Today's Gift for Families - March 2014

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 1, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty: not knowing what comes next.

—Ursula LeGuin

The world around us changes constantly. Trees turn from green to beautiful shades of yellow, orange, and brown in the fall. Yet, even if we watched the trees carefully, every minute of the day, we could not actually see the colors change. Change requires time, preparation, and patience.

To make the changes we want, we need to let go of unhealthy but comfortable patterns that we're stuck in, the way the trees let their colors change and finally let go of their leaves altogether. We can't have total change right now, no matter how much we want it. It's important to accept both who we are now and who we are becoming. Just as the tree trusts without question that its leaves will grow and lets go of them when the time comes, we can believe in our own power to grow and let go of our accomplishments when the time is right.

When we do, we can be assured that our lives will blossom again, like trees in the spring coming to life after a cold winter.

Do I have any new blossoms today?

Mine haven't been in bloom for a few day. :(

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 2, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I was angry with my friend: I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe: I told it not, my wrath did grow.

—William Blake

We have a right to claim our own feelings. Sometimes we get angry, but hold it inside because we think it's wrong to feel it. If anger builds inside us, it expands like a balloon ready to burst. If not released, it can make us depressed, or even physically ill. When we give ourselves permission to feel anger, we are better able to get rid of it in a healthy way. Our inner voice can tell us how to let go of our anger. And once we've released it, we can easily get in touch with the feelings that caused it.

When we recognize our anger for what it is--one feeling among many others that makes us unique--it loses its significance, and we can prevent it from consuming us. Indira Ghandi said, "You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist." When we let go of our anger we can honestly embrace each other with open arms.

Am I carrying around anger which could be released today?

Have found over the years, that anger often happens when I don't get my own way. It also means that I allow some person, place or thing, to rule my life. I give up my own power and allow them to rent space in my head without a down payment.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 3, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.

—Thomas Jefferson

Some of the necessary things we do are tiring and annoying. Many of these things we must do regardless of how we feel about them. Doing dishes day after day can be a tiresome job, but no matter how much we hate it, it must be done sooner or later. We might discover, if we look hard enough, how chores like this can actually be enjoyable, if we do them right. Perhaps dish washing is a time for listening to music and singing along, or an opportunity for conversation between family members as we help one another.

Our willingness to look for the hidden treasure and opportunities in tasks we might otherwise consider dreary will never fail to reward us.

What opportunity can I see in my next chore?

Love the quote. If I don't have the willingness to do, I need to pray for the willingness to be willing. When we stay in the moment, in today, a chore doesn't become a chore but an act of love and acceptance.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I celebrate myself, and sing myself, and what I assume, you shall assume.

—Walt Whitman

Some of us may think Walt Whitman must have been terribly conceited to have written words like that. But he wasn't. He knew himself well, and accepted himself, even his darker side. He could laugh at himself and celebrate his humanness.

And because he loved and accepted himself just as he was, others could do the same. That's difficult to understand sometimes, but it's true: no one else is going to love and accept us until we come to love and accept ourselves.

We teach others how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves, so perhaps it makes sense to apply a variation of the Golden Rule: "Do unto ourselves as we would have others do unto us."

Can I allow my kindness to myself overflow to another person today?

Do onto others as you would have them do onto you. What goes around comes around, what you give out, you get back.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The farmer may only be planting a seed, but if he opens his eyes he is feeding the whole world.

—Omaha Bee

A traveler journeying through a small village came upon some workers building an impressive structure. "What are you doing?" he asked. The first worker, a young, impatient man, replied in disgust, "I am making three dollars an hour and I'm getting very tired!" The visitor asked another man the same question. "I'm mixing concrete, as you can plainly see," came the sarcastic reply. Finally, a woman working nearby left her wheelbarrow full of bricks and approached the stranger. "We are building a hospital," she said with pride. "Now we will be able to care for all the region's people. Babies will be born here. Lives will be saved."

The stranger looked at the woman with admiration and spoke directly to her. "I know, for this is my hospital. Only you hold the vision of what it is you are creating." The wealthy benefactor then put the woman in charge of construction so his hospital would be built by one who truly understood.

Will I see the importance of even the small things I do today?

It is the small things that up into a big awakening, my God is doing for me what I can't do for myself.

I don't expect Him to do my laundry, but I know I can go to Him and ask for the incentive, willingness, and courage to get some done even if I can't do it all. I can still find myself in that all or nothing at all stage, which is me trying to play God with my life. What will be will be. If I don't think of what I should do, and recognize what I did do, then life is so much better. Stress is such a big trigger for all substance abuse.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 6, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

This Mouse must give up one of the Mouse ways of seeing things in order that he may grow.

—Hyemeyohsts Storm

There is an American Indian tale of a mouse who heard a roaring in his ears and set out to discover what it was. He encountered many animals who helped him on his way. Finally, the mouse had a chance to offer help to another. He gave away his eyes to help two other animals.

Without his sight, defenseless, he waited for the end. Soon he heard the sound eagles make when they dive for their prey. The next thing the mouse knew, he was flying. He could see all the splendor around him. Then he heard a voice say, "You have a new name. You are Eagle."

Like the mouse, we also feel something inside us we'd like to explore. That secret, like all others, has its answer hidden deep within us, yet right under our very nose. Often, we merely have to give up our eyes and see in a different way. When we do this, we are rewarded with a new kind of vision, one that lets us discover our true potential.

How can I look at things differently today?

Take off your rose coloured glasses, widen your vision, pray and ask for my God's Will for me in today. Do a 10th Step!

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 7, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

He who distributes the milk of human kindness cannot help but spill a little on himself.

—James Barrie

We like ourselves best when we like those around us. When we smile at them, they smile back; when we ask them, they tell us about themselves. When we scowl at people, they'll frown back; when we ignore them, they'll walk away.

It's true that we get back what we put into things, whether it's work, play, love, or gardening. We decide by the extent of our commitment how valuable or enjoyable or depressing an experience can be for us.

Our actions toward others come right back to us. When we smile at people, they smile back, and we feel good. Sometimes feeling good about ourselves depends on feeling good about others. When we send out that smile of ours, those who get it pass it on, and we have added power to the happiness of the world.

What can I do to show my fondness for others today?

For me, is to not sit in isolation. There have been times in my life where I shut the phone off, or just wouldn't answer it or the door. Depression eats the soul. If I reach out to others, I cleans my soul and allows the light to come in.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 8, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Laughter by definition is healthy.

—Doris Lessing

A hearty laugh can warm a cold room and make our spirits soar. But many of us are afraid to laugh, especially when we make mistakes. We think we're supposed to be perfect, and we don't allow ourselves to make mistakes. However, we're not a mold punched out by a machine. We're human beings, with all our wonderful flaws. It is those flaws that make our lives interesting and surprising. Who knows when we might accidentally bump into a chair or catch our sweater on a doorknob? We needn't feel self-conscious, it happens to many of us.

The ability to laugh at ourselves is a gift from God. All we need to do is grab it and use it. Then we will see how healthy and powerful laughter can be.

Can I find the humor in my mistakes today?

A gift my service sponsor claimed to have taught me, when I was 5 years sober. I really didn't like her kind of humour and it was because of that I let her go as my sponsor. I moved into a new place and she asked me if I had a mat beside my bed to muffle the sound of all the men jumping in and out of my bed. I was really hurt, I had a lot of friends, male and female, but that didn't mean I took them to my bed for favours. Jealousy can be a deadly things. Ironically, several years later, she had alienated everyone and she called me and I sponsored her until she past away.

What some people see as funny, doesn't always have the same reaction in others. When you put someone else down to make yourself feel better, doesn't work. It harms you and them.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 9, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

There is no such thing as a long piece of work, except one that you dare not start.
—Charles Baudelaire

A big assignment can be scary to face. We may start to think that how we do on the assignment will determine if we're good or bad people. The more we think about it, the harder that task seems. The key to overcoming our negative feelings is to say to ourselves that we are capable of finishing our projects. We must say it over and over until we start believing it's true. Then we can attack the assignment with vitality and positive energy we didn't know we had.

We can make up our minds to do our best and accept that from ourselves. We say Edison was a genius, but our light bulbs still burn out regularly. Even Einstein was wrong once in a while, and he knew it, but that didn't stop him from trying.

When we feel afraid to start something because it seems too big a job, let's stop and think what the first step would be, and do each small step in its own time.

What can I start that I've been putting off?

Don't tell me that my God doesn't have a sense of humour. Didn't even have to think about this, I need to do laundry. In fact, it seems like I always need to do laundry, ironically, I don't really mind doing it. It is just an effort to go from the 19th floor to the 3rd floor. It has been cold, but don't trust the other tenants to not steal my clothes in the dryer. My problem is that I have too many clothes. I have a few things that I don't want to let go of, a few t-shirts that are almost paper thin. ;)

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSTpcz3bykePlzOO3zfwVFeQ3yDGJHXL WkHOazYy4BVr8_v5cqI

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 10, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The older you get the more you realize that kindness is synonymous with happiness.

--Lionel Barrymore

Once in a while, we forget about the kind things people have done for us. Do we remember the next-door neighbor who helped us get our kite out of a tree, or the brother who helped us finish a project for school? If we think about these kindnesses, we will remember how happy we were to receive them.

These people and others may need a kindness we can give. Our next-door neighbor may get sick and need us to go to the store, a brother or sister may need to borrow a radio, or the elderly person down the street may need the lawn mowed. Whenever we take the time to give a kindness, we will find that like the boomerang, it returns to us in the form of happiness.

Will I be alert to my chances to give kindness today?

All I have to remember is my manners and say please and thank you.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Being a healthy parent means being firm but nurturing, giving children a decent sense of the boundaries along with lots of unconditional love.

—Karen Shaud

In a healthy family, life goes along and everybody pitches in to do the housework. Some people wonder why housework is such a big deal. It is because people need to contribute to a group in order to feel they belong to it. Housework makes us part of the same group--our house, our family. We make our house comfortable so we can feel comfortable and safe in it. We show love for ourselves by making our surroundings likeable. And when we do physical work, we can do our inner housekeeping, letting go of negative feelings that pile up during the day.

On days when life feels out of control, we feel good when we do one simple job: clean the messy desk, wash dirty dishes, shovel the snowy walk. In this way we regain control of our feelings as well as a perspective on those things within our control.

What simple work do I need to do to feel better today?

Help someone else and in doing so, I help myself.

Whenever I see the word control, I remember what I was taught in Mary Ellis House where I went through treatment, "If you have to control it, it is already out of control." Just not my using and the substance I choose to pick up (people, places, and things), but the thinking that takes me to that place, where I am looking outside of myself for affirmation, validation, attention, love and acceptance, because I can't find it within myself.

For so many years, I lived my life through my son and/or the man in my life, I put my life on hold, waiting for their commands and I would let my life slide by, because I wasn't important and worthy.

I am an addict just as much as the alcoholic and drug addict in my life. They use me and I used them.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Gentleness is not a quality exclusive to women.

—Helen Reddy

Each of us has our soft side: maybe it's when we're petting a kitten, caring for a baby robin with an injured wing, or soothing a crying child who is afraid. Behaving in a gentle way toward others gives us warm feelings inside. It also encourages others to treat us gently, too.

We don't always feel like being gentle. If we're sad or worried about school or a friend, we might not even notice the people around us who need our gentleness. But when we remember gentleness, it lifts our spirits. Two people will always be happier when we're gentle--the person we've been gentle to and ourselves.

Who can I share my gentleness with today?


This reminds me of something most people try not to recognize within themselves. We do have a feminine and a masculine side and often we try to prove ourselves or erect walls to block our more sensitive side.

Gentleness is important, especially when dealing with ourselves. Don`t be so hard on yourself! Forgive yourself! Take time for yourself! Stop with the tongue lashing, and the push, push until we drop and crash and burn.

As I have shared before, my meditations cards once told me, `Your feminine side is languishing.` Love that word, but not a pretty picture comes to mind. Use to the survivor and allowing myself to be vulnerable was one of the hardest part of recovery.

Be gentle with yourself, you are worthwhile and deserving of love and care. Look to yourself and give to you what you do for others as the caretaker in you. Affirm yourself and validate who you are, and know it is okay to be you.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 13, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I never dreamed of so much happiness when I was the ugly duckling.

—Hans Christian Andersen

The ugly duckling was not really ugly at all, he was just different. The other ducks teased and pecked and even bit him until the ugly duckling flew away. He wandered around for a year, and was treated as an outcast everywhere. In the spring, he saw a group of swans on a lake, and wanted very much to join them. As he swam out toward them, he was astounded to notice his reflection in the water--he was a swan! The other swans welcomed him warmly, and found him to be beautiful.

Most of us go through times when we feel different from those around us. These are painful and lonely times, but it doesn't mean there is anything wrong with us. Like the ugly duckling, we will come into a time when we will be loved. All the pain and loneliness we have felt will help us fully appreciate the acceptance when we find it.

How can I treasure the ways I am different from others today?

Was told to look at what I had rather than what I didn't have. Look at where I had been and see how far I had come. We all go through, and for many years, I was the martyr, the victim, and the scapegoat, and the caretaker. It was always about others, never about me. In today, it is about my recovery, without it, I don't have me.

Each of us had our own trauma, and maybe the same issues, but my feelings are mine and theirs are theirs, and whether we react or act the same is neither here nor there, it is about bringing it all to light and allowing it to heal.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 14, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Each man with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.
—Mark Twain

What does it mean to be different? How does it feel? Is it okay to act or look or be different from everyone else at times? Sometimes, maybe even most of the time, it feels safer to blend into the crowd. We don't want to stick out like a sore thumb. But sometimes it's when we are different that we discover new things no one has ever thought of or done before.

We don't want to spend our whole lives doing only what others do. And there are times when we must take a stand if what others are doing is wrong. Perhaps it's good practice to try to do some little thing differently once in a while, to stand out from the crowd, just to get used to it. We might even like it. After all, if no one ever dares to be different, how would our world ever change for the better?

What little thing can I do to stand out from the crowd today?

Saw the quote, and what came to mind was the old saying, "What pulls your crank today?" I try not to go there in today.

Depends on my motive and intent, as to what attention I want to attract. I want people to see me and think I have something special in my life and ask me what it is. That means I am taking my program out of the recovery rooms and living it at home and in the community.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 15, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The difficulty in life is the choice.

—George Moore

How we choose to spend our time says much about what is important to us. If we have no goals, we may try to kill time. If we have too many goals, there may not be enough time in the day to do all we set out to do. We must make some choices based on our values. We may need to take more time for some things, and let go of others. For example, this year will we try to learn to play the guitar? Perhaps we have finally decided to drop out of that club which seems to have little purpose. Will we give more time to work, or less time? With each of these choices, we shape our lives. We can do it with the touch of an artist if we pay attention to the choices we are making.

What is truly important to me today?

First thing is my sobriety. My emotional sobriety and the tools the program gives me to find the soundness of mind to say no to drugs, yes to hugs.

Live my own life, and allow others to live theirs; instead of living my life through others and putting my life on hold waiting for someone else's convenience.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 16, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

'Tis God gives skill, but not without men's hands. He could not make Antonio Stradivarius violins without Antonio.

—George Eliot

When she was four years old, she climbed onto the piano stool. To her parents' astonishment, a simple prelude she'd heard on the radio flew across the keys from her fingers. That very week they found her a teacher, and the house was filled with the music of her developing talent.

While other girls played, made the honor roll, starred on the basketball team, and dated boyfriends, she sat inside at her beloved piano and practiced. At seventeen, when she made her debut, the critics said, "She's a natural. A genius!"

We know she was no natural, but through hard work, she made her piano playing part of her nature. When we put love into our labor, our own dreams grow into being.

Am I willing to make some sacrifices today to do the things I really want to do?

I was told that sacrifice meant "To make sacred." To me, if my God leads me to it, He will see me through it. No matter what I am doing, I know I need to make time for my God.

Sometimes it is about me, feeding my body, mind, and spirit, and other times, it is putting me aside and doing what my God wants me to do in today. Most cases, it is one and the same.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 17, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Love is always open arms.

--Leo Buscaglia

There is a story about a boy who left home and dishonored his father by spending a large amount of money on fast and reckless living. When the boy's money ran out, he was faced with the prospect of returning home to face his father, knowing the father had every reason to be disappointed in him. Filled with fear and shame he approached his home, his mind racing with words of apology. Before the boy could say a word, his father rushed to him with open arms and hugged his lost son in joy and love.

Have we done this? Have we found it in our hearts to approve whatever a loved one does, even if we would have wanted something different?

Love like this is the highest kind of love. It finds joy in others no matter what, because it recognizes the freedom of those we love, and doesn't chain them to our own wants. It is the same kind of love God has for us.

Are my arms open today?

Always open for a hug. In fact, when I meet someone, I ask them, "Do you do hugs?" Don't like to invade their space, and let them choose as to who they will let into their space.

Also have to remember that when I sit with my arms crossed, hands clenched, introverted instead of extroverted, and close myself off by barriers and walls of any kind, I block myself off from God as well as others.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/saint-patrick/0014.gif

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Tyger, Tyger, burning bright, In the forests of the night; What immortal hand or eye, Could frame thy fearful symmetry? Did He who made the Lamb make thee?
—William Blake

Is there a lamb and a tiger inside us? Is there any commandment, written on the sky or a stone tablet, denying us our perfect right to be both tiger and lamb? The tiger, beast made of fire and night, shows its teeth when it blazes with love; the lamb, orphan wrapped in soft blanket of cloud, weeps to receive that same love. So we give and take, are strong and weak, guilty and innocent, wrong and right. So we are balanced, even when we seem to be in conflict.

When we learn to accept all the things we can be, we will be able to love all the ways the world outside us can be.

What conflict is helping me grow today?

It strengthens my connection to my Higher Power. If like was same old, same old, I would get bored and go looking for something to stir up the pot. That is not a good thing for me and not a healthy choice for the most part. Old behaviours and habits did not do much for me in the past, so why should I want to repeat them in today?

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Where is the yesterday that worried us so?

—Joan Walsh Anglund

In the fairy tale The Last Dream of the Old Oak Tree, the oak tree felt sorry for the dayfly. The dayfly only lives for one day, and the tree was already 365 years old. But the dayfly was so enjoying his one-day that the tree's sympathy puzzled him. The dayfly said to the tree, "You may have thousands of my days, but I have thousands of moments to be pleased and happy in."

And so the dayfly continued to dance in the sun and smell the clover and honeysuckle. His day ended as happily as he spent it, and he settled down on a blade of grass.

If all of us could approach our day the way the dayfly does, as though this were our only day, we would spend less time worrying about yesterday and tomorrow.

How can I show my gratitude for the gift of this day?

Remember to say thank you. Pass it on to others, share!

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 20, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I want, by understanding myself, to understand others.

—Katherine Mansfield

Growing up to be the best people we can be is a lifelong process. As teenagers, we may have thought that twenty-one would be a magic year for us because then we would become adults. We'd be grown up and able to handle any problems that came along, if any did.

But the older we get, the more we realize that growing up is a process that never ends. We are always becoming the people we are capable of being. We're always learning new things about ourselves, and in that process, we're always coming to new understandings about other people and how we can get along with them.

How wonderful that life always offers us room to grow! It makes new discoveries possible all through our lives, and ensures us that we will always have something to offer.

What discovery have I made just today?

Haven't done much discovering in today, just grateful that I woke up to a new day. Today I discovered I didn't have a lot of intense pain, so hoping to get some posting done.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 21, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall; Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

—Mother Goose

Poor Humpty ended up such a scrambled egg. Maybe that's what comes from sitting too long in one place, choosing neither this way nor that, playing both sides against the middle. Maybe he played too much politics, got too much advice, had too much to think about. When the centipede was asked which leg he first moved when setting out on a stroll, he got those legs all tangled in his mind and couldn't walk at all. It is better to be simply moved by those around us, or by our Higher Power, with faith and love. When our thoughts fail, their hearts, hands, and eyes will show the way.

Do I sometimes decide my fate by refusing to decide?

Took a while in recovery to see that by refusing to make a decision, I was making a decision and saying no. Very few maybes to life, most times it is yes or no.

My father seldom said "Yes!" When we got a "Maybe" we took it to mean a "Yes," because most times all we heard was "No!"

It is the same as "Either God is or He isn't!

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 22, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Real men don't vacuum.

—Anna Genich

Once, not so long ago, there was a family who tried to divide up housework equally. The father signed up for vacuuming, but he never got around to doing it.

One morning he told everyone about his dream the night before. He was lined up in the dining room with an entire football team, and they all ran in a line through the house, pushing the clutter and dirt up against the walls and out of the way. They came to a finish at the picture window, where the father turned and raised his arms in victory. Then he saw his wife watching him, so he explained, "Heroes don't vacuum."

Perhaps each of us is a hero at one time or another. In that case, we might take turns at different chores, rewarding the day's hero with a day off from vacuuming or dishwashing. When we work together to get the chores done, we become a family of heroes, and can feel a healthy pride in our warm, loving, and clean home.

How can we share housework more equally?

This reminds me of a story that happened several years ago. A friend that I met at Mohawk College was going back to Hawaii, and she stayed with me for two weeks before she flew home. She had been raised in the area, so she came here, and went on the McMaster University and I baby sat her son.

When she came to my place (shared with my son when we first came to Hamilton in the mid 80s) and she told him, "It wouldn't hurt for you to help your mom and do dishes. He replied, "I am not BUILT to do dishes! She had a book in her hand and she almost through it at him.

Everything is much better when shared.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 23, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

It feels so good to cry. . .

—Susan Cygnet

Some of us were taught that it's bad to express our feelings directly - crying, wailing, jumping up and down for joy--that it's good manners to talk softly, slowly, and politely and to sit still.

But what happens to our feelings when we sit still? If they don't get expressed, they must be caught inside our bodies. Trapped feelings are like birds in a cage, or a rabbit in a trap--they try to get out any way they can. They peck on our heads and give us headaches. They scratch at our stomachs and make us hurt.

We must let them out. We must laugh and cry. Then our bodies will be happy, and our feelings will curl up in our laps like happy puppies.

Am I ignoring the physical symptoms of trapped feelings?

Didn't do tears in early recovery, so it took me a while to heal. This affirms my belief, that our emotional pain makes itself known physically.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 24, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The things we hate about ourselves aren't more real than things we like about ourselves.

—Ellen Goodman

It is so easy, and tempting, to get down on ourselves, to focus on an imperfect face, a dismal batting average, our fear of math, or our big feet. The trouble is, the more we feel sorry for ourselves, and the more we have to feel sorry about. And though it probably doesn't hurt to indulge in a little self-pity once in a while, how unfortunate--and limiting--it can be to let those attitudes define us.

The things we hate about ourselves are no more real than the things we like about ourselves. The trick is to dwell on the things we like instead of those we don't. Even on days when we are sure we are the least loveable creatures in the world, we can "act as if" we like ourselves. What a surprise at the end of the day, to find out that we actually do!

What can I like about myself today?

My brown eyes? Like that I am no longer caught up in the bondage of my addiction.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

My most irrational fear is that I've forgotten how to cook.

—Pam Sherman

Once there was a teacher who was having nightmares about doing a good job. In one dream, he couldn't find his classroom and he had to run from building to building. In another dream, he started teaching the lesson in the middle of the woods and didn't notice he was in the wrong place!

Then one Sunday morning, he read an article about a wonderful baker. She baked every day, started bakeries, and fixed food for her friends, yet when the reporter asked her about her fears, she said, "My most irrational fear is that I've forgotten how to cook."

Suddenly the man felt better. He realized someone else had the same kinds of fears. In a miraculous way, our fears become less powerful when we discover that we share them with other people.

What fear can I share with someone right now?

Like the quote about fearful of not being able to cook. Didn`t figure I could cook a turkey again, because it wasn`t safe to have a bottle around to cook with.

Had a few of those, thinking I couldn`t dance without a few drinks, smoked a cigarello without the wine tip to see if I could still smoke cigars. Cured myself of that habit quickly.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

There is a proper balance between not asking enough of oneself and asking or expecting too much.

—May Sarton

The boy's mother baked pies that morning before he was up. She left them on the back porch to cool, their warm aroma curling up through his bedroom window. His mouth was full of the smell when he woke.

Before she left for work, she said, "You may do anything you want today, anything at all. Except for one thing - don't step in those pies."

All day the boy could not get the pies out of his mind; his feet itched just thinking about them.

Don't step in those pies. He heard her voice inside his head. By late afternoon he could control it no longer. One, two, three, four, five, six--his foot fell squarely into the middle of each pie.

When we expect the worst from others, we often get just that. The same goes for our expectations of ourselves. And when we trust others, it too is returned.

Do I expect the best of others--and myself--today?

Expectations can lead to hurt, abandonment and rejection issues, and resentments. I had to learn to lower my expectations of myself and not look to others to fill my expectations, some people, especially those caught up in their own disease, are not able to meet them.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 27, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

We like someone because, we love someone although.

—Henri de Montherlant

Families are like scissors. They are joined in the middle but often spread wide apart, moving away from each other. When we're not feeling close to other family members - when it's hard even to like them - it seems as though we'll never come together again.

But pity the scrap of paper that comes between our scissor blades! The scissors works together again and slices the trouble clean. When trouble threatens our family, we can slice it through if we move together in love and acceptance.

No matter our small differences, we are part of the same living organism, in a way. The family we live in has been together for many generations, and we are just the most recent members. When we look at one another, we see the products of centuries of love.

When I feel distant from my family, can I locate where we are still joined together?

My thought is that I love my family, but I don't always like their words, their actions, and choices.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 28, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I have a feeling I should paint what I am supposed to paint. So I sit. And there my hand moves and I made a picture.

—Norval Morriseau

The writer sits, head in hands, amid a mound of crumpled paper wads. The deadline is tomorrow and not even the first paragraph is written. The writer has been working nonstop since the early morning hours. Frustration pushes the writer up from the chair and out on a long walk in the woods to the stream. After an hour of plunging through lush woods, a rest by the stream listening to the sounds of the rippling water is refreshing. Back at the typewriter, the fingers move, the words flow, the job is done.

Sometimes we need to quiet ourselves to let our inner resources flow through our outer noise. We are always doing what we are supposed to do. Even when things don't seem to come together just right, there is a purpose; even if only to let us know we need to do something else for a while.

How much simpler our lives can be if we only have the faith to accept what happens as a guidepost along a path that is naturally correct.

Am I frustrated with something I should step away from?

What kind of picture are we painting? Do I need to step back and look at it again and get another perspective? Do I need to get a second opinion? Am I portraying the picture in the proper form? Do people look at the picture and know, that I have a connection to my God and He is working through me to share my story with others.

Something worth while is always worth a second glance? When we make a decision, we can always stop, pause, pray, and make another decision.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 29, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles . . . by the ears, by the heels or any other way you can manage it. It's the healthiest thing a body can do.

—Mark Twain

It requires very little effort - and no imagination - to start feeling sorry for ourselves. Often, it is easy to feel sorry for ourselves in our families. Instead of being inspired by the sports talents of an older brother, the popularity of a lovely sister, or the fame of a parent or relative, we often take the easier attitude: "I'm denied all that he or she has."

If we work hard at developing our own abilities so that we can excel, we will find ourselves proud of, and applauding, what others do. If a personal problem brings us self-pity, we must remind ourselves that all people have problems. We can cope as well as the best of people if we learn from them and think positively.

Who among those close to me can I be proud of today?

Anyone who stays clean and sober, just for today. I can learn also from those who are still out there choosing to use, they do my research for me. I see them and don't want to go there.

I had a lot of false pride as a result of my disease. Today I am proud and grateful that the 12 Steps work for me, no matter which fellowship I choose to go to.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 30, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Come stand by my side where I'm going, Take my hand if I stumble and fall, It's the strength that you share when you're growing, That gives me what I need most of all.

—Hoyt Axton

The bear cub was miserable. Her father, the leader of the pack, had left a month ago to find them winter shelter and had not yet returned. Everyone went on as if nothing had changed.

One evening the cub had a dream in which her father appeared and said, "Daughter, I know you grieve for me, but your burden is too heavy to carry alone. Share it with the others and let them comfort you. Sharing will only lighten your load, and if you can accept help now you will find it easier to give when others are in need."

The next morning the little cub woke with a much lighter heart. As it turns out, everyone in the pack shared the same dream. There was much hugging and crying and reaching out and healing.

We can easily lighten our loads by asking support from those who love us, knowing our turn to help will come.

What help can I ask for today?

For several years, I have had to reach out and ask for help with house cleaning. My hands and arms have no strength in them, and if I wipe things, they don`t always seem to be clean.

I pray daily for my God to heal my perception, clarity, and help me to remove all blocks and barriers that I have erected that blocks me from Him, be the mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 31, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Withdrawal is a preparation for emergence.

—Nor Hall

A man lost his family in a car accident and wanted to be alone for a while, but he worried whether he was doing the right thing. Then one day a friend told him that when pine cones fall off the lodge pole pine trees, they are sealed shut so the seeds inside can't get out. The pine cones lie on the forest floor-sometimes for decades-until a forest fire sweeps through. Heat from the fire melts the seal and the seeds fall out and finally grow, and that's why the lodge pole pine is called a "fire-origin species."

The man felt good about himself when he heard the story. "Fire-origin species" is a good name for people who've been burned by life and find new growth as a result.

How have I grown because of pain and difficulty?

More acceptance and tolerance on a good day. Spiritual growth and getting to know myself and my body speaks and tells me what it needs.

Went to the market the other day, and bought two packages of cinnamon buns, a bit on the expensive side at $5. each. I hadn't been there for a while and told the seller, that I had been going through withdrawal. They are so good and I could eat them daily, but they would eat at my pocket book and it would allow my disease to come out and run rampant.