Today's Thought - March

[bluidkiti]

March 1

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.
--Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Newcomer

Initially, I was excited about recovery. I felt better for a while. I hate to say it, but now that I'm not at the beginning any more, everything seems worse. I feel more cynical than ever.

Sponsor

What you're experiencing is part of the process of recovery. Many of us go through a "honeymoon" phase in early recovery. Our craving may feel miraculously lifted. Change feels easy, and hope replaces despair.

Then, life feels difficult again. We may perceive ourselves as having gotten worse, but that's not accurate. What's really happening is that, though our addictive craving has been treated, we still have our old problems, habits, and states of mind. We may be getting through the day, showing up for our work responsibilities, attending meetings, but not having much fun. We may wonder if what we've heard is really true -- that "our worst day in recovery is better than our best day of active addiction." We may wonder whether recovery really is the answer after all.

Our doubt makes clear to us that we have to do something. Staying where we are is too uncomfortable. We can attend a Step meeting and read program literature to begin to familiarize ourselves with our next Step. For spirits in need of healing, Step work leads to the next phase of recovery.

Today, I have the courage to move forward in my journey of recovery.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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March 2

Love doesn't just sit there like a stone: it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new.
--Ursula K. Le Guin

Everyone could use a new batch of love every day. Way too often, we forget to make a new batch. Then we end up eating hard, old, crumbly stuff that doesn't even taste good. We forget to talk with the people we love. We tell ourselves that they should "know" we love them, even if we haven't called to connect with them for a long time. So we expect them to live off hard, old, dry crumbs too!

But baking a fresh batch of love is a lot easier than baking bread. All we have to do is make a phone call, write a letter or an email, or stop by our mom's house. We need to deliver the message that the people we love are important. What could be easier or more rewarding?

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me remember that love is a verb - something I do, not something that can be given once and stored forever. Help me be active in loving the important people in my life.

Today's Action

I will make it a point to make a fresh batch of love today and deliver it - in person or in a phone call, email, or letter.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

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March 3

The first skill needed for the Inner Game is called "letting it happen." This means gradually building a trust in the innate ability of your body to learn and to perform.
--W. Timothy Gallwey

A strange and intriguing mystery confronts us in the Twelve Steps. We are mending our ways; we are becoming accountable; we are striving to do what is right, yet we are learning to let go. This seems like a contradiction of logic, but it leads us to a spiritual awakening.

We are becoming like the accomplished tennis player who has practiced diligently to develop every detail of his skill. Yet when he is playing the game, he cannot focus on control. He must get his ego out of the way and let himself go. It is in letting go that he rises to his highest level of fulfillment. Today we will do what we must. We can make the choices we are faced with. Then we allow ourselves to be carried along by our Higher Power to complete and fulfill the process.

I will look for opportunities to let it happen today.





You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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March 4

G.O.D. = Good Orderly Direction
--Anonymous

When we decided to turn our will and lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him, we made a declaration of independence. We declared our freedom from the chains of our self-centered ego and the unrelenting demands of our self-will. When we decided that God was God and we were not, we began to receive the wonderful future that had been planned for us.

That decision was our claim to a new life. The prison that was our home has been destroyed. We decide to let go and let God on a daily basis. Our wills are always free to decide. We must decide to keep ourselves conscious at all times and listen to the voices that speak to us. We must decide to guard against our ego once again begging to run the show.

My will power will only be helpful to me when it is acting in accordance with my decision to let my Higher Power instruct me in the way to go.

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous

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March 5

I was talking to a friend about something I didn't want to do but believed I needed to do anyway. I was dreading it and feeling irritable. Often when we talk like that, other people scowl and say, "Oh, don't let shoulds control your life. If you don't want to do it, don't."

But this man understood. "At the risk of sounding old-fashioned," he said, "duty calls."

What's there to say about duty? It's a job, for different reasons, that needs to be done - whether we really want to or feel like it.

I learned about duty when my children, Nichole and Shane, were born. A lot of things needed to be done to take good care of them, whether I felt like doing all of those things or not.

I learned throughout the years that even the most exciting jobs have uninteresting and sometimes distasteful duties. When I worked for a daily newspaper, I loved my job. I enjoyed covering front-page news. But many of the stories I was assigned to were duty stories.

Sometimes a relative needs help. A parent may get sick, grow old, or become vulnerable or infirm. While we don't want to become duty-bound and strap our entire lives with shoulds, there are times in any relationship - family, romantic, or friend - when a code of honor rules and we do what we must.

"I believe we have deeper duties too," a friend said. "If we've been given sobriety, spiritual growth, or gifts, I believe that it's our duty to pass those gifts along and share them when we're asked."

Go ahead. Say arrrgh. Dread what you're about to do. I know, there are more interesting and exciting things calling your name. But for a moment, can you put those things aside?

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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March 6

When you do something you are proud of, dwell on it a little, praise yourself for it.
--Mildred Newman

Each one of us is very good at something. Maybe it's baseball or tennis where we display talent. Maybe we're good in math or at giving reports. A few people are talented at being good listeners or helpful friends. To recognize our own talents we may need help from others. It's always so much easier to see our faults, or the ways we don't meet our own expectations.

But the fact is, we are all skilled in many areas of our lives. To accept praise -- better yet, to quietly give it to ourselves -- is a sign of healthy growth.



You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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March 7

Every new moment that arises in your life can now be a point of choice. . .in which you can choose to treat yourself and others with Compassion rather than Judgment.
--David Harp

Newcomer

I wince every time I hear the words "God as we understood Him" and "Higher Power." When meetings close with the Lord's Prayer, I feel like I'm being railroaded. I don't fit into the same religious slot that other people seem to take for granted.

Sponsor

All of us qualify to be here, but not because of any religious identification or belief. Most of us are tolerant of differences, but, being human, some of us forget that not everyone shares the same religious context. Whatever an individual member has to say about the role of his or her Higher Power, the only requirement for membership [in the Program] is the desire to stop using the addictive substance that got us here.

Once I heard a member say, "This meeting is my church." I'm glad that notion works for her. By the same token, I've always been grateful that this program is not a church otherwise I might have to rebel against it! We're not required to subscribe to a particular set of religious beliefs or rituals. In recovery, each of us is free to explore what we believe.

Today, I respect others' rights to their beliefs, just as I respect my own. I bring my love of openness, inclusiveness, and harmony with me wherever I go.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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March 8

Some of the experiences we go through are hard. We get heavy at times.

"I'm drowning in my grief," I told a friend after my son died. "It feels like I'm swimming across an ocean, and I'm getting tired."

When it's too difficult to keep swimming, float.

Action:

What's more irritating than someone condescendingly telling you to smile when you feel glum? Feel all your feelings. Don't let anyone tell you they're wrong.

"I reached in my pocket today and found joy, happiness, success and gratitude," a friend said one day when he called. At first I didn't know what he was talking about. Then I remembered. Awhile back, when he was going through a difficult time, I had given him four little stones, each one painted with one of those words.

It's important to believe in tomorrow. But give yourself the gift that keeps on giving. Believe in today.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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March 9

Reflection for the Day

When I sit quietly and compare my life today with the way it used to be, the difference is almost beyond belief. But things aren't always rosy; some days are a lot better than others. I tend to accept the bad days more easily on an intellectual level than I do emotionally, or at gut-level. There are no pat answers, but part of the solution surely lies in a constant effort to practice all of the Twelve Steps. Do I accept the fact that my Higher Power will never give me more than I can handle one day at a time?

Today I Pray

That I may receive strength in the knowledge that God never gives us more than we can bear, that I can always, somehow, endure present pain, whereas the trials of a lifetime, condensed into one disastrous moment, would surely overcome me. Thanks be to God for giving us only those tribulations which are in proportion to our strength, never destroying us in our frailty. May I remember that fortitude grows out of suffering.

Today I Will Remember

Present pain is endurable.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

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March 10

Accepting Love

Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.

To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized.

We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find its own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy?

Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work?

We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help ourselves, the other person, or the relationship by trying to force it or by doing all the work.

Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want.

Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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March 11

People who lean on logic and philosophy and rational exposition end by starving the best part of the mind.
-- W. B. Yeats

It's a bitter pill to swallow, but our intelligence only gets in the way when we're dealing with things that really count -- our feelings and how we express them.

Love is the be all and end all. If we are capable of loving, we have nothing to worry about. If we're having trouble expressing our loving nature, our priority must be to remove the barriers. One of those barriers is our belief in the overriding importance of our intelligence.

Intelligence is like good looks; they are both unearned. And we can be sure that our Creator does not evaluate us on the basis of how intelligent we are. If we ask, God will help us overcome our reliance on our intelligence and all other handicaps that keep us from expressing love.

The best part of my mind links me to others, and to God.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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March 12

When we lose God, it is not God who is lost.
--Anonymous

At times any of us can fall into the trap of trying to make deals with God. The thought seems to be, if I can make a deal with God, then I can control the outcome that God alone seems to determine.

We cannot make deals with God - not because God is so hard-nosed, but because we don't need to bargain with God. The good we are trying to bargain for is already precious in the mind of God. We don't need to bargain for the benefit of others because God already loves those people and wants only good for them.

Yet at times we hear ourselves or others say things like, "Why doesn't God come through for me? I put my money in the offering tray every week, and I do things for my neighbors and friends. I volunteer for good causes. Yet I still feel insecure and scared. Why doesn't God answer my prayers?"

Perhaps the task is not to overwhelm God with all our effort but to quietly listen and discover that the gift was outside our door all the time. We were just too busy to pick it up.

Today, I will be open to fresh insights about the God of my understanding.



You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

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March 13

I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.
--Charles Schulz

Living one day at a time is a big project. Most of us have just enough faith, patience, and courage to last 24 hours. We all seem to be in need of a daily refueling.

Living in today helps keep our lives balanced and simple. At first, we may need to practice staying in the present. We may find that we need to keep bringing ourselves back to today from yesterday or tomorrow.

There is nothing that will happen today that we can't, with God's help, manage.

Today let me keep my feet firmly planted in the bedrock of the present, my only reality.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

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March 14

You will forget your misery; you will remember it as waters that have passed away.
-- Job 11:16

Many of us have painful memories we carry with us like pictures in a wallet. We keep these memories alive through feelings generated by those moments. Why are we so attached to unpleasant memories?

It's difficult to let go of memories, no matter how unpleasant. Sometimes they're a reminder of the past, but more often we clutch them because we're afraid to feel pleasant feelings today. Because the program is working in our lives, we have fewer painful times now. That may not be comfortable, so we invent new pain or dredge up the sludge of the past. As ugly as it may be, it's still familiar.

We don't have to look back. We don't have to feel misery or pain because it's familiar. We don't have to drag out that wallet and look at the images of unhappy times again. We can leave those spaces in our wallets empty, ready to be filled with new moments to remember.

I can try to make some new moments to remember. I don't need to look back anymore.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

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March 15

What we lack are not scientists but poets and people to reveal to the heart what the heart is ready to receive.
--Joseph Campbell

A short time ago, a friend handed me the following credo. It read:

This is the artist's dream:
To receive the inspiration to create,
To share that creation with others,
And to be totally supported in the process.

I asked him to explain further. "It all begins with inspiration," he said, "an inspiration that calls us to create. Once the inspiration is received, then we can bring that vision into the world as a song, painting, book, invention, new business - or any other tangible form.

"After the creation is born, it needs to be shared with others. No one creates in a vacuum. It is only when the vision is successfully communicated to its intended audience that it truly comes alive.

"Finally, the artist needs to be supported for what he does. If he has made a positive connection with his audience, the support will come - financially and emotionally. And while it may not always be there immediately, it will ultimately arrive. This is where the artist needs to trust and be patient."

This dream is not just the artist's dream. It is our dream as well. Through work or play, job or family, vocation or avocation, you can experience the joy of creating, sharing, and being acknowledged. Experience this creative process and you will never grow old in spirit. Have you ever known an artist or dreamer who "retired"?

You are reading from the book:

Listening to Your Inner Voice by Douglas Bloch

[bluidkiti]

March 16

Say when it's time to do that difficult thing.

Sometimes, true windows of opportunity open in our lives. We get a chance to make that amend. The perfect time to end or resolve that relationship arises. It's like a gift from God when that window opens up. All we need to do is gently step through. But sometimes, we need to help God open the window - especially when we're working up the courage to do a difficult thing.

Maybe we're waiting for just the right moment to end a relationship. Maybe we're looking for an opportunity to make amends, tell someone we're sorry about something we've done that's caused that person pain. Maybe we have a new project we'd like to begin. Sometimes, we can passively wait, and wait, and that window just seems painted shut and stuck.

Ask God to help open the window, but do your part, too. Make a decision that you're going to do it - whatever it is. Then let go, but not too long. Remember your decision. Remember your commitment to opening that window. Don't force it, but focus your attention. You may begin to feel the slightest crack in the energy, that opening you need. Or you may have to wiggle the window frame, push on it just the slightest bit, to crack it open yourself. Then you'll see it. You'll feel it move. There. It's open.

Help God open that window in your life by deciding to do it.

God, help me remember that the time doesn't always feel right. Help me honor my deepest urges to do what I must to take care of myself.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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March 17

In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love, you want the other person.
--Margaret Anderson

The expression of real love is so easy between grandparents and children - and between good friends it passes effortlessly. But why is it so hard to share real love with a spouse or lover? Why, instead, do we want to possess them? And from them we dream of selfless devotion. Yet neither possession nor devotion guarantees the security we long for.

Real love is not selfish; it frees both the giver and the receiver. Knowing we're loved sustains our hearts and diminishes our difficulties. It doesn't bind us, yet paradoxically it bonds our hearts. These encouragements to grow, to change, to dare to depart if it's for our own good, are expressions of real love. Real love is never ownership, only stewardship of this moment's experiences.

Let's be gentle with one another, and love fully with trust, as a child loves a grandmother.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

[bluidkiti]

March 18

Music drives the devil away.
--Martin Luther

How many times have we seen a movie and liked the music so much we went out and bought the sound track? It may have been classical music in the background, or country, western, jazz, or even rock music. Perhaps the music was soothing, or fun and spirited. It made us want to sing or dance. It was so good to listen to it made us feel good all over!

Music of many kinds can enrich the spirit, drive away our worries, and soothe tension. It's a gift we all can have as long as we can hear. And many who are hearing-impaired may still benefit from the rhythmic vibrations of music that are felt more than heard, but which can still be soothing.

When we take some time each day to stop and listen to music, we contribute to our physical well-being and our spiritual health. And we appreciate it when those who have the gift of making music share that gift with others. We may even find a music-making gift in ourselves that we can share and enjoy.

Today help me take time from the hectic part of my day and allow music to heal and refresh me.



You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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March 19

It's an esteemable act to stop and smell the roses.

For years I diligently and faithfully read my daily meditations. I worked them into my routine activities, just as I shower, brush my teeth, and press my clothes. After each reading, I'd stop and digest the material, allowing myself to mentally interpret each passage's meaning. It was a great way to begin my day. But over the years, I became careless in my reading and rushed through my daily meditations. As a result, I missed the essence of what keeps me grounded.

Do you really take the time to understand the meaning of your daily readings? On average, I'd imagine too few of us do. When we skim through our readings, we miss the real benefit of these powerful, inspirational, mind-altering tools. There is a richness in our reading that has the power to change a day, avert a disaster, calm a nerve, or untwist a mind wrought with anger. Think of a time when you needed help in making sense of an experience and you opened your book to just the right page, seemingly by accident. When we don't process what we read, how can it help us?

Yet if we invest the time, we will experience more abundance and a greater sense of serenity. We'll discover tools for living that previously eluded us. We'll feel better equipped to handle situations that used to baffle us because we're participating in our solution. We'll know a new freedom and a new happiness because we'll know we are not alone.

You're invited to take time to read, understand, and really digest your daily inspirational readings. The more you practice reading for understanding, the easier it becomes and the more you will benefit.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Esteemable Acts by Francine Ward

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March 20

F.I.N.E.
[I'm] Frustrated, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional

F.E.A.R.
Face Everything And Recover

N.U.T.S.
Not Using The Steps

E.G.O.
Edging God Out.

D.E.N.I.A.L.
Don't Even Notice I Am Lying.

H.A.L.T.
[Don't get too] Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired.

H.O.P.E.
Happy Our Program Exists

H.O.W.
Honesty, Open-mindedness, Willingness

S.P.O.N.S.O.R.
Sober Person Offering Newcomers Suggestions On Recovery.

G.O.D.
Good Orderly Direction

B.I.G. B.O.O.K.
Believing In God Beats Our Old Knowledge.

S.L.I.P.
Sobriety Losing Its Priority.

A.C.T.I.O.N.
Any Change To Improve Our Nature.

P.R.O.G.R.A.M.
People Relying On God Relaying A Message.

S.T.E.P.S.
Solutions To Every Problem Sober

K.I.S.S.
Keep It Simple, Sweetheart

You are reading from the book:

Keep Coming Back Gift Book by Meiji Stewart

[bluidkiti]

March 21

Even if you understand and follow all of the rules for more effectively engaging manipulators, life with them is not likely to be easy.
--George K. Simon Jr.

Sometimes they want something. Sometimes they want someone to give them something or to feel a particular way. They want power in some way, shape, or form. Manipulators prey on our weak spots.

Obsession and guilt are weapons. Manipulators get us to use these weapons on ourselves.

Sometimes we can disengage from manipulators - walk away, set a clear limit, be done with them. Other times, it's not that easy. We may be at least temporarily stuck with a boss or authority figure that indulges in heavy manipulation. One of our children may be going through a relentlessly manipulative period. We may have a parent whom we care about deeply who has adapted manipulation as a way of life.

Learn how to effectively deal with manipulators. Not everyone means what they say. . . Learn to recognize when others are telling you what they believe you want to hear. Learn to not react, stay clear, practice nonresistance, and stay true to yourself.

Be gentle with yourself if you have a manipulator in your life. You're not responsible for the other person's attempts at manipulation. You're responsible for staying clear.

God, help me let go the weak spots in myself that allow me to fall prey to manipulations. Help me stay clear of guilt and obsession so I can decide what's best for me.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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March 22

I play while I work and I work while I sleep. I depend on the functioning of my subconscious imagination to do my work.
--Edith Shannon

Our minds are never at rest. It's rather nice to know that someplace within we remember everything that caught our attention; even when we weren't conscious of it. Learning to tap into this well of information comes with lots of practice and the willingness to get quiet, really quiet.

It's our attitudes that make play of work. Keeping our thoughts and composure joyful prevents even the dullest task from boring us. Being open to the possibility that fun is an outlook we can foster changes us quite profoundly. It also keeps the channel to our interior imagination uncluttered with the negative. We will always know how to proceed in every instance if we let our inner knowing guide us. The subconscious imagination is never asleep.

My inner self stands at attention always. I will let it answer my questions and make my decisions.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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March 23

Embracing virtues and new attitudes

Because of our addiction, our actions (and inaction) have fostered cynicism, futility, and distrust. How could we ever have hoped to succeed with attitudes like that?

Now we are cultivating the virtues of understanding, love, and patience. It is often slow and difficult. We know that our Higher Power loves us and will lead us, if we only ask.

Am I developing new virtues?

Higher Power, take my hand and lead me from the old attitudes toward new virtues.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

[bluidkiti]

March 24

Fantasies are more than substitutes for unpleasant reality; they are also dress rehearsals, plans. All acts performed in the world begin in the imagination.
--Barbara Grizzuti Harrison

Our minds mold who we become. Our thoughts not only contribute to our achievements, they determine the posture of our lives. How very powerful they are. Fortunately, we have the power to think the thoughts we choose, which means our lives will unfold much as we expect.

The seeds we plant in our minds indicate the directions we'll explore in our development. And we won't explore areas we've never given attention to in our reflective moments. We must dare to dream extravagant, improbable dreams if we intend to find a new direction, and the steps necessary to it.

We will not achieve, we will not master that which goes unplanned in our dream world. We imagine first, and then we conceive the execution of a plan. Our minds prepare us for success. They can also prepare us for failure if we let our thoughts become negative.

I can succeed with my fondest hopes. But I must believe in my potential for success. I will ponder the positive today.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

[bluidkiti]

March 25

In wildness is the preservation of the world.
- Henry David Thoreau

Nature confronts us with its beauty in a flower or a furry animal. The awesomeness of nature is in a lightning bolt or a majestic mountain. Every variety of tree has its own uniquely textured bark. Each annual ring in a tree trunk is a natural record of the growing conditions in each year it grew. These things remind us we are not in charge, and we are moved by the experience.

This "wildness" is everywhere around us, and we are renewed by it when we interact with it. At night, in the city, we look up and see the ancient moon. When we live with a pet, it reminds us we are creatures too. We are part of this larger whole. We don't just appreciate nature -- we are nature. When we open our eyes and learn to be a part of it, it renews and lifts our spirits.

Today, I will notice my relationship with the sun and moon, with the plants and animals in my world.



You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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March 26

Everyone has his own fingerprints. The white light streams down to be broken up by those human prisms into all the colors of the rainbow. Take your own color in the pattern and be just that.
--Charles R. Brown

We are often amazed at how different members of the same family seem to be. Contrasts are often great: one child might be loud and funny, one might be timid and quiet, and yet neither seems to take after the parents.

A family is like a vegetable garden. The vegetables respond to outside influences. The one exposed to more sunlight will grow differently than the one growing in a damp, shady place. Vegetables growing in crowded areas of the garden may not be as developed as those around them, but they might be tastier.

Although we may have common roots, outside experiences and friends mold us too, making each of us unique. We sometimes lose ourselves by comparisons and feel as if we don't belong, but the variety of our family garden is what makes the world so interesting.

How can I honor another person's uniqueness today?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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March 27

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.
--Step One of Alcoholics Anonymous

Accepting powerlessness is a prerequisite of recovery. As adult children, the very idea may seem puzzling or even laughable. Haven't we felt powerless all along? Shouldn't we be trying to move away from powerlessness and toward power?

But in the program we've found powerless to have a different meaning. We see how we have exhausted all the nonproductive, ineffective ways to deal with our situation. Powerlessness here means we're giving up on willpower, force, and intellectualizing because they just didn't work.

When we admit we are powerless we are saying that we are through trying to do it on our own - finished with attempts at recovery, which are centered around our own strength or cunning. To lay down our old failed powers is not much different, after all, from laying down a broken old bike with two flat tires. It was better than nothing, but now we have a new means of moving on our way.

Today, I am relieved and grateful to unburden myself of unrealistic expectations.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

[bluidkiti]

March 28

People-Pleasing

For some of us, people-pleasing has become a way of getting our needs and wants met. But people-pleasing is manipulative and condescending. And it cheats us. When we are busy pleasing others, we are not being true to ourselves (nor those we are pleasing).

Rather than manipulating people, let us simply ask for what we need and want. We are all lovable and deserving, just as we are. We can truly please ourselves and others by simply being ourselves.

Do I ask honestly for what I want or need today?

Thought for the Day

The path to true connection is to be myself. The path to getting what I need is to ask for it.

You are reading from the book:

A Restful Mind by Mark Allen Zabawa

[bluidkiti]

March 29

I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And never a word said she;
But, Oh, the things I learned from her
When Sorrow walked with me!
-- Robert Browning Hamilton

We may think that forgetting the past is essential for growth and peace of mind. It's a tempting idea: we'll start over again, we think, fresh and new. But if we lose that old pain, we'll also lose all that we learned. We may repeat our mistakes, or make even worse ones next time. Dwelling on the past is equally dangerous. We began recovery to build a better life.

To find and maintain our balance, each area of our lives needs attention. A healthy mind in a healthy body is free to find God. And, with God's help, we can learn to recognize and forgive our past mistakes, while we keep the remarkable lessons we learned from life.

With our remembering, with our inventory, we can truly experience the repentance that frees us from regret and remorse. When we acknowledge our mistakes, we can learn from them and come to forgive ourselves.

Today help me use my memories to learn and change. Help me to forgive my past.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

[bluidkiti]

March 30

I usually just lived one day at a time. I never had a sense of where I was going.
--Ruth Casey

Did any of us really know where we were going? We probably spent many hours, days, weeks even, making detailed plans for the people around us. These plans didn't usually suit others so they didn't often materialize. God, however, always had a plan in store for each of us, although sometimes we were the last to know it.

Is there any reason to think that anything has changed? Not really. We're still here, so that means God is still in charge of whatever should transpire today. Our part is to be willing to listen to God's direction and to follow it. We don't have to know where our steps are leading us. We can simply move forward, trusting that we will end up where we need to be.

We may have complicated our lives for too many years. That's not unusual. Busy people tend to do that. What we needed to do, where we needed to go, was always under the direction of God. It still is. Let's rejoice that our part is doable.

Living one day at a time works best. I'll give up thoughts of all else today.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

[bluidkiti]

March 31

Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this, you are dreadfully like other people.
-- James Russell Lowell

Sharing our many experiences with our friends in Twelve Step meetings helps us understand how very similar we all are. We are unique only in the sense that each of us has a special contribution to make in life, one not quite like anyone else's.

Keeping secrets from others can make us fearful. We think. Could they really like me if they knew this? Yet we feel profound relief when we share our most shameful secrets in a meeting and the men and women listening to us don't blink an eye.

We no longer find rewards from pretending we're someone we're not. Our greatest reward now is the peace we experience from not having anything to hide. We have learned genuine humility and that we are equals with other people. No better, no worse.

Today I will enjoy the serenity of having no more secrets and will celebrate my humanity.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey