View Full Version : Daily Recovery Readings - October
bluidkiti
09-22-2021, 08:10 AM
October 1
Daily Reflections
LEST WE BECOME COMPLACENT
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest
on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol
is a subtle foe.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85
When I am in pain it is easy to stay close to the friends I have
found in the program. Relief from that pain is provided in the
solutions contained in A.A.'s Twelve Steps. But when I am feeling
good and things are going well, I can become complacent. To put
it simply, I become lazy and turn into the problem instead of the
solution. I need to get into action, to take stock: where am I and
where am I going? A daily inventory will tell me what I must
change to regain spiritual balance. Admitting what I find within
myself, to God and to another human being, keeps me honest and humble.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
A.A. will lose some of its effectiveness if I do not do my share.
Where am I failing? Are there some things I do not feel like doing?
Am I held back by self-consciousness or fear? Self-consciousness is
a form of pride. It is a fear that something may happen to you.
What happens to you is not very important. The impression you
make on others does not depend so much on the kind of job you
do as on your sincerity and honesty of purpose. Am I holding back
because I am afraid of not making a good impression?
Meditation For The Day
Look to God for the true power that will make you effective. See
no other wholly dependable supply of strength. That is the secret
of a truly effective life. And you, in your turn, will be used to help
many others find effectiveness. Whatever spiritual help you need,
whatever spiritual help you desire for others, look to God. Seek
that God's will be done in your life and seek that your will conforms
to His. Failures come from depending too much on your own strength.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may feel that nothing good is too much for me if I look
to God for help. I pray that I may be effective through His guidance.
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As Bill Sees It
Troubles of Our Own Making, p.272
Selfishness--self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our
troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion,
self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and
they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without
provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we
have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a
position to be hurt.
So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They
arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of
self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so. Above
everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must,
or it kills us!
Alcoholics Anonymous, p.62
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Walk In Dry Places
Thinking about Blame.
Inventory.
Which is worse: blaming ourselves or others for things that go wrong?
A better question might be, Is anyone to blame?
We're really better off, in 12 Step living, to begin dropping the idea of
placing blame for our thinking altogether. Even is someone's responsibility
for a mistake or wrong is fully evident, we get nowhere by pointing the
finger at him or her. What often happens, in fact, is that the person
becomes defensive... just as we do... And retreats into denial or anger.
Another problem is that placing blame quickly becomes the sticky
business of taking another person's inventory. Let's leave such matters
to courts and prosecutions and focus instead on solving our own problems.
I'll not waste time today thinking about who's to blame. My focus will
be on what can be done for general improvement.
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Keep It Simple
Continued to take personal inventory. . .First half of Step Ten
Step Ten tells us to keep looking at who we are. We ask ourselves,
“Is what I’m doing okay?”
If it is, then we take pride in the way we're acting. If not, we change our
behavior. Step Ten keeps us in the right direction.
Throughout time, wise persons have told us to get to know ourselves.
Step Ten helps us do this.
We become our own best friend. A true friend tells us when we’re doing
right and when we’re messing up. Step Ten is our teacher. Even when
we want to pretend we don’t know right from wrong, Step Ten reminds
us that we do know. Step Ten is our daily reminder that we now have
values---good values.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, Step Ten is a lot of work. Keep me
working. Help me form a habit. Let this habit be called “Step Ten.”
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll continue to take a personal inventory.
I will list what is good about me today and what I don’t like.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Women are often caught between conforming to existing standards
or role definitions and exploring the promise of new alternatives.
--Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
This is a time of exploring for many of us. Recovery means change
in habits, change in behavior, change in attitudes. And change is
seldom easy. But change we must, if we want to recover successfully.
We do have support for trying our new alternatives. We have support
from our groups and our higher power. Perhaps we want a career or
more education. Perhaps we want to develop a hobby or try a sport.
Sharing that desire and then looking for support guarantees some
guidance. This program has given us a chance to start fresh--
to become our inner desire.
We are only caught in an old pattern if we assent to it. The going
won't always be easy, but support and guidance are available and
free if we but look for them.
Today I will consider my alternatives. Do I want to make a change?
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 10 - To Employers
Today I own a little company. There are two alcoholic employees, who produce as much as five normal salesmen. But why not? They have a new attitude, and they have been saved from a living death. I have enjoyed every moment spent in getting them straightened out.*
* See Appendix VI-We shall be happy to hear from you if we can be of help.
pp. 149-150
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
When I am willing to do the right thing, I am rewarded with an inner peace no amount of liquor could ever provide. When I am unwilling to do the right thing, I become restless, irritable, and discontent. It is always my choice. Through the Twelve Steps, I have been granted the gift of choice. I am no longer at the mercy of a disease that tells me the only answer is to drink. If willingness is the key to unlock the gates of hell, it is action that opens those doors so that we may walk freely among the living.
p. 317
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
So how, exactly, can the willing person continue to turn his will and his life over to the Higher Power? He made a beginning, we have seen, when he commenced to rely upon A.A. for the solution of his alcohol problem. By now, though, the chances are that he has become convinced that he has more problems than alcohol, and that some of these refuse to be solved by all the sheer personal determination and courage he can muster. They simply will not budge; they make him desperately unhappy and threaten his newfound sobriety. Our friend is still victimized by remorse and guilt when he thinks of yesterday. Bitterness still overpowers him when he broods upon those he still envies or hates. His financial insecurity worries him sick, and panic takes over when he thinks of all the bridges to safety that alcohol burned behind him. And how shall he ever straighten out that awful jam that cost him the affection of his family and separated him from them? His lone courage and unaided will cannot do it. Surely he must now depend upon Somebody or Something else.
p. 39
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"How things look on the outside of us depends on how things are
on the inside of us."
--Parks Cousins
I shall continue to believe. In hope there is faith, miracles do happen,
in God I trust.
--Shelley
Time is my most precious resource, I choose to use it wisely and
to cherish each moment, sober.
--Bob
I have a choice, I do not have to accept unacceptable behavior.
--Shelley
Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide
upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There
are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are
right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some
of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it
takes brave men and women to win them.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
Some people make the future; most wait for the future to make them.
--Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES
There is a choice you have to make, In everything you do. And you
must always keep in mind, The choice you make, makes you.
--Unknown
You can preach a better sermon with your life than you can with your lips.
--Unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LAUGHTER
"We are all here for a spell, get
all the good laughs you can."
-- Will Rogers
When I first heard recovering alcoholics laughing, I thought I was
in the wrong place. I was angry that they treated the disease so lightly.
Then slowly I began to see that laughter is part of joy --- a deep joy that
comes from personal healing. Laughter is spiritual because it is a
positive response to life. It is the noise of optimism.
And there is so much in life to laugh about --- not only the funny things
we did, but also the "humor" that abounds in living. How funny is our
self-righteousness! How amusing we are in courtship. How ridiculous we
appear when we pretend to be serious and "in charge".
Laughter is the conversation of angels.
Let me see the miracle of humor in the gift of life --- and let me be
prepared to share it.
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Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
Philippians 4:6
"Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs."
Proverbs 10:12
Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself.
James 2:17
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Daily Inspiration
Don't give up because your best has not yet been achieved. Lord,
take away my doubts and give me courage to accept my opportunities.
Often times that which we find difficult is that which teaches. Lord,
may I always be able to see the good that comes from even my trials.
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NA Just For Today
Not just a motivation for growth
Page 287
"We learn that pain can be a motivating factor in recovery."
Basic Text, p.30
"Pain-who needs it!" we think whenever we're in it. We see no good purpose for pain. It seems to be a pointless exercise in suffering. If someone happens to mention spiritual growth to us while we're in pain, we most likely snort in disgust and walk away, thinking we've never encountered a more insensitive person.
But what if human beings didn't feel pain-either physical or emotional? Sound like an ideal world? Not really. If we weren't capable of feeling physical pain, we wouldn't know when to blink foreign particles out of our eyes; we wouldn't know when to stop exercising; we wouldn't even know when to roll over in our sleep. We would simply abuse ourselves for lack of a natural warning system.
The same holds true for emotional pain. How would we have known that our lives had become unmanageable if we hadn't been in pain? Just like physical pain, emotional pain lets us know when to stop doing something that hurts. But pain is not only a motivating factor. Emotional pain provides a basis for comparison when we are joyful. We couldn't appreciate joy without knowing pain.
Just for Today: I will accept pain as a necessary part of life. I know that to whatever level I can feel pain, I can also feel joy.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Perhaps nature is our best assurance of immortality. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Everything in nature contributes to something else--like the hundred-year-old tree that stood tall until a wind storm. The protection it gave to thousands of birds and squirrels it now gives to insects and fungi. As it slowly decays, it nourishes the ground, and from the enriched soil grow several other trees. We human beings are part of this eternal cycle, our ideas and actions enriching those around us and influencing generations yet to come. Being part of this vast plan gives us comfort, and faith that everything that happens is meant to be. Our hearts fill with joy with the knowledge that we are needed; just as every tree is needed.
How do I fit into nature's plan today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
It was football time, apple time, harvest time, hunting time, and school time. Footsteps quickened. It was exciting to be in transition. It seemed more like the beginning of something than like the end of it. --Paul Gruchow
Some days seem filled with the exciting energy of change. They are like walking on a bridge from one time period to the next. In the fall, our senses are filled with messages of change. Trees tell us it is happening. So do football games, and the cool chill in the morning air.
As summer wanes and winter approaches, we may need to grieve for what we leave behind before greeting what comes next. The changes we experience in recovery bring similar responses. We grieve the loss of our old friends, the bottle, the food binge, the romantic thrill, or the excitement of gambling or spending. We are able to grieve our losses because we accept them. We have chosen them. Now we move to the next season of our lives.
As I experience the circle of seasons outside me, I am grateful for the ongoing flow of change within.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Women are often caught between conforming to existing standards or role definitions and exploring the promise of new alternatives. --Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
This is a time of exploring for many of us. Recovery means change in habits, change in behavior, change in attitudes. And change is seldom easy. But change we must, if we want to recover successfully.
We do have support for trying our new alternatives. We have support from our groups and our higher power. Perhaps we want a career or more education. Perhaps we want to develop a hobby or try a sport. Sharing that desire and then looking for support guarantees some guidance. This program has given us a chance to start fresh--to become our inner desire.
We are only caught in an old pattern if we assent to it. The going won't always be easy, but support and guidance are available and free if we but look for them.
Today I will consider my alternatives. Do I want to make a change?
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Be Who You Are
In recovery, we're learning a new behavior. It's called Be Who You Are.
For some of us, this can be frightening. What would happen if we felt what we felt, said what we wanted, became firm about our beliefs, and valued what we needed? What would happen if we let go of our camouflage of adaptation? What would happen if we owned our power to be ourselves?
Would people still like us? Would they go away? Would they become angry?
There comes a time when we become willing and ready to take that risk. To continue growing, and living with ourselves, we realize we must liberate ourselves. It becomes time to stop allowing ourselves to be so controlled by others and their expectations and be true to ourselves - regardless of the reaction of others.
Before long, we begin to understand. Some people may go away, but the relationship would have ended anyway. Some people stay and love and respect us more for taking the risk of being whom we are. We begin to achieve intimacy, and relationships that work.
We discover that who we are has always been good enough. It is who we were intended to be.
Today, I will own my power to be myself.
I am grateful for the power I have over the future of my life. I am being guided at all times to use my power with wisdom and with love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 1
Are You Ready, Willing, and Able?
Have you cleared the path you want to travel? Are you ready, willing, and able to do whatever it takes to have what you want?
Decide what you want. Be as clear as you can be. Say it. Write it. Share your idea with a friend. Then ask yourself if you are ready, willing, and able to do what it takes to have what you want. Ask yourself the question as often as you need to.
Watch how you feel when you say what you want. Look for objections, blocks from within, obstacles on your path. Look closely at yourself, your fears, your angers, your resistance. Let your feelings come up, acknowledge them, then let them go. One after another remove the blocks until the path you want to travel is clear. Remove the obstacles until you can clearly see your vision and your voice is strong and clear. I’m ready, willing, and able to have what I want and it’s in my highest good.
The way to your dreams, the way to make your visions come alive is by taking a journey inside your soul. Are you ready, willing, and able to have what you want? Do you believe it when you hear yourself say it? When you do, the road will be clear, and you’ll be ready to travel the path you desire.
*****
more language of letting go for October
Say I see
I was out at the drop zone one day soon after I'd begun skydiving, when the idea occurred to me. I know, I thought, I'll get a cabin out here, on a little hill with a hot tub, fireplace, and lined inside with scented cedar wood.
Wouldn't it be nice, I thought, to live high on a hill and look down at night at the twinkling lights, overlooking the city and the lake?
I didn't think much more about it, until the cold, rainy season started. Then, despite all my efforts to repress the dream of the cabin, it just popped up and sprang right out from inside of me.
I called my friend Kyle and asked him if he was busy. He said no. So I asked him if he had some time to go driving around with me.
"I just want to check out the area," I said. "Let's see if the cabin's there. Let's just drive to where my intuition takes me."
We drove down highway fifteen when an exit approached. Taking the exit felt like the thing to do. We turned off and started driving west. I looked to my right and suddenly felt an urge to drive up the hill. So we followed the road, driving by one house after another. Finally, at the end of the road, there was a small cabin at the top of a hill. The outside was covered with rough-sawn cedar. A brick fireplace covered the front of the house. A hot tub sat in the backyard. And a for sale sign was posted in the frontyard.
There are other pieces to this story. Chip got in on the dream. At some point we stopped calling it "the cabin," and it became the Blue Sky Lodge. Pat and Andy came along and helped make the dream real. It was going to be a comfortable place for people who liked to do things in the air. We'd have extra beds available. It wouldn't be a hotel, but it was open to any guest who wanted to spread his or her wings and learn how to fly.
We camped at the Lodge during construction, Everything took longer than we thought, but eventually it turned into the place of our dreams.
There's a pool table, a dartboard, a whimsical guest room called the clown room, a comfy guest bedroom, a living room with a massive stone fireplace and a big-screen TV. Then there's the Blue Room, a master bedroom with blue plaid material on the walls. It houses the biggest, most comfortable bed in the world-- the Cloud Bed-- and my desk.
Red beams line the cedar wood ceiling. Chip has a desk in the foyer, and there's video cameras and regular cameras and computers on top of it. And there's books and CDs and flight bags and parachutes and helmets and climbing ropes lying around all over the house.
The Blue Sky Lodge is really about learning that your dreams can come true.
Whether your dreams for yourself come to you in bits and pieces, over a period of time, or whether you practice visualization to see and focus on your dreams yourself, dreams are just another way of God communicating with us
She's saying, "Look at what you can have."
An important part of the language of letting go is learning to say, "I see what I can have, who I am, where I am, and what I have right now."
God, help me become aware.
*****
Observing Evolution
Allowing Others to Walk Their Paths by Madisyn Taylor
It is important to allow others to walk their own path because it is just that, their own path.
Watching a loved one or a peer traverse a path littered with stumbling blocks can be immensely painful. We instinctively want to guide them toward a safer track and share with them the wisdom we have acquired through experience. Yet all human beings have the right to carve their own paths without being unduly influenced by outside interference. To deny them that right is to deny them enlightenment, as true insight cannot be conveyed in lectures. Rather, each individual must earn independence and illumination by making decisions and reflecting upon the consequences of each choice. In allowing others to walk their paths freely, you honor their right to express their humanity in whatever way they see fit. Though you may not agree with or identify with their choices, understand that each person must learn in their own way and at their own pace.
The events and circumstances that shape our lives are unique because each of us is unique. What touches one person deeply may do nothing more than irritate or confound another. Therefore, each of us is drawn to different paths—the paths that will have the most profound effects on our personal evolution. If you feel compelled to intervene when watching another human being make their way slowly and painfully down a difficult path, try to empathize with their need to grow autonomous and make their own way in the world. Should this person ask for your aid, give it freely. You can even tell them about your path or offer advice in a conscious loving way. Otherwise, give them the space they need to make their own mistakes, to enjoy the fruits of their labors, to revel in their triumphs, and to discover their own truths.
The temptation to direct the paths of others is a creature of many origins. Overactive egos can convince us that ours is the one true path or awaken a craving for control within us. But each person is entitled to seek out their path leading from the darkness into the light. When we celebrate those paths and encourage the people navigating them, we not only enjoy the privilege of watching others grow—we also reinforce our dedication to diversity, independence, and individuality. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We can be surrounded by people and still feel lonely. We can be all by ourselves and still feel happy and content. What makes the difference? We feel lonely if we look to other people for something they really can’t provide. None else can give us peace of mind, an inner sense of acceptance, and serenity. And when we find ourselves alone, we needn’t feel lonely. God is with us; His presence is like a warm shawl enfolding us. The more we’re aware of ourselves as beloved by God, the more we’re able to feel content and secure — whether we’re with others or when alone. Am I experiencing a sense of God and His love at all times and in all places?
Today I Pray
May I understand that we each have our own kind of loneliness — whether we are young and friendless, old and kept waiting by death, bereft, left, running away, or just feeling out of it in a crowd. May my loneliness be eased a bit by the fact that loneliness is, indeed, a universal feeling that everyone knows first hand — even though some lives seem more empty than others. May I — and all the lonely people — take comfort in the companionship of God.
Today I Will Remember
Shared loneliness is less lonely.
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One More Day
Solitude is not measured by the miles of space that intervene between a man and his fellows.
– Henry David Thoreau
Solitude is the time we choose to be alone, but it becomes loneliness when we believe we have no choice. When we are lonely, we feel trapped in a web of isolation.
Lonely people are caught in a trap with only themselves for company. There can be a difference between loneliness and aloneness — or solitude.
We are finding ways to create solitude from loneliness. We strive to fill our lives with meaningful experiences such as work, family, hobbies, and relationships with friends. As we enrich our lives with these activities, our alone time becomes solitude — a peaceful time to withdraw from the world and into thoughts, prayers, and meditation.
A moment of solitude today can enrich and replenish me.
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Food For Thought
Being True
Without rigorous honesty, we do not recover from compulsive overeating. We need to be honest about what we eat and honest about how we feel. In the past, we covered up pain with sugar frosting and tried to drown our inadequacies in carbohydrates. The time has come to deal with truth.
Alone, we are not perceptive enough to see the truth, nor strong enough to bear it. It is through our Higher Power and the OA fellowship that we are able to become true to the best that is in us. We admit that we have been living falsely, and we turn over our muddled lives so that God may straighten them out. His spirit is truth, and the light of that truth is what we need for our recovery.
Our Higher Power shows us how to be true step by step, as we are ready to progress. Each day we become more in touch with our real selves and each day our strength increases. Being true sets us free from compulsive overeating and free from the false values, hopes, and expectations, which have inhibited us.
Lead me into truth.
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One Day At A Time
The Fear of Failure
“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare;
it is because we do not dare that things are difficult.”
Seneca
I was full of excuses: “I can’t start a food plan. Won't it be the same as a diet? I’m a free spirit! I don't like such restrictions! If I can’t do something perfectly, why should I even start? I do it perfectly, or I don’t do it at all! I have gone too far to ever go back to being anywhere near healthy. I don’t have time to plan my Food. I am young. I have plenty of time to worry about taking off the weight!”
These were my favorite excuses. Underlying all the excuses was the fear of failure. I did not know that true failure comes about by not ever having tried. My life circumstances never got better by ignoring my problems with food. Ignoring my condition began to complicate every aspect of my life.
This moment I have a choice. I dare to choose in the next few moments even one small thing that I can do to make my life better or more healthful.
One day at a time...
If I cannot think of anything, I will pause and ask my Higher Power to help me learn to choose.
~ January K.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The distinguished American psychologist, William James, in his book 'Varieties of Religious Experience,' indicates a multitude of ways in which men have discovered God. We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try. Those having religious affiliations will find here nothing disturbing to their beliefs or ceremonies. There is no friction among us over such matters. - Pg. 28 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Sometimes we are confused about what to do. But we tell people, 'Do the next right thing.' We do know what is right and what is wrong from the age of seven. Often our mind tries to muddy our thinking by making excuses or rationalizing. You really do know the right thing to do.
Higher Power, of my understanding, please let me respond to the right and wrong of my Higher Self--for the basic knowledge that was once so clear.
My Family Illness
My family has a disease and it's not me. My family drinks poison and serves poison up to each other, but I don't have to. My family chooses to deny the impact of addiction and the trauma that follows it but I don't have to. My family defends their right to stay sick but I want to get well. My family, for whatever reason, is determined to not identify the family illness that has made us all sick. But the illness stands out to me in Technicolor. I see it and I trust my own eyes.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
When you place your sponsor on a pedestal you are like a child bragging to the other kids, 'Nah, nah, nah, my sponsor is better than your sponsor!'
I don't place my sponsor on a pedestal. It is only from a high place that they can fall.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Addiction: touched by an angle. Recovery: touched by an angel.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
As I am learning to see the world through the eyes of love and compassion, I am becoming more and more full of love and compassion for myself and others.
I deserve to feel good about myself today and I am learning how.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Why I tell you how long I've been sober is that there are so many new things happening in AA that one day we might get a pension plan going here, and I want to get my full benefit! - Norm A.
bluidkiti
09-22-2021, 08:10 AM
October 2
Daily Reflections
THE ACID TEST
As we work the first nine Steps, we prepare ourselves for
the adventure of a new life. But when we approach Step Ten
we commence to put our A.A. way of living to practical use,
day by day, in fair weather or foul. Then comes the acid
test: can we stay sober, keep in emotional balance, and
live to good purpose under all conditions?
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 88
I know the Promises are being fulfilled in my life, but I
want to maintain and develop them by the daily application
of Step Ten. I have learned through this Step that if I am
disturbed, there is something wrong with me. The other
person may be wrong too, but I can only deal with my feelings.
When I am hurt or upset, I have to continually look for the
cause in me, and then I have to admit and correct my mistakes.
It isn't easy, but as long as I know I am progressing
spiritually, I know that I can mark my effort up as a job well
done. I have found that pain is a friend; it lets me know there
is something wrong with my emotions, just as a physical pain
lets me know there is something wrong with my body. When I take
the appropriate action through the Twelve Steps, the pain
gradually goes away.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
What makes an effective talk at an A.A. meeting? It is not a
fine speech with fine choices of words and an impressive
delivery. Often a few simple words direct from the heart are
more effective than the most polished speech. There is always
a temptation to speak beyond your experience, in order to
make a good impression. This is never effective. What does not
come from the heart does not reach the heart. What comes from
personal experience and a sincere desire to help the other
person, reaches the heart. Do I speak for effect or with a deep
desire to help?
Meditation For The Day
"Thy will be done" must be your oft-repeated prayer. And in
the willing of God's will there should be gladness. You should
delight to do that will because when you do, all your life goes
right and everything tends to work out for you in the long run.
When you are honestly trying to do God's will and humbly
accepting the results, nothing can seriously hurt you. He who
accepts the will of God in his life may not inherit the earth,
but he will inherit real peace of mind.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have a yielded will.
I pray that my will be attuned to the will of God.
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As Bill Sees It
Compelling Love, p.273
The life of each A.A. and of each group is built around our Twelve
Steps and Twelve Traditions. We know that the penalty for
extensive disobedience to these principles is death for the individual
and dissolution for the group. But an even greater force for
A.A.'s unity is our compelling love for our fellow members and for
our principles.
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You might think the people at A.A.'s headquarters in New York
would surely have to have some personal authority. But, long ago,
trustees and secretaries alike found they could do no more than
make very mild suggestions to the A.A. groups.
They even had to coin a couple of sentences which still go into half
the letters they write: "Of course you are at perfect liberty to
handle this matter any way you please. But the majority experience
in A.A. does seem to suggest . . ."
A.A. world headquarters is not a giver of orders. It is, instead, our
largest transmitter of the lessons of experience.
1. Twelve Concepts, p.8
2. 12 & 12, pp. 173-174
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Living or Waiting?
Using time wisely
What is the real secret of living 24 hours at a time? Isn't it really a
matter of feeling completely comfortable in the present rather than
believing that happiness depends on something in the future?
Whatever our situation today, it's something we must live through and
deal with effectively. We may be overlooking many wonderful things
in our present life simply because we believe we need some exciting
experience that can only come later on.
We also might be overlooking present opportunities because we're
spending too much time in the past. The past, whether it was good or
bad, is beyond our control.
Our mission is to live effectively and happily today. We can do this
best when we realize that yesterday and tomorrow don't really exist...
today is all we can be sure of.
I'll live today in the present, handling every problem as well as I can
and enjoying every experience that comes to me.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
. . .and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.---Second half of Step Ten
We are human. We make mistakes. This is half the fun of being human.
Step Ten clearly tell us what to do when we are wrong: admit it. This
keeps us honest. It keeps us from hiding secrets that could cause us to
use alcohol or other drugs again.
Trust the gift we get from Step Ten. When we admit our wrongs, people
start to trust us again. We feel good, and people feel good being around us.
Even when they don’t like how we act, they can trust us to run our lives.
No one will ever be perfect. The closest we get is that we admit it when
we’re wrong. This is as good as it gets.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me admit my wrongs. Help me
earn the trust of others by being honest about my mistakes.
Action for the Day: I will list any wrongs I’ve done today. That way,
I’ll start tomorrow fresh and without any burdens from today.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Fortunate are the people whose roots are deep. --Agnes Meyer
Deep roots offer strength and stability to an organism. They
nourish it plentifully. They anchor it when the fierce winds blow.
We each are offered the gifts of roots when we give ourselves
fully to the program.
We are never going to face, alone, any difficult situation after
discovering recovery. Never again need we make any decision
in isolation. Help is constant. Guidance through companionship
with others and our contacts with God will always be as close as
our requests. The program anchors us; every prayer we make,
every step we take, nourishes the roots we are developing.
Becoming rooted in the program, with daily attention to the
nourishment we need, offers us sanity and hope. We discover
that all things can be handled; no situation is too much for us.
Strength, confidence, freedom from fear are the benefits of
our deepening roots. We will be anchored if we do what needs
to be done by us. The program's gifts are ours, only if we work
the program.
I won't neglect my roots today. I will nourish them so they in
turn can fill me up with confidence when my need is there.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
FOR MOST normal folks, drinking means conviviality, companionship and colorful imagination. It means release from care, boredom and worry. It is joyous intimacy with friends and a feeling that life is good. But not so with us in those last days of heavy drinking. The old pleasures were gone. They were but memories. Never could we recapture the great moments of the past. There was an insistent yearning to enjoy life as we once did and a heartbreaking obsession that some new miracle of control would enable us to do it. There was always one more attempt—and one more failure.
p. 151
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Over the course of my sobriety I have experienced many opportunities to grow. I have had struggles and achievements. Through it all I have not had to take a drink, nor have I ever been alone. Willingness and action have seen me through it all, with the guidance of a loving Higher Power and the fellowship of the program. When I'm in doubt, I have faith that things will turn out as they should. When I'm afraid, I reach for the hand of another alcoholic to steady me.
pp. 317-318
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
At first that "somebody" is likely to be his closest A.A. friend. He relies upon the assurance that his many troubles, now made more acute because he cannot use alcohol to kill the pain, can be solved, too. Of course the sponsor points out that our friend's life is still unmanageable even though he is sober, that after all, only a bare start on A.A.'s program has been made. More sobriety brought about by the admission of alcoholism and by attendance at a few meetings is very good indeed, but it is bound to be a far cry from permanent sobriety and a contented, useful life. That is just where the remaining Steps of the A.A. program come in. Nothing short of continuous action upon these as a way of life can bring the much-desired result.
pp. 39-40
************************************************** *********
Friends in your life are like pillars on your porch. Sometimes they hold
you up and sometimes they lean on you. Sometimes it's just enough to
know they're standing by.
--Elizabeth Foley
"Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes
misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate."
--Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965)
"In the hope of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet."
--Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965)
When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in
the life of another.
--Helen Keller
"God, I do believe in Your power and Your wisdom. Your glory is far
greater than I could ever envision, and I am thankful to be within the circle of your
ever-renewing life."
--©2000 by Unity School of Christianity
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
REALITY
"The books that the world calls
immoral are the books that show
the world its own shame."
-- Oscar Wilde
In my addiction I avoided things that I did not like, did not want to consider. I hid from life
and condemned things I did not wish to understand. My ego created a hypocritical purity
that enabled me to judge, condemn and abuse the thoughts and ideas of those I
considered inferior to myself.
Today I try to live and let live. I do this not to avoid conflict or criticism but because I
have found, through experience, how my ideas and attitudes have changed during my
years of recovery. People who I would have condemned to Hell have now become my
friends and mentors. Concepts and lifestyles that were once abhorrent to me are now
appreciated and inspiring. What was once dismissed as immoral is today, for me, a part of
life.
God of Truth and Reality, help me to accept the difference that is in others.
************************************************** *********
May my meditation be pleasing to Him as I rejoice in the Lord.
Psalm 104:34
"Lord, I believe."
John 9:38
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
The condition of your heart is reflected in your face. Lord, help me to
remove all harsh feelings from within my soul so that I will radiate
love and kindness and others can feel safe in seeking me out.
If you exercise your mind, your spirit will never get old. Lord, give
me the ability to rise above my worldly burdens and ability to always
make things a little better.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Keeping faith
Page 288
"We grasp the limitless strength provided for us through our daily prayer and surrender as long as we keep faith and renew it."
Basic Text, p.46
There are two parts to recovery: getting clean, and staying clean. Getting clean is comparatively easy because we only have to do it once. Staying clean is more difficult, requiring attention every day of our lives. Yet both draw their power from faith.
We got clean on faith. We admitted that addiction was more powerful than we were, and we stopped trying to fight it on our own. We turned the battle over to a Power greater than ourselves, and that Higher Power got us clean. We stay clean each day the same way: on faith. Just for today, we surrender. Life may be too big for us to tackle on our own power. When it is, we seek a Power greater than ourselves. We pray, asking our Higher Power for direction and the strength to follow it. By exercising and renewing our faith on a daily basis, we tap the resources we need to live clean, full lives.
There is limitless strength available to us whenever we need it. To grasp it, all we need to do is keep faith in the Higher Power that got us clean and keeps us clean.
Just for Today: Faith got me clean, and faith will keep me clean. Today, I will keep faith with my Higher Power. I will renew my surrender and pray for knowledge and strength.
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Stars have always helped me to get things into perspective . . . I tried to let the starlight heal something deep in me that hurt. --Madeleine L'Engle
For a long time, people have used stars to find their way in the dark. Many a lost soul has been guided by the North Star or the Big Dipper.
If we watch the sky at night, we can see thousands of twinkling stars. They are our friends. They remind us how small we are. They remind us of the vastness of the universe, of the power and beauty that surround us.
Starlight in the sky, or reflected on a lake, can comfort us when we hurt. With safe and open arms, nature accepts our sorrow, no matter how we express it. Starlight, like all of nature, reflects a light that comes from way beyond us. It is that light that heals us in a deep and quiet way.
How has nature comforted me when I am troubled?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
One ought, each day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if possible, speak, a few reasonable words. --Goethe
A spiritual man can nourish his growing spirit through enriching and beautiful experiences. Such experiences might be quiet meditation, reading something, which provides ideas to ponder, conversation with a friend, or listening to music. Men have been taught to focus on things more than on people, on goals and achievement, and we neglect to provide ourselves with nourishment for our minds and souls.
Life's experiences include joy and beauty and pain and grief. If we are uplifted every day by beauty in its many forms, we are strengthened and carried along to meet the tougher parts of our day. We may need to push some other things aside to have it. Perhaps some jobs can wait until tomorrow, and we can linger over a meal with our loved ones. Maybe mowing the lawn or fixing the car isn't as important as a half-hour of good music. Do we make space for nourishing moments in each day?
I am grateful for the beauty all around. Help me keep life more balanced so I can receive the spiritual nourishment it provides.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Fortunate are the people whose roots are deep. --Agnes Meyer
Deep roots offer strength and stability to an organism. They nourish it plentifully. They anchor it when the fierce winds blow. We each are offered the gifts of roots when we give ourselves fully to the program.
We are never going to face, alone, any difficult situation after discovering recovery. Never again need we make any decision in isolation. Help is constant. Guidance through companionship with others and our contacts with God will always be as close as our requests. The program anchors us; every prayer we make, every step we take, nourishes the roots we are developing.
Becoming rooted in the program, with daily attention to the nourishment we need, offers us sanity and hope. We discover that all things can be handled; no situation is too much for us. Strength, confidence, freedoms from fear are the benefits of our deepening roots. We will be anchored if we do what needs to be done by us. The program's gifts are ours, only if we work the program.
I won't neglect my roots today. I will nourish them so they in turn can fill me up with confidence when my need is there.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Coping with Families
There are many paths to self-care with families. Some people choose to sever connections with family members for a period of time. Some people choose to stay connected with family members and learn different behaviors. Some disconnect for a time, and then return slowly on a different basis.
There is no one or perfect way to deal with members of our family in recovery. It is up to each of us to choose a path that suits us and our needs at each point in time.
The idea that is new to us in recovery is that we can choose. We can set the boundaries we need to set with family members. We can choose a path that works for us, without guilt and obligation or undue influence from any source, including recovery professionals.
Our goal is to detach in love with family members. Our goal is to be able to take care of ourselves, love ourselves, and live healthy lives despite what family members do or don't do. We decide what boundaries or decisions are necessary to do this.
It's okay to say no to our families when that is what we want. It's okay to say yes to our families if that feels right. It's okay to call time out and it's okay to go back as a different person.
God, help me choose the path that is right for me with family. Help me understand there is no right or wrong in this process. Help me strive for forgiveness and learn to detach with love, whenever possible. I understand that this never implies that I have to forfeit self-care and health for the good of the system.
As I am learning to see the world through the eyes of love and compassion, I am becoming more and more full of love and compassion for myself and others. I deserve to feel good about myself today and I am learning how. --Ruth Fishel
************************************
Journey To The Heart
October 2
Trust the Unknown
Look! See how much you’ve changed. See the difference in your perspective.
Remember all those years you were so fearful, trying to peek ahead, trying to see what the future held. Remember how upset you got, how uncertain and abandoned you felt because you didn’t know the plan.
Now life has taken you to a new place, a new place for you but a place that is ancient. All along, you were not supposed to be getting the answers about what the future held. You were supposed to be learning the magical way of trust and inner guidance, learning to feel your way through, trusting and committing to your vision, your energy, your purpose, your place, each day and moment along the way. You were supposed to be learning to allow the universe to magically unfold and trust that it would. You have been learning this lesson. You have been learning it well.
See how you delight in life’s magic now, the surprises, the not knowing, the absolute trust in the universe to bring you your answers, manifest your visions, and help you when you can’t quite see. See how much you cherish your relationship to the universe, a relationship so much broader and more encompassing, so much more vital that you could ever before imagine. See how joyfully you walk your path, enjoying all the sights, opening your heart to loved one and strangers.
See how benevolent it really is when you are not able to see ahead. Not knowing has taught you about life’s magic. It has connected you to yourself and to the universe. It has connected you to God.
Not knowing has taught you to know more than you could ever imagine.
*****
more language of letting go
Manifest your reality
In the skydiving world, at drop zones, there's usually a small office where the sky diver goes. This office or place is called manifest. The potential sky diver must submit the ticket and be assigned to a particular flight. Sometimes things happen. The winds might pick up, canceling that particular flight. The sky might cloud over. Something could happen that would change that sky diver's mind about getting on the plane. But for all purposes, once you've been to manifest, you're going to be at the door of the airplane looking down 12,500 feet with a group of sky divers yelling at you to jump.
If you don't want to be at that door, trying to let go and wondering how you got yourself there, don't make the trip to manifest.
It's easy to see how events get manifested in the skydiving world. Sometimes it's more difficult to see the manifest office in our daily lives.
"How did I get here," we say, looking around at the city we live in, the person we married, or the job we have. Of course, destiny and our Higher Power play a large part in where we are.
But so do we.
Choices we make lead us along. The big decisions we make help shape our destiny. Our thoughts, intentions, and inagination have more to do with shaping our present moment that we could ever imagine.
The problem is that usually there's a gap between our intentions or behavior and seeing them manifest in reality. By the time an event takes place, we've forgotten that B happened because we did A. It's difficult to see the progressive effect of the many choices we make in a day.
I'm not saying that we create everything that happens to us. We don't have that much power. But God alone didn't send a lot of the stuff that comes our way. We created much of it ourselves.
Be aware of the words you use, especially those combined with powerful emotions or will. If we're going to manifest something in reality, let's make it good.
God, show me the creative powers I possess, especially my power to manifest events in my life. Teach me to use these powers to create harmony and beauty in the world.
*****
Hidden Gems
Experiences We Don't Understand
Sometimes we have an experience that we don’t understand, but if we look deeply, or wait long enough, a reason for that experience will usually reveal itself. All the events in our lives lead to other events, and all that we have manifested in this present moment is the result of past events and experiences. We cannot easily tease apart the many threads that have been woven together to create our current reality. Experiences that don’t make sense, as well as any that we regret, are just as responsible for the good things in our lives as the experiences we do understand or label as "good."
This is especially important to remember at times when we feel directionless or unsure of what to do. It is often at times like these that we take a job or move to a place without really knowing if it’s the right thing to do. We may ultimately end up leaving the job or the place, but often during that time we will have met someone who becomes an important friend, or we may have an experience that changes us in a profound way. When all the pieces of our life don’t quite make sense, we can remember that there may be some hidden gem of a reason that we are where we are having the experiences we are having.
It’s fun to look back on past experiences with an eye to uncovering those gems—the dreadful temporary job in a bland office building that introduced you to the love of your life; the roommate you couldn’t tolerate who gave you a book that changed your life; the time spent living in a city you didn’t like that led you into a deeper relationship with yourself. Remembering these past experiences can restore our faith in the present. Life is full of buried treasures. Chances are, you’re sitting on some right now. Published with permission from Daily OM
************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
An entire philosophy of life is condensed in the slogan Live and Let Live. First we’re urged to live fully, richly and happily — to fulfill our destiny with the joy that comes from doing well whatever we do. Then comes a more difficult challenge: Let live. This means accepting the right of every other person to live as he or she wishes, without criticism or judgement from us. The slogan rules out contempt for those who don’t think as we do. It also warns against resentments, reminding us not to interpret other people’s actions as intentional injuries to us. Am I becoming less tempted to involve my mind with thoughts of how others act or live?
Today I Pray
May I live my life to the fullest, understanding that pure pleasure-seeking is not pleasure-finding, but that God’s goodness is here to be shared. May I partake of it. May I learn not to take over the responsibility for another adult decisions; that is my old controlling self trying , just one more time, to be the executive director of other people’s lives.
Today I Will Remember
Live and Let Live.
************************************
One More Day
God wrote His loveliest poem on this day
He made the first tall, poplar tree,
And set it high upon a pale-gold hill
For all the now enchanted earth to see.
– Grace Noll
Autumn was such a wonderful time when we were youngsters. Raking meant gleefully jumping into mountains of leaves and later gathering with our families to watch the blazing piles.
We can still enjoy the trees and leaves around us. If we take time to observe even a single leaf, we will again be surprised as its beauty, its perfection. The golden or red or brown leaf is a small part of nature’s balance.
We enjoyed trees before; we can find multiple ways to enjoy them now. Like all of the world around us, the leaves lend color, beauty, and meaning to our lives, if we only look.
All natural beauty deserves a second look before I turn away.
************************************
Food For Thought
The Power of Faith
A very small amount of faith is all that is required to begin the OA program. Hearing the stories of those who have changed and found new life gives us faith in the program. Coming to the limit of our resources makes us willing to try believing in a Higher Power, or at least acting as if we believed.
Sometimes we resist believing because deep down we do not want to change. When we honestly want to stop eating compulsively more than we want anything else, we will be given the necessary faith.
Faith grows as we work the program. As we see results, we are encouraged to keep trying in spite of setbacks. When we are able to stop eating compulsively through OA and our Higher Power, we come to believe that we can succeed in other areas of life, as well. Faith spreads to include other accomplishments, which before had seemed impossible. Through the power of faith, we are able to become all that God intends us to be.
May our faith grow daily.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
COMPULSIONS
“All human actions have one or more of these seven causes:
chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, desire.”
Aristotle
When I was eating compulsively, it was similar to taking nitrous oxide at my dentist. Like a heavy anesthesia, the food comforted me and gave me an extraordinary sense of well-being. Like many short-term cures for what is bothering us, it took its toll. Any resemblance to reality while in the fog of compulsive eating is purely coincidental. While there may be times in my life I needed anesthesia, to use it day in and day out to block emotional pain is a burden only compulsive eaters know about.
Compulsion is self-will gone berserk. I try to think of it as the opposite of effortless abstinence. Between the two are miles and miles of varying experiences. For me there was never moderation ... only the two extremes. It took several years of squeaky clean abstinence to trust myself and begin to try moderation in eating. At that point I had learned to recognize and be aware of the dangers of that first compulsive bite. There have been times when this cunning disease always waiting to pounce has sent me straight back to hell as a result of that one single compulsive bite.
One day at a time...
I will pray that my actions are caused by anything except compulsions.
~ Mari
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God. - Pg. 46 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
How do we know that this process of sobriety is valid for us? We all ask this at one time or another. But we need to give the program time. How long has addiction had? Months, years, decades? Ask this same question at the same time, next year. Why not judge the effect on your life then when there is an 'effect' to judge?
Higher Power, as I understand You, grant me the ability to stay clean and sober today, so in future 'todays' I will be able to judge the effect of sobriety.
A Reservoir of Peace Within Me
I have a reservoir of peace within me into which I can retreat for safety. There is peace in the heart of God. Today I rest in the awareness that God's presence is in my heart and that is where I can go for shelter. I will bring all of my consciousness into my heart and become one with God consciousness. I can feel safe from whatever is happening around me if I do this. I can feel protected when I go here. I can tolerate what I previously thought was intolerable if I know where to go to find shelter, to find peace, to find love.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The greatest fault of all is to be conscious of none.
Referring to my list again, I put out of my mind the wrongs others have done, and look at what my part is. (adapted from the AA Big Book, P 67)
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The longer you've been in recovery, the more successful you've been in the past.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I choose to be in places and situations and with people where I feel good about myself.
I deserve to feel good and I trust that my heart will tell me where to go.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them. - Albert Einstein. ] = 'Early Bird promises for the first year: You will continually know what city, state, and country you are in; You'll answer the door with reckless abandon; You will have a solid bowel motion - Some people think that's their first spiritual experience. - Ken D.
bluidkiti
09-26-2021, 11:27 AM
October 3
Daily Reflections
SERENITY AFTER THE STORM
Someone who knew what he was talking about once remarked that
pain was the touchstone of all spiritual progress. How heartily
we A.A.'s can agree with him. . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p p. 93-94
When on the roller coaster of emotional turmoil, I remember that
growth is often painful. My evolution in the A.A. program has
taught me that I must experience the inner change, however painful,
that eventually guides me from selfishness to selflessness. If I
am to have serenity, I must STEP my way past emotional turmoil and
its subsequent hangover, and be grateful for continuing spiritual
progress.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
How do I talk with new prospects? Am I always trying to dominate
the conversation? Do I lay down the law and tell prospects what
they will have to do? Do I judge them privately and feel that they
have small chance of making the program? Do I belittle them to
myself? Or am I willing to bare my soul so as to get them talking
about themselves? And, then, am I willing to be a good listener,
not interrupting, but hearing them out to the end? Do I feel deeply
that they are my brothers or my sisters? Will I do all I can to help
them along the path to sobriety?
Meditation For The Day
"The work of righteousness shall be peace and the effect of
righteousness shall be quietness and assurance forever." Only
when the soul attains this calm, can there be true spiritual work
done, and mind and soul and body be strong to conquer and bear all
things. Peace is the result of righteousness. There is no peace in
wrong doing, but if we live the way God wants us to live, quietness
and assurance follow. Assurance is that calmness born of a deep
certainty of God's strength available to us and in His power to love
and guard us from all harm and wrong doing.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may attain a state of true calmness.
I pray that I may live in quietness and peace.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Going It Alone, p. 274
Going it alone in spiritual matters is dangerous. How many times
have we heard well-intentioned people claim the guidance of God
when it was plain that they were mistaken? Lacking both practice
and humility, they deluded themselves and were so able to justify
the most arrant nonsense on the ground that this was what God had
told them.
People of very high spiritual development almost always insist on
checking with friends or spiritual advisers the guidance they feel
they have received from God. Surely, then, a novice ought not lay
himself open to the chance of making foolish, perhaps tragic,
blunders. While the comment or advice of others may not be
infallible, it is likely to be far more specific than any direct guidance
we may receive while we are still inexperienced in establishing
contact with a Power greater than ourselves.
12 & 12, p. 60
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Proving Ourselves
Self-esteem
Long after a bitter failure, some of us still cling to the hope that we
can erase the defeat in some spectacular way. One dream is to
“prove ourselves” to those who scorned us or put us down.
This never really works, even when we do become winners at some
later time. For one thing, we may be proving ourselves to people
who never will like us. If we are striving to show others that we
can succeed, we are still dancing to their tune. We are accepting
their idea of what success should be.
Many of us failed simply because we were alcoholics and could do
no better. We might have destroyed opportunities that will never
rise again. But by finding sobriety, we may already have proved
ourselves to those who really count in our lives...... Including ourselves.
I can prove today that the Twelve Step program works and that a
loving Higher Power is present in my life.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
That which is called firmness in a king is called stubbornness in a
donkey. ---Lord Erskine
“Rigid” is a fancy word for “stubborn.” We act this way because
of our fear. When we’re afraid, we hang on to what we’re used to
doing. Our illness had us so scared, we were afraid of the new ideas
and new people. The only thing that didn’t scare us was using alcohol
or other drugs.
We also were stubborn when anyone tried to help us. We thought we
knew what was best. How silly our stubborn actions made us look!
How lonely they kept us.
But our stubborn behavior can teach us about our fears. We need to
be aware our stubbornness. Then we’ll be able to find out what we’re
afraid of---and do something about it.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know when I’m stubborn.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll work at accepting my stubbornness.
I will use it to learn what I am afraid of today.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Ambiguity means admitting more than one response to a situation and
allowing yourself to be aware of those contradictory responses. You may
want something and fear it at the same time. You may find it both beautiful
and ugly. --Tristine Rainer
Flexibility is a goal worth the striving. It eases our relations with others,
and it stretches our realm of awareness. Letting go of rigid adherence to
what our perceptions were yesterday assures us of heightened understanding
of life's variables and lessons.
Being torn between two decisions, feeling ambivalent about them, need not
create consternation, though it often does. Hopefully, it will encourage us to
pray for direction, and then to be responsive to the guidance. And we must
keep in mind that no decision is ever wrong. It may lead us astray for a time,
but it will also introduce us to uncharted territories, which offer many
opportunities for flexibility.
Contradictory responses, our own and also ours in relations with others,
keep us on our toes, lend an element of excitement to our lives, and push
us to think creatively about our perceptions. Growth and change are guaranteed.
I will be in tune with myself today. I will let my perceptions guide me.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself. As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. It thickened, ever becoming blacker. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval. Momentarily we did—then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen—Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair. Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand.
p. 151
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Life has not heaped monetary riches upon my head, nor have I achieved fame in the eyes of the world. My blessings cannot be measured in those terms. No amount of money or fame could equal what has been given me. Today I can walk down any street, anywhere, without the fear of meeting someone I've harmed. Today my thoughts are not consumed with craving for the next drink or regret for the damage I did on the last drunk.
p. 318
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
It is when we try to make our will conform with God's that we begin to use it rightly. To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the misuse of willpower. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is the purpose of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens the door.
p. 40
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One of the most time-consuming things is to have an enemy.
--E. B. White
Love your enemies. It will drive them nuts.
--Eleanor Doan
"A keen sense of humor helps us to overlook the unbecoming,
understand the unconventional, tolerate the unpleasant,
overcome the unexpected, and outlast the unbearable."
--Billy Graham
"We're still not where we're going, but we're not where we were."
--Natasha Jasefowitz
"Behavioral researcher Shad Helmstetter, in his book "Choice," says,
'When we meet someone who seems to have a good attitude about everything,
that really isn't the case. The person simply has made a lot of independent
choices to have a
good attitude about many individual things." Remember, a positive outlook is a
choice - and the decision is yours."
--Neil Eskelin
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FREEDOM
"Freedom is not enough. "
-- Lyndon B. Johnson
The gift of freedom requires the acknowledgment of the benefactor, God. To experience
freedom without realizing its source is to miss the point; freedom requires responsibility.
When I was drinking, I demanded freedom without responsibility and I suffered. I created
in freedom my own horror stories. I hurt others because I did not respect in them what I
demanded for myself and slowly, ever so slowly, freedom slipped away.
Today I believe that my spiritual program reinforces my responsibility for my life. God
has created me with free will and I need to respect this gift in others. If I do not respect
others, I will never receive it. Dignity is a two way street.
Thank You for the freedom to experience myself in my treatment of my neighbor.
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Look to the Lord and his strength; seek His face always.
Psalm 105:4
Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping,
carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him.
Psalm 126:5-6
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Daily Inspiration
Be like a star and make your best even better. Lord, source of my joy, if I
am shining I will brighten the day for both myself and those around me.
There is a time for everything. Take time to pray, to sing, to laugh, to work
and to touch the hearts of others. Lord, help me be aware that today will never
return so that I will not misuse my time or waste it unwisely.
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NA Just For Today
Page 289
"Our egos, once so large and dominant, now take a back seat because we are in harmony with a loving God. We find that we lead richer, happier, and much fuller lives when we lose self-will."
Basic Text, p.105
Addiction and self-will go hand in hand. The unmanageability that we admitted to in Step One was as much a product of our self-will as it was of our chronic drug abuse. And today, living on self-will can make our lives just as unmanageable as they were when we were using. When our ideas, our desires, our demands take first place in our lives, we find ourselves in constant conflict with everyone and everything around us.
Self-will reflects our reliance on ego. The only thing that will free us from self-will and the conflict it generates in our lives is to break our reliance on ego, coming to rely instead on the guidance and power offered us by a loving God.
We are taught to consult spiritual principles, not our selfish desires, in making our decisions. We are taught to seek guidance from a Higher Power, one with a larger vision of things than our own. In doing this, we find our lives meshing more and more easily with the order of things around us. No longer do we exclude ourselves from the flow of life; we become a part of it, and discover the fullness of what recovery has to offer.
Just for Today: I seek freedom from ego and the conflicts generated by self-will. I will try to improve my conscious contact with the God of my understanding, seeking the guidance and power I need to live in harmony with my world.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
How easy the breath that kills a flame,
How hard to kindle that light again.
Cold words kill and kind words kindle,
By words withheld a dream may dwindle.
--Joan Walsh Anglund
How we treat the people we live with affects the happiness of our family. Just as a breath can blow out a flame, a mean remark can cast a shadow across a brother or sister's heart. People of all ages have left dreams behind because no one encouraged them. They are like candles snuffed out.
On the other hand, if we see a friend or family member feeling good about something they have done, we can learn to be happy for them. If we notice their excitement and encourage them with kind and sincere words, it will help their candle burn brighter. Sharing the happiness of others will make our own candles burn brighter, and it always feels good when we receive kind words ourselves.
In what ways can I bring light and warmth with my words today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
You should not have your own idea when you listen to someone.... To have nothing in your mind is naturalness. Then you will understand what he says. --Shunryu Suzuki
A man who is mistrustful and self-centered has difficulty listening to someone else. Perhaps a woman we are close to wants to be understood by us. But we do not hear her on her own terms because we are so intensely involved with our own shame. So we react to our feelings of guilt rather than really hearing what she wants to say about her experience. Or we may be so worried about who has control that we fail to receive the information we are being given. Then we respond with "Yes, but..."
True learning comes - like true intimacy - when we have an open mind. As we detach ourselves, separate from our own ego, we hear the other person better and grow more intimate.
May I learn to set aside my own self-centeredness. Today, I will grow more if I set my ego aside when others are talking to me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Ambiguity means admitting more than one response to a situation and allowing yourself to be aware of those contradictory responses. You may want something and fear it at the same time. You may find it both beautiful and ugly. --Tristine Rainer
Flexibility is a goal worth the striving. It eases our relations with others, and it stretches our realm of awareness. Letting go of rigid adherence to what our perceptions were yesterday assures us of heightened understanding of life's variables and lessons.
Being torn between two decisions, feeling ambivalent about them, need not create consternation, though it often does. Hopefully, it will encourage us to pray for direction, and then to be responsive to the guidance. And we must keep in mind that no decision is ever wrong. It may lead us astray for a time, but it will also introduce us to uncharted territories, which offer many opportunities for flexibility.
Contradictory responses, our own and also ours in relations with others, keep us on our toes, lend an element of excitement to our lives, and push us to think creatively about our perceptions. Growth and change are guaranteed.
I will be in tune with myself today. I will let my perceptions guide me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting Through the Discomfort
Surrender to the pain. Then learn to surrender to the good. It's there and more is on the way. --Beyond Codependency
Our goal in recovery is to make us feel comfortable, peaceful, and content. Happy. We want to be at peace with our environment and ourselves. Sometimes, to do that, we need to be willing to face, feel, and get through discomfort.
I am not talking here about being addicted to misery and pain. I am not talking about creating unnecessary pain. I'm talking about the legitimate discomfort we sometimes need to feel as we heal.
When we have surgery, the pain hurts most the day after the operation. When we do the kind of work we are facing in recovery, we are doing an emotional, mental, and spiritual surgery on ourselves. We're removing parts of us that are infected and inflamed.
Sometimes the process hurts. We are strong enough to survive discomfort and temporary feelings of emotional pain. Once we are willing to face and feel our discomfort and pain, we are almost to the point of release.
Today, I am willing to face my discomfort, trusting that healing and release are on the other side. Help me, God; be open to feeling whatever I need to feel to be healed and healthy. While I am doing this, I will trust I am cared for and protected by my friends, my Higher Power, the Universe, and myself.
I choose to be in places and situations and with people where I feel good about myself. I deserve to feel good and I trust that my heart will tell me where to go. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 3
Finish Unfinished Business
Finish your business with people. Unfinished business with others is the highest block to an open heart, the biggest block to peace and joy.
The tangled cords that bind us to the past are easy to find. All we need do is become quiet and listen to the voice of our heart. Who do we resent? Who are we angry with? Hurt by? Who are the people we aren’t at peace with? That’s our unfinished business, the unfinished business of the heart.
Look deep inside. Find your secrets. Find your not-quite-finished pieces. Then discover what you need to finish. Often, the answer is only a breath away– a breath of fresh air, a breath of forgiveness, a breath of love. Take that breath. Let the past go. Let it go in peace, thankful for all you’ve learned along the way.
Tie up your loose ends. Heal your connection to others and your heart by finishing unfinished business. Then you’ll be free to move on. And you can go forward in peace.
*****
more language of letting go
Be aware of your intentions
Your inner self is literal and does not understand ambiguity so whenever you direct it to manifest your desires, give it absolutely literal instructions... Your natural self is quite fond of accomplishing the tasks you give it. It loves to display its skills and perform for you and others, and can do nearly anything (within the realm of possibility and probability) that you can conceive.
--Enid Hoffman
Be clear on your intentions.
Intentions are more than mere wishes. An intention is will mixed with emotions and desire. For instance, I can sit here and wish the house were cleaner. When I put all else aside, take my frustration about the mess and channel it into energy and my desire for tidiness, I can say, "I will spend one hour straightening up."
Sometimes we make our intentions known to other people. For instance, we might start dating someone, and it's our intention to eventually marry. Intentions can turn into manipulation when we don't make them clear. They can also involve control, in the worse sense, when they involve changing the free will of someone else.
The best place to start is by making our intentions clear to ourselves. What do you want? In regards to your life situations, like work or finances, what are your intentions?
Sometimes our good intentions can run totally amok. For instance, you might intend to get a person sober, but they may have no desire to sober up. We can avoid a lot of painful manipulations, if we're clear about our intentions.
Watch yourself as you go through life encountering different situations. Do you have an agenda? Do you even know what it is? Sometimes our intentions are less than conscious, hidden right below the surface. For instance, we may have an intention to get married and have someone support us so we don't have to support ourselves. Are someone else's intentions influencing your own?
When you start any project, a new relationship, or just a new day, spend a moment and get quiet. Be clear with yourself and others on what your intentions are. Then surrender those intentions to God.
God, please help me align my intentions and desires with your highest good will for my life.
*****
Fresh and Unfixed
There Is Only Now
It can be easy for us to walk through the world and our lives without really being present. While dwelling on the past and living for the future are common pastimes, it is physically impossible to live anywhere but the present moment. We cannot step out our front door and take a left turn to May of last year, any more than we can take a right turn to December 2015. Nevertheless, we can easily miss the future we are waiting for as it becomes the now we are too busy to pay attention to. We then spend the rest of our time playing “catch up” to the moment that we just let pass by. During moments like these, it is important to remember that there is only Now.
In order to feel more at home in the present moment, it is important to try to stay aware, open, and receptive. Being in the present moment requires our full attention so that we are fully awake to experience it. When we are fully present, our minds do not wander. We are focused on what is going on right now, rather than thinking about what just happened or worrying about what is going to happen next. Being present lets us experience each moment in our lives in a way that cannot be fully lived through memory or fantasy.
When we begin to corral our attention into the present moment, it can be almost overwhelming to be here. There is a state of stillness that has to happen that can take some getting used to, and the mind chatter that so often gets us into our heads and out of the present moment doesn’t have as much to do. We may feel a lack of control because we aren’t busy planning our next move, assessing our current situation, or anticipating the future. Instead, being present requires that we be flexible, creative, attentive, and spontaneous. Each present moment is completely new, and nothing like it has happened or will ever happen again. As you move through your day, remember to stay present in each moment. In doing so, you will live your life without having to wait for the future or yearn for the past. Life happens to us when we happen to life in the Now.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I’ve learned in The Program that I’m wholly powerless over my addiction. At long last, I’ve conceded my powerlessness; as a result, my life has taken a 180-degree turn for the better. However, I do have a power, derived from God, to change my own life. I’ve learned that acceptance does not mean submission to an unpleasant or degrading situation. It means accepting the reality of the situation and then deciding what, if anything, I can and will do about it. Have I stopped trying to control the uncontrollable? Am I gaining the courage to change the things I can?
Today I Pray
I ask my Higher Power for direction as I learn to sort out the things I can change from the things I can’t, for that sorting process does, indeed, require God-given wisdom. May “the things I cannot change” not give me and excuse for inaction. May “the things I can” not include managing other people’s lives. May I start to understand my own reality.
Today I Will Remember
Acceptance is not inaction. Change is not domination.
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One More Day
Most of all, we seek to help them rise to what for most is the supreme challenge of their lives, by developing and enjoying their unique personalities to the fullest.
– Bernie S. Siegel
Just living life, not enjoying it, is a tread-water posture some of us adopt in our lives. Afraid to get “too involved” in living, we wait for the sorts to occur. We look for a guide, a leader, to direct our path to physical and spiritual survival.
At first, we may be devastated when we realize that no one else can direct us, guide us, or lead us out of the maze of emotions that accompanies a chronic illness. Others can help, but only if we lead. Gradually we’re finding a unique strength within us, one we’d not known before, that enables us to direct our physical and spiritual programs with greater confidence.
I am on a continuing journey to accept the challenges of my life. Allowing my unique personality to surface is the beginning.
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Food For Thought
Being Committed
Success comes with commitment. We cannot maintain abstinence, or a marriage, or a profession, or anything else without being committed to it. Genuine commitment is the attitude required of us if we are to benefit from OA. The program is not something we pick up and put down when we feel like it. If abstinence is not the most important thing in our lives, we will not be able to maintain it.
Sharing our commitment out loud, with another person, reinforces it. We need to stay in contact with our OA friends. It is during the busy times that we especially need to remember our priorities. A phone call plugs us in to the group strength, which sustains our individual efforts.
The physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits, which come to us every day as we abstain and work the Twelve Steps, are what nourish us. Being committed to the OA program is our strength and our recovery.
Make firm my commitment to Your way.
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One Day At A Time
TRUTH
"The truth will set you free,
but first it will make you miserable."
James A. Garfield
After years of therapy, I thought I knew myself fairly well. I prided myself on my integrity, honesty and responsible nature; however, my morbid obesity and compulsive overeating reflected the exact opposite of these values. After breaking many resolutions to myself, starting and stopping countless diets, and continuing to have no control over my eating, I began to doubt my integrity. How could I keep a commitment to everyone I knew and yet break my promises to myself over and over again? It wasn't until in a moment of frustrated clarity I blurted out, "I'm acting like an addict!" Finally I experienced my own truth.
I am an addict. I am addicted to food. I use food to fill the gaping black hole within me. I use food to anesthetize my pain. As a compulsive overeater, I stuff my face rather than face my stuff.
Working the Steps allowed me to see that even though I thought I valued honesty, I was constantly lying to myself about my compulsive eating. Becoming abstinent from compulsive eating removed the veils of delusion and dishonesty that I had over my eyes. Living this program, one day at a time, freed me from compulsive lying to myself as well as compulsive eating. Telling the truth, while sometimes very difficult, has let me live happy, joyously, and free.
One day at a time...
I will work the Steps honestly, tell the truth about my life, and be the person of integrity my Higher Power always intended for me to be.
~ Bernadette B.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If we have been thorough about our personal inventory, we have written down a lot. We have listed and analyzed our resentments. We have begun to comprehend their futility and their fatality. We have commenced to see their terrible destructiveness. We have begun to learn tolerance, patience and good will toward all men, even our enemies, for we look on them as sick people. We have listed the people we have hurt by our conduct, and are willing to straighten out the past if we can. - Pg. 70 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Service to another addict/alcoholic or to our group can help calm us when the jitters get rough. Think of one other fellow recoverer who also seemed jittery at the last meeting or maybe didn't show up. You can get in touch with them today and ask if you can help.
God, as I understand You, give me the right words to comfort or to encourage a fellow recoverer.
Detaching With Love
I need to detach with love from those I care about who are still mired in this disease. When I detach with resentment, it is not detachment, it keeps me preoccupied and connected. When I amputate it is not detachment, I get phantom limb, I still hurt and am haunted by something missing. When I detach by ignoring, shoving or running, it is simply the other side of enmeshment and eventually I get hooked in again. Today I will detach with love. I am grateful to have found recovery. I will allow others the dignity of their own path. If I teach, it will be by example.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Stop looking for the differences. People who matter, don't mind; people who mind, don't matter.
No matter my age, race, religion or chemical, I am more alike my fellow addicts than different.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
A signpost, like a peer, only warns you about the road ahead. But a map, like a sponsor can show you how to get where you want to go.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I can wait until all negative and hostile feelings lose their power over me before I say or do anything.
I can take the time to breathe in peace and love, no matter what is going on in my life.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I don't wish to become a member of any club which will have me as a member. - Groucho Marx.
bluidkiti
09-26-2021, 11:30 AM
October 4
Daily Reflections
A NECESSARY PRUNING
. . . . we know that the pains of drinking had to come
before sobriety, and emotional turmoil before serenity.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 94
I love spending time in my garden feeding and pruning my
beautiful flowers. One day, as I was busily snipping away,
a neighbor stopped by. She commented, "Oh! Your plants are
so beautiful, it seems such a shame to cut them back." I
replied, "I know how you feel, but the excess must be
removed so they can grow stronger and healthier." Later I
thought that perhaps my plants feel pain, but God and I
know it's part of the plan and I've seen the results. I
was quickly reminded of my precious A.A. program and how
we all grow through pain. I ask God to prune me when it's
time, so I can grow.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Am I critical of other members of A.A. or of new prospects?
Do I ever say about other members: "I don't think they're
sincere, I think they're bluffing, or I think they're taking
a few drinks on the quiet?" Do I realize that my doubtful
and skeptical attitude is hurting those members, if only in
my attitude toward them, which they cannot help sensing? Do
I say about new prospects: "They'll never make the program,"
or do I say: "They'll only last a few months?" If I take
this attitude, I am unconsciously hurting those
prospects' chances. Is my attitude always constructive and
never destructive?
Meditation For The Day
To be attracted toward God and a better life, you must be
spirit-guided. There is wonderful illumination of thought
given to those who are spirit-guided. To those who are
material-guided, there is nothing in God or a finer life to
appeal to them or to attract them. But to those who are
spirit-guided there is strength and peace and calm to be
found in communion with an Unseen Lord. To those who believe
in this God they cannot see but whose power they can feel,
life has a meaning and purpose. They are children of the
Unseen Lord, and all human beings are their brothers and
sisters.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be spirit-guided.
I pray that I may feel God's presence and power in my life.
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As Bill Sees It
Recovery Through Giving, p.275
For a new prospect, outline the program of action, explaining how
you made a self-appraisal, how you straightened out your past, and
why you are now endeavoring to be helpful to him. It is important
for him to realize that your attempt to pass this on to him plays a
vital part in your own recovery. Actually, he may be helping you
more than you are helping him. Make it plain that he is under no
obligation to you.
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In the first six months of my own sobriety, I worked hard with
many alcoholics. Not a one responded. Yet this work kept me
sober. It wasn't a question of those alcoholics giving me anything.
My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that I
receive.
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.94
2. Grapevine, January 1958
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Walk In Dry Places
Deserving Success
Achievements
It's said that alcoholics sometimes snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
Some of us, deep down inside, don't really think we deserve success. We
might be discouraged by feelings of guilt or low self-esteem, or perhaps
we don't want to become targets of envy or competitive attacks.
We need to practice acceptance of our current situation, always believing
that we do have a right to achievements that match our talents and experience,
indeed, such achievements may only be possible now that we're sober and
thinking rightly.
Some people think that our occupations and our program are separate matters.
But the very last idea in the 12 Steps is to practice our principles "in all our affairs."
If we take the view that any useful work is a form of service, we'll find opportunities
to be beneficial to everyone. With that attitude, we will also realize that we deserve success.
I ‘ll know today that I have a right to do well in any legitimate activity for which I am qualified.
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Keep It Simple
Your three best doctors are faith, time, and patience.---From a fortune cookie
Only a short time ago, we were very sick. Getting sober made us so much better.
At first, when we stopped drinking and using other drugs, we thought we were fixed.
Then we began to see that we were not all that well.
No doctor can fix us. To get well, we need to keep living by the Twelve Steps and
the slogans of our program. We need to keep on trusting that our Higher Power
will heal us. One Day at a Time, day after day, we get stronger and happier.
And it never has to stop. Each day, we know ourselves a little better.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You are my best doctor. Help me remember that.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll do what the “doctor” suggests. I will talk with
my sponsor about Step Ten today.
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Each Day a New Beginning
If I love with my Spirit, I don't have to think so hard with my head. ~ Peggy Cahn
Love smooths all ruffles. All situations are calmed all tension is eased. The expression of love is a balm on all wounds, particularly our own. Feeling love toward the people in our lives today will boost our spirits; our personal difficulties will lessen. We'll discover resolution. The answers we've been searching for become known to us when we concentrate less on our problems and more on the gift of love we can give to the travelers we encounter today.
The solutions to our problems are seldom found in our heads. They burst forth from our hearts. We suddenly seem to know what to do. Perhaps someone else's words or behavior will trigger the inspiration we've longed for. We can let our concern today be on the moment and the experience. We can let its power wash over us, and in the wake we'll find the answers we search for.
When we're brittle, cold to others, we close off whatever messages are being directed to us. Our love for others softens us; making it possible for the words and ideas we await to permeate us.
If I am in need today, if I have a problem that wants a solution, I will reach out to others with love. They'll hand me my answer in return.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, “I don’t miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time.” As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn’t happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
pp. 151-152
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Today, I reside among the living, no better, no worse than any of God's other children. Today I look in the mirror when putting on my make up and smile, rather than shy away from looking myself in the eye. Today I fit in my skin. I am at peace with myself and the world around me.
p. 318
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
Then it is explained that other Steps of the A.A. program can be practiced with success only when Step Three is given a determined and persistent trial. This statement may surprise newcomers who have experienced nothing but constant deflation and a growing conviction that human will is of no value whatever. They have become persuaded, and rightly so, that many problems besides alcohol will not yield to a headlong assault powered by the individual alone. But now it appears that there are certain things which only the individual can do. All by himself, and in the light of his own circumstances, he needs to develop the quality of willingness. When he acquires willingness, he is the only one who can make the decision to exert himself. Trying to do this is an act of his own will. All of the Twelve Steps require sustained and personal exertion to conform to their principles and so, we trust, to God's will.
p. 40
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Yesterday is history, tomorrow, but a mystery...
Today is a gift, that's why we call it the present.
Like an ability or a muscle, hearing your inner wisdom is strengthened by doing it.
--Robbie Gass
"If the eyes are looked upon as the windows to the soul...
then a smile must be the doorway the heart."
--unknown
"Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf."
--American Indian Proverb
When someone intentionally hurts me, I know, they are also hurting themselves, probably
more. Let go, and love them anyway.
--Shelley
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LIFE
"I am not afraid of tomorrow,
for I have seen yesterday and I
love today."
-- William Allen White
Today I have confidence in my life and I am experiencing consistency in my behavior and
attitude. In recovery, things follow a natural progression and life is more like a series of
curves than sharp peaks. As an addict, my life was forever going up and down, ecstasy
followed by gloom; the "best ever" followed by depression; always black and white --- no
grays.
Today I have some balance and consistency. Things are connected and grow in the
process of change. Sudden happenings and quick changes scare me because they are
symptomatic of yesterday's disease and are not consistent with the spiritual life I seek.
Today I have the peace of knowing that tomorrow will be something like today --- and I
am happy.
Thank You for the spiritual gift of consistency.
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Give thanks to the Lord for He is good; His love endures forever.
Psalm 106:1
Give ear to my words, O LORD, consider my sighing. Listen to my cry for help,
my King and my God, for to you I pray. In the morning, O LORD, you hear my
voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation. Psalm 5:1-3
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Daily Inspiration
When you lose your temper, you lose. Lord, help me to be patient with those around me,
but most of all, help me be patient with myself.
Apply God's promises to your daily lives and speak to Him from the depths of your heart.
Lord, the more time I spend with You, the stronger You make my faith and the more blessings
You place in my life.
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NA Just For Today
Page 290
"When we first begin to enjoy relief from our addiction, we run the risk of assuming control of our lives again. We forget the agony and pain that we have known."
Basic Text, p.50
Many of us have been "thirty-day wonders." We were desperate and dying when we showed up at our first NA meeting. We identified with the addicts we met there and the message they shared. With their support, we were finally able to stop using and catch a free breath. For the first time in a long, long time, we felt at home. Overnight, our lives were transformed; we walked, talked, ate, drank, slept, and dreamed Narcotics Anonymous.
Then, Narcotics Anonymous lost its novelty. Meetings that had been a thrill became monotonous. Our wonderful NA friends became bores; their uplifting NA talk, drivel. When our former friends called, inviting us back for some of the old fun, we kissed our recovery goodbye.
Sooner or later, we made our way back to the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. Nothing had changed out there, we'd discovered-not us, not our friends, not the drugs, not anything. If anything, it had gotten worse than ever. True, NA meetings may not be a laugh riot, and our NA friends may not be spiritual giants. But there's a power in the meetings, a common bond among the members, a life to the program that we cant do without. Today, our recovery is more than just a fad-it's a way of life. We're going to practice living our program like our lives depend on it, because they do.
Just for Today: I'm no "thirty-day wonder" The NA way is my way of life, and I'm here for the duration.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The reason why birds can fly and we can't is simply that they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. --James M. Barrie
As children, we are taught to act and think with confidence. If we have faith that something wonderful can happen, it will bring us joy. Confidence gives us the will to succeed. Without faith, we invite despair. Faith lets us win by teaming us with love and hope. When things are going well, faith encourages growth. During hard times, faith falls upon trust for added strength and inspiration. It takes such a small amount of material things to have faith. Once, a four-year-old girl found a penny and showed it proudly to a stranger. The man scoffed, "What do you expect to buy with a penny?" The child with faith replied, "I can buy a wonderful wish at a wishing well with it."
What can I have faith in today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Anxiety is that range of distress, which attends willing what cannot be willed. --Leslie H. Farber
There are hundreds of ways in which men try to will things that cannot be willed. We will to sleep; we will to have others like us; we will to have sexual virility. In all these things, the force of our will does not work because what we want is not controllable. They come to us as an outcome of many factors - when the situation is right - when we have become ready for them.
When we could not let go, when we did not know how to turn our life and our will over to the care of God, we became more and more anxious. Then we turned to our addictive or codependent escapes from anxiety and willfulness. It is the folly of our age to try to take charge of everything. We are following a more peaceful and more successful way. We are doing our part and receiving the benefits that come to us.
The will of my Higher Power has a loving purpose and is far wiser than I.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
If I love with my Spirit, I don't have to think so hard with my head. --Peggy Cahn
Love smoothes all ruffles. All situations are calmed, all tension is eased. The expression of love is a balm on all wounds, particularly our own. Feeling love toward the people in our lives today will boost our spirits; our personal difficulties will lessen. We'll discover resolution. The answers we've been searching for become known to us when we concentrate less on our problems and more on the gift of love we can give to the travelers we encounter today.
The solutions to our problems are seldom found in our heads. They burst forth from our hearts. We suddenly seem to know what to do. Perhaps someone else's words or behavior will trigger the inspiration we've longed for. We can let our concern today be on the moment and the experience. We can let its power wash over us, and in the wake we'll find the answers we search for.
When we're brittle, cold to others, we close off whatever messages are being directed to us. Our love for others softens us; making it possible for the words and ideas we await to permeate us.
If I am in need today, if I have a problem that wants a solution, I will reach out to others with love. They'll hand me my answer in return.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Faith and Money
Sometimes, there is not enough money to make ends meet, much less afford any luxuries.
People may tell us to do a budget, and we chuckle. The expenses we need to pay for survival surpass the income.
We look at the situation; shake our heads, and say, "No way."
Many of us have had to live through these situations. This is not the time to panic; this is not the time to despair.
Panic and desperation will lead to bad judgment and desperate moves. This is the time to substitute faith for fear. This is the time to trust God to meet our needs.
Take life one day and one need at a time. Use your survival skills positively. Know your possibilities are not limited by the past or by your present circumstances.
Examine any blocks that might be stopping the flow of money in your life. Do you have an attitude, an issue, a lesson that might be yours to change or learn?
Maybe the lesson is a simple one of faith. In Biblical times, it is said that Jesus walked on the water. It is said His followers could, too, but the moment they let fear take over, they sank.
During financial hard times, we can learn to "walk on water" with money issues. If we make out a budget, and there's not enough money to survive and pay legitimate expenses, do your best, then let go. Trust your Source to supply your needs. If an emergency arises, and there is no cash to meet the need, look beyond your wallet. Look to your Source. Claim a Divine supply, an unlimited supply, for all that you need.
Do your part. Strive for an attitude of financial responsibility in thought and action. Ask for Divine Wisdom. Listen to God's leadings. Then let go of your fears and your need to control.
We know that money is a necessary part of being alive and living; so does our Higher Power.
God, bring any blocks and barriers within me concerning money to the surface. Help me take care of myself financially. If money is tight, I will dispel fear and learn to "walk on water" concerning finance issues. I will not use this attitude to justify irresponsibility. I will do my part, including letting go of fear and trusting you to do the rest.
Today I can wait until all negative and hostile feelings lose their power over me before I say or do anything. I can take the time to breathe in peace and love, no matter what is going on in my life. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 4
Let the Miracle of Acceptance Find You
I found this miracle in a small church in New Mexico. The Sanctuario do Chimayo is famous for its healing powers and miracles. The ground under the church, some say, is particularly holy and powerful. Crutches– evidence of the healing miracles people experienced there– line the walls of the church’s back room.
Four years ago, a friend had sent me to the Sanctuario to find my miracle. It was three months after my son died. I didn’t know what miracle could possibly fix my situation. Now, sitting in the back of the chapel, I knew. I didn’t have any crutches to hang on the wall, but the miracle of acceptance had healed my heart and changed my life.
We may search for miracles that change our situation so we don’t have to deal with the loss or feel the pain. Sometimes we get that miracle. Our circumstances change. But sometimes the miracle we get changes us. If the situation is too difficult, the loss to painful to accept in one leap, take smaller steps. Accept what you’re feeling today. Accept who you are today. Accept what you think today.
Look for your miracles. Hope for the best. But when you can’t change what you’re going through, let the simple, quiet, daily miracle of acceptance find you.
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more language of letting go
Value your dreams
I always wanted to be a writer. Long ago I talked to God about it, then asked God to bring it to pass if that dream was from Him. Or Her. Within twenty-four hours, I had my first writing assignment from a community newspaper. I got paid five dollars a story, and I've been writing ever since.
Sometimes, we get a vision of ourselves doing something. We might get an inkling or even have a dream where we see ourselves doing something in the future. We might get a feeling that we're about to become pregnant. Or we might have a dream in which we see ourselves moving into a new home. We might be driving by a neighborhood one day and get a special feeling that it would be right for us to live there.
We might get a hunch about a career-oriented event.
Some people think these little hunches or dreams are our soul's way of remembering what it came here to do.
We see a flash: a dream, vision, or special feeling of what's coming next. Maybe your dreams about what you want and what you'd like are more important than you think.
God, show me what you want me to do and experience in life. Then give me enough consciousness to relax and see what you're pointing out.
Activity: Have an I see page in your journal. As you go about the days ahead, pay special attention to the dreams that pop into your head. Nighttime dreams are important. It's good to write in your journal about those,too. Often they give us clues. But what I'm talking about here are our daytime dreams and feelings-- those things we think we want or can see ourselves doing. Have you buried any dreams from childhood or adulthood, things you really wanted to pursue but forgot along the way? Tell yourself it's time to remember. Then let it go. Pay attention to what pops up into sight. Write it down, even if it's just a sentence or two. Then let the dream go again. Don't try to control the future. It will happen of its own accord.
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Culling Out the Weeds
Mind Over Matter
The power of the mind is a curious thing, because it is so powerful yet so difficult to control sometimes.
The power of the mind is a curious thing, because it is so powerful yet so difficult to control sometimes. We find ourselves thinking a certain way, knowing that this thought may be creating trouble for us yet we find it difficult to stop. For example, many people have the experience of getting sick at the same time every year or every time they go on a plane. They may even be aware that their beliefs impact their experiences, so continue to think they will get sick and then they do.
Sometimes we need to get sick in order to process something or move something through our bodies. But often we get sick, or feel exhausted, because we don’t make the effort to galvanize the power of our minds in the service of our physical health, which is one of its most important functions. We really can use it to communicate to our bodies, yet we often regard the two as separate entities that have little to do with one another.
Knowing this, we have the power to create physical health and mental health, simply by paying attention to the tapes running in our minds. Once we hear ourselves, we have the option to let that tape keep running or to make a new recording. We harness the power of the mind in our defense when we choose supportive, healing words that foster good health and high spirits. All we need to do is remember to tend the field of our mind with the attentive and loving hand of a master gardener tending her flower beds, culling out the weeds so that the blossoms may come to fruition.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We are powerless over our addictions; that admission brought us to The Program, where we learn through unconditional surrender that there is victory in defeat. After a time, we learn in Twelfth Step work that we’re not only powerless over our own addiction, but over the addictions of others. We cannot will another person to sobriety, for example, any more than we can hold back the sunset. We may minister to another person’s physical needs; we may share with him, pray with him, and take him to meetings. But we cannot get inside his head and push some sort of magic button that will make him — or her — take the all-important First Step. Do I still sometimes try to play God?
Today I Pray
may I understand my all-too-human need to be the boss, have the upper hand, be the final authority — even in the humbling business of my own addiction. May I see how easy it would be to become a big-shot Twelfth Stepper. May I also see that, no matter how much I care and want to help, I have no control over another’s addiction — any more than someone else has control over mine.
Today I Will Remember
I cannot engineer another’s sobriety.
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One More Day
The bitter and the sweet come from the outside, the hard from within, from one’s own efforts.
– Albert Einstein
Too often we expect to have lives in which only happy events occur and no one is ever hurt. Instead of tears and sadness, we expect only happiness. In doing this, we do not face life realistically. By ignoring all the problems around us — our own and others’ as well — we skim the surface of life.
When we face reality, we begin our real journey. A life well lived is not one of constant happiness and joy. More often, it is the life as lived by someone who has known intense pain and extreme disappointment. Our negative experiences give us that opportunity to be strengthened within.
All my experiences give me a chance to grow.
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Food For Thought
Friendship
Through this program, we learn that we have choices. Not only can we choose what we will eat and what we will do, but also we can choose our friends. As we become honest, unaddicted people, we are able to relate to each other on a level of mutuality and admiration rather than out of dependency and fear. We gain the self-confidence to choose those with whom we enjoy spending time and sharing, rather than slavishly catering to anyone who will notice us.
Friends in OA have a special bond, since we share a common problem and a common solution. By putting principles before personalities, we avoid dependency and childish demands. Though we love and support each other, we do not cling together, since we are each dependent on a Higher Power. Our friends give us the gift of themselves, which shows us who we are.
Thank You for friendship.
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One Day At A Time
SHAME
”It is not the criminal things that are hardest to confess,
but the ridiculous and the shameful.”
Jean Jacques Rousseau
I had a very strange childhood filled with lots of emotional and physical neglect. Combine that with moving about once a year and being deemed as "unacceptable" by each new community we moved into, and how could I help but feel a great sense of shame about everything about me?
As an adult I left home and became a well-respected part of a new community. I have lived in the same nice house, with a beautiful yard, and had well kept-children. In spite of all the evidence to the contrary, internally I was still that "unacceptable" child. I had not told anyone about my childhood because I felt it to be a shameful secret. I thought that much of my adult unhappiness was deserved because I truly believed that even though no one knew the truth about me, deep down I really was still unacceptable.
Since coming to TRG, I have been releasing something far more important than the 60 pounds of weight I have lost. I have begun to release the shame, the sense of being unacceptable, and the sense of being unworthy and unlovable. I have shared my secrets with wonderfully-loving, accepting people. By sharing my secrets I am releasing my pain. My request that my name not be revealed at the end of this meditation, though, clearly states that I still have work to do. TRG, the program, and the steps are offering me the means to recovery and I will gratefully accept the offer!
One day at a time...
I will remember that the old false self-perceptions are no longer relevant in my life. I am learning new ways of self-acceptance and new ways of self-nurturing that will serve me far better.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. We know there are difficult wives and families, but the man who is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much to make them so. - Pg. 127 - The Family Afterward
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
At times, while traveling this road, we find it easier to just agree with everyone now, and do our own thing later. It's called 'just talking the talk.' This means we are not serious about our new life and can quickly travel to our next high. We tell these people that a belly full of booze and head full of program is a miserable way to live.
Let the next thing I say be straight from my heart and not just something I think the person in front of me wants to hear.
Guilt
I will tolerate the pain of watching. When I see someone I care about locked in this disease, I want to run and help. I want to tell them what to do to get better. But time and again, this hasn't worked. In fact, it usually blows up in my face. My only job is to stay on my own path. I cannot help anyone who doesn't want my help. If someone wants what I have they will also want to find it in their own way. I cannot really teach anyone anything I think. I cannot really save anyone. Especially those close to me. My feelings of disgust at their blindness and frustration with their seeming unwillingness to get with the program color my message. And so often, I help because I feel so much survivor's guilt. What I really want to do is run the other way but I feel too guilty to do that. What I really want is the family I lost to this disease or the family I never had but that is gone. Today, I will allow myself to have what I have, to live well, to follow my own path of recovery.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
It's easy to see the difference between ourselves and assholes, unless, at the moment, we're the asshole.
I have got to get out of my own way.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Today, take care of yourself. Tomorrow you can worry about them.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am developing a world of peace for myself, both inside and out.
Today I know I am always only one breath away from peace, one prayer away from serenity.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I looked around the room and I could not figure out what it was that you had which was so hot I should be willing to go to any lengths to get. Some of you had nice jewelry - and if your rings were loose and you held my hand during the Lord's Prayer.. they were mine. - Patti O
bluidkiti
09-26-2021, 11:31 AM
October 5
Daily Reflections
YESTERDAY'S BAGGAGE
For the wise have always known that no one can make much of his life until self-searching
becomes a regular habit, until he is able to admit and accept what he finds, and until he
patiently and persistently tries to correct what is wrong.
12 & 12, p. 88
I have more than enough to handle today, without dragging along yesterday's baggage
too. I must balance today's books, if I am to have a chance tomorrow. So I ask myself if
I have erred and how I can avoid repeating that particular behavior. Did I hurt anyone,
did I help anyone, and why? Some of today is bound to spill over into tomorrow, but most
of it need not if I make an honest daily inventory.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Do I have any hard feelings about other group members or for any
other A.A. group? Am I critical of the way a group member thinks or acts? Do I feel that
another group is operating in the wrong way and do I broadcast it? Or do I realize that all
A.A. members, no matter what their limitations, have something to offer, some good,
however little, that they can do for A.A. in spite of their handicaps? Do I believe that
there is a place for all kinds of groups in A.A., provided they are following A.A. traditions,
and that they can be effective even if I do not agree with their procedure? Am I tolerant
of people and groups?
Meditation For The Day
"The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in, from this
time forth and even forever more." All your movements, your goings and comings can be
guided by the Unseen Spirit. Every visit to help another, every unselfish effort to assist,
can be blessed by that Unseen Spirit. There can be a blessing on all you do, on every
interview with one who is suffering. Every meeting of a need may not be a chance
meeting, but it may have been planned by the Unseen Spirit. Led by the Spirit of the
Lord, you can be tolerant, sympathetic, and understanding of others and so accomplish
much.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be led by the spirit of God. I pray that the Lord will
preserve my goings and my comings.
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As Bill Sees It
A Higher Power for Atheists, p.276
"I have had many experiences with atheists, mostly good.
Everybody in A.A. has the right to his own opinion. It is much better
to maintain an open and tolerant society than it is to suppress any
small disturbances their opinions might occasion. Actually, I don't
know of anybody who went off and died of alcoholism because of
some atheist's opinions on the cosmos.
"But I do always entreat these folks to look to a 'Higher
Power'--namely, their own group. When they come in, most of
their A.A. group is sober, and they are drunk. Therefore, the
group is a 'Higher Power.' That's a good enough start, and most
of them do progress from there. I know how they feel, because I
was once that way myself."
Letter, 1962
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Walk In Dry Places
What can Sobriety Bring?
Living Sober
The single goal of staying sober is so all-important in AA that side benefits
are often overlooked. There is even a tendency to warn members about the
hazards of attaching importance to anything except sobriety.
But we do have to become responsible people in all things, not just sober people.
We can expect real sobriety to bring the confidence and well-being we expected
from the bottle, but never received.
Sobriety is not likely to give us the equivalent of the euphoria we got from drinking,
but a great sense of well-being based on realistic expectations is more satisfying
than the ridiculous mental states we sought in drinking. Living the right kind of
life will bring its own rewards.
.Alone with staying sober today, I'll meet all my responsibilities to my family and
friends. Sobriety does not promise miracles, but it does bring a good life.
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Keep It Simple
It is often easier to fight for one’s principles than to live up to them---Adlai Stevenson
It easy to talk about our values. But when the clerk at the store gives extra change
by mistake, those values get put to the test. It feels good to read about spirituality
in a comfortable chair at home. But when we get stuck in a traffic jam, it’s hard to
live by our values.
That’s why practicing our program daily helps. Practice prepares us for the tough times.
Maybe we’ll feel like drinking or using other drugs once a year. Maybe we’ll only
get the wrong amount of change once a year. But if we live our values daily, we’ll be
ready when the hard times come. Remember: “It’s not enough to talk the talk. You
have to walk the walk.”
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me live this program each day. Help me
“walk the walk.”
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll do a Step Ten, Taking an inventory tells me if I’m
living up to my values.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Sometimes I think I'm the luckiest person in the world. There's nothing better than
having work you really care about. Sometimes I think my greatest problem is lack
of confidence. I'm scared, and I think that's healthy. --Jane Fonda
We each vacillate between feeling confident on some days, lucky on others, and
yet frequently scared on others. It's very human to vacillate. We need not be anxious
because our emotions refuse to stand still.
Changing emotions are part of the process of normal living. And changing emotions
reflect an involvement with the moment. Situations do touch us, as they should.
They do invite responses, as they should. And our responses will reveal our emotional
involvement, as they should. We can cherish the variety of our emotions. They enrich us.
But they may also create problems, if they go unchecked.
We need to maintain a balance. Confidence, certainly desirable, can become overconfidence
and thus complacency. Confidence needs humility to temper it. Fear makes us cautious,
and that's good; but too much can immobilize us. Being in charge of our emotions makes
them work for us.
Emotions can energize me and keep me involved with the moment. They can also control
me. It's my decision to be in charge.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
We have shown how we got out from under. You say, “Yes, I’m willing. But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?”
p. 152
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
My Chance To Live
A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.
Growing up in A.A., I have been blessed with children who have never seen their mother drunk. I have a husband who loves me simply because I am, and I have gained the respect of my family. What more could a broken-down drunk ask for? Lord knows it is more than I ever thought possible, and ever so much more than I deserved. All because I am willing to believe A.A. just might work for me too.
p. 318
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Three - "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
Once we have come into agreement with these ideas, it is really easy to begin the practice of Step Three. In all times of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done."
pp. 40-41
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Give and forget. Receive and remember.
When you give of yourself, you receive more than you give.
--Antoine De Saint-Exupery
Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul.
--Henry David Thoreau
Prosperity depends more on wanting what you have than having what you want.
--Geoffry F. Abert
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It
turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a
feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past,
brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."
--Melody Beattie
"The more you recognize and express gratitude for the things you have, the more things
you will have to express gratitude for."
--Zig Ziglar
When a person habitually thinks optimistically and hopefully, they activate life around
them positively and thereby attract positive results. Positive Thinking sets in motion
positive and creative forces and success flows toward you!
--Norman Vincent Peale
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PRIDE
"The books I haven't written are
better than the books other
people have."
-- Cyril V. Connolly
Today I still have to grapple with pride, vanity and conceit. Today, thanks to God and my
spiritual program, I am not so preoccupied with self, but the old tapes can still be heard:
"Thank God I am not as stupid as her." "I am blessed in not being like those people." "I
suppose everybody in the room is looking at me."
Pride is still a big obstacle because it keeps me isolated from people. It emphasizes the
difference between me and the world, rather than the commonality. Pride keeps me a
prisoner of my ego and develops that cruel and sadistic streak in my nature that I know
exists. Pride stops me being grateful because it keeps me too focused on what I am doing
and I miss the beauty and splendor of my life. Pride keeps my nose pushed against
the picture so I cannot see the portrait!
I can only change this "proudful" attitude by talking about it. The way for me to grow is
to "dump it" . . . today.
May I find me in the people I meet and share with.
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"I will establish my covenant between me and you, and your offspring after you
throughout their generations, for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and to your
offspring after you."
Genesis 17:7
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to
all. The Lord is near.
Philippians 4:4-5
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the
secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether
living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
Philippians 4:12-13
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Daily Inspiration
God will give you today, no more than you can handle today. It is when you choose to add
yesterday's and tomorrow's troubles to it that it becomes too much to carry. Lord, help
me remember that it is only right now that I can find all that I am looking for.
Take time to learn from the mistakes of others. We don't have time to make all of them
ourselves. Lord, guide me onto paths that lead me to You.
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NA Just For Today
Ask for mercy, not justice
Page 291
"Many of us have difficulty admitting that we caused harm for others... We cut away our justifications and our ideas of being a victim."
Basic Text, p.38
Our lives are progressing nicely. Things are going good, and each year in recovery brings more material and spiritual gifts. We may have a little money in the bank, a new car, or a committed relationship. We have a little self-confidence, and our faith in a Higher Power is growing.
Then, something happens. Someone breaks into our new car and steals the stereo, or the person we're in the relationship with becomes unfaithful. Right away, we feel victimized. "Where's the justice?" we wail. But if we take a look back on our own behavior, we may find that we've been guilty of what's just been done to us. We realize we wouldn't really want justice-not for ourselves, and not for others. What we want is mercy.
We thank a loving God for the compassion we've been shown, and we take the time to appreciate all the precious gifts that recovery brings.
Just for Today: I will pray for mercy, not justice. I am grateful for the compassion I've been shown, and will offer mercy to others.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I think of the trees and how simply they let go, let fall the riches of a season, how without grief (it seems) they can let go and go deep into their roots for renewal and sleep. --May Sarton
"How can I do what you say," asked the child, "and still be me?"
"Look at me," said the tree. "I bend in the wind, droop in the rain. Yet I always remain myself, a tree."
"Look at me," said the man. "I can't change."
"Look at me," said the tree. "I change every season from green to brown to green again, from bud to flower to fallen leaf. Yet I always remain myself, a tree."
"I can't love anymore," said the woman. "With my love, I have given away all that I am."
"Look at me," said the tree. "There are robins in my branches, owls in my trunk, moss and ladybugs living on my bark. They may take what I have, but not what I am."
Whether we know it or not, we are like the tree. Only our pride hangs on to a false sense of self, wanting to keep everything, refusing to follow advice or orders. What we do doesn't matter; how we do it is what counts.
What changes have I gone through without losing my real self?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Men are doomed to live in an overwhelmingly tragic and demonic world. --Ernest Becker
Life is difficult. We never reach the point where our path is free of obstacles and hardships. And regardless of how much we grow, how faithful we are to our program, nothing changes the fact that death is still there for us. As painful and hard as it is, life also is deeply meaningful and worthwhile when we submit to its reality and live in a spiritual way.
After we stop living in denial and accept the hard facts about life, we see that we need each other. We need relationships to stay sane. We need to pull together and support one another the way people do in difficult times. Rugged individualism isn't always good for real people in the real world. We need relationships so we can celebrate and make music and encourage one another. We need relationships so we can laugh and make jokes and tell our personal stories. And we need to stand together to oppose the destructive forces around us.
God help me learn to have relationships with my brothers and sisters.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Sometimes I think I'm the luckiest person in the world. There's nothing better than having work you really care about. Sometimes I think my greatest problem is lack of confidence. I'm scared, and I think that's healthy. --Jane Fonda
We each vacillate between feeling confident on some days, lucky on others, and yet frequently scared on others. It's very human to vacillate. We need not be anxious because our emotions refuse to stand still.
Changing emotions are part of the process of normal living. And changing emotions reflect an involvement with the moment. Situations do touch us, as they should. They do invite responses, as they should. And our responses will reveal our emotional involvement, as they should. We can cherish the variety of our emotions. They enrich us. But they may also create problems, if they go unchecked.
We need to maintain a balance. Confidence, certainly desirable, can become overconfidence and thus complacency. Confidence needs humility to temper it. Fear makes us cautious, and that's good; but too much can immobilize us. Being in charge of our emotions makes them work for us.
Emotions can energize me and keep me involved with the moment. They can also control me. It's my decision to be in charge.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Knowledge
Learn to let yourself be guided into truth.
We will know what we need to know, when we need to know that. We don't have to feel badly about taking our own time to reach our insights. We don't have to force insight or awareness before it's time.
Yes! Maybe the whole world saw a particular truth in our life, and we denied it - until we were ready to deal with it. That is our business, and our right! Our process is our own, and we will discover our truths at the right time, when we are ready, when the learning experience is complete.
The most growth-producing concept we can develop for others and ourselves is to allow ourselves to have our own process. We can give and receive support and encouragement while we go through this process. We can listen to others and say what we think. We can set boundaries and take care of ourselves, when needed. But we still give others and ourselves the right to grow at our own pace, without judgment, and with much trust that all is well and is on schedule.
When we are ready, when the time is right, and when our Higher Power is ready - we will know what we need to know.
Today, I will let myself and others have our own pace and time schedule for growth and change. I will trust that I will be empowered with insights and the tools for dealing with these insights, at the right time.
Today I will be aware not to judge myself when I feel less than perfect. I am beginning to love myself just as I am and that feels so nice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 5
Spiritual Growth Can Be Easier Now
For so long, you thought that spiritual growth, healing, life had to be hard. And it was– for many reasons.
That’s no longer the case. Do you see the rose struggling and straining to grow? Do you see a tree pushing and forcing its growth? Your growth can unfold as naturally, as inevitably, as beautifully as the tender shoots of a rose break through first with green, then a bud, then a fully opened flower. You have committed to life, you have committed to growth, you have committed to opening your heart and taking the journey. That is enough.
The rest will be revealed to you in time. The answers will become clear. The visions, the guidance, the leadings you are seeking will come. All you need to guide you through life will come– quiet spiritual awakenings, quiet revelations that profoundly change your life. Each awakening will take you to the next place. Each will lead you home.
Don’t worry about what you have to do to achieve spiritual growth. Let yourself be. The growth will happen, and it will happen naturally and easily.
*****
more language of letting go
Take time to see it first
"Go over your skydive in your mind," my jump master taught me, when I first began learning to jump out of the plane. "Sit down by yourself and see yourself going through every movement from the time you get into the plane until you come back to earth."
Visualization has been a helpful tool to me in skydiving and in most areas of my life.
In the 1980s, Shakti Gawain wrote a best-seller, Creative Visualization. She talked about the powerful impact of using your mind to imagine yourself in some activity before actually doing it in reality.
Visualization has been a self-help tool that's been around even longer than that. Many people in all walks of life, from therapists to sports professionals, agree that seeing yourself doing it beforehand is the best way to do it well.
We can use the tool of visualization to help create matter out of spiritual energy, simply by spending quiet time during our meditation focusing on what we want, seeing ourselves having it, doing it, touching it, and feeling it. One woman told me she used visualization to help see herself letting go of a partner.
"I get quiet and I actually see myself living happily without the person I thought I had to have in my life," she said to me. "I get into the details of myself,too. How unencumbered I feel. How grateful I am for the lessons that person taught me. How I'm free of the burden of obsessing about this person. It really helps me let go."
Visualization is an important tool. It's a gift when we can see ourselves doing something and then having that activity manifested in reality.
Visualization only works if you use it. Make it a regular practice in your life.
Visualize yourself living with one of your dreams. Visualize yourself doing something you're nervous about doing. Take a few moments and run through the entire scenario in your head, until you can see yourself doing that thing calmly, clearly, and successfully with all obstacles cleared from your path.
God, help me use visualization as a regular tool in my life. Help me do my part in creating positive situations by taking the time first to see it, to visualize it.
Activity: Become an expert at visualization. Go to the library or bookstore and get a couple books on visualization. Then, read these books and begin applying the tool of visualization in your life.
*****
Habitual Anger
Unblocking the Ally by Madisyn Taylor
Anger can easily become our go-to emotion; to remedy, start noticing when and why you get angry.
Sometimes when we feel anger, it is coming from a deep place that demands acknowledgment and expression. At these times, it is important that we find healthy ways to honor our anger, remembering how dangerous it is to repress it. However, anger can also become a habit, our go-to emotion whenever things go wrong. Often this is because, for whatever reason, we feel more comfortable expressing anger than we do other emotions, like sadness. It can also be that getting angry gives us the impression that we’ve done something about our problem. In these cases, our habitual anger is inhibiting both our ability to express our other emotions and to take action in our lives.
If it’s true that anger is functioning this way in your life, the first thing you might want to try is to notice when you get angry. You might begin to see a pattern of some kind. For example, you could notice that it is always your first response or that it comes up a lot in one particular situation. If the pattern doesn’t become clear right away, you could try keeping a journal about when you get angry and see if you can find any underlying meaning. The good thing about keeping a journal is that you can explore your anger more deeply in it—from examining who in your family of origin expressed a lot of anger to how you feel when you encounter anger in others. This kind of awareness can be a formidable agent of transformation.
Anger can be a powerful ally, since it is filled with energy that we can harness and use to create change in the world. It is one of the most cathartic emotions, and it can also be a very effective cleanser of the emotional system. However, when it becomes a habit, it actually loses its power to transform and becomes an obstacle to growth. Identifying the role anger plays in your life and restoring it to its proper function can bring new energy and expansiveness to your emotional life.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Soon after I came to The Program, I found a Higher Power whom I choose to call God. I’ve come to believe that He has all power; if I stay close to Him and do His work well, He provides me not with what I think I want, but with what I need. Gradually, I’m becoming less interested in myself and my little schemes; at the same time, I’m becoming more interested in seeing what I can contribute to others and to life. As I become more conscious of God’s presence, am I beginning to lose my self-centered fears?
Today I Pray
May I see that the single most evident change in myself — beyond my own inner sense of peace — is that I have come out from behind my phony castle walls, dropped the drawbridge that leads into my real village and crossed it. I am back among people again, interested in them, caring what happens to them. May I find my joy here in this peopled reality, now that I have left behind those old self protective fears and illusions of my own uniqueness.
Today I Will Remember
What is life without people?
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One More Day
Be patient with everyone, but above all with yourself.
– St. Francis de Sales
Life fine cheese, we wait, as we grow older, to ripen properly. We would like to hurry the process along, but haste won’t serve us well in the long run. We have learned to let others take their time to mature and to become responsible adults, but often when it comes to ourselves, we are quick to anger at our own mistakes. We frequently are not as forgiving of ourselves as we are of others.
Maturity arrives when we understand that some of the goals we thought were crucial are really unattainable, and that it really doesn’t matter. Maturity is a frame of mind where we learn to be pleased with what we can accomplish. We can find contentment in just living our days as best we can.
I recognize there is no magic moment when I will become a fully mature adult. Maturity is an attitude that conveys peace with myself.
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Food For Thought
Being Before Doing
What we are comes before what we do. In order to produce good fruit, the tree has to be a good tree. If we are not whole, integrated, and in touch with our Higher Power, and ourselves the actions that we take will not be satisfying.
For us compulsive overeaters, being abstinent is more important than anything we do. When we are abstinent, all things are possible. We still have to make choices, deal with frustration and conflict, and accept some defeats, but we are coping with reality rather than escaping.
The best things that we do are those, which our Higher Power does through us. Our role is to be ready and available, a sharpened tool which He may use. Often we do not see the ultimate results of our actions. We trust that what we do will be acceptable and according to His will.
May I be what You intend.
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One Day At A Time
HABITS
”A habit cannot be tossed out the window;
it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.”
Mark Twain
How grateful I was when I read that quote – even though I had to translate it a bit. It has always been difficult for me to start good habits. I've heard all kinds of things about that – that it takes 21 days, 40 days, or an x-number of weeks to start a habit. It always made me feel bad and different because I swear for me, it probably takes at least two years. Until then I’d be biting my nails, knowing that even if I did practice good habits, they might disappear at any time. It was supposed to be so much faster, so much easier! A few weeks of eating healthy, and magically I would be cured! Well, that never happened.
Now I can look at good habits – like eating healthy, exercising, meditating, paying my bills on time – as tender, shy little animals that need a long time before they can be coaxed up the stairs of my life. They need patience, a lot of quiet time, and a willingness to be understood and studied. How do I feed, nurture and care for this habit?
I cannot do it alone. I do not have the patience, the willingness, nor the nurturing to do this by myself. I need the help of the fellowship and the help of my Higher Power. This help is freely given to me ~ all I need to do is accept it, and together we can make my habits more and more comfortable in the house of my life.
One day at a time...
With the help of my Higher Power and the program, I can patiently learn to practice healthy habits.
~ Isabella
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We urge you to try our program, for nothing will be so helpful to your husband as the radically changed attitude toward him which God will show you how to have. Go along with your husband if you possible can.
If you and your husband find a solution for the pressing problem of drink you are, of course, going to be very happy. But all problems will not be solved at once. Seed has started to sprout in a new soil, but growth has only begun. In spite of your new-found happiness, there will be ups and downs. Many of the old problems will still be with you. This is as it should be. - Pg. 117 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
You don't have to worry about your faults now or feel shame. None of us are near perfect, even if we've been clean and sober a long time. We strive for progress, not perfection.
Let me know I don't have to put up a front of perfection, my goal is progress in sobriety.
The Mystery
Today, I accept that part of myself that will never be satisfied, and I comfort and tame it. There is a place in me that knows it will never necessarily solve the eternal questions of life: Who am I and where do I come from, and where do I go when I die? Part of me wants to know the answers to these questions. But I am beginning to feel that the answer is to live fully in the question, to open to the mystery. Perhaps meaning is not knowing and understanding, but an acceptance of mystery, an embracing of the unknown. After all, it is this evanescent sense of mystery that gives even the most ordinary circumstance an eternal sort of glow - a sense of depth, a feeling that there is more.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Our greatest strengths taken too far become our greatest defects and our greatest defects tamed, become our virtues. Wrongly used, honesty can become brutal confrontation, nurturing can become 'I'll fix you,' and consistency can become inflexibility.
I examine my Fourth Step list and see how, properly used, each fault becomes a feature I desire.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Stark Raving Sober.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am doing everything that I can to totally accept me as I am.
Today I am doing everything that I can to totally accept you as you are.
I am free to have an honest relationship with me and you today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The newcomers ask; 'How do I stay out of sexual relationships in early sobriety?' Sort of an 11th Step; 'Prayer and masturbation'. Fred.
bluidkiti
09-26-2021, 11:31 AM
October 6
Daily Reflections
FACING OURSELVES
. . . . and Fear says, "You dare not look!"
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 49
How often I avoided a task in my drinking days,
just because it appeared so large! Is it any wonder
even if I have been sober for some time, that I will
act that same way when faced with what appears to be
a monumental job, such as a searching and fearless
moral inventory of myself? What I discover after I
have arrived at the other side--when my inventory is
completed--is that the illusion was greater than the
reality. The fear of facing myself kept me at a
standstill and, until I became willing to put pencil
to paper, I was arresting my growth based on an
intangible.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Is it my desire to be a big shot in A.A.? Do I always
want to be up front in the limelight? Do I feel that
nobody else can do as good a job as I can? Or am I
willing to take a seat in the back row once in a while
and let somebody else carry the ball? Part of the
effectiveness of any A.A. group is the development of
new members to carry on, to take over, from the older
members. Am I reluctant to give up authority? Do I try
to carry the load for the whole group? If so, I am not
being fair to the newer members. Do I realize that no
one person is essential? Do I know that A.A. could
carry on without me, if it had to?
Meditation For The Day
The Unseen God can help to make us truly grateful and
humble. Since we cannot see God, we must believe in Him
without seeing. What we can see clearly is the change in
a human being, when he sincerely asks God for the strength
to change. We should cling to faith in God and in His power
to change our faith in God and in His power to change our
ways. Our faith in all Unseen God will be rewarded by a
useful and serviceable life. God will not fail to show us
the way we should live. When in real gratitude and true
humility we turn to Him..
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may believe that God can change me.
I pray that I may be always willing to be changed
for the better.
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As Bill Sees It
To Lighten Our Burden, p.277
Only one consideration should qualify our desire for a complete
disclosure of the damage we have done. That will arise where a
full revelation would seriously harm the one to whom we are
making amends. Or--quite as important--other people. We
cannot, for example, unload a detailed account of extramarital
adventuring upon the shoulders of our unsuspecting wife or husband.
It does not lighten our burden when we recklessly make the crosses
of others heavy.
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In making amends, we should be sensible, tactful, considerate, and
humble without being servile or scraping. As God's people, we stand
on our feet; we don't crawl before anyone.
1. 12 & 12, p.86
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p.83
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Walk In Dry Places
By Their fruits
Inventory.
An old saying reminds us that the value of any spiritual effort can be measured
by how well it work: "A good tree is known by its fruits."
By that standard, the 12 Step movement fares very well. Its life-changing work
has won consistent praise and has had continuous success ever since it became
known to the public.
We can apply that same statement to new ideas as they appear in our lives. If
somebody has suggestions or advice, we might ask how well such ideas are working
out for them. We would not take investment advice, for example, from someone
who had repeatedly lost money.
We should always be wary of ideas that go counter to the basic principles of our
program. some people may invite us to share their resentments, for example, but we
have no obligation to do so. We will be even less inclined to do so when we look at
the results they're getting from their resentments, Evaluating ideas "by their fruits"
is a good test.
I'll be careful to look at all the facts in connection with any idea presented today.
I have a right to judge everything by results.
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Keep It Simple
If you do not tell the truth about yourself, you cannot tell it about other people.
---Virginia Woolf
Working the Twelve Steps helps us learn the truth. As we struggle with Step Four,
we learn the truth about ourselves. We learn even more about ourselves by doing
Steps Eight and Ten. When we admit the truth about ourselves, things come into
focus. Big changes happen.
As a result, we can see other people more clearly. We see bad sides in people we
thought were prefect. We see good sides in people we hated. We start to know that
everyone has to work hard to find what’s right for them. No one knows all the answers.
In short, we begin to trust others also who also are looking for the truth.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me clearly see myself and others.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think about how doing Step Ten keeps me clear
about what’s going on in my life.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Many people are living in an emotional jail without recognizing it. --Virginia Satir
Each of us is blessed with an internal guide, a source able to direct our actions if we
but acknowledge it. Never are we in doubt for long about what path to take. The
courage to take it might not be immediately forthcoming; however, it, too, is one
of the gifts with which we've been blessed. Courage is ours for the asking. Right
direction is ours for the taking.
Trusting our inner selves takes practice, followed by attention to the results of our risks.
Before recovery, many of us passively waited for others to orchestrate our behavior,
our feelings, and our attitudes. Stepping forward as the leading lady, with our own script
in hand is quite a change, but one we are being coached, daily, to make.
The Steps help us to know who we are. More importantly, they help us become the women
we long to be. But most important, they offer us the spiritual strength to risk listening to
the message within and the strength to go forth as directed.
Right results, again and again, are elicited by right action. And my knowledge of the right
action is always, and forever, as close as myself.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.
“How is that to come about?” you ask. “Where am I to find these people?”
p. 152
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I started drinking at age eighteen, rather a late bloomer by today's stands. But after I started, the disease of alcoholism hit me with a vengeance and made up for lost time. After I had been drinking for several years and seriously wondering if I did indeed have a problem with alcohol, I read one of the "Are You An Alcoholic?" quiz-type checklists. Much relieved, I found that almost nothing applied to me: I had never lost a job, a spouse, children, or any material possessions through alcohol. The fact that my drinking hadn't allowed me to gain any of those things crossed my mind only after I came to A.A.
p. 319
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. Without them we wouldn't be complete human beings. If men and women didn't exert themselves to be secure in their persons, made no effort to harvest food or construct shelter, there would be no survival. If they didn't reproduce, the earth wouldn't be populated. If there were no social instinct, if men cared nothing for the society of one another, there would be no society. So these desires--for the sex relation, for material and emotional security, and for companionship- -are perfectly necessary and right, and surely God-given.
p. 42
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I have held many things in my hands and have lost them all, but whatever I placed in
God's hands I still possess.
--GGDNER
Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do...
but how much love we put in that action.
--Mother Teresa
Live your life and forget your age.
--Norman Vincent Peale
In a world that is constantly changing, there is no one subject or set of
subjects that will serve you for the foreseeable future, let alone for the
rest of your life. The most important skill to acquire now is learning how to learn.
--John Naisbitt
"In helping others, we shall help ourselves, for whatever good we give out completes
the circle and comes back to us."
--Flora Edwards
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FORGIVENESS
"Forgiveness is the key to action
and freedom."
-- Hannah Arendt
Early in sobriety I found it easy to forgive others but hard to forgive myself. This kept me
sick and negative, even in recovery, because I was unable to practice self-love. I still
blamed me and felt responsible for being alcoholic. I had not surrendered to the reality of
alcoholism as a disease.
Then a moment of sanity was granted me whereby I understood that I was not responsible
for being alcoholic, but that I am responsible for my recovery. And my recovery involves
a love and respect of self. This knowledge brought a tremendous joy and freedom that led
to action within the recovering community. Only by loving me will I be able to
love you, and in both these ways I show my love of God.
May I always hold on to the spiritual power of forgiveness.
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"Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you."
1 Peter 5:7
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path. I have taken an oath and
confirmed it, that I will follow your righteous laws. I have suffered much; preserve
my life, O LORD, according to your word. Accept, O LORD, the willing praise of my
mouth, and teach me your laws. Though I constantly take my life in my hands, I will
not forget your law. The wicked have set a snare for me, but I have not strayed from
your precepts. Your statutes are my heritage forever; they are the joy of my heart.
My heart is set on keeping your decrees to the very end.
Psalm 119:105-112
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Daily Inspiration
Be aware of the blessings of friendship and know that to have a friend you must be
one in return. Lord, help me to be able to smile, to share, to listen and to be available
when I am needed.
God's promises are not for those who walk through life with no obstacles, but for those
who overcome their obstacles. Lord, I pray, not to overpower others, but to overcome
my own weaknesses and strengthen my trust in You.
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NA Just For Today
Amends Without Expectations
"Projections about actually making amends can be a major obstacle both in making the list and in becoming willing." Basic Text p.38
The Eighth Step asks us to become willing to make amends to all persons we have harmed. As we approach this step, we may wonder what the outcome of our amends will be. Will we be forgiven? Relieved of any lingering guilt? Or will we be tarred and feathered by the persons we've harmed?
Our tendency to seek forgiveness must be surrendered if we expect to receive the spiritual benefits of the Eighth and Ninth Steps. If we approach these steps expecting anything, we're likely to be very disappointed with the results. We want to ask ourselves if we are pinning our hopes on gaining the forgiveness of the person to whom we are making amends. Or maybe we're hoping we'll be excused from our debts by some sympathetic creditor moved to tears by our hard-luck story.
We need to be willing to make our amends regardless of the outcome. We can plan the amends, but we can't plan the results. Although we may not be granted a full pardon by everyone to whom we owe amends, we will learn to forgive ourselves. In the process, we will find that we no longer have to carry the burdens of the past.
Just for today: I will let go of any expectations I have on the people to whom I owe amends.
pg. 292
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
What we do upon some great occasion will probably depend on what we already are: and what we already are will be the result of previous years of self-discipline. --H. P. Viddon
In the ninth inning of the baseball game with a tie score and the bases loaded, the batter hit a home run. The fans and the team cheered wildly, and the batter was jubilant.
What many fans did not know was that he had been playing on baseball teams for fifteen years. Many times he struggled without being noticed. He wondered if he was any good or not, and there were days he had to make himself go out and practice. He made many mistakes, but his love and dedication for the game had always won out.
It is the years of discipline that prepare us for our big moments in life. Daily practice and love give our lives a direction, even through times of doubt and despair. By doing our best each day and learning from our mistakes, we prepare ourselves for the big moments--the home runs--in our lives.
How are my mistakes and pains today a part of my future success?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Forgiveness is another word for letting go. --Matthew Fox
Learning forgiveness - both granting it to others and accepting it for ourselves - is one of the primary means of a man's spiritual recovery. Many of us, after entering this program, are plagued with strong feelings of guilt. We have finally become accountable, and we see our lives in a new perspective. We long for a chance to undo our mistakes. Many men carry guilt for years as if they deserved to be punished. Our recovery program tells us to let go.
Simply going through the motions of forgiving or accepting forgiveness will not get us very far. We must squarely face our feelings and tell someone so we are no longer alone with our guilt. Then, if there is the possibility for repair without further hurt, we must make repair. In this concrete way we can be genuinely forgiven and fully accept forgiveness. When a man has a spiritual experience like this, he matures and gains the ability to forgive others.
I am grateful for the relief of being forgiven and letting go of past mistakes. I will genuinely let go of my guilt and resentment.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Many people are living in an emotional jail without recognizing it. --Virginia Satir
Each of us is blessed with an internal guide, a source able to direct our actions if we but acknowledge it. Never are we in doubt for long about what path to take. The courage to take it might not be immediately forthcoming; however, it, too, is one of the gifts with which we've been blessed. Courage is ours for the asking. Right direction is ours for the taking.
Trusting our inner selves takes practice, followed by attention to the results of our risks. Before recovery, many of us passively waited for others to orchestrate our behavior, our feelings, and our attitudes. Stepping forward as the leading lady, with our own script in hand is quite a change, but one we are being coached, daily, to make.
The Steps help us to know who we are. More importantly, they help us become the women we long to be. But most important, they offer us the spiritual strength to risk listening to the message within and the strength to go forth as directed.
Right results, again and again, are elicited by right action. And my knowledge of the right action is always, and forever, as close as myself.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Taking Care of Ourselves
It's healthy, wise, and loving to be considerate and responsive to the feelings and needs of others. That's different from caretaking. Caretaking is a self defeating and, certainly, a relationship defeating behavior - a behavior that backfires and can cause us to feel resentful and victimized - because ultimately, what we feel, want, and need will come to the surface.
Some people seem to invite emotional caretaking. We can learn to refuse the invitation. We can be concerned; we can be loving, when possible; but we can place value on our own needs and feelings too. Part of recovery means learning to pay attention to, and place importance on, what we feel, want, and need, because we begin to see that there are clear, predictable, and usually undesirable consequences when we don't.
Be patient and gentle with yourself as you learn to do this. Be understanding with yourself when you slip back into the old behavior of emotional caretaking and self-neglect.
But stop the cycle today. We do not have to feel responsible for others. We do not have to feel guilty about not feeling responsible for others. We can even learn to let ourselves feel good about taking responsibility for our needs and feelings.
Today, I will evaluate whether I've slipped into my old behavior of taking responsibility for another's feelings and needs, while neglecting my own. I will own my power, right, and responsibility to place value on myself.
Today I am doing everything that I can to totally accept me as I am. Today I am doing everything that I can to totally accept you as you are. I am free to have an honest relationship with me and you today. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 6
What Are Your Priorities?
I was working away in my cabin, trying to print out the pages I had typed into my computer. It was taking half an hour to print each page. I had one hundred pages to go. For the umpteenth time I checked my computer, checked the program, checked the printer, checked everything I knew to see why it was printing so slowly. It all seemed to be set up properly. Then I accidentally touched a control setting, one I hadn’t noticed before. It was my priority control. It was set on low. I switched it to high priority. The pages now began to print at top speed.
Priorities are important. Learning how to focus our energy according to priorities– even though we’re going with the flow– is an important part of our lives. It’s one of the powers we’re learning.
What are your priorities? Is living from your heart one of them? Are there tasks you’d like to accomplish? Skills you’d like to acquire? Is meditation being centered, and living your life from a place of balance an area you’ve designated as critical?
Is loving yourself a priority? How important is your spiritual growth? What priority have you assigned to other areas like pleasure, having fun, feeling joy? Are your priorities set on high, medium,or low?
Look around and you’ll see your answers. Your life as it is now reflects the priorities you have chosen so far. If something is happening too slowly, try switching your priority setting from low to high.
*****
more language of letting go
See it simple
"It's too much," I said to my instructor. "Jumping out of a plane is too much for my mind to comprehend."
"Then keep it simple," he said. "Break it down into parts. You have the ride up, where you practice relaxing, your exit, your free-fall time; then you deploy your parachute. Then you decide if it's working or if you need to go to plan B. Next set up your landing pattern. When you get near the ground, pull your strings and flare."
I could handle the steps, but the big picture of jumping out of an airplane was too much to envision. But exiting, falling stable, pulling, and flaring were simple parts that felt manageable. My mind could comprehend these simple tasks.
You may never make a skydive. Or maybe you will. But there's a lot of things in life that seem like too much if we try to see them all as one big thing. I never thought I could stay sober and drug-free for twenty-seven years. But with God's help and the help of the program, I believed I could refrain from using drugs and alcohol for twenty-four hours. Then the nexr day, I got up and believed the same thing again.
There have been times I didn't think I could start my life over. But I could get up in the morning and do the things I thought best for that day.
Are you facing something now in your life that feels too overwhelming? Then simplify it. Break it down into manageable parts until you can see how simple it is.
God, I'm complicating a task or making it too big and unmanageable in my mind, help me to simplify what I see.
*****
In All Kinds Of Weather
Being Happy For Friends
When we are close friends with someone, we intuitively know when they need a hug, a helping hand, or a sympathetic ear. Likewise, when we are going through bleak periods in our lives, we count on friends to support us through loss, illness, and other setbacks, both big and small. And while part of being a good friend means being there when the other person needs us, it is just as important to be there for our friends so we can share in their joyous celebrations and triumphs.
After all, who else would our friends want to celebrate their promotions, graduations, marriages, and good news with than their loved ones and good friends. Yet depending on what is happening in our lives, it can sometimes be difficult to be there for our friends during the good times. We can become so busy with our own lives that we forget to make time. Or, we may be so focused on our own problems that we may not feel like celebrating with our friends. We may even take their joyful moments for granted, assuming that as long as we’re there for our friends during the bad times that we are doing our jobs. Yet part of being a true friend means also being there during the good times. Success and happiness can feel empty without someone to share them with, and who better to join in our victory dances than our good friends.
Taking the time from our busy lives to honor our friends’ happy moments is a wonderful way to show them that they matter. And in many ways, by wanting you around during their happy occasions, your friends are also honoring you. After all, it is the people we cherish that we want around us to sing at our birthdays, visit our newborn babies, and pop open that bottle of champagne with when we reach a milestone moment. The next time a friend wants you to be there to celebrate with them, remember to feel honored that they thought of asking you. Together, you can celebrate their happiness and your rich friendship.
************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
As we “keep coming back” to meetings, we’re able to recognize those people who have an abundance of serenity. We are drawn to such people. to our surprise, we sometimes find that those who seem most grateeful for today’s blessings are the very ones who have the most serious and continuing problems at home or at work. Yet they have the courage to turn away from such problems, actively seeking to learn and hel others in The Program. How hav ethey gotten this serenity? It must be because they depend less on themselves and their own limited resources — and more on a Power greater than themselves in whom they have confidence. Am I acquiring the gift of serenity? Have my actions begun to reflect my inner faith?
Today I Pray
May I never cease to be awed by the serenity I see in oohters in my group — a serenity which manifest their comfortable surrender to a Higher Power. May I learn from them that peace of mind is possible even in the thick of trouble. May I, too, learn that I need to pull back from my problems now and then and draw upon the God-provided pool of serenity within myself.
Today I Will Remember
Serenity is surrender to God’s plan.
************************************
One More Day
Every human being is a problem in search of a solution.
– Ashely Montagu
Despite the occasional disance or coolness that many of us sense within, we are also aware of wellsprings of emotion, ready to flow with feelings that have been long hidden. It sometimes takes a crisis, such as illness, chemical deendency, or loss of a loved one to literally drive us to seek help.
Trying to uncover deeply hidden painful emotions can feel like a treacherous path to follow, and some of us may be tempted to stop trying. But if we honestly open ourselves to these feelings, we can begin to know ourselves better and to build healthyier and more mature relationships.
Change can be frightening, especially when I’ve been hiding from my own emotions. If there is a problem, dealing with my emotions is part of the solution.
************************************
Food For Thought
Staying with God
God never forsakes us; we forsake Him. We become so involved in our concerns and activities that we forget to open our eyes and our hearts to His presence. We may be physically abstinent, but still allow food to have the most important place in our lives. If our Higher Power is not at the center of our lives, we will find it difficult (if not impossible) to be emotionally abstinent.
Emotional binges occur when we wander away from our Higher Power into self-centered preoccupation. Without His control, we lose our serenity. There will always be cause of conflict and frustration in our daily lives. How we handle these situations depends on our spiritual condition.
By ourselves, we cannot manage our own lives. Our behavior can be insane. It is through the Power greater than ourselves that we are led into order, sanity, and recovery. To stay with this Power is our salvation.
May we not forsake You.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
LONGINGS
“The great question - which I have not been able
to answer - is, 'What does a woman want?'”
Sigmund Freud
All my life I have been searching for what I “really want”. I tried sports, different jobs, friends, lovers and traveling. I even tried therapy. None of these ever worked. Once I had what I thought I wanted, I didn't want it anymore. The urge to want -- to long for the best things -- was an inner, unsatisfied hunger. Excessive food became my sedating drug. When using food, I was numb to my longings. I felt it was impossible to fill this void. It seemed I would never know or receive what I wanted.
The 12 step program of recovery taught me that I could have anything I wanted -- if God gave it to me. When I stopped wanting everything so badly, and I surrendered to be His child and employee, I learned that what I'd thought of as “wanting”, was actually what I was “missing”. I missed everything important in my life, so I wanted everything. It was never enough ~ never the right thing or the right person. I felt that even I was "wrong" because I was without love, patience, tolerance or companionship. In OA I found all of that. With God's help, I now have those things in my life every day when I ask for it and accept it as part of me today.
One day at a time...
I no longer want so much, and I am thankful for what I receive. I am receiving more than I have ever dreamed of.
~ Trine
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn't deserve it. - Pg. 73 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now, you are getting rid of the toxic things in your life: toxic substances, toxic people, toxic behavior patterns and toxic thoughts. The only way to do this is to look, listen, and imitate those that have already done it. Slowly it becomes real for you, too.
I know that I cannot find this new path alone. Let me accept the guidance of those that have gone before me.
My Reservoir of Peace
There is nothing in my day that is more important than my serenity. It is my responsibility to maintain and attend to it. Whatever I do in the world, my serenity comes first. I owe it to no one. I will pay attention today to the myriad of ways in which I am thrown off balance and I will take a moment to center myself, to breathe, to remember that when I can calm my body, mind and spirit, I interact differently the people, places and things of my day. I will work daily to build my serenity muscles so that I stay strong and flexible. Serenity isn't something that I can just grab and have. I need to nourish it through quiet and reflection and come back to it what I lose it. My serenity is mine to look after. I give myself the gift of my own serenity today and every day.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'The choice is up to you. It can either be 'Good morning, God!' or 'Good God, morn-ing.' ~Dr. Wayne Dryer, Everyday Wisdom
Choice, not chance, determines my day.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Take the program seriously, not yourself.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I no longer decide what I should feel. That is very limiting.
If I limit my negative feelings, I limit my positive feelings as well.
Today I am opening myself to all my feelings. That gives me great joy.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I heard this guy sharing and he said : 'I ended up drinking wine, alone, in an alley.' I started out drinking wine, alone, in an alley. - Danny T.
bluidkiti
09-29-2021, 10:51 AM
October 7
Daily Reflections
DAILY MONITORING
Continued to take personal inventory. . . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 88
The spiritual axiom referred to in the Tenth Step--
"every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause,
there is something wrong with us"--also tells me that
there are no exceptions to it. No matter how unreasonable
others may seem, I am responsible for not reacting
negatively. Regardless of what is happening around me I
will always have the prerogative, and the responsibility,
of choosing what happens within me. I am the creator of
my own reality. When I take my daily inventory, I know
that I must stop judging others. If I judge others, I
am probably judging myself. Whoever is upsetting me most
is my best teacher. I have much to learn from him or her,
and in my heart, I should thank that person.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Do I put too much reliance on any one member of the group?
That is, do I make a tin god out of some one person? Do I
set that person on a pedestal? If I do, I am building my
house on sand. A.A. members have "clay feet." They are all
only one drink away from a drunk, no matter how long they
have been in A.A. This has been proved to be true more than
once. It's not fair to any member to be singled out as a
leader in A A. and to always quote that member on the A.A.
program. If that person should fail, where would I be?
Meditation For The Day
You must always remember that you are weak but that God is
strong. God knows all about your weakness. He hears every
cry for mercy, every sign of weakness, every plea for help,
every sorrow over failure, every weakness felt and expressed.
We only fail when we trust too much to our own strength. Do
not feel bad about your weakness. When you are weak, that is
when God is strong to help you. Trust God enough, and your
weakness will not matter. God is always strong to save.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may learn to lean on God's strength.
I pray that I may know that my weakness is God's opportunity.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Speak Up Without Fear, p.278
Few of us are anonymous so far as our daily contacts go. We have
dropped anonymity at this level because we think our friends and
associates ought to know about A.A. and what it has done for us. We
also wish to lose the fear of admitting that we are alcoholics. Though
we earnestly request reporters not to disclose our identities, we
frequently speak before semipublic gatherings. We wish to convince
audiences that our alcoholism is a sickness we no longer fear to discuss
before anyone.
If, however, we venture beyond this limit, we shall surely lose the principle
of anonymity forever. If every A.A. felt free to publish his own name, picture,
and story, we would soon be launched upon a vast orgy of personal publicity.
********************************
"While the so-called public meeting is questioned by many A.A. members,
I favor it myself providing only that anonymity is respected in press reports
and that we ask nothing for ourselves except understanding."
1. Grapevine, January 1946
2. Letter, 1949
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Taming the instincts.
Orderly direction
Though alcoholics can appear to have serious shortcomings, these problems
are really only misguided attempts to satisfy needs that must be met. In the
12 Step program, we do not deny our human needs. We realize, however, that
these needs must be met in moral, constructive ways. Falso methods of meeting
needs will bring false, harmful results.
We can meet our needs in an orderly manner by turning to our Higher Power and
following the slow and impractical, but over the longer term we will come to see that
it is the right way to live. Our instinctive needs are proper and God-given, but they
must not run wild in our lives. Living sober also means taming our instincts.
I'll not be surprised by the various needs I may feel today. I am committed, however,
to a moral and principled response to these needs.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
We never thought we could get old.---Bob Dylan
Here we are no longer children. Yet we’re not quite grown up either. At least,
we don’t always feels grown up. Our program helps us accept the stages of our life.
And the child in our heart is getting happier. In some ways, we feel younger everyday.
We’re also starting to feel older and wiser. It feels good. We’re not so afraid of the
world, because we’re learning better ways to live in it. We can learn by having friends
who teach us to stay young at heart.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be the best I can be, at the age I am today.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll call an older friend and ask him or her this question:
“What’s the most important thing you’ve learned about life since you were my age?”
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold.
--Ruth P. Freedman
We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single
event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something
valuable to our overall development. We must not discount the experiences that are
long gone. They contributed to all we've achieved at the present. And wherever today
takes us will influence what tomorrow will bring.
Perhaps our greatest difficulty as recovering women is not trusting that life is a process
and one that promises goodness. That growth and change are guaranteed. That our lives
have design, and we're blessed therein. Trusting isn't easy. But we can learn, and we'll
discover freedom.
Letting go of the outcome of every experience, focusing instead on our efforts, making them
as good as possible, validates our trust in the ultimate goodness of life. Our frustrations diminish
when our efforts, only, are our concern. How much easier our days go when we do our work and
leave the outcome where it belongs.
I will know a new freedom when I let go and trust that "my plan" is unfolding as it must. I will
do my part, and no more.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
You are going to meet these new friends in your own community. Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship. If you live in a large place, there are hundreds. High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Among them you will make lifelong friends. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties, for you will escape disaster together and you will commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey. Then you will know what it means to give of yourself that others may survive and rediscover life. You will learn the full meaning of “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”
pp. 152 - 153
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I can't blame one ounce of my drinking on my upbringing. My parents were loving and supportive and have been married thirty-five years. No one else in my family exhibits alcoholic drinking or alcoholic behavior. For some reason, despite the resources available to me growing up, I developed into an adult woman terrified of the world around me. I was extremely insecure, though I was careful to hide this fact. I was unable to handle and understand my emotions; I always felt as if everyone else knew what was going on and what they were supposed to be doing, and my life was the only one that was delivered without an instruction book.
pp. 319-320
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Yet these instincts, so necessary for our existence, often far exceed their proper functions. Powerfully, blindly, many times subtly, they drive us, dominate us, and insist upon ruling our lives. Our desires for sex, for material and emotional security, and for an important place in society often tyrannize us. When thus out of joint, man's natural desires cause him great trouble, practically all the trouble there is. No human being, however good, is exempt from these troubles. Nearly every serious emotional problem can be seen as a case of misdirected instinct. When that happens, our great natural assets, the instincts, have turned into physical and mental liabilities.
p. 42
************************************************** *********
With God everyday,
I make my way.
I hold on to God’s hand
As I journey through this land.
--Tammy
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within
us.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)
Do not let a desire for wealth cause you to become so consumed by your
work that you prevent happiness for yourself and your family. Happiness is foremost. A
look filled with understanding, and accepting smile, a loving word, a meal shared in
warmth and awareness are the things which create happiness in the present moment. By
nourishing awareness in the present moment, you can avoid causing suffering to yourself
and those around you.
--Thich Nhat Hanh
"No matter how much you talk to your plant, if you don't water it, it's going to die."
--Mike Perry
Thoughts and beliefs are nothing without action"
--James A. Ray
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
POWER
"The first and great
commandment is 'Don't let them
scare you.'"
-- Elmer Davis
In my sobriety I still need to deal with fear. A fear of people, a fear of not being good
enough, a fear of saying the wrong thing, a fear of not looking "good enough" --- fear still
haunts me in sobriety.
However, my recovery also tells me that I am a child of God. I am a beautiful and
powerful human being because God not only made me, but has shared something of His
precious divinity with me. I am good enough. In Him I can afford to risk. Love must begin
with the recognition of self.
Today I must remember that people are not "out to get me". I need not make myself the
victim. People are much the same inside, and we all need each other to survive.
Thank You for the power to live with my fear.
************************************************** *********
Let them give thanks for His unfailing love and His wonderful deeds for
men, for He satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.
Psalm 107:8-9
"Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you."
Psalm 55:22
We love Him, because He first loved us.
1 John 4:19
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Be grateful for the simple things that you can do such as being able to see, to walk, to have
health and to be able to face life with peace of mind. Lord, on a daily basis I will count my
many unnamed blessings.
Smile. If you know that God is with you and will never fail you, then you always have every
reason to smile. Lord, my heart seeks You and clings to You and I rejoice.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Depending On Our Higher Power
"As recovering addicts, we find that we are still dependent, but our dependence has shifted from the things around us to a loving God and the innerstrength we get in our relationship with Him."
Basic Text pp.67-68
For many addicts, rebelliousness is second nature. We didn't want to depend on anyone or anything, and especially not on God. The beauty of using, we thought, was that it gave us the power to be and feel anything we wanted, all by ourselves. But the price we paid for this illusory freedom was a dependence beyond our worst nightmares. Rather than freeing us, using enslaved us.
When we came to Narcotics Anonymous, we learned that dependence on God didn't have to mean what we may have thought it meant. Yes, if we wanted to be restored to sanity, we would need to tap "a Power greater than ourselves." However, we could choose our own concept of this Higher Power - we could even make one up. Dependence on a Higher Power would not limit us, we discovered; it would free us.
The Power we find in recovery is the power we lacked on our own. It is the love we were afraid to depend on others for. It is the sense of personal direction we never had, the guidance we couldn't humble ourselves to ask for or trust others to give. It is all these things, and it is our own. Today, we are grateful to have a Higher Power to depend on.
Just for today: I will depend on the love and inner strength I draw from the God of my own understanding.
pg. 293
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
There are two kinds of slaves, the prisoners of addiction, and the prisoners of envy. --Ivan Ilich
No emotion brings us more personal pain or wastes more of our time than envy. When we envy, we are never free from stress, because envy takes no holidays. Shakespeare called envy the green sickness. Envy magnifies molehills into mountains.
Just how foolish envy truly is becomes clear when we think of it as a row of hooks on which to hang grudges. When we envy others, especially our family members, we blind ourselves to the good we could see in all people. We are ignoring life's flowers to gather bouquets of weeds.
When we envy the accomplishments or possessions of another, we will be better off if we look to our own prized possessions, to those things in ourselves that no one else has in exactly the same way.
What riches do I have within and around me?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If there are two hundred people in a room and one of them doesn't like me, I've got to get out. --Marlon Brando
How much acceptance is enough for us? Do we feel one person's criticism undermines the acceptance of 199 others? Do we get so focused on one person's negative response to us that we cannot hear the positive? If we are unable to accept criticism from others, it becomes a sink without a plug, draining away all the positives we naturally have in our life.
As we become spiritual men, we're able to detach from negative and critical messages. We must still hear them. We must still listen to their messages because we can learn from them. But we can separate ourselves from the negative message. We can make a mistake. Someone can dislike us. But we do not give up our places as equal, worthwhile men for any reason.
God, I pray for your support when my own strength to stand up for myself falters.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
There is a divine plan of good at work in my life. I will let go and let it unfold. --Ruth P. Freedman
We are never certain of the full importance or the eventual impact of any single event in our lives. But of one thing we can be sure: Each experience offers something valuable to our overall development. We must not discount the experiences that are long gone. They contributed to all we've achieved at the present. And wherever today takes us will influence what tomorrow will bring.
Perhaps our greatest difficulty as recovering women is not trusting that life is a process and one that promises goodness. That growth and change are guaranteed. That our lives have design, and we're blessed therein. Trusting isn't easy. But we can learn, and we'll discover freedom.
Letting go of the outcome of every experience, focusing instead on our efforts, making them as good as possible, validates our trust in the ultimate goodness of life. Our frustrations diminish when our efforts, only, are our concern. How much easier our days go when we do our work and leave the outcome where it belongs.
I will know a new freedom when I let go and trust that "my plan" is unfolding as it must. I will do my part, and no more.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Naivete
We can be loving, trusting people and still not allow ourselves to be used or abused. We don't have to let people do whatever they want to us. Not all requests are legitimate! Not all requests require a yes!
Life may test us. People may seek out our weak spots. We may see a common denominator to the limits that are being tested in our life. If we have a weak spot in one area, we may find ourselves tested repeatedly in that area by family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors. Life, people, our Higher Power, and the universe may be trying to teach us something specific.
When we learn that lesson, we will find that problems with that area dwindle. The boundary has been set, the power has been owned. For now, the lesson has been learned. We may need to be angry with certain people for a while, people who have pushed our tolerance over the edge. That's okay. Soon, we can let go of the anger and exchange it for gratitude. These people have been here to help us learn about what we don't want, what we won't tolerate, and how to own our power.
We can thank them for what we have learned.
How much are we willing to tolerate? How far shall we let others go with us? How much of our anger and intuition shall we discount? Where are our limits? Do we have any? If we don't, we're in trouble.
There are times to not trust others, but instead trust ourselves and set boundaries with those around us.
Today, I will be open to new awareness about the areas where I need healthier boundaries. I will forego my naive assumption that the other person is always right. I will exchange that view for trusting myself, listening to myself, and having and setting healthy boundaries.
I no longer decide what I should feel. That is very limiting. If I limit my negative feelings, I limit my positive feelings as well. Today I am opening myself to all my feelings. That gives me great joy. --Ruth Fishel
************************************
Journey To The Heart
October 7
Value the Power of Seeing
I have learned a valuable tool. It is one of the easiest and most powerful tools I’ve been given. I call it the power of seeing.
It is the simple act of observing myself: what I do, how I react, how I respond to others. It is particularly useful in situations that have gotten confused or sticky and I don’t know what to do to become unstuck. When I feel overwhelmed or a situation gets too difficult and I can’t see my way through, I watch myself. It helps.
Learn to observe yourself. Let yourself really see and be present in the moment in the situation you’re in. Watch yourself as a neutral observer would, without judgement. Try to see the other person in the same way. Watch how the two of you interact, respond to each other. Watch yourself think and feel. See the actions you take. You don’t have to talk about what you’re doing; it’s better if you don’t. Just stay with yourself. Do it once. Do it twice. Then do it again.
Soon you’ll begin to see something else: you’ll begin to see the situation change, evolve, take a turn for the better. The power of seeing is one most of us can easily claim. It helps, heals, and sometimes produces miracles. Physicists have deicided that the act of observing can impact the behavior, appearance, or energy of whatever is being observed. How we look at someone, including ourselves, can have an impact, cause a change.
There’s power in seeing. There’s even more power in seeing with the eyes of love.
*****
more language of letting go
Tell yourself how simple it is
Here's another example about the power of simplification.
For years, I heard about hiking. It sounded so elusive, difficult, and mysterious. I didn't do it, but I thought about hiking wistfully. One day, a friend asked me to go hiking with him. "Sure," I said. As the day of our hike approached, I began thinking things through. I was getting a little nervous. What if I couldn't do it well enough? What if I didn't know how to do it at all?
Don't be ridiculous, I scolded myself. You're making this much more complicated than it really is. Hiking is just walking, and you've been doing that since you were ten months old.
The next day, I arose at 6:00 A.M., and my friend and I left for our hike. I followed my friend as he began walking up the steep incline.
Just walk, I told myself after the first ten steps. Put one foot in front of another. Walk like you've done all your life.
I didn't make it to the top of the mountain that day, but I made it almost halfway.
Is there something you've wanted to do but have put off because it sounds too difficult and complicated? Are you saying no to something in your life that you'd like to say yes to, but it seems elusive and out of your reach? Try reducing the task or activity to its simplest form.
I have a friend who hadn't dated for years. One day, a girl he liked asked him to go to the movies. He was anxious and nervous.
"Going to a movie is just sitting down and staring at the screen, then getting up and going home when you've finished," I said. "I think you can do that."
"You're right," he said. He went and had a great time.
Sometimes we can scare ourselves out of doing the easiest thing in life. Yes, hiking involves more than walking. And going on a date with someone involves a little more than sitting and staring at a screen. But not that much more. Simplify things. Bring them down to their most manageable level. Instead of talking yourself out of living, learn to talk yourself into it.
God, give me the courage to fully live my life. Help me deliberately talk myself into doing things, instead of scaring myself away.
*****
Avoiding Negative Vibrations
Taking on the Energy of Others
There are times when you may find that being around certain individuals or groups of people leaves you with feelings of discomfort. It may be that spending time with a particular friend feels draining or that dealing with a specific coworker exhausts you. Being around toxic or angry people is also draining. And you may even find that being surrounded by a crowd of people lowers your energy levels rather than perks you up. This is not that unusual. Each of us radiates energy and is capable of being influenced by the energy of other people. It is important to learn how to shield yourself, so you don’t unknowingly take on someone else’s energy. While some people know how to instinctively protect themselves from being adversely affected by energy, most of us need to discover and practice the technique that works best.
There are a number of ways to avoid being affected by people’s energy. Shielding is one preventative technique you can use. Center yourself and envision being enveloped in a cocoon of loving and protective light. This protective layer should allow you to consciously regulate the energy around you. The intent to shield oneself is all you need for this technique to work. You can even create a trigger word to assist you in quickly creating a shield. Say this word each time you create a new shield, until the word and the shield become automatically associated in your mind. If you run into a person whose energy you find draining, you may want to cleanse your own energy field after your encounter. Sage, cold showers, singing, mineral water baths, spending time in nature, and a simple break to recharge are all ways to accomplish this.
While it is important to know how to shield yourself from energy, there are those energies that you may not want to shut out. The energy of laughter from a newborn baby, the feeling of joy radiating from someone in love, and the frequency of calm emanating from an enlightened teacher are just some of the energies coming from others that you may want to have around you. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I first read the Serenity Prayer, the word “serenity” itself seemed like an impossibility. At the time, the word conjured up images of lethargy, apathy, resignation, or grim-faced endurance; it hardly seemed a desirable goal. But I’ve since found that serenity means none of those things. Serenity for me today is simply a clear-eyed and realistic way of seeing the world, accompanied by inner peace and strength. My favorite definition is, “Serenity is like a gyroscope that lets us keep our balance no matter what turbulence swirls around us.” Is that a state of mind worth aiming for?
Today I Pray
may I notice that “serenity” comes first, ahead of “courage” and “wisdom,” in the sequence of the Serenity Prayer. May I believe that “serenity” must also come first in my life. I must have the balance, realistic outlook and acceptance that is part of this blessing of serenity before I can go on to the kind of action and decision-making that will bring order to my existence.
Today I Will Remember
Serenity comes first.
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One More Day
Honor your challenges, for those spaces that you label as dark are actually there to bring you more light.
– Sanaya Roman
Many of us have wondered whether we should begin using adaptive living aids openly. We worry about what people would think if they saw us using equipment that brands us as handicapped. We fear embarrassment. Some folks never solve the problem, and they stay at home, trapped by their fears of being noticed, of being different. It’s difficult to forfeit the anonymity of being the same as everyone else.
One thing is certain — without special gadgets, we have to ask for help. So, with foresight and a fierce sense of independence, many of us grasp any opportunity to “do” for ourselves. We can use aids because they will assist and support our zest for life.
I will risk being different. By using adaptive devices I can remain more independent.
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Food For Thought
Old Anxieties
The causes of our past anxieties may no longer be operative. Compulsive eating behavior, however, brings back these anxieties in full force. Our weight may be normal, but we are never safe from the danger of personality disintegration brought on by a return, however slight, to compulsive overeating habits.
If we are to maintain our sanity and our sobriety, we must continue to abstain completely from all patterns of thinking and behavior associated with overeating. We have become new people. Daily we grow stronger and freer from old fears and anxieties. The new behavior, which gives us this new freedom, is abstinence. Without abstinence, we will again be overwhelmed and incapacitated by irrational fear and anxiety.
To be alive is to experience a certain amount of anxiety. We will never be completely rid of all fear. As long as we are abstaining, however, and relying on our Higher Power instead of ourselves, we will be given the confidence and serenity we need.
I turn over to You my anxieties.
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One Day At A Time
WISDOM
“Wisdom ceases to be wisdom
when it becomes too proud to weep,
too grave to laugh,
and too selfish to seek other than itself.”
Kahlil Gibran
When I heard the serenity prayer at the first OA meeting I attended, I didn’t understand what it meant to accept what I couldn’t change, have courage to change the things I could, and wisdom to know the difference. I said it at each meeting and hoped that eventually I would somehow find that wisdom. It was quite some time into my recovery when I finally understood what having wisdom really meant.
Before Program, I never accepted things or people the way they were. I felt paralyzed by my fears about what wasn’t working in my life. This fear kept me from seeing what I could change, or even try to change, in my life.
I finally realized that before coming into the Program I had put on a mask and never let anyone know the real me. I didn’t know how to laugh or cry, and I certainly never knew how to reach out to others because it was always about me and my unfortunate life.
But once I finally allowed myself to be real and vulnerable with others, miracles began to happen. I became more willing to accept people and places as exactly the way they should be at that time. I was able to walk through my fears and learn what I could change in my life. To my delight, when I became more vulnerable to others it didn’t make me weak; rather, I felt a strength and power flow through me and I became more able to know the difference between what I could or couldn’t change, and for me, that is wisdom.
One day at a time...
May I always be willing to know the difference between what I can and cannot change.
~ Sharon S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We will be more reconciled to discussing ourselves with another person when we see good reasons why we should do so. The best reason first: If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking. Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods. Almost invariably they got drunk. - Pgs. 72-73 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
'First Things First' is definitely a good philosophy but in the third week of recovery it seems impossible. For us at this time the ONLY thing we have to do is stay away from that first fix, pill, or drink.
Whatever problems I think I have, the first and most important consideration is to stay away from that first fix, pill, snort, or drink!
Putting in the Elbow Grease
I will be willing to do the daily work that is required to have the life I want to have. A good life is brought forth through many doors. The door of visualization, the door or seeing and the door of work. As I progress along my path I will learn how to 'work smarter'. How to use my energies more efficiently and waste less time needlessly. I'll learn how to get out of my own way and let my energies flow more freely. I'll learn how to listen to others and make my own decisions, how to have boundaries that are porous and flexible rather than either rigid or weak. I will find my sense of self and be able to sustain it even in the presence of others. I'll develop strength, wisdom, patience and compassion. I will develop my own unique gifts and strengths.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Why wonder why? Why ask why? The 'why' questions spring from only one place inside: self-pity. The questions to ask are the 'how' questions. The right questions contain clues to the answers we need.
When I ask the right question, I get the right answer.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Keep an unmade mind instead of a mind made up.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm stretching myself and taking new risks.
Today the faith is working to replace the fear that has held me back.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm not responsible for my next thought, only my next action. Anon.
bluidkiti
09-29-2021, 10:51 AM
October 8
Daily Reflections
DAILY INVENTORY
. . . . and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 59
I was beginning to approach my new life of sobriety with
unaccustomed enthusiasm. New friends were cropping up
and some of my battered friendships had begun to be
repaired. Life was exciting, and I even began to enjoy my
work, becoming so bold as to issue a report on the lack
of proper care for some of our clients. One day a co-worker
informed me that my boss was really sore because a complaint,
submitted over his head, had caused him much discomfort at
the hands of his superiors. I knew that my report had created
the problem, and began to feel responsible for my boss's
difficulty. In discussing the affair, my co-worker tried to
reassure me that an apology was not necessary, but I soon
became convinced that I had to do something, regardless of how
it might turn out. When I approached my boss and owned up to
my hand in his difficulties, he was surprised. But unexpected
things came out of our encounter, and my boss and I were able
to agree to interact more directly and effectively in the future.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
There is such a thing as being too loyal to any one group.
Do I feel put out when another group starts and some members
of my group leave it and branch out into new territory? Or do
I send them out with my blessing? Do I visit that new offshoot
group and help it along? Or do I sulk in my own tent? A.A.
grows by the starting of new groups all the time. I must
realize that it's a good thing for a large group to split up
into smaller ones, even it if means that the large group
--my own group--becomes smaller. Am I always ready to help
new groups?
Meditation For The Day
Pray--and keep praying until it brings peace and serenity and
a feeling of communion with One who is near and ready to help.
The thought of God is balm for our hates and fears. In praying
to God, we find healing for hurt feelings and resentments. In
thinking of God, doubts and fears leave us. Instead of those
doubts and fears, there will flow into our hearts such faith
and love as is beyond the power of material things to give, and
such peace as the world can neither give nor take away. And with
God, we can have the tolerance to live and let live.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have true tolerance and understanding.
I pray that I may keep striving for these difficult things.
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As Bill Sees It
The Fine Art Of Alibis, p.279
The majority of A.A. members have suffered severely from
self-justification during their drinking days. For most of us,
self-justification was the maker of excuses for drinking and for all
kinds of crazy and damaging conduct. We had made the invention
of alibis a fine art.
We had to drink because times were hard or times were good, We
had to drink because at home we were smothered with love or not
none at all. We had to drink at work because we were great
successes or dismal failures. We had to drink because our nation
had won a war or lost a peace. And so it went, ad infinitum.
********************************
To see how our own erratic emotions victimized us often took a long
time. Where other people were concerned, we had to drop the
word "blame" from our speech and thought.
12 & 12
1. pp. 46-47
2. p. 47
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Walk In Dry Places
Changing other people
Relating to others.
"How can I get this person to accept the program?" We hear this often,
for example, when a patient at a treatment center complains about another
who is so negative toward the program "That he's dragging all of us down."
We discovered long ago that we have no power to change or manipulate
others. At the very beginning of AA, its pioneers learned how to maintain
their own sobriety and serenity even as others rebelled and turned against
the program. They learned that negative people can't drag us down unless
we let them.
We might need to review our personal inventory if we're too concerned about
the behavior of others. Ours is a program of attraction, not coercion, and we
"change" people only by demonstrating how well it works for us. Any concern
about another's behavior takes time and energy away from our own commitment
to self-improvement.
I have a personal need and responsibility to carry the mess, but I have neither
the right nor the responsibility to modify anybody's behavior. I'll keep this in
mind today.
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Keep It Simple
Just Say No.--- Nancy Reagan
We addicts were great at saying no. Our spouse asked us to help around the house
and we said no and went drinking. Friends tried to care, but we said, “No, mind your
own business!” Our parents or our kids begged us to stop drinking, but we said no.
We were also ask to say yes. We always said yes when asked if we wanted to have
a drink or get high. Addiction really mixed us up. When we said no, we should have
said yes. And when we said yes we should have said no.
In recovery, we do things better. We say yes when others ask for help. We say yes
when somebody wants to give us love. We say no to alcohol and other drugs. We
finally answer yes and no the right way---the right way and at the right time for us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to always say yes to You, even when
I’m tired or angry.
Action for the Day: In today’s inventory, I’ll ask myself if there are any ways I’m
still saying no to my program and Higher Power.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The great creative power is everything. If you leave out one whole chunk of it,
by making God only masculine, you have to redress the balance. --Martha Boesing
What a blessing, to be part of God! For many of us, invoking God with a male
pronoun put an obstacle in the path of our spiritual growth. We felt left out.
Worship of something called "He" or "Him" didn't jibe with our spirituality.
When we pray, we pray to a spiritual source that includes everything, that leaves
nothing out: sexes, all races, all ages and conditions.
Some of us had no trouble understanding that God is everything, no matter how
God is invoked. But whatever our path to spirituality, the Twelve Step program
has enriched our understanding. Before we practiced the Twelve Steps, we had
allowed ourselves to forget the strength and nurture that are always at hand,
and now we are grateful to be reminded that God is with us, within us, and all is well.
One woman says, "When I feel far from God, I ask myself: Who moved?"
God is always there. Today I will pray for the wisdom to stay close to my spiritual
source, the Creator Spirit.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is till with us. Our own recovery proves that!
p. 153
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
When I discovered alcohol, everything changed. I took my first real drink my first night of college. I attended what was to be the first of many, many fraternity parties. I didn't care for the beer, so I went for the vat of innocuous-looking punch. I was told it was laced with grain alcohol. I don't remember how many drinks I had, and my recollections of the actual events of the rest of the night are fuzzy, but I do remember this much: When I was drinking, I was okay. I understood. Everything made sense. I could dance, talk, and enjoy being in my own skin. It was as if I had been an unfinished jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing; as soon as I took a drink, the last piece instantly and effortlessly snapped into place.
p. 320
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Step Four is our vigorous and painstaking effort to discover what these liabilities in each of us have been, and are. We want to find exactly how, when, and where our natural desires have warped us. We wish to look squarely at the unhappiness this has caused others and ourselves. By discovering what our emotional deformities are, we can move toward their correction. Without a willing and persistent effort to do this, there can be little sobriety or contentment for us. Without a searching and fearless moral inventory, most of us have found that the faith which really works in daily living is still out of reach.
pp. 42-43
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I will exercise patience, as God would, with all others.
--Shelley
"Youth is like spring, an over praised season more remarkable for biting winds than
genial breezes.
Autumn is the mellower season, and what we lose in flowers we more than gain in fruits."
--Samuel Butler
AA is my anchor in a sea of confusion.
AA brought me home when I had lost my way.
Newcomer or long-timer, we are all the same in our need for each other.
Think it over, not drink over it.
"The voyage of discovery lies not in finding new landscapes, but in having new eyes."
--Marcel Proust
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
UNDERSTANDING
"Intelligence is proved not by
ease of learning but by
understanding what we learn."
-- Joseph Whitney
For years I learned things without understanding what the words, or the meaning behind
the words, really meant. An example was alcoholism. Then a man said, "My name is Bill,
and I am an alcoholic and a recovering human being!" Then it struck me; recovery from a
drug --- alcohol --- was not simply about putting down the glass but about changing and
developing a positive lifestyle as a human being.
The same is true with spirituality. It is not about being religious, going to church or
accepting dogma. It is about finding God in my life, discovering God in the decisions and
actions I take and seeing Him in the world around me. Today I understand spirituality to
be the link that unites all peoples and is centered on what is true and real.
May I continue to search for the meaning within the word and the harmony of
communication.
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Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress.
Psalm 107:13
"By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer
to the God of my life."
Psalm 42:8
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Daily Inspiration
Waste no time on situations that aren't worth your precious time. Lord, may
I recognize pettiness for what it is and move on so that my imagination doesn't
take over and give pettiness more value than it deserves.
Ultimate security does not come from relying on things or people, but from
relying on God. Lord, I place my trust in You. Bless me and keep me in Your
loving care.
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NA Just For Today
A New Pattern Of Living
"We suspect that if we do not use what we have, we will lose what we have."
Basic Text p. 75
Addiction gave a pattern to our lives, and with it a meaning - a dark, diseased meaning, to be sure, but a meaning nonetheless. The Narcotics Anonymous recovery program gives us a new pattern of living to replace our old routines. And with that new pattern comes a new meaning to our lives, one of light and hope.
What is this new pattern of living? Instead of isolation, we find fellowship. Instead of living blindly, repeating the same mistakes again and again, we regularly examine ourselves, free to keep what helps us grow and discard what doesn't. Rather than constantly trying to get by on our own limited power, we develop a conscious contact with a loving Power greater than ourselves.
Our life must have a pattern. To maintain our recovery, we must maintain the new patterns our program has taught us. By giving regular attention to these patterns, we will maintain the freedom we've found from the deadly disease of addiction, and keep hold of the meaning recovery has brought to our lives.
Just for today: I will begin a new pattern in my life: the regular maintenance of my recovery.
pg. 294
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Learn what you are and be such. --Pindar
The most precious gift we can give those closest to us is honesty. Yet we often hide our true selves from friends, fearing we won't be accepted or loved if we let them see the real us. Often, we show parts of ourselves that hide who we really are. We have often heard ourselves or others say, "My parents would just die if . . . ," or, "don't argue in front of the children."
If we hide too much behind false images, we run the risk of losing track of what is real and what is false. We become actors instead of real people, trying to please Aunt Jane, our grandparents, our big brother, or our children.
When we conquer our fear of letting others in, we are able to see ourselves honestly. When we discover that others accept us as we are, we can accept and love ourselves. To know oneself is to know a person of value.
What part of me have I been hiding?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We cannot avoid
Using power,
Cannot escape the compulsion
To afflict the world,
So let us, cautious in diction
And mighty in contradiction,
Love powerfully.
--Martin Buber
The use and misuse of power by men give us much to weep over and much to admire. In our own families we see how our parents fought over power, how they used it both wisely and abusively. Our problems with power and control are a central part of our addictions and codependency. Admitting our powerlessness has started us toward recovery. Admitting our power will help carry us further.
No one is innocent beyond childhood. We affect the people around us, and it matters how we treat them. We cannot come and go unnoticed. Since we will make an impact, we learn to treat ourselves and the people around us with respect and justice. Our only solution is to learn to love and be loved.
Today, I will be more aware of the power I have in others' lives.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The great creative power is everything. If you leave out one whole chunk of it, by making God only masculine, you have to redress the balance. --Martha Boesing
What a blessing, to be part of God! For many of us, invoking God with a male pronoun put an obstacle in the path of our spiritual growth. We felt left out. Worship of something called "He" or "Him" didn't jibe with our spirituality. When we pray, we pray to a spiritual source that includes everything, that leaves nothing out: sexes, all races, all ages and conditions.
Some of us had no trouble understanding that God is everything, no matter how God is invoked. But whatever our path to spirituality, the Twelve Step program has enriched our understanding. Before we practiced the Twelve Steps, we had allowed ourselves to forget the strength and nurture that are always at hand, and now we are grateful to be reminded that God is with us, within us, and all is well.
One woman says, "When I feel far from God, I ask myself: Who moved?" God is always there. Today I will pray for the wisdom to stay close to my spiritual source, the Creator Spirit.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Learning to Wait
I've started to realize that waiting is an art, that waiting achieves things. Waiting can be very, very powerful. Time is a valuable thing. If you can wait two years, you can sometimes achieve something that you could not achieve today, however hard you worked, however much money you threw up in the air, however many times you banged your head against the wall. . .
--The Courage to Change by Dennis Wholey
The people who are most successful at living and loving are those who can learn to wait successfully. Not many people enjoy waiting or learning patience. Yet, waiting can be a powerful tool that will help us accomplish much good.
We cannot always have what we want when we want it. For different reasons, what we want to do, have, be, or accomplish is not available to us now. But there are things we could not do or have today, no matter what, that we can have in the future. Today, we would make ourselves crazy trying to accomplish what will come naturally and with ease later.
We can trust that all is on schedule. Waiting time is not wasted time. Something is being worked out - in us, in someone else, in the Universe.
We don't have to put our life on hold while we wait. We can direct our attention elsewhere; we can practice acceptance and gratitude in the interim; we can trust that we do have a life to live while we are waiting - then we go about living it.
Deal with your frustration and impatience, but learn how to wait. The old saying, "You can't always get what you want" isn't entirely true. Often, in life, we can get what we want - especially the desires of our heart - if we can learn to wait.
Today, I am willing to learn the art of patience. If I am feeling powerless because I am waiting for something to happen and I am not in control of timing, I will focus on the power available to me by learning to wait.
Today I'm stretching myself and taking new risks. Today the faith is working to replace the fear that has held me back. --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey To The Heart
October 8
Leave When It’s Time to Go
It’s time to pick up, pack up, and leave.
You knew you wouldn’t be in this situation in this place with these people forever. Trust the rhythms and cycles of life. Take responsibility for yourself within each cycle. Take responsibility for yourself as each cycle ends and a new one begins.
You don’t have to hold onto messengers after they’ve delivered the message in your life, or escorts after they’ve taken you where you were trying to go. You don’t have to stay in a classroom after you’ve learned the lessons and finished that course.
Open your heart. Thank the people, places, and things that have helped create your world, shape you, form your experiences. Then pick up, pack up, and leave. Say good-bye with love and gratitude in your heart.
And go on down the road.
*****
more language of letting go
Go at your own pace
This part of the path was steep. And the altitude change was severe. I was gasping for breath and trying not to grimace at the ache in my legs as my hiking partner strode up the path in front of me.
He stopped and looked back. I was definitely trailing behind. If his legs were aching the way mine were, his stride didn't show it. I knew how it felt to hold yourself back to someone else's pace. I didn't want to do that to him just because I was out of shape.
"You go on ahead," I yelled.
He looked reluctant.
"Go. Hike at your own pace. I'll hike at mine."
I convinced him to leave me behind. Just because we came together didn't mean that we had to hike, or walk as I preferred to call it, in the same stride. My friend went on ahead of me and disappeared from sight. I hiked, then rested, then hiked, then rested. Once, I stopped, took off my backpack, and took a nap.
My friend and I joined up toward the end of the day. We made the trek down the mountain together, side by side.
Even though we simplify things, most things are harder than we think. It's important to let each person go at their own pace. Whether it's working through an issue or tackling a project in your life, find the pace that works for you. Let others do the same.
Don't compare yourself to those around you. Let yourself be energized by their pace, but respect the rhythm that works for you.
God, help me know that each of us has our own rhythm for getting through life. Help me honor and enjoy the rhythms that work for me.
*****
Centered Silliness
Laughing Meditation by Madisyn Taylor
When we laugh, we give ourselves over to the immediacy of the present moment and transcend stress.
Many people might be surprised to think of laughter as a form of meditation. Yet not only is laughing meditation one of the simplest forms of meditation, but also it is a very powerful one. The physical act of laughing is one of the few actions involving the body, emotions, and the soul. When we laugh, we give ourselves over to the immediacy of the present moment. We also are able to momentarily transcend minor physical and mental stresses. Practiced in the morning, laughing meditation can lend a joyful quality to the entire day. Practiced in the evening, laughing meditation is a potent relaxant that has been known to inspire pleasant dreams. Laughter also can help open our eyes to previously unnoticed absurdities that can make life seem less serious.
There are three stages to mindful laughter. Each stage can last anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes. The first stage involves stretching your body like a cat and breathing deeply. Your stretch should start at the hands and feet before you move through the rest of your body. Stretch out the muscles in your face by yawning and making silly faces. The second stage of the meditation is pure laughter. Imagine a humorous situation, remember funny jokes, or think about how odd it is to be laughing by yourself. When the giggles start to rise, let them. Let the laughter ripple through your belly and down into the soles of your feet. Let the laughter lead to physical movement. Roll on the floor, if you have to, and keep on laughing until you stop. The final stage of the meditation is one of silence. Sit with your eyes closed and focus on your breath.
Laughter brings with it a host of positive effects that operate on both the physical and mental levels. It is also fun, expressive, and a way to release tension. Learn to laugh in the present moment, and you’ll find that joy is always there. Published with permission from Daily OM
******
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Determination — our clenched-jaw resolve that we can do something about everything — is perhaps the greatest hindrance to achieving serenity. Our old tapes tell us, “The difficult can be done immediately; the impossible will take a little longer.” So we tighten up and prepare ourselves for battle, even though we know from long experience that our own will dooms us in advance to failure. Over and over we are told in The Program that we must “Let Go and Let God.” And we eventually do find serenity when we put aside our own will while accepting His will for us. Am I learning to relax my stubborn grip? Do I allow the solutions to unfold by themselves?
Today I Pray
May I loosen my tight-jaw, my tight-fists, my general up-tightness — outward indications of the “do it myself” syndrome which has gotten me into trouble before. May I know from experience that this attitude — of “keep a grip on yourself” and on everybody else, too — is accompanied by impatience and followed by frustration. May I merge my own will with the greater will of God.
Today I Will Remember
Let up on the strangle-hold.
*****
One More Day
Love is all we have, the only way that each can help the other. – Euripides
We may tend to love our family members only with qualifications. Only if they don’t complain about their problems. Only if they are more successful. Perhaps we don’t say this directly, but we might be communicating these qualifications to our loved ones by holding back or by making indirect suggestions as to how they should live their lives.
We may be able to give our love more fully if we remember how much we need acceptance. We don’t want to receive love that is prefaced by “only if . . .” Only if we don’t complain. Only if we stop talking about our illness. We all need the comfort and support of love based on what we are, not on what others think we can or should be. Our loved ones need the same thing.
Knowing I am loved and can love others is an unqualified manner strengthens me.
************************************
Food For Thought
Learning from Mistakes
We can learn from our mistakes so that we do not have to make the same ones over and over again. If a particular attitude or situation consistently makes it difficult for us to follow our food plan, then that attitude or situation needs to be changed. Slips do not just happen. They indicate that something is wrong with our program and that we have not yet learned what we need to know about ourselves.
Being aware of the circumstances, which make us vulnerable to overeating, helps us to be prepared for temptation and to find ways to avoid it wherever possible. If there are certain foods, which we cannot resist, then we should not have those foods available. If trying to do too much makes us tired and emotionally upset, then we need to be less ambitious and learn to delegate responsibility. Compulsive overeating or emotional bingeing indicates that we are not living in a way, which satisfies our basic needs.
Lord, may we learn from our mistakes.
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One Day At A Time
WISDOM
“Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.
Those who do not recover are people who cannot
or will not completely give themselves to this simple program.”
The AABB, Chapter 5
I always believed that I had to control every aspect of my life or I would be a “less-than” person. This attitude even crept into my attempts to learn the art of watercolor still life and portraits. Even my art could not escape the effects of my character defects! In order to learn something new, I have to be willing to follow the rules of the very thing I want to learn. I shared this with an experienced artist and best friend, “I find myself still wanting to control the outcome of the colors.”
“Isn’t that the way we try to control our lives? She replied. “Drop the paint where you want it to go, then drop the second color into that one and let it go! You can take your brush and guide it, but don’t mess with it!”
My life is like learning to watercolor. I have to trust that doing the footwork of recovery as others have done will bring about a beautiful portrait of growth in recovery.
One day at a time...
I will do the footwork by making good choices, letting each build upon the other, and I will stand back to see what God will create.
~ Sharon S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I had always believed in a Power greater than myself. I had often pondered these things. I was not an atheist. Few people really are, for that means blind faith in the strange proposition that this universe originated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. My intellectual heroes, the chemists, the astronomers, even the evolutionists, suggested vast laws and forces at work. Despite contrary indications, I had little doubt that a mighty purpose and rhythm underlay all. How could there be so much precise and immutable law, and not intelligence? I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. But that was as far as I had gone. - Pg. 10 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Everyone has the right to be wrong! That includes whatever occurs this hour--either our mistake, or another's. But we, or they, have the right to make that mistake. This is not cause for anger or guilt, just understanding.
This hour, understanding our right to be wrong will see me through. Please help me understand.
Spiritual Transformation
Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person -- respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it. Today I give and receive the gift of peace.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
If you think you are a victim of the universe, you are probably right. If you think of yourself as becoming whole from your experience, you are probably right.
I am the victor, not the victim. It took all of my past to make this person I love today.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
This is a self-help program that you can't do by yourself.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I'm willing to trust that no matter what is going on in my life, I am in the process of growth.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The elevator to sobriety is broken. Please take the steps. - Anon.
bluidkiti
09-29-2021, 10:52 AM
October 9
Daily Reflections
A SPIRITUAL AXIOM
It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is
something wrong with us.
12 & 12, p. 90
I never truly understood the Tenth Step's spiritual axiom until I had the following
experience. I was sitting in my bedroom, reading into the wee hours, when suddenly I
heard my dogs barking in the back yard. My neighbors frown on this kind of disturbance
so, with mixed feelings of anger and shame, as well as fear of my neighbor's disapproval,
I immediately called in my dogs. Several weeks later the exact situation repeated itself
but this time, because I was feeling more at peace with myself, I was able to accept the
situation--dogs will bark--and I calmly called in the dogs. Both incidents taught me that
when a person experiences nearly identical events and reacts two different ways, then it
is not the event that is of prime importance, but the person's spiritual condition. Feelings
come from inside, not from outward circumstances. When my spiritual condition is
positive, I react positively.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Am I willing to be bored sometimes at meetings? Am I willing to listen to much repetition
of A.A. principles? Am I willing to hear the same thing over and over again? Am I willing
to listen to a long blow by blow personal story, because it might help some new member?
Am I willing to sit quietly and listen to long-winded members go into every detail of their
past? Am I willing to take it, because it is doing them good to get it off their chest? My
feelings are not too important. The good of A.A. comes first, even if it is not always
comfortable for me. Have I learned to take it?
Meditation For The Day
God would draw us all closer to Him in the bonds of the spirit. He would have all people
drawn closer to each other in the bonds of the spirit. God, the great Spirit of the universe,
of which each of our own spirits is a small part, must want unity between Himself and all
His children. "Unity of the spirit in the bonds of peace." Each experience of our life, of
joy, of sorrow, of danger, of safety, of difficulty, of success, of hardship, of ease, each
should be accepted as part of our common lot, in the bonds of the spirit.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may welcome the bonds of true fellowship. I pray that I may be brought
closer to unity with God and other people.
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As Bill Sees It
Spiritually Fit, p.280
Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things
alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go
where liquor is served; we must not have it in our homes; we must
shun friends who drink; we must avoid moving pictures which show
drinking scenes; we must not go into bars; our friends must hide their
bottles if we go to their houses; we mustn't think or be reminded
about alcohol at all. Our experience shows that this is not necessarily
so.
We meet these conditions every day. An alcoholic who cannot meet
them still has an alcoholic mind; there is something the matter with
his spiritual status. His only chance for sobriety would be some place
like the Greenland icecap, and even there an Eskimo might turn up
with a bottle of Scotch and ruin everything!
Alcoholics Anonymous, p.100-101
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Walk In Dry Places
Can we tell others they are wrong?
Sharing
As we become more sensitive to others, we soon learn that it's very difficult
to tell another person he or she is wrong. Even when we struggle to be kind
and diplomatic, we can provoke an angry reaction.
We should not be surprised, because showing people they're wrong is one of
the most difficult things in human experience. Few people like to be told that
they're wrong, as we can see when our wrongs are advertised to others.
There is almost no way to directly tell people they're wrong without hurting or
offending the. Furthermore, if they are hurt or offended, they might feel less
inclined to work to correct their behavior.
If we've taken the 12 Step principles to heart, however, we learn first that we
are usually not required to tell anybody that he or she is wrong. But we can
help people simply by relating accounts of situations when we were wrong and
what we did to change. If done properly, this gives the other person the
opportunity to change without feeling resentment or humiliation.
I'll try to be as sensitive as possible to the feelings of others. I'll be especially
careful about trying to show them that they're wrong.
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Keep It Simple
A man should never be ashamed to own he was in the wrong.---Jonathan Swift
In the past, we felt a mistake was a crisis. We thought we had a to be perfect.
Our old ways was to try to hide our mistakes. We were ashamed. We thought
making mistakes meant we were bad.
Mistakes are normal. We can learn from our mistakes. They can teach us.
They can guide us. The Tenth Step directs us to promptly admit when we’re
wrong. Then, over time, we start to see mistakes as normal life events. As
we face and correct our mistakes, shame is washed away. We feel lighter.
We know it is normal to make mistakes.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see that mistakes are normal life
events. Help me promptly admit when I’m wrong.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll talk to my sponsor about mistakes I’ve made
the past week. I’ll not act ashamed of my mistakes.
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Each Day a New Beginning
When all of the remedies and all of the rhetorical armor have been dropped,
the absence of love in our lives is what makes them seem raw and unfinished.
--Ingrid Bengis
Love soothes, encourages, inspires. It enhances our wholeness, both when we
give it and when we receive it. Without the expression of love we are severed
from our family and friends. It's the bond that strengthens each of us, giving us
the courage to tackle what's lying ahead.
We need not wait for someone else's expression of love before giving it. Loving
must be unconditional. And when it is, it will be returned tenfold. Loving attracts
itself, and it will heal us, soften the hard edges of our lives, and open us up to
receive the blessings that others' gratitude will foster.
It's such a simple thing asked of us--to love one another. Unconditional love of
our sisters, our lovers, and our children breaks down the barriers to our achievements
and theirs. Loving frees us to enjoy life. It energizes us and makes all goals attainable.
We carry God's message through our love of one another.
I am charged with only one responsibility today: to love someone, dearly and wholly.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.
p. 153
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I don't remember getting home that night, and I woke up next morning completely dressed and in full makeup. I was sick as a dog, but I managed to crawl into the shower and prepare for my first college class. I sat through the entire class pleading with my eyes to the professor to let us out early. He kept us to the bell, and when it rang, I flew into the women's room, crashed into the first stall, and threw everything up.
p. 320
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Before tackling the inventory problem in detail, let's have a closer look at what the basic problem is. Simple examples like the following take on a world of meaning when we think about them. Suppose a person places sex desire ahead of everything else. In such a case, this imperious urge can destroy his chances for material and emotional security as well as his standing in the community. Another may develop such an obsession for financial security that he wants to do nothing but hoard money. Going to the extreme, he can become a miser, or even a recluse who denies himself both family and friends.
p. 43
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"If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of
humor."
--Jennifer Jones
It's not the load that breaks you down; it's the way you carry it.
--Lena Horne
"If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it!"
--From As We See It
"Criticizing anothers garden does not keep the weeds out of yours."
--Unknown
"Do you live in tomorrow when you must face today? At times, I forget to live
in the moment, but what do I miss? The setting sun, the sound of birds' singing
and, most importantly, I miss meeting myself. I am constantly changing, and if I
don't spend time with myself in the here and now, I will never get to appreciate who
I truly am because I am too busy focusing on who I want to be."
--Gary Barnes
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
HUMILITY
"I believe the first test of a
really great man is humility."
-- John Ruskin
An understanding of humility that makes sense to me is that of the man who is aware of
his limitations but still reaches for the stars.
For years I thought that humility was groveling in the dirt. Keeping quiet and acting
obsequious. Being a religious doormat for others to walk upon.
Nothing could be further from the truth! Humility is about speaking your mind, fighting
for your ideas and opinions, creating through effort, sweat and debate. The humble man's
ego is based on reality --- not fed on illusion. When he is wrong, he can admit it and is
open to the ideas of others.
Humility is based upon a realistic self-love.
O God, let me humbly rejoice in Your gift of creativity.
************************************************** *********
He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom, and broke away their chains.
Psalm 107:14
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Romans 5:1
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.
Psalm 78:7
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Daily Inspiration
When something bothers or upsets you, you can either complain about it or make peace
with it. Lord, help me promptly deal with the distractions of my day and move on to the
things that truly make my day a pleasure.
In your pursuit of happiness, pause to relax and be happy. Lord, slow me down just
enough to enjoy all that You have given to me.
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NA Just For Today
Order
"We emphasize setting our house in order because it brings us relief."
Basic Text p. 93
Focusing on what others are doing can provide momentary relief from having to take a look at ourselves. But one of the secrets of success in Narcotics Anonymous is making sure our own house is in order. So what does "setting our house in order" mean, anyway?
It means we work the steps, allowing us to look at our role in our relationships with others. When we have a problem with someone, we can take our own inventory to find out what our part in the problem has been. With the help of our sponsor, we strive to set it right. Then, each day, we continue taking our inventory to avoid repeating the same mistakes in the future.
It's pretty simple. We treat others as we would like others to treat us. We promptly make amends when we owe them. And when we turn our lives over to the care of our Higher Power on a daily basis, we can start to avoid running on the self-will so characteristic of our active addiction. Guided by a Power that seeks the best for everyone, our relationships with others will surely improve.
Just for today: I will set my own house in order. Today, I will examine my part in the problems in my life. If I owe amends, I will make them.
pg. 295
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
...but time and chance happeneth to them all. --Ecclesiastes
Life, director of the comedy, always lets things get a little out of hand. We all know what would be normal and right, but the right horse sometimes finishes last in the race, and the jerk has all the money. The wise people, like us, are ignored by all, and the good woman gets in trouble with the law. The saint cheats on his income tax, but he never gets caught the way the needy ones like us do, and the worst sinners get saved in the nick of time, while the fittest sometimes just drop dead.
If all the best-laid plans go wrong, maybe we are meant to learn that such important things aren't so important, after all.
If the skies are custard pies waiting to plop down on our hopeful faces, maybe it is best to accept the gift, count it a blessing, and lick our chops.
How have my failures been successes in disguise?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Nothing worse could happen to one than to be completely understood. --Carl Jung
We so often long to be understood. We imagine it would cure our loneliness and empty feelings. We think of it as a kind of intimacy. Yet, we may be longing for a false goal. We are each a unique man on an incomplete journey. We don't yet fully understand ourselves. There is still much mystery beneath the surface of our being. If our partners or friends completely understood us, where would we go from there? We would no longer belong to ourselves.
Perhaps we are completely understood by our Higher Power but not by another person. It is a fact of life that we continue to grow and to reveal deeper layers of ourselves. We have relationships in which we can share the mysteries as they unfold. We can talk and be understood. In communication we find our closeness and intimacy.
Today, I will remember that at the deepest level no one can fully understand me. I will communicate with others to deal with my loneliness.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
When all of the remedies and all of the rhetorical armor have been dropped, the absence of love in our lives is what makes them seem raw and unfinished. --Ingrid Bengis
Love soothes, encourages, inspires. It enhances our wholeness, both when we give it and when we receive it. Without the expression of love we are severed from our family and friends. It's the bond that strengthens each of us, giving us the courage to tackle what's lying ahead.
We need not wait for someone else's expression of love before giving it. Loving must be unconditional. And when it is, it will be returned tenfold. Loving attracts itself, and it will heal us, soften the hard edges of our lives, and open us up to receive the blessings that others' gratitude will foster.
It's such a simple thing asked of us--to love one another. Unconditional love of our sisters, our lovers, and our children breaks down the barriers to our achievements and theirs. Loving frees us to enjoy life. It energizes us and makes all goals attainable. We carry God's message through our love of one another.
I am charged with only one responsibility today: to love someone, dearly and wholly.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Self-Disclosure
Learning to gently reveal who we are is how we open ourselves up to love and intimacy in our relationships.
Many of us have hidden under a protective shell, a casing that prevents others from seeing or hurting us. We do not want to be that vulnerable. We do not want to expose our thoughts, feelings, fears, weaknesses, and sometimes our strengths, to others.
We do not want others to see who we really are.
We may be afraid they might judge us, go away, or not like us. We may be uncertain that who we are is okay or exactly how we should reveal ourselves to others.
Being vulnerable can be frightening, especially if we have lived with people who abused, mistreated, manipulated, or did not appreciate us.
Little by little, we learn to take the risk of revealing ourselves. We disclose the real person within to others. We pick safe people, and we begin to disclose bits and pieces about ourselves.
Sometimes, out of fear, we may withhold, thinking that will help the relationship or will help others like us more. That is an illusion. Withholding who we are does not help the other person, the relationship, or us. Withholding is behavior that backfires. For true intimacy and closeness to exist, for us to love ourselves and be content in a relationship, we need to disclose who we are.
That does not mean we tell all to everyone at once. That can be a self-defeating behavior too. We can learn to trust ourselves, about who to tell, when to tell, where to tell, and how much to tell.
To trust that people will love and like us if we are exactly who we are is frightening. But it is the only way we can achieve what we want in relationships. To let go of our need to control others - their opinions, their feelings about us, or the course of the relationship - is the key.
Gently, like a flower, we can learn to open up. Like a flower, we will do that when the sun shines and there is warmth.
Today, I will begin to take the risk of disclosing who I am to someone with whom I feel safe. I will let go of some of my protective devices and risk being vulnerable - even though I may have been taught differently, even though I may have taught myself differently. I will disclose who I am in a way that reflects self-responsibility, self-love, directness, and honesty. God, help me let go of my fears about disclosing who I am to people. Help me accept who I am, and help me let go of my need to be who people want me to be.
Today I'm willing to trust that no matter what is going on in my life, I am in the process of growth. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 9
The Scattered Pieces Will Come Together
Scattered pieces. Sometimes we look around, and that’s what we see. Scattered pieces of ourselves, our lives, a project, a season of our lives. Where is the connecting thread, we wonder? How can we ever pull this together into something that makes sense, something with purpose, something with meaning?
There are pieces to every whole, yet each piece is complete. Don’t worry about how they will come together. Work joyfully on the piece that’s before you, the piece that’s in your life today.
There are many pieces of you, many beautiful parts. The universe will help you bring all those parts alive. It will bring mirrors to you, people who will reflect those beautiful pieces back to you. Look in the mirror of your life. What pieces do you see reflected? Know it’s you you’re seeing. Then let that part of you come alive.
Pull in the parts of yourself, the many beautiful parts that have come alive. Beckon your warrior, your healer, your playful child. Bring together your professional self, your adult, the passionate part of you, the nurturing part. Let all the parts come together. Don’t send any of them away. You need them all. Each is a beautiful piece of the soul, the life, the person you are.
Trust. Trust the process. Joy is yours, available for the asking and the desiring– even in the developmental stages. Even before the puzzle has been put together. The scattered pieces will come together– the scattered pieces of yourself, your project, your life. The connecting thread is love.
The picture will be beautiful. Wait and see.
*****
more language of letting go
Lower your expectations
When you're starting a first creative project or beginning the study of an art or craft, what I want you to do is lower your standards until they disappear. That's right. You're not supposed to be any good at the beginning. So you might as well give yourself the liberating gift of joyously expecting yourself to be bad.
--Barbara Sheer and Annie Gotlieb, Wishcraft
When I first began writing newspaper and magazine articles, it took me anywhere from one to three months to complete a short article. After writing a few years, I brought a timer into my office one day. I told myself I knew how to do what I was doing, now I was going to learn to do it more quickly. Before long, I was able to write in two hours what had previously taken me months to accomplish. The key words here are in time.
When I first began recovering from chemical dependency, it took me eight months of treatment to understand what other people were comprehending in six weeks. In time, I became a chemical dependency counselor. In time, I wrote books on the subject. The key words here are in time.
When I first began recovering from codependency, I couldn't tell a control gesture from setting a boundary. I didn't know when I was taking care of myself or what that even meant. I didn't know manipulation from an honest attempt at expressing my emotions. In time, I wrote a best-seller on the subject. Again, the key words are in time.
Start where you are. Start poorly. Just begin. Let yourself fumble, be awkward and confused. If you already knew how to do it, it wouldn't be a lesson in your life. And you wouldn't get the thrill of victory two, five, or ten years from now when you look back and say, "Wow. I've gotten good at that over time."
All things are possible to him or her that believeth, the Bible says. Enjoy those awkward beginnings. Revel in them. They're the key to your success.
God, help me stop putting off living out of fear of dong it poorly. Help me lower my expectations to allow room for awkward beginnings.
Activity: What have you been putting off or avoiding out of fear of beginning badly? Make a list of each accomplishment you have, whether it's graduating from elementary school or college, learning a new skill at a job, or being a parent. Then, write in your journal about how it felt in the beginning. Now, make a list of the things you want to do. Next to your goal, write these words to yourself: I give you permission to do this poorly in the beginning. Document your performance each time you attempt that goal. Keep coming back to this section of your journal until you find yourself logging how well you did.
*****
Answering The Call
Taking Responsibility For Your Destiny
There are those of us who believe that our lives are predestined and that we should resign ourselves to our lots in life. Yet the truth is that it is up to each one of us to decide what that destiny will be. While each of us is born with a life purpose, it is up to us whether or not we will say yes to fulfilling it. And just like when we choose what to eat, who to keep company with, and whether to turn right or left when we leave our home everyday, choosing to say yes to your destiny is a decision that can only be realized when you take action to make that choice a reality.
Whether you believe it is your destiny to be a parent, an adventurer, an artist, a pioneer, or a spiritual guru, saying yes to your destiny is only the first step. While manifesting your destiny starts with knowing what you want and believing you can attain your goals, there are then the actions that must be taken and the decisions to be made before your destiny can truly happen. When you take responsibility for fulfilling your destiny and begin acting with the intention of doing so, you not only take fate into your own hands, but also you become the hands of your own fate. Doorways inevitably open for you to step through, and every choice you make can be a creative act toward realizing your goals and dreams. You begin to follow your instincts and intuition, recognize opportunities when they are presented to you, and seize those golden moments. You also begin to recognize the decisions that may not serve this greater picture and can more easily push them aside.
Remembering that the decision to fulfill your destiny is always a choice can be empowering. Knowing you are fulfilling your destiny because you want to, rather than because you have to, can make a huge difference. When you are freed from obligation, obstacles in your way become challenges to be overcome, and the journey becomes an adventure rather than the obligatory steps you are being forced to take. Your destiny may be waiting for you, but whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you. Your fate is in your hands.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I remember once hearing someone in The Program say, “Life is a series of agreeing or disagreeing with the universe.” There is much truth in that statement, for I’m only a small cog in the machinery of the universe. When I try to run things my way, I’ll experience only frustration and a sense of failure. If, instead, I learn to let go, success will assuredly be mine. Then I’ll have time to count my blessings, work on my shortcomings, and live fully and richly in The Now. Do I believe that what I am meant to know will come to my knowledge if I practice the Eleventh Step — praying only for the knowledge of God’s will for me and the power to carry that out?
Today I Pray
May I take my direction from the Eleventh Step — and not fall into my usual habit of making itemized list for god of all my pleas and entreaties and complaints. May I no longer second-guess God with my specific solutions, but pray only that His will be done. May I count my blessings instead of my beseeching.
Today I Will Remember
Stop list-making for God.
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One More Day
Bitterness and anger seem to be very closely related and are interchangeable words for the same emotion.
– Robert Lovering
Bitterness and anger don’t arrive out of the blue when there is a health change. Chronic illness doesn’t cause these reactions, but it may bring these and other feelings to light.
If negative emotions and attitudes cause us pain or embarrassment, if we are unhappy with ourselves, it may be time to take a personal inventory. How do we act toward other people? What do we expect? Do we create our own problems?
We can change negative into positives, but it requires time and great emotional effort. Our attitudes do improve when we want to change, when we’re willing to grow, and when we’re patient with ourselves.
I can begin today to change my negative emotions by admitting them and asking for the help I need.
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Food For Thought
Abstinence, Not Punishment
By abstaining from compulsive overeating, we are doing ourselves the biggest favor imaginable. We are literally saving our lives, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. We should never think of abstinence as punishment. Eating too much food and the wrong kind of food was the real punishment.
Each day we plan three attractive meals consisting of foods, which we enjoy. We do not exaggerate our efforts to make the meals enjoyable, since we do not want to reactivate our former obsession with food. At the same time, we choose foods, which appeal to us and do not punish ourselves with boring, unappetizing menus.
The refined sugars and carbohydrates with which we rewarded ourselves in the past are no longer a reward but poison to our systems. Overeating any food punishes us through loss of both control and peace of mind. We maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating in order to take care of ourselves and feel good.
By Your grace, may I maintain abstinence.
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One Day At A Time
BALANCE SHEET
“It is amazing what you can accomplish if
you do not care who gets the credit.”
Harry S. Truman
Before I came to OA, I kept an emotional account of all my positive actions. I didn't really do that many good things, but the few I did were meant to show how great and kind I was. I even “wrote down” smiles, talking politely, giving a hand in the house, or filling in at work. I expected a great reward one day for all of my good actions ~ especially considering all of the things I put up with. I wanted people to speak well of me. I wanted people to grieve in great sorrow at my funeral for losing the fantastic person I was. Because I felt I never got back half of what I had put into this balance sheet, my resentments started to block me from acting nicely. Why help out, when nobody ever does anything for me? I didn't have an honest focus on reality. I felt worn out, bitter, used and angry. Why was I never paid what I deserved?
I learned in OA that I have a terminal disease which will kill me sooner or later -- if I do not change my thinking and acting. I am powerless over this disease. The only thing I can do is to admit I’m powerless and surrender. As I see it, this disease is the primary reason I have gotten into trouble all my life. I am self-centered, bitter, immature and insecure. Before I entered these rooms, I didn't know how to have a real friend, or brush my teeth on a daily basis. In this program, I learned that I am worthy, loveable, and an ordinary woman -- with my positive and negative sides -- just like everyone else. When I am accountable today to God as I understand him, I do not need an emotional balance sheet. I do not need to grow bitter or hate other people.
One day at a time...
Because I have so generously been given a new life in this program, I choose to give service to my homegroup and to give time and patience to my sponsees. I choose to give of myself, for that does not have a price, in money or in diplomas. I no longer need the credit for what I give.
~ Trine
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Some of us have been violently anti-religious. To others, the word 'God' brought up a particular idea of Him with which someone had tried to impress them during childhood. Perhaps we rejected this particular conception because it seemed inadequate. With this rejection we imagined we had abandoned the God idea entirely. We were bothered with the thought that faith and dependence upon a Power beyond ourselves was somewhat weak, even cowardly. We look upon this world of warring individuals, warring theological systems, and inexplicable calamity, with deep skepticism. We looked askance at many individuals who claimed to be godly. How could a Supreme Being have anything to do with it all? And who could comprehend a Supreme Being anyhow? Yet, in other moments, we found ourselves thinking, when enchanted by a starlit night, 'Who, then, made all this?' There was a feeling of awe and wonder, but it was fleeting and soon lost. - Pgs. - 45-46 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Our freedom lies in recognizing the threefold illusion of this disease--mind (I can handle it), desire (it feels good), and flesh (I need it). These are all illusions which we soon will be liberated from.
May I surrender my illusions about the 'goodness' of mind affecting chemicals for myself and any addict / alcoholic.
Forgiveness
Today, I am willing to take a leap of faith into a process of forgiveness. My willingness to consider forgiveness as an option says that I want more out of life and relationships, that I am engaged and alive. I am willing to feel, to love and be loved. This implies that I value myself more than I value winning, prevailing or revenge. Forgiveness is the ultimate statement of self-love. If I love myself I don't want to do things to hurt myself. Some things aren't within my control but forgiveness is. I can't always make sure I don't get hurt but I can have much to say about how I react to getting hurt.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Life is too short to spend it miserable. An excellent way to abate misery is to look at what you are blessed with. Unclench your angry fist, hold it up, and use your fingers to name five things you are grateful for.
(P.S. we mean now!)
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
People in our fellowships who think they are too big to do little things are perhaps too little to be asked to do big things.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am learning to trust that no matter what is going on in my life, I am in the process of growth.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I didn't know how you could see that I was a newcomer. The fact that I'd been wearing the same dress for a week might have been a little tip-off. And that I came in festooned with jewelry, and had gobs and gobs of make-up on - which I didn't take off at night - I was like Elizabeth the First, I just put more and more on every day. - Lorna K.
bluidkiti
10-04-2021, 06:28 AM
October 10
Daily Reflections
FIXING ME, NOT YOU
If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 90
What a freedom I felt when this passage was pointed out to me!
Suddenly I saw that I could do something about my anger, I could
fix me, instead of trying to fix them. I believe that there are
no exceptions to the axiom. When I am angry, my anger is always
self-centered. I must keep reminding myself that I am human, that
I am doing the best I can, even when that best is sometimes poor.
So I ask God to remove my anger and truly set me free.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When new members come into my A.A. group, do I make a special
effort to make them feel at home? Do I put myself out to listen
to them, even if their ideas of A.A. are vague? Do I make it a
habit to talk to all new members myself, or do I often leave
that to someone else? I may not be able to help them, but, then,
again it may be something that I might say that would put them
on the right track. When I see any members sitting alone, do I
put myself out to be nice to them, or do I stay among my own
special group of friends and leave them out in the cold? Are all
new A.A.s my responsibility?
Meditation For The Day
You are God's servant. Serve Him cheerfully and readily.
Nobody likes a servant who avoids extra work, who complains
about being called from one task to do any less enjoyable. A
master would feel that he was being ill served by such a servant.
But is that not how you so often serve God? View your day's work
in this light. Try to do your day's work in this light. Try to do
your day's work the way you believe God wants you to do it, never
shirking any responsibility and often going out of your way to be
of service.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be a good servant.
I pray that I may be willing to go out of my way to be of service.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Ourselves as Individuals, p.281
There is only one sure test of all spiritual experiences: "By their
fruits, ye shall know them."
This is why I think we should question no one's
transformation--whether it be sudden or gradual. Nor should we
demand anyone's special type for ourselves, because experience
suggests that we are apt to receive whatever may be the most useful
for our own needs.
**********************************
Human beings are never quite alike, so each of us, when making
an inventory, will need to determine what his individual character
defects are. Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into
them and walk with new confidence that he is at last on the right
track.
1. Grapevine, July 1963
2. Twelve and Twelve, p.48
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Walk In Dry Places
Putting our trust in people.
Trust
How much should we trust other people? This is an important question, because many of us have erred in both directions: we've trusted people too much or not enough.
We can find our answer in the spiritual side of the program. We do have a Higher Power in whom we can have absolute trust. We can have little doubt that the spiritual presence behind everything is infallible and supreme.
As human beings, we know that we can only be trusted in certain ways. We can work to develop our trustworthiness, but it is never high enough, even with the strongest souls. All of us have weaknesses that can keep us from being what we know to be our best.
In our 12 Step living, we should work to develop trust in both ourselves and others, but no be hurt or disappointed when things go wrong. Above all, our real trust should be in our Higher Power.
I'll work today to be trusting and trustworthy, but I'll not expect too much of anybody, including myself.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
The foolish and the dead never change their opinions.---James Russell Lowell
We need to stay fresh in our program. We need to be open to new ideas. We need change. The ways we work the Steps should change for us as the years go by. And as we grow, more of the fog of our denial clears away. Then we see the world and our program in different ways.
We need to allow this to happen. At times, it’s scary to give up old ways and old opinions, but this is what allows new growth. Every day, we wake up to a new world. Being alive means change. Opinions and ideas are like a strong tree: the base is strong, but leaves change with the seasons.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me stay fresh and alive. Help me stay open to new ideas and attitudes.
Help me to not become rigid.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll ask two friends to tell me how I may be rigid. I will listen to what they say.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose. --Billie Holiday
Our struggles with other people always take their toll on us. They often push us to behavior we're not proud of. They may result in irreparable rifts. They frequently trigger an emotional relapse. No battle is worth the damage to the psyche that nearly any battle can cause. Nonresistance is the safer way to chart our daily course.
Bowing with the wind, flowing with the tide, eases the steps we need to take, the steps that will carry us to our personal fulfillment. Part of the process of our growth is learning to slide past the negative situations that confront us, coming to understand that we are in this life to fulfill a unique purpose. The many barriers that get in our way can strengthen our reliance on God if we'll let them. People or situations need never thwart us. We will profit from taking all experiences in our stride. The course we travel is the one we chart. The progress we make toward our life goals is proportionate to the smoothness of our steps.
I will flow with the tide. It will assuredly move me closer to my destination.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
In the chapter “Working With Others” you gathered an idea of how we approach and aid others to health. Suppose now that through you several families have adopted this way of life. You will want to know more of how to proceed from that point. Perhaps the best way of treating you to a glimpse of your future will be to describe the growth or the fellowship among us. Here is a brief account:
Years ago, in 1935, one of our number made a journey to a certain western city. From a business standpoint, his trip came off badly. Had he been successful in his enterprise, he would have been set on his feet financially which, at the time, seemed vitally important. But his venture would up in a law suit and bogged down completely. The proceeding was shot through with much hard feeling and controversy.
pp. 153-154
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
The insanity of the disease had already manifested itself. I recall thinking, as I knelt retching in the stall, that this was fantastic. Life was great; I had finally found the answer--alcohol! Yes, I overdid it the night before, but I was new to this game. I only had to learn how to drink right and I was set.
p. 320
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Nor is the quest for security always expressed in terms of money. How frequently we see a frightened human being determined to depend completely upon a stronger person for guidance and protection. This weak one, failing to meet life's responsibilities with his own resources, never grows up. Disillusionment and helplessness are his lot. In time all his protectors either flee or die, and he is once more left alone and afraid.
p. 43
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Do not be wise in words - be wise in deeds.
--Jewish Proverb
Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Your family and your love must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort, and
imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and
growing."
--Jim Rohn
"If you raise your children to feel that they can accomplish any goal or task they decide
upon, you will have succeeded as a parent and you will have given your children one of
the greatest of all blessings."
--Brian Tracy
"Wanting what I don't have keeps me from having what I do have."
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
TOLERANCE
"Art, if it is to be reckoned with
as one of the great values of life,
must teach men . . . tolerance."
-- Somerset Maugham
There is something about art that is accepting, tolerant and reconcilable with
"difference". I have observed that artists --- those who paint, write, dance, sculpture,
design --- are also people who are accepting and tolerant because they need the
"different" in order to create and progress. Things cannot stay the same and art is the
recorder of man's journey towards the truth; but mankind needs friction, argument,
confrontation, rejection --- yes, "difference" in order to grow and develop.
People say that artists are crazy, and I suppose this is true. But we need crazy people to
take the world where it needs to go. In the crazy, the seed of genius is often buried.
Lord, before I reject the artist or the "crazy", let me seriously consider the message.
************************************************** *********
Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures forever.
Psalm 136 : 1
"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is
freedom."
2 Corinthians 3:17
" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Phillipians 4:13
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Daily Inspiration
Most often a gentle approach is the best resolution to a conflict. Lord, I have been given today to improve myself and make life better for others. Help me walk in the way that You lead me.
Live your life as though today was your last and learn as though you'll live forever. Lord, You ask so little of the talents You have given to me. May I not neglect them.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Consequences
"Before we got clean, most of our actions were guided by impulse. Today, we are not locked into this type of thinking."
Basic Text p. 87
Ever been tempted to do something even when you knew the results would be disastrous? Ever thought about how much it was going to hurt to do what you were tempted to do, then proceed to do it anyway?
It is said that there are consequences to every action. Before we got clean, many of us simply didn't believe this. But now we know exactly what it means. When we act, we know there will be consequences to pay. No longer can we decide to do something in ignorance when we know full well that we won't like the price we'll have to pay.
There's a prize and a price. It's okay to act despite the consequences if we're willing to pay the price, but there's always one to pay.
Just for today: I will think about the consequences of my actions before I take them.
pg. 296
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Look, the wind vane fluttering in the autumn breeze
Takes hold of certain things that cannot be held. --Feng Chih
When we think we are losing our grip, we have good reason to look up. Consider the moon suspended in the sky, how it continues to come and go, follows its natural law, and never really loses face. Consider the sun, the stars, the seasons, how they refuse to abandon us, to let go of their hold on our lives. And come closer to home. We can marvel at the magic of small efficient things--the toaster and stove, the light in the room, the words in a good book that are permanent, faithful, and clear. We can consider how music, without saying a word, still speaks to us, and how a few friends, maybe miles away, continue to hang on to the strength of our small and faithful words.
We can keep in mind that we are part of a complex and loving system, and our grip can never be lost.
How do I see my unity with my surroundings today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitudes. --Victor Frankl
When we stand and look at a mountain, it looks awesome, majestic, and perhaps intimidating. To climb the mountain we will need to select a route. Which approach will give us success? Which will provide a beautiful view? Which is safest? What are the rewards and trade offs among the paths available?
In our lives, we usually cannot choose the mountains that face us, but we can choose the best paths to approach them. One path may be a very negative attitude. It may feel safe like a narrow, protected passageway. It is predictable, but it keeps us cut off from others. Another path may be filled with too many self-indulgent pleasures and never progress in any direction. Another path may be hard and include some risks, but it allows us to be in contact with others and to appreciate the beauty along the way. When we make positive choices about our attitudes, although the mountain is challenging, we are liberated to become the kind of men we're meant to be.
Today, I will choose friendly attitudes toward myself that will help me on my journey.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose. --Billie Holiday
Our struggles with other people always take their toll on us. They often push us to behavior we're not proud of. They may result in irreparable rifts. They frequently trigger an emotional relapse. No battle is worth the damage to the psyche that nearly any battle can cause. Nonresistance is the safer way to chart our daily course.
Bowing with the wind, flowing with the tide, eases the steps we need to take, the steps that will carry us to our personal fulfillment. Part of the process of our growth is learning to slide past the negative situations that confront us, coming to understand that we are in this life to fulfill a unique purpose. The many barriers that get in our way can strengthen our reliance on God if we'll let them. People or situations need never thwart us. We will profit from taking all experiences in our stride. The course we travel is the one we chart. The progress we make toward our life goals is proportionate to the smoothness of our steps.
I will flow with the tide. It will assuredly move me closer to my destination.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Payoffs from Destructive Relationships
Sometimes it helps to understand that we may be receiving a payoff from relationships that cause us distress.
The relationship may be feeding into our helplessness or our martyr role.
Maybe the relationships feeds our need to be needed, enhancing our self-esteem by allowing us to feel in control or morally superior to the other person.
Some of us feel alleviated from financial or other kinds of responsibility by staying in a particular relationship.
"My father sexually abused me when I was a child," said one woman. "I went on to spend the next twenty years blackmailing him emotionally and financially on this. I could get money from him whenever I wanted, and I never had to take financial responsibility for myself."
Realizing that we may have gotten a codependent payoff from a relationship is not a cause for shame. It means we are searching out the blocks in ourselves that may be stopping our growth.
We can take responsibility for the part we may have played in keeping ourselves victimized. When we are willing to look honestly and fearlessly at the payoff and let it go, we will find the healing we've been seeking. We'll also be ready to receive the positive, healthy payoffs available in relationships, the payoffs we really want and need.
Today, I will be open to looking at the payoffs I may have received from staying in unhealthy relationships, or from keeping destructive systems operating. I will become ready to let go of my need to stay in unhealthy systems; I am ready to face myself.
Today I will do something very special just for me. I will treat myself to something I want to have or do and feel good about myself while I do it. My life is very important to me and I have the right to be happy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 10
We Are Transmitters and Receivers
We are a finely tuned instrument– body, mind, and soul. We receive messages, we receive guidance. And we transmit energy– the energy of love.
When we become off center, we become like two-way radios whose tuners aren’t on the right frequency. We aren’t receiving or transmitting clearly. We hear and feel the static. Often, instinctively, that’s when we start broadcasting more loudly, sometimes screaming to be heard. Now is not the time to crank up the volume.
Take the time you need to get centered, to get peaceful. What do you need to do? What do you need to feel? What healing resources do you need to utilize? What’s your voice, your quiet, trustworthy inner voice, the one that speaks through your heart, urging you to do?
Taking time to get centered and peaceful isn’t selfish. It’s not a waste of time. When we’re receiving clearly, we transmit clearly.
And the frequency we use is love.
*****
more language of letting go
See how it feels to do it right
In skydiving, there's an activity called dirt diving. At the drop zone, you'll see people lying on their bellies on contraptions that look like skateboards. They make all the moves on the ground as if they were free-falling through the air. They're training their bodies and themselves to do it right. They're experiencing how it feels to do it right.
Do you have something you're trying to learn how to do? Are you struggling to let go of someone? Are you trying to do something for the first time-- conquer your fear of flying or write a book? Do you have a meeting scheduled that's causing you some strain? Maybe you need to approach your boss and ask for a raise.
See yourself doing it. Quiet yourself first by deliberately relaxing each part of your body and mind. Then imagine yourself doing it, whatever it is. See how it feels to do it right. Go into each detail of how you would feel if you were doing it right.
If you encounter a block that keeps you from moving forward smoothly in your visualization time, ask your Higher Power or yourself how to remedy or release that block. Do you have a fear that's blocking you? Is it new or an old fear? Maybe it's concern over what somebody told you long ago about your inadequacy. Release that energy, then start all over again, seeing what it feels like to do it right. Keep at your visualization until you can go through the entire process smoothly, from beginning to end.
If you try but can't imagine yourself doing something, much less see how it feels to do it right, maybe you're trying to do something that's not right for you. Ask your Higher Power for guidance about that,too.
Visualization can give us time to safely dirt-dive and work through awkwardness, fears, and potential blocks and problems. Sometimes spending quiet time trying to visualize how it feels to do it right can give us a message that either this is or isn't the right time or thing for us.
God, help me use my mental powers to create the most positive scenes I can imagine taking place in my life.
*****
Best Friends
A Warm Refuge by Madisyn Taylor
Our best friends are a warm refuge in which we feel free to be fully ourselves.
By the time we reach adulthood, many of us have had the good fortune to have at least one best friend. If we have moved around or changed our life situation repeatedly, we may be lucky enough to have had several. The best friend relationship is often our earliest intimate peer relationship, and it can be a source of great warmth and connection throughout our lives. The details of best friendship change as we grow up and grow older, but the heart of it remains the same. Our best friends are a warm refuge in which we feel free to be fully ourselves, to share our deepest secrets, to rest when we are tired, to celebrate when we are happy—a place in which we feel utterly welcome to give and receive that most precious of all gifts, love.
Most intimate relationships hit bumps from time to time, and one of the hallmarks of an enduring best friendship is its ability to ride out the turbulence and remain intact even as it faces changes. Our best friends are those who manage to love us through all of our transitions, as we do the same for them. We find ways to embrace and appreciate the differences that set us apart and offer love and support no matter what. We allow each other to be exactly as we are at a given moment, even as we allow each other to change over time. In this way, best friends sometimes feel like family. We know we will stick together regardless of where our individual paths lead.
We may be on the phone with our best friends every day, or we may not have spoken for a year, yet we know that our bond will be strong and immediate when we do connect. This bond ties us together even when we are apart and draws us blissfully back into the warm refuge of each other’s company when our paths bring us together again.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we allow our Higher Power to take charge, without reservations on our part, we stop being “anxious.” When we’re not anxious about some person or situation, that doesn’t mean we’re disinterested or have stopped caring. Just the opposite is true. We can be interested and caring without being anxious or fearful. The poised, calm and faith-filled person brings something positive to every situation. He or she is able to do the things that are necessary and helpful. Do I realize how much better prepared I am to do wise and loving things if I banish anxious thoughts and know that God is in charge?
Today I Pray
I pray that I may be rid of the anxiety which I have equated in my mind with really caring about people. May I know that anxiety is not an item of outerwear that can be doffed like a cap. May I know that I must have serenity within myself and confidence that God can do a better job that I can — and then my anxiety will lessen.
Today I Will Remember
Anxiety never solved anything.
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One More Day
But if a man happens to find himself … he has a mansion which he can inhabit with dignity all the days of his life.
– James Michener
If only, we think, I could regain that joy, that feeling of being so pleased with myself that I had as a child. if we think about it, we might decide that the child didn’t disappear; it may still be waiting to be freed once again.
We can pause and look at what we have become as adults. If we see self-worth by pleasing or impressing others, we may have stopped listening to that childlike voice that tells us to trust ourselves. Dignity, self-worth, contentment — these things grow out of a sense of self, not from the opinions of others.
The choices I make today will be based on my own values.
************************************
Food For Thought
Powerless
I am powerless over food. By myself, I am unable to control what I eat or manage my life. Thanks to OA, I have found a Higher Power by which I am learning to live a new life.
So that this Higher Power may live in me, I surrender myself. No longer do I try to live by my own efforts; no longer do I try by myself to control what I eat. Since I am powerless over food and cannot manage my life, I give myself to God as I understand Him and ask that He live through me.
When I surrender, my Higher Power takes over. Then, instead of being weak and powerless, I become strong through His strength. So very simple. I wonder why it takes so long to learn? The only requirement is, in the words of T.S. Eliot, "a condition of complete simplicity, costing not less than everything."
May I remember that without You I am powerless.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
TOLERANCE
“I have learned silence from the talkative,
toleration from the intolerant, and kindness
from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful
to those teachers.”
Khalil Gibran
Two of my biggest character defects are arrogance and fear. I used to have a hard time tolerating people who are not like me. When I was driven by fear, anger, and shame, I believed they threatened my social position. A normal day for me was filled with frustration and anger at people I didn’t like. Gossip was my language.
After I decided that I was truly powerless over my addiction and that my life had become really unmanageable, I surrendered. I started writing the suggested Step work and had a great awakening. In the 4th Step inventory, I came to the conclusion that I did not like “different people” because I was afraid to be like them. And what were they like? Just like me. I didn't like myself. That was one of the most revealing acknowledgements that were given to me. I have no reason to pick a fight anymore, nor discuss or judge any person. When I meet people I do not like, I know why.
One day at a time...
My greatest teachers are those who have shown me what I do not like or accept about myself. I understand that I would never have appreciated these lessons as precious gifts without the understanding, growth and tolerance within the 12 Step fellowship. Today I make a living amend by never judging or disliking any person. Every human being is a creature of God as I understand him, and who am I to judge?
~ Trine
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Live and let live is the rule. If you both show a willingness to remedy your own defects, there will be little need to criticize each other. - Pg. 118 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We must always fan the flame of inspiration and enthusiasm or our slight hold on sobriety will flicker and fade. We fan the flame by going to meetings, listening to the professionals we hire, choose and use a sponsor, and we must help others.
God, as I understand You, please show me one person I can give an encouraging word to in this hour.
My Interaction with My World
I elicit a particular response from the world about how it sees me based on what I'm putting out there. I get a response, then I take in that information, process it well or badly, consciously or unconsciously, and it becomes a part of me. A part of my wiring psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. Who I am is a product of who I am. Those of us who had great starts in life are lucky, but all of us can do a lot about who we are, and forgiveness is one of those tools that has the power to transform our lives. There's much more to it than meets the eye, more work and more benefit.
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Recovery is the easier, softer way.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will do something very special just for me. I will treat myself to something I want to have or do and feel good about myself while I do it. My life is very important to me and I have the right to be happy.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Us looking for God is like a fish looking for water. David C.
bluidkiti
10-04-2021, 06:29 AM
October 11
Daily Reflections
SELF--RESTRAINT
Our first objective will be the development of self-restraint.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 91
My drive to work provides me with an opportunity for self-examination.
One day while making this trip, I began to review my progress in
sobriety, and was not happy with what I saw. I hoped that, as the
work day progressed, I would forget these troublesome thoughts,
but as one disappointment after another kept coming, my discontent
only increased, and the pressures within me kept mounting. I
retreated to an isolated table in the lounge, and asked myself
how I could make the most of the rest of the day. In the past,
when things went wrong, I instinctively wanted to fight back.
But during the short time I had been trying to live the A.A.
program I had learned to step back and take a look at myself.
I recognized that, although I was not the person I wanted to be,
I had learned to not react in my old ways. Those old patterns of
behavior only brought sorrow and hurt, to me and to others. I
returned to my work station, determined to make the day a
productive one, thanking God for the chance to make progress
that day.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
How good a sponsor am I? When I bring new members to a meeting,
do I feel that my responsibility has ended? Or do I make it my
job to stay with them until they have either become good members
of A.A. or have found another sponsor? If they don't show up for
a meeting, do I say to myself: "Well they've had it put up to
them, so if they don't want it, there's nothing more I can do? "
Or do I look them up and find out whether there is a reason for
their absences or that they don't want A.A.? Do I go out of my
way to find out if there is anything more I can do to help? Am I a good sponsor?
Meditation For The Day
"First be reconciled to your brother and then come and offer
your gift to God." First I must get right with other people and
then I can get right with God. If I hold a resentment against
someone, which I find it very difficult to overcome, I should
try to put something else constructive into my mind. I should
pray for the one against whom I hold the resentment. I should
put that person in God's hands and let God show him or her the
way to live. "If a man say: 'I love God' and hateth his brother,
he is a liar, for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath
seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?"
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may see something good in every person, even one I
dislike, and that I may let God develop the good in that person.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
INSTINCTS RUN WILD, p. 282
Every time a person imposes his instincts unreasonably upon others,
unhappiness follows. If the pursuit of wealth tramples upon people who
happen to be in the way, then anger, jealousy, and revenge are likely
to be aroused. If sex runs riot, there is similar uproar.
Demands made upon other people for too much attention, protection,
and love can invite only domination or revulsion in the protectors
themselves-two emotions quite as unhealthy as the demands
which evoked them. When an individual's desire for prestige
becomes uncontrollable, whether in the sewing circle or at the
international conference table, other people suffer and often
revolt. This collision of instincts can produce anything from a cold snub
to a blazing revolution.
TWELVE AND TWELVE, p. 44
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Keeping anger in safe limits
Dealing with anger
"The most heated bit of letter-writing can be a wonderful safety valve,"
AA co-founder, Bill W. said, "providing the wastebasket is somewhere nearby."
This is a delightful bit of advice about the right way to handle anger.
Writing an angry letter is at least a way of bringing our feelings out so
that we can see them. This is far healthier than the peculiar method of
"Stuffing" one's feelings and pretending that there was no hurt or offense.
But an angry letter, once mailed, can be more destructive than a bullet.
We may live to regret ever having mailed it. It could have unintended
consequences of the worst kind.
That's why the wastebasket becomes the second hand way to deal with
our anger. We throw the letter away and let time and wisdom heal the
matter. What usually happen under the guidance of our Higher Power
is that we find a much more satisfactory way of settling whatever has happened.
If I become angry today, I'll admit it to myself. Perhaps I'll even put my
feelings on paper. But I'll have the good sense not to go further with such outbursts.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
May you live all the days of your life. ---Jonathan Swift
The truth is, life hard. Accepting this fact will make it easier. Remember
how well it worked in Step One? Once we admitted and that we were
powerless over alcohol and other drugs, we were given the power to recover.
It works the same with life’s problems.
We can spend a lot of energy trying to avoid life’s hardships. But our program
teaches us to use the same energy to solve our problems. Problems are chances
to better ourselves and become more spiritual. We have a choice: we can either
use our energy to avoid problems, or we can face them. When we stop wasting
energy, we start to feel more sure of ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, life is to be lived, both the easy and the hard
parts. Help me face and learn from it all.
Action for the Day: I’ll work at not complaining about how hard life is. I’ll take
the same energy and us it to solve problems I may face.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Be still and listen to the stillness within. --Darlene Larson Jenks
No answer eludes us if we turn to the source of all answers--the stillness within.
Prayer accompanied by meditation will always provide the answers we need for
the situations facing us. The answers we want are not guaranteed, however. We
must trust that we will be directed to take the right steps. Our well being is
assured if we let go of the control and turn our wills over to the care of God,
our messenger within.
How comforting to know that all answers are as close as our quiet moments. God
never chooses to keep them from us. We simply fail to quiet our thoughts long
enough to heed them. Our minds race, obsessively, all too often. We jump from
one scenario to another, one fear to another, and one emotion to another. And
each time our thoughts capture a new focus; we push the answer we seek further
into the background.
The process is simple, if I want to follow it. The answers await me if I truly want
them. I need only sit quietly and ask God to offer the guidance I need. And then
I will sit quietly some more.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke. Still physically weak, and sober but a few months, he saw that his predicament was dangerous. He wanted so much to talk with someone, but whom?
One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby wondering how his bill was to be paid. At the end of the room stood a glass covered directory of local churches. Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would find companionship and release. Unless he took some drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an acquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was the old, insidious insanity—that first drink. With a shiver, he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
p. 154
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I attempted to "drink right" for the next eight years. My progression was phenomenal; there is absolutely no period in my drinking career that can be described as social drinking. I blacked out almost every time I put alcohol in my system, but I decided I could live with that; it was a small price to pay for the power and confidence alcohol gave me. After drinking for less than six months, I was almost a daily drinker.
pp. 320-321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
We have also seen men and women who go power-mad, who devote themselves to attempting to rule their fellows. These people often throw to the winds every chance for legitimate security and a happy family life. Whenever a human being becomes a battleground for the instincts, there can be no peace.
pp. 43-44
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A clear conscience is a good pillow.
--American Proverb
"It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get back up." --Vince Lombardi
There are risks and costs to a program of action, but they are far less than the long-range
risks and costs of comfortable inaction.
--John F. Kennedy
The first service one owes to others in the fellowship consists in listening to them. Just as
love of God begins in listening to His Word, so the beginning of love for the brethren is
learning to listen to them. It is God's love for us that He not only gives us His Word but
lends us His ear. So it is His work that we do for our brother when we learn to
listen to him.
--Dietrich Bonhoeffer (1906-1945), Life Together
"Often we seek to grow or change ourselves by adjusting the external aspects of our lives. ...
We all too often forget that permanent or real change only comes when the center of our
being, our inner drives and motivations, undergoes transformation."
--Errol Strider
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ART
"Art is not a thing; it is a way."
-- Elbert Hubbard
In the spiritual twelve-step program it talks about "...a God as you understand Him."
This is a liberating concept that teaches us to risk and think "big". God is not only found
in churches, temples and rituals --- God can be found in the myriad of art forms. God is
always to be found in the creative. Because art is always concerned with life and truth,
God is always involved.
Today I am able to look for God in His or Her World.
In my recovery from the disease of addiction I need to discover the wonder and splendor
of life that got damaged in my drinking days. Art can help me to feel again. It helps me to
think and be concerned again. Art teaches me to be involved in life.
Thank You for the artist --- another aspect of priesthood.
************************************************** *********
I will praise you O lord with all my heart.
Psalm 138 : 1
"Every word of God is pure; He is a shield to those who put their
trust in Him."
Proverbs 30:5
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Daily Inspiration
Weeds grow easily, but flowers need care and nurturing to bloom. Lord, may I turn away
from evil and tenderly encourage the goodness that comes my way so that I, too, may blossom.
Never doubt the power, the wisdom and the love that God has for you. Lord, thank You for
Your constant care and the certainty of Your love for me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Eyeglasses And Attitudes
"Our best thinking got us into trouble.... Recovery is an active change in our ideas and attitudes."
Basic Text p.53
In active addiction, the world probably looked like a horrible place. Using helped us tolerate the world we saw. Today, however, we understand that the world's condition wasn't really the problem. It was our ideas and attitudes about the world that made it impossible for us to find a comfortable place in it.
Our attitudes and our ideas are the eyeglasses through which we see our lives. If our "glasses" are smudged or dirty, our lives look dim. If our attitudes aren't well focused, the whole world appears distorted. To see the world clearly, we need to keep our attitudes and ideas clean, free of things like resentment, denial, self-pity, and closed-mindedness. To insure our vision of life is in focus, we have to bring our ideas in line with reality.
In addiction, our best thinking kept us from clearly seeing either the world or our part in it. Recovery serves to correct the prescriptions in our attitudinal eyewear. By stripping away our denial and replacing it with faith, self-honesty, humility, and responsibility, the steps help us see our lives in a whole new way. Then the steps help us keep our spiritual lenses clean, encouraging us to regularly examine our ideas our attitudes, and our actions.
Today, seen through the clean lenses of faith and recovery the world looks like a warm, inviting place to live.
Just for today: I will view the world and my life through the clean spiritual lenses of my program.
pg. 297
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A musician must make music; an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. --Abraham Maslow
The same is true of a seamstress, carpenter, homemaker, lawyer, or mechanic. The question is, Who and what am I? What must I do to be at peace with myself? What can I be, for that is what I must be?
A lucky few of us find the answers to these questions fairly early in life, and we work to develop into the people we can be and must be. We do that by looking at our deepest desires, and ask what would bring fulfillment for us. We ask what we would enjoy doing most, what we believe we have the ability to be really good at. What is it that sometimes burns within us to be expressed or done? The answers to what we can be, what we must be, come from within, through asking ourselves these questions.
What kind of a person am I capable of being?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
What is most beautiful in virile men is something feminine; what is most beautiful in feminine women is something masculine. --Susan Sontag
In recovery, we grow in many ways and become more comfortable with the many subtle colors in our personalities. We have a greater range of all human qualities available to us now. We are more light and playful at times and more serious at others. We can cuddle up like a dependent child, or we can be the one who is responsible under pressure. We can be tough and virile, and we can be soft and gentle. One musical tone playing in harmony with another makes a song more beautiful. Because we have made peace within ourselves, our masculinity is not threatened.
As we discover many new feelings and reactions, it is natural to wonder if they are normal. When we talk with others about the ways we have changed, we learn they have similar feelings. As we become more at peace with ourselves, the various sides of our personalities complement each other, and we appreciate the harmony within us and in our friends.
Today, I am grateful for the richness and variety within myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Be still and listen to the stillness within. --Darlene Larson Jenks
No answer eludes us if we turn to the source of all answers--the stillness within. Prayer accompanied by meditation will always provide the answers we need for the situations facing us. The answers we want are not guaranteed, however. We must trust that we will be directed to take the right steps. Our well being is assured if we let go of the control and turn our wills over to the care of God, our messenger within.
How comforting to know that all answers are as close as our quiet moments. God never chooses to keep them from us. We simply fail to quiet our thoughts long enough to heed them. Our minds race, obsessively, all too often. We jump from one scenario to another, one fear to another, and one emotion to another. And each time our thoughts capture a new focus; we push the answer we seek further into the background.
The process is simple, if I want to follow it. The answers await me if I truly want them. I need only sit quietly and ask God to offer the guidance I need. And then I will sit quietly some more.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Recovery
How easy it is to blame our problems on others. "Look at what he's doing." . . . "Look how long I've waited." . . . "Why doesn't she call?" . . . "If only he'd change then I'd be happy." . . .
Often, our accusations are justified. We probably are feeling hurt and frustrated. In those moments, we may begin to believe that the solution to our pain and frustration is getting the other person to do what we want, or having the outcome we desire. But these self-defeating illusions put the power and control of our life in other people's hands. We call this codependency.
The solution to our pain and frustration, however valid is to acknowledge our own feelings. We feel the anger, the grief; then we let go of the feelings and find peace - within ourselves. We know our happiness isn't controlled by another person, even though we may have convinced ourselves it is. We call this acceptance.
Then we decide that although we'd like our situation to be different, maybe our life is happening this way for a reason. Maybe there is a higher purpose and plan in play, one that's better than we could have orchestrated. We call this faith.
Then we decide what we need to do, what is within our power to do to take care of ourselves. That's called recovery.
It's easy to point our finger at another, but it's more rewarding to gently point it at ourselves.
Today, I will live with my pain and frustration by dealing with my own feelings.
Today I know it's okay to place myself first sometimes. Today I'm doing something very special for myself. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 11
Honor Your Connection to Your Body
Our bodies are matter, the physical form we have assumed. They are infused with our energy, our soul.
My awareness of the body-mind-soul connection came slowly, over many years. I had spent many years denying I had a body, denying its importance. I felt disconnected from it, as though it were something apart from me, a burden I had to carry around and live with. Then I began to see the connection between my emotions and the aches and pains– and sometimes illnesses– my body was experiencing. If I didn’t feel the feeling, listen to myself, my body would pound out the pain until it was heard that way. Energy needs to be discharged somewhere. If it isn’t discharged, the body will absorb and feel it as pain. I began to see the connection between changes in my life and changes in my body, the way the earth marks changing seasons and cycles.
I began to get massages, exercise, and slowly trust the wisdom of my body. I became connected to my body. Yes, I was a soul. Yes, I had a heart. Emotions. Thought. But to live on the physical plane of earth, we need a body. Our body is part of us. It is us. It holds the scars of our life to date, the stories of our life so far, it contains the wisdom and energy of what we need today and tomorrow.
Honor your connection to your body. Honor and value your body’s wisdom. It can tell you many things about your life, your growth, your past, and your path. Learn to listen to your body , and it will speak openly and lovingly to you.
*****
Make use of your imaginative powers
It was a small ad in a catalog for an electric flossing machine. "I don't have the time or energy to floss," the man in the ad declared. "That's why I need this machine to do it for me."
Too busy and too tired?
Some of us complain about all the things we have to do to maintain spiritual health. Prayer. Meditation. Attending support groups. All these things take time and energy, even though we get a good return on the time we invest. Now, we're considering adding another activity to our already full self-care activities list: spending time and energy visualizing to help create positive events in our lives.
When someone first suggested I use visualization as a tool, my reaction was similar to one of the man in the ad. I don't have the time. I'm too busy and tired.
But we're always thinking about something and creating pictures in our minds. Usually what we see are worst case scenarios. So why not take the time, effort, and energy we're already using to see things not working out and instead visualize things working out? If we've got enough time and energy to see the negative what if's, we've got the time and energy to visualize positive events,too.
Visualizing isn't a form of control. Just because we see things working out well doesn't guarantee that they will. But if we can see it, it's more likely to happen than if we can't see it at all.
God, help me use the powers of thought and imagination in the most creative way I can.
*****
Setting a Limit to Sit with Emotions
How Long
When an emotion haunts us, it is often because we are afraid of really feeling it.
Our emotions color our lives with varying palettes. Sometimes we feel a strong emotion in reaction to something that has happened, but emotions also visit us seemingly out of the blue, flooding us unexpectedly with joy or grief or melancholy. Like the weather, they come and go, influencing our mental state with their particular vibration. Sometimes a difficult emotion hangs around longer than we would like, and we begin to wonder when it will release its hold on us. This is often true of grief stemming from loss, for example, or lingering anger over a past event.
Usually, if we allow ourselves to feel our emotions fully when they come up, they recede naturally, giving way to another and another. When an emotion haunts us, it is often because we are afraid of really feeling it. Emotions like despair and rage are powerful, and it is natural to want to hold them at bay. Certainly, we don’t want to let them take us over so that we say or do things we later regret. When we are facing this kind of situation, it can be helpful to ask the spirit, “How long do I need to sit with these emotions, how long do I need to feel these emotions before they can pass?” If you ask sincerely and wait, an answer will come. Setting a time limit on your engagement with that difficult emotion may be just the technique you need to face it fully.
When you have a sense of how much time you need to spend, set a timer. Sit down and make yourself available to the emotion that has been nagging you. All you have to do is feel it. Avoid getting attached to it or rejecting it. Simply let it ebb and flow within you. Emotions are by their nature cyclical, so you can trust that just as one reaches its apex it will pass. Each time you sit with its presence without either repressing or acting out, you will find that that difficult emotion was the catalyst for much needed emotional healing. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I say the Serenity Prayer, sometimes over and over, I occasionally lose sight of the prayer’s meaning even as I repeat its words. So I try to think of the meaning of each phrase as I say it, whether aloud or silently. As I concentrate on the meaning, my understanding grows, along with my capability to realize the difference between what I can change, and what I cannot. Do I see that most improvements in my life will come from changing my own attitudes and actions?
Today I Pray
May my Higher Power show me new and deeper meanings in the Serenity Prayer each time I say it. As I apply it to my life’s situations and relationships, may its truth be underlined for me again and again. May I realize that serenity, courage and wisdom are all that I need to cope with living, but that none of these three have value unless they grow out of my trust in a Higher Power.
Today I Will Remember
God’s formula for living; Serenity, courage and wisdom.
************************************
One More Day
Power said to the world, “You are mine,” The world kept it prisoner on her throne. Love said to the world, “I am thine.” The world gave it the freedom of her house.
– Rabindranath Tagore
We all need to test our spiritual muscles. At first those muscles may seem weak. It’s natural after a lengthy bout with illness to wonder why we were chosen for pain, misery, or illness.
After a time, we become ready to learn more about our own spirituality. We open our minds and our hearts. As we explore this wonderful side of ourselves, we discover our worth, our strengths, our wholeness. And we discover that we are not alone, that a Higher Power is sharing His strength and peace with us.
Today, I will learn more about my spirituality than I knew yesterday. I will feel the peace and strength given to me by my Higher Power.
************************************
Food For Thought
Feeling Deprived
If I allow myself to feel deprived, sooner or later I will overeat or react with negative emotions. I am a human being, a child of God with the same rights as all of His other children. I have needs and preferences, which, if denied and repressed, will surface in a destructive way.
If those around me are eating a special meal and I eat leftovers, which I do not particularly like, I will feel deprived. I may become bad tempered and I may overeat later to compensate. I do not need to have what others are eating, if it is not on my food plan, but my meal should be pleasing to me. I do not need to have and do what everyone else has and does, but I can recognize my desires and preferences and satisfy them when doing so does not injure anyone else.
By overeating, I deprived myself of good health, peace of mind, self-respect, and an attractive appearance. By abstaining, I am making amends to myself for the deprivation. By working the program, I am learning how to satisfy my legitimate needs.
I trust You to supply my needs.
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One Day At A Time
FAITH
”Faith is not belief. Belief is passive.
Faith is active.”
Edith Hamilton
I always believed that God could relieve my suffering if He chose; however, I was overlooking the distinction of the required “partnership” between my choices and his strength. God is not a magician who, with artful finesse, will relieve me of the bondage of my free-will choices. He requires my attention -- and then my ACTION -- in order to work through and in my life.
One day at a time...
I am willing to test my faith by putting forth the required action(s) that will help me move toward my share of miracles that abound in this Program.
~ January K.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
To Whom It May Concern:
I have specialized in the treatment of alcoholism for many years.
In late 1934 I attended a patient who, though he had been a competent businessman of good earning capacity, was an alcoholic of a type I had come to regard as hopeless.
In the course of his third treatment he aquired certain ideas concerning a possible means of recovery. As part of his rehabilitation he commenced to present his conceptions to other alcoholics, impressing upon them that they must do likewise with still others. This has become the basis of a rapidly growing fellowship of these men and their families. This man and over one hundred others appear to have recovered. - Pg. xxv - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
To a practicing addict who lives wholly in the sensations of the body, the recovery state is one of utter boredom. But as we learn to live balanced in body, mind, and soul we will wonder why we ever thought the state of addiction exciting.
May I know that it is not so much boredom as me being boring that's my problem.
Staying with Myself
Today, I see that having my own life begins inside of me. It is not just a function of what I do, but the attitude with which I move through my day. Having my own life is about checking in with myself to see how I'm doing. It's wearing a sweater if I'm cold and taking a break if I'm tired. It's making sure that I'm having enough fun in my life, paying attention to what I enjoy doing, doing more of that and finding ways of reducing what doesn't feel good. Having a life is letting myself have my own unique likes and dislikes, and acting on them in constructive ways. It is not organizing my life so that it is good enough for everyone else, forgetting that it needs to be good enough for me as well. I occupy the center of my own life.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'We can do no great things, only small things with great love.' ~Mother Teresa
God does not want me to do extraordinary things; S/He wants me to do ordinary things extraordinarily well.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Being sober doesn't keep you sober.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know it's okay to place myself first sometimes. Today I'm doing something very special for myself.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
It was like: 'Hi, we are Alcoholics Anonymous, we're a fellowship of self-admitted alcoholics and pathological liars; we want you to trust us. If you can believe that, you can start getting well. - Doug D.
bluidkiti
10-04-2021, 06:31 AM
October 12
Daily Reflections
CURBING RASHNESS
When we speak or act hastily or rashly, the ability to be fair-minded and tolerant
evaporates on the spot.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 91
Being fair-minded and tolerant is a goal toward which I must work
daily. I ask God, as I understand Him, to help me to be loving and tolerant to my loved
ones, and to those with whom I am in close contact. I ask for guidance to curb my speech
when I am agitated, and I take a moment to reflect on the emotional upheaval my words
may cause, not only to someone else, but also to myself. Prayer, meditation and
inventories are the key to sound thinking and positive action for me.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Am I still on a "free ride" in A.A.? Am I all get and no give? Do I go to meetings and
always sit in the back row and let others do all the work? Do I think it's enough just
because I'm sober and can rest on my laurels? If so, I haven't gone very far in the
program, nor am I getting nearly enough of what it has to offer. I will be a weak member
until I get in there and help carry the load. I must eventually get off the bench and get
into the game. I'm not just a spectator; I'm supposed to be one of the team. Do I go in
there and carry the ball?
Meditation For The Day
Try to be thankful for whatever vision you have. Try to perform, in the little things,
faithful service to God and others. Do your small part every day in a spirit of service to
God. Be a doer of God's word, not a hearer only. In your daily life try to keep faith with
God. Every day brings a new opportunity to be of some use. Even when you are tempted
to rest or let things go or to evade the issue, make it a habit to meet the issue squarely as
a challenge and not to hold back.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may perform each task faithfully. I pray that I may meet each issue of life
squarely and not hold back.
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As Bill Sees It
"POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL", p.283
I had gone steadily downhill, and on that day in 1934 I lay upstairs
in the hospital, knowing for the first time that I was utterly
hopeless.
Lois was downstairs, and Dr. Silkworth was trying in his gentle way to
tell her what was wrong with me and that I was hopeless. "But Bill has
a tremendous amount of will power," she said. "He has tried
desperately to get well. We have tried everything. Doctor, why can't
he stop?"
He explained that my drinking, once a habit, had become an obsession,
a true insanity that condemned me to drink against my will.
********************************
"In the late stages of our drinking, the will to resist has fled. Yet
when we admit complete defeat and when we become entirely ready
to try A.A. principles, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new
dimension-freedom under God as we understand Him."
1. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 52
2. LETTER, 1966
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
A fatal Feature of alcoholism
Admitting defeat
Part of alcoholism's deadliness lies in its peculiar tendency to blind the victim to the hopelessness of the situation. Time and again, AA members meet people who are in the final stages of their disease, yet are still clinging to the fallacy that things are not as bad as they seem. Indeed, many alcoholics who have engineered their own ruin still believe they are either victims of bad luck or of malevolent action by others.
Let's remember, however, that others might not be so fortunate. We must not criticize them for not being able to accept the hopelessness of their condition. We should also look for our own blind spots about others problems in our lives.
I'll remember today that only the 12 Step program arrested my fatal disease and keeps it at bay. I'll feel kndly toward others who are having trouble admitting defeat; maybe this is the day it will happen for them.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Trust only movement. Life happens at the level of events, not words.---Alfred Adler
Being sober is an event. Being sober also means movement. We go to meetings. We find and meet with a sponsor. We talk with friends. If we don’t act in these ways were not sober.
Our actions also tell us if we’re leading a spiritual life. What do you do when you see someone in need? Spirituality means helping. It’s not just kind words.
In Step Four and Ten, we check out our action, not our words. Our actions will tell us if we’re on the recovery path.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to not hide in words. I pray for the strength to take the right action. Help me walk a sober path.
Action for the Day: Today as I work Step Ten, I’ll focus only on my actions How have I acted sober today?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
...there are two entirely opposite attitudes possible in facing the problems of one's life. One, to try and change the external world, the other, to try and change oneself. --Joanna Field
God grant us the courage to change what we can--ourselves. How difficult it is to let go of our struggles to control and change someone else. How frequently we assume that everything would be fine if only someone else would change. All that needs to change is an attitude, our own.
Taking responsibility for improving one's own life is an important step toward emotional health. Blaming another for our circumstances keeps us stuck and offers no hope for improved conditions. Personal power is as available as our decision to use it. And it is bolstered by all the strength we'll ever need. The decision to take our lives in hand will exhilarate us. The decision each day to be thoughtful, prayerful, and wholly responsible for all that we do will nourish our developing selves. Each responsible choice moves us toward our wholeness, strengthening our sense of self, our well-being.
I will change only who I can today: myself.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.
pp. 154-155
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I wound up on academic probation (I had always been on the honor roll in high school) my first semester sophomore year, and my response to that was to change my major. My life in campus revolved around parties, drinking, and men. I surrounded myself with people who drank as I did. Even though several people had already expressed their concern over my drinking, I rationalized that I was only doing what every other red-blooded college student did.
p. 321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
But that is not all of the danger. Every time a person imposes his instincts unreasonably upon others, unhappiness follows. If the pursuit of wealth tramples upon people who happen to be in the way, then anger, jealousy, and revenge are likely to be aroused. If sex runs riot, there is a similar uproar. Demands made upon other people for too much attention, protection, and love can only invite domination or revulsion in the protectors themselves-- two emotions quite as unhealthy as the demands which evoked them. When an individual's desire for prestige becomes uncontrollable, whether in the sewing circle or at the international conference table, other people suffer and often revolt. This collision of instincts can produce anything from a cold snub to a blazing revolution. In these ways we are set in conflict not only with ourselves, but with other people who have instincts, too.
p. 44
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Be still and listen to the stillness within.
You must look into people, as well as at them.
--Lord Chesterfield
There is one thing worse than waiting on God... it's wishing you had.
--unknown
God is never in a hurry.
--unknown
"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies."
--Mother Teresa
"When you see the value of continued growth, the circumstances around you become
stepping stones."
--Clyde M. Narrimore
The shortest distance between a problem and a solution is the distance between your
knees and the floor. The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
DISCOVERY
"I invent nothing. I rediscover."
-- Auguste Rodin
I believe that spirituality is given to every human being and we need only discover it in
our lives to experience its power. The history of my life has been more of a "cycle" than
a straight line leading into the distance. I am constantly returning to past events,
reminiscences and experiences that were part of my yesterdays but converge into my
present. I am rediscovering my yesterdays in my todays; the fruits of my tomorrows are
planted within today.
So it seems that my journey is not simply forward. It also involves a rediscovery of
yesterday in today. My life is a mystery that exists within God.
O Lord, with You eternity is ever present and occasionally I get a glimpse of it.
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"He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge."
Psalm 91:4
"Behold what manner of love the father hath bestowed upon us that we should be called
the children of God."
1 John 3:1
Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness,
knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control,
perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness,
brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love.
2 Peter 1:5-7
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Daily Inspiration
Think good and wise thoughts over and over again until you make them your own. Lord, You have given me a strong foundation and the strength to stand firm for what I believe.
Never make the mistake of taking more credit than is due or less credit than you are worth. Lord, You have created me in Your image. Therefore, I am goodness and with You can accomplish great things.
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NA Just For Today
Being Right
"When we admit that our lives have become unmanageable, we don't have to argue our point of view... We no longer have to be right all the time."
Basic Text p. 56
Nothing isolates us more quickly from the warmth and camaraderie of our fellow NA members than having to be "right." Insecure, we pretend to be some kind of authority figure. Suffering from low self-esteem, we try to build ourselves up by putting others down. At best, such tactics push others away from us; at worst, they draw attack. The more we try to impress others with how "right" we are, the more wrong we become.
We don't have to be "right" to be secure; we don't have to pretend to have all the answers for others to love or respect us. In fact, just the opposite is true. None of us have all the answers. We depend upon one another to help bridge the gaps in our understanding of things, and we depend upon a Power greater than our own to make up for our personal powerlessness. We live easily with others when we offer what we know, admit what we don't, and seek to learn from our peers. We live securely in ourselves when we cease relying on our own power and start relying on the God we've come to understand in recovery.
We don't have to be "right" all the time, just recovering.
Just for today: God, I admit my powerlessness and the unmanageability of my life. Help me live with others as an equal, dependent upon you for direction and strength.
pg. 298
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
We can secure other people's approval, if we do right and try hard; but our own is worth a hundred of it. . . . --Mark Twain
There was once a young girl who thought that if only she tried a little harder, she could please her parents; if only she were prettier, her friends would like her better. She tried constantly to gain their approval. Sometimes they said they liked her, and sometimes they didn't.
Then one night a fairy came to her in a dream and told her, "You are fine just the way you are. You don't have to change. I want you to start noticing your own beauty and loving yourself exactly the way you are."
Doing what the fairy suggested--giving love and approval to herself--wasn't easy, but she found that when she did it she felt a peace that was not dependent on what others thought. She thanked her fairy for caring enough to come and give her such wise advice.
What are some things I like about myself?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I resolve to meet evil courageously, but when even a small temptation cometh, I am in sore straits. That which seemeth trifling sometimes giveth rise to a grievous temptation. --Thomas a' Kempis
Even in recovery, we know we are vulnerable men, always subject to a return to old patterns. Sometimes we can understand the triggering event; other times there is no apparent reason for temptation to reappear. Perhaps it comes when we least expect it, when our guard is lowest. We may be tempted simply because we are addicts or codependents. Our powerlessness reminds us of our need for faithfulness to the program.
When we think we have moved beyond the draw of old behaviors, we veer away from our path of recovery. In saying we have grown out of our powerlessness, or that our resolve can now protect us, we are heading back into old troubles. Admitting the truth is unsettling. It also makes us more honest, more accessible, more spiritual, and more ready to deal with threats to our recovery.
I live with my powerlessness every day. Help me admit it to myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...there are two entirely opposite attitudes possible in facing the problems of one's life. One, to try and change the external world, the other, to try and change oneself. --Joanna Field
God grant us the courage to change what we can--ourselves. How difficult it is to let go of our struggles to control and change someone else. How frequently we assume that everything would be fine if only someone else would change. All that needs to change is an attitude, our own.
Taking responsibility for improving one's own life is an important step toward emotional health. Blaming another for our circumstances keeps us stuck and offers no hope for improved conditions. Personal power is as available as our decision to use it. And it is bolstered by all the strength we'll ever need. The decision to take our lives in hand will exhilarate us. The decision each day to be thoughtful, prayerful, and wholly responsible for all that we do will nourish our developing selves. Each responsible choice moves us toward our wholeness, strengthening our sense of self, our well-being.
I will change only who I can today: myself.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Being Gentle with Ourselves
During Times of Grief
The process of adapting to change and loss takes energy. Grief is draining, sometimes exhausting. Some people need to "cocoon for transformation," in Pat Carnes's words, while going through grief.
We may feel more tired than usual. Our ability to function well in other areas of our life may be reduced, temporarily. We may want to hide out in the safety of our bedroom.
Grief is heavy. It can wear us down.
It's okay to be gentle with ourselves when we're gong through change and grief. Yes, we want to maintain the disciplines of recovery. But we can be compassionate with ourselves. We do not have to expect more from ourselves than we can deliver during this time. We do not even have to expect as much from ourselves as we would normally and reasonably expect.
We may need more rest, more sleep, more comfort. We may be more needy and have less to give. It is okay to accept ourselves, and our changed needs, during times of grief, stress, and change.
It is okay to allow ourselves to cocoon during times of transformation. We can surrender to the process, and trust that a new, exciting energy is being created within us.
Before long, we will take wings and fly.
God, help me accept my changed needs during times of grief, change, and loss.
I do not let pain or discomfort stop me from looking at myself in a true and honest light. I do not run away from myself today or block or disguise my reality. I face my life fully today to learn from its lessons. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 12
Trust Yourself to Know What’s Right
Sometimes we find ourselves with people or in places we can’t adapt to. No matter how hard we try, no matter how much we want it to, it just doesn’t feel right. Doesn’t fit. We are trying to jam the proverbial square peg into the round hole. Only what we’re trying to jam isn’t a block of wood– it’s us.
Sometimes in situations like these we revert to old ways of thinking, believing, and feeling. There must be something wrong with me if I don’t like this, if this isn’t working. If I try harder, control my emotions, jam a little harder, this square peg– me– will fit.
Those are the times we may begin to feel confused, weak, scattered, uncertain. We abandon ourselves. Our emotions disappear. Our passion wanes. We may begin sleeping, escaping, drifting further and further away. Our soul begins squirming in reaction to what we’re trying to force ourselves to do. We may become physically ill. It’s as though we’re allergic to our surroundings. Sometimes, we may spend years in this process– depending on what we’re afraid to face or what we’re afraid to lose. Other times, this process may only last hours or days,.
We can take as much time as we need to listen to and take care of ourselves. But if we love ourselves, we won’t torture ourselves for long, because we know we don’t have to. If a place or person or situation doesn’t work for us, that’s okay. We don’t have to punish ourselves. We don’t have to go away from ourselves. We can leave the situation.
Trust yourself– your body and your soul– to know what’s right for you. Learn to feel the energy of a situation, place, or person. If something feels right, you feel in harmony mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t abandon yourself. Leave the situation. Try something else until you do feel right.
You may not always know at first when a thing, place, or person is wrong for you. But if you listen to your body and trust your heart, you can learn to tell when it’s right.
*****
more language of letting go
See it and let it go
This is a reminder. While you're using your imagination, embracing your dreams, and spending your time visualizing positive performance, don't forget to let go.
Don't worry about how things will come to pass. Your part is seeing the best for yourself. Then return to the details of your daily life.
It's safe to let go and let God. Just because we have the creative powers to imagine doesn't mean we have to control the rest. Say, I see, then let it go.
Let God work the manifest.
God, after I've seen my dreams and visualizations, help me give them back to you.
*****
Expressions of the Heart
Creating Meaningful Homemade Gifts
The gifts we craft with our own hands are often the most significant because the love that drove us to create is infused in the products of our creation. And the recipients of these homemade offerings receive a token of our willingness to invest ourselves in their joy. Allow these ideas to inspire you:
1. When you craft a beautifully decorated prayer box (or jar) for loved ones, you give them the gift of spiritual awareness. As you share this gift, explain that it should serve as a receptacle for their hopes, dreams, and loves—as well as worries—and thus a reminder of who they were, are, and will someday be.
2. If you love journaling, share your writing joy with family and friends by giving each a unique, handmade personal journal. A simple spiral notebook dressed up with paper, fabric, photographs, or other embellishments will give your loved ones a special place to record their private thoughts.
3. Erase the distance between yourself and your far away loved ones by presenting each with a photo journal documenting how your life has changed in the past year. Or introduce them to your locale with a homemade guidebook that highlights everything you love about your town or city.
4. When you sew medicine bags for the people you care about, you can rest assured your gift will always be close to their hearts. A small pouch can be filled with many meditative or symbolic items, such as quartz crystals, sage, or magical objects.
5. A progressive photo album, wherein pictures tell the story of your relationships from the past up to the present, can be a simple yet poignant reminder of the many wonderful experiences you and your loved ones have shared over the years.
6. Give the gift of serenity with a guided meditation you create and record to CD or tape. Your loved ones will take pleasure in being led through tranquil landscapes by the soothing sound of your voice.
7. Hand-crafted ornaments that can be hung on trees, in windows, and on walls afford you an opportunity to surround the important people in your life with beauty. Whether you prefer to work with clay, crystals, fabric, baked dough, or natural objects, your gift can serve as a calming focal point in your loved ones’ homes.
Whether you choose to give a gift or simply share your friendship and love, remember that it is the intention behind the thought that is most important. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Many people we meet in The Program radiate a kind of special glow — a joy for living that shows in their faces and very bearing. They’ve put aside alcohol and other mood-altering chemicals and have progressed to the point where they’re “high” on life itself. Their confidence and enthusiasm are contagious — especially to those who are new in The Program. The astonishing thing to newcomers is that those same joyous people also were once heavily burdened. The miracle of their before-and-after stories and new outlook is living proof that The Program works. Does my progress in The Program serve to carry the message to others?
Today I Pray
I pray that my own transformation through The Program — from burdened to unburdened, beaten down to unbeat, careless to caring, tyrannized by chemicals to chemically free -0- will be as much inspiration for newcomers as the dramatic changes to other’ lives have been for me. May I — like those other joyous ones in the fellowship — learn how to be “high on life.”
Today I Will Remember
Life is the greatest “high” of them all.
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One More Day
Joy . . . is found only in the good things of the soul.
– Philo
Every day has its ups and downs — its good and bad moments. The joys that today offers must be personally claimed, by each of us, or they will pass by unnoticed.
The events that cause a joyful experience are different for all individuals. We sometimes share joyful experiences with other people. Watching an infant walk for the first time can be a shared joy and a lasting memory. Recognizing that our friends, or perhaps even ourselves, have found help in dealing with personal problems or harmful behaviors can also be joyful experiences.
Joy can also be a private time — fishing on a lovely morning, watching the petals of a flow unfold, or being part of a growing relationship. All contribute to our sense of well-being.
In this day, I will be aware of the people and activities that give me joy.
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Food For Thought
Moving Forward
Time past is gone forever, and we can never go back to it. Even our disease progresses forward. We cannot expect to control it by a return to measures, which may have worked for a time in the past. Those methods eventually failed, and trying them again will only bring us to the same point of failure.
The only way to avoid repetitious failure is to move forward creatively as our Higher Power leads us. Each day is a new creation, and each day brings new lessons and opportunities. We build on what is past, but we do not need to repeat it.
Moving forward involves risking what is unknown. The old, familiar rut, depressing as it is, is a known quantity. Moving out of it requires that we have courage and that we trust in One who knows and cares. To move on, we must act. Insights do not produce growth until they are accompanied by specific actions.
May I risk new actions as You lead me forward.
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One Day At A Time
GRIEF
“To spare oneself from grief at all cost
can be achieved only at the price of a total detachment,
which excludes the ability to experience happiness.”
Erich Fromm
In the years before program I lived in a bland state of non-feeling and I ran away from all painful emotions, especially loss and grief. Of course my drug of choice was always there to keep the painful emotions at bay. Whenever I experienced any kind of loss, I was always able to focus my attention on other things. Instead of feeling my own emotions, I focused on being strong for someone else whose loss I perceived to be greater than mine. For some strange reason I didn’t think I had the right to grieve.
After losing a beloved cat recently, I was overwhelmed by all the painful emotions of loss and grief. It was almost as though all of my previous losses were combined into this latest loss, but instead of running from my feelings, I allowed myself the luxury of grieving for my cat who was so special to me. This time I didn’t need to run away into my addiction. Of course it was hard and painful, but I know that allowing myself to feel even uncomfortable feelings like this is part of being alive and that means allowing myself to feel both the positive emotions and the negative ones.
One day at a time...
I will allow myself to feel both the good emotions and the bad ones. Because I have a program, I don’t need to blot them out with addictive behavior.
~ Sharon S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever ( with an without a solemn oath ), taking more exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums - we could increase the list ad infinitum. - Pg. 31 - More About Alcoholism
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We do not believe in blind following. As when Clement wrote 'faith must go hand in hand with inquiry.' If you do not 'get' something, ASK. Ask at meetings, ask a sober friend, ask your sponsor, or ask your Higher Power in meditation. Honest questions get honest answers.
God, as I understand You, right now I want to know ______________. Thank You for the answer I know I'll receive.
Fear
Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears, and not dictate or color my life circumstances because of them. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing mobilizes my deep fears, and they come up more intensely than ever. This is a part of my process of growth, and growth is not neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that I am afraid and that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, particularly when they have been repressed and are surfacing after many years, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'A boxer was in his corner on his knees praying, and someone asked a minister, 'Will that help him?' The minister replied, 'Not if he can't box.' ~Fr Joe M., (P 105, Alkiespeak)
God works with me, not for me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
There is a big difference between being a mistake and making one.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I do not let pain or discomfort stop me from looking at myself in a true and honest light.
I do not run away from myself today or block or disguise my reality.
I face my life fully today to learn from its lessons.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
After all is said and done. More is said than done. Anon.
bluidkiti
10-04-2021, 06:32 AM
October 13
Daily Reflections
UNREMITTING INVENTORIES
Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment,
and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove
them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make
amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely
turn our thoughts to someone we can help.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84
The immediate admission of wrong thoughts or actions is a
tough task for most human beings, but for recovering alcoholics
like me it is difficult because of my propensity toward ego,
fear and pride. The freedom the A.A. program offers me becomes
more abundant when, through unremitting inventories of myself,
I admit, acknowledge and accept responsibility for my wrong-doing.
It is possible then for me to grow into a deeper and better
understanding of humility. My willingness to admit when the
fault is mine facilitates the progression of my growth and helps
me to become more understanding and helpful to others.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
A.A. work is one hundred percent voluntary. It depends on each
and every one of our members to volunteer to do his or her share.
Newcomers can sit on the sidelines until they have got over their
nervousness and confusion. They have a right to be helped by all,
until they can stand on their own feet. But the time inevitably
comes when they have to speak up and volunteer to do their share
in meetings and in twelfth step work. Until that time comes, they
are not a vital part of A.A. They are only in the process of being
assimilated. Has my time come to volunteer?
Meditation For The Day
God's kingdom on earth is growing slowly, like a seed in the
ground. In the growth of his kingdom there is always progress
among the few who are out ahead of the crowd. Keep striving for
something better and there can be no stagnation in your life.
Eternal life, abundant life is yours for the seeking. Do not
mis-spend time over past failures. Count the lessons earned
from failures as rungs upon the ladder of progress. Press onward
toward the goal.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be willing to grow. I pray that I may keep
stepping up on the rungs of the ladder of life.
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As Bill Sees It
FAITH-A BLUEPRINT-AND WORK, p. 284
"The idea of 'twenty-four-hour living' applies primarily to the
emotional life of the individual. Emotionally speaking, we must not live
in yesterday, nor in tomorrow.
"But I have never been able to see that this means the individual, the
group, or A.A. as a whole should give no thought whatever to how to
function tomorrow or even in the more distant future. Faith alone
never constructed the house you live in. There had to be a blueprint
and a lot of work to bring it into reality.
"Nothing is truer for us of A.A. than the Biblical saying 'Faith without
works is dead.' A.A.'s services, all designed to make more and better
Twelfth Step work possible, are the 'works' that insure our life and
growth by preventing anarchy or stagnation."
LETTER, 1954
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Walk In Dry Places
When are we receiving guidance?
Guidance
We have to face the fact that what we see as divine guidance may simply be an expression of self-will.. We are all too familiar with examples of people who did terrible things, claiming to be obeying orders from God.
We cannot judge whether another is really receiving guidance from a Higher Power. In our own lives, however, we can learn to distinguish between God’s guidance and our self-will. The outstanding characteristic of a divinely guided action is the strong sense of peace it brings. Even if we have to deny oureslves for a time, we sense that the final outcome of any decision will be beneficial for all concerned. We do not have to argue for or defend our decision.
When self-will is in the saddle, we may find ourselves being called on to justify our actions. We may also have to quell or rationalize feelings of guilt or doubt.
The right answers come when self-will is working in harmony with the Higher Will. Our lves will have a quality that everybody senses, including ourselves.
Knowing that self-will can easily lead me astray, I'll listen today for the divine voice of my Higher Power.
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Keep It Simple
Self-pity is one of the most dangerous forms of self-centeredness. It fogs our vision. ---Kathy S.
Sometimes we get stuck in our own way of seeing things. We may feel as if everything that happens, happens to us or for us. If it rains, we may think about our ruined picnic and not about the dry fields that need the rain. We need to focus on the big picture. This keeps us from becoming self-centered. If it rains, we’ll gather indoors and be glad for the farmers. When we do our part, things go well. When we don’t we feel it. Every else feels it too. Self pity keeps us from doing our part.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see myself as a big part of the picture. My job is just is to do my part.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think about how I fit in with my Higher Power, my family, the place I work, my community. Do I do my part?
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Each Day a New Beginning
Never turn down a job because you think it's too small; you don't know where it can lead. --Julia Morgan
How short is our vision of where an invitation might take us! Any invitation. Of one thing we can be certain, it offers an opportunity for making a choice, which means taking responsibility for who we're becoming. Choice making is growth enhancing because it strengthens our awareness of personal power.
Our lives unfold in small measures, just as small as they need to be for our personal comfort. It's doubtful that we could handle everything the future has in store, today; however, we will be prepared for it, measure by measure, choice by choice, day by day. We need not fear; what is meted out to us in the invitations offered is for our benefit. We are on a pathway to goodness.
The thrill of making choices is new to many of us when we enter this program. We'd opted for the passive life, all too often, and we became increasingly aware of, and often depressed by, our self-imposed powerlessness. Free at last! We are free at last to fully participate in our lives.
I will be grateful for the many options to act tugging at me today. Every choice I make strengthens my womanhood.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
His call to the clergyman led him presently to a certain resident of the town, who, though formerly able and respected, was then nearing the nadir of alcoholic despair. It was the usual situation; home in jeopardy, wife ill, children distracted, bills in arrears and standing damaged. He had a desperate desire to stop, but saw no way out, for he had earnestly tried many avenues of escape. Painfully aware of being somehow abnormal, the man did not fully realize what it meant to be alcoholic.*
* This refers to Bill's first visit with Dr. Bob. These men later became co-founders of A.A. Bill's story opens the text of this book; Dr. Bob's heads the Story Section.
p. 155
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
Somehow I managed to graduate, but while most of my friends were securing jobs and abruptly stopping their boozing, I seemed to be left behind on campus. I had resolved that I, too, would now settle down and drink properly, but to my frustration I found I could not do so.
p. 321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
At this stage of the inventory proceedings, our sponsors come to the rescue. They can do this, for they are the carriers of A.A.'s tested experience with Step Four. They comfort the melancholy one by first showing him that his case is not strange or different, that his character defects are probably not more numerous or worse than those of anyone else in A.A. This the sponsor promptly proves by talking freely and easily, and without exhibitionism, about his own defects, past and present. This calm, yet realistic, stocktaking is immensely reassuring. The sponsor probably points out that the newcomer has some assets which can be noted along with his liabilities. This tends to clear away morbidity and encourage balance. As soon as he begins to be more objective, the newcomer can fearlessly, rather than fearfully, look
at his own defects.
p. 46
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"Don't dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next.
Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer."
--Denis Waitley
I pray to see the path God lights for me as I am at times blinded by my own lack of
consciousness or lack of faith.
--Shelley
Spend 2 minutes a day reassuring yourself that you are made of loving
thoughts. Spend the rest of the day acting on those thoughts.
--unknown
"Those who walk with God always get to their destination."
--Unknown
"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else."
--Charles Dickens
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PREJUDICE
"I am the inferior of any man
whose rights I trample underfoot."
-- Horace Greeley
Now I can see my feelings of inferiority in the assumed arrogance of my past
behavior. Now I see that behind the pride was the need to prove myself. The
manipulation was a cover for my insecurity.
At some point years ago I accepted the idea that I was not good enough and needed
to pretend to be something different. The use of alcohol was part of this disease
process. Money, friends, fast cars and debts were all drawn into the delusion.
Today I am learning to accept me. I am not a millionaire, I will probably never be a
millionaire and so I do not need to adopt the lifestyle of a millionaire! I work in an
office. I drive a Ford. But today I am happy. Today I can pay my bills. Today I have
friends who are involved in my life. Today I do not have to put people down to
feel important. Today I have discovered that the people I treated with disdain are
just like me.
I pray that I may receive healing and forgiveness from those I considered inferior.
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Jesus said to him, "If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes."
Mark 9:23
"The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more."
Psalm 121:8
"Come near to God and he will come near to you."
James 4:8a
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Daily Inspiration
Good is always coming to you. No matter what is happening in your life, you can bless it with prayer and be peaceful. Lord, You give me the courage to face any situation confidently and victoriously.
Choose to be worthy to yourself and never confuse self worth with behavior. Lord, help me to be less critical of my past and see that this moment right now is all that I can do anything about.
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NA Just For Today
Making A Difference
"Words cannot describe the sense of spiritual awareness that we receive when we have given something, no matter how small, to another person."
Basic Text p. 100
Sometimes it seems as though there is so much wrong with the world that we might as well forget trying to make a difference. "After all," we think, "what in the world can I do? I'm just one person." Whether our concerns are so broad that we desire global peace or so personal that we simply want recovery made available to every addict who wants it, the task seems overwhelming. "So much work to do, so little time," we sigh, sometimes wondering how we'll ever do any good.
Amazingly enough, the smallest contributions can make the biggest difference. To gain more from life than an ordinary, plodding existence requires very little effort on our parts. We ourselves are transformed by the deep satisfaction we experience when we lift the spirits of just one person. When we smile at someone who is frowning, when we let someone in front of us on the freeway, when we call a newcomer just to say we care, we enter the realm of the extraordinary.
Want to change the world? Start with the addict sitting next to you tonight, and then imagine your act of kindness multiplied. One person at a time, each one of us makes a difference.
Just for today: An act of kindness costs me nothing, but is priceless to the recipient. I will be kind to someone today.
pg. 299
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
...(the king) can deprive them of the benefit of sun and rain, . . . and they are at the same time pelted from above with great stones, . . . while the roofs of their houses are beaten to pieces. --Jonathan Swift
How do we punish those momentarily gone wrong? Do we try hurting with words--jab them in the heart with some spear-shaped phrases, slap them in the face with an insult or two? Maybe we like to poison them with a strong dose of silence. Have we tried to make them feel bad by making them feel sorry for us? Do we remind them daily that what went wrong with our lives is really all their fault?
We must remember that we are the rulers of our own lives only, and this knowledge gives us the power to punish only ourselves. It also gives us control over our lives, so that others' actions need not wrong us, and we need not punish.
Have I been punishing someone?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I can sing a prayer as well as say it. --Baal Shem Tov
Lightness of spirit, song, and liberation are the products of a hearty spirituality. There is never a moment we don't have reason to fret or mourn. If we need to grieve, our recovery helps and supports us. But more than that, we are freed in this new life to be men of song and humor. We can sing although life is painful, because we are part of a group of recovering people. We're part of an unfolding mystery. We have love and it is beautiful.
Each time we let go of a secret or an old guilt or a worry about the future, our spirit is lightened. Maybe we experience this at its fullest while spending time with friends who take us just as we are. Perhaps we find it by seeing a funny movie or singing with a group. In the wisdom of the Steps, we are asked to do difficult and painful tasks, which lead to our spiritual awakening. A light spirit celebrates the outcome of our hard work.
I will remember that my laughter and song are also ways of praying.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Never turn down a job because you think it's too small; you don't know where it can lead. --Julia Morgan
How short is our vision of where an invitation might take us! Any invitation. Of one thing we can be certain, it offers an opportunity for making a choice, which means taking responsibility for who we're becoming. Choice making is growth enhancing because it strengthens our awareness of personal power.
Our lives unfold in small measures, just as small as they need to be for our personal comfort. It's doubtful that we could handle everything the future has in store, today; however, we will be prepared for it, measure by measure, choice by choice, day by day. We need not fear; what is meted out to us in the invitations offered is for our benefit. We are on a pathway to goodness.
The thrill of making choices is new to many of us when we enter this program. We'd opted for the passive life, all too often, and we became increasingly aware of, and often depressed by, our self-imposed powerlessness. Free at last! We are free at last to fully participate in our lives.
I will be grateful for the many options to act tugging at me today. Every choice I make strengthens my womanhood.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Substance over Form
I'm learning that for a variety of reasons, I've spent much of my life focusing on form rather than substance. My focus has been on having my hair done perfectly, wearing the right clothes, having my makeup applied perfectly, living in the right place, furnishing it with the right furniture, working at the right job, and having the right man. Form, rather than substance, has controlled my behavior in many areas of my life. Now, I'm finally getting to the truth. It's substance that counts. --Anonymous
There is nothing wrong in wanting to look our best. Whether we are striving to create a self, a relationship, or a life, we need to have some solid ideas about what we want that to look like.
Form gives us a place to begin. But for many of us, form has been a substitute for substance. We may have focused on form to compensate for feeling afraid or feeling inferior. We may have focused on form because we didn't know how to focus on substance.
Form is the outline; substance is what fills it in. We fill in the outline of ourselves by being authentic; we fill in the outline of our life by showing up for life and participating to the best of our ability.
Now, in recovery, we're learning to pay attention to how things work and feel, not just to what they look like.
Today, I will focus on substance in my life. I will fill in the lines of myself with a real person - me. I will concentrate on the substance of my relationships, rather than what they look like. I will focus on the real working of my life, instead of the trappings.
I am at peace today knowing that God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 13
You Are on Time
Quit wondering, worrying, and blaming yourself for being late. Or worse yet, missing the boat.
“Nothing else in the universe frets about being late. Does the moon ask itself if it’s where it should be? Does the sun say, “I must hurry, else I’ll be late?” a friend asked one evening when I was worrying about not being on time.
Stare up into the sky on a beautiful moonlit night. Feel the quiet, timeless rhythm of the planets, the moon, the stars, the universe. Know that you’re connected, tuned into a rhythm deeper and more secure than all your wondering could imagine. Breathe deeply. Relax. Let your pace spring from knowing that inside your heart.
Trust the rhythm of the universe. You are right where you need to be. You’ll get where you need to go. You have all the time you need.
*****
more language of letting go
Let go of what you can't see,too
Let life unfold, even if you can't see the good that you want coming your way. Are you worried about what's going to happen next? Has there been a shift in your job or relationship that makes you tense?
Let life unfold. Don't limit it by the past or even by what you can see and visualze. Don't deny that you feel discouraged or anxious. Let today unfold. Then tomorrow, do the same. If you've been worrying about something and you can't see how it could possibly work out and there's nothing to do now, then relax and let things unfold.
Sometimes the unexpected things that manifest are better than what we can imagine or see. Even if we can't see the good coming our way, God can.
God, help me know that what is unseen today will be made clear when the time is right.
*****
The Start of Change
Breaking Family Cycles by Madisyn Taylor
Breaking the chains of family cycles can be done, and it only takes one person to step and take action.
It is easy to believe that in leaving our childhood homes and embarking upon the journey of adulthood, we have effectively removed ourselves from harmful and self-perpetuating familial patterns. In looking closely at ourselves, however, we may discover that our behaviors and beliefs are still those that were impressed upon us during our youth by our parents, grandparents, and the generations that preceded them. We may find ourselves unconsciously perpetuating cycles of the previous generations, such as fear of having enough, not showing affection, and secrecy patterns. Yet the transmission of negative patterns from one generation to the next is not inevitable. It is possible to become the endpoint at which negative family cycles that have thrived for generations are exhausted and can exert their influence no longer. Breaking the pattern is a matter of overcoming those values imprinted upon us long ago in order to replace them with pure love, tolerance, and conscious awarenes! s.
Even if you have struggled with the cumulative effects of family cycles that were an expression of established modes of living and a reflection of the strife your ancestors were forced to endure, you can still liberate yourself from the effects of your family history. The will to divest yourself of old, dark forms of familial energy and carry forth a new loving energy may come in the form of an epiphany. You may one day simply realize that certain aspects of your early life have negatively affected your health, happiness, and ability to evolve as an individual. Or you may find that in order to transcend long-standing patterns of limiting beliefs, irrational behavior, and emotional stiltedness, you have to question your values and earnestly examine how your family has impacted your personality. Only when you understand how family cycles have influenced you can you gain freedom from those cycles.
In order to truly change, you must give yourself permission to change. Breaking family patterns is in no way an act of defiance or betrayal. It is important that you trust yourself implicitly when determining the behaviors and beliefs that will help you overwrite the generation-based cyclical value system that limited your individual potential. Many people are on the earth at this time to break family cycles, for all of you are true pioneers. In breaking negative family cycles, you will discover that your ability to express your feelings and needs grows exponentially and that you will embark upon a journey toward greater well-being that can positively impact generations to come. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
My progress in recovery depends in large measure of my attitude, and my attitude is up to me. It’s the way I decide to look at things. Nobody can force an attitude on me. For me, a good attitude is a point of view unclouded by self-pity and resentments. There will be stumbling blocks in my path, without a doubt. But The Program has taught me that stumbling blocks can be turned into stepping stones for growth. Do I believe, as Tennyson put it, “that men may rise on stepping stones of their dead selves to hide things…”?
Today I Pray
May God help me cultivate a healthy attitude toward myself. The Program and other people. God, keep me from losing my spiritual stabilizers, which keep me level in purpose and outlook. Let me ignore self-pity, discouragement and my tendency to over-dramatize. Let no dead-weight burden throw me out of balance.
Today I Will Remember
I can’t be discouraged with God on my side.
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One More Day
You learn to build your roads on today, because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans, and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
– Veronica Shoffstal
We may have lived a significant portion of our adult lives planning for the future. Although we must make some provision for tomorrow — savings accounts, wills, pension plans — our attempts to live a full, rewarding life must be made each day.
Growth occurs in the present; it’s never accomplished if it’s postponed until tomorrow. Each day we choose the direction of our lives, whether we know it or not. Either we take positive steps toward better goals and stronger values, or we move not at all by “planning” our lives in some uncertain future.
I will make good choices for myself in the reality of today.
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Food For Thought
Rigorous Honesty
As we work the OA program, we find that we cannot be rigorously honest about what we are eating unless we are rigorously honest about our other actions as well. Once our Higher Power takes charge of our lives, a general housecleaning occurs. Gradually, we see that the attitudes and activities, which undermine our integrity, have to go.
The housecleaning process can be painful. It involves facing aspects of ourselves, which we would prefer to remain hidden - our dependency, pride, selfishness, and avarice. Sex and money are often areas where our attitudes and practices need revision. What we are doing is shifting from an ego-centered to a God-centered orientation, and the shift is not always smooth.
Rigorous honesty shows up harmful relationships for what they are. It illumines our motives, which are not always the best. The love and care of our Higher Power support us as our weaknesses are exposed. Through His healing power, we are strengthened and made whole.
Grant me the ability to practice rigorous honesty in all areas of my life.
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One Day At A Time
HONESTY
“Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.”
Thomas Jefferson
Throughout my ups and downs in life and in working the Steps, I have discovered the importance of complete honesty. No matter what I feel or think, being honest about it with myself, others and God helps me to stay in a healthier state of physical, emotional and spiritual wellness. When I first started in the program, the idea of telling my Higher Power how I really felt was foreign to me. Sure I asked for help and “explained” what I was going through, but I didn’t often pour my heart out. I didn’t want to offend or burden God with complaints or weakness.
With the help of the Steps, I have let go of the formal prayers I learned in my youth and I more often tell God the way my life really is. Sometimes that includes sharing my negative attitude, crying, or just conversing casually with God. My Higher Power is full of acceptance and understanding and is pleased every time I share my honest thoughts and feelings with Him.
The years of denying and burying my feelings have resulted in an automatic reaction to not allow myself to feel or think straight in lots of situations. If I can take the time to identify exactly where I am and then honestly admit that to God and others (when needed), I have made progress.
Sharing my true self with a sponsor or in a meeting helps, too. It lifts the blinders from my eyes so that I can see my reality and proceed from there. If I hide from God, fool myself or deceive others, I rob myself of honesty which is the foundation of my progress towards serenity and wisdom.
One day at a time...
For today I will embrace my reality, the good and the bad. I will honestly admit my thoughts and feelings to myself, to another person and to God.
~ Susanne
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
In this way we tried to shape a sane and sound ideal for our future sex life. We subjected each relation to this test - was it selfish or not? We asked God to mold our ideals and help us to live up to them. We remembered always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly nor to be despised and loathed.
Whatever our ideal turns out to be, we must be willing to grow toward it. We must be willing to make amends where we have done harm, provided that we do not bring about still more harm in so doing. In other words, we treat sex as we would any other problem. In meditation, we ask God what we should do about each specific matter. The right answer will come, if we want it. - Pg. 69 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Even when our intentions are good, when we try to dominate the actions of others, we usually end up on a collision course with them. This hour, let us tend to our affairs and not the affairs of others.
Tolerance is my path to harmony with my fellows. May I be granted some tolerance this hour.
Fear of Change
Today, I am able to live with my fear that I will not like myself or those close to me if we change. Change is threatening, and healing and growing include change. It doesn't matter to my fearful self if the change is for the better or worse. In fact, change for the better can sometimes be even more threatening. I fear that I will not know how to act or have the tools to be with the 'better' without smearing my disease all over it. I remind myself today, again, that I do not have to grow perfectly. This is not an easy road, but the gains are so apparent that I will have faith that my tough times will come to an end.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Some members believe that our program is too idealistic and doesn't really apply in the 'real' world. They don't get the 'in all our affairs' part. If it works in any place, then it works in every place.
If I work my program in only one place, then I'm not working my program.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The miracle of recovery is that no matter where you are, you're here.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am at peace today, knowing that God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I try to keep my words palatable - I never know when I may have to eat them. - Anon.
bluidkiti
10-06-2021, 07:17 AM
October 14
Daily Reflections
A PROGRAM FOR LIVING
When we retire at night, we constructively review our day. . . . On awakening let us think
about the twenty-four hours ahead. . . Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking,
especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 86
I lacked serenity. With more to do than seemed possible, I fell further behind, no matter
how hard I tried. Worries about things not done yesterday and fear of tomorrow's
deadlines denied me the calm I needed to be effective each day. Before taking Steps Ten
and Eleven, I tried to focus on God's will, not my problems, and to trust that He would
manage my day. It worked! Slowly, but it worked!
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
How big a part of my life is A.A.? Is it just one of my activities and a small one at that?
Do I only go to A.A. meetings now and then and sometimes never go at all? Do I think of
A.A. only occasionally? Am I reticent about mentioning A.A. to people who might need
help? Or does A.A. fill a large part of my life? Is it the foundation of my whole life?
Where would I be without A.A.? Does everything I have and I do depend on my A.A.
foundation? Is A.A. the foundation on which I build my life?
Meditation For The Day
Lay upon God your failures and mistakes and shortcomings. Do not dwell upon your
failures, upon the fact that in the past you have been nearer a beast than an angel. You
have a mediator between you and God--your growing faith--which can lift you up from the
mire and point you toward the heavens. You can still be reconciled with the spirit of God.
You can still regain your harmony with the Divine Principle of the universe.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not let the beast in me hold me back from my spiritual destiny. I pray
that I may rise and walk upright.
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As Bill Sees It
FALSE PRIDE, p. 285
The alarming thing about pride-blindness is the ease with which it is
justified. But we need not look far to see that self-justification is a
universal destroyer of harmony and of love. It sets man against man,
nation against nation. By it, every form of folly and violence can be
made to look right, and even respectable.
*******************************
It would be a product of false pride to claim that A.A. is a cure-all,
even for alcoholism.
1. GRAPEVINE, JUNE 1961
2. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 232
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Walk In Dry Places
What is true sharing?
Sharing
Though it comes without a price, the sharing we undertake in the AA program has value without limits. When we share our experience, strength, and hope with others, we become both teachers and friends.
Sometimes we are led to believe that we should share our material goods with others, but all we learn is that this often fails to help anyone. Such sharing is not wrong, but it can be misused and misdirected.
In the form of sharing we practice, there can be only gain for all involved in the exchange. Our sharing of personal experience may be just what another person needs at the time. What also matters is that we need it and can benefit from it.
True sharing of this kid is one of the great secrets of AA's success. If our program isn't working well, perhaps we should do more of this sharing.
I'll seek to share my true feelings with others today, in the hope that this will help all of us.
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Keep It Simple
A baby is God’s opinion that the world should go on. ---Carl Sandburg
Recovery, is also God’s opinion that the world should go on. But when we used alcohol and other drugs, there were days when even the sight of a newborn baby couldn’t bring hope into our hearts. We were spiritually dead. We didn’t care if the world went on. We didn’t care about anything but getting high.
Through recovery, our souls come alive.
The beauty of a fall day can reach our hearts. We can see the miracle found in a baby’s eyes. We can see the beauty of the world. We can feel how much we’re loved by our Higher Power and by others. This is how we know we’re alive. Hope fills our minds and love fill our hearts.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, now that I again believe the world should go on, have me work to improve it. Have me be a person who makes the world more beautiful.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll notice the children and babies around me. I’ll notice how alive they are. I’ll try to be as alive as they are.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The balance between mind and spirit comes hard for me. The eternal split. Two entities, perfectly aware and yet perfectly unwilling to cooperate. --Mary Casey
The program directs our spiritual growth, a human aspect that had atrophied, if ever it had existed, for most of us before abstinence. And the process of developing our spiritual nature is painstaking. Living by our wits, or the fervent application of "situational analysis" had been our survival tools for months or years.
To return repeatedly to the old tools for quick solutions to serious situations is second nature. Learning to rely on spiritual guidance for solutions and to use it to sharpen our analytical focus takes patience and continual effort.
Within our spiritual realm we find our connection to God. We have been given the wisdom; all the knowledge we need is at our fingertips. The confidence to move ahead and offer our special talent to others comes from our Spirit. We are all that we need to be. Our mind and our Spirits, in concert, can tackle any challenge and succeed.
My mind and my Spirit can become compatible entities with the development of my trust in each. Knowledge plus courage can move mountains. I have been given both.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
When our friend related his experience, the man agreed that no amount of will power he might muster could stop his drinking for long. A spiritual experience, he conceded, was absolutely necessary, but the price seemed high upon the basis suggested. He told how he lived in constant worry about those who might find out about his alcoholism. He had, of course, the familiar alcoholic obsession that few knew of his drinking. Why, he argued, should he lose the remainder of his business, only to bring still more suffering to his family by foolishly admitting his plight to people from whom he made his livelihood? He would do anything, he said, but that.
p. 155
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I took a pitiful sales job that paid next to nothing, so I continued to live with my parents. I kept this job for two years for one reason--it allowed me to drink with minimal interference. My pattern was to pick up a fifth of whiskey somewhere during my round of appointments and keep it under the car seat with me. When I got home in the evening, I drank at least half the fifth in front of the television set and watched reruns until I passed out. And I did this every night, by myself, for almost two years. I had become a daily isolated drinker and was starting to get a little nervous.
p. 321
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Alcoholics especially should be able to see that instinct run wild in themselves is the underlying cause of their destructive drinking. We have drunk to drown feelings of fear, frustration, and depression. We have drunk to escape the guilt of passions, and then have drunk again to make more passions possible. We have drunk for vain glory--that we
might the more enjoy foolish dreams of pomp and power. This perverse soul-sickness is not pleasant to look upon. Instincts on rampage balk at investigation. The minute we make a serious attempt to probe them, we are liable to suffer severe reactions.
pp. 44-45
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I shall leap! No matter what is ahead, God is there to catch me.
--Shelley
One of the most valuable things we can do to heal one another is listen to each other's
stories.
--Rebecca Falls
Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding is the third.
--Marge Piercy
You get more than you give when you give more than you get.
--Cited in More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES
Much wisdom can be crowded into but four words:
In God we trust. This too shall pass. Live and let live. Still waters run deep. Bad news
travels fast. Love laughs at locksmiths. Nothing succeeds like success. Charity begins
at home. Politics make strange bedfellows. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Man
proposes, God disposes. Let sleeping dogs lie.
--Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
INDIVIDUALITY
"I am one individual on a small
planet in a little solar system in
one of the galaxies."
-- Roberto Assagioli
Spirituality develops a humility that is realistic. Realism teaches me that I am one among
many. That does not mean that I am less than anybody else, but it certainly doesn't mean
that I am above others.
Arrogance, fantasy and selfishness are characteristics of addiction that stop the
development of true individuality. To pretend to be something we are not, or have a
grandiose illusion about our own importance, misses the truth, misses our truth and
misses our individuality.
Humility is treating people with the respect we would want, giving people the freedom
we require in our life. Humility is perceiving our God-given talent and individuality.
I pray that I will remember that I am a "part of", rather than the sum total of this
universe.
************************************************** *********
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in
him shall not perish but have eternal life."
John 3:16
My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: and I give unto them
eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.
John 10:27-28
"The LORD will not allow the righteous soul to famish, But He casts away the desire of the
wicked."
Proverbs 10:3
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Daily Inspiration
Spend a little time each day taking care of your own physical and emotional needs and the rest of your day will be more effective. Lord, help me to enrich and care for myself so that I am not depleted of energy and health and have something within that I can use to enrich others.
Welcome God into every part of your life. He is always with you, ready to help, waiting to bless you with miracles and able to enrich your every moment. Lord, I call out your name often in praise, in thanksgiving and in every need.
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NA Just For Today
The End Of Loneliness
"With the love that I am shown in Narcotics Anonymous, I have no excuse for loneliness."
Basic Text p. 262
Addiction is a lonely disease. We may be surrounded by people but, sooner or later, our addiction drives a wedge between us and even our closest loved ones. Many of us are driven to Narcotics Anonymous by a desperate loneliness.
Though we may approach the rooms of NA with caution and suspicion, we are welcomed with a hug, a smile, and a warm "keep coming back." This may be the first place where we have felt welcome in a long, long while. We watch other members talking and laughing, leaving the meeting in groups for more talk at the local coffee shop. We wonder if we, too, could become a part of this loving bunch.
Our pattern of isolation can make it difficult for us to join in. Over time, however, we begin to feel "a part of" rather than "apart from." Soon, when we walk into the rooms, we feel at home. We begin to make friends and our lives start to change.
NA teaches us how to overcome our isolation. Through our first tentative friendships formed in our home group, we start to find that making friends isn't hard. A sense of belonging comes when we share ourselves with others.
Just for today: I am thankful for the friendships my Higher Power has given me in NA. Because of them, I am lonely no more.
pg. 300
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If you're never scared or embarrassed or hurt, it means you never take any chances. --Julia Soul
Do we avoid making new friends because we're scared they won't like us? Do we get embarrassed when we make a mistake and avoid trying again? When we get our feelings hurt, do we think we're bad, or that something is wrong with us?
Being scared or shy or hurt are all part of being alive. When we try to stay away from painful feelings, we keep ourselves from having many wonderful adventures. If we're afraid to meet new people, we may never have any close friends. If we stop trying when we're embarrassed, we may never learn a better way of doing things. And if we don't share our hurt feelings, we may never find out that everyone else has the same feelings we have.
What can I try again today that I failed at yesterday?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
No man is more cheated than the selfish man. --Henry Ward Beecher
When we're selfish, we close off the channels of exchange with others. Not only are we grabbing and holding all the goods or attention we can get, but we are denying others the possibility of sharing with us in the benefits. We may be selfish in material goods, but there are many other ways too. Some of us expect our spouses to meet our needs while we make little effort to meet theirs. Some of us discover our selfishness as we drive, refusing to yield a position to another car or getting furious if we lose a place in heavy traffic.
By contrast, our generosity and welcoming responses nourish the spirit within us and create a good environment for our growth. Sometimes giving does not come easily. We have a more generous spirit when we are in touch with our ultimate vulnerability. All of life is fragile, and we need each other to have a good life. We can truly hold onto nothing but ourselves. Giving what we can of our time, our energy, and our goods, helps create the kind of world we want to live in.
Today, I will look for ways to be generous with those I share this world with.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The balance between mind and spirit comes hard for me. The eternal split. Two entities, perfectly aware and yet perfectly unwilling to cooperate. --Mary Casey
The program directs our spiritual growth, a human aspect that had atrophied, if ever it had existed, for most of us before abstinence. And the process of developing our spiritual nature is painstaking. Living by our wits, or the fervent application of "situational analysis" had been our survival tools for months or years.
To return repeatedly to the old tools for quick solutions to serious situations is second nature. Learning to rely on spiritual guidance for solutions and to use it to sharpen our analytical focus takes patience and continual effort.
Within our spiritual realm we find our connection to God. We have been given the wisdom; all the knowledge we need is at our fingertips. The confidence to move ahead and offer our special talent to others comes from our Spirit. We are all that we need to be. Our mind and our Spirits, in concert, can tackle any challenge and succeed.
My mind and my Spirit can become compatible entities with the development of my trust in each. Knowledge plus courage can move mountains. I have been given both.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Controlling Versus Trust
There was a time in my life when I felt so afraid of and overwhelmed by the very act of living that I actually wanted to make out a schedule for each day of my life for the next five years. I wanted to include all the chores I had to do, when I would do them, even when I would schedule relaxation. I wanted to get some order into what felt overwhelming. I wanted to feel like I was in control. --Anonymous
Controlling is a direct response to our fear, panic, and sense of helplessness. It is a direct response to feeling overwhelmed, and to distrust.
We may not trust ourselves, our Higher Power, the Plan, the Universe, or the process of life. Instead of trusting, we revert to control.
We can approach this need to control by dealing with our fear. We deal with fear by trusting - ourselves, our Higher Power, the love and support of the Universe, the Plan, and this process we call life and recovery.
We can trust that when things don't work out the way we want, God has something better planned.
We can trust ourselves to get where we need to go, say what we need to say, do what we need to do, know what we need to know, be who we need to be, and become all we can become, when we are intended to do that, when we are ready, and when the time is right.
We can trust our Higher Power and the Universe to give us all the direction we need.
We can trust ourselves to listen, and respond, accordingly.
We can trust that all we need on this journey shall come to us. We will not get all we need for the entire journey today. We shall receive today's supplies today, and tomorrow's supplies tomorrow. We were never intended to carry supplies for the entire journey. The burden would be too heavy, and the way was intended to be light.
Trust in yourself. We do not have to plan, control, and schedule all things. The schedule and plan have been written. All we need to do is show up.
The way will become clear and the supplies will be amply and clearly provided, one day at a time.
Trust, my friend, in today.
Today, I will trust that I will receive all I need to get me through today. I will trust that the same shall happen tomorrow.
I can accept whatever I am feeling today. Without resistance my feelings pass and I am then open to experience whatever is next. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 14
Clear Out the Clutter
Have you ever noticed how easy it is to accumulate possessions and clutter in your home, things you pick up along the way? Have you ever noticed how easy it is to begin accommodating this clutter, getting used to it, thinking of it as just part of your environment?
It can be that way with our emotions,too. No matter how hard we strive to stay clear, we pick up bits of clutter along the way.
It’s so easy to ignore deeply embedded emotions and their impact on our lives. Many of us have undercurrents of old emotional energy that have been with us for so long we don’t see them. We don’t see the anger, the fear, the sadness. We’ve lived with these feelings for so long they have become embedded in us, part of us. When one of these nudges us, we tuck it back in, pack it away, and go on about our lives. But the feelings stays with us until we consciously acknowledge and address it. It affects us and our lives until we heal it.
Find a way to heal those old feelings, perhaps journaling or writing your memoirs. Whatever technique you choose to begin this journey of deep healing, deep cleansing, take the time to become conscious of what you really feel. Observe yourself; listen closely to yourself. Is there an edge to your voice? Do you talk about a particular person or place with a high degree of emotional energy? Learn to become comfortable with the rhythm of allowing these emotions to surface. They aren’t that hard to find. When it’s time to heal them, they’ll present themselves.
Release your fear of facing what’s there. Tap into that deeper part of you. Acknowledge your emotional energy, and heal.
Start cleaning house. Each piece of emotional clutter you clear out will bring you closer to your soul.
*****
more language of letting go
See Naturally
I was talking to a friend one day about using visualization as a tool to help create the present and the future we desire. Visualization, or using the spiritual energy of thought as a tool, can create physical reality.
"I don't really do that much," he said. "I'm not one for visualization."
Later, we were talking about a project we were working on together. He began to describe the next stage of the process. "I see us working together on it like this," he said. He described in great detail how he saw things coming to pass.
I listened. When he finished, I told him, "You said you don't use visualization as a tool. But you just used it naturally, without thinking, to describe how we are going to work on the next stage of this project."
He thought for a moment, then said he guessed I was right.
Don't talk yourself out of using visualization as a tool. Most of us often use our imagination to consider things that are taking place now or in the future. Be aware of what you say and see, so that you can use this powerful tool, your imagination, to help create whatever it is that you really want to see.
Pay attention to the ways you use your imagination in your daily life, the number of times you naturally say how you see things working out. If you find yourself using your imaginative powers to create negative events, stop! Erase that scene and create something else.
God, help me become aware of how I see naturally. Help me use and respect my imagination as the powerful creative tool it is.
*****
Blue Skies
The Sky Is Blue Even on a Cloudy Day
When we refer to a “beautiful day,” we are often describing a day that is sunny, clear, and without a cloud in sight to mar a sky that is a brilliantly perfect blue. We find ourselves bouncing along, light in spirit, free from worries, and enjoying the moment. That is, until the clouds begin to form. The sky may turn grey, and a fog may roll in. Puffs of white take on whimsical, darker shades, and our beautiful day disappears along with the sunshine… or so it seems.
A clear blue sky often inspires in us good cheer, bringing on a lighter, more carefree day. We may find ourselves spending time outdoors, breathing in the fresh air, and basking in the warmth of the sun. Yet should clouds appear to wash the sky with shadows, we may let this change of weather decrease our energy and enthusiasm, pulling us into our own cloudy funk. Darker days are just as much a part of life as are the days graced with sunshine. They show us a different perspective of our world, while helping us appreciate the moments of illumination that inevitably follow. A rainy day with clouds helps to clear the air, washing away stagnation. Still, it’s hard not to feel gloomy or think that the day has been ruined when there are clouds hanging over us. Yet if you can remember that these shades of grey won’t last forever, and that hidden behind the clouds is the blue sky, you will find that the beauty of your day is merely playing a game of peek-a-boo with you. Like the mis! haps and interruptions that occasionally block the brilliance that is our own lives from shining through, clouds eventually clear away so we can open up to a brighter horizon.
The next time you wake up to a cloudy day, remember that these shades of grey in life are there just for the moment. And that no matter how hard the rain falls or how chilly the fog is, the clouds will go away, the sun will break through, and you will be able to see the sky that has always and forever been a beautiful and brilliant blue. Published with permission from Daily OM
*****
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“Fundamental progress has to do with the reinterpretation of basic ideas,” wrote Alfred North Whitehead. When we review the ups and downs of our recovery in The Program, we can see the truth of that statement. We make progress each time we get rid of an old idea, each time we uncover a character defect, each time we become ready to have that defect removed and then humbly ask God to remove it. We make progress, one day at a time, as we shun the first drink, the first pill, the first addictive act that will so quickly swerve us from the path of growth to the road back to torment and despair. Have I considered the progress I’ve made since I’ve come to The Program?
Today I Pray
May I remember that there are few new ideas in this world, only old ones reinterpreted and restated. May I be always conscious that even the big things in life — like love, brotherhood, God, sobriety — become more finely defined in each human life. so may the Twelve steps of the Program be rescinded in each of our lives, as we keep in mind that, basically, these are time-tried principles — which work.
Today I Will Remember
The Twelve step work.
*****
One More Day
Nothing sharpens sight like envy.
– Thomas Fuller
It’s natural to want to own things — a house, a car, nice clothes, a boat. Once in a while we are able to save and buy some things we like, but more often we have to set priorities and choose which items really matter to us most.
Almost all of us know someone who does seem to have it all — materially — and we may be envious. Perhaps, at those times we can better serve our needs if we reexamine our values and cast our eyes toward other people who have the things we really want — peace of mind, a loving nature, spiritual depth, and unjealous nature. Those “things” may be what we should strive for to own. These qualities can be purchased only with time, and enrich our lives more than mere material objects ever could.
I will take inventory of my qualities, not my possessions.
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Food For Thought
Surrender
Continuing to take the first three Steps enables us to become increasingly surrendered to our Higher Power. Our goal is to let our egotistical selves be dissolved in a greater Self, so that the Higher Power lives through us. The loss of ego frightens us and attacks our illusions of self-sufficiency.
Here is where we can be grateful for our disease. If we were not convinced of our helplessness in the face of our obsession with food, we would not be desperate enough to surrender to a Higher Power. Only after we have tried and failed over and over again in our battle with compulsive overeating are we willing to accept the OA program.
We surrender in order to stop eating compulsively. We gain infinitely more than we had expected. Not only does our Higher Power give us abstinence from compulsive overeating, but also more than that He gives us Himself. No longer do we live as an isolated, weak self, but in us lives the Power of the universe.
May we surrender completely to Your power.
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One Day At A Time
Patience
“Patience and perseverance have a magical effect
before which difficulties and obstacles vanish.”
John Quincy Adams
When I first walked through the meeting doors, I wanted recovery and I wanted it now! Give me the magic wand, I’ll waive it, then get on with my life—I thought.
One of the most difficult things I’ve had to learn is the art of patience and allowing God to work within his own time while I do the footwork to the best of my ability. It is my belief that the universe and my Higher Power will order the next level of my physical recovery. Physical recovery does not grow without spiritual progress. This Program is a journey, not a crash-course in fad dieting.
When I struggled with bouts of pride connected to my levels of patience and God’s timing, I knew I was uncovering yet another character flaw that could delay my spiritual recovery. Spiritual recovery, as “Old-timers” have told us again and again, is the actual foundation of the program. The “inner” person will eventually make its way to the outer person.
One day at a time...
Today I will slow down, take a deep breath, and just remind myself that my Higher Power is in control and that my natural pattern will develop under His nurture, care, and control.
~ January
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
In our belief any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but he usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed. - Pg. 101 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
When intense cravings for our drug of choice overwhelm us, we immediately talk to another person in recovery, even late at night and people are going to bed. Our program teaches us to rely on each other and they will welcome the contact!
Give me the strength to contact another clean and sober person BEFORE I think of satisfying that craving.
Acting As If
There will be times when I do not feel up to things, when there seems to be too big a gap between who I think I am and who I want to be. I believe in being true to myself, in being basically honest. When I first try something new, it may feel as if I am trying on an article of clothing that doesn't quite suit me. But there is nothing wrong with acting 'as if.' I may need to practice new behaviors in order to become comfortable with them. Sometimes, when I allow myself to act 'as if,' the old me sort of falls away and makes room for something new. Children do this all the time, trying on different roles and playing with them. There is no reason to commit myself to a limited view of who I am.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Do not pay any attention if people accuse you of inconsistency. Of course you are! How else can you change? You cannot progress if you can't change and you can't change if you're always consistent. Practicing new behaviors is sometimes seen as inconsistent-be proud.
Practice makes progress.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
We do it the old fashioned way, we earn our recovery.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I can accept whatever I am feeling today.
Without resistance my feelings pass and I am then open to experience whatever is next.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
You can't save your face and your butt at the same time. - Unknown Origin.
bluidkiti
10-06-2021, 07:17 AM
October 15
Daily Reflections
MY CHECKLIST, NOT YOURS
Gossip barbed with our anger, a polite form of murder by character assassination, has its
satisfactions for us, too. Here we are not trying to help those we criticize; we are trying to
proclaim our own righteousness.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 67
Sometimes I don't realize that I gossiped about someone until the end of the day, when I
take an inventory of the day's activities, and then, my gossiping appears like a blemish in
my beautiful day. How could I have said something like that? Gossip shows its ugly head
during a coffee break or lunch with business associates, or I may gossip during the
evening, when I'm tired from the day's activities, and feel justified in bolstering my ego at
the expense of someone else. Character defects like gossip sneak into my life when I am
not making a constant effort to work the Twelve Steps of recovery. I need to remind
myself that my uniqueness is the blessing of my being, and that applies equally to
everyone who crosses my path in life's journey. Today the only inventory I need to take
is my own. I'll leave judgment of others to the Final Judge--Divine Providence.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Am I deeply grateful to A.A. for what it has done for me in regaining my sobriety and
opening up an entirely new life for me? A.A. has made it possible for me to take on other
interests, in business and in various other associations with people. It has made a full life
possible for me. It would perhaps be wrong if all my activities were limited to A.A. work.
It has made a well rounded life possible for me in work, in play and in hobbies of various
kinds. But will I desert A.A. because of this? Will I accept a diploma and become a
graduate of A.A.? Do I realize I could have nothing worth while without A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
There is only one way to get full satisfaction from life and that is to live the way you
believe God wants you to live. Live with God in that secret place of the spirit and you will
have a feeling of being on the right road. You will have a deep sense of satisfaction. The
world will have meaning and you will have a place in the world, work to do that counts in
the eternal order of things. Many things will work for you and with you, as long as you
feel you are on God's side.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have a sense of the eternal value of the work I do. I pray that I may not
only work for now, but also for eternity.
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As Bill Sees It
MASTERING RESENTMENTS, p. 286
We began to see that the world and its people had really
dominated us. Under that unhappy condition, the wrongdoing of
others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill us, because we
could be driven back to drink through resentment. We saw that
these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish
them away.
This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us
were perhaps spiritually sick. So we asked God to help us show
them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would
cheerfully grant a sick friend.
Today, we avoid retaliation or argument. We cannot treat sick
people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful.
We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us
how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 66-67
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Walk In Dry Places
Reading about ourselves.
Gratitude
It's not only the experiences of our fellow AA members that can help us in recovery. We should also be able to see ourselves in stories about troubled people in the grip of alcoholism and anger.
Quite often, if we're truly honest, we can even see ourselves in tragic accounts of alcoholics who harmed others during drunken rages or blackouts. We might have stopped short of such behavior, but could this have happened to us? We might read of a drunken driving accident, for example, and realize that we narrowly escaped one or might have caused one had we not found sobriety.
Reading such accounts gives us deep pity and sympathy for al the people involved. These stories make us realize that alcoholism has many victims in addition to those who are afflicted with the same disease. And we should be grateful that sobriety enabled some of us to stay out of such news stores and not add to the world's problems.
Whatever happens today, I'll at least be grateful that sobriety can keep me from causing the out-of-control situations I read about in the daily newspapers.
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Keep It Simple
Not to decide is to decide. ---Harvey Cox
We are winners, because everyday we decide to stay sober. Every day we decide to listen to our Higher Power. We win by making active choices. We’ve stopped acting as if we have no choice. Our old way was to us by accident. Not true. We pretend we had no power. Also not true. We lost our power over alcohol and other drugs, but we still had the power to ask for help. Each time we used chemicals was a decision, just as to stay sober each day is a decision.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thanks for giving me choices. I will not run from them. Help me make good choices. Help me decide every day to listen to you.
Action for the Day: Not for one minute will I pretend I am a victim. I’ll face my choices squarely and decide.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Flattery is so necessary to all of us that we flatter one another just to be flattered in return.
We are all deserving of unconditional love an d acceptance. And all the people in our lives, past and present, deserve our unconditional love and acceptance, too. However, it's doubtful that we either feel it all of the time from others or give it away.
It's human of us to find fault..... to have expectations that are too high. But for this we pay a price. Instead of experiencing our lives serenely, contentedly, flowing with what is, we often criticize, judge and feel generally disgruntled throughout the day. What a waste! We do have another choice, fortunately. We can let go and let God, and live and let live. Also we can recall, today and every day, that we are all special individuals in this world who are loved, fully, by our Creator.
The greatest contribution we can make to the lives of others is to be affirming. We can let our spouse, children, and friends know we care about them. That we love and accept them. The love that we also long for will come back to us. We thrill at being affirmed. And we will thrill at affirming.
It feels good to help another feel appreciated. Love and acceptance are my lifeline, from God around us all.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Being intrigued, however, he invited our friend to his home. Some time later, and just as he thought he was getting control of his liquor situation, he went on a roaring bender. For him, this was the spree that ended all sprees. He saw that he would have to face his problems squarely that God might give him mastery.
pp. 155-156
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition - Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
My behavior at this point was textbook: I was stashing bottles all over the house; sneaking drinks from my parents' small supply when I ran out; rationing the number of bottles I threw away at the same time so the trash bags wouldn't clink; refilling my parents' vodka and gin bottles with water; and so on. I had also resorted to videotaping my favorite reruns while I was watching them because I always blacked out before the ending.
pp. 321-322
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
If temperamentally we are on the depressive side, we are apt to be swamped with guilt and self-loathing. We wallow in this messy bog, often getting a misshapen and painful pleasure out of it. As we morbidly pursue this melancholy activity, we may sink to such a point of despair that nothing but oblivion looks possible as a solution. Here, of course, we have lost all perspective, and therefore all genuine humility. For this is pride in reverse. This is not a moral inventory at all; it is the very process by which the depressive has so often been led to the bottle and extinction.
p. 45
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Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
--Carl Jung
"Your family and your love must be cultivated like a garden. Time, effort, and
imagination must be summoned constantly to keep any relationship flourishing and
growing."
--Jim Rohn
I may not be where I want to be, but Thank God I am not where I used to be.
--unknown
I am at peace today knowing that God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself.
--Ruth Fishel
God, let my hard times be healing times.
--Melody Beattie
Hatred toward any human being cannot exist in the same heart as love to God.
--Dean William Inge
Prayer is the one thing that can make a change in your life. If you will go direct to God in
simple, affirmative prayer, you can heal your body, bring peace and harmony into your
life, and make well-being a reality.
--Emmet Fox
Don't quit before the miracle happens.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MAJORITY
"One man with courage is a
majority."
-- Thomas Jefferson
Alcoholism made me afraid of my shadow. I became so petrified with fear that I could
not enjoy my life. And I felt that I could do nothing. My disease told me I was helpless. I
existed in an atmosphere of doom and gloom.
Then I experienced a "moment" of sanity when I saw that I was the problem in my
life. My pain was being caused by my actions and attitudes. I took courage,
confronted the disease in my life and decided to take small steps towards recovery. I
have built my confidence on that "moment" of courage I took years ago. I am not an
island unto myself. I am not alone. God is with me in my life.
Teach me to have the courage to be what You have created. May I accept my
miracle.
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God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Psalm 46:1
Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that
He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.
Hebrews 11:6
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Daily Inspiration
It is very humbling to realize that often what burdens us the most would be very missed if it were taken away. Lord, I will take the time to appreciate my life.
Mistakes give us experience. Without them going forward is almost impossible. Lord, may I always look for the good and use it to make tomorrow better.
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NA Just For Today
Choices
"We did not choose to become addicts."
Basic Text p. 3
When we were growing up, all of us had dreams. Every child has heard a relative or neighbor ask, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Even if some of us didn't have elaborate dreams of success, most of us dreamed of work, families, and a future of dignity and respect. But no one asked, "Do you want to be a drug addict when you grow up?"
We didn't choose to become addicts, and we cannot choose to stop being addicts. We have the disease of addiction. We are not responsible for having it, but we are responsible for our recovery. Having learned that we are sick people and that there is a way of recovery, we can move away from blaming circumstances - or ourselves - and into living the solution. We didn't choose addiction, but we can choose recovery.
Just for today: I choose recovery.
pg. 301
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
. ..ere it vanishes
Over the margin
After it, follow it,
Follow The Gleam.
--Alfred, Lord Tennyson
It is difficult to find words for the "Gleam" we pursue. What it is, we are never too sure. We see it best in our daily dreams, while we're staring out a window at nothing at all. Sometimes it appears between the words in a book; it is always sure to be there when we sit alone to write down our own thoughts. We see it in the autumn woods; feel its heavy breathing in ocean waves. It is suddenly a skylark in flight, a falling leaf, a flower we have reluctantly picked. It makes us feel sad but good. It is always luring us on, always beautiful.
Is it love? Success? Peace? It may be any or all of these things, and we may find it through another person, or some talent we have, or a thing of beauty we stumble upon. And it is there within us, always, waiting to be found.
In what ways can I follow the Gleam I see in my life today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We know about remorse and death. But do we know about hope and life? I believe in life after birth! --Maxie Dunham
We do not need to create difficulties and pain in our lives. They come with the package of human existence. Some of us even feel bewildered when we aren't pressed by trouble. As we grew in recovery and our lives became better ordered, many of us thought, "Life seems to be going so well; I wonder what's wrong?" We were more accustomed to remorse and crisis than to joy and serenity.
What lies before us today is an unpainted picture. There are many possibilities for events to take a good turn. This, too, is part of the package, but we must believe and affirm the good things in order to accept them. When our only expectations are pain and trouble, they probably will be our only experiences. However, when we have faith that a better life is possible, we open ourselves to receive it.
Today, I will live with hope for the possibilities and accept the good things that come my way.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Character contributes to beauty. It fortifies a woman as her youth fades. --Jacqueline Bisset
How common it is for us to be overly concerned with our looks. The culture encourages it through our families, our friends, and the media. Many of us anguished over our looks in years past, and the pain of fading youth haunts some even now.
Perhaps it's time for us to take special note of the women we admire for their achievements. We should emulate them, honor them, and celebrate their particular beauty--a beauty generally enhanced by dignity, perseverance, and courage.
We can cultivate our special interests. They'll contribute to our achievements, which will add depth to our soul--the home of true beauty. Mature persons who acknowledge this true beauty are those we wish to attract into our lives. How fickle is the beautiful face! And even more fickle is the one who can see no deeper.
Youth and its beauty are fleeting. Not so the beauty of the developing character; time strengthens it. The program makes character development not only possible but also simple. Every Step, any Step, offers us an opportunity to take charge of our lives, right now.
I will remember, it's who I am inside that truly counts in the lives of others.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Chaos
No good work comes from unrest.
Unrest, fear, anger, or sadness may motivate us. These feelings are sometimes intended to compel action. But our best work emerges after these feelings have been replaced by peace.
We will not accomplish our task any sooner, or any better, by performing it out of a sense of urgency, fear, anger, or sadness.
Let go of unrest. Let peace fill the void. We do not have to forfeit our power, our God given personal power - or our peace - to do the work as we are called upon to do today. We will be given all the power we need to do what we are meant to do, when it is time.
Let peace come first. Then proceed. The task will get done, naturally and on time.
Today, I will get peaceful first, and let my work and life emerge from that base.
I have a quiet place within me where I can rest today, I have a quiet place where I can go that offers peace, comfort and healing. It is as close as this moment.... as close as a breath. This place is mine whenever I want it. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 15
Discover the Power of Vulnerability
A new kind of power will emerge from vulnerability. The more honest we are with ourselves about how we feel and what we really think, the more power we will have.
We may have once thought that being powerful meant not giving in to what we felt, what we thought, or who we really were. But that attitude didn’t garner power for us. It caused life, the universe, us to continue creating situations that would help open our hearts, help us to feel, help us learn the lesson of vulnerability.
The sooner we become honest with ourselves, the sooner we can be honest with others. The sooner we become honest with ourselves, the more quickly we’ll grow and move on to a new place. Become vulnerable, at least with yourself. Be honest about what you think and how you feel. Write it. Speak it. Feel it. Release it. Then you will know where to go, when to go. What you are to do next will emerge naturally, quietly, and clearly.
Try being absolutely honest. Reveal your most private feelings to yourself. It’s a new kind of power, a different kind of power. It is spiritual power, the power of opening the heart.
*****
more language of letting go
Look where you're going
"I have the controls!" Rob, my flight instructor said. He grabbed the yoke and turned the little Cessna away from an approaching plane. "Did you see him or hear him on the radio?" Rob asked.
"No," I said. "I was concentrating too much on the flight panel instruments inside to scan outside for other planes."
"The airplane wants to fly," Rob said. "Learn to feel what coordinated flight feels like so you won't need to be glued to the instruments. You need to be looking outside for other aircraft."
Sometimes we get so engrossed in the world inside our heads that we forget to look outside. We can become so involved with the minor details of a project, something we're trying to do, that we don't see the big problem coming at us until it crashes into us. We can get so absorbed in our emotions that we neglect the rest of our lives. We can become so engrossed with our agenda-- trying to get someone to like us, to get that job, to buy that house, or to control an outcome-- that we don't see the warning signs and realize that person, thing, or place might not be good for us.
Learn to feel your life and understand intuitively when you're on the right path. Be aware. Sometimes we can spot potential problems when they're still small and far away. If you can do this, then only minor corrections to your course may be necessary to avoid conflicts down the road.
Remember, the airplane wants to fly, but you've got to keep from hitting anything if you want a safe flight. Relax and look where you're going. That's how you stay on course.
God, help me become aware of danger signals before it's too late.
*****
Finding Answers Within
You Have All the Answers Within You by Madisyn Taylor
When you realize that you always have the answers within yourself, you can stop searching outside of yourself.
Many of us seek the answers to life’s questions by looking outside of ourselves and trying to glean advice from the people around us. But as each of us is unique, with our own personal histories, our own sense of right and wrong, and our own way of experiencing the world that defines our realities, looking to others for our answers is only partially helpful. The answers to our personal questions can be most often found by looking within. When you realize that you always have access to the part of you that always knows what you need and is meant to act as your inner compass, you can stop searching outside of yourself. If you can learn to hear, trust, and embrace the wisdom that lives within you, you will be able to confidently navigate your life.
Trusting your inner wisdom may be awkward at first, particularly if you grew up around people who taught you to look to others for answers. We each have exclusive access to our inner knowing. All we have to do is remember how to listen. Remember to be patient as you relearn how to hear, receive, and follow your own guidance. If you are unsure about whether following your inner wisdom will prove reliable, you may want to think of a time when you did trust your own knowing and everything worked out. Recall how the answers came to you, how they felt in your body as you considered them, and what happened when you acted upon this guidance. Now, recall a time when you didn’t trust yourself and the results didn’t work out as you had hoped. Trusting your own guidance can help you avoid going against what you instinctively know is right for you.
When you second guess yourself and go against what you know to be your truth, you can easily go off course because you are no longer following your inner compass. By looking inside yourself for the answers to your life’s questions, you are consulting your best guide. Only you can know the how’s and why’s of your life. The answers that you seek can be found when you start answering your own questions. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
All too often I unwittingly — and even unconsciously — set standards for others in The Program. Worse yet, I expect those standards to be met. I go so far, on occasion, to decide what progress other people should make in their recoveries, and how their attitudes and actions should change. Not surprisingly, when things don’t work out the way I expect, I become frustrated and even angry. I have to leave others to God. I have to learn neither to demand nor expect changes in others, concentrating solely on my own shortcomings. Finally, I mustn’t look for perfection in another human being until I’ve achieved perfection myself. Can I even be perfect?
Today I Pray
May God ask me to step down immediately if I start to climb up on any of these high places: on my podium, as the know-it-all scholar,; on my soapbox, as the leader who’s out to change the world; into my pulpit, as the holier-than-thou-could-possibly-be messenger of God; into the seat of judgement, as the gavel-banging upholder of the law. May God please keep me from vesting myself with all this unwarranted authority and keep me humble.
Today I Will Remember
A heavy hand is not a helping hand.
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One More Day
We cannot tear out a single page from our life, but we can throw the whole book into the fire.
– George Sand
During those darkest times, we may not be able to think beyond this moment, this pain, this loss. All we’re aware of is this tiny piece of time, and it casts its darkness on all we remember and all we see in the future.
This moment is a fraction of a lifetime; this feeling is just one perception amoung thousands we’ve experienced. We ow it to ourselves to be sure of what we are experiencing before discarding the entire book in order to rid ourselves of one hated page. If needed, we can explore our emotions with a professional. We can work within a group of people who understand. We can wait a while to see what our lives will hold. We can look for change outside and inside ourselves.
My feelings are real, but so is the chance that better things lie ahead. I pray for patience.
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Food For Thought
Cutting Cords
Often we are bound in unhealthy ways to parents, husbands, wives, children, and friends. When dependency and manipulation are masked as love, it is difficult to cut the cords that bind us. By ourselves we are unable to break free.
Listening to other compulsive overeaters helps us to see our own situation and ourselves more objectively. Working the steps builds emotional and spiritual maturity. Abstaining from compulsive overeating gives us the perception we need to see unhealthy relationships for what they are. Our growing self-respect motivates us to make changes.
We ate because we were too weak to face our problems. Now that we see where we have been manipulated and where we have manipulated others, we need the strength to cut the cords of unhealthy dependency. This strength comes from our Higher Power. Since we recognize our complete dependency on Him, we are no longer weakened by pseudo dependencies on those close to us. We learn to relate to them positively, out of God's strength rather than our own weakness.
By Your power, may I cut the cords that bind me.
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One Day At A Time
Learning New Ideas
“I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas.
I'm frightened of the old ones.”
John Cage
When I look back upon my life before I heard of food being a compulsion, I remember my old thinking -- which was not very thoughtful at all! I performed the task of feeding myself without any conscious forethought or planning. It was whatever was in sight, available, or easiest to fix. I never stopped to think why I eat what I eat. I don’t know what I was thinking when I consumed something that I knew would leave me feeling as though I were in a stupor or would send me crashing into naps that lasted hours.
My old ideas were mindless, thoughtless. I was an unhealthy automaton who had never been taught how to think about the “what” and “why” of her food choices. I have learned to listen to others who have recovery, take what I need from their stories, and apply some of their actions to my own life.
One day at a time...
I am willing to put aside old ideas as I discover them, to lay groundwork for the new ideas that have been presented to me, and to continue on a journey of personal growth. My mind is like a garden. I have to pull the weeds so that new flowers can begin to grow.
~ January K.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
There are those too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. - Pg. 58 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun!
Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to.
I Am Not Alone
Today, I know that, with God's help, I can do anything I need to do. When I feel alone or shaken up, I can ask for help within myself and know that it is there. Each of us is ultimately alone. Each of us has to learn our own lessons; that is, what we are here to do. We can't learn anyone else's lessons for them, and learning our own is difficult enough. To plow through my own psyche and face the insecurity and wounds that are there is all that I can handle. To try to live other people's lives for them is to separate myself from God because my first access to God is through and within me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You will be happy to know that the universal law that created miracles has not been repealed.
I am a realist. I count on miracles.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Call before you drink and we will help you stay sober. Call after you drink and you will help us stay sober.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I have a quiet place within me where I can go rest today.
I have a quiet place within me where I can go that offers peace, comfort and healing. It is as close as this moment, as close as a breath.
This place is mine whenever I want it.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I realized I had a body which can't tolerate alcohol, which is OK. except that I had a mind that can't leave it alone. I'd always said that I could take it or leave it alone - I couldn't do either. - Doug D.
bluidkiti
10-06-2021, 07:18 AM
October 16
Daily Reflections
THROUGHOUT EACH DAY
This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84
During my early years in A.A. I saw Step Ten as a suggestion that I periodically look at
my behavior and reactions. If there was something wrong, I should admit it; if an apology
was necessary, I should give one. After a few years of sobriety I felt I should undertake
a self-examination more frequently. Not until several more years of sobriety had elapsed
did I realize the full meaning of Step Ten, and the word "continued." "Continued" does
not mean occasionally, or frequently. It means throughout each day.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
How seriously do I take my obligations to A.A.? Have I taken all the
good I can get out of it and then let my obligations slide? Or do I constantly feel a
deep debt of gratitude and a deep sense of loyalty to the whole A.A. movement? Am I
not only grateful but also proud to be a part of such a wonderful fellowship, which is
doing such marvelous work among alcoholics? Am I glad to be a part of the great
work that A.A. is doing and do I feel a deep obligation to carry on that work at
every opportunity? Do I feel that I owe A.A. my loyalty and devotion?
Meditation For The Day
If your heart is right, your world will be right. The beginning of all
reform must be in yourself. It's not what happens to you, it's how you take it. However
restricted your circumstances, however little you may be able to remedy financial
affairs, you can always turn to your inward self and, seeing something not in order
there, seek to right it. And as all reform is from within outward, you will always find
that the outward is improved as the inward is improved. As you improve yourself,
your outward circumstances will change for the better. The power released from within
yourself will change your outward life.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that the hidden power within me may be released. I pray that I may not imprison
the spirit that is within me.
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As Bill Sees It
ASPECTS OF SPIRITUALITY, p. 287
"Among A.A.'s there is still a vast amount of mix-up respecting
what is material and what is spiritual. I prefer to believe that it is all
a matter of motive. If we use our worldly possessions too selfishly,
then we are materialists. But if we share these possessions in
helpfulness to others, then the material aids the spiritual."
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"The idea keeps persisting that the instincts are primarily bad and
are the roadblocks before which all spirituality falters. I believe that
the difference between good and evil is not the difference
between spiritual and instinctual man; it is the difference between
proper and improper use of the instinctual. Recognition and right
channeling of the instinctual are the essence of achieving
wholeness."
1. LETTER, 1958
2. LETTER, 1954
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Walk In Dry Places
Homeless and unemployed
Economic Insecurity
Alcoholism isn't the sole cause of the homelessness and unemployment that troubles our world. Even in sobriety, people can lose their jobs and homes, through no fault of their own.
Recovery makes it less likely that we will cause such conditions in our own lives. Beyond that , by keeping sober, we will be better able to deal with any setbacks that do occur. It is a painful fact that it is almost impossible to help any destitute alcoholic find a home or employment unless he or she stops drinking. We learn that much through our experience.
Our true home is with our Higher Power, and our best work bay be in the sharing of our experience and strength with others. Remembering this, we can be sympathetic and understanding about the general problems of homelessness and unemployment. We don't have the complete answer, but we do have answers.
I'll be grateful and understanding in any consideration of today's problems of homelessness and unemployment. By staying sober, I am at least helping to alleviate some of the general problems.
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Keep It Simple
To err is human, but when the eraser wears out ahead of the pencil, you’re overdoing it. --Josh Jenkins
It’s okay to make mistakes. But we shouldn’t live a life of excuses. We shouldn’t slide over our mistakes; we should learn from them.
Excuses keep us part from ourselves and others. People don’t trust us if we won’t admit and accept our mistakes. Relying on excuses dooms us to repeat the same mistakes.
In recovery, we admit and accept our behavior. We do this by continuing to take an inventory of our lives. We do this so we can learn from our mistakes. “Owning” our mistakes helps us grow.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me own my mistakes. Thank-you for Step Ten and the growth it holds for me.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list my five favorite excuses. I’ll think of the last time I used each of these. What was I trying to avoid.
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Each Day a New Beginning
History provides abundant examples of . . . women whose greatest gift was in redeeming, inspiring, liberating, and nurturing the gifts of others. --Sonya Rudikoff
Part of our calling as members of the human community is to unconditionally love and support the people emotionally close to us. We have been drawn together for purposes wonderful but seldom readily apparent. We need one another's gifts, compassion, and inspiration in order to contribute our individual parts to the whole.
Not only do we need to nurture and to inspire others, but also our personal development, emotionally and spiritually, demands that we honor ourselves in like fashion. Self-love, full self-acceptance is necessary before we can give anything of lasting value to someone else. Selflessly must we give to others if, indeed, our love and support are meant to serve, and giving anything selflessly is evidence of healthy self-love.
Selfless love liberates the giver and the recipient. Giving selflessly reveals our personal contentment, and it means we are free to nurture our own gifts.
It's good and right that I should encourage someone else today. I will pay the same respect to myself, too.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
One morning he took the bull by the horns and set out to tell those he feared what his trouble had been. He found himself surprisingly well received, and learned that many knew of his drinking. Stepping into his car, he made the rounds of people he had hurt. He trembled as he went about, for this might mean ruin, particularly to a person in his line of business.
At midnight he came home exhausted, but very happy. He has not had a drink since. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community, and the major liabilities of thirty years of hard drinking have been repaired in four.
p. 156
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
About this time the TV movie My Name Is Bill W., about the co-founder of A.A., was aired. Intrigued, I sat down with my whiskey and soda bottles to watch it. When Bill whipped out a flask in the car to bolster himself before his visit with his father-in-law, I heaved a sigh of relief. "Oh, I'm not that bad," I thought to myself. I then proceeded to get drunk and black out. I don't remember any more of the movie.
p. 322
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
If, however, our natural disposition is inclined to self righteousness or grandiosity, our reaction will be just the opposite. We will be offended at A.A.'s suggested inventory. No doubt we shall point with pride to the good lives we thought we led before the bottle cut us down. We shall claim that our serious character defects, if we think we have any at all, have been caused chiefly by excessive drinking. This being so, we think it logically follows that sobriety-- first, last, and all the time--is the only thing we need to work for. We believe that our one-time good characters will be revived the moment we quit alcohol. If we were pretty nice people all along, except for our drinking, what need is there for a moral inventory now that we are sober?
p. 45
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Listen in the silence. Listen and you shall hear God speak.
--Frater Achad
Life is for living, love is for sharing. Don't let the good things pass you by!
--Sue
The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
--David Russell
What I am is God's gift to me. What I make of myself is my gift to Him.
--unknown
G I F T = God Is Forever There.
--unknown
"The secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their
troubles."
--Unknown
Happiness is intrinsic, it's an internal thing. When you build it into yourself, no external
circumstances can take it away. That kind of happiness is a twenty-four-hour thing.
--Leo F. Buscaglia
The highest reward for a man's toil is not what he gets for it but what he becomes by it.
--John Ruskin
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CULTURE
"The great law of culture: let
each become all that he was
created capable of being."
-- Thomas Carlyle
We are capable of great things. This history of man, although surrounded by wars
and unspeakable acts of violence, is also the history of art, music, poetry and romance.
Each person is capable of great and noble acts --- but do we want to do them? We can be
honest, loving and caring people only if we choose to be that. The power of freedom and
choice is the determining factor in all our lives. Each culture has imaginative and creative
features, but it is the people that make them happen. Nothing will happen unless people
decide to make it happen.
So it is with the culture of recovery. The people who make up the recovering
community in all the addictions are the people who make a decision and acted upon it.
Talk is cheap and cruel unless it is followed by an event. Decisions must be made real.
We all have the capacity to be honest and kind.
May I not only be grateful for my culture but may I live to add something to it.
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The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love O Lord endures forever.
Psalm 138 : 8
"Lead me in your truth, and teach me."
Psalm 25:5
"Keep sowing the seed, for you never know which will grow, perhaps it all will."
Ecclesiastes 11:6
"He saved us, not because of the good things we did, but because of His mercy. He
washed away our sins and gave us a new life through the Holy Spirit.
Titus 3:5
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Daily Inspiration
Many of life's hassles are mere tests of our strength. Lord, help me remember that patience can often diffuse a situation quicker than a snap response.
Spend less time trying to change and more time making the best of who you are. Lord, help me daily to put Your words into action.
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NA Just For Today
The Simplest Prayer
"…praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."
Step Eleven
How do we pray? With little experience, many of us don't even know how to begin. The process, however, is neither difficult nor complicated.
We came to Narcotics Anonymous because of our drug addiction. But underlying that, many of us felt a deep sense of bewilderment with life itself. We seemed to be lost, wandering a trackless waste with no one to guide us. Prayer is a way to gain direction in life and the power to follow that direction.
Because prayer plays such a central part in NA recovery, many of us set aside a particular time each day to pray, establishing a pattern. In this quiet time, we "talk" to our Higher Power, either silently or aloud. We share our thoughts, our feelings, our day. We ask, "What would you have me do?" At the same time we ask, "Please give me the power to carry out your will."
Learning to pray is simple. We ask for "knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." By doing that, we find the direction we lacked and the strength we need to fulfill our God's will.
Just for today: I will set aside some quiet time to "talk" with my Higher Power. I will ask for that Power's direction and the ability to act on it.
pg. 302
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. --Matthew 6:34
To worry about something ahead of time is a waste of time and energy that could be better spent on living a full life today.
For instance, if we spend hours today worrying about an important test at school tomorrow, we can't very well concentrate on studying. And if we lie awake tonight agonizing over what we don't know or haven't studied, we're going to be exhausted tomorrow when we take the test.
Wouldn't it be much better to focus on doing all we can today to prepare for the test, and then, knowing we've done our best, let go of it tonight and get a good night's sleep? In fact, if we do that every day of the year, when a big test comes along, we'll know we're as ready as we can be, and won't have a thing to worry about. What a relief it is to know we've done our best today and every day.
What can I do well today so I won't worry about it tomorrow?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
One of the main reasons wealth makes people unhappy is that it gives them too much control over what they experience. They try to translate their own fantasies into reality instead of tasting what reality itself has to offer. --Philip Slater
We are constantly told that the way to happiness is through material possessions. "Men who drive this sports car have all the women after them!" "If I could only own this special tool it would make me happy!" What does a man really want? He wants a feeling that his life makes sense. He wants the give and take of loving relationships. He wants to feel he has a place in the world and can make a contribution. And he wants the feeling that he is not standing still, but growing in those ways.
Being poor certainly limits our options, but material wealth is an empty seduction. Putting all our energies into capturing wealth may make us rich, but it also can become an addiction that causes unhappiness. We become much richer in our souls and in our experiences when we take the risks that help us improve our relationships and teach us how to live balanced lives.
I will live each moment in ways that fit my true values.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
History provides abundant examples of . . . women whose greatest gift was in redeeming, inspiring, liberating, and nurturing the gifts of others. --Sonya Rudikoff
Part of our calling as members of the human community is to unconditionally love and support the people emotionally close to us. We have been drawn together for purposes wonderful but seldom readily apparent. We need one another's gifts, compassion, and inspiration in order to contribute our individual parts to the whole.
Not only do we need to nurture and to inspire others, but also our personal development, emotionally and spiritually, demands that we honor ourselves in like fashion. Self-love, full self-acceptance is necessary before we can give anything of lasting value to someone else. Selflessly must we give to others if, indeed, our love and support are meant to serve, and giving anything selflessly is evidence of healthy self-love.
Selfless love liberates the giver and the recipient. Giving selflessly reveals our personal contentment, and it means we are free to nurture our own gifts.
It's good and right that I should encourage someone else today. I will pay the same respect to myself, too.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Being Honest with Ourselves
Our relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we need to maintain. The quality of that relationship will determine the quality of our other relationships.
When we can tell ourselves how we feel, and accept our feelings, we can tell others.
When we can accept what we want and need, we will be ready to have our wants and needs met.
When we can accept what we think and believe, and accept what's important to us, we can relay this to others.
When we learn to take ourselves seriously, others will too.
When we learn to chuckle at ourselves, we will be ready to laugh with others.
When we have learned to trust ourselves, we will be trustworthy and ready to trust.
When we can be grateful for who we are, we will have achieved self-love.
When we have achieved self-love and accepting our wants and needs, we will be ready to give and receive love.
When we've learned to stand on our own two feet, we're ready to stand next to someone.
Today, I will focus on having a good relationship with myself.
Today I am following my own inner guide, know that I am coming from the best of who I am. That makes me feel good about me. That gives me great pleasure. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 16
Go for the Ride of Your Life
The roller coaster crawled slowly upward, inching toward the first and biggest hill. And suddenly we were screaming downhill at ninety-seven miles an hour. It is, they claim, the fastest roller coaster in the world. I laughed and yelled and clutched the handlebar. When the ride ended, the attendant turned to us as we were about to leave. “Would you like to go again?” he asked. “It’s the last ride of the night. “We all shouted yes and rode the course again, the wind whipping through our hair. When the ride ended, as all rides do, we sat in our seats and cheered.
Sometimes things happen. Things we didn’t expect. Things we didn’t plan on. An event occurs that changes our life dramatically. The event may be good or bad, desirable or undesirable, fortunate or unfortunate. No matter how we describe it, its impact is the same. We step off our usual path and go for a roller coaster ride.
You may have begun a time of deep transformation, a journey chosen by your soul. Feel all you need to feel. Allow your thoughts to flow. Let your body shift as you go through the curves. Let yourself be transformed. Enjoy the ride, the entire experience, with all its twists and curves. Scream in fear. Cry out in joy. Laugh aloud with glee.
If you find yourself on a roller coaster, turn it into the ride of your life.
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more language of letting go
You'll go where you look
There was only one tree in the landing area. Most of its leaves had been stripped away by the winter winds. I didn't want to hit it, but that's exactly what I did.
My parachute opened up right over the student landing area, a blessing for someone as new and unsure as I. I flew along the side of the field, turned onto the base leg, and then carefully turned into my final approach just as I'd been taught. There it was, the tree, its scrawny branches reaching up for me. It was all I could see from that point on. I couldn't take my eyes off of it. For a moment I thought I might clear it. "NO LOW TURNS, NO LOW TURNS," kept screaming in my ear as I drifted lower and lower, straight toward that tree.
I watched myself sink right into it.
Laughter and applause drifted out from the packing area.
Later another jumper pulled me aside to talk. "Do you know why you hit the tree?" she asked.
"Yes," I said. "It was in my way."
"There's more to it than that," she said. "You had plenty of time to turn out of the way of the tree. Instead, you watched yourself land right in it. You'll always go where you look. Look at something long enough to be aware of the potential for trouble, but don't fixate on the object. If you don't want to land on top of something, quit staring at it so hard."
Sometimes we get so focused on what we don't want and what we're afraid of, that's all we can see. We obsess about it, worry, and mull it around in our heads. It's all we can talk about, think, or feel. Then when we come crashing right into it, we wonder where we went wrong. After all, it was the very thing we had been trying to avoid.
The moral of this story is simple and sweet. Look at where you're going, but remember you'll go where you look.
Know what you don't want. Release your fears. Stay aware and alert to the dangers looming in your peripheral view. Your mind is more powerful than you might believe. If you put all your concentration and energy on something, that's exactly where you'll go.
God, help me stay aware and focus my energy on where you want me to go.
*****
Parts of the One
Ants and Bees, a Metaphor by Madisyn Taylor
We can learn a lot from watching ants and bees living in community and working for the greater good.
When we see ants and bees out in the world, we often see just one, but this belies the reality of their situation. More than any other species, ants and bees function as parts of a whole. They cannot and do not survive as individuals; they survive as members of a group, and the group’s survival is the implicit goal of each individual’s life. There is no concept of life outside the group, so even to use the word individual is somewhat misleading. Often, humans, on the other hand, strongly value individuality and often negatively associate ants and bees with a lack of independence. And yet, if we look closer at these amazing creatures, we can learn valuable lessons about how much we can achieve when we band together with others to work for a higher purpose.
Most ants and bees have highly specified roles within their communities, some of which are biologically dictated, and they work within the confines of their roles without complaint, never wishing to be something other than what they are. In this way, they symbolize self-knowledge and humility. They also display selfless service as they work for the common good. In many ways, they are like the individual cells of one body, living and dying as necessary to preserve the integrity of the whole body, not to protect themselves as individuals. In this way, ants personify the ability to see beyond one’s small self to one’s place within the greater whole, and the ability to serve this whole selflessly.
Ants and bees can inspire us to fully own what we have to offer and to put it to use in the pursuit of a goal that will benefit all of humanity, whether it be raising consciousness about the environment, feeding the hungry, or raising a happy child. Each one of us has certain talents we were born with, as well as skills we have acquired. When we apply these gifts, knowing that we are one part of a greater organism working to better the whole world, we honor and implement the wisdom of ants and bees. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Someone once said that the mind’s direction is more important than its progress. If my direction is correct, then progress is sure to follow. We first come to The Program to receive something for ourselves, but soon learn that we receive most bountifully when we give to others. If the direction of my mind is to give rather than to receive, then I’ll benefit beyond my greatest expectations. The more I give of myself and the more generously I open my heart and mind to others, the more growth and progress I’ll achieve. Am I learning not to measure my giving against my getting, accepting that the act of giving is its own reward?
Today I Pray
May I not lose sight of that pillar of The Program — helping myself through helping others in our purpose of achieving comfortable sobriety. May I feel that marvel of giving and taking and giving back again from the moment I take the First Step. May I care deeply about others’ maintaining their freedom from chemicals, and may I know that they care about me. It is a simple — and beautiful — exchange.
Today I Will Remember
Give and take and give back again
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One More Day
Don’t let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was
– Richard L. Eveans
There’s an old adage that good teachers still use: Start the child from where he is. In fact, we all have to begin from where we are. We may, at first, have a tendency to measure all our successes with our healthy life before our medical condition changed. Changed circumstances can play havoc with our lives.
Now we may have to set more realistic goals in order to reach them. We can still begin new jobs or new relationships. We begin over and over again throughout a lifetime — with or without a long-term medical situation. What matters most is how successfully we can handle the change. We’ll do fine as long as we remember we have started anew many times — successfully.
I will not discouraged by changes in my life. I have coped before, and I will again.
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Food For Thought
Admitting Wrongs
Step Ten reminds us to continue to take daily inventory and to promptly admit when we are wrong. By admitting our mistake out loud to the person we have harmed, we clear away bad feelings and guilt. The relationship is healed, and we are able to put the error behind us. Admitting that we are wrong helps us even more than the person we have injured.
Since it usually takes two people to disrupt a relationship, the entire blame may not be ours. Admitting our share of wrong, however, relieves us of guilt and opens the way to reconciliation.
Being able to apologize simply and sincerely means that we are not bound by pride and egotism. We do not always have to be right. By accepting our human fallibility, we are free to be ourselves, to make mistakes, to correct them, and to make amends.
Admitting wrongs keeps us honest with ourselves, with others, and with our Higher Power. We stay anchored in the real world and we practice healthy humility.
May I not be too proud to admit I am wrong.
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One Day At A Time
Fellowship
“When we honestly ask ourselves which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we
often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have
chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.
Henri Nouwen, Out of Solitude
When I first came into The Recovery Group's online meeting room nearly a year ago, I was bankrupt of mind, body and soul. I felt so unlovable that even I couldn't stand myself! I casually observed at the first few meetings and I was intrigued by the warmth of the fellowship there. After a few meetings I finally opened up and shared, "spilling my guts" about what it was like to reach bottom and to desperately need a hand to lift me up. After they heard my share, they told me they would love me until I could learn to love myself. That really blew me away! They told me they had been where I was and that they had found a means to recover. They assured me this program would work for me, if I really wanted it, and to follow their steps ~ their beloved Twelve Steps.
Shortly after joining, I got an online sponsor with whom I have been walking the path of recovery ever since. I eventually shared with her things I had spent a lifetime desperately longing to be able to tell another person, but had needed to keep shrouded in secrecy. Being heard and understood was the gift of a lifetime. The weight has been falling off, I have experienced a lot of emotional healing, and I am in a much better place spiritually. This fellowship, their steps and meetings, and my Higher Power have brought me a long way in a year's time!
One day at a time...
I will emulate those warm, wonderful people by welcoming newcomers with love and by helping them get started on the road to recovery. I will sponsor with the love and dedication that my sponsor has shown me.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Of course, this chapter refers to alcoholics, sick people, deranged men. What our friend, the vice president, had in mind was the habitual or whoopee drinker. As to them, his policy is undoubtedly sound, but he did not distinguish between such people and the alcoholic. - Pg. 149 - To Employers
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Whatever is on our mind at this time is probably something we can do nothing about just now. We're fighting a fatal disease here and our recovery is our TOP PRIORITY. Other considerations will simply have to wait.
Help me to prioritize my needs: clean time, sober time, recovery.
Lesson and Life
I recognize today that I am in charge of my own learning. Life is constantly offering up circumstances that are useful in my personal growth. I can move through the situation, live it out, extract the wisdom that is in it or repeat it over and over again, exhausting myself and learning very little. The deepest and most appropriate things I need to learn in life are generally right in front of me. Life is my guru if I can use it as such. It is rich with subtle learning if I look for it. The real achievement for me today is to learn to be in my own skin, to see truth in all that surrounds me, to know that placing value and judgment is pointless and illusory -- all of life is valuable.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
True morality is what we do when no one is watching. Growth is demonstrated by doing the right thing for the sake of doing the right thing.
I judge my growth by how good I am to people who can do nothing for me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
None of us came here on a winning streak.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am following my own inner guide, know that I am coming from the best of who I am. That makes me feel good about me. That gives me great pleasure.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Those who can't forget are worse off than those who can't remember. Anon.
bluidkiti
10-10-2021, 12:06 PM
October 17
Daily Reflections
A DAILY TUNE-UP
Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will
into all of our activities.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85
How do I maintain my spiritual condition? For me it's quite simple:
on a daily basis I ask my Higher Power to grant me the gift of
sobriety for that day! I have talked to many alcoholics who have
gone back to drinking and I always ask them: "Did you pray for
sobriety the day you took your first drink?" Not one of them said
yes. As I practice Step Ten and try to keep my house in order on
a daily basis, I have the knowledge that if I ask for a daily
reprieve, it will be granted.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
What am I going to do today for A.A.? Is there someone I should
call up on the telephone or someone I should go to see? Is there
a letter I should write? Is there an opportunity somewhere to
advance the work of A.A. which I have been putting off or
neglecting? If so, will I do it today? Will I be done with
procrastination and do what I have to do today? Tomorrow may
be too late. How do I know there will be a tomorrow for me?
How about getting out of my easy chair and getting going? Do I
feel that A.A. depends partly on me today?
Meditation For The Day
Today look upward toward God, not downward toward yourself. Look
away from unpleasant surroundings, from lack of beauty, from the
imperfections in yourself and in those around you. In your
unrest, behold God's calmness; in your impatience, God's
patience; in your limitations, God's perfection. Looking upward
toward God, your spirit will begin to grow. Then others will
see something in you that they also want. As you grow in the
spiritual life, you will be enabled to do many things that seemed too
hard for you before.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may keep my eyes trained above the horizon of
myself. I pray that I may see infinite possibilities for spiritual growth.
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As Bill Sees It
EMOTIONAL SOBRIETY, p. 288
If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will
find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its
consequent unhealthy demand. Let us, with God's help,
continually surrender these hobbling liabilities.
Then we can be set free to live and love; we may then be able to
twelfth-step ourselves, as well as others, into emotional sobriety.
GRAPEVINE, JANUARY 1958
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Walk In Dry Places
Driven by Fear
Finding courage.
During any group discussion of fear, someone usually points out that it serves a protective purpose by keeping us out of harm's way.
With the type of fear that drove us, however, we more often fled into further harm while trying to avoid the threats at hand. No person whose fear reaches a panic stage can effectively control his or her actions.
We cannot expect sobriety alone to make us exempt from fear. What it can do is give us an ability to handle our fear constructively.
There are steps to doing this. FIRST, we should not be too prideful to admit that fear can come to us. SECOND, we should admit it when we do feel fear. THIRD, we can discuss our fear with others while turning it over to our Higher Power.
It would be wonderful if these steps then lifted us above any sense of fear. Even if this doesn't happen completely, we've succeeded in mastering our problems if we don't let fear drives us to work against ourselves. If I am afraid to give a presentation for work or go for a job interview, for example, I am being driven into inaction. This must no be allowed to happen.
I can find courage today in the Twelve Step program. This will enable me to act properly and responsibly, even if I'm a bit queasy with fear.
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Keep It Simple
Every child is an artist. The problem is remain an artist once your grow up.---Pablo Picasso
We each have colorful ideas waiting to be shared. We’re alive inside. But do we let this side of us show? Our disease stole much of the child like openness. Many of us were taught that growing up meant denying the child within us. Many of us grew up in homes where it wasn’t safe to act alive and creative. Whatever the reason, it’s time to claim the child, the artist, in each of us. Each of our programs is different, and each has its artistic touch. When we tell our stories, we share our life. And our lives are unique and alive. The more alive we become, the more color we bring to others and ourselves. Let’s not be afraid to add color to our lives.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me claim the child inside of me. Joy is choice. Help me choose it.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll work at not hiding myself from others. I’ll be alive, and I’ll greet everyone I meet with the openness of a child.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Pride, we are told, my children, "goeth before a fall" and oh, the pride was there, and so the fall was not far away.
--Wilhelmina Kemp Johnstone
Requesting help. Admitting we are wrong. Owning our mistake in either a big or small matter. Asking for another chance or someone's love. All very difficult to do, and yet necessary if we are to grow. The difficulty is our pride, the big ego. We think, "We need to always be right. If we're wrong, then others may think less of us, look down on us, and question our worth." Perfectionism versus worthlessness.
If we are not perfect (and of course we never are), then we must be worthless. In between these two points on the scale is "being human." Our emotional growth, as women, is equal to how readily we accept our humanness, how able we are to be wrong. With humility comes a softness that smoothes our every experience, our every relationship. Pride makes us hard, keeps us hard, keeps others away, and sets us up for the fall.
I will let myself be human today. It will soften my vision of life.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
But life was not easy for the two friends. Plenty of difficulties presented themselves. Both saw that they must keep spiritually active. One day they called up the head nurse of a local hospital. They explained their need and inquired if she had a first class alcoholic prospect.
She replied, “Yes, we’ve got a corker. He’s just beaten up a couple of nurses. Goes off his head completely when he’s drinking. But he’s a grand chap when he’s sober, though he’s been in here eight times in the last six months. Understand he was once a well-known lawyer in town, but just now we’ve got him strapped down tight.”*
* This refers to Bill's and Dr. Bob's first visit to A.A. Number Three. See the Pioneer Section. This resulted in A.A.'s first group, at Akron, Ohio, in 1935.
p. 156
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
My parents were at a total loss. I was going nowhere and I was irritable and hostile. Since they had no experience with alcoholism, they had no idea what was wrong with me and or what to do about it, and neither did I. I knew I drank too much and that my life was miserable, but I never made the connection between those two conditions. My parents made the only suggestion that then made sense to them--they offered to help me financially if I wanted to go back to school. Seeing no other way out, I jumped at the opportunity.
p. 322
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
We also clutch at another wonderful excuse for avoiding an inventory. Our present anxieties and troubles, we cry, are caused by the behavior of other people--people who really need a moral inventory. We firmly believe that if only they'd treat us better, we'd be all right. Therefore we think our indignation is justified and reasonable--that our resentments are the "right kind." We aren't the guilty ones. They are!
pp. 45-46
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Acceptance does not mean that I have to agree, I don't have to approve, I don't even
have to like it. I just have to accept.
--unknown
"I can forgive, but I can not forget" is only another way of saying, "I will not forgive."
Forgiveness ought to be like a cancel note - torn in two and burned up so that it never
can be shown against one.
--Henry Ward Beecher
To carry a grudge is like being stung to death by one bee.
--William H. Walton
Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as it is, is the only
way of being happy.
--Jennie Jerome Churchill
Until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content with what you have.
--Doris Mortman
Ask not that events should happen as you will, but let your will be that events should
happen as they do, and you shall have peace.
--Epicetus
God's word refreshes our minds; God's spirit renews our strength.
--unknown
God is all-knowing, righteous, longsuffering, all powerful, and good."
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PROGRESS
You've got to be a fool to want to stop the march of time."
--Pierre Renoir
My fear of the future gave me a fear of change. My need to control made me avoid
any new or confusing ideas. My alcoholism wanted me to escape and hide in the
past--tomorrow was too fearful to be contemplated. At other times--and this is why
alcohol is cunning, baffling and powerful--I would want to escape into tomorrow
and avoid the reality of today.
Time and reality were to be "played with" rather than experienced. But time moves
on, it progresses just like the disease, and if I am to be a winner in this world, I need to
move with it. God is to be experienced in the march of time and today I want to be in
a relationship with God.
Teach me to respect time as an opportunity for growth.
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Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress.
Psalm 107:19
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we
are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us
an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but
on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Your principles have been the music of my life throughout the years of my pilgrimage. I
reflect at night on who you are, O LORD, and I obey your law because of this. This is my
happy way of life: obeying your commandments.
Psalm 119:54-56
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Daily Inspiration
Mistakes are often a great source of learning. Lord, may I treat myself kindly when I appear to fall short of my expectations and anticipate the goodness that often is not very obvious.
The source of courage is having a deep sense of God's presence and hearing Him say, "I am with you always.". Lord, You are my solution. You are with me always giving me all that I need.
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NA Just For Today
"The Truth"
"Everything we know is subject to revision, especially what we know about the truth."
Basic Text, p.91
Many of us thought we could recognize "The Truth." We believed the truth was one thing, certain and unchanging, which we could grasp easily and without question. The real truth, however, was that we often couldn't see the truth if it hit us square in the face. Our disease colored everything in our lives, especially our perception of the truth - in fact, what we "knew" about the truth nearly killed us. Before we could begin to recognize truth, we had to switch our allegiance from our addiction to a Higher Power the source of all that is good and true.
The truth has changed as our faith in a Higher Power has grown. As we've worked the steps, our entire lives have begun to change through the healing power of the principles of recovery. In order to open the door for that change, we have had to surrender our attachment to an unchanging and rigid truth.
The truth becomes purer and simpler each time we encounter it. And just as the steps work in our lives every day - if we allow them - our understanding of the truth may change each day as we grow.
Just for today: I will open my eyes and my heart to changes brought about by the steps. With an open mind, I can understand the truth in my life today.
pg. 303
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Fear makes strangers of people who should be friends. --Shirley MacLaine
No one is brave every moment; each of us feels awkward, shy, perhaps even ugly or dumb part of the time. If we could understand that about each other, it would make it easier for us to be friendly and willing to talk to someone new. Instead, we often sit back, waiting to be noticed; waiting for someone to invite us to join in an activity.
We are all so much alike, yet we are so certain we're different. Being self-conscious is normal. Even those who are the most popular suffer the same fears as the rest of us. The better we understand the ways we are the same, the easier it will be to make friends with someone new. And it's through friends that we grow and are strengthened for whatever lies ahead.
What new person can I offer friendship to today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I never suspected that I would have to learn how to live - that there were specific disciplines and ways of seeing the world I had to master before I could awaken to a simple happy, uncomplicated life. --Dan Millman
Wisdom begins in seeing how much we do not know. Sometimes it's a painful blow to our egos to face what we still have to learn. Many of us have believed we know how to live. Yet, when we look at our lives, we see something has been missing. When we continue to have great stress, when we haven't made progress in simplifying our lives, when our lives seem full of crises - perhaps then it is time to open ourselves to some new learning.
We can talk to sponsors and get ideas from group members. Perhaps they have noticed our blind spots and will tell us if asked. Expressing our problems in specific ways may point us to new learning. Our program teaches us twelve specific disciplines for our growth. We need to return to them again and again. We can always ask ourselves, "What Step am I working on at this time?" We may need to learn new ways to work on a specific Step.
I will turn to my fellow group members and focus on one Step for my growth today.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Pride, we are told, my children, "goeth before a fall" and oh, the pride was there, and so the fall was not far away.
--Wilhelmina Kemp Johnstone
Requesting help. Admitting we are wrong. Owning our mistake in either a big or small matter. Asking for another chance or someone's love. All very difficult to do, and yet necessary if we are to grow. The difficulty is our pride, the big ego. We think, "We need to always be right. If we're wrong, then others may think less of us, look down on us, and question our worth." Perfectionism versus worthlessness.
If we are not perfect (and of course we never are), then we must be worthless. In between these two points on the scale is "being human." Our emotional growth, as women, is equal to how readily we accept our humanness, how able we are to be wrong. With humility comes a softness that smoothes our every experience, our every relationship. Pride makes us hard, keeps us hard, keeps others away, and sets us up for the fall.
I will let myself be human today. It will soften my vision of life.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Feelings and Surrender
Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience.
Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience.
Acceptance, or surrender, is not a tidy package. Often, it is a package full of hard feelings - anger, rage, and sadness, followed by release and relief. As we surrender, we experience our frustration and anger at God, at other people, at ourselves, and at life. Then we come to the core of the pain and sadness, the heavy emotional burden inside that must come out before we can feel good. Often, these emotions are connected to healing and release at a deep level.
Surrender sets the wheels in motion. Our fear and anxiety about the future are released when we surrender.
We are protected. We are guided. Good things have been planned. The next step is now being taken. Surrender is the process that allows us to move forward. It is how our Higher Power moves us forward. Trust in the rightness of timing, and the freedom at the other end, as you struggle humanly through this spiritual experience.
I will be open to the process of surrender in my life. I will allow myself all the awkward and potent emotions that must be released.
Today I look to my Higher Power for strength, courage and direction. I gather my own strength and confidence from all possible resources and follow my own inner voice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 17
Feeling Overwhelmed Is a Trap
Feeling overwhelmed is a trap, a tricky one at that. When we’re overwhelmed, we see all that needs to be done and say, That’s too much. I can’t do it. So instead, I shall do nothing. Feeling overwhelmed occurs when we say, I am already too busy so I can’t do that and now all is pressing in on me and I can’t do anything. And the acts that are ours to do keep piling up and pulling on us. And we keep resisting. And stress and pressure build up.
Feeling overwhelmed leads to feeling stuck, and both are an illusion. How simple those things that overwhelm us actually become when we release the feeling and return to the rhythm of our lives. When we say, Yes, I need to make that phone call, do that task. How simple the task becomes, how simple life becomes.
What’s bothering you that needs to be done? What’s pulling on you? What’s causing you to feel overwhelmed and maybe stuck, too? Make a list. Put your list aside, and begin by taking one simple action. Then watch as life unfolds. One act at a time, one thing at a time, all that needs to be done will get done. The stress will disappear, and you’ll feel back on track.
You’ll be given the ability, power, and guidance to do all that is on your path to do. Begin simply, quietly, by acknowledging feeling overwhelmed. Denying the pull of life and its tasks doesn’t remove stress, it compounds it.
Surrendering to the simple truths, even the simple truth of what we’re really feeling, will always set us free.
*****
more language of letting go
The beauty is easy to see
It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.
--Ursula K. Le Guin
One lesson road trips have taught me is that while it's good to have a destination, it's good to see what the trip has to offer rather than waiting for it to bring us what we expected.
Recently, a friend and I made a trip to Santuario de Chimayo to visit the church and bring home some of the healing dust from the sacred place. Along the way, we planned to pass through other beautiful places in the Southwest, a spiritual pilgrimage we thought. We left the house ready to be enlightened. But something happened. In the hot Arizona air, we stopped letting the trip happen and started looking for a specific experience. The Indian ruins were overrun with tourist groups, and the beautiful red rock vortex center had been reduced to strip malls and time-share condos. Or spiritual quest had yielded nothing but disappointment so far. We felt antsy, irritable, and let down.
Then we saw the sign Meteor Crater road next right. We turned down that road, giving in to the cheesy kitsch of the trip. A mile wide and over five hundred feet deep the crater was left over fifty thousand years ago in the middle of what is now the Arizona desert. A man bought the land and he and his family became meteor experts-- marketing experts as well since they now charge ten dollars to see a big hole in the ground. Nice enough folks though, and we smiled for the first time on the trip.
I'd always wanted to see the Petrified Forest, Though I feared that once again the hype would overpower the reality of what it was. It didn't. The giant log-turned-to-stone were scarce but the place had a powerful timelessness to it. The sky was pastel blue. I lay on a giant wave of sand while Chip ran around taking pictures that would end up overexposed.
Later that evening we crossed the border into New Mexico. Chelle's-- a nice place to eat read the sign on the side of a building in Gallup. And it was nice, just like the sign said.
We can search for joy and enlightenment so frantically that we don't see the brilliance at our own feet. Sometimes in the search for enlightenment, it helps to remember to lighten up. To paraphrase Winnie the Pooh, if you're looking for enlightenment and only find the ordinary, then try looking at the ordinary and let it be what it is. You might then find something you weren't looking for, which might be just what you were looking for when you began.
Don't let your hopes and expectations be so high that you miss the beauty in what is. Joy and enlightenment, after all, aren't that hard to see.
God, help me let go of my expectations and delight in what is.
*****
Apologies
Empowered Forgiveness by Madisyn Taylor
If we can remember that our response to others is important, we can realize that trust and forgiveness go hand in hand.
In life there will always be times when we are affected by the actions of another person. When this happens, we often receive an apology. More often than not we say, “It’s alright,” or “ It’s okay,” and by saying this we are allowing, accepting, and giving permission for the behavior to happen again. When we say “thank you,” or “I accept your apology,” we are forced to sit in our feelings rather than ignore them.
There are many of us who feel that it is easier to brush off how we really feel than to express our discomfort with something that has happened to us. While this may initially seem like the best thing to do, what it really does is put us into an unending pattern of behavior; since we are not honest with another person, we continue the cycle of letting them overstep our emotional limits time and time again. By doing this we place ourselves in the position of victim. We can put an end to this karmic chain by first acknowledging to the other person that we accept their request for forgiveness; often a simple “thank you” is enough. To truly create a greater sense of harmony in our relationship, however, we need to gently, and with compassion, express our innermost concerns about what has transpired. By taking a deep breath and calling upon the deepest parts of our spirit, we can usually find the right words to say and verbalize them in a way that lets the other person recognize the consequences of what they have done.
If we can remember that our response to others is important, we can begin to realize that trust and forgiveness go hand in hand. And when we react in a way that engenders a greater amount of honesty and candor, we will establish a more positive and empowering way of being and interacting others. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Now that we’re sober and living in reality, it’s sometimes difficult to see ourselves as others see us and, in the process, determine how much progress we’ve made in recovery. In the old days, the back-of-the-bar mirror presented us with a distorted and illusory view of ourselves; the way we imagined ourselves to be and the way we imagined ourselves to appear in the eyes of others. A good way for me to measure my progress today is imply to look about me at my friends in The Program. As I witness the miracle of their recoveries, I realize that I’m part of the same miracle — and will remain so as long as I’m willing. Am I grateful for reality and the Divine miracle of my recovery?
Today I Pray
May god keep my eyes open for miracles — those marvelous changes that have taken place in my own life and in the lives of my friends in the group. May I ask no other measurement of progress than a smile I can honestly mean and a clear eye and a mind that can, at last, touch reality. May my own joy be my answer to my question. “How am I doing?”
today I Will Remember
Miracles measure our progress: Who needs more?
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One More Day
Maturity: among other things — not to hide one’s strength out of fear and consequently live below one’s best.
– Dag Hammarskjold
The fear of being different is a powerful force in our lives, especially in the early times after a chronic illness is diagnosed. We fear being recognized as a victim of an illness, and we become afraid of any recognition at all.
We don’t want to live with this unreasonable fear, and we begin to understand that healthy thinking requires us to develop and use our many strengths. We stop denying and start accepting. The voice of our individuality begins to speak, loudly and clearly, and we answer with definitive action. We start to face our problems, to accept the ways in which we differ from others, and to rejoice in our strengths.
I won’t hid my strengths, for they are the means to life at its best.
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Food For Thought
Seeking the Best
We will never be satisfied with less than the best. When we were overeating, we may have settled for less than we were capable of being and achieving, but we were not happy about it. There is something in each of us that hungers for maximum growth and development.
When we stop drugging ourselves with food, we become aware of new possibilities and areas of growth. By controlling our disease, we release potential that had been buried under our obsession. As we come to know our Higher Power through this program, our appetite for the best is reawakened. Though we realize we will never achieve perfection, we are challenged to be and do the best that we can, just for today.
The best force there is directs lives that are committed to the care of God. Only by dedication to knowing and doing His will is our search satisfied.
We seek You, Lord.
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One Day At A Time
Self-sabotage
“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur
when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled.
For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are
likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.”
M. Scott Peck
For the last fifteen years I have been an avid and restless student of “self-help.” I read popular books, spent years in therapy, and attended various support groups. Because I didn’t see any improvement in my life, I was consumed with anger, shame, bitterness, and a pervasive sense of injustice. I blamed my Higher Power, my family, my partner, and my life circumstances. Only since joining The Recovery Group have I discovered the source of my toxic stagnation. It was myself. When doing a thorough examination of my life, I was absolutely shocked to find that I had been repeatedly practicing destructive acts of self-sabotage.
I was in love with my suffering. I was addicted to my misery. Sometimes we cling to our illnesses and weaknesses because they are so familiar to us. Though they hurt us, we find them oddly comforting. It's what we're used to. And change is scary. The unknown is scary. I found that my self-sabotage stemmed from shame, anger, low self-esteem, my lust for being a Victim -- and even a Fear of Being Well. I had to reach the profound darkness of depression before I could admit that the damage I did to myself had become unbearable.
Now I make a choice each day to not sabotage myself. It's not easy. Rather than being my enemy, I choose to be my friend and advocate. With the help of this program and my friends in recovery, I have come to like myself and to truly want good things for myself. The changes are gradual and require me to be patient and gracious with myself. Now I can celebrate each baby step and forgive myself when I fall back into old patterns. I now know that when I do make a mistake, I can admit it, learn from it, and press forward with my Recovery.
One day at a time...
I will choose to accept myself as a person of worth. I will resist temptations to sabotage my recovery and I will choose good things for my life.
~ Lisa
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If any feel that as psychiatrists directing a hospital for alcoholics we appear somewhat sentimental, let them stand with us a while on the firing line, see the tragedies, the despairing wives, the little children; let the solving of these problems become part of their daily work, and even of their sleeping moments, and the most cynical will not wonder that we have accepted and encouraged this movement. we feel, after many years of experience, that we have found nothing which has contributed more to the rehabilitation of these men than the altruistic movement now growing up among them. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Let us speculate on another subtle 'trick' of our disease: It lies to us! 'It wasn't so bad; I'm not really out of control; everyone drinks a little; these people are stupid.' These are lies.
I pray that the subtle lies of addiction go in one ear and out the other!
Amends
Today, I am willing for healing to take place in ruptured relationships. I have been doing the best that I can. My acknowledgment that I may have hurt someone else does not diminish me. I have also been hurt, and I extend the same understanding to myself that I do to others. We have all been doing the best that we knew how with the awareness we had to work with. My willingness to make amends speaks to my spiritual growth and desire for honesty. Making amends to others sets things straight with myself. My self-respect is growing to the extent that I am no longer comfortable with unfinished business. I will finish up my side for my own self and allow the rest to be where it is. It is for myself that I forgive; I do not need to control the result.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Before spiritual awakening...work steps, make coffee, carry the message. After spiritual awakening...keep working steps, keep making coffee, keep carrying the message. -Zen for the 12 Steps-
Enlightenment is my ego's greatest disappointment.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Do not put the sole purpose of any fellowship above the soul purpose.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I look to my Higher Power for strength, courage and direction. I gather my own strength and confidence from all possible resources and follow my own inner voice.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
It doesn't matter so much who is right but what is right. I don't get indigestion from swallowing my pride. Anon.
bluidkiti
10-10-2021, 12:07 PM
October 18
Daily Reflections
AN OPEN MIND
True humility and an open mind can lead us to faith . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 33
My alcoholic thinking led me to believe that I could control my drinking, but I couldn't.
When I came to A.A., I realized that God was speaking to me through my group. My mind
was open just enough to know that I needed His help. A real, honest acceptance of A.A.
took more time, but with it came humility. I know how insane I was, and I am extremely grateful
to have my sanity restored to me and to be a sober alcoholic. The new, sober me is a much
better person than I ever could have been without A.A.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Have I got over most of my sensitiveness, my feelings which are too easily hurt, and my
just plain laziness and self-satisfaction? Am I willing to go all out for A.A. at no matter what
cost to my precious self? Is my own comfort more important to me than doing the things
that need to be done? Have I got to the point where what happens to me is not so
important? Can I face up to things that are embarrassing or uncomfortable if they are
the right things to do for the good of A.A.? Have I given A.A. just a small piece of myself?
Am I willing to give all of myself whenever necessary?
Meditation For The Day
Not until you have failed can you learn true humility. Humility arises from a deep sense of
gratitude to God for giving you the strength to rise above past failures. Humility is not
inconsistent with self-respect. The true person has self-respect and the respect of others
and yet is humble. The humble person is tolerant of other's failings, and does not have a
critical attitude toward the foibles of others. Humble people are hard on themselves and
easy on others.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be truly humble and yet have self-respect. I pray that I may see the good
in myself as well as the bad.
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As Bill Sees It
WHEN CONFLICTS MOUNT, p. 289
Sometimes I would be forced to look at situations where I was
doing badly. Right away, the search for excuses would become
frantic.
"These," I would exclaim, "are really a good man's faults." When
that pet gadget broke apart, I would think, "Well, if those people
would only treat me right, I wouldn't have to behave the way I
do." Next was this: "God well knows that I do have awful
compulsions. I just can't get over this one. So He will have to
release me." At last came the time when I would shout, "This, I
positively will not do! I won't even try."
Of course, my conflicts went right on mounting, because I was
simply loaded with excuses, refusals, and outright rebellion.
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Walk In Dry Places
Those who want it, Not those who need it.
Honest Desire
In the first bloom of sobriety, many recovering people confront drinking companions who also "need" the program. They're often surprised and disillusion when efforts to help their friends are rejected... sometimes curtly.
We're truly limited to helping those who desire recovery, not those who we think need it. Though intervention methods can be effective, we're still largely helpless to assist those who don't desire recovery.
We regret that we really have no answers for the millions who perish from alcoholism, unaware of their problem. We also can hold out little hope that any future recovery attempts will succeed without the individual alcoholic's cooperation.
Desire..... a personal determination and decision.... is necessary for almost any kind of change. We have the freedom to choose in many areas of our lives, and alcoholics must eventually choose recovery in order to find and maintain it.
Though I'd love to see others recover, I must accept the fact that their personal desire and choice is necessary. I'll remember this if any opportunities arise today to carry the message.
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Keep It Simple
When people bother you in any way, it is because their souls are trying to get your divine attention and your blessing.
--Catherine Ponder
We are in constant communication with one another and with God in the spiritual realm. No matter how singular our particular course may appear, our path is running parallel to many paths. And all paths will intersect when the need is present. The point of intersection is the moment when another soul seeks our attention. We can be attentive and loving to the people seeking our attention. Their growth and ours is at stake,
We can be grateful for our involvement with other lives. We can be mindful that our particular blessing is like no one else's and that we all need input from the many significant persons in our lives. There is no insignificant encounter in our passage through life. Each juncture with someone else is part of the destiny of both participants.
I will look carefully and lovingly at the people around me today and bless them, one and all. They are in my life because they need to be. I, likewise, need them.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Pride, we are told, my children, "goeth before a fall" and oh, the pride was there, and so the fall was not far away. --Wilhelmina Kemp Johnstone
Requesting help. Admitting we are wrong. Owning our mistake in either a big or small matter. Asking for another chance or someone's love. All very difficult to do, and yet necessary if we are to grow. The difficulty is our pride, the big ego. We think, "We need to always be right. If we're wrong, then others may think less of us, look down on us, and question our worth." Perfectionism versus worthlessness.
If we are not perfect (and of course we never are), then we must be worthless. In between these two points on the scale is "being human." Our emotional growth, as women, is equal to how readily we accept our humanness, how able we are to be wrong. With humility comes a softness that smoothes our every experience, our every relationship. Pride makes us hard, keeps us hard, keeps others away, and sets us up for the fall.
I will let myself be human today. It will soften my vision of life.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Here was a prospect all right but, by the description, none too promising. The use of spiritual principles in such case was not so well understood as it is now. But one of the friends said, “Put him in a private room. We’ll be down.”
Two days later, a future fellow of Alcoholics Anonymous stared glassily at the strangers beside his bed. “Who are you fellows, and why this private room? I was always in a ward before.”
Said one of the visitors, “We’re giving you a treatment for alcoholism.”
pp. 156-157
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I spent two years in graduate school 750 miles from home. I can honestly say I know why they call it geographical cure. For about nine months, I was able to cut my drinking down sharply. I still drank almost every day, but not to the point of my usual stupors, and I didn't black out very often. I was able to concentrate on my schoolwork that first year and make lots of friends. However, geographical cures are only temporary; mine lasted a little less than a year. After about ten months or so, I slowly started to slide back to the same quantities of whiskey I drank at home, and the blackouts returned. My grades started to drop, and my friends started to wonder. I even begun watching reruns again--I had brought my homemade videotapes with me to school.
pp. 322-323
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
The sponsors of those who feel they need no inventory are confronted with quite another problem. This is because people who are driven by pride of self unconsciously blind themselves to their liabilities. These newcomers scarcely need comforting. The problem is to help them discover a chink in the walls their ego has built, through which the light of reason can shine.
p. 46
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"To make mistakes is human; to stumble is commonplace; to be able to laugh at
yourself is maturity."
--William A. Ward
To remain young while growing old is the highest blessing.
--German Proverb
"Make rest a necessity, not an objective."
--Jim Rohn
"Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action."
--Benjamin Disraeli
"The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post."
--L. Thomas Holdcroft
"Once you say you are going to settle for second, that's what happens to you."
--John F. Kennedy
Friends are the sunshine of life.
--John Hay
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
WORSHIP
"Our concern is not how to
worship in the catacombs but
how to remain human in the
skyscrapers."
-- Abraham Heschel
Worship requires the discovery of "true worth" in my own life. True worship is not only
historical and traditional but also contemporary. I need to discover not only the God of
yesterday, but also the God of the modern city.
My past addiction to fantasy often made me place God in an unreal world. I was happy
talking about the Jews, Roman and Philistines but I missed God in Las Vegas, on
freeways and in local politics.
God is alive in His world, and it is tragic to make Him a prisoner of history.
Let me find You in the place where I live.
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He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed.
They were glad when it grew calm and He guided them to their desired haven.
Psalm 107:29-30
"You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, Nor of the arrow that flies by day, Nor of
the pestilence that walks in darkness, Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday."
Psalm 91:5-6
"Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new
person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do,
and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect His will really is."
Romans 12:2
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Daily Inspiration
It is hard to be upset with yourself when you are being nice to someone else. Lord, bless me with a giving spirit be I know that all I give comes back to shine on me in many different ways.
With our blessings come responsibilities. Much is required of those to whom much has been given. Lord, may I use my blessings to be a blessing to others.
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NA Just For Today
We All Belong
"Although 'politics makes strange bedfellows,' as the old saying goes, addiction makes us one of a kind."
Basic Text, p.84
What a mixture of folks we have in Narcotics Anonymous! In any given meeting on any given night, we'll find a variety of people that probably never would have sat down in a room together if it weren't for the disease of addiction.
A member who is a physician described his unwillingness to identify at his first meeting by refusing to go into "that room full of junkies." Another member with an extensive background in jails and institutions shared a similar story, except that her shock and surprise stemmed from the realization that "there were nice people there - wearing suits, yet!" These two friends recently celebrated their seventh wedding anniversary.
The most unlikely people form friendships, sponsor each other, and do service work together. We meet in the rooms of recovery together, sharing the bonds of past suffering and hope for the future. We meet on mutual ground with our focus on the two things we all have in common - addiction and recovery.
Just for today: No matter what my personal circumstances, I belong.
pg. 304
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
One will rarely err if extreme actions be ascribed to vanity, ordinary actions to habit, and mean actions to fear. --Friedrich Nietzsche
Sometimes we begin to believe someone close to us is being mean deliberately. This may happen when a good friend suddenly stops inviting us to her house. She may be scared to have others over because her parents are having problems, or for some other reason that has nothing to do with us.
But we often fear that it is because of something we said or did. We find ourselves becoming scared and pulling away. If we ask for God's help in turning our fear around, we can overcome it and ask our friend why she stopped inviting us over. Most times we will find that our friend had no idea her actions affected us the way they did. We can then laugh at ourselves for our fears and applaud ourselves for overcoming them.
What treasure might I find beneath my fear today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Thou art everywhere, but I worship you here;
Thou art without form, but I worship you in these forms;
Thou neediest no praise, yet I offer you these prayers and salutations.
--Hindu prayer
The history of the Twelve Steps tells us that in the first small A.A. group there was controversy about the word God. For some of the men, God was known in traditional religious ways; other members were agnostic. This first group followed their group conscience. The resolution they achieved has inspired many new Twelve Step members ever since. They were guided through their disagreement to a new expression of their spiritual relationship. They began to speak of a "Power greater than ourselves" and of "God, as we understood Him."
Today we turn to God as we understand God, because our definitions are restricted by human limitations. We know from our own experiences and from the stories of thousands of men and women who have preceded us, that this spiritual program is very practical and simple. It works. It restores our lives.
To a Power greater than myself, I am filled with gratitude.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
When people bother you in any way, it is because their souls are trying to get your divine attention and your blessing.
--Catherine Ponder
We are in constant communication with one another and with God in the spiritual realm. No matter how singular our particular course may appear, our path is running parallel to many paths. And all paths will intersect when the need is present. The point of intersection is the moment when another soul seeks our attention. We can be attentive and loving to the people seeking our attention. Their growth and ours is at stake,
We can be grateful for our involvement with other lives. We can be mindful that our particular blessing is like no one else's and that we all need input from the many significant persons in our lives. There is no insignificant encounter in our passage through life. Each juncture with someone else is part of the destiny of both participants.
I will look carefully and lovingly at the people around me today and bless them, one and all. They are in my life because they need to be. I, likewise, need them.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Throwing Out the Rule Book
Many of us feel like we need a rulebook, a microscope, and a warranty to get through life. We feel uncertain, frightened. We want the security of knowing what's going to happen, and how we shall act.
We don't trust life or ourselves.
We don't trust the Plan.
We want to be in control.
"I've made terrible mistakes about my choices, mistakes that nearly destroyed me. Life has really shocked me. How can I trust myself? How can I trust life, and my instincts, after where I've been?" asked one woman.
It is understandable that we fear being crushed again, considering the way many of us were when we bottomed out on our codependency. We don't have to be fearful. We can trust our self, our path, and our instincts.
Yes, we want to avoid making the same mistakes again. We are not the same people we were yesterday or last year. We've learned, grown, changed. We did what we needed to do then. If we made a mistake, we cannot let that stop us from living and fully experiencing today.
We have arrived at the understanding that we needed our experiences - even our mistakes - to get to where we are today. Do we know that we needed our life to unfold exactly as it did to find ourselves, our Higher Power, and this new way of life? Or is part of us still calling our past a mistake?
We can let go of our past and trust ourselves now. We do not have to punish ourselves with our past. We don't need a rulebook, a microscope, a warranty. All we really need is a mirror. We can look into the mirror and say, "I trust you. No matter what happens, you can take care of yourself. And what happens will continue to be good, better than you think."
Today, I will stop clinging to the painful lessons of the past. I will open myself to the positive lessons today and tomorrow hold for me. I trust that I can and will take care of myself now. I trust that the Plan is good, even when I don't know what it is.
Today I will be aware not to judge myself when I feel less than perfect. I am beginning to love myself just as I am and that feels so nice. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 18
Trust the Morning
I arrived in Sedona late at night, after ten o’clock. Motel offices were closed everywhere I went. The signs flashed “No Vacancy.” I hung around the convenience store for a while, trying to figure out what to do, having second thoughts about spontaneity and trusting the universe. I regretted not having an itinerary. I was too tired to drive much longer. I no longer cared if my journey was magical; it was back to basics. I wanted to sleep in a bed that night.
I bought the local paper and spotted an ad for a lodge. I called the number, but no luck. I got in my car, wondering what to do.
On the edge of town, I saw a motel with lights in the office and a person behind the desk. I went inside and pestered the girl behind the desk for help. She finally relented, telling me of a little known hotel about an hour away. She lived close by, she said. I could follow her there. An hour later, I gratefully checked into a room. I couldn’t find the heat, but I did have a bed, pillow, and blanket.
The next morning, I discovered I was staying on the edge of a dry, dusty golf course. The area was surrounded by low, barren hills barely covered with shrubs. I headed the car to Sedona, still tired, still wondering why I was there.
My car rounded a curve. Suddenly I was surrounded by spiraling red mesas shaped by nature into forms of bells, cathedrals, and carved towers reaching to the sky. The sunlight danced on the rusty red sculptures, lighting them with an orange-yellow glow. I smiled at the breathtaking view, grateful the experience had unfolded as it had.
Sometimes, the darkness and loneliness of night make the color and beauty of the sunrise and the new day all that much more beautiful. Contrast is an important part of creativity. Our Creator knows that. So does our heart.
Things look different in the morning. Trust that the morning will come.
*****
more language of letting go
Take another look
It's amazing the difference
A bit of sky can make.
--Shel Silverstein
We spend morning at the Blue Sky Lodge drinking coffee on the back porch watching the world wake up. One morning, after grabbing my cup, I walked out back to find Frank, a skydiving friend staying at the Lodge while visiting from the United Kingdom, busliy snapping pictures of the surrounding terrain.
"Frank, why are you taking pictures of this?" I asked. "If you want, we can take you to some of the more scenic areas around here."
"No way," he replied. "No one back home will believe that I got to spend my time in a place with a view like this."
I looked around and tried to see the view through his eyes. The rolling hills of southern California were bathed in golden early morning sunlight, while a light marine layer curled over the ridgeline of the Ortega Mountains just three miles to the west. San Jacinto rose high in the eastern sky, a pale silhouette in the morning sun.
I smiled and for the first time in a while took in the sheer beauty of the view. Lately all I had been seeing were the piles of leaves and construction materials scattered around the yard or the cars driving along the road in the valley below us. I had been surrounded with beauty and yet had grown so accustomed to it that I didn't even notice it anymore.
Many times what we need isn't a change of scenery, but a renewed vision of what's already there. Take another look at your life-- where you live, your friends, your work-- all your gifts. Maybe the view in your life is better than you think.
God, renew my spirit. Help me look at my life with a fresh vision. If I don't like what I see, help me look again.
*****
Complementary Energies
Balancing Self with Family Life by Madisyn Taylor
It is vital to the energy of your spirit and the energy of your family unit that you take time for yourself each day to balance and center.
Many of us have a hard time balancing taking care of ourselves with taking care of our family responsibilities. For people with young children, this can be especially challenging, but even people without children have obligations to care for extended family, partners, pets, and the home in which they live. It’s easy to lose track of our own needs as we give ourselves to the people, pets, and places we love. However, it is essential to their well-being that we take care of ourselves, filling our own wells with water so that we have something to offer when we return home each day.
It is easy to get caught up in the demands of home life because they never stop. There is always one more thing you can do, another dish in the sink, a counter that needs wiping, or a person who needs a ride somewhere. If you don’t set some boundaries, you will find yourself on an endless journey of housework and doing for others. Eventually, you will probably feel drained and out of touch with your inner life force. Instead of waiting for this to happen, integrate self-care into your daily schedule. Even Buddha insisted that he have one hour completely to himself every day. There are times when even that will not be possible—for example, with a new baby or a sick relative. At times like this, retreating inward energetically can be a lifesaver. You can always find five minutes to close your eyes and breathe consciously. You may even be able to meditate.
Most of the time, though, it is possible to set aside a full hour for yourself each day. In addition, scheduling a longer interval of time, perhaps on a weekly basis, can really help to restore your energy. Get a massage or go to a movie or out with a friend. Taking time to experience the world outside of your home makes returning home all the more wonderful. In the same way, taking care of yourself is a natural complement to taking care of your home and family. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Not in my wildest dreams could I have imagined the rewards that would be mine when I first contemplated turning my life and will over to the care of God as I understand Him. Now I can rejoice in the blessing of my own recovery, as well as the recoveries of countless others who have found hope and a new way of life in The Program. After all the years of waste and terror, I realize today that God has always been on my side and at my side. Isn’t my clearer understanding of God’s will one of the best things that has happened to me?
Today I Pray
May I be thankful for the blessed contrast between the way my life used to be (Part 1) and the way it is now (Part II). In Part I, I was the practicing addict, adrift among my fears and delusions. In Part II, I am the recovering addict, rediscovering my emotions, accepting my responsibilities, learning what the real world has to offer, growing close to my Higher Power. Without the contrast, I could never feel the joy I know today or sense the peaceful nearness of my Higher Power.
Today I Will Remember
I am grateful for such contrast.
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One More Day
Quote:He that can’t endure the bad, will not live to see the good.
– Yiddish Proverb
Maturity means taking thee bitter with the sweet. Wisdom is the realization that sometimes the two are interrelated. An we might have been bitter because quality of our lives was changed.
Now, with a clearer perspective and greater maturity, we realize that many of the sweeter aspects of our lives today have grown out of our learning to cope with chronic illness. We live more in the moment, rather than always pursuing some distant goal. Our values reflect a stronger sense of self; they emphasize people over things. For many of us, the growth, the joy, and the self-esteem that now sweeten our lives come from the bitter experiences of chronic illness.
I accept that my life experiences will be both good and bad. Although my illness is unwanted. I have been strengthen by it.
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Food For Thought
Relying on God
As compulsive overeaters, we relied on food to pick us up, calm us down, console us, excite us, help us, and sustain us. Since food was inadequate to do all of these things, we had to eat more and more until we became physically and emotionally addicted.
Recovery from our disease requires that dependency on food be replaced by dependency on a Higher Power. Only God, as each of us understands Him, is capable of supporting us at all times and in all situations. Food simply will not work. If we are not controlled by our Higher Power, we will be controlled by our addiction to compulsive overeating.
At first, we find it difficult to rely on a Power we cannot see. Our materialistic orientation makes us distrustful of the things that are of the spirit. Gradually, we come to believe as we witness the work of God through OA. We see evidence of His activity in our own lives, and we sense the peace and security that He gives. Reliance on God is our strength.
I depend on You for recovery.
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One Day At A Time
Looking for Love
“The most important thing in life
is to learn how to give out love,
and to let it come in.”
Morrie Schwartz
As a compulsive overeater I was always looking outside of myself for love, yet I was terrified of letting it in. “What if it hurts me once I let it in?” I was just as afraid of giving out love. “What if I lost myself or was taken advantage of?” My life was ruled by fear, and at a very young age I discovered the false security of food. I used food as a source of companionship and as a way to numb out my pain. It became a substitute for love.
As the disease gained control, the more I ate and the more shut down I became. I built huge walls around myself. As the weight came on, I was convinced that this was the reason people didn’t love me the way that I wanted to be loved. I believed that “if only I was thin enough” I would get what I wanted. It never occurred to me that I was already so full of the food that there was no room inside to receive anything else.
When I came into program and began to put down the food, I slowly discovered that this love that I was searching for was within me all along. My Higher Power is love and dwells within and all around me. In recovery I am graced with the freedom to act out of love and therefore be with my Higher Power.
One day at a time...
I will choose to act out of love and to keep my heart open to the love that my Higher Power brings into my life. If I just open my eyes, my ears and my heart, it is everywhere.
~ Jessica M.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
This world of ours has made more material progress in the last century than in all the millenniums which went before. Almost everyone knows the reason. Students of ancient history tell us that the intellect of men in those days was equal to the best of today. Yet in ancient times material progress was painfully slow. The spirit of modern scientific inquiry, research and invention was almost unknown. In the realm of the material, men's minds were fettered by superstition, tradition, and all sorts of fixed ideas. Some of the contemporaries of Columbus though a round earth preposterous. Others came near putting Galileo to death for his astronomical heresies.
We asked ourselves this: Are not some of us just as biased and unreasonable about the realm of the spirit as were the ancients about the realm of the material? - Pg. 51 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction.
Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles.
Owning My Own Anger Responsibly
Today, I am willing to take responsibility for the anger that I carry within me. I am not a bad person because I feel angry. No one wants to think of himself or herself as an angry person, and I am no exception. But when I refuse to acknowledge the anger and resentment that I have stored within me, (1) I turn my back on me and refuse to accept a very important part of myself, and (2) I ask the people close to me to hold my feelings for me, to be the containers of my unconscious or the feelings inside me that I do not wish to see. Because I deny my anger to myself does not mean that it goes away. Today, I am willing to consider that there might be something more to it, that I may be carrying feelings of anger that I need to accept.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Want to know about your Spiritual Source? 'It is a simple procedure to calculate the number of seeds in an apple. But who among us can ever say how many apples are in a seed?' ~Dr. Wayne Dyer, Everyday Wisdom
Even though I feel very small when the stars come out at night, I remember that I, too, am made of stardust.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Don't believe in miracles. Rely on them.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am full of joy in the discovery that I am okay just the way I am. Today I can accept all of me today and that is a miracle.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I don't have to figure out God's will for me anymore. God's will is defined for me by taking Steps 10 and 11. Because it's all a process of weeding out everything which isn't God's will. - Cindy F.
bluidkiti
10-10-2021, 12:07 PM
October 19
Daily Reflections
A. A.'S "MAIN TAPROOT"
The principle that we shall find no enduring strength until we first admit complete defeat
is the main taproot from which our whole Society has sprung and flowered.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 21-22
Defeated, and knowing it, I arrived at the doors of A.A., alone and afraid of the unknown.
A power outside of myself had picked me up off my bed, guided me to the phone book,
then to the bus stop, and through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous. Once inside A.A. I
experienced a sense of being loved and accepted, something I had not felt since early
childhood. May I never lose the sense of wonder I experienced on that first evening with
A.A., the greatest event of my entire life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Do I realize that I do not know how much time I have left? It may be later than I think.
Am I going to do the things that I know I should do before my time runs out? By the way,
what is my purpose for the rest of my life? Do I realize all I have to make up for in my
past wasted life? Do I know that I am living on borrowed time and that I would not have
even this much time left without A.A. and the grace of God? Am I going to make what
time I have left count for A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
We can believe that somehow the cry of the human soul is never unheard by God. It may
be that God hears the cry, even if we fail to notice God's response to it. The human cry
for help must always evoke a response of some sort from God. It may be that our failure
to discern properly keeps us unaware of the response. But one thing we can believe is
that the grace of God is always available for every human being who sincerely calls for
help. Many changed lives are living proofs of this fact.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may trust God to answer my prayer as He sees fit. I pray that I may be
content with whatever form that answer may take.
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As Bill Sees It
TIME VERSUS MONEY, p. 290
Our attitude toward the giving of time when compared with our
attitude toward giving money presents an interesting contrast. We
give a lot of our time to A.A. activities for our own protection and
growth, but also for the sake of our groups, our areas, A.A. as a
whole, and, above all, the newcomer. Translated into terms of money,
these collective sacrifices would add up to a huge sum.
But when it comes to the actual spending of cash, particularly for
A.A. service overhead, many of us are apt to turn a bit reluctant. We
think of the loss of all that earning power in our drinking years, of
those sums we might have laid by for emergencies or for education
of the kids.
In recent years, this attitude is everywhere on the decline; it
quickly disappears when the real need for a given A.A. service
becomes clear. Donors can seldom see what the exact result has
been. They well know, however, that countless thousands of other
alcoholics and their families are being helped.
TWELVE CONCEPTS, pp. 63-64
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Walk In Dry Places
The same situation... over and over
Growth in Maturity.
Our drinking experience should have taught us that we'll continue to repeat old destructive behaviors until we change our attitudes.
In sobriety, we can take this idea a step further and apply it to other areas. If we have trouble with other people, for example, we should ask what we're doing to bring about unpleasant situations.
This is not to say that we're responsible for everything that goes wrong, but we are getting a message ourselves if we continuously meet the same problem in different forms. Some people, for example, repeatedly become involved in bad relationships or find themselves working for abusive bosses.
Just as a changed attitude helped us recover from our drinking problem, so can a new attitude keep us from repeating other destructive situations.
I'll be on the lookout today for any indications of a tendency to "attract" trouble. It's true that I can have bad luck, but I don't need to bring it on myself.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
A wise man changes his mind, a fool never will.---Seventeenth century proverb
We addicts used to be stubborn. Once we got an idea in our heads, we wouldn’t change it.
We didn’t listen to others ideas. We almost seemed to say, “Don’t tell me the facts. I’ve already made up my mind.”
But lately , some new ideas are making sense to us. We are starting to change our minds. Maybe we are good people, after all. Maybe we do deserve to be happy. Maybe other people can help us. Maybe our Higher Power does know best.
We’re not acting like fools any longer. We’re learning to change our old ideas.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, when I hear a better idea, help me change my mind.
Action for the Day: When I hear or read a new idea today, I’ll really think about it. If it fits, I’ll try it.
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Each Day a New Beginning
One of the conclusions I have come to in my old age is the importance of living in the ever-present now. In the past, too often I indulged in the belief that somehow or other tomorrow would be brighter or happier or richer. --Ruth Casey
How easily our minds jump from the present to the foibles of the past or our fears about the future. How seldom are our minds on this moment, and only this moment.
Before we picked up this book, where were our thoughts? We need to practice, with diligence, returning our minds to whatever the experience at hand. A truly creative response to any situation can only be made when we are giving it our undivided attention. And each creative response initiates an even more exciting follow-up experience.
All we have of life, all that it can offer us is here, now. If we close our mind to the present, this present, we'll only continue to do so when the tomorrow we dream of now becomes the present. There are no tomorrows.
I will let go of the past and the future. My only reality is here, now. God's gifts are here, today, right now.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Hopelessness was written large on the man’s face as he replied, “Oh, but that’s no use. Nothing would fix me. I’m a goner. The last three times, I got drunk on the way home from here. I’m afraid to go out the door. I can’t understand it.”
For an hour, the two friends told him about their drinking experiences. Over and over, he would say: “That’s me. That’s me. I drink like that.”
p. 157
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
Fortunately, I managed to graduate, but I had gone nowhere. After graduation, I returned to my parents' house, as I had been unsuccessful in securing a job. I was back. I was back in my old bedroom, back to the same routine of drinking every evening until I passed out, and it was getting worse. I was starting earlier and earlier and consuming more and more liquor. I had no job, no friends; I saw no one but my parents.
p. 323
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
First off, they can be told that the majority of A.A. members have suffered severely from self-justification during their drinking days. For most of us, self-justification was the maker of excuses; excuses, of course, for drinking, and for all kinds of crazy and damaging conduct. We had made the invention of alibis a fine art. We had to drink because times were hard or times were good. We had to drink because at home we were smothered with love or got none at all. We had to drink because at work we were great successes or dismal failures. We had to drink because our nation had won a war or lost a peace. And so it went, ad infinitum.
pp. 46-47
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I am never alone
never abandoned
never deserted
never judged
never chastised
and never without Gods aid.
--Shelley
"As a deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for you, O God.
My soul thirsts for God."
Those who are lifting the world upward and onward are those who encourage more than criticize.
--Elizabeth Harrison
Correction does much, but encouragement does more.
--Goethe
Words to live by are just words, unless you live by them. You have to walk the talk.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs.
--Cited in More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to
leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
--unknown
We are never so lost that God can't find us.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
TACT
"Tact is the art of making a
point without making an
enemy."
-- Howard W. Newton
An aspect of my recovery is not hurting people's feelings unnecessarily. I am learning
how to say what I have to say without causing offense. Today I am learning to be tactful
and respectful.
As a drunk I would say the first thing that came into my head without any regard for
the feelings of others. I was often violent with words, sarcastic with comments and
cruel in dialogue. Tact was a sign of weakness; gentleness and sensitivity were
unmanly; my power was seen in forcing people to change their minds!
Today I do not wish to be like this. Today I desire to be tactful.
Lord, let me always express my opinion respectfully.
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For great is Your love higher than the heavens; Your faithfulness reaches to the skies.
Psalm 108:4
You are my refuge and my shield; your word is my only source of hope. Get out of my
life, you evil-minded people, for I intend to obey the commands of my God. LORD,
sustain me as you promised, that I may live! Do not let my hope be crushed. Sustain me,
and I will be saved; then I will meditate on your principles continually.
Psalm 119:114-117
Let not kindness and truth forsake thee: Bind them about thy neck; Write them upon the
tablet of thy heart.
Proverbs 3:3
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Daily Inspiration
Complaining reinforces your own unhappiness. Lord, when I speak, help to say things that are worth listening to and reinforce a joyful spirit.
Life is what our thinking makes it. Lord, help me visualize myself richly living each day, believing, achieving, and then succeeding.
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NA Just For Today
Standing For Something
"... we could feel time, touch reality, and recognize spiritual values long lost to many of us."
Basic Text, p.85
In our active addiction, we were prepared to compromise everything we believed in just to get our hands on more drugs. Whether we stole from our families and friends, sold ourselves, or lied to our employers, we were ignoring the values that mattered most to us. Each time we compromised another dearly held belief, another chunk of the mortar holding our characters together fell away. By the time many of us came to our first meeting, nothing was left but the ruin of our former selves.
We will locate our lost values as we carry out our first honest self-examination. But in order to rebuild our characters, we'll find it necessary to maintain those values, no matter how great the temptation to shove them aside. We will need to be honest, even when we think we could fool everyone by lying. If we ignore our values, we'll discover that the biggest fibs we've told have been the ones we've told ourselves.
We don't want to start the demolition of our spirits again after all the work we've put into their restoration. It's essential that we stand for something, or we risk falling for anything. Whatever we find important to us, we honor.
Just for today: I stand for something. My strength is the result of living my values.
pg. 305
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
All power is a trust. We are accountable for its exercise. From people and for people all power springs, and all must exist. --Benjamin Disraeli
The sun is power. It warms, it burns, it feeds the plants without which we could not live. Yet, for all its power, the sun cannot make so much as a rainbow by itself. For that, it needs the rain, at just the right time and angle.
No matter how strong we are--or smart or talented or attractive--we realize our full power only by filtering it through others. Our most meaningful achievements are born of combined efforts. Even when we do something that feels like ours alone--paint a painting, win an award, hit a home run--there is always a constellation of friends and family and teachers, even enemies, who've been a part of our success.
Like the rain's part in the rainbow, the contributions of others do not detract from our achievements, but enhance them and bring them to their fullest light.
How are others enhancing my growth today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If only I could throw away the urge to trace my patterns in your heart I could really see you. --David Brandon
Trying to control and change the people around us creates great problems in our relationships. When people we love are expressing themselves, we're thinking about what we wish they would say, and it blocks us from hearing clearly. A need for safety and for a guarantee that we won't be abandoned urges us to manipulate the people we love. We know we have innocent motives. We say we only want what is best and that we are only trying to protect ourselves or be helpful. But we hide from the effects our actions have on our relationships.
We seem to be more trapped in these self-centered behaviors with the ones we are closest to. We can change ourselves by slowly releasing our security grip on others. We can focus more on understanding what others are saying to us than on changing how they think and feel. Intimacy is clearly seeing each other and knowing the differences as well as the similarities. It requires that both people be allowed to walk on separate paths.
I will release my grip on my loved ones and turn to my Higher Power for security and serenity.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
One of the conclusions I have come to in my old age is the importance of living in the ever-present now. In the past, too often I indulged in the belief that somehow or other tomorrow would be brighter or happier or richer. --Ruth Casey
How easily our minds jump from the present to the foibles of the past or our fears about the future. How seldom are our minds on this moment, and only this moment.
Before we picked up this book, where were our thoughts? We need to practice, with diligence, returning our minds to whatever the experience at hand. A truly creative response to any situation can only be made when we are giving it our undivided attention. And each creative response initiates an even more exciting follow-up experience.
All we have of life, all that it can offer us is here, now. If we close our mind to the present, this present, we'll only continue to do so when the tomorrow we dream of now becomes the present. There are no tomorrows.
I will let go of the past and the future. My only reality is here, now. God's gifts are here, today, right now.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Our Good Points
What's a codependent? The answer's easy. They're some of the most loving, caring people I know. --Beyond Codependency
We don't need to limit an inventory of ourselves to the negatives. Focusing only on what's wrong is a core issue in our codependency.
Honestly, fearlessly, ask: "What's right with me? What are my good points?"
"Am I a loving, caring, nurturing person?" We may have neglected to love ourselves in the process of caring for others, but nurturing is an asset.
"Is there something I do particularly well?" "Do I have a strong faith?" "Am I good at being there for others?" "Am I good as part of a team, or as a leader?" "Do I have a way with words or with emotions?"
"Do I have a sense of humor?" "Do I brighten people up?" "Am I good at comforting others?" "Do I have an ability to make something good out of barely nothing at all?" "Do I see the best in people?"
These are character assets. We may have gone to an extreme with these, but that's okay. We are now on our way to finding balance.
Recovery is not about eliminating our personality. Recovery aims at changing, accepting, working around, or transforming our negatives, and building on our positives. We all have assets; we only need to focus on them, empower them, and draw them out in ourselves.
Codependents are some of the most loving, caring people around. Now, we're learning to give some of that concern and nurturing to ourselves.
Today, I will focus on what's right about me. I will give myself some of the caring I've extended to the world.
I am so grateful I have a power greater than myself to turn to when I do not have the answers. I am so grateful for the program of recovery that has brought me joy and purpose and love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 19
Honor This Time of Change
I left Point Reyes, a seashore town close to San Francisco, heading for Sequoia National Park. I wanted to cross the Golden Gate Bridge, but I wasn’t certain I could find it. City traffic was jarring after being in the woods, the mountains, and by the sea. Before long, however, I found myself at the foot of the Golden Gate. As I drove the span of the bridge, I felt the same electric charge surge through me as I had felt in Chimayo, in Ojo Caliente, and on the Flathead Reservation. It was the first time I realized that bridges are holy, sacred ground.
Times of change are holy. We may not know where we’re going. It may not feel like our feet are on solid ground. They aren’t. We’re crossing a bridge to another part of our lives.
Sometimes we may find ourselves at this bridge unwittingly, not certain how we got there, not certain we want to cross. Other times, we may have sought, prayed for, hoped for, longed for this time of change.
Drive across the bridge. You don’t have to understand it all right now. Information and understanding will come later. You’ll get to the other side. For now, trust and experience what you’re going through. Know that this time of change is sacred,too.
*****
more language of letting go
See for yourself
I have a friend who likes to hike and backpack. He always takes beautiful pictures of the places that he visits. After one trip he was telling me about a camp high in the California Sierras while showing me a photo of a stunning sunset. He told me about the night that he returned to camp after walking to the top of the mountain.
"When I got down, I found that everyone else had packed up and left camp. I was alone at twelve thousand feet. The silence was so thick I could almost touch it. You should have seen the sunset that night. It was even better than this picture."
"Why didn't you take a picture if the sunset was even more beautiful?" I asked.
"I figured that no one else cared to see the world from that viewpoint that night but me, so I just kept the sunset all to myself," he explained. "If you weren't there, you just missed out."
This summer I watched the sun set over a lake in a corner of New Mexico, then I spent the night under the stars in a sleeping bag. The stars were so clear, so close, so brilliant I felt like I could touch them. And no, I didn't take a picture. If you weren't there, you just missed out.
You can read a meditation book, make a list, and even talk to people who live their lives fully, but unless you make the trip yourself, you won't see all this life has to offer.
Is there a picture that you've been to busy to see lately? Break out of the ordinary. See something new or see the ordinary in a new way. Don't just glance. Really look. Then bring back the picture in your heart. Unless you're there, you're just missing out. Some things you just need to see for yourself.
God, help me live my life to the fullest. Help me see and treasure all the beauty in the world.
*****
Appreciating Suggestions
Other People's Agendas
As children, our parents had dreams for us. They wanted us to do well in school, and to do whatever was necessary to reach our highest potential. Later in life, friends may try to set us up with their idea of the perfect partner or the perfect job. Spouses may have agendas for us, too. People close to us may have ideas about how we should live our lives, ideas that usually come from love and the desire for us to be happy. Other times, they come from a place of need within them—whether it is the parent who wants us to live out his or her dreams or the friend or spouse who wants us to play an already-defined role. Whatever the case, we can appreciate and consider those people’s input, but ultimately we must follow our own inner guidance.
There may come a time when all the suggestions can become overbearing. We may feel that the people we love don’t approve of our judgment, which can hurt our feelings. It can interfere with the choices we make for our lives by making us doubt ourselves, or filling a void with their wishes before we’ve had a chance to decide what we want. It can affect us energetically as well. We may have to deal with feelings of resistance or the need to shut ourselves off from them. But we can take some time to rid ourselves of any unnecessary doubts and go within to become clear on what we desire for ourselves.
We can tell our loved ones how much we appreciate their thoughts and ideas, but that we need to live our own lives and make our own decisions. We can explain that they need to let us learn from our own experiences rather than rob us of wonderful life lessons and the opportunity to fine-tune our own judgment. When they see that we are happy with our lives and the path we are taking to reach our goals, they can rest assured that all we need them to do is to share in our joy. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
There are countless ways by which my progress and growth in The Program can be measured. One of the most important is my awareness that I’m no longer compelled, almost obsessively, to go around judging everything and everybody. My only business today is to work on changing myself, rather than other people, places and things. In its own way, the obsession of being forever judgmental was as burdensome to me as the obsession of my addiction; I’m grateful that both weights have been lifted from my shoulders. When I become judgmental, will I remind myself that I’m trespassing on God’s territory?
Today I Pray
Forgive me my trespasses, when I have become the self-proclaimed judge-and-jury of my peers. By being judgmental, I have trespassed on the rights of others to judge themselves– and on the rights of God in the Highest Court of all. May I throw away all my judgmental tools — my own yardstick and measuring tapes, my own comparisons, my unreachable standards — and accept each person as an individual beyond compare.
Today I Will Remember
Throw away old tapes – especially measuring tapes.
************************************
One More Day
There must be something strangely sacred in salt. It is in our tears and in the sea.
– Kahlil Gibran
Emotion plays around a person’s face, making it strained or relaxed. We say we can “read” someone else’s face. Few of us burst into spontaneous tears or laughter, but instead first show slight emotion on our faces or in the way we speak.
Laughter is instrumental to our well-being, but tears are also essential to our emotional survival. When we finally release the emotions we feel and the dams break loose, the tears are healing. They allow us to cleanse ourselves of pent-up angers, fears, and frustrations.
I know crying is a human characteristic. I will not be ashamed of my need to cry, for tears are part of my human experience.
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Food For Thought
To Abstain Is to Live
If we do not abstain from compulsive overeating, we do not live - we merely survive. Without abstinence, joy and creativity fade and we are left with only the effort of getting from one day to the next. We remember the despair of living without the OA program, and we are grateful that we have been given a reprieve from our former misery.
Abstaining is what we do each day in order to live the life our Higher Power intends us to have. There are good days and bad days and mediocre days. As long as we abstain from compulsive overeating, we are able to accept our passing moods and the events of each day with inner serenity. We make progress in our activities and in our understanding. We are alive to the possibilities of each moment.
To abstain requires that we choose a long-term satisfaction rather than a short-lived indulgence. To abstain is to walk with our Higher Power in the way He shows us.
Thank You for the power to abstain.
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One Day At A Time
Live and Let Live
“If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.”
Henry David Thoreau
I have gleaned from the OA program that I can let others be themselves and make their own decisions unless an issue involves me as well. What a powerful concept. I have struggled long and hard with the issue of letting others live their lives as they choose without the benefit of my wise, profound advice. I really believed that I had all the answers and that by listening to me, one could get his or her life on the right track and be forever grateful to me for the magnanimous favor I had done them. I really believed this! I was also deeply frustrated when people did not immediately do whatever it was I had “advised” them to do. How could they be so dumb?
More importantly, how did I overlook the fact that my own life was heading downhill at a remarkable clip? Thanks to the OA program, I have slowly learned to keep my mouth shut. My motto for relationships is simple: sweep off my side of the street. It makes being me so much easier and it makes the lives of those around me a bit better too.
One day at a time...
Today I will accept and love those around me without acting on the urge to make their lives “better.” I will live and let live as I continue to realize the freedom the program offers me.
~ Pete
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
This is not to say that all alcoholics are honest and upright when not drinking. Of course that isn't so, and such people often may impose on you. Seeing your attempt to understand and help, some men will try to take advantage of your kindness. - Pg. 141 - To Employers
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now there probably isn't much time that goes by when you don't think about using. Although sometimes frightening, understand that slowly this will fade away. Only time will remove your constant thoughts of using or drinking, but it does pass.
Every time I think getting high would feel good, let me remember the pain in my gut and fear in my heart just not so long ago.
Responsibility
Today, I see that I can't release something just because someone tells me that it is the right or nice thing to do. Until I have moved through an internal process of identifying honestly what is going on with me, I can't really let it go. Honesty means that I am willing to be responsible. Whatever negative characteristics may have become a part of me from living with unhealed pain are, unfortunately, mine to deal with now. Projecting and blaming will not get me closer to getting rid of them. If I do not own my feelings, they will own me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
In order to forgive, you have to have blamed.
I don't have to forgive people, places, and things, if I don't blame people, places, and things.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The process is perfect; let it work.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am so grateful I have a power greater than myself to turn to when I do not have the answers. I am so grateful for the program of recovery that has brought me joy and purpose and love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I play the ball from where it lies - not where I wish it was. - Arnold Palmer.
bluidkiti
10-10-2021, 12:10 PM
October 20
Daily Reflections
SOLACE FOR CONFUSION
Obviously, the dilemma of the wanderer from faith is that of profound confusion. He
thinks himself lost to the comfort of any conviction at all. He cannot attain in even a small
degree the assurance of the believer, the agnostic, or the atheist. He is the bewildered
one.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 28
The concept of God was one that I struggled with during my early years of sobriety. The
images that came to me, conjured from my past, were heavy with fear, rejection and
condemnation. Then I heard my friend Ed's image of a Higher Power: As a boy he had
been allowed a litter of puppies, provided that he assume responsibility for their care.
Each morning he would find the unavoidable "byproducts" of the puppies on the kitchen
floor. Despite frustration, Ed said he couldn't get angry because "that's the nature of
puppies." Ed felt that God viewed our defects and shortcomings with a similar
understanding and warmth. I've often found solace from my personal confusion in Ed's
calming concept of God.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
For the past few weeks we have been asking ourselves some searching questions. We
have not been able to answer them all as we would like. But on the right answers to these
questions will depend the usefulness and effectiveness of our lives and to some extent the
usefulness and effectiveness of the whole A.A. movement. It all boils down to this: I
owe a deep debt to A.A. and to the grace of God. Am I going to do all I can to repay this
debt? Let us search our souls, make our own decisions, and act accordingly. Any real
success we have in life will depend on that. Now is the time to put our conclusions into
effect. What am I going to do about it?
Meditation For The Day
"Our Lord and our God, be it done unto us according to Thy will." Simple acceptance of
God's will in whatever happens is the key to abundant living. We must continue to pray:
Not my will but Thy will be done. It may not turn out the way you want it to, but it will be
the best way in the long run, because it is God's way. If you decide to accept whatever
happens as God's will for yourself, whatever it may be, your burdens will be lighter. Try
to see in all things some fulfillment of the Divine Intent.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may see the working out of God's will in my life. I pray that I may be content
with whatever He will for me.
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As Bill Sees It
Pain-Killer----or Pain-Healer, p. 291
"I believe that when we were active alcoholics we drank mostly to
kill pain of one kind or another--physical or emotional or psychic.
Of course, everybody has a cracking point, and I suppose you
reached yours--hence, the resort once more to the bottle.
"If I were you, I wouldn't heap devastating blame on myself for
this; on the other hand, the experience should redouble your
conviction that alcohol has no permanent value as a pain-killer."
*********************************
In every A.A. story, pain has been the price of admission into a
new life. But this admission price purchased more than we
expected. It led us to a measure of humility, which we soon discovered
to be a healer of pain. We began to fear pain less, and desire humility
more than ever.
1. LETTER, 1959
2. TWELVE AND TWELVE, p. 75
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Walk In Dry Places
This too shall pass
Acceptance
When personal problems are brought up in group discussions, someone usually remembers the saying, "This too shall pass." We use it in reference to unpleasant matters, but it also applies to happier experiences. It is a certainty that nothing will ever stay the same.
Our responsibility to ourselves is to see all situations constructively, whether they are seen as good or bad at the time. WHat seems a disappoint today might be seen as a blessing tomorrow. And we can't always be sure that today's wonderful opportunity doesn't have a few hidden nettles in it.
The one certainty is that everything will pass. We should extract the good from everything, and let what is unpleasant fade into the past.
Whatever I'm facing today will certainly change as I do my best in the 24 hours ahead. None of us is permanently bound to any problem.
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Keep It Simple
We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves.---Eric Hoffer
When we’re not honest with others, we’re not being honest with ourselves. In recovery, we’re taught how to heal our hearts. We admit we’re wrong, and we do it quickly. We let our spirit have the loudest voice. This way, lies lose power over us. We find a way to be true to our spirit.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You have a soft, quiet voice inside me. Help me, through meditation, to hear You better. Yours is the voice to follow.
Action for the Day: I’ll listen to my Higher Power. I’ll list any lies I’ve been telling myself and others lately. Then I’ll find someone I trust and tell that person what I’ve lied about.
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Each Day a New Beginning
...You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now. --Joan Baez
How thrilling to contemplate that we can choose every attitude we have and every action we take. We have been gifted with full responsibility for our development. What will we try today? It's our personal choice. How will we decide on a particular issue? Our options are only limited by our vision.
Every situation in life offers us a significant opportunity for making a decision that will, of necessity, influence the remaining situations we encounter. Just as we are interdependent, needing and influencing one another in all instances that bring us together, likewise our decisions are never inviolate. Each is singly important; however, its impact is multiplied by the variety of other decisions triggered.
The choice is ours for livings fully today, for taking advantage of all the opportunities that present themselves. Our personal growths, our emotional and spiritual development, are in our hands. God will provide us with the guidance, and the program offers us the tools. The decision to act is ours, alone.
I will exercise my personal power. My choices determine my development.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
The man in the bed was told of the acute poisoning from which he suffered, how it deteriorates the body of an alcoholic and warps his mind. There was much talk about the mental state preceding the first drink.
“Yes, that’s me,” said the sick man, “the very image. You fellows know your stuff all right, but I don’t see what good it’ll do. You fellows are somebody. I was once, but I’m a nobody now. From what you tell me, I know more than ever I can’t stop.” At this both the visitors burst into a laugh. Said the future Fellow Anonymous: “Damn little to laugh about that I can see.”
p. 157
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I was beyond frustration at this point. Hadn't I done everything that was expected of me? Hadn't I graduated from college and gone on to earn a master's degree? I had never gone to jail, crashed any cars, or got into trouble like a real alcoholic would. When I was working, I never missed a day because of drinking. I never ran myself into debt, nor had I abused a spouse or children. Sure I drank a lot, but I didn't have a problem; how could I when I hadn't done any of the things that prove you're an alcoholic? So what was the problem? All I wanted was a decent job so I could be independent and productive. I could not understand why life just wouldn't cut me a break.
p. 323
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
We thought "conditions" drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn't to our entire satisfaction, our drinking went out of hand and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were.
p. 47
************************************************** *********
Faith that the thing can be done is essential to any great achievement.
--Thomas N. Carter
Knowing Gods gift of inner strength and courage, I move forward with the things that
once terrified me.
--Shelly
You could have everything in life and still have nothing or you could seek the Truth.
--unknown
The surface holds only illusions. Search deeper for the truth.
--unknown
Communication is the key to unlocking many doors in life.
--unknown
Change is hard, explaining why it is easier to stay in a negative frame of mind rather than
a positive one.
--unknown
God is there when we need him the most. When we are afflicted, when trials are facing us,
he is there for us. But what we need to understand is that God is there for us even when
there are no trials, or when we are not afflicted. In knowing this truth, we can appeal to
God at any time. We need not look to God only in testing times, but in fertile times. We
should look to cultivate a relationship with Him in good times, and not just bad.
--unknown
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
OBSERVANCE
"The older I grow, the more I
listen to people who don't say
much."
-- German G. Gladden
I've noticed that an important part of my recovery is people watching. I have fun watching
people --- at a party, on a train or in a park. I find the daily "theater" of life fascinating
and stimulating. I also learn so much about me by observing others. I can identify with
their mannerisms, actions and facial antics and intuitively sense what they are feeling. I
see their fear, hesitancy and shame and connect it with mine. People are a mirror to
my life.
Part of my recovery is developing that instinctive spirituality that grows through
observation. The human being is forever communicating, sending energy and messages
not only with words but by his existence --- and especially by his silence. Sometimes a
person's silence can be deafening! God is most alive to me in the lives and behavior of
His people, and part of my worship and prayer is observing the splendor and richness of
my fellow human beings.
You, who have created the universe in such magnificent silence, touch me with Your
stillness.
************************************************** *********
"Do not be afraid, little flock, for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the
kingdom."
Luke 12:32
"We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed."
2 Corinthians 4:8-9
"No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but
only the Father."
Matthew 24:36
"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to
everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with
gentleness and respect."
1 Peter 3:15
"This, then, is how you should pray: "‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily
bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into
temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.' For if you forgive men when they sin against
you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins,
your Father will not forgive your sins.
Matthew 6:9-15
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
When we are in a bad mood we are often reactive and irrational. A few moments of gratitude for all that we have will quickly change our feelings. Lord, help me gratefully remember that there is always more good in my life than bad.
Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Freedom To Choose
"Enforced morality lacks the power that comes to us when we choose to live a spiritual life."
Basic Text, p.44
In our active addiction, many of us lived our lives by default. We were unwilling or unable to make choices about how we wanted to act, what we preferred to do, or even where we would live. We allowed the drugs or other people to make our most basic decisions for us. Freedom from active addiction means, among other things, the freedom to make those choices for ourselves.
Freedom of choice is a wonderful gift, but it's also a great responsibility. Choice allows us to find out who we are and what we believe in. However, in exercising it, we're called on to weigh our own choices and accept the consequences. This leads some of us to seek out someone who will make our choices for us-our sponsor, our home group, our NA friends-just as our disease made our choices for us when we were using. That's not recovery.
Seeking others' experience is one thing; abdicating personal responsibility is something else. If we don't use the gift of freedom we've been given, if we refuse to accept the responsibilities that go along with it, we'll lose that gift and our lives will be diminished. We are responsible for our own recovery and our own choices. Difficult as it may seem; we must make those choices for ourselves and become willing to accept the consequences.
Just for today: I am grateful for the freedom to live as I choose. Today, I will accept responsibility for my recovery, make my own choices, and accept the consequences.
pg. 306
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The bough, which has been downward thrust by force of strength to bend its top to earth, so soon as the pressing hand is gone, looks up again straight to the sky above. --Boethius
When we are down, low, depressed, why can't we ignore the desire to rise up again? Because we're like plants that need pure air, water, and sun. Because no matter how bent and old, we just keep wanting to grow up. Because there is a natural spring in us like that which makes flowers leap from the earth in May. Because we have hidden wings. And if we listen, we can feel the difference between wrong and right: we know the difference even with our eyes closed. Therefore we should not try putting ourselves down, for we will spring up again, sure as Spring.
What is the main way I try to put myself down?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Life is not a spectacle or a feast; it is a predicament. --George Santayana
We could probably feel more tranquil if the world were a simpler place and always gave us simple answers. But we are faced with many ambiguous and uncertain situations. The changing roles of men and women can often leave us bewildered. We are engaged in the development of relationships that have lives of their own, and it's not always clear where they are headed. Even within ourselves we have contradictory feelings, and it's difficult to come up with clear answers.
Since we cannot force simplicity upon the world, we must turn to ourselves for a new response. We can become more tolerant of our unsettled predicaments. We can learn to have faith that good comes from change. Things have a way of settling out and clarifying with time. As we develop patience with the questions and the unclear issues in our lives, we gain a deeper serenity.
Today, I will recall the predicaments in my past life that, in time, became clearer, and I will have patience with what seems unsettled.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now. --Joan Baez
How thrilling to contemplate that we can choose every attitude we have and every action we take. We have been gifted with full responsibility for our development. What will we try today? It's our personal choice. How will we decide on a particular issue? Our options are only limited by our vision.
Every situation in life offers us a significant opportunity for making a decision that will, of necessity, influence the remaining situations we encounter. Just as we are interdependent, needing and influencing one another in all instances that bring us together, likewise our decisions are never inviolate. Each is singly important; however, its impact is multiplied by the variety of other decisions triggered.
The choice is ours for livings fully today, for taking advantage of all the opportunities that present themselves. Our personal growths, our emotional and spiritual development, are in our hands. God will provide us with the guidance, and the program offers us the tools. The decision to act is ours, alone.
I will exercise my personal power. My choices determine my development.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Detaching with Love
Sometimes people we love do things we don't like or approve of. We react. They react. Before long, we're all reacting to each other, and the problem escalates.
When do we detach? When we're hooked into a reaction of anger, fear, guilt, or shame. When we get hooked into a power play - an attempt to control or force others to do something they don't want to do. When the way we're reacting isn't helping the other person or solving the problem. When the way we're reacting is hurting us.
Often, it's time to detach when detachment appears to be the least likely, or possible, thing to do.
The first step toward detachment is understanding that reacting and controlling don't help. The next step is getting peaceful - getting centered and restoring our balance.
Take a walk. Leave the room. Go to a meeting. Take a long, hot bath. Call a friend. Call on God. Breathe deeply. Find peace. From that place of peace and centering will emerge an answer, a solution.
Today, I will surrender and trust that the answer is near.
It feels so good to know that I am healing from my old wounds. As I bring love and acceptance to myself today I can watch the pain disappear and I feel so much better about myself. --Ruth Fishel
************************************
Journey To The Heart
October 20
Fall into the Arms of Universal Love
Often in our lives we stand on a precipice. Something happens, a situation occurs, and in one moment our life changes dramatically in a way we hoped and prayed it wouldn’t. We topple off. In that moment, we may feel as if we’ve been pushed off a cliff.
Other times when we stand poised and our life changes radically in one moment, it’s a welcome change. We feel delightfully spontaneous, guided, powerful, centered. Ready to take risks. Ready to leap into the adventure.
Sometimes we’re pushed, sometimes we decide to make the leap on our own. Either way, we’re safe, we’re protected. Either way we can trust that we’ll land in the arms of universal love.
*****
more language of letting go
Be present now
Take time, but not too much, to see where you want to go. Learn the lessons from your past. Then let go of yesterday. Let tomorrow take care of itself. Even our best prediction about what may come in the future is only an educated guess, no matter how diligently we try to see ahead. If all you look at is where you're going, you'll miss all the wonder and beauty along the way. And once you get there-- your future-- you may not even remember where you've been. Rushing may be such a habit that you won't enjoy your future once it arrives.
Be where you are right now. See what's in front of you, not what you wish were there. Take time to see, enjoy, and appreciate what's present. Take action if you need to. Or just enjoy the view. You've worked hard to get here. Enjoy it.
The past is important. It's where we've been. The future is important,too. But there's no time-- and no time as real-- as the present.
Learn to be here,now.
God heighten my awareness and appreciation of each moment in my life.
*****
Argument
Stepping Back from Anger by Madisyn Taylor
The emotional trigger than begins an argument may have little to do with your present situation, but has dug up a wound.
When we find ourselves in an argument, we may feel like we are losing control of emotions that have taken on lives of their own. When we can become aware that this is happening, taking a deep breath can help us step back from the situation. Once we can separate ourselves from the heat of the moment, we may find that the emotional trigger that began the argument has little to do with the present situation, but may have brought up feelings related to something else entirely. Looking honestly at what caused our reaction allows us to consciously respond more appropriately to the situation and make the best choices.
We can make an agreement with our partners and those closest to us that asking questions can help all of us discover the source of the argument. The shared awareness can result in finding simple solutions to something physical, like low blood sugar or even a hormonal surge. Maybe we are taking ourselves too seriously, and we can just laugh and watch the tension dissolve. We could also discover that perhaps we are addicted to the excitement that drama brings and the chemicals that our body creates when we are angry. But there may be a deeper issue that requires discussion, understanding, and patience. The more we allow ourselves to step back and examine our reasons for arguing, the easier it becomes to allow real feelings to surface and guide us toward solutions that improve our lives.
When we can be clear about our feelings and intentions and communicate them clearly, we have a far better chance of getting what we want than if we lose control or allow our subconscious minds to manipulate the situation. We might take our frustrations out on the people closest to us because we feel safe and comfortable with them, but misplaced anger can cause more harm than good. Arguing for what we truly believe can empower us and help us to direct our passions toward greater life experiences. Truly knowing our reasons for arguing enables us to grow emotionally in ways that will affect our whole being. Published with permission from Daily OM
************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Before I admitted my powerlessness over alcohol and other chemicals, I had as much self-worth as a “peeled zero.” I came into The Program as a nobody who desperately wanted to be a somebody. In retrospect, my self-esteem was shredded, seemingly beyond repair. Gradually, The Program has enabled me to achieve an even-stronger sense of self-worth. I’ve come to accept myself, realizing that I’m not so bad as I had always supposed myself to be. Am I learning that my self-worth is not dependent on the approval of others, but instead is truly an “inside job”?
Today I Pray
When I am feeling down and worthless, may my Higher Power and my friends in the group help me see that, although I was “fallen,” I was not “cast down.” However sick I might have been in my worst days, with all the self-esteem of an earth worm, may I know that I still had the power of choice. And I chose to do something about myself. May that good choice be the basis for my reactivated self-worth.
Today I Will Remember
I will not kick myself when I’m down.
************************************
One More Day
By a tranquil mind I mean nothing else than a mind well ordered.
– Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
When we are diagnosed as having a permanent medical condition, we may think we’ll never know tranquility again. Before too long, though, we realize that whether we are entirely healthy or not, we bring to our new challenge the same value system we always had. We can still find peace and serenity in our lives, for we continue to live our lives as well as we are able.
We owe it to ourselves to search out tranquility — a state in which we feel extremely peaceful, at eas3e with our inner strength, with nature, and with our sense of higher purpose. Walking hand in hand with tranquility creates harmony, a time when our thoughts are orderly and we feel little distress.
I will work on keeping a peaceful mind in order to smooth out my rougher days.
************************************
Food For Thought
Physical Restraint
Self-control is hard work. When the urge comes to do something, which we know is not in our best interest, we physically restrain ourselves from performing the destructive action. This often requires hard, physical effort.
We may want to eat when we should not be eating, we may want to lash out in anger, we may want to retreat from a difficult task, we may want to continue a harmful relationship. Whatever the urge, if we know deep down that it is contrary to God's will for us, we need to control it and not act on it.
Time spent with our Higher Power each day builds the strength and integrity, which can control our destructive urges. Alone, we are powerless, but with the OA program supporting us we find strength we never had before. With abstinence comes the clarity of mind necessary to evaluate our urges and desires.
May I have the moral strength to physically restrain myself when necessary.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
Limitations
“You cannot help men permanently
by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.”
Abraham Lincoln
I love the idea of helping people. Seeing the other person shine after my input gives me a great feeling. The flipside of this peak experience is the sadness and bleakness I feel when the person I am helping does not succeed. When it is all about me, I have to accept responsibility for everything: the good and the bad.
Thank You, God, that it is not really me who is the source of all help, it is You. I can point the way and make suggestions, but I cannot make someone change for the better. What causes people to change is something for which no person can take credit. It is simply divine!
The real question is whether or not the person I want to help will turn to his or her Higher Power and use the help that is offered. I cannot actually take these steps for others. I can pretend to do that, and perhaps offer some temporary relief, but lasting recovery will come only to those who make a quality decision to take the necessary steps on their own.
One day at a time...
I will realize the limitations of my help. I will not try to do for others what only they can and should do for themselves.
~ Q
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Of far more importance was the fact that he was the first living human with whom I had ever talked, who knew what he was talking about in regard to alcoholism from actual experience. In other words, 'he talked my language. He knew all the answers, and certainly not because he had picked them up in his reading. - Pg. 180 - Doctor Bob's Nightmare
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is easier for us to blame others (parents, spouses, friends) for our addiction then it is to look at self. We must never forget that we drank that drink, snorted that coke, toked that joint, and took that fix. US. 'They' didn't do it.
May I never forget that I used too many mind affecting chemicals because I have the disease of addiction! Other reasons are not causes. Everyone has problems yet not everyone suffers from addiction.
Patience with Myself
Today, I will be patient with myself. When I do not do as well as I wish I would, I will not make that a reason to get down on myself. I will instead recognize that the fastest way to bring myself out of a painful funk is through understanding and being good to myself. I needn't get caught in my own cycle of shame, resentment and blame. If a child is upset, I comfort the child because I understand that is what will makes things better. I give myself the same comfort that I would extend to a hurt child knowing that it will help me have the strength to forgive and move on.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We recommend that you take your Third Step every morning and turn your will over to the care of God, as you understand God. Then at night, take a Tenth Step to see how God is doing.
I talk often to my Higher Power. S/He understands better than most people.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
These are not the Steps we discussed, or memorized, or analyzed. These are the steps we took.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It feels so good to know that I am healing from my old wounds. As I bring love and acceptance to myself today I can watch the pain disappear and I feel so much better about myself.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
YET = You're Eligible Too. Anon.
bluidkiti
10-13-2021, 03:22 AM
October 21
Daily Reflections
NOTHING GROWS IN THE DARK
We will want the good that is in us all, even in the worst of us, to flower and to grow.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 10
With the self-discipline and insight gained from practicing Step Ten, I begin to know the
gratifications of sobriety -- not as mere abstinence from alcohol, but as recovery in every
department of my life.
I renew hope, regenerate faith, and regain the dignity of self-respect. I discover the word
"and" in the phrase "and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it."
Reassured that I am no longer always wrong, I learn to accept myself as I am, with a new
sense of the miracles of sobriety and serenity.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Now that we have considered the obligations of real, working members of A.A., let us
examine what the rewards are that have come to us as a result of our new way of living.
First, I understand myself more than I ever did before. I have learned what was the
matter with me and I know now a lot of what makes me tick. I will never be alone again. I
am just one of many who have the illness of alcoholism and one of many who have learned
what to do about it. I am not an odd fish or a square peg in a round hole. I seem to have
found my right place in the world. Am I beginning to understand myself?
Meditation For The Day
"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice and open the door, I
will come in to him and will remain with him and him with me." The knocking of God's
spirit, asking to come into your life, is due to no merit of yours, though it is in response to
the longing of your heart. Keep a listening ear, an ear bent to catch the sound of
the gentle knocking at the door of your heart by the spirit of God. Then open the
door of your heart and let God's spirit come in.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may let God's spirit come into my heart. I pray that it may fill me with an
abiding peace.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Toward Partnership, p. 292
When the distortion of family life through alcohol has been great, a
long period of patient striving may be necessary. After the husband
joins A.A., the wife may become discontented, even highly resentful
that A.A. has done the very thing that all her years of devotion had
failed to do. Her husband may become so wrapped up in A.A. and his
new friends that he is inconsiderately away from home more than
when he drank. Each then blames the other.
But eventually the alcoholic, now fully understanding how much he did
to hurt his wife and children, nearly always takes up his marriage
responsibilities with a willingness to repair what he can and accept
what he can't. He persistently tries all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps in his
home, often with fine results. He firmly but lovingly commences to
behave like a partner instead of like a bad boy.
12 & 12, pp. 118-119
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
What is a disappointment?
Handling My Outlook
Try as we will for success and achievement, we still must face a number of disappointments in our lives. We may be disappointed by a sales presentation that failed, a repair project that became a nightmare, or a vacation plan that turned sour. How can we handle such disappointments in the spirit of the Twelve Step program?
We must remember not to be too hard on ourselves when disappointments occur. Disappoints are part of the human experience, not misfortunes that come only to certain individuals. If we=ve done our best in any situation, we are not responsible if it did not work out.
Even more important, we should use every disappointment as a learning experience. It=s always possible that one disappointment will provide kernels of truth that will help us succeed in our next effort. Many people point to specific disappointments or setbacks as times when they are able to find new direction.
There are even times when disappointment in a lesser enterprise clears the way for success in a larger one. Whatever the outcome, no disappointment need be final---- nor should we take it as proof that we=re somehow inadequate and unworthy.
I will be positive in my outlook, expecting every effort to be effective and successful. If disappointment comes, however, I will take it in stride, knowing that it=s only a temporary detour in my successful life.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.---Anonymous
Nobody’s always wrong. Nobody’s all bad. And that includes us.
Sometimes, we really get down on ourselves. When we do Step Four, we sometimes see only our faults. When we make our Step Ten checkup, we see only our mistakes. We can’t afford to do this. We need to see our strengths too. But even our faults have a good side. Are you stubborn? Good---be stubborn, you know how to hang on to feelings. So, hang on to the good feelings instead of the bad ones.
Each of us is good and wise. What’s good about us got twisted by our disease. But now we can get the kinks out. We are sober, and we have a program to help us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to see the good in myself and others.
Action for the Day: I’ll take another look at my faults today. How can I use them in good ways?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
The strength of the drive determines the force required to suppress it. --Mary Jane Sherfey
We are all struggling to succeed. And each day of our lives we'll be confronted with major or minor adversities that might well interfere with our success. Adversities don't have to hinder us, however. They can strengthen us, if we incorporate them as opportunities for growth.
For many of us, the ability to handle adversity is a fairly recent phenomenon. And not always can we do it securely and with ease. But we are coming to believe that a power greater than ourselves is at hand and will guarantee us all the strength we'll ever need. Knowing that action is always possible, that passive acceptance of any condition need never be necessary are unconditional gifts of living the Twelve Step program.
Our path forward is as certain as our commitment to it, our belief in the strength of the program, and our faith that all is well even when times are troubled. No one ever promised that our new way of life would be always easy. But we have been promised that we'll arrive at our proper destination if we do the footwork and let God do the navigating.
Success is at hand. I will apply what I'm learning, and I'll meet it.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
The two friends spoke of their spiritual experience and told him about the course of action they carried out.
He interrupted: “I used to be strong for the church, but that won’t fix it. I’ve prayed to God on hangover mornings and sworn that I’d never touch another drop but by nine o’clock I’d be boiled as an owl.”
Next day found the prospect more receptive. He had been thinking it over. “Maybe you’re right,” he said. “God ought to be able to do anything.” Then he added, “He sure didn’t do much for me when I was trying to fight this booze racket alone.”
pp. 157-158
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I did odd projects around the house for my parents to earn my keep until I took a job for a local entrepreneur. This job did not offer much opportunity for advancement, nor did it pay very well, but it got me out of the house, and it was challenging in many ways. At this point I was in a vicious battle to control my drinking. I knew that if I took only one drink, I'd lose complete control and drink until I passed out. Nevertheless, I tried day after day to beat this obsession with alcohol.
pp. 323-324
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
But in A.A. we slowly learned that something had to be done about our vengeful resentments, self-pity, and unwarranted pride. We had to see that every time we played the big shot, we turned people against us. We had to see that when we harbored grudges and planned revenge for such defeats, we were really beating ourselves with the club of anger we had intended to use on others. We learned that if we were seriously disturbed, our first need was to quiet that disturbance, regardless of who or what we thought caused it.
p. 47
************************************************** *********
S T E P S = Solutions To Every Problem in Sobriety.
C H A N G E = Choosing Honesty Allows New Growth Every day.
Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that
action.
--Mother Teresa
Joy increases as you give it, and diminishes as you try to keep it for yourself. In giving it,
you will accumulate a deposit of joy greater than you ever believed possible.
--Norman Vincent Peale, Positive Thinking Every Day
God is singing and Creation is the melody.
--David Palmer
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
--unknown
I didn't learn humility with my head. I learned humility with my heart.
--unknown
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CONSCIENCE
"In matters of conscience, the
law of the majority has no
place."
-- Mohandas Gandhi
How I used to hate myself. So many times I caught myself pleasing the crowd, agreeing
with people I did not understand or respect, laughing at jokes and opinions I loathed. How
I used to hate myself!
Today I have a healthy respect for what the majority may feel but I also trust and follow
my conscience. I know that to be in the minority is not necessarily to be in the wrong. My
recovery insists that I listen to my conscience, that inner self that is based on a program
of honesty, that spiritual cornerstone of my life that I have come to trust.
Now I can say to people, "I do not agree." Today I give myself permission to disagree
with family, friends and colleagues.
May I never follow the crowd because of the numbers: God is one.
************************************************** *********
The LORD himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective
shade. The sun will not hurt you by day, nor the moon at night. The LORD keeps you
from all evil and preserves your life. The LORD keeps watch over you as you come and
go, both now and forever.
Psalm 121:5-8
Let me hear of your unfailing love to me in the morning, for I am trusting you. Show me
where to walk, for I have come to you in prayer. Save me from my enemies, LORD; I run
to you to hide me. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. May your gracious
Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing.
Psalm 143:8-10
"Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down."
Proverbs 26:20
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Daily Inspiration
There are far more solutions than problems and knowing this is very empowering. Lord, in the encounters of my daily life, may I choose to be part of the solution rather than part of the problem.
No gift is so precious as love. Gratefully trust God and give Him your love. Lord, I give You my heart.
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NA Just For Today
God's Will Today
"This decision demands continued acceptance, ever - increasing faith, and a daily commitment to recovery."
IP No.14, "One Addict's Experience…"
Sometimes, we really live the Third Step - and it's great! We don't regret the past, we aren't afraid of the future, and we're generally pleased with the present. Sometimes, though, we lose our vision of God's will in our life.
Many of us dream of erasing the mistakes of our past, but the past cannot be erased. Many of us are grateful this is so, for our past experiences have brought us to the recovery we enjoy today. By working the program, we can learn to accept the past and reconcile ourselves with it by amending our wrongs. Those same Twelve Steps can help eliminate our worries over the future. When we practice NA principles on a daily basis in all our affairs, we can leave the results up to our Higher Power.
It seems as though our members with the strongest faith are the ones who are best able to live in the present moment. Enjoyment, appreciation, and gratitude for the quality of our lives - these are the results of faith in life itself. When we practice the principles of our program, today is the only day we need.
Just for today: I will make the most of today, and trust that yesterday and tomorrow are in God's care.
pg. 307
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Great events make me quiet and calm; it is only trifles that irritate my nerves. --Queen Victoria
Isn't that always the way? We cope with major events, like births and weddings, fairly well. It is the little things--so inconsequential in the long run--that upset us. If the kids don't pick up their rooms, or dinner is late, or we can't go to the movies because we haven't done our homework, we become irritated and annoyed. Minor things like these upset us much more than they should.
Are they really so important? A messy room is not a terminal illness. A late dinner won't affect our health unless we get so upset about it we make ourselves sick. We'll survive.
If we think back to the last time we were angry or upset, does it seem important now? We probably can't even remember why we reacted that way. How much better life is when we let go of the little irritations.
What irritation can I let go of today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
No man can produce great things who is not thoroughly sincere in dealing with himself. --James Russell Lowell
We are in the business of producing miracles. The renewal of life in us and others in this program is a great event and happens only after we establish an honest relationship with ourselves. No longer can we excuse our minimizing and little white lies that push aside the truth. No longer can we deny our private fears and self doubts. In our growing sincerity with ourselves, we can admit our weaknesses. Some of us feel inadequate at our work, many of us have feelings that we aren't masculine enough, and many of us feel tempted to return to old destructive behaviors.
In this program we have a renewal based on truth. We build upon solid reality rather than upon fiction. Denying the truth to ourselves always made us weaker and sicker than the facts themselves ever could. Viewing the facts from a new position of acceptance shows they aren't nearly as bad as we thought. Our sincerity with ourselves becomes a solid footing for growth.
My strength today is based upon a sincere relationship with myself.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The strength of the drive determines the force required to suppress it. --Mary Jane Sherfey
We are all struggling to succeed. And each day of our lives we'll be confronted with major or minor adversities that might well interfere with our success. Adversities don't have to hinder us, however. They can strengthen us, if we incorporate them as opportunities for growth.
For many of us, the ability to handle adversity is a fairly recent phenomenon. And not always can we do it securely and with ease. But we are coming to believe that a power greater than ourselves is at hand and will guarantee us all the strength we'll ever need. Knowing that action is always possible, that passive acceptance of any condition need never be necessary are unconditional gifts of living the Twelve Step program.
Our path forward is as certain as our commitment to it, our belief in the strength of the program, and our faith that all is well even when times are troubled. No one ever promised that our new way of life would be always easy. But we have been promised that we'll arrive at our proper destination if we do the footwork and let God do the navigating.
Success is at hand. I will apply what I'm learning, and I'll meet it.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Financial Responsibility
"When I began recovery from chemical dependency, I had to face my money mess stone cold sober, and I really had a mess," said one woman.
"I wasn't able to earn much at first, and it was important to me to make amends. I had past due bills from years before. I needed to try to stay current with my new bills. I had a lot more money before I sobered up. But in time, slowly, gradually, my financial situation cleared up. I restored my credit. I had a checking account. I had a little money in the bank.
"Then I married an alcoholic and began to learn about my codependency - the hard way. I lost myself, my feelings, my sanity, and all the progress I had made with my financial affairs. My husband and I opened a checking account together, and he over drafted checks until I lost the right to have a checking account. I let him charge and charge on my credit card, and he drove that into the ground.
"We borrowed and borrowed to keep our sinking ship afloat - and we borrowed a lot from my parents," she said. "By the time I began my recovery from codependency, I was again facing a real financial mess. I was furious, but it didn't matter who did what. I had some serious financial matters to face if that part of my life was ever going to become manageable again.
"Slowly - very slowly - I began to work out of my mess. It seemed impossible! I didn't even want to face it, it felt so overwhelming and hopeless. But I did. And each day I did the best I could to be responsible for myself.
"One decision I made was to separate and protect myself financially from my husband, the best I could, before and after we divorced. The other decision I made was to face and begin reconstructing the financial affairs in my life.
"It was difficult. We owed over fifty thousand dollars, and my ability to produce income had dramatically decreased. I was grieving; my self-esteem was at an all time low; my energy was low. I did not know how I would ever untangle this nightmare. But it did happen. Slowly, gradually, with the help of a Higher Power, manageability crept in and replaces chaos.
"I began by not spending more than I earned. I paid back some creditors, a little at a time. I let go of what I couldn't do, and focused on what I could do.
"Now, eight years have passed. I am debt free, which I never imagined possible. I am living comfortably, with money in the bank. My credit has been restored, again. And I intend to keep it that way.
"I am not willing to lose my financial sanity and security again, ever, for love or for alcoholism. With the help of God and the Twelve Steps, I won't have to."
One day at a time, we can be restored in recovery - mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and financially. It may get worse before it gets better - because we are finally facing reality instead of dodging it. But once we make the decision to take financial responsibility for ourselves, we are on our way.
God, help me remember that what seems hopeless today can often be solved tomorrow, even if I can't see the solution. If I have allowed the problems of others to hurt me financially, help me repair and restore my boundaries around money - and what I am willing to lose. Help me understand that I do not have to allow anyone else's financial irresponsibility, addiction, disease, or problem to hurt me financially. Help me go on with my life in spite of my present financial circumstances, trusting that if I am willing to make amends and be responsible, things will work out.
Today I know that I am not alone. Today I know that God guides me in all situations and all I have to do to get help is to ask for it. --Ruth Fishel God help me to stay sober and clean today!
*****
Journey to the Heart
Learn to Nurture and Be Nurtured
It was a quiet morning. I was holed up in a hotel room at the mouth of Bryce Canyon, working on this book. Working on my life. I stayed in bed for a while-- thinking, pondering, wondering. Finally I got up, went to the restaurant for coffee and a roll, then went for a drive. Soak up nature, I told myself. This journey is a living meditation.
I drove into Bryce Canyon Park, letting the massive stones, the colors and spirals, the eternity of the canyon touch me, heal me, soothe my soul. An hour later, when I felt calmer and more energized, I got back in the car and headed for the park exit. Several cars were jammed up. I wondered if there had been an accident. Then I saw why the others had stopped. A mother deer was standing on the side of the road, gently nuzzling her fawn. She stood by her off-spring's side, protecting and nurturing.
Many of us barely remember a mother's nurturing love; some of us do, with fondness and joy. Many of us have experienced the great gift of nurturing and loving our children, a joy that opens the heart in a way little else can. Some of us have learned to give and receive nurturing in other ways, to people outside our immediate families. But most of us, along the way, have learned the gift, the wonder, the awe, and the healing blessings of nurturing. Giving and reveiving is a continuous cycle, a necessary part of the road to the heart.
Learn to nurture others. Nurture and love yourself. The whole universe will rally round and help. Others will applaud your efforts and learn from them, the way the passersby stopped to gaze on the deer and her fawn.
Celebrate the power of nurturing. Release its gentle love. It rests inside each of us, waiting to be seen, appreciated, and brought to life.
*****
more language of letting go
Cultivate awareness
Often the words "consciousness" and "awareness" are used interchangebly. ... Consciousness is the pulsing vibration that is the essence of all things. Awareness is the individuating "I AM" in each of us. Wherever I am, my awareness is also. When I move, my awareness goes with me. When I focus my awareness on something, I perceive that thing. Through my physical sensory organs I am aware of sights, sounds, tastes, smells and touch. Through higher sensory perception I am aware of much more.
--Enid Hoffman
Use all your senses, whether you are visualizing the future or sinking into a joyful awareness of where you are right now. Don't just look at the flower-- touch it. Smell it. Feel it.
Don't just gaze at the people in your life. Hear them. Feel their power and presence.
Slow down. Don't move so fast. You'll miss important things. Cultivate awareness. Bring your senses, all of them, into the heart of your life.
Awareness isn't about looking. It's about seeing with more than our eyes. Often when we look for a thing, whether it's a home or a girlfriend, all we can see is our projections-- our hopes, fears, past, and desires.
Relax. Stop projecting yourself onto the world. Let go of judgements. Let things and people be what and who they are.
Cultivate awareness by using all your senses.
Learn to see what is.
God, help me slow down and become aware.
*****
The Joyful Flow
Good Vibrations
Feelings vibrate, just as all things in the universe do, at a particular frequency. Negative feelings like anger, guilt, and depression vibrate at low frequencies, while positive feelings like joy, appreciation, and passion vibrate at high frequencies. These high frequency vibrations make us feel good. This is why people and places that inspire and cultivate positive feelings have what we call good vibrations.
Good vibrations inspire health, happiness, and optimism. When we are tuned in to good vibrations, our bodies heal, our hearts open, and our minds shift toward the light. We see new possibilities and feel powerfully energized to follow our inner visions. At the same time, we feel relaxed and capable of manifesting these visions without giving in to stress or struggle. Good vibrations put us in a state of perfect receptivity so that we feel it is the energy flowing through us that accomplishes what needs to be done. We feel guided, supported, protected, and nourished within this joyful flow. We sometimes forget that we are allowed to feel this way all the time.
Lower frequency vibrations are not bad in a moral sense, but they are bad in the sense that they simply don’t feel good. Still, they have a purpose, which is to alert us to the fact that we are blocking out the higher frequency vibrations that we need to function well. They are a call for healing ourselves from within. The key to our healing lies in remembering that it is our birthright to feel good and that feeling good is the essence of our true nature. When we are receiving and sending out good vibrations, we are in the flow. When we are not, we can begin to raise our vibration by seeking out people, places, and situations that vibrate at a higher frequency. Whether we need to go on retreat or just call a friend who makes us laugh, seeking out those good vibrations and basking in them is a sacred and loving practice that returns us, time and again, to the joyful flow of the universe. Published with permission from Daily OM
*****
A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day
There's a world of difference between the idea of self-love and love of self. Self-love is a reflection of an inflated ego, around which - in our distorted view of our own self-importance - everything must revolve. Self-love is the breeding ground for hostility, arrogance and a host of other character defects which blind us to any point of view but our own. Love of self, in contrast, is an appreciation of our dignity and value as human beings. Love of self is an expression of self-realization, from which springs humility.
Do I believe that I can love others best when I have gained love of self?
Today I Pray
May God, who loves me, teach me to love myself. May I notice that the most arrogant and officious humans are not so completely sure of themselves, after all. Instead, they are apt to have a painfully low self-image, an insecurity which they cloak in pomp and princely trappings. May God show me that when I can like myself, I am duly crediting Him, since every living thing is a work of God.
Today I Will Remember
I will try to like myself.
*****
One More Day
Business runs after nobody; people cling to it of their own free will and think that to be busy is proof of happiness. --Lucius Annacus Seneca
Sometimes we need to keep busy just to fill time. After a loss or health change, we may have great amounts of time to fill. We may turn to busy work --- work having no significance but marking time as we move toward yet another adjustment. Tool-shop organizing, closet cleaning, and other tasks might be ploys we need, emotionally, to perform in rote fashion.
When we are adjusting, we may need to be busy ---- to think, to decide on new plans of action, and to move forward. We won't need busy work, and we'll be able to make gains again. As we make our adjustments, very, very, slowly, the purpose of our lives will return.
I will put effort into my days to find meaning. It may be difficult to stay busy, but I can do it.
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Food For Thought
New Memories
If certain times of the year and certain activities are associated in our minds with overeating, we need to create new memories to blot out the old ones. If we are hung up on past loves, hates, and hurts, we need to let go of them so that we can live in the present.
Old eating habits keep alive old wounds and frustrations. Even after we have maintained abstinence for a significant length of time, we may be troubled by unresolved conflicts from the past. The fact that we are abstaining from compulsive overeating gives us a chance to see the problems more clearly and to then walk away from them when we have done all that we can do to resolve them.
The past and the future are in the hands of our Higher Power. If we work our program now and live the best we can today, we are creating good memories, which will sustain us in the days to come.
Take charge of my memories. Lord.
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One Day At A Time
Ready
“If we wait for the moment when everything,
absolutely everything is ready, we shall never begin.”
Ivan Turgenev
This was one of my biggest obstacles in recovery: I wanted everything to be perfect. This type of thinking kept me stuck for many years in the disease. Instead of my program being One Day At A Time, it was always "one day later and I will do your will God."
Now I know that today is all I have. I have no guarantees for tomorrow. So I let go and let God, and do the best I can. I have discovered that I do not have to work a perfect program. Not everything has to be just “right.”
One day at a time...
One day at a time I do the footwork that is required of me and leave the results to God.
~ Terri
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right-about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people! - Pg. 31 - More About Alcoholism
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Infatuation with our past life tends to produce a false sense of security based on wishful thinking. 'Those people like me; I understand what they expect of me; they aren't phonies.' In the end we find those old securities only lasted as long as our usefulness did.
God, as I understand You, may I not be infatuated with wishful thinking of 'the good old days!'
Blaming Others
Today, I understand that dumping blame on someone else does not relieve pain or make my life better in any way. If I reach out to others by attacking and blaming them, how can I expect them to hear anything that I say? If I want to be heard, I need to risk being see -- not as I wish to be seen but as I am. I ask too much of someone else when I say obnoxious things and yet insist on being heard. If I really want someone to understand me, I need to risk being vulnerable and let me feelings show. Pointing a finger at someone else will only make them want to point a finger at me. It is hard to feel vulnerable, but with practice, it will become easier. I will be left with more of my real self if I don't tear at the self of someone else.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Sarcasm is derived from a Greek word meaning 'to tear flesh!' We know that the only weapon that gets sharper with use is the tongue.
I use my wit to amuse and not to abuse.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know that I am not alone. Today I know that God guides me in all situations and all I have to do to get help is to ask for it.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Our 2nd Tradition says that a loving God speaks through our group conscience. So I have the assurance that if I go to a meeting, willing to listen, there'll probably be a wino in the room who'll hit me right between the eyes with exactly what I need to hear. - Doug D.
bluidkiti
10-13-2021, 03:22 AM
October 22
Daily Reflections
TRUE TOLERANCE
Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are to some extent
emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong, and then we approach true tolerance and see
what real love for our fellows actually means.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 92
The thought occurred to me that all people are emotionally ill to some extent. How could
we not be? Who among us is spiritually perfect? Who among us is physically perfect?
How could any of us be emotionally perfect? Therefore, what else are we to do but bear
with one another and treat each other as we would be treated in similar circumstances?
That is what love really is.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I am content to face the rest of my life without alcohol. I have made the great decision
once and for all. I have surrendered as gracefully as possible to the inevitable. I hope I
have no more reservations. I hope that nothing can happen to me now that would justify
my taking a drink. No death of a dear one. No great calamity in any area of my life
should justify me in drinking. Even if I were on some desert isle, far from the rest of the
world, but not far from God, should I ever feel it right to drink. For me, alcohol is
out--period. I will always be safe unless I take that first drink. Am I fully resigned to
this fact?
Meditation For The Day
Day by day we should slowly build up an unshakable faith in a Higher Power in that
Power's ability to give us all the help we need. By having these quiet times each morning,
we start each day with a renewing of our faith, until it becomes almost a part of us and is a
strong habit. We should keep furnishing the quiet places of our souls with all the furniture
of faith. We should try to fill our thoughts each day with all that is harmonious and good,
beautiful, and enduring.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may build a house in my soul for the spirit of God to dwell in. I pray that I
may come at last to an unshakable faith.
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As Bill Sees It
Rebellion Or Acceptance, p.293
All of us pass through the times when we can pray only with the
greatest exertion. Occasionally we go even further than this. We
are seized with a rebellion so sickening that we simply won't pray.
When these things happen, we should not think too ill of ourselves.
We should simply resume prayer as soon as we can, doing what we
know to be good for us.
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A man who persists in prayer finds himself in possession of great
gifts. When he has to deal with hard circumstances, he finds he can
face them. He can accept himself and the world around him.
He can do this because he now accepts a God who is All--and who
loves all. When he says, "Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be
Thy name," he deeply and humbly means it. When in good
meditation and thus freed from the clamors of the world, he knows
that he's in God's hands, that his own ultimate destiny is really
secure, here and hereafter, come what may.
1. TWELVE AND TWELVE, p. 105
2. GRAPEVINE, JUNE 1958
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Walk In Dry Places
When the bath is negative
Personal relations
A member referred to getting a "negative bath" every day at work. She was talking about her boss's bad disposition and the poor attitudes of several co-workers. How does one deal with this negativity?
It's not satisfactory to say that this member created her own "negative bath" by her attitudes toward her boss and others. In fact, in many businesses, the atmosphere is negative... and dealing with it takes more than trite comment.
In such situations, we can employ detachment, as practiced in Al-Anon, and accept the things we cannot change, as stated in the Serenity Prayer.
The longer-term solution may require making a major change, such as finding a new job, but we must be careful not to exchange one negative situation for another. We will make the right decision if we're careful to avoid resentment and self-pity while being completely honest about our own motives and intentions.
I may find myself in a "negative bath" of some kind today, but I can detach from it by avoiding resentment or the tendency to blame others.
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Keep It Simple
Life is what happens to us while we’re making other plans.
---Thomas LaMance
What happened to our years of drinking and using other drugs? They seemed to pass so quickly with so little to show for them. We had plans, but we didn’t get where we wanted to go. There was always “tomorrow.”
What a difference today! Now we work a program that helps us really live each day. We’re not losing time out of our lives anymore. Now every day is full of life: sights, sounds, people, feelings---those things we used to miss out on. We have the help of a Higher Power who makes every day important.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me do Your will for me today. I place this day in Your care.
Action for the Day: Be on the lookout today for signs of life!
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Each Day a New Beginning
Children awaken you own sense of self when you see them hurting, struggling, testing; when you watch their eyes and listen to their hearts. Children are gifts, if we accept them. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly
Children look to us and their world with fresh eyes, uncynical attitudes, open hearts. They react spontaneously to the events in their lives; what they feel is who they are.
Close observation of children can help us. See how complex we have made our lives! Their simple honesty can serve us well. To look at the world, once again, with wonder, is a byproduct offered us when we live the principles of this program.
So many gifts await us when we accept the program and its principles. We dispense with the baggage of the past. We learn to live this day only. And we come to believe that there is a power greater than ourselves that has everything and us in our lives under control. Children instinctively trust those who take care of them. We can learn to trust, once again, when we apply the Steps of this program to our lives.
I will look to this day with wonder and trust. Everything is okay. I am in the care of a power greater.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
On the third day the lawyer gave his life to the care and direction of his Creator, and said he was perfectly willing to do anything necessary. His wife came, scarcely daring to be hopeful, though she thought she saw something different about her husband already. He had begun to have a spiritual experience.
That afternoon he put on his clothes and walked from the hospital a free man. He entered a political campaign, making speeches, frequenting men’s gathering places of all sorts, often staying up all night. He lost the race by only a narrow margin. But he had found God—and in finding God had found himself.
That was in June, 1935. He never drank again. He too, has become a respected and useful member of his community. He has helped other men recover, and is a power in the church from which he was long absent.
p. 158
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I picked up a half gallon of whiskey one day after work and drank over one-third of it in less than four hours that same night. I was so sick the next day, but I made it to work. When I got home from work, I sat on my parents' sofa and knew, I knew, I would start working on the half gallon again, despite the fact that I was still very ill from the night before. I also knew that I did not want to drink. Sitting on that sofa, I realized that the old, "I could stop if I wanted to, I just don't want to" didn't apply here, because I did not want to drink. I watched myself get up off the sofa and pour myself a drink. When I sat back down on the sofa, I started to cry. My denial had cracked; I believe I hit bottom that night, but I didn't know it then; I just thought I was insane. I proceeded to finish the half gallon.
p. 324
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
To see how erratic emotions victimized us often took a long time. We could perceive them quickly in others, but only slowly in ourselves. First of all, we had to admit that we had many of these defects, even though such disclosures were painful and humiliating. Where other people were concerned, we had to drop the word "blame" from our speech and thought. This required great willingness even to begin. But once over the first two or three high hurdles, the course ahead began to look easier. For we had started to get perspective on ourselves, which is another way of saying that we were gaining in humility.
pp. 47-48
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With the power of God in my actions and thinking I can do all things with love and
kindness.
--Shelley
"God Loves You - even when you are not looking."
He created me to be a light of love and life. Letting go, I allow the light of Him within me
to shine forth in my life and out into my world.
--unknown
Express love through acknowledgment. Notice the good in those around you and freely
comment on it.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
The value of persistent prayer is not that He will hear us, but we will finally hear Him.
--William McGill
We are not living just to be sober; we are living to learn, to serve, and to love.
The express elevator to sobriety doesn't work - please use the Steps.
S T E P S = Solutions To Every Problem in Sobriety.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
UNITY
"This land of ours cannot be a
good place for any of us to live
in unless we make it a good
place for all of us to live in."
-- Richard Nixon
My sobriety has given me a comprehensive view of life and my neighbor. Today I believe
that we are all connected and if I hurt or am hurt, then everybody at some level is
affected. Because we are all children of God, it follows that we are all one big family ---
speaking different languages, having different customs, revealing different
physical characteristics and complexions, requiring different satisfaction (both sexual
and emotional), but we are still one big family under God.
This means I have a responsibility to all in the family and I can best exercise that
responsibility by having a healthy respect for myself. I should treat people as I would
want to be treated, allowing them the freedom and love I require in my life. I am the
key to the world's needs.
Lord, let me find my neighbor in myself.
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"Just as it is bearing fruit and growing in the whole world, so it has been bearing fruit
among yourselves from the day you heard it and truly comprehended the grace of
God."
Colossians 1:6
"You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your
strength."
Deuteronomy 6:5
For your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom. You rule generation after generation. The
LORD is faithful in all he says; he is gracious in all he does. The LORD helps the fallen
and lifts up those bent beneath their loads. All eyes look to you for help; you give them
their food as they need it. When you open your hand, you satisfy the hunger and thirst of
every living thing.
Psalm 145:13-16
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Daily Inspiration
Do not take any action until you've prayed and listened and then you will have guidance to reach the understanding necessary to complete the things you need to do. Lord, I know that there is no obstacle for You and ask that You will guide me along the right path.
Rejoice and be happy for others when they are blessed. Lord, bless me with the ability to be free of envy so that I can truly share the joy of my neighbors.
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NA Just For Today
Look Who's Talking
"Our disease is so cunning that it can get us into impossible situations."
Basic Text, p.80
Some of us say, "My disease is talking to me." Others say, "My head won't turn off." Still others refer to "the committee in my mind" or "the monkey on my back." Let's face it. We suffer from an incurable malady that continues to affect us, even in recovery. Our disease gives us warped information about what's going on in our lives. It tells us not to look at ourselves because what we'll see is too scary. Sometimes it tells us we're not responsible for ourselves and our actions; other times, it tells us that everything wrong with the world is our fault. Our disease tricks us into trusting it.
The NA program provides us with many voices that counter our addiction, voices we can trust. We can call our sponsor for a reality check. We can listen to the voice of an addict trying to get clean. The ultimate solution is to work the steps and draw on the strength of a Higher Power. That will get us through those times when "our disease is talking."
Just for today: I will ignore the "voice" of my addiction. I will listen to the voice of my program and a Power greater than myself.
pg. 308
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Sometimes it takes a rainy day just to let you know, everything's gonna be alright. --Cris Williamson
Rainy days let us slow down. We are busy people, driving ourselves to go places and get things done. But rain seems to slow life down, even in our hearts. And slowing down can show us the peace in our lives, the peace of knowing we have all we need right inside us. The pressures of the world can drop away for a time while we reflect.
As the rain soaks into the ground, its serenity enters our hearts. Leaves on trees begin to look more green. Plants and flowers are no longer thirsty. When we slow down, we can be comforted by what we have in our hearts, knowing everything is going to be all right.
What comfort can I find within myself right now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Self-righteousness is a loud din raised to drown the voice of guilt within us. --Eric Hoffer
A holier-than-thou attitude within us is often a sign of unconscious dishonesty. Who hasn't had the feeling of being superior to the angry outburst or the near slip of another man - and then found himself in the very same spot the next day? What we least want to admit about ourselves is what we are most likely to feel self-righteous about.
Since our blind spots and self-deception leave us vulnerable to returning to old behaviors, we must attack them vigorously. The man we feel most self-righteous toward may be the man we could learn the most from. When we stop focusing on him, we may notice he touches our most sensitive area. We're all creatures of God and equals in God's sight. The ways we create inequality are the ways we fall short of God's wisdom.
I will use my self-righteous feelings to point me to my own blind spots.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Children awaken you own sense of self when you see them hurting, struggling, testing; when you watch their eyes and listen to their hearts. Children are gifts, if we accept them. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly
Children look to us and their world with fresh eyes, uncynical attitudes, open hearts. They react spontaneously to the events in their lives; what they feel is who they are.
Close observation of children can help us. See how complex we have made our lives! Their simple honesty can serve us well. To look at the world, once again, with wonder, is a byproduct offered us when we live the principles of this program.
So many gifts await us when we accept the program and its principles. We dispense with the baggage of the past. We learn to live this day only. And we come to believe that there is a power greater than ourselves that has everything and us in our lives under control. Children instinctively trust those who take care of them. We can learn to trust, once again, when we apply the Steps of this program to our lives.
I will look to this day with wonder and trust. Everything is okay. I am in the care of a power greater.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Holding Your Own
Trust yourself. Trust what you know.
Sometimes, it is hard to stand in our own truth and trust what we know, especially when others would try to convince us otherwise.
In these cases, others may be dealing with issues of guilt and shame. They may have their own agenda. They may be immersed in denial. They would like us to believe that we do not know what we know; they would like us not to trust ourselves; they would prefer to engage us in their nonsense.
We don't have to forfeit our truth or our power to others. That is codependency.
Believing lies is dangerous. When we stop trusting our truth, when we repress our instincts, when we tell ourselves there must be something wrong with us for feeling what we feel or believing what we believe, we deal a deadly blow to our self and our health.
When we discount that important part of ourselves that knows what is the truth, we cut ourselves off from our center. We feel crazy. We get into shame, fear, and confusion. We can't get our bearings when we allow someone to pull the rug from under us.
This does not mean that we are never wrong. But we are not always wrong.
Be open. Stand in our truth. Trust what you know. And refuse to buy into denial, nonsense, bullying, or coercion that would like to take you off course.
Ask to be shown the truth, clearly - not by the person trying to manipulate or convince you, but by yourself, your Higher Power, and the Universe.
Today, I will trust my truth, my instincts, and my ability to ground myself in reality. I will not allow myself to be swayed by bullying, manipulating, games, dishonesty, or people with peculiar agendas.
Today I pray for the knowledge of God's Will for me and the power to carry it through. --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey to the Heart
Heal Your Past
Open your heart to the universe. Let it bring you love and comfort. Let it bring you healing. Let it take you back to your past long enough to heal, so you can move forward into joy.
Universal love can bring something other than straightforward movement. Sometimes it takes us backward into our past and leaves us there long enough to heal. An incident occurs, and we react strongly; our emotions are more intense than necessary for the present moment. We may not notice. We may think, This is now; this is how I'm feeling about what's happening today. But as we become more aware, some part of us says, I'm feeling something from yesterday,too, something I wasn't safe rnough to see and feel then.
Let yourself feel your past. Then let yourself heal. Take responsibility for your behaviors. Let the emotions clear. Then you will see what the universe has done. It has just created a healing scenario for you-- a gentle trigger to the past, a gentle step forward for your heart.
*****
more language of letting go
Be aware of your heroes
Heroes and mentors can inspire and teach us to do great things in our lives. They can help point us in the right direction whenr we're unsure. They can bring us just the right message, at just the right time. Usually we can find someone who has walked the path before us, and can lead us with his or her example. The problem comes when he or she stops being a mentor to us and becomes an idol instead. If we spend too much time revering an individual, we can easily lose sight of the message.
Take a look at the people in your life that you have chosen as mentors, heroes, sponsors, or teachers. Appreciate all the help they give you. But be aware that they don't and can't have all the answers. They're human,too. They to have blind spots, prejudices, and their own lessons to go through. And yes, they'll make mistakes. But if their hearts are true, they'll come back to the path. And if your heart is true, maybe you'll be a light helping guide them there.
Listen to your mentors. Respect then for who they are. Be grateful for the inspiration and messages that come through them to you. But don;t worship your heroes.
Learn to think for yourself as well.
God, help me remember that it's the message, not the messenger, that counts. Thank you for my heroes, teachers, and mentors, but help me remember not to lift them up too high.
*****
Spiritualizing the Planet
Ascension by Madisyn Taylor
As we ascend, we gain consciousness of the more subtle aspects of our being and begin to connect with all that is.
We are one with the cosmos whether we realize it or not. Realizing it, though, quickens our spiritual energy and allows us access to higher realms. In those higher realms lies the awareness that we are more than just finite physical beings living one life in one place at one point in time. Connecting with this awareness is to awaken to the truth and take a step forward, and upward, on our soul’s journey. This upward movement is known as ascension because the more we remember who we are and embody that truth, the higher our energy vibrates; we ascend up the scale from the gross physical plane to the subtle spiritual plane. As we ascend, we gain consciousness of the more subtle aspects of our being, with the ultimate outcome being a complete identification with the light body, an experience of unification with the cosmos.
As you look around you, you will see that many people are not even interested in these ideas. Others are open and paying attention. Still others have devoted their lives to deepening their understanding of the truth. All these people are on the path of ascension, but they will ascend at different rates. Each soul chooses its own path. The more devoted a person is to remembering and being guided by spirit, the more quickly the soul will ascend. These people are at the forefront of an important process of raising the energetic vibration of the whole planet. The earth, made of the same energy we are, is undergoing this shift along with us. This evolutionary process, while seemingly chaotic at times, is as natural as the process that unfolds a flower from a seed and we are all part of it.
It shouldn’t be forgotten that the earth too is on her own ascension path as she is sentient. The best way to support this process in yourself and in the world is simply to relax and be open to its unfolding. Listen to your inner guidance, and let it guide you to the path that brings your heart the most joy. Published with permission Daily OM
*****
A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day
"Not all those who know their minds know their hearts as well," wrote LaRochefoucauld. The Program is of inestimable value for those of us, formerly addicted, who want to know ourselves and who are courageous enough to seek growth through self-examination and self-improvement. If I remain honest, open-minded and willing, The Program will enable me to rid myself of my self-deceptive attitudes and character flaws that for so long prevented me from growing into the kind of person I want to be.
Do I try to help others understand The Program and Twelve Steps? Do I carry the message by example?
Today I Pray
I ask God's blessing for the group, which has shown me so much about myself that I was not willing to face on my own. May I have the courage to be confronted and to confront, not only to be honest for honesty's sake - which may be reason enough - but to allow myself and the others in the group to grow in self-knowledge.
Today I Will Remember
We are mirrors of each other.
************************************
One More Day
This is the bitterest knowledge among men, to have much knowledge but no power.
–Herodotus
We have the power to influence others’ lives only when we share what we have learned. If we fail to or refuse to recognize the value of our knowledge, we force ourselves into a sort of isolation and — worse still — deprive others of our insights.
We know how to handle intricate personal relationships and delicate problems. We have gained the emotional stability to allow ourselves to depend on others and on our Higher Power. We can share this knowledge with others, not to serve our own needs, but to help our fellow human beings.
A loving power is mine when I gently share the knowledge I have with others.
************************************
Food For Thought
Healing
God, as understood by each of us, has the Power to heal our bodies, minds, and hearts. Once we realize that we are sick, we can open ourselves to the Power, which will affect our recovery. As we delve more deeply into the OA program, we see that it is not only the body, which suffers from the disease of compulsive overeating. Mind and emotions are also muddled and in need of God's cleansing.
The healing process can be painful. Sometimes we have to get worse in order to get better. Sometimes we have to be more devastated by overeating, by pride, by fear and selfishness before we are willing to turn ourselves over to our Higher Power for healing. We do not make the effort to work the Twelve Steps until we see how desperately ill we are.
God heals, but He requires our cooperation and effort. The extent of our recovery is determined by the intensity of our desire to get well. When our desire is focused on the source of health and held there steadily, we can become whole.
We pray for healing.
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One Day At A Time
Scars
“Dwelling on the negative
simply contributes to its power.”
Shirley MacLaine
I’ve lived most of my life filled with bitterness towards people, God and myself. My mind, soul, and body were consumed by hatred, self-pity, pain, hopelessness, and a complete sense of powerlessness. I focused my energy on reviewing my scars. I counted them, checked them, nurtured them, and flaunted them. They were proof of all the wrongs I’d endured. They were my source of energy. They were my identity. They were my badge of sorrow.
As I work my recovery, I am beginning to see everything from a new perspective. Gradually my head is lifted and my eyes are turned away from my once-beloved scars. The more I allow myself to accept that my powerlessness is not a prison of doom, the more I discover that it is my doorway to faith, surrender, and serenity.
My scars are still here. There is no magic potion to remove them. What is magical, however, is that I see them so differently. I find that I have a choice to make every day: I can cherish my scars as proof of the pain I have suffered, or I can be thankful for them as evidence of things I have survived. Scar tissue forms and creates a stronger, thicker skin in its place. I can either pick at it and make it bleed, or I can welcome the lessons and endurance it has built into my life.
One day at a time...
I will choose to see my scars as proof of the difficulties I have survived. I will choose to appreciate them as evidence that God has brought me through suffering and has used all things to strengthen my faith in Him, my hope for tomorrow, and my serenity for today.
~ Lisa
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
It is probably true that you and your husband have been living too much alone, for drinking many times isolates the wife of an alcoholic. Therefore, you probably need fresh interests and a great cause to live for as much as your husband. If you cooperate, rather than complain, you will find that his excess enthusiasm will tone down. Both of you will awaken to a new sense of responsibility for others. You, as well as your husband, ought to think of what you can put into life instead of how much you can take out. Inevitably your lives will be fuller for doing so. You will lose the old life to find one much better. - Pgs. 119-120 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
By now you may be hearing things you don't like. It can be difficult to accept the truth, but eventually most of it will make sense. For now, just listen without argument--let things settle a little before you discard them.
Even if I don't agree or accept everything told to me now, rather then outright discard it, let me listen, file away for future reference, and process the information later.
Releasing of Perfectionism
Today, I will not demand that my life be perfect in order for me to love it, nor will I demand that all my relationships be perfect for me to value and respect them. If I try to make my life and relationships perfect, I will be constantly engaged in a neurotic battle with my transitory illusion of perfection. There is no such thing as an ideal, and to insist that life be ideal is to miss the forest for the trees. I will not condemn myself to the constant feeling that I have drawn the short straw. Perfection is in the eyes of the beholder -- it is subjective. I will not ask the moment to be more than the moment -- I will not be conditional in my love.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
It has been said that we are not human beings having a spiritual experience but spiritual beings having a human experience. As a dream is to your human experience, addiction is to your spiritual experience. When you awake, you realize it no longer has power over you.
Sometimes I need a rude awakening before I can have a spiritual awakening.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Recovery is an inside job.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I pray for the knowledge of God's Will for me and the power to carry it through.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The bigger my head. The bigger the target. Anon.
bluidkiti
10-13-2021, 03:23 AM
October 23
Daily Reflections
WHAT WE KNOW BEST
"Shoemaker, stick to thy last!" . . . better do one thing supremely well than many badly.
That is the central theme of this Tradition [Five]. Around it our Society gathers in unity.
The very life of our Fellowship requires the preservation of this principle.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 150
The survival of A.A. depends upon unity. What would happen if a group decided to
become an employment agency, a treatment center or a social service agency? Too much
specialization leads to no specialization, to frittering of efforts and, finally, to decline. I
have the qualifications to share my sufferings and my way of recovery with the newcomer.
Conformity to A.A.'s primary purpose insures the safety of the wonderful gift of sobriety,
so my responsibility is enormous. The life of millions of alcoholics is closely tied to my
competence in "carrying the message to the still-suffering alcoholic."
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I have learned how to be honest. What a relief! No more ducking or dodging. No more tall
tales. No more pretending to be what I am not. My cards are on the table, for all the
world to see. "I am what I am," as Popeye used to say in the comics. I have had an
unsavory past. I am sorry, yes. But it cannot be changed now. All that is yesterday and is
done. But now my life is an open book. Come and look at it, if you want to. I'm trying to
do the best I can. I will fail often, but I won't make excuses. I will face things as they are
and not run away. Am I really honest?
Meditation For The Day
Though it may seem a paradox, we must believe in spiritual forces which we cannot
see more than in material things which we can see, if we are going to truly live. In the
last analysis, the universe consists more of thought or mathematical formulas than it
does of matter as we understand it. Between one human being and another only
spiritual forces will suffice to keep them in harmony. These spiritual forces we know,
because we can see their results although we cannot see them. A changed life--a new
personality--results from the power of unseen spiritual forces working in us and through
us.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may believe in the Unseen. I pray that I may be convinced by the results of
the Unseen which I do see.
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As Bill Sees It
Love+Rationality=Growth, p. 294
"It seems to me that the primary object of any human being is to
grow, as God intended, that being the nature of all growing things.
"Our search must be for what reality we can find, which includes
the best definition and feeling of love that we can acquire. If the
capability of loving is in the human being, then it must surely be in his
Creator.
"Theology helps me in that many of its concepts cause me to
believe that I live in a rational universe under a loving God, and
that my own irrationality can be chipped away, little by little. This
is, I suppose, the process of growth for which we are intended."
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
How do we hurt others?
Inventory
Even while drinking, few of us abused others physically or committed crimes. Yet we did harm others, even when we thought we were hurting only ourselves.
One way we harmed others.... and this applies to many alcoholic family relationships.. was by with-holding the love and support they needed. If we had a nasty disposition at times, this poisoned the atmosphere and made others uncomfortable and afraid.
Maybe we harmed others by not being productive at work. Our absenteeism, for example, may have put our boss in a bad light with superiors or caused the firm to lose a client.
Perhaps the worst harm was in being completely indifferent to what we were doing to others. Any willingness to admit wrong, then, can be a major step toward recovery and self-improvement.
Though, I have no intention of harming anyone today, I'll realize that even my attitude can affect others unfavorably. I'll try to maintain an attitude that's uplifting to everyone.
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Keep It Simple
It’s not dying faith that’s so hard, it’s living up to it.William Makepeace Thackeray
We may ask, “Do I have to do an Eighth or Ninth Step?” “Do I really need a sponsor?” “Hmm…can I get by without going to so many meetings?” Having faith means putting our questions aside. So…what do we do? We work the program. We accept that those who’ve gone before us were right. We accept the idea that we need others. Faith is knowing that others love and care for us. Faith is also about action. The main way we know that we have faith is by looking at our behavior. Ask yourself this: “Are my actions those of a person with faith?”
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me remove the questions that get in my way. Help me act like a person with faith.
Action for the Day: I’ll list four parts of my program that I have faith in, such as, “I believe honesty is important to my sobriety.”
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Each Day a New Beginning
...words are more powerful than perhaps anyone suspects, and once deeply engraved in a child's mind, they are not easily eradicated. --May Sarton
How burdened we became, as little girls, with the labels applied by parents, teachers, even school chums. We believe about ourselves what others teach us to believe. The messages aren't always overt. But even the very subtle ones are etched in our minds, and they remind us of our "shortcomings" long into adulthood.
Try as we might to forget the criticisms, the names, they linger in our memories and influence our self-perceptions as adults. The intervening years have done little to erase whatever emotional scars we acquired as children.
Our partnership with God will help us understand that we are spiritual beings with a wonderful purpose in this life. And we are as lovely, as capable, as successful as we perceive ourselves to be. Our own thoughts and words, our own labels can become as powerful as those of our youth. It takes practice to believe in ourselves. But we can break the past's hold on us.
My higher power will help me know the real me. I am all that I ever needed to be; I am special, and I will come to believe that.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
So, you see, there were three alcoholics in that town, who now felt they had to give to others what they had found, or be sunk. After several failures to find others, a fourth turned up. He came through an acquaintance who had heard the good news. He proved to be a devil-may-care young fellow whose parents could not make out whether he wanted to stop drinking or not. They were deeply religious people, much shocked by their son’s refusal to have anything to do with the church. He suffered horribly from his sprees, but it seemed as if nothing could be done for him. He consented, however, to go to the hospital, where he occupied the very room recently vacated by the lawyer.
He had three visitors. After a bit, he said, “The way you fellows put this spiritual stuff makes sense. I’m ready to do business. I guess the old folks were right after all.” So one more was added to the Fellowship.
pp. 158-159
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
Six months later my boss flew me to California for a trade show. I hated working the shows, but I loved to travel, so I went. I was extremely nervous about this trip because my boss like to party and we were flying in a guy our age from Hawaii to work the show with us. At this point I had managed to hold together thirty-one days without a drink, and I was terrified that I would give in to the temptation of being on an all-expenses-paid trip in a fun city with two party animals. It had been very difficult for me to stay dry for thirty-one days; the obsession spoke to me every day.
pp. 324-325
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Of course the depressive and the power-driver are personality extremes, types with which A.A. and the whole world abound. Often these personalities are just as sharply defined as the examples given. But just as often some of us will fit more or less into both classifications. Human beings are never quite alike, so each of us, when making an inventory, will need to determine what his individual character defects are. Having found the shoes that fit, he ought to step into them and walk with new confidence that he is at last on the right track.
p. 48
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Honesty is something you can't wear out.
--Waylon Jennings
And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can
see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
--Antoine de Saint- [The Little Prince]
"Sometimes we need to look hard at a person and remember that he is doing the best
he can. He's just trying to find his way. That's all."
--Ernest Thompson
"God's gift to us is our life. What we do with it, is our gift to God."
An error is a positive way to learn provided you make the attempt to correct the mistake.
--unknown
"It is not what we see and touch or that which others do for us which makes us happy; it is
that which we think and feel and do, first for the other fellow and then for ourselves."
--Helen Keller
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
VALUE
"A cynic is a man who knows the
price of everything and value of
nothing."
-- Oscar Wilde
I never knew the value of my life until I looked beyond it. For years I was so
self-obsessed that I missed the joy and beauty of this wonderful world. I was so
concerned with details and minutia of life that I missed the fun of living.
I now see that my behavior had its roots in my childhood. I was the child in a
dysfunctional family. I became a parent to my parents. I took charge of everybody's
life and I felt responsible and guilty. Everything was work and I did not learn how to
play.
Today I am working on my recovery. I am "dumping" my feelings of guilt, shame and
anger. I am beginning to understand that I am not responsible for my parents and I
am beginning to feel free. Today I am learning how to play.
Lord of the dance, teach me the steps.
************************************************** *********
"Therefore take careful heed to yourselves, that you love the Lord your God."
Joshua 23:11
"What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul?"
Matthew 16:26
"Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler And from the perilous
pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers, And under His wings you shall take
refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler."
Psalm 91:3-4
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Daily Inspiration
Start an "I am grateful for..." list and read it when you are feeling low. Lord, help me see things in a new light and understand that with a little effort I can turn my complaints into something positive.
We are the only ones who can change how we think or how we act. Lord, help me make positive decisions so that life doesn't just happen to me.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Surrender
"By surrendering control, we gain a far greater power."
Basic Text, p.43
When we were using, we did everything we could to run things our way. We used every scheme imaginable to bring our world under control. When we got what we wanted, we felt powerful, invincible; when we didn't, we felt vulnerable, defeated. But that didn't stop us - it only led to more efforts to control and manipulate our lives into a manageable state.
Scheming was our way of denying our powerlessness. As long as we could distract ourselves with our plans, we could put off accepting that we were out of control. Only gradually did we realize that our lives had become unmanageable and that all the conning and manipulating in the world was not going to put our lives back in order.
When we admit our powerlessness, we stop trying to control and manage our way to a better life - we surrender. Lacking sufficient power of our own, we seek a Power greater than ourselves; needing support and guidance, we ask that Power to care for our will and our lives. We ask others in recovery to share their experience with living the NA program instead of trying to program our own lives. The power and direction we seek is all around us; we need only turn away from self to find it.
Just for today: I will not try to scheme and manipulate my way to a manageable life. Through the NA program, I will surrender myself to my Higher Power's care.
pg. 309
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. --D. H. Lawrence
Sometimes when we feel sorry for ourselves we will sit alone in our bedroom. We may even feel so down in the dumps that we decide to stay there, indulging in self-pity, thinking about how the world is against us.
However, if we use our imagination to step outside our own point of view for a moment, we might think differently. If we were deer in the forest, we would be thinking about keeping safe from the wolves, and where our next meal would be coming from.
The animals have no time to feel sorry for themselves, they are too busy doing what has to be done to survive, and each thing that happens presents a new survival problem to be solved.
When we feel blue, it helps to keep this in mind. If we have the time to feel down, and can get physically comfortable while doing it, how bad can the problem really be?
In what ways is my life comfortable, easy, and full of love?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Self-knowledge and self-improvement are very difficult for most people. It usually needs great courage and long struggle. --Abraham Maslow
This is a simple program but it isn't easy. We cannot take the principles we learn and thereby possess them as if we were taking a class or reading a book. We need to live them. We can only get this program by participating with others who are also on the journey. Gradually we absorb it into every fiber of our being. This takes time and dedication.
The honesty required is sometimes frightening and painful. Any man who remains faithful to this program has great courage and deserves deep respect. But we do not have to wait long to begin receiving the rewards. New freedoms, good feelings, and friendships quickly develop, and we are promised in this program to continue growing and to receive more benefits throughout our lives. What rewards have come from our courage and struggle?
I will give much to my spiritual growth because it gives much to me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...words are more powerful than perhaps anyone suspects, and once deeply engraved in a child's mind, they are not easily eradicated. --May Sarton
How burdened we became, as little girls, with the labels applied by parents, teachers, even school chums. We believe about ourselves what others teach us to believe. The messages aren't always overt. But even the very subtle ones are etched in our minds, and they remind us of our "shortcomings" long into adulthood.
Try as we might to forget the criticisms, the names, they linger in our memories and influence our self-perceptions as adults. The intervening years have done little to erase whatever emotional scars we acquired as children.
Our partnership with God will help us understand that we are spiritual beings with a wonderful purpose in this life. And we are as lovely, as capable, as successful as we perceive ourselves to be. Our own thoughts and words, our own labels can become as powerful as those of our youth. It takes practice to believe in ourselves. But we can break the past's hold on us.
My higher power will help me know the real me. I am all that I ever needed to be; I am special, and I will come to believe that.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Morning Cues
There is an important message for us first thing every day.
Often, once we get started with the day, we may not listen as closely to life and ourselves as we do in those still moments when we first awaken.
An ideal time to listen to ourselves is when we are laying quietly, our defenses are down, and we're open and most vulnerable.
What is the first feeling that floods through us, the feeling that perhaps we are trying to avoid during the business of the day? Are we angry, frustrated, hurt, or confused? That is what we need to focus on and work through. That's the issue we need to address.
When you awaken, what is the first idea or thought that enters your mind? Do you need to finish a timely project? Are you in need of a fun day? A restful day?
Do you feel sick and need to nurture yourself? Are you in a negative frame of mind? Do you have an issue to resolve with someone?
Do you need to tell someone something? Is something bothering you? Is something feeling particularly good?
Does an idea occur to you, something you could get or do that would feel good?
When you awaken, what is the first issue that presents itself? You don't have to be fearful. You don't have to rush. You can lay still and listen and then accept the message.
We can define some of our recovery goals for the day by listening to the morning message.
God, help me let go of my need to be in resistance to the harmonic flow of life. Help me learn to go with the flow and accept the help and support that You have to offer me.
God is guiding me with every step and every breath I take today. All I have to do is wake up, ask for help guidance and knowledge to a power greater than myself, and trust that I will know what to do. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 23
Cherish Joy
Choose joy. Then cherish and savor it.
Joy is not a fleeting emotion based on outward sircumstances, a transitory feeling of the moment, a reaction to the scenery around you. It comes from within your heart like a waterfall that rushes out the side of a mountain. Joy is a runoff from the wellspring within you. And sometimes it is a delightful, surprising contrast to the scenery around you.
Embrace joy. Relish it. Even if those around you don’t have it right now, you can feel your joy. You don’t have to be disrespectful of their feelings, nor do you have to let their lack of joy diminish yours.
You have done your work. You have chosen to open your heart. Now you have your reward
Cherish joy. It’s your treasure. You’ve found it. You’ve earned it. It’s yours.
*****
more language of letting go
Find and respect your own stride
Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old: seek what they sought.
--Basho
One of the dangers of following a hero is the temptation to emulate them too much instead of walking our own path. John quit his job and started his own company when he was twenty-four years old. Five years later he sold out for millions of dollars. We want to be like John so we try the same thing and go broke. What happened? Is the universe against us? No. We just got confused about the difference between learning from a hero and trying to walk his path. John's path may have led him to start a company; your path may also lead you on that course, just not at the same time in your life.
We can still learn much from our heroes and the people we admire. Just be aware that their path and time frame may be different from ours.
When the time comes for you to start that business, learn a new skill, enter into a relationship, or whatever you're hoping to do, the experience will be there. The experience will be ready for you when you're ready for it. Your timing may be different from everyone else's.
I know people who got married after knowing each other only two weeks and then stayed mostly happily married for more than thirty years. I know people who date each other for years and still can't decide if they're ready to commit. My friend made the transition from living in the Midwest to living in California in months. That transition took me several years.
We each have our own stride and path. And while many of our lessons are similar, each of us is unique. If we spend our time trying to emulate a person rather than an idea, we'll at best be an inferior version of our teacher and at worst will never discover our own path. Their stride will be too long or too short for us, and we won't learn the true lesson, which is to trust our inner guide.
Gautama Buddha found enlightenment while sitting under a banyan tree; Milarepa found it while living as a hermit in a Himalayan cave. Gaining enlightenment isn't an exercise in following a person; it's an exercise in following your heart.
God, help me let go of any expectations of perfection I may have of myself or others. Help me be aware of the messages you send me, then help me discern my own truth.
*****
Opening to Understanding
Willingness to Feel
We must be willing to dive deep and feel, really feel what is underneath. This is where you will be set free.
There are times when we may find ourselves struggling or even fighting with our thoughts and emotions. We may feel that something must be done in a certain way or not at all, or there may be some other situation that feels absolutely black and white. But life is not this way—it's the way we are looking at our experiences that is causing the turmoil within us. When we become aware that the struggle we are having is with ourselves, we can turn our attention to the source in order to solve the problem, but we must be being willing to look where we need to and feel emotions that may make us uncomfortable at first. Then we can choose to really open ourselves to understanding all the options we can imagine. We are likely to discover that we are resisting something based on a limited understanding, and we must then open ourselves to willingness.
When we are willing to look at all the possibilities, we also become willing to accept that there is room for more than we can imagine. We can release ourselves from the grip we had on our emotions and stop limiting ourselves. We may have been unwilling to experience feeling loss, confusion, fear, or even joy for some reason or another, but when we realize that our understanding was limited we allow space for the universe to move in our lives.
Opening ourselves to willingness may feel like we are surrendering or abandoning all that we believed. But at the same time it is an act of power and courage because it is a conscious choice we make about how to apply our personal will. Being willing is to be in a state of willing something into creation. It is at once allowing ourselves to be while also choosing to direct our energy in a focused way. It is being and doing from a place of openness, where we can work with the universe rather than resist it. It is an open hand rather than one that is clenched into a fist. When we make a step toward willingness, we open ourselves to truth, possibility, and the movement of the wise universe in and through our lives. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“One’s own self is well hidden from one’s own self,” a renowned philosopher once wrote. “of all mines of treasure, one’s own is the last to be dug up.” The Twelve Steps have enabled me to unearth my “own self,” the one that for so long was buried beneath my desperate need for approval from others. Thanks to The Program and my Higher Power, I’ve begun acquiring a true sense of self and a comfortable sense of confidence. No longer do I have to react chameleon like, changing my coloration from one moment to the next, fruitlessly trying to bee all things to all people. Do I strive, at all time, to be true to myself?
Today I Pray
I pray that I may be honest with myself, and that I will continue — with the help of God and my friends — to try to get to know the real me. May I know that I cannot suddenly be a pulled-together, totally defined, completely consistent personality; it may take a while to develop into that personality, to work out my values and my priorities. May I know now that I have a good start on being who I want to be.
Today I Will Remember
I’m getting to be who I want to be.
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One More Day
The more passionately we love life, the more intensely we experience the joy of life.
– Jurgen Moltman
While we would occasionally like to hide from the real-life drama around us, we know it’s not a healthy way to live. Instead we live the drama, love it, cry with it, and at times even hate it.
Choosing to live life on its terms brings enthusiasm and passion into our experiences. Our decisions to love life – despite the highs and lows — allows us to delight in the highs and to accept the lows as unavoidable, but momentary, setbacks. Although hiding from reality can sometimes insulate us from pain, it also blinds us to the joys of wonderment and living fully.
I choose to be enthusiastic about my life.\
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Food For Thought
Tomorrow Is Another Day
As compulsive overeaters; we can be tormented by the urge to finish everything right now, today. That was the way we used to eat, and it may still be the way we try to operate in other areas of behavior. It is possible to exchange our addiction to food for an addiction to work or perfection.
Trying to do everything today is just another example of self will run riot. We are not super people and we cannot perform miracles. It is our Higher Power who makes possible our accomplishments, and His work is done slowly and gradually. God never expects more of us than we are able to deliver. It is our own pride that entices us to tackle the impossible.
As long as we are alive, our work will not be finished. Each day we are given new tasks to do and new experiences to enjoy. What we do not complete today can be continued tomorrow, according to the will of our Higher Power.
I leave tomorrow's tasks for tomorrow.
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One Day At A Time
Pain
“People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous ...
Pain is meant to wake us up ...
You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”
Jim Morrison
I am what some might call a “pain expert.” Inside, outside, stuffed, unavoidable ~ there are so many kinds of pain. I used to think that if I were really strong, I would never let pain effect me, regardless of its source. And there were plenty of sources. I walked around with this smile on my face and this wall built around me, trying to ward off the pain.
Then one day I cracked. I lost someone very close to me. When I actually accepted that, I just broke down. There was so much pain I had been avoiding for years. At that moment I was confronted by all of it!
That was when I started to realize that I couldn’t go through life avoiding pain. It was still there and it would come back. And it would be worse. Joining this program and reading the Big Book helped me to recognize my pain and feel it. I’m now able to not fear it, but to see it for what it is: a piece of me. I grow from what I feel, including pain. Without it I wouldn’t be me.
One day at a time...
I will feel my pain and I will do what is necessary to accept it. Together we are bound by pain. Together we can see our strength.
~ Miranda G.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When, however, the perfectly logical assumption is suggested that underneath the material world and life as we see it, there is an All Powerful, Guiding, Creative Intelligence, right there our perverse streak comes to the surface and we laboriously set out to convince ourselves it isn't so. we read wordy books and indulge in windy arguments, thinking we believe this universe needs no God to explain it. Were our contentions true, it would follow that life originated out of nothing, means nothing, and proceeds nowhere. - Pg. 49 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
If there is someone weaker than you, be kind to them. If there is someone stronger than you, be kind to yourself.
God, as You have meaning to me, show me the strength of kindness in what I do this hour.
A Healthy Heart
Today, I will pray for help in forgiveness. My prayers have power in unseen realms. Research has borne out over and over again that prayer can be as effective a healer as medication at times. I will rely on the deep truth of the power of the unseen; invisible hands will guide my prayer. There is a peace within me that surpasses all understanding. Today, I will cultivate that peace by taking time to go within. The world within me is as real as anything I see. It sustains and nurtures me. It is of more value to me than I can imagine. I need this part of me to be alive and well. I need a healthy heart.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The possibilities in this world are endless and abundant even when they appear impossible. Watch a tiny bird lift itself into the air by flapping fragile wings. See a pollywog transform into a frog, a seedling into an oak. Many wonders exist in God's world and you are one of them.
My Higher Power does the impossible, after I've done what is possible.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Work the Steps. You may still have living problems but you will no longer have problems living.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
God is guiding me with every step and every breath I take today. All I have to do is wake up, ask for help guidance and knowledge to a power greater than myself, and trust that I will know what to do.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The bridges you cross before you come to them are over rivers which aren't there. - Gene Brown.
bluidkiti
10-17-2021, 06:24 AM
October 24
Daily Reflections
"BY FAITH AND BY WORKS"
On anvils of experience, the structure of our Society was hammered out. . . . Thus has
it been with A.A. By faith and by works we have been able to build upon the lessons
of an incredible experience. They live today in the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics
Anonymous, which - God willing - shall sustain us in unity for so long as He may need us.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 131
God has allowed me the right to be wrong in order for our Fellowship to exist as it does
today. If I place God's will first in my life, it is very likely that A.A. as I know it today will
remain as it is.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I have turned to a Power greater than myself. Thank God, I am no longer at the
center of the universe. All the world does not revolve around me any longer. I am
only one among many. I have a Father in Heaven and I am only one of His children
and a small one at that. But I can depend on Him to show me what to do and to give me
the strength to do it. I am on the Way and the whole power of the universe is behind
me when I do the right thing. I do not have to depend entirely on myself any longer. With
God, I can face anything. Is my life in the hands of God?
Meditation For The Day
The grace of God is an assurance against all evil. It holds out security to the believing
soul. The grace of God means safety in the midst of evil. You can be kept unspotted
by the world through the power of His grace. You can have a new life of power. But
only in close contact with the grace of God is its power realized. In order to realize it
and benefit from it, you must have daily quiet communion with God, so that the
power of His grace will come unhindered into your soul.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be kept from evil by the grace of God. I pray that henceforth I will try to
keep myself more unspotted by the world.
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As Bill Sees It
Praying Rightly, p.295
We thought we had been deeply serious about religious practices.
However, upon honest appraisal we found that we had been most
superficial. Or sometimes, going to extremes, we had wallowed in
emotionalism and had also mistaken this for true religious feeling.
In both cases, we had been asking something for nothing.
We had not prayed rightly. We had always said, "Grant me my
wishes," instead of "Thy will be done." The love of God and man
we understood not at all. Therefore, we remained self-deceived,
and so incapable of receiving enough grace to restore us to sanity.
12 & 12, p. 32
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Walk In Dry Places
Light for Dark corners
Honesty
Newspaper writers know that there's usually a future story in the "dark side" of any person who is being lavishly praised in the media. That's because almost every person has a "dark side" or secrets that are carefully guarded.
We should look for such dark corners in our own lives. Most of us are not public figures fearing exposure, but recovering people seeking to stay sober and healthy.
We can begin to illuminate our dark corners by discussing our secrets with others. This does not necessarily eliminate whatever shortcoming is involved, but our honesty is a step in the right direction.
False pride may also play a part in keeping dark secrets from others, causing fear that others might see us as we really are. Thus, learning to confront and confess our dark sides can lead to victory over both fear and pride.
I'll strive today to be honest about any weaknesses or wrongs that I've been concealing. Under the light of such honesty, my dark secrets can be transformed
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Keep It Simple
Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them all.---Oliver Wendell Homes
Lying, above anything else, brings us close to getting crazy again. Lying is what addicts do.
In our addiction, our whole life was a lie.
Lying creates danger because it creates secrets. Secrets keep us from others. To stay sober, we need to stay close to people. We can't make it on our own.
Lying creates danger because it creates shame. A lie, like a drink, may make us feel good for the moment. But in the long run, it creates shame.
Do we still lie to deal with the world? Lies are like drinks---one leads to another.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to live today free of lies.
Action for the Day: For the next twenty-four hours, I will tell no lies. If I do I’ll go back and do Step Ten. I will remember that lies can lead to relapse.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The universal human yearning [is] for something permanent, enduring, without shadow of change. --Willa Cather
The specter of change builds dread in most of us. We fear the effects on our personal lives. We lack faith that the impending change will benefit us. Only time can assure us of that. And it will, just as every change we've survived up to now has done.
Changes are gifts, really. They come as hallmarks to our present attainments. They signify successful growth. How we struggle to understand this, and how quickly we forget it once we have adapted to the change. The struggle is then repeated the next time change visits us.
We long for permanence, believing it guarantees security, not realizing the only real security available to us comes with our trust in God, from whom all change comes as a blessing on the growth we've attained. If we were to experience total lack of change, we'd find death. Life is challenge, continued change, always endurable and growth-enhancing. We can reflect on what's gone before, and trust that which faces us now.
Change means I am progressing, on course.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
All this time our friend of the hotel lobby incident remained in that town. He was there three months. He now returned home, leaving behind his first acquaintances, the lawyer and the devil-may-care chap. These men had found something brand new in life. Though they knew they must help other alcoholics if they would remain sober, that motive became secondary. It was transcended by the happiness they found in giving themselves for others. They shared their homes, their slender resources, and gladly devoted their spare hours to fellow-sufferers. They were willing, by day or night, to place a new man in the hospital and visit him afterward. They grew in numbers. They experienced a few distressing failures, but in those cases they made an effort to bring the man’s family into a spiritual way of living, thus relieving much worry and suffering.
p. 159
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
I arrived late on a Friday and managed not to drink that night. The next morning at the show, I was offered the gift that changed my life. Our Hawaiian sales rep seemed frustrated; I thought he was disappointed that he hadn't managed to write an order for a couple he had just finished working with. I went over to console him. He said, no, his mood had nothing to do with the couple; instead, he explained that just this week he had lost his girlfriend, dropped out of school, lost his apartment, and also lost his full-time job. He added, "I'm an alcoholic. I've been sober for a year and a half, except I just drank again this past week. I'm a mess about it."
At that very instant, I heard one word in my head. The word was "now." I knew it meant, "Say something now!"
p. 325
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Now let's ponder the need for a list of the more glaring personality defects all of us have in varying degrees. To those having religious training, such a list would set forth serious violations of moral principles. Some others will think of this list as defects of character. Still others will call it an index of maladjustments. Some will become quite annoyed if there is talk about immorality, let alone sin. But all who are in the least reasonable will agree upon one point: that there is plenty wrong with us alcoholics about which plenty will have to be done if we are to expect sobriety, progress, and any real ability to cope with life.
p. 48
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"Every moment is an opportunity for those who are ready to seize it."
--unknown
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an
honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a
life around.
--Leo Buscaglia
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.
--Robert Louis Stevenson
It is easy to sit up and take notice. What is difficult is getting up and taking action.
--Al Batt
Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with. Ever since then man's
success or failure has been dependent on the one he used most.
--George R. Kirkpatrick
"Worry drives us to prayer and prayer drives away the worry."
--Eliz McJunkin
A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
Contentment comes from making the most of what you have and going
with it.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CYNICS
"A cynic is a man who, when he
smells flowers, looks around for
a coffin."
-- H. L. Mencken
There was a time when I always felt that life was out to get me. I always looked on the
"black" side of life. I was forever being negative and pessimistic I would always be
surrounded by sick and destructive human beings. Whenever people offered hope or
tried to help me, I turned away and rejected them. For years I created the pain
and misery in my life.
Then a close friend forced himself into my life and gave me a dose of "tough love". He
made me see that I was wallowing in self-pity. He cared enough to intervene and tell
me what I did not want to hear.
Today I have some years of recovery from alcoholism and I carry the message.
I pray that I may always love myself and others enough to take a risk.
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"For we walk by faith, not by sight."
2 Corinthians 5:7
The LORD is righteous in everything he does; he is filled with kindness.
The LORD is close to all who call on him, yes, to all who call on him sincerely. He fulfills
the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cries for help and rescues them. The
LORD protects all those who love him, but he destroys the wicked. I will praise the
LORD, and everyone on earth will bless his holy name forever and forever.
Psalm 145:17-21
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
1 John 3:18
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Daily Inspiration
Do not be discouraged if it seems that there is no response to your prayers at this time. God always responds. Lord, Your wisdom always responds to my needs with unceasing peace and love and when I listen and give thanks I am blessed with results that bring goodness to me in better ways than I expect.
Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need.
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NA Just For Today
Responsibility
"We are not responsible for our disease, only for our recovery. As we begin to apply what we have learned, our lives begin to change for the better."
Basic Text, p.88
The further we go in recovery, the less we avoid responsibility for ourselves and our actions. By applying the principles of the Narcotics Anonymous program, we are able to change our lives. Our existence takes on new meaning as we accept responsibility and the freedom of choice responsibility implies. We do not take recovery for granted.
We take responsibility for our recovery by working the Twelve Steps with a sponsor. We go to meetings regularly and share with the newcomer what was freely given to us: the gift of recovery. We become involved with our home group and accept responsibility for our part in sharing recovery with the still-suffering addict. As we learn how to effectively practice spiritual principles in all areas of our lives, the quality of our lives improves.
Just for today: Using the spiritual tools I've gained in recovery, I am willing and able to make responsible choices.
pg. 310
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Before he closed his eyes, he let them wander around his old room. . .familiar and friendly things. . .which were so glad to see him again and could always be counted on for the same simple welcome. --Kenneth Grahame
When they moved into the house, the room at the top of the stairs was just a junk room. As the years passed, they slowly transformed the room into a guest room.
When they decided they needed another voice in the house, they transformed the room again; out went the fold-out couch, in came a crib and rocking chair; off went the art gallery prints from the walls, up went Winnie the Pooh. t was no longer a guest room, but a place for the baby, a new --- and permanent --- member of the family.
We always have room for more in our lives. When we are ready for it, what we need for growth will emerge.
What do the rooms inside our homes and ourselves have to tell us about the way we live our lives?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Becoming nothing before God, learn to keep silent; in this silence is the beginning, which is first to seek God's kingdom.
--Soren Kierkegaard
So many devastating things can bring us to our knees. With experience we learn that pain and trouble are part of life. Most of us have fought against everyday realities as if they were our personal enemies. We accepted every challenge, thinking we had to be winners every time. Today we may feel broken by the loss of a love, by a disappointing job experience, or by our powerlessness over a loved one.
In our brokenness we find our true humanity. It is the beginning of our spiritual awakening. As men we thought surrender was a word for losers and weaklings. Living this program teaches us that accepting our brokenness opens us to a new kind of wholeness. After we acknowledge we are not in control of every event in our lives, and after admitting our addiction and codependency have controlled us, we come alive inside with the rich new experience of being a person.
God help me today to learn the spiritual lesson contained in my frustrations and grief.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The universal human yearning [is] for something permanent, enduring, without shadow of change. --Willa Cather
The specter of change builds dread in most of us. We fear the effects on our personal lives. We lack faith that the impending change will benefit us. Only time can assure us of that. And it will, just as every change we've survived up to now has done.
Changes are gifts, really. They come as hallmarks to our present attainments. They signify successful growth. How we struggle to understand this, and how quickly we forget it once we have adapted to the change. The struggle is then repeated the next time change visits us.
We long for permanence, believing it guarantees security, not realizing the only real security available to us comes with our trust in God, from whom all change comes as a blessing on the growth we've attained. If we were to experience total lack of change, we'd find death. Life is challenge, continued change, always endurable and growth-enhancing. We can reflect on what's gone before, and trust that which faces us now.
Change means I am progressing, on course.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Opening ourselves to love.
Open ourselves to the love that is available to us.
We do not have to limit our sources of love. God and the Universe have an unlimited supply of what we need, including love.
When we are open to receiving love, we will begin to receive it. It may come from the most surprising places, including from within ourselves.
We will be open to and aware of the love that is and has been there for us all along. We will feel and appreciate the love from friends. We will notice and enjoy the love that comes to us from family.
We will be ready to receive love in our special love relationships too. We do not have to accept love from unsafe people -- people who will exploit us or with whom we don't want to have relationships.
But there is plenty of good love available -- love that heals our heart, meets our needs, and makes our spirit sing.
We have denied ourselves too long. We have been martyrs too long. We have given so much and allowed ourselves to receive too little. We have paid our dues. It is time to continue the chain of giving and receiving by allowing ourselves to receive.
Today' I will open myself to the love that is coming to me from the Universe. I will accept it and enjoy it when it comes.
Today I find healthy ways to express my anger and resentments so that I can be free of them. Today I empty myself of all anger and resentments so that I can let love come into my heart. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 24
Share Your Heart with the World
Share your heart with the world. Share willingly, openly, joyfully what you have seen, what you have learned.
Don’t tell people how you think you should have handled things. That’s shame. It teaches others to feel ashamed,too. Don’t tell people how you wish you had handled things. That’s needless regret that we pass on to others.
Share honestly and openly about yourself, the way you felt, the things you thought. Share how going through your experience changed you. Talk about your resistance, your pain, the imperfect way you did things, the way you handle things now.
Sharing honestly and openly teaches people aroud us the most helpful truth– that the imperfect way we live our lives is right for us at the time. When we love and accept ourselves enough to honestly share who we are, it helps those we touch to believe that they’re good anough,too.
Share your heart with the world and you will bring healing to those you touch.
*****
more language of letting go
What you see isn't always what you get
I was walking through the mall when I saw a photo booth at one of the kiosks. A large green screen hung as a backdrop and the photographer had her subjects stand in front of it in various poses. After taking the photo, she used a computer to paste it into a scene. You might then look like an alligator wrestler, a snowboarder, a hapless adventurer getting run over by his jeep.
What you see is not always what you get. People are not always what they seem. It's easy for others to paint an inaccurate picture either to impress or manipulate us into doing what they want us to do. Understand that while many, even most, of the people in your life will be honest, there will be those who will paint a false picture. They will claim to have experiemce that you don't; they will claim to know the secret of how to live your life; they will claim to be something they're not. They will try to use their self-exalted position to control and manipulate you.
Be aware of people who would manipulate you by pasting themselves into a false background or scene. Don't just take things at face value. Take your time, as much time as you need, to see what the real background is.
Most of us get misled from time to time. Sometimes people con us. Other times we trick ourselves. Let go of naivete.
God, if I start getting conned or manipulated, please show me and help me see the truth.
*****
Avoiding the Center
Hovering Around the Sun by Madisyn Taylor
Quiet time each day is so important, but many are so out of practice that it’s almost unnerving to be in stillness.
It’s funny to imagine our lives as something we spend a lot of time avoiding, because it seems like that would be impossible to do. Our lives consist of everything we engage in, from showering to sleeping, but also a lot of busy work that distracts us and keeps us from looking at our lives. Experiencing our life from the inside means taking time each day to simply be alone and quiet in the presence of our soul. Many of us are so out of practice that it’s almost unnerving to have a moment to ourselves. As a result, we may have stopped trying to carve out that time to take a seat at the center of our lives.
One of the reasons it can be uncomfortable to sit with ourselves is because when we do, we tend to open ourselves to an inner voice, which might question the way we’re living or some of the choices we’re making. Sometimes the voice reminds us of our secret, inner yearnings, dreams we thought we had forgotten. When we already feel overwhelmed by our busy schedules, the idea of hearing this voice can be exhausting. However, its reflections are the chords that connect us to our authentic selves, and they are the very things that make our lives worth living. When we continually avoid connecting with our life, we risk losing out on the very purpose of our existence.
To begin the process of being more present and less absent in your life, you might want to set aside just a few minutes each day to simply sit with yourself. This doesn't mean watching a movie or reading a book, but taking time each day for self-examination to avoid the avoidance, to be with yourself in an open way. After a while, you may start to enjoy this part of the day so much that you make less busy work for yourself, so that you can spend more time at the center of your own life, rather than hovering like a planet around the sun.
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
So many of us in The Program went through childhood — as well as part of our adult lives — emotionally shackled with the terrible burden called shyness. We found it difficult to walk into crowded rooms, to converse with even our friends, to make eye contact with anyone. The agonies we suffered! We learn in The Program that shyness is just another manifestation of self-centered fear, which is the root of all our character defects. Shyness, specifically, is fear of what others think or might think about us. To our enormous relief, our shyness gradually leaves us as we work The Program and interact with others. Am I aware that I’m okay as long as I don’t concentrate on me?
Today I Pray
God, may I be grateful that I am getting over my shyness, after years of pulling back from people, squirming, blushing, blurting out all the “wrong things” or blurting out all the sayings nothing at all — then reliving the agonies and imagining what I should have said and done. May I know that it has taken a full-blown addiction and a lot of caring people to convince me that I’m Okay — and you’re Okay, he’s Okay, and so is she.
Today I Will Remember
A cure for shyness is caring about someone else.
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One More Day
We conceal it from oursleves in vain — we must always hav esomething.
–Blaise Pascal
Not knowing how to love may imperil our very existence. Although love doesn’t literally nourish our bodies, not being able to love strips us of our humanness.
Romantic love is only one part of our capacity to love, for there is also the ability to love our friends, family, and our fellow human beings. The ripple effect of our well-being will spread, both within us and from us, and we will begin to nourish our souls as well.
We also learn to love ourselves — all that we are. Self-love enhances our self-image. A strong sense of esteem enhances our entire lives.
I need to love and be loved. It is essential to my psychic well-being that I understand the importance of loving.
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Food For Thought
Accepting God's Will
Disappointments and hurts can send us into an orgy of self-pity if we are not willing to accept them as part of our Higher Power's plan. We do not understand why we must suffer disappointments and frustrations, but trusting God means that we accept our share of this world's pain.
When we look back on former disappointments, we are often able to see that what we so desperately wanted at the time would not have been the best thing for us. Our vision and judgment are limited. Faith that God is managing our lives according to His purposes can relieve us of unnecessary hurt and frustration.
To accept God's will is not to passively absorb all that happens to us like an inert sponge. It is to actively seek knowledge of His plan for our lives and to purposefully work according to the knowledge we receive. Acceptance is positive and cooperative.
Your will is what I seek to accept.
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One Day At A Time
FEAR
“Fear is not created by the world around us,
but in the mind, by what we think is going to happen.”
Elizabeth Gawain
There are different kinds of fear. Certain fears are good, because they help preserve our lives. Babies, for example, have a fear of falling. It just seems to be a natural instinct. Any fear that protects us from harming ourselves is a good fear.
However, when fear becomes an obsession, it is getting out of hand. Why do we go looking for trouble? There is a saying, “Don’t let clouds of fear of the morrow hide today’s sunshine.” We can get so anxious about what’s going to happen in the future that we don’t enjoy living today.
Life is a precious gift to be lived one day at a time, and is to be shared with others.
One Day at a Time . . .
This is how I will live my life: One day at a time, one moment at a time, sharing my precious gift with another through Twelve Step giving.
Lizzie
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
In this book you read again and again that faith did for us what we could not do for ourselves. We hope you are convinced now that God can remove whatever self-will has blocked you off from Him. If you have already made a decision, and an inventory of your grosser handicaps, you have made a good beginning. That being so you have swallowed and digested some big chunks of truth about yourself. - Pgs. 70-71 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
One of the things you will notice about our fellowship is that we hug a lot. Often this makes newcomers uncomfortable because they are not used to being given love and attention without serious strings attached. There are no strings, we just simply love you.
Give me the courage to hug the next clean and sober person I see.
Entering the Darkness
Today, I will allow myself to enter into the dark and searing painful experiences of my past, and cry it all out. If I can bring emotional literacy and forgiveness into the 'occupied territory' of my inner world, I can give myself the freedom I desire. I have a world within me that is deep and peaceful. The grief that I carry hidden in silence has great feelings in the present, and I release them. There is no longer any safety for me in hiding. My security comes from full awareness and acceptance of who I am. Until I understand my grief and allow myself to know it, I will not be free of its grip.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You cannot go back and make new choices or change the outcome of the past. But you can face the demons of your past and change your destiny.
Not everything I face can be changed, but nothing can be changed until I face it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If anyone speaks badly of you, live so no one will believe it.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I find healthy ways to express my anger and resentments so that I can be free of them. Today I empty myself of all anger and resentments so that I can love come into my heart.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Until I make peace with what I am I'll never be content with what I have. - Burt S.
bluidkiti
10-17-2021, 06:25 AM
October 25
Daily Reflections
A.A.'s HEARTBEAT
Without unity, the heart of A.A. would cease to beat; . . . .
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 125
Without unity I would be unable to recover in A.A. on a daily basis. By practicing unity
within my group, with other A.A. members and at all levels of this great Fellowship, I
receive a pronounced feeling of knowing that I am a part of a miracle that was divinely
inspired. The ability of Bill W. and Dr. Bob, working together and passing it on to other
members, tells me that to give it away is to keep it. Unity is oneness and yet the whole
Fellowship is for all of us.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Fifth, I have learned to live one day at a time. I have finally realized the great fact that all
I have is now. This sweeps away all vain regret and it makes my thoughts of the future
free of fear. Now is mine. I can do what I want with it. I own it, for better or worse. What I
do now, in this present moment, is what makes up my life. My whole life is only a
succession of nows. I will take this moment, which has been given to me by the grace of
God, and I will do something with it. What I do with each now, will make me or break me.
Am I living in the now?
Meditation For The Day
We should work at overcoming ourselves, our selfish desires and our self-centeredness.
This can never be fully accomplished. We can never become entirely unselfish. But we
can come to realize that we are not at the center of the universe and that everything does
not revolve around us at the center. I am only one cell in a vast network of human cells. I
can at least make the effort to conquer the self-life and seek daily to obtain more and
more of this self-conquest. "He that overcomes himself is greater than he who conquers a
city."
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may strive to overcome my selfishness. I pray that I may achieve the right
perspective of my position in the world.
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As Bill Sees It
Daily Inventory, p. 296
Often, as we review each day, only the closest scrutiny will reveal
what our true motives were. There are cases where our ancient
enemy rationalization has stepped in and has justified conduct which
was really wrong. The temptation here is to imagine that we had
good motives and reasons when we really hadn't.
We "constructively criticized" someone who needed it, when our
real motive was to win a useless argument. Or, the person concerned
not being present, we thought we were helping others to
understand him, when in actuality our true motive was to feel
superior by pulling him down.
We hurt those we loved because they needed to be "taught a
lesson," but we really wanted to punish. We were depressed and
complained we felt bad, when in fact we were mainly asking for
sympathy and attention.
12 & 12, p. 94
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Walk In Dry Places
Different routes to alcoholism
Understanding powerlessness
While alcoholics have much in common, the personal stories heard at AA open meetings show that we took different routes to alcoholism. Some became out-of-control drinkers almost from the beginning. Others lost control slowly after years of seemingly moderate drinking.
These differences are underscored by the fact that we also differ in physical and emotional traits. Some alcoholics, for example, were so emotionally disturbed that they became problem drinkers from the very start. Some appeared to "have it all together," yet became alcoholics after retirement or some other change in life patterns.
Whatever the route taken, we share in common our individual powerlessness at the time we knocked on AA's door. And the solution for each of us was the same: sobriety in AA.
The risk in listening to such different personal accounts is that some of us twist these differences into "proof" that we are not alcoholics. The reward of such sharing , however, is learning that we do have a common problem and that there is a solution that fits everyone, in spite of our diffences.
I'll remember today that I came to AA because I was powerless over alcohol. That has not changed.
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Keep It Simple
Love thy neighbor as thyself, but choose your neighbor.---Louise Beal
In our program, we learn a lot about loving ourselves. Then we start to see how this helps us love our neighbors. We learn to love ourselves honestly, seeing our strengths and our weaknesses. We learn to see others honestly . We learn how much to trust ourselves and when to get extra help. We learn how much to trust others too. We learn to love ourselves with a love that’s honest and challenging. We learn to love others this way too. We learn to care about others without losing our common sense. We learn to protect our spirits from harm.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me see others clearly. Help me love them. But help me choose carefully who I trust.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll list three people I trust the most, and I’ll write down why.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Love has the quality of informing almost everything--even one's work. --Sylvia Ashton-Warner
We are changed through loving and being loved. Our attitudes are profoundly and positively affected by the presence of love in our lives. Each time we offer a loving response to a friend, co-worker, even a stranger, we powerfully influence the dynamics of the interaction between us.
Every response we make to someone changes us while it informs him or her. When we treat others with disdain, we invite the same. When we express only criticism of others, our self-assessment is equally negative. The beauty of a loving posture is that it calls forth love in response. The more love we give away, the more we receive.
Any task before us is lessened when we carry love in our hearts. Love is more powerful than fear. Love helps to open the channel to God, assuring us of the strength, the understanding, and the patience needed to complete any assignment confronting us.
God loves me, unconditionally. And I will experience the reality of that love the more I give it away. Love wants to change me--and it can.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
A year and six months later these three had succeeded with seven more. Seeing much of each other, scarce an evening passed that someone’s home did not shelter a little gathering of men and women, happy in their release, and constantly thinking how they might present their discovery to some newcomer. In addition to these casual get-togethers, it became customary to set apart one night a week for a meeting to be attended by anyone or everyone interested in a spiritual way of life. Aside from fellowship and sociability, the prime object was to provide a time and place where new people might bring their problems.
pp. 159-160
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
To my amazement I spoke the words, "Mike, I think I'm one too." Mike's mood changed instantly. I recognize now it was hope. We started talking. Among other things, I told him I hadn't had a drink for about a month but didn't go to A.A. When he asked why I had avoided A.A., I told him it was because I didn't think I had hit bottom. Somehow he didn't laugh but said, "You hit bottom when you stop digging." He took me to my first three A.A. meetings.
p. 325
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
To avoid falling into confusion over the names these defects should be called, let's take a universally recognized list of major human failings--the Seven Deadly Sins of pride, greed, lust, anger, gluttony, envy, and sloth. It is not by accident that pride heads the procession. For pride, leading to self-justification, and always spurred by conscious or unconscious fears, is the basic breeder of most human difficulties, the chief block to true progress. Pride lures us into making demands upon ourselves or upon others which cannot be met without perverting or misusing our God-given instincts. When the satisfaction of our instincts for sex, security, and society becomes the sole object of our lives,
then pride steps in to justify our excesses.
pp. 48-49
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"Be the change you want to see in the world."
--Mohandas Ghandi
Who has never tasted what is bitter does not know what is sweet.
--German Proverb
It doesn't take a lot of effort to know the needs of another person. By helping others you
are helping yourself.
--unknown
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
--Abraham Lincoln
In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
--unknown
Learn to enjoy little things; there are so many of them!
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FLEXIBILITY
"Better bend than break."
-- Scottish Proverb
Dis-ease: to be controlling, stiff, uncomfortable and unbending.
Sobriety: being relaxed, comfortable and flexible in my personal life and my interaction
with others.
Life: not a race but an experience; it is not an exercise but an adventure.
Before I accepted my alcoholism, I went through periods of "dryness" --- when I was
rigid, stiff and unbending. It was awful! Everything became a test, a job, a
premeditated act behind a mask of cheerfulness. I was angry, resentful and in pain. My
problem was that I stopped drinking to please other people, rather than accept the
true nature of my disease. Dryness is controlled denial.
Today the sobriety I have gained from an acceptance of self has overflowed into an
acceptance of life on life's terms --- and I am happy.
Let the wind of experience continue to bend me in the knowledge of Your love.
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"From the rising of the sun to its going down the Lord's name is to be praised."
Psalms 113:3
So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things
grow. The man who plants and the man who waters have one purpose, and each will be
rewarded according to his own labor. For we are God's fellow workers; you are God's
field, God's building.
1 Corinthians 3:7-9
"Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight
yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart."
Psalm 37:3-4
The LORD opens the eyes of the blind. The LORD lifts the burdens of those bent
beneath their loads. The LORD loves the righteous. The LORD protects the foreigners
among us. He cares for the orphans and widows, but he frustrates the plans of the wicked. The
LORD will reign forever.
Psalm 146:8-10
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Daily Inspiration
Treat your family as you would treat a best friend. Lord, help me to treasure my family with all of their imperfections as well as my own and cherish the time we have together.
There is no real happiness without God and no peace when we separate ourselves from Him. Lord, You said, "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you". I give you my troubled heart.
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NA Just For Today
Principles Before Personalities
"Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities."
Twelfth Tradition
"Principles before personalities." Many of us chant these words along with the reader whenever the Twelve Traditions are read. The fact that these words have become a cliche of sorts doesn't make them any less important, either in service or in our lives. These words are an affirmation: "We listen to our conscience and do what's right, no matter who's involved." And that principle serves as one of the cornerstones of recovery as well as our traditions.
What does "principles before personalities" really mean? It means we practice honesty, humility, compassion, tolerance, and patience with everyone, whether we like them or not. Putting principles before personalities teaches us to treat everyone equally. The Twelfth Step asks us to apply principles in all our affairs; the Twelfth Tradition suggests we apply them to our relations with everyone.
Practicing principles doesn't stop with our friends or when we leave a meeting. It's for every day, for everyone… in all areas of our lives.
Just for today: I will listen to my conscience and do what's right. My focus will be on principles, not on people's personalities.
pg. 311
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I love him and I cannot seem to find him. --Ovid
Where can we find the ones we love? Do they always live in our world, or do we have to go out of our way? They often are not at home; we can find them at their work. Their play is different from ours; we could try having their kind of fun.
Too often, we look only for friends who are much like ourselves, and we tend to avoid those who are not. This kind of narrow-mindedness isn't fair to others or ourselves. We are each unique, like the pieces of a puzzle. We are each necessary to the whole picture.
When we go out of our way to know someone else better, we stretch our own boundaries; we give ourselves new space in which to grow.
What part of my life can I discover in someone new today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The wild geese do not intend to cast their reflection; the water has no mind to receive their image. --Zenrin poem
There are moments which simply happen through no conscious intention or will on anyone's part. The image of an old woman with a peaceful face, the smell of smoke rising from a chimney on a chilly night, the knowing look of recognition from a friend as we make a comment, the special feeling of a touch. These are spiritual moments because they reach a deeper part of our being. They are like a sliver in time set aside which nourishes our souls and adds serenity to our lives.
We grow when we learn to notice these kinds of moments. In our willfulness, we have often missed them before because we simply were not open to anything we weren't already looking for. This world is so much larger than the human mind. In recovery, we can take time to admire the beauty reflected around us.
Today, I will let the rest of life intrude upon my mind. I will let myself be nourished by what comes along.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Love has the quality of informing almost everything--even one's work. --Sylvia Ashton-Warner
We are changed through loving and being loved. Our attitudes are profoundly and positively affected by the presence of love in our lives. Each time we offer a loving response to a friend, co-worker, even a stranger, we powerfully influence the dynamics of the interaction between us.
Every response we make to someone changes us while it informs him or her. When we treat others with disdain, we invite the same. When we express only criticism of others, our self-assessment is equally negative. The beauty of a loving posture is that it calls forth love in response. The more love we give away, the more we receive.
Any task before us is lessened when we carry love in our hearts. Love is more powerful than fear. Love helps to open the channel to God, assuring us of the strength, the understanding, and the patience needed to complete any assignment confronting us.
God loves me, unconditionally. And I will experience the reality of that love the more I give it away. Love wants to change me--and it can.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of the Past
... in thy book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me when as yet there was none of them. --Ps. 139:16
Some people believe that each of our days were planned, Divinely Ordered, before we were born. God knew, they say, and planned exactly what was to transpire.
Others suggest we chose, we participated in planning our life - the events, the people, the circumstances that were to take place, in order to work through our issues and learn the lessons we needed to master.
Whatever our philosophy, our interpretation can be similar: Our past is neither an accident nor a mistake. We have been where we needed to be, with the necessary people. We can embrace our history, with its pain, its imperfections, and its mistakes, even its tragedies. It is uniquely ours; it was intended just for us.
Today, we are right where we need to be. Our present circumstances are exactly as they need to be - for now.
Today, I will let go of my guilt and fear about my past and present circumstances. I will trust that where I have been and where I am now are right for me.
No matter how busy I think I am, I will share a part of me with someone else today. I am discovering the joy of giving and I will take the time to stop and share a part of me. I am learning to trust the positive and loving people. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 25
Replenish Yourself
Some of us don’t know how tired we are until we try to relax. Then we realize we’re exhausted.
We may have lived with exhaustion and stress so long it’s become habitual. That doesn’t mean we’re bad or wrong, or even off track. Many of us are deeply involved in activities, work, projects, and relationships we enjoy. We like our lives and the things we’re doing. But sometimes we’ve pushed too hard or too long. Sometimes we haven’t given our bodies adequate time to relax, to rest, to really let go.
It’s all right to take time out. Relax. Refresh. Regroup. It’s all right to rest even if we’re busy, rest often enough to keep ourselves replenished. Get in touch with your body, then stay in touch with yourself.
Find out how tired you are. Then let your body tell you what it needs to come back to life and love.
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more language of letting go
Stop tricking yourself
Even the best of us get tricked from time to time. Someone comes along and impresses us with magic. Later we discover it wasn't magic, just illusions.
Sometimes the issue isn't that people were trying to trick us. We tricked ourselves. We saw what we wanted to see, regardless of what reality was. Then, when reality started to creep in, we told ourselves if we held our breath and didn't feel our feelings and hoped long and hard enough, reality would change.
We don't have to get mad at ourselves when we get tricked, even if we've fooled ourselves. We need to see and acknowledge the truth and become aware of what reality is.
Don't let our embarrassment over finding yourself in a bad situation cloud your view of yourself. Sometimes all we need to do is acknowledge the truth, including the truth about how we feel. In a few days or a few months, the solution will become clear.
When all the illusions drop away, that's when real magic begins. You'll be guided along your path.
God, help me remember that when I admit and accept the truth, I'll be given the power and guidance to change.
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Big Steps On Life's Path
Being Aware is the First Step by Madisyn Taylor
There is freedom that comes with awareness, because with it comes the opportunity to make a choice.
Life is a journey comprised of many steps on our personal path that takes us down a winding road of constant evolution. And each day, we are provided with a myriad of opportunities that can allow us to transform into our next best selves. One moment we are presented with an opportunity to react differently when yet another someone in our life rubs us the wrong way; on another day we may find ourselves wanting to walk away from a particular circumstance but are not sure if we can. Eventually, we may find ourselves stuck in a rut that we can never seem to get out of. We may even make the same choices over and over again because we don’t know how to choose otherwise. Rather than moving us forward, our personal paths may take us in a seemingly never-ending circle where our actions and choices lead us nowhere but to where we’ve already been. It is during these moments that awareness can be the first step to change.
Awareness is when we are able to realize what we are doing. We observe ourselves, noticing our reactions, actions, and choices as if we were a detached viewer. Awareness is the first step to change because we can’t make a change unless we are aware that one needs to be made in the first place. We can then begin understanding why we are doing what we are doing. Afterward, it becomes difficult not to change because we are no longer asleep to the truth behind our behaviors. We also begin to realize that, just as much as we are the root source behind the causes for our behaviors, we are also the originator for any changes that we want to happen.
There is a freedom that comes with awareness. Rather than thinking that we are stuck in a repetitive cycle where there is no escape, we begin to see that we very much play a hand in creating our lives. Whether we are aware of them or not, our behaviors and choices are always ours to make. Our past and our present no longer have to dictate our future when we choose to be aware. We are then free to move beyond our old limits, make new choices, and take new actions. With awareness, our paths can’t help but wind us forward in our lives while paving the way for new experiences and new ways of being. It is through awareness that we can continue to consciously evolve. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
My addictions were like thieves in more ways than I can count. They robbed me not only of money, property and other material things, but of dignity and self-respect, while my family and friends suffered right along with me. My addictions also robbed me of the ability to treat myself properly, as God would treat me. Today, in total contrast, I’m capable of true love of self — to the extent that I’m able to provide myself with more love than even I need. So I give that love away to other people in The Program, just as they have given their love to me. Do I thank God for their love to me. Do I thank God for bringing me to a Program in which sick people are loved back to health?
Today I Pray
Thanks be to God for a way of life which generates such love and caring that we in The Program can’t help but learn to love ourselves. When I see that someone cares about me, I am more apt to be convinced that perhaps I am, after all, worth caring about. May I be conscious always of the love I am now able to give — and give it.
Today I Will Remember
Someone caring about me makes me feel worth caring about.
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One More Day
The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you have left when anything happens.
–Ethel Barrymore
Now is a good time for us to pursue our interest and to nurture both new and old relationships. We understands so well how easily and quickly our circumstances can change. This understanding nudges us to expand our experience.
No one of us is immune from the troubles of life. Whether the problem is loss of a job or loss of a home, good health, or a dear friend, we all suffer at one time or another. Keeping our lives as full as possible with the love of good people and the challenge of activities provides support even when times get tough.
Tragedies and hard times will affect me, but I know I have the ability to move on.
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Food For Thought
Abstaining from Harmful Relationships
Habit sometimes locks us into relationships, which are not in our best interest. It is easy to mistake dependency for love. When we stop overeating compulsively, we can evaluate our attachments to other people with greater clarity and perception than was possible when we continually escaped into food.
Our OA friends act as sounding boards for us as we try to sort out the healthy from the unhealthy relationships in our lives. We may find that for our continued growth we need to move away from old emotional entanglements, which are hampering our progress with the program. Abstaining from a harmful relationship can be as difficult at first as abstaining from compulsive overeating! The same physical restraint is necessary to keep ourselves from following old habit patterns.
By taking Step Three, we make all of our relationships with other people subject to the will of our Higher Power. When God comes first, other loves fall into their proper places.
Show me how to love.
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One Day At A Time
Courage
“If you're going through hell, keep going.”
Winston Churchill
Recovery work takes great courage. Everyone who tells you differently has not explored themselves in great depth.
It takes great courage for many of us to get up each morning to face a day of physical challenge. Others feel the pull of emotions, job, or family issues.
If but for today, reach inside and give yourself a big hug for being willing to hang on one minute longer. That minute will turn into moments, and before you know it, you will have lived out the Program message, “One day at a time."
One day at a time...
I will honor and celebrate the courage shown in working this program.
~ January K.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The spiritual life is not a theory. WE HAVE TO LIVE IT. - Pg. 83 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Sometimes reality slaps us right in the face. We may be out of money, facing jail, losing a loved one, or hating our circumstances. However, right this hour we have only one true reality: SOBRIETY. Without sobriety all the above only gets worse!
I make contact with Divine Intelligence so that I am not preoccupied with things outside my control. I want to remember why I am here.
Prayer and Miracles
Today, I will pray for a miracle in a situation that seems too much for me to handle or understand. There are times when I just don't have what it takes to work out a situation. I'm too loaded up with fears and anxieties. What could it hurt to pray for a little divine guidance or intervention? At the very least, it will help ease my burden; and at best, it will aid in a genuine shift in perception that might truly help my situation. When I feel stuck and as if I have explored every option and am still nowhere, I will pray for a miracle.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
On the way to becoming an old-timer, there are those who glow in their growing and those who are slow in their growing. The person who glows is always able to see the larger picture and the one who doesn't stays focused in their own little world. See yourself as a small part of a magnificent whole and do not see self as the whole.
The fellowship is not my whole world but my world wouldn't be whole without it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Acknowledge your tallcomings along with your shortcomings.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
No matter how busy I think I am, I will share a part of me with someone else today. I am discovering the joy of giving and I will take the time to stop and share a part of me. I am learning to trust the positive and loving people.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I'm so grateful to be here fully clothed and in my right mind and not crawling around in a jail cell on my hands and knees like an animal. - Johnny H.
bluidkiti
10-17-2021, 06:25 AM
October 26
Daily Reflections
ONE ULTIMATE AUTHORITY
For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority—a loving God as He may
express Himself in our group conscience.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 132
When I am chosen to carry some small responsibility for my fellows, I ask that God grant
me the patience, open-mindedness, and willingness to listen to those I would lead. I must
remind myself that I am the trusted servant of others, not their "governor," "teacher,"
or "instructor." God guides my words and my actions, and my responsibility is to heed
His suggestions. Trust is my watchword, I trust others who lead. In the Fellowship of
A.A., I entrust God with the ultimate authority of "running the show."
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Sixth, I have A.A. meetings to go to, thank God. Where would I go without them?
Where would I be without them? Where would I find the sympathy, the understanding, the
fellowship, the companionship? Nowhere else in the world. I have come home. I have
found the place where I belong. I no longer wander alone over the face of the earth. I am
at peace and at rest. What a great gift has been given me by A.A.! I do not deserve it.
But it is nevertheless mine. I have a home at last. I am content. Do I thank God
everyday for the A.A. Fellowship?
Meditation For The Day
Walk all the way with another person and with God. Do not go part of the way and then
stop. Do not push God so far into the background that He has no effect on your life. Walk
all the way with Him. Make a good companion of God, by praying to Him often during the
day. Do not let your contact with Him be broken for too long a period. Work all the way
with God and with other people, along the path of life, wherever it may lead you.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may walk in companionship with God along the way. I pray that I may keep
my feet upon the path that leads upward.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
A VISION OF THE WHOLE, p. 297
"Though many of us have had to struggle for sobriety, never yet
has this Fellowship had to struggle for lost unity. Consequently,
we sometimes take this one great gift for granted. We forget that,
should we lose our unity, the millions of alcoholics who still 'do not
know' might never get their chance.
********************************
"We used to be skeptical about large A.A. gatherings like conventions,
thinking they might prove too exhibitionistic. But, on balance, their
benefit is huge. While each A.A.'s interest should center principally in
those about him and upon his own group, it is both necessary and
desirable that we all get a larger vision of the whole.
"The General Service Conference in New York also produces this
effect upon those who attend. It is a vision-stretching process."
1. Letter, 1949
2. Letter, 1956
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Who is an Alcoholic?
AA's mission
Though AA's avowed mission is to carry its message to alcoholics, the fellowship does not really have a one-size-fits-all definition of alcoholism. This has created some confusion when nonalcoholics inadvertently show up at meetings that are supposed to be for alcoholics only, or when people with other addictions seek AA's help. A few groups even insist that people must declare themselves alcoholics in order to participate in a "closed" meeting.
But who is an alcoholic? The AA pioneers were not insistent that people should immediately declare themselves alcoholics in order to receive help. Newcomers were invited to attend meetings and then decide for themselves if they were alcoholics and needed the program. In today's environment, we have the added factor that troubled people might be addicted to both drugs and alcohol. Such cross-addiction, in fact, seems to be a strong trend. We also know that any alcoholic can easily become cross-addicted if he or she uses other drugs.
Our best course is to keep the door open for any person who comes to AA sincerely desiring help. If people find their answer in AA, they probably belong in the fellowship.
I'll be grateful today that I was able to admit that I had a problem and needed AA's help. I'll accept others just as I was accepted. To stay sober and grow in the program. I do not need to define alcoholism for anybody other myself.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Nobody give you freedom. Malcolm X
We were not free. We were prisoners of our illness. What our illness wanted, we give itour dignity, our self-respect, even our families. Our prison walls were made of denial,
false pride, and self-will run riot. Now we know that brick walls don’t have to stop us. We don’t have to bang our heads on them.
Slowly, we’re learning about freedom. We’re learning that freedom. We’re learning that freedom comes from within. It comes when we think clearly and make our own choices.
It comes when we follow a better way of life. It comes when we take care of ourselves. It comes when we take responsibility. The key to freedom is in loving our Higher Power.
Do you choose freedom?
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, show me how to walk away from a wall or go around it. But teach me to stop and think when I get to a wall. Maybe it’s there for my safety.
Today’s Action: Today I’ll think about all the freedom I have given myself by living a sober way of life.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue, an everlasting vision of the ever-changing view. --Carole King
Every event of our lives is contributing a rich thread to our personal tapestry. Each of us is weaving one unique to ourselves, but all of our tapestries are complementary. We need others' rich designs in order to create our own.
We seldom have the foresight to understand the worth, the ultimate value of a particular circumstance at its beginning. But hindsight offers us clarity. It's good to reflect on the many circumstances that failed to thrill us; in all cases we can now see why we needed them. As our trust in God and the goodness of all experiences grows, we'll more quickly respond with gladness when situations are fresh. No experience is meant for harm. We are coming to understand that, even though on occasion we forget.
Practicing gratitude will help us more fully appreciate what has been offered us. Being grateful influences our attitude; it softens our harsh exterior and takes the threat out of most new situations.
If I greet the day, glad to be alive, I will be gladdened by all the experiences in store for me. Each is making a necessary contribution to my wholeness.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Outsiders became interested. One man and his wife placed their large home at the disposal of this strangely assorted crowd. This couple has since become so fascinated that they have dedicated their home to the word. Many a distracted wife has visited this house to find loving and understanding companionship among women who knew her problem, to hear from the lips of their husbands what had happened to them, to be advised how her own wayward mate might be hospitalized and approached when next he stumbled.
p. 160
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
It was the second meeting that clinched my resolve to pursue sobriety. There were about thirty-five people in attendance, but the space was small, so the meeting seemed very crowded. Being from out of town, I stood up and introduced myself when asked to by the chairperson. Later on in the meeting, the chairperson called on me to share. I got up and somehow walked over to the microphone and podium--I've never been so nervous in my life. But the words came out naturally as I described the events that led up to the meeting that night.
pp. 325-326
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
All these failings generate fear, a soul-sickness in its own right. Then fear, in turn, generates more character defects. Unreasonable fear that our instincts will not be satisfied drives us to covet the possessions of others, to lust for sex and power, to become angry when our instinctive demands are threatened, to be envious when the ambitions of others seem to be realized while ours are not. We eat, drink, and grab for more of everything than we need, fearing we shall never have enough. And with genuine alarm at the prospect of work, we stay lazy. We loaf and procrastinate, or at best work grudgingly and under half steam. These fears are the termites that ceaselessly devour the foundations of whatever sort of life we try to build.
p. 49
************************************************** *********
"Don't limit a child to your own learning, for he was born in another time."
--Rabbinical Saying
It's amazing how well I feel when I'm not thinking about myself.
--Bob Y
"Appreciate people. Nothing gives more joy than appreciation."
--Ruth Smeltzer
"When someone does something well, applaud! You will make two people happy."
--Samuel Goldwyn
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
--Kahlil Gibran
************************************************** *********
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
KINDNESS
"Kindness in words creates
confidence. Kindness in thinking
creates profoundness. Kindness
in giving creates love."
-- Lao-tzu
It costs me nothing to say "hello" and yet it might make all the difference to my
neighbor. It costs me nothing to give a hug and yet that hug might make all the
difference to a friend. It costs me nothing to listen to anothers pain and yet the
listening might make all the difference to another person.
Love is to be found in the small, ordinary acts of kindness as well as in the
extravagant gesture. I need to seek God in the everyday happenings of life alongside
the "religious". Spirituality is in the smile that is real!
Today I know that I give only what I received --- and I received a great deal. People
loved me enough to be patient, they cared enough to telephone, they encouraged me
with the gentle word of hope: I am in the flow.
Lord, You have created this wondrous patterned fabric of life --- may I find You in its
smallest detail.
************************************************** *********
Pleasant words are a honeycomb sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.
Proverbs 16:24
“Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for
the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”
1 Timothy 4:12
"For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is
the gift of God..."
Ephesians 2:8
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
You have the choice to do or not to do and realizing this allows you to accomplish more than you thought possible. Lord, help me make wise decisions with my time and not allow the pressures of life to drain my effectiveness.
Often times that which we find difficult is that which teaches. Lord, may I always be able to see the good that comes from even my trials.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
The Path To Self-Acceptance
"The most effective means of achieving self-acceptance is through applying the Twelve Steps of recovery."
IP No.19, "Self-Acceptance"
Our addiction has been a source of shame to many of us. We have hidden ourselves from others, sure that if anyone got to know who we really were they would reject us. NA helps us learn self-acceptance.
Many of us find a great deal of relief just from attending meetings, hearing fellow addicts share their stories, and discovering that others have felt the same way we feel about ourselves. When others share honestly with us who they are, we feel free to do the same. As we learn to tell others the truth about ourselves, we learn to accept ourselves.
Self-disclosure, however, is only the beginning. Once we've shared the things that make us uncomfortable with our lives, we need to find a different way to live - and that's where the steps come in. We develop a concept of a Higher Power. We inventory our lives, in detail, and discuss our inventory with our sponsor. We ask the God of our understanding to remove our character defects, the shortcomings that are the source of our troubles. We take responsibility for the things we've done and make amends for them. And we incorporate all these disciplines into our daily lives, "practicing these principles in all our affairs."
By working the steps, we can become people we are proud to be. We can freely tell the truth about ourselves, for we have nothing to hide.
Just for today: I will walk the path to self-acceptance. I will show up, tell the truth, and work the steps.
pg. 312
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Whoever is happy will make others happy, too. --Anne Frank
Anne Frank had good reason to be unhappy, full of fear, and deeply discouraged. Years of her life were spent in a small apartment hiding from the Nazis who wanted to destroy her and her family. Yet even in this little hiding place she had happiness. It was something she had inside which did not depend on what happened around her. She had riches of the heart. She had faith that kept her going. She had love and concern for her family and others, which made even a restricted life very rich with feelings. It is tempting to believe that we will be happy when we have something outside ourselves, which will make us happy. But happiness is not something we have to find outside; the seeds are in our hearts already.
What happiness can I find in my latest setback?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A man has made at least a start on discovering the meaning of human life when he plants shade trees under which he knows full well he will never sit. --D. Elton Trueblood
Our lives are enriched by the contributions of those who lived before us. Many men and women gave more than they ever took from society, and now we enjoy the rewards. Some people were fired with a spirit to beautify the world and planted trees that will live for 200 years. Others wrote music that speaks to us from another generation, and others established a government that guides our principles of justice. They gave so much because they knew they were a part of their community and the world.
Most of us cannot make the great contributions that will make us famous, but we enrich our lives when we contribute freely to improving our community and the world. We do that when we simply say hello to our neighbor, when we serve on a volunteer cleanup committee for a local park, and when we do Twelfth Step work in the program. We too have beautified and contributed to the world, and that gives us a feeling of peace and self-respect.
Today, I will appreciate all that comes freely to me from others, and I will give what I can to make the world a better place.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue, an everlasting vision of the ever-changing view. --Carole King
Every event of our lives is contributing a rich thread to our personal tapestry. Each of us is weaving one unique to ourselves, but all of our tapestries are complementary. We need others' rich designs in order to create our own.
We seldom have the foresight to understand the worth, the ultimate value of a particular circumstance at its beginning. But hindsight offers us clarity. It's good to reflect on the many circumstances that failed to thrill us; in all cases we can now see why we needed them. As our trust in God and the goodness of all experiences grows, we'll more quickly respond with gladness when situations are fresh. No experience is meant for harm. We are coming to understand that, even though on occasion we forget.
Practicing gratitude will help us more fully appreciate what has been offered us. Being grateful influences our attitude; it softens our harsh exterior and takes the threat out of most new situations.
If I greet the day, glad to be alive, I will be gladdened by all the experiences in store for me. Each is making a necessary contribution to my wholeness.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Clarity
I know better than to not trust God., But sometimes, I forget that.
When we are in the midst of an experience, it is easy to forget that there is a Plan. Sometimes, all we can see is today.
If we were to watch only two minutes of the middle of a television program, it would make little sense. It would be a disconnected event.
If we were to watch a weaver sewing a tapestry for only a few moments, and focused on only a small piece of the work, it would not look beautiful. It would look like a few peculiar threads randomly placed.
How often we use that same, limited perspective to look at our life - especially when we are going through a difficult time.
We can learn to have perspective when we are going through those confusing, difficult learning times. When we are being pelted by events that make us feel, think, and question, we are in the midst of learning something important.
We can trust that something valuable is being worked out in us - even when things are difficult, even when we cannot get our bearings. Insight and clarity do not come until we have mastered our lesson.
Faith is like a muscle. It must be exercised to grow strong. Repeated experiences of having to trust what we can't see and repeated experiences of learning to trust that things will work out are what makes our faith muscles grow strong.
Today, I will trust that the events in my life are not random. My experiences are not a mistake. The Universe, my Higher Power, and life are not picking on me. I am going through what I need to go through to learn something valuable, something that will prepare me for the joy and love I am seeking.
I am learning to trust the positive and loving people in my life today. --Ruth Fishel
************************************
Journey To The Heart
October 26
Let the World Help You Open Up
The universe is gentle, loving, benevolent, full of gifts, full of life, full of love. Don’t worry if you feel scared, or if you feel yourself closing down to life’s magic. That feeling won’t last long. It won’t last forever.
Take a walk. Touch a tree, hug it until your fear subsides. Feel the earth under your feet. Watch a sunrise. Ask the universe and God to help you open up. Say it aloud. Then watch what happens. Go where your heart leads, where your inner voice directs you to go. You will find yourself in circumstances that bring you back to your heart.
The universe will help you open up. It will do all it can, lovingly, gently, and with care. It will teach you all you need to know, help you learn all you came here to learn. It will guide you and lead you, open doors and shut windows, until you reach your destination– an open heart and a soul aligned with love.
*****
more language of letting go
Be aware of how you feel
What happened today? How did you feel about it?
Just like all those stuffed feelings from childhood that we could nor deal with then, any feelings that we repress or deny today don't go away. They linger in our energy field until we give them their due. Sometimes these repressed feelings block our view of the truth.
For many of us, resisting our feelings is an ancient pattern and a habitual way of life. Take your time to debrief from your day, but don't just say what you did and what you liked. Say how you felt about each thing that occurred.
You might make a discovery that surprises even you. You don't necessarily have to tell the other person how you feel, but you might. For certain, you at least need to tell yourself.
Today is just a simple reminder of something you already know. Be aware each day of what happens. And be aware of how you feel.
God, help me remember that it's okay to be who I am and feel what I feel, No matter what those feelings are. Remind me when I believe my feelings are a nuisance that they're the key to my power.
*****
Hard Learned Lessons
Bad Days by Madisyn Taylor
We all have bad days and within these days is usually a gem of a gift waiting to be opened.
We all have days from time to time when it feels like the world is against us or that the chaos we are experiencing will never end. One negative circumstance seems to lead to another. You may wonder, on a bad day, whether anything in your life will ever go right again. But a bad day, like any other day, can be a gift. Having a bad day can show you that it is time to slow down, change course, or lighten up. A bad day can help you glean wisdom you might otherwise have overlooked or discounted. Bad days can certainly cause you to experience uncomfortable feelings you would prefer to avoid, yet a bad day may also give you a potent means to learn about yourself.
You may consider a bad day to be one where you’ve missing an important meeting because your car stalled, the dryer broke, and you received a piece of very bad news earlier in the morning. Multiple misfortunes that take place one after the other can leave us feeling vulnerable and intensely cognizant of our fragility. But bad days can only have a long-term negative effect on us if we let them. It is better to ask yourself what you can learn from these kinds of days. The state of your bad day may be an indicator that you need to stay in and hibernate or let go of your growing negativity.
Bad days contribute to the people we become. Though we may feel discouraged and distressed on our bad days, a bad day can teach us patience and perseverance. It is important to remember that your attitude drives your destiny and that one negative experience does not have to be the beginning of an ongoing stroke of bad luck. A bad day is memorable because it is one day among many good days – otherwise, we wouldn’t even bother to acknowledge it as a bad day. Know too, that everybody has bad days, you are not alone, the world is not against you. Tomorrow is guaranteed to be a brighter day. Published with permission from Daily OM
************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
From time to time when I see the slogan, But for The Grace of God, I remember how I used to mouth those words when I saw others whose addictions had brought them to what I considered a “hopeless and helpless” state. The slogan had long been a cop-out for me, reinforcing my denial of my own addiction by enabling me to point to others seemingly worse off than I. “9if I ever get like that, I’ll quit,” was my on-repeated refrain. Today, instead, But for the Grace of God has become my prayer of thankfulness, reminding me to be grateful to my Higher Power for my recovery, my life, and the way of life I’ve found in The Program. Was anyone ever more “hopeless and helpless: than I?
Today I Pray
May I know that “but for The grace of God.” I could be dead or insane by now, because there have been others who wanted on addictive paths when I did who are no longer here. May that same grace of God help those who are still caught in the downward spin, who are heading for disaster as sure as gravity.
Today I Will Remember
I have seen God’s amazing Grace.
************************************
One More Day
Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
– Mark Twain
Even as we approached young adulthood, we clung to our dreams about the future. In those days it may have seemed to us that anything was possible.
It’s not immature to hold on to a dream, even when we know the dream is unlikely to come true. Bald men wish for a full head of hair. Some of us wish we still had young skin. Even through a long-term medical condition has become part of our lives, many of us still hold on to the illusions of our own health being restored.
Now we have a few more years — or decades — behind us. We accept that some things are possible and some are not. Most of us are comfortable with the knowledge. And still we hope.
I hold dearly to many of my illusions. The possibilities of what might occur keep my days full of excitement.
************************************
Food For Thought
Food Is Not Fun
We have used eating as a form of recreation and have looked for excitement in food. For years, we have associated food with fun. What we need to remember constantly is that uncontrolled eating is no longer fun for us, but a trip into anguish.
All of us have unpleasant memories of painful binges, which began as attempts to experience pleasure through a small indulgence. We need to put these memories to work for us by associating them with the first compulsive bite. The idea that more and better food will bring us fun and pleasure is an illusion. We know this in our heads, but we need to feel it in our guts.
Food is nourishment for our bodies - nothing more. To experience pleasure with our minds and hearts and bodies, we open ourselves to richer interpersonal relationships, to aesthetic experiences, to sports and hobbies and work well done. Abstinence from compulsive overeating liberates us to enjoy the activities, which are fun.
Thank You for the fun and joy that abstinence brings.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
Paths
“I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.”
Robert Frost
As a compulsive overeater, I longed to find a solution to my problems. Like so many of us, I tried all the heavily traveled roads ~ the endless means to lose weight and to alleviate my indulgent eating behaviors. But at the end -- and there was always an end -- of every new "method of weight loss" I returned to walking my old path of destructive compulsive overeating. I always went back to the old eating behaviors as well as the consequences of those behaviors. I had heard of OA but did not know anyone who belonged to its groups. It seemed like the whole world was on the latest fad diet -- diets that I could never continue for more than a few days or weeks.
Since joining The Recovery Group, I now walk a new path and have abandoned the old roads and the diet of the week. I have been on this road nearly a year now, and it is a wonderfully pleasant trek. I indeed believe "I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence." I have found an incredible amount of recovery spiritually, emotionally and physically. I am traveling on “the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference!”
One day at a time...
I will enjoy this road less taken...a path of acceptance and surrender. It is a path of spiritual, emotional and physical recovery!
~ Karen A.
*****************************************
AA 'Big Book' - Quote
There may be some wrongs we can never fully right. We don't worry about them if we can honestly say to ourselves that we would right them if we could. - Pg. 83 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
To insist stubbornly on clinging to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs?
May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions.
Our Own Good
Today, I accept that I do not always know what is best for me. There are times when I am completely confused about what to do for myself and for those around me, because I can't see how my own issues are surfacing and coloring my present. These are the days when I need to pray and to understand that my prayers are heard. I never whisper to God that I am not heard. Prayer is my medium for change and growth. It is with me all the time, and there is no moment when I can't elevate my consciousness and conscious contact through it. It is my way of talking to my higher self and turning over my lower self to the loving, compassionate care of a Higher Power.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'Always remember that each day as you look at your world and see millions upon millions of flowers opening up, God does it all without using any force.' ~Dr. Wayne Dyer (P 91, Everyday Wisdom)
If I have to force the solution, then it's not the solution.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Do not allow others to upset you; their only power comes from your reaction.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am learning to trust the positive and loving people in my life today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
A question to see if you're alcoholic: Have you ever been sunburned on the roof of your mouth? - Wino Joe.
bluidkiti
10-17-2021, 06:26 AM
October 27
Daily Reflections
GLOBAL SHARING
The only thing that matters is that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety.
These legacies of suffering and of recovery are easily passed among alcoholics, one to
the other. This is our gift from God, and its bestowal upon others like us is the one aim
that today animates A.A.'s all around the globe.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 151
The strength of Alcoholics Anonymous lies in the desire of each member and of each
group around the world to share with other alcoholics their suffering and the steps taken
to gain, and maintain, recovery. By keeping a conscious contact with my Higher Power, I
make sure that I always nurture my desire to help other alcoholics, thus insuring the
continuity of the wonderful fraternity of Alcoholics Anonymous.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Seventh, I can help other alcoholics. I am of some use in the world. I have a purpose in
life. I am worth something at last. My life has a direction and a meaning. All that feeling
of futility is gone. I can do something worthwhile. God has given me a new lease on life so
that I can help other alcoholics. He has let me live through all the hazards of my alcoholic
life to bring me at last to a place of real usefulness in the world. He has let me live for
this. This is my opportunity and my destiny. I am worth something! Will I give as much of
my life as I can to A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
All of us have our own battle to win, the battle between the material view of life and the
spiritual view. Something must guide our lives. Will it be wealth, pride, selfishness, greed
or will it be faith, honesty, purity, unselfishness, love and service? Each one has a choice.
We can choose good or evil. We cannot choose both. Are we going to keep striving
until we win the battle? If we win the victory, we can believe that even God in His heaven
will rejoice.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may choose the good and resist the evil. I pray that I will not be a loser in the
battle for righteousness.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
A Mighty Beginning, p. 298
Even the newest of newcomers find undreamed rewards as he tries to
help his brother alcoholic, the one who is even blinder than he. This is
indeed the kind of giving that actually demands nothing. He does not
expect his brother sufferer to pay him, or even to love him.
And then he discovers that through the divine paradox of this kind of
giving he has found his own reward, whether or not his brother has yet
received anything. His own character may still be gravely defective,
but he somehow knows that God has enabled him to make a mighty
beginning, and he senses that he stands at the edge of new mysteries,
joys, and experiences of which he had never before dreamed.
12 & 12, pp. 109-110
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Is your opinion of me important?
Inventory
A statement that is often quoted at AA meetings is Your opinion of me is not important. The purpose of this saying, apparently, is to wean us away from being people pleasers.
But the truth is that we all have legitimate interest in the opinions others hold of us. They may like or dislike us for the wrong reasons, but it is helpful for us to know this and accept it.
More important, the opinions of others can be useful in helping us take personal inventory and correct wrong behavior and attitudes. There may be a good reason why someone has a low opinion of us, and we should become aware of it.
It is true, however, that our opinions count the most in shaping our lives. If we're thinking badly about others, that can be more damaging to us than to them. Surprisingly, they may think better of us as we change our opinions about them.
I doubt that I can go through the day without being affected by other people's opinions of me. However, my main work will be in seeing that my own opinions aren't being destructive in my life.
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Keep It Simple
An excuse is worst and more terrible than a lie.---Alexander Pope
Excuses. They’re lies. We use excuses to hide from ourselves. Maybe we don’t want to be honest about our anger. So we say someone else made us angry. Maybe we don’t want to admit how mean we can be. So we pretend we have no part in what happens.
Excuses keep us from ourselves. They keep us from our High Power. A lot of our program is about looking at ourselves. Steps Four, Five, and Ten tell us to be honest about our excuses. We can be honest because we are good people. We are loved.
Prayer for the day: Today, I’ll say the serenity Prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Action for the Day: I’ll list my five most often excuses. Then, I’ll share them with my friends, family, and sponsor. I’ll ask them to tell me when I make excuses.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Problems have only the size and the power that you give them. --S. H.
We will not be free from all difficulties today, or during any period of our lives. But we have the personal power to eliminate the threat, the sting of any challenge. But it's our vision of circumstances that gives them their interpretation.
At this moment, we are defining our experience. We are labeling events good or bad, valuable or meaningless. And our growth, particularly this day, is greatly influenced by the value judgments we attach to our experiences.
As we grow stronger emotionally and spiritually, we learn that all difficulties are truly opportunities for exceptional growth and increased awareness of the truth of existence. All experiences can be taken in stride if we are trustful of their intended blessing.
We are sharing this life, every moment of it, with a power greater than ourselves. We need not worry about any circumstance. Always we are watched over. We never need struggle alone.
We can let go of our problems. It's ourselves and that attitude we have cultivated that makes any situation a problem. We can turn it loose and therein discover the solution.
I will not make mountains out of the molehills of my life.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Many a man, yet dazed from his hospital experience, has stepped over the threshold of that home into freedom. Many an alcoholic who entered there came away with an answer. He succumbed to that gay crowd inside, who laughed at their own misfortunes and understood his. Impressed by those who visited him at the hospital, he capitulated entirely when, later, in an upper room of this house, he heard the story of some man whose experience closely tallied with his own. The expression on the faces of the women, that indefinable something in the eyes of the men, the stimulating and electric atmosphere of the place, conspired to let him know that here was haven at last.
p. 160
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
As I spoke, I looked around the room. More importantly, I looked at the faces of the people in the room and I saw it. I saw the understanding, the empathy, the love. Today I believe I saw my Higher Power for the first time in those faces. While still up at the podium, it hit me--this is what I had been looking for all my life. This was the answer, right here in front of me. Indescribable relief came over me; I knew the fight was over.
p. 326
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
So when A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do. Both his pride and his fear beat him back every time he tries to look within himself. Pride says, "You need not pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!" But the testimony of A.A.'s who have really tried a moral inventory is that pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogeymen, nothing else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing ourselves is indescribable. These are the first fruits of Step Four.
pp. 49-50
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Real joy comes not from ease or riches or from the praise of others, but from doing
something worthwhile.
--Wilfred Grenfell
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them or even touch them on the shoulder...you
are blessed because you can offer healing touch.
--unknown
"Never let yesterday use up today."
--Richard H. Nelson
LETTING GO
I feel so scared
Let go
I am so worried
Just let go
I am so angry
Please let go
My insanity keeps growing
I beseech thee to just let go
I am so peaceful
Thank you, you let it go
--Deborah Ann Smith
Forgiveness means letting go of the past.
--Gerald Jampolsky
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
JUSTICE
"Justice is truth in action."
Benjamin Disraeli
It is not enough for me to believe that a thing is true, it is important for me to live out
my beliefs. For too long I had a thousand beliefs that only kept me silent. A fear of
displeasing others played a large part in my silence.
Today I understand justice to be part of what I mean by spirituality: I need to be seen
to walk as I talk! I am comfortable when I remain silent in the face of injustice. As a
recovering alcoholic, this uncomfortability is dangerous because it can so easily lead
to low self-esteem, anger, resentments and relapse.
Today I know I can have a slip without taking a drink. I slip from where I want to be
in my life. My personal integrity combines a justice that can be seen in my lifestyle.
O God of justice, teach me never again to hide in the lie of silence.
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"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly
lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."
James 1:17
"Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the
breastplate of righteousness in place."
Ephesians 4:14
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Daily Inspiration
It is the little bits of kindness and love that make this world happy. Lord, may I do my part to make today happy for someone.
There is no personal problem that you cannot solve. Lord, Your presence within me is all power. You are my help in every need.
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NA Just For Today
Living In The Present
"We want to look our past in the face, see it for what it really was, and release it so we can live today."
Basic Text, p.28
For many of us, the past is like a bad dream. Our lives aren't the same any more, but we still have fleeting, highly charged emotional memories of a really uncomfortable past. The guilt, fear, and anger that once dominated us may spill into our new life, complicating our efforts to change and grow.
The Twelve Steps are the formula that helps us learn to put the past in its place. Through the Fourth and Fifth Steps, we become aware that our old behavior didn't work. We ask a Higher Power to relieve us of our shortcomings in the Sixth and Seventh Steps, and we begin to be relieved of the guilt and fear that plagued us for so many years. In the Eighth and Ninth Steps, by making amends, we demonstrate to others that our lives are changing. We are no longer controlled by the past. Once the past loses its control over us, we are free to find new ways to live, ways that reflect who we truly are.
Just for today: I don't have to be controlled by my past. I will live this new day as the new person I am becoming.
pg. 313
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Walk. Don't walk. --Traffic Light
Signs direct us on our way in life. Traffic lights tell us to walk (or not), Golden Arches point us to dinner, geese flying south herald the coming winter, flashing neon tells us what to buy. We know how to read these signs of worlds and weather; they help to guide us on our journey.
We can learn to read the signs of human beings, too, to be detectives of the human spirit. Laugh lines around eyes and mouth, the texture of hands, tension in jaws and shoulders can tell much about a person, if we stop to look. All around us are signs that tell us others feel the pain and joy we feel, others need us as we need them, we are understood, and we are not alone.
The marvelous bonus in learning to read these signs in others is that we can begin to let ourselves be read, also.
Will I make good reading for others today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I feel the more I know God, that He would sooner we did wrong in loving than never love for fear we should do wrong.
--Father Andrew
Love has often been called the first rule of a spiritual life. As we awaken to our new life in this program, we learn that all of God's creation is full of objects for us to love. A sunset repeats the creative energy at work in our world today. It appears briefly, invites our love, and slowly fades away, only to be repeated in a new form the next day. The color and markings on a little bug may inspire our love, as may the smell of moist earth, the excitement of a Broadway musical, the craftsmanship of a well-made tool, or the look of warmth on a friend's face. These are all opportunities for us to let go and feel our love.
We men often feel awkward in expressing love. Perhaps we're so self-conscious and guarded that we brace ourselves against saying or doing anything that wouldn't look good. We're learning through our spiritual development to be more fervent lovers and less perfectionistic in love.
I will be renewed today each time I appreciate something near me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Problems have only the size and the power that you give them. --S. H.
We will not be free from all difficulties today, or during any period of our lives. But we have the personal power to eliminate the threat, the sting of any challenge. But it's our vision of circumstances that gives them their interpretation.
At this moment, we are defining our experience. We are labeling events good or bad, valuable or meaningless. And our growth, particularly this day, is greatly influenced by the value judgments we attach to our experiences.
As we grow stronger emotionally and spiritually, we learn that all difficulties are truly opportunities for exceptional growth and increased awareness of the truth of existence. All experiences can be taken in stride if we are trustful of their intended blessing.
We are sharing this life, every moment of it, with a power greater than ourselves. We need not worry about any circumstance. Always we are watched over. We never need struggle alone.
We can let go of our problems. It's ourselves and that attitude we have cultivated that makes any situation a problem. We can turn it loose and therein discover the solution.
I will not make mountains out of the molehills of my life.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Step Eleven
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. --Step Eleven of Al Anon
"... praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" means that we ask on a daily basis to be shown the plan for that day. We also ask our Source for the power we need to carry that through. We will get a yes to both requests.
We do not ask other people to show their will for us. We ask God. Then we trust that we'll be empowered to carry God's will through.
God never, never asks us to do anything that He would not equip us to do. He never asks us to do anything we can't do. If we are to do it, we will be empowered. That's the easy part of this program. We never have to do more than we can, or anything we can't. If we want to worry and fuss we can, but we don't need to. That is our choice.
I have learned, through difficult and good times that this Step will carry me through. When I don't know what to do next, God does. Working this Step, one day at a time, will take us to places we could never have traveled on our own. Simple acts, done daily in accordance to God's will for us, lead to a Grand Plan for our life.
Today, I will focus on asking God to show me what He wants me to do. I will ask God for the power to do that; then I will go ahead and get the job done. God, help me let go of my fears about living life one day at a time. Help me trust that when life is lived simply and in trust, a beautiful mosaic called "my life" will be woven. I am being divinely led, guided, and cared for.
Today I practice restraint of tongue and pen and I do not hurt anyone intentionally. Today I give myself time to express myself appropriately. Today I go beyond negative feelings. I act as if I am coming from a place of love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 27
Have You Been Working Too Hard?
Have you been working too hard at your job, at life, at your spiritual progress? Have you been working too hard on your relationships with people, or trying to gain insights, or on trying to figure out where to go or what to do next?
Many of us have had to work hard. To get from where we were to where we are, we had to push, force, put one foot in front of the other. At least we thought we did. But life doesn’t have to be that hard. Not anymore. The biggest task, the smallest task, the task of living our lives doesn’t have to be that difficult.
There’s a natural rhythm for everything that happens along the way. There’s a natural rhythm and order for all we’re to do. Yes, there are times to begin. Yes, there are times to put one foot in front of the other and go forward. But the joy, the service, the way of life we’re seeking doesn’t come from force. It comes naturally, easily, much more easily than you think. Stop pushing so hard, and see how quickly that rhythm finds you.
You don’t have to make life happen. In fact, you can’t. Relax. Let go. And let it happen.
*****
more language of letting go
Be aware of the illusion of control
Remember how it feels when we try to control someone else.
"I was driving down the road one day behind a car that I decided was driving too slowly," a friend said to me. "I was yelling, raging, and carrying on about the driver in front of me, trying to mentally will him out of my way. I wanted him to move over and let me by.
"While I was driving I observed myself. Then I started to laugh. I wasn't angry about this driver in front of me. I was angry because I was trying to control something that I couldn't change."
Be aware of all your feelings. But also remember to be aware that sometimes it's not the other person that's making us crazy. We're doing it to ourselves.
God, help me be aware of the self-created drama in my life. Help me let go of my need to control. Give me the courage of my feelings. And help me be aware of when my self-will is running riot.
*****
Reviving a Community Tradition
Storytelling by Madisyn Taylor
Most cultures use storytelling to pass down family history using the power and energy of the human voice.
Ever since our ancestors could first communicate, we have gathered to share our stories. We have passed along creation tales and tragic stories of love lost. We have repeated accounts of real heroism and simple stories of family history. When our forebears lived closer to the land and to each other, the practice of storytelling was imbued with ritual and occasion. Members of the tribe would often gather around the fire to hear their genealogy recited aloud by an elder or master storyteller. Listeners could track how their own lives, and the lives of their parents, interwove with the lives of the other tribe members, as everyone’s ancient relatives once played out similar life dramas together.
As a custom, some cultures’ storytellers repeat the same tale over and over because they believe that each time you hear it, you come to the story as a different person and view the plot and characters in a new light. Hearing the story over and over is a way to gauge where you have been and where you are now on your path of personal evolution. It also helps the younger generation learn the stories so that they can pass them to forthcoming generations.
When we hear others tell stories, we can laugh at their humorous adventures, feel the thrill of exciting encounters, see parts of ourselves in them, and learn from the challenges they face. Though most of our formal traditions of storytelling are lost, it does not mean we have to be without. We can begin new practices in our own families of listening to one another, of honoring our own journey, and witnessing the journeys of those around us. We can revive the fireside communal by gathering around the campfire or hearth with family and friends, sharing in stories. By building new practices of storytelling, we give ourselves and the ones we love an opportunity to draw ever closer in our shared human experience. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
The Program’s Fourth Step suggests that we make a fearless moral inventory of ourselves. For so many of us, especially newcomers, the task seems impossible. Each time we take pencil in hand and try to look inward, Pride says confidingly, “You don’t have to bother to look.” And Fear cautions, “You’d better not look.” We find eventually that this sort of pride and fear are mere wisps of smoke, the cloudy strands from which we woven the mythology of our old ideas. When we push pride and fear aside and finally make a fearless inventory, we experience relief and a new sense of confidence beyond description. Have I made an inventory? Have I shared its rewards so as to encourage others?
Today I Pray
May I not be stalled by my inhibitions when it comes to making a moral inventory of myself. May I not get to the Fourth Step and then screech to a stop because the task seems overwhelming. May I know that my inventory today, even though I try to make it “thorough” and honest, may not be as complete as it will be if I repeat it again, for the process of self-discovery goes on and on.
Today I will Remember
Praise God for Progress.
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One More Day
Better be alone than in bad company.
–Thomas Fuller
Most of us have had the experience of being befriended by someone who seems to want to spend every waking moment in our company. At first, we may be delighted with the attention and enjoy the excitement of the developing relationship. Then, suddenly we feel smothered. The other person gives us no time along; he or she is such a constant presence that we feel out of touch with ourselves.
We seem to have to choose between crushing our new friend or submitting to the constant intrusion, but first we may need to remind ourselves that we have the right to create the framework of our company is not our choice, we are free to say, “I need more time alone.” This isn’t a rejection of others; it’s an affirmation of ourselves and our need for solitude.
I can find a healthy balance between my time with others and my time alone.
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Food For Thought
A Good Meal
A good meal for us is an abstinent meal. Fancy frills and gourmet delights are not good if they threaten our abstinence. Because we have over emphasized food in the past, we tend to be too concerned about what we will have for dinner - and lunch - and breakfast.
It is a relief to come to the conclusion that whatever we have to eat is good if it fits our food plan. We do not have to spend a lot of time and energy deciding what we will eat today. If what we choose does not turn out to be especially pleasing, we are free to choose something else tomorrow.
Most of us are familiar with the basic principles of good nutrition. By abstaining from compulsive overeating, we are giving our bodies the best possible treatment. By avoiding refined sugars and starches, we eliminate empty calories and choose those foods with the protein, vitamins, and minerals necessary for good health. Whatever we eat, the abstinent meal is a good meal.
Thank You for good, abstinent meals.
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One Day At A Time
Living in the Present
“As long as you are seeking to find happiness somewhere,
you are overlooking where true happiness is.”
Gangaji
Happiness is always somewhere else, isn’t it? It is all too human to put off our happiness until a more appropriate or perfect time. Ideally, we know that happiness is not a matter of timing; it is a state of mind caused by even the smallest actions that we take (or fail to take) each day. However, I often used to remark to others that, “One day I will be happy when I get thin.” I got much thinner, but never thin enough, it seems. “One day I will take a night course.” I was so busy working, “on-call”, and doing things for others that I never managed to find the time.
“One day I will start this new food Plan,” I’d promised myself. It had worked for others. I truly wanted to give myself a chance to see if it could work for me too, yet I approached it haphazardly, at first. On paper, any food plan is just a diet, unless, you have a Sponsor, use the Tools, and work the Steps! I’d been told this over and over, and later--lived the actual experience of doing it my way. As long as I told myself, “One day I will find the time for me,” it didn’t come about!
One day at a time...
I now realize that as long as I keep looking to the future in order to allot myself wonderful challenges and small joys, I am choosing to postpone my happiness until my life is perfect, which is never in the realm of reality. I believe that this is why those who have gone before us in recovery suggest that we live life on life’s terms to the best of our ability just “One day at a time.”
~ January K.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Resentment is the 'number one' offender. It destroys more alcohlolics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. - Pg. 64 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Even when we consciously don't think we want to get high, our disease of addiction works through our subconscious and calls, 'what do they know; just one won't hurt; well, if they're going to be like that!' Our subconscious pops silly excuses for using into our minds. We must learn to recognize and neutralize these thoughts.
May my subconscious 'arguments' that subtly tell me to use, have no power to influence my true goal of staying clean and clear.
Freeing Me
Today, I understand that in forgiving someone else I free myself. I held back on forgiveness because it seemed too kind an act for those who had hurt me. Why should I make them feel good? Why should I let them off the hook? I understand now that forgiving someone else and letting go - when I am truly ready - dissolves the resentment that is stored within me. I will not jump to forgiveness too quickly, forcing myself to do what I am not sincerely able to do. I will not forgive because it is the right thing to do. I will fully feel and acknowledge all that blocks me, and I will give myself the time I need to do this. When I do forgive, it will be to set myself free, to let go of the past and move on.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Probably any one of us can get along with perfect people, but our task is to get along with imperfect people. The worst part of trying to get along with imperfect people is that they refuse to change into what we want.
When I think about how hard it is to change myself, I know how hard it will be to change others.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You don't get drunk watching another drink. You don't get serenity watching others do the steps.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I practice restraint of tongue and pen and I do not hurt anyone intentionally. Today I give myself time to express myself appropriately. Today I go beyond negative feelings. I act as if I am coming from a place of love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If you take alcohol out of my life, I'm left with emptiness, darkness, despair, and all-consuming hopelessness. If it's not replaced with something of value, I must drink. And I know absolutely, from my experience, that Alcoholics Anonymous is that something of value that fills that hole and fulfills every need I shall ever have. - Cubby S.
bluidkiti
10-21-2021, 04:11 AM
October 28
Daily Reflections
AN UNBROKEN TRADITION
We conceive the survival and spread of Alcoholics Anonymous to be something of far
greater importance than the weight we could collectively throw back of any other cause.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 177
How much it means to me that an unbroken tradition of more than half a century is a
thread that connects me to Bill W. and Dr. Bob. How much more grounded I feel to be in
a Fellowship whose aims are constant and unflagging. I am grateful that the energies of
A.A. have never been scattered, but focused instead on our members and on individual
sobriety. My beliefs are what make me human; I am free to hold any opinion, but A.A.'s
purpose -- so clearly stated fifty years ago -- is for me to keep sober. That purpose has
promoted round-the-clock meeting schedules, and the thousands of intergroup and central
service offices, with their thousands of volunteers. Like the sun focused through a
magnifying glass, A.A.'s single vision has lit a fire of faith in sobriety in millions of hearts,
including mine.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
What other rewards have come to me as a result of my new way of living? Each one of us
can answer this question in many ways. My relationship with my husband or my wife is on
an entirely new plane. The total selfishness is gone and more cooperation has taken its
place. My home is a home again. Understanding has taken the place of misunderstanding
recriminations, bickering, and resentment. A new companionship has developed which
bodes well for the future. "There are homes where fires burn and there is bread, lamps
are lit and prayers are said. Though people falter through the dark and nations grope,
with God Himself back of these little homes, we still can hope." Have I come home?
Meditation For The Day
We can bow to God's will in anticipation of the thing happening which will, in the long run,
be the best for all concerned. It may not always seem the best thing at the present time,
but we cannot see as far ahead as God can. We do not know how His plans are laid, we
only need to believe that if we trust Him and accept whatever happens as His will in a
spirit of faith, everything will work out for the best in the end.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not ask to see the distant scene. I pray that one step may be enough for
me.
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As Bill Sees It
Anonymity and Sobriety, p. 299
As the A.A. groups multiplied, so did anonymity problems.
Enthusiastic over the spectacular recovery of a brother alcoholic, we'd
sometimes discuss those intimate and harrowing aspects of his case
meant for his sponsor's ear alone. The aggrieved victim would then
rightly declare that his trust had been broken.
When such stories got into circulation outside of A.A., the loss of
confidence in our anonymity promise was severe. It frequently turned
people from us. Clearly, every A.A. member's name--and story,
too--had to be confidential, if he wished.
<< << << >> >> >>
We now fully realize that 100 per cent personal anonymity before the
public is just as vital to the life of A.A. as 100 per cent sobriety is to
the life of each and every member. This is not counsel of fear; it is the
prudent voice of long experience.
1. 12 & 12, p. 185
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 293
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Walk In Dry Places
The new problems in sobriety
Fortitude
Sometimes sobriety turns up problems that were never apparent during one's drinking days. Some people, for example, encounter marriage problems that lead to divorce. It almost appears that some things were better when we were drinking.
But there are good reasons why sobriety brings new problems. One is that we become aware of problems that were there all the time, although not acknowledged. It's possible, too, that sobriety brings more responsibility, along with risks of failure. At the same time, we might be more sensitive to the real problems of living.
We should never use such problems as an excuse for drinking. It is true, as many people say, that drinking can only make matters worse. Nothing can be improved by a return to drinking.
I must remember today that sobriety means living on a new basis. This includes facing problems and dealing with them... not running from them as I did in the past.
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Keep It Simple
I wish you the courage to be warm when the world would prefer you to be cool.Robert A. Ward
Our program and the Steps have warmed us from the inside out. Just as a bonfire warms those who stand around it, the Steps take away the chill we have felt for so long.
At Times, we’ll be tempted to move away from the Steps. At times, we’ll get tired of looking at our behavior and attitudes. We are by nature, controlling people. We’ll want to
“prove our point” about something when our program tells us to let it go. We need to stay close to the Steps and the warmth they hold. Remember the chill of our disease.
Prayer for the Day: I need to member that the Steps and the fellowship of the program keep me sober, not me alone.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll thank about what the Steps have done for me. I will think of how they have kept me warm.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The most elusive knowledge of all is self-knowledge. --Mirra Komarovsky
Discovering who we are is an adventure, one that will thrill and sometimes trouble us and will frequently occupy our thoughtful reflections. We are growing and changing as a result of our commitment to the program. And it's that process of commitment that heightens our self-awareness.
We learn who we are by listening to others, by sensing their perceptions of us, by taking an honest, careful inventory of our own behavior. The inner conversations that haunt us while we're interacting with others are poignant guidelines to self-knowledge, self-definition. Just when we think we've figured out who we are and how to handle our flaws, a new challenge will enter our realm of experiences, shaking up all the understandings that have given us guidance heretofore.
It is not an easy task to discover who we really are. It's an even harder job to love and accept the woman we discover. But too many years went by while we avoided or denied or, worse yet, denounced the only person we knew how to be. The program offers us the way to learn about and love fully the person within. Nor will we find the way easy every day. But there's time enough to let the process ease our investigation.
I will be soft and deliberate today as I listen to others and myself.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
The very practical approach to his problems, the absence of intolerance of any kind, the informality, the genuine democracy, the uncanny understanding which these people had were irresistible. He and his wife would leave elated by the thought of what they could now do for some stricken acquaintance and his family. They knew they had a host of new friends; it seemed they had known these strangers always. They had seen miracles, and one was to come to them. They had visioned the Great Reality—their loving and All Powerful Creator.
pp. 160-161
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
Later on that night, still reeling in the ecstasy of relief and hope, I remembered the afternoon in the bathroom stall at college after my first class when I was so certain I had found the answer in alcohol. I could clearly see now that had been a lie. That is the description that fits alcohol best for me; it is a lie, an evil, insidious lie. And I chased that lie for a long time--even when it was obvious that I was going nowhere and killing myself while doing it. At that A.A. meeting, when I looked over all those faces, I finally saw the truth.
p. 326
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
By now the newcomer has probably arrived at the following conclusions: that his character defects, representing instincts gone astray, have been the primary cause of his drinking and his failure at life; that unless he is now willing to work hard at the elimination of the worst of these defects, both sobriety and peace of mind will still elude him; that all the faulty foundation of his life will have to be torn out and built anew on bedrock. Now willing to commence the search for his own defects, he will ask, "Just how do I go about this? How do I take inventory of myself?"
p. 50
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As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 -1882)
Although we have been made to believe that if we let go we will end up with nothing,
life itself reveals again and again the opposite; that letting go is the path to real
freedom.
--Sogyai Rinpoche
This above all else: to your own self be true.
--unknown
Outstanding leaders go out of the way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If
people believe in themselves, it's amazing what they can accomplish.
--Sam Walton
The deeds you do today may be the only sermon some people will hear today.
--St. Francis of Assisi
Make big decisions in the calm.
--Dwight D. Eisenhower
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ORATORY
"The finest eloquence is that
which get things done."
-- David Lloyd George
I know how to talk. I know how to sound good. I know how to convince a person of my
good intentions --- indeed that was part of my manipulation for years.
Today I try to walk the talk. I try to demonstrate what I say in the behavior I exhibit.
The bottom line is action. Talking never stopped me from drinking --- my physical refusal
of the first drink was the start of my recovery.
God is to be discovered not merely in pious sentiments, as attractive as they may
sound, but rather in the small steps of altered behavior.
Am I doing what I am saying? Lord give me the courage to live my words.
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God blesses the people who patiently endure testing.
James 1:12
Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart.
Psalm 86:11
"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you,
along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other,
just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."
Ephesians 4:31-32
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Daily Inspiration
It is usually easier to start a project than to finish it. Lord, help me spend less time thinking about what I want to do, so that I can have the time to feel the gratification of completing what I started.
Pray even when your heart has no words rather than to pray words with no heart. Lord, You faithfully answer all prayers. I will trust in Your answers and never take Your love for granted.
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NA Just For Today
Attitudes
"We can also use the steps to improve our attitudes."
Basic Text, p.53
Ever have a day when everything seems to be working against you? Do you go through periods when you are so busy taking people's inventories you can barely stand yourself? What about when you find yourself snapping at your co-worker or loved one for no reason? When we find ourselves in this bleak frame of mind, we need to take action.
At any point in the day, we can set aside a few moments and take a "spot inventory." We examine how we are reacting to outside situations and other people. When we do, we may find that we are suffering from a plain old "bad attitude." A negative outlook can hurt our relationship with our Higher Power and the people in our lives. When we are honest with ourselves, we frequently find that the problem lies with us and our attitude.
We have no control over the challenges life gives us. What we can control is how we react to those challenges. At any point in time, we can change our attitude. The only thing that really changes in Narcotics Anonymous is us. The Twelve Steps give use the tools to move out of the problem and into the solution.
Just for today: Throughout the day, I will check my attitude. I will apply the steps to improve it.
pg. 314
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in human beings. --Pearl S. Buck
We owe each other respect. We cannot expect to be respected if we don't respect others around us. When we respect others, we respect their property and personal belongings as well as their self-esteem and their right to voice an opinion. Respect is a way of cooperating with each other.
We can imagine a submarine where crewmembers did not respect each other's personal belongings or their ability to do the job. The ship would soon stop functioning because of the chaos. In a family we live in close quarters, like a submarine crew. Respect for each other is one of the things, which keeps chaos from breaking out. When we grow in respect for each other's property, abilities, and self-esteem, we soon see how valuable each member of our crew really is.
How can I show respect to those around me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Often our trust is not full. We are not certain that God hears us because we consider ourselves worthless and as nothing. This is ridiculous and the very cause of our weakness. I have felt this way myself. --Julian of Norwich
Many men do not think they are worthy of recovery. Some of us even fight against our own progress. We can't seem to reconcile our low self-image with all the benefits recovery brings. This is not surprising when we see how many years we lived in self-abusive addictions. We had lifestyles in which we were treated badly by others, we abused ourselves, and we used and abused others. In our insanity, this sometimes felt masculine. Such a life does not prepare us to feel worthy of the good things in recovery. It is ridiculous to continue such pain simply because it's what we have known.
To turn this pattern around, we have to accept our Higher Power's view of us. Our Higher Power accepts us and sees us as deserving the benefits of recovery. We can get out of the way of our recovery by letting go of our unworthy feelings.
Today, I will be open to the benefits of recovery.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The most elusive knowledge of all is self-knowledge. --Mirra Komarovsky
Discovering who we are is an adventure, one that will thrill and sometimes trouble us and will frequently occupy our thoughtful reflections. We are growing and changing as a result of our commitment to the program. And it's that process of commitment that heightens our self-awareness.
We learn who we are by listening to others, by sensing their perceptions of us, by taking an honest, careful inventory of our own behavior. The inner conversations that haunt us while we're interacting with others are poignant guidelines to self-knowledge, self-definition. Just when we think we've figured out who we are and how to handle our flaws, a new challenge will enter our realm of experiences, shaking up all the understandings that have given us guidance heretofore.
It is not an easy task to discover who we really are. It's an even harder job to love and accept the woman we discover. But too many years went by while we avoided or denied or, worse yet, denounced the only person we knew how to be. The program offers us the way to learn about and love fully the person within. Nor will we find the way easy every day. But there's time enough to let the process ease our investigation.
I will be soft and deliberate today as I listen to others and myself.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Meditation and Prayer
The Eleventh Step asks us to meditate as a route to improving our conscious contact with God.
Meditation is different than obsessing or worrying. Obsession and worrying are fear connections. Meditation means opening our mind and our spiritual energy to the God connection.
To connect with God, we need to relax as best we can and open our conscious and subconscious mind to a Higher Consciousness - one that is available to each of us.
In the busyness of our day and life, it may seem like a waste of time to slow down, to stop what we're doing, and take this kind of break. It is no more a waste of time than stopping to put gas in our car when the tank is almost empty. It is necessary, it is beneficial, and it saves time. In fact, meditation can create more time and energy than the moments we take to do it.
Meditation and prayer are powerful recovery behaviors that work. We need to be patient. It is not reasonable to expect immediate answers, insight, or inspiration.
But solutions are coming. They are already on the way, if we have done our part - meditate and pray - and then let the rest go.
Whether we pray and meditate first thing in the morning, during a coffee break, or in the evening is our choice.
When our conscious contact with God improves, our subconscious contact will too. We will find ourselves increasingly tuned in to God's harmony and will for us. We will find and maintain that soul connection, the God connection.
Today, I will take a moment for meditation and prayer. I will decide when and how long to do it. I am a child and creation of God - a Higher Power who loves to listen and talk to me. God, help me let go of my fears about whether or not You hear and care. Help me know that You are there and that I am able to tap into the spiritual consciousness.
It feels so good to like all of me today. I feel warm and comforted in knowing that I am just fine... just the way I am. --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey to the Heart
Let Yourself Take Side Trips
"You're on a journey," the Native American shaman from Sedona said, "bit it's not what you think. Don't be like the deer, who looks straight ahead and sees only the destination. Let yourself take all the side trips you can. Travel the back roads, take your time. Talk to people and touch the trees. See all you've come here to see."
Sometimes we need to make side trips-- side trips into experiences, emotions, situations that take us off center and somewhere new. Sometimes that's where our greatest learning and growth occur.
If a safe trip is beckoning, perhaps there's a lesson there: an old feeling to be felt, healed, and cleared; a new attitude or belief to be acquired; a revelation, a surprise. Remember this: a side trip, with all it's emotions, isn't about another person. It's about you and your journey to healing, freedom, and joy. Ignoring a situation that can take you off center won't take you to the next place. Going more deeply into your own growth process, going more deeply into your soul is what will further your journey.
Everything that happens to you can be used, felt, shaped and transformed to further your journey. This process of growth, of side trips and healing, is your destiny, the magical journey of your soul.
To get to the next place, we need to leave the comfortable main road we've been traveling. Sometimes a side trip is exactly what we need to make.
*****
more language of letting go
Let enlightenment come
Sometimes, the harder we try to see a lesson, the more lost and confused we become. "What does it mean?" we ask, squinting at the problem.
Relax. Let go of your expectations and you interpretations. Quit trying so hard to see.
Sometimes the lesson may be a simple reminder to see the sacred in your ordinary life or to practice compassion for yourself as well as for others. Sometimes what we're going through is part of a larger lesson, one that may take us years to complete and comprehend. It's easy to fall into the false belief that there's some lesson that we have to push and struggle to learn. There isn't.
We only have to see what we see and know what we know right now.
Experience your life.
More shall be revealed when it's time.
Practice seeing without squinting.
God, help me be present to the situations in my life without trying to read too deeply into them. Help me trust that my lessons will become clear when it's time.
*****
Energy to Spare
Knowing Your Limits
Every human life is defined, to some extent, by limits. No one person is capable of fulfilling every possibility. We are all born with unique aptitudes and sensitivities, and it is these qualities that largely determine the paths we will travel in life. What invigorates, excites, and inspires one individual may exhaust or overwhelm another. When we understand what we as individuals are capable of reasonably handling, we gradually learn to accept that we have control over our wellbeing. Yet determining where our limits lie can be difficult, as it is likely we have been told time and again that the discomfort, fatigue, and stress we felt while engaging in activities outside the range of our comfort zones was all in our heads. If you have never before given thought to the notion of personal limits, creating a list of those tasks and situations that leave you feeling drained can give you insight into your own.
You will know definitively that you are operating within your limits when you have the necessary energy and drive to address your personal and professional commitments. This is not to say you should not push yourself or work to extend the range of your capabilities. The wisdom you gain through dynamic self-examination will give you the tools you need to create an individual life strategy that allows you to achieve your goals without compromising yourself or your needs. The limits you honor by focusing your energy on what you can do rather than what you cannot do will not interfere with your ambitions unless you allow them to interfere. You can thrive within your limits, actively shape your circumstances, and avoid anguish by simply recognizing that certain aspects of life nourish you while others drain you, and doing your best to perceive the fine line between applying yourself diligently and overworking yourself.
You may be surprised to discover that your limits change over time. Your willingness to accept these limits as they reveal themselves to you can smooth your passage through life and give you the means to flourish. Published with permission from Daily OM
*****
A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day
"Pride, like a magnet, constantly points to one object, self; unlike the magnet, it has no attractive pole, but at all points repels." - Colton
When the earliest members of The Program discovered just how spiritually prideful they could be, they admonished one another to avoid "instant sainthood." That old-time warning could be taken as an alibi to excuse us from doing our best, but it's really The Program's way of warning against "prideful blindness" and the imaginary perfections we don't possess.
Am I beginning to understand the difference between pride and humility?
Today I Pray
May God, who in His mercy has saved our lives, keep us from setting ourselves up as the saints and prophets of The Program. May we recognize the value of our experiences for others without getting smug about it. May we remember with humility and love the thousands of other "old hands" who are equally well-versed in its principles.
Today I Will Remember
I will avoid "instant sainthood."
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One More Day
Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose.
– Lyndon B. Johnson
We can cherish our yesterdays or even regret them, but we can never live them again. The past is behind us; the future lies ahead. We may sometimes be saddened by the thought that the furture might be shorter than our past, but we find comfort in remembering that the future is real and promising; the past is neither.
To find only positives in the past and negatives in the future robs us of one of our greatest gifts — time — and time is what the past can’t give us. Yesterday’s gifts to us are memories, and an occasional backward glance to what once was is natural. But we grow mentally and spiritually by living in this day and planning for tomorrow.
I accept the gifts of yesterday’s memories, today’s reality, and tomorrow’s dreams.
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Food For Thought
Food Is Not Home
Breaking abstinence may be an attempt to go home emotionally. Since we associate food, and especially certain foods, with early experience, we may turn to food when we crave the emotional support of home.
Perhaps our early home life did not provide the emotional support and security we needed, causing us to attach a false significance to the food, which we were given. The habit of turning to food and eating as a substitute for love, acceptance, and security may be deeply ingrained in our psyche. We may have come to depend on food instead of people to satisfy our emotional needs.
The problem is, of course, that food is not a satisfactory substitute for love and acceptance. However much we eat, the emotional satisfaction will be only temporary and soon disintegrate into despair and self-hatred. The home we crave can best be built here and now by working the OA program and loving the people our Higher Power gives us to love today.
May I realize that food is not home.
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One Day At A Time
Home
“My home is not a place, it is people.”
Lois McMaster Bujold
I’ve spent most of my adult life feeling very alone in the world. My disease of compulsive overeating separated me from others due to my isolation, embarrassment and shame. I was always the outsider looking in at others.
It wasn't until I walked into a twelve step meeting that I found a home for myself. Here these people knew me, heck they WERE me. Whatever I thought, whatever I felt, and whatever I had done in my life, so had others in OA. I am accepted in my totality. OA is the only place where I feel truly safe and at home. I am not alone anymore. The entire twelve step fellowship is on my side ~ and what a great feeling that is!
One day at a time...
I will make OA my home.
~ Cindi L.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Imagine life without faith! were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldn't be life. But we believed in life - of course we did. We could not prove life in the sense that you can prove a straight line is the shortest distance between two points, yet, there it was. Could we still say the whole thing was nothing but a mass of electrons, created out of nothing, meaning nothing, whirling on to a destiny of nothingness? Of course we couldn't. The electrons themselves seemed more intelligent than that. At least, so the chemist said. - Pg. 54 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Slogans seem silly but they are important tools: first things first; one day at a time; kiss. We say them frequently because we need to burn them into our thoughts. Slogans are not 'fillers' for reluctant speakers. They embody important principles necessary to our path of recovery.
With the next slogan I hear, let me really HEAR it, know its importance, and practice it.
Suffering
Today, I will not hide my pain and suffering from myself or from my Higher Power. When I bring my most honest and pure self to the fore and understand my essential powerlessness over situations, when I am truly willing to turn over this angst to a power greater than myself, something changes. I let go and create space for a shift in perception. I experience a quiet awakening in my life, and forces that did not have room to enter are coming in to heal me. It is in letting go that I have a chance of achieving what I desire in my life. Holding on pushes away what I want, while releasing lets it all have enough breathing room so it can stay alive.
I open my heart to my Higher Power.
- Tian Dayton PhD
' Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody... I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.... We must find each other. '
- Mother Teresa
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'Laughter has something in it in common with the ancient winds of faith and inspiration; it unfreezes pride and unwinds secrecy; it makes people forget themselves in the presence of something greater than themselves; something that they cannot resist.' ~G.K. Chesterton
I cannot feel sorry for myself and laugh at the same time, so I take my levity seriously.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
It's not the 'yets' we have to worry about, it's the 'again's.'
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It feels so good to like all of me today. I feel warm and comforted in knowing that I am just fine just the way I am.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
God doesn't need much; whatever we have left is enough.- Anon.
bluidkiti
10-21-2021, 04:12 AM
October 29
Daily Reflections
OUR SURVIVAL
Since recovery from alcoholism is life itself to us, it is imperative that we preserve in full
strength our means of survival.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 177
The honesty expressed by the members of A.A. in meetings has the power to open my
mind. Nothing can block the flow of energy that honesty carries with it. The only obstacle
to this flow of energy is inebriation, but even then, no one will find a closed door if he or
she has left and chooses to return. Once he or she has received the gift of sobriety,
each A.A. member is challenged on a daily basis to accept a program of honesty. My
Higher Power created me for a purpose in life. I ask him to accept my honest efforts to
continue on my journey in the spiritual way of life. I call on Him for strength to know and
seek His will.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
My relationships with my children have greatly improved. Those children who saw me
drunk and were ashamed, those children who turned away in fear and even loathing have
seen me sober and like me, have turned to me in confidence and trust and have forgotten
the past as best they could. They have given me a chance for companionship that I had
completely missed. I am their father or their mother now. Not just "that person the Mom
or Dad married and God knows why." I am a part of my home now. Have I found
something that I had lost?
Meditation For The Day
Our true measure of success in life is the measure of spiritual progress that we have
revealed in our lives. Others should be able to see a demonstration of God's will in our
lives. The measure of His will that those around us have seen worked out in our daily
living is the measure of our true success. We can do our best to be a demonstration each
day of the power of God in human lives, and example of the working out of the grace of
God in the hearts of men and women.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may so live that others will see in me something of the working out of the will
of God. I pray that my life may be a demonstration of what the grace of God can do.
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As Bill Sees It
People Of Faith, p. 300
We who have traveled a path through agnosticism or atheism beg you
to lay aside prejudice, even against organized religion. We have
learned that, whatever the human frailties of various faiths may be,
those faiths have given purpose and direction to millions. People of
faith have a rational idea of what life is all about.
Actually, we used to have no reasonable conception whatever. We
used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and
practices, when we might have seen that many spiritually-minded
persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree
of stability, happiness, and usefulness that we should have sought for
ourselves.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 49
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Walk In Dry Places
Diminishing returns are still beneficial
Getting better.
There's a "Cloud nine" effect that some of us had when we first found sobriety. Some call it the honeymoon stage. It includes a feeling of great joy and relief over having found, at last, an answer to drinking.
This gradually fades away, as it should under normal conditions. We then feel as though we're in stages of diminishing returns, where the benefits The experience we have in getting sober is like that of people who recovery from a terrible physical illness. At first, they feel remarkably better for the first time. But then their recovery becomes taken for granted, and "feeling better" isn't as remarkable as it was when they first recovered.
We should not expect it to be. Instead, we can focus on the contentment and well-being that living sober and steady improvement give us.
I may not have anything today like the excitement that accompanied early recovery. I'll be satisfied with the normal blessings of good living.
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Keep It Simple
Each morning puts a man on trail and each evening passes judgment. Ray L. Smith
In many ways, the Tenth Step is very natural. We continue to take a personal inventory.
And when we’re wrong, we promptly admit it.
At the end of each day we ask ourselves, “How did my day go?” As we think about our day, we bring order to our life. The Tenth Step teaches us about order. It also teaches us how to correct mistakes. We do this by admitting our wrongs. This way, we have no backlog of guilt. It’s good to start each day fresh, free from quilt. Admitting our wrongs is a loving thing to do. It’s another way the program teaches us to love ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Today, I’ll face many choices. Higher Power, be with me as I choose. When the day is done, remind me to think about how I lived today. This will help me learn.
Action for the Day: Tonight, I’ll list three choices I made today. Would I make the same choices again?
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Each Day a New Beginning
Let your tears come. Let them water your soul. --Eileen Mayhew
Letting down our guard, releasing the tension that keeps us taut, often invites our tears, tears that soften us, melt our resistance, reveal our vulnerability, which reminds us that we are only human. So often we need reminding that we are only human.
Perfectionism may be our bane, as it is for so many of us in this program. We've learned to push, push harder, and even harder yet, not only ourselves but also those around us. We must be better, we think, and we tighten our hold on life. The program can teach us to loosen our grip, if we'll let it. The magic is that when we loosen our grip on this day, this activity, this person, we get carried gently along and find that which we struggled to control happening smoothly and naturally. Life is a series of ironies.
We should not hide from our tears. We can trust their need to be present. Perhaps they need to be present for someone else, as well as ourselves. Tears encourage compassion; maybe our assignment in life, today, is to help someone else experience compassion.
My tears will heal. And the wounded are everywhere.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Now, this house will hardly accommodate its weekly visitors, for they number sixty or eighty as a rule. Alcoholics are being attracted from far and near. From surrounding towns, families drive long distances to be present. A community thirty miles away has fifteen fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Being a large place, we think that some day its Fellowship will number many hundreds.*
* Written in 1939.
p. 161
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
When I returned home, I threw myself into A.A. I did ninety meetings in ninety days, got a sponsor, and joined a home group. I did everything that was suggested. I made coffee, took commitments, and got involved with service. I rode the roller coaster of early sobriety; every second was worth it to get where I am today.
p. 326
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and fairly obvious. Using his best judgment of what has been right and what has been wrong, he might make a rough survey of his conduct with respect to his primary instincts for sex, security, and society. Looking back over his life, he can readily get under way by consideration of questions such as these:
When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Did I spoil my marriage and injure my children? Did I jeopardize my standing in the community? Just how did I react to these situations at the time? Did I burn with a guilt that nothing could extinguish? Or did I insist that I was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself? How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on other people? If there was rejection or coldness at home, did I use this as a reason for promiscuity?
pp. 50-51
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"Living just for today relieves the burden of the past and the fear of the future."
--unknown
You can be your best friend or your worst enemy. This is all determined by how you treat
yourself. Do you harshly judge yourself, or do you find yourself without any conviction?
--unknown
Perhaps the reason a person gets upset over a situation is simply because they have
preordained things in their own mind.
--unknown
"Love alone is capable of uniting living beings in such a way as to complete and fulfill
them, for it alone takes them and joins them by what is deepest in themselves."
--Pierre T. De Chardin
"Your past is always going to be the way it was. Stop trying to change it."
--Anonymous
"When thinking won't cure fear, action will."
--W. Clement Stone
A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change.
AA is not something you join, it's a way of life.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RACISM
"I want to be the white man's
brother not his brother-in-law."
-- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Addiction is always about separation, ego, isolation and prejudice. The disease
makes us feel different, "less than" and we cover those feelings with false humility
or we assume an arrogant and bombastic manner. Pride and feelings of inferiority put
us on the defensive. It is not unusual for us to seek a scapegoat for our anger.
Drinking alcoholics can be vindictive and prejudicial in their attitude towards
minorities: Blacks, gays and Jews. It is a strange quirk of circumstance when a minority
seeks to victimize another minority --- because alcoholics are a minority group!
Sobriety is about a change in attitude and behavior. The spiritual acceptance of self
must lead inevitably to the acceptance of others. The false pride and arrogance of our
drinking days must give way to the vulnerable strength of sobriety. Now we are able
to embrace our brother, regardless of color, class or creed.
Lord, teach me to seek You in my fellow man and greet You in the stranger.
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"As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who
trust in Him."
2 Samuel 22:31
"But Peter and the other apostles answered and said: "We ought to obey God rather
than men."
Acts 5:29
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Daily Inspiration
Make more room for love in your life. Lord, may I love myself and what I do, may I love others, and how they better my life, and above all, may I love You more each day.
Peace comes not from having no problems, but from being able to deal with them. Lord, bless me with the confidence and wisdom to grow from life's challenges.
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NA Just For Today
Living In The Now
"Living just for today relieves the burden of the past and the fear of the future."
Basic Text, pp. 90-91
Thoughts of how bad it was - or could be - can consume our hopes for recovery. Fantasies of how wonderful it was - or could be - can divert us from taking action in the real world. That's why, in Narcotics Anonymous, we talk about living and recovering "just for today."
In NA, we know that we can change. We've come to believe that our Higher Power can restore the soundness of our minds and hearts. The wreckage of our past can be dealt with through the steps. By maintaining our recovery, just for today, we can avoid creating problems in the future.
Life in recovery is no fantasy. Daydreams of how great using was or how we can use successfully in the future, delusions of how great things could be, overblown expectations that set us up for disappointment and relapse - all are stripped of their power by the program. We seek God's will, not our own. WE seek to serve others, not ourselves. Our self-centeredness and the importance of how great things could or should be for us disappears. In the light of recovery, we perceive the difference between fantasy and reality.
Just for today: I am grateful for the principles of recovery and the new reality they've given me.
pg. 315
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
There is nothing so moving--not even acts of love or hate--as the discovery that one is not alone. --Robert Ardrey
Our fears are normal. Some of us fear going to a new school and making new friends. Taking an important test causes jitters in the bravest looking person. Maybe staying alone in the house for the first time has you looking under beds and in closets every time you hear a strange noise. Our fears are merely reminders that we've forgotten to let God help us out.
So often we think we're alone, but we never are. We each have a Higher Power just waiting to be relied on. Nothing is too difficult or fearful for us to handle with the help of our Higher Power. When we develop the habit of letting God ease our way, our fears are gone.
Today, which fear can I replace with trust in my Higher Power?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
It is senseless to speak of optimism or pessimism. The only important thing to remember is that if one works well in a potato field, the potatoes will grow. If one works well among men, they will grow. That's reality. The rest is smoke. --Danilo Dolci
We can get so mired in our pessimism and negativity! What is the point in it? We even get committed to our pessimism, and we challenge the world - or God - to give us reason for hope. In our pessimism, we don't notice we have chosen a negative place to stand. Recovery means loosening our grip on negativism. We are then free to do the work we need to do. We can slowly take the risk of believing that positive things will happen too.
Any man can see the results in his own life. When we work well at this program, when we are faithful to it, we do grow. We see this truth in one another's lives. The work is not always easy. We sometimes wish to avoid it or find a reason to not even try. But there is no doubt, when we look around us, that the effort is rewarded with fulfilling lives.
God, please remove pessimism from me so I may continue my work.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Let your tears come. Let them water your soul. --Eileen Mayhew
Letting down our guard, releasing the tension that keeps us taut, often invites our tears, tears that soften us, melt our resistance, reveal our vulnerability, which reminds us that we are only human. So often we need reminding that we are only human.
Perfectionism may be our bane, as it is for so many of us in this program. We've learned to push, push harder, and even harder yet, not only ourselves but also those around us. We must be better, we think, and we tighten our hold on life. The program can teach us to loosen our grip, if we'll let it. The magic is that when we loosen our grip on this day, this activity, this person, we get carried gently along and find that which we struggled to control happening smoothly and naturally. Life is a series of ironies.
We should not hide from our tears. We can trust their need to be present. Perhaps they need to be present for someone else, as well as ourselves. Tears encourage compassion; maybe our assignment in life, today, is to help someone else experience compassion.
My tears will heal. And the wounded are everywhere.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Acceptance
A magical potion is available to us today. That potion is called acceptance.
We are asked to accept many things: ourselves, as we are; our feelings, needs, desires, choices, and current status of being. Other people, as they are. The status of our relationships with them. Problems. Blessings. Financial status. Where we live. Our work, our tasks, our level of performance at these tasks.
Resistance will not move us forward, nor will it eliminate the undesirable. But even our resistance may need to be accepted. Even resistance yields to and is changed by acceptance.
Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible. It is not forever; it is for the present moment.
Acceptance is the magic that makes our present circumstances good. It brings peace and contentment and opens the door to growth, change, and moving forward.
It shines the light of positive energy on all that we have and are. Within the framework of acceptance, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
Acceptance empowers the positive and tells God we have surrendered to the Plan. We have mastered today's lesson, and are ready to move on.
Today, I will accept. I will relinquish my need to be in resistance to my environment and myself. I will surrender. I will cultivate contentment and gratitude. I will move forward in joy by accepting where I am today.
I am becoming open to loving others and letting myself FEEL the love other people have for me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 29
The Best Is Yet to Come
Set yourself free from limitations, limitations you have placed on yourself. Sometimes in life we may begin thinking the best part is over. I’ve done my best work, had my best times. We don’t have to limit ourselves, life or the universe.
You’ve had many great times, visited many interesting places, done excellent work, and had truly memorable experiences. You’ve experienced a lifetime of love– with friends, family members, loved ones. But the best isn’t over. Whether you’re at the end of a particular relationship, task, or part of your journey, the best is not over. It is still to come.
Memories of excellent times are to be cherished. Clinging to them in a way that limits our lives is a different issue. Often, it keeps us from cherishing the present moment and creatively participating in our future.
All endings are inexorably tied to new beginnings. That’s the nature of the journey. It continues to unfold. It builds on itself. It can’t help itself from doing that. Cherish the moments, all of them. You have seen and felt much in life so far. But still, the best is yet to come.
Open to all the journey holds. The universe is abundant. You are ready to be healed, calmed, empowered. You are ready to partake of the banquet of life, again and again. You are ready to take your place in new, creative experiences. There are many places still to see, soul mates yet to meet, lessons to be learned, joys to be experienced.
Transcend your limitations. Open your mind and heart to all that lies ahead. Call it to you often in the quietness of your heart by believing what is true.
The best is yet to come.
*****
more language of letting go
Ask to see what you're being shown
I was in a small shopping center dropping off film to be developed. When I returned to me car, I realized I had locked my keys inside it. Disbelief shortly turned to acceptance. I walked down to the police station, a few doors down. I had locked my purse in the car,too. I didn't have a quarter on me to use the phone.
The police called the automobile club for me. They told me help was on the way. I went outside and sat on the curb. Then I began staring at a small kitchen furnishings store across the street. I stared and stared. Then I decided to go browse for a while, even though I didn't have my purse.
For months I'd been searching all over Southern California looking for a particular brand of pots and pans. I'd almost given up. Although this was a small store, I decided to inquire if they carried that brand.
"Oh, yes," the clerk said. "We sure do."
Sometimes an inconvenient incident is just that-- inconvenient. Sometimes we just need to slow down, come back to earth, and be aware. Sometimes there's something our Higher Power would like us to see. And once in a while that unexpected problem is really a blessing in disguise.
Take interruptions and inconveniences in stride. Instead of being angry, try to be quietly present in your life. Be aware. See if something's being pointed out to you.
God, help me open my eyes to see what you want me to see.
*****
Life’s Scales
Balance by Madisyn Taylor
A balanced lifestyle is simply a state of being in which one has time and energy for obligations and pleasures.
Like pieces of a puzzle, the many different aspects of your being come together to form the person that you are. You work and play, rest and expend energy, commune with your body and soul, exalt in joy, and feel sorrow. Balance is the state that you achieve when all of the aspects of your life and self are in harmony. Your life force flows in a state of equilibrium because nothing feels out of sync. While balance is necessary to have a satisfying, energetic, and joyful life, only you can determine what balance means to you.
Achieving balance requires that you assess what is important to you. The many demands of modern life can push us to make choices that can put us off balance and have a detrimental effect on our habits, relationships, health, and career. In creating a balanced lifestyle, you must ascertain how much time and energy you are willing to devote to the different areas of your life. To do so, imagine that your life is a house made up of many rooms. Draw this house, give each part of your life its own room, and size each room according to the amount of importance you assign to that aspect of your life. You can include family, solitude, activities that benefit others, healthy eating, indulgences, exercise and working on self. You may discover that certain elements of your life take up an inordinate amount of time, energy, or effort and leave you with few resources to nurture the other aspects of your life. You may want to spend less time on these activities and more on the ones that! fulfill you.
A balanced lifestyle is simply a state of being in which one has time and energy for obligations and pleasures, as well as time to live well and in a gratifying way. With its many nuances, balance can be a difficult concept to integrate into your life. Living a balanced existence, however, can help you attain a greater sense of happiness, health, and fulfillment. Published with permission from Daily OM
************************************
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Virtually all of us suffered the defect of pride when we sought help through The Program, the Twelve Steps, and the fellowship of those who truly understood what we felt and where we had been. We learned about our shortcomings — and of pride in particular — and began to replace self-satisfaction with gratitude for the miracle of our recovery, gratitude for the privilege of working with others, and gratitude for God’s gift — which enabled us to turn catastrophe into good fortune. Have I begun to realize that “pride is to character like the attic to the house — the highest part, and generally the most empty…”?
Today I Pray
God, please tell me if I am hanging my shins on my own pride. Luckily for me, The Program has its own built-in check for flaws like this — the clear-eyed vision of the group, which sees in me what I sometimes cannot see myself. May I know that any kind of success has always gone straight to my head, and be watching for it as I begin to reconstruct my confidence.
Today I Will Remember
“Success” can be a setback.
************************************
One More Day
You may talk on all subjects save one, namely, your maladies.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Casual conversations have an unspoken rule: never, never tell about our pain, our misery, our difficulties. Ironically, the stars of social gatherings are often the ones who have just suffered an accident or injury. We show interest and concern for new and obvious problems; we often ignore ongoing ones. A leg cast has glamor; a wheelchair has none.
We can understand this. Human nature finds adventure in broken bones or neck braces. It also finds reassurance because these injuries are temporary and the victim will be as good as new in a matter of weeks. Many people can’t identify with the permanence of chronic illness, but we can educate them about our social concerns without provoking pity.
My life becomes more balanced when I enjoy social activities as social — not medical — events.
************************************
Food For Thought
Truth
Overeating covered up the truth. We fed our illusions with food, which harmed our bodies. The illusions grew bigger and stronger until our minds were fog bound by the illusions instead of illuminated by truth.
Giving up our illusions is frightening and painful, but in the long run it is less difficult than trying to live with them and by them. It is impossible to get rid of our illusions by ourselves. The Higher Power leads us to truth by means of the Twelve Steps and the OA program. Abstinence from compulsive overeating is necessary in order to stop feeding our illusions and let the truth come through.
Knowing the truth sets us free. We no longer have to cling to old dependencies and self-defeating habits. Our Higher Power gives us as much truth as we are willing to work for and accept. We are not overwhelmed, but are gradually able to assimilate the reality of our situation. By accepting reality and refraining from using food as an escape, we are able to live with truth instead of illusions.
Lead me by the Power of truth.
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One Day At A Time
Trial and Error
“Anything worth doing at all is worth doing poorly.”
Joachim de Posada
Imagine my shock the first time I heard this statement, which happened to be in a Twelve Step (OA) meeting. I had been reared in an environment in which anything worth doing at all was worth doing well. In fact, in my world this concept was practiced as if it had religious authority. It was perfectionism given flesh and bones.
Perhaps the idea that “anything worth doing at all is worth doing well” worked for some folks. For me, it was paralyzing. There were many things that I needed to do that I simply could not do well. These included things like trimming the hedge, praying, and making good investment choices. So how did my sick, obsessive-compulsive self respond? Predictably, of course: I just didn't do those things I felt I couldn’t do well. I was rarely willing to take the chance of acting and being wrong, so I did not act at all. Soon I was living a very restricted life -- a life hemmed in by the fear of messing up. I needed to be perfect or just not be at all.
Then I found the program. There I learned that I am human and that making mistakes is part of being human. I even learned that making mistakes is a good thing, because in doing so I have acted. This is a program of action. I learn by acting and by making mistakes. How liberating! How freeing. I can't tell you how much my constricted, warped life began to open up. I acted and did things poorly, and people responded warmly and in a helpful manner. I took their advice and I joined the human race. I now consider this simple concept -- act, even if it means doing a thing poorly -- as one of the greatest gifts of the program. My life is really my life now. Perfectionism occasionally rears its ugly head, but when it does, I simply remember where I came from and then I go ahead and make a mistake and set myself free again.
One day at a time...
Today I will do what I need to do, and I will do it as well as I can. When I make a mistake I will not conclude that I am a mistake. I will accept that I am human and I will ask for help. Perfection has never been a goal of this program and it is not a goal for my life.
~ Pete M.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Hence, we saw that reason isn't everything. Neither is reason, as most of us use it, entirely dependable, though it emanate from our best minds. What about people who proved that man could never fly? - Pgs. - 54-55 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps.
I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit.
Truth
Today, I accept that without truth there is nothing. Truth is the soil out of which sustenance grows and nourishment comes, so that we can move in healthy directions. Lies have no food value and starve my spirit; but truth though it can hurt, has a way of hoeing and tilling the soil so that some new growth can occur. Even though knowing the truth may seem unnecessary somewhere inside, I know it anyway. Bringing truth out into the open gives me a chance to lift the veil of secrecy that has made a wound feel like a dark hole. It allows angst to transform and break into a thousand little somethings that each contain usable and illuminating information that can again nurture health and life.
I am willing to live with truth.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Treat your family like you would a newcomer. Give them the same latitude for mistakes, give them the same love, the same gentleness, the same priority and care. This makes for a well-nourished family.
When I ask 'How can I be of service?' my family is at the head of the line.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The Power behind us is much greater than the problems in front of us.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am becoming open to loving others and letting myself FEEEL the love other people have for me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Worrying is like being in a rocking chair; it gives me something to do but it doesn't get me anywhere. - Anon.
October 29
Daily Reflections
OUR SURVIVAL
Since recovery from alcoholism is life itself to us, it is imperative that we preserve in full
strength our means of survival.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 177
The honesty expressed by the members of A.A. in meetings has the power to open my
mind. Nothing can block the flow of energy that honesty carries with it. The only obstacle
to this flow of energy is inebriation, but even then, no one will find a closed door if he or
she has left and chooses to return. Once he or she has received the gift of sobriety,
each A.A. member is challenged on a daily basis to accept a program of honesty. My
Higher Power created me for a purpose in life. I ask him to accept my honest efforts to
continue on my journey in the spiritual way of life. I call on Him for strength to know and
seek His will.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
My relationships with my children have greatly improved. Those children who saw me
drunk and were ashamed, those children who turned away in fear and even loathing have
seen me sober and like me, have turned to me in confidence and trust and have forgotten
the past as best they could. They have given me a chance for companionship that I had
completely missed. I am their father or their mother now. Not just "that person the Mom
or Dad married and God knows why." I am a part of my home now. Have I found
something that I had lost?
Meditation For The Day
Our true measure of success in life is the measure of spiritual progress that we have
revealed in our lives. Others should be able to see a demonstration of God's will in our
lives. The measure of His will that those around us have seen worked out in our daily
living is the measure of our true success. We can do our best to be a demonstration each
day of the power of God in human lives, and example of the working out of the grace of
God in the hearts of men and women.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may so live that others will see in me something of the working out of the will
of God. I pray that my life may be a demonstration of what the grace of God can do.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
People Of Faith, p. 300
We who have traveled a path through agnosticism or atheism beg you
to lay aside prejudice, even against organized religion. We have
learned that, whatever the human frailties of various faiths may be,
those faiths have given purpose and direction to millions. People of
faith have a rational idea of what life is all about.
Actually, we used to have no reasonable conception whatever. We
used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and
practices, when we might have seen that many spiritually-minded
persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree
of stability, happiness, and usefulness that we should have sought for
ourselves.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 49
************************************************** *********
Walk In Dry Places
Diminishing returns are still beneficial
Getting better.
There's a "Cloud nine" effect that some of us had when we first found sobriety. Some call it the honeymoon stage. It includes a feeling of great joy and relief over having found, at last, an answer to drinking.
This gradually fades away, as it should under normal conditions. We then feel as though we're in stages of diminishing returns, where the benefits The experience we have in getting sober is like that of people who recovery from a terrible physical illness. At first, they feel remarkably better for the first time. But then their recovery becomes taken for granted, and "feeling better" isn't as remarkable as it was when they first recovered.
We should not expect it to be. Instead, we can focus on the contentment and well-being that living sober and steady improvement give us.
I may not have anything today like the excitement that accompanied early recovery. I'll be satisfied with the normal blessings of good living.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
Each morning puts a man on trail and each evening passes judgment. Ray L. Smith
In many ways, the Tenth Step is very natural. We continue to take a personal inventory.
And when we’re wrong, we promptly admit it.
At the end of each day we ask ourselves, “How did my day go?” As we think about our day, we bring order to our life. The Tenth Step teaches us about order. It also teaches us how to correct mistakes. We do this by admitting our wrongs. This way, we have no backlog of guilt. It’s good to start each day fresh, free from quilt. Admitting our wrongs is a loving thing to do. It’s another way the program teaches us to love ourselves.
Prayer for the Day: Today, I’ll face many choices. Higher Power, be with me as I choose. When the day is done, remind me to think about how I lived today. This will help me learn.
Action for the Day: Tonight, I’ll list three choices I made today. Would I make the same choices again?
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Let your tears come. Let them water your soul. --Eileen Mayhew
Letting down our guard, releasing the tension that keeps us taut, often invites our tears, tears that soften us, melt our resistance, reveal our vulnerability, which reminds us that we are only human. So often we need reminding that we are only human.
Perfectionism may be our bane, as it is for so many of us in this program. We've learned to push, push harder, and even harder yet, not only ourselves but also those around us. We must be better, we think, and we tighten our hold on life. The program can teach us to loosen our grip, if we'll let it. The magic is that when we loosen our grip on this day, this activity, this person, we get carried gently along and find that which we struggled to control happening smoothly and naturally. Life is a series of ironies.
We should not hide from our tears. We can trust their need to be present. Perhaps they need to be present for someone else, as well as ourselves. Tears encourage compassion; maybe our assignment in life, today, is to help someone else experience compassion.
My tears will heal. And the wounded are everywhere.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Now, this house will hardly accommodate its weekly visitors, for they number sixty or eighty as a rule. Alcoholics are being attracted from far and near. From surrounding towns, families drive long distances to be present. A community thirty miles away has fifteen fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Being a large place, we think that some day its Fellowship will number many hundreds.*
* Written in 1939.
p. 161
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
When I returned home, I threw myself into A.A. I did ninety meetings in ninety days, got a sponsor, and joined a home group. I did everything that was suggested. I made coffee, took commitments, and got involved with service. I rode the roller coaster of early sobriety; every second was worth it to get where I am today.
p. 326
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and fairly obvious. Using his best judgment of what has been right and what has been wrong, he might make a rough survey of his conduct with respect to his primary instincts for sex, security, and society. Looking back over his life, he can readily get under way by consideration of questions such as these:
When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Did I spoil my marriage and injure my children? Did I jeopardize my standing in the community? Just how did I react to these situations at the time? Did I burn with a guilt that nothing could extinguish? Or did I insist that I was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself? How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on other people? If there was rejection or coldness at home, did I use this as a reason for promiscuity?
pp. 50-51
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"Living just for today relieves the burden of the past and the fear of the future."
--unknown
You can be your best friend or your worst enemy. This is all determined by how you treat
yourself. Do you harshly judge yourself, or do you find yourself without any conviction?
--unknown
Perhaps the reason a person gets upset over a situation is simply because they have
preordained things in their own mind.
--unknown
"Love alone is capable of uniting living beings in such a way as to complete and fulfill
them, for it alone takes them and joins them by what is deepest in themselves."
--Pierre T. De Chardin
"Your past is always going to be the way it was. Stop trying to change it."
--Anonymous
"When thinking won't cure fear, action will."
--W. Clement Stone
A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change.
AA is not something you join, it's a way of life.
***********************************************
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RACISM
"I want to be the white man's
brother not his brother-in-law."
-- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Addiction is always about separation, ego, isolation and prejudice. The disease
makes us feel different, "less than" and we cover those feelings with false humility
or we assume an arrogant and bombastic manner. Pride and feelings of inferiority put
us on the defensive. It is not unusual for us to seek a scapegoat for our anger.
Drinking alcoholics can be vindictive and prejudicial in their attitude towards
minorities: Blacks, gays and Jews. It is a strange quirk of circumstance when a minority
seeks to victimize another minority --- because alcoholics are a minority group!
Sobriety is about a change in attitude and behavior. The spiritual acceptance of self
must lead inevitably to the acceptance of others. The false pride and arrogance of our
drinking days must give way to the vulnerable strength of sobriety. Now we are able
to embrace our brother, regardless of color, class or creed.
Lord, teach me to seek You in my fellow man and greet You in the stranger.
************************************************** *********
"As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who
trust in Him."
2 Samuel 22:31
"But Peter and the other apostles answered and said: "We ought to obey God rather
than men."
Acts 5:29
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
Make more room for love in your life. Lord, may I love myself and what I do, may I love others, and how they better my life, and above all, may I love You more each day.
Peace comes not from having no problems, but from being able to deal with them. Lord, bless me with the confidence and wisdom to grow from life's challenges.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Living In The Now
"Living just for today relieves the burden of the past and the fear of the future."
Basic Text, pp. 90-91
Thoughts of how bad it was - or could be - can consume our hopes for recovery. Fantasies of how wonderful it was - or could be - can divert us from taking action in the real world. That's why, in Narcotics Anonymous, we talk about living and recovering "just for today."
In NA, we know that we can change. We've come to believe that our Higher Power can restore the soundness of our minds and hearts. The wreckage of our past can be dealt with through the steps. By maintaining our recovery, just for today, we can avoid creating problems in the future.
Life in recovery is no fantasy. Daydreams of how great using was or how we can use successfully in the future, delusions of how great things could be, overblown expectations that set us up for disappointment and relapse - all are stripped of their power by the program. We seek God's will, not our own. WE seek to serve others, not ourselves. Our self-centeredness and the importance of how great things could or should be for us disappears. In the light of recovery, we perceive the difference between fantasy and reality.
Just for today: I am grateful for the principles of recovery and the new reality they've given me.
pg. 315
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
There is nothing so moving--not even acts of love or hate--as the discovery that one is not alone. --Robert Ardrey
Our fears are normal. Some of us fear going to a new school and making new friends. Taking an important test causes jitters in the bravest looking person. Maybe staying alone in the house for the first time has you looking under beds and in closets every time you hear a strange noise. Our fears are merely reminders that we've forgotten to let God help us out.
So often we think we're alone, but we never are. We each have a Higher Power just waiting to be relied on. Nothing is too difficult or fearful for us to handle with the help of our Higher Power. When we develop the habit of letting God ease our way, our fears are gone.
Today, which fear can I replace with trust in my Higher Power?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
It is senseless to speak of optimism or pessimism. The only important thing to remember is that if one works well in a potato field, the potatoes will grow. If one works well among men, they will grow. That's reality. The rest is smoke. --Danilo Dolci
We can get so mired in our pessimism and negativity! What is the point in it? We even get committed to our pessimism, and we challenge the world - or God - to give us reason for hope. In our pessimism, we don't notice we have chosen a negative place to stand. Recovery means loosening our grip on negativism. We are then free to do the work we need to do. We can slowly take the risk of believing that positive things will happen too.
Any man can see the results in his own life. When we work well at this program, when we are faithful to it, we do grow. We see this truth in one another's lives. The work is not always easy. We sometimes wish to avoid it or find a reason to not even try. But there is no doubt, when we look around us, that the effort is rewarded with fulfilling lives.
God, please remove pessimism from me so I may continue my work.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Let your tears come. Let them water your soul. --Eileen Mayhew
Letting down our guard, releasing the tension that keeps us taut, often invites our tears, tears that soften us, melt our resistance, reveal our vulnerability, which reminds us that we are only human. So often we need reminding that we are only human.
Perfectionism may be our bane, as it is for so many of us in this program. We've learned to push, push harder, and even harder yet, not only ourselves but also those around us. We must be better, we think, and we tighten our hold on life. The program can teach us to loosen our grip, if we'll let it. The magic is that when we loosen our grip on this day, this activity, this person, we get carried gently along and find that which we struggled to control happening smoothly and naturally. Life is a series of ironies.
We should not hide from our tears. We can trust their need to be present. Perhaps they need to be present for someone else, as well as ourselves. Tears encourage compassion; maybe our assignment in life, today, is to help someone else experience compassion.
My tears will heal. And the wounded are everywhere.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Acceptance
A magical potion is available to us today. That potion is called acceptance.
We are asked to accept many things: ourselves, as we are; our feelings, needs, desires, choices, and current status of being. Other people, as they are. The status of our relationships with them. Problems. Blessings. Financial status. Where we live. Our work, our tasks, our level of performance at these tasks.
Resistance will not move us forward, nor will it eliminate the undesirable. But even our resistance may need to be accepted. Even resistance yields to and is changed by acceptance.
Acceptance is the magic that makes change possible. It is not forever; it is for the present moment.
Acceptance is the magic that makes our present circumstances good. It brings peace and contentment and opens the door to growth, change, and moving forward.
It shines the light of positive energy on all that we have and are. Within the framework of acceptance, we figure out what we need to do to take care of ourselves.
Acceptance empowers the positive and tells God we have surrendered to the Plan. We have mastered today's lesson, and are ready to move on.
Today, I will accept. I will relinquish my need to be in resistance to my environment and myself. I will surrender. I will cultivate contentment and gratitude. I will move forward in joy by accepting where I am today.
I am becoming open to loving others and letting myself FEEL the love other people have for me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 29
The Best Is Yet to Come
Set yourself free from limitations, limitations you have placed on yourself. Sometimes in life we may begin thinking the best part is over. I’ve done my best work, had my best times. We don’t have to limit ourselves, life or the universe.
You’ve had many great times, visited many interesting places, done excellent work, and had truly memorable experiences. You’ve experienced a lifetime of love– with friends, family members, loved ones. But the best isn’t over. Whether you’re at the end of a particular relationship, task, or part of your journey, the best is not over. It is still to come.
Memories of excellent times are to be cherished. Clinging to them in a way that limits our lives is a different issue. Often, it keeps us from cherishing the present moment and creatively participating in our future.
All endings are inexorably tied to new beginnings. That’s the nature of the journey. It continues to unfold. It builds on itself. It can’t help itself from doing that. Cherish the moments, all of them. You have seen and felt much in life so far. But still, the best is yet to come.
Open to all the journey holds. The universe is abundant. You are ready to be healed, calmed, empowered. You are ready to partake of the banquet of life, again and again. You are ready to take your place in new, creative experiences. There are many places still to see, soul mates yet to meet, lessons to be learned, joys to be experienced.
Transcend your limitations. Open your mind and heart to all that lies ahead. Call it to you often in the quietness of your heart by believing what is true.
The best is yet to come.
*****
more language of letting go
Ask to see what you're being shown
I was in a small shopping center dropping off film to be developed. When I returned to me car, I realized I had locked my keys inside it. Disbelief shortly turned to acceptance. I walked down to the police station, a few doors down. I had locked my purse in the car,too. I didn't have a quarter on me to use the phone.
The police called the automobile club for me. They told me help was on the way. I went outside and sat on the curb. Then I began staring at a small kitchen furnishings store across the street. I stared and stared. Then I decided to go browse for a while, even though I didn't have my purse.
For months I'd been searching all over Southern California looking for a particular brand of pots and pans. I'd almost given up. Although this was a small store, I decided to inquire if they carried that brand.
"Oh, yes," the clerk said. "We sure do."
Sometimes an inconvenient incident is just that-- inconvenient. Sometimes we just need to slow down, come back to earth, and be aware. Sometimes there's something our Higher Power would like us to see. And once in a while that unexpected problem is really a blessing in disguise.
Take interruptions and inconveniences in stride. Instead of being angry, try to be quietly present in your life. Be aware. See if something's being pointed out to you.
God, help me open my eyes to see what you want me to see.
*****
Life’s Scales
Balance by Madisyn Taylor
A balanced lifestyle is simply a state of being in which one has time and energy for obligations and pleasures.
Like pieces of a puzzle, the many different aspects of your being come together to form the person that you are. You work and play, rest and expend energy, commune with your body and soul, exalt in joy, and feel sorrow. Balance is the state that you achieve when all of the aspects of your life and self are in harmony. Your life force flows in a state of equilibrium because nothing feels out of sync. While balance is necessary to have a satisfying, energetic, and joyful life, only you can determine what balance means to you.
Achieving balance requires that you assess what is important to you. The many demands of modern life can push us to make choices that can put us off balance and have a detrimental effect on our habits, relationships, health, and career. In creating a balanced lifestyle, you must ascertain how much time and energy you are willing to devote to the different areas of your life. To do so, imagine that your life is a house made up of many rooms. Draw this house, give each part of your life its own room, and size each room according to the amount of importance you assign to that aspect of your life. You can include family, solitude, activities that benefit others, healthy eating, indulgences, exercise and working on self. You may discover that certain elements of your life take up an inordinate amount of time, energy, or effort and leave you with few resources to nurture the other aspects of your life. You may want to spend less time on these activities and more on the ones that! fulfill you.
A balanced lifestyle is simply a state of being in which one has time and energy for obligations and pleasures, as well as time to live well and in a gratifying way. With its many nuances, balance can be a difficult concept to integrate into your life. Living a balanced existence, however, can help you attain a greater sense of happiness, health, and fulfillment. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Virtually all of us suffered the defect of pride when we sought help through The Program, the Twelve Steps, and the fellowship of those who truly understood what we felt and where we had been. We learned about our shortcomings — and of pride in particular — and began to replace self-satisfaction with gratitude for the miracle of our recovery, gratitude for the privilege of working with others, and gratitude for God’s gift — which enabled us to turn catastrophe into good fortune. Have I begun to realize that “pride is to character like the attic to the house — the highest part, and generally the most empty…”?
Today I Pray
God, please tell me if I am hanging my shins on my own pride. Luckily for me, The Program has its own built-in check for flaws like this — the clear-eyed vision of the group, which sees in me what I sometimes cannot see myself. May I know that any kind of success has always gone straight to my head, and be watching for it as I begin to reconstruct my confidence.
Today I Will Remember
“Success” can be a setback.
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One More Day
You may talk on all subjects save one, namely, your maladies.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Casual conversations have an unspoken rule: never, never tell about our pain, our misery, our difficulties. Ironically, the stars of social gatherings are often the ones who have just suffered an accident or injury. We show interest and concern for new and obvious problems; we often ignore ongoing ones. A leg cast has glamor; a wheelchair has none.
We can understand this. Human nature finds adventure in broken bones or neck braces. It also finds reassurance because these injuries are temporary and the victim will be as good as new in a matter of weeks. Many people can’t identify with the permanence of chronic illness, but we can educate them about our social concerns without provoking pity.
My life becomes more balanced when I enjoy social activities as social — not medical — events.
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Food For Thought
Truth
Overeating covered up the truth. We fed our illusions with food, which harmed our bodies. The illusions grew bigger and stronger until our minds were fog bound by the illusions instead of illuminated by truth.
Giving up our illusions is frightening and painful, but in the long run it is less difficult than trying to live with them and by them. It is impossible to get rid of our illusions by ourselves. The Higher Power leads us to truth by means of the Twelve Steps and the OA program. Abstinence from compulsive overeating is necessary in order to stop feeding our illusions and let the truth come through.
Knowing the truth sets us free. We no longer have to cling to old dependencies and self-defeating habits. Our Higher Power gives us as much truth as we are willing to work for and accept. We are not overwhelmed, but are gradually able to assimilate the reality of our situation. By accepting reality and refraining from using food as an escape, we are able to live with truth instead of illusions.
Lead me by the Power of truth.
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One Day At A Time
Trial and Error
“Anything worth doing at all is worth doing poorly.”
Joachim de Posada
Imagine my shock the first time I heard this statement, which happened to be in a Twelve Step (OA) meeting. I had been reared in an environment in which anything worth doing at all was worth doing well. In fact, in my world this concept was practiced as if it had religious authority. It was perfectionism given flesh and bones.
Perhaps the idea that “anything worth doing at all is worth doing well” worked for some folks. For me, it was paralyzing. There were many things that I needed to do that I simply could not do well. These included things like trimming the hedge, praying, and making good investment choices. So how did my sick, obsessive-compulsive self respond? Predictably, of course: I just didn't do those things I felt I couldn’t do well. I was rarely willing to take the chance of acting and being wrong, so I did not act at all. Soon I was living a very restricted life -- a life hemmed in by the fear of messing up. I needed to be perfect or just not be at all.
Then I found the program. There I learned that I am human and that making mistakes is part of being human. I even learned that making mistakes is a good thing, because in doing so I have acted. This is a program of action. I learn by acting and by making mistakes. How liberating! How freeing. I can't tell you how much my constricted, warped life began to open up. I acted and did things poorly, and people responded warmly and in a helpful manner. I took their advice and I joined the human race. I now consider this simple concept -- act, even if it means doing a thing poorly -- as one of the greatest gifts of the program. My life is really my life now. Perfectionism occasionally rears its ugly head, but when it does, I simply remember where I came from and then I go ahead and make a mistake and set myself free again.
One day at a time...
Today I will do what I need to do, and I will do it as well as I can. When I make a mistake I will not conclude that I am a mistake. I will accept that I am human and I will ask for help. Perfection has never been a goal of this program and it is not a goal for my life.
~ Pete M.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Hence, we saw that reason isn't everything. Neither is reason, as most of us use it, entirely dependable, though it emanate from our best minds. What about people who proved that man could never fly? - Pgs. - 54-55 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps.
I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit.
Truth
Today, I accept that without truth there is nothing. Truth is the soil out of which sustenance grows and nourishment comes, so that we can move in healthy directions. Lies have no food value and starve my spirit; but truth though it can hurt, has a way of hoeing and tilling the soil so that some new growth can occur. Even though knowing the truth may seem unnecessary somewhere inside, I know it anyway. Bringing truth out into the open gives me a chance to lift the veil of secrecy that has made a wound feel like a dark hole. It allows angst to transform and break into a thousand little somethings that each contain usable and illuminating information that can again nurture health and life.
I am willing to live with truth.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Treat your family like you would a newcomer. Give them the same latitude for mistakes, give them the same love, the same gentleness, the same priority and care. This makes for a well-nourished family.
When I ask 'How can I be of service?' my family is at the head of the line.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The Power behind us is much greater than the problems in front of us.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am becoming open to loving others and letting myself FEEEL the love other people have for me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Worrying is like being in a rocking chair; it gives me something to do but it doesn't get me anywhere. - Anon.
bluidkiti
10-21-2021, 04:12 AM
October 30
Daily Reflections
LIVE AND LET LIVE
Never since it began has Alcoholics Anonymous been divided by a major controversial
issue. Nor has our Fellowship ever publicly taken sides on any question in an embattled
world. This, however, has been no earned virtue. It could almost be said that we were
born with it. . . . "So long as we don't argue these matters privately, it's a cinch we never
shall publicly. "
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 176
Do I remember that I have a right to my opinion but that others don't have to share it?
That's the spirit of "Live and Let Live." The Serenity Prayer reminds me, with God's
help, to "Accept the things I cannot change." Am I still trying to change others? When it
comes to "Courage to change the things I can," do I remember that my opinions
are mine, and yours are yours? Am I still afraid to be me? When it comes to "Wisdom
to know the difference," do I remember that my opinions come from my experience?
If I have a know-it-all attitude, aren't I being deliberately controversial?
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I have real friends, where I had none before. My drinking companions could hardly be
called my real friends, though when drunk we seemed to have the closest kind of
friendship. My idea of friendship has changed. Friends are no longer people whom I can
use for my own pleasure or profit. Friends are now people who understand me and I them,
whom I can help and who can help me to live a better life. I have learned not to hold back
and wait for friends to come to me, but to go half way and to be met half way, openly and
freely. Does friendship have new meaning for me?
Meditation For The Day
There is a time for everything. We should learn to wait patiently until the right time
comes. Easy does it. We waste our energies in trying to get things before we are ready to
have them, before we have earned the right to receive them. A great lesson we have to
learn is how to wait with patience. We can believe that all our life is a preparation for
something better to come when we have earned the right to it. We can believe that God
has a plan for our lives and that this plan will work out in the fullness of time.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may learn the lesson of waiting patiently. I pray that I may not expect things
until I have earned the right to have them.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
To Rebuild Security, p. 301
In our behavior respecting financial and emotional security, fear.
greed. possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst.
Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can
ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what
character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and
inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill
me with conflict? Or did I overvalue myself and play the big shot?
Businesswomen in A.A. will find that these questions often apply to
them, too, and the alcoholic housewife can also make the family
financially insecure. Indeed, all alcoholics need to cross-examine
themselves ruthlessly to determine how their own personality defects
have demolished their security.
12 & 12, pp. 51-52
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Walk In Dry Places
Who is a winner?
Staying Sober
Newcomers in AA are urged to "stick with the winners." But who is a winner?
A winner in AA is one who finds sobriety and represents principles that help others find and maintain sobriety. Any person who can help others is a winner.
The losers are people who don't make enough of a commitment to find and maintain sobriety. It may not be their fault. On the other hand, some losers eventually become winners.
It is not our purpose to apply ratings to various individuals, whether they're winner or losers. We must know, however, that we cannot benefit from the suggestions of people who do not stay sober. We are looking for the path of recovery, not the road to ruin. The winners are people who can help us in our recovery.
I'll spend as much time as possible with people who want to stay sober. I have no intention of joining anyone on the road to ruin.
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Keep It Simple
The universe is full of magical things waiting for our wits to grow sharper.
---Eden Phillpots
How nice to have the fog lifted! Sobriety lets our wits grow sharper. We can go after our dreams and ideas. We can listen to music and sing. We are part of the magic of the universe. At times we may not feel very magical, but we are. Our spirits hold much magic. Sobriety is magic. We work at making the world a better place. In doing so, we get magical powers. Power that heals and comfort others. Power that heals and comforts others. Powers to understand things that before we could not. Powers that let us see the world as we’ve never seen it. Enjoy the magic and use your powers wisely!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, let Your magic enter and fill my heart.
Action for the Day: I’ll list four magical powers I have from being sober.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Intuition is a spiritual faculty and does not explain, but simply points the way. --Florence Scovel Shinn
Should we make this move? Should we change jobs? Should we talk to others about our feelings? We are seldom short on prayers when we're filled with fear and indecision. We are, however, short on answers. Our worries block them out.
No prayer ever goes unanswered. Of this we can be certain. On the other hand, the answer may not be what we'd hoped for. In fact, we may not recognize it as the answer because we are expecting something quite different. It takes willingness on our part to be free of our preconceptions--free to accept whatever answers are offered.
Our answers come unexpectedly, a chance meeting on the street, a passage in a book or newspaper, a nagging feeling within. God speaks to each of us throughout the day. Our prayers are answered, our problems find solutions, and our worries are eased, if we but attune ourselves to the messages. They are all around.
I will be attentive to all the signs from God today. Whatever answer I seek is finding its way to me.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
But life among Alcoholics Anonymous is more than attending gatherings and visiting hospitals. Cleaning up old scrapes, helping to settle family differences, explaining the disinherited son to his irate parents, lending money and securing jobs for each other, when justified—these are everyday occurrences. No one is too discredited or has sunk too low to be welcomed cordially—if he means business. Social distinctions, petty rivalries and jealousies—these are laughed out of countenance. Being wrecked in the same vessel, being restored and united under one God, with hearts and minds attuned to the welfare of others, the things which matter so much to some people no longer signify much to them. How could they?
p. 161
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
It is very important to my recovery to study and work the Steps. To this day, I still make at least two Step meetings a week. I have a sponsor who guides me through the Steps gently but firmly, with a sure-handedness I hope I am able to emulate with the two women I now sponsor. The Promises have begun to materialize for me, and there's still so much work to do.
pp. 326-327
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Also of importance for most alcoholics are the questions they must ask about their behavior respecting financial and emotional security. In these areas fear, greed, possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst. Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill me with conflict? Did I try to cover up those feelings of inadequacy by bluffing, cheating, lying, or evading responsibility? Or by griping that others failed to recognize my truly exceptional abilities? Did I overvalue myself and play the big shot? Did I have such unprincipled ambition that I double-crossed and undercut my associates? Was I extravagant? Did I recklessly borrow money, caring little whether it was repaid or not? Was I a pinch penny, refusing to support my family properly? Did I cut corners financially? What about the "quick money" deals, the stock market, and the races?
p. 51
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"Wherever you may be, look when there is apparently nothing to see, listen when all is
seemingly quiet."
--unknown
"There is no investment you can make which will pay you so well as the effort to
scatter sunshine and good cheer through your establishment."
--Orison Swett Marden
God seldom becomes a reality until God becomes a necessity.
--unknown
G I F T = God Is Forever There.
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.
--unknown
A well-spent day brings happy sleep.
--Leonardo da Vinci
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FOOD
"Seeing is deceiving. It's eating
that's believing."
-- James Thurber
It may seem strange to many but for years my belief system revolved around my
eating. I believed that if I could eat I would be okay. Food for me was both the
pleasure and escape. I lived to eat. Feelings, good and bad, were surrounded and
stuffed down with food. Some people drank to hide, used cocaine to escape --- I ate to
avoid the problems in my life.
Seeing was deceiving for me because I refused to accept the reality of my eating. I
covered myself with clothes, avoided the beach, rarely looked at my body. I saw only
what I wanted to see --- and I was dying. Now I choose to face reality. This for me is
the meaning of spirituality. I choose to show my love for me by loving my food,
making choices around what I eat and eating slowly. Today I choose to talk about my
problems, rather than eat them.
God, help me to accept my daily bread with gratitude and abstinence.
************************************************** *********
And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him
in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being
strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great
endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to
share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.
Colossians 1:10-12
For mortals it is impossible, but not for God; for God all things are possible.
Mark 10:27
Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those
who mistreat you.
Luke 6:27-28
Do not expect that your decision to forgive will result in major changes in the other
persons. Instead, pray for them.
Matthew 5:44
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Daily Inspiration
Be inspired to try something new and much of what you dream can become your life. Lord, thank you for giving me the freedom of choice, and grant me the courage to experience my opportunities and create new ones.
Worse than being a quitter is the one who is afraid to begin. Lord, grant me the courage to believe in myself and the ability to focus on what I can do, not what I can't do.
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NA Just For Today
Courage
"Our newly found faith serves as a firm foundation for courage in the future."
Basic Text, p.93
Narcotics Anonymous is no place for the faint of heart! Facing life on life's terms without the use of drugs isn't always easy. Recovery requires more than hard work; it requires a liberal dose of courage.
What is courage, anyway? A quick look at a dictionary will tell us. We have courage when we face and deal with anything that we think of as difficult, dangerous, or painful, rather than withdrawing from it. Courage means being brave; having a purpose; having spirit. So what is courage, really? Courage is an attitude, one of perseverance.
That's what an addict in recovery really needs - perseverance. We make that commitment to stick with our program, to avoid using, no matter what happens. A courageous addict is one who doesn't use, one day at a time, no matter what. And what gives us courage? A relationship with a Higher Power gives us the strength and the courage to stay clean. We know that, so long as we are in our God's care, we will have the power we need to face life on its own terms.
Just for today: I have a Higher Power who cares for me, no matter what. Knowing that, I will strive to have an attitude of courage today.
pg. 316
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
You have three choices: keep on fighting, ignore each other, or make up and be friends. --John Knoblauch
Once there were four sixth-graders--two boys and two girls--who started to fight even though they'd been friends for years. One morning at the bus stop, the boys started playing keep-away with the girls' shoes and wouldn't give them back. One of the mothers called the school.
Later that day, the counselor called them in and asked them what the fight was all about. They said they didn't really know.
"Well," said the counselor, "it doesn't really matter why you started fighting. Right now, you've got three choices: keep on fighting, ignore each other, or make up."
The group chose to ignore each other, after discussing it among themselves. They were happy to be able to stop fighting. About the time of winter vacation, they decided to be friends again.
What conflicts can I resolve by letting them be?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
That which is lacking in the present world is a profound knowledge of the nature of things. --Frithjof Schuon
Most of us have very narrow, limited ways of understanding what happens to us. We are generally practical men, and if something goes wrong we immediately begin to think of how to fix it. We take a cause-and-effect approach to understand the events around us rather than a circular or symbolic approach. Perhaps we turn quickly to blaming instead of asking what is the meaning or the message in what is happening. We see our own experience as the center of events. We forget that our lives are only today's expression in a line of generations before us.
We become too self-satisfied with our ways of understanding the world. It may be comforting to think we understand what is going on. When we let go of that comfort and open ourselves to a more profound awareness, we enter the spiritual realm. Here we learn that facts are not enough to achieve truth. We begin to understand that love - in the form of connections with all of creation - is where we find the most profound meaning.
I am a part of the whole universe, and my relationship with my Higher Power will open me to profound knowledge.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Intuition is a spiritual faculty and does not explain, but simply points the way. --Florence Scovel Shinn
Should we make this move? Should we change jobs? Should we talk to others about our feelings? We are seldom short on prayers when we're filled with fear and indecision. We are, however, short on answers. Our worries block them out.
No prayer ever goes unanswered. Of this we can be certain. On the other hand, the answer may not be what we'd hoped for. In fact, we may not recognize it as the answer because we are expecting something quite different. It takes willingness on our part to be free of our preconceptions--free to accept whatever answers are offered.
Our answers come unexpectedly, a chance meeting on the street, a passage in a book or newspaper, a nagging feeling within. God speaks to each of us throughout the day. Our prayers are answered, our problems find solutions, and our worries are eased, if we but attune ourselves to the messages. They are all around.
I will be attentive to all the signs from God today. Whatever answer I seek is finding its way to me.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Self Value
We have a real life of our own. Yes, we do.
That empty feeling, that senses that everyone except us has a life - an important life, a valuable life, a better life - is a remnant from the past. It is also a self-defeating belief that is inaccurate.
We are real. So is our life. Jump into it, and we'll see.
Today, I will live my life and treasure it as mine.
Today my happiness radiates from within me. Gary Seidler --Ruth Fishel
*****
Journey to the Heart
Honor the Seasons of Your Soul
There are seasons and cycles in our lives, just as there are seasons and cycles to nature, to all of life. We move imperceptibly from one to the other--learning, growing, laughing, and crying along the way.
We accept with joy the seasons of nature. We honor them. We wouldn't think of pulling at the tiny blades of grass in early spring to force their growth. Neither would we chastise them for growing too slowly or wilting with the first frost of autumn.
We can learn to recognize and honor the seasons and cycles in ourselves. The answers will come-- small glimpses ar first, like the first tender shoots of grass. We get an idea, a clue, a hint, of what we're about to learn. Then come a series of experiences. Sometimes we immediately see the connection. Sometimes we don't. We go about the business of living our lives.
Then one day, we see. That tiny shoot has become a full-grown blade of grass, a rolling lawn covering the landscape. We see the connections, the lessons-- and we'll honor all the feelings that we had along the way. We're different. We're changed. We're new. A new season has arrived.
And just when we think that the way it is now is the way it will be forever, another season begins. As naturally, as imperceptibly as the last. It, too. will build on what has already happened and create something new.
There are seasons and cycles in us, just as there are in nature. Learn to recognize and honor the seasons and cycles of the soul.
*****
more language of letting go
God's aware of you
Dear God,
Are you really invisible or is that just a trick?
Children's Letters to God
Sometimes we cannot see more than a few feet in front of us along the path. The path is still there. All we have to do is keep walking it until we're out of the darkness and into the Light. Just take one small step at a time.
Surrender to the circumstances in your life. Feel your feelings. Be aware of your pain and your suffering, if that's what you're going through. But remember that even when you can't see God, God can see you.
And God cares.
God, help me feel your active presence in my life today.
*****
A Living Dwelling
Creating a Beautiful Home by Madisyn Taylor
Our conscious, loving intentions can literally transform the spaces in which we live, dispelling any lingering unharmonious energy.
The homes we occupy are seldom ideal. A space that satisfies our basic needs may nonetheless leave us wanting where location, décor, or style are concerned. Yet every home has the potential to be beautiful. When we fill our homes with love, we transcend worldly factors such as market value and design. Our conscious, loving intentions can literally transform the spaces in which we live, dispelling any lingering unharmonious energy and replacing it with an ethereal beauty that is felt rather than seen. Our homes become spiritual dwellings that feel soulful and alive. Regardless of their outward appearances, they radiate love, making all who enter, including ourselves, feel instantly welcome.
Turning a space into the beautiful outward expression of your inner warmth is as easy as projecting love into it. When your intentions are sincere, you can infuse the walls of your home with your energy, your emotional sensitivity, and your generosity of spirit, turning it into a haven of affection, joy, laughter, and togetherness. It is up to you, whether you want your personal spaces to be peaceful and quiet or lively and inspiring. Begin by cultivating awareness within yourself. This will allow you to see your home as an integral part of your existence rather than somewhere you simply return to at the end of each day. Consider how you relate to each element of your space, and remind yourself that every room in your home can serve a purpose in your life and the lives of your loved ones. Finally, lovingly thank each room for providing for your needs. As you become more mindful of the manner in which your home contributes to your well-being, you will discover that, more and ! more, you want to love and be loved by it.
Appearance and other superficial qualities can be deceiving. An aesthetically beautiful home can prove unwelcoming. And a home that seems mundane in every characteristic can be as comforting and cozy as a beloved relative or friend. When you nurture and care for your home as if it were a loved one, it will absorb your tender intentions and project a love so touching you will soon come to feel a great affection for it.
*****
A Day at a Time
Reflection for the Day
When I'm motivated by pride - by bondage of self - I become partly or even wholly blind to my liabilities and shortcomings. At that point, the last thing I need is comfort. Instead, I need an understanding friend in The Program - one who knows "where I'm at" - a friend who'll unhesitatingly chop a hole through the wall my ego has built so that the light of reason can once again shine through.
Do I take time to review my progress, to spot-check myself on a daily basis, and to promptly try to remedy my wrongs?
Today I Pray
God, I pray that the group - or just one friend - will be honest enough to see my slippery manifestations of pride and brave enough to tell me about them. My self-esteem was starved for so long, that with my first successes in The Program, it may swell to the gross proportions of self-satisfaction. May a view from outside myself give me a true picture of how I am handling the triumph of my sobriety - with humility or with pride.
Today I Will Remember
Self-esteem or self-satisfaction?
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One More Day
We can have a hand in our own daily miracle of health.
– Lewis F. Presnall
Some things we cannot change or control, and one of those most certainly is the limiting nature of illnesses. But we’re not alone. We have surely learned by now that all people have to deal with handicaps or limitations — physical, psychological, or emotional. Like all other people, we are challenged to live a fulfilling life within the limitations placed upon us.
What matters most is that even through we may have a long-term health problem, we can learn to dwell on wellness, not on illness. Limitations certainly afect how we live our lives, but they need not alter the quality of who we are. It’s up to us to choose whether we will be all we are intended to be.
There are large areas which I can still control in my life, and that gives me hope.
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Food For Thought
Accent on the Present
When we were obsessed with food, we were often obsessed with the past as well. We would rehash old hurts and resentments, old fears and desires. Our dreams, along with our waking hours, may have been filled with people from our past. Such preoccupation with the past prevented us from focusing on the present.
By realizing that compulsive overeating is a nonstop trip back to the hurts of the past, we become more determined to maintain abstinence. If we are to be alive in the present, we need to let go of the past. What is over is over and cannot be replayed except in our minds.
What we can do is turn our memories over to our Higher Power for healing. The creative Spirit, which is not bound by time, can take away old hurts and resentments. Then we are free to deal with the present and concentrate on doing God's will for us now, today. Living in the present keeps us in touch with the Power, which restores us to sanity.
May I remember that You are always now.
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One Day At A Time
Truth
“The truth that makes men free is for the most part
the truth which men prefer not to hear.”
Herbert Agar
I spent thirty-five years of my adult life running from the truth. It wasn't until I came to OA and began to work through the Twelve Steps that I had enough emotional support to turn and face the truth. What is my truth? I am a food addict.
Once I was able to face and accept that truth, surrender to my Higher Power was immediate. At long last I was free of cravings, free of bingeing, and free of obsessive food thoughts. That freedom allowed me to work toward the goal of becoming the person I had always wanted to be.
The way I see it, I can be an addict in recovery or I can be an addict in hell. I choose recovery.
One day at a time...
I will seek the truth in my life by working the program of recovery.
~ Cindi L.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We reviewed our own conduct over the years past. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, or inconsiderate? Whom had we hurt? Did we unjustifiably arouse jealousy, suspicion or bitterness? Where were we at fault, what should we have done instead? We got all this down on paper and looked at it. - Pg. 69 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
You don't have to worry about your faults now or feel shame. None of us are near perfect, even if we've been clean and sober a long time. We strive for progress, not perfection.
Let me know I don't have to put up a front of perfection, my goal is progress in sobriety.
Healing
Sometimes, healing doesn't feel good. Sometimes, it involves deep pain. The effect of healing is gentle, freeing and wonderful, but the road leading to it can be hellish. Now, I understand what the Psalms mean by, 'valley of the shadow of death.' They were referring to a spiritual enlightenment involving a death and a rebirth. In order to be born into enlightenment, it is necessary that I face and clear out the dark and scary parts of myself. I need all of me for a life of spiritual freedom.
Today, I know that I was never alone along the way, and that I need never feel alone again.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
What you are feeling today is not the way you will always feel. Happy or sad, mad, glad, or bad, the one thing you can always count on is that everything changes.
Even though I resist change, there's no way to progress without it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
When you continually don't like the way people treat you, it is usually because you are cooperating with the treatments.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today my happiness radiates from within me. - Gary Seidler
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Denial isn't a river in Egypt. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
10-24-2021, 02:21 AM
October 31
Daily Reflections
AVOIDING CONTROVERSY
All history affords us the spectacle of striving nations and groups finally torn asunder
because they were designed for, or tempted into, controversy. Others fell apart because
of sheer self-righteousness while trying to enforce upon the rest of mankind some
millennium of their own specification.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 176
As an A.A. member and sponsor, I know I can cause real damage if I yield to temptation
and give opinions and advice on another's medical, marital, or religious problems. I am
not a doctor, counselor, or lawyer. I cannot tell anyone how he or she should live;
however, I can share how I came through similar situations without drinking, and how
A.A.'s Steps and Traditions help me in dealing with my life.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I have more peace and contentment. Life has fallen into place. The pieces of the jigsaw
puzzle have found their correct position. Life is whole, all of one piece. I am not cast
hither and yon on every wind of circumstance or fancy. I am no longer a dry leaf cast
up and away by the breeze. I have found my place of rest, my place where I belong. I am
content. I do not vainly wish for things I cannot have. I have "the serenity to accept the
things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the
difference." Have I found contentment in A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
In all of us there is an inner consciousness that tells of God, an inner voice that speaks to
our hearts. It is a voice that speaks to us intimately, personally, in a time of quiet
meditation. It is like a lamp unto our feet and a light unto your path. We can reach out
into the darkness and figuratively touch the hand of God. As the Big Book puts it: "Deep
down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of God. We can find the
Great Reality deep down within us. And when we find it, it changes our whole attitude
toward life."
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may follow the leading of the inner voice. I pray that I may not turn a deaf
ear to the urging of my conscience.
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As Bill Sees It
Comradeship in Peril, p. 302
We A.A.'s are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after
rescue from shipwreck, when camaraderie, joyousness, and democracy
pervade the vessel from steerage to captain's table.
Unlike the feelings of the ship's passengers, however, our joy in
escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways.
The feeling of sharing in a common peril--relapse into
alcoholism--continues to be an important element in the powerful
cement which binds us of A.A. together.
<< << << >> >> >>
Our first woman alcoholic had been a patient of Dr. Harry Tiebout's,
and he had handed her a prepublication manuscript copy of the Big
Book. The first reading made her rebellious, but the second convinced
her. Presently she came to a meeting held in our living room, and from
there she returned to the sanitarium carrying this classic message to a
fellow patient: "We aren't alone any more."
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 17
2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 18
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Walk In Dry Places
Be still--- for a while, anyhow.
God's will for us.
The bible reminds us: "Be still, and know that I am God." What does this say to the recovering alcoholic who is struggling against a tidal wave of problems?
It must be a reminder that our true place and right work is part of a great purpose, though we may still not know who we fit into the larger plan. We can know, however, that God's plan will include peaceful actions, just and moral solutions, and results that are wholly beneficial to all concerned.
One does not have to be a theologian to decide that staying sober is part of God's will for us. That's why we can expect the support of Higher Power at all times, even when we feel fearful and abused.
Aside from staying sober, each of us will have individual work and responsibilities in life. We should be careful not to measure anyone's success--- including our own--- against worldly standards. If God is in charge, wherever we are and whatever we happen to be doing can a part of the divine will.
In keeping sober today, I'll know that I'm carrying out God's will. I'll also be open to unexpected opportunities to carry out God's directions.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
A man who has committed a mistake and doesn’t correct it is committing another mistake.
---Confucius
Step Ten tell us that when we are wrong, we must “promptly” admit it. We aren’t used to admitting our mistakes. We defend ourselves and blame others. This is call denial.
Denial is bad for two reasons. First, it keeps from learning from our mistakes, so we keep making them. Second, we don’t listen to others, so we close ourselves and become lonely.
What a relief it is to admit our wrongs! We don’t have to keep trying to do things the hard way. We can learn new way to think and act that will work better for us. We can let other people be our teachers.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me out of denial, so I can see the changes I need to make.
Action for the Day: Today, If I disagree with someone, I’ll promptly admit when I’m wrong. If I’m right, I’ll be gentle. I don’t have to prove anything.
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Each Day a New Beginning
It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker
We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptance.
In the past many of us were haunted by fears that our best wasn't good enough. And not infrequently those fears hindered our performance, thus validating our fears. We can slip back into those immobilizing fears if we don't attend, with vigilance, to the program and its suggestions.
Our higher power will help us do whatever task lies before us. And no task will be ours except those for which we've been readied. Our job is simply to go forth, taking God as our partner, and set about completing the task. We will not falter if we remember where our strength rests, where the guidance lies.
Self-esteem is one of the byproducts of a job done with God's help. An additional byproduct is that we learn more quickly to rely on God's direction and strength the next time, thus reducing the time we give to fear.
I can be successful today, in every endeavor, if I let God manage my moves.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 11 - A Vision For You
Under only slightly different conditions, the same thing is taking place in many eastern cities. In one of these there is a well-know hospital for the treatment of alcoholic and drug addiction. Six years ago one of our number was a patient there. Many of us have felt, for the first time, the Presence and Power of God within its walls. We are greatly indebted to the doctor in attendance there, for he, although it might prejudice his own work, has told us of his belief in ours.
pp. 161-162
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Student Of Life
Living at home with her parents, she tried using willpower to beat the obsession to drink. But it wasn't until she met another alcoholic and went to an A.A. meeting that sobriety took hold.
It is almost impossible to adequately describe how much the program has given me, even in just these six short years. I have been financially supporting myself in my own apartment for five years and plan to buy a house next year. I've secured a good job with a promising future--my income has increased more than 150 percent since I got sober.
p. 327
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
Businesswomen in A.A. will naturally find that many of these questions apply to them, too. But the alcoholic housewife can also make the family financially insecure. She can juggle charge accounts, manipulate the food budget, spend her afternoons gambling, and run her husband into debt by irresponsibility, waste, and extravagance.
p. 51
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Let go your memories of a dark past in order to have a bright future.
--unknown
The solution is simple. The solution is spiritual.
--unknown
F A I T H = Fantastic Adventures In Trusting Him.
The greatest gift that you can give yourself is a little bit of your own attention.
--Anthony J. D'Angelo
The best gifts are those which expect no return.
--Norwegian proverb
"The pleasure you get from your life is equal to the attitude you put into it."
--Unknown
One person says, "When I feel far from God, I ask myself: Who moved?" God is always
there. Today I will pray for the wisdom to stay close to my spiritual source, the Creator
Spirit.
--unknown
"If you think you're having a bad day, think again, and again and again and again until
something good comes to mind."
--Rev. Larry Hickey
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SAINTS/SINNERS
"Every saint has a past and
every sinner a future."
-- Oscar Wilde
I must not allow the painful things of my past to affect what I can do today. Guilt is a
killer if I allow it power in my life. I have made my amends. I have apologized to
those I hurt. Today I begin the rest of my life.
Alcoholism produces behavior that causes guilt and shame. In this sense it is
different from so many other diseases. The shame and guilt I felt for years grew out of
my alcoholic behavior and I need to remember that I am not responsible for being
alcoholic. It is not my fault. However, with the knowledge and acceptance of the
disease comes a determination to live responsibly. I have a sense of responsibility in
my recovery. Spirituality involves being a responsible person. The awareness and
acceptance of my past can help create a loving future.
Today I understand that in the failures of the past are sown the seeds of greatness.
************************************************** *********
If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand
will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
Psalm 139 : 9.10
"Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let you heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"
Psalm 27:14
For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.
Philippians 2:13
Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so
doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.
Hebrews 13:1-2
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because
God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with
confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"
Hebrews 13:5-6
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Daily Inspiration
Allow yourself the right to say no when the world asks too much of you. Lord, help me to stay focused on my goals and responsibilites so that I have time for that which is important to me.
Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me.
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NA Just For Today
Our Relationship With A Higher Power
"Ongoing recovery is dependent on our relationship with a loving God who cares for us and will do for us what we find impossible to do for ourselves."
Basic Text, p.96
Working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous gives us a fresh start in life and some guidance for living in the world. But the steps are more than a fresh start. When we do our best to work the steps, we develop a relationship with our personal Higher Power.
In the Third Step, we decide to allow a loving God to influence our lives. Much of the courage, trust, and willingness we need to continue through the succeeding steps comes from this decision. In the Seventh Step, we go even further by asking this Higher Power to change our lives. The Eleventh Step is a way for us to improve the relationship.
Recovery is a process of growth and change in which our lives are renewed. The Twelve Steps are the roadmap, the specific directions we take in order to continue in recovery. But the support we need to proceed with each step comes from our faith in a Higher Power, the belief that all will be well. Faith gives us courage to act. Each step we work is supported by our relationship with a loving God.
Just for today: I will remember that the source of my courage and willingness is my relationship with my Higher Power.
pg. 317
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The only sense that is common in the long run is the sense of change--and we all instinctively avoid it. --E. B. White
Nature reveals to us a world that is always changing. No two sunsets are alike. Winter brings invigorating days while spring brings new buds and blossoms every day. Summer brings lazy warmth and star-filled evenings while fall brings crisp afternoons and a sense of nostalgia.
Even though nature shows us a constantly changing world, we often resist the changes in our own lives. Changes can be both hard and sad, yet they are a part of life. Perhaps we are moving on to a new school or a new neighborhood, or perhaps we are feeling the changes that come with a divorce in the family.
With every change we say a sad goodbye to something old, something familiar--in the same way we feel sadness for summer's end when the first leaves begin to fall. Yet every change also offers us the excitement and potential of a new season--with its own opportunity for new smells, special gifts, and invigorating days.
How have I changed today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Superficiality is the curse of our age. The doctrine of instant satisfaction is a primary spiritual problem. --Richard J. Foster
As we have reached for instant cures, one-minute answers, and quick highs, we have developed lifestyles that foreclosed deeper possibilities. For instance, when we fail to stay and resolve conflicts in a relationship, we miss the joys of a renewed understanding. Our spiritual development comes in steps, small but meaningful increments that build over a period of time. Many of us have not been patient men and our newfound spiritual life is teaching us that the quickest, most efficient answer isn't always best.
Today, our greatest temptation may be to grab for the fast solutions rather than allowing time for small but important steps to occur. When we are frustrated, it will help to remember the difficulty may lie in our insistence on a quick answer. Sometimes simply being true to ourselves and standing as a witness while the answer develops are all that is asked of us.
I will have faith that time is on my side and it will teach me valuable things.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker
We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptance.
In the past many of us were haunted by fears that our best wasn't good enough. And not infrequently those fears hindered our performance, thus validating our fears. We can slip back into those immobilizing fears if we don't attend, with vigilance, to the program and its suggestions.
Our higher power will help us do whatever task lies before us. And no task will be ours except those for which we've been readied. Our job is simply to go forth, taking God as our partner, and set about completing the task. We will not falter if we remember where our strength rests, where the guidance lies.
Self-esteem is one of the byproducts of a job done with God's help. An additional byproduct is that we learn more quickly to rely on God's direction and strength the next time, thus reducing the time we give to fear.
I can be successful today, in every endeavor, if I let God manage my moves.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
All Our Needs
And my God shall supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory... --Phil. 4:19
This verse has helped me many times. It has helped me when I have wondered where my next friend bit of wisdom, insight, or meal was coming from.
Everything I need today shall be supplied to me.
People, jobs, what we have to our immediate disposal, are not our source.
We have tapped into a Greater Source, a source of infinite and immediate supply: God and His Universe.
Our task is to allow ourselves to come into harmony with our Source. Our task is to believe in, and look to, our true Source. Our task is to release fear; negative thinking, limitations, and short supply thinking.
Everything we need shall be provided to us. Let it become a natural response to all situations, and all situations of need.
Reject fear. Reject short supply and limited thinking notions. Be open to abundance.
Cherish need because it is part of our relationship to God and His Universe. God has planned to meet our every need, has created the need within us, so God can supply.
No need is too small or too great. If we care and value our need, God will too.
Our part is taking responsibility for owning the need. Our part is giving the need to the Universe. Our part is letting go, in faith. Our part is giving God permission to meet our needs by believing we deserve to have our needs - and wants - met.
Our part is healthy giving, not out of caretaking, guilt, obligation, and codependency, but out of a healthy relationship with ourselves, God, and all of God's creations.
Our part is simply to be who we are, and love being that.
Today, I will practice the belief that all my needs today shall be met. I will step into harmony with God and His Universe, knowing that I count.
Today I reach out and touch. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey To The Heart
October 31
Something Important Is Happening Now
There’s never a time when nothing is happening.
Something is always taking place. Growth is occurring. We’re evolving, transforming, working things out, incorporating our last lesson, preparing for our next. Something is happening. We just don’t always see it. And that’s how it’s meant to be.
When we see, when we know too much too soon, it’s easy to let our heads get in the way. We think we have to control, have to force, have to make it happen, have to do something.
In a gentle but wise way, the universe takes into account our fears and our natures. It doesn’t let us know too much too soon. It doesn’t spoil the surprise. It doesn’t want us to spoil it either.
Open your heart to the universe. Trust that something is always happening. And often, it’s much different and better than you think.
*****
more language of letting go
Practice awareness of God
I can remember the moment when I was willing to be truly vulnerable with life again. I was walking around in a beach town,talking to my friend. I was talking about my safe little life back in Stillwater, Minnesota, where I though I had everything under control. I had avoided living in big cities and thought small town living would be safe. In that small town, working for its daily newspaper, I had found all the potential held in life. I got that big break that put me, an unknown author, on the New York Times best-seller list. And my son had died. Small town life wasn't as limiting as I feared or as safe as I had hoped.
I told my friend about the time, many years later, I was wandering around the Middle East. I was talking to my daughter on a cell phone. She was on her cell,too, driving through the heart of Los Angeles.
"Aren't you scared over there?" she asked. "Isn't your life in danger?"
Just then a man honked at her. I heard him scream through her window, "If you don't get that car out of the way, I'm going to have you killed."
"Complete safety is an illusion," I said to my friend. "Maybe the only time we're really safe is when we're willing to acknowledge how vulnerable we really are, no matter what we're doing, and be okay with that."
"Ask God to be with me," I said to an older woman who was my mentor at the time.
"Foolish child," she said. "You don't have to ask God to be with you. He's already there, wherever you are."
God, help me feel safe, comfortable, and in your presence wherever I am today.
*****
Five Things
A Self-Esteem Exercise by Madisyn Taylor
Having low self-esteem is a common issue and with some introspection you can start to loosen the grip of this negative thought pattern.
Our primary relationship in life is with our selves. No one else goes through every experience in life with us. We are our one permanent companion, yet we are often our worst critic. To remind ourselves of our magnificence, we can do this exercise: “Five Things I Like About Myself.”
Begin by writing down at least five things that you like about yourself. This is not the time to be modest. If you are having trouble coming up with a total of five items, you know that this exercise can really benefit you. Be sure to include more than your physical attributes on your list, since our bodies are only part of who we are. If you are still struggling with what to include on your list, think of what you like about your favorite people, because these traits are probably qualities that you possess too. Another way to complete your list is to think of five things you don’t like about yourself and find something about these traits that you can like.
Continue this process for a week, thinking of five new things you like about yourself everyday. At the end of the week, read the list aloud to yourself while standing in front of a mirror. Instead of looking for flaws to fix, allow the mirror to reflect your magnificence. You may feel silly about standing in front of a mirror and reading aloud a list of your admirable attributes, but it might just bring a smile to your face and change the way you see yourself. Remember, it is when you feel the most resistant that this exercise can benefit you the most. Because we are constantly looking at the world, instead of looking at ourselves, we don’t often see what’s magnificent about ourselves that others do. When we take the time to experience ourselves the way we would experience someone we love and admire, we become our best companion and supporter on life’s journey. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
If I’m to continue growing in The Program, I must literally “get wise to myself.” I must remember that for most of my life I’ve been terribly self-deceived. The sin of pride has been at the root of most of my self-deception, usually masquerading under the guise of some virtue. I must work continually to uncover pride in all its subtle forms, lest it stop me in my tracks and push me backward once again to the brink of disaster. When it comes to pride, do I believe, in Emerson’s words, that “it is impossible for a man to be cheated by anyone but himself…?”
Today I Pray
May I know that button-popping pride is inappropriate for me as a recovering addict. It hides my faults for me. It turns people off and gets in the way of my helping others. It halts my progress because it makes me think I’ve done enough self-searching and I’m “cured.” I pray to my Higher Power that I may be realistic enough to accept my success in The Program without giving in to pride.
Today I Will Remember
Pride halts progress.
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One More Day
The human body is the best picture of the human soul.
– Ludwig Wittgenstein
As people walk down the street, we can usually spot those with a sense of pride in themselves. How people look is often an indicator of their self-esteem. The changes in our lives challenge us to continue feeling good about ourselves despite stress or diminished health. Any change can be frightening. Unfortunately, sometimes we let problems overtake us, and we begin to look and act like people who feel unwell.
We can take stock of our lives at this time and remember how much we can still do well. We are capable individuals; we can make our own decisions about how we want to conduct our lives. This renewed awareness strengthens our self esteem, and the image we convey to others is one of pride.
There are some things I just cannot change. Today, I will dwell on what I can do for myself.
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Food For Thought
Gifts of the Spirit
Through the OA program, we come to desire spiritual gifts as well as material necessities. Experience shows us that serenity is priceless and something to be desired more than unnecessary food. Courage, wisdom, faith, hope, love, and humility - these are all spiritual gifts, which come to us from our Higher Power as we abstain and work our program.
As we receive these gifts of the spirit, we are able to share them with others. Giving them away to our families and friends ensures that we will receive them more abundantly ourselves. We come to realize that a small gift of time and attention can mean more than an expensive material present.
God's gifts are available to us whenever we are open to receive them. By abstaining from compulsive overeating, we make our spirits ready to accept their rightful gifts.
I pray that I may be ready to accept Your spiritual gifts.
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One Day At A Time
SERVICE
“Service is the rent that you pay for room on this earth.”"
Shirley Chisholm
Midway through my first fourth step someone asked me to sponsor her. I was thrilled and eager to share my experience, strength and hope. As my work with my sponsee progressed, something began to happen in my own program. All that I had learned and was sharing with my sponsee reminded me of where I came from and how far I had progressed. I found that my recovery was strengthened through this process of giving away my experiences in program. This service allowed me to keep what I had received.
It is vital for me that I serve the program of OA in all different manners: as a sponsor; as a leader of a step meeting; as treasurer of a local meeting; and by reaching out to newcomers, people in relapse, and others in the OA fellowship. The more I give, the more I receive.
One day at a time...
I will give service to the OA fellowship so that I may remain in recovery.
~ Cindi L.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
While our literature has preserved the integrity of the A.A. message, sweeping changes in society as a whole are reflected in new customs and practices within the Fellowship. Taking advantage of technological advances, for example, A.A. members with computers can participate in meetings online, sharing with fellow alcoholics across the country or around the world. Fundamentally, though, the difference between an electronic meeting and the home group around the corner is only one of format. - Pg. xxiv - 4th. Ed. - Forward To Fourth Edition
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It doesn't cost a lot of money for us to recover. It costs a lot of time. We have to be diligent and program consciousness from this hour to the next, every hour for the rest of our lives. We 'have' to do it, until we 'want' to do it.
I embrace our program in gratitude.
Resentment Incoherence
The incoherence that results from holding onto resentments and unforgiving attitudes keeps you from being aligned with your true self. It can block you from your next level of quality life experience. Metaphorically, it's the curtain standing between the room you're living in now and a new room, much larger and full of beautiful objects. The act of forgiveness removes the curtain. Clearing up your old accounts can free up so much energy that you jump right into a whole new house. Forgiving releases you from the punishment of a self-made prison where you are both the inmate and the jailer.
- Doc Childre and Howard Martin
submitted by Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
What lies ahead of you and what lies behind you is insignificant compared to what lies within you.
The thing that's so great about recovery today is that no matter where I am, I'm here.
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
What lies ahead of you and what lies behind you is insignificant compared to what lies within you.
The thing that's so great about recovery today is that no matter where I am, I'm here.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Let It Begin With Me
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I reach out and touch.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The meeting was at a church, there was a man standing at the door, he had a tie on and he was handsome. And I thought: 'He must be the minister, now he'll tell me to leave.' And he stuck out his hand and said, 'Welcome.' And I wasn't ready for that; the welcome I got from Alcoholics Anonymous. One drunk relating to another. - Sharon B.
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