bluidkiti
07-08-2023, 07:16 AM
God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
and Wisdom to know the difference.
Thy will, not mine, be done.
July 9
Daily Reflections
I AM AN INSTRUMENT
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
12 & 12, p.70
The subject of humility is a difficult one. Humility is not thinking
less of myself than I ought to; it is acknowledging that I do certain
things well, it is accepting a compliment graciously. God can only do
for me what He can do through me. Humility is the result of knowing
that God is the doer, not me. In the light of awareness, how can I take
pride in my accomplishments? I am an instrument and any work I
seem to be doing is being done by God through me. I ask God on a
daily basis to remove my shortcomings, in order that I may more freely
go about my A.A. business of "love and service."
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Disillusionment and spiritual confusion mark our age. Many of us
have cast aside old ideas without acquiring new ones. Many men
and women are creeping through life on their hands and knees,
merely because they refuse to rely on any power but themselves.
Many of them feel that they are being brave and independent, but
actually they are only courting disaster. Anxiety and the inferiority
complex have become the greatest of all modern plagues. In A.A.
we have the answer to these ills. Have I ceased to rely on myself
only?
Meditation For The Day
Disillusionment and doubt spoil life. The doubting ones are the
disillusioned ones. When you are in doubt, you are on the fence.
You are not going anywhere. Doubt poisons all action. "Well. I
don't know"--so you don't know anything. You should meet life
with a "Yes," an affirmative attitude. There is good in the world
and we can follow that good. There is power available to help us to
do the right thing; therefore we will accept that power. There are
miracles of change in people's lives; therefore we will accept
those miracles as evidence of God's power.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I will not be paralyzed by doubt. I pray that I may go along
on the venture of faith.
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As Bill Sees It
The A.A. Way in the Home*, p. 190
Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his
family. You should continue to be friendly to them, explaining A.A.'s concept of
alcoholism and its treatment. If they accept this and also apply our principles to their
problems, there is a much better chance that the head of the family will recover. And
even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable.
********************************
Unless a new member's family readily expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles,
we think he ought not to urge them. They will change in time. His behavior will usually
convince them far more than his words.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 97
2. p. 83
*Today, the initiation of the A.A. way of life in the home is the central purpose of the Al-Anon
Family Groups of which there are (as of 1984) over 22,000 throughout the world. These are
composed of wives, husbands, and relatives of alcoholics. In restoring families to the good life,
Alan's success has been enormous.
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Walk In Dry Places
What is the real cause?
Motivations.
Bringing her alcoholic husband home from a treatment center, a woman was dismayed when an argument ensued and he left the car in a rage. She blamed herself and their argument when he finally arrived home, DRUNK.
Seasoned veterans of alcoholic games will quickly understand that the argument had no part in “causing” the alcoholic to drink. Instead, the argument was something he started as a means of getting away from his wife. He still wanted and needed to drink.
In dealing with our compulsive illnesses, we must separate our excuses from what’s really going on. Arguments do not cause alcoholics to drink, but they can be used as convenient devices for getting our way.
I must take responsibility for my own behavior. If I have chosen sobriety, no person and no event can cause me to drink.
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Keep It Simple
First say to yourself what you would be: and then do what you have to do. - Eptctetus
We often tell ourselves we want to be more peaceful, more in touch with our Higher Power. In other words, we want to become more spiritual. Acting as spiritual people is hard. Tho often, we choose the easy way. We make a nasty comment even if we know it'll only make things worse.
We say we have a program for living. Are we living our program? We'll find the answer in our behavior. Sober people act in sober ways. We attend meetings regularly. We study spiritual ideas. We work to bring joy to our lives and the lives of others. Just as we know a good friend by the way he or she behaves, we know a sober person by the way he or she behaves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be a person whose words and actions match up.
Today's Action: Today I'll take an inventory of my actions to see if they are those of a sober person.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
BILL'S STORY
I had always believed in a power greater than myself. I had often pondered these things. I was not an atheist. Few people really are, for that means blind faith in the strange proposition that this universe originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. My intellectual heroes, the chemists, the astronomers, even the evolutionists, suggested vast laws and forces at work. Despite contrary indications, I had little doubt that a mighty purpose and rhythm underlay all. How could there be so much of precise and immutable law, and no intelligence? I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. But that was as far as I had gone.
p. 10
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
FREEDOM FROM BONDAGE - Young when she joined, this A.A. believes her serious drinking was the result of even deeper defects. She here tells how she was free.
The last three years of my drinking, I drank on my job. The amount of willpower exercised to control my drinking during working hours, diverted into a constructive channel, would have made me president, and the thing that made the willpower possible was the knowledge that as soon as my day was finished, I could drink myself into oblivion. Inside, though, I was scared to death, for I knew that the time was coming (and it couldn't be too remote) when I would be unable to hold that job. Maybe I wouldn't be able to hold any job, or maybe (and this was my greatest fear) I wouldn't care whether I had a job or not. I knew it didn't make any difference where I started, the inevitable end would be skid row. The only reality I was able to face had been forced upon me by its very repetition--I had to drink; and I didn't know there was anything in the world that could be done about it.
pp. 547-548
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Six - "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
THE moment we saw that we had an answer for alcoholism, it was reasonable (or so it seemed at the time) for us to feel that we might have the answer to a lot of other things. The A.A. groups, many thought, could go into business, might finance any enterprise whatever in the total field of alcoholism. In fact, we felt duty-bound to throw the whole weight of the A.A. name behind any meritorious cause.
p. 155
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During the time of the darkest night, act as if the morning has already
come.
--The Talmud
The spiritual journey involves going beyond hope and fear, stepping
into unknown territory, continually moving forward. The most
important aspect of being on the spiritual path may be just to keep
moving.
--Pema Chodron
God is my life, I express health, God is my supply, I express
abundance, God is trust, I express faith.
--SweetyZee
No one gives me worry, nothing causes me fear, I release them, and
trust Gods outcomes.
--SweetyZee
I am steadfast in my loyalty to God and truth.
--SweetyZee
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PESSIMISM
"There is no sadder sight than a
young pessimist."
--Mark Twain
I meet so many young people who have "aged" because of their
drug addiction. They have lost that "spark" of youth that is both
creative and hopeful. They reveal in their eyes a "powerlessness"
that keeps them prisoners of lethargy. They don't want to do
anything. They mumble rather than speak. They walk with no
purpose: young zombies! Addiction breeds pessimism.
Recovery is realizing that life need not be like this. True joy and
happiness comes with the experience of self, rather than the
confused experiences of chemicals. Reality is facing the pain and
problems in order to rediscover the dynamic spirituality of a
drug-free life. The "yes" to life begins with the "no" to drugs.
Happiness and confidence are discovered in the "yes" to life.
Let me see beyond the gloom to the promised sunrise of tomorrow.
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"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:13
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and
effective."
James 5:16
"Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the
name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will
receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."
Acts 2:38
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our
sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I John 1:9
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Daily Inspiration
We often don't realize how heavy the weight of worry is and how much energy it requires until we are able to let go of it. Lord, I place my trust in You to clear my thinking, help me resolve my concerns and bring me to a place of peace.
Keep yourself young in spirit always by thinking new thoughts and getting rid of old habits. Lord, may my spirit never become frail and my abilities never become barren.
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NA Just For Today
We Do Recover!
"....the time has come when that tired old lie, 'Once an addict, always an addict,' will no longer be tolerated by either society or the addict himself. We do recover."
Basic Text, p.86
From time to time, we hear speakers share that they don't really understand spiritual principles yet. They tell us that if we knew what went on in their minds, we'd be amazed at how insane they still are. They tell us that the longer they're clean, the less they know about anything. In the next breath, these same speakers tell us about the profound changes recovery has made in their lives. They have moved from complete despair to unfailing hope, from uncontrollable drug use to total abstinence, from chronic unmanageability to responsibility through working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous. Which story is true? Do we or don't we recover?
We may think we demonstrate humility or gratitude by underplaying the change that recovery has brought to our lives. True, we do injustice to the program when we take credit for this miracle ourselves. But we do an equal injustice-to ourselves and to those we share with-when we don't acknowledge this miracle's magnitude.
We do recover. If we have trouble seeing the miracle of recovery, we'd better look again. Recovery is alive and at work in Narcotics Anonymous-in our old-timers, in the newcomers flooding our meetings, and most of all in ourselves. All we have to do is open our eyes.
Just for today: I will acknowledge the miracle of my recovery and be grateful that I've found it.
pg. 199
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. --Dorothy Canfield Fisher
A strong, healthy tree is one which is free to grow straight and tall. A weak tree often must lean against another for support. It is not that different with people. We are not healthy and strong when we must always lean on another to support us.
This doesn't mean it isn't healthy to accept help. But the best help we can get or give is that which enables us to do things without it. Sometimes we think we lose a relationship when others don't need our help, or when we don't need theirs all the time. The reverse is true. Only when we are each strong enough to stand on our own can we really share the kind of help, which allows both, helped and helper to be independent.
Have I been giving the right kind of help?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. --Herbert Spencer
We sometimes wish we could protect friends or loved ones from the consequences of their actions. We'd like to pick up the pieces after they've made a mess of their lives. Or we fail to look at the dark side of someone's motives because we want only the best. Perhaps it is our controlling willfulness that tries to make things into what we want, rather than accepts things as they really are.
In our masculine recovery, a deeper love allows us to have a respectful distance from others. When we truly care about someone, we don't snatch him or her out of his or her learning experience. When we allow our loved ones and friends to confront the natural consequences of their own actions, they learn and grow just as we do. We can be with a friend, but we are no one's Higher Power.
Today, I will be respectful of others by letting them walk their path while I walk mine.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Overspending and Underspending
I used to beat my husband to death with my credit card. It makes me feel like I had some control, some way to get even with him. --Anonymous
I spent ten years buying everything for myself at garage sales. I didn't even buy myself a new pair of shoes. The entire time I was depriving myself, my husband was gambling, speculating on risky business deals, and doing whatever he wanted with money. I learned that when I made a decision that I deserved to have the things I wanted, and made a decision to buy something I wanted, there was enough money to do it. It wasn't about being frugal; it was about depriving myself, and being a martyr. --Anonymous
Compulsive buying or overspending may give us a temporary feeling of power or satisfaction, but like other out of control behaviors, it has predictable negative consequences.
Under spending can leave us feeling victimized too.
There is a difference between responsible spending and martyred deprivation. There is a difference between treating ourselves well financially and overspending. We can learn to discern that difference. We can develop responsible spending habits that reflect high self esteem and love for ourselves.
Today, I will strive for balance in my spending habits. If I am overspending, I will stop and deal with what's going on inside me. If I am under spending or depriving myself, I will ask myself if that's necessary and what I want.
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
Learn to Focus Your Energy
“I’ve come to this lodge for one reason,” the woman at Breitenbush Retreat in Willamette Forest said. “I brought my fiddle, and I’m not leaving until I can play a bluegrass tune. If I want to get out of here, I’d better learn to play.
There is a time to be open, almost unfocused, as we take in what the world, the universe, is showing us. There is a time to get out of our heads and quietly take the journey our hearts lead us into– following with the openness and wonder of a child.
But there also comes a time to aim our attention and focus our energy on what we want to accomplish. Instead of floundering with scattered thoughts and possibilities, we choose one, then act on it. We stay in step with the natural rhythm, but we’re pulling our scattered attention together and focusing it as part of that rhythm.
To do that, we may have to work through or push away inner distractions. Moving through our inner obstacles enables us to accomplish our goal– whether that’s a task, a particular piece of work, or learning to play the fiddle.
Is there something you want to do? Is your heart urging you to learn something, accomplish something, go somewhere, do something? Make it a goal. Focus your energy. Learn to stay focused until you reach that goal.
Put yourself in the cabin and don’t let yourself out until it’s done.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Stop being a sponge
You don’t have to be an emotional sponge, picking up every feeling around you. Learn to distinguish whether what you’re feeling belongs to you or to somebody else.
Linda has a grown son. Whenever her son is going through a difficult time, Linda takes her son’s emotions on, as if those feelings belonged to her. She’ll talk to her son on the phone for a while. He’ll express himself intensely and powerfully about how he really feels about everything in his life. After all, Linda’s his mom. It’s safe to tell her how he really feels, even if he can’t tell anyone else. Linda may feel fine when she begins talking to her son. But by the end of the conversation, Linda doesn’t feel that good anymore. She may feel angry, upset, or worried– or whatever her son was feeling before he talked to her.
Sometimes we soak up other people’s feelings because we forget to protect ourselves. Often, we do this because of the depth of feeling we have for this person. The remedy for this is the same as it is when we’re dealing with our own emotional stuff. We recognize what we’re feeling. We give that feeling its due. Then we let it go. We squeeze out the sponge.
Sometimes, it just takes the act of recognizing that we’ve taken on another person’s emotions to clear those emotions out. If we strive for awareness, we’ll begin to recognize when the feelings we’re feeling aren’t our own.
Children are often open and unprotected. If we’re going through a lot of feelings around them, they may absorb our emotions,too. It’s important to share our feelings with others and let people talk about their feelings to us. But we need to pay attention. If we’ve picked up someone else’s emotions, we need to let those feelings go.
God, help me know that part of being close to people and loving them means I sometimes take on their feelings. Show me how to protect myself so I can keep my heart open to the people I love without taking on their feelings.
Activity: As children, we may have absorbed emotions from our parents. These emotions can linger with us long into adulthood, shaping our beliefs and our general attitude toward life. These emotions can be tricky. We think they’re our own, but they’re not. They belong to someone else. Ask your Higher Power to show you whether you’ve absorbed any emotions from your parents or other people in your life. Then stay open to the responses you get to this prayer. If any emotions or memories begin popping into your consciousness, go to your journal and write about them. Just document the scene or memory that comes to mind. Then release the emotions. Set them free and let them go. Carrying around someone else’s feelings doesn’t help the other person and it doesn’t help us. You deserve to be free and clear.
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Food for Thought
Tension or Hunger?
How often have we eaten because of tension, rather than hunger? Accepting our need for three measured meals a day with nothing in between establishes a sensible pattern, which satisfies our need for nourishment. When we are tense, we can find ways of relaxing which do not harm our body by making it fat.
Learning to relax the stomach muscles helps get rid of tension hunger. Often when we have eaten too fast because of tension, our stomach continues to send hunger signals after the meal. There has not been enough time for the digestive process to register satisfaction. We can consciously relax the muscles so that the feeling of emptiness will go away.
The best cure for tension is a growing faith in our Higher Power. If we are willing to trust Him in the little things of each day, as well as the big events of our life, we will be able to relax and cultivate serenity.
Dissolve my tension and feed my hunger, I pray.
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Cause for Celebration
Honoring Everyday Life by Madisyn Taylor
Use the good china everyday as today is all that matters.
We all know someone who keeps plastic covers on his or her couch in order to protect it. The irony is that many of these people may live their lives without ever having actually made contact with their own furniture! This is a poignant and somewhat humorous example of the human tendency to try to save things for special occasions, as if everyday life weren’t special enough to warrant the use of nice things. Many of us have had the experience of never wearing a particular piece of clothing in order to keep it nice, only to have it go out of style in the meanwhile.
It’s interesting to think of what it would mean to us if we let ourselves wear our nicest clothes and eat off the good china on a daily basis. We might be sending ourselves the message that every day we are alive is a special day and a cause for celebration, and that we are worth it. There is something uplifting about treating ourselves to the finest of what we have. It is as if we rise to the occasion when we wear our best clothes and set the table beautifully, as if for a very special guest. We are more mindful of where we place things, what we are eating, and who is with us. Using the good china, eating in the dining room, and taking the plastic off the sofa might be an invitation to be more conscious of the beauty and grace inherent in our everyday lives.
If there are things you’ve stashed away for a special occasion—a bottle of special wine, a gorgeous pair of shoes, an antique lace tablecloth—consider taking them out of their hiding places and putting them to use tonight, just because you are alive now to enjoy them, and that’s a great cause for a celebration. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we make only superficial changes in ourselves, and give only lip service to The Program, our progress is slow and the likelihood of relapse great. Our regeneration must take the form of a true spiritual rebirth. It must go very deep, within each character flaw replaced by a new and positive quality. Am I being completely honest with myself in uncovering the faults which hamper my spiritual growth? Am I beginning to replace them with positive qualities?
Today I Pray
May God’s protective hand lead me out of the darkness of my deepest fear — that I could return to being what I do now want to be. Please, God, give me courage to make an honest appraisal of myself. Please help me cultivate my positive qualities and begin to be free of my fears.
Today I Will Remember
I must be reborn in the Spirit.
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One More Day
Should I, after tea and cakes and ices, Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis?
– Thomas Stearns Eliot
Some people call it “dancing around the issue.” After all, if there is a problem to face, we may become embarrassed when it’s time to talk about it. We try so hard to balance the emotional framework of our lives that we hardly want to be the one to bring up what seems to be a taboo topic. What we think, we don’t always state; what we intend, we don’t state clearly; and what we need, we rarely ask for. Our half-truths and mixed messages don’t result in honest communication.
Drug use? Manipulative behavior? Eating disorder? Financial problems? The only way to begin to face a problem is to admit that there is one, to talk about it, and to decide together what steps can be taken to help.
Today, I will face a problem honestly.
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One Day At A Time
CONTROL
“I offer you this prayer for all the difficult relationships in our lives:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change,
The courage to change the person I can,
And the wisdom to know that person is me.”
Rev. Mary Manin Morrissey
My disease tells me that my life would be so much better if people would only do what I tell them to do. If they would listen to me, I could solve all their problems, fix their lives, and everybody would be happy. Why can't they see that our relationships would be better if they'd just do what I say, and not what I do? Don't they realize that I know more than they do about how to run their lives?
Well, luckily for the people in my life, this disease lies. I DON'T know what's best for them. Because I have a disease of compulsion, I don't even know what's best for me. If I had known what was best for me, my life would not have been in shambles like it was before I found the Twelve Steps of recovery.
I had to come to the realization that my life had become unmanageable. Only then could I find a Higher Power to restore sanity to the crazy drama that had become my life ~ and to grant me the serenity which accompanies sanity. Now I realize the only person I can control is myself. I can't make other people change into what I want them to be, nor can I make them do what I think is best for them. Since I've begun letting my Higher Power restore me to sanity, I no longer want to be a control freak. I can't even fathom trying to run another person's life. I have enough on my hands just living my own life; I don't have the strength, knowledge or wisdom to live someone else's. I will always be grateful to my Higher Power for helping me to realize that.
One day at a time...
I will live my own life and allow others to live theirs.
~ Jeff
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Speaking at a dinner given by John D. Rockefeller Jr. to introduce Alcoholics Anonymous to some of his friends, Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick remarked:
'I think that psychologically speaking there is a point of advantage in the approach that is being made in this movement that cannot be duplicated. I suspect that if it is wisely handled - and it seems to be in wise and prudent hands - there are doors of opportunity ahead of this project that may surpass our capacities to imagine.' - Pg. 572 - 4th. Edition - Appendix V - The Religious View On A.A.
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whether serious and conservative or eager and flighty, newcomers often feel no necessity for embracing recovery. REMEMBER, millions have gone before you. You don't have to embrace the 12 steps but embrace something that works for recovery.
I embrace a program of recovery, not my self will, but a program I trust with clean and people that I can see!
Spiritual Transformation
Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person - respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has equal access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it.
I seek truth within myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
A main theme in most spiritual traditions states that the best way to get what you want is to provide it for another. If you want serenity, make it peaceful and serene for another. Do you want a feeling of safety? Provide a safe place for another. Do you want to understand what has happened? Help another to understand.
I teach best what I most need to learn.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The slogans work much better when you decorate your life with them rather than decorating the walls with them.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm getting younger in AA. When I came in I was an old man of thirty, I couldn't walk across the alley. Now at seventy I'm running marathons. - Waggy Bill.
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AA Thought for the Day
July 9
Acceptance
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.
When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation
-- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity
until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation
as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 417
Thought to Ponder . . .
My serenity is directly proportional to my level of acceptance.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change.
~*~A.A. Thoughts For The Day~*~
Attitude
" 'Then I woke up.
I had to admit that AA showed results, prodigious results.
I saw that my attitude regarding these
had been anything but scientific.
It wasn't AA that had the closed mind, it was me.
The minute I stopped arguing,
I could begin to see and feel.
Right there, Step Two gently and very gradually
began to infiltrate my life.
I can't say upon what occasion,
or upon what day I came to believe
in a Power greater than myself,
but I certainly have that belief now.
To acquire it, I had only to stop fighting
and practice the rest of AA's program
as enthusiastically as I could.' "
1952AAWS, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 27
Thought to Consider . . .
Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?
*~*~*AACRONYMS*~*~*
A A = Altered Attitudes
*~*~*~*~*^Just For Today!^*~*~*~*~*
My Solution
From: "AA Taught Him to Handle Sobriety"
"Bewilderment, fear, and resentment moved into my life. And yet my ability to lie outwardly and to kid myself inwardly
grew with every drink I took. Indeed, I had to drink now to live, to cope with the demands of everyday existence. When I
encountered disappointments or frustrations - as I did more and more frequently - my solution was to drink. I had
always been oversensitive to criticism and was acutely so now. When I was criticized or reprimanded, the bottle was
my refuge and comfort."
2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 555
*~*~*~*~*^ Grapevine Quote ^*~*~*~*~*
"I saw that fear was a character defect, so I modified my Seventh Step Prayer. After 'remove every single defect of
character,' I added, 'and every unreasonable fear.'"
Brea, California, July 2010
"Unreasonable Fears,"
No Matter What: Dealing with Adversity in Sobriety
*~*~*~*~*^ Big Book & Twelve N' Twelve Quotes of the Day ^*~*~*~*~*
"Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly
act once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan
every day, if need be."
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 97~
"We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by
which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and
seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our
race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom
we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as
soon as we are willing and honest enough to try."
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 28~
“Acceptance is the key to my relationship with God today. I never just sit and do nothing while waiting for Him to tell me
what to do. Rather, I do whatever is in front of me to be done, and I leave the results up to Him; however it turns out,
that’s God’s will for me.”
-Alcoholics Anonymous p. 452 (3rd Edition)
“These conclusions did not require action; they required only acceptance.”
-Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions p. 34
Misc. AA Literature - Quote
Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his family. You should continue to be friendly to them, explaining A.A.s concept of alcoholism and its treatment. If they accept this and also apply our principles to their problems, there is a much better chance that the head of the family will recover. And even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable.
Unless a new members family readily expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles, we think he ought not to urge them. They will change in time. His better behavior will usually convince them far more than his words.
*Today, the initiation of the A.A. way of life in the home is the central purpose of the Al-Anon Family Groups, of which there are (as of 1980) about 16,000 throughout the world. These are composed of wives, husbands, and relatives of alcoholics. In restoring families to the good life, Al-Anons success has been enormous.
Prayer for the Day: "Higher Power, help me live in accordance with spiritual principles. Only then can I approve of myself."
Ask and you shall receive,
Seek and ye shall find,
Knock and it shall be opened unto you.
Matthew 7:7
Courage to change the things I can;
and Wisdom to know the difference.
Thy will, not mine, be done.
July 9
Daily Reflections
I AM AN INSTRUMENT
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
12 & 12, p.70
The subject of humility is a difficult one. Humility is not thinking
less of myself than I ought to; it is acknowledging that I do certain
things well, it is accepting a compliment graciously. God can only do
for me what He can do through me. Humility is the result of knowing
that God is the doer, not me. In the light of awareness, how can I take
pride in my accomplishments? I am an instrument and any work I
seem to be doing is being done by God through me. I ask God on a
daily basis to remove my shortcomings, in order that I may more freely
go about my A.A. business of "love and service."
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Disillusionment and spiritual confusion mark our age. Many of us
have cast aside old ideas without acquiring new ones. Many men
and women are creeping through life on their hands and knees,
merely because they refuse to rely on any power but themselves.
Many of them feel that they are being brave and independent, but
actually they are only courting disaster. Anxiety and the inferiority
complex have become the greatest of all modern plagues. In A.A.
we have the answer to these ills. Have I ceased to rely on myself
only?
Meditation For The Day
Disillusionment and doubt spoil life. The doubting ones are the
disillusioned ones. When you are in doubt, you are on the fence.
You are not going anywhere. Doubt poisons all action. "Well. I
don't know"--so you don't know anything. You should meet life
with a "Yes," an affirmative attitude. There is good in the world
and we can follow that good. There is power available to help us to
do the right thing; therefore we will accept that power. There are
miracles of change in people's lives; therefore we will accept
those miracles as evidence of God's power.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I will not be paralyzed by doubt. I pray that I may go along
on the venture of faith.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
The A.A. Way in the Home*, p. 190
Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his
family. You should continue to be friendly to them, explaining A.A.'s concept of
alcoholism and its treatment. If they accept this and also apply our principles to their
problems, there is a much better chance that the head of the family will recover. And
even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable.
********************************
Unless a new member's family readily expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles,
we think he ought not to urge them. They will change in time. His behavior will usually
convince them far more than his words.
Alcoholics Anonymous
1. p. 97
2. p. 83
*Today, the initiation of the A.A. way of life in the home is the central purpose of the Al-Anon
Family Groups of which there are (as of 1984) over 22,000 throughout the world. These are
composed of wives, husbands, and relatives of alcoholics. In restoring families to the good life,
Alan's success has been enormous.
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
What is the real cause?
Motivations.
Bringing her alcoholic husband home from a treatment center, a woman was dismayed when an argument ensued and he left the car in a rage. She blamed herself and their argument when he finally arrived home, DRUNK.
Seasoned veterans of alcoholic games will quickly understand that the argument had no part in “causing” the alcoholic to drink. Instead, the argument was something he started as a means of getting away from his wife. He still wanted and needed to drink.
In dealing with our compulsive illnesses, we must separate our excuses from what’s really going on. Arguments do not cause alcoholics to drink, but they can be used as convenient devices for getting our way.
I must take responsibility for my own behavior. If I have chosen sobriety, no person and no event can cause me to drink.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
First say to yourself what you would be: and then do what you have to do. - Eptctetus
We often tell ourselves we want to be more peaceful, more in touch with our Higher Power. In other words, we want to become more spiritual. Acting as spiritual people is hard. Tho often, we choose the easy way. We make a nasty comment even if we know it'll only make things worse.
We say we have a program for living. Are we living our program? We'll find the answer in our behavior. Sober people act in sober ways. We attend meetings regularly. We study spiritual ideas. We work to bring joy to our lives and the lives of others. Just as we know a good friend by the way he or she behaves, we know a sober person by the way he or she behaves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be a person whose words and actions match up.
Today's Action: Today I'll take an inventory of my actions to see if they are those of a sober person.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
BILL'S STORY
I had always believed in a power greater than myself. I had often pondered these things. I was not an atheist. Few people really are, for that means blind faith in the strange proposition that this universe originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. My intellectual heroes, the chemists, the astronomers, even the evolutionists, suggested vast laws and forces at work. Despite contrary indications, I had little doubt that a mighty purpose and rhythm underlay all. How could there be so much of precise and immutable law, and no intelligence? I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. But that was as far as I had gone.
p. 10
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
FREEDOM FROM BONDAGE - Young when she joined, this A.A. believes her serious drinking was the result of even deeper defects. She here tells how she was free.
The last three years of my drinking, I drank on my job. The amount of willpower exercised to control my drinking during working hours, diverted into a constructive channel, would have made me president, and the thing that made the willpower possible was the knowledge that as soon as my day was finished, I could drink myself into oblivion. Inside, though, I was scared to death, for I knew that the time was coming (and it couldn't be too remote) when I would be unable to hold that job. Maybe I wouldn't be able to hold any job, or maybe (and this was my greatest fear) I wouldn't care whether I had a job or not. I knew it didn't make any difference where I started, the inevitable end would be skid row. The only reality I was able to face had been forced upon me by its very repetition--I had to drink; and I didn't know there was anything in the world that could be done about it.
pp. 547-548
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Six - "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
THE moment we saw that we had an answer for alcoholism, it was reasonable (or so it seemed at the time) for us to feel that we might have the answer to a lot of other things. The A.A. groups, many thought, could go into business, might finance any enterprise whatever in the total field of alcoholism. In fact, we felt duty-bound to throw the whole weight of the A.A. name behind any meritorious cause.
p. 155
************************************************** *********
During the time of the darkest night, act as if the morning has already
come.
--The Talmud
The spiritual journey involves going beyond hope and fear, stepping
into unknown territory, continually moving forward. The most
important aspect of being on the spiritual path may be just to keep
moving.
--Pema Chodron
God is my life, I express health, God is my supply, I express
abundance, God is trust, I express faith.
--SweetyZee
No one gives me worry, nothing causes me fear, I release them, and
trust Gods outcomes.
--SweetyZee
I am steadfast in my loyalty to God and truth.
--SweetyZee
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PESSIMISM
"There is no sadder sight than a
young pessimist."
--Mark Twain
I meet so many young people who have "aged" because of their
drug addiction. They have lost that "spark" of youth that is both
creative and hopeful. They reveal in their eyes a "powerlessness"
that keeps them prisoners of lethargy. They don't want to do
anything. They mumble rather than speak. They walk with no
purpose: young zombies! Addiction breeds pessimism.
Recovery is realizing that life need not be like this. True joy and
happiness comes with the experience of self, rather than the
confused experiences of chemicals. Reality is facing the pain and
problems in order to rediscover the dynamic spirituality of a
drug-free life. The "yes" to life begins with the "no" to drugs.
Happiness and confidence are discovered in the "yes" to life.
Let me see beyond the gloom to the promised sunrise of tomorrow.
************************************************** *********
"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:13
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and
effective."
James 5:16
"Peter replied, "Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the
name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will
receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."
Acts 2:38
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our
sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I John 1:9
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
We often don't realize how heavy the weight of worry is and how much energy it requires until we are able to let go of it. Lord, I place my trust in You to clear my thinking, help me resolve my concerns and bring me to a place of peace.
Keep yourself young in spirit always by thinking new thoughts and getting rid of old habits. Lord, may my spirit never become frail and my abilities never become barren.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
We Do Recover!
"....the time has come when that tired old lie, 'Once an addict, always an addict,' will no longer be tolerated by either society or the addict himself. We do recover."
Basic Text, p.86
From time to time, we hear speakers share that they don't really understand spiritual principles yet. They tell us that if we knew what went on in their minds, we'd be amazed at how insane they still are. They tell us that the longer they're clean, the less they know about anything. In the next breath, these same speakers tell us about the profound changes recovery has made in their lives. They have moved from complete despair to unfailing hope, from uncontrollable drug use to total abstinence, from chronic unmanageability to responsibility through working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous. Which story is true? Do we or don't we recover?
We may think we demonstrate humility or gratitude by underplaying the change that recovery has brought to our lives. True, we do injustice to the program when we take credit for this miracle ourselves. But we do an equal injustice-to ourselves and to those we share with-when we don't acknowledge this miracle's magnitude.
We do recover. If we have trouble seeing the miracle of recovery, we'd better look again. Recovery is alive and at work in Narcotics Anonymous-in our old-timers, in the newcomers flooding our meetings, and most of all in ourselves. All we have to do is open our eyes.
Just for today: I will acknowledge the miracle of my recovery and be grateful that I've found it.
pg. 199
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. --Dorothy Canfield Fisher
A strong, healthy tree is one which is free to grow straight and tall. A weak tree often must lean against another for support. It is not that different with people. We are not healthy and strong when we must always lean on another to support us.
This doesn't mean it isn't healthy to accept help. But the best help we can get or give is that which enables us to do things without it. Sometimes we think we lose a relationship when others don't need our help, or when we don't need theirs all the time. The reverse is true. Only when we are each strong enough to stand on our own can we really share the kind of help, which allows both, helped and helper to be independent.
Have I been giving the right kind of help?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. --Herbert Spencer
We sometimes wish we could protect friends or loved ones from the consequences of their actions. We'd like to pick up the pieces after they've made a mess of their lives. Or we fail to look at the dark side of someone's motives because we want only the best. Perhaps it is our controlling willfulness that tries to make things into what we want, rather than accepts things as they really are.
In our masculine recovery, a deeper love allows us to have a respectful distance from others. When we truly care about someone, we don't snatch him or her out of his or her learning experience. When we allow our loved ones and friends to confront the natural consequences of their own actions, they learn and grow just as we do. We can be with a friend, but we are no one's Higher Power.
Today, I will be respectful of others by letting them walk their path while I walk mine.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Of course, fortune has its part in human affairs, but conduct is really much more important. --Jeanne Detourbey
It's not infrequent that we are faced with a dilemma; what is the best action to take in a certain situation? We can be guided, rightly, in every situation if we but turn inward and let our conscience direct our behavior. We have often heard it said at meetings that when we long for a message from God we will hear it, either through our conscience or in the words of our friends. Thus we can never really be in doubt; our conduct can always be above reproach if we but listen.
Right behavior leads to fortunate opportunities for those who look for them. Behavior that we're proud of seems to attract blessings in our lives. One's good fortune is really God-given and in proportion to one's willingness to act well toward others in all situations.
Simply, what goes around comes around. Our behavior comes back to us, manyfold. In our encounters with others today, we'll have numerous occasions to decide about the best behavior for the particular circumstance. We must not forget that our behavior elicits the responses we receive.
I will invite blessings today. I will also shower blessings on my friends.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Overspending and Underspending
I used to beat my husband to death with my credit card. It makes me feel like I had some control, some way to get even with him. --Anonymous
I spent ten years buying everything for myself at garage sales. I didn't even buy myself a new pair of shoes. The entire time I was depriving myself, my husband was gambling, speculating on risky business deals, and doing whatever he wanted with money. I learned that when I made a decision that I deserved to have the things I wanted, and made a decision to buy something I wanted, there was enough money to do it. It wasn't about being frugal; it was about depriving myself, and being a martyr. --Anonymous
Compulsive buying or overspending may give us a temporary feeling of power or satisfaction, but like other out of control behaviors, it has predictable negative consequences.
Under spending can leave us feeling victimized too.
There is a difference between responsible spending and martyred deprivation. There is a difference between treating ourselves well financially and overspending. We can learn to discern that difference. We can develop responsible spending habits that reflect high self esteem and love for ourselves.
Today, I will strive for balance in my spending habits. If I am overspending, I will stop and deal with what's going on inside me. If I am under spending or depriving myself, I will ask myself if that's necessary and what I want.
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong. --Ruth Fishel
**************************************************
Journey To The Heart
Learn to Focus Your Energy
“I’ve come to this lodge for one reason,” the woman at Breitenbush Retreat in Willamette Forest said. “I brought my fiddle, and I’m not leaving until I can play a bluegrass tune. If I want to get out of here, I’d better learn to play.
There is a time to be open, almost unfocused, as we take in what the world, the universe, is showing us. There is a time to get out of our heads and quietly take the journey our hearts lead us into– following with the openness and wonder of a child.
But there also comes a time to aim our attention and focus our energy on what we want to accomplish. Instead of floundering with scattered thoughts and possibilities, we choose one, then act on it. We stay in step with the natural rhythm, but we’re pulling our scattered attention together and focusing it as part of that rhythm.
To do that, we may have to work through or push away inner distractions. Moving through our inner obstacles enables us to accomplish our goal– whether that’s a task, a particular piece of work, or learning to play the fiddle.
Is there something you want to do? Is your heart urging you to learn something, accomplish something, go somewhere, do something? Make it a goal. Focus your energy. Learn to stay focused until you reach that goal.
Put yourself in the cabin and don’t let yourself out until it’s done.
**************************************************
More Language Of Letting Go
Stop being a sponge
You don’t have to be an emotional sponge, picking up every feeling around you. Learn to distinguish whether what you’re feeling belongs to you or to somebody else.
Linda has a grown son. Whenever her son is going through a difficult time, Linda takes her son’s emotions on, as if those feelings belonged to her. She’ll talk to her son on the phone for a while. He’ll express himself intensely and powerfully about how he really feels about everything in his life. After all, Linda’s his mom. It’s safe to tell her how he really feels, even if he can’t tell anyone else. Linda may feel fine when she begins talking to her son. But by the end of the conversation, Linda doesn’t feel that good anymore. She may feel angry, upset, or worried– or whatever her son was feeling before he talked to her.
Sometimes we soak up other people’s feelings because we forget to protect ourselves. Often, we do this because of the depth of feeling we have for this person. The remedy for this is the same as it is when we’re dealing with our own emotional stuff. We recognize what we’re feeling. We give that feeling its due. Then we let it go. We squeeze out the sponge.
Sometimes, it just takes the act of recognizing that we’ve taken on another person’s emotions to clear those emotions out. If we strive for awareness, we’ll begin to recognize when the feelings we’re feeling aren’t our own.
Children are often open and unprotected. If we’re going through a lot of feelings around them, they may absorb our emotions,too. It’s important to share our feelings with others and let people talk about their feelings to us. But we need to pay attention. If we’ve picked up someone else’s emotions, we need to let those feelings go.
God, help me know that part of being close to people and loving them means I sometimes take on their feelings. Show me how to protect myself so I can keep my heart open to the people I love without taking on their feelings.
Activity: As children, we may have absorbed emotions from our parents. These emotions can linger with us long into adulthood, shaping our beliefs and our general attitude toward life. These emotions can be tricky. We think they’re our own, but they’re not. They belong to someone else. Ask your Higher Power to show you whether you’ve absorbed any emotions from your parents or other people in your life. Then stay open to the responses you get to this prayer. If any emotions or memories begin popping into your consciousness, go to your journal and write about them. Just document the scene or memory that comes to mind. Then release the emotions. Set them free and let them go. Carrying around someone else’s feelings doesn’t help the other person and it doesn’t help us. You deserve to be free and clear.
**************************************************
Food for Thought
Tension or Hunger?
How often have we eaten because of tension, rather than hunger? Accepting our need for three measured meals a day with nothing in between establishes a sensible pattern, which satisfies our need for nourishment. When we are tense, we can find ways of relaxing which do not harm our body by making it fat.
Learning to relax the stomach muscles helps get rid of tension hunger. Often when we have eaten too fast because of tension, our stomach continues to send hunger signals after the meal. There has not been enough time for the digestive process to register satisfaction. We can consciously relax the muscles so that the feeling of emptiness will go away.
The best cure for tension is a growing faith in our Higher Power. If we are willing to trust Him in the little things of each day, as well as the big events of our life, we will be able to relax and cultivate serenity.
Dissolve my tension and feed my hunger, I pray.
**************************************************
Cause for Celebration
Honoring Everyday Life by Madisyn Taylor
Use the good china everyday as today is all that matters.
We all know someone who keeps plastic covers on his or her couch in order to protect it. The irony is that many of these people may live their lives without ever having actually made contact with their own furniture! This is a poignant and somewhat humorous example of the human tendency to try to save things for special occasions, as if everyday life weren’t special enough to warrant the use of nice things. Many of us have had the experience of never wearing a particular piece of clothing in order to keep it nice, only to have it go out of style in the meanwhile.
It’s interesting to think of what it would mean to us if we let ourselves wear our nicest clothes and eat off the good china on a daily basis. We might be sending ourselves the message that every day we are alive is a special day and a cause for celebration, and that we are worth it. There is something uplifting about treating ourselves to the finest of what we have. It is as if we rise to the occasion when we wear our best clothes and set the table beautifully, as if for a very special guest. We are more mindful of where we place things, what we are eating, and who is with us. Using the good china, eating in the dining room, and taking the plastic off the sofa might be an invitation to be more conscious of the beauty and grace inherent in our everyday lives.
If there are things you’ve stashed away for a special occasion—a bottle of special wine, a gorgeous pair of shoes, an antique lace tablecloth—consider taking them out of their hiding places and putting them to use tonight, just because you are alive now to enjoy them, and that’s a great cause for a celebration. Published with permission from Daily OM
**************************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we make only superficial changes in ourselves, and give only lip service to The Program, our progress is slow and the likelihood of relapse great. Our regeneration must take the form of a true spiritual rebirth. It must go very deep, within each character flaw replaced by a new and positive quality. Am I being completely honest with myself in uncovering the faults which hamper my spiritual growth? Am I beginning to replace them with positive qualities?
Today I Pray
May God’s protective hand lead me out of the darkness of my deepest fear — that I could return to being what I do now want to be. Please, God, give me courage to make an honest appraisal of myself. Please help me cultivate my positive qualities and begin to be free of my fears.
Today I Will Remember
I must be reborn in the Spirit.
**************************************************
One More Day
Should I, after tea and cakes and ices, Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis?
– Thomas Stearns Eliot
Some people call it “dancing around the issue.” After all, if there is a problem to face, we may become embarrassed when it’s time to talk about it. We try so hard to balance the emotional framework of our lives that we hardly want to be the one to bring up what seems to be a taboo topic. What we think, we don’t always state; what we intend, we don’t state clearly; and what we need, we rarely ask for. Our half-truths and mixed messages don’t result in honest communication.
Drug use? Manipulative behavior? Eating disorder? Financial problems? The only way to begin to face a problem is to admit that there is one, to talk about it, and to decide together what steps can be taken to help.
Today, I will face a problem honestly.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
CONTROL
“I offer you this prayer for all the difficult relationships in our lives:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change,
The courage to change the person I can,
And the wisdom to know that person is me.”
Rev. Mary Manin Morrissey
My disease tells me that my life would be so much better if people would only do what I tell them to do. If they would listen to me, I could solve all their problems, fix their lives, and everybody would be happy. Why can't they see that our relationships would be better if they'd just do what I say, and not what I do? Don't they realize that I know more than they do about how to run their lives?
Well, luckily for the people in my life, this disease lies. I DON'T know what's best for them. Because I have a disease of compulsion, I don't even know what's best for me. If I had known what was best for me, my life would not have been in shambles like it was before I found the Twelve Steps of recovery.
I had to come to the realization that my life had become unmanageable. Only then could I find a Higher Power to restore sanity to the crazy drama that had become my life ~ and to grant me the serenity which accompanies sanity. Now I realize the only person I can control is myself. I can't make other people change into what I want them to be, nor can I make them do what I think is best for them. Since I've begun letting my Higher Power restore me to sanity, I no longer want to be a control freak. I can't even fathom trying to run another person's life. I have enough on my hands just living my own life; I don't have the strength, knowledge or wisdom to live someone else's. I will always be grateful to my Higher Power for helping me to realize that.
One day at a time...
I will live my own life and allow others to live theirs.
~ Jeff
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Speaking at a dinner given by John D. Rockefeller Jr. to introduce Alcoholics Anonymous to some of his friends, Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick remarked:
'I think that psychologically speaking there is a point of advantage in the approach that is being made in this movement that cannot be duplicated. I suspect that if it is wisely handled - and it seems to be in wise and prudent hands - there are doors of opportunity ahead of this project that may surpass our capacities to imagine.' - Pg. 572 - 4th. Edition - Appendix V - The Religious View On A.A.
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whether serious and conservative or eager and flighty, newcomers often feel no necessity for embracing recovery. REMEMBER, millions have gone before you. You don't have to embrace the 12 steps but embrace something that works for recovery.
I embrace a program of recovery, not my self will, but a program I trust with clean and people that I can see!
Spiritual Transformation
Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person - respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has equal access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it.
I seek truth within myself.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
A main theme in most spiritual traditions states that the best way to get what you want is to provide it for another. If you want serenity, make it peaceful and serene for another. Do you want a feeling of safety? Provide a safe place for another. Do you want to understand what has happened? Help another to understand.
I teach best what I most need to learn.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The slogans work much better when you decorate your life with them rather than decorating the walls with them.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am learning to stop judging and comparing so that I can be with what is. I am learning to accept what is without the struggle of trying to decide whether it is right or wrong.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm getting younger in AA. When I came in I was an old man of thirty, I couldn't walk across the alley. Now at seventy I'm running marathons. - Waggy Bill.
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AA Thought for the Day
July 9
Acceptance
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.
When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation
-- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity
until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation
as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 417
Thought to Ponder . . .
My serenity is directly proportional to my level of acceptance.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change.
~*~A.A. Thoughts For The Day~*~
Attitude
" 'Then I woke up.
I had to admit that AA showed results, prodigious results.
I saw that my attitude regarding these
had been anything but scientific.
It wasn't AA that had the closed mind, it was me.
The minute I stopped arguing,
I could begin to see and feel.
Right there, Step Two gently and very gradually
began to infiltrate my life.
I can't say upon what occasion,
or upon what day I came to believe
in a Power greater than myself,
but I certainly have that belief now.
To acquire it, I had only to stop fighting
and practice the rest of AA's program
as enthusiastically as I could.' "
1952AAWS, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 27
Thought to Consider . . .
Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?
*~*~*AACRONYMS*~*~*
A A = Altered Attitudes
*~*~*~*~*^Just For Today!^*~*~*~*~*
My Solution
From: "AA Taught Him to Handle Sobriety"
"Bewilderment, fear, and resentment moved into my life. And yet my ability to lie outwardly and to kid myself inwardly
grew with every drink I took. Indeed, I had to drink now to live, to cope with the demands of everyday existence. When I
encountered disappointments or frustrations - as I did more and more frequently - my solution was to drink. I had
always been oversensitive to criticism and was acutely so now. When I was criticized or reprimanded, the bottle was
my refuge and comfort."
2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 555
*~*~*~*~*^ Grapevine Quote ^*~*~*~*~*
"I saw that fear was a character defect, so I modified my Seventh Step Prayer. After 'remove every single defect of
character,' I added, 'and every unreasonable fear.'"
Brea, California, July 2010
"Unreasonable Fears,"
No Matter What: Dealing with Adversity in Sobriety
*~*~*~*~*^ Big Book & Twelve N' Twelve Quotes of the Day ^*~*~*~*~*
"Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly
act once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan
every day, if need be."
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Working With Others, pg. 97~
"We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by
which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and
seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our
race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom
we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as
soon as we are willing and honest enough to try."
~Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, There Is A Solution, pg. 28~
“Acceptance is the key to my relationship with God today. I never just sit and do nothing while waiting for Him to tell me
what to do. Rather, I do whatever is in front of me to be done, and I leave the results up to Him; however it turns out,
that’s God’s will for me.”
-Alcoholics Anonymous p. 452 (3rd Edition)
“These conclusions did not require action; they required only acceptance.”
-Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions p. 34
Misc. AA Literature - Quote
Though an alcoholic does not respond, there is no reason why you should neglect his family. You should continue to be friendly to them, explaining A.A.s concept of alcoholism and its treatment. If they accept this and also apply our principles to their problems, there is a much better chance that the head of the family will recover. And even though he continues to drink, the family will find life more bearable.
Unless a new members family readily expresses a desire to live upon spiritual principles, we think he ought not to urge them. They will change in time. His better behavior will usually convince them far more than his words.
*Today, the initiation of the A.A. way of life in the home is the central purpose of the Al-Anon Family Groups, of which there are (as of 1980) about 16,000 throughout the world. These are composed of wives, husbands, and relatives of alcoholics. In restoring families to the good life, Al-Anons success has been enormous.
Prayer for the Day: "Higher Power, help me live in accordance with spiritual principles. Only then can I approve of myself."
Ask and you shall receive,
Seek and ye shall find,
Knock and it shall be opened unto you.
Matthew 7:7