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll think before I speak. what do I really want to say.
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Each Day a New Beginning
For this is wisdom; to live, To take what fate, or the Gods, may give. --Laurence Hope
We can't control the events of our lives, but we do have mastery over our attitudes. The chances will be many, today, to react negatively or positively to circumstances we find ourselves in. We can consider that each circumstance has something special in it for us.
Positive expectations regarding the planned as well as spontaneous activities of the day will influence the activity's flow, our involvement with it, and our interactions with the other people involved. A positive attitude seems to breed positive experiences. In other words, we attract into our lives that which we expect. How often do we get up angry, feeling behind when the day has only begun, short-tempered with our children, "ready" for a tough one at work? And we generally find it.
The Serenity Prayer offers us all the knowledge, all the wisdom we'll ever need. We can accept what has to be, change what we can, and not get confused between the two. We can inventory our attitude. Are we taking charge of it? Our attitude is something we can change.
I won't get trapped today by a negative attitude. I will accept the challenge of turning my day around.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Your prospect may belong to a religious denomination. His religious education and training may be far superior to yours. In that case he is going to wonder how you can add anything to what he already knows. But he well be curious to learn why his own convictions have not worked and why yours seem to work so well. He may be an example of the truth that faith alone is insufficient. To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action. Let him see that you are not there to instruct him in religion. Admit that he probably knows more about it than you do, but call to his attention the fact that however deep his faith and knowledge, he could not have applied it or he would not drink, Perhaps your story will help him see where he has failed to practice the very precepts he knows so well. We represent no particular faith or denomination. We are dealing only with general principles common to most denominations.
pp. 93-94
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
Doctors have been notoriously unsuccessful in helping alcoholics. They have contributed fantastic amounts of time and work to our problem, but they weren't able, it seems, to arrest either your alcoholism or mine.
p. 308
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Yet many of us still hung back. We said, "Why can't 'God as we understand Him' tell us where we are astray? If the Creator gave us our lives in the first place, then He must know in every detail where we have since gone wrong. Why don't we make our admissions to Him directly? Why do we need to bring anyone else into this?"
p. 59
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The problem is never how to get new, innovative thoughts into your
mind, but how to get old ones out.
--Dee Hock
"One faces the future with one's past."
--Pearl S. Buck
This day is not a rehearsal. It is real. What you choose to do with it
will have lasting consequences for you and for those around you. It is
an awesome responsibility and a tremendous opportunity. Give it the
best that you have.
--Ralph Marston
As you teach, you learn.
--Jewish Proverb
At the beginning of your day, spend a few minutes in silence to
commune with God. At the end of your day, do the same. And in the
course of your day, join with others. Pray for those in your life and
allow them the honor of praying for you. The energy you hold in
prayer is real, and over time, will take form.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Notice the acts of kindness other people do rather than their
wrongdoing. This is how the loving presence views you. We are all
good, decent, loving souls who occasionally get lost. When you can
focus on the good in another and hold that in your mind, you are acting
from your higher self. This can help dissipate fear and anger.
--Wayne Dyer
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
WEALTH
"The only question with wealth
is what you do with it."
--John D. Rockefeller, Jr.
Prosperity, if it is truly to be appreciated, needs to be shared.
Wealth only makes sense when it is put to use for the benefit of the
many. To horde treasure is to miss the value of that treasure. Money
makes the world go around but it can only produce joy and excitement
when it is spent or put to work.
This is also true for those who have a "wealth" of ideas or talents --
they need to be expressed, shared and valued by others to be of any
real benefit. A writer needs to write, a musician needs to play, a
painter demands a canvas -- and the world needs to appreciate.
God is at work in His world and He requires recognition.
Let me find You in the talents that You have shared with me.
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A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones.
Proverbs 15:30
"And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength
is made perfect in weakness."
2 Corinthians 12:9
Then I said, `Here I am--it is written about me in the scroll-- I have
come to do your will, O God.'"
Hebrews 10:7
"O God, why have you abandoned me? I sit and wait for you and you
do not come. I watch everyone who passes, but it is not you. I sit by
myself on the side of life and cry to you, but you do not come. I
stand and look from the window, but you are nowhere in sight. I need
you, O God, but you have left me all alone. I try to talk myself into
believing that you're on the way, perhaps tomorrow, or the next
day...but you do not appear. How can I walk in this pain all alone?
How can I stand knee-deep in suffering without you? Where are you,
O God of my life? Where are you when I'm in such danger? Will you
let me slip away simply because you didn't get here on time? O God of
mercy, do not abandon me. Show me your face at my window and
wipe the tears from my life. Please come to me. Please take care of
me. I will shout your name from the rooftops! I will dance your praise
among the stars. I will tell the world that you would never abandon
me."
Psalm 15
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Daily Inspiration
You will be happier if you spend less time insisting that everything be your way. Lord, help me remain objective and open to new ideas when they are presented, but at the same time give me the courage to not compromise my beliefs and values.
How easy it is to blame God for circumstances that don't go as we want. Lord, grant me wisdom and understanding to know that You are Love and, as a loving God, You only want the best for me.
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NA Just For Today
Surrendering Self-Will
"We want and demand that things always go our way. We should know from our past experience that our way of doing things did not work."
Basic Text, p.78
All of us have ideas, plans, goals for our lives. There's nothing in the NA program that says we shouldn't think for ourselves, take initiative, and put responsible plans into action. It's when our lives are driven by self-will that we run into problems.
When we are living willfully, we go beyond thinking for ourselves - we think only of ourselves. We forget that we are but a part of the world and that whatever personal strength we have is drawn from a Higher Power. We might even go so far as to imagine that other people exist solely to do our bidding. Quickly, we find ourselves at odds with everyone and everything around us.
At this point, we have two choices. We can continue in our slavery to self-will, making unreasonable demands and becoming frustrated because the planet doesn't spin our way. Or we can surrender, relax, seek knowledge of God's will and the power to carry that out, and find our way back to a condition of peace with the world. Thinking, taking initiative, making responsible plans-there's nothing wrong with these things, so long as they serve God's will, not merely our own.
Just for today: I will plan to do God's will, not mine. If I find myself at odds with everything around me, I will surrender self-will.
pg. 213
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
There is no reality except the one contained within us. --Herman Hesse
Claude Gellee painted lovely pictures of the English countryside. Europeans loved his landscapes, with their blue hues and mild distortions. But when the people went for the carriage rides in the country, they were disappointed because it didn't look the way Gellee had painted it. Then someone discovered that if you held blue glass up to your eyes and looked through it, the trees and hills and sky looked just like a Gellee painting! Soon everyone was looking through "Claude glasses" when they traveled.
We often let others do our seeing for us. We get lazy and rely on the images of television and movies, instead of really seeing with our own eyes. Our world becomes distorted and we lose sight of the natural beauty that surrounds us.
Each of us carries reality inside ourselves, and as we grow stronger within, we discover that we can see clearest when we trust our own eyes. There is a glorious world, full and rich, just waiting for us to glimpse it.
Will I see the world through my own eyes today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
He that to what he sees, adds observation, and to what he reads, reflection, is in the right road to knowledge. --Caleb Colton
We are not just feathers blown on the winds of a powerless life. We bring ourselves to our experiences. The dynamics of learning include, first, what happens - what we see or read or hear - and, second, what we make of it. So in our observations and reflections we consider what an event means to us.
As men in a spiritual program, we need some time to think and reflect. That is, we need time away from the phone, away from interruptions and work, where we can let ourselves learn and grow from our experiences. Some men get that by leaving the radio off while driving alone, others get it on the bus, others light a candle in a quiet room at home and meditate. In this way we are conscious and aware of what is happening in our lives and we bring our wisdom to it. Through time we deepen and grow stronger as we grow older rather than only accumulating more experiences.
Today, I will reflect on the meaning of my experiences and bring my wisdom to them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
For this is wisdom; to live, To take what fate, or the Gods, may give. --Laurence Hope
We can't control the events of our lives, but we do have mastery over our attitudes. The chances will be many, today, to react negatively or positively to circumstances we find ourselves in. We can consider that each circumstance has something special in it for us.
Positive expectations regarding the planned as well as spontaneous activities of the day will influence the activity's flow, our involvement with it, and our interactions with the other people involved. A positive attitude seems to breed positive experiences. In other words, we attract into our lives that which we expect. How often do we get up angry, feeling behind when the day has only begun, short-tempered with our children, "ready" for a tough one at work? And we generally find it.
The Serenity Prayer offers us all the knowledge, all the wisdom we'll ever need. We can accept what has to be, change what we can, and not get confused between the two. We can inventory our attitude. Are we taking charge of it? Our attitude is something we can change.
I won't get trapped today by a negative attitude. I will accept the challenge of turning my day around.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Making It Happen
Stop trying so hard to make it happen.
Stop doing so much, if doing so much is wearing you out or not achieving the desired results. Stop thinking so much and so hard about it. Stop worrying so about it. Stop trying to force, to manipulate, to coerce, or to make it happen.
Making things happen is controlling. We can take positive action to help things happen. We can do our part. But many of us do much more than our part. We overstep the boundaries from caring and doing our part into controlling, caretaking, and coercing.
Controlling is self-defeating. It doesn't work. By overextending ourselves to make something happen, we may actually be stopping it from happening.
Do your part in relaxed, peaceful harmony. Then let it go. Just let it go. Force yourself to let it go, if necessary. "Act as if." Put as much energy into letting go as you have into trying to control. You'll get much better results.
It may not happen. It may not happen the way we wanted it to and hoped it would. But our controlling wouldn't have made it happen either.
Learn to let things happen because that's what they'll do anyway. And while we're waiting to see what happens, we'll be happier and so will those around us.
Today, I will stop forcing things to happen. Instead, I will allow things to happen naturally. If I catch myself trying to force events or control people, I will stop and figure out a way to detach.
Today I will put aside all negative and destructive thoughts so that I can come from the place of love. Today I will let go of all blame and anger and resentments so that my heart and my mind will be open and free to feel love and give love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Make a Fresh Start
Sometimes we need to start over– in work, in love, in our place of residence, in creating our lives. Sometimes we have to start over again when we don’t want to, didn’t plan on it, and don’t think it’s fair.
We may end a relationship, move, start a new job, start a new career, or begin an entirely different part of our lives, a part so different we don’t recognize it as being connected to the earlier ones. It’s new. We’re new. Life is new. We’re starting over again.
Sometimes it feels like we’re starting from scratch. While we may feel a sense of excitement about this new beginning, we may also harbor a sense of dread. Not again. Not one more time. I can’t. I don’t want to. That reaction is understandable. We become tired, frightened. We feel uncertain.
Honor all your feelings, all your emotions. Remember all your lessons.Clear the way to the heart. Then make a decision.
It’s time for a fresh start.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Fill up your life
I merely took the energy it takes to pout and wrote some blues.
–Duke Ellington
One of the good things about the blues is their power to make me feel better. No matter how bad it gets in my little world, I can be pretty sure that B.B. King, John Lee Hooker, or Stevie Ray Vaughn has seen worse. Sometimes, it just feels good to vocalize all those bad feelings.
Bad things happen in life. Sometimes they are small annoyances; sometimes they are the major grief mongers. What matters is not what happens to us, but how we react to it. He left you. That is a fact. Now, after you get done with the quart of Breyers’ rocky road that you are drowning your sorrows in, what are you going to do about it? You can sit around and complain to your friends about how unfair life is, or you can get up, put the empty bowl in the dishwasher, and go fill up your life.
Feelings are one of the blessings of being human. All of them. Sometimes we feel good; sometimes we feel bad. Take some time. Take some energy and be upset. Be aware of the feeling of being upset. But then get up, go out, and make positive use of your life.
God, help me put to positive use all of the feelings in my life.
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In God’s Care
The worst moment for the atheist is when he is really thankful and has nobody to thank.
~~Dante Gabriel Rossetti
We can look back on our old life and be thankful for what we are like now. Although it is useless to dwell on the past, it is sometimes helpful to cast a backward glance. It sharpens our gratitude. The blessings we experience today are in such stark contrast to the misery we use to endure.
We examine the serendipity – all the good things that are happening to us – and we know not to take credit ourselves. We express gratitude to God because we know the good things are not accidental.
I pray that I remain grateful for God’s help.
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Day By Day
Baby-sitting
If someone truly wants our help to stop using mood-altering chemicals, we have a responsibility to do all we can. But demanding that someone accept our help or baby-sitting someone who continues to use probably does more harm than good.
Deep down, we know when someone is sincerely seeking help. While it is our job to carry the message, we must avoid trying to fix someone who is not yet ready to quit. It works better if we tell them we’re happy to talk anytime they want to call.
Am I learning the boundary between helping and fixing?
Higher Power, help me help others according to their needs,
in the best way I can.
I will concentrate on helping myself today by…
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Food for Thought
Food: Servant or Master?
Food used to be our master. The mental obsession with food and the craving for more controlled our life. As we recover, we begin to see just how much we were in slavery to food and our appetite. We know that no matter how long we abstain and recover from our disease, we will always be powerless over food. The idea that we will one day be able to eat spontaneously is the most dangerous delusion we can entertain.
By abstaining from compulsive overeating every day of our life, we make food our servant rather than our master. We eat what we need to nourish our body, but we do not permit eating for comfort, excitement, or any other emotional reason. Whatever it takes to remain abstinent is what we are willing to do each day.
Never forgetting that we are always one mouthful away from a binge ensures that food will remain our servant.
Today and every day, may I serve You instead of food.
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Guided Meditation
Accessing the World Within by Madisyn Taylor
Guided meditation is a wonderful way to start a meditation practice and can be deeply relaxing.
A guided meditation uses the sound of a person’s voice to direct you through an inner process of relaxing your body and shifting your mind’s focus. The voice may be a person in the room with you or a recording—even something downloaded from the internet—and it is generally spoken in soothing, soft tones. You may be guided to focus on aspects of your physical body, such as on your breathing, relaxing your muscles one-by-one, or on an area in need of healing. Sometimes it might involve visualizing a journey through the beauty of the natural world. Other times, you may be led to envision yourself working with light or energy, accomplishing your goals, or repeating positive thoughts in your head. Your guide may walk you through relaxation or motivation to help you change a habit, access untapped potential, or perhaps merely to find the silence within you.
Whether you are familiar with meditation or you are a beginner, being guided gives you the opportunity to benefit from the insight of others. There are numerous meditation and visualization techniques based in various spiritual philosophies and psychological applications. You may want to try several techniques to see what appeals to you the most, or just to gain a fresh perspective.
Guided meditation allows you to learn from others in a way that is similar to ones used by ancients the world over. Once learned, meditation is a tool that will always be available to you. Like having a tour guide while traveling in a foreign country, a guided meditation takes you on an inner journey. But this tour allows you to see and experience your own inner world, a place that truly only exists within you. The scenes created in your mind’s eye can be revisited at anytime, without a guide, because once you have seen the fascinating landscape of your own inner terrain, there will always be more to explore. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Today I’ll try to settle for less than I wish were possible, and be willing to not only accept it but to appreciate it. Today, I’ll not expect too much of anyone — especially myself. I’ll try to remember that contentment comes from gratefully accepting the good that comes to us, and not from being furious at life because it’s not “better.” Do I realize the difference between resignation and realistic acceptance?
Today I Pray
May I not set my sights unrealistically high, expect too much. May I look backwards long enough to see that my self-set, impossible goals were the trappings of my addiction; too often I ended up halfway there, confronted by my own failure. Those “foiled-again,” “I’ve-failed-again” feelings became monumental excuses to give in to my compulsion, which blanketed my miseries. May I avoid that sick old pattern. May I be realistic.
Today I Will Remember
Good is good enough.
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One More Day
A friend is clearer than the light of heaven, for it would be better for us that the sun were extinguished than that we should be without friends.
– St. John Chrysostom
Friendship is our greatest achievement and reward. Our friends are people to care about, celebrate with, and count on. Even condition, friends are there fo reach other. Within the closest friendships we find the best of each other at all times.
Friendships enrich our lives. It is no accident that we become close and maintain our contact. Our paths crossed for reasons, and we are forever a part of each other’s life. We really listen. We open up. We offer help and hope. We share each other’s pain and enhance each other’s growth. We appreciate our friend’s unique qualities. We let each other know who we really are.
I bring myself honestly to my friendships.
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One Day At A Time
CHOICE
“Destiny is not a matter of chance;
it is a matter of choice.
It is not a thing to be waited for;
it is a thing to be achieved.”
William Jennings Bryan
I have often wished that my life were easier. I have resented the fact that others seemed to have been given a free ride, whereas I have had to walk the distance. I often prayed that on waking one morning, I would find that the shadow I cast the day before had been vastly reduced overnight.
Wallowing in self-pity has taken me nowhere. It has wasted time that I could have spent reaching my recovery. I could choose to waste my days wishing for something that I obviously don’t have -- and will never have -- unless I actively do the legwork to obtain it. I could sit back and expect the world to come to my door, but I would find that it passes me by.
Often I find myself slipping down the emotional slide into the depths of depression. In those dark times, walking through life is as easy as walking waist-deep through wet tar. It’s a place where the sun never shines, thus its warm rays don’t land on my skin.
Recovery comes only when I make the choice and do the work needed to attain it.
One day at a time ...
I choose to use the wisdom, strength and shelter of God; my Higher Power. I choose to follow the Twelve Steps and use the tools provided in the recovery program. I choose to be guided by the Big Book. In essence ... I choose life
~ Sue G
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I. Final responsibility and ultimate authority for A.A. world services should always reside in the collective conscience of our whole Fellowship.
II. The General Service Conference of A.A. has become, for nearly every practical purpose, the active voice and the effective conscience of our Society in its world affairs.
III. To insure effective leadership, we should endow each element of A.A. - the Conference, the General Service Board and its service corporations, staffs, committees, and executives - with a traditional 'Right of Decision.' - Pg. 574 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - VII - The Twelve Concepts (Short Form)
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Now we must choose and use a sponsor. Just one. More than one sponsor gives us more than one answer and allows us to play games with the program. We ask for guidance in choosing a sponsor, then we use them.
Higher Power, as I understand You, please guide me to the sponsor that will give me the answers I need.
My Work
I am whole and in tact and as such I have a positive contribution to make to this world. My work needs me. Whatever my gifts are, I will share them. I will not hold back, telling myself I am not ready, not smart enough, not good enough. Today is the day. This is as good a place to begin as any. I will dig deep into myself and find beauty and wisdom. I will produce good works and I will share those openly with others. As I expand my own consciousness, it becomes my responsibility to share what I learn with the collective. I am available to find my mission. I will give myself the gift of feeling purposeful, today.
I will share my gifts
- Tian Dayton PhD
You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land, there is no other life but this.
Henry David Thoreau
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'Each place along the way is somewhere you had to be to be here.' ~Wayne Dyer
I cannot get ahead until I learn to be here.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Reality can be as painful to accept as it was to escape.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will put aside all negative and destructive thoughts so that I can come from the place of love. Today I will let go of all blame and anger and resentments so that my heart and my mind will be open and free to feel love and give love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I was so grateful I couldn't stop crying, because I thought about all the friends of mine that I've known through the years who couldn't make it. Who missed it all. And I thought 'No matter what happens I've got no quarrel. Not with God, not with life, not with anything. And I stood there - with cancer - feeling like one of the most fortunate women on earth. - Gayle W.
bluidkiti
07-23-2015, 09:09 AM
July 24
Daily Reflections
HELPING OTHERS
"Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant
thought of others and how we may help meet their needs.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 20
Self-centeredness was my problem. All my life people had been doing
things for me and I not only expected it, but I was ungrateful and
resentful they didn't do more. Why should I help others, when they
were supposed to help me? If others had troubles, didn't they deserve
them? I was filled with self-pity, anger and resentment. Then I
learned that by helping others, with no thought of return, I could
overcome this obsession with selfishness, and if I understood humility,
I would know peace and serenity. No longer do I need to drink.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
A.A. is like a dike, holding back the ocean of liquor. If we take one
glass of liquor, it is like making a small hole in the dike and once such a
hole has been made, the whole ocean of alcohol may rush in upon us.
By practicing the A.A. principles we keep the dike strong and in
repair. We spot any weakness or crack in that dike and make the
necessary repairs before any damage is done. Outside the dike is the
whole ocean of alcohol, waiting to engulf us again in despair. Am I
keeping the dike strong?
Meditation For The Day
Keep as close as you can to the Higher Power. Try to think, act, live
as though you were always in God's presence. Keeping close to a
Power greater than yourself is the solution to most of the earth's
problems. Try to practice the presence of God in the things you think
and do. That is the secret of personal power. It is the thing that
influences the lives of others for good. Abide in the Lord and rejoice in
His love. Keep close to the Divine Spirit in the universe. Keep God
close behind your thoughts.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may keep close to the Mind of God. I pray that I may live
with Him in my heart and mind.
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As Bill Sees It
Virtue and Self-Deception, p. 205
I used to take comfort from an exaggerated belief in my own honesty.
My New England kinfolk had taught me the sanctity of all business
commitments and contracts, saying, "A man's word is his bond." After
this rigorous conditioning, business honesty always came easy; I never
flim-flammed anyone.
However, this small fragment of readily won virtue did produce some
interesting liabilities. I never failed to whip up a fine contempt for
those of my fellow Wall Streeters who were prone to shortchange
their customers. This was arrogant enough, but the ensuring
self-deception proved even worse.
My prized business honesty was presently converted into a
comfortable cloak under which I could hide the many serious flaws
that beset other departments of my life. Being certain of this one
virtue, it was easy to conclude that I had them all. For years on end,
this prevented me from taking a good look at myself.
Grapevine, August 1961
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Walk In Dry Places
Overcoming A Bad Disposition
Temperament
People with bad dispositions, like people with drinking problems, do not recognize how difficult they are. They accept their bad disposition as normal. Some people even declare proudly that they're in a bad mood until they've been awake several hours or had three cups of coffee.
We do not have to put up with a BAD DISPOSITION. If we find ourselves touchy or grumpy at times, we should immediately release this to our Higher Power. There is a better pattern of thought and feeling to replace anything that comes across to others as a bad disposition.
It's surprising to learn that we don't have to live with a bad disposition. What's even more surprising is that we'll also be happier and more relaxed without it.
A bad disposition, we learn, is just so much unnecessary baggage we don't have to carry.
I'll be relaxed and friendly at all times today. I have neither a need nor an excuse for a bad disposition.
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Keep It Simple
The work of adult life is not easy.---Gail Sheehy
We used to look for a easier, softer way. We tried to take care of ourselves by staying clear of hard task. The result? We haven't known what the work of adult life is.
The work of adult life is this: to become spiritually centered. And to do this, we work at getting rid of our self-will. There will be many great rewards for doing this. We will wake up spiritually. We will connect with those we love. The result? We will receive self-love to replace self-will. Our work will not be easy, but it will be rewarding.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to give all to my recovery program. Then help me to be open to the rewards this will bring.
Action for the Day: I will list the hard parts of my program. Then I'll talk about them with my sponsor, friends, family, and Higher Power.
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Each Day a New Beginning
... The idea has gained currency that women have often been handicapped not only by a fear of failure--not unknown to men either, but by a fear of success as well. --Sonya Rudikoff
It was our practice, before coming to this program, to eat, drink, and smoke our fears away. What we came to realize, profoundly, was that the fears couldn't be escaped even while high. This program is helping us to understand that fears are human, normal and survivable when we let God and our friends in the program lend a helping hand.
Drugs and alcohol distorted our perceptions. Our fears, whether large or small, were distorted. And we still distort those fears, on occasion, because we move away from the spiritual reality of our lives. Remember, we are confronted with no situation too big to handle, no experience for which we are unprepared, if we but turn to that greater power that the program offers us.
We cannot fail in whatever we try today. The outcome of any task attempted is just as it should be. And however we succeed today, we will be shown the steps, at the right time, to make use of that success.
I shall not fear failure or success. I am not alone in experiencing either; both are stepping-stones on my life's journey.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Outline the program of action, explaining how you made a self-appraisal, how you straightened out your past and why you are now endeavoring to be helpful to him. It is important for him to realize that your attempt to pass this on to him plays a vital part in your recovery. Actually, he may be helping you more than you are helping him. Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties. Suggest how important it is that he place the welfare of other people ahead of his own. Make it clear that he is not under pressure, that he needn’t see you again if he doesn’t want to. You should not be offended if he wants to call it off, for he has helped you more than you have helped him. If your talk has been sane, quiet and full of human understanding, you have perhaps made a friend. Maybe you have disturbed him about the question of alcoholism. This is all to the good. The more hopeless he feels, the better. he will be more likely to follow your suggestions.
p. 94
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
And the clergy have tried hard to help us, but we haven't been helped. And the psychiatrist has had thousands of couches and has out you and me on them many, many times, but he hasn't helped us very much, though he has tried hard, and we owe the clergy and the doctor and the psychiatrist a deep debt of gratitude, but they haven't helped our alcoholism, except in a few rare instances. But---Alcoholics Anonymous has helped.
p. 308
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
At this stage, the difficulties of trying to deal rightly with God by ourselves are twofold. Though we may at first be startled to realize that God knows all about us, we are apt to get used to that quite quickly. Somehow, being alone with God doesn't seem as embarrassing as facing up to another person. Until we actually sit down and talk aloud about what we have so long hidden, our willingness to clean house is still largely theoretical. When we are honest with another person, it confirms that we have been honest with ourselves and with God.
pp. 59-60
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"Our ability to identify a teacher and to learn is directly related to
how open-minded we are and the attitude with which we approach
everyone and everything that comes our way."
--Bonnie Friedman
"When God measures a man, he puts the tape around the heart
instead of the head."
--anonymous
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
--Eleanor Roosevelt
"The remarkable thing we have is a choice every day regarding the
attitude we will embrace for that day. "
--Charles Swindoll
"Just when I found out the meaning of life, they changed it!"
--George Carlin
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
--Laurence Couglin
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LONELINESS
"This great misfortune -- to be
incapable of solitude."
--Jean de la Bruyere
Today I am able to live with my loneliness. I know the difference
between being "alone" and being "lonely" -- and even in sobriety I
experience loneliness. But today I can live with it.
When I was drinking, I had an overwhelming feeling of being lost and
isolated; today it is tolerable. I can live with it. It is part of being
"imperfect". I am not God.
The reality of spirituality demands that I do not escape into a fantasy
that denies my feelings of loneliness. It is part of my journey towards
God. I will never appreciate perfect happiness until I rest in God. This
I accept. In sobriety I have many days of happiness and moments of
joy --- but I am, at times, lonely -- with feelings of being lost. Today I
can accept this -- and talk about it.
I accept that part of me will be forever lost until I rest in God.
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Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong.
1 Corinthians 16:13
"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just
as in Christ God forgave you."
Ephesians 4:32
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat
or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more
important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look
at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more
valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to
his life?"
Matthew 6:25
For He delivered us from the domain of darkness, and transferred
us to the kingdom of His beloved Son.
Colossians 1:13
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Daily Inspiration
The things in life that mean the most have no price tag. Lord, thank you for the moments that I am able to spend with my family and friends.
If your family is a mess, you are not a success. Lord, bless me with the wisdom and strength to bring unity and peace to my family.
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NA Just For Today
The Masks Have To Go
"... we covered low self-esteem by hiding behind phony images that we hoped would fool people. The masks have to go"
Basic Text, p.32
Over-sensitivity, insecurity, and lack of identity are often associated with active addiction. Many of us carry these with us into recovery; our fears of inadequacy, rejection, and lack of direction do not disappear overnight. Many of us have images, false personalities we have constructed either to protect ourselves or please others. Some of us use masks because we're not sure who we really are. Sometimes we think that these images, built to protect us while using, might also protect us in recovery.
We use false fronts to hide our true personality, to disguise our lack of self-esteem. These masks hide us from others and also from our own true selves. By living a lie, we are saying that we cannot live with the truth about ourselves. The more we hide our real selves, the more we damage our self-esteem.
One of the miracles of recovery is the recognition of ourselves, complete with assets and liabilities. Self esteem begins with this recognition. Despite our fear of becoming vulnerable, we need to be willing to let go of our disguises. We need to be free of our masks and free to trust ourselves.
Just for today: I will let go of my masks and allow my self esteem to grow.
pg. 214
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I had crossed the line. I was free: but there was no one to welcome me to the land of freedom. I was a stranger in a strange land. --Harriet Tubman
Harriet Tubman was a Black woman who devoted her life to helping slaves escapes their bondage. In her youth, she had been hit on the head so she suffered dizzy spells for the rest of her life. In spite of this, and at great risk to her own life, she guided many slaves on the Underground Railroad to freedom.
Freedom from slavery is different today but just as necessary. It may mean freedom from being a slave to what others think of us, freedom from eating more than is healthy for us, freedom from jealousy, and freedom from trying to force others to do what we want them to do.
We are free to be the very best persons we can be. Our own freedom can be even more fulfilling when we welcome others enthusiastically into that land of freedom by allowing them the room to be themselves without fear of judgment. In this way, by freeing ourselves, we free one another.
How can I free myself today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Many things are lost for want of asking. --English proverb
It's a principle of this program that we grow, in part, by learning to ask for what we need. Perhaps today we are struggling with a problem that could be eased if we talked to another man in the program. We could call him on the phone and just ask him if he has a few minutes to talk. Maybe we're wondering about a physical pain. Maybe we feel strange about something we said and would like to ask someone's opinion.
Mistaken notions about masculinity get in the way of recovery when we refuse to ask for help. We think we should know the answers and be self-sufficient. Maybe we feel stupid if we have to ask. Those notions drop by the wayside as we get healthier and learn the rewards of connecting with others to satisfy our mutual needs. No longer does false pride have to keep us isolated and struggling alone.
Today, I will notice what I need and practice asking for help.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
... The idea has gained currency that women have often been handicapped not only by a fear of failure--not unknown to men either, but by a fear of success as well. --Sonya Rudikoff
It was our practice, before coming to this program, to eat, drink, and smoke our fears away. What we came to realize, profoundly, was that the fears couldn't be escaped even while high. This program is helping us to understand that fears are human, normal and survivable when we let God and our friends in the program lend a helping hand.
Drugs and alcohol distorted our perceptions. Our fears, whether large or small, were distorted. And we still distort those fears, on occasion, because we move away from the spiritual reality of our lives. Remember, we are confronted with no situation too big to handle, no experience for which we are unprepared, if we but turn to that greater power that the program offers us.
We cannot fail in whatever we try today. The outcome of any task attempted is just as it should be. And however we succeed today, we will be shown the steps, at the right time, to make use of that success.
I shall not fear failure or success. I am not alone in experiencing either; both are stepping-stones on my life's journey.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Denial
Denial is a powerful tool. Never underestimate its ability to cloud your vision.
Be aware that, for many reasons, we have become experts at using this tool to make reality more tolerable. We have learned well how to stop the pain caused by reality - not by changing our circumstances, but by pretending our circumstances are something other than what they are.
Do not be too hard on yourself. While one part of you was busy creating a fantasy reality, the other part went to work on accepting the truth.
Now, it is time to find courage. Face the truth. Let it sink gently in.
When we can do that, we will be moved forward.
God, give me the courage and strength to see clearly.
Today I am going to spend more time looking for all the positive things about myself. Today I recognize myself and acknowledge myself as a terrific human being. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Joy Is the Way
The woman was in her fifties, maybe sixties. She had retired from the big city and was now working as a waitress in Mary’s Restaurant, a small cafe in a small Montana town. She looked as if she lived alone. She looked as if she had been through her share of disappointments, joys, and awakenings. She brought me a plate of bacon and eggs, set them down, and gave me a radiant smile. “It’s a beautiful day,” she said.
“Yes it is,” I said. I looked at her. “Are you happy to be here?”
She thought for a moment, then replied. “Yes,” she said with joy in her voice. “Yes, I am.”
Joy is the way. Joy in the morning. Joy throughout the day. Joy at twilight. Joy in our dreams, waking and sleeping. For so long we believed that our joy depended on specific outward circumstances, on a particular situation being a certain way, or on the presence or behavior of a particular person. While getting what we want and being with those we love can add to our joy, we have learned another kind of joy, a deeper kind of joy. A joy that abides and carries us through.
Joy doesn’t come from outside, although the energies of the universe and universal love can add to our joy and fill our wellspring. Joy comes from doing the Divine will each moment. Joy comes from living in harmony with ourselves each moment of each day. Joy is a choice that comes from accepting and living fully each moment of our lives, knowing that each day and each event is important.
Joy comes from trusting each moment. That’s the secret of joy. Receive it now, then pass it on with a smile and a kind word to all who come along your path.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let go of fear
Sometimes, we say we want to go to the next level in our lives– in work, in play, or in love. But it feels like the door is shut. Fear can disguise itself behind many different faces: we want to do it our way; we’re not interested; or it’s just not time. What we’re coming up against isn’t a closed door, it’s the fear we’re repressing and holding inside.
If you’re confused about why you’re not moving forward naturally in some area of your life, take a closer look. See if you’ve got some hidden fears that might be holding you back. If you’re blocked and trying to move forward, remember to feel and release your fear first. Then see if that wasn’t just the key you needed to unlock and open that door.
God, help me see, feel, and release my fears about moving forward in my life.
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In God’s Care
Toleration is the greatest gift of the mind.
~~Helen Keller
How difficult it is still to simply enjoy the gifts of the moment and not obsessively try to control the people and circumstances in our life. Sometimes we can persuade others to go along with our wishes. Perhaps we can positively influence a tense situation by our involvement in the solution. But we can’t ultimately control anyone or anything, only the choices we make about ourselves. We can decide the attitude we will cultivate; we can decide the behavior we will exhibit; we can decide to let God participate in our life.
Our willingness to follow God’s will assures us greater peace. Work, relationships, day-to-day struggles become less stressful when we’ve let God in. By trusting guidance from a friend, reading a meditation, or perhaps just by being still, we’ll discover the peace of letting go and be enriched by the serenity that follows.
I will let others live the way they choose. Today I will live the way that pleases me – and God.
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Day By Day
Sharing a common goal
Since we’re going the same way, let’s go together. We may have some differences, but let’s work them out and respect each other’s opinions. Since our goal is the same, you help me and I’ll help you.
But let’s never withhold love as a weapon against one another. Since we are held together by a critical common solution, let’s not cause one another any suffering.
Am I learning to emphasize our common purpose?
Higher Power, help me see that what we share in the fellowship is more important than what separates us.
Today I will strengthen our common cause by…
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Food for Thought
Living Is a Privilege
When we were overeating, how often did we drag ourselves out of bed wondering how we were going to make it through the day? Many of us felt that life was treating us unfairly, and we blamed those around us for our misery. We may have thought we believed in a Power greater than ourselves, but we were unable to apply the belief so that it made a difference in the way we were living. Trying to manage our own life pushed us further and further into despair.
The OA program shows us how to commit our will and our life to the management of God. We stop trying to “go it alone,” and we listen for His direction. By the grace of our Higher Power, we abstain from compulsive overeating one day at a time, and we walk a new way of humility and obedience.
Little by little, we recover in mind and body, and we no longer feel crushed by an uncaring fate. We accept each day as a gift from the hand of God, and we live it to the best of our ability.
Thank You for the privilege of living and abstaining today.
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Cleansing Your Power Center
Trusting Your Gut by Madisyn Taylor
Gut feelings earn their name from the place in the body where they make themselves known. A pang in your gut when you may be doing the wrong thing, or a vibrant zing when your body approves, can guide you reliably at times when logic fails. Sometimes, when logic prevails, we ignore our gut and live to regret it, understanding later that a rational approach is only one way of determining what is going on in a situation and how we should react.
Our gut resides in the neighborhood of our solar plexus and the third chakra just above your belly button. When it is functioning well, we can trust its guidance and adjust our actions accordingly. Many of us have a tendency to hold in this area of our bodies. We may take shallow breaths that never reach this vital nexus that is the source of our empowerment. It is in this place that we find the courage to act, to reach out into the world and create change. When our power center is out of balance, we are timid and out of sync, wishing we had said something we were only able to phrase later when we were alone; wishing we had acted on an opportunity we didn’t see until it was past.
In order to utilize your power center, you may want to focus your attention on it more regularly and make time to care for it. You can begin right now by taking a deep breath into your belly. On the exhale, pull your navel in toward your spine so as to empty out completely before taking another deep breath into your belly. When you empty completely, you release stagnant energy and create more space to be filled with fresh, nourishing breath. The more you practice this simple, cleansing exercise, the more clear and communicative your gut feelings will be and the more comfortable you will feel acting on them. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
How, exactly, can a p4erson turn his own will and his own life over to the care of a Power greater than himself? All that’s needed is a beginning, no matter how small. The minute we put the key of willingness in the lock, the latch springs open. Then the door itself starts to open, perhaps even so slightly; in time we find that we can always open it wider. Self-will may slam the door shut again, and it often does. But the door can always be reopened, time and time again if necessary, so long as we use our key of willingness. Have I reaffirmed my decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God as I understand Him?
Today I Pray
May I reaffirm my decision to turn my will and my life over to a Higher Power. May my faith be staunch enough to keep me knowing that there is, indeed, a power greater than I am. May I avail myself of that Power simply by being willing to “walk humbly with my Lord.”
Today I Will Remember
Self-will minus self equals will.
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One More Day
Keep your fears to yourself but share your courage with others.
– Robert Louis Stevenson
Each of us harbors secret fears. “how will I manage?” “Can I make it through today?” “Will my family still love me if my behavior has been inappropriate?”
We learn, rather early in the game, that a defeatist attitude drives our friends away after a period of time. Therefore, it’s often up to us to deal with our own fears. We do our best to ease ourselves through each crisis — and at times we will need additional help — but by and large we can do it. It isn’t so much that we’re overly independent or angry. It’s that we need to help our loved ones learn how to cope with our illness, so we keep our fears from becoming irrational as best we can. And that often passes for courage.
I will put my fears into proper perspective because this helps me — and my loved ones.
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One Day At A Time
IDENTITY
“Resolve to be thyself:
And know that he who finds himself loses his misery.”
Matthew Arnold
Life before recovery was a theatrical production in which I played all parts to all audiences. I gave a performance which aimed to satisfy everyone's requirements but my own. I proffered whatever I felt others wanted, giving no thought to my own needs. Some may say that's a worthy attitude, but it was influenced by a desire to be accepted -- not for who I am -- but for whom I thought everyone wanted me to be. I used my performance to control situations and to avoid any nasty surprises. I furnished more than I could afford, often lavishing what wasn't mine to give. Frequently I didn't feel that I had gained the acceptance I so fervently sought, and this yielded feelings of incompetence.
To be everything to all people took time and sapped considerable quantities of energy physically, spiritually and emotionally. Often I found I couldn't keep up with this self-inflicted regimen of people-pleasing. I began to resent the performance and gained no satisfaction from the results.
Through my recovery I realized that I had never been happy with the results of my role-playing. It had been a compulsion to seek the approval from others because I couldn't grant myself the authorization to be me. The only person I can be is me. The only person I have a right to be is me.
One day at a time ...
I give myself permission to be who I truly am: ME!
~ Sue G.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
IV. At all responsible levels, we ought to maintain a traditional 'Right of Participation,' allowing a voting representation in reasonable proportion to the responsibility that each must discharge.
V. Throughout our structure, a traditional 'Right of Appeal' ought to prevail, so that minority opinion will be heard and personal grievances receive careful consideration.
VI.The Conference recognizes that the chief initiative and active responsibility in most world service matters should be exercised by the trustee members of the Conference acting as the General Service Board. - Pg. 574 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - VII - The Twelve Concepts (Short Form)
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Our sobriety grows out of an awareness of and response to a spiritual program. Nothing works better for more people. To try other means is probably not in our best interests.
May I accept the spiritual foundation of my recovery.
Forgiving and Moving On
As I work through the blocks in the way of my own serenity I find that I consider forgiveness as a way to release the residue of resentment and pain that live inside me from unresolved issues from the past. As I put more and more energy into my own personal growth, I find that I value my own peace of mind more than holding onto anger and hurt. I find I want to lay the sword down. It becomes too heavy in my hand, the weight of carrying it encumbers my own freedom. Today, the present I will give myself is forgiveness.
I am ready to consider forgiveness
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Resentment is from the Latin, meaning to 'feel again.' Rather than feeling that again, think of how it could have been worse, then be grateful it isn't. Once you get to the grateful part, you can't be resentful.
I cannot be grateful and resentful at the same time; I can't serve two masters.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you marry your past, you must divorce your future.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am going to spend more time looking for all the positive things about myself. Today I recognize myself and acknowledge myself as a terrific human being.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
A relationship to me is what I have to do after we've had sex rather than say: 'You know this was just a sexual thing, I don't want to get involved.' I'd rather drag it out for four or five years. - Charlie C.
bluidkiti
07-24-2015, 07:15 AM
July 25
Daily Reflections
THOSE WHO STILL SUFFER
For us, if we neglect those who are still sick, there is unremitting
danger to our own lives and sanity.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 151
I know the torment of drinking compulsively to quiet my nerves and
my fears. I also know the pain of white-knuckled sobriety. Today, I
do not forget the unknown person who suffers quietly, withdrawn and
hiding in the desperate relief of drinking. I ask my Higher Power to
give me His guidance and the courage to be willing to be His
instrument to carry within me compassion and unselfish actions. Let
the group continue to give me the strength to do with others what I
cannot do alone.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We are living on borrowed time. We are living today because of A.A.
and the grace of God. And what there is left of our lives we owe to
A.A. and to God. We should make the best use we can of our
borrowed time and in some small measure pay back for that part of
our lives which we wasted before we came into A.A. Our lives from
now on are not our own. We hold them in trust for God and A.A. And
we must do all we can to forward the great movement that has given
us a new lease on life. Am I holding my life in trust for A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
You should hold your life in trust for God. Think deeply on what that
means. Is anything too much to expect from such a life? Do you begin
to see how dedicated a life in trust for God can be? In such a life
miracles can happen. If you are faithful, you can believe that God has
many good things in store for you. God can be Lord of your life,
controller of your days, of your present and your future. Try to act as
God guides and leave all results to Him. Do not hold back, but go all
out for God and the better life. Make good your trust.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may hold my life in trust for God. I pray that I may no
longer consider my life as all my own.
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As Bill Sees It
Praying For Others, p. 206
While praying sincerely, we still may fall into temptation. We form
ideas as to what we think God's will is for other people. We say to
ourselves, "This one ought to be cured of his fatal malady" or "That
one ought to be relieved of his emotional pain," and we pray for these
specific things.
Such prayers, of course, are fundamentally good acts, but often they
are based upon a supposition that we know God's will for the person
for whom we pray. This means that side by side with an earnest
prayer there can be a certain amount of presumption and conceit in us.
It is A.A.'s experience that partially in these cases we ought to pray
that God's will, whatever it is, be done for others as well as for
ourselves.
12 & 12, p. 104
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Walk In Dry Places
Dealing with Disagreeable people
Personal relations
At every turn in the road, we=re likely to meet disagreeable people, sometimes unexpectedly. Sometimes, we=re forced to deal with them.
The 12 Step program does not make this entirely painless, but it smooths the process. One thing we=ve learned is not to react with anger and contempt when we meet a disagreeable person, because such feelings on our part will only set off an explosion.
The 12 Step program shows us how to give the ASoft Answer Which Turns away Wrath.
It will not be us, but our Higher Power who does the work. In time, we will respond in this way naturally. This is not cowardice---- it is really another courageous way of dealing with human weaknesses.
I'll be calm and controlled today, no matter who or what comes into my life. My Higher Power supports me in my responses.
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Keep It Simple
If the spirit within us withers (dies), so to will all the world we build around us.---Theodore Roszab
This is what happened during our illness---our spirits were dying. Our relationships were dying. this is because addiction is death.
And recovery is life! The Steps breathe like into us. Our groups breathe life into us. We start to heal because we once again feel hope. We're less afraid of what tomorrow may bring. As our hope grows, others feel it too.
We're starting to slowly rebuild our world. We're building our world on the Twelve Steps and their message of hope.
Prayer for the Day: I give myself to life. Higher Power, work with me as I rebuild my world.
Action for the Day: I'll talk with a friend about hope. I'll see my hope as a sign of how close I am to my program.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I have a clear choice between life and death, between reality and fantasy, between health and sickness. I have to become responsible--responsible for mistakes as well as accomplishments. --Eileen Mayhew
Choosing to participate actively in our own lives ushers in joy and sometimes fear. We are energized by our conscious involvement; making thoughtful choices regarding our development heightens our sense of well-being. But occasionally we may fear potential failure. About as frequently, we may fear probable success.
Not every day do we want the responsibility for our lives; but we have it. On occasion we only want the loving arms of a caretaker. The beauty of our lives at this time is that we do have a caretaker at our beck and call, a caretaker who has demonstrated repeatedly a concern for our safety, a caretaker who will help us shoulder every responsibility we face.
Clearly, our coming to this program shows that we have chosen to act responsibly. And just as clearly, every day that we ask for the guidance to live to the best of our abilities, we will be helped to accomplish the tasks right for us in this stage of our lives.
All I have to do is make the right choices. I will always know which they are, when I ask for guidance.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Your candidate may give reasons why he need not follow all of the program. He may rebel at the thought of a drastic housecleaning which requires discussion with other people. Do not contradict such views. Tell him you once felt as he does, but you doubt whether you would have made much progress had you not taken action. On your first visit tell him about the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. If he shows interest, lend him your copy of this book.
p. 94
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Physician, Heal Thyself
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way until he realized that God, not he, was the Great Healer.
What is this power that A.A. possesses? This curative power? I don't know what it is. I suppose the doctor might say, "This is psychosomatic medicine." I suppose the psychiatrist might say, "This is benevolent interpersonal relations." I suppose others would say, "This is group psychotherapy."
To me it is God.
p. 308
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
The second difficulty is this: what comes to us alone may be garbled by our own rationalization and wishful thinking. The benefit of talking to another person is that we can get his direct comment and counsel on our situation, and there can be no doubt in our minds what that advice is. Going it alone in spiritual matters is dangerous. How many times have we heard well-intentioned people claim the guidance of God when it was all too plain that they were sorely mistaken. Lacking both practice and humility, they had deluded themselves and were able to justify the most arrant nonsense on the ground that this was what God had told them. It is worth noting that people of very high spiritual development almost always insist on checking with friends or spiritual advisers the guidance they feel they have received from God. Surely, then, a novice ought not lay himself open to the chance of making foolish, perhaps tragic, blunders in this fashion. While the comment or advice of others may be by no means infallible, it is likely to be far more specific than any direct guidance we may receive while we are still so inexperienced in establishing contact with a Power greater than ourselves.
p. 60
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You can get off the elevator anytime, but if you get back on it's only
going down.
--unknown
Happy memories never wear out. Relive them as often as you want.
--Anonymous
Our pasts are perfect in a way our minds can never fully understand.
We would not have the opportunities for awakening and experiencing
that are ours today, without exactly what happened. Now, it's what
we do with our pasts that provides the opportunity for growth. Today,
spend some time thinking about the gifts in your past that you may
have overlooked.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
Live your life and forget your age.
--Norman Vincent Peale
In the central place of every heart there is a recording chamber; so
long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, and courage, so
long are you young. When the wires are all down and your heart is
covered with the snows of pessimism and the ice of cynicism, and then
only, are you grown old.
--General Douglas MacArthur
"What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul."
--Yiddish Proverb
"The spirit, the will to win, and the will to excel are the things that
endure. These qualities are so much more important than the events
that occur."
--Vince Lombardi
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MISFORTUNE
"Experience has taught me this,
that we undo ourselves by
impatience. Misfortunes have their
life and their limits, their sickness
and their health."
--Michel de Montaigne
Nothing lasts forever. At times I feel sad, angry, resentful and
ashamed -- but it passes. In my recovery I have learned to live in "my
day" and accept the consequences of that day. I can only deal with life
as I experience it. Tomorrow is a new day with new experiences. And
some of the experiences are painful. Reality teaches me this. At times
I wish I could go through life without pain or rejection but I know that
is fantasy. Sobriety does not mean that everything will be perfect --
only better!
Nothing is so bad that I need to drink or use over it. Today I know that
alcohol increases my pain; it is never a solution. God, who has given
me today, will also give me a tomorrow -- and time eases the pain if I
work my program. Misfortunes are not worth drinking over. Nothing
lasts forever.
Thank You for the gift of a tomorrow.
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My God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19
Jesus says," Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can
bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you
bear fruit unless you remain in me."
John 15:4
"Surely God is my help; the Lord is the one who sustains me."
Psalm 54:4
"In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we
must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus
himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'"
Acts 20:35
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Daily Inspiration
God wants us happy right now and continually points us in that direction even when we look the other way. Lord, grant that nothing will turn me away from doing Your will.
They are wise who depend on God. Lord, Your perfect law revives my soul. Keeping Your law makes me rich.
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NA Just For Today
Twelfth Step "Failure"?
"Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."
Step Twelve
There is no such thing as a "failed" Twelfth Step call. Even if our prospect doesn't get clean, we have accomplished two purposes. We have planted the seed of recovery in the mind of the addict with whom we have shared our experience, strength, and hope. And we ourselves have stayed clean another day. Rarely does a recovering addict leave a Twelve Step call with anything but a deep dose of gratitude.
Sometimes we are practicing the Twelfth Step without realizing it. When our co-workers or other acquaintances know some of our history and see what kind of person we are today, they know where to go when they have a friend or loved one in need of our help. We are often the best attraction that NA has to offer.
For many addicts, the Twelfth Step is the cornerstone of recovery. We truly believe that "we can only keep what we have by giving it away" The paradox of the Twelfth Step is evident, for in giving, we receive.
Just for today: I will remember that I am a living example of the Twelfth Step. I cannot "fail" when I try to carry the message to another addict.
pg. 215
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He wanted to hold onto his fury, to guard it like a treasure. He would not let it be stolen from him . . .. But already, he felt it slipping, softened by Ben's compassionate touch. --Joe Johnson and Nilo Rodis-Jamero
The glassblower is an artist who takes broken glass and melts it in a very hot furnace. Then the glassblower blows through a long tube and creates objects such as cups and plates and pieces of art.
The sharp edges of our anger are like pieces of broken glass. We all have things in our lives that anger us--it is only human to bump into our sharp edges. One edge might be crabby, another silent and withdrawn, and still another yelling and screaming.
The heat of love and compassion can melt our anger. This may take the form of sympathy for ourselves, or for the people we love. More often, it is the compassion of those around us that helps melt our anger. Sometimes saying I'm sorry is a good way to melt anger and find the love underneath it.
What beauty can I create with my anger today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Everyone once, once only. Just once and no more. And we also once. Never again. But this having been once, although only once, to have been of the earth, seems irrevocable. --Rainer Maria Rilke
In the hopelessness of addiction and codependency, and as children of addicts, some of us have considered suicide, and some of us have actually tried to kill ourselves. We have maintained the option as an escape in case life got too difficult. Now, in recovery, we have chosen life. We've stopped killing ourselves in the slow ways of our old behaviors, yet some of us hold on to our ace in the hole. Either consciously or unconsciously, we haven't made that unconditional commitment to life.
It may be one firmer step into recovery - a vote for the life we have been given - to say, "I will never choose suicide. Whatever comes my way, it is not an option for me." When we give up that one final controlling maneuver, we may find ourselves freer to live in this one irretrievable life we've been given.
In choosing to be totally on the side of life, I step further into the care of God. Whatever 1 must meet, God is with me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I have a clear choice between life and death, between reality and fantasy, between health and sickness. I have to become responsible--responsible for mistakes as well as accomplishments. --Eileen Mayhew
Choosing to participate actively in our own lives ushers in joy and sometimes fear. We are energized by our conscious involvement; making thoughtful choices regarding our development heightens our sense of well-being. But occasionally we may fear potential failure. About as frequently, we may fear probable success.
Not every day do we want the responsibility for our lives; but we have it. On occasion we only want the loving arms of a caretaker. The beauty of our lives at this time is that we do have a caretaker at our beck and call, a caretaker who has demonstrated repeatedly a concern for our safety, a caretaker who will help us shoulder every responsibility we face.
Clearly, our coming to this program shows that we have chosen to act responsibly. And just as clearly, every day that we ask for the guidance to live to the best of our abilities, we will be helped to accomplish the tasks right for us in this stage of our lives.
All I have to do is make the right choices. I will always know which they are, when I ask for guidance.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Keep at It
Keep practicing your recovery behaviors, even when they feel awkward, even when they haven't quite taken yet, even if you don't get it yet.
Sometimes it takes years for a recovery concept to move from our mind into our heart and soul. We need to work at recovery behaviors with the diligence, effort, and repeated practice we applied to codependent behaviors. We need to force ourselves to do things even when they don't feel natural. We need to tell ourselves we care about ourselves and can take care of ourselves even when we don't believe what we're saying.
We need to do it, and do it, and do it - day after day, year after year.
It is unreasonable to expect this new way of life to sink in overnight. We may have to "act as if" for months, years, before recovery behaviors become ingrained and natural.
Even after years, we may find ourselves, in times of stress or duress, reverting to old ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving.
We may have layers of feelings we aren't ready to acknowledge until years into our recovery. That's okay! When it's time, we will.
Do not give up! It takes time to get self-love into the core of us. It takes repeated practice. Time and experience. Lessons, lessons, and more lessons.
Then, just when we think we've arrived, we find we have more to learn.
That's the joy of recovery. We get to keep learning and growing all of our life!
Keep on taking care of yourself, no matter what. Keep on plugging away at recovery behaviors, one day at a time. Keep on loving yourself, even when it doesn't feel natural. Act as if for as long as necessary, even if that time period feels longer than necessary.
One day, it will happen. You will wake up, and find that what you've been struggling with and working so hard at and forcing yourself to do, finally feels comfortable. It has hit our soul.
Then, you go on to learn something new and better.
Today, I will plug away at my recovery behaviors, even if they don't feel natural. I will force myself to go through the motions even if that feels awkward. I will work at loving myself until I really do.
When I turn a problem over to my Higher Power today, I will let go with the confidence that all is being handled for me. After I have done all my footwork, I know the results will work out just as they are supposed to. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Don’t Get Ahead of Yourself
I pulled out the map. I’ll go here, I thought, and there. I’ll visit this place, then that one. My mind raced with excitement at all the places left to see. I felt overwhelmed, wondering if I could get to all the places I wanted to visit. For a moment I forgot to look around and appreciate where I was– in the forest at the foot of Mount Olympus in Olympic State Park.
Don’t get ahead of yourself. There are many wonderful places left to visit, many experiences to have, many people to meet and enjoy. But you aren’t there yet. There will be some trials,too. More lessons along the path. But you aren’t there yet,either.
Stay in this moment. It contains the experience you need to have. This moment contains your happiness. Living this moment, being fully present for it, is the way to get to the next experience, the next person, the next emotion, the next adventure. Cherish the moment. Feel all there is to feel. See all there is to see.
Learn the lessons of today, and you will be prepared for the adventures and joys of tomorrow.
Be here now. This is the only place you need to be. And from this place, all things are possible.
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More Language Of Letting Go
See how much courage you have
Everyone is in awe of the lion-tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions– everyone but a school bus driver.
–Unknown
You may not be a great warrior. You might not lead explorations to the North Pole or climb Mount Everest. But you still need courage.
Courage lies in the simple things as well as the grandiose. It’s fun and easy to speculate about how we would respond in our fantasy lives– climbing that mountain or leading knights into battle– but what about now?
Do you have the courage to live your life, to walk your path every day, right where you are?
Sometimes, it takes more courage to do the ordinary things in life than it does to walk to the door of the airplane and jump.
It takes courage to get sober, to stay sober, to get up every day and go to your job, support your family, pay the bills, and walk the path that you have been given to walk. We all need courage to do the thing that scares us and sometimes to do the thing that doesn’t scare us, over and over again.
God, please grant me the courage to do the right thing in my relationships, in my job, and in my spiritual growth. Please give me the courage to live my life.
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In God’s Care
To feel extraordinarily small and unimportant is always a wholesome feeling.
~~Robert H. Benson
There’s something spiritual about laying under the stars on a clear night. The immensity of the universe is enough to put our life into perspective. It can lift the weight of the world from our shoulders. While we may feel our burdens are heavy and our responsibilities endless, just a glimpse of that twinkling night sky helps us realize we are not quite as important as we sometimes think.
But just as each of those billions of stars has a place in the heavens, so do we have a place in God’s plan. Our influence may be small, our light may not shine far, but just as each star has a place, we too have a role in the Divine plan. Through God’s love, we can enjoy our connection to the universe.
Today I will enjoy being too small to carry the whole world on my shoulders.
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Day By Day
Practicing the principles
Our program and its principles apply to every area of our lives. Sometimes people say that they would lose their livelihood if they applied the principles to their work. But this is probably not true and speaks of fear. If we must lie or be hypocritical in any area of our lives, then we are not applying the principles.
Once we realize that it is reassuring and rewarding – not threatening – to let God work through us all the time, we will feel genuine, we will feel integrity, we will feel at peace.
Do I practice these principles in all my affairs?
Higher Power, help me see whether any area of my life is missing the benefit of the principles.
The principle I will apply today in all my affairs is…
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Food for Thought
Gifts
The OA program is a gift to us from our Higher Power. Without it, we would still be bogged down in compulsive overeating with no solution in sight. Our fellowship gives us the hope and love we need to sort ourselves out and begin to live a new life.
Recovery through abstinence is the gift, which we are offered every day. In order to receive it, we need to be sincere and earnest in our efforts to work the program. We can count on God’s support if we are willing to go to any lengths to stop eating compulsively.
With gratitude for these gifts from our Higher Power, we are able to give back what has come to us. We share our program and give our time and abilities where we see a need that we can fill. The more we give, the more we receive. God’s abundance is inexhaustible.
We thank You for Your gifts.
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Wave Motion
Hado by Madisyn Taylor
The study of hado tells us that the energetic vibrations from our thoughts affect our physical realities.
Walking through a Japanese garden, one truly feels the life force energy that is known as Hado. Hado isn’t just present in Japan, but it is a concept that has existed in Japan for centuries. The two Japanese characters that make up the word Hado mean “wave” and “move” - perfect words to describe the energy vibrations that permeate all life. Hado is present in all things, animate and inanimate. It resides everywhere, even in the air and in people.
The study of hado tells us that the energetic vibrations from our thoughts affect on our physical realities. Each of us has the ability to manifest a specific intention through the hado that we send out – from making our jewelry shine to changing the atmosphere of a room full of people to transforming the hado of an empty space. However, we are often unaware that our thoughts are creating vibrations in the world outside our minds. Once we know that this is the case, we can become more aware of our negative thinking and train ourselves to stay positive and think with intention.
Giving thanks for a meal before we eat can change the energy of our food. Expressing gratitude by thoughts or words makes a huge difference to both the giver and recipient because you are sending them hado. A kind smile really makes a difference when you work consciously with hado. Once we become aware of the power of hado, we can create positive changes in every area of our lives: our physical space, mental and emotional health, relationships, and businesses. One of the most important principles of hado is to monitor your thoughts and intentions every day. Enjoy the improvements that you will create in your life and the world around you by consciously working with hado. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The slogans of The Program are seemngly clear adn simple. Yet they may still have different meanings for different people, according to their own experience and reaction to the words and ideas. Take, for example, the slogan Let Go and Let God. For some people, it may suggest that all we have to do is sidestep teh challenges that confront us and , somehow, God will do all the work. We must remember that God gives us free will, intelligence and good senses — it is clearly His intention that we use these gifts. If I’m receptive, God will make His will known to me step by step, but I must carry it out. Do I sometimes act as if surrender to God’s will is a passport to inertia?
Today I Pray
May my “passport” be stamped with “action.” May my travels be motivated by challenges I can readily recognize as things to do, not things to watch. I pray that I may make the most of my gifts from God, of talents that I am aware of and some I have yet to discover. May I not “let go” and give up but keep on learning, growing, doing, serving, praying, carrying out the will of God as I understand It.
Today I Will Remember
God meant me to make the most of myself.
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One More Day
He who knows others is learned, he who knows himself is wise.
– Lao Tsze
We sometimes let how we think we should act keep us from showing our deepest feelings. We may behave the way others expect us to act, while burying within ourselves the pain and fears associated with our changing health.
Acting upon our own thoughts and feelings can be difficult; acting according to what others think is frustrating — and impossible. Gradually we find more stability and confidence within ourselves. This self-trust allows us to show our emotions and to express our ideas and feelings. We might be short-tempered sometimes, or impatient, or angry. None of us is perfect. We accept that truth, and are freed of the burden of pleasing others; we discover the joy of acting on our inner messages of growth and honesty.
I am most free to grow when I am acting honestly on my own values and feelings.
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One Day At A Time
~ OPPORTUNITIES ~
A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.
Francis Bacon
There is a promise that more will be revealed as we trudge the road of happy destiny. We all start by building on the basics, the foundation that must be in place. In grade school I learned to read and write; in high school, how to research and train myself to acquire information. In college, I gained specific advanced information that allowed me to build upon, and advance my interests. When I applied the same principles to the program, I got similar results, but even more so. When my mind was opened to spiritual principles, I received much more than that I was seeking. My thoughts were lifted to a much higher plane of ethics.
In searching for an answer to compulsive overeating, I was exposed to additional opportunities to grow by doing. Often I tried them. These exercises sent my thoughts to other areas, which I again explored. I am amazed at what I have learned while looking for something else.
We can all learn truth if we will open our hearts and minds. We will then be without excuse not to exercise every opportunity to practice it.
One Day at a Time . . .
Am I taking advantage of every opportunity to grow?
Some opportunities?
Any opportunities?
~ Jeremiah ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
VII. The Charter and Bylaws of the General Service Board are legal instruments, empowering the trustees to manage and conduct world service affairs. The Conference Charter is not a legal document; it relies upon tradition and the A.A. purse for final effectiveness.
VIII. The trustees are the principal planners and administrators of overall policy and finance. They have custodial oversight of the separately incorporated and constantly active services, exercising this through their ability to elect all the directors of these entities.
IX. Good service leadership at all levels is indispensable for our future functioning and safety. Primary world service leadership, once exercised by the founders, must necessarily be assumed by the trustees. - Pg. 574 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - VII - The Twelve Concepts ( Short Form )
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
One hour at a time leads to one day at a time in our recovery program. Each hour is one of 24 building blocks of each day of our sobriety and clean time. My current building block is to radiate love for this hour.
Help me center my emotions and radiate love for this hour.
The Work of Living
God and I have work to do, together we have a life to co-create. Mine. I will daily spend time tuning into that deeper place within me so that I can use my energies more wisely and efficiently to build my life. I will get farther faster when I live consciously rather than unconsciously, when I look for guidance rather than stress unnecessarily and create problems that don't need to be there. When I stay calm and centered, my life goes more smoothly. When I allow spirit to guide me through my day, I see beauty where I may have missed it, I have a center to work from and return to and I walk in grace rather than stumble my way through the day.
I am held and open to divine instruction
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you lose your temper, you lose.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
When I turn a problem over to my Higher Power today, I will let go with the confidence that all is being handled for me. After I have done all my footwork, I know the results will work out just as they are supposed to.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I wanted to be Jimi Hendrix but I was Pat Boone. - Peter N.
bluidkiti
07-25-2015, 09:10 AM
July 26
Daily Reflections
THE "WORTH" OF SOBRIETY
Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside
contributions.
TWELVE AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 160
When I go shopping I look at the prices and if I need what I see, I buy
it and pay. Now that I am supposed to be in rehabilitation, I have to
straighten out my life. When I go to a meeting, I take a coffee with
sugar and milk, sometimes more than one. But at the collection time, I
am either too bust to take money out of my purse, or I do not have
enough, but I am there because I need this meeting. I heard someone
suggest dropping the price of a beer into the basket, and I thought,
that's too much! I almost never give one dollar. Like many others, I
rely on the more generous members to finance the Fellowship. I forget
that it takes money to rent the meeting room, buy my milk, sugar and
cups. I will pay, without hesitation, ninety cents for a cup of coffee at a
restaurant after the meeting; I always have money for that. So, how
much is my sobriety and my inner peace worth?
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When we come to the end of our lives on earth, we will take no
material thing with us. We will not take one cent in our cold, dead
hands. The only things that we may take are the things we have given
away. If we have helped others, we may take that with us; if we have
given our time and money for the good of A.A., we may take that with
us. Looking back over our lives, what are we proud of? Not what have
we gained for ourselves, but what few good deeds we have done.
Those are the things that really matter in the long run. What will I
take with me when I go?
Meditation For The Day
"Hallowed be Thy Name." What does that mean to us? Here "name"
is used in the sense of "spirit." The words mean praise to God for His
spirit in the world, making us better. We should be especially grateful
for God's spirit, which gives us the strength to overcome all that is
base in our lives. His spirit is powerful. It can help us to live a
conquering, abundant life. So we praise and thank Him for His spirit in
our lives and in the lives of others.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be grateful for God's spirit in me. I pray that I may
try to live in accordance with it.
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As Bill Sees It
The Fellowship's Future, p.207
"It seems proved that A.A. can stand on its own feet anywhere and
under any conditions. It has outgrown any dependence it might once
have had upon the personalities or efforts of a few of the older
members like me. New, able, and vigorous people keep coming to the
surface, turning up where they are needed. Besides, A.A. has reached
enough spiritual maturity to know that its final dependence is upon
God."
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Clearly, our first duty to A.A.'s future is to maintain in full strength
what we have now. Only the most vigilant caretaking can assure this.
Never should we be lulled into complacent self-satisfaction by the wide
acclaim and success that are everywhere ours. This is the subtle
temptation which could render us stagnant today, perchance
disintegrate us tomorrow. We have always rallied to meet and
transcend failure and crisis. Problems have been our stimulants. How
well, though, shall we be able to meet the problems of success?
1. Letter, 1940
2. A.A. Today, p. 106
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Walk In Dry Places
Never withholding ourselves..............Living Sober.
We may have let ourselves believe that were supposed to display an attitude that expresses our opinions of others. If a person is crude and boorish, we should be cool and defensive for our self-protection. If a person is warm and friendly, we should respond in warm and friendly ways.
If we have believed these things, then were actually letting others control our attitudes and behavior. We are letting personalities interfere with the high principles we are learning in AA. We are not living at the best possible level.
In reality, we should always display an attitude that reflects kindness, optimism, friendliness, and concern. There other persons disposition, whether its sour or sweet, should have nothing to do with our being what we want to be. We should never withhold the fine inner qualities that develop and grow as we continue to live the program.
In time, we begin to learn that this attitude always comes back to us in the form of greater peace and happiness. And what's great about it is that its always under our direct control.
As I go about my business today, I will express a kindliness and concern toward everybody. Nobody's behavior can make me adopt a suspicious or defensive attitude
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Keep It Simple
I was never less alone when by myself.---Edward Gibson
To stay in this program, we need to accept that we have an illness. We need to accept that we were
out of control. And we need to accept that we need others and they need us. At times, we won't want to accept these facts. We will want to deny we have an illness and our lives were out of control.
Many of us get into trouble when we don't accept that we need others. This is why helping others is so important. It teaches us that we need others, and others need us. By helping others, we learn about the give-and-take of human relationships. There is no give-an-take in addiction. There is just take. Now, finally, we can give too!
Prayer for the Day: I pray to remember that I need other people.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll help out. I will make coffee at the next meeting or offer to do the Step next week. I will let a fellow addict know I'm glad he or she is sober.
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Each Day a New Beginning
We want the facts to fit the preconceptions. When they don't, it is easier to ignore the facts than to change the preconceptions. --Jessamyn West
To live fully and creatively, to contribute what is only ours to give, requires that we be receptive, wholly, to the reverberations of each present moment. Even anticipation of what may transpire next can prejudice our minds, our level of awareness. Preconceptions cloud our senses. They prevent the actual situation from being fully realized. And it is only in the now, as sensed moment by moment, that we find our cues to proceed along the path chosen for us.
As we grow more comfortable with Step Three, daily turning our lives and wills over to the care of God, we'll see how much more rewarding our experiences are. We'll see, too, how much greater are our own contributions. Preconceptions of any situation, persons, anticipated experience, dulls the magic, the depth of the moment. And only when we attune ourselves to the invitation of the moment do we give of ourselves, wholly. Our partnership with God lives now, as we go forth in this moment.
I will look to each moment with childish eyes. I'll find joy and contentment.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Unless your friend wants to talk further about himself, do not wear out your welcome. Give him a chance to think it over. If you do stay, let him steer the conversation in any direction he like. Sometimes a new man is anxious to proceed at once, and you may be tempted to let him do so. This is sometimes a mistake. If he has trouble later, he is likely to say you rushed him. You will be most successful with alcoholics if you do not exhibit any passion for crusade or reform. Never talk down to an alcoholic from any moral or spiritual hilltop; simply lay out the kit of spiritual tools for his inspection. Show him how they worked with you. Offer him friendship and fellowship. Tell him that if he wants to get well you will do anything to help.
p. 95
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
I came through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous at age seventeen, a walking contradiction. On the outside, I was the portrait of a rebellious teenager, with miles of attitude to spare. On the inside, I was suicidal, bloodied, and beaten. My stride spoke of a confidence I didn't feel. My dress was that of a street-tough kid you didn't want to mess with. Inside I was trembling with fear that someone would see through my defenses to the real me.
p. 309
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Our next problem will be to discover the person in whom we are to confide. Here we ought to take much care, remembering that prudence is a virtue which carries a high rating. Perhaps we shall need to share with this person facts about ourselves which no others ought to know. We shall want to speak with someone who is experienced, who not only has stayed dry but has been able to surmount other serious difficulties. Difficulties, perhaps, like our own. This person may turn out to be one's sponsor, but not necessarily so. If you have developed a high confidence in him, and his temperament and problems are close to your own, then such a choice will be good. Besides, your sponsor already has the advantage of knowing something about your case.
pp. 60-61
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The future starts today, not tomorrow.
--Pope John Paul II
Don't live in the past...you have already been there.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
The secret lies in how we handle today, not yesterday or
tomorrow. Today...that special block of time holding the key that
locks out yesterday's nightmares and unlocks tomorrow's dreams.
--Charles Swindoll
Let everyone try and find that as a result of daily prayer he adds
something new to his life, something with which nothing can be
compared.
--Mahatma Gandhi
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize
they were the big things."
--Robert Brault
As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in
his way.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
The paradox of control is simple. The more we try to control life, the
less control we have.
--Joan Borysenko, Ph.D.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ADVERSITY
"Adversity reveals genius,
prosperity conceals it."
--Horace
Today I believe that the only way to understand God, the world,
my neighbor and myself is through some degree of suffering. Pain
and suffering are humbling in the truest sense; they stop you from
being arrogant, selfish and "prideful".
I know this because I was a spoiled child. My family tried to give
me everything. Whatever I wanted was given to me; my way or no
way! This sick love robbed me of humility and separated me from
humanity: it made me feel different, selfish and place me on a
pity-pot. Being spoiled stopped me experiencing the real world and
stopped me from growing.
Today adversity is part of life and part of being human. Not to
grow through adversity is to die. To have everything is to
experience nothing. To feel in life -- to have emotion -- demands
adversity and pain.
Teach me to be grateful for the suffering that leads to growth.
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Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your
gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about
anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with
thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God,
which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your
minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is
right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if
anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.
Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in
me--put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
Phillipians 4:4-9
"He has shown you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD
require of you But to do justly, To love mercy, And to walk humbly
with your God?"
Micah 6:8
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Daily Inspiration
Avoid being self-conscious and you will have more time to have fun and enjoy the moment. Lord, help me take myself less seriously and place my focus on those around me.
Courage gives us the trust in God to follow our hearts no matter what obstacles seem to block our way. Lord, I love You.
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NA Just For Today
Unconditional Surrender
"Help for addicts begins only when we are able to admit complete defeat. This can be frightening, but it is the foundation on which we have built our lives."
Basic Text, p.22
Most of us have tried everything we can think of, exerted every ounce of force possible, to fill the spiritual hole inside us. Nothing - not drugs, not control and management, not sex, money, property, power, or prestige - has filled it. We are powerless; our lives are unmanageable, at least by ourselves alone. Our denial will not change that fact.
So we surrender; we ask a Higher Power to care for our will and our lives. Sometimes in surrendering, we don't know that a Power greater than ourselves exists which can restore us to wholeness. Sometimes we're not sure that the God of our understanding will care for our unmanageable lives. Our lack of certainty, though, does not affect the essential truth: We are powerless. Our lives are unmanageable. We must surrender. Only by doing so can we open ourselves wide - wide enough for our old ideas and past wreckage to be cleared, wide enough for a Higher Power to enter.
Just for today: I will surrender unconditionally. I can make it as easy or as hard as I choose. Either way, I will do it.
pg. 216
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Isn't it great life is open-ended! --Brigitte Frase
Elizabeth Lawton, known as "Grandma Layton," is an American artist who never drew a picture until she was sixty-eight years old. She spent all the years before that time trying to cope with depression. She had gone through therapy, medications, and shock treatment and continued to be severely depressed. But then she signed up for an art class and the act of drawing cured her depression. She continues to make fabulous pictures.
What does she think about the critical acclaim her artwork has received? She says she wants others to know about her art so it may give hope to those who have also "suffered from feelings."
Many of us have suffered from feelings. We must remember that we can each turn to our creativity--at any age--as a source for our well-being. All we need to do is have faith in the potential goodness within ourselves and those we love.
What creative activity can I look to for comfort today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The lust for power is not rooted in strength but in weakness. --Erich Fromm
Many of us have felt so insecure, so poor, or so much the underdog that we made a fervent promise to ourselves that we'd come out on top later. We know how weak we felt, and that image continues to be our guiding force long after the weakness was overcome. We may have spiritual problems because we are blind to the reality of our present life. While grasping for more security, more love, more money, or trying to lose more weight or attract more friends, we fail to stop and realize the real rewards we already have today. We are driven by the memory of pain and insecurity, rather than rising above it and relating to the higher principles and people around us. Getting more control or more achievements does not solve our spiritual problems, but by making peace with the fact that life is insecure.
Today, I will let go of my grasping for more. I will let go of it again and again throughout the day so I am not ruled by this weakness.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
We want the facts to fit the preconceptions. When they don't, it is easier to ignore the facts than to change the preconceptions. --Jessamyn West
To live fully and creatively, to contribute what is only ours to give, requires that we be receptive, wholly, to the reverberations of each present moment. Even anticipation of what may transpire next can prejudice our minds, our level of awareness. Preconceptions cloud our senses. They prevent the actual situation from being fully realized. And it is only in the now, as sensed moment by moment, that we find our cues to proceed along the path chosen for us.
As we grow more comfortable with Step Three, daily turning our lives and wills over to the care of God, we'll see how much more rewarding our experiences are. We'll see, too, how much greater are our own contributions. Preconceptions of any situation, persons, anticipated experience, dulls the magic, the depth of the moment. And only when we attune ourselves to the invitation of the moment do we give of ourselves, wholly. Our partnership with God lives now, as we go forth in this moment.
I will look to each moment with childish eyes. I'll find joy and contentment.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Owning Our Power
Don't you see? We do not have to be so victimized by life, by people, by situations, by work, by our friends, by our love relationships, by our family, by our feelings, our thoughts, our circumstances, and ourselves.
We are not victims. We do not have to be victims. That is the whole point!
Yes, admitting and accepting powerlessness is important. But that is the first step, an introduction to this business of recovery. Later, comes owning our power. Changing what we can. This is as important as admitting and accepting powerlessness. And there is so much we can change.
We can own our power, wherever we are, wherever we go, whomever we are with. We do not have to stand there with our hands tied, groveling helplessly, submitting to whatever comes along. There are things we can do. We can speak up. Solve the problem. Use the problem to motivate ourselves to do something good for ourselves.
We can make ourselves feel good. We can walk away. We can come back on our terms. We can stand up for ourselves. We can refuse to let others control and manipulate us.
We can do what we need to do to take care of our selves. That is the beauty, the reward, the crown of victory we are given in this process called recovery. It is what it is all about!
If we can't do anything about the circumstance, we can change our attitude. We can do the work within: courageously face our issues so we are not victimized. We have been given a miraculous key to life.
We are victims no more unless we want to be.
Freedom and joy are ours for the taking, for the feeling, for the hard work we have done.
Today, I will remind myself as often as necessary that I am not a victim, and I do not need to be victimized by whatever comes my way. I will work hard to remove myself as a victim, whether that means setting and enforcing a boundary, walking away, dealing with my feelings, or giving myself what I need. God, help me let go of my need to feel victimized.
Today I will allow to just be without judgment, without criticism. I will accept all that happens with love and gentleness.
--Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Find Places of Repose
I was driving down a Nevada highway feeling tense and agitated when the sign appeared. “To the Nature Sanctuary.” Ignored the first entrance; then turned at the second one. In a few short feet, the road and scenery changed from barren, flat highway into a terrain of serene repose. A family of ducks bathed and swam in a small lake, surrounded by trees. Tiny wrens pecked at the gravel. A boy about thirteen sat fishing, a picnic lunch by his side. In only a few minutes, my agitation disappeared. I had found a place of peace.
Rest when you become tense, afraid, upset. Rest until peace returns. Stop what you’re doing. Take a moment, take an hour. Take the time you need to restore peace. Breathe deeply. Breathe in the quiet beauty of the world around you. Let it be a sanctuary that soothes and calms your soul.
Places of healing and repose are moments away. Find them in the world around you. Then discover those places in yourself. The universe holds the antidote for your fears and agitation. It offers all the healing you need. That healing is right around the corner.
Take a moment, take an hour. When you feel your peace interrupted, look for a place of repose.
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More Language Of Letting Go
See what feels right to you
“French Valley traffic, Cessna 80809 taking active runway one-eight for left crosswind departure. French Valley.”
I turned onto eighteen, pushed the throttle in, then held my breath as the little gold-and-white plane sped down the runway, then lifted off the ground. I pulled back on the yoke, lifting her gently, but not too gently. She needed to clear the trees, houses, and towers in front of me. But if I lifted her nose too fast, too high, we’d lose speed and go into a stall.
There was a lot to think about, trying to do this right.
We began to ascend, just past five hundred feet, when the plane began hopping about in the air. It was just the wind, but it was those same hurdles of air, the lifting and the dropping and the being bounced around, that made me feel like we were going to suddenly fall out of the sky.
“You’ve got the controls,” I screamed at Rob.
“No, you’ve got the controls,” he said, placing his hands resolutely in his lap.
“Rob, I’m scared,” I said. “I feel really uncomfortable.”
“Then breathe.”
I couldn’t breathe, at least not the way he meant– consciously, breath in, breath out, calming myself down. Holding my breath was a habit, one I’d acquired early in my life. Holding my breath was how I responded to my fear.
I got the plane up to one thousand feet, then two thousand. I wasn’t comfortable, but I climbed to five thousand feet so we could do the maneuvers we had planned.
I tried to relax and breathe, but I still felt overwhelmed. I couldn’t relax.
Rob was fidgeting with something; I wasn’t sure what. I kept watching outside the plane for other traffic, then watching inside the plane at the gauges. I was about to give up trying when suddenly, Rob began sticking pieces of paper over each of the dials.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Teaching you to trust yourself,” he said. “Tell me when it feels like we’re going at sixty-five knots,” he sad.
Now, I had to relax. “About now,” I said.
He uncovered the dial. We were at sixty-five knots.
“Now, do a coordinated turn of thirty degrees– without checking the instrument panel,” he said. “Tell me when it feels right to you.”
I relaxed even more deeply, gently guiding the plane into a slow coordinated turn.
“Perfect,” he said, showing me the gauges.
“See,” he said, confidently. “You’re just scaring yourself by confusing yourself in your head, with all these dials and all you think you have to do to get it right. All you really need to do is relax and trust what feels right to you.”
Let go of fear and confusion. Stop overwhelming yourself with all you have to do, and trying to get it right. Get information. Read books. Get help. Then relax. You know more than you think.
You’ll know when you’re getting ti right.
Trust what feels right to you.
God, help me learn to let go of my fears and trust when it feels right to me.
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In God’s Care
It is not the image we create of God which proves God. It is the effort we make to create this image.
~~Pierre Lecomte du Nouy
Not very many of us have the truly dramatic spiritual experience that dispells, for all time, our insecurity and our doubts about God’s existence. We may know someone who has been this fortunate, but most of us have to give frequent or daily attention to prayer, meditation, and perhaps affirmations in order to develop the faith that can come to everyone.
Our path for developing conscious contact with God makes God a familiar companion in our daily life. Our thoughts of God can remind us that God cares and is in charge. Exercising our mind in this way is not unlike exercising our body. Just as our repeated physical efforts strengthen our muscles, our belief is strengthened into faith when we make the remembrance of God’s presence a daily practice.
I will remember God today.
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Day By Day
Avoiding pity
Coming into the fellowship, newcomers may see older members as unsympathetic, unsupportive, or even rude. Old-timers don’t mince words with newcomers who aren’t ready to stop using: “Go back out and try some more if you haven’t had enough.” Old-timers don’t pity newcomers. While they understand the fear and pain, they also know that pity will kill because pity leads to self-pity and evgentually back to using.
So if old-timers seem harsh it’s out of loving, knowing hearts – it’s out of tough love.
Have I stopped pitying myself (and others)?
Higher Power, help me avoid self-pity so I can do what I need to do to recover.
Today I will avoid self-pity by…
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Food for Thought
Doing God’s Will
For a long time, most of us tried to achieve happiness by serving our self-will. We figured out what we wanted from life and then went about trying to attain it. When our efforts were frustrated, we turned to food and overeating.
The idea of giving our self-will to God and following His direction makes us fearful. We fear that we will lose out and be unhappy. We are reluctant to give up our illusions of autonomy and power. We wonder if there really is a Higher Power who can direct our way. We pray for guidance and then forget to listen for the response.
When we are willing to trust a Higher Power in even one small area of our lives, we begin to see results. As our faith grows, we become confident enough to relinquish more and more of the concerns, which by ourselves we are unable to manage. The more we work this program, the more sure we are that our peace and happiness lie in serving God, rather than ourselves.
I pray for courage to follow Your will.
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Half-Full Consciousness
Starting from Empty by Madisyn Taylor
Live your life as if your glass is half-full rather than half-empty, all you need is a change of thought.
We are all familiar with the metaphorical story of two people looking at the same glass and one perceiving it as half-full while the other sees it as half-empty. As much as we’ve heard this, it’s still a valuable exercise to really observe our minds and notice whether we are engaged in half-full or half-empty thinking. People will refer to themselves as being of one type or the other as if it was a permanent characteristic, but we are all capable of shifting into a half-full consciousness if we simply make the effort.
When we look at our lives with half-empty consciousness, we perceive a lack and think that the other half of what we want is missing. We are coming from a position of expectation and entitlement. On the other hand, when we look at our lives as half-full we perceive fullness. It is as if we recognize that our cup could be fully empty and so we are grateful for what we see as bounty—not something we expect or believe we are owed, but a gift. In half-full consciousness, we count our blessings. When we look at our lives we see all the elements that are in place and all the things we do have. This doesn’t necessarily mean we don’t seek more, but we seek from a place of fullness instead of from a place of lack. This fullness draws positive energy into our lives and often attracts more abundance.
If you would like to begin to make the shift into half-full consciousness, try imagining your life as an empty glass. This is your life without all the people you know, the work you do, your home, or your current state of physical wellbeing. This is just an empty, open space waiting to be filled. Once you have that feeling of openness in your mind, begin filling it with all the people, things, and places that make up your life. You may be surprised to find your glass overflowing. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Now that I avail myself of the letters H-O-W suggested by friends in The Program – Honesty, Open-Mindedness, Willingness – I see things differently. In ways that I couldn’t have predicted and surely never expected, I’ve come to see things quite differently from the person I was before coming to The Program. I feel good most days. I seldom feel bad, and never for long. Certainly never as bad as I used to feel all of the time. Is my worst day now infinitely better than my best day previously?
Today I Pray
May I remember today to say “thank you” to my Higher Power, to my friends in the group and to the whole, vast fellowship of recovering chemically dependent persons for making me know that things do get better. I give thanks, too, for those verbal boosters, the tags and slogans which have so often burst into my brain at exactly the moments when they were needed, redefining my purp0ose, restoring my patience, reminding me of my God.
Today I Will Remember
How it was.
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One More Day
The future is called “perhaps,” which is the only possible thing to call the future. and the important thing is not to allow that to scare you.
– Tennessee Williams
“I’m going to work in the mills, like my Dad.” “I’m going to be a teacher.” “I want to be a soldier.” As children, we believed in these absolute, fixed goals. In adulthood, we learn that we can’t always get what we expect. Sometimes we don’t even come close. Those who manage to live happy and fulfilling lives are flexible, mature adults.
Flexibility means we can incorporate changes into our lives, ween when those changes cause indifference in the way we live. What’s most important is to remember that we can change goals and attain them, that happiness is there if we work and plan for it.
I am not afraid to make changes that are good for me.
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One Day At A Time
SURRENDER
“Most folks are as happy
as they make up their minds to be.”
Abraham Lincoln
More than seven years ago I weighed over 320 pounds and was living the painful life of a compulsive eater. Nothing I tried helped me to make lasting changes … until I began my recovery program. This healing process included Twelve Step recovery, therapy, and changing my life completely. I ended a long-term relationship and moved 2,300 miles away from all of my family and friends. I had no idea as to the extent of this journey I was beginning.
I've learned how ignorant I can be ~ and how wise I am. I’ve learned that humility is not humiliation ~ it is found by maintaining a willingness to learn. I've been taught how to walk through my fears. I've been shown that my HP and God are in all things ~ and that Spirit follows and supports me with each and every step I take. Some of those steps go forwards, some backwards … yet with each there is progress.
I've never forgotten the pain. Some days it's very severe because I don't have the food to numb it or to hide behind. Thanks to my program, I can always see hope and joy all around me now, even in the midst of pain.
I now weigh 220 pounds. Somehow I've lost 100 pounds of my old self and am beginning to see the new me. The new me is still losing weight. The new me is also incredibly beautiful, deserving, loving, and worthy ... all things I thought I wasn't. I'm slowly, gently, learning that with each day I live well ... I AM WELL! I am only as happy as I am choosing to be.
One Day at a Time . . .
I pray for complete surrender.
I ask for patience, abstinence and peace.
I reflect on where I've come from,
and remember to embrace the deepest gratitude
for where I am now. Today I am well.
~ Melanie S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
X. Every service responsibility should be matched by an equal service authority, with the scope of such authority will defined.
XI. The trustees should always have the best possible committees, corporate service directors, executives, staffs, and consultants. Composition, qualifications, induction procedures, and rights and duties will always be matters of serious concern.
XII. The Conference shall observe the spirit of A.A. traditions, taking care that it never becomes the seat of perilous wealth or power; that sufficient operating funds and reserve be its prudent financial principle; that it place none of its members in a position of unqualified authority over others; that it reach all important decisions by discussion, vote, and, and, whenever possible, by substantial unanimity; that its actions never be personally punitive nor an incitement to public controversy; that it never perform acts of government, and that, like the Society it serves, it will always remain democratic in thought and action. - Pg. 574 - 4th. Edition - Appendices - VII - The Twelve Concepts ( Short Form )
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Frequently, throughout the day we hear the Babbler, a silent running dialogue in our head ready to put us down at any opportunity, 'You're stupid; they're stupid; who wants sobriety; boy, is this dumb.' Babbler is not the voice of our Higher Power. It is the voice of addiction putting us down.
May the Babbler's words fall on deaf ears. I am sober, worthy, and this program is where I belong.
Learning My Own Lessons
I recognize today that I am in charge of my own learning. Life is constantly offering up circumstances that are useful in my personal growth. I can move through the situation, live it out, extract the wisdom that is in it or I can ignore the lesson and keep repeating the same painful circumstance over and over again in my life. The deepest and most appropriate things I need to learn in life are generally right in front of me. Life is my guru if I can use it as such. It is rich with subtle learning if I look for it. The gift I can give myself today is becoming aware of what life is trying to teach me.
My lessons come from my life.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The AA Big Book, The NA Basic Text, and the CDA First Edition do not need to be rewritten. They need to be reread.
I begin this day by reading at least one page from my program's basic book.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You spend more time with yourself than with anyone else. Doesn't it make sense to put something into that relationship?
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will allow to just be without judgement, with criticism. I will accept all that happens with love and gentleness.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
What works for one person may be good, but if it's not in the program, not the steps, then it's not AA. Which doesn't mean it's no good. It just means that it's not the AA program. So you need an Owner's Manual; a Big Book. Then you'll be able to read it and know what's in there, rather than count on someone else to tell you. - Ken D
bluidkiti
07-26-2015, 06:49 AM
July 27
Daily Reflections
GIVING FREELY
We will make every personal sacrifice necessary to insure the unity of
Alcoholics Anonymous. We will do this because we have learned to
love God and one another.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 234
To be self-supporting through my own contributions was never a
strong characteristic during my days as a practicing alcoholic. The
giving of time or money always demanded a price tag.
As a newcomer I was told "we have to give it away in order to keep
it." As I began to adopt the principals of Alcoholics Anonymous in my
life, I soon found it was a privilege to give to the Fellowship as an
expression of the gratitude felt in my heart. My love of God and of
others became the motivating factor in my life, with no thought of
return. I realize now that giving freely is God's way of expressing Himself
through me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
To paraphrase the psalm: "We alcoholics declare the power of liquor
and drunkenness showeth its handiwork. Day unto day uttereth
hangovers and night unto night showeth suffering. The law of A.A. is
perfect, converting the drunk. The testimony of A.A. is sure, making
wise the simple. The statutes of A.A. are right, rejoicing the heart.
The program of A.A. is pure, enlightening the eyes. The fear of the
first drink is clean, enduring forever." Have I any doubt about the
power of liquor?
Meditation For The Day
"Walk humbly with thy Lord." Walking with God means practicing the
presence of God in your daily affairs. It means asking God for
strength to face each new day. It means turning to Him often during
the day in prayer for yourself and for other people. It means thanking
Him at night for the blessings you have received during the day.
Nothing can seriously upset you if you are "walking with God." You
can believe that He is beside you in spirit, to help you and to guide you
on your way.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to walk humbly with God. I pray that I may turn
to Him often as to a close friend.
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As Bill Sees It
Reason--a Bridge to Faith, p. 208
We were squarely confronted with the question of faith. We couldn't
duck the issue. Some of us had already walked along the bridge of
reason toward the desired shore of faith, where friendly hands
stretched out in welcome. We were grateful that reason had brought
us so far. Perhaps we had been relying too heavily on reason that last
mile, and we did not like to lose our support.
Yet, without knowing it, had we not been brought to where we stood
by a certain kind of faith? For did we not believe in our own
reasoning? Did we not have confidence in our ability to think? What
was that but a sort of faith? Yes, we had been faithful to the god of
reason. So, in one way or another, we discovered that faith had been
involved all the time!
Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 53-54
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Walk In Dry Places
No tap dancing around problems.
Inventory
Our program calls for a "searching and fearless" moral inventory, not only in the beginning, but as we continue to follow our new way of life.
What this means is complete honesty about who and what we really are. We should not tap-dance around our problems in order to evade responsibility. This willnot bring the cleansing we need for real sober living. We need deep changes, not mere surface ones.
Difficult as it is to be fully honest, it's made easier when we remind ourselves that it's all for our own recovery. We benefit in proportion to the amount of honesty we bring to our inventory. If it's searching and fearless, the results will be far-reaching and substantial.
I will not shirk from facing the truth about myself as I go through the day. What I need for self-improvement will be revealed to me.
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Keep It Simple
To enjoy freedom, we have to con troll ourselves. Virginia Woolf
Freedom is a funny thing, in a way, it makes life harder. We are free to do what we want but every choice makes a difference in our lives. Some choices make us happy and some bring trouble.
We can make good choices. We can control our actions. We can start by having control in little ways: follow the law, pay the rent, and make the bed every day. These choices put order in our lives. Eat right, exercise, and get enough sleep. These choices make us strong enough to live each day to the fullest.
These kinds of choices set us free.
Prayer for the day: Higher Power, I was drinking and drugging. I couldn't enjoy my freedom. I had no control over the little things in my life. Help me stay sober today.
Action for the day: Today, I'll be grateful for having some control. I will list five way I am more free because I can control my actions.
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Each Day a New Beginning
To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it. --Mother Teresa
Our spiritual nature must be nurtured. Prayer and meditation lovingly kindle the flame that guides us from within. Because we're human, we often let the flame flicker and perhaps go out. And then we sense the dreaded aloneness. Fortunately, some time away, perhaps even a few moments in quiet communion with God, rekindles the flame.
For most of us, the flame burned low, or not at all, for many years. The flickering we may feel today, or tomorrow, or felt yesterday, will not last, so we may put away our fears. We can listen to the voice of our higher power in others. We can listen, too, as we carry the message. Prayer surrounds us every moment. We can fuel our inner flame with the messages received from others. We can let our spirit spring forth, let it warm our hearts and the hearts of others.
We each have a friend whose flame may be flickering today. I will help her and thus myself. A steady flame can rekindle one that's flickering.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If he is not interested in your solution, if he expects you to act only as a banker for his financial difficulties or a nurse for his sprees, you may have to drop him until he changes his mind. This he may do after he gets hurt some more.
p. 95
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
If you saw who I really was, you would turn away in disgust or use my many weaknesses to destroy me. One way or the other I was convinced I'd be hurt. I couldn't allow that to happen, so I kept the real me veiled behind a force field of rough-edged attitude. How I got to this place is still a mystery to me.
p. 309
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
Perhaps, though, your relation to him is such that you would care to reveal only a part of your story. If this is the situation, by all means do so, for you ought to make a beginning as soon as you can. It may turn out, however, that you'll choose someone else for the more difficult and deeper revelations. This individual may be entirely outside of A.A.--for example, your clergyman or your doctor. For some of us, a complete stranger may prove the best bet.
p. 61
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Today, I will focus on practicing one recovery behavior on one of my
issues, trusting that this practice will move me forward. I will
remember that acceptance, gratitude, and detachment are a good
place to begin.
--Melody Beattie
"God gives us abundance in all things, that we might use it on behalf of
the healing of the world."
--Marianne Williamson
"We find comfort among those who agree with us - growth among
those who don't."
--Frank A. Clark
"The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I
can change."
--Carl Rogers
He that gives should never remember, he that receives should never
forget.
--Talmud
"With every prayer and every thought of love, we release the light
that will cast out darkness. One light alone seems small and weak, but
no one's light is ever alone, for all our lights are part of God."
--Marianne Williamson
All time spent angry is time lost being happy.
-- Mexican Proverb
Progress comes from caring more about what needs to be done than
about who gets the credit.
--Dorothy Height
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
IDEAS
"Ideas shape the course of history."
--John Maynard Keynes
I get so excited about my sobriety because it has given me ideas.
Today I can think, ponder and create. God is such a big idea today --
every thing is involved.
For years I had made God a prisoner of the Church or an idea in
history, but in my sobriety I have discovered Him in art, poetry, music
and literature. God is found in friendship, advice, sharing and
sexuality. God is forcibly experienced in nature, sunsets, animals and
the sea.
God can be found through my failures. He is perceived in suffering,
loneliness and resentments. The acknowledgment of my disease has
brought me closer to God as I understand Him.
My idea of God is alive and it makes me want to live.
May my ideas and thoughts always reflect Your beauty.
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"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
James 1:2-4
"You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with
joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand."
Psalms 16:11
"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my
heart and my portion forever."
Psalm 73:26
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Daily Inspiration
Talents are not just artistic. They include the talent for compassion, care and for bringing harmony to our environment. Lord, help me to say the right words when what I say can make a helpful difference.
If we look to God for guidance, we will not be weighed down by the circumstances of our life. Lord, free me from the worries that come to distract me and keep me focused on that which is important.
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NA Just For Today
We Do Recover
"After coming to NA, we found ourselves among a very special group of people who have suffered like us and found recovery. In their experiences, freely shared, we found hope for ourselves. If the program worked for them, it would work for us."
Basic Text, p.10
A newcomer walks into his or her first meeting, shaking and confused. People are milling about. Refreshments and literature are set out. The meeting starts after everyone has drifted over to their chairs and settled themselves in. After taking a bewildered glance at the odd assortment of folks in the room, the newcomer asks, "Why should I bet my life on this group? After all, they're just a bunch of addicts like me."
Though it may be true that not many of our members had much going for us when we got here, the newcomer soon learns that the way we are living today is what counts. Our meetings are filled with addicts whose lives have turned completely around. Against all odds, we are recovering. The newcomer can relate to where we've been and draw hope from where we are now. Today, every one of us has the opportunity to recover.
Yes, we can safely entrust our lives to our Higher Power and to Narcotics Anonymous. So long as we work the program, the payoff is certain: freedom from active addiction and a better way of life.
Just for today: The recovery I've found in Narcotics Anonymous is a sure thing. By basing my life on it, I know I will grow.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
In summer I am very glad
We children are so small,
For we can see a thousand things
That men can't see at all.
--Laurence Alma-Tadema
Out behind the house a little boy is turning over stepping-stones, which form the sidewalk. Underneath these stones he has discovered many different kinds of worms and bugs. They wiggle this way and that when their cover is removed. He is only four, but he is the only one in the family who has made this discovery.
In a child's eyes there are many wonderful things, which escape the attention of the adult world. In order to see them, we must often take the time to let those younger than us show the way. Even though we may have lost our own childlike view of the world, others can guide us and thereby enrich our lives. We have much to teach and share with each other, regardless of our ages.
What can I learn from one younger than me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
You cannot get it by taking thought; You cannot seek it by not taking thought. --Zenrin poem
We are transported into unfamiliar worlds in this program by ideas that sometimes confound our mind. In the spiritual realms we learn things we didn't learn anywhere else, and gradually they bring us peace. We can decide with our will to follow a spiritual direction, to turn our life and will over to the care of our God. We cannot control what God will do with them. When we learn that part of our problem was trying too hard, being too self sufficient, or being too controlling, our old ways tell us to try hard to control that. But then we are only doing more of the same old thing. We learn that after making our decision, our Higher Power takes over. Now it is possible to be released from our own trying, to move beyond our own efforts by falling into the caring hand of God.
I must give this program first priority in my life, remembering my spiritual progress comes as a gift, not as an achievement.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it. --Mother Teresa
Our spiritual nature must be nurtured. Prayer and meditation lovingly kindle the flame that guides us from within. Because we're human, we often let the flame flicker and perhaps go out. And then we sense the dreaded aloneness. Fortunately, some time away, perhaps even a few moments in quiet communion with God, rekindles the flame.
For most of us, the flame burned low, or not at all, for many years. The flickering we may feel today, or tomorrow, or felt yesterday, will not last, so we may put away our fears. We can listen to the voice of our higher power in others. We can listen, too, as we carry the message. Prayer surrounds us every moment. We can fuel our inner flame with the messages received from others. We can let our spirit spring forth, let it warm our hearts and the hearts of others.
We each have a friend whose flame may be flickering today. I will help her and thus myself. A steady flame can rekindle one that's flickering.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go
Stop trying so hard to control things. It is not our job to control people, outcomes, circumstances, and life. Maybe in the past we couldn't trust and let things happen. But we can now. The way life is unfolding is good. Let it unfold.
Stop trying so hard to do better, be better, and be more. Who we are and the way we do things is good enough for today.
Who we were and the way we did things yesterday was good enough for that day.
Ease up on ourselves. Let go. Stop trying so hard.
Today, I will let go. I will stop trying to control everything. I will stop trying to make myself be and do better, and I will let myself be.
Today I release all thoughts and feelings that cause me harm. I am learning to put all fears aside and come from the place of truth and love. The rewards of this freedom are far greater than the negative results of my fear. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Be Vulnerable with Yourself
As we go through our days, we meet many people. We learn it’s safe to be vulnerable with some, not so safe or wise to be vulnerable with others. But there is one person it’s always safe to be vulnerable with. Yourself.
Share your deepest secrets with yourself. Whether you rise early in the morning and write your thoughts in a journal or take a few moments throughout the day to bring your deepest secrets to consciousness, you need to be clear, straight, and honest with yourself. Harboring secrets, ducking, dodging, and hiding from the truth will slow you down. It will block the pathway to your heart. It can even stop you cold if you get enough secrets tucked away.
Take time each day to recognize what you think, what you feel. You don’t have to act. The sheer acts of recognition, honesty, and acceptance are all that are necessary to keep you moving, growing, going forward.
Be as vulnerable as you saflely can with those you meet along the way. But always be vulnerable with yourself.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say how it feels intuitively
The first time intuition clonked me over the head is a story I’ve told many times in my writing. I was in treatment for chemical dependency at the time; I needed a job to get out. I had searched the ads and applied for every opportunity I thought I deserved. No job was too small, meager, or humble to overlook in the application process. No one wanted to hire me. I looked for weeks, months, without success.
One day, I was at the end of my resources. I was waiting for a bus to take me back to the hospital, where the treatment center was located, when a small voice in my heart urged, Look behind you. I did. I was standing in front of a bank. Next to it was a stairway leading to an attorney’s office, on the second floor.
Go upstairs and ask to talk to the head of the law firm. Tell him you want a job, were the words I heard next.
That’s crazy, I though. It doesn’t make any sense. But I did it anyway. That still, small voice kept urging me on. When I talked to the attorney, I told him where I lived and what was going on in my life. He said he understood; someone in his family had experienced problems with chemical dependency,too. Then he looked at me and said, “It’s funny you came in. I was thinking about creating a new position for a legal secretary in my office, but I haven’t gotten around to advertising yet.”
Two weeks later, he called me. I got the job. It was better than any I had applied for, it paid more, and it made the best possible use of the skills I possessed at that time.
We all have a special source of wisdom and guidance available to us, in times of trouble and in the day-to-day workings of our lives.
When faced with a dilemma, take a moment. Feel out the situation. Get out of your head. Make at least one decision intuitivley today.
God, help me trust my intuitive powers.
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In God’s Care
True happiness, we are told, consists in getting out of one’s self, but the point is not only to get out – you must stay out; and to stay out you must have some absorbing errand.
~~Henry James
When we are down, when everything seems to be going wrong for us, that’s when we probably notice that for some time our attention has been on ourselves. We may be concentrating on what we want and how we’re not getting it. We might be thinking of all the ways we have been slighted or ignored or rejected, and be keeping score.
It’s trite to say that we can get out of this painful self-absorption only by helping someone else, but it’s true. Helping others is a way to help ourselves. It is a spiritual principle, and our program is based on this principle of love for one another.
I will remember that happiness may be found in getting out of myself.
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Day By Day
Making progress
As addicts, we have a disease, as recovering addicts it is important for us to recognize that we are getting better. It is exciting and encouraging to see how we are changing.
We are sick, but we are getting better. For example, it used to be that every time something went wrong, we had to run; now we just want to run. The running feeling is still there, but we now have a choice. Later, by the grace of God, we may not even want to run.
Can I see the progress I am making?
Higher Power, while I know there is always room for improvement, help me see the progress I have already made.
I will seek to improve myself today by…
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Food for Thought
OA Unity
When we come into OA, we are amazed to find so many other people with the same problems and difficulties. We are even more amazed at the stories we hear of the successful solution of these problems, which have defeated us for so long.
We are united in our common illness – compulsive overeating – and we are united in our common program of recovery – abstinence and the Twelve Steps. What we could not accomplish alone, by our own efforts, becomes possible through the strength of the group and the Higher Power.
Each of us is responsible for the life of OA. We each have a role to play and an area in which to serve. If we do not do our part, the organization as a whole is weakened. By our service to the common goals, our own program is strengthened. “Letting someone else do it” will not work. Saying yes when there is a job that I can do is what maintains OA unity and my own recovery.
May I contribute to OA unity.
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Compulsive Apologies
The Feeling Underneath by Madisyn Taylor
Apologizing chronically can be a sign that you are not feeling that you have much self worth.
Many people suffer with the tendency to apologize all the time, chronically, for everything. On the one hand, apologizing is a social convention that keeps interactions between people polite, and in that way it can be very helpful. On the other hand, if we find ourselves apologizing for everything, it might be time to look at why we feel compelled to say “I’m sorry” so often. Ultimately, saying you’re sorry is saying that you are responsible for something that has gone wrong in the situation. Whether it’s negotiating a parking spot, moving through the aisles of the supermarket, or reaching for what you want, there are times when sorry is the right thing to say. But there are other times when “excuse me” is more accurate.
Sometimes saying you’re sorry is like saying that the other person in the equation has more of a right to be here than you do. Of course, it’s true that using the word sorry can simply be an innocuous way of defusing tension. However, if you find that you say sorry all the time, you might want to look a little deeper and see where in your psyche that might be coming from. If it’s a pattern, breaking it may simply take some awareness and practice.
The first step is observing yourself each time you say it, without being hard on yourself about it. Throughout your day simply notice when you apologize. At first, you might be surprised to see that you do it even more than you first realized. After a day or two of simply observing, try to tune in to what it is you are feeling right before you say it. You might be feeling threatened, embarrassed, intensely anxious, or a variety of other feelings. Over time, try to stop yourself before the words come out and just be with the feeling that’s there. You may recognize it as one from your childhood, one that’s been with you for a long time. The more you are able to see it, the freer you will be not to be sorry all the time. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Over and over, I see that those who make the best and steadiest progress in The Program are those who readily accept the help of a Higher Power. Once they can do that, it’s easier for them to get out of their own way. Their problems then seem to resolve themselves in a way that is beyond human understanding. Do I realize that the effectiveness with which I use the consciousness of God in my daily life depends not on Him, but on me?
Today I Pray
May I know that my recovery and growth depends on my being in touch with my Higher Power, not just once in a while, but always. It means turning to that Power several times a day to ask for strength and knowledge of his will. When I understand that my own life is part of a Higher Plan, I will be less apt to trip and fall, head off in the wrong direction, or just to sit tight and let life pass me by.
Today I Will Remember
to be God-conscious.
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One More Day
One of the signs of maturity is a healthy respect for reality — a respect that manifests its4elf in the level of one’s aspirations and in the accuracy of one’s assessment of the difficulties which separate the facts of today from the bright hopes of tomorrow.
– Robert H. Davies
If we don’t want to live our lives caught in the “what might have been” doldrums, we can assess where we are and how we happen to be here. We can stop feeling regretful about lost t9ime and concentrate on the possibilities now.
If we haven’t achieved any of the goals we previously set for ourselves, we can make new goals and achieve each of them one step at a time. We have the rest of our lives to live, and we can realistically shape new goals that are both challenging and reachable.
I will set realistic goals, realizing there is never a better time than now.
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One Day At A Time
FOOTWORK
"I've lost so much weight
that I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."
Erma Bombeck
I have lost and gained the same weight so many times I've lost count. Lack of willpower was never an issue with me. I've whipped myself into shape many times. There was nothing I didn't do in order to lose weight. I just couldn’t keep it off.
The tide finally turned for me when I quit relying on my own power, turned my focus away from my weight problem and toward "trusting in God and cleaning house," as the Big Book states.
I did Step work under the guidance of my sponsor. I passed along to others the lessons I'd learned. I did service work. I kept practicing a conscious contact with the God of my understanding. I went to meetings and talked to others. I kept a journal. Then one day I looked up from the tasks at hand to discover I was abstinent. God did for me what I couldn't do for myself.
One day at a time...
I will do the footwork and leave the results up to God.
~ Shirley G.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
These observations would be academic and pointless if our friend never took the first drink, thereby setting the terrible cycle in motion. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body. If you ask him why he started on that last bender, the chances are he will offer you any one of a hundred alibis. Sometimes these excuses have a certain plausibility, but none of them really makes sense in the light of the havoc an alcoholic's drinking bout creates. They sound like the philosophy of the man who, having a headache, beats himself on the head with a hammer so that he can't feel the ache. If you draw this fallacious reasoning to the attention of an alcoholic, he will laugh it off, or become irritated and refuse to talk.
Once in a while he may tell the truth. And the truth, strange to say, is usually that he has no more idea why he took that first drink than you have. Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied part of the time. But in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. Once this malady has a real hold, they are a baffled lot. There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game. But they often suspect they are down for the count. - Pg. 23 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Mind is the path. Flesh is the vehicle. We must establish a new mind through the creative power of thought using the 12 steps. We must establish a new body, protecting it from drugs. Only then do we become an aspirant of a whole life.
I ask my Creator to make me WHOLE in body, mind, and spirit.
Spirit Calls
Spirit calls to me within and without. In a still, small voice I sense spirit whispering in my inner ear. My body feels an increasing sense of aliveness as I invite spirit to make itself known to me. I do not even need to make room for spirit, because spirit breathes in each pore within me. It fills the numbness with energy. It fills the emptiness and causes my cup to overflow with its presence. There are gifts in listening if I am willing to sense, hear and see them, lessons I can learn. Little hints that help me to appreciate what I already have and open myself to experiencing more.
I will look for evidence of spirit at work in my life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Unity in our program does not mean conformity. Unity means joining for a common purpose, despite our differences.
I can disagree without being disagreeable.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
With the 12 Steps, you have break throughs, not break downs.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I release all thoughts and feelings that cause me harm. I am learning to put all fears aside and come from the place of truth and love. The rewards of this freedom are far greater than the negative results of my fear.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I left my bathroom door open when I puked but I closed it when I prayed. - Sean A.
bluidkiti
07-27-2015, 10:22 AM
July 28
Daily Reflections
THOSE WHO STILL SUFFER
Let us resist the proud assumption that since God has enabled us to do
well in one area we are destined to be a channel of saving grace for
everybody.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 232
A.A. groups exist to help alcoholics achieve sobriety. Large or small,
firmly established or brand-new, speaker, discussion or study group
has but one reason for being: to carry the message to the
still-suffering alcoholic. The group exists so that the alcoholic can find
a new way of life, a life abundant in happiness, joy, and freedom. To
recover, most alcoholics need the support of a group of other
alcoholics who share their experience, strength and hope. Thus my
sobriety, and our program's survival, depend on my determination to
put first things first.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
To continue the paraphrase of the psalm: "The judgments of the
Twelve Steps are true and righteous altogether. More to be desired
are they than whiskey, yea, than much fine whiskey, sweeter also than
wine. Moreover, by them are alcoholics warned and in keeping of them
there is great reward. Who can understand our alcoholism? Cleanse us
from secret faults. Keep us from presumptuous resentments. Let them
not have dominion over us. Then shall we be upright and free of the
great transgression." Am I resolved that liquor will never again have
dominion over me?
Meditation For The Day
God can be your shield. Then no problems of the world can harm you.
Between you and all scorn and indignity from others is your trust in
God, like a shining shield. Nothing can then have the power to spoil
your inward peace. With this shield, you can attain this inward peace
quickly, in your surroundings as well as in your heart. With this inward
peace, you do not need to resent the person who troubles you. Instead,
you can overcome the resentment in your own mind which may have
been aroused by that person.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may strive for inward peace. I pray that I may not be
seriously upset, no matter what happens around me.
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As Bill Sees It
Never the Same Again, p. 209
It was discovered that when one alcoholic had planted in the mind of
another the true nature of his malady, that person could never be the
same again. Following every spree, he would have to say to himself,
"Maybe those A.A.'s were right." After a few such experiences,
often before the onset of extreme difficulties, he would return to us
convinced.
********************************
In the first years, those of us who sobered up in A.A. had been grim
and utterly hopeless cases. But then we began to have success with
milder alcoholics and even some potential alcoholics. Younger folks
appeared. Lots of people turned up who still had jobs, homes, health,
and even good social standing.
Of course, it was necessary for these newcomers to hit bottom
emotionally. But they did not have to hit every possible bottom in
order to admit that they were licked.
1. 12 & 12, p. 23-24
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 199
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Walk In Dry Places
The True Security
Security
We can feel insecure for many reasons, but the fundamental reason is that we do not have a firm anchorage in our Higher Power. This anchorage must be our true security, and it is really the only form that can survive any attack.
Regardless of who we are, we can know and feel that our Higher Power is guiding and directing us at all times. If we find ourselves being threatened by a person or situation, we can deal with it by knowing that our Higher Power is in charge of all outcomes. If we envy somebody, we must get back to an acknowledgment of God as the source of everything.
If we feel inadequate around people who seem to be immensely self-confident and secure, we should not try to imitate their manner and behavior. Rather, we should simply put our trust in our own Higher Power, and our feeling of true security will express itself in proper ways.
All the things we view today as being secure are probably only temporary. Our ture security can come only from God.
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Keep It Simple
The best leaders are those who know how to follow.---Anonymous
Am I a leader or a follower? The fact is, I am responsible for where I end up. If I choose to be a follower, I'd better follow leaders who know where they are going. And I had better know where they're going.
If I choose to be leader, I'd better know that I'm responsible for getting myself on the right path. I also must be honest with my followers, so they can make good choices. I'm not responsible for my followers choices, but I must give them the truth. Being a leader doesn't always mean that I know where I'll end up. But it can mean that I know I'm on the right path, following the lead from my Higher Power---one step at a time.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me the faith and courage to choose good leaders to follow. When it is Your will, help me be a good leader.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list my leaders. They might be a Higher Power, a sponsor, or a friend. I'll think of why I choose to follow these leaders.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The beauty of loving someone is the feeling of "wholeness" that I experience. The need for that individual in my life, the "I'm part of you and you're part of me" feeling that connects two people and makes them necessary to each other. --Kathleen Andrus
All that is asked of us by our Creator is that we love one another. Where love doesn't flow easily, perhaps we can just decide to not hurt someone. If we each avoided hurting all people, for just one day, lives would be transformed. We'd each see the world with a fresh perspective.
The more we love others, any others, the deeper our love will grow for all others. Loving lifts our hearts and lightens our burdens. Every day's tribulations can become triumphs when we carry love in our hearts. Love fills us up, and the more we share it, the fuller we become.
We are connected--each of us to one another, all of us together. Our contributions to the whole are necessary. Its completion is made perfect by our presence.
As I pass a friend today, I will be grateful for her contribution to my wholeness, too.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within.
p. 95
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
I grew up in a loving middle-class home. We had our problems--what family doesn't? But there was no abuse, verbal or physical, and it certainly couldn't be said my parents didn't do the best they could by me. My grandfathers were alcoholic, and I was raised on stories of how it had ravaged their lives and the lives of those around them. Nope, I didn't want to be an alcoholic.
p. 309
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to confide and your full confidence in the one with whom you share your first accurate self-survey. Even when you've found the person, it frequently takes great resolution to approach him or her. No one ought to say the A.A. program requires no willpower; here is one place you may require all you've got. Happily, though, the chances are that you will be in for a very pleasant surprise. When your mission is carefully explained, and it is seen by the recipient of your confidence how helpful he can really be, the conversation will start easily and will soon become eager. Before long, your listener may well tell a story or two about himself which will place you even more at ease. Provided you hold back nothing, your sense of relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquillity takes its place. And when humility and serenity are so combined, something else of great moment is apt to occur. Many an A.A., once agnostic or atheistic, tells us that it was during this stage of Step Five that he first actually felt the presence of God. And even those who had faith already often become conscious of God as they never were before.
pp. 61-62
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Spirit has placed a dream in your heart for a better world, starting
with your family, extending to your work, community, country and
stretching beyond your nation. Speak your truth and inspire others, for
you are meant to make a significant and sizable difference.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Guidance isn't being told which action to take or not to take.
Guidance is God's gift of peace - from which we proceed. The peace
dissolves the question, and we simply do what we do in peace."
--Hugh Prather, Spiritual Notes to Myself
Today, I will ask my Higher Power for what I want and need. I will not
demand -- I will ask. Then I will let go.
--Melody Beattie
Spiritual community is created when we come together on a regular
basis with a common intention: to extend love beyond our immediate
families. Through this shared affinity, we encourage, challenge and
remind one another that nothing is impossible.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
Be gentle with yourself. Don't force it. But don't run away from your
feelings, either. You might feel like cooked spaghetti for a while,
but what's really softening up is your heart. God, help me face and
feel any feelings.
--Melody Beattie
Blessed are they that have not seen and yet have believed.
--American Proverb
"Know that every struggle holds a blessing. Uncover the blessing and
say thanks."
--Unknown
If you want your life to be a magnificent story, then begin by realizing
that you are the author and everyday you have the opportunity to
write a new page.
--Mark Houlahan
To love is to be patient, thoughtful, kind and meek. Lord, increase my
ability to love so that I can see You working in my life.
--unknown
"Love is not blind - It sees more, not less. But because it sees more, It
is willing to see less."
--Julius Gordon
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SIMILARITY
"Whatever you may be sure of,
be sure of this -- that you are
dreadfully like other people."
--James Russell Lowell
For many years I saw the differences and not the similarities. I was
always considering how I was unlike other alcoholics, rather than
perceiving the striking similarities. I kept myself on the outside, not
only in recovery from alcoholism but also in life.
Then I heard from another recovering alcoholic not only "my story"
but also my feelings. I belonged. I was with people who knew my
loneliness, isolation, confusion, guilt and despair. I had come home to
live amongst my people.
Thank You for enabling me to see that I am a member of the human
family and a recovering alcoholic.
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"But Jesus called the children to him and said, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.'"
Luke 18:16
"Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see
your good works and glorify your Father which is in heaven."
Matthew 5:16
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Daily Inspiration
Patience with others brings peace to our own soul. Lord, help me to display patience even when I do not feel patient because everyone will benefit, but me most of all.
Jesus said, "Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.". Lord, I pray, I believe, and I thank you even before it is fulfilled.
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NA Just For Today
Secrets And Intimacy
"We feared that if we ever revealed ourselves as we were, we would surely be rejected."
Basic Text, p.31
Having relationships without barriers, ones in which we can be entirely open with our feelings, is something many of us desire. At the same time, the possibility of such intimacy causes us more fear than almost any other situation in life.
If we examine what frightens us, we'll usually find that we are attempting to hide an aspect of our personalities that we are ashamed of, an aspect we sometimes haven't even admitted to ourselves. We don't want others to know of our insecurities, our pain, or our neediness, so we simply refuse to expose them. We may imagine that if no one knows about our imperfections, those imperfections will cease to exist.
This is the point where our relationships stop. Anyone who enters our lives will not get past the point at which our secrets begin. To maintain intimacy in a relationship, it is essential that we acknowledge our defects and accept them. When we do, the fortress of denial, erected to keep these things hidden, will come crashing down, enabling us to build up our relationships with others.
Just for today: I have opportunities to share my inner self. I will take advantage of those opportunities and draw closer to those I love.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
One law for lion and ox is oppression. --William Blake
What would the forest be like if deer, squirrel, and owl alike were required to sleep only at noon? Or the sky, if all birds were forced by law to fly in lines? Or the sea, if all fish had to stay forever in schools? We all know a lion and an ox, and we've all acted like a chicken, jackass, goat, or fox. Now and then we're slow or fast, bright or dull, willing or not.
So when others go the way we know we must go, we will follow the same law. But we don't have to be as others are, just to avoid being thought "strange." How truly strange life would be if everyone were the same. We have our own way, our own good time, and own free laws to discover and obey.
Will I need to obey someone else's rules if I govern myself well?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I am ill because my mind is in a rut and refuses to leave. --Karen Giordino
We are vulnerable human beings. We are susceptible to accidents and disease, and we can get bogged down in unhealthy thinking. We aren't at fault when we catch a cold or get a more serious illness, and accidents can happen to anyone. In the same way our addictions and the addictions of people we are close to are not our fault. We never asked for these afflictions, yet we must deal with them.
Physical and spiritual health can't be separated. A thriving spiritual life creates an environment for physical healing and strength. In the same way, physical well-being infuses our spirit with hope and joy. Human beings cannot go through life without sometimes being ill in either mind or body. Living by this program helps make us healthier in all ways. When we are bogged down, we can turn to one of the Steps as a means of healing and release.
Today, I will remember that lama whole man, with body and spirit as one. As I turn to the Steps, my whole being is healed.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The beauty of loving someone is the feeling of "wholeness" that I experience. The need for that individual in my life, the "I'm part of you and you're part of me" feeling that connects two people and makes them necessary to each other. --Kathleen Andrus
All that is asked of us by our Creator is that we love one another. Where love doesn't flow easily, perhaps we can just decide to not hurt someone. If we each avoided hurting all people, for just one day, lives would be transformed. We'd each see the world with a fresh perspective.
The more we love others, any others, the deeper our love will grow for all others. Loving lifts our hearts and lightens our burdens. Every day's tribulations can become triumphs when we carry love in our hearts. Love fills us up, and the more we share it, the fuller we become.
We are connected--each of us to one another, all of us together. Our contributions to the whole are necessary. Its completion is made perfect by our presence.
As I pass a friend today, I will be grateful for her contribution to my wholeness, too.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Fear
One day, I decided to try something new. I took my ten year old son out on the St. Croix River on a Waverunner. A Waverunner is a small boating vehicle resembling a motorcycle.
We donned life jackets and embarked on an experience that turned out to be both exhilarating and frightening; exhilarating when I let myself enjoy it; frightening when I thought too much about what I was doing and all the terrible things that could happen.
Midway though our ride, my worst fear came true. We took a spill. We were floundering in thirty feet of water. The Waverunner was bobbing on the waves in front of me, like a motorized turtle on it back.
"Don't panic," my son said calmly.
"What if we drown?" I objected.
"We can't," he said. "We have life jackets on. See! We're floating."
"The machine is upside down," I said. "How are we going to turn it over?"
"Just like the man said," my son answered. "The arrow points this way."
With an easy gesture, we turned the machine right side up. "What if we can't climb back on?" I asked.
"We can," my son replied. "That's what Waverunners were made for: climbing on in the water."
I relaxed and as we drove off, I wondered why I had become so frightened. I thought maybe it's because I don't trust my ability to solve problems. Maybe it's because once I almost drowned when I wasn't wearing a life jacket.
But you didn't drown then either; a small voice inside reassured me. You survived.
Don't panic.
Problems were made to be solved. Life was made to be lived. Although sometimes we may be in over our heads - yes, we may even go under for a few moments and gulp a few mouthfuls of water, we won't drown. We're wearing - and always have been wearing - a life jacket. That support jacket is called "God."
Today, I will remember to take care of myself. When I get in over my head, God is there supporting me - even when my fears try to make me forget.
It is exciting to know that I am at choice today and that my choices are limitless. I can choose exactly what I want to do to change how I am feeling. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Acknowledge Your Fears
I never knew how afraid I was. Maybe I was even too afraid to look at my fears.
People speak of facing fear of not being afraid of fear, of working through fear. How do we do that? Try this technique, recommended to me by a healing professional. Take out a sheet of paper and pencil, and write down everything you fear. Take as much time as you need. Let it roll out. Don’t be afraid of what you see. Some of your fears may be of the unknown. Write as much as you can about those,too.
We don’t need to list everything we need to do about each fear. All we need to do is acknowledge, honestly, what we fear. Once we do, the way will become clear. Acknowledging our fears will give us power. Acknowledging our fears will help set us free. Often, it moves us to the next place. It is the barrier we need to pass through.
Although some of our fears may be real, may be grounded in reality, facing them won’t make us more afraid. Facing our fears will bring us peace and power. The truth isn’t the enemy. Fear of the truth is the enemy.
Be gentle with yourself. Let yourself have your fears, and let yourself face them.
Having the wisdom to face the truth will bring us closer to peace.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Turn the switch on
Many of us have turned off our intuition switch, our sense of knowing the truth. We may have turned it off when were children, because our parents lied to us. Or we may have turned the switch off later on in life to be in relationship to people who were lying to themselves and us. Our inner voice, our sense of knowing the truth, had to be turned off in order for us to remain in the situation.
It is time to turn the intuition switch back on. Go into your circuit-breaker room and turn it on. You know and can feel it when somebody is lying to you. You may not know it right away, but you can tell before long. You know if you trust or mistrust somebody. And you probably know the truth right now about how you feel.
Can you trust yourself? Stop doubting. Begin trusting and listening to what you know is the truth.
You know when a thing feels right to you, and you know when it doesn’t. The problem isn’t that your intuition doesn’t work. The problem is that sometimes you choose to ignore it.
God, help me listen when you speak. Help me trust the radar you’ve built into me.
Activity: This is a meditation to help you activate your intuitive powers. Get yourself in a relaxed position, either sitting in a comfortable chair or lying on a couch. Spend a few minutes consciously relaxing your entire body, starting with your head, your face, then moving downward to your toes. Then picture yourself at the bottom of a staircase, standing in front of a door with your name on it. Open the door and go into the room. In this room are a lot of switches, similar to a circuit-breaker room. Look for the switch marked “Intuition.” See yourself going over to the switch, then turning it on. If it needs any repairs, see yourself making those repairs. If you’re having difficulty turning it on, ask what the problem is, what you need to clear up before you can turn it on. Once the switch is turned on, leave the room. Lock the door behind you; then walk back up the stairs and slowly move back into awareness. Whenever your intuition falters, check the switch in your switch room to make certain your switch is on.
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In God’s Care
When you betray sombody else, you also betray yourself.
~~Isaac Bashevis Singer
Any action or expression we make toward another comes back to us. Maybe not today, but it assuredly returns: we do sow what we reap. If we treat others hatefully, or with disdain and suspicion, we eventually get the same in return. And we can also have a love-filled, affirming life if we willingly, gladly, and honestly offer our love to others with no conditions.
We can bring ourselves misery or happiness through our actions. With the help of our Higher Power, we can sow only what we want to reap. It’s a small decision to turn within for guidance. Although it takes practice to remember to let our Higher Power direct our actions, it will become a habit in time – the healthiest habit we’ll ever develop.
I will experience what I give to others through my actions today.
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Day By Day
Testing the fellowship
Early in recovery, we may find ourselves testing the fellowship to see how much others will respond to us. Out of fear, anxiety, loneliness, or frustration, we may act out. But as wonderful as our fellowship is, it’s not a permanent bond; it will not hold up against repeated assaults and excessive demands.
When fellowship members have had enough, they may frankly object. We may feel hurt and rejected. If we then overreact and reject the fellowship, we lose. And so does the fellowship. We need to learn what issues we have along with chemical dependency and how to deal with them. We need to learn that the fellowship needs the care and respect we’d give any relationship.
Am I treating the fellowship and myself well?
Higher Power, help me understand my individual issue and to get help with them.
Today I will show respect for myself and the fellowship by…
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Food for Thought
God Cares
It may be hard to believe that the Power of the universe is concerned with everything we do, including how and what we eat. The awareness that God does indeed care about the minute details of our daily existence comes to us as we see evidence of that care. When we turn to Him and trust His support, we see that our lives go more smoothly.
When we are relying on our Higher Power for the little things as well as the big ones, our timing improves. We are at the right place at the right time. We do not waste energy trying to do what we are not meant to do. The way opens up in front of us and we pass through difficulties unscathed.
We can believe that God is concerned with our recovery from compulsive overeating. He is health and wholeness, and we are made in His image. All that prevents us from receiving His healing care is our ignorance and self-will. Through this program we learn how to accept God’s care.
We are grateful for the knowledge that You care.
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As Blessed as You Want to Be
The Power of Staying Positive
Positive thinking dramatically increases your chances of success in any endeavor.
Our thoughts are not simply ethereal pieces of information that enter our minds and then disappear. The words and ideas that we think can shape our lives and drive us toward success and happiness or failure and distress. How you think and feel can have a profound effect on your ability to recognize opportunity, how well you perform, and the outcome of the goals that you’ve set for yourself. When you maintain an optimistic outlook and make an effort to harbor only positive thoughts, you begin to create the circumstances conducive to you achieving what you desire. You feel in control and few of life’s challenges seem truly overwhelming because it is in your nature to expect a positive conclusion. An optimistic mind is also an honest one. Staying positive does not mean that you ignore difficulties or disregard limitations. Instead, it means spending time focusing only on the thoughts that are conducive to your well-being and progress.
Positive thinking dramatically increases your chances of success in any endeavor. When you’re sure that you are worthy and that achievement is within your grasp, you start to relax and look for solutions rather than dwelling on problems. You are more likely to imagine positive situations or outcomes and disregard the thoughts related to giving up, failure, or roadblocks. What the mind expects, it finds. If you anticipate joy, good health, happiness, and accomplishment, then you will experience each one. Thinking positively may sound like a simple shift in attention – and it is – but it is a mind-set that must be developed. Whenever a negative thought enters your mind, try immediately replacing it with a constructive or optimistic one. With persistence, you can condition your mind to judge fleeting, self-defeating thoughts as inconsequential and dismiss them.
It is within your power to become as happy, content, or successful as you make up your mind to be. Staying positive may not have an immediate effect on your situation, but it will likely have a profound and instantaneous effect on your mood and the quality of your experiences. In order for positive thinking to change your life, it must become your predominant mind-set. Once you are committed to embracing positive thinking, you’ll start believing that everything that you want is within your grasp. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We learn the value of mediation in The Program. As the beginning of the Eleventh Step suggest, we see through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as We understand Him. One of the great values of meditation is that it clears the mind. And as the mind becomes clearer, it becomes more capable and willing to acknowledge the truth. less pain is required to force honesty recognition of defects and their results. The real need of the whole person are revealed. Are prayer and meditation a regular part of my daily living?
Today I Pray
May God’s truth be revealed to me through meditation and these small prayers, through contact with my group which keeps me mindful of my need to clear my mind with daily meditation. For only an uncluttered mind can receive God; only a mind cleansed of self-interest can acknowledge the truth.
Today I Will Remember
.Meditation is a mind-cleanser
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One More Day
Life is not a “brief candle.” It is a splendid torch that I want to make burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.
– George Bernard Shaw
How lucky we are to have the splendid torch of our lives shining on our days. Some may think that a health problem is going to become a permanent barrier to our ability to enjoy life.
If we assume that each one of our “small candles” represents another of our strengths, we can blend them together to form a torch of hope. How we live the rest of our lives — forty months or forty years — is entirely our own making. Let the torch shine!
The possibilities of my life are endless when I am willing to see them and act on them.
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One Day At A Time
EXAMPLES
“Preach always ... use words if necessary.”
St. Francis of Assisi
I've heard it said many times that the Twelve Step way of life is a way of attraction, not promotion. I can project an image of serenity and recovery by the way I conduct my life. By using the Twelve Steps to work on my inventory, by promptly making amends when needed, by striving daily to use the tools of recovery, I am assuring compulsive eaters who are living in chaos and confusion that there is a better way. When they ask my "secret," I can then share the words of recovery.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will preach recovery
by the examples of serenity and peace.
~ Hopeful
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When ready, we say something like this: 'My Creator; I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows. Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding, Amen.' We have then completed STEP SEVEN. - Pg. 76 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We are the inheritors of those who have gone before us, the originators of the 12 step and other recovery programs. Their blood, sweat, tears, and persistence is a gift to us today. Their sheer tenacity in educating the public, the government, the medical profession, and most of all themselves is our great legacy.
God, as I understand You, may I carry out the legacy one principle at a time, one day at a time, one hour at a time.
Visualizing My Own Life
Today I will dream, I'll use my capacity for visualization to imagine what I would like my life to be like. I will allow myself to see, in my mind, what I want to manifest in my life. Then I'll let the universe to work it's magic. Rather than stress and control and attempt to manipulate events, circumstances and people so that they conform to my idea of what I want to happen, I'll hold my vision steadily and with faith and trust that the universe will provide. This life is a gift, this world is a gift. Nature is abundant. I am part of the world, part of nature. Life means to fulfill me. Today I will take all of the steps that I need to take in order to manifest my vision and let God do the rest. I'll take the action and let go of the result.
I see the life I want to live
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The Twelve Steps: One to Three: Clear up; Four to Nine: Clean up; Ten to Twelve: Contact up. These are also called the Foundation Steps, the Action Steps, and the Maintenance Steps respectively. Are you looking for something easier?
The easier, softer way is the Twelve Steps.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Slogans are the Swiss army knives of Recovery.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is exciting to know that I am at choice today and that my choices are limitless. I can choose exactly what I want to do to change how I am feeling.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I never came upon any of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking. - Albert Einstein.
bluidkiti
07-28-2015, 08:16 AM
July 29
Daily Reflections
ANONYMOUS GIFTS OF KINDNESS
As active alcoholics we were always looking for a handout in one way
or another.
"THE TWELVE TRADITIONS ILLUSTRATED," p. 14
The challenge of the Seventh Tradition is a personal challenge,
reminding me to share and give of myself. Before sobriety the only
thing I ever supported was my habit of drinking. Now my efforts are a
smile, a kind word, and kindness.
I saw that I had to start carrying my own weight and to allow my new
friends to walk with me because, through the practice of the Twelve
Steps and Twelve Traditions, I've never had it so good.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
There are two days in every week about which we should not worry,
two days that should be kept from fear and apprehension. One of
these days is yesterday, with its mistakes and cares, its faults and
blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond
our control. All the money in the world cannot bring back yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed. We cannot erase a single
word we said. Yesterday is gone beyond recall. Do I still worry about
what happened yesterday?
Meditation For The Day
"God will not suffer you to be tempted above what you are able, but
with the temptation He will also find a way of escape, that you may be
able to bear it." If you have enough faith and trust in God, He will give
you all the strength you need to face every temptation and to
overcome it. Nothing will prove too hard for you to bear. You can face
any situation. "Be of good cheer. I have overcome the world."
You can overcome any temptation with God's help. So fear nothing.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may face every situation without fear. I pray that nothing
will prove too hard for me to bear.
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As Bill Sees It
Out of Bondage, p.210
At Step Three, many of us said to our Maker, as we understand
Him: "God, I offer myself to Thee--to build with me and to do with
me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of bondage of self, that I may better
do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that my transcendence
over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy power, Thy
love, and Thy way of life. May I do Thy will always!"
We thought well before taking this Step, making sure we were
ready. Then we could commence to abandon ourselves utterly to
Him.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 63
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Walk In Dry Places
Flattery or Praise?
Human relations
Flattery and praise are social lubricants that serve human purposes. But flattery is merely manipulative, while genuine praise is beneficial to everybody.
Many of us with troubled back grounds also have trouble giving and accepting praise.Sometimes we mistake flattery for praise and use it either to manipulate otehs or allow ourselves to bemanipulated. Perhaps we're either too proud or too self-conscious to deal with real praise.
Another mistake is in believing that praise should be given out only sparingly, only after outstanding achievement. Not so, we need to give and receive praise continuously in order to reach higher levels of achievement. Knowing it's importance, we'll alsolearn howto avoid flattery.
I'll offer both verbal and silent praise today in my dealing with others. We'll all benefit from it.
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Keep It Simple
They have rights who dare defend them. ---Roger Baldwin
In recovery, we regain our right to have choices, our right to have honest relationships. Do we claim these rights, or do we let them go by?
Sometimes, standing up for our rights will mean going against the crowd. It will mean turning down that drink when everyone else has one. It will mean telling your honest opinion when it's different from the others think. Being sober will mean, at times being different. Lots of times, we find being different hard. We want to fit in. This is normal.
But we don't stand alone. We have friends who will stand with us during hard times. We have a Higher Power who will guide and comfort us. We are people with rights. Let's work hard so nothing takes away our rights.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, please help me keep and defend my dignity and human rights.
Action for the Day: I'll take time out to list the rights I've gotten back due to my recovery.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Harmony exists in difference no less than in likeness, if only the same keynote governs both parts. --Margaret Fuller
Harmony exists everywhere, as an entity of itself. Our personal attitudes bring the disharmony to a situation. An attitude of love can bless all situations and all people.
The converse is likewise true. We all desire harmony in our relationships. And we will find it, every time we bring an attitude of honest gratitude into a situation.
How we feel, today, about this person or that situation, reflects the strength of our relationship with God. When we experience life in the company of our higher power, we will let life flow. We will observe harmony, then, even in the midst of difference.
All of life's elements are moving toward a state of total and perfect harmony. We need not fear. We can trust the company of our higher power and know that every situation, no matter how adverse its appearance, is contributing to a harmonious outcome if we'd but lend a trusting attitude.
Harmony is everywhere. I will celebrate it. I will trust the present. I will trust the future.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If he thinks he can do the job in some other way, or prefers some other spiritual approach, encourage him to follow his own conscience. We have no monopoly on God; we merely have an approach that worked with us. But point out that we alcoholics have much in common and that you would like, in any case, to be friendly. Let it go at that.
p. 95
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
In my early teen years I began to be bothered by feelings that I didn't fit in. Until this point, I had ignored the fact that I wasn't one of the "in" crowd. I thought if I tried hard enough I would fit in sooner or later. At fourteen I stopped trying. I quickly discovered the soothing effects of a drink. Telling myself I would be more careful than my unfortunate grandparents, I set out to feel better.
pp. 309-310
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
This feeling of being at one with God and man, this emerging from isolation through the open and honest sharing of our terrible burden of guilt, brings us to a resting place where we may prepare ourselves for the following Steps toward a full and meaningful sobriety.
p. 62
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Today, I will remember that God has not abandoned me. I can trust
that God is leading, guiding, directing, and planning in love each detail
of my life.
--Melody Beattie
God, help me become fluent with my emotions. Help me learn to feel
whatever I feel, then regularly restore myself to that centered,
balanced place.
--Melody Beattie
Today I will be open to growing in my understanding of my Higher
Power. I will be open to letting go of old, limiting, negative beliefs
about God. No matter how I understand God, I will be grateful that
God understands me.
--Melody Beattie
A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes
your lips will not return.
--Jewish Proverb
Enjoy life, that's what God intended.
--unknown
Live life to the fullest and make the best of what today has to offer
without worry and fear of what tomorrow might bring.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
GOD-PLAYING
"I determine who is a Jew."
--Herman Goring
Playing God. How well I remember this attitude in my drinking days
when, because I had said it, it must be so! Arrogance and pride kept
me lonely and isolated.
Today my spiritual program teaches me to "play" God in a different
way. It requires that I seek to discover the values I associate with God
and live them out in my own life. Because I believe that God is loving
and accepting, I seek to reveal these qualities in my daily associations.
It makes no sense to worship a God of truth if I continue the life of
"the liar". Belief must determine change.
As a recovering alcoholic I seek to "play" God in the joy, acceptance
and love I show to myself and other people. However, I know (oh how
I know!) that I am not God!
Let my statements always be open to the "pure light" of change.
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A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good. The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. A fool spurns his father's discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence. The house of the righteous contains great treasure, but the income of the wicked brings them trouble.
Proverbs 15:1-6
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Daily Inspiration
Every decision that you make opens the door to many new opportunities and experiences. Lord, help me make the most of my opportunities because it is through them that I am able to grow.
A blessing is an explosion of joy from God that ripples through your heart and fills your mind with God's light and hope. Lord, help me speak the words of blessing when they are needed by someone who is lonely, or who is dying or who is depressed.
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NA Just For Today
Expectations
"As we realize our need to be forgiven, we tend to be more forgiving."
Basic Text, p.38
Our behavior toward other people in our life is a mirror of our behavior toward ourselves. When we demand perfection of ourselves, we come to demand it from others around us, too. As we strive to repair and heal our lives in recovery, we may also expect others to work just as hard and to recover at the same pace as we do. And just as we are often unforgiving of our own mistakes, we may shut out friends and family members when they don't meet our expectations.
Working the steps helps us understand our own limitations and our humanity. We come to see our failures as human mistakes. We realize that we will never be perfect, that we will, at times, disappoint ourselves and others. We hope for forgiveness.
As we learn to gently accept ourselves, we can start to view others with the same accepting and tolerant heart. These people, too, are only human, trying to do their best and sometimes falling short.
Just for today: I will treat others with the tolerance and forgiveness I seek for myself.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A good marriage is that in which each appoints the other guardian of his solitude. --Rainer Maria Rilke
Solitude is vital to our well being, but in a family it's hard sometimes to find the space and time to be alone. The house is often crowded with laughter, voices, the radio, and the TV. There are often many things going on at the same time.
It's true that our family is a team, and that we work together, whether we intend to or not, to create the environment we live in. If it's noisy, that's the way we live. Noise is life to some. The fact that others need our help or company is wonderful proof of our value. But if we can be guardians of each other's solitude, out of love for one another, we will each come back renewed, strengthened, and recreated. We can bring new life into our days when we are alone with God and ourselves.
How can I help someone find rest and renewal today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Change and growth take place when a person has risked himself and dares to become involved with experimenting with his own life. --Herbert Otto
The rewards of our new life are apparent to us because of how we feel, and apparent to others by what they can see. Many of us had reached our bottom point, and we felt there was no risk in trying a program of recovery. Yet, we still had some distorted security in our harmful ways of relating to others or in our addictions. Letting go was an experiment. This program gives us guidelines for experimenting with our life for growth, and we continue growing everyday.
Some of our benefits are increased confidence and self respect, more intimacy with our partner, better friendships, and better physical health. We feel these changes in ourselves, and we see them in the other men and women in this program.
Today, I am grateful for the rewards in my life from this experiment in recovery.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Harmony exists in difference no less than in likeness, if only the same keynote governs both parts. --Margaret Fuller
Harmony exists everywhere, as an entity of itself. Our personal attitudes bring the disharmony to a situation. An attitude of love can bless all situations and all people.
The converse is likewise true. We all desire harmony in our relationships. And we will find it, every time we bring an attitude of honest gratitude into a situation.
How we feel, today, about this person or that situation, reflects the strength of our relationship with God. When we experience life in the company of our higher power, we will let life flow. We will observe harmony, then, even in the midst of difference.
All of life's elements are moving toward a state of total and perfect harmony. We need not fear. We can trust the company of our higher power and know that every situation, no matter how adverse its appearance, is contributing to a harmonious outcome if we'd but lend a trusting attitude.
Harmony is everywhere. I will celebrate it. I will trust the present. I will trust the future.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Have Some Fun
Have some fun. Loosen up a bit. Enjoy life!
We do not have to be so somber and serious. We do not have to be so reflective, so critical, so bound up within the rigid parameters and ourselves others, and often ourselves, have placed around us.
This is life, not a funeral service. Have some fun with it. Enter into it. Participate. Experiment. Take a risk. Be spontaneous. Do not always be so concerned about doing it right, doing the appropriate thing.
Do not always be so concerned about what others will think or say. What they think and say are their issues not ours. Do not be so afraid of making a mistake. Do not be so fearful and proper. Do not inhibit yourself so much.
God did not intend us to be so inhibited, so restricted, so controlled. These repressive parameters are what other people have imposed on us, what we have allowed to be done to us.
We were created fully human. We were given emotions, desires, hopes, dreams, feelings. There is an alive, excited, fun loving child in us somewhere! Let it come out! Let it come alive! Let it have some fun - not just for two hours on Saturday evening. Bring it with us. Let it help us enjoy this gift of being alive, being fully human, and being who we are!
So many rules. So much shame we've lived with. It simply isn't necessary. We have been brainwashed. It is time now to free ourselves, let ourselves go, and enter fully human into a full life.
Don't worry. We will learn our lessons when necessary. We have learned discipline. We will not go awry. What will happen is that we will begin enjoying life. We will begin enjoying and experiencing our whole self. We can trust ourselves. We have boundaries now. We have our program for a foundation. We can afford to experiment and experience. We are in touch with our Higher Power and ourselves. We are being guided, but a frozen, inanimate object cannot be guided. it cannot even be moved.
Have some fun. Loosen up a bit. Break a few rules. God won't punish us. We do not have to allow people to punish us. And we can stop punishing ourselves. As long as we're here and alive, let's begin to live.
Today, I will let myself have some fun with life. I will loosen up a bit, knowing I won't crack and break. God, help me let go of my need to be so inhibited, proper, and repressed. Help me inject a big dose of life into myself by letting myself be fully alive and human.
Today I know I'm being guided and protected on my path for growth and freedom. All the positive energy in the universe is working for my greatest good. All I have to do is put one foot in front of the other. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
What’s Your Handicap?
“What’s your handicap?” the golfer asked his partner. “My childhood,” said his companion.
Some handicaps are physical, certain limitations placed on our bodies. Other handicaps are emotional, burdens of heartache from sad or abusive childhoods. Others may be dealing with current issues– perhaps facing a terminal illness or grieving an irreparable loss.
After losing my son, I found myself at a point where I simply could no longer stand the agony of waiting for my pain to disappear. I knew that all my life I would miss him, and I became absolutely despondent. There is no way out of this, I thought. I’m spending my life waiting for this pain to disappear so I can begin living my life again. But the pain never will disappear. And I’ll never begin living my life again. That’s when a gentle idea began to change my life.
I began to understand that I was living and working with a handicap. The loss would always be there. The pain and heartache would always be present. I could accept that, treat it as a handicap, and within that framework go ahead and live my life once more. The moment I made that decision, my attitude and perspective changed. I was able to go on, able to move forward.
Many of us are living with handicaps. Some will change over time, but others won’t. If that’s the case, stop waiting for your handicap to disappear. Instead, decide to live with it. Work around it. Treat yourself with care, with gentleness. Allow yourself to feel and experience all the limitations and emotions of your present situation. Accept them. Let them be part of you, part of your experience.
Despite living with a handicap, go ahead and treat yourself to life.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Let your intuition help guide you
Paying very close attention to your intuition is perhaps the most important rule of all.
–Lynn Hill
For many years, I used intuition or spiritual guidance only in times of deep need, crisis, or despair. It was a last resort. I didn’t know the word intuition. What I knew then was to plow forward, figure things out in my head as best as I could, then proceed. Occasionally, I would find myself backed into a corner or at a dead end. Then, and only then would I go to intuition.
And I didn’t go to it. It came to me.
Over the years, intuition has become critically important. I recently made a friend who is a highly intuitive woman. She would encourage me to learn to go with the flow and relax.
“Practice at the grocery store,” she said. “Practice using your intuition in the small details of your life, those times you don’t think it matters. If you practice using your intuition in the smaller details, you’ll begin to be able to trust your intuition in important matters,too.”
“I can’t,” I said.
“Yes, you can,” she said. “Just practice.”
Over the years, I slowly moved toward intuition, and away from solely rational thought. It was an awkward journey. I was propelled along the road after Shane died. For a long period, I was deeply into my emotions. I came to rely on my intuition, more and more.
Now, intuitive guidance is a regular part of my daily life.
But for those who feel as awkward and stymied about accessing intuition as I once did let me give you a few ideas that have helped me.
. Consciously relax. When an issue or a decision needs to be made, small or large, relax first. Do not panic or become tense. Responding with panic will block our connection to intuition.
. Ask yourself, What feels right? This answer will arise from a peaceful, nonemotional place, not a place of urgency or fear. If more than one choice or solution comes to mind, feel out each solution. Does one feel bland and lifeless? Does one feel heavy and dark? Does one solution feel lighter and right?
. If you don’t know what to do, let it go. Go do something else, occupy your busy, rational mind. Often, an intuitive thought will pop into our minds later, when we stop trying to force the answer.
As with most other areas of our lives, practicing to relax and learning to trust ourselves is the key. Often, the intuitive answer is something that feels like the natural thing to do. Sometimes our intuition tells us to do something that looks absurd at first glance.
Honor this connection we all have to information beyond the scope of rational thought. You’ll make silly mistakes from time to time. Most of us do. And don’t discount the power of rational thought and plain common sense. But in times of indecision, let intuition be a regular, not a last resort, resource you rely upon.
God, help me relax and listen to that still, small voice. Help me remember that when I listen to my intuition, I’m listening to one of the ways that you speak to me.
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In God’s Care
Know all and you will pardon all.
~~Thomas a’ Kempis
We are quick to forgive our own transgressions because we know ourselves. We know our weaknesses, motivations, and the combination of influences that go into the decisions we make.
But we don’t know everything that prompts others’ attitudes and behaviors. We have no way of knowing if they are in physical pain, or if they have just suffered some emotional blow. We criticize many people without knowing anything about their experiences. If we were to know more about them, we might be more tolerant. God does know – and forgives everything. We can ber forgiving also.
I will remember today that everyone is deserving of my forgiveness.
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Day By Day
Looking for the answers
We are learning that the geographical cure does not guarantee staying clean and sober. As the saying has it, no mater where you go, there you are. We are learning that it’s better to look for the answers in ourselves and our program than in a different city or country.
No person, place, or thing will keep us clean and sober. Recovery is in our program, in our hearts, and in the “still small voice within.”
Do I know where to look for answers?
Higher Power, help me see that I will find answers only in my soul and not in distant places.
Today I will look within by…
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Food for Thought
Always Abstinence
As recovering compulsive overeaters, we have a fixed focal point of reference. Abstinence is the most important thing in our lives without exception.
What began, as weakness has become strength. Whatever happens to us, we know that by maintaining abstinence we will be able to cope. As long as abstinence controls our self-destructive inner enemy, we are able to function effectively.
This does not mean that we will be free from problems. Abstaining does not get rid of all of our difficulties. There will be times when we are depressed, anxious, afraid, angry, bored, and in pain. To be alive is to be subject to these negative emotions, as well as the positive ones, which we enjoy.
By abstaining, we are able to face reality instead of escaping into a worse predicament. No matter how difficult the day, it has been a good one for the compulsive overeater who has abstained.
I pray for abstinence always.
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Personal Tales
Writing Your Story by Madisyn Taylor
We all have a story to tell whether we publish it or keep it for just ourselves or family; allow yourself to be heard.
Everyone, at one time or another, has wanted to express his or her story. Writing a memoir to read privately, share with family or friends, or publish is an emotionally satisfying way to gain perspective on your experiences while sharing your unique voice. We’ve all experienced feelings and events in our lives that we are longing to write down. Giving in to that urge can give you an outlet for purging any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. No one else has to read it. You may even want to write your story without reading it right away. Satisfying the need to tell your story is not predicated upon your writing ability. It does, however take effort to write down the truth in detail. Your memories, captured on paper as descriptive scenes, sights, sounds, and scents, may at first seem disconnected or incomplete. But rest assured that you possess the ability to shape your recollections into stories.
Everyone wants to be heard. Reading your story to others can meet that need. Writing your story can also help you understand your life experiences. And when you finish writing, you may be surprised at what you have accomplished. Your story can encompass as much or as little of your life as you prefer. You may surprise yourself with new insights, or you may find yourself exploring your roots, your identity, and your future through your words. Allow your writing to guide you and write as truthfully as possible. Don’t worry about what others will think of your personal journey, your style of writing, or your words.
Research has shown that writing a personal narrative filled with feelings and perceptions can create long-term health benefits. As you write, remember to have compassion for yourself, particularly when writing about traumatic events. If you are a young person, you can add to your life story as you grow older. Your writing may help family members know you better, or they may understand themselves more through reading about your experiences. More importantly, you are expressing yourself in a permanent way, giving a gift to yourself, and letting your voice be heard. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The feeling of self-pity, which we’ve all suffered at one time or another, is one of the ugliest emotions we can experience. We don’t even relish the thought of admitting to others that we’re awash in self-pity. We hate being told that it shows; we quickly argue that we’re feeling another emotion instead; we go so far as to “cleverly” hide from ourselves the fact that we’re going through a siege of “poor-meism.” By the same token, in a split-second we can easily find feeling sorry for ourselves. Do I sometimes enjoy rubbing salt into my own wounds?
Today I Pray
May I recognize the emotions I am feeling for what they are. If I am unable to point them out to myself, may I count on others who know what it’s like to be a feelings-stuffer. May I stay in touch with my feelings by staying in touch with my Higher Power and with the others in my group.
Today I Will Remember
Stay in touch.
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One More Day
Positive Attitudes — optimism, high self-esteem, and outgoing nature, joyousness, and the ability to cope with stress — when established early in life, may be the most important basis for continued good health.
– Helen Hayes
Positive attitudes and high self-esteem are wonderful attributes, but not all of us are lucky enough to develop them early in our lives. Because we haven’t developed strong coping strategies doesn’t mean we don’t have the opportunity now. It’s hard to change, and we can only do it if it becomes important for us to make th effort.
When we are going through stressful times, especially to those times related to a health problem, we can develop our courage by acting “as if” we have high self-esteem, “as if” we can cope well. Remarkable, we may find that we do.
A time of high stress has forced me to face my own character deficits. I am working on developing positive attitudes.
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One Day At A Time
TRADITION TWELVE
“If you cannot mold yourself to such as you would wish,
how can you expect others to be entirely to your liking?”
Thomas `a Kempis
Compulsive overeaters come from every age group, socioeconomic group, race, color, creed, sexual orientation, and so on. No two of us are alike. The Twelfth Tradition teaches us to place principles before personalities. This is one of the traditions by which our program either lives or dies. Because we are so very different, we are going to have varying opinions -- sometimes almost explosively different opinions -- on issues affecting our fellowship as a whole. When those times arise, it is essential that we remember to place principles before personalities.
When I served on my first Group Conscious Committee, our home group called it “serving our one-year sentence.” It was a hard year and it was difficult to get much business done because it was difficult to get people to agree on much business. But it was just the experience I needed in practicing the Twelfth Tradition in my life. Always remembering that Tradition, I did my best to not allow personalities to clutter my decision-making process in the committee.
The principles of the program are set forth in the Steps. They are principles such as: honesty, faith, forgiveness, trust, hope, courage, willingness and humility. As we work to embody these principles by working the Steps in our lives, we reduce the chance that issues affecting our fellowship will divide us. It will be easier to look beyond the perceived faults of others and to see the needs of the fellowship and the good of the whole.
One day at a time...
I will look past my OA members’ perceived faults and see the needs of the fellowship.
~ Carolyn H.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witch-burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. - Pg. 103 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Abstinence, honesty, and the willingness 'to turn it over' are the only ways to fight the Four Horsemen of mind-affecting chemicals: Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, and Despair.
Let me understand that the battle is no longer mine if I practice the Third Step to the best of my ability.
Divine Manifesting
I can imagine a better life. I can visualize what I would like to bring into my life. I can align my will with the source energy and quietly trust that what I see will come forth in its own time. I can bring my highest good towards me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Divine Manifesting comes as you make contact with your Divine Self, and open to Its guidance, energy, power, love, and wisdom. Your Divine Self has all the answers, and can assist you in every area of your life. If you would like a blessing, insight, energy, or any other gifts from your Divine Self, ask for this right now. Contact your Divine Self by getting very quiet, letting go of all thoughts, and enter into a peaceful, silent state. Although your Divine Self is present through all states of consciousness, it is often in the silence of no-thought that you can most easily receive the energy of your Divine Self. Know that your Divine Self always responds to any request. Answers, energy, and blessings are given to you as you ask for them.
Sanaya and Duane
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We do not believe in lemming recovery. Clement wrote 'faith must go hand in hand with inquiry.' If you do not 'get' something, ASK. Ask at meetings, ask a clean and sober friend, ask your sponsor, or ask your Higher Power in prayer.
The only stupid question is the one I don't ask.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Just because you have pain, doesn't mean you have to be one.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know I'm being guided and protected on my path for growth and freedom. All the positive energy in the universe is working for my greatest good. All I have to do is put one foot in front of the other.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Under every blouse there's a bust, under every skirt there's a slip. - Unknown origin. ( Been trying to think of a male version of this.)
bluidkiti
07-28-2015, 10:05 AM
July 30
Daily Reflections
GIVING BACK
. . . . he has struck something better than gold. . . . He may not see at
once that he has barely scratched a limitless lode which will pay
dividends only if he mines it for the rest of his life and insists on giving
away the entire product.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 129
My part of the Seventh Tradition means so much more than just giving
money to pay for the coffee. It means being accepted for myself by
belonging to a group. For the first time I can be responsible, because I
have a choice. I can learn the principals of working out problems in my
daily life by getting involved in the "business" of A.A. By being
self-supporting, I can give back to A.A. what A.A. gave to me! Giving
back to A.A. not only ensures my own sobriety, but allows me to buy
insurance that A.A. will be here for my grandchildren.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
The other day we should not worry about is tomorrow, with its possible
adversities, its burdens, its large promise, and perhaps its poor
performance. Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.
Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of
clouds, but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in tomorrow, for
it is as yet unborn. Do I still worry too much about tomorrow?
Meditation For The Day
"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not
seen." Faith is not seeing, but believing. Down through the ages, there
have always been those who obeyed the heavenly vision, not seeing
but believing in God. And their faith was rewarded. So shall it be to
you. Good things will happen to you. You cannot see God, but you
can see the results of faith in human lives, changing them from defeat to
victory. God's grace is available to all who have faith-not seeing, but
believing. With faith, life can be victorious and happy.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have faith enough to believe without seeing. I pray
that I may be content with the results of my faith.
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As Bill Sees It
Reaching for Humility, p. 211
We saw we needn't always be bludgeoned and beatened into
humility. It could come quite as much from our voluntary reaching
for it as it could from unremitting suffering.
********************************
"We first reach for a little humility, knowing that we shall perish
of alcoholism if we do not. After a time, though we may still
rebel somewhat, we commence to practice humility because this is
the right thing to do. Then comes the day when, finally freed in
large degree from rebellion, we practice humility because we
deeply want it as a way of life."
1. 12 & 12, p. 75
2. Letter, 1966
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Walk In Dry Places
Founders with clay feet
Sound thinking
With any organization or society, the time comes when people find fault with the founders. The faults of these pioneering leaders are examined and perhaps even used to discredit them.
Founders are only human beings, and they are likely to exhibit the human shortcomings all of us have. If these founders turn out to have clay feet, perhaps the fault is ours for idolizing them in the first place.
The real role of a founder is to lay the foundation for further building. Unless the society grows, improving over what the founder had in mind, it is not likely to survive. Its real work should be to surpass the fonder so as to be of greater service to others.
I'll be careful not to put anyone on a pedestal and then complain about his or her clay feet.
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Keep It Simple
Beauty may be said to be God's trademark in creation.---Henry Ward Beecher
Our addiction was like a veil over our heads. We saw the world as an ugly place.
We saw people as trouble. We thought our drinks and drugs were beautiful. But even they became ugly over time. Life became ugly because we had put distance between our Higher Power and ourselves.
Now we are blessed because the veil is lifted, and we are part of the healing process. We help others step into the beauty of recovery.
Our spirits are again free to seek a relationship with God and others. Through these relationships, we get our hope back. This hope help us focus on the beauty of the world. Hope is the rain that helps our souls grow.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, the world is both beautiful and ugly. For to long I only saw the ugly. Help me focus on the beauty.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll keep an eye out for the beauty recovery holds for me. Throughout the day, I'll pray for this.
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Each Day a New Beginning
It is the creative potential itself in human beings that is the image of God. --Mary Daly
God's presence is within us, now and always, even though we feel alone, alienated, scared, and forgotten much of the time. We often overlook God's presence because we don't recognize it. Our talents, our desires, and our pursuits are the evidence--all the evidence we'll ever need once we understand it--that God is present within and about us all the time.
The creative potential goes unrealized among so many of us, perhaps because we have a rigid definition of what creativity is. We are creative. We are all, each of us, creative. We must be because God's presence is here now. When we choose to let it guide us, we'll be able to offer our own unique gifts to the world of friends around us. Encouraging creativity, our own and someone else's, may mean breaking old habits. It surely does mean stepping out of our own way. It also means giving ourselves fully to the experience of the moment and trusting that God's presence will prompt the deliverance of our special gift.
In the moment lives God within us. In the moment I am creative, blessed with gifts like no other. I will stay in the moment and offer them, guided by the God within.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Do not be discouraged if your prospect does not respond at once. Search out another alcoholic and try again. You are sure to find someone desperate enough to accept with eagerness what you offer. We find it a waste of time to keep chasing a man who cannot or will not work with you. If you leave such a person alone, he may soon become convinced that he cannot recover by himself. To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some other alcoholic an opportunity to live and be happy. One of our Fellowship failed entirely with his first half dozen prospects. He often says that if he had continued to work on them, he might have deprived many others, who have since recovered, of their chance.
p. 96
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Drinking released me from the suffocating fear, the feelings of inadequacy, and the nagging voices at the back of my head that told me I would never measure up. All of those things melted away when I drank. The bottle was my friend, my companion, a portable vacation. Whenever life was too intense, alcohol would take the edge off or obliterate the problem altogether for a time.
p. 310
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
"This is the Step that separates the men from the boys." So declares a well-loved clergyman who happens to be one of A.A.'s greatest friends. He goes on to explain that any person capable of enough willingness and honesty to try repeatedly Step Six on all his faults--without any reservations whatever--has indeed come a long way spiritually, and is therefore entitled to be called a man who is sincerely trying to grow in the image and likeness of his own Creator.
p. 63
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Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread,
remade all the time, made new.
--Ursula K. Le Guin
If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of
tomorrow, you have no today for which you can be thankful.
--Anonymous
God will never give you more than you & Him together can handle.
--unknown
"As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands. One for
helping yourself, the other for helping others."
--Audrey Hepburn
AA is my "God with skin on."
--unknown
If you drink at the bad news you got today, you'll never know you
could get through it without drinking.
--unknown
"Every single act of love releases blocked energy in your body.
Unconditional love heals the body and the mind. Keep reminding
yourself of this truth until it becomes your reality. Love is a frequency
that you can choose to tune into, just as you tune into a frequency on
the radio."
--Wayne Dyer
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
WORDS
"Hear the meaning within the word."
--William Shakespeare
When I hear or see the word "sobriety", I am made to think of
relationships: my relationship with God, man and, more importantly,
myself. Sobriety means humor, hope and joy. It means a silence at the
center of my being that "wonders" at it all. Sobriety means a sexuality
that is both noble and free -- that risks rejection and criticism.
Sobriety argues against prejudice and bigotry. It builds a bridge to
"the different" and reflects on the creative variety of man. It allows
me a God as I understand Him but also respects tradition and the
ancient philosophies of the world.
Sobriety evokes a feeling that is beyond words. It echoes the spiritual
life.
Let me learn to pray beyond words. Let my relationship with You
grow in silence.
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"Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; when I fall, I will arise; when I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me."
Micah 7:8
Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking,
be put away from you, with all malice.
Ephesians 4:31
"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with
the glory that will be revealed in us."
Romans 8:18
"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to
listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger
does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Therefore,
get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and
humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you."
James 1:19-21
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Daily Inspiration
Much can be said by the look on your face. Lord, may I be quick to smile and display an attitude of graciousness and peace so that I am able to put those around me at ease and bring out the best in them.
God's blessings come in packages both large and small. Sometimes they are expected and sometimes not. Sometimes they are recognized and sometimes not. Lord, thank you for the joy You light in me, even in times of sorrow. Please use me to bless someone else.
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NA Just For Today
Regular Inventory
"Continuing to take a personal inventory means that we form a habit of looking at ourselves, our actions, attitudes, and relationships on a regular basis."
Basic Text, p.41
Taking a regular inventory is a key element in our new pattern of living. In our addiction, we examined ourselves as little as possible. We weren't happy with how we were living our lives, but we didn't feel that we could change the way we lived. Self- examination, we felt, would have been a painful exercise in futility.
Today, all that is changing. Where we were powerless over our addiction, we've found a Power greater than ourselves that has helped us stop using. Where we once felt lost in life's maze, we've found guidance in the experience of our fellow recovering addicts and our ever-improving contact with our Higher Power. We need not feel trapped by our old, destructive patterns. We can live differently if we choose.
By establishing a regular pattern of taking our own inventory, we give ourselves the opportunity to change anything in our lives that doesn't work. If we've started doing something that causes problems, we can start changing our behavior before it gets completely out of hand. And if we're doing something that prevents problems from occurring, we can take note of that, too, and encourage ourselves to keep doing what works.
Just for today: I will make a commitment to include a regular inventory in my new pattern of living.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The hopeful man sees success where others see failure, sunshine where others see shadows and storm. --O. S. Marden
When wise men say, "Hope springs eternal," they are reminding us that no matter how great are the obstacles, the hope of winning out in the long run still exists. Hope is our friend when all else has failed. When we have strength of character and an energetic mind, hope always flourishes.
We discover that, at the very brink of despair, we will find courage to keep trying as long as there is hope for success. After all, what have we got to lose? Without hope, we have no chance, anyway. Our chance for glory comes when we keep trying even though all seems lost. Our hearts remain strong and brave when hope reminds us that challenges last until a game is over.
What light of hope can I keep burning within me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Many could forego heavy meals, a full wardrobe, a fine house, et cetera; it is the ego they cannot forego. --Mohandas Gandhi
We inevitably confront our ego in this program. We face our macho self, our powerful self, or our always-right self. We have developed many trappings, which give us an identity: our car, our stereo system, our job, our popularity, or our place to sit in church. The more attached we are to these trappings, the tougher it is for us to make progress on this spiritual path.
In stepping across a stream we must leave the side we are on in order to get to the other side. The repeated challenge in our spiritual life is to leave the secure trappings we know and take comfort in the still unknown new self. That is the leap of faith. We take the risk and trust something will be there for us. We have faith that letting go of our immediate attachments will bring us to a better place, that God will be there for us.
I will let go of external images and use my faith to take the leap forward.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It is the creative potential itself in human beings that is the image of God. --Mary Daly
God's presence is within us, now and always, even though we feel alone, alienated, scared, and forgotten much of the time. We often overlook God's presence because we don't recognize it. Our talents, our desires, and our pursuits are the evidence--all the evidence we'll ever need once we understand it--that God is present within and about us all the time.
The creative potential goes unrealized among so many of us, perhaps because we have a rigid definition of what creativity is. We are creative. We are all, each of us, creative. We must be because God's presence is here now. When we choose to let it guide us, we'll be able to offer our own unique gifts to the world of friends around us. Encouraging creativity, our own and someone else's, may mean breaking old habits. It surely does mean stepping out of our own way. It also means giving ourselves fully to the experience of the moment and trusting that God's presence will prompt the deliverance of our special gift.
In the moment lives God within us. In the moment I am creative, blessed with gifts like no other. I will stay in the moment and offer them, guided by the God within.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Accepting Powerlessness
Since I've been a child, I've been in an antagonistic relationship with an important emotional part of myself: my feelings. I have consistently tried to ignore, repress, or force my feelings away. I have tried to create unnatural feelings or force away feelings that were present.
I've denied I was angry, when in fact I was furious. I have told myself there must be something wrong with me for feeling angry, when anger was a reasonable and logical response to the situation.
I have told myself things didn't hurt, when they hurt very much. I have told myself stories such as "That person didn't mean to hurt me." . . . "He or she doesn't know any better." . . . "I need to be more understanding." The problem was that I had already been too understanding of the other person and not understanding and compassionate enough with myself.
It has not just been the large feelings I have been at war with; I have been battling the whole emotional aspect of myself. I have tried to use spiritual energy, mental energy, and even physical exertion to not feel what I need to feel to be healthy and alive.
I didn't succeed at my attempts to control emotions. Emotional control has been a survival behavior for me. I can thank that behavior for helping me get through many years and situations where I didn't have any better options. But I have learned a healthier behavior - accepting my feelings.
We are meant to feel. Part of our dysfunction is trying to deny or change that. Part of our recovery means learning to go with the flow of what we're feeling and what our feelings are trying to tell us.
We are responsible for our behaviors, but we do not have to control our feelings. We can let them happen. We can learn to embrace, enjoy, and experience - feel - the emotional part of ourselves.
Today, I will stop trying to force and control my emotions. Instead, I will give power and freedom to the emotional part of myself.
I am developing new and positive habits today. I am putting all my energy into moving forward and building a healthy life. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Find Your Own Healing Places
When I arrived in Sedona, I met Marianne. She and her husband ran the lodge where I stayed.
“You’ll like it here,” she said. “You’ll find the healing you need.”
“Where should I look?” I asked. “Where should I go? What things should I be sure to do?”
“There is no map for that,” she quietly replied. “You’ll find your own places. They’ll call to you or you’ll call them to you. You’ll be drawn to what you need.”
Sometimes, along the way, people specifically point things out to us. We get a clear plan about where to go next. But we can also reach a place for which there is no map, no itinerary, no set agenda for how to find our way. That’s because we’re supposed to be trusting our heart.
This is an important place on the journey. It tells us our heart can be trusted. It’s a time of joy, a time of trusting what we’ve learned and what we know, a time of trusting the universe and discovering that that trust is well placed.
You don’t need to be shown what to do next. Your heart and soul will lead the way. You’ll learn to tell when something is right, when something works.
Learn to find places of healing. Learn to find people, places, events, and rituals that work for you. Don’t worry about how to find them or wait for someone to point them out. They’ll call to you, or you’ll call them into your life.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Trust that feeling
“Let’s turn here,” he said, turning down a short road. We had been looking for a new restaurant to try, and lately they had all been disappointments. The sign at the start of the road was weathered, and I remembered eating at the place it adveritsed years ago. I didn’t like it very much.
The restaurant had changed some inside. We sat at a walk-in table next to a window looking out on the Pacific Ocean. Our server was gracious and genuine. We ordered crab cakes for breakfast. They were the best crab cakes that I ever had, and we ended up going back for dinner that same night.
The restaurant has become a regular place for us because we ignored what we thought we knew and went with a feeling instead.
After all the omelets, waffles, and crab cakes that we’ve eaten at that restaurant since then, I’m glad that my boyfriend trusted his intuition and his intuitive whim. Both men and women have been given the gift of intuition. It’s not a gender-specific thing, though sometimes we encourage men to focus more on the logical than the intuitive.
Open up. Trust your heart when it whispers quietly to you. Start small. Go for a drive and on a whim take a road you’ve never traveled before. Gradually, as you become more tuned in to your intuitive feelings, they will guide you along your path. Sometimes your intuition will help you find a nice place to eat; sometimes they’ll guide you to a winning career path and sometimes to a best friend.
Listen to your heart. Sometimes you need to ignore what you think you know, and go with your intuition.
God, teach me to listen to my heart.
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In God’s Care
Conscience is, in most men, an anticipation of the opinions of others. ~~Sir Henry Taylor
We are no longer in doubt about the right actions to take toward others. The program’s Steps clarify what is appropriate behavior. Thus we know that doing any injury — physical or emotional — to other people harms us as well as them.
One of the many rewards of recovery is being free to live without guilt. Name-calling, harmful gossip, intentional put-downs, hateful rejections no longer provide the perverse pleasure of years gone by. We now recognize the subtle joy of sincere and loving efforts. We find this joy in calling a frend who is faced with a painful decision, picking up groceris for an elderly neighbor, extending our friendship to the new person at work. We no longer need the fear of what others will think to curb our spiteful actions.
Our conscience may still guide our actions at times, but as we grow in our recovery, we begin to intuitively now what keeps us on track and in sync with God.
I will follow my God-given intuition today
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Day By Day
Realizing the consequences
No matter who we are as individuals, we all bear the consequences of our lifestyle and behavior. High, we experience pain, suffering, grief, and eventually insanity or premature death. Clean and sober, we experience rewarding lives.
Getting clean and sober doesn’t mean that we suddenly become conformists. But whoever or whatever we become, we must practice kindness and tolerance. If we do, our lives will be meaningful in ways we cannot imagine.
Am I fully aware of the consequences of my choices?
Higher Power, help me become more thoughtful and patient.
Today I will take stock of my lifestyle by…
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Food for Thought
Focus on Living
Before we found this program, we were obsessed with food and preoccupied with eating. Instead of concentrating our energies on love and work and play, we were side tracked into the unsatisfactory substitute of overeating.
Abstinence gives us a new lease on life. We can develop more satisfying relationships with our family and friends. Since it has been our habit to withdraw and please ourselves with food, it takes time and effort to learn to relate more closely to those we love. It also takes courage and the willingness to be open and vulnerable.
In our work, we have renewed energy and greater ability to concentrate. Where before we may have avoided difficult tasks, we now have the strength and confidence to attempt them.
When we give up eating as a favorite form of recreation, we can find other activities to enjoy. Being released from bondage to food and fat opens the door to all sorts of new possibilities. Less eating means much more living.
We are grateful for new life.
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Parental Fears
Breaking Family Ties that Bind by Madisyn Taylor
So often we come into this world carrying the fear of our parents as it is passed down to us and lived through us.
When we really examine our fears about something, we sometimes notice that the fear we have is not based on our own experience. Often, if we trace our fear back to its source, we find that one of our parents may have handed it down to us. For example, your mother or father may have had an intense fear of lack of money, stemming from their own life experiences. If that fear was not resolved by the time you came into the picture, chances are you inherited it. Meanwhile, you may have no actual experience of lacking money, so being fearful doesn’t make sense, and it may even block you from doing certain things you want to do.
Keeping in mind that your parents were only trying to protect you, and that most of the errors in judgment they made were made with the best intentions, it might be time to release this fear symbolically. You cannot resolve someone else’s fear for them, but you can decide to let go of it on your own behalf. Whether your parents are still alive or not, it is best to do this in a symbolic way, using visualization and, if you like, ritual. One simple visualization involves inviting your parent to sit across from you in your heart space and sharing your desire to move on from this fear, letting them know that you will not carry it anymore. You may be surprised at the response you get, because it’s possible they will be proud of you, grateful, and proud of your courage.
The more we do this deep inner work with our fears, the better we will be able to parent our own children without burdening them with fears that don’t belong to them. Some of us will do as much of this work as we can before we become parents, while others will be working on this even as our children become adults. Either way, the effects will be felt, because once we break our ties to the fears of the past, our children’s ties to those fears are greatly weakened, so it’s important to remember that it’s never too late. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we first come to The Program, the most common variety of self-pity begins: “Poor me! Why can’t I (fill in your own addiction) like everybody else? why me?” Such bemoaning, if allowed to persist, is a surefire invitation for a long walk off a pier — right back to the mess we were in before we came to The Program. When we stick around The Program for a while, we discover that it’s not just “me” at all; we become involved with people, from all walks of life, who are in exactly the same boat. Am I losing interest in my comfortably familiar “pity Pot?”
Today I Pray
When self-pity has me droopy and inert, may I look up, look around and perk up. Self-pity, God wills, vanishes in the light of other people’s shared troubles. may I always wish for friends honest enough to confront me if they see me digging my way back down into my old pity pit.
Today I Will Remember
Turn self-involvement into involvement.
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One More Day
There is nothing which we receive with so much reluctance as advice.
– Joseph Addison
As children, most of us were unreceptive to advice. Our parents offered words of warning and frequently we refused to hear because we needed independence.
Today, when friends or family members make suggestions, we might have some of the same reactions as we did as children. We still need independence, and some advice — no matter how well meant — carries with it the implication that we are less than capable of clearly seeing dangers or knowing our options. We;re better able now to weigh the messages we receive. We have two choices. When our loved ones offer suggestions that we know to be bad or inappropriate for us, we can remind ourselves that they are meant well and merely say thank you. When the advice is good, we can do the same thing.
I will listen carefully to all the loving advice given me.
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One Day At A Time
~ FORGIVENESS ~
Forgiveness for ourselves
is the journey from guilt
over what we have done or not done
to the celebration of what we have become.
Dr. Joan Borysenko
Steps 8 and 9 are very important to our recovery from compulsive eating. The 8th Step says that we need to make a list of those people we have harmed because of our disease, and to be willing to make amends to them.
The 9th Step says that we need to make direct amends to those people, if possible.
I would never condemn a sick person for being sick, yet I was ready to level blame at myself for being a compulsive overeater. I was mentally cruel to myself.
I abused my physical body with food and excess weight. While working Step 8, I needed to realize that I didn’t hurt just my family or friends when I was deep in my disease. I had to understand that I hurt myself as well. I said and did things that I’m not proud of because I didn’t know that I had a disease of compulsion. I had to place myself at the top of my amends list.
Some of the ways I can work Step 9 include remembering that I am a good person who just happens to be sick with a potentially fatal disease of compulsion. If I can remember that I am sick, then I won’t add more pain to what the disease already heaps on me. I can remember that a slip in abstinence is just that...a slip. It doesn’t reflect on my worth as a human being. I can be gentle with myself whenever times are rough. I can lean more on my Higher Power, so that I don’t have to depend upon my own unsteady willpower. I can forgive myself for the past pain I’ve caused myself and resolve not to hurt myself any more.
One Day at a Time . . .
I give myself the gift of forgiveness and amends.
~ Jeff ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others. Hearts are broken. Sweet relationships are dead. Affections have been uprooted. Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil. We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined. To his wife, he remarked, 'Don't see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain't it grand the wind stopped blowin'?' - Pg. 82 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whatever upset you right now, whether a feeling of terror, someone is frustrating you, you are angry or bored--try living in the solution, not the problem. Pick up your program book, close your eyes and leaf through. Run your finger down the page and where ever you stop, read the next three paragraphs. It's a random solution but often guided by Divine Presence.
May a Divinely Inspired solution find me now.
Inner Belief
I believe in this world; it is the place that I have been born into. I love the breeze and the grass, the sky and the water. I have an intimate exchange with nature - like a lover. I feel held and nourished. Caressed and soothed. I believe in people - they are the species to which I belong. I recognize that, underneath our superficial differences, we all want and need the same things. I believe that truth and goodness will prevail. I feel good with small gains. I see deep meaning in quiet things, and I am moved by a power that I cannot explain but that I sense inside and out. Today, I feel good, I am aware of the gifts of nature, of being alive. I am open to what lies around me.
I believe in life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Some members of the fellowship say 'Our mind is a dangerous neighborhood to be in alone.' But together we can be on block watch! Don't let your mind get the better of you. Turn that 'M' in me upside down, like we are asked to turn it over, and make a 'We' out of that 'Me.'
It isn't 'me' and 'you' anymore; it's 'we' and 'us.'
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Going to a meeting doesn't make you sober any more than going to church makes you a minister.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am developing new and positive habits today. I am putting all my energy into moving forward and building a healthy life.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
There's a test in the Big Book (p31) It says 'Try some controlled drinking, try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. Well that sounds real good, but that's not a viable test for me. I'd go into a bar, have two drinks and it would become very clear that this is just not a good test day. It's a good test, but tomorrow is a much better test day. - Bob D.
bluidkiti
07-30-2015, 08:04 AM
July 31
Daily Reflections
A PRAYER FOR ALL SEASONS
God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change.
Courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the
difference.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125
The power of this prayer is overwhelming in that its simple beauty
parallels the A.A. Fellowship. There are times when I get stuck while
reciting it, but if I examine the section which is troubling me, I find the
answer to my problem. The first time this happened I was scared, but
now I use it as a valuable tool. By accepting life as it is, I gain serenity.
By taking action, I gain courage and I thank God for the ability to
distinguish between those situations I can work on, and those I must
turn over. All that I have now is a gift from God: my life, my
usefulness, my contentment, and this program. The serenity enables
me to continue walking forward.
Alcoholics Anonymous is the easier, softer way.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
This leaves only one day - today. Anyone can fight the battles of just
one day. it is only when you and I add the burden of those two awful
eternity's, yesterday and tomorrow, that we break down. It is not the
experience of today that drives us mad. It is the remorse or bitterness
for something that happened yesterday or the dread of what tomorrow
may bring. Let us therefore do our best to live but one day at a time.
Am I living one day at a time?
Meditation For The Day
Give God the gift of a thankful heart. Try to see causes of
thankfulness in your everyday life. When life seems hard and troubles
crowd, then look for some reasons for thankfulness. There is nearly
always something you can be thankful for. The offering of
thanksgiving is indeed a sweet incense going up to God throughout a
busy day. Seek diligently for something to be glad and thankful about.
You will acquire in time the habit of being constantly grateful to God
for all His blessings. Each new day some new cause for joy and
gratitude will spring to your mind and you will thank God sincerely.
Prayer For The Day
I pray for a truly thankful heart. I pray that I may be constantly
reminded of causes for sincere gratitude.
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As Bill Sees It
Faith and Action, p. 212
Your prospect's religious education and training may be far superior
to yours. In that case, he is going to wonder how you can add
anything to what he already knows.
But he will be curious to learn why his convictions have not
worked and yours seem to work so well. He may be an example of
the truth that faith alone is insufficient. To be vital, faith must be
accompanied by self-sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.
Admit that he probably knows more about religion than you do,
but remind him that, however deep his faith and knowledge, these
qualities could not have served him very well, or he would not be
asking your help.
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Dr. Bob did not need me for his spiritual instruction. He had
already had more of that than I. What he did need, when we first
met, was the deflation at depth and the understanding that only one
drunk can give to another. What I needed was the humility of
self-forgetfulness and the kinship with another human being of my
own kind.
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 93
2. A.A. Today, p. 10
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Walk In Dry Places
Group Intelligence
Getting Ideas
"All of us know more than any one of us" is the saying that applies to 12 Step groups. No matter how much experience any single individual has, it's surpassed by the collective knowledge of the group.
That's a good reason in itself for drawing upon these groups. And there are others as well. We need the pool of intelligence that the groups build up over time. We need the group's strength when our own is waning.
We also learn help that comes in surprising ways. The person in the group who seems just knowledgeable may express an idea that is just what we need at the time.
The group can meet many of our needs if we give it a chance. Regular attendance at meetings will keep us in touch with the group's ideas.
I'll stay in touch today with ideas that come from members of my group. Joined together, we have lots of knowledge.
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Keep It Simple
Less is more.---Mies Vander Rohe
Our program is simple. It has four equal parts: sobriety, fellowship, service, and faith.
Sobriety means we don't use alcohol or drugs any more.
Fellowship means we let people into our lives. We work at having a life that's rich with friends.
Service means we help when we see the need. It means knowing we have much to offer.
Faith means we believe in a loving, caring Higher Power. It means using our Higher Power as a guide in life.
Ours is a simple, easy program. Just remember sobriety, fellowship, service and faith.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I may keep my program simple. I pray for sobriety, fellowship, service, and faith.
Action for the Day: Throughout the day, I'll remind myself that less is more.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The child is an almost universal symbol for the soul’s transformation. The child is whole, not yet divided….
When we would heal the mind… we ask this child to speak to us. ~ Susan Griffin
Was there ever a time when we did not feel divided from ourselves? Occasionally we get a glimpse of what such spiritual wholeness would be like, but most of the time we struggle with feelings of conflict, unevenness, a divided heart. Perhaps “the child” is a metaphor for a spiritual guide, like our own higher power, that can help us in our journey toward self-acceptance.
“I may not be perfect, but parts of me are excellent,” writes author Ashleigh Brilliant. If we can be happy with this proud, funny boast then perhaps we can stop berating ourselves for our imperfections. If we dwell on our own contradictory impulses, we give them too much importance, too much power.
Let me trust to my glimpses of harmony and wholeness and be grateful for the richness of my spirit.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Suppose now you are making your second visit to a man. He has read this volume and says he is prepared to go through with the Twelve Steps of the program of recovery. Having had the experience yourself, you can give him much practical advice. Let him know you are available if he wishes to make a decision and tell his story, but do not insist upon it if he prefers to consult someone else.
p. 96
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Blackouts became my goal. Though it may sound strange, they never frightened me. My life was ordered by school and home. When I blacked out, I simply went on autopilot for the remainder of the day. The thought of going through my teen years without a single memory of its passing was very appealing.
p. 310
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Six - "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
Of course, the often disputed question of whether God can--and will, under certain conditions--remove defects of character will be answered with a prompt affirmative by almost any A.A. member. To him, this proposition will be no theory at all; it will be just about the largest fact in his life. He will usually offer his proof in a statement like this: "Sure, I was beaten, absolutely licked. My own willpower just wouldn't work on alcohol. Change of scene, the best efforts of family, friends, doctors, and clergymen got no place with my alcoholism. I simply couldn't stop drinking, and no human being could seem to do the job for me. But when I became willing to clean house and then asked a Higher Power, God as I understood Him, to give me release, my obsession to drink vanished. It was lifted right out of me."
p. 63
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In the rush and noise of life, as you have intervals, step within
yourselves and be still. Wait upon God and feel His good presence;
this will carry you through your day's business.
--William Penn
The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph.
--Thomas Paine
God is gentle with me. I am gentle with myself. I am in awe of God's
power; however it is God's gentleness that moves me. God's will for
me is that which is best for me; yet God does not force anything upon
me. Patiently, God waits for me to be still, to turn within and listen.
God's gentle spirit is my foundation. When the cares of the world
seem to overwhelm me and when challenges cause me to forget the
truths that support me, God's spirit gently caresses me, uplifting
and sustaining me. Because God is gentle with me, I am gentle with myself
and others. I do not condemn or speak hurtful words to others. My
actions are ones that encourage the unfoldment of God's divine plan in
myself and others. Through gentleness and love, God's work is done.
--unknown
"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies
inside of us while we live."
-- Norman Cousins
"Worry is like a rocking chair it gives you something to do but it
doesn't get you anywhere."
--Dorothy Galyean
There's as much risk in doing nothing as in doing something.
--Trammell Crow
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
TEMPTATION
"What makes resisting
temptation difficult for many
people is that they don't want to
discourage it completely."
--Franklin P. Jones
Usually I am tempted because I want to be. I allow myself to get too
close to the object of my desire or I invite the problem into my life
knowing that I will not resist it. Then I use my "imperfection" as an
excuse! In this way I manipulate my spiritual program and become
dishonest.
When I first got sober, I did not allow alcohol in my house; I did not go
to bars; I did not spend time with heavy drinkers; I avoided airplanes
or places that I would associate with alcohol. This disciplined approach
to sobriety worked. If you don't invite the enemy in, you won't get
beaten up. I need to continue to remember these simple rules and not
get complacent in my sobriety.
Let me keep temptation out of my life by avoiding it.
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"And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."
Matthew 28:20b
If any man is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink. He who believes in
Me, as the Scripture said, "From his innermost being shall flow rivers
of living water."
John 7:37-38
"Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God
must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who seek
Him."
Hebrews 11:6
Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the
glory of God.
1 Corinthians 10:31
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Daily Inspiration
The more of God's love that you share, the more you receive. Lord, help me to be compassionate when someone needs an ear and encouraging when someone needs a little support.
When you are troubled, comfort someone more troubled, when lonely, reach out to one that is lonelier and when unsure, give encouragement to the weary. To care for another makes us forget our own sorrows. Lord, You comfort me. Help me now to be a comforter.
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NA Just For Today
Freedom From Active Addiction
"Narcotics Anonymous offers only one promise and that is freedom from active addiction, the solution that eluded us for so long."
Basic Text, p.102
NA offers no promises other than freedom from active addiction. It is true that some of our members meet with financial success in recovery. They buy nice houses, drive new cars, wear fine clothes, and form beautiful families. These outward signs of prosperity are not the lot of all of our members, however. A great many of us never achieve financial success. This does not necessarily reflect on the quality of our recovery.
When we are tempted to compare ourselves to these other, seemingly more affluent members, it is good to remember why we came to the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. We came because our lives had fallen down around us. We were emotionally, physically, and spiritually defeated. Our Basic Text reminds us that "in desperation we sought help from each other in Narcotics Anonymous" We came because we were beaten. For addicts, even one day clean is a miracle. When we remember why we came to Narcotics Anonymous and in what condition we arrived, we realize that material wealth pales in comparison to the spiritual riches we have gained in recovery.
Just for today: I have been given a spiritual gift greater than material wealth: my recovery. I will thank the God of my understanding for my freedom from active addiction.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose. --Billie Holiday
We all see things differently. It is part of the wonderful variety of the world that we all have different points of view. We've all seen baseball players arguing with an umpire over a close call, but, in order to play the game, they must accept the umpire's judgment.
When we stubbornly refuse to let friends or family members speak their ideas simply because we disagree with them, we risk the loss of a friend or the understanding of a family member. It is when we allow others to disagree that we take a step forward--a step that opens our ears and our hearts to all sorts of people and ideas.
How well can I accept other's opinions today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Look at the post as a bullet. Once it's fired it's finished. --Catherine Bauby
Today is before us as an unformed experience. Yesterday took its own shape, and whatever it was has now gone. Our only opportunities exist in what we will do this day. Perhaps we can enhance the day by starting with a review of yesterday and then letting go. What were the major events in our experiences yesterday? How do we feel about them? Is something left unfinished in our feelings or actions that we need to complete or repair today? Can we take yesterday's experience to build a better today?
We have centered ourselves in this day by reviewing where we just came from. We have taken a spot check inventory. Now we can let go of yesterday and move forward in the present. That does not mean we never think about the past again. It means we build on the past by learning from our experiences and letting them shape our activities now. In that way we draw ever closer into accord with the will of our Higher Power.
I will let go of the past by learning from it. I give myself to shaping today.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Love doesn't just sit there like a stone, it has to be made, like brick; re-made all the time, made new. --Ursula K. LeGuin
We love to be loved; we love to be held; we love to be caressed. A show of appreciation we love too. And we love to know we've been heard. The friends, the spouses, the children in our lives want the same from us. Like a garden that needs water, sun, weeding to nurture the growth, so does love need attending to. To become whole and healthy women, we need tender nurturing. And we also need to give away what we get. Those we nurture will bless our growth.
Love is dynamic, not static. It is always changing, and it always changes those it enfolds. Since coming into this program where the sharing of oneself, the open expression of love, is profoundly evident, we each have changed. And our presence has changed others. We have learned to accept love and give it. But better yet, we have learned that we deserve love.
I will look around me today at others, and I will remember, my growth and theirs depends on loving and being loved. I will reach out. I can make love new.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of What We want
For those of us who have survived by controlling and surrendering, letting go may not come easily. --Beyond Codependency
In recovery, we learn that it is important to identify what we want and need. Where does this concept leave us? With a large but clearly identified package of currently unmet wants and needs. We've taken the risk to stop denying and to start accepting what we want and need. The problem is, the want or need hangs there, unmet.
This can be a frustrating, painful, annoying, and sometimes obsession-producing place to be.
After identifying our needs, there is a next step in getting our wants and needs met. This step is one of the spiritual ironies of recovery. The next step is letting go of our wants and needs after we have taken painstaking steps to identify them.
We let them go, we give them up - on a mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical level. Sometimes, this means we need to give up. It is not always easy to get to this place, but this is usually where we need to go.
How often I have denied a want or need, then gone through the steps to identify my needs, only to become annoyed, frustrated, and challenged because I don't have what I want and don't know how to get it. If I then embark on a plan to control or influence getting that want or need met, I usually make things worse. Searching, trying to control the process, does not work. I must, I have learned to my dismay, let go.
Sometimes, I even have to go to the point of saying, "I don't want it. I realize it's important to me, but I cannot control obtaining that in my life. Now, I don't care anymore if I have it or not. In fact, I'm going to be absolutely happy without it and without any hope of getting it, because hoping to get it is making me nuts - the more I hope and try to get it, the more frustrated I feel because I'm not getting it."
I don't know why the process works this way.
I know only that this is how the process works for me. I have found no way around the concept of letting go.
We often can have what we really want and need, or something better. Letting go is part of what we do to get it.
Today, I will strive to let go of those wants and needs that are causing me frustration. I will enter them on my goal list, then struggle to let go. I will trust God to bring me the desires of my heart, in God's time and in God's way.
My heart is full of gratitude today. I am free today to experience this day fully and to follow my spiritual path. I have been given a new day to live, to grow, to give love and to feel love. --Ruth Fishel
God help me to stay sober and clean today!
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Journey To The Heart
You Are Complete
Look around at all that lives, at all that is. See how connected each creation is to the workings of the universe. But see also that the essence of all that is, the core, lies within each. From the tiniest purple wildflower to the tallest redwood in the forest, each creation contains its own energy system, its own energy core for living. And so it is with us.
We’re intricately connected to the world. We receive energy, life-sustaining nourishment and support, from the world around us. But inside each of us is our own source for love, joy, and wisdom. Our ability to love, live, feel, and be happy comes from our own hearts.
Look inside yourself. Feel your vitality, your energy. Feel your essence. It is pure love. Everything you need in order to live and love is within you.
Nurture yourself. Let yourself grow. Learn to grow and walk in the ways of love. Learn from all who cross your path. Value your connections to others and the world around you. Receive and give freely as you walk down the road.
Take your place in the world. Know you are part of a complete universe. But remember, you are a complete universe,too.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Stay in the game
And it came to pass….
–The Bible
We can’t always be sure that things will always work out, but we will always have the strength to make it through. We can trust that eventually both the bad and the good will come to pass.
I’ve had the good ripped away from me and felt sorrow until I could drown. But it passed.
All I’m saying is that sometimes the bad guys win and the good guys lose. Sometimes it’s the other way around. Sometimes nothing that we do seems to swing the decision one way or the other, but we can always come back tomorrow. There’s a;ways another chance to play the game, dance, sweat, and cry. And maybe it’s the experience, not the outcome that is the true prize.
If you’re feeling a loss of strength or confidence, let go of the desperate need for a positive outcome in your life. Realize that this, too, will pass. Gain your strength from knowing that whether an event is good or bad, we’re enriched by our experiences. Only we can choose to learn from them or allow resentment and foolish expectations to destroy their value.
Dust yourself off. Pick yourself up. Step up to the plate and get back in the game.
God, give me hope, faith, and courage to live my life today.
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Food for Thought
Inner Guides
In a crisis situation, we cannot rely on another person, or a book, or any external source to tell us what to do. We may have to act immediately, and there may be no outside help available.
By getting in touch with our Higher Power, we cultivate a never failing source of inner strength and direction. In order to have it available when we need it, this inner voice must be consulted habitually. It is not something, which we may call on in times of emergency and forget about when things are going well.
Each of us has this inner source of strength and nourishment. By taking time each day to withdraw from the distractions of the external world, we grow in spiritual knowledge. When the chips are down, this spiritual strength, which we develop by daily prayer and meditation, is what will see us through.
May I know You more dearly each day.
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Making Over Our Partners
Changing the Way We Relate by Madisyn Taylor
It is dishonest to enter into a relationship with the idea that you are going to change or fix them.
A relationship, in the truest sense of the word, means relating to another. Usually when we say that we relate to someone, it is because we’ve found common ground. But part of relating is finding ways to make ideas that seem different come together. So often when we choose relationships, we try to fit another person into our predetermined ideal. When they don’t fit perfectly, we may try to make them over, creating our own vision from the raw material they’ve brought. But unless someone asks for guidance and direction, entering into a relationship with someone we want to change is dishonest. Then our relationship becomes with someone we’ve imagined, and anytime our partner steps outside of that imaginary projection, we will be disappointed. An honest relationship is one in which we accept each other as whole individuals, and find a way to share our life experiences together. Then, whenever we want, we can choose as a couple to give the relationship a makeover by renewing the ! way we interact.
By wanting to give another person a makeover, we are basically saying we don’t accept them for who they are. If we take a moment to imagine the roles reversed, we can get a sense of how it would feel if our beloved only committed to us because they thought we were, or would become, someone else entirely. In such an environment, we are not relating to each other from a real place, and we are keeping ourselves from being able to learn and grow from the different viewpoints that our partners offer.
If we feel that a change is needed in our relationship, the only makeover that we truly have the power to make is on ourselves. By accepting our partners for exactly who they are—the ideal and the not-so-ideal—we will create an energetic shift in our relationships, and we may find ourselves really appreciating our partners for the first time. Working from within, we determine how we relate to the people and the world around us, and when we can accept it and embrace it all, without conditions, we make every act of relating a positive one. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
One of the most serious consequences of the me-me-me syndrome is that we lose touch with practically everyone around us — not to mention reality itself. The essence of self-0pity is total self-absorption, and it feeds on itself. Rather than ignore such an emotional state — or deny that we’re in it — we need to pull out of our self-absorption, stand back, and take a good honest look at ourselves. Once we recognize self-pity for what it is, we can begin to do something about it. Am I living in the problem rather than the answer?
Today I Pray
I pray that my preoccupation with self, which is wound up tight as a Maypole, may unwind itself and let its streamers fly again for others to catch and hold. May the think, familiar wail of me-me-me become a chorus of us-us-us, as we in the fellowship pick apart our self-fullness and look at it together.
Today I Will Remember
Change me-me-me to us-us-us.
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One More Day
From happiness to suffering is a step; from suffering to happiness is an eternity.
– Jewish Proverb
The loss of normal good health can rock even the strongest person. In one fragile moment our life seems in shambles. All that we anticipated, all that we had planned, seems over forever. We wonder if we’ll ever get through this suffering.
For a while it may seem as though we are living underwater — nothing is clear or straightforward. The things that once gave us pleasure seem to disappear as grief takes their place. Friends offer to help — and they do help for a time — but ultimately we face our loss alone.
Finally we begin to understand that grief is a process, just as life is a process. We will be able to move toward acceptance and serenity, and eventually we can be happy again. We can continue to live.
I am consoled in knowing grief takes time, but it will end. I can continue to grow.
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One Day At A Time
NEGATIVE THINKING
“Condemn the fault and not the actor of it.”
William Shakespeare
How many times do we beat ourselves because we have failed to attain the goals we have set? We are human and we suffer from a disease that renders us helpless and out of control. Is it any wonder that we fail in trying to conquer such an unforgiving beast?
It is not ourselves we should be angry with, but the disease and how it affects our actions and reactions. Our inability – or unwillingness -- to realize that we cannot achieve recovery alone is our only true failure. We need help. Without it we are weak and defenseless. This disease would have us believe we are failures ~ but in reality, all we have done is open the doors to our enemy. These doors can be closed again. Our disease not only manifests itself in the form of uncontrollable eating, but also in our negative thoughts and actions towards ourselves and towards the people around us.
It takes no more time to think positively than it does to think negatively. Our only job is to remember that we have a disease. We can choose to forget it, we can choose to beat ourselves up when we leave the door ajar, or we can choose to forgive ourselves and begin again.
One day at a time...
I will work on forgiving myself.
I am worth forgiving.
You are too.
~Sue
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
As wives of Alcoholics Anonymous. we would like you to feel that we understand as perhaps few can. We want to analyze mistakes we have made. We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.
We have traveled a rocky road, there is no mistake about that. We have had long rendezvous with hurt pride, frustration, self pity, misunderstanding and fear. These are not pleasant companions. We have been driven to maudlin sympathy, to bitter resentment. Some of us veered from extreme to extreme, ever hoping that one day our loved ones would be themselves once more. - Pg. 104-105 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whatever you are feeling now that disturbs you, whatever thoughts or situations plague you, remember that it will pass. Sometimes when emotions are strong, we feel they will never end. But they do and whatever you are feeling now, you won't be feeling tomorrow. We promise.
I to understand that my troubles are not forever that 'this too shall pass.'
Seeing Me from the Inside Out
Today, I will become aware of that part of me that is separate and observes all that I say, do, think and feel. I have a witness within me that can become a very useful part of my life. Watching my thoughts, feelings and behavior with a little bit of objectivity will help me to see myself as I really am. Fear, for example, is only fear. When I experience small fears throughout my day I will simply see myself feeling them, I will watch them, experience them and allow them to dissipate. I will breathe in and out as they move through me. By allowing my mind to watch itself with no thought of controlling or participating, I can learn a great deal about the way I work. I can allow myself to change on the inside.
I am an uncritical observer of my own inner workings.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You don't have to pretend to be someone you are not. You don't have to pretend to be strong (if you're a man) or fem (if you're a woman). You don't have to pretend that you don't want to use, if you do. Share what is real. The real you is enough.
I am enough; there is enough.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
20/20: Come 20 minutes before the meeting, stay 20 minutes after.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
My heart is full of gratitude today. I am free today to experience this day fully and to follow my spiritual path. I have been given a new day to live, to grow, to give love and to feel love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If I quit causing my own trouble, I've got no trouble. All I have to do is trace this back - No matter what she had done - to where I had placed myself in a position to be hurt. - Milt L.
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