roverl0616
06-18-2021, 09:16 AM
I don't know about you but it was killing me to have to know everything. It didn't matter what the topic was, I had to know more about it than anyone else did, and this was of course because I really didn't know anything, and you and I both knew that, but on and on it went into insanity. What a relief it was to find out when I was new in recovery that I didn't have to know everything. That I could replace, with having to know everything, with having a faith. Faith that everything is okay, happening just as it should be. Faith to just accept things just the way they are. None of us know for sure why things happen as they do. They just do, all of this is of course out of our control, always has been, always will be. We don't need to have to think we have to know why, because we really can't know, that isn't possible. By having faith it seems like I know more than I ever did, without really knowing anything. The longer I live the less I know, and yet somehow it all makes more sense to me now than it ever did. One thing for sure is that no one really knows beyond the fact that we are, that we exist, after that the rest is up for grabs.