Today's Thought - April

[bluidkiti]

April 1

AA Thought for the Day

In the story of the Good Samaritan, the wayfarer fell among robbers and was left lying in the gutter, half dead. And a priest and a Levite both passed by on the other side of the road. But the Good Samaritan was moved with compassion and came to him and bound up his wounds and brought him to an inn and took care of him. Do I treat another alcoholic like the priest and the Levite or like the Good Samaritan?
Meditation for the Day

Never weary in prayer. When one day you see how unexpectedly your prayer has been answered, then you will deeply regret that you have prayed so little. Prayer changes things for you. Practice praying until your trust in God has become strong. And then pray on, because it has become so much a habit that you need it daily. Keep praying until prayer seems to become communion with God. That is the note on which true times of prayer should end.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may form the habit of daily prayer. I pray that I may find the strength I need as a result of this communion.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day: A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life*

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April 2

I celebrate myself, and sing myself, and what I assume, you shall assume.

~Walt Whitman

Some of us may think Walt Whitman must have been terribly conceited to have written words like that. But he wasn't. He knew himself well, and accepted himself, even his darker side. He could laugh at himself and celebrate his humanness.

And because he loved and accepted himself just as he was, others could do the same. That's difficult to understand sometimes, but it's true: no one else is going to love and accept us until we come to love and accept ourselves.

We teach others how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves, so perhaps it makes sense to apply a variation of the Golden Rule: "Do unto ourselves as we would have others do unto us."

Can I allow my kindness to myself overflow to another person today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families*

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April 3

When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.

~Ernest Hemingway

It's hard to listen in a complete way. Often we listen, but we're still thinking about ourselves. We wonder, "How do their words relate to me? Do I have anything to add?" Often, fear is behind these questions. We fear saying the wrong thing. We fear looking stupid.

Good listeners know how to let go. They let go of their fears. To listen completely, we step outside ourselves, and we're totally there for someone else. Sometimes we listen for only a few moments. Sometimes we don't even agree with the people we're listening to. But we let them know that they count. What a gift we give when we listen in a complete way!
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, teach me to listen in a complete way. Teach me to step outside myself and be there for others.
Action for the Day

Today I'll listen to what the person says.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple: Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal*

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April 4

I will thank you because I am marvelously made; your works are wonderful, and I know it well.

~Psalms 139:14

Some days we feel bad about ourselves. Perhaps there is no real reason except that a mood has come over us. Moodiness is a remnant of our past. Or perhaps we feel guilty or ashamed or hurt. We feel blue. We feel grouchy toward ourselves, toward others around us, toward the world.

This is a time to turn it over to our Higher Power. We are children of the universe. We are loved. Our Creator has endowed us with marvelous strengths and potentials. Today may be a day we allow ourselves to be carried along by the love of our Higher Power. If we reach out, we will feel the presence of the spirit in our contact with other people. We need not try so hard. We only need to pray for openness within ourselves to feel the love of God.

I pray for help today to renew the feeling within that God loves me and never abandons me.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men*

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April 5

Recovering Out Loud

I don't know about you, but my recovery started when I spoke the truth aloud. Speaking it aloud to somebody else gave it flight, lifted it up and away. Recovering out loud might mean you tell just one person that you are in recovery from suicidal ideation, depression, anxiety, or substance use.

It doesn't mean you have to start an international movement. It doesn't mean that you reveal your recovery on social media or the front page of the local newspaper. It might just mean that when somebody around you is talking about a personal struggle or something a family member is going through, you turn to them and say, "I have some personal experience with that. Do you mind if I share?" When you do share in this way, you will be helping one another and also helping to eliminate stigma.

Here's the thing: our voices matter. As we grow prouder in our recovery, we grow louder in it too. The reason I recover out loud is to lead other women into recovery, to reach those suffering in silence. I want to help them so their words can take flight too.

Words matter. Especially when we speak them out loud.

Today's reading is from the book She Recovers Every Day: Meditations for Women*

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April 6

Having realistic expectations

Sometimes we expect much too much of people and things. We will never be happy if we expect our doctor to work instant cures or if we blame our teacher for what we failed to learn. We need to examine what's realistic to expect of others and what we are responsible for ourselves. It's the same with the program: we cannot judge its effectiveness by whether we are happy all the time.

The program will be perfect only when we are perfect. We must let go of our childish all-or-nothing attitude and become more realistic. After all, when were we ever happy all the time?

Do I expect too much?

Higher Power, when I am unhappy with the program, help me be honest with myself about where the problem lies.

Today I will examine my expectations about...

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*

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April 7

It Takes What It Takes

In 1986, I was suffering the fallout of multiple affairs that my now-ex-wife was having. I was not handling this situation very well.

Long story short, I accidentally fired a gun into the couch of the living room. Not on purpose. I was drinking at the time. Because everybody cleans their guns while they're drinking scotch on the rocks, right? You know, that's at least what I thought.

But this incident did scare me. It made me think about my drinking, and I decided to go to AA. I liked it! I wasn't drinking, I was feeling good, and I was healthy. For six weeks. Then I figured, Okay, I've got this! I can do this on my own.

I didn't get sober then. But it did kick off the beginning of my journey, and I ended up where I am today. Now I sponsor people and I am sober myself.

Today I will recognize that it takes what it takes to get sober. I won't regret the journey it has taken me to get here.

~Ed C., U.S. Army, 1975–1979

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*

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April 8

Reflection for the Day

Rare are the practicing alcoholics and addicts who have any idea how irrational they are or, seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it. One reason is that they are abetted in their blindness by a world that doesn't yet understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism, sane substance use and addiction. The dictionary defines sanity as "soundness of mind." Yet no addict or alcoholic, soberly analyzing their destructive behavior, can truly claim soundness of mind. Have I come to believe, as the Second Step suggests, that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity?
Today I Pray

May I see that my own behavior as a practicing alcoholic, a drug user, or a compulsive overeater could be described as "insane." For those still actively addicted, admitting to "insane" behavior is well-nigh impossible. I pray that I may continue to abhor the insanities and inanities of my addictive days. May others like me recognize their problems of addiction, find help in treatment and in the program, and come to believe that a Higher Power can restore them to sanity.
Today I Will Remember

My Higher Power always restores my soul.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

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April 9

What does it mean to be "awakened spiritually"?

Many of us believe in God. Most cultures in this world, in fact, believe in a supreme being. But simply believing in a Higher Power is not the same as being spiritually awake. Formally, spiritually awake means having a two-way relationship with God. Informally it means having a friendship that keeps our hope for a better life alive.

Now we no longer pray to a distant, unseen God. We talk, each day, with the God of our understanding.

Being active in the most important relationship we have is what keeps us awake spiritually. That, in turn, is what fosters every positive change, every aspect of growth we experience.

My chat with God today will keep me on track and firm in my understanding of the power of God's presence.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

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April 10

I realized I was going to survive this loss. I learned that no matter how great my pain, or how alone and frightened I feel, I have only to remember.

~Raymond Berger

When we're suffering, we may think that we're never going to feel relief. We may forget that we have already survived our past, and that joy has followed pain over and over again. We may neglect to use the resources within us and surrounding us that can help through times of pain.

Prayer, creative expression, visiting nature, sharing feelings with people we trust, giving help and service to others, even performing simple meditative tasks like washing dishes or sweeping a floor - all these have helped put broken hearts back together.

To be alive is to feel. We don't have to numb or deny our feelings of pain or loss. We can respect and acknowledge whatever we're feeling without fear. In time, we are healed.

Today, I remember that I have always lived through pain. I remember the many resources that help me to heal.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day

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April 11

Being Vulnerable

Part of recovery means learning to share ourselves with other people. We learn to admit our mistakes and expose our imperfections - not so that others can fix us, rescue us, or feel sorry for us, but so we can love and accept ourselves. This sharing is a catalyst in healing and changing.

Many of us are fearful of sharing our imperfections because that makes us vulnerable. Some of us have tried being vulnerable in the past, and people tried to control, manipulate, or exploit us, or they made us feel ashamed.

Some of us in recovery have hurt ourselves by being vulnerable. We may have shared things with people who didn't respect our confidence. Or we may have told the wrong people at an inappropriate time, and scared them away.

We learn from our mistakes - and despite our mistakes, it is still a good thing to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and honest. We can learn to choose safe people with whom to share ourselves. We can learn to share appropriately so we don't scare or push people away. We can also learn to let others be vulnerable with us.

Today, God, help me learn to be appropriately vulnerable. I will not let others exploit or shame me for being vulnerable, and I will not exploit myself.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*

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Apeil 12

Inches make champions.

~Vince Lombardi

What's the difference between success and failure? Ideal conditions? Fifty percent more effort? Twice the talent? Ten times "the breaks"? Or is it simply that some people have what it takes and some people don't?

Vince Lombardi, the football coach who brought the Green Bay Packers from fifteen losing seasons to successive world championships, thought success was a matter of inches. A bit more concentration, one extra push in practice, a consistent second effort for a tiny additional gain. He didn't ask his players to be something other than they were - he asked them to improve their best an inch at a time. He knew inches add up in life as in sports.

In life as in football, it is often the little things that count: going to meetings when we feel like staying home, or speaking our minds, no matter how insignificant our opinion may seem. When we feel like simply hiding - inches make the difference.

Today, I will be aware that I am a champion in the making. I may not make a complete turnaround today, but I will make progress.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy: Daily Meditations for Adult Children*

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April 13

All day, where the sunlight played on the seashore, Life sat.

~Olive Schreiner

When we let ourselves, we look around and feel a deep sense of respect for life and our part in it. The land - its majesty and sustenance - children, pets, doing something we love: all of these nourish our spirit.

It's important to find the things that nurture our spirit and seek them out, and it's important to keep widening the possibilities for awakening our spirit. The excitement that arises from a moment of connection is wonderful to feel.

Although the moment can be simple, something we wouldn't have noticed in the past, we can now feel its reality. The deepest part of us reaches out to something or someone else, and we are connected. Intimacy with life renews life.

God, please help me today to say yes to the beauty, people, and experiences in my life.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart

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April 14

Service

Love is the forgetting of oneself in the service of another.

~R. Ainsley Barnwell

Any act of "carrying the message" can serve a useful purpose, whether or not we see the results. Our home group carries the message and observes the Fifth Tradition.

If we maintain an attitude of being of service with love, we can work wonders at any time and every moment of a day. Through our Twelve Step program, we become aware that we have the opportunity of being an example of happy, joyous, and free living without the crutch of our addiction. This "face" we present can be a positive model for anyone who comes in contact with us.

If we confine our activities to only those persons who seek our help, we might miss the chance of influencing someone who isn't the direct target of our "service of love."

Today I will use the gifts my Higher Power and the program have given me to be of service to others.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It: A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations*

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April 15

You can't hold a man down without staying down with him.

~Booker T. Washington

It seems that when we're not feeling good about ourselves, we're more prone to gossip about others or criticize even our dearest friends.

Or some days we may think we're in a pretty good place, and suddenly we begin taking someone else's inventory. We then discover that the ground under us has moved; we're no longer in a good place. Criticism breeds personal discontent. Our negative attitude toward ourselves or others multiplies and soon touches everyone we're in contact with.

Fortunately, acts of love also multiply. We can inspire at least two people right now through a loving deed or thought - ourselves and the nearest friend. More importantly, any act of genuine kindness is guaranteed to create a ripple of kindness that will finally reach the other side of town, maybe even the far side of the universe.

I will do my part today to spread love to the far reaches of the world.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care: Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery*

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April 16

To show great love for God and our neighbor, we need not do great things.

~Mother Teresa

We don't have to invent a cure for cancer or lift the burdens of a friend to prove our worth to other people. Being considerate of someone's feelings is quite enough, and it is something any of us can do. It takes only a moment's thought and the willingness to treat others as we'd like them to treat us. The real blessing is that we feel much better each time our heart guides our actions.

Loving others is perhaps the simplest of all actions we can take in this life. It requires no planning, no money, no muscle power, no problem solving. It's a simple decision we can make daily or hourly. Every person we encounter, every situation we face, is an opportunity for us to hone the skill. And every loving act or thought makes the world a better place.

It's human nature to treat others as we are treated. If each of us becomes willing to offer the hand of love to someone else today, we will indeed have done a great thing!

I can make a worthwhile contribution today. I can be kind to a stranger.

Today's reading is from the book A Woman's Spirit: More meditations for Women*

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April 17

Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of good luck.

~H. Jackson Brown Jr.

Managing desires is one of the most crucial elements of being an adult. Children want many things that aren't good for them, and their impulses can often get them into trouble. They need loving, caring adults to protect them from the harm that can come from getting what they want.

As adults, our spiritual development includes learning how to regard our desires and how to manage them. On the one hand, it isn't healthy to become so controlled and repressed that we never let ourselves have fun, and on the other hand, we know that indulging every desire will kill us.

Sometimes we want something very badly and when we don't get it, we feel desperate or very disappointed. However, life continuously points us in directions we hadn't expected. Disappointment can serve to reset our lives. Not getting our desires, if we keep our eyes open, points us in directions that can be better than what we had imagined for ourselves.

Today, I will be open to the new directions that life points me toward.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones: More Daily Meditations for Men*

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April 18

AA Thought for the Day

In following the AA program with its Twelve Steps, we have the advantage of a better understanding of our problems. Day after day our sobriety results in the formation of new habits, normal habits. As each twenty-four-hour period ends, we find that the business of staying sober is a much less trying and fearsome ordeal than it seemed in the beginning. Do I find it easier as I go along?
Meditation for the Day

Learn daily the lesson of trust and calm in the midst of the storms of life. Whatever of sorrow or difficulty the day may bring, God's command to you is the same. Be grateful, humble, calm, and loving to all people. Leave each soul the better for having met you or heard you. For all kinds of people, this should be your attitude: a loving desire to help and an infectious spirit of calmness and trust in God. You have the answer to loneliness and fear, which is calm faith in the goodness and purpose in the universe.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be calm in the midst of storms. I pray that I may pass on this calmness to others who are lonely and full of fear.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day: A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life*

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April 19

Live robustly

Even when you’re surrounded by apathy and incompetence, avoid letting it absorb you. Remain true to who you are and the good you can do.

When nearly everyone else seems to be making flimsy excuses and getting away with carelessness, it’s tempting to go along. It can make you question why you should bother to distinguish yourself when no one else is doing so.

Yet life is about more than merely what you can get away with. You gain great richness with what you accomplish, the positive impact you have, the value that’s generated by your actions.

Every approaching moment offers a choice. You can either coast through with minimal effort, or you can wisely invest your full attention, energy, and action.

Whatever anyone else may or may not be doing, you have the opportunity to live robustly. In any circumstance, in every stretch of time, you can add meaning and fulfillment to life.

Seize the opportunity, now and always, to act as if life has great potential. Continue proving to yourself and others that it does indeed.

— Ralph Marston

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families*

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April 20

One meets one's destiny often on the road one takes to avoid it.

~French proverb

None of us, perhaps, ever thought we'd end up in recovery. But we were working at joining recovery years before we got here! Maybe recovery was our fate from the day we first took a drink or a pill. Others around us could see the writing on the wall, but we couldn't. We were too busy trying to avoid pain.

Alcoholism and other drug abuse have to do with us trying to find spiritual wholeness - the kind of spiritual wholeness we're finding now … in recovery. So let's welcome recovery into our lives. We have found our spiritual home.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, I got lost because I acted like I knew the way to a good life. You lead the way. Thank You for putting me on the right track.
Action for the Day

Today I'll think about why it's my fate to be in recovery. I will list ways that I try to avoid my fate.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple: Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal*

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April 21

Do not reveal your thoughts to everyone, lest you drive away your good luck.

~Apocrypha, Ecclesiasticus 8:19

We've had problems in our lives with limits. We have done some things to excess, and others we have endlessly postponed. Sometimes we haven't had good judgment about what we ought to tell someone or whom we ought to tell. We may have kept secrets that made us lonely and sick. Other times we exposed too much in inappropriate situations and hurt someone else or ourselves. Developing these internal limits is a quiet change that comes with recovery. Gradually, we gain a stronger feeling of self-respect and become more intuitive about when to express something and when not to.

Secrets are links in our chains of bondage to isolation, addiction, and codependency. On the other hand, when we feel compelled to tell everything, we lack the feeling of self-containment that comes from maturity. We need a sense of privacy: the freedom to choose what and when to confide in a friend. What does our intuition tell us today about our privacy and our openness?

Today, I will listen to my inner messages about what I need to discuss with others, and what I need to withhold.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men*

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April 22

The Issues Live in Our Tissues

I thought that talk therapy would heal every part of me that needed healing. I was wrong. Making sense of our past negative experiences, including our traumas, requires a sense-based healing approach. As my friend Nikki Myers, creator of Yoga 12 Step Recovery, has long said, "The issues live in our tissues." I wish this weren't true, but I do know now that stress trapped in our body is best discharged through sensorimotor (sense- and movement-based) practice. Trauma-informed yoga is one of the best modalities for healing; so, too, is breathwork (although it can be triggering if not practiced carefully).

I prefer gentle movements like stretching and walking, which are easier for this asthmatic. My friend Payton will tell you that mindful dance should be in everybody's movement practice, and I tend to agree that it works well. Of course, sports and other exercise can help move energy that needs to be displaced too. As with all things in recovery, you get to choose how to move your body into wellness.

Movement is our friend when we choose movement that feels right for us.

Today's reading is from the book She Recovers Every Day: Meditations for Women*

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April 23

Working for peace of mind

To stay clear of mood-altering substances, we must keep our thoughts close to our Higher Power. If we stay close, we will know peace but not necessarily leisure.

The work of recovery is hard, but our rewards are many and much more lasting than the immediate gratification we sought in the past.

Am I finding peace of mind?

Higher Power, help me stay close to you and remember why I must work on my recovery.

Three ways I can work for peace of mind today are…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*

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April 24

I Choose Sobriety

At sixteen months dry, I relapsed, and the squadron sent me to the galley for temporary additional duty. It was there that I met my first husband. He relapsed. I relapsed. We got married. I ended up getting pregnant again.

He went out for a short thirty-day deployment. I knew that if I didn't start going back to AA before he came back home, I probably wasn't going to ever get back into it. I went to a meeting. My husband was due to get back the next morning. I picked him up from the boat, and I was like, "Look, this is what's happening. I'm back in recovery."

He was not interested in any way, shape, or form. We stayed together, technically, for maybe a year after that - but it just was not working. Today my sobriety date is still November 23, 1986.

Though my relationships may change during my recovery, my sobriety remains my priority.

~Mary H., U.S. Navy, 1984–2004

Today's reading is from the book Leave No One Behind: Daily meditations for Military Service Members and Veterans in Recovery*

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April 25

Reflection for the Day

"Vision is, I think, the ability to make good estimates," wrote Bill W., the cofounder of Alcoholics Anonymous. "Some might feel this sort of striving to be heresy against 'One day at a time.' But that valuable principle really refers to our mental and emotional lives, and means chiefly that we are not foolishly to repine over the past nor wishfully daydream about the future. "Can I believe that "A day has a hundred pockets when one has much to put in them"?
Today I Pray

I pray that the bright colors of this day may not be blurred by muted vagaries of the future or dulled by storm-gray remnants from the past. I pray that my Higher Power will help me to choose my actions and concerns out of the wealth of busyness that each day offers.
Today I Will Remember

I will not lose for today, If I choose for today.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

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April 26

Asking God for help is a sign of strength, not of weakness.

Before joining the program we didn't think we could ask anyone else for help. We mistakenly thought it was a sign of weakness and we had to be strong. How scared we were on occasion, and yet how unwilling we were to ask for help.

Coming to the program was our first step in breaking through the barrier. Since then, our willingness to continue asking for help has given us hope and growth we would never have attained otherwise.

Step Seven suggests that we ask God for the help we need. For some of us, it's easier to ask God for help than a human being. But the real lesson here is simply the asking. Admitting that we need help, that we can't do anything alone, makes us aware of our connection to all of life. That makes us peaceful. We feel secure. We belong. We are like others: We need them, and they us.

I will know that all is well today if I turn to God for whatever help I need. I don't need to do anything all alone.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

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April 27

I seem to have an awful lot of people inside me.

~Edith Evans

We all know the experience of indecision. When we're torn between two alternatives, we may sometimes feel as if we don't have the right to have such conflict within ourselves. We may force ourselves to make a decision before we're ready.

One way to deal with a dilemma is to embrace it. Rather than pressure ourselves to come to a premature conclusion, we can acknowledge our conflict. We can say simply, "This is a dilemma for me right now. I can't make a decision until I'm clear about what's right for me."

Whether a dilemma concerns work or relationships, conflicting pleasures or responsibilities, we need not create the drama of an instant positive or negative reaction. Once we are able to acknowledge our dilemma, it begins to become clear which action is most appropriate for us to take.

Today, I can allow myself ambivalent feelings. I can take my time with a decision.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day

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April 28

I still have bad days. But that's okay. I used to have bad years.

~Anonymous

Sometimes, the old feelings creep back in. We may feel fearful, ashamed, and hopeless. We may feel not good enough, unlovable, victimized, helpless, and resentful about it all. This is codependency, a condition some describe as "soul-sickness."

Many of us felt this way when we began recovery. Sometimes, we slip back into these feelings after we've begun recovery. Sometimes there's a reason. An event may trigger these reactions, such as ending a relationship, stress, problems on the job, at home, or in friendships. Times of change can trigger these reactions. So can physical illness.

Sometimes, these feelings return for no reason. A return to the old feelings doesn't mean we're back to square one in our recovery. They do not mean we've failed at recovery. They do not mean we're in for a long, painful session of feeling badly. They just are there.

The solution is the same: practicing the basics. Some of the basics are loving and trusting our self, detachment, dealing with feelings, giving and receiving support in the recovery community, using our affirmations, and having fun.

Another basic is working the Steps. Often, working the Steps is how we become enabled and empowered to practice the other basics, such as detachment and self-love. If the old feelings come back, know for certain there is a way out that will work.

Today, if I find myself in the dark pit of codependency, I will work a Step to help myself climb out.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*