Today's Thought - October

[bluidkiti]

October 1

I have never seen a greater monster or miracle than myself.

~Montaigne

We know we’ve hurt people. We’ve heard our family cry out from the pain we’ve caused them. Because of alcohol and other drugs, we acted like monsters.

But we now live surrounded with love. We now work hard to make this world better. Recovery is a miracle. The rebirth of our spirit is our miracle.

It’s no wonder we love life the way we do! We’ve been given a second chance. Our joy is overflowing. The way we have been transformed through the will of our Higher Power and our work in the program is truly a marvel.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me manage the monster that lives within me. I pray that it will never again be let out.
Action for the Day

Today I’ll see myself as a miracle. I’ll be grateful for my new life.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple, Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal

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October 2

One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and, if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words.

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A spiritual man can nourish his growing spirit through enriching and beautiful experiences. Such experiences might be quiet meditation, listening to music, talking with a friend, or reading something that provides ideas to ponder. As men, we’ve been taught to focus on things more than on people. And, as we pursued goals and achievements, we neglected to provide ourselves with nourishment for our minds and souls.

Life’s experiences include joy and beauty and pain and grief. If we are uplifted every day by beauty in its many forms, we are strengthened and carried along to meet the tougher parts of our day. But to find those moments of beauty, we may need to push some other things aside. Perhaps some jobs can wait until tomorrow, and we can linger over a meal with our loved ones. Maybe mowing the lawn or fixing the car tonight isn’t as important as a half hour of good music. Do we make space for nourishing moments in each day?

I am grateful for the beauty all around. Help me keep life more balanced so I can receive the spiritual nourishment it provides.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones, A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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October 3

Being positive

For us to grow and develop spiritually, we need to examine our thoughts and beliefs. Do we look for the good in people, places, and events? Do we shed a positive light on all we come into contact with? To understand and accept is not to limit or control. Acknowledging the truth generates positive energy, positive thoughts, and a positive lifestyle.

Negative thinking produces negative habits. It undermines our morals so that we develop a “what’s the difference” attitude. But a positive faith in a Higher Power, as each of us understands it, gives strength to the body and courage to the soul.

Do I have positive beliefs?

Higher Power, may positive thoughts and beliefs be the guiding forces of my life.

I will cultivate positive beliefs today by…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day, Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts

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October 4

Reflection for the Day

Soon after I came to the program, I found a Higher Power. I’ve come to believe that my Higher Power has all power; if I stay close to my Power and do its work well, my Higher Power provides me not with what I think I want, but with what I need. Gradually, I’m becoming less interested in myself and my little schemes; at the same time, I’m becoming more interested in seeing what I can contribute to others and to life. As I become more conscious of my Higher Power’s presence, am I beginning to lose my self-centered fears?
Today I Pray

May I see that the single most evident change in myself—beyond my own inner sense of peace—is that I have come out from behind my phony castle walls, dropped the drawbridge that leads into my real village, and crossed it. I am back among people again, interested in them, caring what happens to them. May I find my joy here in this peopled reality, now that I have left behind those old self-protective fears and illusions of my own uniqueness.
Today I Will Remember

What is life without people?

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time, Daily Reflections for Recovering People

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October 5

Program meetings are like vitamins: Our need for them is ongoing.

A question newcomers frequently ask is “How long do I have to go to these meetings?” “Until you want to,” the old-timers reply. At first we don’t understand. But our lives begin to change because we are behaving in new ways, ways we’ve learned through the program.

We’ve probably heard that insanity means doing the same harmful thing repeatedly but always expecting a different outcome. That’s how we lived for years, no doubt. Now we have a new plan to live by and a new set of expectations. It’s wonderful and so comforting to realize that our lives today and in the future can be far more rewarding and serene as the result of taking our “daily vitamin.” Our growth and happiness will be ongoing if we make a commitment to the program.

My Twelve Step program gives me hope that today will be handled with ease. I will know what to do.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own, Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

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October 6

The trickster characters found in different world cultures are most often loved and seen as attractive, despite their comical flaws. Trickster energy, so often engaged in stepping beyond social norms, asks us to examine the question of what being attractive really means. At the same time, much of the trickster’s power is rooted in an ever-changing image.

Internet stories abound of people putting up one face on social media or dating websites while their “in-person” reality looks quite different. Why is there this need to pretend to be someone other than who we are? Usually it is based on some aspect of ourselves that we deem unacceptable, whether this is physical appearance or a specific character quality that does not quite measure up to some mysterious standard.

Much of the language of the Twelve Steps is about defects of character, and even though we stand firm in recovery, we may still view ourselves as somehow broken and unworthy. The first step in generating the energy of being attractive to others is to accept ourselves as we are, right now, this moment. Not some new and improved version we think we need to be, but the authentic being we see staring back at us in the mirror. We are all works in progress, learning to love who we are each step of our recovery journey.

I am whole right now, and ever changing, evolving into my amazing greatness!

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery

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October 7

Apologies

Sometimes, we act in a manner with which we are less than comfortable. That’s human. That’s why we have the words: “I’m sorry.” They heal and bridge the gap. But we don’t have to say “I’m sorry” if we didn’t do anything wrong. A sense of shame can keep us apologizing for everything we do, every word we say, for being alive and being who we are.

We don’t have to apologize for taking care of ourselves, dealing with feelings, setting boundaries, having fun, or getting healthy.

We never have to change our course, if it is in our best interest, but sometimes a general apology acknowledges other feelings and can be useful when the issues of a circumstance or relationship are not clear. We might say: “I’m sorry for the fuss we had. I’m sorry if what I needed to do to take care of myself hurt you; it was not intended that way.”

Once we make an apology, we don’t have to keep repeating it. If someone wants to keep on extricating an apology from us for the same incident, that is the person’s issue, and we don’t have to get hooked.

We can learn to take our apologies seriously and not hand them out when they’re not valid. When we feel good about ourselves, we know when it’s time to say we’re sorry and when it’s not.

Today, I will try to be clear and healthy in my apologies, taking responsibility for my actions and nobody else’s. God, help me figure out what I need to apologize for and what is not my responsibility.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations on Codependency

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October 8

You can’t be a good egg all your life—you either have to hatch or go bad.

~Fr. Ralph Pfau

We must all take our turn at being followers until we’re ready to lead. So, until that time, we follow by listening to others, doing as they do, leaning on their wisdom and experience.

Then the time comes for us to assume leadership. This is the point when we have heard most of what the others have to say and received most of what the group has to give. By applying those principles and practices in our daily lives, we have become ready to take on a different role.

There will always be people who are just becoming aware of themselves as adult children. They will come to meetings hesitantly and be looking to us for comfort, direction, challenge, and wisdom. They give us our chance to share the gifts we’ve received. The quality of the leadership we have to offer is entirely dependent on our willingness and ability to take responsibility when the time comes.

Today, I will assess my progress in the program. I will not lose any opportunity to share what I have learned.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy, Daily Meditations for Adult Children

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October 9

Every man has to learn the points of the compass again as often as he awakes, whether from sleep or any abstraction.

~Henry David Thoreau

The secret, for us, is to never let our recovery wander away from us. We keep a good compass by working the Steps. Working the Steps tells us what we need to be doing and where we need to go in our recovery. Our sponsor helps us with this and helps us stay on course.

We also need the energy behind us to keep us from getting stalled out. We keep this energy—this “tailwind”—by making our program a way of life. The more we put ourselves in its path, the more the recovery wind keeps us moving. We stay in the path of this wind by going to meetings at least once a week and by using recovery tools as a matter of habit every day.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me remember that my spirituality has a lot to do with the way I use my life energy.
Today's Action

Are there days when I’d like to skip my reading, my prayer, my meetings, my conscious contact with my Higher Power? I will talk with my sponsor about a plan to get through this kind of day next time it comes up.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me, More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple

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October 10

Do not make yourself so big—you are not so small.

~Jewish saying

Many of us are so used to being competitive that, even when there is nothing at stake, we exaggerate our qualities and boast of our accomplishments. We sometimes display what we may call a “grandiose ego”—pretentious and false. This is particularly true of addicts because we often feel the need to hide behind an inflated image of ourselves. Why? Because we’re afraid of being found out. We think we can prevent people from knowing all about us.

As we move into recovery, we find that we gain insight and confidence about ourselves. We are no longer shame-based people, so we don’t need to hide behind a mask. Our sexuality is now ours to delight in and not a source of fear and shame. We gain a sense of proportion in our lives and a viable perspective on who we are.

We are now neither angels nor beasts, and we can be proud to be human.

I am glad to be at a place where I can be fully human, whether I’m alone or with others.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart, Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction

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October 11

Serenity

Serenity = Reality = Inner peace and strength

~Anonymous

Most of us chased an elusive thing called serenity for years. We thought our journeys outside reality brought us peace and serenity. When we returned to reality we found harshness and pain that caused us to run back to using. So it went, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. Run, escape, pain; run, escape, pain.

Then something happened. Our addiction wouldn’t let us escape any more. We no longer found what we were seeking. We tried using more heavily. Finally, all that was left of our lives was the pain.

The fellowship shows us that reality is not a problem. Trying to escape reality is a problem. When we continue to turn our wills and lives over to a Higher Power, the serenity that results creates a reality of inner peace and strength.

I trust and believe that the changes I am going through in my recovery are necessary and good for me.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It, A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations

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October 12

Planning is only the ego’s decision to be anxious now.

~Hugh Prather

Making plans and assumptions about the future means that we don’t entirely trust God to guide us. It also means we think we know now exactly what the future should be. Or, we might be afraid of what will happen in the future, so we plan, thinking we can somehow control it.

What happens when we waste time worrying about the future? We overlook what’s going on right now. Looking ahead, we keep ourselves from getting the most out of this moment, and the next moment, and the next. When making plans to visit a new place, we have to make reservations and buy the tickets, but we can’t plan every moment of our agenda, and we can’t worry about what may happen to us while we’re there.

I will trust God for what I need when its time comes.

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October 13

The strength of the drive determines the force required to suppress it.

~Mary Jane Sherfey

We are all struggling to succeed. And each day of our lives we'll be confronted with major or minor adversities that might well interfere with our success. Adversities don 't have to hinder us, however. They can strengthen us, if we incorporate them as opportunities for growth.

For many of us, the ability to handle adversity is a fairly recent phenomenon. And not always can we do it securely and with ease. But we are coming to believe that a power greater than ourselves is at hand and will guarantee us all the strength we'll ever need. Knowing that action is always possible, that passive acceptance of any condition need never be necessary, are unconditional gifts of living the Twelve Step program.

Our path forward is as certain as our commitment to it, our belief in the strength of the program, and our faith that all is well even when times are troubled. No one ever promised that our new way of life would be always easy. But we have been promised that we'll arrive at our proper destination if we do the footwork and let God do the navigating.

Success is at hand. I will apply what I'm learning, and I’ll meet it.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning, Daily meditations for Women

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October 14

It’s not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.

~Addison Walker

Being considerate, civil, generous, and interested in others forms the basis of good character and good relationships with others. When we stop being so focused on ourselves, when we stop trying to come out ahead of everyone else, our world opens up. We suddenly have good, supportive friendships that are more valuable than material winnings.

The Golden Rule is ancient advice that is expressed in many languages and world religions. It says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” It is a small man who takes away someone else’s power to advance his own. A strong man can confidently cheer for the strength of others.

Today, I am grateful for the good friends in my life.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones, More Daily Meditations for Men

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October 15

AA Thought for the Day

One of the mottoes of AA is “First things first.” This means that we should always keep in mind that alcohol is our number-one problem. We must never let any other problem—whether of family, business, friends, or anything else—take precedence in our minds over our alcoholic problem. As we go along in AA, we learn to recognize the things that may upset us emotionally. When we find ourselves getting upset over something, we must realize that it’s a luxury we alcoholics can’t afford. Anything that makes us forget our number-one problem is dangerous to us. Am I keeping sobriety in first place in my mind?
Meditation for the Day

Spiritual progress is the law of your being. Try to see around you more and more of beauty and truth, knowledge and power. Today try to be stronger, braver, more loving as a result of what you did yesterday. This law of spiritual progress gives meaning and purpose to your life. Always expect better things ahead. You can accomplish much good through the strength of God’s spirit in you. Never be too discouraged. The world is sure to get better, in spite of setbacks of war, hate, and greed. Be part of the cure of the world’s ills rather than part of the disease.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may keep progressing in the better life. I pray that I may be a part of the forces for good in the world.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day, A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life

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October 16

I never lose sight of the fact that just being is fun.

~Katharine Hepburn

The first good news each day is that we wake up. We are breathing. Our hearts are beating, our minds working. The adventure of living begins. What does the day hold in store? We have no way of knowing what surprises lie in wait for us today.

We may look forward, not just to the expected, but to the unexpected. Whom shall we meet? What will we see? What will we learn? How will we be entertained? What chances to help others will come our way? What chances to love and be loved?

Now that our eyes are opened to today's beauty, let us remain alert for new sights. Let us cry when sad, smile when touched, and laugh at what is funny in a whole new lifetime before us.

What can I be thankful for today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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October 17

Here’s my Golden Rule: Be fair with others but then keep after them until they’re fair with you.

~Alan Alda

In our illness we were often ashamed, so we let people take advantage of us. We acted as if we had no rights. In recovery, we work hard to be fair with others. And we deserve to be treated with fairness too. If people are mean to us, we talk with them about it. If people cheat us, we ask them to set it right. In recovery, we live by our human rights.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to stand for fairness. Help me respect myself and others.
Action for the Day

Today I’ll list people who have wronged me. I will make plans to talk to those whom I feel will listen. I will let love, not shame or fear, control my actions.

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple, Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal

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October 18

I am still learning.

~Michelangelo’s motto

Is it okay for a man to say he does not know? Our myths of masculinity tell us we are supposed to know all about how to be great lovers, how to do a job, how to get from here to there. We should never look confused or bewildered because someone will think we are weak. But this is certainly a boyish attitude! How will we ever learn anything new if we can’t look like beginners? That’s the way to be an underachiever. In our growing up, we can shed these small ideas and have the strength to admit we don’t always know.

Many of us have had the experience of growing in years without growing more mature. Having a sponsor is one of the ways we can clearly arrange to be learners. We can also learn from the fellowship of other men and women in our group. To be learners, we need to be honest and straightforward about what we already know and what we don’t. When we are willing to be learners, we grow emotionally.

I will be honest about things I don’t know, so I can continue to learn.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones, A Book of Daily Meditations for Men

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October 19

Meditating

In our old lives we were busy giving orders, making demands, and directing others. Now we find it is time to try to listen. Prayer is talking to your Higher Power; meditation is listening to your Higher Power. There are as many types of meditation as there are individuals. We find that daily meditation is vital to keeping perspective.

Have I learned to meditate?

I pray that I may learn to listen to my Higher Power so that I may be in harmony with the Higher Forces.

Today I will listen to my Higher Power by meditating about…

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day, Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts

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October 20

Reflection for the Day

Someone once said that the mind’s direction is more important than its progress. If my direction is correct, then progress is sure to follow. We first come to the program to receive something for ourselves, but soon learn that we receive most bountifully when we give to others. If the direction of my mind is to give rather than to receive, then I’ll benefit beyond my greatest expectations. The more I give of myself and the more generously I open my heart and mind to others, the more growth and progress I’ll achieve. Am I learning not to measure my giving against my getting, accepting that the act of giving is its own reward?
Today I Pray

May I not lose sight of that pillar of the program—helping myself through helping others in our purpose of achieving comfortable sobriety. May I feel that marvel of giving and taking and giving back again from the moment I take the First Step. May I care deeply about others’ maintaining their freedom from substances, and may I know that they care about me. It is a simple—and beautiful—exchange.
Today I Will Remember

Give and take and give back again.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time, Daily Reflections for Recovering People

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October 21

No experience is without meaning.

Often we assume that the experiences we want are the most important ones for our development as human beings. But that may not be the case at all. Experiences that seem insignificant at the time, or ones that are not at all what we want, might prove to be key to our future growth. We are unfolding purposefully. Where today’s experience takes us is quite by design.

Most of us wish that at least some things could be different. Maybe we think we deserve a better job or a happier, sober marriage. Maybe our children rarely live up to our high expectations. We get trapped into thinking we deserve better. And perhaps we are getting a heavy share of tough experiences to handle. But God is always with us, and everything that comes to us is intended to contribute to the person we are becoming.

Our perspective can lead to appreciation or dread. Deciding to see every situation as a blessing would significantly change us and what happens in our lives.

I am living an adventure today. God will give me experiences that I need. I may want other experiences, but God’s love guarantees I’ll get what I need.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own, Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

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October 22

Some observers see human beings as grounded in our love of play, and view all of the natural world as the creative activity of the divine—a Higher Power who is sportive, frolicsome, and joyful.

It is part of our higher nature to marry raw, uninhibited energy with emerging skills, to bring forward a spark of our unique creative passion. Playful artistry dances between the conscious and unconscious, calling forth deep memories within us. When we cook a good meal, dance spontaneously around the living room, make love under the stars, or allow music to bring us to tears, we are immersed in the language of sacred play—the parlance of lila, which is a Sanskrit word that depicts cosmic vitality and the free play of the gods in creative expression.

The business of recovery is serious business, and there are so many goals to move toward as we make up for years lost in addictive haze. Our innate craving to reach beyond ourselves and playfully explore, even as we work hard in recovery, is often obscured by the demands of our new “adult” life as recovering individuals. Yet we must remember how exquisite it is to be swept away by creative amusement and passionate living.

I welcome the magnificent sense of play that still flows within me as I do the serious work of recovery.

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery

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October 23

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

~Step Ten of Al-Anon

Once we have worked our way to this Step, we can maintain and increase our self-esteem by regularly working Step Ten. This Step incorporates the process we have gone through in Steps Four through Nine. We do not work this Step to punish ourselves or to hold ourselves under a constantly critical and demeaning microscope. We do it to maintain self-esteem and harmony in our relationship with ourselves and others. We do it to stay on track.

When an issue or problem emerges and needs our attention, identify it and openly discuss it with at least one safe person and God. Accept it. Become willing to let go of it. Ask God to take it from us. Have a change of heart by the willingness to make whatever amend is called for—to do what is necessary to take care of ourselves. Take an appropriate action to resolve the matter. Then let go of the guilt and shame.

This is a simple formula for taking care of ourselves. This is how we change. This is how we become changed. This is the process for healing and health. This is the process for achieving self-responsibility and self-esteem.

The next time we do something that bothers us, the next time we feel off track or off course, we don’t have to waste our time or energy feeling ashamed. We can take a Tenth Step. Let the process happen. And move on with our life.

God, help me make this Step and other Steps a habitual way of responding to life and my issues. Help me know that I am free to live, to allow myself to fully experiment with and experience life. If I get off course, or if an issue arises that demands my attention, help me deal with it by using the Tenth Step.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations on Codependency

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October 24

I could accept everybody else’s vulnerability—but not my own.

~Mae L

We’ve all heard it’s more blessed to give than to receive. Fewer of us have heard that receiving is equally blessed and also a lot more difficult. Does someone need our compassion, our time, our money? Just ask us, and we’ll give it. Gift giving is just our cup of tea. Oh, but to be on the receiving end—that is another matter. To wholly accept a love-gift is beyond many of us. Receiving is painful. It makes us nervous and suspicious. It makes us feel vulnerable. We are strangers to the wisdom that receiving is the deepest form of giving.

Authentic love not only forgives the vulnerability and mistakes of others, but receives that forgiveness. To wholly accept forgiveness means we can’t go around flogging ourselves for our mistakes and failures. We have to let it go and receive the truth that we are pardoned.

To receive the love of others is to remove the mask of perfection, and forgive ourselves for being human.

Today, I will examine my behavior as a receiver as well as a giver of love.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy, Daily Meditations for Adult Children

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October 25

I’ve learned that you can’t have everything and do everything at the same time.

~Oprah Winfrey

We wanted it all. We wanted to feel good all the time. We wanted to be right and have everyone see how right we were. We wanted to always be at the center of all the action. We wanted life to adjust to us, instead of us adjusting to life. What a house of cards. Often we wanted so much because we felt so empty inside.

If we try and do it all and have it all, we will fail. Life has limits, so we have to make choices. As we go through life, we pick and choose. We put together a good or poor life. In recovery, we learn that we are to pick people over things, principles over ego, and values over sensations. All of this involves stopping and thinking. We need to reflect on what our Higher Power wants for us. Instead of trying to do everything, we just concentrate on doing the next right thing. Over time we stop wanting everything and start to see we are enough, and we have enough.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to see that with you, my friends, and my family, I am enough. When I feel empty, direct me toward that which feeds my spirit instead of my desires.
Today's Action

Today I will sit, reflect, and make a list of how my desire to have everything got me in trouble. I will then share this information with a friend.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me, More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple

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October 26

The usual drawback of success is that it annoys one’s friends so.

~P.G. Wodehouse

Some of us really do fear success, partly because of the responsibility. But often the real reason is that we still do not feel worthy.

As practicing addicts, we feared disclosure. We often shunned the spotlight and led obscure, desperate lives. We may still tend to flee success because we might be subject to scrutiny…and perhaps be unmasked. Others would see us as we really are—or as we are afraid we are. And we are so used to thinking of ourselves as failures that we don’t see how we could possibly earn or deserve success. So how can we win?

We need to remind ourselves that we don’t have to fall back into our old self-defeating attitudes. In recovery we can’t sustain these attitudes; our new friends won’t let us. Gradually we find we are moving away from fear of failure and fear of success. As our self-esteem grows, we become more confident in our abilities to live a productive and joyful life.

I am beginning to feel happy and successful in whatever I choose to undertake.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart, Daily Meditations for Men and Women Recovering from Sex Addiction

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October 27

Solution

Be part of the solution, not the problem.

~Anonymous

When we were practicing our addiction, we traveled alone. We created short-term friendships with fellow users. These dissolved when the “party was over.” Our addiction demanded from us absolute obedience. There could be no intimate friendships. No relationship was more important than the addiction. Anyone that moved in too close was beaten away by the disease. We were solitary, held hostage in our own prison.

The fellowship has broken the grip of this isolation. The miracle of recovery is that of men and women sharing their experience, strength, and hope with each other. We are together; we share with each other what we know, what we experience; we rely on each other. The fellowship is a circle of spiritual vitality that energizes anyone who decides to join hands.

Alone I am the problem. Together with others, I am part of the solution.

Today's reading is from the book Easy Does It, A Book of Daily Twelve Step Meditations

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October 28

Life is an adventure in forgiveness.

~Norman Cousins

We aren’t perfect. We were taught the Golden Rule when we were young, but practiced it with mixed success. We continue to tread on one another’s toes and hearts with regularity, not because we’re mean, but because we can be insensitive at times.

In recovery we are learning to be more thoughtful, caring, and responsible in our actions, but at the same time, we have to intimately understand the meaning of forgiveness. Practicing forgiveness—both accepting and giving it—removes so much of the anxiety and tension from our relationships.

Our need for forgiveness does not signify failure. Asking for forgiveness brings us closer to God and others. The walls our actions often create come down when we become vulnerable and say, I’m sorry, please forgive me. Two minds and hearts may be quickly joined and find healing in this most intimate exchange.

I’ll treat others the way I want to be treated today, and willingly ask for forgiveness if I need to.

Today's reading is from the book In God's Care, Daily Meditations on Spirituality in Recovery

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October 29

My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue. An everlasting vision of the ever-changing view.

~Carole King

Every event of our lives is contributing a rich thread to our personal tapestry. Each of us is weaving one unique to ourselves, but all of our tapestries are complementary. We need others' rich designs in order to create our own.

We seldom have the foresight to understand the worth, the ultimate value of a particular circumstance at its beginning. But hindsight offers us clarity. It's good to reflect on the many circumstances that failed to thrill us; in all cases we can now see why we needed them. As our trust in God and the goodness of all experiences grow, we'll more quickly respond with gladness when situations are fresh. No experience is meant for harm. We are coming to understand that, even though on occasion we forget.

Practicing gratitude will help us more fully appreciate what has been offered us. Being grateful influences our attitude; it softens our harsh exterior and takes the threat out of most new situations.

If I greet the day, glad to be alive, I will be gladdened by all the experiences in store for me. Each is making a necessary contribution to my wholeness.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning, Daily meditations for Women

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October 30

If a man does his best, what else is there?

~General George S. Patton

For many of us, competition is so ingrained that we have a knee-jerk competitive reaction to almost every encounter with another man. Competition is great fun among friends. Testing our skill, our power, and our wits against others helps us know ourselves better and shows us what we are capable of. It is a kind of closeness among friends to playfully compete. But when competition becomes our only way to relate to others, it keeps people away. When we can only respond with a wisecrack or a one-up comment, we are just a one-trick pony, reacting out of weakness and fear of getting close.

Among true and trusted friends, a man is entitled to show more than his strength and his guarded side. A true friend doesn’t use our vulnerability or our mistakes to take advantage of us. When he holds them as a trust that he guards and protects, he shows the mark of true friendship.

Today, I will be the best person that I can be, and that includes honesty about my weaknesses and vulnerability.

Today's reading is from the book Stepping Stones, More Daily Meditations for Men

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October 31

Whenever we engage in playful activities, our body is active and energized, and our mind is alert. Our emotions tend to be spacious and elevated, our spirit open and accepting. This is a prime example of the flow state, in which we get lost in an eternal present where heart, mind, and body are aligned with action and intent.

Free from the suffering and drama of our addictions, we can now embrace the best of trickster’s playfulness without concern about how others might judge us. We can take time to walk in the rain, jump in mud puddles, collect images of rainbows, smell wild flowers, blow bubbles, build sandcastles, watch the moon and stars come out, read children’s books, act silly, take a bubble bath, fly kites, say the magic words, talk with animals, climb trees, have pillow fights, tell stories, and do anything else that brings more happiness, celebration, and a sense of freedom to our life.

While we honor the ongoing work necessary to heal old wounds and develop positive habits, our guiding mantra for today is to just have fun. We embody the primal and youthful purity of the free, rambunctious, joyful play energy.

I enjoy finding different ways of being outrageously playful.

Today's reading is from the book Cornerstones, Daily Meditations for the Journey into Manhood and Recovery