View Full Version : Daily Recovery Readings - May
bluidkiti
04-22-2021, 11:22 AM
May 1
Daily Reflections
HEALING HEART AND MIND
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being
the exact nature of our wrongs.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55
Since it is true that God comes to me through people, I can
see that by keeping people at a distance I also keep God at
a distance. God is nearer to me than I think and I can
experience Him by loving people and allowing people to love
me. But I can neither love nor be loved if I allow my secrets
to get in the way.
It's the side of myself that I refuse to look at that rules
me. I must be willing to look at the dark side in order to
heal my mind and heart because that is the road to freedom.
I must walk into darkness to find the light and walk into fear
to find peace.
By revealing my secrets - and thereby ridding myself of guilt
- I can actually change my thinking; by altering my thinking,
I can change myself. My thoughts create my future. What I will
be tomorrow is determined by what I think today.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
The A.A. program is one of charity because the real meaning of
the word charity is to care enough about other people to really
want to help them. To get the full benefit of the program, we
must try to help other alcoholics. We may try to help somebody
and think we have failed, but the seed we have planted may bear
fruit some time. We never know the results even a word of ours
might have. But the main thing is to have charity for others,
a real desire to help them, whether we succeed or not. Do I
have real charity?
Meditation For The Day
All material things, the universe, the world, even our bodies,
may be Eternal Thought expressed in time and space. The more
the physicists and astronomers reduce matter, the more it becomes
a mathematical formula, which is thought. In the final analysis,
matter is thought. When Eternal Thought expresses itself within
the framework of space and time, it becomes matter. Our thoughts,
within the box of space and time, cannot know anything firsthand,
except material things. But we can deduce that outside the box of
space and time is Eternal Thought, which we can call God.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be a true expression of Eternal Thought.
I pray that God's thoughts may work through my thoughts.
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As Bill Sees It
We Are Not Fighting, p. 121
We have ceased fighting anything or anyone--even alcohol. For by this
time sanity has returned. We can now react sanely and normally, and
we find that this has happened almost automatically. We see that this
new attitude toward liquor is really a gift of God.
That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding
temptation. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has
been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor
afraid.
That is how we react--so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 84-85
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Walk in Dry Places
Accepting Equal Treatment
Growing Spiritually
One of our AA friends was a district judge in a northern community. On his way to speak at our meeting, he was given a speeding ticket by a state policeman.
"Didn't you tell him you are a judge?" we wanted to know. Smiling sheepishly, he shook his head. It occurred to us, then, that acceptance of the speeding ticket without argument was also an exercise in principles for him. First, he was accepting the same laws he administered to others. Additionally, accepting the ticket was a working of the Tenth Step---". . . and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." Finally, he realized that the ticket may have been a disguised blessing to help him correct a tendency to speed.
As recovering alcoholic, we always function better when we accept such principles in our own lives. Every person is special, yet as part of the human race in general, we must accept the same treatment that is given to others. We can grow spiritually when we accept such equality without resentment or demands for special treatment.
As a human being, I know that today I'm subject to all the things that can happen to human beings. I will not demand or expect privileges that are not available on an equal basis to others.
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Keep It Simple
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.--Step Five
Step Five can be scary. we're to take the wrongs we listed in our Fourth Srep and share them with God, ourselves, and another person. We may look for an easier, softer way. But Step Five stops us.
We're to share the exact nature of our wrong. Why? So we can take a load off ourselves. So we won't use again. By totally sharing our past wrongs, we can belong once more. We can heal. We start to forgive ourselves. We become more humble. When you share your Fifth Step, holding nothing back. You deserve the peace this Step will bring you.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, give me courage to tell it all. Give me courage to admit just how wrong I had become.
Action for the Day: Step Five teaches me that sharing is important. I will find a friend and share my wrongs with that friend. I will hold nothing back.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth
For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs."
We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change.
Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it.
Today, I will have faith, and all will be well.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
When working with a man and his family, you should take care not to participate in their quarrels. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. But urge upon a man’s family that he has been a very sick person and should be treated accordingly. You should warn against arousing resentment or jealousy. You should point out that his defects of character are not going to disappear over night. Show them that he has entered upon a period of growth. Ask them to remember, when they are impatient, the blessed fact of his sobriety.
p. 100
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
In the spring of 1939, the Big Book was printed, and we had two inquiries from the New York office because of a fifteen-minute radio talk that was made. Neither one of the two was interested for himself, one being a mother who wanted to do something for her son. I suggested to her that she should see the son's minister or doctor, and that perhaps he would recommend the A.A. program.
p. 265
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
At first the elders could look only at the objections. "We deal," they said, "with alcoholics only. Shouldn't we sacrifice this one for the sake of the many?" So went the discussions while the newcomer's fate hung in the balance. Then one of the three spoke in a very different voice. "What we are really afraid of," he said, "is our reputation. We are much more afraid of what people might say than the trouble this strange alcoholic might bring. As we've been talking, five short words have been running through my mind. Something keeps repeating to me, "What would the Master do?" "Not another word was said. What more indeed could be said?
p. 142
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"Pay no attention to what the critics say; no statue has ever been put up
to a critic."
--Jean Sibelius
Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much
as we speak.
--Epictetus
One of the most valuable things we can do to heal one another is listen
to each other's stories.
--Rebecca Falls
"Sometimes you have to make music with what you got."
--Izhak Perlman
"Don't just do something, sit there! Sit there long enough each morning to decide what is really important during the day ahead."
--Richard Eyre
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SCRIPTURE
"Nobody ever outgrows
Scriptures; the book widens and
deepens with our years."
--Charles Haddan Spurgeon
Not so long ago I had a narrow and rigid religious outlook that was
based solely on my narrow belief system. I was addicted to my religious
approach and any alternative or variation was condemned before
investigation. I was a religious bigot. I was a hypocrite. I hid behind my
dogma and practiced ritual.
Today I have a comprehensive view of religion and God, thanks to the
influence of recovering alcoholics and the discovery of a spiritual
program. Today I am able to see the depth and richness of scripture, a
living library of books and experiences. Today I am able to see beyond
the printed word to the message of healing and love that comes with
honesty and acceptance. Now I know that the bigoted side of me was
fearful and afraid of change. I needed rules to keep people from
discovering what a lonely and spiritually bereft person I was. The rules
and dogmas formed my prison bars. I was drowning in religiosity. Today
I am free to be different. Today I am free to be me.
O wind of Truth, continue to blow and inspire us through our
differences.
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"O Lord, You are my God. I will exalt You, I will praise Your name,
for You have done wonderful things; Your counsels of old are
faithfulness and truth."
Isaiah 25:1
Forgive your brother from your heart.
Matthew 18:35 NIV
"You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and
surround me with songs of deliverance."
Psalm 32:7
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Daily Inspiration
Do not allow yourself to be disappointed by any thing or any person, but rather have faith that in all things God is leading you to your ultimate good.
Shine brighter than the sun and liken your heart to the flight of a butterfly. Attitude makes a big difference. Lord, help me to change that which I can and appreciate the blessings which I already have received.
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NA Just For Today
Self-Worth And Service
"Being involved in service makes me feel worthwhile."
Basic Text, p. 212
When most of us arrived in Narcotics Anonymous, we had very little self-worth left to salvage. Many members say that they began to develop self-esteem through being of service early in their recovery. Something just short of a miracle occurs when we begin to have a positive impact on others' lives through our service efforts.
Most of us don't have a lot of experience, strength, or hope to share at thirty days clean. In fact, some members will tell us in no uncertain terms that what we can do best is listen. But at thirty days, we do offer something to that addict just coming into the rooms of NA, struggling to get twenty-four hours clean. The very newest NA member, the one with only the desire to stop using and none of the tools, can hardly imagine anyone staying clean for a year, or two years, or ten. But he or she can relate to those people with thirty days clean, picking up a keytag with a look of pride and disbelief emblazoned on their faces.
Service is something that is our unique gift—something that no one can take away from us. We give, and we get. Through service, many of us start on the sometimes long road back to becoming productive members of society.
Just for today: I will be grateful for the opportunity to be of service.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Hold fast to dreams For if dreams die, Life is a broken-winged bird That cannot fly. --Langston Hughes
Watching birds spread their wings and soar can remind us of the best in ourselves. In joyful moments we all feel our own desire to fly, to reach toward what we dream of doing.
Our dreams give us a direction to fly. Birds fly toward the light for joy, toward green leaves for shelter, to water and berries for food. In the same way, our dreams direct us to the course of our own joy, shelter, and nourishment.
Sometimes as we fly, we bump into disappointments. They may temporarily stun us or slow us down. But just like birds that are occasionally wounded, we can heal ourselves and fly again. We can choose to not let the hardships of life break our spirited wings. Rather, we can keep spreading our wings, soaring in the spirit of joy.
Am I flying today, or must I heal a wound first?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Gardening is an active participation in the deepest mysteries of the universe. --Thomas Berry
We grow in our spirituality by participating in activities that convey a sense of awe and mystery. Tending growing plants does this for some of us. Playing and listening to music, appreciating and creating art and literature do it for others. Hiking in the wilderness, camping, fishing, hunting, or photography have the same value. Membership in a religious group and attending services are other important ways. Engaging in the loving feelings in relationships does this for many of us.
As men in recovery, we need active ways to move beyond the boundaries of our own skins. We need to know we are part of a larger whole which has mysteries we cannot fully solve. When we identify our own ways of being spiritual, we can give them more respect. Perhaps we can also explore some other ways we have not developed.
Today, I will participate in the mysteries and beauties of life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth
For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs."
We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change.
Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it.
Today, I will have faith, and all will be well.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Recovery Prayer
This prayer is based on a section of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous:
Thank you for keeping me straight yesterday. Please help me stay straight today.
For the next twenty-four hours, I pray for knowledge of Your will for me only, and the power to carry that through.
Please free my thinking of self-will, self-seeking, dishonesty, and wrong motives.
Send me the right thought, word, or action. Show me what my next step should be. In times of doubt and indecision, please send Your inspiration and guidance.
I ask that You might help me work through all my problems, to Your glory and honor.
This prayer is a recovery prayer. It can take us through any situation. In the days ahead, we'll explore the ideas in it. If we pray this prayer, we can trust it has been answered with a yes.
Today, I will trust that God will do for me what I cannot do for myself. I will do my part - working the Twelve Steps and letting God do the rest.
I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart – May
Learn to Release Old Toxins
Just as splinters can get embedded in our body, old emotions and beliefs can act like toxins and become embedded in us,too. We may have picked up residue along the way– beliefs we didn’t consciously choose, feelings we weren’t safe enough to feel, toxins from the world around us.
Now is a time of cleansing. Now is the time to heal your body and emotions, your mind and soul.
What beliefs and emotions do you need to heal? Look around at your life right now. What are you thinking? What are you talking about? What issues are cropping up in your life? Who are you talking about? What are you remembering? Who has come back into your life? What hurts? Is the feeling familiar? When have you felt it before?
Once you’ve identified what you’re feeling and thinking, release it. Let the energy go. Let it leave your body. You can chatter all you want about what’s going on with you, but that doesn’t release the energy from your system anymore than talking about a splinter takes it out. Sometimes the process will sting just a bit when you pull out the splinter. But don’t worry. It won’t hurt for long. And soon you’ll feel better that you’ve felt in a long while.
Often the process of releasing old toxins can be as gentle and natural as the way a flower or tree grows with sunshine and rain, a bit of fertile soil, and a little pruning and weeding.
Growth can be gentle now. Growth can be fun. Breathe in new air. Breathe in new energy. Exhale the past, its feelings, beliefs, and toxins. Let it go. Let yourself be transformed.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Learn to say when
Chip turned the rented four-wheel drive Chevy Blazer off the road and into an open field. The three of us, Chip, Andy, and myself, were in Florida on a spur-of-the-moment road trip. We had met Andy at the dop zone, where he’d been trying out for a skydiving team. Now the three of us were on our way to Orlando. It had rained the day before. We started to tear through the field, when the right wheels slipped into a ditch.
Chip rocked the truck, backward and forward. The right wheels sunk deeper. Andy hopped out of the truck, looked around, and then climbed back in. “We’re stuck,” he said.
“I’ve got my cell phone,” I said. “I’ll call for help….”
Chip and Andy stared at me.
“You said you wanted an adventure,” Chip said. “Well, this is it.”
We all got out of the Blazer. The right wheels were entrenched in a ravine, and a large log was jammed into the underside of the vehicle. Andy had a plan. We’d each go try to find boards or wood that could be placed under the wheels. We returned twenty minutes later. The guys popped the wood under the tires. Chip got in the truck. The engine revved. The wheels spun. Mud sprayed. The truck didn’t move.
“I could call a tow truck,” I offered again.
About one-quarter mile away from the field was an intersection that promised, at least eventually, some passersby. We tromped to the intersection and waited. Before long, we flagged down an old Cadillac with a man and a young woman in it.
The man promised to return in a few minutes with his truck and his brother.
About fifteen minutes later, the two men and the woman appeared in a truck. They hooked a chain to the Blazer. Then they got in their truck and drove slowly away. They revved their engine. Mud sprayed. Then snap, the chain broke.
We looked at their truck. We looked at the stuck, muddy Blazer. We looked at the broken chain.
“Sorry,” the two men said.
“Thanks for trying,” we said. “Try calling a towing place,” the taller of the two men said. “They’ll come and get you out.”
Andy, Chip, and I got back into the stuck truck.
“Well,” I said. “Are you ready to call a tow truck now?”
The truck arrived. The professional tower had us out in fifteen minutes, and we were on our way to Orlando. We had been stuck for more than six hours. The entire time, we all knew what we had to do to get out: call the tow truck. For a variety of reasons, we didn’t want to do that until we got tired of being stuck.
Sometimes, getting stuck is the adventure at hand. We might not know what to do to move forward. Or we may be enjoying the drama of being stuck. We may be stuck at a plateau in our career. We may be stuck in our spiritual growth. We may have at one time liked and wanted to be where we’ve found ourselves, but now it’s time to move on.
Learning to say when– whether it’s when we want something more, or something else, or when we’ve had enough– is an important part of using in the language of letting go.
God, help me remember that I have the power to say when.
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In God’s Care
Loving can cost a lot, not loving always costs more.
~~Merle Shain
We are invited to choose and express loving thoughts throughout every day. This often means surrendering our opinions or desires for the moment. It means, quite frequently, honoring another’s needs above our own. In this way it costs us. And yet, giving up the struggle for the winning opinion or relinquishing our desire to control plans brings rewards. We will feel peaceful with surrender. We will know that God has entered our consciousness.
If we never surrender, if we never give in to love, we are kept distant from our true selves and the people we yearn to be close to. Our loneliness in the midst of our friends will bring much more pain than the momentary pinch of surrender – a pinch that in reality promises peace.
I will choose surrender over control, love over self-satisfaction with my friends today.
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The Day’s Closing
Evenings by Madisyn Taylor
Evening time is often overlooked in our busy lives, but is an important time of day for reflection on our day's actions.
From the beginning of time, a richly colored twinge of dusk touching the eastern horizon, the lengthening of shadows, and the appearance of the evening’s first star have let us know that it was time to rest, relax, and retire from the pressures of the day. For human beings and other living things that tend to be most active in daylight, evenings can be less hectic and more relaxing, as we prepare for sleep and spend quality time with our loved ones. But evenings are about much more than dinner and the feel of a cool, soft pillow. Evenings are a wonderful time to catalog the events of the day without distraction, to revel in gentle solitude or silence, to end the day in serenity, and to commune with your inner self.
There are many ways to turn the evening into a nurturing and soul enriching experience. A simple stroll through the realms of dusk and darkness can show you two different worlds: one winding down and one just coming to life. In the evening, the sounds we humans make begin to diminish, and the sounds of earth’s more nocturnal creatures and nature itself become more apparent. As night slowly falls, scents change, and the smell of the soil and greenery become magnified. Sky gazing in the evenings can be a meditative activity – one that reminds us that we are only one part of an infinitely complex and vast universe. Each night, the different phases of the moon show us the passage of time and the waxing and waning of life, as its glowing visage – whether in the shape of a circle, crescent, or a smile –bathes the world in an ethereal, wistful glow.
As crickets chirp and night birds cry out, evening rituals and routines can make your day feel complete, help you unwind from the day’s busyness, and pave the way for rejuvenating sleep. Rituals and routines help you say goodnight to the present day, so you can look forward to the next one. While the sun sets, try doing a series of stretches, lighting some candles, or watching the daylight fade. The soothing, natural beauty of each evening can be your backdrop, as you meditate, quiet your soul, and relax into the peace and stillness that can be found at day’s end. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
For those of us who have lost our faith, or who have alwways had to struggle along without it, it’s often helpful just to accept — blindly and with no reservations. It’s not necessary for us to believe at first; we need not be convinced. If we can only accept, we find ourselves becoming gradually aware of a force for good that’s always there to help us. Have I taken the way of faith?
Today I Pray
May I abandon my need to know the why’s and wherefore’s of my trust in a Higher Power. May I not intellectualize about faith, since by its nature it precludes analysis. May I know that “head-tripping” was a symptom of my disease, as I strung together — cleverly, I thought — alibi upon excuse upon rationale. May I learn acceptance, and faith will follow.
Today I Will Remember
Faith follows Acceptance.
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Food For Thought
We Are Insatiable
Those of us who overeat compulsively can never be satisfied with food, no matter how much we eat. As we work the program, we discover (if we had not known it before) that we are insatiable in other areas, too. No amount of anything satisfies us for long; we soon need more.
We are each created with a spiritual longing which is not filled by anything temporal. What St. Augustine said hundreds of years ago - that our hearts are restless until they find their rest in God - is equally true today. Spiritual food is required to satisfy our spiritual hunger. The fruits of this world are good in their proper place, but when we idolize them we sell ourselves short. Created things in and of themselves are not enough; our hearts can accept nothing less than communion with the Creator.
We are children of God, and the things of this world do not fully satisfy us.
May we find our true rest and satisfaction in You.
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One Day At A Time
SHARING OUR STORIES
" You leave home to seek your fortune and, when you get it,
you go home and share it with your family."
Anita Baker
For much of my life I tried to be “Strong.” I kept silent about my own suffering and focused instead on others people’s needs and how I could help them. Though I could listen and offer advice, I lacked empathy and understanding.
When my stoic, stubborn, and silent avoidance of my own struggles finally made my life unmanageable, I entered recovery. By listening to stories shared by others, I have been blessed. I have found that none of us walk this path alone. We learn from each other and from the strength of traditions. I have found empathy.
I came to see that my silence was born from weakness, not from strength. It was shame, fear, and pride, which kept me hiding. Now I find great joy and freedom in sharing my story with others. I am particularly grateful to God for the way He used my story with my Dad.
My crisis not only drove me to seek help, but it freed my Dad to get help too. If I had remained silent, not only would I have been destroyed, but I would have robbed my Dad of the acceptance and freedom to admit and seek the help he needed ~ and that has so profoundly changed his life.
One day at a time...
I will recognize that my history and my current experiences are not to be hidden in silence. I will share my story with others.
~Lisa V.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this. - Pgs. 22-23 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The question is not if you will recover, but how.
Although giving up drugs and alcohol shatters my illusions about who I was, I use the duration to shape myself into a better being through the 12 Steps.
Gifts
Today I will be thankful for the many gifts that are mine. Life is a gift. Health is a gift. Love is a gift. Friends and family are gifts. If I take the time to say thank you, I have so many things to be thankful for. When I learn to say thank you, to give praise and gratitude, my life immediately feels more full.
I embrace the gifts that surround me
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Although thoughts are things, they are not actions; although feelings are real, they are not facts. They only have the power we give them through our actions.
When I act kindly, I give power to loving thoughts and feelings; when I use harsh words and 'get even' I give power to angry thoughts and feelings.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Prayer does not change the situation, it changes the person who prays.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
When I look within, I find that I have all that I need. It feels wonderful to discover that I already am the beautiful person that I would like to be.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I have no medical evidence that I have brain damage, but I know this; that good feeling I got after about four beers or a couple of shots; that complete feeling of well-being, self confidence and self acceptance - happy, joyous and free. That's the exhilaration of brain cells dying. - Doug D.
bluidkiti
04-26-2021, 06:56 AM
May 2
Daily Reflections
LIGHTING THE DARK PAST
Cling to the thought that, in God's hands, the dark past
is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and
happiness for others. With it you can avert death and
misery for them.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 124
No longer is my past an autobiography; it is a reference
book to be taken down, opened and shared. Today as I report
for duty, the most wonderful picture comes through. For,
though this day be dark - as some days must be - the stars
will shine even brighter later. My witness that they do
shine will be called for in the very near future. All my
past will this day be a part of me, because it is the key,
not the lock.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In A.A. we often hear the slogan "Easy Does It." Alcoholics
always do everything to excess. They drink too much. They
worry too much. They have too many resentments. They hurt
themselves physically and mentally by too much of everything.
So when they come into A.A., they have to learn to take it
easy. None of us knows how much longer we have to live. Its
probable that we wouldn't have lived very long if we had
continued to drink the way we used to. By stopping drinking,
we have increased our chances of living for a while longer.
Have I learned to take it easy?
Meditation For The Day
You must be before you can do. To accomplish much, be much.
In all cases, the doing must be the expression of the being.
It is foolish to think that we can accomplish much in personal
relationships without first preparing ourselves by being honest,
pure, unselfish, and loving. We must choose the good and keep
choosing it, before we are ready to be used by God to accomplish
anything worthwhile. We will not be given the opportunities
until we are ready for them. Quiet times of communion with the
Higher Power are good preparation for creative action.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may constantly prepare myself for better things
to come. I pray that I may only have opportunities when I am
ready for them.
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As Bill Sees It
Willingness Is The Key, p. 122
No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his
own will and his own life over to the care of whatever God he thinks
there is?
A beginning, even the smallest, is all that is needed. Once we have
placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so
slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more.
Though self-will may slam it shut again, as it frequently does, it will
always respond the moment we again pick up the key of willingness.
12 & 12, p. 35
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Walk in Dry Places
Look out for the power trips
Understanding hidden motives
We can often use a lofty reason to disguise a hidden motive behind our actions. We might be seeking power over people's lives, for example, while claiming that "we're only out to help them." We may argue for a point of view only to establish a position of power. Such power trips are destructive, and others usually see them for what they really are.
If we've really accepted the principles of the Twelve Steps, we have no need for power trips. The logic of Step Eleven, for example, is that we'll always have the power needed to carry out what's in line with God's will for us. We do not have to jostle and manipulate others to establish our importance or our authority.
When we really come to terms with our own tendencies to take power trips, we'll be able to deal with others who come on strong with their power trips. We'll soon perceive that such threats usually fade when we refuse to resist them or be upset by them.
I'll undoubtedly meet people today who are maneuvering for power in different situations. I will neither criticize nor oppose them.My responsibility today is to avoid any of my own tendencies to take such power trips.
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Keep It Simple
Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product.---Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us want to be happy. We just don't know how. We aren't sure what happiness is. We've learned the hard way that some things we wanted didn't make us happy. We're learning that happiness comes when we live the way our Higher Power wants us to live. That's when we’re honest. When we do our best work. When we are a true friend. We make happiness; we don't find it. Sometimes we don't even know we're happy. We're too busy with our work, our recovery program, our friends and family. We need to slow down and know that when we do what we need to, happiness comes.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know that I'm most happy when I listen to You and do Your will. You know better than I do what makes me happy.
Action for the Day: What parts of my program am I most happy about? Today I'll think of these and enjoy myself.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Insight is cheap. --Martha Roth
For years we kept ourselves in a split condition: With one part of our minds we looked at ourselves and said, "I do some self-destructive things because I don't believe I deserve love." When we became involved with unsuitable people or abused our bodies, we said, "I am punishing myself--I am expecting too much--I neglect my own needs."
We may see clearly how and why we get in our own way. But unless we have faith in a power greater than ourselves, we won't step aside. We won't let go. We'll do the same thing and "understand" ourselves in the same ways. We may even use our "insight" to keep ourselves stuck--to protect ourselves from the risk of change.
Now, having had a spiritual awakening, having come to believe that a higher power can restore us, we possess a gift more powerful than the keenest insight--faith in our ability to grow and change. We are children of God. All the creative power of the universe streams through us, if we don't block it.
Today, I will have faith, and all will be well.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
If you have been successful in solving your own domestic problems, tell the newcomer’s family how that was accomplished. In this way you can set them on the right track without becoming critical of them. The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism.
p. 100
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
The doctor, a young man, immediately took fire with the idea, and while he did not convince the son, he turned over two prospects who were anxious for the program. The three of us did not feel up to the job, and after a few meetings we convinced the prospects that they, too, should go to Akron where they could see an older group in action.
pp. 265-266
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Overjoyed, the newcomer plunged into Twelfth Step work. Tirelessly he laid A.A.'s message before scores of people. Since this was a very early group, those scores have since multiplied themselves into thousands. Never did he trouble anyone with his other difficulty. A.A. had taken its first step in the formation of Tradition Three.
p. 142
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My experience has been that putting the program into practice in my
life is not just turning things over to my Higher Power, but turning
them over and then taking my hands off!
--Nancy S.
God has got us covered today!!
--Anonymous
When self-will is running riot, hit the brakes, take time out, talk to God.
Reconnect with God to refresh, renew, restore yourself with Him.
--Tammy B.
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you
have, for instance.
--Franklin P. Adams
I bask in the sunshine of God's love.
--SweetyZee
When the pace of change seems overwhelming, we find stability in
God.
--Sherry Holloway
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FACTS
"Facts do not cease to exist
because they are ignored."
--Aldous Huxley
Reality is not dependent upon our acceptance. Addiction does not have
to be accepted to be real. Alcoholism was killing people long before it
had a name!
I need to remember this in the recovery program for my life. A big
part of my life was spent denying that I had a problem. My
manipulative art was exercised in discovering more acceptable
excuses for my drunkenness, rather than looking at the problem. I
danced toward death with God and denial on my lips. Belief in the God
of Truth did not stop my dishonesty.
The process of self-love and acceptance began in my cry for help.
Surrender brought me sanity. God was working His purpose out in my
life because I was getting out of my way; I was facing the facts.
Spirituality is making the words fit the feelings, and the feelings make
the action.
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"Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in
love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant
offering and sacrifice to God."
Ephesians 5:1-2
"Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the
eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at
peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave
room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will
repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry,
feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this,
you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil,
but overcome evil with good."
Romans 12:17-21
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Daily Inspiration
Do not allow yourself to be disappointed by any thing or any person, but rather have faith that in all things God is leading you to your ultimate good.
Not one day passes without receiving wonderful blessings from our loving and generous God. Lord, may I forget the irritations that distract me from Your happiness.
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NA Just For Today
"Just Maybe...."
"There is one thing more than anything else that will defeat us in our recovery; this is an attitude of indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles."
Basic Text, p. 18
When we first came to NA, many of us had great difficulty accepting the spiritual principles underlying this program—and for good reason. No matter how we'd tried to control our addiction, we'd found ourselves powerless. We grew angry and frustrated with anyone who suggested there was hope for us, because we knew better. Spiritual ideas may have had some bearing on other peoples' lives, but not on ours.
Despite our indifference or intolerance toward spiritual principles, we were drawn to Narcotics Anonymous. There, we met other addicts. They'd been where we'd been, powerless and hopeless, yet they'd found a way not only to stop using but to live and enjoy life clean. They spoke of the spiritual principles that had pointed the way for them to this new life of recovery. For them, these principles were not just theories but a part of their practical experience. Yes, we had good reason to be skeptical, but these spiritual principles spoken of by other NA members really seemed to work.
Once we admitted this, we didn't necessarily accept every single spiritual idea we heard. But we did start to think that, if these principles had worked for others, just maybe they'd work for us, too. For a beginning, that willingness was enough.
Just for today: Just maybe the spiritual principles I hear spoken of in NA might work for me. I am willing, at least, to open my mind to the possibility.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A bird came down the walk: He did not know I saw; He bit an angle-worm in halves And ate the fellow, raw. --Emily Dickinson
We must look very different to the birds than we do to each other. Likewise, birds seem different to us than they do to each other. Neither the way we see birds or the way they see us is the "right" way. They are simply different ways of seeing.
If we could turn birds into people so they would see things the way we do, eat the way we do, and think the way we do, we would lose the idea of flying. The knowledge that flight is possible is a gift birds have given us.
We do well to remember this when we get upset at others for not doing things the way we would. Varieties of styles, appetites, and ideas are gifts that enrich the world and bring more possibilities into our lives.
When others disagree with me today, will I accept their gift?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Do not reveal your thoughts to everyone, lest you drive away your good luck. --Apocrypha, Ecclesiasticus 8:19
We've had problems in our lives with limits. We have done some things to excess and others we have endlessly postponed. Sometimes we haven't had good judgment about what we ought to tell someone or whom we ought to tell. We may have kept secrets that made us lonely and sick. Other times we exposed too much in inappropriate situations and hurt someone else or ourselves. Developing these internal limits is a quiet change that comes with recovery. Gradually, we gain a stronger feeling of self-respect and become more intuitive about when to express something and when not to.
Secrets are links in our chains of bondage to isolation, addiction, and codependency. Yet, when we are compelled to tell everything, we lack the feeling of self-containment that comes from maturity. We need a sense of privacy which is the freedom to choose what and when to confide in a friend. What does our intuition tell us today about our privacy and our openness?
Today, I will listen to my inner messages about what I need to discuss with others and when I need to withhold.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
One must be leery of words because they turn into cages. --Viola Spolin
We defeat ourselves with labels. We hem ourselves in; we shorten our vision; we cut off opportunities in the making. We influence how others think of us, too. Someone wise said that we teach others how to treat us. Are we teaching people to expect nothing great from us - because we are always afraid? Do we shatter their vision of our potential--by never thinking we can handle what may come?
We become the persons we have programmed ourselves to be. We can revamp the program, anytime. And right now is a good time to begin. We are surrounded by persons who have done just that.
It's time for praise. We are all that we need to be, and more. We will be helped to do all we are asked to do. We have an inner beauty that only needs encouragement to shine forth. If we smile from within today, we will free ourselves from our negative cages. A new life awaits us.
To catch myself each time I insult myself will be a challenge, but one worth taking on. And it's one I can win!
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Our Higher Power
For the next twenty four hours ...
In recovery, we live life one day at a time, an idea requiring an enormous amount of faith. We refuse to look back - unless healing from the past is part of today's work. We look ahead only to make plans. We focus on this days activity, living it to the best of our ability. If we do that long enough, well have enough connected days of healing living to make something valuable of our life.
...I pray for knowledge of Your will for me only...
We surrender to Gods will. We stop trying to control, and we settle for a life that is manageable. We trust our Higher Powers will for us - that its good, generous, and with direction.
Were learning, through trial and error, to separate our will from Gods will. Were learning that Gods will is not offensive. We've learned that sometimes there's a difference between what others want us to do and Gods will. Were also learning that God did not intend for us to be codependent, to be martyrs, to control or care take. Were learning to trust ourselves.
. . . and the power to carry that through.
Some of recovery is accepting powerlessness. An important part of recovery is claiming the power to take care of ourselves.
Sometimes, we need to do things that are frightening or painful. Sometimes, we need to step out, step back, or step forward. We need to call on the help of a Power greater than ourselves to do that.
We will never be called upon to do anything that we wont be empowered to do.
Today, I can call upon an energizing Power Source to help me. That Power is God. I will ask for what I need.
When I look within, I find that I have all that I need. It feels wonderful to discover that I already am the beautiful person that I would like to be. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
See the Divine All Around You
The woman was old, perhaps ninety. She had the frailness we sometimes see in the elderly, but her life force was strong, vital. She sat in the cafe eating breakfast with a younger woman. “You’ve been through a lot,” the younger woman said. “It must be hard since your husband died. How are you doing?”
The older woman chewed a bite of toast, then responded. “I’m okay,” she said. “Everything that’s happened has brought me to a closer walk with the Lord.”
“What do you mean by that?” the younger woman barked.
“This is what I mean,” the older woman said. “I see God in everything. In people. In things. In the world. In myself. It’s just a closer walk.”
I smiled to myself, quit eavesdropping, and finished my breakfast. Every religious faith has its own language. Each has its own frame of reference. But most roads lead to the same destination: taking our place in the Divine rhythm, recognizing Divinity in all that is– in others, in ourselves, and in all the creations of the universe.
Open to your connection to the world around you. Know that we really are one. The connection is God. The connection is the Divine as each of us understands it. The connection is love.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say when it’s enough
“Say when,” my friend says as she refills my glass, meaning she wants me to tell her when I have enough juice.
Saying when is a simple idea that we can use in our daily lives, as well. Sometimes there is no visible end to the troubles that beset us, and all we can do is seek shelter from the storm. But often, it’s up to us to decide when we have had enough. An irritant might be just a minor inconvenience for a while, but the longer it lingers, the more irritating it becomes. Say when. Say that you have had enough, and refuse to let the irritant into your life anymore.
A draining person can latch on to a sympathetic ear. Know when that person is starting to take more than you are willing to give. Say when. The same can also be true of good things. Some of my friends like to make five, seven, and even ten or more skydives in a single day. I don’t. I love the sport, but I also know when it becomes too much of a good thing for me. I say when.
God, help me know and respect my limits.
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In God’s Care
It’s not what we don’t know that hurts, it’s what we know that ain’t so.
~~Will Rogers
Much of our spiritual progress is an unlerning process. So many “truths” we thought we could bank on have turned out to be bankrupt. Too many time-honored sentiments that are accepted as noble truths are misleading, false, or exaggerated.
For instance, contrary to what many of us were taught, God’s love isn’t dependent on anything we do or don’t do. Our happiness isn’t found in another person, a possession, or the other places we might look – we need to look inside. We really only gain when we give. Struggle brings defeat; surrender brings victory.
I can unlearn my errors by putting God’s truth to work.
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Appreciating What Is
Enjoying Your Age by Madisyn Taylor
Try to enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savor.
In each stage of life, there are wonderful experiences one can savor and valuable insights one can absorb. Every new decade and, in fact, every new year brings with it wisdom, transformation, and growth, as well as ends and beginnings. Many people, however, believe that there is one age that eclipses the others. They expend energy trying to reach it and, once it has passed, trying to retain it. But wishing to be younger or older is a denial of the joys that have been and the joys yet to be, as well as the beauty of your life in the present. Holding on to one age can make it difficult to appreciate each new milestone you reach. Taking pleasure in the delights of your age, whether you are in your 20s, 40s, 60s, or 80s, can help you see the magnificence and usefulness of the complex seasons of your life.
Each new year gifted to us by the universe is replete with exciting and unfamiliar experiences. In our 20s, we can embrace the energy of youth and the learning process, knowing it’s okay to not have all the answers. As we move through our third decade, we grow more self-assured as the confusion of our young adulthood melts away. We can honor these years by putting aside our fears of aging and concentrating instead on solidifying our values and enjoying our growing emotional maturity. In our 40s, we become conscious of the wisdom we have attained through life experience and are blessed with the ability to put it to good use. We are not afraid to explore unfamiliar territory or to change. In our 50s, we tend to have successfully navigated our midlife reevaluations and have prioritized our lives. In the decades beyond, we discover a greater sense of freedom than we have ever known and can truly enjoy the memory of all we’ve seen and done.
Try to enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savor. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I was drinking, I was certain that my intelligence, backed by will poewr, could properly control my inner life and guarantee me success in the world around me. This brave and grandiose philosophy, by which I played God, sounded good in the saying, but it still had to meet the acid test: How well did it actually work? One good look in the mirror was answer enough. Have I begun to ask God each day for strength?
Today I Pray
May I stop counting on my old standbys, my “superior intelligence” and my “willpower,” to control my life. I used to think, with those two fabulous attributes, that I was all-powerful. May I not forget, as my self-image is restored, that onl through surrender to a Higher Power will I be given the power that can make me whole.
Today I Will Remember
Check for “head-tripping.”
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One More Day
Wisdom denotes the pursuing of the best ends by the best means.
– Francis Hutchinson
Remember when we were youngsters and used to say, “When I grow up, I’m going to . . . “? Somehow that magic moment never arrives. We grow a little each day, but change comes slowly.
We realize we have matured when we recognize our days as a series of options. Diminished health may change those options somewhat, but we still have choices to make.
We do not have a choice over the state of our health, but we can “grow into” acceptance and into more positive attitudes. We can achieve the best for ourselves.
Although some of my choices will be different from those I have originally planned, I can choose the best that life has to offer me now.
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Food For Thought
Commitment
Our commitment to OA is total. The program is not something we pick up and put down according to whim. Abstinence is not a diet that we go on and off as it pleases us. Perhaps a seeming inability to commit ourselves to anything permanently has been one of our problems in the past. If so, we are now all the more aware of the necessity for genuine, total commitment to this program.
Most of us tried just about everything else before we came to OA. We may even have tried OA previously and left, thinking that there must be an easier way. Now we are desperate because we know that there is no other way for us. Our recovery depends on our willingness to commit ourselves honestly to the OA program and to work it day by day to the very best of our ability.
When we are firmly committed to the Twelve Steps and the OA principles, we are able to apply them to all aspects of our daily lives with astonishing results.
Strengthen my commitment, Lord.
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One Day At A Time
HELPING OTHERS
If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain
If I can ease one life the aching or cool one pain
or help one fainting Robin unto his nest again
I shall not live in vain
Emily Dickinson
Somewhere along the way I found myself to be a caretaker. Injustices, pain, discrimination, bullying; all these things affected me deeply. I carried it too far. It reached a point where I truly believe I began taking better care of others than I did myself. Was this ego? Codependency? Altruism? Or was this a guiltless way I found to deflect my own problems, pain, injustices and needs?
When I was doing my first 4th Step inventory, I learned something very important. As my sponsor read over one "bad thing" I had done after another she cautioned me to take a broader look at myself. Finally, she made me do my entire inventory over and for every 5th character defect or offense to someone, I was required to write something good about myself. She explained that an inventory is never meant to be focused on just the bad ... but the good also. After all, when a store takes inventory on its products, it counts bent cans of beans as well as the perfect cans of beans and crushed boxes of cereal as well as the perfect ones.
This helped me to see that my life's purpose was not just to help others but also to nurture me when my heart was breaking, to make my own life good and to have a nest for myself that was safe and serene. After working the Steps, I know that I'm not living my life in vain and I still want to help others as much as I possibly can, but not to the detriment of myself ... and certainly not to keep me from looking at my own life and my own problems realistically.
One day at a time...
May I help others who are less fortunate than I find their way. And let me also make my own nest as comfortable as it can be.
~ Mari
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We doctors have realized for a long time that some form of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics, but it's application presented difficulties beyond our conception. What with our ultra-modern standards, our scientific approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic knowledge. - Pg. xxvii - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
'For a time we are living inside a scream where there seems to be no exit, only echoes. The small cares that seemed so important yesterday seem like nothing, and our daily concerns become petty and irrelevant. When we finally reclaim ourselves, as we ultimately do, we are changed.'-- Kent Nerburn, Simple Truths
I am swept into a reality where I see what is truly important, my recovery, and I carry that knowledge back to my daily life.
Opening to the New
Today I will be open to what life offers to me. The world comes to greet me like an old friend each morning. My daily habits comfort and ground me. The thought of moving into my day pleases me. Life unfolds one second at a time and today I will be present to witness it. How much of my life do I let pass by unnoticed? How many of my feelings go unfelt? Today I will recognize that my time on Earth is limited. I choose to value my life a day at a time and embrace it while I have it.
I am open to life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
They say that young people don't get sober, they get caught. Getting caught is a great way to find recovery. We don't care how you get here, whether it is your parents that force you, a school counselor, the courts, or a guilty conscious--you're here. So decide not to get recaught, but to recover instead.
If I'm young, I am respectful of the old farts. If I'm an old fart I don't recite platitudes to the young.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you are in the wrong place, the right place is empty.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am open to making small changes in my life that lead me, a step at a time, on my spiritual path to recovery. I have faith in the guidance that I am receiving. I trust that I will know intuitively when the time is right for those changes.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The secret to long sobriety: Don't drink and don't die. - Anon.
bluidkiti
04-26-2021, 06:57 AM
May 3
Daily Reflections
CLEANING HOUSE
Somehow, being alone with God doesn't seem as embarrassing
as facing up to another person. Until we actually sit down
and talk aloud about what we have so long hidden, our
willingness to clean house is still largely theoretical.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p 60
It wasn't unusual for me to talk to God, and myself, about
my character defects. But to sit down, face to face, and
openly discuss these intimacies with another person was
much more difficult. I recognized in the experience,
however, a similar relief to the one I had experienced
when I first admitted I was an alcoholic. I began to
appreciate the spiritual significance of the program and
that this Step was just an introduction to what was yet
to come in the remaining seven Steps.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
A.A. teaches us to take it easy. We learn how to relax and
to stop worrying about the past or the future, to give up
our resentments and hates and tempers, to stop being
critical of people, and to try to help them instead.
That's what "Easy Does It" means. So in the time that's
left to me to live, I'm going to try to take it easy, to
relax and not to worry, to try to be helpful to others,
and to trust God. For what's left of my life, is my motto
going to be "Easy Does It"?
Meditation For The Day
I must overcome myself before I can truly forgive other
people for injuries done to me. The self in me cannot
forgive injuries. The very thought of wrongs means that
my self is in the foreground. Since the self cannot forgive,
I must overcome my selfishness. I must cease trying to
forgive those who fretted and wronged me. It is a mistake
for me even to think about these injuries. I must aim at
overcoming myself in my daily life and then I will find
there is nothing in me that remembers injury, because the
only thing injured, my selfishness, is gone.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may hold no resentments. I pray that my mind
may be washed clean of all past hates and fears.
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As Bill Sees It
The New A.A. and His Family, p. 123
When alcoholism strikes, very unnatural situations may develop which
work against marriage partnership and compatible union. If the man is
affected, the wife must become the head of the house, often the
breadwinner. As matters get worse, the husband becomes a sick and
irresponsible child who needs to be looked after and extricated from
endless scrapes and impasses. Very gradually, usually without any
realization of the fact, the wife is forced to become the mother of an
erring boy, and the alcoholic alternately loves and hates her maternal
care.
Under the influence of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, these situations are often
set right.
<< << << >> >> >>
Whether the family goes on a spiritual basis or not, the alcoholic
member has to if he would recover. The others must be convinced of
his new status beyond the shadow of a doubt. Seeing is believing to
most families who have lived with a drinker.
1. 12 & 12, pp. 117-118
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 135
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Walk in Dry Places
Knowing a new freedom
Spiritual growth
Most of us place a high value on freedom without always knowing what it really is, or ought to be. "Freedom" in the drinking world is often merely license to indulge ourselves without concern about consequences. This false freedom usually forces us into dependency or the need to rely on others to get us out of trouble.
The "new freedom" that comes out of the 12 Steps is a higher order. It means that by following principles in living we find choices and experiences that were never possible in the old life. We are free from the destructive behavior that always ended in pain and defeat.
This freedom is more of the spirit than of worldly things. It is knowing the truth about ourselves and life. As the Bible says, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." In this new freedom, we no longer pursue activities that are ruinous and wasteful. We no longer deceive ourselves with painful illusions and false hopes, because we've learned to live and think on higher levels. Knowing the truth, we're free from alcohol and from the bad thinking that poisoned our lives and relationships.
Today I'll be grateful for the new freedom I have found in the program. I am free from the compulsions that caused me to hurt myself and others. I am free to choose new opportunities for service and self-expression.
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Keep It Simple
When I have listened to my mistakes, I have grown.---Hugh Prather
Everyone makes mistakes. We all know that. So why is it so hard to admit our own? We seem to think we have to be prefect. We have a hard time looking at our mistakes. But our mistakes can be very good teachers. Our Twelve Step program helps us learn and grow from our mistakes. In Step Four, half of our work is to think of our mistakes. In step Five, we admit our mistakes to God, ourselves, and another person. We learn, we grow and become whole. All by coming to know our mistakes The gift of recovery is not being free from mistakes. Instead, we do the Steps to claim our mistakes and talk about them. We find the gift of recovery when we learn from our mistakes.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to see my mistakes as changes to get to know myself better.
Action for the Day: Today Ill talk to a friend about what my mistakes taught me. Today I'll feel less shame.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . love is a great beautifier. --Louisa May Alcott
Meeting life head-on, with a smile, attracts to us people and situations. Our attitudes shape our world--which is not to deny that problems do occur. However, problems can be viewed as special opportunities for personal growth. As gifts, more or less, that we are ready to receive. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. The stumbling blocks we encounter push us beyond our present awareness. They teach us that we are stronger and more creative than we'd thought. Problem-solving is esteem-building.
Negatively confronting the day is sure to complicate any experiences. A simple misunderstanding can be exaggerated into a grave situation, requiring the energy of many people to handle it. On the other hand, a patient, trusting, loving attitude can turn a grave situation into a positive learning experience for all affected.
We can beautify the day by smiling, at it and throughout all the experiences it offers us. The expression of love to everyone we meet guarantees to make us more lovable in return.
How great is my influence today! I can go forth feeling love, if I choose to--guaranteeing an enjoyable day for me and everyone I meet.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go where liquor is served; we must not have it in our homes; we must shun friends who drink; we must avoid moving pictures which show drinking scenes; we must not go into bars; our friends must hide their bottles if we go to their houses; we mustn’t think or be reminded about alcohol at all.
pp. 100-101
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
In the meantime, another doctor in Evanston became convinced that the program had possibilities and turned over a woman to us to do something about. She was full of enthusiasm and also made the trip to Akron. Immediately on her return in the autumn of 1939, we began to have formal meetings once a week, and we have continued to do this and to expand ever since.
p. 266
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire
to stop drinking."
Not long after the man with the double stigma knocked for admission,
A.A.'s other group received into its membership a salesman we shall call
Ed. A power driver, this one, and brash as any salesman could possibly
be. He had at least and idea a minute on how to improves A.A. These
ideas he sold to fellow members with the same burning enthusiasm with
which he distributed automobile polish. But he had one idea that wasn't
so salable. Ed was an atheist. His pet obsession was that A.A. could get
along better without its "God nonsense." He browbeat everybody, and
everybody expected that he'd soon get drunk - for at the time, you see,
A.A. was on the pious side. There must be a heavy penalty, it was
thought, for blasphemy. Distressingly enough, Ed proceeded to stay sober.
p. 143
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"No matter how much you talk to your plant, if you don't water it, it's
going to die."
--Mike Perry
"Some things you have to do every day. Eating seven apples on Saturday
night instead of one a day just isn't going to get the job done."
--Jim Rohn
Everyone has creative ability. What you choose to do with it is entirely
up to you.
--Unknown
Never make a permanent decision based on a temporary storm. No
matter how raging the billows are today, remind yourself: "This too
shall pass!"
--T. D. Jakes
No matter what we have done, God always offers us the chance to begin
anew. Knowing that God grants us a new beginning, we, too, can look
at our parents, our children, our partner or our friends, anyone with
whom we've had some distance, and say, "Let's have a new
beginning." Love is greater than any of our mistakes.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
UNIQUENESS
"God sees nothing average."
--Anonymous
God created every human being from the dust and yet He bestowed
within all of us His image. This means that we are divine. We are
creatures created to create. We share God's life for the universe. We
are anything but average!
And yet for years we thought we were not good enough. We needed
drugs, food or people to make us okay. We considered ourselves
"less-than", inferior or freaks.
But today we awake to a new message. The spiritual message tells us
that we are forever holding the hand of God. He needs you and me to
work in His vineyard. In us He makes miracles. Today I know that I am
beautiful. I am important. I am unique.
Master, part of Your beauty is in Your healing power. Help me to be
healed daily by beholding my beauty that is forever within and without.
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The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall
stand for ever.
Isaiah 40:8
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one
another in honor.
Romans 12:10
"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust
destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for
yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and
where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is,
there your heart will be also."
Matthew 6:19-21
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Daily Inspiration
Patience grows with practice and elevates the hearts of those who benefit from it as well as your own. Lord, may my actions show love and speak loudly of Your presence within me.
Most of us never set our sights as high as Jesus intended we should. Lord, may the celebration of Your birth serve as a rebirth within me of my sense of commitment, consecration and purpose.
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NA Just For Today
Sharing Our Gratitude
"My gratitude speaks when I care and when I share with others the NA way."
Gratitude Prayer
The longer we stay clean, the more we experience feelings of gratitude for our recovery. These feelings of gratitude aren't limited to particular gifts like new friends or the ability to be employed. More frequently, they arise from the overall sense of joy we feel in our new lives. These feelings are enhanced by our certainty of the course our lives would have taken if it weren't for the miracle we've experienced in Narcotics Anonymous.
These feelings are so all-encompassing, so wondrous, and sometimes so overwhelming that we often can't find words for them. We sometimes openly weep with happiness while sharing in a meeting, yet we grope for words to express what we are feeling. We want so badly to convey to newcomers the gratitude we feel, but it seems that our language lacks the superlatives to describe it.
When we share with tears in our eyes, when we choke up and can't talk at all—these are the times when our gratitude speaks most clearly. We share our gratitude directly from our hearts; with their hearts, others hear and understand. Our gratitude speaks eloquently, though our words may not.
Just for today: My gratitude has a voice of its own; when it speaks, the heart understands. Today, I will share my gratitude with others, whether I can find the words or not.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent. --Erica Jong
How easy it is to look at others with envy, certain that everyone we know is better in every way: school, sports, games, appearance. What we may not know is that each of us is exactly right the way we are. And what's more, no one of us is without talent. Perhaps we simply have not discovered it yet, or maybe we've been certain we knew what the talent should be, rather than letting the talent within us emerge.
It's reassuring to know that we are talented, that we are special just as we are, that no one else is able to bring to this life exactly the same ingredients that we're able to bring.
What special talent shall I exercise today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
"Honesty" without compassion and understanding is not honest, but subtle hostility. --Rose N. Frarnzblau
Any good thing can be used in hurtful or destructive ways. Our entire recovery is based on a fundamental premise of honesty. But our honesty becomes distorted and hurtful when we are not in tune with our motivations. A man who contradicts other group members to feel superior rather than to be helpful is being hostile. If we criticize people about things they cannot change, we are only hurting them. In making amends, we should not approach people who are better off without our contact, or who are better off without our confessions.
As we grow, we encounter more parts of ourselves that may be hurtful. We need to accept those parts too, not condemn ourselves for being human, not hide our destructive impulses from ourselves. Then our honesty with ourselves and with others will not be tainted by dishonest motives.
I pray for honesty with myself first so my honesty with others will be pure.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . love is a great beautifier. --Louisa May Alcott
Meeting life head-on, with a smile, attracts to us people and situations. Our attitudes shape our world--which is not to deny that problems do occur. However, problems can be viewed as special opportunities for personal growth. As gifts, more or less, that we are ready to receive. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. The stumbling blocks we encounter push us beyond our present awareness. They teach us that we are stronger and more creative than we'd thought. Problem-solving is esteem-building.
Negatively confronting the day is sure to complicate any experiences. A simple misunderstanding can be exaggerated into a grave situation, requiring the energy of many people to handle it. On the other hand, a patient, trusting, loving attitude can turn a grave situation into a positive learning experience for all affected.
We can beautify the day by smiling, at it and throughout all the experiences it offers us. The expression of love to everyone we meet guarantees to make us more lovable in return.
How great is my influence today! I can go forth feeling love, if I choose to--guaranteeing an enjoyable day for me and everyone I meet.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Freedom from Self Seeking
Please free my thinking of self-will, self-seeking, dishonesty, and wrong motives. --paraphrased from Alcoholics Anonymous
There is a difference between owning our power to take care of ourselves, as part of Gods will for our life, and self will. There is a difference between self-care and self-seeking. And our behaviors are not as much subject to criticism as are the motives underlying them.
There is a harmonic, gentle, timely feeling to owning our power, to self-care, and to acts with healthy motives that are not present in self will and self seeking. We will learn discernment. But we will not always know the difference. Sometimes, we will feel guilty and anxious with no need. We may be surprised at the loving way God wants us to treat ourselves. We can trust that self-care is always appropriate. We want to be free of self-will and self-seeking, but we are always free to take care of ourselves.
God, please guide my motives today, and keep me on Your path. Help me love myself, and others too. Help me understand that more often than not, those two ideas are connected.
It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Say Good-Bye with an Open Heart
On our journey, we meet many souls with whom we interact, exchange energy, in a way that enhances our growth and theirs. We learn lessons together. We break bread. We share love. But there often comes a time to say good-bye.
A good-bye can come suddenly, unexpectedly, without much warning. Or a good-bye can be expected, planned on, and take a while to work out. The length of time doesn’t matter. What matters is how we handle our good-byes.
We can do it with our hearts open, saying thank you for all we’ve learned. Or we can close our hearts and bitterly say we’ve lost again. We can say good-bye with an attitude of trust, faith, and love, believing our hearts led us together, for the time we were close, to celebrate life and further our journeys. Or we can do it with harsh judgement, asking what’s wrong with us that our paths didn’t let us stay together. We can say good-bye with our hearts open, feeling our sadness, our longing, and our joy. Or we can say good-bye with emotions walled off, saying that’s just the way life is.
Sometimes, it’s time to say good-bye. We can’t always choose timing, but we can choose the words of our heart.
And sometimes it’s not good-bye. It’s till we meet again.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say when it’s too much
I was sitting at the bus stop many years ago watching impatiently for the bus. I had been patient for so long– taking the bus to the grocery store, lugging big bags of groceries home. Whenever I found myself feeling irritated about not having a car, I’d be grateful that I was sober and that I could get around. I’d be grateful for all the good things in my life.
Yet, it was getting harder and harder to be grateful.
The bus finally arrived, and I bustled my way on with my heavy bags, then lugged them the two blocks to my apartment after the bus dropped me off. I didn’t want to cry, but I couldn’t help it that day.
“God, I’m getting sick of walking and taking the bus,” I said. “I’m tired of this. How much longer do I have to wait to get a car?”
Within two months, I was driving an automobile.
It’s important to be grateful. But sometimes, repressing our emotions and not saying how we feel about a situation is a form of trying to control the situation,too. We think if we hold our breath, don’t complain, and do everything right, the universe will just benevolently give us what we want.
Is there some situation in your life that you’ve been hoping would magically get better if you bit your lip and wished long enough? If you’ve started playing the waiting game in a particular situation, tell yourself how you really feel.
Maybe it’s time to say when.
God, help me forgive myself for having needs and desires.
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Going on Retreat
Making Time for Reflection
Going on retreat can be a powerful way to process what is happening in your life.
Giving ourselves time to reflect and heal can be a powerful way to process the things that are happening in our lives, and one of the best approaches to do this is by going on a retreat. Going on a retreat means that we have set the intention to heal and learn more about our spirit, and doing this is a decision that we make for ourselves.
Since everyone sees and experiences the world differently, it is important to choose a type of retreat that works best for us. Even though a friend or loved one may recommend something, we have to trust our intuition and select a path that really connects with what our soul needs most at the time. The most essential thing is to be willing to respect our unique stage of development and to be patient with ourselves since any thoughts or issues that arise are simply part of the process of healing. Just remembering that a retreat is an intense period of time where serious soul searching takes place can help us allow whatever may happen to us to fully unfold. Going on retreat may sound like a vacation, but most retreat experiences ask you to look deep inside of yourself, and sometimes this can be uncomfortable or stir the pot of our soul.
Putting our trust in the retreat process will make space for the necessary work we have to do, making it easier for our hearts and minds to explore wholly the innermost reaches of our soul. By paying attention to these messages, we pave the way for greater healing and transformation, since spending time in contemplation at a retreat will give us the gift of insight and understanding that we can use in all aspects of our daily lives. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“To stand on one leg and prove God’s existence is a very different thing,” wrote Soren Kierkegaard, “from going down on one’s knees and thanking Him.” It is my confidence in a Higher Power, working in me, which today releases and activates my ability to make my life a more joyous, satisfying experience. I can’t bring this about by relying on myself and my own limited ideas. Have I begun to thank God every night?
Today I Pray
May I remember constantly that it is my belief in my Higher Power that flips the switch to release the power in me. Whenever I falter in my faith, that power is shut off. I pray for undiminished faith, so that this power — give by God and regenerated by my own belief in it — may always be available to me as the source of my strength.
Today I Will Remember
Faith regenerate God-given Power.
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One More Day
In our own secret hearts we each and all of us feel superior to the rest of the world, or, if not superior, at least “different” with a difference that is very precious and beautiful to us, and the base of all our pride and perseverance.
– Solomon Eagle
How alike we all are, yet how different. Differences are what make each person so special. All our efforts and all our experiences can shine forth ready to enhance our lives and the lives of others when we dare to let our differences show.
In the complex world, each of us and our differences are needed. To find where our uniqueness is most useful, we may have to go out of our way. We may need to actually create a niche for ourselves as we have done so many times before. In doing this, we affirm our value and that of all others.
I accept my differentness as a gift and a strength, not a weakness.
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Food For Thought
Accepting Normality
It is normal to eat three meals a day. As compulsive overeaters, we made ourselves exceptional by refusing to follow the usual pattern of meals. Instead, we wanted to follow the whims and demands of our irrational appetites. For some reason, what was good enough for others was not good enough for us - we had to have more.
Now that we have accepted a reasonable food plan, we can learn to eat normally. We do not need extra food. We know that our true strength and nourishment come from our Higher Power, not from an overload of calories.
When we stop overeating compulsively, we no longer need to feel guilty about our eating habits or different from those around us. We can accept the fact that we are normal people, not better than everyone else and not worse either. Like those around us, we have strengths and weaknesses, and we are making progress. It is a relief to accept normality.
May I keep a realistic perspective on myself.
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One Day At A Time
STEP ONE
"The cause is hidden, but the result is known."
Ovid
When I went to my first meeting and was told about Step One, that I was to admit my powerlessness, it was somewhat of a mystery to me. I thought powerlessness was weakness. It was obvious that the result of my compulsive overeating could be seen by everyone, but to me, I was not sure that powerlessness was the answer to the problem. As I kept going to meetings and listening to people share about powerlessness, read the literature, and talked to my sponsor, I learned that powerlessness was not weakness. In fact, to admit my powerlessness, was to connect me to a power that was greater than I had ever experienced before in my life.
The paradoxes of the program, such as we “lose to win” and “give to receive” are true of admitting my powerlessness to find a greater power. In The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Over-eaters Anonymous on p. 5 it reads, “Later we discovered that, far from being a negative factor, the admission of our powerlessness over food opened the door to an amazing new found power.” What a blessing it is to now know that I am powerless, and have opened the door of a new found power through the steps, the tools and my Higher Power.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will freely admit my powerlessness and gladly open the door to the new found power in my life.
~ Carolyn
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
When it will serve any good purpose, we are willing to announce our convictions with tact and common sense. - Pg. 77 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now the battle is over, so surrender. You are drug free and at the turning point for a whole new view on living. The weight of the past will drop from your shoulders because a new fellowship is here to help you carry every burden, from this hour forward.
Give me the courage to share one of the burdens of my past battles at the next meeting I go to today. By sharing, I divide; by dividing, I lighten my load.
The Healing Universe
Everywhere I look life is in a process of healing from something. A plant that has been stepped on fights to come back to life. A tree that has lost branches sprouts new growth. An animal that has lost a leg learns to run on three. Life is always reaching for life. It's an unbroken circle. Like a lover reaching for their beloved , or a child holding onto his mother until the pain passes. Life is programmed to heal itself and it will strive towards that with all its will. I will allow this powerful force that's build into my DNA to work its magic on me. I won't resist my own healing. I will allow it in.
I am built to heal
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Although there are no Twelve Step gurus, and God knows we are not saints, there are times when the words and actions of some members touch us so much that we practically consider them saints. We never forget though, that they are human and still suffer. So we reach out to them as they reach out to others.
I remember that the 'alcoholic that still suffers' could just as well be an old-timer as it is a newcomer, my sponsor as my sponsee.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Bring the shoes and the soul will follow.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The doctor had patched up the young boy, who thanked the doctor for healing him. The doctor said; 'No, I just treat the wound, God heals it' - A favorite story of Dr. Bob's.
bluidkiti
04-26-2021, 06:57 AM
May 4
Daily Reflections
"ENTIRELY HONEST"
We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or
happily in this world.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 73-74
Honesty, like all virtues, is to be shared. It began after I shared ". . .
[my] whole life's story with someone . . . " in order to find my place in
the Fellowship. Later I shared my life in order to help the newcomer
find his place with us. This sharing helps me to learn honesty in all my
dealings and to know that God's plan for me comes true through honest
openness and willingness.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When I was drinking, I always tried to build myself up. I used to tell tall
stories about myself. I told them so often that I half believe some of them
now, even though I know they aren't true. I used to hang around the
lowbrow barrooms so I could feel superior to the other customers. The
reason I always tried to build myself up was that I knew deep down
in my heart that I really didn't amount to anything. It was a kind of
defense against my feeling of inferiority. Do I still build myself up?
Meditation For The Day
God thought about the universe and brought it into being. His thought
brought me into being. I must think God's thought after Him. I must
often keep my mind occupied with thoughts about God and meditate on
the way He wants me to live. I must train my mind constantly in quiet
times of communion with God. It is the work of a lifetime to develop to
full stature spiritually. This is what I am on earth for. it gives meaning to
my life.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may think God's thoughts after Him. I pray that I may live
as He wants me to live.
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As Bill Sees It
Freedom to Choose, p. 124
Looking back, we see that our freedom to choose badly was not,
after all, a very real freedom.
When we chose because we "must," this was not a free choice,
either. But it got us started in the right direction.
When we chose because we "ought to," we were really doing better.
This time we were earning some freedom, making ourselves ready
for more.
But when, now and then, we could gladly make right choices without
rebellion, hold-out, or conflict, then we had our first view of what
perfect freedom under God's will could be like.
Grapevine, May 1960
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Walk in Dry Places
Secrets of the New Happiness____ Success in living.
Most of us know whether other people are truly happy. What's odd, however, is that we don't often try to practice the things that bring happiness to others. Often, the happiness we're striving for is really a form of excitement____ trying to be continuously stimulated so as not to be bored or depressed.
Excitement does not create happiness. We find true happiness when we learn to serve others in right ways; that is, without demanding their gratitude or some other recognition. We also find true happiness in self-acceptance___ being generally satisfied with our lot in life and grateful for the self-improvement we've found. We find happiness, too, in keeping occupied with useful activities that place demands on our energies and abilities.
There is no such thing as a happy alcoholic who is still drinking. There are also recovering people who have not yet found happiness. But the program unlocks the happiness, and we do have members whose happiness is an example to others.
I can be happy one day at a time. I will make the choice to be happy today, and to let tomorrow come in its own time. Nothing can interfere with today's happiness.
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Keep It Simple
I am the greatest.---Muhammad Ali
We need to believe in ourselves. we're sober. We're honest. We're trustworthy. We're not making so many problems for other people anymore We do our share. We can even help others sometimes.
We're glad that others help us. We thank our Higher Power every day. But we also give ourselves credit. We're working our program. We can handle life as best we can. And as long as we ask our Higher Power to work through us, we are the greatest.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me feel proud of the changes in my life.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll talk with my sponsor about pride. What is good pride? What should I watch out for?
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Each Day a New Beginning
The rare and beautiful experiences of divine revelation are moments of special gifts. Each of us, however, lives each day with special gifts which are a part of our very being, and life is a process of discovering and developing these God-given gifts within each one of us. --Jeane Dixon
Have we discovered what our gifts are? We assuredly have them, and now that we are abstinent we have opportunities, daily, to share them with others. Sharing them knowingly will bring joy to us, but more than that, we will grow in appreciation of ourselves. And we do need to realize how very important we are to others.
Many of us came into this program nearly feet first. Most of us were filled with rage, shame, or both. Life had dumped on us. We had survived only minimally. The knowledge that we had something to offer the human race was not ours, then. It may still be knowledge that escapes us, from time to time. But we can learn to acknowledge it.
We have many talents that are ours alone to offer the world. Perhaps we express ourselves adroitly; maybe we write particularly well. Listening when it's most needed by a friend may be our finest talent today. We might have gifts as a musician or a manager. Our inner self knows our strengths. We can listen for that voice.
God is trying to get my attention today, to direct my energies to make the most of my special talents. I will be aware.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
We meet these conditions every day. An alcoholic who cannot meet them, still has an alcoholic mind; there is something the matter with his spiritual status. His only chance for sobriety would be some place like the Greenland Ice Cap, and even there an Eskimo might turn up with a bottle of scotch and ruin everything! Ask any woman who has sent her husband to distant places on the theory he would escape the alcohol problem.
p. 101
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
Occasionally, it is accorded to a few of us to watch something fine grow from a tiny kernel into something of gigantic goodness. Such has been my privilege, both nationally and in my home city. From a mere handful in Akron, we have spread in the Chicago area, commuting to Akron, we now exceed six thousand.
p. 266
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
At length the time came for him to speak in a meeting. We shivered, for we knew what was coming. He paid a fine tribute to the Fellowship; he told how his family had been reunited; he extolled the virtue of honesty; he recalled the joys of Twelfth Step work; and then he lowered the boom. Cried Ed, "I can't stand this God stuff! It's a lot of malarkey for weak folks. This group doesn't need it, and I won't have it! To he!! with it!"
A great wave of outraged resentment engulfed the meeting, sweeping every member to a single resolve: "Out he goes!"
p. 143
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It's easy to feel grateful when we receive a raise, meet the love of our life
or watch our children succeed, but spiritual gratitude is not
circumstantial. It arises from a true knowing that God is our Source.
We can feel thankful for every day, even in the middle of life's
challenges.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"Life Is A Challenge - Meet it!
Life Is A Song - Sing It!
Life Is A Dream - Realize It!
Life Is A Game - Play It!
Life Is Love - Enjoy It!" --
--Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba
God's love freely gives me, blessings, wonders, joys.
--SweetyZee
Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul.
--Henry David Thoreau
Praise the young and they will flourish.
--Irish Proverb
"Action eradicates fear. No matter what you fear, positive,
self-affirming action can diminish or completely cancel that which you
are fearful of."
--Mark Victor Hansen
"All of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical
rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are
blooming outside our windows today."
--Dale Carnegie
"You had better live your best and act your best and think your best
today; for today is the sure preparation for tomorrow and all the other
tomorrows that follow."
--Harriet Martineau
My drunkalog can be summed up very simply . . . "Nothing went the way
I planned."
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
WAR
"War is only a cowardly escape
from the problems of peace."
--Thomas Mann
Sometimes it is easier to attack than it is to discuss and seek harmony. It
is easier to lash out, hurt, maim or destroy than it is to listen, forgive,
understand and reconcile. Violence is so often the cowardly way out.
The sadness for our society is that war and violence are often presented
as manly or heroic. Our modern heroes so often carry weapons rather
than the olive branch. Surrender is seen as cowardice. Gentleness is
seen as weakness. The diplomat is seen as the schemer.
My recovery teaches me that nothing is gained by acts of violence,
whereas in the atmosphere of peace, God and man can be reconciled.
Give me the courage to surrender on a daily basis and bring harmony
into my world.
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"He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD
require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with
your God."
Micah 6:8
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
Proverbs 15:1
"This is the day which the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in
it."
Psalms, 118:24
"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against
principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this
age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to
withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand."
Ephesians 6:12 -13
The steadfast love of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting.
Psalm 103:17
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Daily Inspiration
It takes far less effort to concentrate on one thought at a time and usually eliminates the confusion we often create for ourselves. Lord, I pray for clarity of thought and the wisdom that it brings.
When we become aware that we possess all the spiritual treasures necessary for a productive and happy life, we will never want for anything. Lord, You are a limitless source of abundance and love.
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NA Just For Today
"What About The Newcomer?"
"Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry the message to the addict who still suffers."
Tradition Five
Our home group means a lot to us. After all, where would we be without our favorite NA meeting? Our group sometimes sponsors picnics or other activities. Often, home group members get together to see a movie or go bowling. We have all made good friendships through our home group, and we wouldn't trade that warmth for the world.
But sometimes we must take inventory of what our group is doing to fulfill its primary purpose—to carry the message to the still-suffering addict. Sometimes when we go to our meetings, we know almost everyone and get caught up in the laughter and fun. But what about the newcomer? Have we remembered to reach out to the new people who may be sitting by themselves, lonely and frightened? Do we remember to welcome those visiting our group?
The love found in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous helps us recover from addiction. But once we have gotten clean, we must remember to give to others what was so freely given to us. We need to reach out to the addict who still suffers. After all, "the newcomer is the most important person at any meeting."
Just for today: I'm grateful for the warm fellowship I've found in my home group. I will reach out my hand to the still-suffering addict, offering that same fellowship to others.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
A person can grow only as much as his horizon allows. --John Powell
Should you be a doctor or perhaps an astronaut? Maybe being a writer or an athlete appeals to you. Dreaming of what to be can be useful. It helps us set our goals and learn our values. Also, using our imagination lets us "try on" a future role. We learn about our life's direction through our dreams of where to go and what to do.
Not all dreams are helpful, however. Sometimes we daydream about other things when we really do need to listen. Learning how to use our imagination to guide our plans for growing up takes practice.
Imagining ourselves happy and brave will help us feel both. Imagining ourselves as failures can be just as powerful. Let's respect the power of the imagination and use it to form good images of our future.
How can I build goodness and success into my future today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
What if the interests of the self were expanded to ... a God's eye view of the human scene ... accepting failure as being as natural an occurrence as success in the stupendous human drama... as little cause for worry and concern as having to play the role of a loser in a summer theater performance. --Huston Smith
Detachment is a mature and wise way of dealing with life experiences. It is sometimes difficult because it challenges our maturity. How can we take failure lightly when we have been taught all our lives to be winners and to accept every dare? How can we stand back from a loved one who is anxious and in pain, still be supportive, but not take charge as if it were our problem?
We can question some of our old ideas. Maybe we were wrong to think we should always be Prince Charming who rescues maidens in distress. Maybe our ideas about being winners have been compulsions that stood in our way of having true friends.
As my perspective is changed, I will get stronger in maintaining a healthy detachment
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The rare and beautiful experiences of divine revelation are moments of special gifts. Each of us, however, lives each day with special gifts which are a part of our very being, and life is a process of discovering and developing these God-given gifts within each one of us. --Jeane Dixon
Have we discovered what our gifts are? We assuredly have them, and now that we are abstinent we have opportunities, daily, to share them with others. Sharing them knowingly will bring joy to us, but more than that, we will grow in appreciation of ourselves. And we do need to realize how very important we are to others.
Many of us came into this program nearly feet first. Most of us were filled with rage, shame, or both. Life had dumped on us. We had survived only minimally. The knowledge that we had something to offer the human race was not ours, then. It may still be knowledge that escapes us, from time to time. But we can learn to acknowledge it.
We have many talents that are ours alone to offer the world. Perhaps we express ourselves adroitly; maybe we write particularly well. Listening when it's most needed by a friend may be our finest talent today. We might have gifts as a musician or a manager. Our inner self knows our strengths. We can listen for that voice.
God is trying to get my attention today, to direct my energies to make the most of my special talents. I will be aware.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Freedom from Compulsive Disorders
Thank you for keeping me straight yesterday. Please help me stay straight today. -- paraphrased from Alcoholics Anonymous
When I first began my recovery from codependency, I was furious about having to begin another recovery program. Seven years earlier, I had begun recovery from chemical dependency. It didn't seem fair that one person should have to address two major issues in one lifetime.
I've gotten over my anger. I've learned that my recoveries aren't isolated from one another. Many of us recovering from codependency and adult children issues are also recovering from addictions: alcoholism, other drug dependency, gambling, food, work, or sex addiction. Some of us are trying to stay free of other compulsive disorders - ranging from caretaking to compulsively feeling miserable, guilty, or ashamed.
An important part of codependency recovery is staying clean and free of our compulsive or addictive behaviors. Recovery is one big room we've entered called healthy living.
We can wave the white flag of surrender to all our addictions. We can safely turn to a Power greater than ourselves to relieve us of our compulsive behavior. We know that now. Once we begin actively working a program of recovery, God will relieve us of our addictions. Ask God each morning to help us stay free of our addictions and compulsions. Thank God for helping us the day before.
Today, God, help me pay attention to all my recovery issues. Help me know that before I can work on the finer points of my recovery, such as my relationships, I must be free of addictive behaviors
Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Cherish Each Moment
Stop waiting for the one moment in time that will change your life. Instead, cherish all the moments. A desert cactus that blooms briefly only once a year does not consider all the moments it is not in bloom wasted. It considers them necessary and important. It knows the rest of the year, the rest of its life, it is beautiful,too.
All the moments count. The quiet moments. The moments of boredom and solitude. The moments of sharing. The exciting moments of discovery. The moments of grandeur. The agonizing moments when we feel sad, angry, and upset. Each moment in time is equally important. Don’t wait and hope for the one thing, the one person, the one event, that will change your life, plummet you into the future and the life you desire. Instead remember that each moment in time brings change, evolution, and transformation.
Most of us relish the magnificent spiritual experiences, those tremendous discoveries, those important times of change. But those moments don’t happen that often. The truth is, each moment in time is a spiritual experience, an important time of change. Cherish all your moments. Soon you will see the beauty and power of each.
Let each moment have value. Let each day of your life be the spiritual experience you seek. The power to change and evolve lies within you. The life you desire is happening right now. Your destiny is here.
Cherish all your moments. Embrace the beauty and importance of each one.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Know when to say no
Saying no is another way of saying when. For some of us, the hardest word in the language to speak is the short, simple word no. Instead of saying no, we toil on. What will he think if I say no? Mary won’t be my friend if I don’t do this. The project won’t get done unless I do it. I’m not a team player when I say no. A good Christian needs to sacrifice himself. Saying no is selfish. And the list goes on. We abuse ourselves, take on more than we want, and find ourselves bitter and resentful. And we’ve done it to ourselves.
Know your limits. Know when to say no. There may be a few people who are offended by the limits that you set, but usually those are the ones trying to control or manipulate you. Some well-meaning colleagues may tell you that you’re being selfish, but your ultimate responsibility is to yourself. That responsibility includes knowing how and when to set limits.
Look at your schedule. Are you so overloaded or booked that you can’t see when you could have any time for fun, relaxing, or your own personal growth? It may be time for you to start setting limits. Remember, you get to decide what’s best for you.
Learn to say no and stand by your choice.
God, help me to have the strength to set reasonable limits for myself and to tell others when I cannot help them. Help me learn to say no.
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Noticing Synchronicity
Interconnected Experiences
Things happen in our lives for a reason, even if that reason is not clear to you right away.
When events appear to fit together perfectly in our lives it may seem at first that they are random occurrences, things that are the result of coincidence. These synchronous happenings, though, are much more than that, for, if we look at them more closely they can show us that the universe is listening to us and gently communicating with us. Learning to pay attention to and link the things that occur on a daily basis can be a way for us to become more attuned to the fact that most everything happens in our lives for a reason – even when that reason is not clear right away.
When we realize that things often go more smoothly than we can ever imagine, it allows us to take the time to reflect on the patterns in our lives. Even events that might not at first seem to be related to each other are indicators that the universe is working with, not against, us. This idea of synchronicity, then, means that we have to trust there is more to our lives than what we experience on a physical level. We need to be willing to look more closely at the bigger picture, accepting and having confidence in the fact that there is more to our experiences than immediately meets the eye. Being open to synchronicity also means that we have to understand that our lives are filled with both positive and negative events. Once we can recognize that one event is neither more desirable nor better than the other – they all have an overall purpose in our lives -- then we are truly ready to listen to the messages the universe gives us.
While we may not be able to see everything in our lives as being synchronous, we can certainly use hindsight to be more aware of how the universe guides us. This sense of wonder at the mysteries of the universe and the interconnectedness present in our lives will help us see our overall ways of being and will in turn make it easier to work more consciously towards our spiritual evolution. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Many people pray as though to overcome the will of a reluctant God, instead of taking hold of the willingness of a loving God. In the late stages of our addiction, the will to resist has fled. Yet when we admit complete defeat, and when we become entirely ready to try the principles of The Program, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension — freedom under God as we understood Him. Is my growth in The Program convincing me that God alone can remove obsessions?
Today I Pray
May I pray not as a complaining child to a stern father, as though “praying” must always mean “pleading,” usually in moments of helpless desperation. May I pray, instead, for my own willingness to reach out to Him, since He is ready at all times to reach out to me. May I regard my Higher Power as a willing God.
Today I Will Remember
God is Willing.
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One More Day
. ..I was the breadwinner.
Only I didn’t WIN the bread,
I worked hard, and earned it …
– Elise Maclay
When poor health slightly alters the way we live our lives, the adjustment is difficult but feasible. But when poor health alters the way we live our lives and wrenches away even our financial livelihood, the adjustment is far more difficult.
Sufferers of chronic medical conditions often must discontinue working and may have to depend upon loved ones or disability payments for income. It may take some time to regain perspective, to realize that whether we are working or not, we still have personal worth. What matters most is what kind of person we are, not what job we do.
Life has handed me a portion I did not choose and do not welcome, but I can choose my own response.
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Food For Thought
Food Is Not Enough
Food is fine, as far as it goes, but it doesn't go far enough. We need our three meals a day, planned according to the requirements for healthy nutrition, but we do not live by food alone.
We need close contacts with friends. We need to be involved in productive work and stimulating activities. We need to serve in the areas where we are best qualified. We need to use our God given talents and abilities rather than sitting on them. Especially, we need the spiritual qualities of faith, hope, and love.
In the past, we may have given up on "religion." Through the OA program, we have found that our Higher Power did not give up on us. He has led us to this plan of recovery and is offering each of us the possibility of a richer, fuller life. God never intended us to be satisfied with physical food and material things. He daily offers us much more.
Fill my spirit, I pray.
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One Day At A Time
LIGHT
It's better to light a candle
then to curse the darkness.
Old Chinese Proverb
I have been living with this disease of compulsive eating for as long as I can remember. I remember stealing money out of my mother’s purse to buy sugar-filled soft drinks and candy, and sneaking food out of the cupboard and trying to make it look like nothing was missing. I hid food and ate in isolation, pretending on the outside that nothing was wrong. But I carried this terrible secret -- I lived to eat.
As my disease progressed, I acted out in other compulsive ways, and surrounded myself with people who cared nothing for my welfare. I kept running faster and faster, and eating more and more, as my disease sucked all of the energy from my spirit. I sank deeper into the darkness of despair and depression, cursing all those I blamed for my unhappiness.
Through the grace of my Higher Power, my life became so painful that I had to seek help outside of myself. I found this program, and a candle was lit. While my recovery has been rocky over the last 10 years, that candle of progress and hope continues to light my way. No matter how bad things get now, I know that I have my Higher Power and my program friends to lean on. The wonderful people I have met through the program have saved my life, and have shown me the path to peace and abstinence. While I don’t always choose to follow that path perfectly, I continue to recover, and to find everyday joys that make life worth living.
One day at a time . . .
I will keep the light of recovery burning.
Suzanne
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Resentment is the 'number one' offender. It destroys more alcohlolics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. - Pg. 64 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
You will be receiving many gifts from people in the programs: gifts of help, time, energy, possibly money, talents, and knowledge. You will never be able to pay them all back. You are not obligated to pay them back. You are obligated to be of service to others and give to them what is being so freely given to you today.
I appreciate the generosity of others and my only obligation comes in the future, to offer what gifts I can to someone else in recovery.
Inner Cleansing
I am in a process of healing. I am taking the time to allow my body to become clean and whole and as I do that, my mind seems to heal, too. Thoughts arise, thoughts I have blocked out during normal waking hours. They scare me, sometimes. Where are they coming from. Me? But as I allow them to come forward a curious thing happens. They become less threatening. They are, after all, just thoughts. They only really have power when I fear them and push them away. If I welcome them into the sun lit rooms of my mind, they sort of spread out and relax. They are just fears. Anxieties. Parts of me I don't want to know about. But today I understand that I cannot really keep secrets from me. Today I let these thoughts have room to breathe and as they do, a curious thing happens. They dissipate.
I awaken to my inner life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'Suit up, Show up, Sit up, Shut up' is what we used to tell newcomers. We used to say this for darn good reason. Drunk drunks and newly clean addicts shouldn't be running at the mouth about recovery when they don't understand recovery. Unfortunately 'Politically Correct' (or rather, 'Therapeutically Correct') often hijacks our meetings. Do not be afraid to take our meetings back.
In order to continue to help the newcomer, I Suit up, Show up, Sit up, and Speak up!
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Work the program, not the problem.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to think positive and loving thoughts. I know that if I do this I will feel loving and positive and create a positive and loving world for those around me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I looked up 'Willing' in the dictionary. It said: 'Cheerfully ready' - Cindy F.
bluidkiti
04-26-2021, 06:58 AM
May 5
Daily Reflections
THE FOREST AND THE TREES
. . . . what comes to us alone may be garbled by our own
rationalization and wishful thinking. The benefit of talking
to another person is that we can get his direct comment and
counsel on our situation. . . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 60
I cannot count the times when I have been angry and frustrated
and said to myself, "I can't see the forest for the trees!" I
finally realized that what I needed when I was in such pain was
someone who could guide me in separating the forest and the
trees; who could suggest a better path to follow; who could
assist me in putting out fires; and help me avoid the rocks and
pitfalls.
I ask God, when I'm in the forest, to give me the courage to
call upon a member of A.A.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I had to show off and boast so that people would think I
amounted to something, when, of course, both they and I knew
that I really didn't amount to anything. I didn't fool anybody.
Although I've been sober for quite a while, the old habit of
building myself up is still with me. I still have a tendency to
think too well of myself and to pretend to be more than I really
am. Am I always in danger of becoming conceited just because
I'm sober?
Meditation For The Day
I cannot ascertain the spiritual with my intellect. I can only
do it by my own faith and spiritual faculties. I must think of
God more with my heart than with my head. I can breathe in God's
very spirit in the life around me. I can keep my eyes turned
toward the good things in the world. I am shut up in a box of
space and time, but I can open a window in that box by faith.
I can empty my mind of all the limitations of material things.
I can sense the Eternal.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that whatever is good I may have. I pray that I may
leave to God the choice of what good will come to me.
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As Bill Sees It
Look Beyond The Horizon, p. 125
My workshop stands on a hill back of our home. Looking over the
valley, I see the village community house where our local group
meets. Beyond the circle of my horizon lies the whole world of A.A.
<< << << >> >> >>
The unity of A.A. is the most cherished quality our Society has. Our
lives, the lives of all to come, depend squarely upon it. Without unity,
the heart of A.A. would cease to beat; our world arteries would no
longer carry the life-giving grace of God.
1. A.A. Today, p. 7
2. 12 & 12, p. 129
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Walk in Dry Places
Tough Honesty? Honesty
The term tough love came into use to describe an attitude that aims to correct bad behavior by refusing to indulge or enable it. In the same way, we must recognize that there's such a thing as tough honesty when situations require us to deal with unpleasant facts.
One employer liked to compliment his subordinates even for work that he actually considered substandard. Later on, however, he would express his real opinions to an intermediate supervisor, who would then be forced to convey the bad news to the workers involved. The employer thought he was being kind, when he was actually being deceptive and treacherous simply because he wanted to be liked.
We have a moral obligation to practice though honesty whenever it is required, if something unacceptable needs to be dealt with, we must do so in a timely manner..... Taking care to be as reasonable and fair as possible in stating our case.
Being honest in this way with others is also a reminder that we should always be honest with ourselves.
Today I'll face the need for real honest whenever it's required. I'll be upfront with myself and others about anything that must be faced and dealt with. I will not use supposed kindness as an excuse for bearing false witness.
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Keep It Simple
Forgiveness is all-powerful. Forgiveness heals all ills.---Catherine Ponder
We need to forgive so we can heal. Forgiveness means not wanting to get even. Forgiveness means letting go of self-will. Anger and hate are forms of self-will take up room in our heart. Yet, a still, small voice inside of us wants to forgive. Just as others have forgiven us, we need to forgive them. When we forgive, we give our will to our Higher Power. When we forgive, we make room in our heart for our Higher Power. By giving up our anger and our hate, we let that still, small voice come through a little louder. This is how we heal. This is why forgiving is so powerful for us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me let go of self-will. Help me forgive people.
Action for the Day: I will list any anger or hate I have. I will think about how this gets in my way, and I'll pray to have this removed.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . it is a peaceful thing to be one succeeding. --Gertrude Stein
Success is at hand. While we read these words, we are experiencing it. At this very instant, our commitment to recovery is a sign of success, and we feel peace each time we let go of our struggle, turning to another for help, for direction. Because we strive only for perfection, we recognize nothing less; we block our awareness of the ordinary successes that are ours again and again. Thus, the serenity the program promises us eludes us. But we are succeeding. Every day that we are abstinent, we succeed.
We can think of the times--perhaps only yesterday--when we listened to a friend in need, or finished a task that was nagging at us. Maybe we made an appointment to begin a project we've been putting off. Success is taking positive action, nothing more.
Many of us, in our youth, were taught that success only came in certain shapes and sizes. And we felt like failures. We need new definitions; it's time to discard the old. Luckily for us, the program offers us new ones.
Every person, every situation, can add to my success today. My attitude can help someone else succeed, too.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
In our belief any scheme of combating alcoholism which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure. If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time, but usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever. We have tried these methods. These attempts to do the impossible have always failed.
p. 101
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
These last eighteen years have been the happiest of my life, trite though that statement may seem. Fifteen of those years I would not have enjoyed had I continued drinking. Doctors told me before I stopped that I had only three years at the outside to live.
p. 266
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
The elders led Ed aside. They said firmly, "You can't talk like this around here. You'll have to quit it or get out." With great sarcasm Ed came back at them. "Now do tell! Is that so?" He reached over to a bookshelf and took up a sheaf of papers. On top of them lay the foreword to the book "Alcoholics Anonymous," then under preparation.
He read aloud, "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking." Relentlessly, Ed went on, "When you guys wrote that sentence, did you mean it, or didn't you?"
Dismayed, the elders looked at one another, for they knew he had them cold. So Ed stayed.
pp. 143-144
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"'I always remember the friendliness and kindness and closeness we all
felt. Later, I could go anyplace in the whole United States and find a
friend in A.A.'"
--Henrietta D.
"Gratitude is the heart's memory."
--French Proverb
For all my good intentions, there are days when things go wrong or I fall
into old habits. When things are not going well, when I'm grumpy or
mad, I'll realize that I've not been paying attention to my soul and I've
not been following my best routine.
--Robert Fulghum
The best gifts to give:
To your friend - loyalty;
To your enemy - forgiveness;
To your boss - service;
To a child - a good example;
To your parents - gratitude and devotion;
To your mate - love and faithfulness;
To all men and women - love;
To God - your life.
--Author Unknown
"Everyone is a house with four rooms, a physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but
unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we
are not a complete person."
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
HOPE
"Hope is the pillar that holds up
the world. Hope is the dream of
the working man."
--Pliny the Elder
I look at the world and I discover an order, a pattern to life, a balance
within the system. I do not believe in a God of chaos. I find a spiritual
stability in creation. Night follows day; people, regardless of culture or
creed, are remarkably similar in feelings and needs; death makes way
for life. The God who created this world has given the seeds of hope
within the living of life. I am the key to the understanding of the
universe.
In this observation I find hope. If I continue to go with the flow of life, I
will find peace and stability. It is only when I fight the system that I
experience pain.
May the God of order and stability continue to bring balance into my life
by the spiritual changes I continue to make.
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"Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I
press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called
me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 3:13-14
"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!"
Philippians 4:4
"Come near to God and he will come near to you."
James 4:8a
"To You, O LORD, I lift up my soul. O my God, I trust in You; Let me
not be ashamed; Let not my enemies triumph over me."
Psalm 25:1-2
"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in
me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved
me and gave himself for me."
Galatians 2:20
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Daily Inspiration
To become more efficient and happier, daily spend some quiet time with God and with yourself. Lord, what joy it is to know that You will listen.
What we endure in this life is nothing compared to the glory that God has in store for us in heaven. Lord, take every moment of my life as a prayer to praise and glorify Your holy name.
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NA Just For Today
Any Lengths
"...I was ready to go to any lengths to stay clean."
Basic Text, p. 217
"Any lengths?" newcomers ask. "What do you mean, any lengths?" Looking back at our active addiction and the lengths we were willing to go to in order to stay high can help to explain. Were we willing to drive many miles to get drugs? Yes, we usually were. Then it makes sense that, if we are as concerned about staying clean as we were about using, we will try anything to find a ride to a meeting.
In our addiction, didn't we often do crazy, insane things or use unknown substances at the direction of others? Then why do we often find it so hard to take direction in recovery, especially when the direction is designed to help us grow? And when we used, didn't we often, in desperation, turn to our Higher Power, saying, "Please, just get me out of this one!" Then why do we find it so hard to ask for God's help in our recovery?
When we used, we usually had an open mind when it came to finding ways and means to get more drugs. If we can apply this same principle of open-mindedness to our recovery, we may surprise ourselves by how easily we begin to grasp the NA program. Our best thinking, it is often said, got us into the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. If we are willing to go to any lengths, follow directions, and stay open-minded, we can stay clean.
Just for today: I am willing to go to any lengths to stay clean. I will become as open-minded and ready to take direction as I need to be.
pg. 131
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams. --William Butler Yeats
When we hold a piece of crystal to the light, it paints rainbows on the wall. When we tap it lightly with a spoon, it sings like a bell. But when we drop it, it shatters in colorless, silent pieces on the floor.
Human beings, sometimes to our amazement, can be as fragile as glass. It's especially easy to forget what makes people we live with or have known for a long time shine or sing. We take for granted the very qualities that made us love them in the first place.
When we forget how to see and hear the people we love, how to appreciate them, we grow careless. Too often, from sheer neglect, the relationship between us grows dull and silent, then slips, falls, and shatters. Paying attention to other people's needs and feelings can prevent this.
Whose presence can I appreciate today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Living itself, (is] a task of such immediacy, variety, beauty, and excitement that one is powerless to resist its wild embrace.
--E. B. White
Our First Step in this program introduces us to a radical idea -- that accepting our powerlessness is beneficial. Yielding to life's embrace takes us in wonderful directions. The experience of meeting this still unformed day, defining how we will live today, making contact with our Higher Power, accepting the variety and the beauty that is here for us -- far exceeds our individual power. Yet in surrendering to life as it unfolds, we find ourselves on an adventure. This is like reading a good story or unraveling an exciting mystery.
Anyone, whether he has our affliction or not, who tries to take control of what cannot be controlled, brings trouble to himself. Today let us engage with life.
I will accept both the embrace and the insecurity of not being in charge.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . it is a peaceful thing to be one succeeding. --Gertrude Stein
Success is at hand. While we read these words, we are experiencing it. At this very instant, our commitment to recovery is a sign of success, and we feel peace each time we let go of our struggle, turning to another for help, for direction. Because we strive only for perfection, we recognize nothing less; we block our awareness of the ordinary successes that are ours again and again. Thus, the serenity the program promises us eludes us. But we are succeeding. Every day that we are abstinent, we succeed.
We can think of the times--perhaps only yesterday--when we listened to a friend in need, or finished a task that was nagging at us. Maybe we made an appointment to begin a project we've been putting off. Success is taking positive action, nothing more.
Many of us, in our youth, were taught that success only came in certain shapes and sizes. And we felt like failures. We need new definitions; it's time to discard the old. Luckily for us, the program offers us new ones.
Every person, every situation, can add to my success today. My attitude can help someone else succeed, too.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Control
Many of us have been trying to keep the whole world in orbit with sheer and forceful application of mental energy.
What happens if we let go, if we stop trying to keep the world orbiting and just let it whirl? It'll keep right on whirling. It'll stay right on track with no help from us. And well be free and relaxed enough to enjoy our place on it.
Control is an illusion, especially the kind of control we've been trying to exert. In fact, controlling gives other people, events, and diseases, such as alcoholism, control over us. Whatever we try to control does have control over our life and us.
I have given this control to many things and people in my life. I have never gotten the results I wanted from controlling or trying to control people. What I received for my efforts is an unmanageable life, whether that unmanageability was inside me or in external events.
In recovery, we make a trade off. We trade a life that we have tried to control, and we receive in return something better - a life that is manageable.
Today, I will exchange a controlled life for one that is manageable.
Today I will look for opportunities to continue to grow through seeing the beauty around me and in me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Value the Power of Clear Thought
Value your mind, and the power of conscious, clear thought. All this talk about opening the heart has not been to discount or devalue the power of conscious clear thought, or of opening our minds and expanding our consciousness. A gift, a benefit, from opening our heart is increased clarity of mind and thought.
As we clear the pathway to the heart by feeling, expressing and releasing old emotions, we will clear the path to the mind. Just as the body is connected to the mind, so is the heart. A cramped body can cause fuzzy thinking, but so can a clogged heart. To attempt to think clearly and consciously with the heart closed may not work. It may even prove frustrating and difficult.
“Don’t think so hard,” the wise old man gently instructed me. “You’re hurting your head and your thinking isn’t becoming clear. Relax. Stop trying so hard. Open your heart. Then your thinking will clear. The mind,” he reminded me, ” is connected to the heart.”
If you’re feeling cloudy and confused and can’t get answers, stop trying so hard. Move your body and clear your physical energy. Then try opening your heart. You may see a delightful result. Without trying or forcing, your thinking clears. And it becomes clear without the frustration of trying to force thoughts, ideas, or thought patterns. It happens almost magically, and quite naturally.
The mind is connected to the heart. Value the power of conscious clear thought. Value your mind, and its power, by valuing the power and wisdom of an open heart.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Learn when to say no and yes
Read the following sentences out loud.
“No.”
“No, this doesn’t work for me.”
“No, thank you. This doesn’t feel right to me.”
“No, this isn’t right for me at this time.”
Now try this.
“I have to think about that first, before I can decide, I’ll get back to you later.”
“I’ve thought about it, and the answer is no.”
Now, read this.
“I know I said yes and that this was what I wanted. But I’ve changed my mind. This isn’t working out for me. It’s not right for me anymore. I’m sorry for any inconvenience I might have caused you.”
Now,this.
“Go away and don’t call anymore.”
See, you can say all those things you thought you couldn’t.
Now, read these sentences out loud.
“Maybe.”
“Maybe, but I’m leaning toward no.”
“Maybe. It sounds interesting, but I’m not sure.”
“Yes. That would be nice.”
“Yes, I like that idea. When?”
“Yes, I’d love to.”
“Yes, but the time isn’t right for me now.”
Those are your basic choices, with a few variations. Learn them. Memorize them. Then ask yourself when each answer applies.
Learn to honestly tell people what your real answer is. Look into your heart to decide when a thing is, or isn’t, right for you.
God, help me trust myself about when it’s right to say no, maybe, and yes. Then help me express myself in an honest, loving way.
Activity: Do you have a difficult time expressing yourself? What is the most difficult thing for you to tell people– no or yes? Try giving yourself permission by writing yourself a permission slip, then carrying it around in your purse or wallet. It might read something like this: Dorothy has permission to say no whenever she wants. Or it might read: I have permission to say no ten times this week, and yes five times. Then sign the slip, and let it be a reminder to you to own your power by saying no, yes, or maybe whenever each of those answers is right for you.
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Progressing With Patience
Doing The Best You Can
It isn’t always easy to meet the expectations we hold ourselves to. We may find ourselves in a situation such as just finishing a relaxing yoga class or meditation retreat, a serene session of deep breathing, or listening to some calming, soul-stirring music, yet we have difficulty retaining our sense of peace. A long line at the store, slow-moving traffic, or another stressful situation can unnerve you and leave you wondering why the tranquility and spiritual equilibrium you cultivate is so quick to dissipate in the face of certain stressors. You may feel guilty and angry at yourself or even feel like a hypocrite for not being able to maintain control after practicing being centered. However, being patient with yourself will help you more in your soul’s journey than frustration at your perceived lack of progress. Doing the best you can in your quest for spiritual growth is vastly more important than striving for perfection.
Just because you are devoted to following a spiritual path, attaining inner peace, or living a specific ideology doesn’t mean you should expect to achieve perfection. When you approach your personal evolution mindfully, you can experience intense emotions such as anger without feeling that you have somehow failed. Simply by being aware of what you are experiencing and recognizing that your feelings are temporary, you have begun taking the necessary steps to regaining your internal balance. Accepting that difficult situations will arise from time to time and treating your reaction to them as if they are passing events rather than a part of who you are can help you move past them. Practicing this form of acceptance and paying attention to your reactions in order to learn from them will make it easier for you to return to your center more quickly in the future.
Since your experiences won’t be similar to others’ and your behavior will be shaped by those experiences, you may never stop reacting strongly to the challenging situations you encounter. Even if you are able to do nothing more than acknowledge what you are feeling and that there is little you can do to affect your current circumstances, in time you’ll alter your reaction to such circumstances. You can learn gradually to let negative thoughts come into your mind, recognize them, and then let them go. You may never reach a place of perfect peace, but you’ll find serenity in having done your best. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I knew I had to have a new beginning, and the beginning had to be here. I couldn’t start anywhere else. I had to let go of the past and forget the futrue. As long as I held on to the past with one hand and grabbed at the future with the other hand, I had nothing with which to grasp today. So I had to begin here, now. Do I practice the Eleventh Step, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for me, and the Power to carry that out?
Today I Pray
May I not worry about verbalizing my wants and needs in my prayers to a Higher Power. May I not fret over the language of my prayers, for God needds no language and communication with Him is beyond speech. May the Eleventh Step guide me in my prayers at all times.
Today I Will Remember
God’s will be done.
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One More Day
Learn to like what you are, for you take yourself with you wherever you go.
– K. O’Brien
A change in physical or mental health can lower our self-esteem. One of the hardest tasks we have to face is learning to accept who we are right now, not what we wanted to be.
Every day we have the right to assure ourselves that we are doing the very best job that we can do. Acceptance of ourselves allow us a serenity we’ve not known before. This doesn’t mean giving up; in fact, it provides a base from which we can grow. Accepting where we are and who we are today gives us the honesty to admit our deficits. It give us the confidence to really move forward. We can be proud that we are succeeding, even with this new and unwanted burden.
My illness has not changed who I am. The course of my life has been changed, but my direction remains the same — forward.
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Food For Thought
Slow Down and Live
Many of us rush through our days as well as rush through our meals. Often we let ourselves get so busy that we do not enjoy what we are doing or what we are eating. We swallow life in great gulps instead of savoring it moment by moment.
Hurry and busyness are forms of self-will. Deluded by an exaggerated sense of our own importance, we deem it crucial to perform all tasks and activities according to our personal schedule. Impatient with traffic tie-ups, other people's slowness, or unavoidable delays, we make ourselves tense and miserable by our refusal to accept life as it comes.
Time spent each day in quiet meditation can give us glimpses of God's timelessness. We see that our schedule is not that important after all, when measured against eternity. As the presence of God seeps into our consciousness, we relax into the fullness and peace of each moment. Trusting our Higher Power to order our lives, we can slow down and enjoy His gifts.
May I exchange hurry and busyness for Your peace.
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One Day At A Time
CHOOSE HAPPINESS
"Some cause happiness wherever they go;
others whenever they go."
Oscar Wilde
If happiness were to be found on a coin, anger and frustration would be on the other side of that coin, for they are all the children of expectation. As adults, we try to recapture those special moments and feelings of our childhood by recreating them. We use them as a model for happiness, only this time we are the adults and operating the controls. Unfortunately, our expectations are not grounded in reality. Reaching that level of childhood bliss is usually either impossible or fleeting. How can you as an adult compete with the happiness of being a child?
My experience is that we usually have a set-point for happiness. And though we can feel joy and sadness, we return to that same level of happiness afterward. There are things, however, that can help change that set-point. We can come to believe that a power greater than ourselves can feed our spirit, help keep us living in the moment, and enjoying the kind of peace and wisdom that only our Higher Power can provide. It helps ground us in the truth and gets rid of unrealistic expectations. It helps to relax us as opposed to letting our mind bounce back and forth from past to future and pain to fantasy. We learn to accept our life - just as it is. Today. Now
What choices have I been making to choose happiness? I choose to go to meetings and give shares. I choose to abstain from compulsive overeating. I choose to set time for myself every day where I can organize my affairs, and help ward off stressful situations. I also try to spend time with myself in ways that will feed my soul and spirit, not just keep myself entertained until I go to bed. I give to service to others, but remember that I need to take care of myself, for when I am not strong; I have no strength to give.
One day at a time...
Today I will choose happiness.
~ Marilyn S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Logic is great stuff. We liked it. We still like it. It is not by chance we were given the power to reason, to examine the evidence of our senses, and to draw conclusions. That is one of man's magnificent attributes. We agnostically inclined would not feel satisfied with a proposal which does not lend itself to reasonable approach and interpretation. Hence we are at pains to tell why we think our present faith is reasonable, why we think it more sane and logical to believe than not to believe, why we say our former thinking was soft and mushy when we threw up our hands in doubt and said, 'We don't know.' - Pg. 53 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There will be many times when nothing anyone does (even sponsor, counselor and yourself), seems right. But these 'nothing is ever right' times will pass like a cloud overhead. Do not make decisions until the cloud passes, so that you make them in the full light of your good senses.
Let me understand that the 'nothing is going right' times will soon drift away like clouds overhead.
Seeing Deeply
Every day I experience another piece of myself. Yes I am laid low, but at the same time worlds are opening up to me on the inside. My body is struggling to heal and so is the rest of me. I am watching myself deepen inside and become more aware. It is forced upon me by illness, but I cannot help but being a little bit grateful for the time to slow down and go within. I am seeing the subtleties of life, I am watching myself watch the world around me. I have a witness inside that is constantly with me but I seldom take time to be with it. As I witness my own thoughts, I learn about who I am inside, what makes me tick. As I watch myself interact with others, I see how I act in relationships. As I notice the little things, life seems to matter more.
I am renewing my relationship with life
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The old timers used to say that the world's most difficult prayer was 'O, Lord, be as good to me today, as I was to my fellowman, yesterday.'
I say what I mean, mean what I say, and don't say it mean.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Looking for the right person? Become the right person.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will let my Higher Power handle my worry so I can be free, I choose to be alive in this moment and not blocked by the conversations that go on over and over in my head. I will stop trying to figure everything out and will trust that I will get the right answers at the right time.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
How many alkies does it take to change a lightbulb? Change? What do you mean, change? - Anon.
bluidkiti
04-29-2021, 04:54 AM
May 6
Daily Reflections
"HOLD BACK NOTHING"
The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to
confide and your full confidence in the one with whom you
you share your first accurate self-survey. . . . Provided
you hold back nothing, your sense of relief will mount from
minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break
out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon
as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing
tranquility takes its place.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS p. 61-62,
A tiny kernel of locked-in feelings began to unfold when I
first attended A.A. meetings and self-knowledge then became
a learning task for me. This new self-understanding brought
about a change in my responses to life's situations. I
realized I had the right to make choices in my life, and
the inner dictatorship of habits slowly lost its grip.
I believe that if I seek God I can find a better way to
live and I ask Him daily to assist me in living a sober life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I've noticed that the ones who do the most for A.A. are not
in the habit of boasting about it. The danger of building
myself up too much is that, if I do, I'm in danger of having
a fall. That pattern of thought goes with drinking. If one
side of a boat gets too far up out of the water, it's liable
to tip over. Building myself up and drinking go together.
One leads to the other. So if I'm going to stay sober, I've
got to keep small. Have I got the right perspective on myself?
Meditation For The Day
The way sometimes seems long and weary. So many people today
are weary. The weariness of others must often be shared by me.
The weary and the heavy laden, when they come to me, should
be helped to find the rest that I have found. There is only
one sure cure for world-weariness and that is turning to
spiritual things. In order to help bring about the turning
of the weary world to God, I must dare to suffer, dare to
conquer selfishness in myself, and dare to be filled with
spiritual peace in the face of all the weariness of the
world.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be a help to discouraged people. I pray
that I may have the courage to help bring about what the
weary world needs but does not know how to get.
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As Bill Sees It
"Admitted to God . . .", p. 126
Provided you hold back nothing in taking the Fifth Step, your sense of
relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of
years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon
as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquillity takes
its place. And when humility and serenity are so combined, something
else of great moment is apt to occur.
Many an A.A., once agnostic or atheist, tells us that it was during this
stage of Step Five that he first actually felt the presence of God.
And even those who already had faith often become conscious of God
as they never were before.
12 & 12, p. 62
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Walk in Dry Places
Dealing with Fear____ Challenges
Some of us suffer from a free-floating anxiety that is like a general fear, while others have specific fears that cause distress. Sometimes the specific fears are easier to face, because they can at least be identified. Most of us dread that other kind--- a sort of general apprehension that things are not well or that something very bad is about to happen.
It's reasonable to have some fear when facing trouble or risk. It's unreasonable, however, to let fear keep us from acting in our own best interests. A review of the past may show that may of us did that while drinking-- and brought even more calamities upon ourselves.
Whatever the fear, the answer is always the same. We must apply our principles to the problem, take ay reasonable action and then place the outcome in God's hands. No person can do more than this.
This will not bring permanent victory over fear. It will however, give us confidence in the program as a tool for dealing with fears that arise in the future.
I may have to deal with fear today, but I will accept it as part of the human condition. I know that I have great spiritual resources to deal with any fear that might arise, and this gives me confidence and reassurance.
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Keep It Simple
Anyone who follows a middle course is called a sage.--- Maimonides
Much of the wisdom of our program is about how to live in the middle. We learn how to pause and think before we act. We ask, "What is the best way to handle this?" We look for the smooth part of the road. Our actions tell us who we are. We listen to our actions, and we think about them. This listening and thinking takes time. This slows us down. It's good for us. It gives us time to talk with our Higher Power. After all, we want our actions to come from the new values our Higher Power has given us. Thus, over time we act and feel wiser. The wisdom of the program becomes part of who we are.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I I don't get caught up in the rush of the day. Higher Power, teach me to stop and think, to seek Your wisdom.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll set aside time to think, meditate, and be alone. I will listen to what's inside me.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I stand before you as a tower of strength, the weight of the world on my shoulders. As you pass through my life, look, but not too close, for I fear I will expose the vulnerable me. --Deidra Sarault
Vulnerability is as much a part of being human as is strength. Our vulnerability prevents our strength from becoming hard, brittle, self-serving. Our soft edges invite others' openness and their expressions of love.
We learned long ago to be "strong." We were encouraged to need no help, to need nobody. Now, we struggle to ask for help. As we grow in understanding of our human needs, and as we become more aware of the spiritual help available, the difficulty of reaching out to others is eased.
No longer need we look to pills, booze, food, or lovers for strength. All the strength we'll ever need is as close as our thoughts. At this moment, we are a tower of strength, not one weighted with burdens. Rather, our strength is a gift of our connection to a spiritual power that can free us from all the troubles we shoulder. Our vulnerable selves will open our souls to the flood of strength just waiting for our prayers.
I will be as strong as I need to be, when I tap the spiritual source that awaits my call. I will risk my vulnerable self today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t.
p. 101
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
This latest part of my life has had a purpose, not in great things accomplished but in daily living. Courage to face each day has replaced the fears and uncertainties of earlier years. Acceptance of things as they are has replaced the old impatient champing at the bit to conquer the world. I have stopped tilting at windmills and, instead, have tried to accomplish the little daily tasks, unimportant in themselves, but tasks that are an integral part of living fully.
p. 266
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Ed not only stayed, he stayed sober - month after month. The longer he kept dry, the louder he talked - against God. The group was in anguish so deep that all fraternal charity had vanished. "When, oh when," groaned members to one another, "will that guy get drunk?"
p. 144
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"If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not
sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome."
--Anne Bradstreet
We can find no better insurance policy, than working a diligent
program.
--SweetyZee
Today, I will come back to balance with any need or want that seems
to be controlling my life. Instead of dwelling on it, I'll give it to God
and focus on taking care of myself.
--Melody Beattie
God is the only constant.
--Ruth Casey
At times fear grips me and I can concentrate only on the anxiety.
Then I realize I am in God's care and I need only trust and the fear
subsides.
--Michele Fedderly
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CHILDLIKE
"In every real man a child is
hidden that wants to play."
--Friedrich Nietzsche
My spiritual program means that I can play and have fun in my life. I
am forty years old and I can still enjoy going on the swings in the park.
But more importantly I have a daily sense of adventure. My eyes light
up as I ask: How? When? Where? These words still dominate my life.
I can still get excited about life; I can still get excited about my life.
God is forever present in His world of color, movement and change.
But for me God is most clearly seen in people. They are a constant
fascination for me. Part of my play involves people-watching and as I
gaze my mouth still opens in amazement. The child in me still enjoys
the world in which I play.
Thank You for toys, people and "difference" because they add color
to my life.
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Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free,
and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage.
Galatians 5:1
For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use
liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one
another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: You
shall love your neighbor as yourself. But if you bite and devour
one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another!
Galatians 5:13-15
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Daily Inspiration
Each day offers many situations for accomplishment, joy, change and personal growth. Lord, grant me the ability to recognize these moments and the energy to benefit from these daily opportunities.
God knows what is best for you in all matters of your life. Rely on His wisdom. Lord, I place my trust in You because You answer every prayer.
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NA Just For Today
Are We Having Fun Yet?
"In time, we can relax and enjoy the atmosphere of recovery."
Basic Text, pp. 53-54
Imagine what would happen if a newcomer walked into one of our meetings and was met by a group of grim-faced people gripping the arms of their chairs with white knuckles. That newcomer would probably bolt, perhaps muttering, "I thought I could get off drugs and be happy."
Thankfully, our newcomers are usually met by a group of friendly, smiling folks who are obviously fairly content with the lives they've found in Narcotics Anonymous. What an enormous amount of hope this provides! A newcomer, whose life has been deadly serious, is strongly attracted by an atmosphere of laughter and relaxation. Coming from a place where everything is taken seriously, where disaster always waits around the next corner, it's a welcome relief to enter a room and find people who generally don't take themselves too seriously, who are ready for something wonderful.
We learn to lighten up in recovery. We laugh at the absurdity of our addiction. Our meetings—those rooms filled with the lively, happy sounds of percolating coffee, clattering chairs, and laughing addicts—are the gathering places where we first welcome our newcomers and let them know that, yes, we're having fun now.
Just for today: I can laugh at myself. I can take a joke. I will lighten up and have some fun today.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
"Take it away at once," stormed the Princess, stamping her tiny foot in its embroidered slipper. "I hate real flowers; their petals fall off and they die." --Hans Christian Andersen
If love is reserved for things that never die, love is doomed to die. If flowers fade in a minute or two, will not stones wear to sand in time? Even this earth, this garden of life, one day will be like the dust of stars. We must walk gratefully, carefully on it now. Now is the lifetime that passes here, now is the best of all days; now is the flower's eternity in the sun, our chance of a lifetime.
This is all we have, this moment. Within it, anything can be done, any dream fulfilled, if we only use it well. Why hold back? There is nothing to stop us.
What can I do to use this moment well?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Little importance has been given to body awareness. The emphasis is on achievement rather than awareness. Yet it is only those athletes who have a highly developed kinesthetic sense - muscle sense - who ever achieve high levels of excellence.
--W. Timothy Gallwey
The outstanding athlete is guided by the feeling in his muscles and bones. He knows as he moves how much force to apply, how to place the ball on target, or how to dive gracefully. Competitiveness and achievement are useful in our lives. Winning provides us with motivation and fun. But when we give primary importance to being a winner, we weaken and lose balance.
Our balance is strengthened through more awareness in all aspects of our lives. If a ruler refused to hear news from a certain section of his country, his leadership would suffer. When we ignore our feelings and don't reflect on our daily lives, we become weaker and less adequate men. As we read this page today, we are opening ourselves to internal messages and opening the windows of awareness.
God, help me find more balance and learn to be more aware.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I stand before you as a tower of strength, the weight of the world on my shoulders. As you pass through my life, look, but not too close, for I fear I will expose the vulnerable me. --Deidra Sarault
Vulnerability is as much a part of being human as is strength. Our vulnerability prevents our strength from becoming hard, brittle, self-serving. Our soft edges invite others' openness and their expressions of love.
We learned long ago to be "strong." We were encouraged to need no help, to need nobody. Now, we struggle to ask for help. As we grow in understanding of our human needs, and as we become more aware of the spiritual help available, the difficulty of reaching out to others is eased.
No longer need we look to pills, booze, food, or lovers for strength. All the strength we'll ever need is as close as our thoughts. At this moment, we are a tower of strength, not one weighted with burdens. Rather, our strength is a gift of our connection to a spiritual power that can free us from all the troubles we shoulder. Our vulnerable selves will open our souls to the flood of strength just waiting for our prayers.
I will be as strong as I need to be, when I tap the spiritual source that awaits my call. I will risk my vulnerable self today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Feeling Good
Make yourself feel good.
Its our job to first make ourselves feel better and then make ourselves feel good. Recovery is not only about stopping painful feelings; it is about creating a good life for ourselves.
We don't have to deny ourselves activities that help us feel good. Going to meetings, basking in the sun, exercising, taking a walk, or spending time with a friend are activities that may help us feel good. We each have our list. If we don't we're now free to explore, experiment, and develop that list.
When we find a behavior or activity that produces a good feeling, put it on the list. Then, do it frequently.
Lets stop denying ourselves good feelings and start doing things that make us feel good.
Today, I will do one activity or behavior that I know will create a good feeling for me. If Im uncertain about what I like, I will experiment with one behavior today.
Today I feel my entire body energized by my powerful positive, thoughts. I feel alive and full of joy as I feed myself with loving and positive energy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Stay Open to Life
I have a tendency to be dogmatic. If I have an experience that’s unpleasant, I take a firm stand and say, I’ll never go through that again. I’ll never do that again. If something frightens me or I don’t understand it, I’ll push it away. Won’t even consider it. That won’t work for me, I say, sometimes before I know whether it will or not. Being dogmatic shuts us down and can shut life out.
The universe will challenge our prejudices,though. Without being certain how it happened,we may find ourselves doing the very thing we thought we never would, liking it, and hearing a quiet voice, the one that comes from our heart ask, What do you think now? When we’re open, we’ll find ourselves doing things, sharing things, experiencing things, and liking things we never thought we would or could.
Open your heart. Open your mind. Open to life and all it holds for you. Let the dogma dissolve.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say when it’s worn out
Throw it away when it wears out.
John and Al were talking one day about a mutual friend, someone they both knew and liked. “Mark thinks he has to be in pain all the time,” John said. “He defines himself by his resentments. He’s always angry, always upset, and so deeply concerned about how terrible and tragic life is that he’s always pulling out his hair and wailing about life. I’m worried about him,” John said.
“Let him go,” Al said. “People need to wear things out. They need to take their time wearing out their beliefs and attitudes before they’re ready to throw them away. You’ve needed your time to do this. So have I. Give Mark the time he needs–however long that is– to wear his beliefs out too.”
Are you attached to any beliefs that are sabotaging your life– beliefs about your ability to be happy, joyous, and free? Life is a journey through places, through people, and through our beliefs. We wear these beliefs out one by one, shedding them amd making room for a little more light.
Give other people the time and freedom to wear out their beliefs. Give yourself that freedom,too.
Right now, this moment, you’re wearing out a belief. Look around at your life. Trust where you are. Trust what you’re going through. Some belief is wearing thin right now, as you read this. Say when it’s time to throw out that belief.
You are loveable. You are beautiful, just as you are. You have a purpose. There’s a plan for your life. You can take care of yourself. You can think, feel, and solve your problems. Sometimes life is hard, but it doesn’t have to be a struggle. And it doesn’t have to hurt that much and that long. Not anymore. You can detach, and you can detach in love.
Look in the mirror for a few moments. Instead of just being honest with yourself about what you see, be honest with yourself about what you believe about who you see.
God, help me let go of my limiting and sabotaging beliefs.
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Emerging Courageous
Walking Through Your Fear
The situations, activities, and individuals that frighten us remain static. Their relative intensity does not change. Fear, on the other hand, self-magnifies. It is when you are afraid and envisioning all that might go wrong that the energy underlying your fear grows. A tiny flicker of anxiety can easily develop into a terror that manifests itself physically and eventually paralyzes you into inaction. Though frequently, in walking through that fear, we discover that the strength of our fright was out of synch with reality. And we learn that doing what frightens us can lead to great blessings. Confronting your trepidation head-on will help you accept that few frightening scenarios will ever live up to the negative disasters that we sometimes play out in our minds.
Though fear is literally an evolutionary gift meant to sharpen your senses and energize you during times of great stress, it can nonetheless become a barrier that prevents you from fulfilling your potential by causing you to miss out on rewarding, life-changing experiences. During the period before you face your fear, you may have to deal with a barrage of negative thoughts and emotions. Walking through it, whether your fear is public speaking, taking part in an activity that makes you nervous, or asserting yourself when the odds are against you, may be equally as difficult. But once you have emerged unscathed on the other side, which you will, you will likely wonder why you assumed the worst in the first place. As you spend time worrying about what might happen, it’s good to know that your fear probably won’t happen at all. It may feel like a great weight has been lifted from your shoulders, and you will likely feel a sense of passionate pride. Walking through your fear can! mean taking risks and can require both practice and patience. Since it is challenging to act when you are gripped with fear, start small.
Each step you take into fear will strengthen you and help you confront future fears with poise, courage, and confidence. You will also find that when you are willing to stare your fear in the face, the universe will always offer you some form of aid or support. When you see the heights of accomplishment and personal evolution you can attain when you walk through your fears, your faith in yourself will grow, allowing your next step to be easier. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
So many of us suffer from despair. Yet we don’t realize that despair is purely the absence of faith. As long as we’re willing to turn to God for help in our difficulties, we cannot despair. When we’re troubled and can’t see a way out, it’s only because we imagine that all solutions depend on us. The Program teaches us to let go of overwhelming problems and let God handle them for us. When I consciously surrender my will to God’s will, do I see faith at work in my life?
Today I Pray
May I be free of despair and depression, those two “down D’s” that are the result of feelings of helplessness. May I know that I am never without the help of God, that I am never helpless when He is with me. If I have faith, I need never be “helpless and hopeless.”
Today I Will Remember
Despair is the absence of Faith.
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One More Day
Troubles, like babies, grow larger by nursing.
– Lady Holland
The more we allow ourselves to fret about our troubles, the larger they appear to grow. Soon they are blown out of proportion.
Perhaps we need to set some time aside each day specifically for worrying. It’s much easier to put our worrisome thoughts out of our minds if we know that we will deal with them at a certain time every day. This “worry time” will also give us the chance to decide whether we have any control over these problems or whether we should just let them go. None of us is without problems, and if we address them with some serious thinking time each day, we should be able to free our minds for some of the more important things in our lives — like personal growth and development of values.
I will strike a happy balance between worries and joys.
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Food For Thought
Communicating
If we do not tell people what is troubling us, they cannot help. We have sometimes been too proud or too shy to let others know what we were feeling. Rather than trying to communicate with those close to us, we ate. Eating instead of communicating further increased our isolation and unhappiness.
Exposing our feelings makes us vulnerable, and we often fear that we will be hurt or rejected. We may be trying to preserve a false image of ourselves as self-sufficient and free of problems. Whatever the reasons for our unwillingness to communicate, we are cheating ourselves. By "clamming up," we cut ourselves off from the care and support of those who love us.
Honest sharing between individuals opens the way for growth and change. By expressing our thoughts and feelings out loud to another person, we become better able to understand and deal with whatever is bothering us. More important, we deepen our relationships with family and friends when we are willing to communicate on a meaningful level.
Give me courage to communicate.
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One Day At A Time
EXPECTATIONS
“The best thing about the future
is that it only comes one day at a time."
Abraham Lincoln
Being a rational, logical person I have always worked from the premise that If I did something then the following would be the outcome and maybe in the scientific world that may have been true. But in the real world of relationships and people it certainly doesn't work like that as I have discovered since coming into program. As it says in the Big Book "serenity is inversely proportional to one's expectations" and I know now how true this is.
Just recently after having set a boundary with my son I was expecting all sorts of repercussions and imagined him trying to talk me out of my decision and the result was that I lost my serenity and became really anxious. Of course the truth was nowhere like I had imagined and the situation ended very differently from what I had expected. This was a lesson to me once again that things don't turn out the way we expect them to but the way they are meant to.
One day at a time...
When I let go of any expectations I have of how a situation is going to turn out, I get to keep my serenity and the situation turns out the way it's supposed to.
~ Sharon S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. 'Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?' As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. - Pg. 47 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Regaining the natural habit of sleeping takes time. If you are tired right now from lack of sleep, it is normal. As long as you don't 'take' anything for it, you will be OK. Rest, pray, and know that it won't always be so difficult.
Give me a quiet spirit to meet the times when I don't have all the sleep I think I need.
Fear
Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears. I don't need to let them control and color the circumstances of my life. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing can mobilize my deep fears, they come up more intensely than normal. But this is a part of my process, and growth and healing aren't neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass.
I have compassion for the fearful part of me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
If God is your co-pilot, switch seats! (Anonymous Sage) There is something special waiting for you to do today that won't get done if you are flying around doing your own thing.
When I let my Higher Power pilot my life, I know that inspiration will guide my actions and that 'special something' will get done.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You are less likely to fall into temptation if you don't walk along the edge.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I feel my entire body energized by my powerful positive, thoughts. I feel alive and full of joy as I feed myself with loving and positive energy.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
The first drink I ever had I realized what my problem was: I had an alcohol deficiency. - Trip S.
bluidkiti
04-29-2021, 04:54 AM
May 7
Daily Reflections
RESPECT FOR OTHERS
Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be
unaffected. The rule is we must be hard on our self, but always
considerate of others.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 74
Respect for others is the lesson that I take out of this passage. I must go
to any lengths to free myself if I wish to find that peace of mind that I
have sought for so long. However, none of this must be done at
another's expense. Selfishness has no place in the A.A. way of life.
When I take the Fifth Step it's wiser to choose a person with whom I
share common aims because if that person does not understand me, my
spiritual progress may be delayed and I could be in danger of a relapse.
So I ask for divine guidance before choosing the man or woman whom I
take into my confidence.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
It's very important to keep in a grateful frame of mind, if we want to
stay sober. We should be grateful that we're living in a day and age
when alcoholics aren't treated as they often used to be treated before
Alcoholics Anonymous was started. In the old days, every town had its
town drunk who was regarded with scorn and ridiculed by the rest of
the townspeople. We have come into A.A. and found all the sympathy,
understanding, and fellowship that we could ask for. There's no other
group like A.A. in the world. Am I grateful?
Meditation For The Day
God takes our efforts for good and blesses them. God needs our efforts.
We need God's blessing. Together, they mean spiritual success. Our
efforts are necessary. We cannot merely relax and drift with the tide.
We must often direct our efforts against the tide of materialism around
us. When difficulties come, our efforts are needed to surmount them. But
God directs our efforts into the right channels and God's power is
necessary to help us choose the right.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may choose the right. I pray that I may have God's blessing
and direction in all my efforts for good.
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As Bill Sees It
Persistence in Prayer, p. 127
We often tend to slight serious meditation and prayer as something
not really necessary. To be sure, we feel it is something that might
help us to meet an occasional emergency, but at first many of us are
apt to regard it as a somewhat mysterious skill of clergymen, from
which we may hope to get a secondhand benefit.
<< << << >> >> >>
In A.A. we have found that the actual good results of prayer are
beyond question. They are matters of knowledge and experience.
All those who have persisted have found strength not ordinarily their
own. They have found wisdom beyond their usual capability. And
they have increasingly found a peace of mind which can stand firm in
the face of difficult circumstances.
12 & 12
1. p. 96
2. p. 104
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Walk in Dry Places
Did I have a dysfunctional family?
Healing the Past.
We hear much about the long-term effects of growing up in a dysfunctional family. Many alcoholics, in fact, have bitter memories of their own parents' drinking, and may feel this caused needless deprivation and misery.
Whether our families were dysfunctional or not, we must agree that most of our parents did the best they could. We cannot bring back the past---- nor can they, ----and it is best released, forgiven, and forgotten. Our wisest course is to use the tools of the program to reach the maturity and well-being that will bring happiness into our own lives. This will not happen, however, if we believe that growing up in a dysfunctional home has left us permanently impaired.
In our fellowship, we can find endless examples of people who used the Twelve Steps to overcome all kinds of emotional and physical disabilities. Just when we start thinking something in our past is a permanent handicap, we meet other people who survived the same bitter experiences and are living life to the fullest. They've cleared away the wreckage of their past in order to build wisely for the future.
I'll remember today that I am not bound or limited by anything that was ever done or said to me. I face the day with self-confidence and a sense of expectancy, knowing that I am really a fortunate person with many reasons to be grateful.
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Keep It Simple
So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.---Will Rogers
Secrets help keep us sick. In our drinking and using days, we did things we weren't proud of. We lived in a secret world we were ashamed of. This part of the power of addiction. Our behavior and our secrets kept us trapped. Recovery offers us a way out of this secret world. In our groups, we share our secrets, and they lose their power over us. There may be things we're too ashamed to talk about in our groups. When we share these things in our Fifth Step, they lose their power over us.
We have a new life that we're not ashamed to talk about. When shame leaves, pride enters our hearts. We know we're good people!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me live a good life.
Action for the Day: Do I have any secrets that get in my way? Do I need to do a Fifth Step? If so, I'll pick a date---today.
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Each Day a New Beginning
We tend to think of the rational as a higher order, but it is the emotional that marks our lives. One often learns more from ten days of agony than from ten years of contentment. --Merle Shain
Pain stretches us. It pushes us toward others. It encourages us to pray. It invites us to rely on many resources, particularly those within.
We develop our character while handling painful times. Pain offers wisdom. It prepares us to help other women whose experiences repeat our own. Our own pain offers us the stories that help another who is lost and needs our guidance.
When we reflect on our past for a moment, we can recall the pain we felt last month or last year; the pain of a lost love, or the pain of no job and many bills; perhaps the pain of children leaving home, or the death of a near and dear friend. It might have seemed to us that we couldn't cope. But we did, somehow, and it felt good. Coping strengthened us.
What we forget, even now, is that we need never experience a painful time alone. The agony that accompanies a wrenching situation is dissipated as quickly and as silently as the entrance of our higher power, when called upon.
I long for contentment. And I deserve those times. But without life's pain I would fail to recognize the value of contentment.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
You will note that we made and important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, “Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?” If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead!
pp. 101- 102
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
Where derision, contempt, and pity were once shown me, I now enjoy the respect of many people. Where once I had casual acquaintances, all of whom were fair-weathered friends, I now have a host of friends who accept me for what I am. And over my A.A. years I have made many real, honest, sincere friendships that I shall always cherish.
p. 267
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Quite a while later, Ed got a sales job which took him out of town. At the end of a few days, the news came in. He'd sent a telegram for money, and everybody knew what that meant! Then he got on the phone. In those days, we'd go anywhere on a Twelfth Step job, no matter how unpromising. But this time nobody stirred. "Leave him alone! Let him try it by himself for once; maybe he'll learn a lesson!"
p. 144
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Whoever seeks God . . . has already found God.
"The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age,
which means never losing your enthusiasm."
--Aldous Huxley
"A happy life is made up of little things . . . a gift sent, a letter written, a
call made, a recommendation given, transportation provided, a cake
made, a book lent, a check sent."
--Carol Holmes
"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by
the attitude you bring to life."
--John Homer Miller
We need to let the old go, so the new can emerge.
--Peggy Bassett
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SUCCESS
"There is no failure except in no
longer trying."
--Elbert Hubbard
I produced the failure in my life. For years I would blame everything and
everyone - my parents, the job, my health, low income, a cruel world,
thoughtless friends, the weather! Today I am able to own my failures
because they are mine.
Today I am also able to see my successes - and this makes me a winner.
I am able to see the things that I have achieved, the character defects I
have confronted, the happiness that comes with an acceptance of self.
I may not be perfect but I am certainly not worthless. I may make
mistakes but I am not evil. I have a heart that needs to love and also
needs to be loved. Today I am able to reveal my vulnerability and
discover its strength.
This underling is learning how to fly.
Master, may I continue to seek Your power and glory in my life.
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For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made his light
shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of
God in the face of Christ.
2 Corinthians 4:6
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting
away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and
momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far
outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what
is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
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Daily Inspiration
Right now is a good time to free yourself of the burden of that which needs to be done, but has been put off. Lord, little by little, help me remove my procrastinations so that I can fully live in the present.
Live a God-filled life and it will be only natural that you will express enthusiasm for life, joy, laughter and happiness. Lord, may the way I live always express my love for You.
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NA Just For Today
Turning Turmoil Into Peace
"With the world in such a turmoil, I feel I have been blessed to be where I am."
Basic Text, p. 155
Some days it doesn't pay to turn on the news, we hear so many stories about violence and mayhem. When we used, many of us grew accustomed to violence. Through the fog of our addiction, we rarely got too disturbed by the state of the world. When we are clean, however, many of us find we are particularly sensitive to the world around us. As recovering people, what can we do to make it a better place?
When we find ourselves disturbed by the turmoil of our world, we can find comfort in prayer and meditation. When it seems like everything is turned upside down, our contact with our Higher Power can be our calm in the midst of any storm. When we are centered on our spiritual path, we can respond to our fears with peace. And by living peaceably ourselves, we invite a spirit of peace to enter our world. As recovering people, we can affect positive change by doing our best to practice the principles of our program.
Just for today: I will enhance peace in the world by living, speaking, and acting peacefully in my own life.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Our deeds will travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are. --George Eliot
We grow within, the way a tree does. We've all seen the rings representing the years of a tree's life. We carry our histories with us, too. Our actions, our attitudes, our goals, and our dreams all gather together inside us to make us what we are today. We're probably ashamed of some of our past, but our behavior each day adds to our history, and we control it.
We can't escape our mistakes, but we don't have to repeat them; and every day that is lived well gives us a history to be proud of.
How can I add goodness to my past--and my future--by my actions today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem, of what to say and how to say it. --Edward R. Murrow
We may reduce our difficulties with others to communication problems, yet the remedy may remain unclear. How can we become more responsible for our share of the communication? Can we stop blaming others? When we improve in those ways, our relationships get better.
Clear, specific, and direct language will help us be more responsible and less blaming. We can use simple words that expose the truth rather than words that hide or sugarcoat it. We can use specific examples and give details rather than generalities or hints. We can be more direct by using you and me language. In the process, we yield to the truth within ourselves - and become more honest.
Today, I will be aware of communicating clearly, specifically, and directly.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
We tend to think of the rational as a higher order, but it is the emotional that marks our lives. One often learns more from ten days of agony than from ten years of contentment. --Merle Shain
Pain stretches us. It pushes us toward others. It encourages us to pray. It invites us to rely on many resources, particularly those within.
We develop our character while handling painful times. Pain offers wisdom. It prepares us to help other women whose experiences repeat our own. Our own pain offers us the stories that help another who is lost and needs our guidance.
When we reflect on our past for a moment, we can recall the pain we felt last month or last year; the pain of a lost love, or the pain of no job and many bills; perhaps the pain of children leaving home, or the death of a near and dear friend. It might have seemed to us that we couldn't cope. But we did, somehow, and it felt good. Coping strengthened us.
What we forget, even now, is that we need never experience a painful time alone. The agony that accompanies a wrenching situation is dissipated as quickly and as silently as the entrance of our higher power, when called upon.
I long for contentment. And I deserve those times. But without life's pain I would fail to recognize the value of contentment.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Fear
Fear is at the core of codependency. It can motivate us to control situations or neglect ourselves.
Many of us have been afraid for so long that we don't label our feelings fear. We're used to feeling upset and anxious. It feels normal.
Peace and serenity may be uncomfortable.
At one time, fear may have been appropriate and useful. We may have relied on fear to protect ourselves, much the way soldiers in a war rely on fear to help them survive. But now, in recovery, we're living life differently.
Its time to thank our old fears for helping us survive, then wave good bye to them. Welcome peace, trust, acceptance, and safety. We don't need that much fear anymore. We can listen to our healthy fears, and let go of the rest.
We can create a feeling of safety for ourselves, now. We are safe, now. We've made a commitment to take care of ourselves. We can trust and love ourselves.
God, help me let go of my need to be afraid. Replace it with a need to be at peace. Help me listen to my healthy fears and relinquish the rest.
Today I choose to accept live on life's terms...all of it. I am open to all I see, hear, think and feeling the moment, without resistance. I am opening to be fully alive and enjoying the adventure. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Are You Angry?
Anger ranks high on the list of perplexing, troublesome emotions. We want to be kind and loving, but then suddenly we feel a jolt in our heart, an edge to our voice. Something has been tapped deep inside. It could be a chunk of old anger, something we weren’t conscious of or safe enough to feel back then. It may be current. Something has come into our life today, and our reaction is anger.
Oh no, we may think, this sin’t what I need. But denying anger will not bring us joy. Hiding it, tucking it away deep inside is not the answer. We may even turn it upon ourselves. Not feeling anger won’t make it go away. Its energy will still be there, pounding away inside us and, in subtle ways, pounding away at others,too. Until we acknowledge our anger, feel it, and release it, it will keep us off balance, on edge, and irritable. We need to give ourselves permission to feel all our emotions, including anger.
But allowing yourself to feel angry doesn’t mean giving yourself permission to rage, to hack and cleave at the world, to verbally abuse those around you. Find ways to express your anger with grace and dignity. Park your car, roll down the windows, and yell. Find a solitary place, a spot where you are safe, then speak loudly about how you feel. Write it out. Shout it out. Pound it out. Go to the gym and work it out.
Anger can be a guide, Used creatively, it can help us decide where to go and where not to go. It can help us get to the next place in our lives. Feeling and expressing our anger in appropriate ways will take us forward to a place of power within ourselves.
Let yourself feel angry when anger is what you really feel. Then get the anger out of your head and out of your body. Once that’s happened, you’ll feel clear. You’ll know what to do next. The path to your heart, to your inner voice, will be opened. Sometimes getting angry is exactly what we need to do next.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say when it’s time to stop coping
In her book Recovering from the Loss of a Child, author Katherine Fair Donnelly writes of a man whose infant daughter, Robyn, died from SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). The child died in the stroller, while the mother was out walking her. The father had stopped to get a haircut that day and was given a number for his turn.
“It was something he never did again in future years,” Donnelly wrote. “He would never take a number at the barber’s and always came home first to make sure everything was all right. Then he would go and get a haircut. It became one of the ways he found of coping.”
I hate “coping.” It’s not living. It’s not being free. It reeks of “surviving.”
But sometimes it’s the best we can do, for a while.
Eight years after my son died, I was signing the papers to purchase a home. It was the first home I had bought since his death. The night before he died, I had also signed papers to buy a new home. I didn’t know that I had begun to associate buying a home with his death, until I noticed my hand trembling and my heart pounding as I finished signing the purchase agreement. For eight years, I had simply avoided buying a home, renting one less-than-desirable place after another and complaining about the travails of being a renter. I only knew then that I was “never going to buy another house again.” I didn’t understand that I was coping.
Many of us find ways of coping. As children, we may have become very angry with our parents. Having no recourse, we may have said to ourselves, “I’ll show them. I’m never going to do well at music, or sports, or studies again.” As adults, we may deal with a loss or death, by saying, “I’m always going to be nice to people and make them happy.Then they won’t go away.” Or we may deal with a betrayal by saying, “I’m never going to open my heart to a woman, or man, again.”
Coping often includes making an incorrect connection between an event and our behavior. It may help us survive, but at some point our coping behaviors usually get in our way. They become habits and take on a life of their own. And although we think we’re protecting ourselves or someone we love, we aren’t.
Robyn didn’t die because her father took a number and waited to get his hair cut.
My son didn’t die because I bought a new house.
Are you keeping yourself from doing something that you really want to do as a means of coping with something that happened to you a long time ago? Cope if you must, if it helps save your life. But maybe today is the day you could set yourself free.
God, show me if I’m limiting myself and my life in some way by using an outdated coping behavior. Help me know that I’m safe and strong enough now to let that survival behavior go.
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Undistracted Energy
Pure Thoughts
The longer we are able to hold a positive thought, the stronger that energy around us becomes.
If we make no effort at all, our thoughts usually scatter in a vast array of directions. They start and stop and move in surprising ways from one second to the next. If we try to follow our thoughts without controlling them, we will be amazed at how truly inconsistent they are. Yet, if we apply our minds to a specific task, especially one that interests us, they gather together and allow us to focus our attention, creating great power and energy. This is what is known as pure thought, because it is undistracted.
The law of attraction—like attracts like—influences all energy, including our thoughts, and this is what makes pure thought so potent. Our undistracted thoughts create a powerful magnet that draws similar energy into our vibrational field. As a result, the longer we are able to hold positive thoughts in our minds, the more powerful the positive energy around us becomes. We don’t need to focus on action and controlling so much when we are surrounded by energy that draws what we want toward us. We can simply respond to the opportunities that naturally come our way. When this is the essence of our experience, we can go with the flow, knowing that we will be okay.
If pure thought is a body, it is our emotions that supply the heart that can really bring it to life. Our thoughts and feelings exist in relation to one another, and they form a feedback loop through which they communicate and empower each other. When we hold a thought in our mind without being distracted, we have achieved pure thought. When we have a positive emotional response to that thought, we enable it to dance and move and breathe itself into existence. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
If I believe that it’s hopeless to expect any improvement in my life, I’m doubting the power of God. If I believe I have reason for despair, I’m confessing personal failure, for I do have the power to change myself; nothing can prevent it but my own unwillingness. I can learn in The Program to avail myself of the immense, inexhaustible power of God — if I’m willing to be continually aware of God’s nearness. Do I still imagine that my satisfaction with life depends on what someone else may do?
Today I Pray
May I give over my life to the will of God, not to the whims and insensitivities of others. When I counted solely on what other people did and thought and felt for my own happiness, I became nothing more than a cheap mirror reflecting others’ lives. May I remain close to God in all things. I value msyelf because He values me. May I have my being in his Being and be dependent only upon Him.
Today I Will Remember
Stay close to God.
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One More Day
Faith has a powerful effect in helping people recover a sense of balance, tranquility, and hope.
– Robert Veninga
It’s the funniest thing about human nature: When we are well we accept our Higher Power with few second thoughts. When we have undergone some kind of crisis, however, large numbers of people seem to lose their faith for a while. After all, who among us hasn’t asked, “Why me?” when our health first took a turn for the worse? Questioning our faith is common at such a time.
A health crisis often encourages soul-searching, and spiritual exploration. Life as we knew it has gone Topsy-turvy, and we need time to adjust. After a while many of us return with renewed strength to our spiritual beliefs.
My belief in my Higher Power may have diminished for a while, but I take comfort in knowing that belief is always there.
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Food For Thought
Anger
When angry, many of us overate. Now that we are abstaining, what do we do with our anger?
First of all, we need to be in touch with our feelings so that we can recognize anger when it occurs. In our overeating days, we often may not have realized that we were angry instead of hungry. Not until we were stuffed with food did the anger surface, and then we frequently directed it at ourselves for overeating.
Getting the carbohydrates out of our system allows us to be more aware of our true feelings and reactions. If we can catch our anger when it begins, it is easier to handle. Expressing it in the early stages is less devastating to ourselves and others than waiting until it builds up into a rage.
The best thing we can do with anger is to turn it over to our Higher Power. If we hang on to it, we can be destroyed. Practicing the Steps every day helps us get rid of anger. If we let Him, our Higher Power will take it away.
Take away my anger, Lord.
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One Day At A Time
SUBLIMATION
"People who are happy don't use food to
sublimate. Food is supposed to be good for
you - not make you feel good!"
Gary Null
All compulsive overeaters use food to sublimate. Sublimation in layman’s terms is any habit or technique we use to alter or change our reality - for better or worse! Sublimation methods of choice are a great gauge to measure mental and physical health. Poor choices are using food, gambling, television, alcohol, drugs, shopping, excessive sleep or too many passive activities. Healthy choices are meditation, visual imagery, prayer, journaling, yoga, physical exercise, relaxation exercises, deep breathing, etc. Anything from lawn mowing to vacuuming could be an act of sublimation - IF done with high level of awareness and concentration. A person who's high up the ladder spiritually sees Higher Power in all things at all times. Since we sublimate regardless, the trick is to make it a consciously controlled positive sublimation rather than subconscious negative sublimation.
One day at a time...
I will consciously incorporate positive, healthy methods of sublimation.
~ Rob R.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Highly competent psychiatrists who have dealt with us have found it sometimes impossible to persuade an alcoholic to discuss his situation without reserve. Strangely enough, wives, parents and intimate friends usually find us even more unapproachable that do the psychiatrist and the doctor. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Withdrawal is a condition that can last many months and produces chaos: chaotic emotions, chaotic thoughts, chaotic family situations, chaotic desires. But we take one step at a time, one hour at a time and the chaos eventually calms.
I know everything changes and the chaos will pass in these changes as long as I don't use mind-affecting chemicals.
Unseen Hands
There are forces in this ever alive and vibrating universe that want to help me if I can let them. I will pray to unseen hands to guide me toward wellness, to lift me towards God. If I am low, I will allow this legion of tiny hands to lift me in the blink of an eye. I will ask and trust that help is at hand. I will free my mind so that it can include more experience that it normally does. I will allow the veil to be lifted so that I can see this spiritual and alive universe for what it is and people for the tender and vulnerable creatures that we all are.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Don't ever think you have nothing left to learn in the fellowship and that everyone wants to hear you talk incessantly because you are so wise. You can not have an open mouth and an open mind at the same time.
When I do all the talking, I can only hear what I already know.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Reputation is what people think of us. Character is what God knows about us.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to accept live on life's terms.all of it. I am open to all I see, hear, think and feeling the moment, without resistance. I am opening to be fully alive and enjoying the adventure.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Alcoholism is a disease which tells us we don't have it. - Anon.
bluidkiti
04-29-2021, 04:55 AM
May 8
Daily Reflections
A RESTING PLACE
All of A.A.'s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural
desires . . . they all deflate our egos. When it comes to ego
deflation, few Steps are harder to take than Five. But scarcely
any Step is more necessary to longtime sobriety and peace of
mind than this one.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55
After writing down my character defects, I was unwilling to
talk about them, and decided it was time to stop carrying this
burden alone. I needed to confess those defects to someone else.
I had read - and been told - I could not stay sober unless I
did. Step Five provided me with a feeling of belonging, with
humility and serenity when I practiced it in my daily living.
It was important to admit my defects of character in the order
presented in Step Five: "to God, to ourselves and to another
human being." Admitting to God first paved the way for admission
to myself and to another person . As the taking of the Step is
described, a feeling of being at one with God and my fellow man
brought me to a resting place where I could prepare myself for
the remaining Steps toward a full and meaningful sobriety.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I'm grateful that I found a program in A.A. that could keep me
sober. I'm grateful that A.A. has shown me the way to faith in
a Higher Power, because the renewing of that faith has changed
my way of life. And I've found a happiness and contentment that
I had forgotten existed, by simply believing in God and trying
to live the kind of a life that I know He wants me to live. As
long as I stay grateful, I'll stay sober. Am I in a grateful
frame of mind?
Meditation For The Day
God can work through you better when you are not hurrying. Go
very slowly, very quietly, from one duty to the next, taking
time to rest and pray between. Do not be too busy. Take
everything in order. Venture often into the rest of God and
you will find peace. At work that results from resting with
God is good work. Claim the power to work miracles in human
lives. Know that you can do many things through the Higher
Power. Know that you can do good things through God who rests
you and gives you strength. Partake regularly of rest and
prayer.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not be in too much of a hurry. I pray that
I may take time out often to rest with God.
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As Bill Sees It
Back To Work, p. 128
It is possible for us to use the alleged dishonesty of other people as a
plausible excuse for not meeting our own obligations.
Once, some prejudiced friends exhorted me never to go back to Wall
Street. They were sure that the rampant materialism and
double-dealing down there would stunt my spiritual growth. Because
this sounded so high-minded, I continued to stay away from the only
business that I knew.
When, finally, my household went broke, I realized I hadn't been able
to face the prospect of going back to work. So I returned to Wall
Street, and I have ever since been glad that I did. I needed to
rediscover that there are many fine people in New York's financial
district. Then, too, I needed the experience of staying sober in the
very surroundings where alcohol had cut me down.
A Wall Street business trip to Akron, Ohio, first brought me face to
face with Dr. Bob. So the birth of A.A. hinged on my effort to meet
my bread-and-butter responsibilities.
Grapevine, August 1961
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Walk in Dry Places
Regrets over roads not taken
Releasing the past.
Looking back, every one of us can point to moment when we made choices that helped set the course of our lives. It’s easy to waste time and energy wondering what our lives would have been like if other choices had been made at these critical points.
Such thinking is mostly a waste of time and may reflect dissatisfaction with our lives today. Whatever our past mistakes, the decisions we made that brought us sobriety were the correct ones. Realizing this, many of us even come to feel gratitude for the problem that brought us into the program.
We are never able to say with certainty that different choices made earlier in life would have been better in the long run. Bill W., an AA co-founder, said that a business setback moved him to make the calls that led him to Dr. Bob, the other co-founder. Had his business venture succeeded, it’s doubtful that Bill would have been thinking about helping another alcoholic.
The best choice any of us can make is to turn such maters and questions over to our Higher Power. We have a duty to do the best we can with today’s opportunities and conditions.
I'll live today in the present. The good experiences from the past are always with me, and I can benefit from any lessons learned by my mistakes.
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Keep It Simple
The only way to speak truth is to speak lovingly.---Thoreau
Recovery teaches us to tell the truth. We must be honest if we want to save our lives. We must learn to speak with care---care for ourselves and for others. To be honest means to speak in a fair and truthful way. To be honest and loving means learning when to speak, and how to speak, in a caring way. We can help others by honestly telling them what we think and feel and see---but only when we do this with love. We must be careful when we speak. Speaking the truth is like using a sharp knife---it can be used for good, or it can be used to hurt others. We should never handle it carelessly of use it to hurt someone.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know the truth. Help me speak the truth to others with love.
Action for the Day: I'll make a list of three times I've hurt someone be being honest, but not with love. I'll also list three times I've helped someone by being truthful, with love.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The battle to keep up appearances unnecessarily, the mask--whatever name you give creeping perfectionism--robs us of our energies. --Robin Worthington
How familiar we are with trying to be women other than ourselves; ones more exciting, we think, or sexier, or smarter. We have probably devoted a great deal of energy to this over the years. It's likely that we are growing more content with ourselves now. However, aren't there still situations in which we squirm, both because we want to project a different image, and because we resent our desire to do so?
We each have been blessed with unique qualities. There is no other woman just like ourselves. We each have special features that are projected in only one way, the way we alone project them.
Knowing that we are perfect as we are is knowledge that accompanies recovery. How much easier life is, how much more can be gained from each moment, when we meet each experience in the comfort of our real selves. The added gift of simply being ourselves is that we'll really hear, see, and understand others for the first time in our lives.
I can only fully focus on one thing, one person at a time. I will free my focus from myself today and be filled up by my experiences with others.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Why sit with a long face in places where there is drinking, sighing about the good old days. If it is a happy occasion, try to increase the pleasure of those there; if a business occasion, go and attend to your business enthusiastically. If you are with a person who wants to eat in a bar, by all means go along. Let your friends know they are not to change their habits on your account. At a proper time and place explain to all your friends why alcohol disagrees with you. If you do this thoroughly, few people will ask you to drink. While you were drinking, you were withdrawing from life little by little. Now you are getting back into the social life of this world. Don’t start to withdraw again just because your friends drink liquor.
p. 102
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
He Sold Himself Short
I'm rated as a modestly successful man. My stock of material goods isn't great. But I have a fortune in friendships, courage, self-assurance, and honest appraisal of my own abilities. Above all, I have gained the greatest thing accorded to any man, the love and understanding of a gracious God, who has lifted me from the alcoholic scrap help to a position of trust, where I have been able to reap the rich rewards that come from showing a little love for others and from serving them as I can.
p. 267
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
About two weeks later, Ed stole by night into an A.A. member's house, and unknown to the family, went to bed. Daylight found the master of the house and another friend drinking their morning coffee. A noise was heard on the stairs. To their consternation, Ed appeared. A quizzical smile on his lips, he said, "Have you fellows had your morning meditation?" They quickly sensed that he was quite in earnest. In fragments, his story came out.
p. 144
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Remember To Live Your Life Today
Today is a beautiful day to be alive, to be the person you are. A beautiful
day, simply, to be. Don't waste energy trying to possess or control. Don't
let yourself be burdened by things that have happened in the past. Don't
worry about being "right," or about impressing anyone.
Focus instead on creating things that have never before existed. On
adding value to the lives of others. On finding ways to express the unique
person that you are. Feel good by simply deciding to, rather than by
abusing yourself or others. Look at everything that happens as an
opportunity for growth.
Accept and be thankful for the abundance that is yours. Dust off your
dreams and find a way to follow them. Life is precious and beautiful.
Every breath you take is an opportunity to live life to the fullest.
--Ralph S. Marston, Jr.
"Today, I will relax. I am being prepared. I can let go of timing. I can stop manipulating outcomes. Good things will happen when the time is right, and they will happen naturally."
--Melody Beattie
"We find comfort among those who agree with us; growth among those who don't."
--Frank A. Clark
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
HONESTY
"Where is there dignity unless
there is honesty?"
--Marcus Cicero
The cornerstone of my life today is honesty. It is the quality I most desire
in my life because I believe that with honesty comes a knowledge of God,
self and relationships. It is the key to my recovery from addiction. It is
the key to the meaning of spirituality. Honesty affords me hope for
tomorrow.
As an alcoholic I was a dishonest man. I was not just dishonest because
I told lies and manipulated the truth, I was dishonest because I refused
to risk the journey into self. My dishonesty was not about what I said but
what I did not say! Not so much about what I did but what I did not do.
My dishonesty stopped me from discovering my God-given dignity.
Today I risk the journey into self and I am discovering more about God
"as I understand Him". My level of honesty helps me to be happy and
relaxed with who I am today.
"Be still and know that I am God." In the silence of self-honesty may I
know myself.
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O LORD my God, I cried out to You, And You healed me.
Psalm 30:2
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and
supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to
God.
Philippians 4:6
. . .the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace."
Romans 8:6
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Daily Inspiration
When we want things around us to change, the best place to start in within ourselves. Lord, grant that my frustrations can be a motivation to better myself and my environment.
Tragedy and suffering often opens the soul to the heights of spiritual growth. Lord, let the hardships of my life be my prayer and work to draw You closer and closer.
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NA Just For Today
Teachable
"We have learned that it is okay to not know all the answers, for then we are teachable and can learn to live our new life successfully."
Basic Text, p. 93
In a way, addiction is a great teacher. And if addiction teaches us nothing else, it will teach us humility. We hear it said that it took our very best thinking to get to NA. Now that we're here, we're here to learn.
The NA Fellowship is a wonderful learning environment for the recovering addict. We aren't made to feel stupid at meetings. Instead, we find others who've been exactly where we've been and who've found a way out. All we have to do is admit that we don't have all the answers, then listen as others share what's worked for them.
As recovering addicts and as human beings, we have much to learn. Other addicts—and other humans—have much to teach us about what works and what doesn't. As long as we remain teachable, we can take advantage of the experience of others.
Just for today: I will admit that I don't have all the answers. I will look and listen to the experience of others for the answers I need.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Talking little, and with the low, tender part of our voices, as in nodding to one who already knows what you mean. --Tess Gallagher
Once there was a small child whose only word was no. When she wanted to indicate yes, she nodded her head emphatically. What she liked to do instead of talk was play. She liked to play outside in the meadow with the bugs and rocks and plants.
The mullein was her favorite plant. She rubbed the soft, furry leaves across her cheek. Her mother told her that in the old days, American Indians used these leaves as bandages. Several years later, Lucy picked a mullein leaf and took it in the house to her mother. "Look, Mama. Indian owee."
We, too, can remember some surprising things from the dim past, before we could talk or understand all that went on around us. Communication does not always depend on words alone but on the tenderness with which they are spoken. Walking through the world in a tender, loving way is a form of communication that goes beyond words to our deepest feelings.
What are some of the ways we show our love without words?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes they forgive them. --Oscar Wilde
The mature man eventually forgives his parents. Any adult can look back and see childhood wrongs and unfairness. Many of us were disappointed by our parents, even neglected or hurt by them. We certainly didn't get all we wanted or needed. Yet, upon joining the ranks of grown men and women, we become responsible for ourselves. Every situation has limited choices, and we work with what we've got. As adults, we realize this is exactly where our parents were when we were children. They, too, were born into an imperfect world and had to do the best they could.
When we can forgive our parents, we are free to accept them as they are, as we might a friend. We can accept them, enjoy the relationship, and forget about collecting old debts. Making peace with them imparts to us the strengths of previous generations and helps us be more at peace with ourselves.
I pray for the maturity and the wisdom to be more forgiving of my parents.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The battle to keep up appearances unnecessarily, the mask--whatever name you give creeping perfectionism--robs us of our energies. --Robin Worthington
How familiar we are with trying to be women other than ourselves; ones more exciting, we think, or sexier, or smarter. We have probably devoted a great deal of energy to this over the years. It's likely that we are growing more content with ourselves now. However, aren't there still situations in which we squirm, both because we want to project a different image, and because we resent our desire to do so?
We each have been blessed with unique qualities. There is no other woman just like ourselves. We each have special features that are projected in only one way, the way we alone project them.
Knowing that we are perfect as we are is knowledge that accompanies recovery. How much easier life is, how much more can be gained from each moment, when we meet each experience in the comfort of our real selves. The added gift of simply being ourselves is that we'll really hear, see, and understand others for the first time in our lives.
I can only fully focus on one thing, one person at a time. I will free my focus from myself today and be filled up by my experiences with others.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Giving Ourselves What We Deserve
I worked at a good job, making a decent salary. I had been recovering for years. Each morning, I got into my car and I thanked God for the car. The heater didn't work. And the chance of the car not starting was almost as great as the chance that it would. I just kept suffering through, and thanking God. One day, it occurred to me that there was absolutely no good reason I couldn't buy myself a new car - that moment - if I wanted one. I had been gratitude-ing myself into unnecessary deprivation and martyrdom. I bought the new car - that day. --Anonymous
Often, our instinctive reaction to something we want or need, No! I can't afford it!
The question we can learn to ask ourselves is, But, can I?
Many of us have learned to habitually deprive ourselves of anything we might want, and often things we need.
Sometimes, we can misuse the concept of gratitude to keep ourselves unnecessarily deprived.
Gratitude for what we have is an important recovery concept. So is believing we deserve the best and making an effort to stop depriving ourselves and start treating ourselves well.
There is nothing wrong with buying ourselves what we want when we can afford to do that. Learn to trust and listen to yourself about what you want. There's nothing wrong with buying yourself a treat, buying yourself something new.
There are times when it is good to wait. There are times when we legitimately cannot afford a luxury. But there are many times when we can.
Today, I will combine the principles of gratitude for what I have with the belief that I deserve the best. If there is no good reason to deprive myself, I wont.
I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Love Yourself
No matter what, love yourself.
Love yourself, even if it feels like the world around you is irked with you, even if it feels like those you’ve counted on most have gone away, even if you wonder if God has abandoned you.
When it feels like the journey has stopped, the magic is gone, and you’ve been left sitting on the curb, love yourself. When you’re confused and angry about how things are going or how they’ve gone, love yourself. No matter what happens or where you are, love yourself. No matter if you aren’t certain where you’re going or if there’s anyplace left to go, love yourself.
This situation will change, this time will pass, and the magic will return. So will joy and faith. You will feel connected again– to yourself, God, the universe, and life. But the first thing to do is love yourself. And all the good you want will follow.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Say when something triggers you
How do you defend yourself when you feel angry and hurt?
When Sally was a child, she lived with disturbed parents. They said mean, hurtful things to her much of the time. She wasn’t allowed to say anything back, and she especially wasn’t allowed to say how angry and hurt she felt.
“The only way I could deal with anger was by going numb and telling myself I didn’t care– that the relationship wasn’t important,” Sally said. “Then I carried this behavior into my adult life. I learned to just go cold when I felt angry or hurt. I automatically shut down and pushed people away. One hint of feeling hurt or angry, and boom– I was gone.”
It’s important to know our boundaries. It’s even more important not to allow people to be reckless with our hearts. It’s also important to know how hurt and anger trigger our defenses.
Do you have an instant reaction, not to other people, but to your own feelings of being betrayed, hurt, or angered? Do you shut down? Lose your self-esteem? Do you “go away” from yourself or others? Do you counterattack?
Feelings of hurt and anger will arise in the course of most relationships. Sometimes when we feel that way, it’s a warning that we need to beware. Other times it’s a minor incident, something that can be worked out. You may have needed to protect yourself once, a long time ago. But now it’s okay to be vulnerable and let yourself feel what you feel.
Say when something triggers you and learn how you defend yourself.
God, help me become aware of how I protect myself when I feel hurt, angry, and attacked. Give me the courage to be vulnerable and learn new ways of taking care of myself.
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The Power Within
Energy 101 by Madisyn Taylor
Energy cannot be destroyed, but it be changed and transformed.
There is an undercurrent of energy thrumming through the Universe. Like the wind or a whisper, we can sometimes hear it and often feel it. Most of the time, we sense this energy unconsciously without any tangible proof it is really there. Thoughts, emotions, and the life force in all living things are forms of this kind of energy. So are creativity, growth, and change. The impressions, images, and vague premonitions we get about people and situations are other examples of formless energy. When you enter a space and feel an “intangible tension” in the air that gives you a sense of foreboding in your gut, what you are likely experiencing is energy.
Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed or transferred from one person, thing, or source to another. Though energy is formless, it does take form and shape in the way it flows and resides within all things: a grain of sand, a bird, a stone, and an ocean wave. Living things radiate complex vibrations while nonliving things’ vibrations are simpler. Energy is a magnifier that can attract like energies while repelling disparate ones. Many of our reactions to people and circumstances are based on unconscious reactions to their energies. We may even intuitively tune into the energy of a situation we are facing when making a decision about how to proceed. With careful practice and meditation, we can learn to sense the energy within other living things and ourselves. We can also become more attuned to how we are impacted by different kinds of energy. For instance, being around too many energies can leave one person feeling edgy or excited, while another person will fe! el tired and drained.
While some people feel that energy can be controlled, others see it is as the unknowable force that moves through all things. The combined energy in all things plays a hand in birth, death, growth, movement, and stillness. Practitioners of Aikido believe that all living beings share a common energy source that is our life force. Whatever your beliefs, it is worthwhile to explore the roles energy plays in your life so you can understand it more fully. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I’ve learned in The Program that I need not apologize to anyone for depending upon God as I understand Him. In fact, I now have good reason to disbelieve those who think spirituality is the way of weakness. For me, it is the way of strength. The verdict of the ages is that men and women of faith seldom lack courage. they trust their God. So I never apologize for my belief in Him, but, instead, I try to let Him demonstrate, through me and those around me, what He can do. Do I walk as I talk?
Today I Pray
May my faith be confirmed as I see how God has worked through others since the beginning of time. May I see that the brave ones, the miracle-workers, the happy people are those who have professed their spirituality. May I see, even now as I look around, how God works through those who believe in Him.
Today I Will Remember
To Watch God at Work.
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One More Day
Leisure is the most challenging responsibility a man can be offered.
– William Russell
We are a work-oriented society. As children, we were taught to do our homework and the chores. We may have “played house” or pretended we were “going to work.”
Play, therefor, can be a real challenge, especially for adults. Keyed up from a day in the work force or a day coping with the rigors of illness or pain, we can hardly settle down when busy thoughts crowd our consciousness. Leisure time can be a burden to us if we don’t’ know how to creatively fill it.
Regardless of what our job is, at home or away, we can learn to set it aside when work is over. Playtime should become sacred, for it’s a special time when we feed our need to be carefree and spontaneous.
Using my leisure time for play will keep me healthier, mentally and physically.
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Food For Thought
Fake Pride
Our pride often gets in the way of our recovery. Not the good kind of pride, the self-respect which belongs to all of us as God's children, but the false pride is what trips us up.
We are falsely proud when we think we can "go it alone," when we recognize no authority higher than our own ego. We are falsely proud when we refuse to ask for help or follow directions. False pride is involved whenever we consider ourselves better than someone else.
As soon as we start off on an ego trip, we are headed for trouble. Sometimes it takes many hard falls before we can give up false pride. Compulsive overeating guarantees that we will learn humility once we recognize that we are powerless over food and cannot manage our own lives.
When we conscientiously examine our motives for overeating and when we look honestly at the damage our wrong thinking has done to ourselves and those around us, we are on the way to getting rid of our false pride. It is something we have to fight continually, since this kind of pride has a way of springing up again and again.
Please forgive my false pride.
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One Day At A Time
POSITIVE THOUGHTS
“I’ve always believed that you can think positive
just as well as you can think negative.”
James Arthur Baldwin
What did I think about before I was in recovery? I worried about what others thought of me. I thought of what and when I could eat next. I picked apart the way others' bodies looked, while being jealous of them. I didn't know that thinking of negative things brought my energy level down. I thought self-discipline meant disciplining myself -- which meant mentally beating myself up.
My Higher Power has shown me a way of thinking that was new to me, but is age old -- positive thoughts. Thinking positive brings me to a level of serenity. When my mind wanders, I can bring it back. When I find myself obsessing over something negative, I can work the first three steps with it. I am powerless over negativity. I have a HP who can remove it from me. I choose to let my HP direct my thoughts. And then let myself to think of something else.
One day at a time...
I choose to think positively. The result is serenity.
Nancy F.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
BUT THE EX-PROBLEM DRINKER WHO HAS FOUND THIS SOLUTION, WHO IS PROPERLY ARMED WITH FACTS ABOUT HIMSELF, CAN GENERALLY WIN THE ENTIRE CONFIDENCE OF ANOTHER ALCOHOLIC IN A FEW HOURS. UNTIL SUCH AN UNDERSTANDING IS REACHED, LITTLE OR NOTHING CAN BE ACCOMPLISHED. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We often feel tremendous remorse for transgressions of the past. Today, at this hour, we can stay clean, stay sober, stay drug free. This is the beginning. Later in our program, we will work steps to neutralize our transgressions. But at this hour, we must heal our bodies first.
God, as I understand You, keep me clean and sober, now.
New Life
I can feel my body and my spirit trying to come back to health. I am breathing in and out with relaxed, complete breaths and with each breath I take, I feel more serene. I sense the life within each pore of my body and it feels good, it feels right, it feels alive. My body needed to fall apart a little, it needed to get my attention and tell me it needed tender, loving care. Today, I will pay attention to what my body is trying to tell me it wants and needs and I will give it what it is calling out for.
I listen to what my body is asking for and I do something about it
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
We are now learning to keep our thoughts in recovery and not in the insanity of the past. The program fixes it so we don't have to suffer from insanity anymore. Now we can enjoy it!
Crazy-making is what I make of it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You cannot think your way into right actions. You have to act your way into right thinking.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am letting go of all self-criticism today and changing all my judging thoughts to thoughts of love. I am becoming softer and more gentle and accepting of myself, making more space to feel joy and love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I had an unusual childhood....and a long one. - Anon.
bluidkiti
05-03-2021, 06:50 AM
May 9
Daily Reflections
WALKING THROUGH FEAR
If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us
be willing.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76
When I had taken my Fifth Step, I became aware that all my defects
of character stemmed from my need to feel secure and loved. To use
my will alone to work on them would have been trying obsessively to
solve the problem. In the Sixth Step I intensified the action I had
taken in the first three Steps -- meditating on the Step by saying it over and
over, going to meetings, following my sponsor's suggestions, reading
and searching within myself. During the first three years of sobriety I
had a fear of entering an elevator alone. One day I decided I must
walk through this fear. I asked for God's help, entered the elevator, and
there in the corner was a lady crying. She said that since her husband
had died she was deathly afraid of elevators. I forgot my fear and
comforted her. This spiritual experience helped me to see how
willingness was the key to working the rest of the Twelve Steps to
recovery. God helps those who help themselves.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We alcoholics used so little self-control when we were drinking, we
were so absolutely selfish, that it does us good to give up something
once in a while. Using self-discipline and denying ourselves a few
things is good for us. At first, giving up liquor is a big enough job for
all of us, even with God's help. But later on, we can practice
self-discipline in other ways to keep a firm grip on our minds so that
we don't start any wishful thinking. If we daydream too much, we'll be
in danger of slipping. Am I practicing enough self-discipline?
Meditation For The Day
In material things, you must rely on your own wisdom and that of
others. In spiritual things, you cannot rely so much on your own
wisdom as on God's guidance. In dealing with personalities, it is a
mistake to step out too much on your own. You must try to be guided
by God in all human relationships. You cannot accomplish much of
value in dealing with people until God knows you are ready. You alone
do not have the power or wisdom to put things right between people.
You must rely on God to help you in these vital matters.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may rely on God in dealing with people's problems. I pray
that I may try to follow His guidance in all personal relationships.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
The Way Of Strength, p. 129
We need not apologize to anyone for depending upon the Creator.
We have good reason to disbelieve those who think spirituality is the
way of weakness. For us, it is the way of strength.
The verdict of the ages is that men of faith seldom lack courage.
They trust their God. So we never apologize for our belief in Him.
Instead, we try to let Him demonstrate, through us, what He can do.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 68
************************************************** *********
Walk in Dry Places
The Importance of Hope
Maintaining Optimism.
As a great virtue, hope is ranked with faith and love. But those of us caught in the thicket of alcoholism and other addictions had much experience with hopes that turned out to be merely cruel illusions. In recovery, however, hope has a sound purpose. It is really a form of optimism, an underlying belief that things will work out in spite of the obstacles and problems we face. This helps provide the strength and energy we need to succeed in the face of opposition and setbacks.
We also own much of our recovery to the capacity for hope that was in our friends and family members. Henrietta D... wife of AA member Number three, told an interviewer that she had never lost hope that her husband would eventually recover. She saw it as the answer to her hope and prayers when Bill W. and Dr. Bob arrived at her husband's bedside in Akron's City Hospital... an when he left, he never drank again.
Hope is the optimism that keeps us moving toward our highest good. Let's keep it alive.
I'll face my day with the underlying belief that things will work out in the long run. I'll refuse to be overwhelmed by temporary setbacks.
************************************************** *********
Keep It Simple
The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.---Frank Lloyd Wright
For many for us, life was a burden while using alcohol and other drugs. As our illness went on, life was more ugly. We grew further from our friends, family, and Higher Power. In recovery, our eyes and hearts open a little more each day. We see the beauty that life holds. We now see the beauty that life holds. We now see that before recovery, we weren’t living---we were dying. In recovery, we again feel happy when we hold a baby. We again may feel joy when we see a sunset. This happens mainly because we've chosen to be with people who love life, people who've been given a second chance. Once we've almost lost something important, it becomes more precious. We almost lost our lives. Now our lives are special.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, thank-you for a second chance. Thank-you for opening my eyes and heart. Give me the strength to keep them open.
Action for the Day: I'll list the most beautiful parts of my life. I'll open my heart today to the joy in store for me.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
To expect too much is to have a sentimental view of life, and this is a softness that ends in bitterness. --Flannery O'Connor
Having too high expectations is a set-up for disappointment. Expectations that are high lend themselves to a fantasy life, and reality can never match our fantasies. When we get hooked on the fantasies, somehow thinking they are reality, or should be reality, we are vulnerable to the hurt that accompanies the emergence of "the real." Then we feel cheated--bitter: "Why did this have to happen to me?"
Having too high expectations was a familiar feeling before recovery. And it remains familiar to us, even now. Dreams and aspirations aren't wrong. In fact, they beckon us on to better and greater things. But dreams of what we can become through responsible choices are quite different from idle expectations of what will or should be.
Every moment of every day opens the way to my aspirations that enhance reality. I will be open and receptive to reality and its gifts.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most sordid spot on earth on such an errand. Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed.
p. 102
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable.
p. 268
************************************************** *********
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
In a neighboring state, Ed had holed up in a cheap hotel. After all his pleas for help had been rebuffed, these words rang in his fevered mind. "They have deserted me. I have been deserted by my own kind. This is the end . . . Nothing is left." As he tossed on his bed, his hand brushed the bureau near by, touching a book. Opening the book, he read. It was a Gideon Bible. Ed never confided any more of what he saw and felt in that hotel room. It was the year 1938. He hasn't had a drink since.
pp. 144-145
************************************************** *********
Without faith, nothing is possible. With it, nothing is impossible.
--Mary McLeod Bethune
"God's strength behind you, His concern for you, His love within you,
and His arms beneath you are more than sufficient for the job ahead
of you."
--William Arthur Ward
True happiness is not in having everything you want, but in wanting
everything you have.
"Some days I trudge. Some days I trot. But most days I enjoy the
journey."
"Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty.
Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to
keep your mind young."
--Henry Ford
"I know some good marriages - marriages where both people are just
trying to get through their days by helping each other, being good to
each other."
--Erica Jong
Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree,
but in the hearts of true friends.
--Cindy Lew
All yesterdays are canceled, and tomorrow is but a speculation, today
is the day God has made.
--SweetyZee
Practicing being in service takes the focus off ourselves and looks for
how we might help others. When we feel grateful, we naturally want
to share ourselves and our good fortune. Then we find that being in
service only increases our gratitude and joy.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
************************************************** *********
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
POETRY
"Poetry is the rhythmical
creation of beauty in words."
--Edgar Allan Poe
Language helps us to understand and communicate. Poetry adds the
dimension of "shape" and "movement". Poetry seems to go beyond
words and ideas to the very essence of what life is about; it hints at
divinity!
When I was drinking, I never understood the art of poetry. Today I
use poetry as part of my adventure into meaning and self-knowledge.
So much more is open to me in sobriety, and I am able to appreciate
things I never used to comprehend. Poetry is part of "it gets better".
Help me to seek You through all aspects of art.
************************************************** *********
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things
there is no law.
Galatians 5:22-23
Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows,
this he will also reap.
Galatians 6:7
************************************************** *********
Daily Inspiration
You can become more peaceful and a more interesting person by having a healthy attitude and accepting your responsibilities. Lord, help me to remember that life is what we make of it.
Take less for granted and you will become very busy enjoying all that you have. Lord, thank you for my blessings and for all those that I am able to share them with.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Write About It!
"We sit down with a notebook, ask for guidance, pick up our pen, and start writing."
Basic Text, p. 29
When we're confused or in pain, our sponsor sometimes tells us to "write about it." Though we may groan as we drag out the notebook, we know that it will help. By laying it all out on paper, we give ourselves the chance to sort through what's bothering us. We know we can get to the bottom of our confusion and find out what's really causing our pain when we put the pen to the paper.
Writing can be rewarding, especially when working through the steps. Many members maintain a daily journal. Simply thinking about the steps, pondering their meaning, and analyzing their effect is not sufficient for most of us. There's something about the physical action of writing that helps to fix the principles of recovery in our minds and hearts.
The rewards we find through the simple action of writing are many. Clarity of thought, keys to locked places inside of us, and the voice of conscience are but a few. Writing helps us be more honest with ourselves. We sit down, quiet our thoughts, and listen to our hearts. What we hear in the stillness are the truths that we put down on paper.
Just for today: One of the ways I can search for truth in recovery is to write. I will write about my recovery today.
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Planning is deciding what to change today so tomorrow will be different from yesterday. --Ichak Adizes
A house is like a lump of clay that can be molded and changed. It can be fixed and shaped, torn down and added to, painted, papered, carpeted, and panelled. We can think about how to change it, find pictures in books, and order plans. We can stock up on supplies, take fix-it classes, and get advice from others. But the house will remain unchanged until we pick up a brush, grab a bucket of paint, and get to work. Only then will we see tomorrow the results of what we did today.
Our plans help us construct a vision of how we'd like the future to be, but only actions will bring these things about. With confidence in the rightness of our desires, we can be assured that God never gives us a dream we can't reach.
What action can I take today to make tomorrow's changes?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I learned from them that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic striving, but it comes into us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness. --Brenda Ueland
We tend to be action-oriented and concerned about showing results in the shortest period of time. Our world has emphasized this outlook, especially for men. Now we are seeking spiritual progress. We are on a journey seeking a relationship with our Higher Power, with ourselves, and with others.
Spiritual progress is made by pushing aside busyness and efficiency. We become receptive to inspiration by allowing empty spaces in our lives, some solitude and idleness. This moment - right now - is one such time. It is not clearly goal-oriented. Rather it is a moment when we reflect on ourselves as recovering men. We become receptive to inspiration, to a deeper wisdom, to that part of life which we do not command.
I will remember today that spiritual progress comes only when I make room for it in my life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
To expect too much is to have a sentimental view of life, and this is a softness that ends in bitterness. --Flannery O'Connor
Having too high expectations is a set-up for disappointment. Expectations that are high lend themselves to a fantasy life, and reality can never match our fantasies. When we get hooked on the fantasies, somehow thinking they are reality, or should be reality, we are vulnerable to the hurt that accompanies the emergence of "the real." Then we feel cheated--bitter: "Why did this have to happen to me?"
Having too high expectations was a familiar feeling before recovery. And it remains familiar to us, even now. Dreams and aspirations aren't wrong. In fact, they beckon us on to better and greater things. But dreams of what we can become through responsible choices are quite different from idle expectations of what will or should be.
Every moment of every day opens the way to my aspirations that enhance reality. I will be open and receptive to reality and its gifts.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Learning New Behaviors
Sometimes well take a few steps backward. That's okay too. Sometimes its necessary. Sometimes its part of going forward. --Codependent No More
Life is a Gentle Teacher. She wants to help us learn.
The lessons she wants to teach us are the ones we need to learn. Some say they are the lessons we chose to learn before we were born. Others say they are the lessons that were chosen for us.
Its frustrating to be in the midst of learning. It is like sitting in algebra class, listening to a teacher explain a subject beyond our comprehension. We do not understand, but the teacher takes the understanding for granted.
It may feel like someone is torturing us with messages that we shall never understand. We strain and strain. We become angry. Frustrated. Confused. Finally, in despair, we turn away, deciding that that formula will never be available to our mind.
Later, while taking a quiet walk, we break through. Quietly, the gift of understanding has reached that deepest place in us. We understand. We have learned. The next day in class, its hard for us to imagine not knowing. It is hard to remember the frustration and confusion of those who have not yet caught on. It seems so easy . . . now.
Life is a Gentle Teacher. She will keep repeating the lesson until we learn. It is okay to become frustrated. Confused. Angry. Sometimes it is okay to despair. Then, it is okay to walk away and allow the breakthrough to come.
It shall.
Help me remember that frustration and confusion usually precede growth. If my situation is challenging me, it is because Im learning something new, rising to a higher level of understanding. Help me be grateful, even in my frustration, that life is an exciting progression of lessons.
Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Trust Each Step
Stay present for each step of your journey. We don’t go from one place to another in a gigantic leap. We get there in increments, by going through each feeling, each belief, each experience one step at a time.
Sometimes when we pray for miracles, what we’re really praying for is help in skipping steps, for shortcuts. The simple act of acceptance, of returning to each step of our path, can often bring us the miracle we need. Then we see the truth. The real miracle is one always available to each of us: it’s a miracle of acceptance. We can go where we want to go, one step at a time.
Stay present for each step of your journey. Trust each stage. Many things are possible for you if you accept that the fastest way is one step at a time.
************************************************** *********
More language of letting go
Say when it’s too much compassion
Sometimes, it’s easy to step across that line and have too much compassion for the people in our lives. Although compassion is good, too much compassion can cripple the people we’re trying to love. We understand so clearly how they feel that we don’t hold them accountable for themselves. Too much compassion can hurt us,too. We can wind up feeling victimized by and resenting the people we’re experiencing too much compassion toward. We’re so worried about their feelings that we neglect our own.
Too much compassion means we don’t believe in others enough to let them do what they need to do to help themselves. It’s a way of telling them, “You can’t.” You can’t handle your reality. You can’t learn your lessons. You can’t handle the truth, so I’ll treat you like a helpless child.
Too much compassion can leave us prey to victimization and manipulation. We’re so worried about how the other person feels that we neglect to take care of ourselves.
Here are some guidleines about compassion.
. If we’re creating a problem for ourselves to solve someone else’s dilemma, we’ve probably crossed the line.
. If we’re so worried about another person’s pain that we’re neglecting our own emotions, we’re probably over-involved.
. If guilt is the underlying motive for our behavior, maybe what we’re practicing isn’t compassion.
The lesson here isn’t to stop caring about others. Instead we need to respect other people’s right to learn their own lessons.
Too much of anything isn’t a good thing. If we’ve crossed that line into too much compassion, we can step back into the safe zone and use a lighter touch.
God, show me if I’m harming someone in my life– a parent, child, or friend– by smothering that person with too much compassion.
************************************************** *********
Family Ceremonies
Creating Connections while Apart by Madisyn Taylor
Create a ceremony around nature to connect with loved ones that are far away.
Life’s journeys may sometimes take us away from our families and friends, but there are many ways to stay connected. Aside from making use of the technology available—speaking on the phone or seeing each other from across cyberspace—we can create simple ceremonies using nature and our own thoughts to connect our hearts across the miles.
The first step in creating your ceremony is to look to nature for similarities in the different surroundings. The second step is agreeing upon something that is meaningful to all involved. If your mother loves birds, then perhaps each time you hear a bird chirp, you can think of her and mentally send love. You may choose the sight of a butterfly, the feel of a breeze or raindrops, or the scent of flowers to remind you of a special someone. The pink glow of sunset might be your favorite time to send a thought, or perhaps the warming oranges of sunrise. We can all see the sun, the moon, and an array of twinkling stars when we look to the skies. The monthly full moon may be your time to connect with your loved ones, or the first star you see each night, knowing that they, too, are gazing into the night sky and sending love. You could choose a day that you would usually celebrate together, such as a holiday or a solstice. If you once shared Sunday brunches in the garden, you can! each seek out a garden on Sundays. Or you can choose a specific time and account for the time difference in order to connect by heart and mind at exactly the same moment.
With practice, we may learn to recognize the feeling that comes when a loved one sends energy our way, and the feeling of soul-to-soul communication. In this case, distance may indeed make our connections stronger. There is certainly much to make us think of our close friends and loved ones often, but when we decide upon a reminder together, we create a simple ceremony of connection that defies any distance. Published with permission from Daily OM
************************************************** *********
A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“Perfect courage,” wrote La Rochefoucauld, “means doing witnessed what we would be capable of with the world looking on.” As we grow in The Program, we recognize persistent fear for what it is, and we become able to handle it. We begin to see each adversity as a God-given opportunity to develop the kind of courage which is born of humility, rather than of bravado. Do I realize that whistling to keep up my courage is merely good practice for whistling?
Today I Pray
May I find courage in my Higher Power. Since all things are possible through Him, I must be able to overcome the insidious fears that haunt me — so often fears of losing someone or some thing that has become important in my life. I pray for my own willingness to let go of those fears.
Today I Will Remember
Praying is more than whistling in the dark.
************************************************** *********
One More Day
The dark, uneasy world of family life — where the greatest can fail and the humblest succeed.
– Randall Jarrell
We carry so much emotional baggage from childhood into our adult lives. The sum total of all our experiences forms our personalities and , in the very essence of our being, our spiritual selves. Less often do the wonderful memories, the happier times, spring forward in our minds. The bad feelings, the sad memories, the hard times — these are what we may remember the most.
Who we came from, what we came from, shouldn’t define all that we can be as adults. There may come a time when regardless of our past experiences, we can acknowledge them, put them aside, and move on with our lives.
I can put aside my past by facing my future with hope and promise. I am looking for progress, not perfection.
************************************
Food For Thought
Self-Pity
"Poor little ol' me." The PLOMS. How often do we succumb to this temptation? Usually it's an excuse for not doing what we know we should do, but do not want to do. Or it's a way to manipulate someone else into doing something for us, which we should be doing ourselves. If we spend our time moaning and groaning about how unfairly life is treating us, we do not have much chance of discovering the plan which our Higher Power has for us, nor are we able to carry out His will.
Trite as it may sound, the cure for self-pity is to think about those who are less fortunate and start counting our blessings. Taking some action, doing some small thing for someone else, perhaps a phone call - these are constructive steps to take us off the "pity pot."
When we begin to feel sorry for ourselves because we must follow a food plan and may not eat spontaneously, let's remember where we came from and what things were like before we found OA.
I don't need self-pity.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
OPEN MINDEDNESS
Let go of your attachment to being right,
and suddenly your mind is more open.
You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others,
without being crippled by your own judgment.
Ralph Marston
Before joining this program much of my life was taken up with defending myself against those who would hurl abuse. I kept everything and everybody at arm's length in a bid to protect my increasingly fragile and sensitive self-assurance. As time marched on, and my disease became parasitical, the walls around me grew higher and isolation drew me inwards.
Ironically, the fortress I was building didn’t protect me from myself and I soon became my own worst enemy. My self-loathing and my unceasing search for perfection led me deeper into a self-induced state of depression. Keeping everybody out and locking myself in became an exhausting exercise.
On entering the 12 Step program I soon realized that the fortress I had so carefully built to protect myself against the outside world was also preventing any kind of light, warmth and love from entering in.
As my journey of recovery progressed, brick by brick the walls came down and afforded me the nourishment I needed to blossom and grow. In learning to accept myself, I found that what others thought of me paled into insignificance. I learned that there was a wealth of experience, strength and hope which would help me along the journey. I learned that I could take what I needed and put down the remainder, without the resentment, anger, fear or pain, which previously would have sent me running for cover.
One Day at a Time . . .
I aim to be willing to keep my mind open, to accept what I need to continue my journey, and to leave the rest.
~ Sue G ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
This is a 'We' program, not a 'Me' program. We do this together. Look at our steps. They all say 'We admitted' or 'We came to believe.' Doing it together makes us stronger and less likely to fool ourselves with dysfunctional ways of thinking.
Let me know that I am no longer alone and need never be alone again.
Healing Light
I am surrounding myself with healing light. I am inviting a warm, yellow/white light to surround me. I breathe it in deeply into all parts of me and I breathe out any lingering fear or darkness. Healing energy is quietly pulsing in and around me, imbuing me with a feeling of well being. I allow this energy to fill each pore of my body. This healing energy has its own intelligence and I become one with it and direct it towards those parts of me that need healing. I rest in this vibrating yellow-white light and let it fill me, surround me and make me well. Even the act of allowing this lifts me up.
I am filled with healing energy
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Few of us realize that God is all we need until God is all we have.
If I can't find God, I know who moved.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Rather than getting even with those that hurt you, the challenge is to get even with those that help you.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My sponsor said; 'OK, the only way to disprove a belief system is to adopt it. You can't stand outside the experience and say it doesn't work. So, for six months, live this program, really live it. And a t the end of that time if you say: 'It doesn't work, my life's still in the toilet.' Then I'll be happy to say; 'You're absolutely right, for you it doesn't work, bon voyage.' And I've tried that with a lot of guys and there's no way you can do that and say AA doesn't work - Because it does. - John L.
bluidkiti
05-03-2021, 06:50 AM
May 10
Daily Reflections
FREE AT LAST
Another great dividend we may expect from confiding our defects
to another human being is humility - a word often
misunderstood. . . . it amounts to a clear recognition of
what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to
become what we could be.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 58
I knew deep inside that if I were ever to be joyous, happy and
free, I had to share my past life with some other individual.
The joy and relief I experienced after doing so were beyond
description. Almost immediately after taking the Fifth Step,
I felt free from the bondage of self and the bondage of
alcohol. That freedom remains after 36 years, a day at a
time. I found that God could do for me what I couldn't do
for myself.
************************************************** *********
Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
One thing that keeps me sober is a feeling of loyalty to the
other members of the group. I know I'd be letting them down
if I ever took a drink. When I was drinking, I wasn't loyal
to anybody. I should have been loyal to my family, but I
wasn't. I let them down by my drinking. When I came into
A.A., I found a group of people who were not only helping
each other to stay sober, but who were loyal to each other
by staying sober themselves. Am I loyal to my group?
Meditation For The Day
Calmness is constructive of good. Agitation is destructive
of good. I should not rush into action. I should first "be
still and know that He is God." Then I should act only as
God directs me through my conscience. Only trust, perfect
trust in God, can keep me calm when all around me are
agitated. Calmness is trust in action. I should seek all
things that can help me to cultivate calmness. To attain
material things, the world learns to attain speed. To
attain spiritual things, I have to learn to attain a state
of calm.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may learn how to have inner peace. I pray that
I may be calm, so that God can work through me.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Our Problem Centers In The Mind, p. 130
We know that as long as the alcoholic keeps away from drink, he
usually reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that
once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something
happens, in both the bodily and the mental sense, which makes it
virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic
will abundantly confirm this.
These observations would be academic and pointless if our friend
never took the first drink, thereby setting the terrible cycle in
motion. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his
mind, rather than in his body.
Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 22-23
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Walk In Dry Places
Doing the impossible things
Achievements.
One of our friends became critical of our AA group, suggesting that we were limiting ourselves by focusing solely on recovery when so many other accomplishments waited on the horizon. After all, isn't it written that "with God, all things are possible?"
It is indeed true that we should place no limits at all on our Higher Power. Even nonbelievers will admit that nature and the universe show power and intelligence that are far beyond our understanding.
What limits us is our own ability to receive and use our Higher Power in proper ways. Even if our journey in the program gives us boundless self-confidence, we must always deal with our own selfish tendencies and the temptation to seek personal gain rather than personal improvement. Certain kinds of success can be fully as toxic as any drug. Some of us, in fact, can deal with disappointments more effectively than we can with too much success.
The Idea of "doing impossible things" is fully covered in the Steps. We seek knowledge of "God's will for us and the Power to carry that out." This means that we'll find the where-withdrawal to do anything that belongs in our lives. Anything else is needless and perhaps even dangerous.
I'll not feel that I lack faith simply because I haven't been able to reach certain goals. My Higher Power will show me how to balance my life so I can accept what is rightfully mine. There is no need to do the seemingly "impossible" unless it is in the order of things.
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Keep It Simple
As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.---Andrew Carnegie
Doing something with our lives, not just talking about it, is important. When we were sick with our addiction, what we did was drink or use other drugs. We only talked about what we wanted to do. Now that we are sober, we can really live our lives.
We've already done a lot. we've gotten help for our chemical dependency. We've facing the harm we did to our families. We've let other people into our lives.
Before recovery, we didn't have to tell people we were alcoholics and addicts. Our actions showed it, if people knew what to look for. Now we don't have to tell people we were recovering, because our actions will show it.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, let my actions show that I am getting better every day.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll let my actions speak louder than words. I'll do one thing that I have been saying I want to do.
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Each Day a New Beginning
To wait for someone else, or to expect someone else to make my life richer, or fuller, or more satisfying, puts me in a constant state of suspension; and I miss all those moments that pass. They never come back to be experienced again. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly
The steps we are taking today will never again be taken in exactly the same way. The thoughts we are thinking are fresh, never to be repeated. All that these moments offer will never pass our way again.
We each have to grab our own happiness, create our own richness through experiences. We may share what we capture with loved ones, but like us, they too must search their own avenues for the satisfaction that lasts. We can neither give happiness to another, like a gift, nor expect it in return.
The fullness of life we all long for is the natural byproduct of living every moment as fully as possible. Our higher power will never direct us into waters too deep. When we have willingly turned our lives and our wills over, we'll find an abundance of the rich, the full, the satisfying. Faith in God answers all questions, solves all problems.
I will cherish every moment today. Each one is special and will not visit me again.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Many of us keep liquor in our homes. We often need it to carry green recruits through a severe hangover. Some of us still serve it to our friends provided they are not alcoholic. But some of us think we should not serve liquor to anyone. We never argue this question. We feel that each family, in the light of their own circumstances, ought to decide for themselves.
pp. 102-103
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
I was a product of the post-war prohibition era of the Roaring '20s. That age of the flapper and the "It" girl, speakeasies and the hip flash, the boyish bob and the drugstore cowboy, John Held Jr. and F. Scott Fitzgerald, all generously sprinkled with a patent pseudosophistication. To be sure, this had been a dizzy and confused interval, but most everyone else I knew had emerged from it with both feet on the ground and a fair amount of adult maturity.
p. 268
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."
Nowadays, when oldtimers who know Ed foregather, they exclaim, "What if we had actually succeeded in throwing Ed out for blasphemy? What would have happened to him and all the others he later helped?"
So the hand of Providence early gave us a sign that any alcoholic is a member of our Society when he says so.
p. 145
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The bonds of matrimony aren't worth much unless the interest is kept up.
--Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES
No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.
--Eleanor Roosevelt
If I had my life to live over, I'd try to make more mistakes next time. I
would relax, I would limber up, I would be crazier than I've been on this
trip. I know very few things I'd take seriously any more. I'd certainly be
less hygienic... I would take more chances, I would take more trips, I
would scale more mountains, I would swim more rivers, and I would
watch more sunsets. I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans. I
would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones. Oh, I've had
my moments, and if I had to do it all over again, I'd have many more of
them, in fact I'd try not to have anything else, just moments, one after
another, instead of living so many years ahead of my day. If I had it to do
all over again, I'd travel lighter, much lighter than I have. I would start
barefoot earlier in the spring, and I'd stay that way later in the fall. and I
would ride more merry-go-rounds, and catch more gold rings, and greet
more people and pick more flowers and dance more often...
--Jose Luis Borges
"Cease to inquire what the future has in store, and take as a gift
whatever the day brings forth."
--Horace
Today, I will have some fun with life, with recovery, with people, and
with my day.
--The Language Of Letting Go
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CREATIVITY
"When one is painting, one does
not think."
--Raphael Sanzio
An artist is predominantly a person who feels rather than thinks; he is
molding his most inner experiences into the finished product.
I am doing the same in my sobriety. Today I am molding something good
and wholesome from a life that was negative and destructive. I am
rediscovering God, not just in thoughts and ideas, but in the daily
happenings of my life. God is not only an idea but He is alive in my
relationships, behavior and daily acts of kindness.
God is a process in which I am involved. He is at the center of my life,
regardless of the ordinariness of the event. Art is part of my life because
I am a creative human being.
Teach me to look beyond the painting into myself.
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Do everything without complaining or arguing. . .
Phillipians 2:14
Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.
Colossians 4:2
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under
heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to
uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time
to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time
to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to
embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a
time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to
mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to
hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
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Daily Inspiration
If you find only defects when you look into a mirror, you are definately missing something. Lord, may I take comfort in my good points and use them as a foundation to grow.
God did not talk about how much He loves us. He showed us by sending us His Son. Lord, may I learn to love selflessly and speak through my actions.
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NA Just For Today
Becoming Entirely Ready
"We... get a good look at what these defects are doing to our lives. We begin to long for freedom from these defects."
Basic Text, p. 33
Becoming entirely ready to have our defects of character removed can be a long process, often taking place over the course of a lifetime. Our state of readiness grows in direct proportion to our awareness of these defects and the destruction they cause.
We may have trouble seeing the devastation our defects are inflicting on our lives and the lives of those around us. If this is the case, we would do well to ask our Higher Power to reveal those flaws which stand in the way of our progress.
As we let go of our shortcomings and find their influence waning, we'll notice that a loving God replaces those defects with quality attributes. Where we were fearful, we find courage. Where we were selfish, we find generosity. Our delusions about ourselves will disappear to be replaced by self-honesty and self-acceptance.
Yes, becoming entirely ready means we will change. Each new level of readiness brings new gifts. Our basic nature changes, and we soon find our readiness is no longer sparked only by pain but by a desire to grow spiritually.
Just for today: I will increase my state of readiness by becoming more aware of my shortcomings.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
To apologize: to lay the foundation for a future offense. --Ambrose Bierce
"I'm sorry," said the blind man as he whipped the mare. "I'm sorry," said the mare, as she kicked the blind man in return.
"We're sorry," they assured themselves, as they pushed each other around again and again. Often, we push our troubles with other people around, creeping along in the old rough way, refusing to change because we're too involved to see another choice.
There's little sorrow in being sorry all the time. A true apology doesn't try to explain. Sometimes a true apology just breaks down and cries. Then maybe we're ready to go on--take someone by the hand, tell the whole sad truth, and work to find a better way.
Are my apologies excuses, or requests to be forgiven?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
"You are accepted!" ... accepted by that which is greater than you and the name of which you do not know. Do not ask the name now, perhaps you will know it later. Do not try to do anything, perhaps later you will do much. Do not seek for anything, do not perform anything, do not intend anything. Simply accept the fact you are accepted. --Paul Tillich
New possibilities opened up when we accepted our powerlessness. These possibilities came to us from beyond ourselves. We can open ourselves to acceptance by being responsible for ourselves and practicing the Twelve Steps. We can't improve upon the message that we are accepted, nor can we nail it down. In fact, the very moment we try to impose our control over it, it begins to evaporate.
We can receive this message of acceptance only when we are humble and open to it. After learning to surrender in the First Step of this program, we are ready to yield to messages of acceptance.
I am grateful for the acceptance which has come my way.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
To wait for someone else, or to expect someone else to make my life richer, or fuller, or more satisfying, puts me in a constant state of suspension; and I miss all those moments that pass. They never come back to be experienced again. --Kathleen Tierney Crilly
The steps we are taking today will never again be taken in exactly the same way. The thoughts we are thinking are fresh, never to be repeated. All that these moments offer will never pass our way again.
We each have to grab our own happiness, create our own richness through experiences. We may share what we capture with loved ones, but like us, they too must search their own avenues for the satisfaction that lasts. We can neither give happiness to another, like a gift, nor expect it in return.
The fullness of life we all long for is the natural byproduct of living every moment as fully as possible. Our higher power will never direct us into waters too deep. When we have willingly turned our lives and our wills over, we'll find an abundance of the rich, the full, the satisfying. Faith in God answers all questions, solves all problems.
I will cherish every moment today. Each one is special and will not visit me again.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Enjoying the Good Days
Good feelings can become a habitual part of our life.
There is absolutely no virtue in the unnecessary suffering, which many of us have felt for much of our life. We don't have to allow others to make us miserable, and we don't have to make ourselves miserable.
A good day does not have to be the calm before the storm. That's an old way of thinking we learned in dysfunctional systems.
In recovery, a good day or a good feeling doesn't mean were in denial. We don't have to wreck our good times by obsessively searching for or creating a problem.
Enjoying our good days doesn't mean we're being disloyal to loved ones who are having problems. We don't have to make ourselves feel guilty because other people aren't having a good day. We don't have to make ourselves miserable to be like them. They can have their day and their feelings; we can have ours.
A good feeling is to be enjoyed. More than we can imagine, good days are ours for the asking.
Today, I will let myself enjoy what is good. I don't have to wreck my good day or good feeling; I don't have to let others spoil it either.
Today I am letting a power greater than myself remove all my fear. I am now free to look within for my answers. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Go for the Ride
Not all sections of the road we travel are smooth, paved, easy riding. We may prefer the smooth sections of highway, but sometimes the road gets rough. And the rough section can go on for miles and miles.
That’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’ve lost your way. It doesn’t mean the rough section and bumpy spots will lasr forever. You’re still on your path.
Relax. Wiggle your shoulders a bit. Get ready, for you just may be in for the ride of your life. Don’t try to ignore the bumps or pretend they’re not there. Not all roads are paved and smooth. Not all roads are meant to be. Slow down a bit if you need to, but don’t stop.
Accept each part of the journey as it comes. Let each stretch of your path be what it needs to be.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to stop sabotaging yourself
Jenny sat down in the comfortable armchair in the small, pleasantly lit office. The man sitting across from her looked like a normal, friendly man– not at all like she imagined a psychic would look. She relaxed and began to tell him why she was there.
“I don’t usually visit psychics, but I’d like some information and guidance about the relationship I’m in now,” she said. “The guy I’m seeing is a great guy. I’m really in love with him.”
The psychic didn’t have to be psychic to know that a “but” was coming next. He had heard the story many times before.
“But,” Jenny said, “he’s a drug dealer. But it’s only marijuana. And he doesn’t use himself. And he’s just doing it long enough to make enough money to start his own business. Go legitimate, you know.”
After rambling for a while, she stopped. “So,” she asked the psychic,” what do you think?”
“You don’t need a psychic to tell you to get out as fast as you can,” he said, giving her money back. “It’s obvious. The relationship is doomed.”
As in Jenny’s situation, it’s easy to see the ridiculously obvious faulty thinking in our friends and people we’re close to. Sometimes it’s harder to see our own faulty thinking and blind spots.
“I love her, but she’s married.” “I love him, but he’s a cocaine addict.” “I love him, but I know he sleeps around a lot.”
While many people enjoy the benefits of seeking intuitive spiritual guidance at some time in their lives, there are many times we can easily tell our own future. Stop sabotaging yourself. Listen to what you’re saying. Listen to the but’s, to the words that come out of your own mouth. Yes, some drug dealers do reform. Yes, people recover from cocaine addiction every day. Yes, people with long histories of infidelity do stop sleeping around. And some married people do get divorced and marry those with whom they had affairs.
Some people win the lottery– every day. But more people never win the lottery.
Sometimes we’re blindsided by events that couldn’t possibly be foreseen. Sometimes it’s easy to predict trouble. Whenever possible, save yourself the pain and heartache inevitably coming around the bend.
Stop sabotaging yourself. Be your own psychic. Listen to what you’re saying, and give yourself the same basic advice you’d give a friend. You may be the exception to the rule, but probably not.
God, help me let go of my blind spots, the ones that cause me to sabotage my own happiness and well-being.
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Healing What Hurts
Freeing Up Energy by Madisyn Taylor
The longer we sit on pain the harder it is to allow it to surface and begin healing.
Many of us are going through our lives aware of a well of pain underlying our daily awareness that we’ve felt for so long we aren’t even sure where it comes from. It almost seems as if it’s part of who we are, or the way we see the world, but it’s important to realize that this pain is something that needs to be acknowledged and processed. The longer we sit on it, the harder it is to work through, and the more likely it is that we will be forced to acknowledge it as it makes itself known to us in ways we can’t predict. Rather than waiting for this to happen, we can empower ourselves by identifying the pain and resolving to take action toward healing it.
The very thought of this brings up feelings of resistance in most of us, especially if, on the surface, our lives seem to be in order. It’s difficult to dig up the past and go into it unless we are being seriously inconvenienced by the hurt. The thing is, when we are carrying the burden of our unprocessed pain, sooner or later, it will inconvenience us. If we can be brave and proactive, we can save ourselves a lot of future suffering and free up the energy that is tied up in keeping the pain down.
There are many ways to do this, but the first step is to recognize the pain and honor it by moving our awareness into it. In this process, even if it’s just five minutes during meditation, we will begin to have a sense of what the pain is made of. It might be fear of abandonment, childhood abuse, anger at being mistreated, or some other long held wound. As we sit with the pain, we will also have a sense of whether we can deal with it by ourselves, or not. It may be time to work with a counselor, or form a healing circle with close friends. Whatever path you choose, resolve to go deep into the pain, so that you can release it fully, and set yourself free. Remember, it is never too late in life to heal what hurts, and there is never a better time than now. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
As the doubter tries to process of prayer, he would do well to add up the results. If he persists, he’ll almost surely find more serenity, more tolerance, less fear, and less anger. He’ll acquire a quiet courage — the kind that isn’t tension-ridden. He’ll be able to look at “failure” and “success” for what they really are. Problems and calamity will begin to mean his instruction, instead of his destruction. He’ll feel freer and saner. Have wonderful and unaccountable things begun to happen to me in my new life?
Today I Pray
Through prayer, communion with a Higher Power, may I begin to see my lfie sort itself out. May I become less tense, more sane, more open, more courageous, more loving, less tangled in problems, less afraid of losing, less afraid of living. May I know that God, too, wants these things for me. May His will be done.
Today I Will Remember
Be still and know that He is God.
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One More Day
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
– Mark Twain
It isn’t until we add many years to our lives that we realized just how good most of us had it at eighteen. We were, by and large, only responsible for ourselves. Hindsight is always twenty-twenty.
How nice for us that the hindsight we have developed over the years can be used to our own benefit now. We understand that it’s natural for older people to lead and to teach the younger ones. Paying for life’s experiences — joys and sorrows — hasn’t all been easy. We have earned the wisdom we have now.
Since I could not be wise when I was young, the wisdom I have gained with maturity will serve me well as I get older.
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Food For Thought
Habits
Habit can work for us or against us. We have given up a set of eating habits, which were counterproductive, and we are learning new ones which will work to our benefit. Some of us require more time than others to make the shift.
Each time we act according to the old, destructive pattern, we reactivate those negative habits. We need to abandon them completely so that they will atrophy from disuse.
Each time we practice a constructive eating habit, we reinforce our new pattern. Writing out a food plan, weighing and measuring the food, eating slowly, and saying no thank you to seconds and binge foods are a few parts of the new pattern. When these actions become habitual, we do not have to think consciously about them, since we perform them automatically. Our mental efforts may then be devoted to something else.
Appetite is largely a function of habit. The more wrong foods we eat, the more wrong foods we want to eat. The longer we follow a healthy, sensible plan, the more it satisfies us.
Teach me to build constructive habits.
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One Day At A Time
GOOD DAYS
BAD DAYS
Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thank You, God, for always loving and accepting me right where I am, and working with me, even when I am not willing to give You much to work with. It is so comforting to know that wherever I am, whether I am willing and open, or have once again shut myself off from the Light of Your Spirit, You will meet me there and provide whatever is necessary for me to keep on.
Thank You for forgiving me those times when I am not willing enough to put forth any effort--some days I just want to skate, God--some days I just want to wallow in it. Why else would I resist changing into what You would have me be? Some days I am lazy and comfortable just where I am.
One Day at a Time . . .
God, Help me to be willing to reach out to You, good day or bad. Keep me mindful that my conscious contact with You makes even the best day better, and the worst day tolerable.
~ Jeanine ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves. - Pg. 25 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Sometimes you might feel spiritually dead or emotionally empty. No matter how dead or empty you sometimes feel, believe us when we say if you keep coming back, you will feel alive and full once again!
Whether or not I believe in a Higher Power, I will practice believing by praying anyway--the worst it can do is teach me discipline, the best it can do is work!
Being Authentic
I will stop fighting with myself and give my mind, body and heart the rest and inner quiet that they are craving. I'm not going to rush myself into wellness or force my thoughts into a phony sort of gaiety. I will accept myself as I am and feel what I feel. Thoughts and feelings won't kill me. Resisting the ones I don't want to experience puts me in a constant struggle with my own insides. My random thoughts and feelings are trying to tell me something. If I turn away and refuse to listen, I only hurt myself. Instead I will let the adult in me listen to those younger, fearful or anxious selves that are bubbling up inside of me just as a loving parent would allow a child who is hurt to pour out all of their feelings knowing that the simple act of pouring, it in itself, the cure.
I am willing to know myself
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
If you rely on meetings alone to keep you sober, then you must find a 24 hour meeting. Meetings are for identifying and sharing. People in the meetings will tell you what they did and suggest what you can do, but they can't do it for you.
I can pray for a good harvest, but I still have to plow.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The first year is free.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will look for opportunities to continue to grow through seeing the beauty around me and in me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Between any two alcoholics there's probably one good brain left. - Doug D.
bluidkiti
05-03-2021, 06:51 AM
May 11
Daily Reflections
A NEW SENSE OF BELONGING
Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had
listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn't belong.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 57
After four years in A.A. I was able to discover the freedom from the
burden of buried emotions that had caused me so much pain. With the
help of A.A., and extra counseling, the pain was released and I felt a
complete sense of belonging and peace. I also felt a joy and a love of
God that I had never experienced before. I am in awe of the power of
Step Five.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We can depend on those members of any group who have gone all out
for the program. They come to meetings. They work with other
alcoholics. We don't have to worry about their slipping. They're loyal
members of the group. I'm trying to be a loyal member of the group.
When I'm tempted to take a drink, I tell myself that if I did I'd be letting
down the other members who are the best friends I have. Am I going to
let them down, if I can help it?
Meditation For The Day
Wherever there is true fellowship and love between people, God's spirit
is always there as the Divine Third. In all human relationships, the
Divine Spirit is what brings them together. When a life is changed
through the channel of another person, it is God, the Divine Third, who
always makes the change, using the person as a means. The moving
power behind all spiritual things, all personal relationships between
people is God, the Divine Third, who is always there. No personal
relationships can be entirely right without the presence of God's spirit.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be used as a channel by God's spirit. I pray that I may
feel that the Divine Third is always there to help me.
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As Bill Sees It
Obstacles in Our Path, p. 131
We live in a world riddled with envy. To a greater or lesser degree,
everybody is infected with it. From this defect we must surely get a
warped yet definite satisfaction. Else why would we consume so
much time wishing for what we have not, rather than working for it,
or angrily looking for attributes we shall never have, instead of
adjusting to the fact, and accepting it?
<< << << >> >> >>
Each of us would like to live at peace with himself and with his
fellows. We would like to be assured that the grace of God can do
for us what we cannot do for ourselves.
We have seen that character defects based upon shortsighted or
unworthy desires are the obstacles that block our path toward these
objectives. We now see clearly that we have been making
unreasonable demands upon ourselves, upon others, and upon God.
12 & 12
1. p. 67
2. p. 76
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Walk in Dry Places
Unfair People
Relations
Now and then, we encounter people who are almost blatant in their unfairness to others. We may make a 200-mile drive to a customer who is completely unprepared to see us, despite having had advanced notice. Or we may have a friend who is openly critical of our shortcomings while completely overlooking his or her own.
Unfair though these people may be, they give us the opportunity to exercise spiritual muscles. We can improve ourselves and the world by refusing to retaliate when such unfairness occurs.
The long-term benefit is that many of these unfair people change or fade out of our lives. As we handle such things spiritually, we recall times when we too were unfair, and we realize that such faults are part of the human condition. We are lucky people because we're being given the opportunity to raise the human condition to a higher level. We also hear that "life's isn't fair", it's just there" Not understanding life completely , we're not sure about its fairness. What we are sure about is that we value fairness and can show more of it now that we're sober.
I will not seek out unfair treatment today, but neither will I be upset if it occurs. If it does, I'll deal with it as another lesson in my spiritual growth.
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Keep It Simple
An honest man's the noblest work of God.--- Alexander Pope
Step five says," Admitted to God, to ourselves, and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." When we did this Step, the person we admitted our wrongs to didn't run away or reject us. That person stuck with us. Chances are, we were told that we are quite human. And working Step Five helped us to see that we can change, now that we're sober.
The most important part of Step five is the act of being totally honest about ourselves. Then we know that relationships---with our Higher Power, ourselves, and others---can be built. We have faced the truth. Now we know we never have to lie.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I know no Fifth Step is perfect. Please help me be as honest as I can in doing my Fifth Step and at other times.
Action for the Day: If I’ve avoided doing a Fifth Step, I'll talk to my sponsor about it today.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Bad moments, like good ones, tend to be grouped together. --Edna O'Brien
Rough times may be pouring in on us at the moment, and they may seem unending. Difficulties appear to attract more difficulties, problems with loved ones, problems at work, problems with our appearance. A negative attitude, something that we all struggle with at times (some of us more than others), is the culprit.
When the good times come, as they always do, they are accompanied by a positive attitude. We do find what we look for.
Our attitude is crucial. It determines our experiences. A trying situation can be tolerated with relative ease when we have a positive, trusting attitude. We forget, generally, that we have an inner source of strength to meet every situation. We forget the simple truth--all is well, at this moment, and at every moment. When the moments feel good, our presence is light, cheery. When the moments are heavy, so are we.
I can turn my day around. I can change the flavor of today's experiences. I can lift my spirits and know all is well.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witchburners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
p. 103
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
Nor could I blame my dilemma on my childhood environment. I couldn't have chosen more living and conscientious parents. I was given every advantage in a well-ordered home. I had the best schools, summer camps, resort vacations, and travel. Every reasonable desire was possible of attainment for me. I was strong and healthy and quite athletic.
pp. 268-269
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
AUTONOMY is a ten-dollar word. But in relation to us, it means very simply that every A.A. group can manage its affairs exactly as it pleases, except when A.A. as a whole is threatened. Comes now the same question raised in Tradition One. Isn't such liberty foolishly dangerous?
Over the years, every conceivable deviation from our Twelve Steps and Traditions has been tried. That was sure to be, since we are so largely a band of ego-driven individualists. Children of chaos, we have defiantly played with every brand of fire, only to emerge unharmed and, we think, wiser. These very deviations created a vast process of trial and error which, under the grace of God, has brought us to where we stand today.
p. 146
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"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keep out the
joy."
--Jim Rohn
What men and women need is encouragement. . . Instead of always
harping on a man's faults, tell him of his virtues. Try to pull him out
of his rut of bad habits.
--Eleanor H. Porter
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred
days of sorrow.
--Chinese Proverb
An airport is where you go to waste time waiting that you're going to
save flying.
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
I know that what comes to me today is a tiny part of God's big plan for
my life. I am not alone.
--A Woman's Spirit
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
PROCRASTINATION
"Procrastination - the art of
keeping up with yesterday."
--Don Marquis
Today I try to do all that I have set myself to do in a given day. I make a
list of things that I need to do and a list of those things that I want to do -
the things I "need" to do usually take priority.
This was not always the case. As a drinking alcoholic my life was
littered with promises that were never kept, intentions that were never
honored, appointments and meetings that did not happen. I pushed
everything into tomorrow - and tomorrow never came.
My understanding of spirituality involves a responsibility for those things
that I need to do. When I awake, I thank God for my sleep and I make a
silent intention not to drink today; then I face my responsibilities. I
separate my "needs" from my "wants" and I remember that I have a
responsibility to other people: family, friends and colleagues. Today I am
learning to live in my day.
Lord, may I do the things I should do and may I find time for those
things I want to do.
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"If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but do not have
love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic
powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and I if I
have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am
nothing. If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body
so that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is
patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or
rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or
resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the
truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things. Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will
come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it
will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophecy only in
part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end.
When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I
reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to
childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see
face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as
I have been fully known. And now faith, hope, and love abide, these
three; and the greatest of these is love."
1 Corinthians 13
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Daily Inspiration
Stand tall and smile often and it will be very difficult to be unhappy. Lord, may my disposition reflect the joy and peace that is Your Will.
When we give in to fears and worries they will take charge of our lives. Lord, I place my trust in You so that I may experience every opportunity and not miss in life that which is meant for me.
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NA Just For Today
Balancing The Scales
"A lot of our chief concerns and major difficulties come from our inexperience with living without drugs. Often when we ask an old timer what to do, we are amazed at the simplicity of the answer."
Basic Text, pp. 41-42
Finding balance in recovery is quite a bit like sitting down with a set of scales and a pile of sand. The goal is to have an equal amount of sand on each side of the scales, achieving a balance of weight.
We do the same thing in recovery. We sit down with the foundation of our clean time and the Twelve Steps, then attempt to add employment, household responsibilities, friends, sponsees, relationships, meetings, and service in equal weights so that the scales balance. Our first try may throw our personal scales out of kilter. We may find that, because of our over-involvement in service, we have upset our employer or our family. But when we try to correct this problem by resigning from NA service altogether, the other side of the scales go out of balance.
We can ask for help from members who have stabilized their scales. These people are easy to recognize. They appear serene, composed, and self-assured. They'll smile in recognition at our dilemma and share how they slowed down, added only a few grains of sand at a time to either side of the scales, and were rewarded with balance in recovery.
Just for today: I seek balance in my life. Today, I will ask others to share their experience in finding that balance.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I'm delighted that the future is unsure. That's the way it should be. --William Sloane Coffin
Some of life's richest moments are the most unexpected: the old friend met by chance, or the new one discovered when neither of us were really looking; the toy at the bottom of the toy box, rediscovered and loved anew; the book, the flower, the shaft of light we were in the right place at the right time to notice and embrace.
It is important to dream and plan, to work toward goals, to mark the milestones we pass on life's journey. No less important, though, is to open ourselves to the unexpected joys awaiting us every day.
Am I ready, today, to expect the unexpected?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
There is no shortcut to life. To the end of our days, life is a lesson imperfectly learned. --Harrison E. Salisbury
There are no perfect days. We have struggled hard against this truth. In our demanding ways, we haven't wanted life to be a process; we have wanted to reach a secure point of arrival. We have struggled against the dialogue and learning process of experience. We've looked for a "fix" and for perfection. Even now in recovery we long to "get it right." We continue to learn and to grow, but the lessons we learn are not the things we expected. We grieve the lateness of our learning, and then we go on to learn more.
As we grow in this program, we learn how to learn. We become more accepting of life as a process with no shortcut to the truth. We learn to engage in the process and accept that there usually is no right or wrong answer at the end of our search.
Today, may I accept the truth which comes from the lessons of my experience - and be tolerant of its incompleteness.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Bad moments, like good ones, tend to be grouped together. --Edna O'Brien
Rough times may be pouring in on us at the moment, and they may seem unending. Difficulties appear to attract more difficulties, problems with loved ones, problems at work, problems with our appearance. A negative attitude, something that we all struggle with at times (some of us more than others), is the culprit.
When the good times come, as they always do, they are accompanied by a positive attitude. We do find what we look for.
Our attitude is crucial. It determines our experiences. A trying situation can be tolerated with relative ease when we have a positive, trusting attitude. We forget, generally, that we have an inner source of strength to meet every situation. We forget the simple truth--all is well, at this moment, and at every moment. When the moments feel good, our presence is light, cheery. When the moments are heavy, so are we.
I can turn my day around. I can change the flavor of today's experiences. I can lift my spirits and know all is well.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Perfection
Many of us picked on ourselves unmercifully before recovery. We may also have a tendency too pick on ourselves after we begin recovery.
If I was really recovering, I wouldn't be doing that again . . .. I should be further along than I am. These are statements that we indulge in when were feeling shame. We don't need to treat ourselves that way. There is no benefit.
Remember, shame blocks us. But self-love and acceptance enable us to grow and change. If we truly have done something we feel guilty about, we can correct it with an amend and an attitude of self-acceptance and love.
Even if we slip back to our old, codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, we do not need to be ashamed. We all regress from time to time. That's how we learn and grow. Relapse, or recycling, is an important and necessary part of recovery. And the way out of recycling is not by shaming ourselves. That leads us deeper into codependency.
Much pain comes from trying to be perfect. Perfection is impossible unless we think of it in a new way: Perfection is being who and where we are today; its accepting and loving ourselves just as we are. We are each right where we need to be in our recovery.
Today, I will love and accept myself for who I am and where I am in my recovery process. I am right where I need to be to get to where Im going tomorrow.
Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Love Yourself Enough to Relax
Our bodies react to the world around us– and within us– in many ways. Our bodies act like sponges– they can soak up healing energy or they can absorb and trap the negative energy of stress and tension. Some of us are so used to keeping our body tense and bound up we don’t even notice how much they hurt, how strained and tight our muscles are.
Connect with your body. Learn to tell how tense it is. Take a few moments throughout the day to see what hurts, what aches, what muscles are being strained. Although tension can affect the entire body, many of us have favorite places in our body to store stress, places that usually become tense, rigid, and full of aches. Necks, shoulders, lower backs are favorite traps. Become familiar with your body and where it stores stress and tension.
Then, learn to relax. Explore different options. Therapeutic massage. Self-hynosis. Meditation. Soaking in a hot bath. Sitting in the steam room. Exercise. Visualization. Taking time to do activities that bring you pleasure. If you make the effort to explore relaxation techniques, you will find ways to relax that you like and can afford.
If you’ve been soaking up too much stress, give yourself a break. Let your body start soaking up some healing energy,too. Love yourself enough to help your body relax.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to disengage
“Run, duck, hide.”
It’s a motto that has served me well, particularly since I moved to California. “It takes money and a car to live here,” a friend told me once. He was right. And those who don’t have money or a car may try to take yours, I learned soon after that.
Manipulations, scams, and disturbed people abound.
They can be found anywhere. And sometimes these people are not all that disturbed. They’re just going through their stuff, and it doesn’t involve or pertain to us.
Sometimes, it doesn’t make any sense to be therapeutic, helpful, or nice when other people are trying to dump their insanity on you. It will only get you in deeper. Using any rules of engagement will simply mean you’re engaged. Disengage immediately.
Learn when to use your social skills. And learn when it’s time to run, duck, or hide.
God, help me detach when immediate disengagement is what’s required.
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Rain
Cleansing Nature by Madisyn Taylor
On the next rainy day, imagine the rain washing away and cleansing your emotional body.
There are times when we might feel the need to wash away all of our troubles and call forth freshness into our lives. Since perhaps the most cleansing substance on this earth is water, we can think of the joy rain brings as an energetic bath, rejuvenating our minds, bodies and souls. Just being able to spend a few moments every time it rains to become aware of the healing powers water brings to us can renew us in so many ways. As we do this we will find that the more we appreciate the universe’s gift to us in the form of rain, the more we can see that a gentle rain shower is a strong reflective tool that has the ability to cleanse our entire being.
The next time it rains might be a good chance to experience the rain through all of your senses, allowing you to truly understand just how truly important each and every drop of water is. First, take a few minutes to look outside and notice how each individual raindrop seems to come down in a continual stream. By noticing this you can contemplate how it takes many small accomplishments to create the whole of your existence, for nothing exists in isolation. Then you might wish to focus your attention on the sound of the rainfall, letting the sounds of drops penetrate into the innermost recesses of your self. Listening in this way may bring you a greater sense of connection with nature and the world around you, knowing that the sounds you hear are an integral part of not just the physical sustenance you require but also nourish your spirit as well.
Consciously using our senses to feel nature’s healing energy as it comes to us in the form of rain is an act of internal cleansing. Just as the rain physically washes over the earth and rinses out any impurities and imperfections, so it also bathes our spirit in the joy that comes from knowing that we are in fact one with the world around us. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Now that I know I can’t use bottled courage, I seek and pray for 24-hour courage to change the things I can. Obviously, this isn’t the kind of courage that will make me a strong and brave person for life, able to handle any and all situations courageously. Rather, what I need is a persistent and intelligent courage, continuing each day into the next one — but doing today only what can be done today and avoiding all fear and worry with regard to the final results. What does courage mean to me today?
Today I Pray
May I tackle only those things which I have a chance of changing. And change must start with me, a day at a time. May I know that acceptance often is a form of courage. I pray not for super-bravery, but just for persistence to meet what life brings to me without being overcome by it.
Today I Will Remember
Courage is meeting A Day At A Time.
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One More Day
The emotions may be endless. The more we express them, the more we may have to express.
E. M. Foster
Like layers of paint, our resistance to expressing our emotions can be peeled away. Poor health may make us feel as though we don’t want to expend the effort anymore. We may have withdrawn within ourselves, isolated our feelings from risk or hurt or disappointment.
Right now might be a good time to take a long, hard look at ourselves. Are we protecting ourselves by not discussing our feelings or sharing our emotions with others? Not until those outer layers of fear, loneliness, and pain are stripped away can we get in touch with our emotions. Surprising as it seems, when we let go of our feelings and start to be totally honest with ourselves, we find greater and deeper and lovelier emotions to express.
I can openly express my feelings to those closest to me.
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Food For Thought
Body Signals
When we were overeating compulsively, our bodies seemed to signal constant craving. Now that we are practicing a sane way of eating, we find that our bodies are more responsive to what we put into them.
We discover that we are more satisfied with small amounts of high quality food than we were with vast quantities of junk. Our bodies function better and we begin to hunger for wholesome, natural food rather than the refined sugars and starches we formerly craved.
Before, we never had enough. Now, we eat slowly and give our bodies time to signal cessation of hunger. We finish a meal feeling replete and energized, rather than overstuffed and sluggish. We wake up refreshed after fewer hours of sleep.
Now we can accept periods of hunger before meals as good, rather than something to be feared and avoided at all costs. There is no law against being hungry at times - it adds to the enjoyment of our meals. As our bodies become healthier, we experience them with greater awareness and pleasure.
Make me responsive to the signals of my body.
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One Day At A Time
COURAGE
“The courage of life is often less a dramatic spectacle
than the courage of the final moment;
but it is no less than a magnificent mixture
of triumph and tragedy.”
John F. Kennedy
As a little girl, I often daydreamed of a knight in shining armor who would ride bravely into my life and rescue me from my fears and insecurities. This knight would be fearless; un-phased by fire-breathing dragons, deep dark caves, or howling winds. He would have courage where I had only fear.
The knight never came. I began to look for other rescuers in my friends, rolemodels, teachers, and church. Still I could not find what I sought. My fears continued to scream in my soul ... and I felt so weak. I turned to food in an attempt to silence the monsters in my belly.
Sometimes my fear and hopelessness were so desperate that I almost ended my life – yet something inside of myself stopped me from doing so. Something inside of me clung to life and eventually brought me to The Recovery Group.
In this group of amazing people I immediately noticed the courage they exhibited in confronting the challenges in their lives and in choosing to learn and grow from every failure and every success. I marvel at the courage with which they keep moving towards more and more healing, in spite of their fears.
They have courage in spite of their fears.
The open, honest sharing of dear friends in recovery has taught me that even I had courage all along. Courage is not the absence of fear;
if there were no fear, there’d be no need for courage.
Courage means making the choice to move forward in spite of our fears.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will honor the courage I have. I will thank God for giving me the strength to move forward in spite of fear. I will celebrate the courage I see in my friends and I will encourage them on their journey.
~ Lisa V.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Be determined that your husband's drinking is not going to spoil your relations with your children or your friends. They need your companionship and your help. It is possible to have a full and useful life, though your husband continues to drink. We know women who are unafraid, even happy under these conditions. Do not set your heart on reforming your husband. You may be unable to do so, no matter how hard you try. - Pg. 111 - To Wives
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction.
Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles.
Accepting Caring from Others
I will soak up any extra attention that I get while I'm not feeling up to par. Even if I don't need it at the moment, I will soak it into my pores and store it up for a time when I do need it. I will let the attention feel good. I will allow it to restore my faith in and affection for people. I enjoy the little things people are willing to do for me, going a bit out of their way, worrying about how I'm doing. It feels good if I let it. It restores me if I willing to feel good.
Feeling grateful for what is coming my way has a healing power all its own.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Don't let your starting point in recovery ever discourage you. Don't let your starting point today put a frown on your face. Anyone who gets to be an old-timer had to be a newcomer first. Smile and start.
My journey of a thousand smiles begins with the First Step.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You can change any thought that hurts into a reality that hurts even more.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today my trust in the overall and the long run is deep and is growing. When events and people do not act as I would like them to act, I reach deeper inside for my faith and let it comfort me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
No matter how bad things are, eventually drinking will make them worse. That's a flat out guarantee. - Cubby S.
bluidkiti
05-03-2021, 06:51 AM
May 12
Daily Reflections
THE PAST IS OVER
A.A. experience has taught us we cannot live alone with our pressing
problems and the character defects which cause or aggravate them. If
. . . Step Four . . . has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd
rather not remember . . . then the need to quit living by ourselves
with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than
ever. We have to talk to somebody about them.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 55
Whatever is done is over. It cannot be changed. But my attitude
about it can be changed through talking with those who have gone
before and with sponsors. I can wish the past never was, but if I
change my actions in regard to what I have done, my attitude will
change. I won't have to wish the past away. I can change my feelings
and attitudes, but only through my actions and the help of my fellow
alcoholics.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
When we come into A.A., looking for a way out of drinking, we really
need a lot more than that. We need fellowship. We need to get the
things that are troubling us out into the open. We need a new outlet
for our energies and we need a new strength beyond ourselves that
will help us face life instead of running away from it. In A.A. we find
these things that we need. Have I found the things that I need?
Meditation For The Day
Turn out all thoughts of doubt and fear and resentment. Never
tolerate them if you can help it. Bar the windows and doors of your
mind against them, as you would bar your home against a thief who would
steal in to take away your treasures. What greater treasures can you have
than faith and courage and love? All these are stolen from you by doubt and
fear and resentment. Face each day with peace and hope. They are
results of true faith in God. Faith gives you a feeling of protection and
safety that you can get in no other way.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may feel protected and safe, but not only when I am in the
harbor. I pray that I may have protection and safety even in the midst
of the storms of life.
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As Bill Sees It
Spot-Checking, p. 132
A spot-check inventory taken in the midst of disturbances can be of
very great help in quieting stormy emotions. Today's spot check
finds its chief application to situations which arise in each day's
march. The consideration of long-standing difficulties had better be
postponed, when possible, to times deliberately set aside for that
purpose.
The quick inventory is aimed at our daily ups and downs, especially
those where people or new events throw us off balance and tempt us
to make mistakes.
12 & 12, pp. 90-91
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Walk in Dry Places
Repeating the old hurts
Serenity
It's been pointed out that the real meaning of resentment is to "re-feel" an old injury. This means that we let ourselves feel again the pain we had when we were previously wronged.
Common sense tells us that this is a foolish practice. But with emotions like resentment, common sense can be crowded out. It is a rare person who can avoid resentment about matters that caused deep injury. Resentment is so much a part of everyday life. In fact, that it's considered abnormal not to resent a real wrong.
We've also been conditioned to believe that we're being spineless and wimpy if we don't become outraged by certain injustices and wrongs. There's a difference, however, between feeling strongly that something is wrong and being sullen and resentful about it. The first kind of feeling helps us remedy the problem; the second feeling simply intensifies our hurt. Under no circumstances can we afford resentment.
I'll make this day resentment-free, despite the currents of feeling and bitterness around me. "Re-feeling" old injuries is not the way to the happier life I seek.
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Keep It Simple
You can observe a lot just by watching. Yogi Berra
When we watch others, we learn how to "act as if." We watch a patient person, and then we "act as if we're a patient person. The result? Over time, we'll become a patient person. We watch how good listeners listen, and we "act as if" we know how to listen. Then one day, we realize we're really listening! We watch people who have faith, and we "act as if" we have it. Then over time, we become spiritual people!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me find You in the people and events of my day.
Action for the Day: I will "act as if" my Higher Power is standing next to me all through the Day.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Every human being has, like Socrates, an attendant spirit; and wise are they who obey its signals. If it does not always tell us what to do, it always cautions us what not to do. --Lydia M. Child
Our Spirit is our inner guide. And our Spirit never, never, gives us wrong directions. Because we're human, it's all too easy to deny the voice from within. Some call it conscience. And our behavior, maybe frequently, maybe occasionally, belies what our conscience knows is right. We suffer for it.
We are trying to be healthy, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Each day we can make progress. With each action we take, we have a choice. Our Spirit, our conscience, should be consulted. Right choices make for right actions that will emotionally and spiritually benefit us and the other persons close to us.
It's comforting to rely on the inner voice. It assures us we're never alone. No decision has to be made alone. No wrong action need ever be taken. A sense of security accompanies the partnership between each of us and our Spirit.
I will let the partnership work for me today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 7 - WORKING WITH OTHERS
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!
p. 103
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
I experienced some of the pleasure of social drinking when I was sixteen. I definitely like everything about alcohol----the taste, the effects; and I realize now that a drink did something for me or to me that was different from the way it affected others. It wasn't long before any party without drinks was a dud for me.
p. 269
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
When A.A.'s Traditions were first published, in 1946, we had become sure that an A.A. group could stand almost any amount of battering. We saw that the group, exactly like the individual, must eventually conform to whatever tested principles would guarantee survival. We had discovered that there was perfect safety in the process of trial and error. So confident of this had we become that the original statement of A.A. tradition carried this significant sentence: "Any two or three alcoholics gathered together for sobriety may call themselves an A.A. group provided that as a group they have no other affiliation."
pp. 146-147
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Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are
getting somewhere or just standing still.
--Lou Erickson
"Stop worrying. The bridges you cross before you come to them are
almost always over rivers that aren't there."
A person desperately searching for God is like a fish desperately
searching for water.
Principles of the Twelve Concepts
1. Responsibility
2. Reliance
3. Trust
4. Participation
5. Democracy
6. Accountability
7. Balance
8. Consistency
9. Vision
10. Clarity
11. Respect
12. Spirituality
"The way to develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and
encouragement."
--Charles Schwab
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RESPONSIBILITY
"Man must cease attributing his
problems to his environment and
learn again to exercise his will, his
personal responsibility in the
realm of faith and morals."
--Albert Schweitzer
God has created me to be a responsible human being and that means
that I must seriously consider the choices and decisions that could
affect my life and the lives of others. Today I understand that true
freedom can only be experienced within the restraints of a responsible
life.
For years I blamed other people for my drunken behavior - family,
bishops, job, world situations - even God! But the truth was that I
lived an irresponsible life around alcohol. I ignored the facts that
surrounded my drinking.
Today I make a responsible decision not to drink, and I also take
responsibility for my life. I cannot blame other people for the mistakes
that I made. My real freedom is experienced in my responsibility.
Give me the freedom to impose my own constraints.
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"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His
might."
Ephesians 6:10
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures; He leadeth me beside
still waters. He restoreth my soul: He guideth me in the paths of
righteousness for his name's sake.
Psalm 23:2-3
Truly I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you shall say to
this mountain, "Move from here to there," and it shall move; and
nothing shall be impossible to you.
Matthew 17:20
Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt
you.
James 4:10
"Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your
wings."
Psalm 17:8
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Daily Inspiration
Today do what you can and expect no more of yourself. Lord, I will feel joy in my accomplishments today and gratitude for the things I have to do tomorrow.
Praise accomplishes great things. Lord, let me be your instrument in touching lives and changing hearts.
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NA Just For Today
Living With Spiritual Experiences
"For meditation to be of value, the results must show in our daily lives."
Basic Text, pp. 45-46
In working our program, we are given many indirect indications of a Higher Power's presence in our lives: the clean feeling that comes to so many of us in taking our Fifth Step; the sense that we are finally on the right track when we make amends; the satisfaction we get from helping another addict. Meditation, however, occasionally brings us extraordinary indications of God's presence in our lives. These experiences do not mean we have become perfect or that we are "cured." They are tastes given us of the source of our recovery itself, reminding us of the true nature of the thing we are pursuing in Narcotics Anonymous and encouraging us to continue walking our spiritual path.
Such experiences demonstrate, in no uncertain terms, that we have tapped a Power far greater than our own. But how do we incorporate that extraordinary Power into our ordinary lives? Our NA friends, our sponsor, and others in our communities may be more seasoned in spiritual matters than we are. If we ask, they can help us fit our spiritual experiences into the natural pattern of recovery and spiritual growth.
Just for today: I will seek whatever answers I may need to understand my spiritual experiences and incorporate them into my daily life.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I would be honest, for there are those who trust me. --Howard Arnold Walter
Some of those around us seem to see only the good in us. They trust and respect us, even when we ourselves may not feel we deserve it.
A young girl once talked about her grandfather. She said, "He was the only person in my life who saw the good in me." She mentioned that she sought to please her grandfather and not disappoint the trust which he placed in her. He brought out the best in her because of the way that he looked at her. Each of us can be like this grandfather by focusing on the good in other people. We can use our spiritual eyes to see love, honesty, trustworthiness, and unselfishness in the heart of another. As we look for the good, we are doing our part to help create it.
Do I see the good in those around me right now?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
In my friend, I find a second self. --Isabel Norton
Our mates and close friends present us with another view on what it is to be a human being. In being close we lower our barriers and get a feeling for what life is like from that person's perspective. We develop a feeling of empathy for him or her, and we multiply our life experiences by participating with others.
Through our closeness to someone, we might be confronted by a new awareness of ourselves. We may see something about ourselves we don't like and could never have seen on our own. We may see how similar we are to our friends, or how different, or how common and human our problems are. While each man lives his own life, through empathy we are given another window on the experience of living. Having a friend is a rich experience which increases our wisdom about life.
I am thankful for relationships. I feel grateful that I am not alone.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Every human being has, like Socrates, an attendant spirit; and wise are they who obey its signals. If it does not always tell us what to do, it always cautions us what not to do. --Lydia M. Child
Our Spirit is our inner guide. And our Spirit never, never, gives us wrong directions. Because we're human, it's all too easy to deny the voice from within. Some call it conscience. And our behavior, maybe frequently, maybe occasionally, belies what our conscience knows is right. We suffer for it.
We are trying to be healthy, emotionally, spiritually, physically. Each day we can make progress. With each action we take, we have a choice. Our Spirit, our conscience, should be consulted. Right choices make for right actions that will emotionally and spiritually benefit us and the other persons close to us.
It's comforting to rely on the inner voice. It assures us we're never alone. No decision has to be made alone. No wrong action need ever be taken. A sense of security accompanies the partnership between each of us and our Spirit.
I will let the partnership work for me today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Intimacy
We can let ourselves be close to people.
Many of us have deeply ingrained patterns for sabotaging relationships. Some of us may instinctively terminate a relationship once it moves to a certain level of closeness and intimacy.
When we start to feel close to someone, we may zero in on one of the persons character defects, and then make it so big its all we can see. We may withdraw, or push the person away to create distance. We may start criticizing the other person, a behavior sure to create distance.
We may start trying to control the person, a behavior that prevents intimacy.
We may tell ourselves we don't want or need another person, or smother the person with our needs.
Sometimes, we defeat ourselves by trying to be close to people who aren't available for intimacy - people with active addictions, or people who don't choose to be close to us. Sometimes, we choose people with particular faults so that when it comes time to be close, we have an escape hatch.
Were afraid, and we fear losing ourselves. Were afraid that closeness means we wont be able to own our power to take care of ourselves.
In recovery, were learning that its okay to let ourselves be close to people. Were choosing to relate to safe, healthy people, so closeness is a possibility. Closeness doesn't mean we have to lose ourselves, or our life. As one man said, were learning that we can own our power with people, even when were close, even when the other person has something we need.
Today, I will be available for closeness and intimacy with people, when that's appropriate. Whenever possible, I will let myself be who I am, let others be who they are, and enjoy the bond and good feelings between us.
When I place myself in the hands and heart of my Higher Power today, I know that I will get my needs met. Only then do I trust that I will come from good and love, keeping the good of others in my mind and my heart. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Discover Inspiration Points
Sometimes, we become so caught up in the daily grind that we forget how much beauty and inspiration our world offers. We forget about the power of inspiration.
My favorite inspiration point in Colorado is a small stand next to the Royal Gorge Bridge, the highest suspension bridge in the world. The stand overlooks the gorge, offering a magnificent overview of canyons, mountains, peaks, and plains. In Bryce Canyon, the place called Inspiration Point overlooks massive canyons. From that vantage point, you can see delicately shaped spirals, in the orange iron color so prominent in the canyon, surrounded by the lighter sandstone and sulfur peaks.
What inspires you? Discover inspiration points– those high places of the spirit from which you can see more, see more clearly, see more beautifully. Spend time taking in a grander view of life. See how calming and inspiring it is. See how you return to life with vigor, enthusiasm, and passion.
Visit places that invigorate your soul, help you see the larger picture. Find places in your home, your community, your state. Look for that place in yourself, that sacred inspiration point within you, where your soul and heart see the larger picture, where you and your ideas come to life, where you make the connection between your soul and the world around you. Seek the power of inspiration.
Inspiration points abound. Open up. Look around. When you seek inspiration, it will come to you.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to save your own life
I jumped out of the plane, and my jump master followed close behind. This was going to be a fun jump. We were going to play Simon Says in the air.
He did a 360-degree turn to the right. I turned,too. He turned to the left, and I did the same. Then he did a back loop. Okay, I thought. Here I go. I jerked my knees up, but instead of back looping, I rolled onto my side and went into a spin. With each spin, I whirled faster and faster.
I tried to arch, the body position that would get me falling belly down and stable, and make it safe to pull my parachute, but my body movements weren’t working the way they were supposed to work. Maybe if I push my right arm out further, or maybe it’s my left leg, I thought.
My jump master watched me whirling like a fan blade. He tried to catch me each time I whirled around, but he couldn’t get ahold. I kept focusing on trying to stop my spin. Finally, he yanked my hand, pointing to my altimeter.
My God, I was getting low. In less then thirty seconds, I’d hit the ground and my life would be done. I’d be dead.
The moral of this story is simple. I learned it when I joined my jump master back on the ground. “What are you going to do,” he asked, “spend the rest of your life trying to gain control?”
Sometimes, it’s easy to get caught up in a situation. We get so focused on the details of figuring out how to solve a problem that we can’t fix, that we lose sight of the time. Our lives are whizzing by, and the ground is coming close.
Have you gotten caught up in trying to control something you can’t? If you have, maybe it’s time to stop trying to fix it and instead save your own life.
God, grant me awareness of what I meed to do to take care of myself.
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The Power Within
Energy 101 by Madisyn Taylor
Energy cannot be destroyed, but it be changed and transformed.
There is an undercurrent of energy thrumming through the Universe. Like the wind or a whisper, we can sometimes hear it and often feel it. Most of the time, we sense this energy unconsciously without any tangible proof it is really there. Thoughts, emotions, and the life force in all living things are forms of this kind of energy. So are creativity, growth, and change. The impressions, images, and vague premonitions we get about people and situations are other examples of formless energy. When you enter a space and feel an “intangible tension” in the air that gives you a sense of foreboding in your gut, what you are likely experiencing is energy.
Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed or transferred from one person, thing, or source to another. Though energy is formless, it does take form and shape in the way it flows and resides within all things: a grain of sand, a bird, a stone, and an ocean wave. Living things radiate complex vibrations while nonliving things’ vibrations are simpler. Energy is a magnifier that can attract like energies while repelling disparate ones. Many of our reactions to people and circumstances are based on unconscious reactions to their energies. We may even intuitively tune into the energy of a situation we are facing when making a decision about how to proceed. With careful practice and meditation, we can learn to sense the energy within other living things and ourselves. We can also become more attuned to how we are impacted by different kinds of energy. For instance, being around too many energies can leave one person feeling edgy or excited, while another person will fe! el tired and drained.
While some people feel that energy can be controlled, others see it is as the unknowable force that moves through all things. The combined energy in all things plays a hand in birth, death, growth, movement, and stillness. Practitioners of Aikido believe that all living beings share a common energy source that is our life force. Whatever your beliefs, it is worthwhile to explore the roles energy plays in your life so you can understand it more fully. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
My courage must come each day, as does my desire to avoid a single drink, a single tranquilizer, a single addictive act. It must be a continuing courage, without deviations and procrastination, without rashness, and without fear of obstacles. This would seem like a large order indeed, were it not for the fact that it is confined to this one day, and that within this day much power is given to me. Do I extend the Serenity Prayer to my entire life.
Today I Pray
May each new morning offer me a supply of courage to last me during the day. If my courage is renewed each day and I know that I need just a day’s worth, that courage will always be fresh and the supply will not run out. May I realize, as days pass, that what I feared during the earliest days of my recovery I no longer fear, that my daily courage is now helping me cope with bigger problems.
Today I Will Remember
God Give Me Courage – Just For Today.
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One More Day
Every day cannot be a feast of lanterns. – Chinese Proverb
Many of us sometimes feel as though our lives are boring, as though each day is too predictable and routine. I’m missing something, we may think to ourselves, or there has to be more to life than this.
It’s those times that we can remind ourselves to think of life as a journey. As with any lengthy trip, this one, too, has days in which the scenery is monotonous and uninspiring. But we’re moving; we’re making progress in our personal growth, an dour attitudes are improving. Routine is not a bad thing, and it can be a good element of our lives when it gives form and balance to our days. Routine is often what gives us the time and energy to tackle new projects or to make changes.
Today, I will enjoy the calmness of my life. Within this calmness, I will dream and make plans for making my life even fuller.
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Food For Thought
People Pleasing
If we are too intent on pleasing others, we may lose ourselves. All of us want and need approval from other people, but sometimes we work too hard for external admiration and not hard enough for our own self-regard. If we spend all of our time and energy trying to please others, we never find out who we are and what pleases us.
When we were overeating and felt guilty about that, we may have thought that we needed to do what others wanted us to do in order to somehow make up for overeating. If we didn't look attractive, we could at least be pleasing in other ways!
People pleasing, however, is not confined to those who are overweight. Many people try to find their self-worth and reason for existence in the impression they think they are making on the outside world. It is an easy trap for all of us to fall into.
When we find our center in the life of the Spirit, we become less concerned about pleasing others. As we grow emotionally and spiritually, we begin to discover our giant Self. Through this program, we can find out who we are and what is pleasing to the best that is in us.
May I first seek to please You.
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One Day At A Time
WORRY
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.
It's already tomorrow in Australia.
Charles Schultz
Worry...that's a topic I'm really good at! Since working the Twelve Steps, however, I am beginning to see some things about worry that, hopefully, will soon make it a thing of the past in my life. After all, why should I worry? What has worry ever done for me, except mess up my life?
I am seeing that when I am worrying about something, I have not turned it over to my Higher Power, and I am continuing to act from my own self-will. Or, I did turn it over to my Higher Power, but didn't really trust Him to take care of it, and so I took it back!
I had a breakthrough, just a couple of days ago, concerning worry. I was concerned about a decision my husband and I had to make and it was so far beyond my ability to see into the future that I gave up and prayed for help. Somehow I let go and let God. Suddenly a beautiful stillness and peace came over me. I felt calmer than I had in years ... very calm and still and at peace. I felt completely reassured that God was handling my "decision" and that God was completely competent to do so.
One Day at a Time . . .
I abandon worry. I let go and let God, and enjoy the serenity and peace of trust in God.
~ Lynne T.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face. - Pg. 44 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
You will probably misjudge and misunderstand many people and their motives for a time. The muddled thinking of early recovery has a way of making us take things the wrong way. Remember your vulnerability and that withdrawal distorts thinking. Don't be hard on yourself or those around you. Do nothing permanent for eight months to a year. This way your regrets will be minimized.
God, as I understand You, hold my tongue from uttering words and restrain my steps from moving in directions that I may one day regret.
Recall a Pleasant Moment: Soothe the Heart and You Soothe the Self
You can calm and nourish your heart by regularly meditating or praying. These activities produce the 'relaxation response' - a physiological state that is exactly the opposite of stress, a state that reduces blood pressure and increases blood flow to the heart. Many forms of meditation and prayer organically incorporate feelings of love, appreciation and forgiveness. Some traditional Buddhist practice use 'loving-kindness meditation,' during which they focus their attention on the heart and generate feelings of loving kindness for others and themselves. Not only does this create the feelings in your mind, but it creates them in the body as well. A form of such 'intentional heart focus' has been found by the HeartMath researchers to create greater coherence in the heart in as little as one minute. To experience the benefits of this 'intentional heart focus,' try the following next time you're feeling stressed: Take a break and mentally disengage from the situation. Bring your attention to the area of your heart. Recall an experience with a loved one in which you felt happiness, love or appreciation or just meditate for a moment on those kinds of thoughts and feelings.
Re-experience these feelings while keeping your attention on your heart. Let your breathing be relaxed and regular.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'When one is a stranger to oneself then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others.' ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gifts From the Sea 1955
I cannot touch others if I am not in touch with myself. I keep in touch with myself through Step Ten.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
The best things in life aren't things.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
When I place myself in the hands and heart of my Higher Power today, I know that I will get my needs met. Only then do I trust that I will come from good and love, keeping the good of others in my mind and my heart.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Say what you mean, but don't say it mean. - Anon.
bluidkiti
05-05-2021, 10:12 AM
May 13
Daily Reflections
THE EASIER, SOFTER WAY
If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking.
Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 72
I certainly didn't leap at the opportunity to face who I was, especially
when the pains of my drinking days hung over me like a dark cloud.
But I soon heard at the meetings about the fellow member who just
didn't want to take Step Five and kept coming back to meetings,
trembling from the horrors of reliving his past. The easier, softer way
is to take these Steps to freedom from our fatal disease, and to put our
faith in the Fellowship and our Higher Power.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In A.A. we find fellowship and release and strength. And having found
these things, the real reasons for our drinking are taken away. Then
drinking has no more justification in our minds. We no longer need to
fight against drink. Drink just naturally leaves us. At first, we are
sorry that we can't drink, but we get so that we are glad that we don't
have to drink. Am I glad that I don't have to drink?
Meditation For The Day
Try never to judge. The human mind is so delicate and so complete
that only its Maker can know it wholly. Each mind is so different,
actuated by such different motives, controlled by such different
circumstance, influenced by such different sufferings, you cannot know
all the influences that have gone to make up a personality. Therefore,
it is impossible for you to judge wholly that personality. But God
knows that person wholly and He can change it. Leave to God the
unraveling of the puzzles of personality. And leave it to God to teach
you the proper understanding.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not judge other people. I pray that I may be certain
that God can set right what is wrong in every personality.
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As Bill Sees It
"Privileged People", p. 133
I saw that I had been living too much alone, too much aloof from my
fellows, and too deaf to that voice within. Instead of seeing myself as
a simple agent bearing the message of experience, I had thought of
myself as a founder of A.A.
How much better it would have been had I felt gratitude rather than
self-satisfaction--gratitude that I had once suffered the pains of
alcoholism, gratitude that a miracle of recovery had been worked
upon me from above, gratitude for the privilege of serving my fellow
alcoholics, and gratitude for those fraternal ties which bound me ever
closer to them in a comradeship such as few societies of men have
ever known.
Truly did a clergyman say to me, "Your misfortune has become your
good fortune. You A.A.'s are privileged people."
Grapevine, July 1946
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Walk in Dry Places
Who's to blame?
Personal responsibility.
Unless we're unusual, we've probably accepted the widespread practice of blaming certain individuals and groups when trouble occurs. Most likely, we'll also have people whom we blame for our own difficulties: unloving parents, careless teachers, unfair bosses, and others on an endless list.
However accurate it may be, such blame-placing does nothing constructive. It really serves only to reinforce our bitterness and resentment, thus assuring that more of the same "injustices" will come to us.
The real truth is that we have no complete explanation for the world's individual and social wrongs. While certain individuals are admittedly guilty of wrongdoing, it often turns out that they've also been victims of cruelty or neglect. Our goal, as people committed to a spiritual way of life, is to reise above all blame placing while striving for improvement in our own treatment of others.
Though I may read and hear much to the contrary, I'll resist the notion that certain people or groups must be held accountable for the world's problems. I'll focus my attention, this day, on improvement in my own life.
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Keep It Simple
Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.---Harry Emerson Fosdick
Hate is like an illness. It steals our hope, our love, our relationships. Hate puts distance between people. Hate can give us a false sense of power. Do I use hate to make myself feel important?
Our program tells us to let go of hate. Hate and sobriety don't mix. Hate doesn't let us connect with our Higher Power.
Ours is a program of love and respect. We're taught that if someone treats us wrong, we still should be respectful in our response. Why? Because we're changed by our actions. If we act with hate, we become hateful. If we act in a respectful way, we become respectable.
Prayer for the Day: Hate is the drug of those who are afraid. Higher Power, help me to be free from hate today.
Action for the Day: It's self-centered to hate. Today, I'll read pages 60-62 of Alcoholics Anonymous(Third Edition) about being self-centered.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Your sense of what will bring happiness is so crude and blundering. Try something else as a compass. Maybe the moralists are right and happiness doesn't come from seeking pleasure and ease. --Joanna Field
We think we know what will make us happy. Seldom do we readily accept that painful moments are often the price tags for peaceful, happy times. Nor do we appreciate that happiness lives within each of us; never is it intrinsic to the events we experience. Because we look for happiness "out there" and expect it gift-wrapped in a particular way, we miss the joy of being fully alive each passing moment. How distorted our sense of happiness was before finding our way to this program! How futile our search!
The way still isn't easy every Step we take, but those fleeting moments when we can get outside of ourselves long enough to be fully attentive to the people in our lives, we'll find happiness. We'll find it because it's been there all the time. It flows between us when we open our hearts to give and to receive compassion. Being truly there for another person is the key which unlocks the gate holding happiness back.
I will let someone in today and feel the rush of happiness.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES *
WITH FEW EXCEPTIONS, our book thus far has spoken of men. But what we have said applies quite as much to women. Our activities in behalf of women who drink are on the increase. There is every evidence that women regain their health as readily as men if they try our suggestions.
* The fellowship of Al-Anon Family Groups was formed about thirteen years after this chapter was written. Though it is entirely separate from Alcoholics Anonymous, it uses the general principles of the A.A. program as a guide for husbands, wives, relatives, friends, and others close to alcoholics. The foregoing pages (though addressed only to wives) indicate the problems such people may face. Alateen, for teen-aged children of alcoholics, is a part of Al-Anon.
If there is no Al-Anon listing in your local telephone book, you may obtain further information on Al-Anon Family Groups by writing to its World Service Office: Box 862, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018-0862
p. 104
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
I was married at twenty, had two children, and was divorced at twenty-three. My broken home and broken heart fanned my smoldering self-pity into a fair-sized bonfire, and this kept me well supplied with reasons for having another drink, and then another.
p. 269
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
This meant, of course, that we had been given the courage to declare each A.A. group an individual entity, strictly reliant on its own conscience as a guide to action. In charting this enormous expanse of freedom, we found it necessary to post only two storm signals: A group ought not do anything which would greatly injure A.A. as a whole, nor ought it affiliate itself with anything or anybody else. There would be real danger should we commence to call some groups "wet," others "dry," still others "Republican" or "Communist," and yet others "Catholic" or "Protestant." The A.A. group would have to stick to its course or be hopelessly lost. Sobriety had to be its sole objective. In all other respects there was perfect freedom of will and action. Every group had the right to be wrong.
p. 147
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"God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers."
--Jewish Proverb
"When it comes to love, Mom's the word."
--unknown
"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have
trouble."
Laughter, like a drenching rain, settles the dust, cleans and brightens
the world around us, and changes our whole perspective.
--Jan Pishok
A big part of my "conversion" has been full acceptance of myself,
warts and all.
--Mary Zink
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ARGUMENTS
"Argument is the worst sort of
conversation."
--Jonathan Swift
Why did I argue so much? Why do I argue so much? Usually it is
because I feel threatened, angry, discounted or I am wrong and I do
not want to admit it.
Today I need to remember that discussion is the better path to follow.
I need to hear and understand what the other person is saying and
from where they are coming. For too long I have argued, fought and
produced enemies - today I wish to embrace the spiritual path of
serenity and reconciliation. Also, I do not want to hurt anymore.
Arguments hurt me. Arguments hurt others. I should, push and scream but
inside afterwards, I hurt. My program today allow my ego to be balanced and
restrained. I try to think before I speak. I consider before I react.
However, when I do get into arguments and say hurtful and painful
things that I do not mean, I am brave enough to say I am sorry.
May the God of peace, love and acceptance be seen in my
relationships.
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"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD,
endures forever--do not abandon the works of your hands."
Psalm 138:8
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we
will reap a harvest if we do not give up."
Galatians 6:9
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not
be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you
wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9
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Daily Inspiration
Our goodness is one of God's many gifts to us. Lord, may I humbly appreciate my good qualities and give thanks to You through my actions.
The value of each gift God gives us is doubled when we share it with someone else. Lord, may I freely give without expectation of something in return even though I know Your constant generosity.
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NA Just For Today
Onward On The Journey
"The progression of recovery is a continuous uphill journey"
Basic Text, p. 79
The longer we stay clean, the steeper and narrower our path seems to become. But God doesn't give us more than we can handle. No matter how difficult the road becomes, no matter how narrow, how winding the turns, there is hope. That hope lies in our spiritual progression.
If we keep showing up at meetings and staying clean, life gets... well, different. The continual search for answers to life's ups and downs can lead us to question all aspects of our lives. Life isn't always pleasant. This is when we must turn to our Higher Power with even more faith. Sometimes all we can do is hold on tight, believing that things will get better.
In time, our faith will produce understanding. We will begin to see the "bigger picture" of our lives. As our relationship with our Higher Power unfolds and deepens, acceptance becomes almost second nature. No matter what happens as we walk through recovery, we rely on our faith in a loving Higher Power and continue onward.
Just for today: I accept that I don't have all the answers to life's questions. Nonetheless, I will have faith in the God of my understanding and continue on the journey of recovery.
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May 13
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Talent--I don't know what that is. It's will. You dream a dream and then you build it. --Philippe Petit
Even the most accomplished pianists begin at some point by playing simple scales and exercises. With daily practice, their hands learn to find the correct notes and become limber enough to play well. They learn each new piece of music very slowly at first, until, with study and practice, they can play almost without effort.
In the beginning, the pianist only dreams of being an accomplished musician. This dream helps the artist through many hours of practice and study.
Talent is really the combination of a dream and the time spent building it. We develop our ability by devoting time to the skills that interest us. Like the musician, we become talented through daily practice--the daily building of a dream. By developing our talents, we develop who we are.
Who am I becoming today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might. --Marion Anderson
Because of our resentments we sometimes get tense. We say we aren't going to have contact with our parents until they do something we expect of them. Or we hold out on a friend because we want an apology for an injury or injustice.
Sadly, we become more tense, more limited in our own joy, by holding someone else to our expectations. Our lives can be much richer and more fulfilled when we let go of these expectations. We can let go of manipulating or drawing forth the responses we want. Our manipulations and pouting make life too boring and limited. No one else need stand in the way of our pleasure of being adult men.
Today, I will let go of my claims on others so I can be free to soar.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Your sense of what will bring happiness is so crude and blundering. Try something else as a compass. Maybe the moralists are right and happiness doesn't come from seeking pleasure and ease. --Joanna Field
We think we know what will make us happy. Seldom do we readily accept that painful moments are often the price tags for peaceful, happy times. Nor do we appreciate that happiness lives within each of us; never is it intrinsic to the events we experience. Because we look for happiness "out there" and expect it gift-wrapped in a particular way, we miss the joy of being fully alive each passing moment. How distorted our sense of happiness was before finding our way to this program! How futile our search!
The way still isn't easy every Step we take, but those fleeting moments when we can get outside of ourselves long enough to be fully attentive to the people in our lives, we'll find happiness. We'll find it because it's been there all the time. It flows between us when we open our hearts to give and to receive compassion. Being truly there for another person is the key which unlocks the gate holding happiness back.
I will let someone in today and feel the rush of happiness.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Property Lines
A helpful tool in our recovery, especially in the behavior we call detachment, is learning to identify who owns what. Then we let each person own and possess his or her rightful property.
If another person has an addiction, a problem, a feeling, or a self-defeating behavior, that is their property, not ours. If someone is a martyr, immersed in negativity, controlling, or manipulative, that is their issue, not ours.
If someone has acted and experienced a particular consequence, both the behavior and the consequence belong to that person.
If someone is in denial or cannot think clearly on a particular issue, that confusion belongs to him or her.
If someone has a limited or impaired ability to love or care, that is his or her property, not ours. If someone has no approval or nurturing to give away, that is that persons property.
Peoples lies, deceptions, tricks, manipulations, abusive behaviors, inappropriate behaviors, cheating behaviors, and tacky behaviors belong to them, too. Not us.
Peoples hope and dreams are their property. Their guilt belongs to them too. Their happiness or misery is also theirs. So are their beliefs and messages.
If some people don't like themselves, that is their choice. Other peoples choices are their property, not ours.
What people choose to say and do is their business.
What is our property? Our property includes our behaviors, problems, feelings, happiness, misery, choices, and messages; our ability to love, care, and nurture; our thoughts, our denial, our hopes and dreams for ourselves. Whether we allow ourselves to be controlled, manipulated, deceived, or mistreated is our business.
In recovery, we learn an appropriate sense of ownership. If something isn't ours, we don't take it. If we take it, we learn to give it back. Let other people have their property, and learn to own and take good care of what's ours.
Today, I will work at developing a clear sense of what belongs to me, and what doesn't. If its not mine, I wont keep it. I will deal with my issues, my responsibilities, and myself. I will take my hands off what is not mine.
Today I will wait in quiet and faith for a clear answer before making any decisions. Today I feel secure, trusting that my instincts are guiding me on every step on my path. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Forgive Yourself
Doesn’t it feel good to forgive yourself? You don’t have to be afraid or reluctant to do that anymore. Forgiving yourself doesn’t mean you’re condemned. It means you’re setting yourself free.
We can gather so much guilt as we go through life. We may blame ourselves for the experiences we’ve had and how we’ve handled them. We may build up resentments against ourselves. We may even resist forgiving ourselves because we think that means saying we were bad and wrong. But not forgiving ourselves when we need to often leads us to return to situations that are unhealthy for us.
Forgiving yourself means you can leave places that feel bad, you can end relationships that no longer work, you can avoid situations that cause you continual pain and grief. Forgiving yourself means you can stop punishing yourself for what you’ve done and what you think you’ve done worng.
You don’t have to hold your mistakes against yourself any longer. You don’t have to deprive yourself of comfort, joy, love, and acceptance. It’s much easier to say, I made a mistake. This isn’t right for me. I don’t like this. This is wrong. Then forgive yourself.
Forgive yourself if you’ve done something wrong. Forgive yourself even if you haven’t done something wrong. Then see how good forgiveness feels. Forgive yourself and be free.
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More language of letting go
Respect your own timelines
“Do you have your “A” license yet?”
I was getting sick pf that question. Everyone I knew in skydiving was pushing through the course, meeting all their requirements, and hurrying to get their license. I knew from the beginning that it wouldn’t do me any good to push. This was a sport I needed to get right, and getting it right meant that I needed to learn at my own pace.
“It’s the journey, not the destination,” I kept telling myself as I watched my fellow sky divers progress, leaving me behind. “Everything happens in its own time.”
Finally, I came up with my response. It was November. I proudly announced, whenever asked about getting my license, that I didn’t plan on having it until June. I said it over, and over, and over. People left me alone. And I actually began to progress rapidly, after giving myself that much time.
In February, a series of events escalated my learning curve. I did my solo jumps, learned to pack my own parachute, and passed my written test. I had now met all the requirements for my “A” license. All that had to be done was submit the information and I’d have my license in hand.
After sending my material off, I waited an appropriate amount of time, then began checking the mail. Week after week, the license didn’t arrive. I waited patiently and continued checking. Toward the end of May, I went into the offices at the skydiving school. I told them I was concerned because my license hadn’t arrived yet.
They checked the records. “There was some confusion with the paperwork,” they said. “But it’s all been straightened out. You’ll have your license soon.”
When did that license arrive? In June, it came in the mail exactly when I said it would.
Some timing in life is out of our hands. Some isn’t. Just as you have power to say what, there’s a lot of power in saying when.
God, help synchronize my timing with yours. Show me if I’m pushing myself unduly or holding myself back.
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Fast-Forward Button
Moving in Real Time by Madisyn Taylor
We all want to push the fast-forward button, but in these times is where we find the juice stuff.
We all go through times when we wish we could press a fast-forward button and propel ourselves into the future and out of our current circumstances. Whether the situation we are facing is minor, or major such as the loss of a loved one, it is human nature to want to move away from pain and find comfort as soon as possible. Yet we all know deep down that we need to work through these experiences in a conscious fashion rather than bury our heads in the sand, because these are the times when we access important information about ourselves and life. The learning process may not be easy, but it is full of lessons that bring us wisdom we cannot find any other way.
The desire to press fast-forward can lead to escapism and denial, both of which only prolong our difficulties and in some cases make them worse. The more direct, clear, and courageous we are in the face of whatever we are dealing with, the more quickly we will move through the situation. Understanding this, we may begin to realize that trying to find the fast-forward button is really more akin to pressing pause. When we truly grasp that the only way out of any situation in which we find ourselves is to go through it, we stop looking for ways to escape and we start paying close attention to what is happening. We realize that we are exactly where we need to be. We remember that we are in this situation in order to learn something we need to know, and we can alleviate some of our pain with the awareness that there is a purpose to our suffering.
When you feel the urge to press the fast-forward button, remember that you are not alone; we all instinctively avoid pain. But in doing so, we often prolong our pain and delay important learning. As you choose to move forward in real time, know that in the long run, this is the least painful way to go. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When a person opens his eyes each morning and rises through sweaty nausea to face frightening reality with bones rattling and nerves screaming; when a person stumbles through the day in a pit of despair, wishing to die, but refusing to die; when a person gets up the next day and does it all over again — well, that takes guts. That takes a kind of real, basic survival courage, a courage that can be put to good use if that person even finds his or her way to The Program. That person has learned courage the hard way, and when that person comes to The Program, he or she will find new and beautiful ways to use it. Have I the courage to keep trying, one day at a time.
Today I Pray
May I put the “gut-to-survive” kind of courage left over from my drinking days into good use in The Program. If I was able to “hang on” enough to live through the miseries of my addiction, may I translate that same will to survive into my recovery program. May I use my courage in new, constructive ways.
Today I Will Remember
God preserve me to help carry out His purpose.
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One More Day
Patience and fortitude conquer all things.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Remember how, ass children, we waited for special occasions like birthdays and holidays? The waiting seemed endless. Adults would admonish us, “Have patience. Everything comes to those who wait.”
We were always more than surprised when they seemed to pass more quickly by staying busy, just a our parents had said it would. As adults, we hear that in many instances the only way to conquer a problem is to wait it out. We can do nothing else, for no matter how important the awaited event or the news is, we can no more shorten the time than we could wish a speedy arrival of our birthdays when we were young. Now as then, our only options are to have patience and to stay busy.
Now that I am not as well as before I am learning the true value of patience.
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Food For Thought
No Doormats Here
When we work the Twelve Steps, we grow in self-respect. Abstaining from compulsive overeating gives us new self-confidence. We no longer need to feel either inferior or superior, but we can take our proper place as an equal to those around us.
Many of us used to let ourselves be manipulated because of a lack of self-respect. We may also have tried to manipulate others. Once we have taken an inventory and gotten rid of past guilt's and defects, we embark on a new way of living. Just as we do not try to control the behavior of those we live with, we also do not permit them to control ours.
We are responsible to our Higher Power and responsible for our own actions. We look for opportunities to serve and to give freely of what we have been given. We respect the new life that God has chosen to give us, and we intend to use it as He directs. Saying no to requests and demands, which interfere with and jeopardize our program is sometimes necessary for our recovery.
Thank You, Lord, for self-respect.
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One Day At A Time
SERENITY
“The final wisdom of life requires not the annulment of incongruity
but the achievement of serenity with and above it.”
Reinhold Niebuhr
When I started coming to Recovery Group meetings, I heard the word "serenity" used frequently. I waited for someone to turn the serenity light switch on for me. I thought if I kept coming, the guy in charge of lights would turn mine on, and then I would possess and understand serenity! But the people in the meetings kept telling me, "You need to work the steps." I began to work them with a vengeance, the way a compulsive person -- such as I am -- tends to function.
With each passing day I have begun to feel more comfortable living in my own skin. My fears, worries about the future, and anxieties have all decreased. I have made a more personal connection with my Higher Power. I have begun to develop friendships with other people in Recovery Group. The loving friendships here have had a huge impact on how I feel about myself. They have caused me to experience more self-love and self-acceptance. I have come to the point where I now know that no matter what happens, things will eventually work out for the best for me.
One day at a time...
I will continue to attend meetings to experience serenity.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Instead of regarding ourselves as intelligent agents, spearheads of God's ever advancing Creation, we agnostics and atheists chose to believe that our human intelligence was the last word, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and end of all. Rather vain of us, wasn't it.? - Pg. 49 - We Agnostics
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Heavy were the storms and fierce the tides that brought us to this point in recovery. Storms also lie ahead, but after each storm, follows the dawn of calm. The old washes away and the time is right for a clean life.
May I surrender to the Light, God as I understand You, and learn to protect myself during storms.
Inside My Mind
I am changing, I can feel it. I am learning and growing just by being still. I am sensing more than I normally sense and feeling more than I normally feel. I am grateful to feel alive and to recognize that life is a spiritual journey. All my life circumstances are spiritual challenges, opportunities to see new sides of myself, new sides of life. Life surrounds me; it is inside, outside and everywhere. If I am open and still inside, life is there. If I am not lost in a million unnecessary distractions, life is there, spirit is there-waiting to be seen and felt.
I allow my mind its freedom.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The most convincing message we can carry to other chemical dependents is our own example of a contented recovery. And kindness. To the desolate alcoholic/addict, an act of kindness can be the difference between getting 'better' or getting 'bitter.'
I remember that I may be the only Big Book some people ever see.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
You are the problem, but you are also the solution.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will wait in quiet and faith for a clear answer before making any decisions. Today I feel secure, trusting that my instincts are guiding me on every step on my path.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I put my head in the oven and turned on the gas. But nothing happened... They'd turned the gas off, I hadn't paid the bill. - Anon.
bluidkiti
05-05-2021, 10:15 AM
May 14
Daily Reflections
IT'S OKAY TO BE ME
Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain
facts about their lives. . . . they have turned to easier methods. . . .
But they had not learned enough humility. . . .
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 72-73
Humility sounds so much like humiliation, but it really is the ability to
look at myself -- and honestly accept what I find. I no longer need to
be the "smartest" or "dumbest" or any other "est." Finally, it is okay
to be me. It is easier for me to accept myself if I share my whole life.
If I cannot share in meetings, then I had better have a sponsor --
someone with whom I can share those "certain facts" that could lead
me back to a drunk, to death. I need to take all the Steps. I need the
Fifth Step to learn true humility. Easier methods do not work.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Having gotten over drinking, we have only just begun to
enjoy the benefits of A.A. We find new friends, so that
we are no longer lonely. We find new relationships with
our families, so that we are happy at home. We find
release from our troubles and worries through a new
way of looking at things. We find an outlet for our
energies in helping other people. Am I enjoying these
benefits of A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
The kingdom of heaven is within you. God sees, as no one
can see, what is within you. He sees you growing more and
more like Himself. That is our reason for existence, to grow
more and more like God, to develop more and more the spirit
of God within you. You can often see in others those
qualities and aspirations that you yourself possess. So also
can God recognize His own spirit in you. Your motives and
aspirations can only be understood by those who have
attained the same spiritual level as you have.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may not expect complete understanding from
others. I pray that I may only expect this from God, as I try
to grow more like Him.
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As Bill Sees It
The Individual's Rights, p. 134
We believe that there isn't a fellowship on earth which devotes more
care to its individual members; surely there is none which more
jealously guards the individual's right to think, talk, and act as he
wishes. No A.A. can compel another to do anything; nobody can be
punished or expelled.
Our Twelve Steps to recovery are suggestions; the Twelve
Traditions which guarantee A.A.'s unity contain not a single
"Don't." They repeatedly say, "We ought . . ." but never "You
must!"
<< << << >> >> >>
"Though it is traditional that our Fellowship may not coerce anyone,
let us not suppose even for an instant that we are not under
constraint. Indeed, we are under enormous coercion--the kind that
comes in bottle. Our former tyrant, King Alcohol, always stands
ready again to clutch us to him.
"Therefore, freedom from alcohol is the great 'must' that has to be
achieved, else we go mad or die."
1. 12 & 12, p. 129
2. Letter, 1966
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Walk in Dry Places
Making Laws For Ourselves
Attaining Freedom
Being human means that we're subject to all the laws and limitations that apply to human beings. We should not, however, put more limitations on ourselves than might be required by our situation.
Recovering People should be able to do anything within their capabilities. It's usually a mistake to think that our problem means forfeiture of opportunities. One person, for example, often told his friends that he could not return to his former profession in sales because "nobody want to hire an alcoholic salesman."
But it is not written anywhere that firms will not gladly welcome a capable sales associate who is recovering. Many alcoholics do return to their former employment upon recovery. Our friend was simply making a law for himself by believing he was blocked from this field.
Let's always remember that recovery is freedom, not bondage. And let's see ourselves doing anything that's reasonable and proper for others.
Having rejoined the human race, I'll enthusiastically accept all the advantages and opportunities others have.
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Keep It Simple
Make yourself an honest [person], and then you may be sure that there is one rascal less in the world. ---Thomas Carlyle
Honesty does not mean saying all we think or feel. Many of our thoughts and feelings are only with us for a minute. They are not always the truth. For example, saying to someone you love, "I hate you!" in the middle of an argument can destroy things.
Honesty means living by what is true to us. Then we choose when and how to say things to others.
Think of honesty as the air we breathe; it's what keeps us alive, but it can get polluted and kill. It must be treated with respect and care.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me know the power of honesty. Help me speak it with care and respect.
Action for the Day: Before I speak today I'll ask myself: "Is this true? Am I speaking because this needs to be said?"
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Each Day a New Beginning
Miracles are instantaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves, usually at unlikely moments and to those who least expect them. --Katherine Anne Porter
Each of us has miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. We no doubt felt hopeless many times. We no doubt pleaded, aimlessly and to no one in particular, for help. And then it came. Many of us probably do not know just how. But we can look around at one another and appreciate the miracle in our lives.
We still have days when the going is rough. Days when we feel twelve years old, unable to handle the responsibility of our lives, in need of a mother to nurture us and assure us that the pain will pass. We can look to a sponsor on those days. We can look for someone else to help. We can also reflect on how far we've come. Gratitude, in the midst of distress, for all the gifts of recovery eases the pain, the fear, the stress of the moment.
The miracles continue in my life. Every day offers me a miracle. Thankfulness today will help me see the miracles at work in my life and in the lives of other women on the road to recovery.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
But for every man who drinks others are involved—the wife who trembles in fear of the next debauch; the mother and father who see their son wasting away.
p. 104
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
At twenty-five I had developed an alcoholic problem. I began making the rounds of the doctors in the hope that one of them might find some cure for my accumulating ailments, preferably something that could be removed surgically.
p. 269
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
When A.A. was still young, lots of eager groups were forming. In a town we'll call Middleton, a real crackerjack had started up. The townspeople were as hot as firecrackers about it. Stargazing, the elders dreamed of innovations. They figured the town needed a great big alcoholic center, a kind of pilot plant A.A. groups could duplicate everywhere. Beginning on the ground floor there would be a club; in the second story they would sober up drunks and hand them currency for the back debts; the third deck would house an educational project - quite noncontroversial, of course. In imagination the gleaming center was to go up several stories more, but three would do for a start. This would all take a lot of money - other people's money. Believe it or not, wealthy townsfolk bought the idea.
p. 147
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Birds sing after a storm, why shouldn't we?
--Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy (1890 - 1995)
"Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first
or last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with glory."
--Betty Smith
"AA may or may not get me to heaven, but it surely got me out of
he!!."
--unknown
There is more to life than increasing its speed.
--Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (1869-1948)
When our faith is weak, God is still strong and present with us.
--Elaine S. Massey
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SEX
"A little theory makes sex more
interesting, more comprehensive
and less scary. Too much is a
put-down especially as you're
likely to get it out of perspective
and become a spectator of your
own performance."
--Dr. Alex Comfort
We make too much of sex because we are afraid of it. We abuse God's
gift of sex by placing it out of context, removing it from the other
things that make it meaningful, e.g., gentleness, trust, sensitivity,
communication and commitment.
The performance becomes more important than the expression. The
meaning gets lost in the event. God's precious gift of sex is abused by
the sex act itself and it then begins to feed on itself. Compulsive sex is
only demonstrated loneliness!
Spirituality teaches me to see all things as part of God's gift of
"wholeness" and sex is an important part of this - but only a part.
God, in the awareness of my sexuality, may I discover a relationship
with myself, others and You.
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"He is the Rock, His work is perfect; for all His ways are justice, a
God of truth and without injustice; righteous and upright is He."
Deuteronomy 32:4
For you, O God, tested us; you refined us like silver. You brought us
into prison and laid burdens on our backs. You let men ride over
our heads; we went through fire and water, but you brought us to a
place of abundance.
Psalm 66:10-12
The LORD says, "Do not fear, for I am with you . . . I will strengthen you, I will help you."
Isaiah 41:10
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Daily Inspiration
Fill your time with that which is important to you and you will feel accomplished. Lord, help me to know my priorities and to be focused enough to avoid distraction.
When we have to justify our actions, it may be that our actions are not just. Lord, Your will is goodness. May I always have the strength and courage to choose Your way so that I can simplify my life and enjoy the peace of Your presence.
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NA Just For Today
Oops!
"Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results."
Basic Text, p. 23
Mistakes! We all know how it feels to make them. Many of us feel that our entire lives have been a mistake. We often regard our mistakes with shame or guilt—at the very least, with frustration and impatience. We tend to see mistakes as evidence that we are still sick, crazy, stupid, or too damaged to recover.
In truth, mistakes are a very vital and important part of being human. For particularly stubborn people (such as addicts), mistakes are often our best teachers. There is no shame in making mistakes. In fact, making new mistakes often shows our willingness to take risks and grow.
It's helpful, though, if we learn from our mistakes; repeating the same ones may be a sign that we're stuck. And expecting different results from the same old mistakes—well, that's what we call "insanity!" It just doesn't work.
Just for today: Mistakes aren't tragedies. But please, Higher Power, help me learn from them!
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. --Henry Ward Beecher
Once there was a boy who always looked on the bright side and always expected the best. He expected to like brussels sprouts before he had ever tasted them, for instance, and to like his teacher on the first day of school. Because he had such a sunny outlook on things, he was rarely disappointed.
But the boy's father thought he wasn't realistic, so one Christmas he decided to test him. On Christmas morning there were many presents, all but one small one were for the boy's brother. The brother opened his gifts with glee--a train set, a toy robot, a cowboy outfit, even his own TV.
Through all this, the boy smiled expectantly, confident the contents of his small box would equal the splendor of his brother's gifts. When it was his turn he ripped the box open to find only a pile of hay and some very smelly animal droppings.
To his father's astonishment, the boy clapped his hands with joy and ran immediately to the backyard. "Yippee!" he cried. "There must be a pony here somewhere!"
If I expect the best, just for today, what wondrous things might happen?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Often the wisdom of the body clarifies the despair of the spirit. --Marion Woodman
The unity of body and spirit becomes more real for us as we learn to listen to the messages our bodies give. Perhaps if we are frequently ill with a cold we are hiding from the fact that we are discouraged and in need of something for our spirit. We all face the problems at times of sleeplessness or backaches or allergies. These are not moral problems but problems that go with being human. When we are open to the spirit dimension, we look for the part that may express a message from our spiritual selves.
As we notice our physical selves today, we perhaps feel a tension in a muscle or a sensation somewhere that can speak to us about our deeper feelings. The message may not be clear at first. Spiritual messages are not quick answers, but if we listen to our questions a while, the answers may gradually become clear. Simply being open to the messages strengthens us for our tasks and deepens our spiritual self-awareness.
Today, I am learning to listen to the wisdom of my own body.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Miracles are instantaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves, usually at unlikely moments and to those who least expect them. --Katherine Anne Porter
Each of us has miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. We no doubt felt hopeless many times. We no doubt pleaded, aimlessly and to no one in particular, for help. And then it came. Many of us probably do not know just how. But we can look around at one another and appreciate the miracle in our lives.
We still have days when the going is rough. Days when we feel twelve years old, unable to handle the responsibility of our lives, in need of a mother to nurture us and assure us that the pain will pass. We can look to a sponsor on those days. We can look for someone else to help. We can also reflect on how far we've come. Gratitude, in the midst of distress, for all the gifts of recovery eases the pain, the fear, the stress of the moment.
The miracles continue in my life. Every day offers me a miracle. Thankfulness today will help me see the miracles at work in my life and in the lives of other women on the road to recovery.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Honesty
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. --Step Five of Al-Anon
Talking openly and honestly to another person about ourselves, in an attitude that reflects self responsibility, is critical to recovery.
Its important to admit what we have done wrong to others and to ourselves. Verbalize our beliefs and our behaviors. Get our resentments and fears out in the open.
That's how we release our pain. That's how we release old beliefs and feelings. That's how we are set free. The more clear and specific we can be with our Higher Power, ourselves, and another person, the more quickly we will experience that freedom.
Step Five is an important part of the recovery process. For those of us who have learned to keep secrets from others, and ourselves it is not just a step - it is a leap toward becoming healthy.
Today I will remember that its okay to talk about the issues that bother me. It is by sharing my issues that I will grow beyond them. I will also remember that its okay to be selective about those in whom I confide. I can trust my instincts and choose someone who will not use my disclosures against me, and who will give me healthy feedback.
I have all the power I need today to say no to negative choices. The personal choices I make today are positive and healthy. I take responsibility for my life today. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Stay Open to Surprise
On my journey, I have often been surprised. Sometimes, pleasantly surprised.
Some of the places I was told to visit, places I was told would bring me joy,didn’t. Occasionally, they left me cold and confused. I would reach out to grasp something from an experience, only to find it wasn’t there, at least not for me. I was left wondering why it didn’t work, why it didn’t feel right for me, or why it didn’t do for me what others said it did for them.
Then other places, other experiences– the ones I had the least expectations of– surprised me. They riveted my soul, opened my heart, touched me, changed me in ways I didn’t expect. In a way that still surprise me.
To have certain expectations is natural. But stay open to surprise. Don’t let your dreams and expectations color what you know to be true for you. Trust your perceptions. Trust how a thing feels to you. If you expected something to work and it didn’t, trust that. If something has opened your heart and produced growth, love, and joy, trust that.
Don’t let your expectations or prejudices color and distort your experience. You may be pleasantly surprised to find joy where you least expected it.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time for a change
Eventually, enough is enough. We have held on to our broken dream until it has become a weight on our back, held on to our broken relationships until we cannot find the strength to give it another go, and clung to expectations, fears, worries, and chains until we can’t stand the strain any longer.
We’re at a crossroads. One path leads further into familiar territory. The other path leads to a breakthrough. What lies on the other side, we can’t see.
It’s the void, the unknown, the unknowable.
This isn’t death. It’s a rebirth, am awakening as profound as that moment when sobriety first takes hold of the lifelong drunk. Or when the confused codependent takes those first steps of self-care.
Are you willing to risk it? Have you reached the point, yet where enough is enough? Or will you take the other, more familiar path back to continue rehashing what you’ve already been through? Sometimes it’s easier to stay with our limitations and with what doesn’t work. At least then we know what to expect.
Take a chance. Try something new. Go ahead. Step on that new path, even though you’re not certain where it will lead. See! Right around the bend is a glowing light. The new path may not be any easier to walk than the old path, but this new road will lead to joy.
For now it’s enough to be willing to change.
To do that, step into the void.
God, help me see the things that I need to let go of to continue my growth. Help me walk away from what’s comfortable and known into the unknown and what I can’t see or predict.
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An Empowered Perspective
Importance of Forgiveness by Madisyn Taylor
Learning to forgive is the greatest gift you can give to yourself.
When someone has hurt us, consciously or unconsciously, one of the most difficult things we have to face in resolving the situation is the act of forgiveness. Sometimes it feels like it’s easier not to forgive and that the answer is to simply cut the person in question out of our lives. In some cases, ending the relationship may be the right thing to do, but even in that case, we will only be free if we have truly forgiven. If we harbor bitterness in our hearts against anyone, we only hurt ourselves because we are the ones harboring the bitterness. Choosing to forgive is choosing to alleviate ourselves of that burden, choosing to be free of the past, and choosing not to perceive ourselves as victims.
One of the reasons that forgiveness can be so challenging is that we feel we are condoning the actions of the person who caused our suffering, but this is a misunderstanding of what is required. In order to forgive, we simply need to get to a place where we are ready to stop identifying ourselves with the suffering that was caused us. Forgiveness is something we do for ourselves, and our forgiveness of others is an extension of our readiness to let go of our own pain. Getting to this point begins with fully accepting what has happened. Through this acceptance, we allow ourselves to feel and process our emotions.
It can be helpful to articulate our feelings in writing over a period of days or even weeks. As we allow ourselves to say what we need to say and ask for what we need to heal, we will find that this changes each day. It may be confusing, but it is a sign of progress. At times we may feel as if we are slogging uphill through dense mud and thick trees, getting nowhere. If we keep going, however, we will reach a summit and see clearly that we are finally free of the past. From here, we recognize that suffering comes from suffering, and compassion for those who have hurt us naturally arises, enhancing our new perspective. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“A very popular error — having the courage of one’s convictions; rather it is a matter of having the courage for an attack upon one’s convictions,” wrote Nietzsche. The Program is helping me to get rid of myh old ideas by sharing with others and working the Twelve Steps. Having made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself; having admitted too God, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs; and having become entirely ready to have God remove all my defects of character — I will humbly ask Him to remove my shortcomings. Am I trying to follow The Program just as it is?
Today I Pray
I pray that I may continue to practice the Twelve Steps, over and over again, if need be. The Program has worked for hundreds and hundreds of recovering chemically dependent people the world over. It can work for me. May I pause regularly and check to see if I am really practicing The Program, as it is set forth.
Today I Will Remember
Step By Step. Day By Day.
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One More Day
A true friend is the most precious of all possessions and the one we take the least thought about acquiring.
– La Rouchefocauld
Even with honorable intentions we may, once in a while, threat those who care about us with less respect than they deserve. When a chronic illness has entered our life we can become obsessed with ourselves. It is difficult to be anything but self-centered at first because we are frightened and uncertain about the future.
It is then that we may alienate our closest friends with a boring daily litany of symptoms. Gradually we learn that illness is only one part of our lives and that dwelling on it serves no purpose and may damage our friendships. When our obsession with illness subsides, we become able once again to express concern and interest in others — the foundation of friendship.
My friendships are invaluable. I will let my friends know how much I cherish them.
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Food For Thought
Abstinence Plus
Most of us find it impossible to maintain our abstinence and our weight loss if we do not continue to grow spiritually and emotionally. The Steps are not something we take once and for all and then put aside. We continue to work on ourselves.
It is possible to reach and maintain a weight goal, but the emotional and spiritual goals of the program are never fully attained. We keep striving for progress, in spite of temporary setbacks.
All of us need something to live for, something that captures our imagination and beckons us on to greater efforts. Achievement in the areas of study and work, commitments to family and community, development of talents and interests--all serve as motivation. Usually, though, we require something more to keep us going. When we become aware of the Spirit, which is constantly available to us through contact with our Higher Power, we are tuned in to the source of our abstinence and of our life.
May I remember to live by the Spirit.
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One Day At A Time
FEARLESS
“As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind,
as we discovered we could face life successfully,
as we became conscious of His presence,
we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.”
The Big Book
I refuse to be frightened to the point of missing the opportunities my Higher Power has provided for me. I will no longer hurt myself by avoiding being hurt. When I avoid risks because I'm afraid the outcome will be painful, I am stuck – not safe.
By working my program I have discovered that many times when I'm engulfed in fear, I am not trusting my Higher Power. The more I practice the Serenity Prayer, the more serene I become. From my new perspective I can see numerous occasions in which my Higher Power did things for me which I could not do by myself. Possibly a doomed relationship I couldn't end, and my Higher Power ended for me by having the other person walk away. Maybe a financial crisis that was suddenly alleviated from an unexpected source. How about the ability to detach from a loved one's issues without feeling responsible for "fixing" everything or taking their struggles personally. In order to surrender my control over these things, I choose to be fearless in trusting my Higher Power.
Today I will be grateful even for the painful times because sometimes they are the lesser of two hurts: the easiest being when God steps in to protect me, and the hardest being when my will prevents me from letting go of something that isn't good for me.
One day at a time...
I will trust my Higher Power and know that where I am today is right where I need to be. I don't have to have all the answers.
~ Sandee S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
See your man alone, if possible. At first engage in general conversation. After a while, turn the talk to some phase of drinking. Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. You will thus get a better idea of how you ought to proceed. If he is not communicative, give him a sketch of your drinking career up to the time you quit. But say nothing, for the moment, of how that was accomplished. If he is in a serious mood dwell on the troubles liquor has caused you, being careful not to moralize or lecture. If his mood is light, tell him humorous stories of your escapades. Get him to tell some of his.
When he sees you know all about the drinking game, commence to describe yourself as an alcoholic. - Pg. 91 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We may be hearing a lot about acceptance right now, if not, we soon will. Acceptance does not mean we have to 'put up with all this ****.' Acceptance means facing of reality. 'This is how it is and I will do the best I can.'
Help me take an objective view of my current situation and not be resigned to some 'fate.' I will be an active part of this process of recovery.
Prayer
Prayer helps me to heal. Study after study scientifically prove that prayer is beneficial to my health. I will pray for my healing throughout my day when ever it occurs to me. I will accept and be grateful or the prayers of others knowing that they are being carried to me by unseen hands. Just as radio waves pulse through the air and become voices, prayers come to me in an inner voice. I will ask my body to hear the prayers that are coming toward me and to invite them into each and every cell.
I accept the power of prayer to heal
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
If you don't deal with your feelings, they'll deal with you. Whatever you are thinking right now is creating how you feel. One of the best ways to deal with the way you feel is to create positive thoughts.
I create positive feelings by thinking positive thoughts.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If your Higher Power can handle eternity, you can surely handle right now!
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I have all the power I need today to say no to negative choices. The personal choices I make today are positive and healthy. I take responsibility for my life today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
One foot in yesterday, one foot in tomorrow, peeing all over today. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
05-05-2021, 10:45 AM
May 15
Daily Reflections
KNOW GOD; KNOW PEACE
It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads
only to futility and unhappiness. . . . But with the alcoholic,
whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual
experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 66
Know God;
Know peace.
No God;
No peace.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In A.A. we find a new strength and peace from the realization
that there must be a Power greater than ourselves that is
running the universe and that is on our side when we live a
good life. So the A.A. program really never ends. You begin by
overcoming drink and you go on from there to many new
opportunities for happiness and usefulness. Am I really
enjoying the full benefits of A.A.?
Meditation For The Day
"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all
these things shall be added unto you." We should not seek
material things first, but seek spiritual things first and
material things will come to us, as we honestly work for them.
Many people seek material things first and think they can then
grow into knowledge of spiritual things. You cannot serve God
and Mammon at the same time. The first requisites of an abundant
life are the spiritual things: honesty, purity, unselfishness, and
love. Until you have these qualities, quantities of material things
are of little real use to you.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may put much effort into acquiring spiritual things.
I pray that I may not expect good things until I am right
spiritually.
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As Bill Sees It
Victory in Defeat, p. 135
Convinced I never could belong, and vowing I'd never settle for any
second-rate status, I felt I simply had to dominate in everything I
chose to do: work or play. As this attractive formula for the good
life began to succeed, according to my then specifications of success,
I became deliriously happy.
But when an undertaking occasionally did fail, I was filled with
resentment and depression that could be cured only by the next
triumph. Very early, therefore, I came to value everything in terms
of victory or defeat--"all or nothing." The only satisfaction I knew
was to win.
<< << << >> >> >>
Only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward
liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness
finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful
lives may be built.
1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. 12 & 12, p. 21
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Walk in Dry Places
Trusting others
Personal Relationships
Some people trust others too much, while a few seem to have no trust at all. Either stance is wrong and leads to some kind of trouble.
As we grow in our Twelve Step program, we learn the truth about trust. We can trust others if our expectations aren't too high. We have to remember, however, that as human beings they can fail us. However, it's also unrealistic to be suspicious of everyone. The truth is that most people aren't out to get us or to hurt us. They are pursuing their own interests, just as we must do.
As we grow emotionally, we come to see that we have less difficulty trusting others. We no longer make outrageous demands on them or stretch their patience to the limits. We also realize that there are many times when we can work co-operatively with everybody's interest in mind.
I'll think realistically about others today, being careful not to expect either too much or too little from the. I'll certainly not expect more from them than I could reasonably expect from myself.
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Keep It Simple
That day is lost on which one has not laughed.---French proverb
For a long time, we didn't really laugh. It's surprising when we think about it: we hadn't really laughed for so long. . .we almost forgot how good we could feel. It feels so good to laugh again!
Now, our spirits come more alive each day. Now, we feel what alcohol and other drugs stuffed deep inside us. Pain, fear, and anger come up. But so do happiness and joy, thankfulness and a sense of humor. In early recovery, we work through the hard feelings. As we grow in the program, we have more and more room for happiness.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, wake me up to the joy and laughter that today hold for me. Don't let me miss it!
Action for the Day: Today, I'll spread some laughter. I will learn a joke and tell it to three people.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Difficulties, opposition, criticism--these things are meant to be overcome, and there is a special joy in facing them and in coming out on top. It is only when there is nothing but praise that life loses its charm, and I begin to wonder what I should do about it. --Vijaya Lakshmi Pandit
To be alive means to experience difficulties, conflicts, challenges from many directions. What we do with adverse conditions both determines and is determined by who we are. Resistance, most of us have learned, heightens the adversity. Acceptance of the condition, trusting all the while the lesson it offers us is for our benefit, ensures that we'll "come out on top."
Difficulties are opportunities for advancement, for increased self-awareness, for self-fulfillment. So often we hear and remind one another, that we grow through pain. We can face any situation knowing we have the strength of the program to shore us up. Strangely, we need challenges in order to grow; without growth we wither. Happiness is the bounty for facing the momentarily unhappy conditions.
Any difficulty I meet today offers me a chance for even greater happiness; it guarantees my growth.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Among us are wives, relatives and friends whose problem has been solved, as well as some who have not yet found a happy solution. We want the wives of Alcoholics Anonymous to address the wives of men who drink too much. What they say will apply to nearly everyone bound by ties of blood or affection to an alcoholic.
p. 104
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
Of course the doctors found nothing. Just an unstable woman, undisciplined, poorly adjusted, and filled with nameless fears. Most of them prescribed sedatives and advised rest and moderation
p. 269
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
There were, though, a few conservative dissenters among the alcoholics. the wrote the Foundation*, A.A.'s headquarters in New York, wanting to know about this sort of streamlining. They understood that the elders, just to nail things down good, were about to apply to the Foundation for a charter. These few were disturbed and skeptical.
*In 1954, The name of the Alcoholic Foundation, Inc. was changed to the General Service Board of Alcoholics Anonymous, Inc. and the Foundation office is now the General Service Office.
p. 148
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Look past the body, past the personality, past the behavior, into the
window of one another's souls. There we make a connection. The God
in me recognizes and honors the God in you.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"One of the biggest things I've learned is that I don't always have to
be right."
--Jeffrey B. Swartz
"One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all
of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical
rose garden over the horizon - instead of enjoying the roses that are
blooming outside our windows today."
--Dale Carnegie
"The future is always beginning now."
--Mark Strand
"The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a
time."
--Abraham Lincoln
Enjoy God's handiwork all around you.
--Susan D. Petropulos
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
TEACHING
"To teach is to learn."
--Japanese Proverb
The more I learn the more I know that I do not understand. Life is full
of new and wonderful information; paradoxes and confusion abound;
every new idea leads to a further truth - and the journey seems
endless.
In a sense we are all disciples; we are all learning from each other and
the role of teacher and student is forever being exchanged. In my
sobriety I am able to see how many wonderful "things" exist in the
world - so many fascinating and interesting places to visit, so many
loving and insightful people. God has given me so much, I am so
grateful to be able to learn in His garden.
Teacher, may I never stop learning and being a student in Your world.
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"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father
of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction,
so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction,
with the Comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God."
II Corinthians 1:3-4
I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me, and I
in him, he bears much fruit; for apart from me you can do nothing.
John 15:5
"The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them
from all their troubles."
Psalm 34:17
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Daily Inspiration
If you are waiting to be happy, you never will be. Lord, the only moment that I can count on and be in charge of is right now. Help me choose to be happy.
One of God's greatest gifts to us is eternal life. Lord, may I daily care for the needs of my soul, grow strong in my love for You, and be an extension of You during my time on earth.
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NA Just For Today
Fear Of the Fourth Step
"As we approach this step, most of us are afraid that there is a monster inside of us that, if released, will destroy us."
Basic Text, p. 27
Most of us are terrified to look at ourselves, to probe our insides. We're afraid that if we examine our actions and motives, we'll find a bottomless black pit of selfishness and hatred. But as we take the Fourth Step, we'll find that those fears were unwarranted. We're human, just like everyone else—no more, no less.
We all have personality traits that we're not especially proud of. On a bad day, we may think that our faults are worse than anyone else's. We'll have moments of self-doubt. We'll question our motives. We may even question our very existence. But if we could read the minds of our fellow members, we'd find the same struggles. We're no better or worse than anyone else.
We can only change what we acknowledge and understand. Rather than continuing to fear what's buried inside us, we can bring it out into the open. We'll no longer be frightened, and our recovery will flourish in the full light of self-awareness.
Just for today: I fear what I don't know. I will expose my fears and allow them to vanish.
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
What is moral is what you feel good after. --Ernest Hemingway
Each of us has a little voice inside us that tells us what is good and what is bad. For instance, if our friends are making fun of someone who is different than we are, how do we feel if we join in the laughter? Do we feel more comfortable if we refuse to join in, or if we tell them their jokes are not funny?
As we grow, we learn more and more to trust the inner voice. Sometimes, in times of dark confusion, we have to listen very hard, but it is there to guide us. It is a beacon showing us the way out of the darkness of uncertainty. It is our guide to goodness.
Will I have the courage to listen to my inner voice today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If you can't fight and you can't flee, flow. --Robert Eliot
Too often, we men have lived with a single answer to every situation: win. We saw our friendships in competitive terms, so we couldn't let our guard down. We looked at life as a challenge to be conquered rather than something to be enjoyed. Therefore, our first impulse was to fight and come out a winner. Many of us have played life like a game with only winners and losers, and we have neglected the deeper meaning in our experiences. Living that way, many of us have felt
like losers.
We all experience moments when a situation is much more powerful than we are. Those moments feel like defeat unless we allow them to open a whole new viewpoint on our lives. When we can flow with a situation, which will have its own way anyhow, we have become more mature men. We can breathe a sigh of relief because much of the tension in our lives is reduced when we stop trying to conquer every moment and instead simply flow with it.
Today, I will practice playing a new game of flowing and thereby deepen my awareness of life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Difficulties, opposition, criticism--these things are meant to be overcome, and there is a special joy in facing them and in coming out on top. It is only when there is nothing but praise that life loses its charm, and I begin to wonder what I should do about it. --Vijaya Lakshmi Pandit
To be alive means to experience difficulties, conflicts, challenges from many directions. What we do with adverse conditions both determines and is determined by who we are. Resistance, most of us have learned, heightens the adversity. Acceptance of the condition, trusting all the while the lesson it offers us is for our benefit, ensures that we'll "come out on top."
Difficulties are opportunities for advancement, for increased self-awareness, for self-fulfillment. So often we hear and remind one another, that we grow through pain. We can face any situation knowing we have the strength of the program to shore us up. Strangely, we need challenges in order to grow; without growth we wither. Happiness is the bounty for facing the momentarily unhappy conditions.
Any difficulty I meet today offers me a chance for even greater happiness; it guarantees my growth.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Taking Risks
Take a risk. Take a chance.
We do not have to indulge in obviously foolhardy or self-defeating risks, but we can allow ourselves to take positive risks in recovery. We cannot afford to keep ourselves paralyzed.
We do not have to keep ourselves stymied and trapped out of fear of making a mistake or failing. Naturally, we will make mistakes and fail from time to time. That's part of being fully alive. There are no guarantees. If we are waiting for guaranteed courses of action, we may spend much of our life waiting.
We do not have to shame ourselves or accept shame from anyone else, even those in recovery, for making mistakes. The goal of recovery is not to live life perfectly. The goal of recovery is to live, learn our lessons, and make overall progress.
Take a risk. Do not always wait for a guarantee. We don't have to listen to I told you so. Dust yourself off after a mistake, and then move on to the success.
God, help me begin to take healthy risks. Help me let go of my fear of failure, and help me let go of my fear of success. Help me let go of my fear of fully living my life, and help me start experiencing all parts of this journey.
It is exciting to know that the more I listen to the chattering that goes on in my mind,
the quicker I can identify the blocks to my positive and creative energy. Today I release all negativity so that I can be fully alive in the moment. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Lighten Up
The time for heaviness is past– heaviness of body, mind, spirit, and heart. That heaviness many of us felt was part of a time now gone. It’s time to lighten up.
“He was a different person,” she said. “Cheerful. Happy. Fun to be around. Things that used to bother him no longer did.” The woman was talking about her husband of only three years. She had dated him for a long time. Then after nearly dying of a heart attack, he was changed, transformed. They married and had the best three years of their lives before he died.
Those years were possible because he had learned to enjoy life, learned the value of love.
We don’t have to wait to open our hearts and enjoy life. We don’t have to wait to lighten up. We can do that now. We know that we can trust, that we can journey through each stage of our lives with open hearts, loving and living freely.
Let go of heaviness. Seek that which is light. Gravitate toward joy. Your soul and body will lead you, if only you will listen. Walk lightly. Speak and laugh lightly, as much as possible. Go lightly along your way.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time for plan B
I exited the plane, enjoyed my free fall, then checked my altimeter.
Pull time.
I deployed my parachute, waiting for that sweet whooshing sound, the one that meant I had a working canopy open. I didn’t hear the sound. I was leaning backwards and turning, instead of floating softly toward the ground. I didn’t have to do my eight-point canopy check. I knew immediately that something was wrong.
Ever since I had begun skydiving, I had been aware that although things mostly go well, sometimes they don’t. For a while, I dreaded the possibility that something wouldn’t be right with my canopy on opening, that I might have to cut it away. To deal with the fear and dread, I planned on having to use plan B– cutting away my main and pulling my reserve– each time I jumped out of the plane.
It was time to execute plan B.
Whoosh. What a sweet sound that was, as the reserve canopy opened over my head.
Most of us have plans and ideas about how we think an activity, or a relationship, or a job,will go. We marry, and we expect the relationship to flourish. We date someone, and we expect that person to be at least a decent sort of being. We begin a friendship with someone because something about that person has attracted us, drawn us in. We accept a job or work offer– or hire someone to work for us– and we have some idea how things will proceed. We hope things will work out well.
Life is like skydiving. There are no guarantees. And while we may do everything right and properly, sometimes things just don’t work out. While it isn’t healthy or advisable to run from every problem, sometimes we need to cut away major malfunctions.
It’s okay to have a plan. But take the time to develop a plan B,too. Know what you’re going to do if plan A doesn’t work out. Sometimes it’s easier to come up with an option or an emergency procedure if we think it through before the crisis occurs. Then we don’t have to panic. We can just institute the plan we rehearsed.
Have you reviewed your emergency procedures today?
God, give me the alertness to recognize when it’s time to cut away a malfunction. Give me the presence of mind to save my own life.
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It’s Never Too Late
Getting Back to What You Love by Madisyn Taylor
Forgetting about what you love to do can be a form of self-sabotage - get back to what you love.
There are times in life when we are committed to pursuing our passions. Every molecule in our body is focused on doing what we love. At other times, necessity and responsibility dictate that we put our dreams aside and do what needs to be done. It is during these moments that we may choose to forget what it is that we love to do. There are many other reasons for why we may leave our passions behind. A hobby may lose its appeal once we’ve realize it will never turn into our dream job. Someone important to us may keep telling us that our passions are childish and unsuitable – until we finally believe them.
Forgetting about what you love to do can be a form of self-sabotage. If you can forget about your dreams, then you never have to risk failure. But just because we’ve decided to ignore our passions doesn’t mean they no longer exist. Nothing can fill the emptiness that remains in a space vacated by a passion that we have tossed aside. Besides, life is too short to stop doing what you love, and it is never too late to rediscover your favorite things. If you gave up playing an instrument, painting, drawing, spending time in nature, or any other activity or interest that you once loved to do, now may be the time to take up that passion again. If you don’t remember what it is that you used to be passionate about, you may want to think about the activities or interests that you used to love or the dreams that you always wished you could pursue.
You don’t have to neglect your responsibilities to pursue your passions, and you don’t have to neglect your commitments to do what you love. When you make an effort to incorporate your interests into your life, the fire within you ignites. You feel excited, inspired, and fed by the flames that are sparked by living your life with passion for what you love. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Looking back at those last desperate days before I cam to The Program, I remember more than anything the feelings of loneliness an isolation. Even when I was surrounded by people, including my own family, the sense of “aloneness” was overwhelming. Even when I tried to act sociable and wore the mask of cheerfulness, I usually felt a terrible anger of not belonging. Will I ever forget the mystery of “being alone in a crowd?”
Today I Pray
I thank God for the greatest single joy that has come to me outside of my sobriety — the feeling that I am no longer alone. May I not assume that loneliness will vanish overnight. May I know that there will be a lonely time during recovery, especially since I must pull away from my former junkie friends or drinking buddies. I pray that I may find new friends who are recovering. I thank God for the fellowship of The Program.
Today I Will Remember
I am not alone.
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One More Day
Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment, and specially on their children, than the unloved lives of the parents.
– Carl Jung
Sometimes chronic illness emphasizes flaws in our relationships. For whatever reason — greater honesty, less tolerance, or an increased need for openness — we struggle more often with conflicting feelings toward our loved ones, especially our parents.
It can be healing for us to review our childhood years without blaming or embellishment. We can look back and realize that our parents, too, were influenced by their childhood years. Did they receive the nurturing they needed? The love they deserved? Thinking about our parents in this way reminds us to live with forgiveness for ourselves and for everyone whose lives we touch.
I will allow myself to look back on my parents which forgiveness.
************************************
Food For Thought
Just For Today
I do not have to plan the rest of my life this morning. All I have is today. I do not need to worry about what I will have for dinner tomorrow night. All I need to be concerned about today is today's food plan.
By accepting the fact that I cannot eat spontaneously - whatever and whenever I feel like it - I have freed myself to live more spontaneously. I make plans for the things that need to be done, but I find time left over to use as the Spirit moves. I will not decide today what I will do with the free time tomorrow. Tomorrow will bring new possibilities and promptings.
Just for today, I am living my program. I will not worry about how hard it will be to work it tomorrow. Tomorrow I will have new strength and fresh insight. Just for today, I will remember to stop and listen to the inner voice and follow where it leads. When I follow it, there is adventure in the day and joy in my heart.
Thank You for today.
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One Day At A Time
KIND WORDS
“Kind words can be short and easy to speak,
but their echoes are truly endless.”
Mother Teresa
How many times are we gifted with newcomers to our meetings? They are so easy to see as they huddle in the back of the room -- usually as close to the exit as possible. Their oversized coat is a good giveaway, especially in July. Their eyes show the fear and anxiety that we all felt. Sure, we made it, and so can they.
I remember the elder who first said those magical words to me -- those two simple words -- "Welcome Home." The warmth and safety those words held were immense. I felt that my body was huge, and I was embarrassed in a room full of people who looked very similar to me…but my eyes could not see that. They were filled with tears because of those two words. Welcome home. Whoever that person was, I have two words for you, "Thank you.”
What can you do to make a newcomer feel welcome to your meeting? Let us not forget that all-important first hug. I remember mine; do you remember yours? It felt good, I'll bet. So welcome the newcomer and let them know they are home.
One day at a time...
I will do my part to welcome the newcomer into our fellowship.
~ Danny
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We seldom allow an alcoholic to live in our homes for long at a time. It is not good for him, and it sometimes creates serious complications in a family. - Pg. 97 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The best decision you have ever made is to opt for the health that sobriety and clean time will give you. If the decision was someone else's then your decision to accept it was the best one ever made. You will gain a new perspective on life and for this you need to thank yourself.
As I thank myself, I also thank any others, including a Higher Power, as I understand Him / Her, for giving me another hour without mind-affecting chemicals.
Letting My Body Speak
I will let my body have a voice today and I will listen to what it's trying to say to me. If my body's voice has tears in it, I will allow those tears to come out. If my body is holding anger, I will allow myself to experience that anger so that it can dissolve and my cells no longer have to hold it for me. If my body wants to shiver and shake I will let it, knowing that it just needs to release something it doesn't want to hang onto any more.
I allow my body to let go of the emotions it is holding
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Knowing what to do with this moment, is as simple as doing the next right thing so that your Spiritual Source can act in your best interests.
When my Higher Power is for me, what can be against me?
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
When you talk, you can only say something you already know. When you listen, you may learn something somebody else knows.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
It is exciting to know that the more I listen to the chattering that goes on in my mind, the quicker I can identify the blocks to my positive and creative energy. Today I release all negativity so that I can be fully alive in the moment.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I was living on the streets, drinking. I'd sit in the meetings and listen to them talking about this 'phenomenon of craving', but I can't see that it applies to me. I mean, I would drink and get drunk but it didn't seem like a craving to me. I'd seen 'Lost Weekend' and 'Days Of Wine and Roses'. I don't claw the walls to get another drink. - But the funny thing about a craving is that you don't realize you have it until it's interrupted. - Bob D.
bluidkiti
05-08-2021, 11:16 AM
May 16
Daily Reflections
WE FORGIVE. . . .
Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors
or spiritual adviser that we first felt truly able to
forgive others, no matter how deeply we felt they had
wronged us. Our moral inventory had persuaded us that
all-round forgiveness was desirable, but it was only when
we resolutely tackled Step Five that we inwardly knew
we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 58
What a great feeling forgiveness is! What a revelation
about my emotional, psychological and spiritual nature.
All it takes is willingness to forgive; God will do the
rest.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In the story of the Good Samaritan, the wayfarer fell among
robbers and was left lying in the gutter, half dead. And a
priest and a Levite both passed by on the other side of the
road. But the Good Samaritan was moved with compassion and
came to him and bound up his wounds and brought him to an
inn and took care of him. Do I treat another alcoholic like
the priest and the Levite or like the Good Samaritan?
Meditation For The Day
Never weary in prayer. When one day you see how unexpectedly
your prayer has been answered, then you will deeply regret
that you have prayed so little. Prayer changes things for you.
Practice praying until your trust in God has become strong.
And then pray on, because it has become so much a habit that
you need it daily. Keep praying until prayer seems to become
communion with God. That is the note on which true times of
prayer should end.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may form the habit of daily prayer. I pray that
I may find the strength I need, as a result of this communion.
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As Bill Sees It
Giving Up Defects, p. 136
Looking at those defects we are unwilling to give up, we ought to
erase the hard and fast lines that we have drawn. Perhaps in some
cases we shall say, "This I cannot give up yet. . ." But we should not
say to ourselves, "This I will never give up!"
The moment we say, "No , never!" our minds close against the grace
of God. Such rebellion may be fatal. Instead, we should abandon
limited objectives and begin to move toward God's will for us.
12 & 12, pp. 68-69
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Walk in Dry Places
Trees Don't grow to the sky
Progress
Release from a compulsion can be a dramatic experience. It maqy also mean immediate relase from vexing problems caused by the compulsion. This time can bring such a sense of well-being that it's sometimes called the HONEYMOON or CLOUD NINE period.
In any growth process, however, we must remember that a law of diminishing returns sets in. This is expressed in the saying that trees don't grow to the sky. At some point, we will discover that our joyous feeling of pleasure has cooled down to an ordinary state of feeling well, that we are not becoming increasingly joyous by the day.
There's nothing wrong with such a mental plateau. If we're practicing the Twelve Step program, we're still moving forward, onward, and upward. Diminishing returns must still be counted as returns.
I'll accept today's progress with gratitude and humility. I won't expect more than a reasonable feeling of well-being and contentment, but that is considerable.
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Keep It Simple
The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.---Sydney J. Harris
Relaxing is one of the little joys of life. We can learn to take time from our busy day to chat with a friend, take a hot bath, or spend a few moments sitting alone under a tree. The busier we are, the more we need to take time to relax.
When we rest, we stop fussing about the outside world. We find out how we're doing inside. While relaxing, we can best listen to our Higher Power. Our minds calm down. We put busy thoughts aside. Sometimes, we can almost hear our Higher Power say, "Stay quiet and listen! I have something to tell you!"
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Each Day a New Beginning
It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world. --Dorothy Dix
The storms of our lives benefit us like the storms that hit our towns and homes and wash clean the air we breathe. Our storms bring to the surface the issues that plague us. Perhaps we still fear a job with responsibilities. Perhaps we still struggle with the significant other persons in our lives. Possessiveness is a particular storm that often haunts our progress. Storms force us to acknowledge these liabilities that continue to stand in our way, and acknowledgment is the step necessary to letting go.
Recovery is a whole series of storms, storms that help to sprout new growth, storms that flush clean our own clogged drains. The peace that comes after a storm is worth singing about.
Each storm can be likened to a rung on the ladder to wholeness, the ladder to full membership in the healthy human race. The storms make climbing tough, but we get strength with each step. The next storm will be more easily weathered.
If today is a stormy day, let me remember it will freshen the air I breathe.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
As wives of Alcoholics Anonymous, we would like you to feel that we understand as perhaps few can. We want to analyze mistakes we have made. We want to leave you with the feeling that no situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.
p. 104
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
Between the ages of twenty-five and thirty, I tried everything. I moved a thousand miles away from home to Chicago and a new environment. I studied art; I desperately endeavored to create an interest in many things, in a new place among new people. Nothing worked. My drinking habits increased in spite of my struggle for control. I tried the beer diet, the wine diet, timing, measuring, and spacing of drinks. I tried them mixed, unmixed, drinking only when happy, only when depressed. And still, by the time I was thirty years old, I was being pushed around by a compulsion to drink that was completely beyond my control. I couldn't stop drinking. I would hang on to sobriety for short intervals, but always there would come the tide of an overpowering necessity to drink, and, as I was engulfed in it, I felt such a sense of panic that I really believed I would die if I didn't get that drink inside.
pp. 269-270
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
Of course, there was a promoter in the deal - a super-promoter. By his eloquence he allayed all fears, despite advice from the Foundation that it could issue no charter, and that ventures which mixed an A.A. group with medication and education had come to sticky ends elsewhere. To make things safer, the promoter organized three corporations and became president of them all. Freshly painted, the new center shone. The warmth of it all spread through the town. Soon things began to hum. to insure foolproof, continuous operation, sixty-one rules and regulations were adopted.
p. 148
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Blowing out another's candle will not make yours shine brighter.
--unknown
God, give me the courage to follow my heart.
Teach me how to experience more joy in my life.
--Melody Beattie
"God never said it would be easy, only worth it."
--unknown
The most effective way to achieve right relations with any living thing
is to look for the best in it, and then help that best into the fullest
expression.
--Allen J. Boone
Secret of Life
Take time to Think. It is the source of Power.
Take time to Play. It is the secret of perpetual Youth.
Take time to be Friendly. It is the road to Happiness.
Take time to Work. It is the price of Success.
Take time to Pray. It is the greatest Power on Earth.
Take time to Love and be Loved. It is the way of God.
--Author Unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
LIBERTY
"Liberty means responsibility.
That is why most men dread it."
--George Bernard Shaw
The fellowship of recovering addicts and their families rejoice in the
freedom of life; the exchange of slavery to a drug or person for
liberty; a life of choice, rather than meaningless compulsion.
But with the gift of liberty comes the weight of responsibility. Today I
am responsible for my life. No longer can I say I do not know; no
longer can I blame others for my disease; no longer can I manipulate in
the "playground of denial".
The spiritual program requires a maturity of lifestyle that involves
responsibility - but the joys are immense.
O Master of liberty and responsibility, let me not forget to laugh.
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And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches
in glory by Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19
"I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.
Psalm 91:2
I sought the LORD, and He heard me, And delivered me from all my
fears. They looked to Him and were radiant, And their faces were not
ashamed. This poor man cried out, and the LORD heard him, And
saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the LORD encamps all
around those who fear Him, And delivers them.
Psalm 34:4-7
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Daily Inspiration
When your mind takes you to places you don't want to go, you have the power to bring yourself back. Lord, strengthen my ability to focus on that which I am experiencing now so that I will truly live and lose none of the time You have given to me.
Loneliness happens when you build walls instead of bridges. Lord, bless me with a welcoming spirit for those that might need me today.
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NA Just For Today
Our Higher Power's Will
"God's will for us becomes our own true will for ourselves."
Basic Text, p. 46
The Twelve Steps are a path to spiritual awakening. This awakening takes the form of a developing relationship with a loving Higher Power. Each succeeding step strengthens that relationship. As we continue to work the steps, the relationship grows, becoming ever more important in our lives.
In the course of working the steps, we make a personal decision to allow a loving Higher Power to direct us. That guidance is always available; we need only the patience to seek it. Often, that guidance manifests itself in the inner wisdom we call our conscience.
When we open our hearts wide enough to sense our Higher Power's guidance, we feel a calm serenity. This peace is the beacon that guides us through our troubled feelings, providing clear direction when our minds are busy and confused. When we seek and follow God's will in our lives, we find the contentment and joy that often elude us when we strike out on our own. Fear or doubt may plague us when we attempt to carry out our Higher Power's will, but we've learned to trust the moment of clarity. Our greatest happiness lies in following the will of our loving God.
Just for today: I will seek to strengthen my relationship with my Higher Power. I know from experience that knowledge of my Higher Power's will provides a sense of clarity, direction, and peace.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
More majestic than a cardinal, as shining as a pyx. --Gustave Flaubert
What in the world is a pyx? If we don't have an expert nearby, we'll have to look in a book. There we'll find it defined, explained, fixed. Now what in the world is love? It doesn't live in a tree or a book, so where in the world do we look? Can we find love in the house, maybe swept under the rug? Can we know the feel of it in our hands, see it written on the lines of faces we know? Does it make a sound--maybe laugh and cry? Does it know how to speak, form words carefully, write letters? Is it only written on the heart?
We find love inside us, and our love seeks itself out in others. We find it in the familiar footfall of a brother or sister, the sound of a parent's voice in the next room, and yet, too often we don't express it directly. When we do, our love thrives in all we do together.
What does love have to do with the ordinary facts of life?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The work will teach you how to do it. --Estonian proverb
We learn this spiritual program as we learned to ride a bike or to swim. We could never get it from reading a book. We only learn it by doing it and by following the example of others. As we first entered the program, we may have thought, "Oh I understand this. In twelve meetings I'll have it licked."
Many men have had difficulty trusting, so we try to understand everything before we get involved in it. But as long as we try to figure it out first, we remain on the outside looking in. Doing the practical things in this program - taking inventories and making amends, praying for guidance from our Higher Power, carrying the message to others, selecting a sponsor, will teach us the essentials for spiritual recovery.
Today, I will take the risk of learning by living the spiritual life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It is only the women whose eyes have been washed clear with tears who get the broad vision that makes them little sisters to all the world. --Dorothy Dix
The storms of our lives benefit us like the storms that hit our towns and homes and wash clean the air we breathe. Our storms bring to the surface the issues that plague us. Perhaps we still fear a job with responsibilities. Perhaps we still struggle with the significant other persons in our lives. Possessiveness is a particular storm that often haunts our progress. Storms force us to acknowledge these liabilities that continue to stand in our way, and acknowledgment is the step necessary to letting go.
Recovery is a whole series of storms, storms that help to sprout new growth, storms that flush clean our own clogged drains. The peace that comes after a storm is worth singing about.
Each storm can be likened to a rung on the ladder to wholeness, the ladder to full membership in the healthy human race. The storms make climbing tough, but we get strength with each step. The next storm will be more easily weathered.
If today is a stormy day, let me remember it will freshen the air I breathe.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Self Love
I woke up this morning and I had a hard time for a while, said one recovering man. Then I realized it was because I wasn't liking myself very much. Recovering people often say: I just don't like myself. When will I start liking myself?
The answer is: start now. We can learn to be gentle, loving, and nurturing with ourselves. Of all the recovery behaviors were striving to attain, loving ourselves may be the most difficult, and the most important. If we are habitually harsh and critical toward ourselves, learning to be gentle with ourselves may require dedicated effort.
But what a valuable venture!
By not liking ourselves, we may be perpetuating the discounting, neglect, or abuse we received in childhood from the important people in our life. We didn't like what happened then, but find ourselves copying those who mistreated us by treating ourselves poorly.
We can stop the pattern. We can begin giving ourselves the loving, respectful treatment we deserve.
Instead of criticizing ourselves, we can tell ourselves we performed well enough.
We can wake up in the morning and tell ourselves we deserve a good day.
We can make a commitment to take good care of ourselves throughout the day.
We can recognize that were deserving of love. We can do loving things for ourselves.
We can love other people and let them love us.
People who truly love themselves do not become destructively self centered. They do not abuse others. They do not stop growing and changing. People who love themselves well, learn to love others well too. They continually grow into healthier people, learning that their love was appropriately placed.
Today, I will love myself. If I get caught in the old pattern of not liking myself, I will find a way to get out.
I begin my day with quiet time, finding peace and serenity in my mediation. I carry those feelings with me wherever I am. If anything happens to disturb this peace, I can stop and spend a few minutes with my breath and regain my serenity. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
What You Believe Is What You Will See
We can all things into play by what we believe, what we say, what we envision, what we speak. This is one of the powers we’re learning about.
Much of this dance of life, this universal rhythm, is out of our control. But while we don’t choreograph it, we can work within the part that is ours, with the power that is ours. We do this by what we believe. If we believe that we have to fight the entire world, that we’re separate and apart, and that for the most part those we meet will be our enemies, out to hurt us, than that will most probably be true.
Our beliefs about what we deserve and who God is will change as we journey through our adventures. But there is also much we can do now to participate in changing our beliefs and creating a more desirable world for ourselves.
What are your beliefs? Listen to yourself. Listen to what you think, what you say, how you react. Listen to yourself talk about other people, about what life is really like, and about what always happens to you. Listen to what you say about what you can and cannot do. What you hear yourself say is what you believe. And that is probably what you are used to perceiving as happening.
Try believing something different. Try asking the universe and God to help you change and correct your beliefs. Take an active part in creating your world. Say your new beliefs. Say them aloud. Write them down.
Believe that you deserve love. Believe that universal love is there for you. And you will begin to see exactly what you believe.
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More language of letting go
Only you can assess what to do
It was about my fiftieth skydive. I was determined to master this spinning thing. When my turn came, I went to the door, pulled myself outside, then gave myself the count. Ready, set, go. I released my hold and let myself fall into the air.
At first, I fell stable, belly down. Then that dang spinning thing started. I tried to correct my body posture. That didn’t help. The last time this had happened, I had spent so much time trying to correct the problem, I had lost awareness of my altitude. I had gotten obsessed with the problem and lost track of time– not a good thing to do on the ground, and even worse to do while falling through the air.
I remembered my jump master’s words: What are you going to do, spend the rest of your life trying to gain control? Instead of making further attempts to solve the problem, I would stop it now. By pulling,, I yanked my rip cord. Instead of hearing that whooshing sound, the one the parachute makes when it opens correctly, I heard a heavy thud. I looked up. I had been spinning so fast when I opened that I had a knotted mess of line twists and a wad of material over my head.
I had experienced line twists before– a few twists that could be kicked out with a little effort. This was different. It looked like a Chinese braid over my head.
This just isn’t working, I thought. I pulled my cutaway handle, freeing the knotted mass of stuff over my head, then immediately pulled my reserve parachute. It opened sweetly and immediately. I looked at my altimeter. I was at nine-thousand feet. This was going to be a long ride down.
About five minutes later, I floated back to the ground. I threw my parachute over my shoulder and tromped back to the student room. When asked what happened, I explained my story. It was full of ” should’s.” I should have been able to stop spinning. I shouldn’t have opened so high. I apologized for what I had done and for the fact that my rented parachute, which I cut away so high, was going to be tough to find.
“This wasn’t an ideal situation,” said the manager of the school. “But it’s your life. Only you can decide what to do to save it. It’s up to you and you alone to decide what’s right to do.”
Some situations aren’t ideal. Maybe we shouldn’t be in them in the first place and maybe we should have known better. But the facts are what they are. Don’t let shame stop you from taking care of yourself. What are you going to do?
Talk to other people. Get opinions. Read books. But it’s your life– your relationship, your financial situation, your job, your home. It’s up to you to decide what’s best for you. You’re the one who will ultimately live with the results of any decision you make. Assess the situation, and decide what’s right for you.
Take responsibility for your decisions and for how best to live your life.
God, help me stop waiting for others to approve of what I do or don’t do. Guide me in my decision-making and help me trust the choices I make.
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Looking Deeply
The Good in All by Madisyn Taylor
We can see the good in all when we come from a place of serenity and looking deeply within.
Sometimes we find it difficult to see the good in people, places, or situations that aren’t to our liking. We focus on the things we don’t like in our lives as a way of fueling our efforts to create change. There is nothing inherently wrong with this, and it is one way we make progress. However, if we get too caught up in this way of looking at the world, we lose touch with our ability to sit back and simply say yes to everything on our plates, which is the true starting point for all successful activity. Sometimes what we really need is to encourage ourselves to look deeply into all things in our lives to see the inherent goodness at the heart of everything.
At the core of this inquiry is the practice of unconditional acceptance, which can be scary because we feel as if we are being asked not to change the things we don’t like. But when we think this way, we are still operating on the surface of our lives. In order to feel the beauty and warmth of full acceptance, we have to be willing to sink deeper into the stratum underlying the external manifestation of our lives. This deeper place of being is the origin of all lasting change, yet its paradox is that when we are in it, we often don’t feel the need to change anything. From this place, we experience the pure beauty of the process of being alive, and we see that all things change in their own time. We don’t need to force anything. If there are things that we do need to change, from this place of serenity we create the shift easily, our hands guided by an energy that resides at the very center of our hearts.
In our active, goal-oriented culture, we learn to distrust stillness and to engage in busywork on the surface of life. This tendency can blind us to the good that lies at the heart of all things. But all we have to do to see again is stop for a moment, let go of our preconceptions and our agendas, and settle into the very center of our hearts, remembering that it is only from here that we can truly see. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Many of us in The Program share the memory that we originally drank or used other chemicals to “belong,” to “fit in,” or to “be a part of the crowd.” Others of us fueled our addictions to “get in” — to feel, at least for a short time, that we fitted in with the rest of the human race. Sometimes, the chemicals had desired effect, temporarily assuaging our feelings of apartness. But when the chemicals’ effects wore off, we were left feeling more alone, more left out, more “different” than ever. Do I still sometimes feel that “my case is different?”
Today I Pray
God, may I get over my feeling of being “different” or in some way unique, of not belonging. It was this feeling that led me to my chemical use in the first place. It also kept me from seeing the seriousness of my addiction, since I thought “I am different. I can handle it.” May I now be aware that I do belong, to a vast fellowship of people like me. With every shared experience, my “uniqueness” is disappearing.
Today I Will Remember
I am not unique.
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One More Day
Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though it is hard to realize this.
– Henry Ford
During these most devastating periods f our lives, it is hard to recognzie that we will, in the long run, benefit from the experience. As we live through painful or trying times when we are barely surviving, we certainly are not aware of growing or of learning something.
Yet, in the more quiet times of our lives, when we’re not in pain or just hanging on by a thread, we can see that , yes, I did learn this or, indeed, that event did force me to grow. Chronic illness is no different from other crises, and we are able to inventory ourselves and see healthier attitudes and stronger character as results of what we’ve experienced.
I will take time today to list the ways in which some “bad” experiences have helped me become a better or more mature person.
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Food For Thought
Rebellion
Compulsive overeating may often be a form of rebellion. In the past, the more we tried to diet, the more we rebelled against the diet, and the more we overate. We were rebelling not only against a diet but also against other people, ourselves, and our Higher Power.
We should never consider abstinence as defined by OA to be just another diet. To do so would be to invite further rebellion. We compulsive overeaters seem especially prone to fight constraints of any kind. Rather than constraining us, abstinence is our liberation. We no longer have a diet to rebel against.
When we accept abstinence, we decide to have three measured meals a day with nothing in between, and we decide to avoid our personal binge foods. What those meals will consist of is our choice, and we make the choice daily. All we have to do is plan what we will have, measure it, enjoy it, and then get from one meal to the next without taking the first compulsive bite. Simple. There is no diet to rebel against.
I pray that I will no longer need to rebel.
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One Day At A Time
LOOKING AT THE STARS
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
Oscar Wilde
Before I made the Twelve Steps part of my life, I considered myself to have been in the gutter. My weight had doubled, I was in a major depression, and I was going through the motions of life. Those looking at me from afar saw only a perfect marriage, a perfect career, a perfect home, and perfect children. Although I was blessed, the disease I suffered from day in and day out made it quite obvious to anyone who truly knew me that I was not "looking at the stars." It took my first sponsor to start the healing process for me.
As I began to work Steps One, Two and Three, I felt "different." Nothing had changed . . . everything had changed. It's hard to describe because outwardly I looked the same ... but my entire being opened up. Weight began to come off because I was able to focus on a plan of eating. I found my feelings returned ... the ability to love and accept love came back. My spirituality blossomed once again. I truly felt alive.
One day at a time...
I want to remember each time I find myself in the gutter and giving up hope ... to look at the stars ... and remember that my program works if I will just work it.
~ Mari
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
We find it a waste of time to keep chasing a man who cannot or will not work with you. If you leave such a person alone, he may soon become convinced that he cannot recover by himself. To spend too much time on any one situation is to deny some other alcoholic an opportunity to live and be happy. - Pg. 96 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
By now, most of us start asking 'Am I really an addict? Or is this just a bad mistake?' The pain of separation is setting in. 'How can I cope without drugs? Will I become stupid, boring and dull?' We must realize that these thoughts are our addictions talking to us, luring us.
Higher Power, help me shut my ears to my addictions.
My Feelings Have Force
Today, even though I am feeling out of sorts I will take responsibility for what I am putting out to others. Am I appreciating the efforts people are making for me. Am I looking into and beyond their faces as they are looking into mine. Am I giving them half a chance to help me and am I giving myself half a chance to be helped? As I move through the experiences of my day, I will try to remain conscious of others efforts and well as my own. I will appreciate what is being done for me.
I let good in
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Now and then with a little time, we stop working one through nine. The price of recovery is eternal vigilance. Steps Ten, Eleven, and Twelve insure that we keep working One through Nine.
No matter how much time I have from my last drink or drug, I am only Twelve Steps away from the next.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Don't force solutions.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I begin my day with quiet time, finding peace and serenity in my mediation. I carry those feelings with me wherever I am. If anything happens to disturb this peace, I can stop and spend a few minutes with my breath and regain my serenity.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Alcoholic's National Anthem; 'I was always on my mind...I was always on my mind' - Ken D.
bluidkiti
05-08-2021, 11:16 AM
May 17
Daily Reflections
. . . . AND FORGIVE
Under very trying conditions I have had, again and again,
to forgive others--also myself.
AS BILL SEE IT p. 268
Forgiveness of self and forgiveness of others are just two
currents in the same river, both hindered or shut off
completely by the dam of resentment. Once that dam is lifted,
both currents can flow. The Steps of A.A. allow me to see how
resentment has built up and subsequently blocked off this
flow in my life. The Steps provide a way by which my
resentments may - by the grace of God as I understand Him -
be lifted. It is as a result of this solution that I can find
the necessary grace which enables me to forgive myself and
others.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
A lot of well-meaning people treat alcoholics like the priest
and the Levite. They pass by on the other side by scorning
them and telling them what low people they are, with no
willpower. Whereas, they really have fallen for alcohol, in
the same way as the man in the story fell among robbers. And
the member of A.A. who is working with others is like the
Good Samaritan. Am I moved with compassion? Do I take care
of another alcoholic whenever I can?
Meditation For The Day
I must constantly live in preparation for something better to
come. All of life is a preparation for something better. I must
anticipate the morning to come. I must feel, in the night of
sorrow, that understanding joy that tells of confident
expectation of better things to come. "Sorrow may endure for
a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Know that God has
something better in store for you, as long as you are making
yourself ready for it. All your existence in this world is a
training for a better life to come.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that when life is over, I will return to an eternal,
spaceless life with God. I pray that I may make this life a
preparation for a better life to come.
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As Bill Sees It
Beyond Agnosticism, p. 137
We of agnostic temperament found that as soon as we were able to
lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a
Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even
though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend
that Power, which is God.
<< << << >> >> >>
"Many people soberly assure me that man has no better place in the
universe than that of another competing organism, fighting its way
through life only to perish in the end. Hearing this, I feel that I still
prefer to cling to the so-called illusion of religion, which in my own
experience has meaningfully told me something very different."
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 46
2. Letter, 1946
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Walk in Dry Places
Rehearsing Outcomes
Serenity
Imagination is undeniably a human faculty that accounts for much progress. Compulsive people, however, can use imagination in a most destructive way.
One destructive practice is that of rehearsing i our minds the outcome of some treat or problem, usually expecting the worst. While we should not avoid facing real problems, it's wrong to assume that the worst will always happen. This tendency to anticipate the worst possible outcome can actually produce the very outcome we'd like to avoid, thus making it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We can deal with such pessimistic thinking by reminding ourselves that God is in charge and will bring our good to pass in just the right way.If we're going to rehearse anything, let it be an outcome that includes the best for everybody, including ourselves.
I'll expect the best today, knowing that all outcomes and results are in God's hands.
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Keep It Simple
Each day provides its own gifts.---Ruth P. Freedman
Spiritual growth is the greatest gift we can receive. And we earn it through taking risks. There is much risk involved in working the Steps: The risk of admitting that we're out of control. The risk of turning our will and lives over to a Power greater than ourselves. The risk of letting go of character defects. The risk of making amends to people we've harmed. The risk of admitting our wrongs. The risk of telling our stories as we carry the message of hope. To grow spiritually, we need these adventures. These challenges. These risk.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to take the risks that I need in order to grow.
Action for the Day: I will look at today as an adventure with my Higher Power. I will list the fears I'll need to let go of.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Loving allows us to live and through living we grow in loving. --Evelyn Mandel
Many days it seems too easy to be centered on ourselves, wondering if others love us rather than loving others. On those days, we may have to act "as if" we love the persons who live on our pathways. The unexpected gift is that we do begin to feel both love and loved. Living becomes easier, and so does loving. Acting "as if" is a good way of learning those behaviors that don't feel natural. And in time, acting "as if" is necessary no more.
I can behave in any way I decide to. I can choose to think about others, and love them. I can choose to forget myself, today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
We have traveled a rocky road, there is no mistake about that. We have had long rendezvous with hurt pride, frustration, self-pity, misunderstanding and fear. These are not pleasant companions. We have been driven to maudlin sympathy, to bitter resentment. Some of us veered from extreme to extreme, ever hoping that one day our loved ones would be themselves once more.
pp. 104-105
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
Needless to say, this was not pleasurable drinking. I had long since given up any pretense of the social cocktail hour. This was drinking in sheer desperation, alone and locked behind my own door. Alone in the relative safety of my home because I knew I dare not risk the danger of blacking out in some public place ot at the wheel of a car. I could no longer gauge my capacity, and it might ne the second or the tenth drink that would erase my consciousness.
p. 270
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
But alas, this bright scene was not long in darkening. Confusion replaced serenity. It was found that some drunks yearned for education, but doubted if they were alcoholics. The personality defects of others could be cured maybe with a loan. Some were club-minded, but it was just a question of taking care of the lonely heart. Sometimes the swarming applicants would go for all three floors. Some would start at the top and come through to the bottom, becoming club members; others started in the club, pitched a binge, were hospitalized, then graduated to education on the third floor. It was a beehive of activity, all right, but unlike a beehive, it was confusion compounded. An A.A. group, as such, simply couldn't handle this sort of project. All too late that was discovered. Then came the inevitable explosion - something like that day the boiler burst in Wombley's Clapboard Factory. A chill chokedamp of fear and frustration fell over the group.
pp. 148-149
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Do you know how important now is? Enjoy it as much as you can,
because no matter how much you want to hold on to "now," it's going
to be "was."
--Sid Caesar
All yesterdays are canceled, and tomorrow is but a speculation, today
is the day God has made.
--SweetyZee
If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started
with something called labor.
--Cited in Even More of...The Best of BITS & PIECES
Aristotle said: "Those who say there is only one road to Rome don't
know Rome very well." New Thought teaches us not only to tolerate
but to honor all paths to God. All religions have love at their core.
We are meant to learn to love one another, love God and love
ourselves. No religion is bigger than God.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"In forgiving ourselves, we make the journey from guilt for what we
have done (or not done) to celebration of what we have become."
--Joan Borysenko
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
TOLERANCE
"Tolerance is the positive and
cordial effort to understand
another's beliefs, practices and
habits without necessarily sharing
or accepting them."
--Joshua Liebman
Today I am able to tolerate people, listen to what they are saying and
if I do not agree with them, it is okay! I do not have to agree with a
person to tolerate or befriend him.
This is a new attitude for me and is part of my spiritual program.
When I was drinking, I would not listen to people who had ideas
different to mine. I would not tolerate people who had a different
philosophy on life. Other religions were discounted as being cultish,
crude or superstitious. I have learned that my disease of alcoholism
made me very arrogant and narrow in my attitude to life - I rejected
two-thirds of the world as being heretical!
Today I can tolerate and learn from people who view God, the world
and morality differently from me. Spirituality is teaching me to be
open and accepting.
Lord, may I find traces of Your love in different philosophies and
religions.
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Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and
supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made
known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all
understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus.
Phil. 4:6-7
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow
to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the
righteousness of God.
James 1:19-20
"You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because
the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world."
I John 4:4
"For we walk by faith, not by sight."
2 Corinthians 5:7
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Daily Inspiration
Change first from the inside and the other things will follow. Lord, bless me the desire to become a better person and the firmness of will to succeed because I know that together we have the power to change my life.
God never promised to make your troubles go away, but He did promise to give you the strength and power to overcome them. Lord, when I am weak, strengthen me, when I forget, remind me and when the day is done, accept my thanksgiving because without You I am nothing.
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NA Just For Today
"Defects"
"We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
Step Six
After taking the Fifth Step, many of us spend some time considering "the exact nature of our wrongs" and the part they'd played in making us who we were. What would our lives be like without, say, our arrogance?
Sure, arrogance had kept us apart from our fellows, preventing us from enjoying and learning from them. But arrogance had also served us well, propping up our ego in the face of critically low self-esteem. What advantage would be gained if our arrogance were removed, and what support would we be left with?
With arrogance gone, we would be one step closer to being restored to our proper place among others. We would become capable of appreciating their company and their wisdom and their challenges as their equals. Our support and guidance would come, if we chose, from the care offered us by our Higher Power; "low self-esteem" would cease to be an issue.
One by one, we examined our character defects this way, and found them all defective—after all, that's why they're called defects. And were we entirely ready to have God remove all of them? Yes.
Just for today: I will thoroughly consider all my defects of character to discover whether I am ready to have the God of my understanding remove them.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Growth is the only evidence of life. --John, Cardinal Newman
We should be thankful we can never reach complete serenity. If we could, we would never have the need to improve ourselves. We would stop growing, because there would be no reason to learn any more than we already know, and we would become bored. Even the things which seem so serene in nature usually contain a struggle within. A lake, with a swan gliding slowly across it, seems a perfect picture of serenity. But, unseen below the surface, fish, turtles, and frogs struggle each day for survival.
The important thing is to accept the struggles as a part of the beauty of life, not as blemishes on it.
What struggles shall help me grow better today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
What sort of God would it be who only pushed from without? --Goethe
Oh, we hate to be pushed! We get upset and angry when someone is pushing on us. What man likes it? Sometimes God does pushing, and it takes a while for us to realize it is God's pressure on us that we feel. Our natural reaction is to resist and push back.
When we keep getting headaches or stomachaches, maybe we should listen for the message. An unsettled feeling in our lives about women, money, health, work, or something else may carry a message for us. God might be pushing from within. In this program we try to develop our ability to hear God's will for us. Sometimes a problem is, in fact, a spiritual message. When we stop resisting and start listening, we soon grow wiser and stronger.
God, your message is not always clear to me. Today, I will try to put aside my own habit of pushing back so I can have a clearer mind to receive it.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Loving allows us to live and through living we grow in loving. --Evelyn Mandel
Many days it seems too easy to be centered on ourselves, wondering if others love us rather than loving others. On those days, we may have to act "as if" we love the persons who live on our pathways. The unexpected gift is that we do begin to feel both love and loved. Living becomes easier, and so does loving. Acting "as if" is a good way of learning those behaviors that don't feel natural. And in time, acting "as if" is necessary no more.
I can behave in any way I decide to. I can choose to think about others, and love them. I can choose to forget myself, today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Boundaries
Sometimes, life and people seem to push and push. Because we are so used to pain, we may tell ourselves it doesn't hurt. Because we are so used to people controlling and manipulating us, we may tell ourselves there is something wrong with us.
There's nothing wrong with us. Life is pushing and hurting to get our attention. Sometimes, the pain and pushing are pointing toward a lesson. The lesson may be that we've become too controlling. Or maybe were being pushed to own our power to take care of ourselves. The issue is boundaries.
If something or somebody is pushing us to our limit, that's exactly what's happening: were being pushed to our limits. We can be grateful for the lesson that's here to help us explore and set our boundaries.
Today, I will give myself permission to set the limits I want and need to set in my life.
Today I know that with every in-breath I am breathing in powerful healing energy. And with every out-breath I am letting go. I am letting go of all anxiety, all stress...all negativity that is standing in the way of my feeling good about myself. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Happiness Is Within Reach
What we need to be happy is a question we often forget to ask ourselves.
Is there something you could do for yourself that would make you happy, put a spring in your step, a smile in your heart? Many of us haven’t asked ourselves this question enough. Some of us haven’t asked it at all. Or if we have, we haven’t answered it. Instead we diligently search for our path, for the way through our lives, through our current situation or circumstance, never taking time to ask ourselves what would make us happy and what would feel good to us. Then we wonder why life feels so hard, so difficult and unrewarding.
Discovering what would make us happy can help us through any difficulty in life. It can help us through the quieter moments of our day. It can help us make larger, more significant decisions. It can help us in our work. Especially if we look in our hearts and answer honestly.
What would make you happy? It’s a simple question, but one with profound consequences. Asking and answering that question, then acting on it, is often our path– a path that will lead to the next step, a path that is in our best interests. We will be choosing our destiny. And the destiny we’re choosing is joy.
What would make you happy? Ask yourself often. Think about your answer. You may well find that the answer is within reach.
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More language of letting go
Sometimes it takes a lot to say when
At times we say when with relative ease. We say, “No thanks,this isn’t right for me,” and we walk away. There are other times when it’s harder to set a boundary or enforce a new limit or decision with people.
Jan and Patrick had a tough time saying when to their grown daughter, Elizabeth. Elizabeth had moved out of the house. She wanted her independence. But she still wanted her mom and dad’s money. She would make deals with them– help me buy this car, or put this deposit on an apartment, then I’ll pay you back. Then she wouldn’t keep her part of the bargain. Mom and Dad continued to send money, even though they had threatened, warned, and tried to deal with the situation in a rational, loving way. They didn’t want to alienate their daughter. And they didn’t want her suffering, which is what Elizabeth claimed she would do if she was “cut off.”
One day, Jan and Patrick sat down with the calculator. They figured out how much support they’d been contributing to Elizabeth’s life. They decided it was time to shut off the money supply. “The only time she called was when she wanted money anyway,” Patrick said. “Jan and I figured that there wasn’t much left of the relationship to lose.”
They gave Elizabeth a three-month warning. The money faucet was shutting off on this date. When that date arrived, the money stopped. A few days later, Elizabeth called back, ranting and raving. She said not only she, but all her friends, thought her parents were despicable for not helping her out, the way good parents should.
“The guilt I felt was overwhelming,” Jan said. “But I also knew that was one of Elizabeth’s favorite tricks. She used our guilt to control us. It was painful. Setting this boundary, this limit, took most of our energy for that entire year– the year of cutting Elizabeth off financially, pushing her out of the nest.”
It’s now been a few years since Jan and Patrick set that boundary. Elizabeth has taken financial responsibility for herself. She didn’t starve, nor did she go homeless. She was much more resourceful than her parents believed. Jan and Patrick still send her gifts, still take her out for dinner, but they no longer support their grown daughter financially. Their relationship with their daughter has shifted onto new ground. Conversations are no longer about money.
Saying when can be uncomfortable for the person saying it, and for the person hearing it. It sometimes involves more than an immediate decision or reaction; it involves a lifestyle change for the people involved. You may need to stand behind your when with focus, dedication, and commitment.
Don’t expect it to be easy to say when and mean what you say. Leave room for other people to have their emotions about your boundaries; give yourself room to have some feelings,too.
God, grant me the energy and commitment to say when and stand behind it.
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Exercising Flexibility
Mind Stretching by Madisyn Taylor
When we are flexible we allow for situations we could not have planned and so the world continues to surprise and delight us.
Flexibility is the capacity to bend without breaking, as well as a continual willingness to change or be changed in order to accommodate new circumstances. People with flexible minds are open to shifting their course when necessary or useful; they are not overly attached to things going the way they had planned. This enables them to take advantage of opportunities that a more rigid person would miss out on. It can also make life a lot more fun. When we are flexible, we allow for situations we could not have planned, and so the world continues to surprise and delight us.
Since reality is in a constant state of flux, it doesn’t make sense to be rigid or to cling to any one idea of what is happening or what is going to happen. We are more in tune with reality when we are flexible. Being in tune enables us to adjust to the external environment and other people as they change and grow. When we are rigid or stuck in our ways, instead of adjusting to the world around us we hunker down, clinging to a concept of reality rather than reality itself. When we do this, we cut ourselves off from life, and we miss out on valuable opportunities, as well as a lot of joy.
Just as we create flexibility in our bodies by stretching physically, we can create limberness in our minds by stretching mentally. Every day we have the opportunity to exercise our flexibility. We can do this in small ways such as taking a different route home from work or changing our exercise routine. On a larger scale, we can rearrange the furniture or redo a room in our house. If these are things we already do regularly, we can stretch our minds by imagining several different possibilities for how the next year will unfold. As we do this, our minds become more supple and open, and when changes come our way, we are able to accommodate and flow with the new reality. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
If we felt guilty, degraded or ashamed or either our addiction itself or the things we did while “under the influence,” that served to magnify our feelings of being outcasts. On occasion, we secretly feared or actually believed that we deserved every painful feeling: we thought, at times, that we truly were outsiders. The dark tunnel of our lives seemed formidable and unending. We couldn’t even voice our feelings and could hardly bear to think about them. So we soon drank or used again. Do I remember well what it used to be like?
Today I Pray
May I remember how often, during my days of using chemicals, I felt alone with my shame and guilt. The phony jollity of a drinking party or the shallow relationships struck up at a bar could not keep me from feeling like an outsider. May I appreciate the chance to make new friends through the fellowship of the group. May I know that my relationships now will be saner, less dependent, more mature.
Today I Will Remember
Thank God for new Friends.
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One More Day
When you did another out of trouble, you find a place to bury your own.
– Anonymous
When acting the way people expect us to, we may help others, but does it really come from the heart? Frequently people act not out of compassion or caring, but because that’s how they feel others will expect them to behave.
When helping others in a completely unselfish manner, we need no kudos from anyone, for we have no ulterior motive other than helpfulness. Willingness to assist other people with their problems crates soe freedom from our own.
I will know I have become less selfish when I don’t have a moment’s hesitation before helping another human being.
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Food For Thought
Hunger Is a Habit
Have you ever had the experience of being so interested in what you were doing that meal time came and went before you realized that it was time to eat? Because you were not thinking about food, you were not aware of being hungry.
Eating provides a diversion from the tasks of the day. It is something to do when we can't think of anything else to do. Often our "hunger" in anticipation of a meal arises because we look at the clock and see that it is almost time to eat. Instead of being aware of how we are feeling internally, we allow habit and external cues to stimulate our appetite. "It is noon; therefore, I must be hungry."
The more we can concentrate on activities other than eating, the more successful we will be in controlling our disease. We need a program, one which gives meaning to our days and satisfaction to our spirits. Our Higher Power will lift us out of the rut of destructive habits if we sincerely give our lives into His care.
Teach me constructive habits, I pray.
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One Day At A Time
The Human Spirit
The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.
Unknown
I spent most years of my life feeling like a damaged person, one who was permanently and irreparably defective. I am the survivor of abuse, and had been a practicing compulsive overeater since early childhood. The only way I knew myself was broken, hopeless, and damaged beyond repair. On the days when I could manage to have a goal, my goal was to make the best of it ... and to simply survive the remainder of my days on this earth.
Recovery has transformed my view of myself and my experience of life. In receiving the love, support and guidance of my friends on this journey I began to see a glimmer of hope. With the loving care of my sponsors I began to take the Steps, and I learned to live them out ... one day at a time.
In taking the Steps and living them out, I found my buried spirit, and I found that it was alive and well! In recovery I became reacquainted with the spiritual part of myself that I thought was lost forever. In this connection, I learned to live, laugh, and hope again. My spiritual connection is stronger than anything that can happen to me. This is the truth in my life today, and it transforms me to peace, joy, and love greater than I had ever dreamed.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will practice Step Eleven, and improve my conscious contact with God. I will choose to live in connection with my inner spirit.
~ Cate
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Our Society then entered a fearsome and exciting adolescent period. The test that it faced was this: Could these large numbers of erstwhile erratic alcoholics successfully meet and work together? Would there be quarrels over membership, leadership, and money? Would there be strivings for power and prestige? Would there be schisms which would split A.A. apart? Soon A.A. was beset by these very problems on every side and in every group. But out of this frightening and at first disrupting experience the conviction grew that A.A.'s had to hang together or die separately. We had to unify our Fellowship or pass off the scene. - Pgs. xviii-xix - 4th. Edition - Forward To The Second Edition
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We are told we have free will. Yet as that fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort beckons, pleads for us to partake, we often feel there is no free will in addiction. When that 'force' pleads with us, we must pray for God's will, not ours, and we must make a contact with a clean and sober person in recovery.
Please God, as I understand You, help me find a person in the fellowship to talk to, now.
Giving My Body a Voice
Today I will write in my journal as a part of my body. I might say something like, 'I am your back and I want to cry. I am tired of being silent and this is what I want you to hear.' Or maybe I'll say, 'as your stomach I want to rebel. I want to relax, and let go of all this'..'Or I am your legs and I wish you appreciated me. I carry you all around the world but you are constantly wishing I were different.' I will let my body parts have a voice and scribble their thoughts onto paper them I will read what they have said to me and wonder about what they have told me.
I will put pen to paper.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Whatever our problems, when we dwell on the problem, the problem gets bigger. When we dwell on the solution, the solution gets bigger.
I don't tell my Higher Power how big my problem is, I tell my problem how big my Higher Power is.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
'Why' questions keep you in the problem while 'How' questions keep you in the solution.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know that with every in-breath I am breathing in powerful healing energy. And with every out-breath I am letting go. I am letting go of all anxiety, all stress, all negativity that is standing in the way of my feeling good about myself.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Only those who have traveled the road know where the holes are deepest. - Chinese Proverb.
bluidkiti
05-08-2021, 11:17 AM
May 18
Daily Reflections
FREEDOM TO BE ME
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development,
we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are
going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 83
My first true freedom is the freedom not to have to take
a drink today. If I truly want it, I will work the Twelve
Steps and the happiness of this freedom will come to me
through the Steps - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.
Other freedoms will follow, and inventorying them is a
new happiness. I had a new freedom today, the freedom to
be me. I have the freedom to be the best me I have ever
been.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We're in A.A. for two main reasons: to keep sober ourselves
and to help others to keep sober. It's a well known fact
that helping others is a big part of keeping sober yourself.
It's also been proved that it's very hard to keep sober all
by yourself. A lot of people have tried it and failed. They
come to a few A.A. meetings and then stay sober alone for a
few months, but usually they eventually get drunk. Do I know
that I can't stay sober successfully alone?
Meditation For The Day
Look by faith into that place beyond space or time where God
dwells and whence you came and to which you shall eventually
return. "Look unto Him and be saved." To look beyond material
things is within the power of everyone's imagination. Faith's
look saves you from despair. Faith's look saves you from worry
and care. Faith's look brings a peace beyond all understanding.
Faith's look brings you all the strength you need. Faith's look
gives you a new and vital power and a wonderful peace and
serenity.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may have faith's look. I pray that by faith I
may look beyond the now to eternal life.
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As Bill Sees It
Two Roads for the Oldtimer, p. 138
The founders of many groups ultimately divide into two classes
known in A.A. slang as "elder statesmen" and "bleeding deacons."
The elder statesman sees the wisdom of the group's decision to run
itself and holds no resentment over his reduced status. His judgment,
fortified by considerable experience, is sound; he is willing to sit
quietly on the side lines patiently awaiting developments.
The bleeding deacon is just as surely convinced that the group cannot
get along without him. He constantly connives for re-election to
office and continues to be consumed with self-pity. Nearly every
oldtimer in our Society has gone through this process in some degree.
Happily, most of them survive and live to become elder statesmen.
They become the real and permanent leadership of A.A.
12 & 12, p. 135
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Walk in Dry Places
No Limits on our Higher power
The Spiritual Way
One ancient saying claims that "with God, all things are possible." That's quite a statement, one we may claim to believe without living as though we do.
What it really mens is that God exists outside the conditions and restrictions that make our own lives so limited. The more we can move into conscious contact with God, the more freedom and power we will experience.
It might be said that all real human progress is the same order. Every advancement in science really reveals more information about God and the universe. We are always discovering new possibilites for humankind as we stretch the frontiers of knowledge.
Our most serious lag is in learning to understand ourselves and each other. It is humbling to realize taht the ideas we're using in Twelve Step programs have been around for centuries. Fced with impossible problmes, we must remember that God can solve these problmes if only we ask.
I'll follow today the old idea of working as if everything depended on me and believing as if everything depended on God.
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Keep It Simple
You cannot plan the future by the past.---Edmund Burke
We got tried of how we were living. We honestly looked at our life. We saw that alcohol and other drugs controlled our life. We met others who understood us. And we came to believe that a Power
greater than ourselves could help us. We turned our will and our life over to this Power. In so doing, we learned that life doesn't take place in the past or in the future. We find our program in the present.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I'll leave the past in the past.
I pray that I'll walk into each moment with my Higher Power.
Action for the Day: The only time we revisit the past is when we tell our story. Today, I'll tell my story to someone. I'll tell what really happened. I'll tell what life is like now.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . in order to feel anything you need strength . . . --Anna Maria Ortese
Strength for any task, to withstand any pressure, to find the solution to any problem, is always as close as our very breath. We expend all our energy, wearing ourselves down, even getting sick from worry when we fail to turn to the source of strength that is ours for the taking.
We are offered, moment by moment, opportunities to experience the rapture of life. We have the chance, with recovery, to trust our senses, to turn ourselves over to the moment, knowing we can survive every experience, knowing we are guaranteed new knowledge, a greater awareness of the meaning of our own lives when we're fully attuned to the experiences that are uniquely our own, right here, right now.
Our strength increases as we flex it, not unlike muscles. The more we turn to that greater power, the more available that source of strength becomes. With practice, it becomes habitual to let God help us withstand all pressures, solve every problem. In time, the pressures and problems seem to exist no more. We learn to let our higher power circumvent the difficulties in our lives. Free at last; we become free at last to feel the real joys of living.
All the strength I need to face anything that's worrying me is at hand. I will let go and let God help me today.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Our loyalty and the desire that our husbands hold up their heads and be like other men have begotten all sorts of predicaments. We have been unselfish and self-sacrificing. We have told innumerable lies to protect our pride and our husbands’ reputations. We have prayed, we have begged, we have been patient. We have struck out viciously. We have run away. We have been hysterical. We have been terror stricken. We have sought sympathy. We have had retaliatory love affairs with other men.
p. 105
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
The next three years saw me in sanitariums, once in a ten-day coma, from which I very nearly did not recover, in and out of hospitals or confined at home with day and night nurses. By now I wanted to die but had lost the courage even to take my life. I was trapped, and for the life of me I did not know how or why this had happened to me. And all the while my fear fed a growing conviction that before long it would be necessary for me to be put away in some institution. People didn't behave this way outside of an asylum. I had heartsickness, shame, and fear bordering on panic, and no complete escape any longer except in oblivion. Certainly, now, anyone would have agreed that only a miracle could prevent my final breakdown. But how does one get a prescription for miracle?
p. 270
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
When that lifted, a wonderful thing had happened. The head promoter wrote the Foundation office. He said he wished he'd paid some attention to A.A. experience. Then he did something else that was to become an A.A. classic. It all went on a little card about golf-score size. The cover read: "Middleton Group #1. Rule #62." Once the card was unfolded, a single pungent sentence leaped to the eye: "Don't take yourself too dam* seriously."
p. 149
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Self-esteem is so delicate a flower that praise tends to make it bloom,
while discouragement often nips it in the bud.
--Alex F. Osborn
There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always
the same.
--Chinese Proverb
"People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does
bathing; that's why we recommend it daily."
--Zig Ziglar
"No matter what you have done to this moment, you get 24 brand-new
hours to spend every single day."
--Brian Tracy
"Make sure you have finished speaking before your audience has
finished listening."
--Dorothy Sarnoff
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FAITH
"Faith has need of the whole truth."
--Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
Faith is a journey that ends in God. Our understanding of imperfection
teaches us to look beyond ourselves into the truth that is yet to be
revealed. Our daily attitude adjustments bring us, step by step, to that
truth and freedom that awaits us in the future.
Sufficient today to know that we are not God and nobody has all the
answers. The hardest part of being a human being is accepting the
limitations of our lives. Things happen without our involvement. We
need not be there for existence to happen; there is life beyond me! God
holds the world together, not me. Truth is in me but also beyond me. In
this sense my faith is enriched by others, and at some point in the
future we will all become ONE in truth.
As I look to the future I see the Oneness of tomorrow.
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"I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and
want. I can do all things in Him who strengthens me."
Philippians 4:12b-13
"Great is our Lord, and mighty in power; His understanding is
infinite."
Psalms 147:5
Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:39
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Daily Inspiration
If you are stressed, you are probably makings things more important than they really are. Lord, I pray for clarity of thought and calmness of spirit because I know that when my heart grows weary, You send me peace.
Joy does not depend on your circumstances, but rather on your triumph over your circumstances. Lord, my joy comes from within where Your spirit fills my soul and You bless me with Your strength.
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NA Just For Today
Friends And Amends—Keeping It Simple
"We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
Step Nine
In every relationship, we don't always handle things the way we would have hoped. But friendships don't have to end when we make mistakes; instead, we can make amends. If we are sincerely willing to accept the responsibilities involved in friendship and make the amends we owe, those friendships can become stronger and richer than ever.
Making amends is simple. We approach the person we have harmed and say, "I was wrong." Sometimes we avoid getting to the point, evading an admission of our own part in the affair. But that frustrates the intent of the Ninth Step. To make effective amends, we have to keep it simple: we admit our part, and leave it at that.
There will be times when our friends won't accept our amends. Perhaps they need time to process what has happened. If that is the case, we must give them that time. After all, we were the ones in the wrong, not them. We have done our part; the rest is out of our hands.
Just for today: I want to be a responsible friend. I will strive to keep it simple when making amends.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself; for every man has need to be forgiven.
--Thomas Fuller
We have all seen adventure movies in which the heroes or villains are caught on a bridge that collapses. As they fall to whatever lies below, they are perhaps able to climb to one side or the other. But for the time being, their ability to cross between the two sides is gone.
When we have been hurt by people in our lives, or when we have hurt others, mutual forgiveness is needed in order to rebuild the trust between us. It is very much like rebuilding a bridge--one piece at a time. We take cautious steps at first--testing the safety and strength of our bridge.
When two people have become separated by loss or anger, it is forgiveness that can rebuild the bridge between them. Forgiveness needs time and so does the rebuilding of trust.
Can I begin to rebuild a friendship today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
One should learn to enjoy the neighbor's garden, however small; the roses straggling over the fence, the scent of lilacs drifting across the road. --Henry Van Dyke
There are many gifts around us which we overlook when we're busy dealing with our anxieties and obligations. We talk about burning out from our high-intensity lifestyles. We act as though nothing would get done if we didn't do it ourselves. We get so engrossed in fighting with the frustrations of life that we fail to see the good things coming our way that took no effort on our part.
As we look around us this very moment, what good things do we find? Has a friend given a warm hello? Is the sun shining? The rain falling? Has the traffic flowed smoothly? We have no claim on these generous events, and we can't say God smiles on us when we have them or He frowns when we don't. We can say there are always generous forces coming our way which comfort and heal us. We only need to take time to enjoy them.
Today, I will take some quiet moments to notice the good things coming my way. I will be grateful for them.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . in order to feel anything you need strength . . . --Anna Maria Ortese
Strength for any task, to withstand any pressure, to find the solution to any problem, is always as close as our very breath. We expend all our energy, wearing ourselves down, even getting sick from worry when we fail to turn to the source of strength that is ours for the taking.
We are offered, moment by moment, opportunities to experience the rapture of life. We have the chance, with recovery, to trust our senses, to turn ourselves over to the moment, knowing we can survive every experience, knowing we are guaranteed new knowledge, a greater awareness of the meaning of our own lives when we're fully attuned to the experiences that are uniquely our own, right here, right now.
Our strength increases as we flex it, not unlike muscles. The more we turn to that greater power, the more available that source of strength becomes. With practice, it becomes habitual to let God help us withstand all pressures, solve every problem. In time, the pressures and problems seem to exist no more. We learn to let our higher power circumvent the difficulties in our lives. Free at last; we become free at last to feel the real joys of living.
All the strength I need to face anything that's worrying me is at hand. I will let go and let God help me today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Don't stop living your life!
So often, when a problem occurs, inside or around us, we revert to thinking that if we put our life on hold we can positively contribute to the solution. If a relationships isn't working, if we face a difficult decision, if were feeling depressed, we may put our life on hold and torment ourselves with obsessive thoughts.
Abandoning our life or routines contributes to the problem and delays us from finding the solution.
Frequently, the solution comes when we let go enough to live our life, return to our routine, and stop obsessing about the problem.
Sometimes, even if we don't feel like we have let go or can let go, we can act as if we have, and that will help bring about the letting go we desire.
You don't have to give up your power to problems. You can take your focus off your problem and direct it to your life, trusting that doing so will bring you closer to a solution.
Today, I will go on living my life and tending to my routine. I will decide, as often as I need to, to stop obsessing about whatever is bothering me. If I don't feel like letting go of a particular thing, I will act as if I have let go of it until my feelings match my behavior.
Today I look beyond the immediate moment of satisfaction and decide what is good for me in the larger picture of my life. Today I have faith and patience and can wait to make loving and positive choices. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Love All of Yourself
Do more than just accept yourself, tolerate yourself, put up with yourself, endure who you are. Love yourself.
There came a time in my life when I simply could no longer put up with putting up with myself. I had talked about self-love. I had said aloud that I loved myself. The words were good, but they didn’t ring true. I had to actually begin experiencing and practicing love for myself. It became the next step on my path.
To live in a magical way, one in which you connect with the universe, loving yourself isn’t optional. It comes first. To hear the quiet voice of your heart so you know when you’re being led, to hear your thoughts so you can see what you really believe, to trust, and open your heart, you must first experience love for yourself.
Have you abandoned yourself? Let yourself see if that’s true, feel if that’s true. Then learn to experience love for yourself.
Learn to love the way you handle things. Love your unique way of learning, growing, and seeing things. Love where you’ve been. Love what you’ve done. Love where you are, and what you’re doing now.
Love how you look, smell, and feel. Love the color of your eyes, the color of your hair, and the radiance in your heart. Love how you laugh. Love how you cry. Love your mistakes, and love all the good you’ve done. Love it all. Love all of you.
Step into love for yourself, and the universe will reflect that love back to you.
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More language of letting go
Use your creativity in saying when
Grace was the single parent of a seventeen-year-old son– Shawn. Shawn was charismatic, powerful, strong-willed, intelligent, and chemically dependent.
Grace loved Shawn deeply. But she also felt trapped by his rebellious teenage years, coupled with his drug and alcohol usage. Shawn had been through treatment once, did well for a while, then had relapsed. Shawn had a driver’s license and a car. In his sober times, Shawn handled the responsibility of the car well. And the agreement was, if Shawn relapsed, he would relinquish the keys.
The problem with chemical dependency is that denial and lying go hand in hand with the disease. When Shawn began using again, he also began lying to his mother. It didn’t take long for Grace to see and understand what was going on. She knew what her boundary was. Take away the car.
Grace was clear about what she could and couldn’t do. She couldn’t make Shawn stay sober, but she could refuse to allow him to drive.
Grace took action. She grabbed a screwdriver, went outside, removed both license plates form Shawn’s car, and drove directly to the post office. She then mailed the license plates to a friend of the family and asked the friend to keep the plates until Shawn sobered up.
Shawn knew a boundary had just been clearly set. Six months later, when his plates were returned to him, he was sober and ready to respect the responsibility involved with driving an automobile.
Sometimes, it’s not enough just to stay when. We need to get creative in how we say it,too.
God, help me know that you will always be there to guide me in setting limits, when it is my responsibility and in my best interests to enforce a particular boundary.
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Putting Our Tools to Use
Bringing Inspiration into Form by Madisyn Taylor
We have all built up a toolbox of unique tools to help us navigate life, we just need to use them.
Every craftsperson has a toolbox full of tools and a number of techniques to help them bring inspiration into form. In the same way, throughout our lives, we have discovered our own life tools and techniques—the ways and means that have helped us create our lives up to this point. Sometimes we forget about the tools and skills we’ve acquired, and we wonder why we aren’t moving forward. At times like these, it might just be a matter of remembering what we already know, and rediscovering the tools we already have at our disposal.
In the process of becoming who we are and creating our lives, we have all gone through the experience of being inspired to do something and then finding the tools we needed to do it. If we look back, we may be able to remember that we used, for example, the tool of writing every day in order to clarify our intentions. We may also have used the tools of ritual, meditation, or visualization to make something happen. In addition, we may have been fueled by a new idea about how the universe works, which is what gave us the inspiration to use these tools.
In order for ideas to be powerful, they must be imbued with the energy of our engagement with them, and in order for tools to be effective they must be put to use. This sounds obvious, but often we fall into the habit of thinking we are engaging with ideas and using tools by virtue of the fact that we are reading about them, or listening to other people talk about them. In truth, using our tools is a very personal action, one we must take on behalf of ourselves. Like artists, we are each unique and no two of us will receive the same inspiration, nor will we bring it into form in the same two ways. To discover the truth of our own vision, we must take action by remembering our tools and putting them to use. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I considered myself a “loner” in the days when I was actively addicted. Although I was often with other people — saw them, heard them, touched them–most of my important dialogues were with my inner self. I was certain that nobody else would ever understand. Considering my former opinion of myself, it’s likely that I didn’t want anybody to understand. I smiled through gritted teeth even as I was dying on the inside. Have my insides begun to match my outside since I’ve been in The Program?
Today I Pray
May my physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual selves become one, a while person again. I thank my Higher Power for showing me how to match my outside to my inside, to laugh when I feel like laughing, to cry when I feel sad, to recognize my own anger or fear or guilt. I pray for wholeness.
Today I Will Remember
I am becoming whole.
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One More Day
Pain is part of being alive, and we need to learn that. Pain does not last forever, nor is it necessarily unbearable, and we need to be taught that.
– Harold Kushner
Losing anything — a loved one, a favorite book, even a set of goals we thought were reachable — can hurt deeply. But the loss of good health is one of the greatest pains we can suffer, for it signifies the ending of what is familiar and what is expected. The pain of a long-term medical condition isn’t just physical, it’s also emotional. We are afraid that we will not be able to live through the change.
With time, however, we adjust to this latest loss, just as we have adjusted the others. We create new routines that allow for diminished health. As laughter filters through our days once again, we understand that even despair is not permanent.
I reach outward, extending my arms for hope. I turn inward with the thought of helping myself. I am getting stronger.
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Food For Thought
Safety
I am safe as long as I do not take the first compulsive bite. Abstinence is my security. If I break my abstinence, I lose my protection against the confusion, remorse, and pain of overeating.
To keep my abstinence strong, I need to use the OA tools of recovery each day. I need to build my program and to give it my best efforts. Remembering that my Higher Power has given me a new life, I will not endanger it by forgetting how much I need His care.
Temptation is always appearing in one form or another. Sometimes it may seem impossible not to give in. My strength lies not in myself but in God, and only by maintaining close contact with Him can I remain safe.
My Higher Power has led me to OA and has given me a safe place to be. When I am tempted or upset, I will use the telephone, go to a meeting, practice Step Eleven, and do whatever else it takes to maintain my abstinence.
Thank You for bringing me to a safe place.
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One Day At A Time
STEP ELEVEN
"Be like the bird that, passing on her flight
awhile on boughs too slight,
feels them give way beneath her,
and yet sings, knowing that she hath wings. "
Victor Hugo
Step eleven tells us to seek “through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” For me, that is a daily, some times, minute by minute task. As a food addict and compulsive overeater I face temptation daily and need to be in fit spiritual condition to resist. I do this by making a daily conscious contact with the God of my understanding. Then I am connected when I need the fox hole prayers like, “Help me!” or “I’m in trouble!”
Step eleven for me is a spiritual discipline to be practiced daily. I do not do that perfectly, but I aspire to connect daily with my God. As I connect I pray for His will for my life and the power to carry that out. It is easy to get selfish with my prayers and step eleven helps me with this. There are certain things that I know are His will, such as attending meetings, talking to my sponsor, using the tools and staying connected to my God. If I am unsure, I pray for God’s will and leave the rest to Him.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will maintain a fit spiritual condition by connecting with the God of my understanding.
~ Carolyn
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
It did not satisfy us to be told that we could not control our drinking just because we were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These things were true to some extent, in fact, to a considerable extent with some of us. But we are sure that our bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any picture of the alcoholic which leaves out his physical factor is incomplete. - Pg. xxvi - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Often times we have fears that someone from the past might find us, evil is after us, or that our friends really hate us. At these times we must turn to our Higher Power, surrender our fears and our fate. In that surrender, we cease struggling, cease fear.
The Divine helps me ask for help when I need it.
Giving
Today I give with both hands. Giving for its own sake is the spiritual way and actually releases the gift. When I givewith one hand and take with the other, I give only half of what I haveand receive only half of what might be given to me. I limit myself intwo ways. Somehow the universe responds to clear intention. When I fully release a gift, it goes to where it is supposed to go and what returns to me comes when and how it is right.
I am able to give with both hands
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Our recovery has less to do with our thinking and much more to do with our actions. If you don't believe this, stop going to meetings, stop looking at where you're wrong, stop making amends, and stop doing service work. You will soon see that no matter how good your 'thoughts' are, your life won't be worth a hoot in very short order.
My recovery works better when I utilize, not analyze.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If something is right, it can be done. If it is wrong it can be done without.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I look beyond the immediate moment of satisfaction and decide what is good for me in the larger picture of my life. Today I have faith and patience and can wait to make loving and positive choices.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I didn't know who I was. I would be the type of person you wanted me to be at that particular time. A few minutes later I'd be the type of person someone else wanted me to be. I had so many personalities I could have gone into group therapy on my own. - Anon.
bluidkiti
05-08-2021, 11:17 AM
May 19
Daily Reflections
GIVING WITHOUT STRINGS
And he well knows that his own life has been made richer, as an extra
dividend of giving to another without any demand for a return.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 69
The concept of giving without strings was hard to understand when I
first came into the program. I was suspicious when others wanted to
help me. I thought, "What do they want in return?" But I soon
learned the joy of helping another alcoholic and I understood why they
were there for me in the beginning. My attitudes changed and I
wanted to help others. Sometimes I became anxious, as I wanted them
to know the joys of sobriety, that life can be beautiful. When my life
is full of a loving God of my understanding and I give that love to my
fellow alcoholic, I feel a special richness that is hard to explain.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
Fellowship is a big part of staying sober. The doctors call it group
therapy. We never go to an A.A. meeting without taking something
out of it. Sometimes we don't feel like going to a meeting and we think
of excuses for not going. But we usually end up by going anyway and
we always get some lift out of every meeting. Meetings are part of
keeping sober. And we get more out of a meeting if we try to contribute
something to it. Am I contributing my share at meetings?
Meditation For The Day
"He brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set
my feet upon a rock and established my goings." The first part, "He
brought me up out of a horrible pit," means that by turning to God and
putting my problems in His hands, I am able to overcome my sins and
temptations. "He set my feet upon a rock" means that when I trust
God in all things, I have true security. "He established my goings"
means that if I honestly try to live the way God wants me to live, I will
have God's guidance in my daily living.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that my feet may be set upon a rock. I pray that I may rely on
God to guide my comings and goings.
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As Bill Sees It
Basis of All Humility, p. 139
For just so long as we were convinced that we could live exclusively
by our own individual strength and intelligence, for just that long was
a working faith in a Higher Power impossible.
This was true even when we believed that God existed. We could
actually have earnest religious beliefs which remained barren
because we were still trying to play God ourselves. As long as we
placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power
was out of the question.
That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God's
will, was missing.
12 & 12, p. 72
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Walk in Dry Places
Principles are Enduring
Problem Solving
We often emphasize -Principles before personalities-- in Twelve Step programs, sometimes without fully understanding what's involved. The real message of this slogan is that we should treat people equally while following certain guidelines in our own actions.
While we are influenced by strong personalities, we cannot rely on them for complete guidance and direction. People can betray us or simply fail us through no fault of their own. Principles, on the other hand, are enduring and will be with us long after personal relationships wither away.
One unfailing principle for living is to live each day remembering that God is guiding and directing all actions and outcomes. While we will be grateful for the assistance and cooperation of others, we will not hold them responsible for our success or failures.
I'll live today with the belief that God's good plan is working in all people's lives. I will not expect too much or too little of others, but rather will deal with them fairly and decently.
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Keep It Simple
The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing.---Marcus Aurelius
The struggles of life teach us a lot. They challenge our beliefs. As we struggle, we come to believe that our friends, family, and Higher Power will be there for us in hard times. But we must do our part. We need to call and honestly let people know how we are doing. We need to pray and ask our Higher Power for help. If we do these things, we'll come to respect and learn from hard times.
Prayer for the Day: I pray for the wisdom to see that struggles are part of live. Higher Power, I pray for Your help in not taking struggles too personally.
Action for the Day: I'll list four times I've struggled and what I learned from each stuggle. I'll share this with a friend.
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Each Day a New Beginning
. . . if we are suffering illness, poverty, or misfortune, we think we shall be satisfied on the day it ceases. But there too, we know it is false, so soon as one has got used to not suffering, one wants something else. --Simone Weil
Perhaps it's the human condition never to be satisfied and yet always to think, "If only . . ." However, the more we look within for wholeness, the greater will be our acceptance of all things, at all times.
So frequently we hear that happiness is within. But what does that mean when we may have just lost the job that supported us and our children? Or when the car won't start and funds are low? Or when we are feeling really scared and don't know whom to talk to or where to go? "Happiness is within" is such a grand platitude at those times.
Nevertheless, our security in any situation is within, if we but know how to tap it. It is within because that is where the strength we are blessed with resides, the strength given us from the power greater than ourselves. "Going within" takes, first, a decision. Next, it takes stillness, and then, patience. But peace will come.
We will quit wanting when we have learned how to turn to our inner strength. We will find serenity rather than suffering.
I will go within whenever I feel the rumblings of dissatisfaction today. I will look there for my joy and sense of well-being and know that divine order is in charge.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Our homes have been battle-grounds many an evening. In the morning we have kissed and made up. Our friends have counseled chucking the men and we have done so with finality, only to be back in a little while hoping, always hoping. Our men have sworn great solemn oaths that they were through drinking forever. We have believed them when no one else could or would. Then, in days, weeks, or months, a fresh outburst.
p. 105
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
For about one year prior to this time, there was one doctor who had continued to struggle with me. He had tried everything from having me attend daily mass at six a.m. to performing the most menial labor for his charity patients. Why he bothered with me as long as he did I shall never know, for he knew there was no answer for me in medicine, and he, like all doctors of his day, had been taught that the alcoholic was incurable and should be ignored. Doctors were advised to attend patients who could be benefited by medicine. With the alcoholic, they could only give temporary relief and in the last stages not even that. It was a waste of the doctor's time and the patients' money. Nevertheless, there were a few doctors who saw alcoholism as a disease and felt that the alcoholic was a victim of something over which he had no control. They had a hunch that there must be an answer for these apparently hopeless ones, somewhere. Fortunately for me, my doctor was one of the enlightened.
pp. 270-271
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."
Thus it was that under Tradition Four an A.A. group had exercised its right to be wrong. Moreover, it had performed a great service for Alcoholics Anonymous, because it had been humbly willing to apply the lessons it learned. It had picked itself up with a laugh and gone on to better things. Even the chief architect, standing in the ruins of his dream, could laugh at himself - and that is the very acme of humility.
p. 149
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An old timer had shared in the meeting about praying for something,
and that God had answered her request. Someone asked her, "How
do you know it was God who granted your request?"
She replied..."I didn't ask anyone else."
--unknown
"When someone does something well, applaud! You will make two
people happy."
--Samuel Goldwyn
"Take time for solitude. How else can you contemplate the blessings
of recovery."
--Abby Warman
Be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Talk health,
happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet. Make all your
friends feel there is something special in them. Look at the sunny side
of everything. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and
expect only the best. Be as enthusiastic about the success of others as
you are about your own. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on
to the greater achievements of the future. Give everyone a smile.
Spend so much time improving yourself that you have no time left to
criticize others. Be too big for worry and too noble for anger.
--Christian D. Larsen
Try to enjoy everything you do, Life is too short not to.
--unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MONEY
"Money is the symbol of duty. It
is the sacrament of having done
for mankind that which mankind
wanted."
--Samuel Butler
St. Paul said, "The laborer is worthy of his hire." In one sense money -
how people pay us for the services we have performed - is symbolic of
our value in the community. Of course, this is not always true and
people can make money by dishonest and destructive methods.
However, in our society money is also a force behind much creativity
and job satisfaction. The danger is to become a "snob". Thinking that
we are better than others because we earn more money.
Spirituality is about discovering the "oneness" of mankind and
incorporating our creative "difference" - we can all learn from each
other. Pretentiousness is indicative of insecurities that need to be
dealt within our recovery program.
O Lord, let my gratitude be seen in my relationship with others.
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"To you, O Lord, I called; to the Lord I cried for mercy: 'What gain is
there in my destruction, in my going down to the pit? Will the dust
praise you? Will it proclaim your faithfulness? Hear, O Lord, and be
merciful to me; O Lord, be my help.' You turned my wailing into
dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my
heart may sing to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give
you thanks forever."
Psalm 30:8-12
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Daily Inspiration
It is far better to feel fulfilled than to feel important because you have taken on too much. Lord, help me eliminate the unnecessary demands in my life which only cause stress.
We are powerless to change our past, but we can change how we look at it. Lord, help me to realize that my past has made me a stronger person and show me that these experiences have taught me valuable life lessons.
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NA Just For Today
A Growth Inventory
"We review our past performance and our present behavior to see what we want to keep and what we want to discard."
Basic Text, p. 29
As each day winds to a close, many of us reflect on the past twenty-four hours and consider how we can live differently in the future. It's easy for our thoughts to remain trapped in the mundane: change the oil in the car, keep the living room clean, or empty the litter box. Sometimes it takes a special effort to jog our thinking out of the daily rut and onto a higher track.
One simple question can put us on the high road: What do we think our Higher Power wants for us tomorrow? Maybe we need to improve our flagging conscious contact with the God of our understanding. Perhaps we've been uncomfortable in our job or our relationship, holding on only out of fear. We might be hiding some troubling defect of character, afraid to share it with our sponsor. The question is, in what parts of our lives do we really want to grow?
As each day ends, we find it beneficial to take some moments to spend time with our Higher Power. We can begin to reflect on what will benefit our program of spiritual growth most in the coming day. We think about the areas in which we have grown recently, and target areas that still require work. What more fitting way to end the day?
Just for today: I will set aside some time at the end of the day to commune with my Higher Power. I will review the past day, meditating on what stands between me and my Higher Power's will for my life.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
As we learn we always change, and so our perception. This changed perception then becomes a new Teacher inside each of us. --Hyemeyohsts Storm
Hyemeyohsts Storm's book, Seven Arrows, tells the stories of one of the Indian tribes in this country before most of its members were killed. They believed that change was important for growth. Change is sometimes frightening. We usually prefer the familiar, no matter how uncomfortable, over taking a chance on the unknown.
When fear gets in the way of making healthy changes, we talk to fear, inviting it along with us on our course of action. Getting to know fear allows us to ask it for a gift: the courage to walk with fear by our side and learn from it as we go. It allows us to learn which fear is blocking our progress and which fear is healthy--cautioning us against actions that might be harmful.
What fear might I make a friend of today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The world is full of people looking for spectacular happiness while they snub contentment. --Doug Larson
We are men on a quest. We seek the serenity of being friendly toward the world and toward ourselves. The spiritual practices we follow are personal and quiet, not spectacular or dazzling. We have been part of the throng seeking stimulating highs. Some of us know the excitement and escape of saving others from their own troubles or drowning ourselves in activity and work. We may know the mellowness of a drug or food binge. Perhaps we know the heart-pounding intensity of shoplifting, gambling, or sexual pursuit.
The way of life suggested by this simple program changes us deeply if we fully surrender to it. This spiritual quest changes us slowly over time, and our reward is contentment. It produces a joy, a feeling of well-being, which is far richer than the momentary pleasures we sought in the past.
Today, I am grateful for a way of life which leads me toward a contentment I can rely on.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . if we are suffering illness, poverty, or misfortune, we think we shall be satisfied on the day it ceases. But there too, we know it is false, so soon as one has got used to not suffering, one wants something else. --Simone Weil
Perhaps it's the human condition never to be satisfied and yet always to think, "If only . . ." However, the more we look within for wholeness, the greater will be our acceptance of all things, at all times.
So frequently we hear that happiness is within. But what does that mean when we may have just lost the job that supported us and our children? Or when the car won't start and funds are low? Or when we are feeling really scared and don't know whom to talk to or where to go? "Happiness is within" is such a grand platitude at those times.
Nevertheless, our security in any situation is within, if we but know how to tap it. It is within because that is where the strength we are blessed with resides, the strength given us from the power greater than ourselves. "Going within" takes, first, a decision. Next, it takes stillness, and then, patience. But peace will come.
We will quit wanting when we have learned how to turn to our inner strength. We will find serenity rather than suffering.
I will go within whenever I feel the rumblings of dissatisfaction today. I will look there for my joy and sense of well-being and know that divine order is in charge.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Solving Problems
Shame is the first feeling that strikes me whenever I, or someone I love, has a problem, said one recovering woman.
Many of us were raised with the belief that having a problem is something to be ashamed of.
This belief can do many damaging things to us. It can stop us from identifying our problems; it can make us feel alienated and inferior when we have, or someone we love has, a problem. Shame can block us from solving a problem and finding the gift from the problem.
Problems are a part of life. So are solutions. People have problems, but we, and our self-esteem, are separate from our problems.
I've yet to meet a person who didn't have problems to solve, but I've met many who felt shamed to talk about the problems they actually had solved!
We are more than our problems. Even if our problem is our own behavior, the problem is not who we are it's what we did.
Its okay to have problems. Its okay to talk about problems at appropriate times, and with safe people. Its okay to solve problems.
And were okay, even when we have, or someone we love, has a problem. We don't have to forfeit our personal power or our self-esteem. We have solved exactly the problems we've needed to solve to become who we are.
Today, I will let go of my shame about problems.
I love the person that I am becoming. --Diane Crosby written by ~ Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Don’t Be Afraid of Making Mistakes
Don’t be afraid of making a mistake. That energy can create more mistakes. It can stop us from enjoying what we’re doing. It can block us from creating freely and making something beautiful.
Sometimes it’s necessary and important to make mistakes, to fumble around and do something poorly so we can learn to do it better next time. No matter what we’re doing or what we’re learning, we have to start somewhere. Look back at the past. We learned by trying, stumbling, falling, getting back up, and trying again. But we wouldn’t be where we’re at if we hadn’t begun where we were.
Jump in, begin, and do the task as best you can. Stop worrying about mistakes, and let yourself do it as well as you can right now. If you do it wrong or poorly, you can do it over again. And when you do it in an attitude of love, you won’t fail. You’ll learn something new about yourself, life, and the task.
Love yourself enough to try. Let yourself make mistakes. Tell yourself you don’t have to do it perfectly. Let yourself have fun while you’re learning. Start where you are, and do what you can. Learning and getting better will happen from there.
You may not always know the best way in the beginning, but if you keep trying, you’ll quickly learn to tell when you’re on track.
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More language of letting go
Tell yourself how long you’ll wait
Use deadlines as a tool.
Sometimes, we find ourselves in an uncomfortable situation. We don’t know what to do next. We don’t know how to solve the problem. We don’t know the course that’s going to unfold. Maybe we’re seeing someone, and the relationship isn’t gaining momentum, but it’s not time to push the issue. Maybe all we need to do is give the other person a little space and time to work through his or her stuff. Maybe the business that we’re pursuing isn’t gaining any momentum, but things may change course. Part of us, the obsessive part, says, “I need to know right now.” But the other part of us, the serene, wise part, says, “Relax. It’s not time. You don’t have all the information yet.”
Create a deadline, a private one, with yourself. Tell yourself you’ll give it six weeks or three months or maybe a year to change course. Then you’ll evaluate the data and make a decision about what to do next.
Sometiimes, setting a deadline is all we need to do to help ourselves relax. We know we’re not trapped. We’re not being a victim. We’re making a conscious decision to let go and let things unfold.
God, grant me the serenity to not try to force outcomes and solutions too soon.
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Special Messengers
Reconnecting with Friends
Every person that passes through our lives makes a contribution to our life stories. There are those who play large roles and make deep impressions, but sometimes a brief special appearance before life takes them in another direction creates a meaningful connection. It is a rare gift when they suddenly reappear in our lives after a long absence.
Though the world may seem full of more people than we could ever know, we are often drawn to people with similar energy, which brings us together time and time again. On first meeting, the characters in our life stories may seem familiar. We may know each other from past lives or perhaps we merely recognize the energy of a kindred spirit. But when fate brings old friends back into our lives, there is always a reason. They may act as messengers, reminding us of a part of ourselves we have forgotten to nurture. They might appear to give us a chance to react in a new way to an old situation. They may even bring up unresolved issues so that we may complete them, giving us the chance to move forward on our life path. Whether old friends, previous romances, or once and future partners, their reappearance is more than mere chance. They may never know what they bring into our lives, but the renewed contact is a gift.
If this hasn’t happened to you, maybe you are meant to initiate contact by seeking out old friends. If old friends come to mind or into your dreams, use their appearance as an excuse to get in touch. If an old song or movie reminds you of them, reach out to share the gift of renewed contact. Wherever you fall in the circle of connection and reconnection, be sure to look beyond the surprise of the moment to enjoy the deeper gift that this revelation brings. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“When I was driven to my knees by alcohol, I was made ready to ask for the gift of faith,” wrote AA co-founder Bill W. “And all was changed. Never again, my pains and problems notwithstanding, would I experience my former desolation. I saw the universe to be lighted by God’s love; I was alone no more.” Am I convinced that my new life is real and that it will last so long as I continue doing what The Program and Twelve Steps suggest that I do?
Today I Pray
May God be the ever-present third party in my relationships with others, whether they are casual or involve a deep emotional commitment. May I be aware that if there is real friendship or love between human beings, God’s spirit is always present. May I feel His spirit in all my human relationships.
Today I Will Remember
God is The Divine Third.
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One More Day
The thought of suicide is a great consolation: by means of it one gets successfully through many a bad night.
– Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
Many of us pretend that the thought of suicide has never crossed our minds, but our thoughts may occasionally become morbid — and we may be frightened.
These thoughts may seem harmful, but they may actually be helpful. Thoughts of suicide can force us to recognize how much we value living.
As we contemplate the moment at which our life would end, we struggle and notice our desire for life, although we may no understand why we have this desire. What’s important is that we gave ourselves the choice of death and did not choose it. As we feel the joy of that decision we can think more of ourselves and of our worth. We really do want to live and are strong enough to know that suicide is not an acceptable solution to our problems
I feel joy from knowing I can choose life.
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Food For Thought
Resentments
When we hang on to resentments, we poison ourselves. As compulsive overeaters, we cannot afford resentment, since it exacerbates our disease. If we do not get rid of our anger and bitterness, we will suffer more than anyone. Seeking revenge will harm ourselves in the long run.
Many of us have carried around old grudges, which caused us to reach for food when we thought about them. We don't need the food and we don't need the grudges, either. When we give away the resentments, we are that much lighter in body and in spirit. Now that we have found OA, we have a way to get rid of the animosity and indignation, which has been poisoning our system.
Taking inventory and making amends is an essential part of burying resentments. We need to first be consciously aware of them before we can give them away. These steps usually need to be taken again and again as negative material threatens our physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
Take away my resentments, Lord.
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One Day At A Time
~ DENIAL ~
The ability to delude yourself
may be an important survival tool.
Jane Wagner
I had many delusions when I entered the Twelve Step program. One by one they have shattered, but only when I was able to handle the truth.
Still, I have looked back at the things I was in denial about during my sickness, and I blamed myself for not seeing the truth sooner, for not seeking recovery sooner. On the good days, which are becoming more and more common for me, I see that my denial was indeed a survival tool.
I spent 33 years with eating disorders without ever consciously knowing about them. Subconsciously, I was very interested in books and movies about anorexia and bulimia, and was fascinated to learn about compulsive overeating. I can only believe I was unknowingly preparing myself for the day when I would be able to face my addiction and still survive.
One day at a time...
I will remind myself that many things are in our lives for a reason, even denial.
~ Rhonda H. ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
THE FACT IS THAT MOST ALCOHOLICS, FOR REASONS YET OBSCURE, HAVE LOST THE POWER OF CHOICE IN DRINK. OUR SO-CALLED WILL POWER BECOMES PRACTICALLY NONEXISTENT. WE ARE UNABLE, AT CERTAIN TIMES, TO BRING INTO OUR CONSCIOUSNESS WITH SUFFICIENT FORCE THE MEMORY OF THE SUFFERING AND HUMILIATION OF EVEN A WEEK OR A MONTH AGO. WE ARE WITHOUT DEFENSE AGAINST THE FIRST DRINK. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
To want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort is not bad, it is a perfectly normal state of being for an addict. But each hour we stay clean eventually makes a day. Each day brings us closer to health of body, mind, and spirit. Eventually 'craving' our chemicals will not be normal, but a thing of our diseased past.
Let me know that the state of craving my drug of choice will one day be replaced with feeling my true emotions.
My Reservoir of Peace
There is nothing in my day that is more important than my serenity. It is my responsibility to maintain and attend to it. Whatever I do in the world, my serenity comes first. I owe it to no one. I will pay attention today to the myriad of ways in which I am thrown off balance and I will take a moment to center myself, to breathe, to remember that when I can calm my body, mind and spirit, I interact differently the people, places and things of my day. I will work daily to build my serenity muscles so that I stay strong and flexible. Serenity isn't something that I can just grab and have. I need to nourish it through quiet and reflection and come back to it what I lose it. My serenity is mine to look after. I give myself the gift of my own serenity today and every day.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
The next time a newcomer tells you, 'The program isn't working for me,' agree with them. They are right. Then explain to them that the only people who stay clean and sober are the ones who work the program, not the ones who wait for the program to work for them.
I must do the work or it doesn't get done.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
If you suffer from low self-esteem, do estimable things.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I love the person that I am becoming. - Diane Crosby
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I don't think it's a coincidence that the word 'spirit' means God and it means alcohol. - Cubby S.
bluidkiti
05-12-2021, 12:23 PM
May 20
Daily Reflections
ONE DAY AT A TIME
Above all, take it one day at a time.
AS BILL SEES IT, p.11
Why do I kid myself that I must stay away from a drink for only one day,
when I know perfectly well I must never drink again as long as I live? I
am not kidding myself because one day at a time is probably the only
way I can reach the long-range objective of staying sober.
If I determine that I shall never drink again as long as I live, I set myself
up. How can I be sure I won't drink when I have no idea what the future
may hold?
On a day-at-a-time basis, I am confident I can stay away from a drink
for one day. So I set out with confidence. At the end of the day, I have
the reward of achievement. Achievement feels good and that makes me
want more!
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
If we get up in a meeting and tell something about ourselves in order to
help the other person, we feel a whole lot better. It's the old law of the
more you give the more you get. Witnessing and confession are part of
keeping sober. You never know when you may help somebody. Helping
others is one of the best ways to stay sober yourself. And the
satisfaction you get out of helping a fellow human being is one of the
finest experiences you can have. Am I helping others?
Meditation For The Day
Without God, no real victory is ever won. All the military victories of
great conquerors have passed into history. The world might be better off
without military conquerors. The real victories are won in the
spiritual realm. "He that conquers himself is greater than he who
conquers a city." The real victories are victories over sin and
temptation, leading to a victorious and abundant life. Therefore,
keep a brave and trusting heart. Face all your difficulties in the spirit of
conquest. Remember that where God is, there is the true victory.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that the forces of evil in my life will flee before God's presence. I
pray that with God I will win the real victory over myself.
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As Bill Sees It
Defects and Repairs, p. 140
More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very
much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character.
This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a
certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn't deserve it.
<< << << >> >> >>
Guilt is really the reverse side of the coin of pride. Guilt aims at
self-destruction, and pride aims at the destruction of others.
<< << << >> >> >>
"The moral inventory is a cool examination of the damages that
occurred to us during life and a sincere effort to look at them in a
true perspective. This has the effect of taking the ground glass out of
us, the emotional substance that still cuts and inhibits."
1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 73
2. Grapevine, June 1961
3. Letter, 1957
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Walk in Dry Places
Gratitude is not natural.
Gratitude
"Nobody ever gave me a helping hand," a young alcoholic complained, having handed in prison. "My life has been one bad break after another."
While this person indeed had bad breaks, it's doubtful that he'd never been given a helping hand by somebody. If we have no gratitude, it's likely taht we don't ever recognize a helping hand when it is extended. We may have believed any assistance we took was our right, even resenting our benefactors.
The remedy for such immature thinking is a conscious effort to vultivate gratitude. IF we're not aware of feeling it, we can at least act as if we have it. Thank people for any favor, no matter how small. Express appreciation for the wonderful people around you. Give people praise at every opportunity.
This will help start a current of gratitude that can be amplified in time. You'll come to recognize many helping hands.
Today I'll be grateful and appreciative of everything in my life. I'll let gratitude build up in my life until I can feel it and others can sense that I have it.
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Keep It Simple
And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch. ---Matt. 15:14
The Twelve Step programs are sometime called self-help programs. But they're not really, because we all help each other. We don't stay sober by ourselves. Sometimes we call Twelve Step programs peer programs. And they are. All of us equal. No one is an expert. But we need to be careful who we choose for a sponsor. We each need to find someone who has been sober longer than us. Someone who understands the Steps. Someone who lives by them. Some we want to be like. We need to stick with the winners.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I know I'm like a blind person who is just beginning to see. Help me follow the path of those who see better than I do.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list the people in my program I go to for help. Am I sticking with the winners?
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Each Day a New Beginning
It only takes one person to change your life--you. --Ruth Casey
Change is not easy, but it's absolutely unavoidable. Doors will close. Barriers will surface. Frustrations will mount. Nothing stays the same forever, and it's such folly to wish otherwise. Growth accompanies positive change; determining to risk the outcome resulting from a changed behavior or attitude will enhance our self-perceptions. We will have moved forward; in every instance our lives will be influenced by making a change that only each of us can make.
We have all dreaded the changes we knew we had to make. Perhaps even now we fear some impending changes. Where might they take us? It's difficult accepting that the outcome is not ours to control. Only the effort is ours. The solace is that positive changes, which we know are right for us and other people in our lives, are never going to take us astray. In fact, they are necessary for the smooth path just beyond this stumbling block.
When we are troubled by circumstances in our lives, a change is called for, a change that we must initiate. When we reflect on our recent as well as distant past, we will remember that the changes we most dreaded again and again have positively influenced our lives in untold ways.
Change ushers in glad, not bad, tidings.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
We seldom had friends at our homes, never knowing how or when the men of the house would appear. We could make few social engagements. We came to live almost alone. When we were invited out, our husbands sneaked so many drinks that they spoiled the occasion. If, on the other hand, they took nothing, their self-pity made them killjoys.
p. 105
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
And then, in the spring of 1939, a very remarkable book was rolled off a New York press with the title Alcoholics Anonymous. However, due to financial difficulties, the whole printing was, for a while, held up and the book received no publicity nor, of course, was it available in the stores, even if one knew it existed. But somehow my good doctor heard of this book, and he also learned a little about the people responsible for its publication. He sent to New York for a copy, and after reading it, he tucked it under his arm and called on me. That call marked the turning point in my life.
p. 271
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"Shoemaker, stick to thy last!" ... better do one thing supremely well than many badly. That is the central theme of this Tradition. Around it our Society gathers in unity. The very life of our Fellowship requires the preservation of this principle.
p. 150
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Thoughts have power. Thoughts are energy. You can make your world
or break it by your thinking.
--Susan Taylor
When life seems to be going in a direction you don't want, take a
moment and recognize all the wonderful gifts in your life. This really
helps you change your perspective and appreciate things once again.
--unknown
"Find places of healing. Discover people, things and places that
nourish your soul, bring you back to center, help you heal."
--Melody Beattie
What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can
be.
--Ellen Burstyn
Lord, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today
that You and I together can't handle.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
RELIGION
"You have not converted a man
because you have silenced him."
--Viscount John Morley
I need to remember that you cannot force a person into faith. You
cannot make a person believe. You cannot bribe a person into prayer.
So much of my early religion was "a deal": you do this and you will get
this. If you do this for God and His church you will be happy and
successful. There always seemed to be a "payoff" with God, or that was
how it seemed.
I think many of the silent majority sense the same kind of thing; God has
got lost in "the business" of religion. Spirituality accepts the pain,
confusion and anger of this silent majority and says, "find a God as you
understand Him." Discover your power in your life - and then God will
be perceived.
Lord, in my silence is the "shout" heard.
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The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down
in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though
I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for
you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare
a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head
with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all
the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
Psalms 23
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Daily Inspiration
You can keep things in perspective by realizing that not much in life is as urgent as others would like you to believe. Lord, help me to know and stay focused on that which is really important to me.
Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me.
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NA Just For Today
Coming Out Of Isolation
"We find ourselves doing and enjoying things that we never thought we would be doing."
Basic Text, p. 98
Active addiction kept us isolated for many reasons. In the beginning, we avoided family and friends so they wouldn't find out we were using. Some of us avoided all nonaddicts, fearing moral backlash and legal repercussions. We belittled people who had "normal" lives with families and hobbies; we called them "uncool" believing we could never enjoy the simple pleasures of life. Eventually, we even avoided other addicts because we didn't want to share our drugs. Our lives narrowed, and our concerns were confined to the daily maintenance of our disease.
Today, our lives are much fuller. We enjoy activities with other recovering addicts. We have time for our families. And we've discovered many other pursuits that give us pleasure. What a change from the past! We can live life just as fully as the "normal" people we once scorned. Enjoyment has returned to our lives, a gift of recovery.
Just for today: I can find pleasure in the simple routines of daily living.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
For nothing can be sole or whole that has not been rent. --W. B. Yeats
The maple out front is young and healthy, but it grows in the shape of a Y. Neighborhood tree experts have warned that as it grows, it will split in half as the weight of the two main branches pull down against each other. One of these two beautiful branches, already lush with new leaves, must be cut. But once pruned, the remaining branch will straighten as it reaches for the sun. It will grow faster, and the whole tree will live many years longer--all by cutting it back today.
Sometimes we are like this tree. We go in too many directions, and can't seem to do any one thing well. When this happens, we need to give something up, to choose which direction we want and stick with it. The results will be well worth the price.
What is holding me back from growth?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Truth is a demure lady, much too ladylike to knock you on the head and drag you to her cave. She is there, but the people must want her and seek her out. --William F.Buckley, Jr.
As we develop a deeper and more reliable friendship with ourselves, we have little hunches or inner blips of feeling that tell us private truths. Ancient scriptures called it "a still, small voice." We usually sense this inner message somewhere in our body. Some men say it's in the heart, others say in the gut, or ear, or on their shoulders. When we are too focused on what others think and feel and what the world says is truth, we don't notice our inner voice; it doesn't get much chance to develop. It never hits us over the head; it requires silence and respect to be heard.
As we follow the Steps, we learn to regularly visit the cave of this demure lady, Truth, and seek out her wisdom. The more we listen and the more we respect the truths we receive in our quietness, the more wisdom we are given.
I will listen to the personal wisdom whispered by that still, small voice within.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It only takes one person to change your life--you. --Ruth Casey
Change is not easy, but it's absolutely unavoidable. Doors will close. Barriers will surface. Frustrations will mount. Nothing stays the same forever, and it's such folly to wish otherwise. Growth accompanies positive change; determining to risk the outcome resulting from a changed behavior or attitude will enhance our self-perceptions. We will have moved forward; in every instance our lives will be influenced by making a change that only each of us can make.
We have all dreaded the changes we knew we had to make. Perhaps even now we fear some impending changes. Where might they take us? It's difficult accepting that the outcome is not ours to control. Only the effort is ours. The solace is that positive changes, which we know are right for us and other people in our lives, are never going to take us astray. In fact, they are necessary for the smooth path just beyond this stumbling block.
When we are troubled by circumstances in our lives, a change is called for, a change that we must initiate. When we reflect on our recent as well as distant past, we will remember that the changes we most dreaded again and again have positively influenced our lives in untold ways.
Change ushers in glad, not bad, tidings.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Sadness
Ultimately, to grieve our losses means to surrender to our feelings.
So many of us have lost so much, have said so many good byes; have been through so many changes. We may want to hold back the tides of change, not because the change isn't good, but because we have had so much change, so much loss.
Sometimes, when we are in the midst of pain and grief, we become shortsighted, like members of a tribe described in the movie Out of Africa.
If you put them in prison, one character said, describing this tribe, they die.
Why? asked another character.
Because they cant grasp the idea that they'll be let out one day. They think its permanent, so they die.
Many of us have so much grief to get through. Sometimes we begin to believe grief, or pain, is a permanent condition.
The pain will stop. Once felt and released, our feelings will bring us to a better place than where we started. Feeling our feelings, instead of denying or minimizing them, is how we heal from our past and move forward into a better future. Feeling our feelings is how we let go.
It may hurt for a moment, but peace and acceptance are on the other side. So is a new beginning.
God, help me fully embrace and finish my endings, so I may be ready for my new beginnings.
Today I will look at all my fears in a new light. I can now see them as a result of my thinking and will turn over all my fear thoughts to my Higher Power. Fear no longer owns me or is a threat to my day. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Value the Fragrances of the Universe
I stopped at the small gas station to fill the tank and get a cup of coffee en route through northern California. “Did you know that the world’s largest manufacturer of aromatherapy products is right here in town? asked the attendant. His remark reminded me of the power of our sense of smell to affect how we feel. We are surrounded by odors, but unless one is particularly noxious, we tend to ignore the effects of the scents we are inhaling. And we tend to underestimate the power of certain scents to help us heal.
Nurture your sense of smell. Let it come alive. Use its power to help you heal. A bundle of white sage burning in a sea shell on the table. The wisp of cedar smoke from the fireplace. A cone of incense filling the air. Lavender oil in the bath. Drops of eucalyptus sprinkled in the shower, its penetrating aroma mingling with the steam. A vanilla candle on the nightstand next to your bed. The smell of a forest, fresh with rain. Ocean air, salty and damp. The rich sawdust smell of redwood. Comforting smells from childhood– bread baking in the oven, freshly baked chocolate cake on the counter, chicken frying in the pan. The smell of our favorite people, their hair, their clothes, their cologne.
Value your sense of smell, the way it connects you to yourself, to memory, to emotion, to the universe and the world around you. Use your sense of smell to help you discover what’s right for you. Surround yourself with the fragrances of the universe. Let them help you heal.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to get something done
Yesterday we talked about using deadlines to help ourselves let go. Self-imposed deadlines can also be a way to focus our energy on a task at hand, especially one we’ve been putting off.
“I’m going to get up and have the house cleaned by 10:00 A.M.” “I’m going to lock myself in the house and have this report written in two days.” “I’m going to get the yard cleaned up by the end of the week.”
There are many times in life when it’s appropriate and healthy to listen to our internal clock about what to do and when to do it. Going with the flow can be a spiritual process, but there are other times when it’s helpful to use self-imposed deadlines to help us get the job done.
Do you need to set a deadline for yourself?
God, help me set appropriate deadlines for myself.
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Intelligence Speaks for Itself
The Fear of Appearing Dumb by Madisyn Taylor
In trying to project an image of intelligence, you deny others the opportunity to know the terrific individual you are.
The universal need to be accepted by others can be a barrier that prevents us from being ourselves around them. When we fear that the people we encounter will perceive us as inept or unintelligent, we frequently try to flaunt our grasp of large words or clever witticisms or our professional expertise in an effort to convince them that we are smart and capable. The reasons for feeling this way can be many, and they can often stem from as far back as your childhood. Many women in particular have the fear that they may appear not smart. Yet overcompensating for this fear can have the opposite effect if others are driven away by what they see as an immodest attitude or sense that you are urgently trying to prove yourself. The simple desire to be judged smart by both new and old acquaintances can cause you to reject your true self and adopt an affected persona. But in trying so persistently to project an image of supreme intelligence or capability, you deny others the opportunity! to become acquainted with the real and terrific individual you truly are.
The fear that others will perceive you as unintelligent can further influence your behavior, causing you to consciously avoid speaking your mind or asking questions. You may feel uncomfortable participating in activities if there is a chance that you won’t excel or taking part in discussions with others who may have more knowledge than you. In essence, you become ashamed of who you are and attempt to encase your identity in a veneer that others will find pleasing and impressive. It is, however, a common fear—one experienced by almost everyone at some point in their lives. The simplest way to combat it is to make a personal commitment to being yourself in your home, your workplace, and among strangers. Ask yourself how you believe the individuals you encounter will react should you speak awkwardly, need clarification, or fail to be the best at some activity. By being yourself, you will discover that all people make mistakes and ask questions and that others will like and resp! ect you because they recognize the goodness in your soul.
The fact that you are willing to be yourself, letting your many affirmative attributes express themselves naturally, will help you make a positive first impression on everyone you meet and earn the esteem of your family and friends. Your confidence and easygoing manner will say, - this is who I am and I am proud of the person I have become. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Alcoholism is called the “lonely disease”; almost without exception, alcoholics are literally tortured by loneliness. Even before the end of our drinking — before people began to shun us and we were “eighty-sixed” from bars, restaurants or people’s homes — nearly all of us felt that we didn’t quite belong. We were either shy, and dared not draw near otters, or we were noisy good fellows craving attention and approval, but rarely getting it. There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand. Finally, ever Bacchus betrayed us; we were struck down and left in terrified isolation. Have I begun to achieve an inner calm?
Today I Pray
May I know the tenderness of an intimate relationship with God and the calm I feel when I touch His spirit. May I translate this tenderness and calm to my relationships with others. May God deliver me from my lifelong feeling of loneliness and show me how to be a friend.
Today I Will Remember
God can teach me to be a friend.
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One More Day
Stripped of all their masquerades, the fears of men are quite identical: the fear of loneliness, rejection, inferiority, unmanageable anger, illness and death.
– Joshua Loth Liebman
Sometimes we may try to hold ourselves apart from others, pretending our uniqueness makes us superior. Underneath all our bluff and bravado we recognize that our fears are shared by all people.
We fashion our lives to protect ourselves from hurt, from displeasing those we love, and from disappointing ourselves. Our best chance for success, despite some difficult burdens, is to develop a positive attitude, an open nature, and a willingness to risk. Doing this doesn’t necessarily protect us from all our fears, but it does create an honest bond with other people who also accept their human nature.
My fears don’t have to isolate me; in fact, they can be the means by which I reach out to others.
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Food For Thought
Goals
In the OA program, our ultimate goal is not to be able to follow perfectly some diet or other. It is not even to arrive at a certain number of pounds by a certain date. Our goal is nothing short of becoming a new person, the person God intends us to be. Now that is a goal worthy of a lifetime's work!
We begin with the desire to stop eating compulsively. For a while, that may be goal enough. Sooner or later, we discover that in order to stop eating compulsively we need to rely on a Power greater than ourselves, and in the process of developing a relationship with this Higher Power, our goals change.
As our spiritual awareness increases, new possibilities are opened to us. As we experience God's grace in our daily lives, we become less self-centered and more centered in Him. Little by little, our willfulness is absorbed by His will and we are more sensitive to His direction. Our mood changes from one of despair to one of hope, and we grow in willingness to follow wherever our Higher Power leads.
Lord, direct my goals.
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One Day At A Time
AVOIDANCE
” Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.."
Aldous Huxley
Step 1 has a basic principle behind it which is truth. For me that truth is, just as I use tools for recovery, there are tools that my willful mind uses to keep me rooted in my disease. One of the strongest is avoidance.
Recovery can bring up a lot of painful issues and have me recall situations in which I feel uncomfortable. Sometimes I find that these old feelings have a way of creeping into my psyche. Suddenly some old behavior comes rushing back and I find myself using avoidance as a means to protect myself. Other times, I find myself acting very willfully by deliberately putting things off like going to the gym even when I know that it is good for me, I enjoy myself and am always happy for having gone..
My avoidance can take the form of rebellion against a person, chore, or situation.
Recovery has taught me to face situations. Once the situation has been faced, I often feel a sense of immediate relief. I know that the deed is done, my fears whether they be realistic or not, usually fall away, and sometimes I even feel a little silly for having avoided the situation in the first place.
One day at a time...
I will fact the situations that I encounter today with action.
~ Marilyn S.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Rarely Have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. - Pg. 58 - How It Works
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Often we try to make our disease someone else's fault. 'It was my upbringing, it was my spouse, it was my job or lack thereof.' However, we know that circumstances are no more responsible for the brain chemistry malfunctioning in addiction than it is in the pancreas malfunctioning in diabetes.
For whatever biological reason I have this addiction, I need to stop blaming and start recovering.
Putting in the Elbow Grease
I will be willing to do the daily work that is required to have the life I want to have. A good life is brought forth through many doors. The door of visualization, the door or seeing and the door of work. As I progress along my path I will learn how to 'work smarter'. How to use my energies more efficiently and waste less time needlessly. I'll learn how to get out of my own way and let my energies flow more freely. I'll learn how to listen to others and make my own decisions, how to have boundaries that are porous and flexible rather than either rigid or weak. I will find my sense of self and be able to sustain it even in the presence of others. I'll develop strength, wisdom, patience and compassion. I will develop my own unique gifts and strengths.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
'If you are humble, nothing can touch you, neither praise nor disgrace, because you know who you are.' ~Mother Theresa
Humility is that virtue which reduces me to the proper size without degrading me, and increases me in statue without inflating me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Actions speak louder than bumper stickers.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will look at all my fears in a new light. I can now see them as a result of my thinking and will turn over all my fear thoughts to my Higher Power. Fear no longer owns me or is a threat to my day.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I hear women say they faked orgasms.
I faked whole relationships. - Bob.
bluidkiti
05-12-2021, 12:23 PM
May 21
Daily Reflections
A LIST OF BLESSINGS
One exercise that I practice is to try for a full inventory of my
blessings. . . .
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 37
What did I have to be grateful for? I shut myself up and started listing
the blessings for which I was in no way responsible, beginning with
having been born of sound mind and body. I went through
seventy-four years of living right up to the present moment. The list
ran to two pages, and took two hours to compile; I included health,
family, money, A.A.-- the whole gamut.
Every day in my prayers, I ask God to help me remember my list, and
to be grateful for it throughout the day. When I remember my
gratitude list, it's very hard to conclude that God is picking on me.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
One of the finest things about A.A. is the sharing. Sharing is a
wonderful thing because the more you share the more you have. in our
old drinking days, we didn't do much sharing. We used to keep things
to ourselves, partly because we were ashamed, but mostly because we
were selfish. And we were very lonely because we didn't share. When
we came into A.A., the first thing we found was sharing. We heard
other alcoholics frankly sharing their experiences with hospitals, jails,
and all the usual mess that goes with drinking. Am I sharing?
Meditation For The Day
Character is developed by the daily discipline of duties done. Be
obedient to the heavenly vision and take the straight way. Do not fall
into the error of calling "Lord, Lord," and doing not the things that
should be done. You need a life of prayer and meditation, but you must
still do your work in the busy ways of life. The busy person is wise to
rest and wait patiently for God's guidance. If you are obedient to the
heavenly vision, you can be at peace.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be obedient to the heavenly vision. I pray if I fall, I
will pick myself up and go on.
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As Bill Sees It
"Restore Us to Sanity", p. 141
Few indeed are the practicing alcoholics who have any idea how
irrational they are, or, seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it.
For example, some will be willing to term themselves "problem
drinkers," but cannot endure the suggestion that they are in fact
mentally ill.
They are abetted in this blindness by a world which does not
understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism.
"Sanity" is defined as "soundness of mind." Yet no alcoholic, soberly
analyzing his destructive behavior, whether the destruction fell on
the dining-room furniture or his own moral fiber, can claim
"soundness of mind" for himself.
12 & 12, pp. 32-33
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Walk in Dry Places
What is a disappointment?
Handling My Outlook
Try as we will for success and achievement, we still must face a number of disappointments in our lives. We may be disappointed by a sales presentation that failed, a repair project that became a nightmare, or a vacation plan that turned sour. How can we handle such disappointments in the spirit of the Twelve Step program?
We must remember not to be too hard on ourselves when disappointments occur. Disappoints are part of the human experience, not misfortunes that come only to certain individuals. If we've done our best in any situation, we are not responsible if it did not work out.
Even more important, we should use every disappointment as a learning experience. It's always possible that one disappointment will provide kernels of truth that will help us succeed in our next effort. Many people point to specific disappointments or setbacks as times when they are able to find new direction.
There are even times when disappointment in a lesser enterprise clears the way for success in a larger one. Whatever the outcome, no disappointment need be final---- nor should we take it as proof that we're somehow inadequate and unworthy.
I will be positive in my outlook, expecting every effort to be effective and successful. If disappointment comes, however, I will take it in stride, knowing that it's only a temporary detour in my successful life.
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Keep It Simple
Be not afraid of growing slowing, be afraid only of standing still. ---Chinese proverb
All of us are a little afraid of growth. We wonder how growth will change our lives. Who will we be? Will our friend still love us? Can't we grow up and get in over with? Why does it take so long?
All of us have a need to keep growing. There is no age when we're "all grown up" and all done learning. But we don't need to rush our growth. Like a child on a too-big bicycle, at times we'll find ourselves out of control. We'll tip over. We can grow at our own pace, but we must grow. We must make changes. Or else, like an athlete on a too-small bicycle, we won't get far. We'll tip over too!
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Each Day a New Beginning
Our friends were not unearthly beautiful, Nor spoke with tongues of gold; our lovers blundered now and again when we most sought perfection . . . --Adrienne Rich
So often our expectations exceed reality. We want more than we have; our homes, our loved ones, perhaps our jobs seem not to measure up. "If only"--we say to ourselves. The time has come to quit saying "if only" and be glad, instead, for what is.
We are recovering. We do have friends and family who care about us. We do have exactly what we need at this moment.
We each can make a contribution today for the good of someone else and thus for ourselves. And in the act of looking to this day--to giving something to another human being--we will sense the inner perfection we mistakenly long for in our outer selves.
I can look around me today and be thankful. I will tell someone close that I'm glad we share one another's world.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
There was never financial security. Positions were always in jeopardy or gone. An armored car could not have brought the pay envelopes home. The checking account melted like snow in June.
Sometimes there were other women. How heartbreaking was this discovery; how cruel to be told they understood our men as we did not!
pp. 105-106
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
Until now, I had never been told that I was an alcoholic. Few doctors will tell a hopeless patient that there is no answer for him or her. But this day my doctor gave it to me straight and said, "People like you are pretty well known to the medical profession. Every doctor gets his quota of alcoholic patients. Some of us struggle with these people because we know that they are very sick, but we also know that, short of some miracle, we are not going to be able to help them except temporarily and that they will inevitably get worse and worse until one of two things happens. Either they die of acute alcoholism or they develop wet brains and have to be put away permanently."
pp. 271-272
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
Alcoholics Anonymous can be likened to a group of physicians who might find a cure for cancer, and upon whose concerted work would depend the answer for sufferers of this disease. True, each physician in such a group might have his own specialty. Every doctor concerned would at times wish he could devote himself to his chosen field rather than work only with the group. But once these men had hit upon c cure, once it became apparent that only by their united effort could this be accomplished, then all of them would feel bound to devote themselves solely to the relief of cancer. In the radiance of such a miraculous discovery, any doctor would set his other ambitions aside, at whatever personal cost.
p. 150
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"If you do what you have always done, you'll get what you've always
gotten."
--Anon.
May today there be peace within.
May you trust your Highest Power that you are exactly where you are
meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love
that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the
freedom to sing, dance, and to bask in the sun.
--unknown
It comes down to a moment-to-moment choice to serve the highest
good. It is not enough to do it just once today and figure that is it.
Keep choosing the highest good.
--John Morton
"The love that is real is the love that lies at the heart of all
relationships. That is the love of God, and it doesn't change
with form or circumstance."
--Marianne Williamson
"One seeks God in books; one finds him in prayer."
--Padre Pio
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
ART
"Art flourishes where there is a
sense of adventure."
--A. N. Whitehead
Today I enjoy and am sustained by the adventure of life. The
adventure of living. The adventure of living my life. For years I spent
my time avoiding situations, avoiding people, avoiding me. Now in my
daily recovery I need to participate and experience my spiritual
energy. I want to meet new people. I want to travel. I want to work
productively and earn money. I want to add something to this beautiful
world.
I am discovering in my recovery that experiencing my creative
spirituality makes me an artist. God is found in the hugs I give and the
early morning "hellos" I shout to strangers. Today I am not afraid
anymore. Today I am alive.
God, may I seek and find You in the small and mundane things of life;
let me find You where I am.
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Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us
and His love is made complete in us. We know that we live in Him and
He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.
1 John 4:11-13
And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love.
Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
1 John 4:16
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Daily Inspiration
Strengthen your character by knowing which things in life are nonnegotiable to you. Lord, I pray for the strength to say no when saying yes would go against that in which I believe.
Forgiveness frees the heart and moves us from the victim to the one who is in control of our lives. Lord, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
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NA Just For Today
Keep Coming Back!
"Meetings keep us in touch with where we've been, but more importantly with where we could go in our recovery."
Basic Text, p. 54
In many ways, addicts are different. When we came to Narcotics Anonymous we found others like ourselves, people who understood us and whom we could understand. No longer did we feel like aliens, strangers wherever we went. We were at home in NA meetings, among friends.
We don't stop being addicts after we've been clean awhile. We still need to identify with other addicts. We continue coming to NA meetings to keep in touch with who we are, where we've come from, and where we're going. Every meeting reminds us that we can never use drugs successfully. Every meeting reminds us that we'll never be cured, but that by practicing the principles of the program we can recover. And every meeting offers us the experience and example of other addicts in ongoing recovery.
At meetings, we see how different people work their program, and the results are apparent in their lives. If we want the lives we see others living, we can find out what they've done to get where they are. Narcotics Anonymous meetings offer us identification with where we've been and where we can go — identification we can't do without and can't get anywhere else. That keeps us coming back.
Just for today: I will attend an NA meeting to remind myself of who I am, where I've come from, and where I can go in my recovery.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies. . . . --Erich Fromm
A robin comes alive by breaking out of its shell. The small bird struggles to break out of the safety of the blue egg. Once out, it struggles to grow, slowly learning how to eat, walk, and fly.
We, too, struggle as we grow. There is brokenness in all of our lives--broken hearts and broken dreams. Yet these experiences open our way to a world of growing. We find comfort in the presence of a Power greater than ourselves, in the same way a baby bird finds warmth near the body of its mother. We, too, can grow stronger every day, learning to take in nourishment and trying out our new wings.
What struggles have made me as strong as I am today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Everyone is a bore to someone. That is unimportant. The thing to avoid is being a bore to oneself. --Gerald Brenan
As teenagers most of us were very self-conscious and concerned about how we looked to others. That was a normal stage in development. But, for many of us, our addictions began at that age, or the addictions of others affected us. Our emotional development stopped. We didn't develop an inner reference point, a relationship with our Higher Power that influenced us and helped us weigh other people's opinions.
In recovery, we resumed our emotional and spiritual development where it had stopped. It is liberating to know that how we feel about something is important. We can follow our interests and pursue our commitments. We need not be ruled by others' feelings. With our regular pattern of taking our inventory, praying, and meditating, we are developing a relationship with ourselves which builds character and maturity.
Today, I will give importance to how I feel, what I believe, and what is interesting to me.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Our friends were not unearthly beautiful, Nor spoke with tongues of gold; our lovers blundered now and again when we most sought perfection . . . --Adrienne Rich
So often our expectations exceed reality. We want more than we have; our homes, our loved ones, perhaps our jobs seem not to measure up. "If only"--we say to ourselves. The time has come to quit saying "if only" and be glad, instead, for what is.
We are recovering. We do have friends and family who care about us. We do have exactly what we need at this moment.
We each can make a contribution today for the good of someone else and thus for ourselves. And in the act of looking to this day--to giving something to another human being--we will sense the inner perfection we mistakenly long for in our outer selves.
I can look around me today and be thankful. I will tell someone close that I'm glad we share one another's world.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Getting Needs Met
I want to change careers. . . . I need a friend. . . .Im ready to be in a relationship. . . .
Regularly, we become aware of new needs. We may need to change our behavior with our children. We may need a new couch, love and nurturing, a dollar, or help.
Do not be afraid to recognize a want or need. The birth of a want or need, the temporary frustration from acknowledging a need before its met, is the start of the cycle of receiving what we want. We follow this by letting go, then receiving that which we want and need. Identifying our needs is preparation for good things to come.
Acknowledging our needs means we are being prepared and drawn to that which will meet them. We can have faith to stand in that place in between.
Today, I will let go of my belief that my needs never get met. I will acknowledge my wants and needs, then turn them over to my Higher Power. My Higher Power cares, sometimes about the silliest little things, if I do. My wants and needs are not an accident. God created me, and all my desires.
Change is an action step and I am taking new action today to bring positive change to my life. I know longer accept the unacceptable ways that no longer work for me. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Listen for the Music
The woman at the campground in Olympic National Forest extended an invitation to me. “Some evenings when the soaking pools are closed and the guests are in their cabins, the members of the staff build a campfire, gather round, and sing. Listen for the music. You’re welcome to join us. You’ll have a great time.”
The universe has invited us to join in,too. How often have we heard the music and for some reason been fearful to join in? We don’t have to stand in the shadows, watching others make music, watching others laugh and have a good time Whether it’s a group of friends doing karaoke or simply a good time of love and laughter, when we hear the music in our lives, it’s okay to join in. Some of the best times in my life were spent around a piano making music with the people I love. Some of the most memorable times have been when I forgot my fears and self-consciousness enough to relax and have fun with the people I was with.
Music is all around us. Listen for it. Seek it out. Know you’re welcome to join in. Don’t worry about how well you carry a tune or whether you know all the words. You’ve been invited to the campfire. Come. Sing along. You’ll have the time of your life.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s either/or
A deadline is different from an ultimatum. Deadlines involve the ue of time to get something done. Ultimatums use power.
Ultimatums involve two ideas: an either and an or. Use ultimatums sparingly in your life. Sometimes, however, ultimatum is the only way to get a person’s attention.
Here are some examples: “Either you get sober and stop using drugs, or I’m going to put you in prison.” “Either you start working and stop drinking, or I’m going to take the children and leave.” “Either you show up for work on time, or I’m going to find someone else to do your job.”
Ideally, an ultimatum is not used to control the other person. It is an expression of limits– a powerful way of indicating to the other person that we’re on the verge of screaming when.
Sometimes people use ultimatums as power plays. They use them to play on our fears, particularly our fear of abandonment: “Either you do what I want, or I’ll go away.” “Either you keep quiet and don’t confront my behavior, or I’ll get angry and punish you by being mad.” This may work for a while, but ultimately, it can backfire.
Don’t use ultimatums as power plays, or devices to control the people around you. Don’t let other people use ultimatums to control or manipulate you. Use them as last-ditch warning notices that you’re about to say when.
God, help me be aware of ultimatums, both the ones I dish out and the ones other people use on me.
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A Call to Action
Assembling Your Light Team by Madisyn Taylor
Assembling a team of angelic helpers and ancestors before you need them can save time and anguish when you need them.
Each of us, whether we realize it or not, moves through life in the company of beings whose task is to watch over us. These ancestors, spirit guides, angels, guardians, and ascended masters designated to serve as protectors and guides take pleasure in their roles yet cannot assist us without first being asked. Since the origins of our sacred sentinels differ, we may choose whom we call upon for help based on the situation at hand. However, in certain circumstances, particularly those in which time is of the essence or there is the potential for harm, we may feel the need to surround ourselves with our entire complement of benevolent, watchful guardians at a moment’s notice. To do so, a great shortcut is to create and assemble a light team—a group of spirit helpers who will come to our aid when we utter a simple word or phrase.
The creation of a light team begins with the dedication of the words that will serve as a shortcut in your time of distress, signaling to your sentinels that you are requesting their support. Meditation, at an altar or otherwise, can help you attract their attention, affording you an opportunity to articulate your desire that they work in tandem in certain instances. Creating a short ceremony in which you surround yourself with objects you associate with the helpers you wish to assign to your light team can ensure that those beings are in attendance as you designate your shortcut. Creating this shortcut is simply a tool. You can employ “light team” as your rallying cry or any other words you feel comfortable using. The numerous guides and guardians that see to your welfare will accept your choice gladly and respond instantaneously when called.
Your light team will be there to assist you in those dangerous, chaotic, or confounding moments when you don’t have the time, energy, or opportunity to center yourself and meditate on individual sentinels. You can also call upon them when seeking guidance that originates from a variety of perspectives. Whether the support they provide comes in the form of guidance or wisdom, their combined presence will give you a sense of security that strengthens you and reminds you that you are never alone. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
“The language of friendship is not words, but meanings,” wrote Thoreau. Life indeed takes on new menaings, as well as new meaning in The Program. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends — this is an experience not to be missed. Can I recall my inital reactions when I came to The Program? Do I believe that I’ve finally come home?
Today I Pray
As The Program has given life new meanings for me, may I pass along to others that same chance to re-evaluate their lives in the light of sobriety, commonj purpose, friendhips and spiritual expansion. Prasie God for my new vision of human life. Praise Him for restoring for me the value and purpose of living.
Today I Will Remember
I value my Life.
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One More Day
Out of a sense of duty and a desire to protect a loved one, a vicious cycle of misinterpretation, guesswork, silence, and isolation is initiated.
– Neil A. Fiore
For a while we may have tried to protect our loved ones by not talking about our illness. We may have even secretly hoped that it would go away if we didn’t talk about it. We learned, however, that this would never be and that problems often escalate if they are not dealt with.
We see more clearly now that we can’t protect our family members or our friends. Trying to protect them meant denying our own feelings and ignoring theirs. We’ve discovered that our loved one don’t need to be — and often don’t want to be — protected. And when we don’t protect them, we’ve found that we and the people we love are growing and becoming stronger.
I can be honest with my loved ones about my feelings and needs.
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Food For Thought
A Reason to Be Thin
How many times have we been determined to lose weight for a specific occasion or event? A trip, a wedding, a new job, a holiday - there are many such occasions which may have provided inspiration for short term reducing. The problem with losing weight for a specific event is that when it is over there is nothing left to provide an incentive for maintaining the weight loss.
Many of us have spent years losing and gaining the same pounds over and over again. Since the reasons for losing were superficial, the loss was temporary.
What we need is a permanent reason to be rid of fat. When we abstain from compulsive eating and work the OA program, we not only lose weight but we also live better. We have more enthusiasm, satisfaction, and peace of mind, as well as better looks and health. Our reason to be thin is that it gives us a richer, fuller life not just for one occasion but every day. The benefits are worth the price.
May I want to be thin for the right reasons.
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One Day At A Time
THOUGHTS
“The universe is transformation;
our lives are what our thoughts make it.”
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
The power of our thoughts is astounding, and my negative thoughts kept me in chains for many years. I was constantly thinking of what was not right, what I didn't do right, what needs of mine went unmet. My life was miserable by my own making. My own thoughts kept me in a prison of negativity. The only person who had the key was me. For many years I stayed locked in, not knowing the key was in my possession..
When I came to the program I learned that I had responsibility for my “side of the street.” I finally came to understand that I was able to change my thinking, one day at a time. It was a slow process. It took a life-time to learn negative thinking patterns, and it took years to learn positive thinking patterns. Using the tools of the program was the key to re-educating my mind. At meetings I heard positive statements that others made about themselves and me. Reading program literature was always a positive experience. As I chose nurturing, loving sponsors, they affirmed me and my baby steps toward wholeness and healing. All of these, and other tools, worked slowly to bring about an awareness that I held the key to my own prison door and gave me the courage to take the key and free myself from negativity..
One day at a time...
I will choose positive thoughts and actions that bring me freedom.
~ Carolyn H.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
STEP SIX. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? - Pg. 76 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Have I identified myself clearly as a chemically dependent person suffering from a chronic disease? We have short memories and it is easy to forget why we sought help in the first place. In this disease, only abstinence can pave the way to recovery, so we must never lose sight of our first step.
I admit that I suffer from the disease of addiction and this is my first step toward health--help me remember!
Spiritual Transformation
Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person -- respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it. Today I give and receive the gift of peace.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Frequently, addicts and alcoholics who experience difficulties will isolate in order to lick their wounds like an injured animal. You may not want to bother us, you may be embarrassed by your blunders, or you may think it's not our business. When you don't use our friendship, we can't do our job.
Friends are God's way of taking care of me.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Surrender is riding the bus in the direction it's going.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Change is an action step and I am taking new action today to bring positive change to my life. I know longer accept the unacceptable ways that no longer work for me.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I drank that first drink and all my Irish DNA said: 'Yes!' - Nancy N.
bluidkiti
05-12-2021, 12:24 PM
May 22
Daily Reflections
STEP ONE
WE . . . (The first word of the First Step)
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21
When I was drinking all I could ever think about was "I, I, I,"
or "Me, Me, Me." Such painful obsessions of self, such soul
sickness, such spiritual selfishness bound me to the bottle for
more than half my life.
The journey to find God and to do His will one day at a time
began with the first word of the First Step . . . "We." There
was power in numbers, there was strength in numbers, there was
safety in numbers, and for an alcoholic like me, there was
life in numbers, If I had tried to recover alone I probably
would have died. With God and another alcoholic I have a
divine purpose in my life . . . I have become a channel for
God's healing love.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
What impresses us most at an A.A. meeting is the willingness
to share, without holding anything back. And pretty soon we
find ourselves sharing also. We start telling our own
experiences and by so doing we help the other person. And
when we've got these things off our chest, we feel a lot
better. It does us a lot of good to share with some other
poor unfortunate person who's in the same box that we were
in. And the more we share, the more we have left for ourselves.
Do I know that the more I share, the better chance I'll have
to stay sober?
Meditation For The Day
Constantly claim God's strength. Once convinced of the right
of a course of action, once reasonably sure of God's guidance,
claim that strength now. You can claim all the strength you
need to meet any situation. You can claim a new supply when
your own supply is exhausted. You have a right to claim it and
you should use your right. A beggar supplicates, a child
appropriates. When you supplicate, you are often kept waiting,
but when you appropriate God's strength in a good cause, you
have it at once.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may claim God's strength whenever I need it. I
pray that I may try to live as a child of God.
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As Bill Sees It
God-Given Instincts, p. 142
Creation gave us instincts for a purpose. Without them we wouldn't
be complete human beings. If men and women didn't exert
themselves to be secure in their persons, made no effort to harvest
food or construct shelter, there would be no survival. If they didn't
reproduce, the earth wouldn't be populated. If there were no social
instinct, there would be no society.
Yet these instincts, so necessary for our existence, often far exceed
their proper functions. Powerfully, blindly, many times subtly, they
drive us, dominate us, and insist upon ruling our lives.
<< << << >> >> >>
We tried to shape a sane ideal for our future sex life. We subjected
each relation to this test: Was it selfish or not? We asked God to
mold our ideals and help us to live up to them. We remembered
always that our sex powers were God-given and therefore good,
neither to be used lightly or selfishly nor to be despised and loathed.
1. 12 & 12, p. 42
2. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 69
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Walk in Dry Places
Emotional sobriety may be elusive
Serenity
It is easy to know when one is maintaining sobriety as far as alcohol is concerned. Emotional sobriety is more difficult to measure, because is it usually gauged by our behavior and feelings in response to people and situations.
If we lack emotional sobriety, we are likely to end up in "dry drunks". This means we lose emotional control under pressure or when threatened. We may think we have this control, yet find ourselves falling apart when seemingly small problems come up.
Maybe we have to accept that we will never have all the emotional control that we admire in others. This emotional sensitivity may even be part of our alcoholism. Most important, we must ensure that emotional binges do not become binges involving real booze.
Nor should wed judge ourselves too harshly when we undergo another emotional binge, or "dry drunk." Such judgmental attitudes, even toward ourselves, may be a form of false pride.
Today I'll seek all the serenity I can find. If I lose my cool temporarily, I'll accept it as part of my general problem and get back to orderly thinking as quickly as possible.
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Keep It Simple
Showing up is 80 percent of life.---Woody Allen
Life is full of things we don't want to do. Yet when all parts of us( mind, body, spirit) show up, things go okay. By being there, we can learn about ourselves and help others.
Showing up means we care about our program. It means we speak up at meetings. It means we care about our family, our friends, the world. It means we listen when a friend has a bad day. It means seeing ourselves in others. It means we talk to someone who bothers us. Showing up means we laugh when something seems funny. It means we cry when we feel sad. We're important, and we need to bring our mind, body, and spirit with us---wherever we go. Have I learned to show up, all of me?
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me show up for my life. Help me show up to do my part in Your plan today.
Today's Action: As I go through my day, I'll think about how I'm showing up for my life. I'll be proud of myself for doing my part.
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Each Day a New Beginning
The change of one simple behavior can affect other behaviors and thus change many things. --Jean Baer
Our behavior tells others and ourselves, who we are. Frequently, we find ourselves behaving in ways that keep us stuck or embarrass us. Or we may feel deep shame for our behavior in a certain instance. Our behavior will never totally please us. But deciding we want to change some behavior and using the program to help us, is a first step.
Remember, imperfections are human and very acceptable. However, changing a particular behavior, maybe deciding to take a walk every morning rather than sleeping 30 extra minutes, will change how we feel about ourselves. And a minor change such as this can have a remarkable effect on our outlook, our attitudes.
The dilemma for many of us for so long was the fear we couldn't change. But we can. And we can help each other change, too.
One small change today--a smile at the first person I meet--meditation before dinner--a few minutes of exercise--will help me chart a new course. I will encourage another woman to join me in this effort too, and I will be on my way.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
The bill collectors, the sheriffs, the angry taxi drivers, the policemen, the bums, the pals, and even the ladies they sometimes brought home—our husbands thought we were so inhospitable. “Joykiller, nag, wet blanket”—that’s what they said. Next day they would be themselves again and we would forgive and try to forget.
p. 106
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
He furthered explained that alcohol was no respecter of sex or background but that most of the alcoholics he had encountered had better-than-average minds and abilities. He said the alcoholics seemed to possess a native acuteness and usually excelled in their fields, regardless of environmental or educational advantages.
p. 272
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
Just as firmly bound by obligation are the members of Alcoholics Anonymous, who have demonstrated that they can help problem drinkers as others seldom can. The unique ability of each A.A. to identify himself with, and bring recovery to, the newcomer in no way depends upon his learning, eloquence, or on any special individual skills. the only thing that matters is that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety. These legacies of suffering and of recovery are easily passed among alcoholics, one to the other. This is our gift from god, and its bestowal upon others like us is the one aim that today animates A.A.'s all around the globe.
pp. 150-151
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You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because
you stopped laughing.
--unknown
God cannot help those who do not seize opportunities.
--Chinese Proverb
Help yourself and God will help you.
--Dutch Proverb
"No one grows old by living, only by losing interest in living."
--Marie Beynon Ray
"There is just one life for each of us: our own."
--Euripides
Too often we under estimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind
word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of
caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
--Leo Buscaglia
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
EARTH
"This could be such a beautiful world."
Rosalind Welcher
The beauty that I see in the world also reveals a sadness - a sadness in
knowing that it could be a much more loving and accepting place for
everybody. If only we would get together in our difference instead of
demanding sameness.
We destroy so much God--given beauty by our desire to control,
understand and arrogantly pursue a philosophy of selfishness - and we
all lose.
But my spiritual hope for tomorrow comes in the creative choices I
make today.
Let me be a good steward in Your world because it is Your gift to me.
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"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and
dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many
seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates
his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must
follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will
honor the one who serves me."
John 12:24-26
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Daily Inspiration
To be happy, we must live in the present. Living in the past often brings painful memories and living in the future can bring worry and fear. Lord, when my thoughts slip away, help me quickly return my attention to where I am at this moment.
God is always at work in your life. Notice His light on the events of your day. Lord, I sometimes look without really seeing. Help me to pause and notice.
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NA Just For Today
Symptoms Of A Spiritual Awakening
"The steps lead to an awakening of a spiritual nature. This awakening is evidenced by changes in our lives."
Basic Text, p. 48
We know how to recognize the disease of addiction. Its symptoms are indisputable. Besides an uncontrollable appetite for drugs, those suffering exhibit self-centered, self-seeking behavior. When our addiction was at its peak of activity, we were obviously in a great deal of pain. We relentlessly judged ourselves and others, and spent most of our time worrying or trying to control outcomes.
Just as the disease of addiction is evidenced by definite symptoms, so is a spiritual awakening made manifest by certain obvious signs in a recovering addict. We may observe a tendency to think and act spontaneously, a loss of interest in judging or interpreting the actions of anyone else, an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment, and frequent attacks of smiling.
If we see someone exhibiting symptoms of a spiritual awakening, we should be aware that such awakenings are contagious. Our best course of action is to get close to these people. As we begin having frequent, overwhelming episodes of gratitude, an increased receptiveness to the love extended by our fellow members, and an uncontrollable urge to return this love, we'll realize that we, too, have had a spiritual awakening.
Just for today: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening. I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If it's sanity you're after, there's no recipe like laughter. --Henry Rutherford Elliot
A smile is the earliest form of communication. A human infant smiles in the first few weeks of life. As the child grows, it learns how to turn the smile into a laugh--a joyous response reflecting pleasure.
A sense of humor, a feeling of fun, and an ability to laugh are all signs of emotional maturity. Healthy laughter frees us; it is the sunshine that makes life's shadows interesting. When we develop the ability to see the humor in a situation, we gain the ability to handle it.
We were born with smiles. They are as much a part of us as our teeth and hair. Polished and cared for, our smiles can grow into a sense of humor that will help us through the painful times.
How can I turn troubles into smiles today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If you do not express your own original ideas, if you do not listen to your own being, you will have betrayed yourself. --Rollo May
Those of us who go around trying to be right and do everything right are likely to betray ourselves. We stifle our impulses and control our intuition because we can't be certain that we are correct. As a spiritual exercise, we could stop now and listen to our inner selves and state our own ideas. What comes out may break the illusion of perfection and free us to proceed with life.
We all have original ideas if we just notice them. What images come to mind while listening to music? What do our dreams tell us? New insights sometimes come by physical activity. Conversation with a friend can help lead us to our wisdom. Our growing strength as recovering men requires that we listen to our own messages and then take some risks to express them.
Today, I will take risks by stating my ideas. I will stand up for myself by listening to my intuition.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The change of one simple behavior can affect other behaviors and thus change many things. --Jean Baer
Our behavior tells others and ourselves, who we are. Frequently, we find ourselves behaving in ways that keep us stuck or embarrass us. Or we may feel deep shame for our behavior in a certain instance. Our behavior will never totally please us. But deciding we want to change some behavior and using the program to help us, is a first step.
Remember, imperfections are human and very acceptable. However, changing a particular behavior, maybe deciding to take a walk every morning rather than sleeping 30 extra minutes, will change how we feel about ourselves. And a minor change such as this can have a remarkable effect on our outlook, our attitudes.
The dilemma for many of us for so long was the fear we couldn't change. But we can. And we can help each other change, too.
One small change today--a smile at the first person I meet--meditation before dinner--a few minutes of exercise--will help me chart a new course. I will encourage another woman to join me in this effort too, and I will be on my way.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Times of Reprogramming
Do not ask for love unless you're ready to be healed enough to give and receive love.
Do not ask for joy unless you're ready to feel and release your pain, so you can feel joy.
Do not ask for success unless you're ready to conquer the behaviors that would sabotage success.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could imagine ourselves having or becoming - and then immediately receiving - what we wanted? We can have and be the good things we want. All good things are ours for the asking. But first, groundwork - preparation work - must be done.
A gardener would not plant seeds unless the ground was adequately prepared to nurture and nourish those seeds. The planting would be wasted effort. It would be wasted effort for us to get what we wanted before we were ready.
First, we need to become aware of our need or desire. This may not be easy! Many of us have become accustomed to shutting off the inner voice of our wants, needs, and desires. Sometimes, life has to work hard to get our attention.
Next we let go of the old programming: the behavior and beliefs that interfere with nurturing and nourishing the good. Many of us have strong sabotaging programs, learned from childhood, that need to be released. We may need to act as if for a while until the belief that we deserve the good becomes real.
We combine this process with much letting go, while we are being changed at the core.
There is naturalness to this process, but it can be intense. Things take time.
Good things are ours for the asking, if we are willing to participate in the work of groundbreaking. Work and wait.
Today, God, give me the courage to identify the good I want in my life and to ask for it. Give me also the faith and stamina I need to go through the work that must be accomplished first.
Today I choose to feel love in this moment. Today I choose to let love fill my day and bring joy. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Learn the Art of Joyful Living
Let’s pretend for a moment we have a friend who’s with us much of the time. This friend watches us, watches our lives and circumstances, and comments: Oh, that’s too bad. That’s terrible. That’s awful. You could be doing better. You’re not doing very well. What’s wrong with you? Why did you do that? This friend isn’t very pleasant, but many of us have brought such a friend with us through much of our journey.
Now, let’s imagine something different. Let’s imagine a friend, a constant companion, who laughs a lot. This friend laughs at traffic, laughs at delays, laughs at long lines. Even laughs at setbacks. Of course, this friend doesn’t mock us or laugh at us when we’re in pain. This friend is compassionate and gentle, and has an open heart. But he or she helps us laugh, even when we hurt.
This friend has learned the art of joy, the art of living, and the art of living joyfully.
Let’s bring along the friend who knows the art of joyful living to help us learn the same.
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More language of letting go
Say when the price is too high
The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.
–Henry David Thoreau
Consider the young man who was doing great in his high school studies, then suddenly started to fall behind. One day a teacher pulled the young man aside and asked him what happened. The student told him that he had asked his father for a car, and the father told him that if he earned the money, he could have one. The student, being industrious and hard working, went out, got a job, saved the money, and bought the car. But then the car needed insurance, gas, and maintenance, so the student kept the job to keep up the car. The job took up more and more of his time, until finally he began to fall behind in his studies.
“Why don’t you just get rid of the car?” asked the teacher.
“Get rid of the car?” came the reply, “but how would I get to my job?”
How often we feel that if we just get that new car, that new boyfriend or girlfriend, that promotion, or the condo in the good neighborhood, we will find happiness and contentment– only to discover that the thing just brings with it more pain, more costs, and more bother than it’s worth. The new sports car runs only half the time, the new partner needs more care than your dog, the promotion eats up your weekends, and the new condo won’t allow pets.
Things don’t bring true happiness. Instead, they often sap your strength and leave you emptier than you were before. Think about the true cost of a thing before you pursue it– in time, lifestyle changes, energy, maintanence, and money. Can you really afford the amount of life that the thing will take from you in return for the happiness it brings? Are you willing to pay the price?
God, help me be aware of the true cost of the things in my life.
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Setting the Tone
Starting Your Day Well by Madisyn Taylor
A gentle, reflective, and thoughtful morning will prepare you to create a gentle, conscious, and thoughtful day.
The choices you make upon waking can have a profound impact on your day. If, still drowsy, you hit the ground running, rushing to prepare yourself to face your worldly obligations, you will likely feel fatigued and overwhelmed for most of your day. A leisurely and relaxing morning, on the other hand, can energize and excite you, as well as give you the courage to meet the challenges waiting for you. By beginning your day in a focused and centered fashion, you make it your own. You set the tone of your expectations and choose the mood you will use to respond to your circumstances. A gentle, reflective, and thoughtful morning will prepare you to create a gentle, conscious, and thoughtful day.
The simplest way to eliminate the rush from your morning routine is to rise earlier. Getting children into routines and getting themselves ready as much as possible will also give you more time. Though this may seem like a hardship at first, you will soon grow to love the extra minutes or hours that afford you an opportunity to really enjoy watching the sun come up or connect with your loved ones before you go in your separate directions. There are many more ways you can constructively use the time you gain. A mere half-hour of introspection in which you examine your goals, thank the universe for the richness in your life, and contemplate the blessings you will receive this day can lift your spirit and help you formulate lasting positive expectations. Likewise, you can solidify your day’s intention through spoken affirmations or the words you record in a journal. Or, if you want little more than to enjoy your day, devote a portion of your personal time to activities that bot! h ground and delight you, such as meditation, yoga, chanting, singing, reading, or listening to music. If you feel, however, that there is little room for change in your start-of-the-day routine, try to make each activity you engage in upon waking a ritual in its own right. The time you spend everyday savoring a soothing cup of tea or washing away tension in a hot shower can serve as a potent reminder of the need to care for yourself no matter what the hour.
Your morning is yours and should reflect not only your practical needs but also the needs of your soul. When you center yourself at the start of your day, you will likely find it easier to remain centered during subsequent work, play, and downtime because the overall sense of serenity you create through your choices will stay with you throughout the day. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I first listened to people in The Program talking freely and honestly about themselves, I was stunned. Their stories of their own addictive escapades, of their own secret fears, and of their own gnawing loneliness were literally mind-blowing for me. I discovered — and hardly dared believe it at first — that I’m not alone. I’m not all that different from everybody else and, in fact, we’re all very much the same. I began to sense that I do belong somewhere, and my loneliness began to leave me. Do I try to give to others what has been given freely to me?
Today I Pray
May I begin to see, as the life stories of my friends in The Program unfold for me, that our similarities are far more startling than our differences. As I listen to their accounts of addition and recovery, may I experience often that small shock of recognition, a “hey-that’s-me!” feeling that is quick to chase away my separateness. May I become a wholehearted member of the group, giving and taking in equal parts.
Today I Will Remember
Sameness, not Differences.
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One More Day
Happiness is like time and space — we make and measure it ourselves; it is as fancy, as big, as little, as you please; just a thing of contrasts and comparisons.
– George du Marier
Happiness is a reference point, a relative state of mind to which we compare other emotions. Being happy is one of our ultimate goals. How we get there or if we get there often depends on how we live and how we treat other people.
When we were children, many of our needs were taken care of by others. Now, it is more often we who must create our own happiness. We are no longer children dependent on others for our dreams and joys. We are adults, free to make our happiness in any form or shape we wish.
My happiness depends on me, not on others.
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Food For Thought
When in Doubt, Don't
If a particular food is not on our plan, we do not eat it. When in doubt, leave it out. If there is a question in our minds about the advisability of eating a certain food, we are most likely better off without it. Whether we are losing weight or maintaining our weight loss, there will be some foods we choose to avoid, since past experience has proven that we cannot handle them in moderation.
The principle of "when in doubt, don't" may extend to other areas of our lives. If we are unsure of a particular course of action, it is best not to go rushing into it. As we learn to listen to the inner voice, we become more responsive to the leading of our Higher Power. Our knowledge of His will for our lives becomes more solid and we develop a firm basis for decision.
When we are willing to wait for direction, it comes. Indecision may be turned over to our Higher Power for His clarification.
Give us prudence, Lord, to follow Your lead.
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One Day At A Time
~ FAITH ~
The inability of the materialistic mind to grasp the idea of the Life Eternal
is no proof of the non-existence of that life.
‘Abdu’l-Baha
I grew up in a family where there was no belief in the existence of God, although we were told that it was up to us to decide where to put our faith.
I struggled through various addictions and disorders, but never forgot that one special time as a child, where I spontaneously went down on my knees one night to pray to God, who for a few moments had suddenly become very real.
As an adult, my belief in a Higher Power came and went like the breeze, so that some days I was an atheist, others an agnostic, and at other times filled with an awareness that God is in all things.
I am grateful that my addiction to overeating has brought me to this Twelve Step program. Every day I come to believe that a Power greater than myself can restore my sense of balance, and I make sure that I put in effort to maintain my conscious connection with God.
One Day at a Time . . .
I pray that my spiritual faculties and aspirations will daily increase, and that I will never allow the material senses to veil my eyes from the light of my Higher Power.
~ John M. ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. - Pg. 86 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Right now you can concentrate on getting through withdrawal one hour at a time. Don't worry about tomorrow morning or next week, just this hour, just this day. You've already made it without anything for this long--now keep going forward!
Fill me with the knowledge that I can do anything for just this hour, just this day.
Forgiveness
Today, I am willing to take a leap of faith into a process of forgiveness. My willingness to consider forgiveness as an option says that I want more out of life and relationships, that I am engaged and alive. I am willing to feel, to love and be loved. This implies that I value myself more than I value winning, prevailing or revenge. Forgiveness is the ultimate statement of self-love. If I love myself I don't want to do things to hurt myself. Some things aren't within my control but forgiveness is. I can't always make sure I don't get hurt but I can have much to say about how I react to getting hurt.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
God is the answer, now what is the problem? Problem with the word 'God?' According to Random House Dictionary--Life, Truth, Love, Mind, Soul, Spirit, and Principle are all synonymous for 'God.' The above statement could just as easily be 'Life, Truth, Love, Mind, Soul, Spirit, and Principle are the answers. Now what is the problem?'
Today, I let go of the labels that stand between me and my understanding of God.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
An alcoholic is an individual who takes the most simple program and works on it until he has eventually reduced it to its most complicated form.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I choose to feel love in this moment. Today I choose to let love fill my day and bring joy.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Restlessness and discontent are the first necessities of progress. - Thomas Edison
bluidkiti
05-16-2021, 02:02 AM
May 23
Daily Reflections
SPIRITUAL HEALTH
When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out
mentally and physically.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p 64
It is very difficult for me to come to terms with my
spiritual illness because of my great pride, disguised by
my material successes and my intellectual power.
Intelligence is not incompatible with humility, provided
I place humility first. To seek prestige and wealth is
the ultimate goal for many in the modern world. To be
fashionable and to seem better than I really am is a
spiritual illness.
To recognize and to admit my weakness is the beginning of
good spiritual health. It is a sign of spiritual health
to be able to ask God every day to enlighten me, to
recognize His will, and to have the strength to execute
it. My spiritual health is excellent when I realize that
the better I get, the more I discover how much help I
need from others.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
The Twelfth Step of A.A., working with others, can be
subdivided into five parts, five words beginning with the
letter C; confidence, confession, conviction, conversion,
and continuance. The first thing in trying to help other
alcoholics is to get their confidence. We do this by telling
them our own experiences with drinking, so that they see
that we know what we're talking about. If we share our
experiences frankly, they will know that we are sincerely
trying to help them. They will realize that they're not alone
and that others have had experiences as bad or worse than
theirs. This gives them confidence that they can be helped.
Do I care enough about other alcoholics to get their confidence?
Meditation For The Day
I fail not so much when tragedy happens as I did before the
happening, by all the little things I might have done, but did
not do. I must prepare for the future by doing the right thing
at the right time now. If a thing should be done, I should deal
with that thing today and get it righted with God before I
allow myself to undertake any new duty. I should look upon
myself as performing God's errands and then coming back to Him
to tell Him in quiet communion that the message has been
delivered or the task done.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may seek no credit for the results of what I do.
I pray that I may leave the outcome of my actions to God.
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As Bill Sees It
A.A.'s School of Life, p. 143
Within A.A., I suppose, we shall always quarrel a good bit. Mostly, I
think, about how to do the greatest good for the greatest number of
drunks. We shall have our childish spats and snits over small
questions of money management and who is going to run our groups
for the next six months. Any bunch of growing children (and that is
what we are) would hardly be in character if they did less.
These are the growing pains of infancy, and we actually thrive on
them. Surmounting such problems, in A.A.'s rather rugged school of
life, is a healthy exercise.
A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 233
************************************************** *********
Walk in Dry Places
Avoid the paralysis of analysis
Practical Spirituality
The good news of the Twelve step program is that we have a Higher Power whose presence serves as a source of guidance and understanding as we go through each day. Letting this power work through us is only a matter of will..... God drawsas near to us as we wish to draw near to God.
As we let our Higher Power work, we remember that no scientific explanation for this process is necessary. We could paralyse our spiritual activity by trying to analyze it, thus bringing about an undesirable "paralysis or analysis." It's also not necessary to win another's endorsement of what we're trying to do. We must not be influenced by any scorn or ridicule of our efforts.
All that's necessary is that we know God in our own lives and stay faithful to our program. We let the presence of God work freely and smoothly as we go about our business.
I'll work today with the comfortable knowledge that God is really doing work through me.
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Keep It Simple
The present will not long endure.---Pindar
At certain moments, our best friend is time. Time is a gift given us. Time helps us heal. We need to know that when things are tough, these times will pass, and peace will return. Our Higher Power can be like a parent who comforts a child when there's a storm outside. The parent gently reminds the child the sun will shine again.
Tough times come and go. There will be times when life is ugly and very painful. We can't be happy all the time. Remember, our Higher Power is always there. We must have faith in this. A saying often heard in the program is, "This too shall pass."
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, remind me that things will get better. Even if they get worst for a while, they will get better. Let this be my prayer in hard times.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll list times in my life when I thought I couldn't go on. I'll remember the pain, but I'll also remember how time was my friend.
************************************************** *********
Each Day a New Beginning
Give as much of yourself as you can to as much of your higher power as you can understand. --S.H.
The more we are in concert with God, the greater will be our pleasures in life. Recognizing our partnership with our higher power makes every decision easier, facilitates the completion of every task, and removes all uncertainty about our value to this world, particularly to those persons around us.
Knowledge that we are never alone, that in every circumstance our best interests are being cared for, softens whatever blow we encounter. The blows teach us; they are the lessons the inner self has requested, and let us never forget we have a ready tutor to see us through every assignment.
The more we rely on God to see us through the mundane activities as well as the troubling experiences, the greater will be our certainty that all is well, our lives are on course, and a plan is unfolding little by little that has our best interests at its center.
My understanding of God and the power of that presence is proportionate to my reliance on that power. Not unlike the power of electricity, I can plug into the source of the "light" of understanding and for the strength to see my way through any experience today.
************************************************** *********
Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
We have tried to hold the love of our children for their father. We have told small tots that father was sick, which was much nearer the truth than we realized. They struck the children, kicked out door panels, smashed treasured crockery, and ripped the keys out of pianos. In the midst of such pandemonium they may have rushed out threatening to live with the other woman forever. In desperation, we have even got tight ourselves—the drunk to end all drunks. The unexpected result was that our husbands seemed to like it.
p. 106
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
"We watch the alcoholic performing in a position of responsibility, and we know that because he is drinking heavily and daily, he has cut his capacities by 50 percent, and still he seems able to do a satisfactory job. And we wonder how much further this man could go if his alcoholic problem could be removed and he could throw 100 percent of his abilities into action.
p. 272
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
There is another reason for this singleness of purpose. It is the great paradox of A.A. that we know we can seldom keep the precious gift of sobriety unless we give it away. If a group of doctors possessed a cancer cure, they might be conscience-stricken if they failed their mission through self-seeking. Yet such a failure wouldn't jeopardize their personal survival. for us, if we neglect those who are still sick, there is unremitting danger to our own lives and sanity. Under these compulsions of self-preservation, duty, and love, it is not strange that our Society has concluded that it has but one high mission - to carry the A.A. message to those who don't know there is a way out.
p. 151
************************************************** *********
Upon receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, Mother Teresa said:
"What can you do to promote world peace?
Go home and love your family."
--Cited in BITS & PIECES
Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself, and know that
everything in this life has purpose. There are no mistakes, no
coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.
--Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
"There's no elevator, you have to take the steps."
--unknown
"Yard by yard it's very hard. But inch by inch, it's a cinch."
--Anon.
"What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step."
--Antoine de Saint-Exupery
"If we take care of the inches, we will not have to worry about the
miles."
--Hartley Coleridge
This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love;
the more they give, the more they possess.
--Rainer Maria Rilke
************************************************** *********
Father Leo's Daily Meditation
EFFORT
"Do what you can, with what
you have, where you are."
--Theodore Roosevelt
Because we are not perfect, we need only do our best. Because our
recovery from addiction is an on-going process, we will discover that
our best is improving on a daily basis. It is so easy to beat ourselves up
emotionally by thinking that our best is not good enough. Even after
years of recovery we still hear the old tapes: "People do not want to
listen to you." "Is that all that you can do?"
We need to remember that the disease of addiction still lives in our
recovery. However, our honest attempts at dealing with a problem or
helping another with a problem - provided they are honest attempts -
will usually be more than sufficient.
Today I accept my best attempts with gratitude and I am not too proud
to seek the advice of another.
God, accept the best that I can offer as an instrument of Your peace.
************************************************** *********
He who guards his mouth and his tongue, guards his soul from troubles.
Proverbs 21:23
All things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received
them, and they shall be granted.
Mark 11:24
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Daily Inspiration
Instead of overreacting, try underreacting because this response shows wisdom, patience and peace. Lord, help me respond to situations in a manner that allows me to solve problems rather than create more.
Be sensitive to the feelings of others and show the same forgiveness and compassion that the Lord gives to you. Lord, give me the wisdom to know when to speak and when to listen.
************************************************** *********
NA Just For Today
Amends And Sponsors
"We want to be free of our guilt, but we don't wish to do so at the expense of anyone else."
Basic Text, p. 39
Let's face it: Most of us left trails of destruction in our wakes and harmed anyone who got in our way. Some of the people we hurt most in our addiction were the people we loved most. In an effort to purge ourselves of the guilt we feel for what we've done, we may be tempted to share with our loved ones, in gruesome detail, things that are better left unsaid. Such disclosures could do much harm and may do little good.
The Ninth Step is not about easing our guilty consciences; it's about taking responsibility for the wrongs we've done. In working our Eighth and Ninth Steps, we should seek the guidance of our sponsor and amend our wrongs in a manner that won't cause us to owe more amends. We are not just seeking freedom from remorse—we are seeking freedom from our defects. We never again want to inflict harm on our loved ones. One way to insure that we do not is by working the Ninth Step responsibly, checking our motives, and discussing with our sponsor the particular amends we plan to make before we make them.
Just for today: I wish to accept responsibility for my actions. Before making any amends, I will talk with my sponsor.
************************************************** *********
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The prayer of the chicken hawk does not get him the chicken. --Swahili Proverb
Imagine flying high over the grassy plains searching with piercing eyes for dinner down below. The sun is warm on our backs as we catch the heated updrafts and rest, always watching, always praying, that dinner will be provided for the little ones back in the nest.
Dinner will be provided, of that the hawk is sure. It has faith. But the faith and the prayer will not put the chicken in its talons. It is going to have to keep looking, and, when it spots the prey, its wings will fold back, and its sleek body will plummet out of the sky. It will brake quickly with broad wings and clasp the unsuspecting supper on the fly.
Like the hawk, once we have prayed, we must get to work. Our goal isn't going to be done for us. We can pray for the strength and wisdom we will need to get it done, and that prayer will be answered. But, as the hawk knows, it's up to us to do the work.
What is my goal today, and my first step toward it?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
You see, I just can't stop! Or tie myself to any one. I have affairs that last as long as a year, a year and a half, months and months of love, both tender and voluptuous, but in the end - it is as inevitable as death - time marches on and lust peters out. --Philip Roth
Fears of intimacy, of learning about ourselves in a committed relationship, have kept many of us lonely. Focusing on the need for a sexual high helps us avoid the intimacy we fear. Whether we are in a long-term relationship or not, thinking that sex is love limits our chances for a comfortable intimacy. Sex is an expression of an intimacy that already exists, rather than a way to become intimate.
Many of us fear closeness beyond the romantic stage. Others of us have pursued closeness, but when we met our own emptiness we said that wasn't the right person for us and ran in search of another excitement. The problem for us isn't the choice between singleness and marriage, but between letting someone truly know us or not.
I will set aside my fears and learn the pleasure of intimacy.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Give as much of yourself as you can to as much of your higher power as you can understand. --S.H.
The more we are in concert with God, the greater will be our pleasures in life. Recognizing our partnership with our higher power makes every decision easier, facilitates the completion of every task, and removes all uncertainty about our value to this world, particularly to those persons around us.
Knowledge that we are never alone, that in every circumstance our best interests are being cared for, softens whatever blow we encounter. The blows teach us; they are the lessons the inner self has requested, and let us never forget we have a ready tutor to see us through every assignment.
The more we rely on God to see us through the mundane activities as well as the troubling experiences, the greater will be our certainty that all is well, our lives are on course, and a plan is unfolding little by little that has our best interests at its center.
My understanding of God and the power of that presence is proportionate to my reliance on that power. Not unlike the power of electricity, I can plug into the source of the "light" of understanding and for the strength to see my way through any experience today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Enjoyment
Life is not to be endured; life is to be enjoyed and embraced.
The belief that we must square our shoulders and get through a meager, deprived existence for far off rewards in Heaven is a codependent belief.
Yes, most of us still have times when life will be stressful and challenge our endurance skills. But in recovery, were learning to live, to enjoy our life, and handle situations as they come.
Our survival skills have served us well. They have gotten us through difficult times - as children and adults. Our ability to freeze feelings, deny problems, deprive ourselves, and cope with stress has helped us get where we are today. But were safe now. Were learning to do more than survive. We can let go of unhealthy survival behaviors. Were learning new, better ways to protect and care for ourselves. Were free to feel our feelings, identify and solve problems, and give ourselves the best. Were free to open up and come alive.
Today, I will let go of my unhealthy endurance and survival skills. I will choose a new mode of living, one that allows me to be alive and enjoy the adventure.
I do not need to know anything about this day beyond this moment. This moment is perfect...just as it is and I can handle anything in this moment. My Higher Power gives me all the strength I need today to handle whatever comes up in this moment. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Trust That Guidance Will Come
Trust and act on the guidance you have now.
Some parts of our lives appear like a long, paved highway. We can see exactly where to go; we have a panoramic view. Other times, it may feel like we’re driving in the dark with only one headlight on a winding road through the fog. We can only see a few feet in front of the car.
Don’t worry if you can’t see that far ahead, if you only have a glimmer of light to guide your path. Slow down. Listen to your heart. Guidance will come. Trust what you hear. Do the small thing. Take the one step. Go as far as you can see.
Then go back to your heart, and you’ll hear the next step. It may be a step of immediate action, or deliberate inaction. Sometimes you may have to quiet down, wait, and prepare yourself to hear what you’re to do next.
Trust and act on the guidance you have now, and more will come.
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More language of letting go
Say when the time is right
If you wait for the perfect moment when all is safe and assured, it may never arrive. Mountains will not be climbed, races won, or lasting happiness achieved.
– Maurice Chevalier
“I’m just waiting for the time to be right!” is a common excuse we use. We can sit on the sidelines, waiting for the perfect moment, but never get in the game. Sometimes, the time doesn’t feel right. I was too old when I started to sky dive, too poor when I started writing, too enmeshed with an alcoholic husband when I began recovering from codependency, and too involved with my addictions when I began recovery. The time may never be right. You can choose to wait until someday arrives, or you can begin now.
Is there a dream hidden away in your life, something you wanted to do but put off for so long that you’ve almost forgotten what it is? Maybe the time is right to pull it out again. Get the college course guide and sign up. Go to a local gym and start working out. Take a chance.
The right time for the journey is when you begin it. Why not today?
God, motivate me to live a fuller, richer life.
Activity: Pull out your wish list. Choose one thing on your list that has been quietly waiting for the time to be right. Decide that the right time is now. Then begin.
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The Status Quo
Life as We Know It by Madisyn Taylor
Our lives can sometimes become status quo and that is ok as long as we aren't keeping it that way on purpose.
When our lives are going well, and sometimes even when they aren’t, we may find ourselves feeling very attached to the status quo of our existence--life as we know it. It is a very human tendency to resist change as though it were possible to simply decide not to do it, or have it in our lives. But change will come and the status quo will go, sooner or later, with our consent or without it. We may find at the end of the day that we feel considerably more empowered when we find the courage to ally ourselves with the universal force of change, rather than working against it.
Of course, the answer is not to go about changing things at random, without regard to whether they are working or not. There is a time and place for stability and the preservation of what has been gained over time. In fact, the ability to stabilize and preserve what is serving us is part of what helps us to survive and thrive. The problem comes when we become more attached to preserving the status quo than to honoring the universal givens of growth and change. For example, if we allow a situation we are in to remain stagnant simply because we are comfortable, it may be time for us to summon up the courage to challenge the status quo.
This may be painful at times, or surprisingly liberating, and it will most likely be a little of both. Underneath the discomfort, we will probably find excitement and energy as we take the risk of unblocking the natural flow of energy in our lives. It is like dismantling a dam inside ourselves, because most of the work involves clearing our own inner obstacles so that the river of our life can flow unobstructed. Once we remove the obstacles, we can simply go with the flow, trusting the changes that follow. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When newcomers to The Program experience the first startling feeling that they’re truly among friends, they also wonder — with almost a sense of terror — if the feeling is real. Will it last? Those of us who’ve been in The Program a few years can assure any newcomer at a meeting that it is very real indeed, and that it does last. It’s not just another false start, not just a temporary burst of gladness to be followed, inevitably, by shattering disappointment. Am I convinced that I can have a genuine and enduring recovery from the loneliness of my addiction?
Today I Pray
Please, God, let me not be held back by my fear of recurring loneliness. May I know that the openness which warms me in this group will not suddenly close up and leave me out. May I be patient with my fear, which is swollen with past disappointments and losses. may I know that the fellowship of the group will, in time, convince me that loneliness is never incurable.
Today I Will Remember
Loneliness is curable.
**************************************************
One More Day
Prayer, crystallized in words, assigns a permanent wave-length on which the dialogue has to be continued.
- Dag Hammarskjold
Many of us have all but forgotten how to pray. We don’t mean to avoid prayer — it just happens. Instead of prayer, we look to ourselves for answers or to others for our well-being. Our spiritual lives have become stagnant.
The reality of illness has, for many of us, underscored the limited power we have over some areas of our lives. We have no power over diagnoses, prognoses, remissions, or side-effects of medications. Whether out of anger, pain, depression, or hopelessness, a need arises to find balance in a world suddenly gone crazy. We may then trun to a Power greater than ourselves to provide the comfort we so desperately need. We pray; we meditate. We find peace.
I don’t have to carry my burdens alone.
************************************
Food For Thought
Thinking Thin
Our mental attitude has much to do with our physical reality. "As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is." If we think in terms of being thin, it is easier to adjust our appetite to the smaller amount of food, which we require. In the past, we may have been eating enough for two people. Large numbers of us in OA have lost the equivalent weight of at least one whole person.
By using our imagination to picture ourselves as thin, active, and healthy, we help our bodies adjust to the new image. Our old, fat self may want more to eat, but the thin person we are becoming does not need more. The fat self may grumble at leaving a comfortable chair to go out for a walk or at climbing a flight of stairs instead of taking the elevator. A sharp mental image of a new, thin self helps provide the necessary motivation to get up and go.
God does not intend us to be distorted and encumbered with excess weight. He will help us see the person we are meant to be.
May I become the person You intend.
*****************************************
One Day At A Time
OPPORTUNITY
"In the middle of difficulty, lies opportunity."
Albert Einstein
Pain, struggle, and difficulty can be catalysts for changes in me. If I am having so much difficulty living the way I do, then surely my current means of coping and survival are not working. The insanity of it all was that in spite of all the proof I saw that those methods did not work, I continued to live the same way -- and suffer the same difficulties and struggles -- for many years. Then opportunity for change knocked on my door. I found TRG online.
The Recovery Group program has shown me that there are much better ways to deal with life than to stuff myself with food, fear, resentments, and anger. The methods and tools I have been given here work. My defects still rear their ugly heads, but I no longer live focused on -- or living in -- those defects. Now I direct my thinking to program material, prayer and program works. What a gift that has been! Joy is mine for today ~ for the taking!
When I find that what I am doing today is not working, what do I need to do? As a COE with no recovery I would have kept doing what wasn't working. That made no sense, but that's what I did. Now when I struggle with the food, I look at my thinking, 'cause thinking affects how I feel and feelings impact my compulsions. When the thinking starts to spiral downward I know I need to act. I need to read program material, contact a program person, pray and meditate, and/or do program service. I need to use the tools to get me focused back on recovery.
One day at a time...
I will be mindful of my thinking, and when negative or self-pitying thoughts arise, I will remember that I have the opportunity now to redirect and refocus anew on recovery.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
It relieved me somewhat to learn that in alcoholics the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to combating liquor, though it often remains strong in other respects. My incredible behavior in the face of a desperate desire to stop was explained. Understanding myself now, I fared forth in high hope. For three or four months the goose hung high. I went to town regularly and even made a little money. Surely this was the answer - self-knowledge.
But it was not, for the frightful day came when I drank once more. The curve of my declining moral and bodily health fell off like a ski-jump. After a time I returned to the hospital. This was the finish, the curtain, it seemed to me. My weary and despairing wife was informed that it would all end with heart failure during delirium tremens, or I would develop a wet brain, perhaps within a year. She would soon have to give me over to the undertaker or the asylum. - Pg. 7 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Is yesterday something that you worry about? Some yesterday? Whatever its mistakes, faults, blunders, or pains it has passed forever beyond your control. You cannot erase a single word or deed from your 'yesterdays.' On this road of recovery, we find it best to simply worry about right now.
Right now I am safe. Right now I am abstinent. Right now I am not harming myself. Right now I am relying on a Power Greater then myself to see me through this.
My Interaction with My World
I elicit a particular response from the world about how it sees me based on what I'm putting out there. I get a response, then I take in that information, process it well or badly, consciously or unconsciously, and it becomes a part of me. A part of my wiring psychologically, emotionally and spiritually. Who I am is a product of who I am. Those of us who had great starts in life are lucky, but all of us can do a lot about who we are, and forgiveness is one of those tools that has the power to transform our lives. There's much more to it than meets the eye, more work and more benefit.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
There will be times when people around you act like absolute jerks. If they are a jerk and the problem is with them, time will reveal it. Likewise, if you are the jerk and the problem is with you, time will reveal it. Do the next right thing and give time time.
Today, I don't let assholes rent space in my head.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
How we treat others is a consequence of the depth of our own spirituality.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I do not need to know anything about this day beyond this moment. This moment is perfect just as it is and I can handle anything in this moment. My Higher Power gives me all the strength I need today to handle whatever comes up in this moment.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I had nowhere else to go. I crept into the meeting I'd gone to before I'd decided I could still drink. I'd hit rock-bottom. Drinking and sobriety were both unbearable. I sat in the back row, ready to flee again. There was an odd man who I'd seen before at the meeting. He never mixed with anyone. He'd spotted me come in and after a time he came and sat closer than I'd seen him sit next to anyone - still a few rows away, but close for him. Anyway, I stayed through to the end of the meeting. I didn't hear much, I sat there, lost, not knowing what to do, where to go. I noticed this man had moved closer, four or five seats away, and he said: 'Are you all right?' I said, ' It hurts.' And he said; 'I know.' Then he moved off. That's all I could have taken then. And that's all it took: One alcoholic reaching out the hand of AA to another. No matter how shaky either hand was. - Anonymous woman. Australia.
bluidkiti
05-16-2021, 02:02 AM
May 24
Daily Reflections
"HAPPY, JOYOUS AND FREE"
We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. We cannot
subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once
was just that for many of us. But it is clear that we made our own
misery. God didn't do it. Avoid then, the deliberate manufacture of
misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an opportunity
to demonstrate His omnipotence.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 133
For years I believed in a punishing God and blamed Him for my
misery. I have learned that I must lay down the "weapons" of self in
order to pick up the "tools" of the A.A. program. I do not struggle
with the program because it is a gift and I have never struggled when
receiving a gift. If I sometimes keep on struggling, it is because I'm still
hanging onto my old ideas and ". . . the results are nil."
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In twelfth-step work, the third thing is conviction. Prospects must be
convinced that they honestly want to stop drinking. They must see and
admit that their life is unmanageable. They must face the fact that
they must do something about their drinking. They must be absolutely
honest with themselves and face themselves as they really are. They
must be convinced that they must give up drinking and they must see
that their whole life depends on this conviction. Do I care enough
about other alcoholics to help them reach this conviction?
Meditation For The Day
There is no limit to what you can accomplish in helping others. Keep
that thought always. Never relinquish any work or give up the thought
of any accomplishment because it seems beyond your power. God will
help you in all good work. Only give it up if you feel that it's not God's
will for you. In helping others, think of the tiny seed under the dark,
hard ground. There is no certainty that, when it has forced its way up
to the surface, sunlight and warmth will greet it. Often a task seems
beyond your power, but there is no limit to what you can accomplish
with God's help.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may never become discouraged in helping others. I pray
that I may always rely on the power of God to help me.
************************************************** *********
As Bill Sees It
Blind Trust?, p. 144
"Most surely, there can be no trust where there is no love, nor can
there be real love where distrust holds its malign sway.
"But does trust require that we be blind to each other people's
motives or indeed, to our own? Not at all; this would be folly. Most
certainly, we should assess the capacity for harm as well as the
capability for good in every person that we would trust. Such a
private inventory can reveal the degree of confidence we should
extend in any given situation.
"However, this inventory needs to be taken in a spirit of
understanding and love. Nothing can so much bias our judgment as
the negative emotions of suspicion, jealously, or anger.
"Having vested our confidence in another person, we ought to let him
know of our full support. Because of this, more often than not he will
respond magnificently, and far beyond our first expectations."
Letter, 1966
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Walk in Dry Places
Guidance and Power in making Decisions.
Higher power
The Twelve Step movement grews out of an earlier society that emphasized taking "quiet times" and seeking continous guidance in a group setting. While this isn't usually practiced by 12 step groups anymore, such exercises are still recommended for individuals.
Our needs in seeking guidance are twofold; FIRST, we msut reach a belief that our higher power is always available to supply the guidance and power we need. SECOND, we must take care to set aside personal opinions and prejudices while letting real guidance come through. We can easily fall into serious error by assuming that our own impulses and prejudices are "the will of God" for ourselves and others.
How can we identify real guidance when it comes? Usually, we have a sense of peace and rightness about a God-inspired decision. This will be accompanied by a confidence that the correct way will bed shown to us, perhaps a step at a time. The right decision will also be morally correct, involving no harm to others.
I'll seek the guidance of my Higher power in all things today, knowing that I have within myself the capacity to heed such guidance and follow it.
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Keep It Simple
The way to love anything is to realize it might be lost. ---G.K. Chesterton
Every day we take so much for granted. But we can count certain blessings: a roof over our head, food, clothing, family, and friends, freedom, a Higher Power we trust. These things are special.
Thinking about them wakes up our happiness. Our recovery program shows us how happy. we just have to remember to do what it tells us!
Step Ten helps us wake up our happiness. Each evening, as we think about our day, we can give thanks for the things we love: our recovery, our health, and the special people in our lives. If we spend part of our day thinking about these important areas, we wont lose them.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me make the most of my blessings today.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll tell five people I love that I'm glad to have them in my life. And I'll tell each of them one reason why.
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Each Day a New Beginning
It's ironic, but until you can free those final monsters within the jungle of yourself, your life, your soul is up for grabs. --Rona Barrett
We all have monsters. Maybe it's depression over the past or present circumstances, or resentment about another's behavior, or fear of new situations. Maybe it's jealousy of other women. The more attention we give the monsters, the more powerful they get. The harder we try to resist the jealousy or depression or fear, the greater it becomes.
The program offers us the way to let go. And we find the way through one another. When we share ourselves fully with one another, share our monsters with one another, they no longer dominate us. They seek the dark recesses of our minds, and when we shine the light on them, they recoil. The program offers us an eternal light.
I will let the program shine its light in my life today. My monsters will flee for the day.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Perhaps at this point we got a divorce and took the children home to father and mother. Then we were severely criticized by our husband’s parents for desertion. Usually we did not leave. We stayed on and on. We finally sought employment ourselves as destitution faced us and our families.
p. 106
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
"But, of course," he continued, "eventually the alcoholic loses all of his capacities as his disease gets progressively worse, and this is a tragedy that is painful to watch: the disintegration of a sound mind and body."
p. 272
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
Highlighting the wisdom of A.A.'s single purpose, a member tells this story:
"Restless one day, I felt I'd better do some Twelfth Step work. Maybe I should take out some insurance against a slip. But first I'd have to find a drunk to work on.
"So I hopped the subway to Towns Hospital, where I asked Dr. Silkworth if he had a prospect. `Nothing too promising,' the little doc said. `There's just one chap on the third floor who might be a possibility. But he's an awfully tough Irishman. I never saw a man so obstinate. He shouts that if his partner would treat him better, and his wife would leave him alone, he'd soon solve his alcohol problem. He's had a bad case of D.T.'s, he's pretty foggy, and he's very suspicious of everybody. Doesn't sound too good, does it? But working with him may do something for you, so why don't you have a go at it?'
pp. 151-152
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"Humility leads to strength and not to weakness. It is the highest form
of self-respect to admit mistakes and to make amends for them."
--John (Jay) McCloy
I am responsible. Although I may not be able to prevent the worst
from happening, I am responsible for my attitude toward the inevitable
misfortunes that darken life. Bad things do happen; how I respond to
them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to
sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can
choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I
have - life itself.
--Walter Anderson
Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for
responsibility.
--Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness
without action."
--Benjamin Disraeli
Appreciate the time that you have been given. Don't procrastinate,
because you just may not get the chance to do something you have
been meaning to do.
--unknown
Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear,
too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for
those who love, time is eternity.
--Henry Van Dyke
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
IMMATURITY
"My mother loved children - she
would have given anything if I
had been one."
--Groucho Marx
For too many years I allowed myself to be treated as a child. I played
the child role in order to avoid responsibility. Part of my
people-pleasing was living as a thirty-year-old child! I was afraid to
say "no". Afraid to disappoint or hurt another's feelings. Afraid to tell
my parents how they were hurting me by their need to control my life.
God, when I think about it, I spent years feeling guilty and afraid.
Today I am willing to deal with this pain in my life; today I am willing
to talk about it. My biggest relief comes in knowing that I am not
alone. There are millions of us out there. The difference is I have a
program today that enables me to talk about it.
God, help me to be child-like without being childish. Help me to grow
into maturity with a smile.
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Pleasant words are as a honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to
the bones.
Proverbs 16:24
Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong;
for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil. For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.
Psalm 37:1-9
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Daily Inspiration
Do not be upset by events of the past, rather be upset by the time and energy you are devoting to them. Lord, help me to enjoy each moment by completely letting go of the past.
Appreciate every moment of life because even in your darkest moment God is with you. Lord, I know that when things become too difficult for me, You will take my burden and carry me. I am not afraid.
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NA Just For Today
Risking vulnerability
Page 150
"As we grow, we learn to overcome the tendency to run and hide from ourselves and our feelings."
Basic Text, p. 85
Rather than risk vulnerability, many of us have developed habits that keep others at a safe distance. These patterns of emotional isolation can give us the feeling we are hopelessly locked behind our masks. We used to take risks with our lives; now we can take risks with our feelings. Through sharing with other addicts, we learn that we are not unique; we do not make ourselves unduly vulnerable simply by letting others know who we are, for we are in good company. And by working the Twelve Steps of the NA program, we grow and change. We no longer want or need to hide our emerging selves. We are offered the opportunity to shed the emotional camouflage we developed to survive our active addiction.
By opening ourselves to others, we risk becoming vulnerable, but that risk is well worth the rewards. With the help of our sponsor and other recovering addicts, we learn how to express our feelings honestly and openly. In turn, we become nourished and encouraged by the unconditional love of our companions. As we practice spiritual principles, we find strength and freedom, both in ourselves and in those around us. We are set free to be ourselves and to enjoy the company of our fellow addicts.
Just for Today: I will openly and honestly share with another recovering addict. I will risk becoming vulnerable and celebrate my self and my friendship with other NA members. I will grow.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Spring does not ask an audience, but shapes each blossom perfectly, indifferent to applause. --Joan Walsh Anglund
In the spring each blossom brings its own shape, color, and fragrance. The lilacs come early to spread their lavender splash. Apple trees burst into white, cherry blossoms into pink, and each weaves its unique and pleasant perfume.
They don't bloom because someone told them to, or because they will receive anything in return. They bloom for the pure joy of blooming. They bloom because that is what they are here to do.
Each one of us blooms in our own time, with our own color and fragrance. Every one of us is a special and important blossom, and we are all part of the tree of life.
How will my day today help me grow?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Edith Bunker: I was just thinking. In all the years we been married, you never once said you was sorry.
Archie Bunker: Edith, I'll gladly say that I'm sorry - if I ever do anything wrong.
--Norman Lear
We can laugh at Archie because we see a part of ourselves in him. We have lived in a cloud of denial, blind to our faults. If we weren't actually blind to them, perhaps we just refused to admit them because we did not dare. Changing this pattern takes time and determination. We make progress in recovery when we stop focusing on what is wrong with others and start being accountable for ourselves. We grow when we are willing to amend our lives and accept forgiveness for our mistakes.
A feeling of self-respect flows into us when we stand up and say "I did something wrong." This statement also says, "I have the strength to face my responsibilities and repair my mistakes." It is surprisingly helpful to our self-esteem, and it improves our relationships.
Today, I will be accountable for my actions and will admit my mistakes.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
It's ironic, but until you can free those final monsters within the jungle of yourself, your life, your soul is up for grabs. --Rona Barrett
We all have monsters. Maybe it's depression over the past or present circumstances, or resentment about another's behavior, or fear of new situations. Maybe it's jealousy of other women. The more attention we give the monsters, the more powerful they get. The harder we try to resist the jealousy or depression or fear, the greater it becomes.
The program offers us the way to let go. And we find the way through one another. When we share ourselves fully with one another, share our monsters with one another, they no longer dominate us. They seek the dark recesses of our minds, and when we shine the light on them, they recoil. The program offers us an eternal light.
I will let the program shine its light in my life today. My monsters will flee for the day.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting the Cycles Flow
Life is cyclical, not static. Our relationships benefit when we allow them to follow their own natural cycles.
Like the tide ebbs and flows, so do the cycles in relationships. We have periods of closeness and periods of distance. We have times of coming together and times of separating to work on individual issues.
We have times of love and joy, and times of anger.
Sometimes, the dimensions of relationships change as we go through changes. Sometimes, life brings us new friends or a new loved one to teach us the next lesson.
That does not mean the old friend disappears forever. It means we have entered a new cycle.
We do not have to control the course of our relationships, whether these be friendships or love relationships. We do not have to satisfy our need to control by imposing a static form on relationships.
Let it flow. Be open to the cycles. Love will not disappear. The bond between friends will not sever. Things do not remain the same forever, especially when we are growing and changing at such a rapid pace.
Trust the flow. Take care of yourself, but be willing to let people go. Hanging on to them too tightly will make them disappear.
The old adage about love still holds true: If its meant to be, it will be. And if you love someone, let them go. If they come back to you, the love is yours.
Today, I accept the cyclical nature of life and relationships. I will strive to go with the flow. I will strive for harmony with my own needs and the needs of the other person.
Today I dare to believe in the beauty of love. Today I trust I am being led to love by love and my day will be full of love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Rituals Connect Us with Faith
I stopped in at the Franciscan monastery, a short visit to look around. I bought a keychain, returned to my car, than realized I had misplaced my keys. I went back inside and talked to the receptionist. Just then a short priest joined our conversation. He had a bald head encircled by a short fringe of hair and he wore a flowing black robe. “Let me show you what I do when I lose something,” he said. “I ask St. Anthony for help.”
The next moment, the priest was spinning in a circle, clapping his hands in a joyful prayer. “St. Anthony, St. Anthony, please look around. Something’s been lost and cannot be found.” He stopped, looked at me, then smiled. “Now you’ll find your keys,” he said. He was right. Within thirty seconds, we found the keys. They were on a counter in a place we had looked twice before. For some reason, we just hadn’t seen them.
But I found something more wonderful than my keys. I had witnessed a delightful man expressing pure, innocent joy for a ritual that helped him and others through the days.
What are the rituals that are important to you, that awaken joy, innocence, and faith in you? Do you allow yourself to use these rituals freely? What were the rituals you enjoyed as a child, the ones that brought you comfort? Do you remember them? Engage in these rituals. Use them freely. Share them with others, as the priest did with me.
Rituals connect us to faith. They’re faith in action. Rituals are reminders of our connection to God. They bring us back to God and ourselves.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to begin
I have a friend who is always planning to start a writing project “as soon as she gets organized.” She has read nearly every book, attended every seminar, and bought all the tapes on the subject. She has closets full of organizers, drawers stuffed with folders, and several related computer programs. There’s only one problem. Instead of starting, she hides behind a mask of “firsts.” “I’ll start writing, but first I’ve got to learn this program.” “I’ll listen to that tape, but first I’ve got to read this book.”
Are you hiding behind a mask of firsts? Is there always something that keeps you from beginning? Take off the mask. Start the project. Ask that special person for a date. Do that Fourth and Fifth Step. Stop making excuses. Eliminate them.
Learn to say when it’s time to begin.
God, please help me eliminate excuses from my life. Show me how full my life can be when I pursue my dreams.
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Feeling Overwhelmed
Breathing into Order by Madisyn Taylor
Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.
Sometimes we may feel like there is just too much we need to do. Feeling overwhelmed may make it seem like the universe is picking on us, but the opposite is true: we are only given what we can handle. Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.
The best place to start is to take a deep breath. As you do, remind yourself that the universe works in perfect order and therefore you can get everything done that needs to get done. As you exhale, release all the details that you have no control over. The universe with it‘s infinite organizing power will orchestrate the right outcome. Anytime stress begins to creep up, remember to breathe through it with these thoughts.
Then, make a list of everything you need to do. Note what needs to be done first, and mark the things others may be able to do for you or with you. Though we often think no one else can do it correctly or well, there are times when it is worth it to exhale, let go of our control, and ask for help from professionals or friends. With the remaining things that feel you must do yourself, take another breath and determine their true importance. Sometimes they are things we’d like to do, but aren’t really necessary. After taking these quick steps, you will find you have a plan laid out, freeing you from frenzied thoughts circling in your head. With calming deep breaths, you are now free to focus more fully on our priorities. Herbal teas or flower remedies along with wise choices about caffeine and food can help keep us from becoming frantic too. But with nothing further from us than our breath, we can breathe in our best intentions and let the rest go with an exhale. Keeping ourse! lves centered and breathing into and through life’s challenges helps us learn what we are truly capable of doing, and we will find we have the ability to rise to any occasion. Remember you aren’t being picked on, and you are never alone. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Getting over years of suspicion and other self-protective mechanisms can hardly be an overnight process. We’ve become thoroughly conditioned to feeling and acting misunderstood and unloved — whether we really were or not. Some of us may need time and practice to break out of our shell and the seemingly comfortable familiarity of solitude. Even though we begin to believe and know we’re no longer alone, we tend to sometimes feel and act in the old ways. Am I taking it easy? Am I learning to wear The Program and life like a loose garment?
Today I Pray
May I expect no sudden, total reversal of all my old traits. My sobriety is just a beginning. May I realize that the symptoms of my disease will wear off gradually. If I slip back, now and then, into my old self-pity bag or my grandiosity, may I not be discouraged, but grateful. At last, I can face myself honestly and not let my delusions get the best of me.
Today I Will Remember
Easy Does It.
**************************************************
One More Day
Quote: Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this — that you are dreadfully like other people.
– James Russell Lowell
Scientist have long known that all human bodies have essentially the same structure. In this day and age, one person’s heart — or even other organs — can be implanted into another human being’s body.
Other similarities come to mind as we live the day-by-day struggles of having a long-term medical condition. We share the frustrations, the unshed tears, pain, and hopelessness with all people whose state of health is forever altered. But we also share in joy, in pleasure, in the small and large successes we all can achieve as we move on with our lives. We are different, but we are also so very much the same.
Despite my physical limitations, I am more like all other people than I am different from them. Today, I will look for the similarities.
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Food For Thought
Self-Sabotage
There are some times when we seem bent on self-destruction. We may be disgruntled about the demands and responsibilities of the day and determined to punish ourselves for our inability to cope easily. Why we subvert our own best interests is often a mystery, but we all know the frustration and despair of not doing what we should do and doing what we should not do.
Often, we engage in self-sabotage when we are being emotional about a situation instead of viewing it rationally. We usually find that we have forgotten or refused to turn the problem over to our Higher Power. Frequently, we have allowed resentments to build up and cloud our perception.
Whether we turn to food and overeat or whether we indulge in other types of negative, destructive behavior and emotions, we are sabotaging ourselves. We are the ones who suffer the most from our destructiveness. No one else can disturb our serenity unless we permit them to do so.
May I remember to turn to You in times of distress.
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One Day At A Time
PERFECTION
"The thing that is really hard, and really amazing,
is giving up on being perfect and
beginning the work of becoming yourself."
Anna Quindlen
"Perfect"...to me that word sounds like: "Do it again. You didn't do it right." That's the message I get from the voices in my head. The messages of perfectionism tell me over and over that I did it wrong. It's a powerful weapon when you use it as a whip against yourself, just like negative messages when you look in a mirror. I have a choice every single moment of every single day to either pick up that whip and hurt myself, or to "get out of my own way" and be kind. I can choose to look in the mirror and be thankful, and to look at myself and feel love. It takes a lot of practice, but it is worth it.
If you love yourself more than you love anyone else, you can feel happiness again. You can create again. You can look at your shadow and say good things about it too! It's another beautiful you ~ unique and wonderfully made.
One day at a time...
I will celebrate the beauty of myself today and everyday.
~ Karen
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If you have been successful in solving your own domestic problems, tell the newcomer's family how that was accomplished. In this way you can set them on the right track without becoming critical of them. The story of how you and your wife settled your difficulties is worth any amount of criticism. - Pg. 100 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
It is our experience in recovery that a Power greater then ourselves places the answers before us that we need to hear when we need to hear them. Often we don't like the answers and ignore the reality of them. But we can face reality now, if we choose.
Please give me the strength to see this through to the next hour. Help me face the reality of recovery and not slip back to the insanity of using.
Staying with Myself
Today, I see that having my own life begins inside of me. It is not just a function of what I do, but the attitude with which I move through my day. Having my own life is about checking in with myself to see how I'm doing. It's wearing a sweater if I'm cold and taking a break if I'm tired. It's making sure that I'm having enough fun in my life, paying attention to what I enjoy doing, doing more of that and finding ways of reducing what doesn't feel good. Having a life is letting myself have my own unique likes and dislikes, and acting on them in constructive ways. It is not organizing my life so that it is good enough for everyone else, forgetting that it needs to be good enough for me as well. I occupy the center of my own life.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
You may not always know what is right but you sure know what is wrong. Anytime you have to give excuses for why you do what you do, it's wrong.
If I have to explain or excuse it, then I can do without it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
In a bar, we got sympathy--as long as our money lasted. In AA, we get understanding for nothing.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I dare to believe in the beauty of love. Today I trust I am being led to love by love and my day will be full of love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Change only happens when the pain of holding on is greater than the fear of letting go. - Unknown origin.
bluidkiti
05-16-2021, 02:03 AM
May 25
Daily Reflections
PROGRESSIVE GRATITUDE
Gratitude should go forward, rather than backward.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 29
I am very grateful that my Higher Power has given me a second
chance to live a worthwhile life. Through Alcoholics Anonymous, I
have been restored to sanity. The promises are being fulfilled in my
life. I am grateful to be free from the slavery of alcohol. I am grateful
for peace of mind and the opportunity to grow, but my gratitude should go
forward rather than backward. I cannot stay sober on yesterday's
meetings or past Twelfth-Step calls; I need to put my gratitude into
action today. Our co-founder said our gratitude can best be shown by
carrying the message to others. Without action, my gratitude is just a
pleasant emotion. I need to put it into action by working Step Twelve,
by carrying the message and practicing the principles in all my affairs.
I am grateful for the chance to carry the message today!
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In twelfth-step work, the third thing is conviction. Prospects must be
convinced that they honestly want to stop drinking. They must see and
admit that their life is unmanageable. They must face the fact that
they must do something about their drinking. They must be absolutely
honest with themselves and face themselves as they really are. They
must be convinced that they must give up drinking and they must see
that their whole life depends on this conviction. Do I care enough
about other alcoholics to help them reach this conviction?
Meditation For The Day
There is no limit to what you can accomplish in helping others. Keep
that thought always. Never relinquish any work or give up the thought
of any accomplishment because it seems beyond your power. God will help
you in all good work. Only give it up if you feel that it's not God's will
for you. In helping others, think of the tiny seed under the dark, hard ground.
There is no certainty that, when it has forced its way up to the
surface, sunlight and warmth will greet it. Often a task seems beyond
your power, but there is no limit to what you can accomplish with
God's help.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may never become discouraged in helping others. I pray
that I may always rely on the power of God to help me.
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As Bill Sees It
To Take Responsibility, p. 145
Learning how to live in the greatest peace, partnership, and
brotherhood with all men and women, of whatever description, is a
moving and fascinating adventure.
But every A.A. has found that he can make little headway in this new
adventure of living until he first backtracks and really makes an
accurate and unsparing survey of the human wreckage he has left in
his wake.
<< << << >> >> >>
The readiness to take the full consequences of our past acts, and to
take responsibility for the well-being of others at the same time, is
the very spirit of Step Nine.
12 & 12
1. p. 77
2. p. 87
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Walk in Dry Places
Forgetting past failures
Living today.
"You never do anything right!" Some of us carry this accusation deep in our minds, perhaps from childhood. We remember past mistakes and failures, sometimes dregging them up again when new failures occur.
When we do this, we unduly burden ourselves with a past that should be released and forgotten. The result of past mistakes was a feeling of inadequacy and helplessness that prolonged our sickness. IN those troubled days, we were trying to solve our problems inways that actually made the problems worse. On that path, there was no hope of a real solution.
Today our failure and mistakes are but signs that we are will human and still fall short of perfection. But now we can use failure to good advantage and even learn from it. Our best progress will come when we separate ourselves from the mistakes and failures of the past.
Today I will not believe that "I never did anything right!" I will go through the day knowing that I am capable and effective, and have the help of my higher power in everything I do.
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Keep It Simple
In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me.---Virginia Satir
Let's keep this in mind: each of us is special in our own way. Often, we're hard on ourselves because we're different.
Our Twelve Step groups pull our differences together. We listen and learn from our differences.
We learn to see that each one of us is different---and this is important. Our program and the Steps stay alive for us, because each new person brings a different way of seeing things. Let's celebrate our differences instead of trying to be alike.
Prayer for the Day: Today, is a day to celebrate that, in all of the world, there is only one me. Thank-you, Higher Power, and help me see clearly how special I am.
Action for the Day: I'll make a list of what makes me special. I'll share this with a friend or my sponsor and my Higher Power.
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Each Day a New Beginning
One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, once one knows the necessary ingredients of happiness--simple tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that I now feel certain. --George Sand
We are as happy as we make up our minds to be, so goes the saying. But happiness is the result of right actions. We prepare for it daily. We chart our course. Many of us have to first determine where we want to go before we can decide on the chart. We have perhaps passively floated along for years. But now the time is right to navigate, to move toward a goal.
We may have fears about moving ahead. We can be courageous, however. Strength is at hand, always, if we but ask for it. We can make a small beginning today. And every day, we can do at least one thing we need to do to bring us closer to our goal. Accomplishment, however small, nurtures good feelings. Happiness is the byproduct.
Today is wide open. I will decide on a course of action and move ahead. All around me help is available for the asking.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
We began to ask medical advice as the sprees got closer together. The alarming physical and mental symptoms, the deepening pall of remorse, depression and inferiority that settled down on our loved ones—these things terrified and distracted us. As animals on a treadmill, we have patiently and wearily climbed, falling back in exhaustion after each futile effort to reach solid ground. Most of us have entered the final stage with its commitment to health resorts, sanitariums, hospitals, and fails. Sometimes there were screaming delirium and insanity. Death was often near.
pp. 106-107
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
Then he told me there was a handful of people in Akron and New York who had worked out a technique for arresting their alcoholism. He asked me to read the book Alcoholics Anonymous, and then he wanted me talk with a man who was experiencing success with his own arrestment. This man could tell me more. I stayed up all night reading that book. For me it was a wonderful experience. It explained so much I had not understood about myself, and best of all, it promised recovery if I would do a few simple things and be willing to have the desire to drink removed. Here was hope. Maybe I could find my way out of this agonizing existence. Perhaps I could find freedom and peace, and be able to once again to call my soul my own.
pp. 272-273
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"I was soon sitting beside a big hulk of a man. Decidedly unfriendly, he stared at me out of eyes which were slits in his red and swollen face. I had to agree with the doctor - he certainly didn't look good. But I told him my own story. I explained what a wonderful Fellowship we had, how well we understood each other. I bore down hard on the hopelessness of the drunk's dilemma. I insisted that few drunks could ever get well on their own steam, but that in our groups we could do together what we could not do separately. He interrupted to scoff at this and asserted he'd fix his wife, his partner, and his alcoholism by himself. Sarcastically he asked, `How much does your scheme cost?'
"I was thankful I could tell him, `Nothing at all.'
p. 152
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"I'd never trade my worst day sober for my best day drunk."
--unknown
"If you do what you have always done, you'll get what you've always
gotten."
--Anon
He who learns, teaches.
--African Proverb
"You must get good at one of two things: sowing in the spring or
begging in the fall."
--Jim Rohn
"Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back."
--Don Herold
"We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege
and adventure to discover our own special light.
--Mary Dunbar
God bids me to do the right and loving thing.
--SweetyZee
" For every minute you are angry you lose 60 seconds of happiness"
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
God knows our hearts and wants better for us than we can dream.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
VARIETY
"The growth of the human mind is
still high adventure, in many ways
the highest adventure on earth."
--Norman Cousins
Today my life is an adventure. I am prepared for the unusual; I expect
the confusion of life; I revel in God's reflected difference within
creation: variety and the acceptance of variety is part of my joy in
living.
God is to be found in the "odd" things in life: The dance, relationships,
Charlie Chaplin, jogging, the pet dog and the sincere hug. The
adventure we find in life reflects our adventure in God.
Spirituality is seeing beyond the ordinary into the extraordinary: "The
Kingdom of God is within".
May I always seek to find You in the smallest and strangest places.
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Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give
you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am
gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your
souls. For My yoke is easy, and My load is light.
Matthew 11:28-30
For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:14-21
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Daily Inspiration
The best way to guide your own behavior is to make a commitment to always be a good example. Lord, may I be a reflection of Your love.
Should you find your energy lapsing, a sure remedy is to give someone a helping hand or a word of support and make their day. Lord, You are patient with me and loving. May I be the same with the people in my life.
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NA Just For Today
"Good" And "Bad" Feelings
"A lot happens in one day, both negative and positive. If we do not take time to appreciate both, perhaps we will miss something that will help us grow."
IP No. 8, "Just for Today"
Most of us seem to unconsciously judge what happens in our lives each day as good or bad, success or failure. We tend to feel happy about the "good" and angry, frustrated, or guilty about the "bad." Good and bad feelings, though, often have little to do with what's truly good or bad for us. We may learn more from our failures than our successes, especially if failure has come from taking a risk.
Attaching value judgments to our emotional reactions ties us to our old ways of thinking. We can change the way we think about the incidents of everyday life, viewing them as opportunities for growth, not as good or bad. We can search for lessons rather than assigning value. When we do this, we learn something from each day. Our daily Tenth Step is an excellent tool for evaluating the day's events and learning from both success and failure.
Just for today: I am offered an opportunity to apply the principles of recovery so that I will learn and grow. When I learn from life's events, I succeed.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Do we really know anybody? Who does not wear one face to hide another?
--Francis Marion
A woman in her fifties watched her mother in her eighties struggle against the wrinkles in her face and neck, trying to hide them, pretend they weren't there. She wanted her mother to accept that she was getting older but found her unwilling to listen.
Haven't we all run into this situation? We can learn so much just by remembering that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and others are entitled to decide how they want to behave. Often, we are just worried about ourselves, concerned, for instance, with our own ability to age gracefully. We don't need someone else to do it for us. We can take care of ourselves.
What do I worry about in another that I can take care of in myself?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
For him who confesses, shams are over and realities have begun; he has exteriorized his rottenness. If he has not actually got rid of it, he at least no longer smears it over with a hypocritical show of virtue. --William James
On the path we are following, confession is a frequent part of our experience. We admit our powerlessness; we make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves and admit our wrongs; we make amends to people we have harmed; and we continue with personal inventory, promptly admitting our wrongs. With each of these Steps we grow spiritually. By expressing on the outside what we privately know inside, we feel relief and gain self-respect.
Sometimes we have harbored and protected a real rottenness inside that needed to be exposed so we could change. Other times, what we felt was rottenness turned out - under the light of confession - to be only a human foible in need of airing. In either case, we grew stronger as we drew closer to reality and gave up the show of virtue by admitting our mistakes.
I will walk the path of recovery today by confessing my wrongs promptly.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
One is happy as a result of one's own efforts, once one knows the necessary ingredients of happiness--simple tastes, a certain degree of courage, self-denial to a point, love of work, and above all, a clear conscience. Happiness is no vague dream, of that I now feel certain. --George Sand
We are as happy as we make up our minds to be, so goes the saying. But happiness is the result of right actions. We prepare for it daily. We chart our course. Many of us have to first determine where we want to go before we can decide on the chart. We have perhaps passively floated along for years. But now the time is right to navigate, to move toward a goal.
We may have fears about moving ahead. We can be courageous, however. Strength is at hand, always, if we but ask for it. We can make a small beginning today. And every day, we can do at least one thing we need to do to bring us closer to our goal. Accomplishment, however small, nurtures good feelings. Happiness is the byproduct.
Today is wide open. I will decide on a course of action and move ahead. All around me help is available for the asking.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Loving Ourselves Unconditionally
Love yourself into health and a good life of your own.
Love yourself into relationships that work for you and the other person. Love yourself into peace, happiness, joy, success, and contentment.
Love yourself into all that you always wanted. We can stop treating ourselves the way others treated us, if they behaved in a less than healthy, desirable way. If we have learned to see ourselves critically, conditionally, and in a diminishing and punishing way, its time to stop. Other people treated us that way, but its even worse to treat ourselves that way now.
Loving ourselves may seem foreign, even foolish at times. People may accuse us of being selfish. We don't have to believe them.
People who love themselves are truly able to love others and let others love them. People who love themselves and hold themselves in high esteem are those who give the most, contribute the most, and love the most.
How do we love ourselves? By forcing it at first. By faking it if necessary. By acting as if. By working as hard at loving and liking ourselves as we have at not liking ourselves.
Explore what it means to love yourself.
Do things for yourself that reflect compassionate, nurturing, self love.
Embrace and love all of yourself - past, present, and future. Forgive yourself quickly and as often as necessary. Encourage yourself. Tell yourself good things about yourself.
If we think and believe negative ideas, get them out in the open quickly and honestly, so we can replace those beliefs with better ones.
Pat yourself on the back when necessary. Discipline yourself when necessary. Ask for help, for time; ask for what you need.
Sometimes, give yourself treats. Do not treat yourself like a pack mule, always pushing and driving harder. Learn to be good to yourself. Choose behaviors with preferable consequences--treating yourself well is one.
Learn to stop your pain, even when that means making difficult decisions. Do not unnecessarily deprive yourself. Sometimes, give yourself what you want, just because you want it.
Stop explaining and justifying yourself. When you make mistakes, let them go. We learn, we grow, and we learn some more. And through it all, we love ourselves.
We work at it, and then work at it some more. One day we'll wake up, look in the mirror, and find that loving ourselves has become habitual. Were now living with a person who gives and receives love, because that person loves him or herself. Self-love will take hold and become a guiding force in our life.
Today, I will work at loving myself. I will work as hard at loving myself as I have at not liking myself. Help me let go of self-hate and behaviors that reflect not liking myself. Help me replace those with behaviors that reflect self-love. Today, God, help me hold myself in high self esteem. Help me know Im lovable and capable of giving and receiving love.
I celebrate myself today. I am alive. I am growing. I am willing to do all I am able to do to be the best of who I am. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Awaken to Your Heart’s Contentment
One day, you’ll awaken to discover your life is all you wanted and hoped it would be.
Oh, you’ll not find everything just the way your head said you wanted it. It might not be the way you planned. But you’ll awaken to your dreams– your dreams of joy, love, and peace. Your dream of freedom.
You’ll see beyond the illusions. You’ll transcend your old limiting beliefs. You’ll wake up and notice that your past is just as it needed to be. You’ll see where you are today is good. You’ll notice that you laugh a lot, cry a lot, smile a lot.
You’ll look at tomorrow with peace, faith, and hope– knowing that while you cannot control some of what life does, you have possibilities and powers in any circumstance life might bring. The sturggle you have lived with for so many years, the struggle in your heart, has disappeared. You’re secure, at peace with yourself and your place in this world.
One day, you’ll awaken to your heart’s contentment. Let that day be today.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to do that difficult thing
Sometimes, true windows of opportunity open in our lives. We get a chance to make that amend. The perfect time to end or resolve that relationship arises. It’s like a gift from God when that window opens up. All we need to do is gently step through. But sometimes, we need to help God open the window– especially when we’re working up the courage to do a difficult thing.
Maybe we’re waiting for just the right moment to end a relationship. Maybe we’re looking for an opportunity to make an amend, tell someone we’re sorry about something we’ve done that’s caused that person pain. Maybe we have a new project we’d like to begin. Sometimes, we can passively wait, and wait, and that window just seems painted shut and stuck.
Ask God to help open the window, but do your part,too. Make a decision that you’re going to do it– whatever it is. Then let go, but not too long. Remember your decision. Remember your commitment to opening that window. Don’t force it, but focus your attention. You may begin to feel the slightest crack in the energy, that opening you need. Or you may have to wiggle the window frame, push on it just the slightest bit, to crack it open yourself. Then you’ll see it. You’ll feel it move. There. It’s open.
Help God open the window in your life by deciding to do it.
God, help me remember that the time doesn’t always feel right. Help me honor my deepest urges to do what I must to take care of myself.
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The Benefits of Singing
Harmonizing with the Universe by Madisyn Taylor
The act of singing is one of the easiest ways of raising the vibration of your body as you harmonize with the universe.
Singing is an act of vibration. It takes music from the realm of the unformed-- whether that is in your mind or from that magical space of inspiration--and moves it from within to without. From the first breath singing moves the energy in a circular way inside your body. As the breath fills your lungs, it brushes against the second and third chakras—the centers of creation and honoring self and others. Instead of merely exhaling, pushing the air past the fourth and fifth chakras where heart charka and the center of will and intention reside, singing engages both the heart and mind. Sound vibrations from vocal chords resonate in the sinus cavities, filling the head with motion and sound while the brain lights up with the processing of the mathematics of music. This marriage of activities brings the third eye into play and opens the door for inspiration from the crown chakra before sending the sound out into the world.
Once the vibration begins, it is sustained with each note, moving throughout your body and the space around you. This can help you to harmonize your frequency with the world and with the divine. The use of the voice can bring about catharsis, a cleansing from the expression of emotion, which is why we feel better after singing certain types of songs. All of this occurs even if we are not conscious of what we are singing, but when we really connect with an intention, the power of the voice and music together are powerful tools in creation.
Even if you are not a singer by nature or talent, you are not left out. If you have a voice, it is your birthright to celebrate life with song. It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel you have a nice voice. Chanting or humming, singing solo or with others, your voice is yours to enjoy. Whether you sing along to the radio or use vocalization as part of your meditation time, singing and harmonizing are healing activities that bring your body’s vibrations into alignment with the universe. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we’re new in The Program, we’re novices at reaching out for friendship — or even accepting it when it’s offered. Sometimes we’re not quite sure how to do it or, indeed, whether it will actually work. Gradually, however, we become restored; we become teachable. We learn, for example, as Moliere wrote, “The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them.” Just for today, will I not show anyone that my feelings are hurt?
Today I Pray
May God help me to discover what true friendship is. In my new relationships, I pray that I may not be so eager for approval that I will let myself be dishonest — through flattery, half-truths, false cheeriness, protective white lies.
Today I Will Remember
A friend is honest.
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One More Day
Much of your pain is self-chosen. It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
– Kahlil Gibran
We rarely, if ever, thing of grief in terms of loss of good health, yet each of us moves through the grieving process. We have a tendency to drive away those who are closest to us — those who are willing to share our pain — because we are unsure of how to handle our crisis.
The period of time in which we grieve leaves us emotionally raw, open, and vulnerable. We may refuse help because of stubborn pride, totally unaware that the people who care about us are in pain and need to share as well. Fortunately grief passes, and while we will never be the same, we do heal.
Loss of good health is new to me, and I must learn how to be gracious to those who care about me.
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Food For Thought
Delayed Gratification
One of the advantages of maturity is the ability to delay gratification of desires and needs. It is this ability, which makes possible the achievement of long-range goals and plans. We compulsive overeaters have permitted childish demands for immediate satisfaction to drive us into addictive habits. We still have some emotional growing up to do.
When we come to the OA program, we accept a reasonable plan for the gratification of our appetite and hunger. We know that we will eat three times a day, and we choose our food. As our appetite adjusts to eating smaller amounts less frequently, we may experience some discomfort. As maturing individuals, we can accept this discomfort in the interest of a healthier, more attractive body and a saner, more peaceful mind. Instead of having to have what we want now, this minute, we are able to wait until the appropriate time.
Working the Steps makes us aware of the emotional growing we need to do in order to have more satisfying relationships with other people. Here, too, we often have to delay immediate satisfaction in order to achieve larger, more important goals.
I pray for emotional and spiritual maturity.
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One Day At A Time
SHARING
”What most of us want is to be heard, to communicate.”
Dory Previn
When I am privileged to be involved in a meeting, hear sharing and have the opportunity to share, magic happens. For me, it is the end of isolation, the times of being alone with my mind and my thoughts that run away with me as long as they are stewing inside without me allowing myself to give them expression. That is why sharing is so important. If I receive constantly without giving, I stagnate. If I give consistently without taking the time to take in and be helped, I go bankrupt.
I need to share and listen for the God of my understanding in others' voices. I often refer to others who share as "God with skin on." I also need to share with others. For me, sharing is a type of prayer, talking to my Higher Power from my heart with others listening in on our conversation! That way I am heard by my HP and those at the meeting I am attending. That is the true magic of the program.
One day at a time...
I will reach out to others by sharing in meetings and allowing others to bless me with their sharing.
~ Carolyn H.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, IF WE HAVE A LEGITIMATE REASON FOR BEING THERE. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn't.
You will note that we made an important qualification. Therefore, ask yourself on each occasion, 'Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?' If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead! - Pgs. 101-102 - Working With Others
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
When there is no way to get away from us, when we can't get high enough to turn off the pain anymore, when we are worried and confused, then maybe it is time to try another way.
Right now I surrender to another way. Right now I will not get high and will walk this new road.
Fear
Today, I allow myself to experience my fears as fears, and not dictate or color my life circumstances because of them. They are real, and it is understandable that I have them. Healing mobilizes my deep fears, and they come up more intensely than ever. This is a part of my process of growth, and growth is not neat and tidy. When I am very afraid, I will comfort myself or seek comfort from someone else. I will understand that I am afraid and that even though I fear the worst, the worst will not necessarily happen. My feelings feel very powerful inside me, particularly when they have been repressed and are surfacing after many years, but they are not facts. I can survive my fears and understand that they will pass.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
One thing recovery teaches us, is that you can keep going long after you think you can't. This is because you are stronger than you think. You have the accumulated strength of millions of clean and sober Twelve-Step members to bolster you.
I keep on keep'n on; I keep on trudging.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Criticism and finding fault are not spiritual gifts.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I celebrate myself today. I am alive. I am growing. I am willing to do all I am able to do to be the best of who I am.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I agree with the first speaker in that any answer you may want may be in the Big Book but sometimes the book may send you outside of AA to get the things you need to survive here. - Bob E.
bluidkiti
05-16-2021, 02:03 AM
May 26
Daily Reflections
TURNING NEGATIVE TO POSITIVE
Our spiritual and emotional growth in A.A. does not depend
so deeply upon success as it does upon our failures and
setbacks. If you will bear this in mind. I think that your
slip will have the effect of kicking you upstairs, instead
of down.
AS BILL SEES IT , p. 184
In keeping with the pain and adversity which our founders
encountered and overcame in establishing A.A., Bill W.
sent us a clear message: a relapse can provide a positive
experience toward abstinence and a lifetime of recovery.
A relapse brings truth to what we hear repeatedly in
meetings - "Don't take that first drink!" It reinforces
the belief in the progressive nature of the disease, and
it drives home the need for, and beauty of, humility in
our spiritual program. Simple truths come in complicated
ways to me when I become ego driven.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In twelfth-step work, the fourth thing is conversion.
Conversion means change. Prospects must learn to change
their way of thinking. Until now, everything they've done
has been connected with drinking. Now they must face a new
kind of life, without liquor. They must see and admit that
they cannot overcome drinking by their own willpower, so
they must turn to a Higher Power for help. They must start
each day by asking this Higher Power for the strength to
stay sober. This conversion to belief in a Higher Power
comes gradually, as they try it and find that it works. Do
I care enough about other alcoholics to help them to make
this conversion?
Meditation For The Day
Discipline of yourself is absolutely necessary before the
power of God is given to you. When you see others manifesting
the power of God, you probably have not seen the discipline
that went before. They made themselves ready. All your life
is a preparation for more good to be accomplished when God
knows that you are ready for it. So keep disciplining yourself
in the spiritual life every day. Learn so much of the spiritual
laws that your life cannot again be a failure. Others will see
the outward manifestation of the inward discipline in your
daily living.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may manifest God's power in my daily living.
I pray that I may discipline myself so as to be ready to
meet every opportunity.
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As Bill Sees It
"Do as I Do . . .", p. 146
Perhaps more often than we think, we make no contact at depth with
alcoholics who are suffering the dilemma of no faith.
Certainly none are more sensitive to spiritual cocksureness, pride,
and aggression than they are. I'm sure this is something we too often
forget.
In A.A.'s first years, I all but ruined the whole undertaking with this
sort of unconscious arrogance, God as I understood Him had to be for
everybody. Sometimes my aggression was subtle and sometimes it
was crude. But either way it was damaging--perhaps fatally so--to
numbers of nonbelievers.
Of course this sort of thing isn't confined to Twelfth Step work. It is
very apt to leak out into our relations with everybody. Even now, I
catch myself chanting that same old barrier-building refrain: "Do as
I do, believe as I do--or else!
Grapevine, April 1961
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Walk in Dry Places
Today's problem_____ Orderly living
Facing a vexing or even threatening problem, we sometimes feel a sense of hopefulness or futility. "How will I ever get through this situation?" we think.
The truth is we have probably worked our way through many situations much like today's problem. It is a wonder, for example, that most of us survived the crises brought on by our compulsion. We will certainly be able to work through or around today's problem.
The Twelve step program is a plan for mastering the problems of life. As we apply its principles in all of our affairs, we find improvements beginning to appear. We also can find the confidence and fortitude that we've always needed.
Knowing that my Higher power is in the midst of the situation, I'll face today's problem with the assurance of an outcome that will be for my highest good.
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Keep It Simple
When I look at the future, it's so bright, it burns my eyes.---Oprah Winfrey
During our illness, it was as if our spirit lived in a deep, dark cave. Our spirit became gloomy, cold, and lonely. Our spirit didn't know how to get out of the cave. We were dying.
Recovery brings us into the sunlight. At first, we can't see a thing---it's too bright! The world stretches around us---it's so big! There are so many way to go! We don't know what to do.
But our eyes get used to the light, and we feel the warm rays of the sun. We see we aren't alone anymore. We relax. We know our spirit is in a better place---a place where we can live!
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me feel at home in the sunlight of my new life.
Action for the Day: Addiction made my world so small. It made my future so dark. Today, I'll list three new choices I want to make to better my life.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn, to reconceive ourselves as individuals, to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow and to fulfill ourselves more completely. --Nena O'Neill
Before choosing to recover, most of us lived through crisis after crisis. Many days we sought the oblivion of alcohol and drugs rather than face fears that ate away at us. It probably wasn't possible for most of us to realize that a crisis was a tool for growth.
Even today, even in our recovery program, even though the clouds are clearing and we are feeling better about ourselves, a crisis may overwhelm us for a time. We do find help for it, though. We can breathe deeply, look to our higher power, listen for the messages that are coming through from our friends. And we can choose among the many options for the right action to take at this time.
Life is a series of lessons. Crises can be seen as the homework. They aren't there to defeat us but to help us grow--to graduate us into the next stage of life.
Today, I will look for my lessons and feel exhilarated by the growth that is guaranteed.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Under these conditions we naturally make mistakes. Some of them rose out of ignorance of alcoholism. Sometimes we sensed dimly that we were dealing with sick men. Had we fully understood the nature of the alcoholic illness, we might have behaved differently.
p. 107
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
The next day I received a visit from Mr. T., a recovered alcoholic. I don't know what sort of person I was expecting, but I was very agreeably surprised to find Mr. T. a poised, intelligent, well-groomed, and mannered gentleman. I was immediately impressed with his graciousness and charm. He put me at ease with his first few words. Looking at him, I found it hard to believe he had ever been as I was then.
p. 273
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"His next question: `What are you getting out of it?' "Of course, my answer was `My own sobriety and a mighty happy life.' "Still dubious, he demanded, `Do you really mean the only reason you are here is to try and help me and to help yourself?'
"`Yes,' I said. `That's absolutely all there is to it. There's no angle.'
p. 152
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Choose to make a life, rather than a living... There is no need to
recriminate yourself. Simply notice what you've been choosing and
choose again!
--unknown
As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in
his way.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Knowledge of 'the answers' never made anyone relapse. It was
failing to practice 'the answers' known."
--Anonymous
Today is the most important day I have lived.
--SweetyZee
God, help me be clear with you and myself about what I really want.
Then, help me let go of my intentions and surrender to your plan.
--Melody Beattie
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SPACE
"That's one small step for man,
one giant leap for mankind."
--Neil A. Armstrong
Man is able to do such wonderful things in this world. There is no end
to what man can achieve when he behaves responsibly and honestly,
working together with others to discover more about himself and the
universe. God has truly made man in His own image with all the power
and creativity that that implies.
The danger that forever surrounds man is greed, pride and the misuse
of "power".
As a recovering alcoholic I understand this only too well. I wanted to
be out in front, and ego made me arrogant and selfish. If this is true
for me and other human beings, it is also true for governments,
countries and alliances. Countries don't make wars, people do;
countries don't have achievements, people do - and this universe must
be seen as belonging to everyone or it will belong to no one!
Let us learn to enjoy and share Your garden and not destroy it.
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Come near to God and he will come near to you.
James 4:8a
Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock
eternal.
Isaiah 26:4
We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust
in him. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God
lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect.
So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face
him with confidence because we are like Christ here in this
world. Such love has no fear because perfect love expels all
fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of judgment, and this shows
that his love has not been perfected in us. We love each other
as a result of his loving us first.
1 John 4: 16-19
"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him."
Psalm 62:5
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Daily Inspiration
Avoid becoming defensive and possibly causing conflict by taking a moment to think before you respond. Lord, help me to believe in myself strongly so that I am able to turn down invitations that make me feel bad.
God's plans for you are beyond your imagination. Lord, may I not limit myself to my past experiences, but be willing to accept new opportunities and challenges into my life.
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NA Just For Today
The Power In The Group
"Our understanding of a Higher Power is up to us.... We can call it the group, the program, or we can call it God."
Basic Text, p. 24
Many of us have a hard time with the idea of a Higher Power until we fully accept the depth of our own powerlessness over addiction. Once we do, most of us are at least willing to consider seeking the help of some Power greater than our disease. The first practical exposure many of us have to that kind of Power is in the NA group. Perhaps that's where we should start in developing our own understanding of God.
One evidence of the Power in the group is the unconditional love shown when NA members help one another without expectation of reward. The group's collective experience in recovery is itself a Power greater than our own, for the group has practical knowledge of what works and what doesn't. And the fact that addicts keep coming to NA meetings, day after day, is a demonstration of the presence of a Higher Power, some attractive, caring force at work that helps addicts stay clean and grow.
All these things are evidence of a Power that can be found in NA groups. When we look around with an open mind, each of us will be able to identify other signs of that Power. It doesn't matter if we call it God, a Higher Power, or anything else — just as long as we find a way to incorporate that Power into our daily lives.
Just for today: I will open my eyes and my mind to signs of a Power that exists in my NA group. I will call upon that Power to help me stay clean.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
An oak and a reed were arguing about their strength. When a strong wind came up, the reed avoided being uprooted by bending and leaning with the gusts of wind. But the oak stood firm and was torn up by the roots. --Aesop
Within each of us, as in the reed and the oak, is a single characteristic which is both our strongest and weakest trait. The bending which keeps the reed alive makes it weak, we might think. Some of us see both sides of every argument and are good team players, fair judges, and compassionate friends. But like the reed--always bending to the needs of others--we may never know what we want or who we are.
Some of us believe we are like the oak: strong and tough and successful in the face of most difficulty. But we may never learn to accept flaws in ourselves.
We are wise to remember that no trait is strong or weak, but we make it so by how we use it. We can use our strength to stand straight in the face of hardship, and we can use our strength to bend.
What is my strongest and weakest trait?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. --Antoine de Saint Exupery
Images cost nothing and can be so enriching. Every man has some form of rock pile in his life. One has a problem within a relationship, another is burdened with the daily routine of living, someone else has a perplexing job, and another has too much time on his hands.
We can open ourselves to images of what might be. Let us dream of other possibilities. We know it takes many years to build a cathedral, but each cathedral began as an image in someone's mind. What would we like to grow toward in our relationships? What can we do within ourselves today to carry us in that direction? Do we envision ourselves as successful in our work? What small steps will carry us toward the visions we cherish?
Today, I am grateful for my imagination. I will be open to having faith in possibilities.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn, to reconceive ourselves as individuals, to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow and to fulfill ourselves more completely. --Nena O'Neill
Before choosing to recover, most of us lived through crisis after crisis. Many days we sought the oblivion of alcohol and drugs rather than face fears that ate away at us. It probably wasn't possible for most of us to realize that a crisis was a tool for growth.
Even today, even in our recovery program, even though the clouds are clearing and we are feeling better about ourselves, a crisis may overwhelm us for a time. We do find help for it, though. We can breathe deeply, look to our higher power, listen for the messages that are coming through from our friends. And we can choose among the many options for the right action to take at this time.
Life is a series of lessons. Crises can be seen as the homework. They aren't there to defeat us but to help us grow--to graduate us into the next stage of life.
Today, I will look for my lessons and feel exhilarated by the growth that is guaranteed.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Gossip
Intimacy is that warm gift of feeling connected to others and enjoying our connection to them.
As we grow in recovery, we find that gift in many, sometimes surprising places. We may discover we've developed intimate relationships with people at work, with friends, with people in our support groups - sometimes with family members. Many of us are discovering intimacy in a special love relationship.
Intimacy is not sex, although sex can be intimate. Intimacy means mutually honest, warm, caring, safe relationships - relationships where the other person can be who he or she is and we can be who we are - and both people are valued.
Sometimes there are conflicts. Conflict is inevitable. Sometimes there are troublesome feelings to work through. Sometimes the boundaries or parameters of relationships change. But there is a bond - one of love and trust.
There are many blocks to intimacy and intimate relationships. Addictions and abuse block intimacy. Unresolved family of origin issues prevents intimacy. Controlling blocks intimacy. Off balance relationships, where there is too great a discrepancy in power, prevent intimacy. Caretaking can block intimacy. Nagging, withdrawing, and shutting down can hurt intimacy.
So can a simple behavior like gossip - for example, gossiping about another for motives of diminishing him or her in order to build up ourselves or to judge the person. To discuss another persons issues, shortcomings, or failures with someone else will have a predictable negative impact on the relationship.
We deserve to enjoy intimacy in as many of our relationships as possible. We deserve relationships that have not been sabotaged.
That does not mean we walk around with our heads in the clouds; it means we strive to keep our motives clean when it comes to discussing other people.
If we have a serious issue with someone, the best way to resolve it is to bring the issue to that person.
Direct, clean conversation clears the air and paves the way for intimacy, for good feelings about ourselves and our relationships with others.
Today, God, help me let go of my fear of intimacy. Help me strive to keep my communications with others clean and free from malicious gossip. Help me work toward intimacy in my relationships. Help me deal as directly as possible with my feelings.
Today I know that I am being guided and protected by a power greater than myself. I look forward to the unknown around the next bend in the road, the adventure over the next hill. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Awaken to Your Heart’s Contentment
One day, you’ll awaken to discover your life is all you wanted and hoped it would be.
Oh, you’ll not find everything just the way your head said you wanted it. It might not be the way you planned. But you’ll awaken to your dreams– your dreams of joy, love, and peace. Your dream of freedom.
You’ll see beyond the illusions. You’ll transcend your old limiting beliefs. You’ll wake up and notice that your past is just as it needed to be. You’ll see where you are today is good. You’ll notice that you laugh a lot, cry a lot, smile a lot.
You’ll look at tomorrow with peace, faith, and hope– knowing that while you cannot control some of what life does, you have possibilities and powers in any circumstance life might bring. The sturggle you have lived with for so many years, the struggle in your heart, has disappeared. You’re secure, at peace with yourself and your place in this world.
One day, you’ll awaken to your heart’s contentment. Let that day be today.
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More language of letting go
Go through the door that’s open
Sometimes, doors close in our lives. No matter how badly we want something, no matter how hard we’ve tried, no matter how much we want to pursue a particular course in our lives, the universe says no.
Many years ago, I wanted passionately and desperately to write a book on codependency. All twenty publishers I queried said the same thing. No. Some said it politely. Some said it by refusing to respond at all. That door just wouldn’t open up, no matter how hard I pushed.
One publisher came back with a counteroffer. “We don’t want the book on codependency,” the editor said. “But how about writing something for us on denial– why people do it, what part it plays in their lives, and how they become more aware and accepting of reality.”
I accepted the offer. I needed the work. But I wasn’t thrilled. I diligently did my research and wrote the manuscript. About a year later, that same publisher came back to me and asked me to write the book on codependency. I pulled out all my notes and research, including a large notebook in which I had jotted down all my ideas and questions on the subject. As I went through this notebool, I noticed a question written in such large letters it took up the entire page. “What about denial– what part does this play in codependency?” I had written on the next page: “Why do people do it, how can they stop? Help me understand,” I had written almost as a prayer.
I reused the denial concepts in my codependency book. I had long forgotten about my question to the universe. But God hadn’t.
Sometimes when doors shut, it’s because we’re not ready to walk through the one we want. Maybe the door that’s open in your life is the one you need to walk through. Go ahead, step in. Look around. It might not appear to be as exciting as the one you’d hoped would open, but maybe it’s exactly where you need to be.
Are you trying hard to push through a door that’s closed in your life? Make life easier on yourself. If you’ve diligently tried to open a door and it’s not budging, look around. Push on a few other doors. See which one opens. Then walk through that one.
God, help me trust your timing in my life. Help me understand that sometimes you know more about saying when than I do.
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Effort and Understanding
Having It Easy
Our lives are an exercise in facing challenges. We dream the grandest of dreams as youngsters only to discover that we must cultivate copious inner strength and determination in order to meet our goals. Our hard work does not always yield the results we expect. And it is when we find ourselves frustrated by the trials we face or unable to meet our own expectations that we are most apt to take notice of those individuals who appear to accomplish great feats effortlessly. Some people’s lives seem to magically fall into place. We can see the blessings they have received, the ease with which they have attained their desires, their unwavering confidence, and their wealth. But, because we can never see the story of their lives as a whole, it is important that we refrain from passing judgment or becoming envious.
Throughout our lives, we glimpse only the outer hull of others’ life experiences, so it’s tempting to presuppose that the abundance they enjoy is the result of luck rather than diligent effort. In a small number of cases, our assumptions may mirror reality. But very few people “have it easy.” Everyone must overcome difficulties and everyone has been granted a distinctive set of talents with which to do so. An individual who is highly gifted may nonetheless have to practice industriously and correct themselves repeatedly in order to cultivate their talents. Their myriad accomplishments are more likely than not the result of ongoing hard work and sacrifice. You, no doubt, have natural abilities that you have nurtured and your gifts may be the very reason you strive as tirelessly as you do. Yet others see only the outcome of your efforts and not the efforts themselves
Our intellects, our hearts, and our souls are constantly being tested by the universe. Life will create new challenges for you to face each time you prove yourself capable of overcoming the challenges of the past. What you deem difficult will always differ from that which others deem difficult. The tests you will be given will be as unique as you are. If you focus on doing the best you can and making use of the blessings you have been granted, the outcome of your efforts will be a joyous reflection of your dedication. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
I know today that I no longer have to proceed on my own. I’ve learned that it’s safer, more sensible and surer to move forward with friends who are going in the same direction as I. None of us need feel shame at using help, since we all help each other. It’s no more a sign of weakness to use help in recovering form my addiction than it is to use a crutch if I have a broken leg. To those who need it, and to those who see its usefulness, a crutch is a beautiful thing. Do I sometimes still refuse to accept easily-obtained assistance?
Today I Pray
God make me see that it is not a sign of weakness to ask for help, that the camaraderie of the group is what makes it work for each of us. Like a vaccine for diphtheria or polio, The Program and the strength of the group have proved themselves as preventives for slips and backsliding. Praise God for the tools of recovery.
Today I Will Remember
Help is as near as my telephone.
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One More Day
Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination, never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.
– Lord Chesterfield
Whether the memories were good or bad, we can never call back those moments that are already gone. Each special time should be savored as unique, never to be repeated again.
We may be uncertain of what our future holds, especially since we are not as well as before. By understanding the preciousness of each day, we can enhance the way we live our lives.
Each day is valuable and offers us one time opportunities to seize that moment — to make the very most of each chance to live.
Every moment is precious. I will make the most of each day.
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Food For Thought
Miracles
OA testifies to the occurrence of miracles in our daily lives. The physical, emotional, and spiritual changes that take place in those who sincerely practice the program are truly miraculous. Our stories are witness to the Power that is available to change lives and produce new people.
These miracles, however, usually happen slowly. It took most of us many years to blow our bodies and minds out of shape by eating too much of the wrong kind of food and by thinking too many of the wrong kinds of thoughts. The miracle of recovery does not happen overnight.
To try OA with the idea of shedding a few extra pounds in time for bathing suit season is to miss the mark. It was lack of self-knowledge and spiritual insight that got us out of shape, and only dedicated, long term work and commitment to the OA principles will produce the miraculous change we all desire.
Miracles do happen, but the ground needs to be carefully prepared and the new growth nurtured daily.
May I be willing to prepare myself for Your miracle.
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One Day At A Time
SERVING OTHERS
"It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life,
that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. "
Ralph Waldo Emerson
I'm not sure when I learned about giving service to others ... it seems like a long time ago. There's a feeling one gets deep inside when we do something to help others that makes us know we want to keep that feeling coming forever.
I believe our Higher Powers give us certain gifts. Maybe they're all put in a large bag and when we're born, HP distributes them ... sort of like one reaches in a grab bag at parties. I do know that everyone I have ever met has some soft of gift ... something that they do that comes easily and becomes something they get very good at doing. When they start giving others this gift, they get even better at doing what they do ... and that "feeling" inside begins to grow.
I was given three gifts: music, listening to others and writing. Music was the first gift I was aware of and I spent my life sharing it. In adulthood I learned I had another gift ~ the gift of being able to listen. I realized that a lot of people don't feel "heard." When I spent my time listening to others, I realized I was giving them a gift. Now I get that same special feeling I had when I performed in front of many people as I quietly sit and listen to someone pour out their heart to me. Finally, there came a time when I began to write ... and that same feeling emerged when someone would tell me that what I wrote made a difference to them.
I belong to an organization where hundreds of people give their gifts to others each day and I finally learned that there were reasons why so many people devote so much of their lives to service. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out ... we serve because we experience that feeling. We serve because it makes us feel good. We serve others because in doing so we serve ourselves.
One day at a time...
Let me continue to serve.
~ Mari
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are goint to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it. - Pg. 87 - Into Action
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
The most basic thing you can do right now is to understand the basics. Don't drink, pop pills, shoot dope, snort coke, smoke crack AND listen to the people you came to for help.
My Divine Source aids me in putting everything in perspective this hour--the basics are: don't use and listen!
Fear of Change
Today, I am able to live with my fear that I will not like myself or those close to me if we change. Change is threatening, and healing and growing include change. It doesn't matter to my fearful self if the change is for the better or worse. In fact, change for the better can sometimes be even more threatening. I fear that I will not know how to act or have the tools to be with the 'better' without smearing my disease all over it. I remind myself today, again, that I do not have to grow perfectly. This is not an easy road, but the gains are so apparent that I will have faith that my tough times will come to an end.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Relief Lies in Two Four Letter Words that Begin with F: Steps Four and Five. (P 29, Young, Sober, & Free)
I Uncover to Recover in Four and Five.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Sobriety is not a dress rehearsal.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I know I'm being guided and protected by a power greater than myself. I look forward to the unknown around the next bend in the road, the adventure over the next hill.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I try never to underestimate the destructive power of alcoholism. Or the healing power of Alcoholics Anonymous. - Trip S.
bluidkiti
05-19-2021, 06:21 AM
May 27
Daily Reflections
NO MAUDLIN GUILT
Day by day, we try to move a little toward God's perfection. So we
need not be consumed by maudlin guilt...
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 15
When I first discovered that there is not a single "don't" in the
Twelve Steps of A.A., I was disturbed because this discovery swung
open a giant portal. Only then was I able to realize what A.A. is for
me:
A.A. is not a program of "don'ts", but of "do's."
A.A. is not martial law; it is freedom.
A.A. is not tears over defects, but sweat over fixing them.
A.A. is not penitence; it is salvation.
A.A. is not "Woe to me" for my sins, past and present.
A.A. is "Praise God" for the progress I am making today.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In twelfth-step work, the fifth thing is Continuance. Continuance
means our staying with prospects after they have started on the new
way of living. We must stick with them and not let them down. We
must encourage them to go to meetings regularly for fellowship and
help. They will learn that keeping sober is a lot easier in the fellowship
of others who are trying to do the same thing. We must continue to
help prospects by going to see them regularly or telephoning them or
writing them so that they don't get out of touch with A.A. Continuance
means good sponsorship. Do I care enough about other alcoholics to
continue with them as long as necessary?
Meditation For The Day
Every strong and beautiful flower must have a strong root in the
ground. It must send a root down so that it may be rooted and
grounded while at the same time it sends a shoot up to be the flower
that shall gladden the world. Both growths are necessary. Without a
strong root, it would soon wither. The higher the growth upward, the
deeper must be the rooting. My life cannot flower into success and
helpfulness unless it is rooted in a strong faith, or unless it feels deeply
secure in the goodness and purpose of the universe.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that my life may be deeply rooted in faith. I pray that I may feel
deeply secure.
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As Bill Sees It
A.A.--the Lodestar, p. 147
We can be grateful for every agency or method that tries to solve the
problem of alcoholism--whether of medicine, religion, education, or
research. We can be open-minded toward all such efforts and we can
be sympathetic when the ill-advised ones fail. We can remember that
A.A. itself ran for years on "trial and error."
As individuals, we can and should work with those that promise
success--even a little success.
>> >> >>
Every one of the pioneers in the total field of alcoholism will
generously say that had it not been for the living proof of recovery in
A.A., they could not have gone on. A.A. was the lodestar of hope and
help that kept them at it.
Grapevine, March 1958
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Walk in Dry Places
Who is important?
Respect for people.
The Twelve step movement grew out of an earlier society, the Oxford group, whose members believed in "key People." They embraced the idea that attracting promising individuals with high standing would, in turn, attract others.
We've also had such people in AA and other 12 step groups, and we are grateful for their examples and efforts. We've learned, however, not to view one person as more important than anotehrs. We could even harm a recovering person by focusing on his or her personal prestige in the community. Our purpose is to help people get well, not to run a club empasizing social standing.
We'll find our program working much better if we treat all people equally, and view them as equal in the sight of God. We have a standing in God's sight that is eternal and everlasting.
I'll extend kind and generous thoughts toward every person I meet today. We are all children of equal standing in the sight of God.
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Keep It Simple
It's only by forgetting yourself that you draw near to God.---Henry David Thoreau
The biggest danger we face as recovering people is self-will. Do we try to control others?
Do we always put ourselves before others? Are we full of self-pity? These are all ways that bind us to our self-will.
In recovery, we put our lives in the hands of a loving God. Here, we find a new home. Our goal is to lose as much of our self-will as we can. We than put love in place of self-will. Recovery is truly about love.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I pray and offer my self-will to You, Self-will is a danger to my sobriety. I pray that I may be closer to You than to myself.
Action for the Day: I'll list the areas that self-will get in my way. I'll read my list every day next week, and I'll try to put love in place of self will.
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Each Day a New Beginning
As the wheel of the decades turns, so do a person's needs, desires, and tasks. Each of us does, in effect, strike a series of "deals" or compromises between the wants and longings of the inner self, and an outer environment that offers certain possibilities and sets certain limitations. --Maggie Scarf
What life has measured out may not be what we had dreamed of. Life's lessons may not be those we'd have chosen to learn. Wisdom dictates that the joy of life is proportional to the ease with which we accept those possibilities for growth that have grown out of our inner desires.
Our desires are like an outline for a written assignment, a research project. They help us to see where we want to go at any one time, but as we move the direction may need to change. The natural flow of "the assignment" will help to refine it.
We may not have tried to "realize" many of our desires in the past. But the time has come. One of the joys of recovery is that we understand our desires are closely related to our spiritual program and our recovery. And we know we are not alone. We need to attend to the inner desires that beckon to us. They are calling us to move forward.
Today, I can take the first few steps.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
How could men who loved their wives and children be so unthinking, so callous, so cruel? There could be no love in such persons, we thought. And just as we were being convinced of their heartlessness, they would surprise us with fresh resolves and new attentions. For a while they would be their old sweet selves, only to dash the new structure of affection to pieces once more. Asked why they commenced to drink again, they would reply with some silly excuse, or none. It was so baffling, so heartbreaking. Could we have been so mistaken in the men we married? When drinking, they were strangers. Sometimes they were so inaccessible that it seemed as though a great wall had been built around them.
p. 107
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
However, as he unfolded his story for me, I could not help but believe him. In describing his suffering, his fears, his many years of groping for some answer to that which always seemed to remain unanswerable, he could have been describing me, and nothing short of experience and knowledge could have afforded him that much insight! He had been dry 2 1/2 years and had been maintaining his contact with a group of recovered alcoholics in Akron. Contact with this group was extremely important to him. He told me that eventually he hoped such a group would develop in the Chicago area but that so far this had not been started. He thought it would be helpful for me to visit the Akron group and meet many like himself.
p. 273
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"Then, hesitantly, I ventured to talk about the spiritual side of our program. What a freeze that drunk gave me! I'd no sooner got the word `spiritual' out of my mouth than he pounced. `Oh!' he said. `Now I get it! You're proselytizing for some **** religious sect or other. Where do you get that "no angle" stuff? I belong to a great church that means everything to me. You've got a nerve to come in here talking religion!"
pp. 152-153
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"What worries you, masters you."
--Haddon W. Robinson
God, help me to have the strength to set reasonable limits for myself
and to tell others when I cannot help them. Help me learn to say no.
--Melody Beattie
God is watching over me, making my path easy.
--Alan Cohen
The Way To God
"Start the Day with Love; Spend the Day with Love; Fill the Day with
Love; End the Day with Love; This is the way to God."
--Sathya Sai Baba
Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
--Native American Proverb
Time is like a river - it flows by and doesn't return.
--Chinese Proverb
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
MOTIVES
"Lord, grant that I may always
desire more than I can
accomplish."
--Michelangelo
I must always "think big", not in an egotistical sense but as an
adventure in spirituality. When I had a small God, I always remained a
small person, with small aspirations and dreams. Today I have an
all-embracing inclusive God that fills the universe. Today I have hope
in my dreams.
As an alcoholic I missed so much. I observed very little about myself
and God's world, people and friends became inconsequential; nothing
really mattered except the desire to drink. My spiritual potential was
lost in my alcoholism.
Today I am realizing my potential and I can risk in sobriety. My motto
has become "go for it". Behind my dreams is my growth. I have a
sense of so much joy in the world that I wish to enthusiastically
experience my life.
God, I am so grateful to be alive.
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We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet
hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his
brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.
And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love
his brother.
1 John 4:19-21
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you,
so you must love one another.
John 13:34
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes
the proud but gives grace to the humble."
James 4:6
Though we stumble, we shall not fall headlong, for the LORD holds us by the hand.
Psalm 37:24
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Daily Inspiration
Too much of a good thing can actually diminish the joy and make it a burden. Lord, help me avoid excess and keep my life simpler and freer.
To know someone doesn't mean to know every detail of that person's life. It means to feel affection, confidence and to believe in that person. Lord, may I really know You and have it reflect in how I treat others.
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NA Just For Today
Meeting The Day's Challenge
"...the decision to ask for God's help is our greatest source of strength and courage." Basic Text, p. 26
A challenge is anything that dares us to succeed. Things new and unfamiliar serve as challenges, whether those things appear good or bad to us. We are challenged by obstacles and opposition from within ourselves and from without. New and difficult things, obstacles and opposition, all are a part of "life on life's terms" Living clean means learning to meet challenge.
Many of us, consciously or unconsciously, took drugs to avoid meeting challenge. Many of us were equally afraid of failure and success. Each time we declined the day's challenge, we suffered a loss of self-esteem. Some of us used drugs to mask the shame we felt. Each time we did that, we became even less able to meet our challenges and more likely to use.
By working the NA program, we've found the tools we need to successfully meet any challenge. We've come to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, a Power that cares for our will and our lives. We've asked that Power to remove our character defects, those things that made our lives unmanageable. We've taken action to improve our conscious contact with that Higher Power. Through the steps, we've been given the ability to stop using drugs and start living.
Each day, we are faced with new challenges. And each day, through working our program of recovery, we are given the grace to meet those challenges.
Just for today: I will ask my Higher Power to help me squarely meet today's challenge.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
If your life is ever going to get better, you'll have to take risks. There is simply no way you can grow without taking chances. --David Viscott
One sunny day a caterpillar who was afraid of the dark came to a tunnel which lay squarely in its path. It had a choice of going back where it started, or summoning the courage to crawl into the darkness. "What shall I do?" wondered the caterpillar. "If I go back home, I won't get where I want to go, but I'm so afraid!"
Just then, a voice called out from the tunnel. "I can hear you, Mr. Caterpillar. I am Mr. Beetle. I am here in the tunnel and I can see the other end. If you come through, you won't lose your fear of the dark, but you will get where you want to go."
We are all like the caterpillar once in a while. But if we let our fear stop us from doing things which are necessary to our growth, we will never realize what courage we really have.
Is my fear a necessary part of new experiences?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
At times almost all of us envy the animals. They suffer and die, but do not seem to make a "problem" of it. --Alan Watts
When we sit quietly and open ourselves to contact with our Higher Power, problems may come to mind. We seek some wisdom beyond ourselves to help us meet the challenges of this day. For many of us men, the greatest problem is our thinking rather than the situations we have to deal with.
Unlike animals, we complicate what is very simple. The pain we face is never fair, so we need not waste time trying to understand the justice or injustice of it. Our problems may seem large or overwhelming from today's perspective. By tomorrow or next month most of them will be resolved in some way, and we may not even remember them. Our spiritual path teaches us to do first things first each day and not fret about the outcome. We turn outcomes over to the will of God.
Today, I will use the simplicity of the animals as my guide.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
As the wheel of the decades turns, so do a person's needs, desires, and tasks. Each of us does, in effect, strike a series of "deals" or compromises between the wants and longings of the inner self, and an outer environment that offers certain possibilities and sets certain limitations. --Maggie Scarf
What life has measured out may not be what we had dreamed of. Life's lessons may not be those we'd have chosen to learn. Wisdom dictates that the joy of life is proportional to the ease with which we accept those possibilities for growth that have grown out of our inner desires.
Our desires are like an outline for a written assignment, a research project. They help us to see where we want to go at any one time, but as we move the direction may need to change. The natural flow of "the assignment" will help to refine it.
We may not have tried to "realize" many of our desires in the past. But the time has come. One of the joys of recovery is that we understand our desires are closely related to our spiritual program and our recovery. And we know we are not alone. We need to attend to the inner desires that beckon to us. They are calling us to move forward.
Today, I can take the first few steps.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Recognizing Choices
We have choices, more choices than we let ourselves see.
We may feel trapped in our relationships, our jobs, our life. We may feel locked into behaviors such as caretaking or controlling.
Feeling trapped is a symptom of codependency. When we hear ourselves say, I have to take care of this person. . . . I have to say yes. . . . I have to try to control that person. . . . I have to behave this way, think this way, feel this way. . . . we can know we are choosing not to see choices.
That sense of being trapped is an illusion. We are not controlled by circumstances, our past, the expectations of others, or our unhealthy expectations for ourselves. We can choose what feels right for us, without guilt. We have options.
Recovery is not about behaving perfectly or according to anyone else's rules. More than anything else, recovery is about knowing we have choices and giving ourselves the freedom to choose.
Today, I will open my thinking and myself to the choices available to me. I will make choices that are good for me.
I will take all the time I need to keep in touch with my Higher Power today. Meditation slows me down and brings me peace whenever I choose. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Stop Punishing Yourself with Fear
It’s time to stop punishing ourselves. Time to stop beating ourselves over the head with fear.
This is the scenario. A fear enters our mind. Our mind takes it and runs with it. Something bad is going to happen. Something terrible and traumatic is on the way. We quickly review the traumas of our past and make the determination: Yes, it is very possible that this devastating event will happen.
So we sit crouched in the present moment full of fear and dread. We worry that the worst that could possibly happen, probably will. We begin to believe that it is most likely waiting at our doorstep, ready to pounce on us and steal our joy, our peace, our place and rhythm in the universe.
Because we have harbored the fear so intensely, it has already manifested itself. The thing we fear doesn’t need to happen; it already has– or it might as well have– because we are already forcing ourselves to live through it.
Yes, many awful things have happened to you and me that we are very sorry happened. But that doesn’t mean that we have to give up the beauty of the present moment to something that hasn’t happened yet. Even if it does happen sometime in the future, by harboring the fear we will have lived through it twice as long as we need to.
Recognize and acknowledge your fear. Then release it. Let go of the energy. Stop punishing yourself. While life’s seasons may not always be fair, they are trustworthy. And within each day, each moment of each season, there is a way of peace and love.
Do not allow fear of what if to ruin the joy of what is.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s not right for you
Not all doors that open up are good for us to walk through.
Sometimes, we’re in that dark corridor, and no doors or windows are open. Then, a crack of light appears. We get an offer– for a job, for a relationship, for a place to live. Our gut goes off. We know this isn’t right for us. If we were desperate, we wouldn’t consider it.
You’re not desperate. Even if you are, act as if you aren’t. If it’s not right for you, it’s not right for you. Back off– even though you may be burning with impatience and desperation.
You don’t have to do anything that’s not right for you.
God, grant me a spirit of serenity and patience. Help me take a moment before making any decisions to ask for guidance first.
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Design for Life
Applying Feng Shui in Your Living Room by Madisyn Taylor
Address the energy needs of the heart of your home and you will find your home is soon buzzing with a new feeling of harmony.
A well-kept home can be compared to a living being in optimal health—it is fueled by intention, thrives when in balance, and relies on the energy of life itself for sustenance. Feng shui, the ancient Chinese art of harmonious placement, describes the living room as the heart of the home. Maintaining the gentle flow of chi, or life energy, is important since it is the home where members of a family and the larger community come together to engage with one another in fellowship. A living room that is organized and decorated in accordance with the balancing principles of feng shui is inviting, encourages relaxation and conversation, and makes all who enter feel content.
All of this can be accomplished by simply changing the physical and aesthetic character of a room. When its flow is blocked by furniture, walls, or doorways, we tend to feel uneasy and become less satisfied with life as a result. Promoting harmony in a home's living area is simple when it is regarded as both a single, unified space and a collection of smaller regions of space. First, stand in the room's main doorway to examine your living room as a whole. Look for and clear away clutter— the rightmost side of the room can inspire stability in close personal relationships, while tidying the leftmost side will increase your prosperity potential. Release stagnant energy by orienting chairs and sofas in a ring, veiling harsh angles with plants or ornamental screens, and using other furniture to break up direct pathways. A fireplace that serves as the focal point of the room stimulates passion and openness, while sculptures absorb negativity.
If the structural design of your living room does not allow you to decorate in accordance with the principles of feng shui, there are steps you can take to ensure that balance is nonetheless maintained. Mirrors, fountains, chimes, crystals, and aquariums all redirect the flow of chi, while also attracting luck, abundance, and peace. Adding warm colors such as pinks and reds to the living room can be curative even when no other changes are feasible. It does not matter how large or small your living room is, nor how fancy or plain. Address the energy needs of the heart of your home, and you will find your home as a whole is soon imbued with a new harmoniousness that manifests itself indelibly in your existence. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I have only myself to talk to, the conversation gets sort of one-sided. Trying to talk myself out of a drink or a pill or a “small wager” or just one chocolate eclair is sort of like trying self-hypnosis. It simply doesn’t work; most of the time, it’s about as effective as trying to talk myself out of a case of diarrhea. When my heart is heavy and my resistance low, I can always find some comfort in sharing with a true and understanding friend in The Program. Do I know who my friends are?
Today I Pray
May I be convinced that, as part of God’s master plan, we were put here to help each other. May I be as open about asking for help as I am ready to give it, no matter how long I have been in The Program. May the experiences of countless others be enough to prove to me that “talking myself out of it” seldom works, that the mutual holstering that comes from sharing with a friend usually does.
Today I Will Remember
When I ask for help, I am Helping.
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One More Day
True miracles are created by men where they use the courage and intelligence that God gave them.
– Jean Anouilh
Recently a woman in Minnesota received her Ph.D. She was eighty years old. She said she needed to conquer new worlds.
The quest for learning should never end, yet all too often we feel our education ends when we are done with school. If we want something intensely enough, whether we set our sights for an education or some other goal, it’s very likely we will find a way of achieving our needs. Sometimes in the process of getting there, we discover other tracks to follow, which may take us to a slightly different endpoint than the one we had originally envisioned. We learn, as mature adults, to accept substitutes. And still we reach as far as we are able.
I can learn to set new goals — ones which challenge me but don’t defeat me.
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Food For Thought
Share the Wealth
Most of us are lucky enough to have been blessed with a more than adequate supply of food. Our problem has been too much rather than too little. Not everyone on our planet is so fortunate. We all know that millions of people in this world die prematurely because of malnutrition and starvation.
We probably feel that it would be impossible to individually effect a more equitable distribution of the world's food resources. And yet, there are things we can do if we have a sincere desire to help. Money which we save by personally eating less may be sent to a charitable organization or used to sponsor a child in one of the less developed countries. A plan for sharing can increase our own motivation to maintain abstinence and avoid binges.
Even though we cannot change the entire world, we can be responsible for changing our own behavior and finding new ways to share what we have. In the process, we benefit the most through better health, positive emotions, and mental peace. Moderate consumption is in our own best interest.
Teach me to share.
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One Day At A Time
Balance
"I've learned that you can't have everything ...
and do everything ...
at the same time."
Oprah Winfrey
Learning about balance has been a struggle throughout my life; both as an addict and as a mother, friend, lover, sister... and woman. I'm not sure if it is my addiction that causes me to be over-zealous when it comes to giving too much to too many, or if my desire for love has manifested my addiction out of a need to feel full and satisfied. For me, finding that spot where a relationship is comfortable and not one-sided, where work is just 'work' and not all that nourishes my life... where school is an enhancement and not a crutch for hiding and isolating, is a hard place to for me to find. I see patterns within my life where I consistently struggle for harmony and balance. Why isn't one of anything enough? No matter what it is that is in my life; relationships, work, eating, shopping, I have to work at managing balance so that things flow at the right pace, otherwise, my entire life is off kilter.
But today, I don't need to struggle. I don't need to overdo my relationships or my work. I can do just one thing and know that the rest will be there tomorrow. Today I have the gifts that have been given to me to manage my life.
One Day at a Time . . .
I pray that God will help me to manage and balance my life so that I can do a good job with all things, especially living.
~ Pamela
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
Many alcoholics are enthusiasts. They run to extremes. At the beginning of recovery a man will take, as a rule, one of two directions. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. In either case certain family problems arise. With these we have had experience galore. - Pgs. 125-126 - The Family Afterward
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
If we can meditate at first, good. If we can pray, good. But if we can't, we mustn't worry. Discipline and dedication will come later. They are not great virtues of addicts. In the meantime we must attend meetings daily, find a sponsor, use professional help if its available and don't take that first fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort.
May I not get down on myself for not doing everything people tell me I should. I need only go to meetings and stay clean and sober right now.
Acting As If
There will be times when I do not feel up to things, when there seems to be too big a gap between who I think I am and who I want to be. I believe in being true to myself, in being basically honest. When I first try something new, it may feel as if I am trying on an article of clothing that doesn't quite suit me. But there is nothing wrong with acting 'as if.' I may need to practice new behaviors in order to become comfortable with them. Sometimes, when I allow myself to act 'as if,' the old me sort of falls away and makes room for something new. Children do this all the time, trying on different roles and playing with them. There is no reason to commit myself to a limited view of who I am.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
My sponsor's mistakes become my gifts when I listen.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
We're not against alcohol, we're for sobriety.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I will take all the time I need to keep in touch with my Higher Power today. Meditation slows me down and brings me peace whenever I choose.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I was always trying to find a balance between being a doormat or a bulldozer. - Bea M.
bluidkiti
05-19-2021, 06:22 AM
May 28
Daily Reflections
EQUAL RIGHTS
At one time or another most A.A. groups go on rule making
benders. . . . After a time fear and intolerance subside.
[and we realize] We do not wish to deny anyone his chance
to recover from alcoholism. We wish to be just as inclusive
as we can, never exclusive.
"A.A. TRADITION: HOW IT DEVELOPED." pp. 10, 11, 12
A.A. offered me complete freedom and accepted me into the
Fellowship for myself. Membership did not depend upon
conformity, financial success or education and I am so
grateful for that. I often ask myself if I extend the same
equality to others or if I deny them the freedom to be
different. Today I try to replace my fear and intolerance
with faith, patience, love and acceptance. I can bring these
strengths to my A.A. group, my home and my office. I make
an effort to bring my positive attitude everywhere that I
go.
I have neither the right, nor the responsibility, to judge
others. Depending on my attitude I can view newcomers to
A.A., family members and friends as menaces or as teachers.
When I think of some of my past judgments, it is clear how
my self-righteousness caused me spiritual harm.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
In A.A. we learn that since we are alcoholics we can be
uniquely useful people. That is, we can help other alcoholics
when perhaps somebody who has not had our experience with
drinking could not help them. That makes us uniquely useful.
The A.A.s are a unique group of people because they have taken
their own greatest defeat and failure and sickness and used it
as a means of helping others. We who have been through the
same thing are the ones who can best help other alcoholics. Do
I believe that I can be uniquely useful?
Meditation For The Day
I should try to practice the presence of God. I can feel that
He is with me and near me, protecting and strengthening me
always. In spite of every difficulty, every trial, every
failure, the presence of God suffices. Just to believe that
He is near me brings strength and peace. I should try to live
as though God were beside me. I cannot see Him because I was
not made with the ability to see Him else there were no room
for faith. But I can feel His spirit with me.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may try to practice the presence of God. I
pray that by doing so I may never feel alone or helpless
again.
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As Bill Sees It
A.A.--the Lodestar, p. 147
We can be grateful for every agency or method that tries to solve the
problem of alcoholism--whether of medicine, religion, education, or
research. We can be open-minded toward all such efforts and we can
be sympathetic when the ill-advised ones fail. We can remember that
A.A. itself ran for years on "trial and error."
As individuals, we can and should work with those that promise
success--even a little success.
<< << << >> >> >>
Every one of the pioneers in the total field of alcoholism will
generously say that had it not been for the living proof of recovery in
A.A., they could not have gone on. A.A. was the lodestar of hope and
help that kept them at it.
Grapevine, March 1958
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Walk in Dry Places
Everyday risks.... Courage
We have to take certain risks if we hope to achieve anything. Applying for a job entail a risk of reject. Saving money carries a risk of losing it. Falling in love can result in heartbreak.
We have to take such risks because life is ordered that way. We are hear to learn, and learning includes pressing into unknown situations where we could fail.
God could have created us in such a way we could either avoid risks or not unduly concerned about the. Animals, for example, live with risks but do no seem to worry about them.
We must accept risk as part of God's plan for us. We also are given tools for working with uncertainties. We have our innate intelligence and a capacity for prudent, reasoned action. We have friends who will help us. Above all, we have our Higher Power, who guides and directs
us through all sorts of risky conditions.
I cannot face life without also facing uncertainties. Today I'll accept risk as a prt of ordinary living.
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Keep It Simple
Who dares nothing, need hope for nothing.---Johann Fredrich von Schiller
As we grow in recovery, we'll need to change our behaviors, values, and beliefs to stay sane. This take courage. Courage is doing what is needed in spite of fear.
Courage means facing what we can't change. We can't change the fact that we have hurt people. We can't change the fact we have an illness. And we can't change the fact that we need help from others.
Courage also means facing those things we can change. We need courage to be honest, to have faith, and to be humble. And we need courage to let people know how important they are.
Prayer for the Day: Courage is more than being tough. Courage means being human. Higher Power, grant me the courage to stay sober and live a spiritual life.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll have an attitude of courage. I'll talk in my meeting. I'll offer help where it is needed. I'll have the courage to say no when needed.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Spiritual power can be seen in a person's reverence for life--hers and all others, including animals and nature, with a recognition of a universal life force referred to by many as God. --Virginia Satir
Taking the time, daily, to recognize the spiritual force in everyone and everything that is all about us, encourages us to feel humble, to feel awe. Reflecting on our interconnections, our need for one and all to complete the universe, lessens whatever adversity we might feel as we struggle with our humanity.
Our spiritual power is enhanced with each blessing we give. And as our spiritual power is enhanced, life's trials are fewer. Our struggle to accept situations, conditions, and other people, or our struggle to control them, lessens every day that we recognize and revere one another's personhood, one another's existence.
I can teach myself reverence, and I can begin today. I will look for "the Spirit" everywhere, and I will begin to see it.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
And even if they did not love their families, how could they be so blind about themselves? What had become of their judgment, their common sense, their will power? Why could they not see that drink meant ruin to them? Why was it, when these dangers were pointed out that they agreed, and then got drunk again immediately?
pp. 107-108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
By this time, with the doctor's explanation, the revelations contained in the book, and the hope-inspiring interview with Mr. T, I was ready and willing to go to the ends of the earth, if that was what it took, for me to find what these people had.
pp. 273-274
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Five - "Each group has but one primary purpose - to carry it's message to the alcoholic who still suffers."
"Thank heaven I came up with the right answer for that one. It was based foursquare on the single purpose of A.A. `You have faith,' I said. `Perhaps far deeper faith than mine. No doubt you're better taught in religious matters than I. So I can't tell you anything about religion. I don't even want to try. I'll bet, too, that you could give me a letter-perfect definition of humility. But from what you've told me about yourself and your problems and how you propose to lick them, I think I know what's wrong.'
"`Okay,' he said. `Give me the business.'
"`Well,' I said, `I think you're just a conceited Irishman who thinks he can run the whole show.'
"This really rocked him. But as he calmed down, he began to listen while I tried to show him that humility was the main key to sobriety. Finally, he saw that I wasn't attempting to change his religious views, that I wanted him to find the grace in his own religion that would aid his recovery. From there on we got along fine.
"Now," concludes the oldtimer, "suppose I'd been obliged to talk to this man on religious grounds? Suppose my answer had to be that A.A. needed a lot of money; that A.A. went in for education, hospital, and rehabilitation? Suppose I'd suggested that I'd take a hand in his domestic and business affairs? Where would we have wound up? No place, of course."
Years later, this tough Irish customer liked to say, "my sponsor sold me one idea, and that was sobriety. At the time, I couldn't have bought anything else."
pp. 153-154
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God, help me realize that to do your will for me today, in however a
small way, I must let go of my own will.
--Day By Day
No matter what happens, I must get on with my life.
--Ruth Humlecker
"Today I'll use the slogan, 'How important is it?' It will help me think
things through before I act and it will give me a better picture of just
what is important in my life."
--Alateen--One Day At A Time
Sometimes laughter is the next lesson we need to be learning.
--Melody Beattie
If your sobriety isn't your absolute top priority, the most important
thing in your life, you're going to get drunk again.
--"Things My Sponsors Taught Me" Paul H.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
CHRISTIANITY
"He who begins by loving
Christianity better than Truth will
proceed by loving his sect or
church better than Christianity,
and end in loving himself better
than all."
--Samuel Taylor Coleridge
My program for recovery from addiction is spiritual and not religious. I
believe that spirituality encompasses all that is good and noble in all
the great religions of the world. It cannot be confined or limited to one
religion or denomination. Spirituality stops the recovering person from
looking for the differences; it stops the arrogance and prejudice; it
stops the division and separations that feed the disease. Spirituality
emphasizes the inherent unity of man. It teaches the most stubborn of
men to hold hands.
God the Creator is revealed in the variety of His universe. I can find
Him in the sunset, the variety of animals, the love and care of family
and friends, the excitement and vision of poetry and art, the
inspiration of music. Spirituality is . . .!
Kneeling before the beauty of Your creation I whisper "Amen".
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A man's pride will bring him low, but the humble in spirit will retain
honor.
Proverbs 29:23
You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
John 8:32
I am the way, and the truth, and the life.
John 14:6
"If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not
become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."
Gal 5:25-26
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Daily Inspiration
Expect more of yourself than you do of others and you will save yourself much stress and disappointment. Lord, help me to see how capable that I am.
God is always at work in your life. Notice His light on the events of your day. Lord, I sometimes look without really seeing. Help me to pause and notice.
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NA Just For Today
As We Understand
"We examined our lives and discovered who we really are. To be truly humble is to accept and honestly try to be ourselves."
Basic Text, p. 35
As using addicts, the demands of our disease determined our personality. We could be whoever or whatever we needed to be in order to get our "fix." We were survival machines, adapting easily to every circumstance of the using life.
Once we began our recovery, we entered a new and different life. Many of us had no idea what behavior was appropriate for us in any given situation. Some of us didn't know how to talk to people, how to dress, or how to behave in public. We couldn't be ourselves because we didn't know who we were anymore.
The Twelve Steps give us a simple method for finding out who we really are. We uncover our assets and our defects, the things we like about ourselves and the things we're not so thrilled about. Through the healing power of the Twelve Steps, we begin to understand that we are individuals, created to be who we are by the Higher Power of our understanding. The real healing begins when we understand that if our Higher Power created us this way, it must be okay to be who we really are.
Just for today: By working the steps I can experience the freedom to be myself, the person my Higher Power intended me to be.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
The little rabbit stood alone, watching her family and friends hop and skip about her in the forest, playing her favorite rabbit game. Try as she might, each time she attempted to join in, she tripped about awkwardly. When this happened, the other rabbits laughed uproariously at her and called her "Grace." Soon even she forgot her real name. But in the moments when Grace was alone, she danced around the trees with ease. She was as smooth and graceful as any ballerina. An old owl sat high above her one night, watching her intently. The moonlight streamed through the treetops like a soft spotlight and he sat and watched as little Grace moved in and out of the moonbeams. Finally he said, "Grace, you are more graceful than any creature I've ever seen." Grace was startled that someone had been watching her, but listened carefully to the wise owl's words as he continued. "You have carried this beauty within you all the time, but locked it inside when you tried too hard." If we remember to relax and trust in ourselves, we, too, will discover that we are able.
What hidden ability can I set loose today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I sidestep the either/or choices of logic and choose both. --Ken Feit
Men like us have often had a lifestyle guided by either/or logic. We think we must either conquer the challenge we see before us or we will be failures. We think loved ones must either meet our needs or they do not love us. We think we must either be perfect or we are unacceptable.
Let us now step back from the rigidity of such unhealthy logic. Much of human experience and many answers to our problems don't come in neatly tied packages. As we learn to think and feel in more flexible ways, we find life gets better. Using our intuition at times, rather than always following rigid rules for life, improves the recipe. The arrogance of our thought process has sometimes told us we had the answer, but it closed us to the growth which only comes by trusting our feelings. If we make mistakes, we can learn from them and go on. Many of the most ingenious inventions came not by rigidly following rules, but by following an inner feeling.
Today, I will be open to more possibilities in my thinking.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Spiritual power can be seen in a person's reverence for life--hers and all others, including animals and nature, with a recognition of a universal life force referred to by many as God. --Virginia Satir
Taking the time, daily, to recognize the spiritual force in everyone and everything that is all about us, encourages us to feel humble, to feel awe. Reflecting on our interconnections, our need for one and all to complete the universe, lessens whatever adversity we might feel as we struggle with our humanity.
Our spiritual power is enhanced with each blessing we give. And as our spiritual power is enhanced, life's trials are fewer. Our struggle to accept situations, conditions, and other people, or our struggle to control them, lessens every day that we recognize and revere one another's personhood, one another's existence.
I can teach myself reverence, and I can begin today. I will look for "the Spirit" everywhere, and I will begin to see it.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Self Doubt
A married woman who had recently joined Al Anon called me one afternoon. She worked part time as a registered nurse, had assumed all the responsibilities for raising her two children, and did all the household chores, including repairs and finances. I want to separate from my husband, she sobbed. I cant stand him or his abuse any longer. But tell me, please tell me, she said, do you think I can take care of myself? --Codependent No More
Not only is it okay to take care of ourselves, we can take good care of ourselves.
Many of us, so confident about our ability to take care of others, doubt our inherent strength to care for ourselves. We may have come to believe, from our past or present circumstances, that we need to take care of others and we need others to take care of us. This is the ultimate codependent belief.
No matter where this self-defeating belief was born, we can release it and replace it with a better one, a healthier one, a more accurate one.
We can take care of ourselves whether we are in or out of a relationship. Everything we need will be provided. We will have loved ones, friends, and our Higher Power to help.
Knowing that we can take care of ourselves doesn't mean we wont have feelings of fear, discomfort, doubt, anger, and fragility at times. It means we practice courageous vulnerability, as Colette Dowling called it in Cinderella Complex. We may feel scared, but we do it anyway.
Today, God, help me know how I can take care of myself.
Nothing can stop me from feeling wonderful today. I am filled with all the wonder and splendor of the universe and I pass these on to everyone I meet. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let the Universe Support You
Who or what is your source of power? Who or what are you connected to?
Watch yourself as you go through your days. Where do you get your nurturing, your support, your empowerment, your energy? Does it all come from one person? Do you have a multitude of sources? Do you consider God, the Divine, your ultimate source?
There was a time when many of us made one person our only source. That time is past. Although special people are in our lives to be a special support, one of our lessons has been to broaden our connections, to connect to the universe, to open up to all the love and support that is there for us. If we use for our source only one person, one job, one place, one situation, we may encounter problems. Searching for many sources of support is a sign of our growth, a sign that we are continuing on our journey.
Value and cherish the people in your life who feed your soul and nurture your heart. Value and cherish the people who are special to you, who you hold dear, who help support you. But don’t limit your connections. Open your heart to a living universe. Open your heart to Divine love.
Know that if you can’t get what you need from one person or place, it is because the universe has something or someone better for your needs and your growth.
Who and what are you connected to? Are you willing to become connected to the universe?
Open your heart, your mind, your soul, and let the universe teach you about Divine love. Stop limiting your source to only one person. Open to a limitless source of support and energy. Open to the universe.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to focus
I was getting ready to make a skydive. I had a lot going on at the time– problems with construction workers, some phone calls I needed to make.
“Put it all aside for right now,” Andy, my jump master said. “The only thing in the world you’re going to focus on for the next hour is the skydive you’re going to make. You don’t want to be jumping out of that plane with other stuff going on in your mind.”
I did what he said. I deliberately pushed aside all other thoughts of people, what they were feeling, what I had to do, and how they were going to respond.
“That’s one of the benefits of skydiving,” Andy said. “It’s really taught me to focus my mind.”
Sometimes we get interrupted. Sometimes it’s good to let our consciousness flow and our minds wander. Sometimes it’s time to focus on one task and let others care and ideas slip away. We have so much power in this marvelous world. One of the powers available to us is dedication, commitment, and focus on the task at hand.
Learn to focus on one thing you want to do. If you’ve been struggling with and procrastinating about something, make a commitment to focusing on that task until it’s done.
God, help me learn to focus my energies on the essential tasks at hand.
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Capturing Life’s Flavor
Taking a Field Trip by Madisyn Taylor
Adding variety to your life in the form of a field trip can break up the monotony of your days and lead you to adventure.
When we were children, few words were more exciting to hear than the phrase “field trip.” Field trips were a break from schoolwork and an opportunity to go on an adventure with friends. Now that we are grown ups, taking a field trip can be just as fun and memorable – if only we were willing to sign our own permission slips so we could go on one.
Allowing yourself to get stuck in your routine can make life seem boring. Adding a touch of variety to your life in the form of a field trip can break up the monotony of your days and lead you to adventure. Unlike the jaunts that were regulated by teachers or monitored by parents, taking a field trip as an adult can lead you anywhere you want. You can go on a daylong retreat or spend just a few hours at your destination. A field trip can be an opportunity to explore a new landscape or discover something about yourself. Taking a day trip to another town or visiting an unfamiliar spot in your neighborhood can be educational and fun. There is also much to be said for finding a beautiful spot under a tree where you can read a book. You can even go to one of your favorite spots and allow yourself to experience it as if you were visiting there for the first time. Going on a field trip is as much a state of mind as it is a change in the scenery.
During a “grown up” field trip, schedules, clocks, and duties are put aside so you can focus wholeheartedly on mindfully enjoying yourself. Planning a field trip can be almost as fun as going on one. A field trip is an excursion to look forward to and an experience to be savored after the fact. Wherever you decide to go and whatever you decide to do, going on a field trip can add much pleasure and excitement to your life. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
We’ve all had times when we felt alienated, when it seemed we had nowhere to turn and no one to turn to. When we don’t know which way to turn, when there seems to be no one to help us, even then we’re not alone or without help, the presence of God is always with us. When we need strength or courage or comfort, God is there with us as the help we need. Even before we turn to God, His love reaches out to us; His loving Spirit in us hears our cry and answers us. Do I truly believe that I no longer need be alone?
Today I Pray
May I never be alone, even in a place by myself, if I take time to talk to my Higher Power. May He be my companion, my joy, my ever-present help in trouble. May the knowledge of His constant presence fill me with calm, so that I will not fear either the solitude of my own room or alienation in a roomful of people.
Today I Will Remember
Listen for the presence of God.
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One More Day
Very few live by choice. Every man is placed in his present condition by causes which acted without his foresight, and with which he did not always willingly operate.
– Samuel Johnson
How does a person cope with a chronic illness? Our lives are formed by the events around us; these events often move forward of their own volition, without our permission or even our willingness. Now that the problem is obvious, living with that change will test our characters.
Those of us who have learned to cope with radically altered lifestyles and who can still love, laugh, and cry are survivors. We may not like our portion in life, but we are determined to handle it well.
I haven’t chosen all the changes in my life, but I can choose to accept the changes and to live a warm and sharing life.
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Food For Thought
Patience
The person who is a compulsive overeater is often someone who wants what he or she wants right now, if not before. When we take inventory, many of us realize that impatience is one of our most troublesome character defects. We are impatient with other people when they do not see things our way, we are impatient with the slowness of weight loss, and we are impatient when we do not seem to be making emotional and spiritual progress.
Cultivating patience helps us tremendously with our program. We grow in patience when we give God control of our lives and decide to live according to His timetable. If we accept what happens to us as the will of a Higher Power, we are better able to treat even the unpleasant situations as learning experiences. We become more patient with ourselves when we view our failures as opportunities to try again.
Fruitful growth is slow. Only weeds grow quickly. Acknowledging powerlessness builds the patience to persevere with what we can do and the faith to leave the results to God.
Trusting in You, may I learn patience.
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One Day At A Time
Serenity
"Serenity is not freedom from the storm,
but peace amid the storm."
Anonymous Quote
Why is serenity so important to our recovery? Because darkness cannotexist where there is light! If we can maintain a serene state of mind as established through our faith in HP and the BB Promises, negative emotions and behaviour will have no power over us. Stress, fear, compulsiveness, obsessiveness, resentment, guilt, shame, willfulness, doubt, distrust, greed and envy, have no power over a mind that is kept in serene repose. Serenity allows us to see situations clearly and makewise decisions. Most importantly, by maintaining a serene mind, we keep the door to our High Power open.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will face each challenge with grace and serenity.
~ Rob R.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I do not hold with those who believe that alcoholism is entirely a problem of the mental control. I have had many men who had, for example, worked a period of months on some problem or business deal which was to be settled on a certain date, favorably to them. They took a drink a day or so prior to the date, and the phenomenon of craving at once became paramount to all other interests so that the important appointment was not met. These men were not drinking to escape; they were drinking to overcome a craving beyond their mental control. - Pgs. xxix-xxx - 4th. Edition - The Doctors Opinion
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We all share fear. Fear is at the root of our illness. The conquest of fear is the greatest labor of the newly sober.
I offer my fear to my Higher Power, God as I understand You.
I Am Not Alone
Today, I know that, with God's help, I can do anything I need to do. When I feel alone or shaken up, I can ask for help within myself and know that it is there. Each of us is ultimately alone. Each of us has to learn our own lessons; that is, what we are here to do. We can't learn anyone else's lessons for them, and learning our own is difficult enough. To plow through my own psyche and face the insecurity and wounds that are there is all that I can handle. To try to live other people's lives for them is to separate myself from God because my first access to God is through and within me.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Living life on life's terms,' just what does this mean to us? It doesn't mean we will get a brownie button for every day we stay abstinent. It simply means life can be tough and we can stay sober if we chose to live by principle.
'Don't you worry none, just take it like it comes, one day at a time.' Song, One Day at a Time
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Religion is for those who want life after death. Spirituality is for those who want life BEFORE death!
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Nothing can stop me from feeling wonderful today. I am filled with all the wonder and splendor of the universe and I pass these on to everyone I meet.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
When I look back over my childhood, all I really remember is...Me. - Bob D.
bluidkiti
05-19-2021, 06:22 AM
May 29
Daily Reflections
TRUE TOLERANCE
The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 139
I first heard the short form of the Third Tradition in the Preamble.
When I came to A.A. I could not accept myself, my alcoholism, or a
Higher Power. If there had been any physical, mental, moral, or
religious requirements for membership, I would be dead today. Bill W.
said in his tape on the Traditions that the Third Tradition is a charter
for individual freedom. The most impressive thing to me was the
feeling of acceptance from members who were practicing the Third
Tradition by tolerating and accepting me. I feel acceptance is love and
love is God's will for us.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
We who have learned to put our drink problem in God's hands can
help others to do so. We can be used as a connection between an
alcoholic's need and God's supply of strength. We in Alcoholics
Anonymous can be uniquely useful, just because we have the
misfortune or fortune to be alcoholics ourselves. Do I want to be a
uniquely useful person? Will I use my own greatest defeat and failure
and sickness as a weapon to help others?
Meditation For The Day
I will try to help others. I will try not to let a day pass without reaching
out an arm of love to someone. Each day I will try to do something to
lift another human being out of the sea of discouragement into which
he or she has fallen. My helping hand is needed to raise the helpless to
courage, to strength, to faith, to health. In my own gratitude, I will
turn and help other alcoholics with the burden that is pressing too
heavily upon them.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be used by God to lighten many burdens. I pray that
many souls may be helped through my efforts.
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As Bill Sees It
More than Comfort, p. 148
When I am feeling depressed, I repeat to myself statements such as
these: "Pain is the touchstone of progress." . . . "Fear no evil." . . .
"This, too, will pass." . . . "This experience can be turned to benefit."
These fragments of prayer bring far more than mere comfort. They
keep me on the track of right acceptance; they break up my
compulsive themes of guilt, depression, rebellion, and pride; and
sometimes they endow me with the courage to change the things I
can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
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Walk in Dry Places
Guarding against disguised hostility
Fairness.
One of the pitfalls in continued recovery is the tendency to become self-righteous and judgmental. Sometimes this fuses into a hostility directed toward newcomers or chronic "slippers". Now and then, we've seen grumpy older members demanding that those who slip get honest.
While we may be right in concluding that a person is not showing honesty, we have NO RIGHT to denounce or expose anyone in a group setting. Far from helping the person, we may be showing off. If there is hostility in our words or manner, the other person will certainly sense it.
The best group setting for good recovery is always one that expresses warmth, acceptance, and understanding. There are few, if any, times when a verbal assault can be justified. Before we lash out at another person's lack of honesty, we must take an honest look at our own motives and feelings.
I'll face the day with a feeling of goodwill and acceptance in my dealings with every person I meet. If I attend a meeting, I'll show the same warmth and acceptance toward every person there.
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Keep It Simple
The more one judges the less on love.---Balzac
At times we need to make judgments about people's behavior. We stand back and look at how their lives affect our sobriety. We have to do this to choose people whose relationships will be good for us. We have to do this before we trust someone in business. We should take a good look at the others person before we fall in love. But we decide to trust or love someone, we have to stop judging.
When we love someone, we don't stand back. We move in close. We give them all our love can offer. We don't just think and judge. We feel. We are on their side. We look for the good in them. We don't pick them apart. We love the whole person.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me to judge a little and love a lot. Help me accept the people I love, faults and all. Help me love them better.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll catch myself when I start to judge others. I will accept them as they are.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Women sometimes gossip when they want to get close to people. --Joan Gilbertson
Feeling alone and lonely heightens our fears of inadequacy. In our alienation from others, paranoia grips us. We yearn to feel connection with someone, and gossip about another someone can draw two lonely people close. We are bonded.
We need a sense of belonging, every one of us: belonging to the neighborhood; belonging to the staff where we work; belonging to the group we call friends. Knowing that we do belong fosters the inner warmth that accompanies security, well-being. And our fears are melted.
The program's Fifth, Ninth, and Tenth Steps guarantee that we'll feel the closeness we long for when we work them. Self-revelation strengthens our ties to the people we long to connect with Gossip loses its appeal when we know we share a closeness already. Mingling our vulnerabilities secures our closeness.
We need to be attentive to our judgments of others, be they verbalized in gossip or only savored in silence. These judgments act as barometers of our own self-image. Our security in knowing we belong, that we are one, relieves us of the need to judge others unfairly.
Loneliness pushes me to behavior that even compounds the loneliness. Real closeness will come when I talk about myself rather than someone else.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
These are some of the questions which race through the mind of every woman who has an alcoholic husband. We hope this book has answered some of them. Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated. You can see that he really does love with his better self. Of course, there is such a thing as incompatibility, but in nearly every instance the alcoholic only seems to be unloving and inconsiderate; it is usually because he is warped and sickened that he says and does these appalling things. Today most of our men are better husbands and fathers than ever before.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
So I went to Akron, and also to Cleveland, and I met more alcoholics. I saw in these people a quality of peace and serenity that I knew I must have for myself. Not only were they at peace with themselves, but they were getting a kick out of life such as seldom encounters, except in the very young. They seemed to have all the ingredients for successful living: philosophy, faith, a sense of humor (they could laugh at themselves), clear-cut objectives, appreciation---and most especially appreciation and sympathetic understanding for their fellow man.
p. 274
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Six - "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
THE moment we saw that we had an answer for alcoholism, it was reasonable (or so it seemed at the time) for us to feel that we might have the answer to a lot of other things. The A.A. groups, many thought, could go into business, might finance any enterprise whatever in the total field of alcoholism. In fact, we felt duty-bound to throw the whole weight of the A.A. name behind any meritorious cause.
p. 155
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"Good friends are good for your health."
--Irwin Sarason
"Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you."
--Elbert Hubbard
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into
enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order,
confusion to clarity. . . . Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings
peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
--Melody Beattie
Why do birds sing in the morning? It's the triumphant shout: "We got
through another night."
--Enid Bagnold
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
--Kahlil Gibran
No matter where our journey takes us, God walks with us.
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
SELF
"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in
the stars, but in ourselves that
we are underlings."
--William Shakespeare
My addiction to alcohol led me away from "self": today in my sobriety
I am beginning to understand me. For years I blamed others for my
misfortunes but today I see that I was the enemy in my life. It was a
"cop-out" to blame God, family, job or life for my alcoholism - I
needed to take responsibility for "self".
Part of my recovery program today involves me not looking "outside"
for answers but looking within. The answer is not in the stars, not in
fate - but rather in the destiny I create by the decisions I make today.
I, and I alone, forge my future.
O Lord, let me create a life that is pleasing in Your sight.
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Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the
LORD is. For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that
spreadeth out her roots by the river.
Jeremiah 17:8
"The LORD is good, A stronghold in the day of trouble;
And He knows those who trust in Him."
Nahum 1:7
The LORD said, "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you."
Isaiah 43:2
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Daily Inspiration
Sometimes we spend our time demanding that the present moment be different than it is instead of facing the situation and dealing with it. Lord, strengthen my faith because through You I will have enough power to overcome any obstacles.
Take heart in the beauty of your life because God loves, helps, fights and wins. Lord, I will never fear because nothing can triumph over Your Will.
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NA Just For Today
Carry Me
"We believe that our Higher Power will take care of us"
Basic Text, p. 55
We all have times when it seems as though our lives are falling apart. There are days, or even weeks, when it seems that everything that can go wrong is going wrong. Whether it's the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, or the end of a relationship, we doubt that we'll survive the changes taking place in our lives.
It's during the times when the world is crashing down around our ears that we find our greatest faith in a loving Higher Power. No human being could relieve our suffering; we know that only God's care can provide the comfort we seek. We feel broken but we go on, knowing that our lives will be repaired.
As we progress in our recovery and our faith in our Higher Power grows, we are sure to greet the difficult times with a sense of hope, despite the pain we may be in. We need not despair, for we know that our Higher Power's care will carry us through when we can't walk on our own.
Just for today: I will rely on God's care through the painful times, knowing that my Higher Power will always be there.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The only people who never fail are those who never try. --Ilka Chase
A boy once asked his grandfather how he had become so happy and successful in his life. "Right decisions," replied his grandfather. The boy thought for a while and then asked a second question, "But how do you learn to make right decisions?" The grandfather answered quickly with a twinkle in his eye, "Wrong decisions!"
We, too, will learn from our "wrong decisions," our mistakes. Whenever we try anything, there is always the possibility of failure. We must learn to not let this keep us from trying. When we are willing to try, we have already conquered our fear. We can grow no matter what the outcome is.
What failure have I turned into success?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We cannot approach prayer as we do everything else in our push button, instant society. There are no prayer pills or enlightenment capsules. --Janie Gustafson
Prayer is the relationship between each man and his Higher Power. Our approach to this relationship is guided by our understanding of God. How other men and women have prayed and related to God throughout history may guide us today.
Any relationship is a process, not a momentary event with an instantaneous outcome. It builds with repeated contact and dialogue. With give and take, prayer is our honesty encountering God and our openness hearing God expressed on God's terms. Like any relationship, prayer includes all our feelings - anger, fear, and mistrust, as well as generosity, goodwill, and gratitude. Gradually, we see the events of our lives through the wisdom and detachment our spiritual relationship provides.
I return now to my dialogue with God, asking only for knowledge of God's will and the power to carry it out.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Women sometimes gossip when they want to get close to people. --Joan Gilbertson
Feeling alone and lonely heightens our fears of inadequacy. In our alienation from others, paranoia grips us. We yearn to feel connection with someone, and gossip about another someone can draw two lonely people close. We are bonded.
We need a sense of belonging, every one of us: belonging to the neighborhood; belonging to the staff where we work; belonging to the group we call friends. Knowing that we do belong fosters the inner warmth that accompanies security, well-being. And our fears are melted.
The program's Fifth, Ninth, and Tenth Steps guarantee that we'll feel the closeness we long for when we work them. Self-revelation strengthens our ties to the people we long to connect with Gossip loses its appeal when we know we share a closeness already. Mingling our vulnerabilities secures our closeness.
We need to be attentive to our judgments of others, be they verbalized in gossip or only savored in silence. These judgments act as barometers of our own self-image. Our security in knowing we belong, that we are one, relieves us of the need to judge others unfairly.
Loneliness pushes me to behavior that even compounds the loneliness. Real closeness will come when I talk about myself rather than someone else.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Powerlessness and Unmanageability
Willpower is not the key to the way of life we are seeking. Surrender is.
I have spent much of my life trying to make people be, do, or feel something they aren't, don't want to do, and choose not to feel. I have made them, and myself, crazy in that process, said one recovering woman.
I spent my childhood trying to make an alcoholic father who didn't love himself be a normal person who loved me. I then married an alcoholic and spent a decade trying to make him stop drinking.
I have spent years trying to make emotionally unavailable people be emotionally present for me.
I have spent even more years trying to make family members, who are content feeling miserable, happy. What Im saying is this: I've spent much of my life desperately and vainly trying to do the impossible and feeling like a failure when I couldn't. Its been like planting corn and trying to make the seeds grow peas. Wont work!
By surrendering to powerlessness, I gain the presence of mind to stop wasting my time and energy trying to change and control that which I cannot change and control. It gives me permission to stop trying to do the impossible and focus on what is possible: being who I am, loving myself, feeling what I feel, and doing what I want to do with my life.
In recovery, we learn to stop fighting lions, simply because we cannot win. We also learn that the more we are focused on controlling and changing others, the more unmanageable our life becomes. The more we focus on living our own life, the more we have a life to live, and the more manageable our life will become.
Today, I will accept powerlessness where I have no power to change things, and Ill allow my life to become manageable.
Today I will be gentle with myself as I meditate and look within. I will look at my inner self lovingly and without judgement as I find the blocks that have kept me stuck. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let the Past Slip Away
Gently, lovingly, leave past moments behind.
You can’t lose love. You don’t need to hang on so tightly. If the lesson has been learned, if it is time to move on, let the past slip away. Come into the present moment. Discover all that’s there for you. Clinging to the lessons, people, and feelings from yesterday will keep you tired, confused, and afraid.
Shed the tears that need to be shed. Feeling your grief will help you bring about your transformation.
Then say your good-byes. Be glad you had the experience you did. Be gratefu for all you’ve learned about yourself, about love. Then gently move into today.
Stop believing in loss. Start believing in life. Let the past slip away. Come gently into now.
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More language of letting go
Say when it’s time to seek shelter
There’s a saying that a boat may be safe when it’s in harbor, but that isn’t what boats were made for. But let’s not forget the value of safe harbors either. A wise sailor knows the limits of each boat and will seek shelter if the weather becomes more than it can bear.
Seeking out new experiences, meeting new people, living life to its fullest is one of the best reasons for being alive. The purpose of recovering from addictions and learning to take care of ourselves isn’t to keep us stuck perpetually in therapy. It’s to free us to live our lives. But we need to be aware of our limits. And there is no reason to put yourself into a situation of unnecessary risk.
Only you can be the judge of that in your life. We each have different levels of freedom and similar but unique needs. A strong ocean liner can weather much stronger storms than a small powerboat. You may be able to withstand more or less pressure than someone else. Push your limits occasionally; that’s how we grow and change. But know what those limits are, and be willing to seek shelter when the storms come.
You are not alone. Whether through meditation or prayer; secular or religious support groups. Twelve Step or self-help meetings, a harbor exists in which you can ride out the storms and remain strong to sail the exciting waters of life another day.
Do you know where your harbors are? Lives are meant to be lived, so live yours as fully as you can. But remember that you cannot live fully when you’re recovering from storm damage. Be bold, but be safe.
God, help me be aware during times of stress that a safe harbor exists.
Activity: List your safe harbors. Examples of this might be friendships that are completely safe and supportive, support groups, prayer, meditation, and places of worship. How often do you need to connect with these harbors to keep yourself in good shape? Be aware that when you go through periods of stress and distress– and these times appear frequently in our lives– you might need to seek extra shelter to keep yourself safe from the storm.
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Opening the Door
Fighting Against Our Gifts by Madisyn Taylor
To stop fighting your natural gifts listen to your internal voice and respond to the knocking universe at the door.
As human beings we often have a tendency to fight against using our natural gifts. Many stories of success start with an individual who is ignoring the call of his or her inborn abilities. There are many possible reasons for this resistance, from fear that the calling will be too difficult to a disbelief in the very work one is being asked to do. We may feel too small, too distracted by other people’s ideas about what we should do, or too uninformed. Whatever the case, the resistance to actualizing ourselves has very concrete consequences, and many of us have been called out of hiding by an illness or a twist of fate that unequivocally dismantled our resistance. In other the words, the universe knocks, and if we don’t answer it knocks louder.
For example, if you are meant to be a psychic or a medium, and you aren’t using that gift, you may get headaches. If you are meant to be a healer and are trying to be a lawyer, you may have trouble getting or keeping a job. This doesn’t mean that you can’t still be a lawyer, but perhaps integrating your gifts into your work is what is calling you. On the other hand, you may simply feel an underlying anxiety that you are not on the right path, doing the right thing. Pay attention to this feeling, and ask for guidance from the universe, being open to all its communications, from subtle internal yearnings to powerful dreams. As you begin to risk opening the door to your natural gifts, your life situation may shift in a powerful way. However, you may find that small steps in the right direction, such as taking a class or setting aside one night a week to paint or write, is enough for now.
The first step on the journey to our calling in life is to listen to our internal voices and respond to the knocking universe at the door. As we do, the symptoms and anxieties that have haunted us will fade into the background, replaced by opportunities, both big and small, to open the door to what we are truly here to do. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When we fist reached The Program and for the first time in our lives stood among people who seemed to understand, the sense of belonging was exhilarating. We felt that the problem of isolation had been solved. We soon discovered, however, that while we weren’t alone any more, in a social sense, we still suffered many of the old pangs of anxious apartness. Until we had talked with complete candor of our conflicts, and had listened to someone else do the same thing, we still didn’t belong. Step Five was the answer. Have I found through the Fifth step the beginning of true kinship with my fellows and God?
Today I Pray
May God help me learn to share myself, my attributes and my failings, not just as I take the Fifth Step but in a continuing give-and-take process with my friends. May I cultivate an attitude of openness and honesty with others, now that I have begun to be honest with myself. May I remember who I used to be — the child in a game of hide-and-seek, who hid so well that nobody could find her/him and everyone gave up trying and went home.
Today I Will Remember
I will be open to friendships.
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One More Day
There is a period of life when we swallow a knowledge of ourselves and it becomes either good or sour inside.
– Pearl Bailey
We have a tendency to hold on to those dreams, goals, and images we had when we were young. When we accept the reality of what our lives have become — good or bad — we are finally adult.
It’s far easier to accept external realities than our deeper, more personal internal realities. Accepting that we are never going to be tall or agile or rich is simpler than admitting that we are selfish or angry or unkind. Perhaps the external things are easier because there is nothing we can do to change them, and we resist admitting to character defects because those can be changed. We may not like what we see, but if we swallow that bitter pill we are able to change.
I will ignore my fear and admit to the good and bad within me. This gives me the freedom to change.
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Food For Thought
Quality, Not Quantity
We tend to be overly impressed with quantity. How much does it cost? How many friends do I have? How much can I include in my food plan? In a materialistic society, more is synonymous with better.
Before we found OA, we were eating more and enjoying it less. In fact, the more we ate, the more unhappy we became. Greater quantity did not bring better health or a better quality of life.
In this program, we are learning to place quality before quantity. We discover that smaller amounts of nourishing, high quality foods are more satisfying and make us feel better than vast quantities of empty calories. We become more selective about the way we spend our time, choosing the activities and companions that most enrich our lives, rather than trying to do everything and be everything to everybody. We realize more each day that the quality of our spiritual life is what gives us the inner satisfaction, which we sought but failed to find in quantities of things.
Show me how to live well.
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One Day At A Time
HIGHER POWER
"Think not because no man sees,
such things will remain unseen."
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Recently at a meeting I heard a person share that they weren't sure that the program would work for them because they did not believe in God. They were very distressed. I wanted to get out the Big Book and quote to them from page 47, "When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies too, to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book. Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him."
Many of us have a problem with God in the beginning of our program. We may be atheists, agnostics, or simply have had bad experiences regarding God or His/Her people. We can choose the group, or the Higher Power of another, to be our Higher Power until we are able to begin, bit-by-bit, to define and establish a relationship with our own Higher Power. I know that when I came into the program I was very angry with God. I used the group as my Higher Power at first. Then I used my sponsor's God of her understanding as my Higher Power because He was so loving and full of grace. We had many talks about her God. This helped me greatly until I was able to reconnect to my relationship with the God of my understanding. Today I have a full, rich and intimate relationship with my God.
One day at a time...
I will be tolerant of others' conception of their Higher Power and will continue to grow in my relationship with the God of my understanding.
~ Carolyn H.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
I saw that my friend was much more than inwardly reorganized. He was on a different footing. His roots grasped a new soil.
Despite the living example of my friend there remained in me the vestiges of my old prejudice. The word God still aroused a certain antipathy. When the thought was expressed that there might be a God personal to me this feeling was intensified. I didn't like the idea. I could go for such conceptions as Creative Intelligence, Universal Mind or Spirit of Nature but I resisted the thought of a Czar of the Heavens, however loving His sway might be. I have since talked with scores of men who felt the same way.
My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, 'WHY DON'T YOU CHOOSE YOUR OWN CONCEPTION OF GOD?' - Pgs. 11-12 - Bill's Story
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
We often feel tremendous remorse for transgressions of the past. Today, now, we can stay clean, stay sober, stay drug free. This is the beginning. Later in our program, we will work steps to neutralize our transgressions. But right now, we must heal our bodies first.
God, as I understand You, keep me clean and sober, now.
Lesson and Life
I recognize today that I am in charge of my own learning. Life is constantly offering up circumstances that are useful in my personal growth. I can move through the situation, live it out, extract the wisdom that is in it or repeat it over and over again, exhausting myself and learning very little. The deepest and most appropriate things I need to learn in life are generally right in front of me. Life is my guru if I can use it as such. It is rich with subtle learning if I look for it. The real achievement for me today is to learn to be in my own skin, to see truth in all that surrounds me, to know that placing value and judgment is pointless and illusory -- all of life is valuable.
- Tian Dayton PhD
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Anger is not a solution.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I will be gentle with myself as I meditate and look within. I will look at my inner self lovingly and without judgement as I find the blocks that have kept me stuck.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
I started my next big quest to avoid being an alcoholic; My first was self-knowledge, with therapy, now I began the quest of self-will. I drank 'til I didn't want to be a drunk, I overcame my drink problem with marijuana, I was victorious over marijuana with pills, I triumphed over pills with cocaine and then I drank until I didn't want to be a drunk. I swapped addictions and I used self-will to avoid catching alcoholism. - Scott R.
bluidkiti
05-23-2021, 07:49 AM
May 30
Daily Reflections
OUR PRIMARY PURPOSE
The more A.A. sticks to its primary purpose, the greater will be its helpful influence everywhere.
A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 109
It is with gratitude that I reflect on the early days of our Fellowship and those wise and loving "foresteppers" who proclaimed that we should not be diverted from our primary purpose, that of carrying the message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
I desire to impart respect to those who labor in the field of alcoholism, being ever mindful that A.A. endorses no causes other than its own. I must remember that A.A. has no monopoly on miracle making and I remain humbly grateful to a loving God who made A.A. possible.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I am part of A.A., one among many, but I am one. I need the A.A. principles for the development of the buried life within me. A.A. may be human in its organization, but it is Divine in its purpose. The purpose is to point me toward God and a better life. Participating in the privilege of the movement, I shall share in the responsibilities, taking it upon myself to carry my fair share of the load, not grudgingly but joyfully. To the extent that I fail in my responsibilities, A.A. fails. To the extent I succeed, A.A. succeeds. Do I accept this as my A.A. credo?
Meditation For The Day
"Praise the Lord." What does praising God mean? It means being grateful for all the wonderful things in the universe and for all the blessings in your life. So praise God by being grateful and humble. Praise of this kind has more power to vanquish evil than has mere resignation. The truly grateful and humble person who is always praising God, is not tempted to do wrong. You will have a feeling of security because you know that fundamentally all is well. So look up to God and praise Him.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be grateful for all my blessings. I pray that I may humble because I know that I do not deserve them.
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As Bill Sees It
No Boundaries, p. 150
Meditation is something which can always be further developed. It
has no boundaries, of width or height or depth. Aided by such
instruction and example as we can find, it is essentially an individual
adventure, something which each one of us works out in his own way.
But its object is always the same; to improve our conscious contact
with God, with His grace, wisdom, and love.
And let's always remember that meditation is in reality intensely
practical. One of its first fruits is emotional balance. With it we can
broaden and deepen the channel between ourselves and God as we
understand Him.
12 & 12, pp. 101-102
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Walk in Dry Places
Civilians who show resentments
Healthy Thinking
As compulsive people, we're urged to watch resentments carefully. These negative feelings can flare up out of nowhere and bring terrible destruction.
This sensitivity in spotting our own resentments also makes us more aware of resentments in others— perhaps people who are not alcoholics and thus are considered NORMAL. (Earth people I call them even if I doubt that anyone is really normal)
When this happens, we have no responsibility to point their resentment out to them. Our best approach is to deal with them as cordially as possible and to withdraw gracefully if their resentment is directed at us. This teaches us that resentment is a universal human problem— not just an affliction of alcoholics and other compulsive people.
While guarding against resentment in myself today, I'll not be surprised or hurt when it appears in others. If it does, I will not feel hurt or surprised, knowing that it's a human problem.
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Keep It Simple
One Day at a Time ---AA program slogan
One Day at a Time reminds us to live in a sane, natural way. It reminds us we can't control the past. It reminds us we can't control the future. We can live only in the present. We have only the moment. We have only today.
Before recovery, our worries about the past and the future put stress in our lives We need to live in a way that doesn't put us in danger. We need to live in a way that lets us enjoy things. We need to live in a way that lets us stay close to others, ourselves, and our Higher Power.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to really live One Day at a Time.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll keep reminding myself that I have the moment. No more, no less. Am I using my moments the way my Higher Power wants me to?
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Each Day a New Beginning
In anxiety-provoking situations, many women feel unable to act. They find themselves at a loss to come up with an effective response, or any response at all. --Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
Feeling unable to act is a humiliation, perhaps an embarrassment, and it is habit-forming. Perhaps our inertia is due to our need to act "correctly" and the accompanying fear that we'll err. Unfortunately, our fear of action reinforces itself. The only way to end the vicious cycle is to act--right or wrong. The surprise in store for us is that no action we take will be truly wrong. We will learn not only from the action itself, but from its ripples.
The response to life we make through action will gratify us; it will nourish us and will make us dread less the next situation that calls for a response.
Opportunities for action are the stepping stones to emotional maturity. The more we "act," the more able we are to act. And a new habit is formed.
Taking action, even when I fear it's wrong, is growth-producing. Without growth there is no life. Today, I will live!
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
Try not to condemn your alcoholic husband no matter what he says or does. He is just another very sick, unreasonable person. Treat him, when you can, as though he had pneumonia. When he angers you, remember that he is very ill.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
Nothing in their lives took precedence over their response to a call for help from some alcoholic in need. They would travel miles and stay up all night with someone they had never laid eyes on before and think nothing of it. Far from expecting praise for their deeds, they claimed the performance a privilege and insisted that they invariably received more than they gave. Extraordinary people!
p. 274
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Six - "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
Here are some of the things we dreamed. Hospitals didn't like alcoholics, so we thought we'd build a hospital chain of our own. People needed to be told what alcoholism was, so we'd educate the public, even rewrite school and medical textbooks. We'd gather up derelicts from skid rows, sort out those who could get well, and make it possible for the rest to earn their livelihood in a kind of quarantined confinement. Maybe these places would make large sums of money to carry on our other good works. We seriously thought of rewriting the laws of the land, and having it declared that alcoholics are sick people. No more would they be jailed; judges would parole them in our custody. We'd spill A.A. into the dark regions of dope addiction and criminality. We'd form groups of depressive and paranoid folks; the deeper the neurosis, the better we'd like it. It stood to reason that if alcoholism could be licked, so could any problem.
pp. 155-156
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"Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern
yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do."
--Pope John XXIII
"You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips."
--Goldsmith
"The value of all service lies in the spirit in which you serve and not in the importance or magnitude of the service. Even the lowliest task
or deed is made holy, joyous, and prosperous when it is filled with love."
--Charles Fillmore
"Integrity is telling myself the truth. Honesty is telling the truth to other people."
--Spencer Johnson
"A smile is the light in your window that tells others that there is a caring, sharing person inside."
--Denis Waitley
"When you talk, you can only say something that you already know. When you listen, you learn what someone else knows."
--Unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
POSTERITY
"We need to make a world in
which fewer children are
born, and in which we take
better care of them."
--Dr. George Wald
Spirituality is concerned for the physical. How we plant seeds, do exercises and develop a healthy food plan is as important as prayer, reading and meditation. The body is part of the soul.
Also we have a responsibility for the future; for those who follow us on this planet. The ecological welfare of our world is spiritual. An irresponsibility concerning childbirth reveals an arrogance that does not belong to the spiritual program. The satisfaction of our personal desires should never hurt the lives of others - including the unborn.
Teach me to have a spiritual responsibility to the future.
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This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.
1 John 1:5
All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16-17
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
Matthew 5:43-45
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Daily Inspiration
Look beyond people's behaviors and have compassion for what may be causing their insensitivities. Lord, I will not take everything personal because I don't know the weight of my neighbor's cross.
We are on earth to discover our own path and will never be happy trying to live someone else's idea of life. Lord, may I be happy with who I am and not evaluate myself in terms of someone else's success.
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NA Just For Today
Loneliness vs. Being Alone
"Sharing with others keeps us from feeling isolated and alone."
Basic Text, p. 81
There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. Being lonely is a state of the heart, an emptiness that makes us feel sad and sometimes hopeless. Loneliness is not always alleviated when we enter into relationships or surround ourselves with others. Some of us are lonely even in a room full of people.
Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous out of the desperate loneliness of our addiction. After coming to meetings, we begin to make new friends, and often our feelings of loneliness ease. But many of us must contend with loneliness throughout our recovery.
What is the cure for loneliness? The best cure is to begin a relationship with a Higher Power that can help fill the emptiness of our heart. We find that when we have a belief in a Higher Power, we never have to feel lonely. We can be alone more comfortably when we have a conscious contact with a God of our understanding.
We often find deep fulfillment in our interactions with others as we progress in our recovery. Yet we also find that, the closer we draw to our Higher Power, the less we need to surround ourselves with others. We begin to find a spirit within us that is our constant companion as we continue to explore and deepen our connection with a Power greater than ourselves. We realize we are spiritually connected with something bigger than we are.
Just for today: I will take comfort in my conscious contact with a Higher Power. I am never alone.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The cut worm forgives the plow. --William Blake
Would anyone believe that rain abuses grass, or accuse roots, hungry for a better hold on life, of digging too far into earth's flesh? And if the earth should have to quake, would anyone blame it for cracking here and there? Look closely at the small world of busy life overturned in the garden each spring. No ant there curses another bug, and no worm curses itself. Though they can neither speak nor think, even small creatures know enough to accept their pain as a natural part of life.
Why, then, should we waste time blaming others, or ourselves, for the natural sensations of life?
In the process of new growth, can we expect no pain?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A frontier is never a place; it is a time and a way of life. Frontiers pass, but they endure in their people. --Hal Borland
Frontiers are borders, and in our development we meet them again and again. Our first loves as teenagers were emotional and spiritual frontiers. Leaving home after childhood was another. Becoming a father, perhaps another. Some frontiers are very generous and exciting, while others are frightening, dangerous. Certainly this program has been a frontier for us.
To stay alive spiritually we need to continually go to the borders of our experience - or go back and face an old one from a new angle. We may encounter a new border in learning God's will for us in a new way, or in learning a new handicraft or sport, or meeting a life experience we didn't expect. We accumulate these memories within us. Some frontiers from long ago exist within us as if they were just yesterday. What frontiers stand out in our lives as we look back? What spiritual learning came from them? This is how we grow as men.
I am grateful for past frontiers that endure within me. They have strengthened and deepened my manhood.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
In anxiety-provoking situations, many women feel unable to act. They find themselves at a loss to come up with an effective response, or any response at all. --Stanlee Phelps and Nancy Austin
Feeling unable to act is a humiliation, perhaps an embarrassment, and it is habit-forming. Perhaps our inertia is due to our need to act "correctly" and the accompanying fear that we'll err. Unfortunately, our fear of action reinforces itself. The only way to end the vicious cycle is to act--right or wrong. The surprise in store for us is that no action we take will be truly wrong. We will learn not only from the action itself, but from its ripples.
The response to life we make through action will gratify us; it will nourish us and will make us dread less the next situation that calls for a response.
Opportunities for action are the stepping stones to emotional maturity. The more we "act," the more able we are to act. And a new habit is formed.
Taking action, even when I fear it's wrong, is growth-producing. Without growth there is no life. Today, I will live!
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Commitment
As we walk through life, there are many things and people we may lose, or lose out on, if we are unwilling to commit. We need to make a commitment for relationships to grow beyond the dating stage, to have the home or apartment we want, the job we want, or the car we desire.
We must commit, on deep levels, to careers, to goals, to family, friends, and recovery. Trying something will not enable us to succeed. Committing ourselves will.
Yet, we need never commit before we are ready.
Sometimes, our fear of commitment is telling us something. We may not want to commit to a particular relationship, purchase, or career. Other times, it is a matter of our fears working their way out. Wait, then. Wait until the issue becomes clear.
Trust yourself. Ask your Higher Power to remove your fear of commitment. Ask God to remove your blocks to commitment. Ask God for guidance.
Ask yourself if you are willing to lose what you will not commit to. Then listen, quietly. And wait until a decision seems consistently right and comfortable.
We need to be able to commit, but we need never commit until we are ready.
Trust that you will commit when you want to.
God, guide me in making my commitments. Give me the courage to make those that are right for me, the wisdom to not commit to that which does not feel right, and the patience to wait until I know.
I am putting a large STOP sign to all my negative self-talk today. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Open Your Heart
She laughed so much she made me giggle. “Do you laugh and smile all the time?” I asked the woman. “Are you this happy all the time?”
“My heart is open and healed,” she said. “I laugh a lot. But I cry a lot,too.”
An open heart feels all it needs to feel. Cry when it hurts. At the end of your tears, you will see more clearly, Tears clear our eyes and our heart. Cry whenever you need to.
Laugh often, as often as you can. Laugh with friends. Laugh out loud. The discoveries, the growth, the insights, the closeness, the sharing, the learning don’t have to be such serious, somber events. Truth is discovered most often in laughter. Bonds are formed. Love becomes unveiled.
Cry a lot. Laugh a lot. Let life reveal its mysteries to you. Let love find you, course through you, touch all you meet through your laughter and tears. The fortunate person is not the one who wins the lottery. That’s luck. We find fortune when we open our hearts and learn the secret of life.
Laughter and tears are the signs of an open heart.
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More language of letting go
Give yourself time
Set deadlines. Say when. Stop waiting for that perfect time. Be gentle with yourselves and others.
Too much waiting is a trap. Waiting, counting the days, months, years, waiting for someone or something outside of ourselves to make us happy and magically bring us what we want is a pit. If you fall into it, climb out.
But be gentle with yourself,too. If you’re tackling something new– whether it’s learning a new craft, beginning a new relationship, or recovering from alcoholism or codependency, give yourself time to reach your goals, to begin to get it, to understand.
Some revelations, insights, and illuminations are received in a moment, a second. But the work of assimilating new ideas and translating them into lifestyle changes takes time.
A friend of mine called me one day. He had lost his best friend and roommate to a sudden illness three months earlier. “What’s wrong with me?” he said. “My spiritual beliefs are intact. I work hard on myself. Yet I break down crying, for no reason. I’m a wreck. Why aren’t I over this yet?”
“Because it takes time,” I said. “Give that gift to yourself.”
The seeds of change grow gently, sometimes almost imperceptibly. Birth takes time. Transformation takes time.
You are being transformed and reborn.
Give yourself and others the gift of time.
God, help me let go of unrealistic expectations of how quickly I, or others, need to grow and change. Help me know that I have all the time I need.
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Fill Yourself from the Inside Out
Tending Your Own Energy Field by Madisyn Taylor
The very best way to tend to your own energy field is to spread your own heart light and fill yourself up.
Life presents us with many opportunities to gain mastery in tending our own energy fields. At times we may want to protect ourselves by using energy shields of color, light or angelic presence. Or in order to become more grounded, we may run energy down through our feet or first chakra, rooting ourselves to the earth. Sometimes it’s appropriate to play openly with others in an expansive, flowing state; and at other times, we may want to limit our availability to a chosen few. In certain public environments such as graduation ceremonies, work conventions, or even weddings, it may be important to remain open-hearted and able to connect, while still preventing our individual systems from depletion or overwhelm. In these situations, rather than putting a barrier between ourselves and the world around us, we can fill our energy fields from the inside out. In doing this, we become so filled with our own personal energy that no room is left for outside influences or discordant ener! gy to enter in and affect us.
When you need to connect with people on a one-to-one basis, separate from the bustling environment around you, here is a visualization technique you might try. You can start in the morning and repeat any time as needed. Begin by taking a few moments to breathe deeply and relax. When you are calm and present, envision a ball of light in your solar plexus area just above your belly button. Allow it to build there, growing stronger and stronger. Eventually, allow the light to expand throughout the rest of your body until it fills your entire physical and energetic field.
By filling yourself with your own energy in this way, you become fortified with your own power. You retain access to all of your intuitive and mental abilities. And, you are able to act from a loving space in the midst of any situation. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Since I’ve been in The Program, I’ve learned to redefine love. I’ve come to understand, for example, that sometimes it’s necessary to place love ahead of indiscriminate “factual honesty.” No longer, under the guise of “perfect honesty,” can I cruelly and unnecessarily hurt others. Today, I always must ask myself, “What’s the best and most loving thing I can do?” Have I begun to sow the seeds of love in my daily living?
Today I Pray
May God, in His live, show me how to be loving. May I first sense the feelings of love and caring within me and then find ways to show those feelings. May I remember how many times I cut myself off from relationships because I did not know how either to let myself feel love or to show what I did feel.
Today I Will Remember
When I feel love, I will be loving.
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One More Day
I expect to pass through life but once. If, therefore, there can be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow human being, let me do it now.
– William Penn
Each night, as we place our heads upon our pillows, we can think back over the day and remember the things we said or did that added pleasure to others’ lives. Usually, those same words and actions add joy to our lives too.
During our lives we have passed by multiple opportunities to be kind to others — there are no second chances. But what we can do is be aware of those special opportunities now and make the very best of them.
My new awareness of life’s fleeting opportunities will help me show my kinder side more often.
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Food For Thought
Be Good to Yourself
Stuffing ourselves with food which our bodies did not need was not being good to ourselves, nor did it solve our problems. Overeating simply added another problem to the ones we already had.
In the past, when we thought about diets, we may have considered them to be the punishment, which we had to undergo in order to get rid of the fat we had acquired. Taking that attitude was not being good to ourselves, either. It is one reason why diets invariably fail, since few of us are willing to endure punishment indefinitely.
The OA program is not a diet but a way of life. It is a way, which has worked because it is a positive plan, not a negative restriction. We determine what it is that our bodies need to look and function at their best, and we decide to eat that and nothing else. We are good to our bodies. We also consider what our minds, hearts, and spirits need to function at their best, and we decide that the love and care of a Higher Power is crucial. By working the Twelve Steps, we are good to ourselves.
Thank You for the life that You have given me to live.
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One Day At A Time
“A person can run for years but sooner or later
he has to take a stand in the place which, for better or worse,
he calls home, do what he can to change things there.”
Paule Marshall
I’ve been running for most of my life. I was in a hurry to grow up. As a kid, all I wanted was to grow up and move out. I was so sick of everything and everyone in my life. I didn't want to be told what to do. I wanted to be able to call the shots. Then, when I grew up, I wanted to be a kid again. I wanted people to tell me what to do and to take care of me. When I was calling the shots, I found myself in bars and eating out all the time because I didn’t want to go to the grocery store or cook. The only foods I kept in my studio apartment were binge foods. I lived in a very urban area and could very easily walk to fast food or to convenience stores. I didn't know what home meant. When I’m running, I get out of breath, my body hurts, my soul hurts, and I have no space for my Higher Power to guide me. I run laps in the same place, expecting to feel better, but never feeling better.
As a relative newcomer to program, I have made a conscious choice to stop. I turned it over to my Higher Power and asked for guidance in finding home and staying there. Now, as I am standing in place, I find that my home is my Higher Power. Standing in place, I've found that the world isn't as adverse as I'd perceived it to be. I can actually see the beauty in the world around me and feel nurtured by the feeling of home.
One day at a time...
Today I can stand in place and look around. I can be aware of the ever-loving presence of my Higher Power and the comfort of the home that have both been with me all along.
~ AJ
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
It boils right down to this: No man should be fired just because he is alcoholic. If he wants to stop, he should be afforded a real chance. If he cannot or does not want to stop, he should be discharged. The exceptions are few.
We think this method of approach will accomplish several things. It will permit the rehabilitation of good men. At the same time you will feel no reluctance to rid yourself of those who cannot or will not stop. - Pg. 148 - To Employers
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
As your are welcomed, you must welcome other addicts seeking help. Find someone today to share with. Remember: we teach best what we most need to learn. Sharing is the most important principle our program is built on and we begin every day on this principle.
God, as I understand You, help me begin this day by sharing what I've learned up to now. May everyday in my sobriety include sharing.
Amends
Today, I am willing for healing to take place in ruptured relationships. I have been doing the best that I can. My acknowledgment that I may have hurt someone else does not diminish me. I have also been hurt, and I extend the same understanding to myself that I do to others. We have all been doing the best that we knew how with the awareness we had to work with. My willingness to make amends speaks to my spiritual growth and desire for honesty. Making amends to others sets things straight with myself. My self-respect is growing to the extent that I am no longer comfortable with unfinished business. I will finish up my side for my own self and allow the rest to be where it is. It is for myself that I forgive; I do not need to control the result.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Although loving and being loved is an important aspect of balance in our lives-relationships are never the solution to drinking and other drug taking. We sometimes focus on the strong emotion of love from another rather than face loving ourselves by working the program.
Today I 'act as if' I am worth loving.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
All it takes to start a new meeting is a resentment and a coffeepot.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
I am putting a large STOP sign to all my negative self-talk today.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
My father was the kind of drunk who made anybody you put next to him look sober. Nobody really knew my mother was alcoholic until my father died - You can't see the moon while the sun's out. - Angie D.
bluidkiti
05-23-2021, 07:50 AM
May 31
Daily Reflections
READINESS TO SERVE OTHERS
. . . our Society has concluded that it has but one high mission--to
carry the A.A. message to those who don't know there's a way out.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 151
The "Light" to freedom shines bright on my fellow alcoholics as each
one of us challenges the other to grow. The "Steps" to self-
improvement have small beginnings, but each Step builds the "ladder"
out of the pit of despair to new hope. Honesty becomes my "tool" to
unfurl the "chains" which bound me. A sponsor, who is a caring
listener, can help me to truly hear the message guiding me to freedom.
I ask God for the courage to live in such a way that the Fellowship
may be a testimony to His favor. This mission frees me to share my
gifts of wellness through a spirit of readiness to serve others.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I shall not wait to be drafted for service to A.A. I Shall volunteer. I
shall be loyal in my attendance, generous in my giving, kind in my
criticism, creative in my suggestions, loving in my attitudes. I shall give
to A.A. my interest, my enthusiasm, my devotion, and most of all,
myself. Do I also accept this as my AA. credo?
Meditation For The Day
Prayer is of many kinds, but of whatever kind, prayer is the linking up
of the soul and mind to God. So, if prayer is only a glance of faith, a
look or a word of love, or just a feeling of confidence in the goodness
and purpose in the universe, still the result of that prayer is added
strength to meet all temptations and to overcome them. Even if no
supplication is expressed, all the supply of strength that is necessary is
secured, because the soul, being linked and united to God, receives
from Him all spiritual help needed. The soul, when in its human body,
still needs the things belonging to its heavenly habitation.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may be taught how to pray. I pray that I may be linked
through prayer to the mind and will of God.
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As Bill Sees It
Start by Forgiving, p. 151
The moment we ponder a twisted or broken relationship with another
person, our emotions go on the defensive. To escape looking at the
wrongs we have done another, we resentfully focus on the wrong he
has done us. Triumphantly we seize upon his slightest misbehavior as
the perfect excuse for minimizing or forgetting our own.
Right here we need to fetch ourselves up sharply. Let's remember
that alcoholics are not the only ones bedeviled by sick emotions. In
many instances we are really dealing with fellow sufferers, people
whose woes we have increased.
If we are about to ask forgiveness for ourselves, why shouldn't we
start out by forgiving them, one and all?
12 & 12, p. 78
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Walk in Dry Places
Are Sobriety Dates Important?
Practical Thinking
Observing anniversaries of getting sober has become a time-honored custom in AA. Many group name lists include the individual members' sobriety dates. It's also customary in many groups to celebrate anniversaries with cakes and to award coins with numerals denoting years of sobriety.
To outsiders, this custom may seem frivolous. What is the benefit in celebrating the day one too the last drink or in adding up the number of sober years?
These celebrations of sobriety dates actually underscore the important goal of staying continuously sober. We may know alcoholics who "went back out" from time to time, and then failed to come back at all. Members who slip and do come back to tell us that it was an agonizing experience, and that they feared they wouldn't have another chance to lead a sober life. We also hear people say: "I may have another drunk in me, but I'm not sure I can find another sobering up."
The message is clear: Get sober mark that date, and continue to build on it. We stress the importance of sobriety when we acknowledge the importance of sobriety dates.
I'll stay sober today. Whatever my length of sobriety, I want to honor it and build on it.
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Keep It Simple
You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.---Ethel Barrymore
There was a time when we wouldn't let anyone laugh at us---even ourselves. We had to much shame. We had to much pain. We took the world too seriously. If we laughed it was at others---not at ourselves. Over time , real honest laughter returns to us. Laughter is a way of accepting ourselves as human. To be human means we can make mistakes. It means we can lighten up. It also means growing up. And growing up means being happy with all of who we are---even parts of us that may seem odd or funny. If we can't laugh at ourselves, we shut ourselves off from the world. We shut ourselves off from the parts of us we need to accept. Am I willing to accept the fact that I'm human.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You made laughter. Help me us it to make my life easier. Help me accept all of me a funny mistake I've made.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll share with someone close to me a funny mistake I've made.
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Each Day a New Beginning
That reality of life and living--movement from one place to another either in a project or in a state of mind, does not conform with what we imagine or expect or think we deserve so we often leave things hanging unfinished or unstarted. --Sandra Edwards
Being dissatisfied--discontented with the experiences life gives us - forever hampers our growth. Reality is not our bane but our gift. The particular reality perceived by any one of us is of special significance because in that reality are our lessons--the very lessons that will awaken us to the awareness that what life offers is just what we deserve, and more.
It's our interpretation of life's realities that is at fault. But as we grow, spiritually, the clouds will disappear. We'll come to understand the interplay between our realities. And we'll willingly move ahead, fulfilling our part in life's bigger picture.
Sometimes all I can do is trust that all is well, even though it's not as I had hoped. On bad days I need only to reflect on the past to know that I am moving in the right direction.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 8 - TO WIVES
There is an important exception to the foregoing. We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference. An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head. Don't let him get away with it. If you are positive he is one of this type you may feel you had better leave him. Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children? Especially when he has before him a way to stop his drinking and abuse if he really wants to pay the price.
p. 108
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
The Keys Of The Kingdom
This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many.
I didn't dare hope I might find for myself all that these people had found, but if I could acquire some small part of their intriguing quality of living---and sobriety that would be enough.
p. 274
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Tradition Six - "An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose."
It occurred to us that we could take what we had into the factories and cause laborers and capitalists to love each other. Our uncompromising honesty might soon clean up politics. With one arm around the shoulder of medicine, we'd resolve their differences. Having learned to live so happily, we'd show everybody else how. Why, we thought, our Society of Alcoholics Anonymous might prove to be the spearhead of a new spiritual advance! We might transform the world.
p. 156
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How can we possibly describe feeling the Presence of God? It is the difference between being a child left alone in an empty house at night and a child who knows that her mother is in the next room. Even though she can't see or hear her mother, she feels comforted by her warm, loving, protective presence. And while a human parent can't always be with us, our spiritual parent will never abandon us.
--Mary Manin Morrissey
"A good love relationship can reinforce self-esteem, but it cannot
create it. Many people carry a lot of unfinished business from
childhood into relationships, and look to their partners to fulfill their
unmet needs. So you get immature, dependency-type relationships that
tend not to work.
The more you can complete unfinished business from childhood, the
better your chance in relationships as an adult."
--Nathaniel Branden, The Art of Living Consciously
Life's lessons are not taught in classrooms.
--unknown
Forgiveness is an inner correction that lightens the heart. It is for our peace of mind first. Being at peace, we will now have peace to give to others, and this is the most permanent and valuable gift we can possibly give."
--Gerald Jampolsky
"Character is defined by what we are willing to do when the spotlight is
turned off, when the applause has died down, and no one is around to
give us credit."
--Unknown
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
AMBITION
"Show me a thoroughly satisfied
man - and I will show you a
failure."
--Thomas Alva Edison
I need to strive for new things in my life. I need to push out into new
areas and discover the richness of God's world. I need to explore the
varied creativity of creation.
There is so much that I have not done because of the wasted years of
my addiction. So much that I have not seen, countries that I have not
visited, languages that I have not learned and experiences that I have
missed. My compulsive and obsessive behavior left me a prisoner of
self - and also a victim of self.
The spiritual recovery I enjoy today says it is okay for me to have
things, enjoy things and do things.
Help me to realize the energy and ambition You have created within
me.
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While we have opportunity, let us do good to all men, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.
Galatians 6:10
"Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you.
Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you
know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain."
I Corinthians 15:58
"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the
LORD."
Psalm 27:14
"I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope."
Psalm 130:5
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Daily Inspiration
To feel good about yourself, do things that really matter to you. Lord, help me to know my priorities and act in a manner that will fulfill them.
Loneliness happens when you build walls instead of bridges. Lord, bless me with a welcoming spirit for those that might need me today.
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NA Just For Today
Keep It Simple
"We live a day at a time but also from moment to moment. When we stop living in the here and now, our problems become magnified unreasonably."
Basic Text, p. 96
Life often seems too complicated to understand, especially for those of us who've dodged it for so long. When we stopped using drugs, many of us came face to face with a world that was confusing, even terrifying. Looking at life and all its details, all at once, may be overwhelming. We think that maybe we can't handle life after all and that it's useless to try. These thoughts feed themselves, and pretty soon we're paralyzed by the imagined complexity of life.
Happily, we don't have to fix everything at once. Solving a single problem seems possible, so we take them one at a time. We take care of each moment as it comes, and then take care of the next moment as it comes. We learn to stay clean just for today, and we approach our problems the same way. When we live life in each moment, it's not such a terrifying prospect. One breath at a time, we can stay clean and learn to live.
Just for today: I will take comfort in my conscious contact with a Higher Power. I am never alone.
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. --Antoine de St. Exupery
A tuning fork is a small tool that is used to tune musical instruments. It is tapped softly and then set down. As it vibrates, it gives off a musical tone. When its vibrations perfectly match the vibrations of the note played on the instrument, the instrument is in tune. When the note matches the tuning fork, this can be both felt and heard.
Our hearts work like a tuning fork. When the heart feels completely in tune with a decision or thought or action in our lives, then we know it is the right one for us. We can actually feel the harmony inside our bodies.
Sometimes what we know deep in our hearts gets clouded over by doubts and questions and other people's opinions and judgments. We need to clear away such clouds and listen to our hearts, for our hearts carry the wisdom of God.
Am I in tune with my heart today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Compassion is the ultimate and most meaningful embodiment of emotional maturity. It is through compassion that a person achieves the highest peak and deepest reach in his or her search for self-fulfillment. --Arthur Jersild
Being compassionate is similar to what we call support in this program. We get outside our own self-centered egos and care about someone beyond ourselves. In the process we are helped and changed - perhaps more than the person we are helping.
As we mature, we learn that not all help is beneficial. It is more helpful to confront a friend in his delusion than to accept his misguided actions. Such tough honesty supports his strength and his ability to work the Steps. Sometimes it is hard to be a friend to a man in great pain. We might prefer to pull away rather than be with him as he suffers, but we can be more compassionate if we accept our powerlessness to cure his pain. Compassion has a reverberating effect in relationships. Not only do we give it and grow from the experience, we also become the receivers of what we send out.
Today, I will practice compassion in my relationships.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
That reality of life and living--movement from one place to another either in a project or in a state of mind, does not conform with what we imagine or expect or think we deserve so we often leave things hanging unfinished or unstarted. --Sandra Edwards
Being dissatisfied--discontented with the experiences life gives us - forever hampers our growth. Reality is not our bane but our gift. The particular reality perceived by any one of us is of special significance because in that reality are our lessons--the very lessons that will awaken us to the awareness that what life offers is just what we deserve, and more.
It's our interpretation of life's realities that is at fault. But as we grow, spiritually, the clouds will disappear. We'll come to understand the interplay between our realities. And we'll willingly move ahead, fulfilling our part in life's bigger picture.
Sometimes all I can do is trust that all is well, even though it's not as I had hoped. On bad days I need only to reflect on the past to know that I am moving in the right direction.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
What If?
I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.
What if he doesn't handle it very well? I asked.
Then, my friend replied, you're going to have to handle it well.
What if's can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else's hands. What if's are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.
What if's are also a clue that we may be wondering whether we can trust ourselves and our Higher Power to do what's best for us. These are shreds of codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, and they signal fear.
The reactions, feelings, like or dislikes of others don't have to control our behaviors, feelings, and direction. We don't need to control how others react to our choices. We can trust ourselves, with help from a Higher Power, to handle any outcome - even the most uncomfortable. And, my friend, we can trust ourselves to handle it well.
Today, I will not worry about other peoples reactions, or events outside of my control. Instead, I will focus on my reactions. I will handle my life well today and trust that, tomorrow, I can do the same.
Today I continue to remove any barriers that keep me from being fully who I am in this universe. As I continue to trust my inner guidance, I receive all the inspiration I need to grow in courage and faith and love. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Let Yourself Be Alive
In Sedona, as I drove from the sweat lodge back to the room I was renting. I felt exhilarated. My excitement wasn’t only about the experience I had just been through. For so long I had limited my choices, limited my freedom. I was thrilled that I was finally giving myself permission to live more fully.
Have you been limiting your choices, telling yourself there are only a few options available? Have you been limiting your choices, saying you’ve seen and done everything you can in this world? Have you been limiting yourself and your life, then wondering why life is so limiting?
Set yourself free. Give yourself permission to experience and taste more of life. You are here to live your life– fully, richly, passionately. The journey has been about more than cleansing, healing, and spiritual growth. You have a body, emotions, passion, and thought. You are here to bring all parts to life, to connect the parts, and to fully live your life.
Partake of the abundance of the universe. You’re sitting at a banquet table. Let yourself feast. Move on from monitoring, watching, limiting. Experience all of life that you can.
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More language of letting go
Let go of timing
“Melody, it just isn’t time yet,” my friend Virginia said to me one day. “You wouldn’t be out on your lawn trying to pull the blades of the grass up, forcing them to grow.”
“Yes, I would,” I said, “if I thought it would help.”
Persistence, determination, clarity, and commitment can be our greatest assets. We gather energy, we use our determination to get things done– whether it’s cleaning our house, visiting a therapist for help with an issue that’s become more than we can handle alone, looking for a new job, or beginning a relationship.
Goals are good. Setting our sights on the task ahead is helpful.
So is letting go, and working with the seasons of our lives.
We are one with everything that is. The same energy and spirit that permeates the ocean, the mountains, the forest, and the creatures also permeates us. Who are we to think that we don’t have our rhythms, seasons, and cycles.
Who are we not to trust the rhythms of life?
Plant the seeds. Water them, if there’s a drought. But let it go. The grass will grow itself.
God, help me let go of impatience. Help me align myself with the natural cycles of my life. Help me trust your timing in my life.
Activity: Pick one segment of nature and study it. Maybe you’ll choose the sunrise and the sunset. Or choose a favorite park. Or the ocean. Even a lake will do. Don’t just think about it. Actually do it, for your meditation time today. Spend ten minutes to half an hour just sitting with and contemplating a segment of nature that speaks to you.
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Going with the Flow
Working with a Larger Energy by Madisyn Taylor
Going with the flow means we are open to multiple ways of getting where we want to be.
The expression going with the flow is a metaphor that applies to navigating a river. When we go with the flow, we follow the current of the river rather than push against it. People who go with the flow may be interpreted as lazy or passive, but to truly go with the flow requires awareness, presence, and the ability to blend one’s own energy with the prevailing energy. Going with the flow doesn’t mean we toss our oars into the water and kick back in the boat, hoping for the best. Going with the flow means we let go of our individual agenda and notice the play of energy all around us. We tap into that energy and flow with it, which gets us going where we need to go a whole lot faster than resistance will.
Going with the flow doesn’t mean that we don’t know where we’re going; it means that we are open to multiple ways of getting there. We are also open to changing our destination, clinging more to the essence of our goal than to the particulars. We acknowledge that letting go and modifying our plans is part of the process. Going with the flow means that we are aware of an energy that is larger than our small selves and we are open to working with it, not against it.
Many of us are afraid of going with the flow because we don’t trust that we will get where we want to go if we do. This causes us to cling to plans that aren’t working, stick to routes that are obstructed, and obsess over relationships that aren’t fulfilling. When you find yourself stuck in these kinds of patterns, do yourself a favor and open to the flow of what is rather than resisting it. Trust that the big river of your life has a plan for you and let it carry you onward. Throw overboard those things that are weighing you down. Be open to revising your maps. Take a deep breath and move into the current. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
Giving love is a fulfillment in itself. It must not matter whether love is returned or not. If I give love only to get a respons3e on my terms, my live is cancelled out by my motives. If i have the capacity to give love, then any return I get for it is a special bonus. It is through giving love, freely and without expectation of return, that we find ourselves and build ourselves spiritually. Have I begun to believe, in the words of Goethe, that “Love does not dominate; it cultivates?
Today I Pray
May I, the inveterate people-leaser and approval-seeker, know that the only real love does not ask for love back. May God be patient as I try to practice this principle. May I rid myself of pride that throws itself in the way of love. May I discard my silly cat-and-mouse games that have no place in real love.
Today I Will Remember
I will not give love to get love.
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One More Day
Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.
– Arnold Glasow
Good friends laughing together can warm the heart of even a casual onlooker. Unlike medicine, laughter cost us nothing and can be partaken of as often as we see fit.
When illness clouds our lives, it’s nice to know that one thing stays the same — we can still laugh. At ourselves. With friends. At a funny television program.
A good healthy laugh is therapy for our minds and bodies. Mirthful laughter can cause a remarkable feeling of well-being and joy. Laughter loosens all the cares and woes of the day and makes them somehow easier to bear.
Laughing openly and spontaneously will always make me feel better.
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Food For Thought
Friends Are For Helping
Now that we have found our place in a fellowship of sympathetic friends, we no longer need to be lonely. We have friends who understand us, even though we may only know their first names. Since we are all compulsive overeaters, we share similar experiences and feelings.
Reaching out to others in the program helps us to better understand and accept ourselves. The new life OA gives us needs to be shared in order to be kept. Calling newcomers, sharing transportation, keeping in touch with someone who is having trouble - these contacts strengthen our defenses against old habits and prevent us from slipping back into loneliness. The friends we make through OA are related to us by a deep spiritual bond.
When we are in trouble, we should not be too proud to ask for help. We cannot control this disease by ourselves. Our phone call to another member in time of difficulty is not an imposition but another link in the chain of mutual support.
May I be a giver and receiver of help and friendship.
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One Day At A Time
THE TITANIC
“Men at some time are masters of their fates.”
William Shakespeare
Our early days in OA can be compared to being a passenger on the Titanic. As we took our beloved and wonderfully-powerful first three steps, we were taking a voyage. In Step One we realized we were on the Titanic and that we were doomed. In Step Two we spotted a lifeboat. And in Step Three we took our seats in the lifeboat.
My voyage began with Step One when I realized the connection between the weight I was carrying and some health issues I had last year. I had developed "pitting edema" in both ankles. That was a sign of congestive heart failure. I was on the Titanic! In addition to my physical health condition, I discovered that my inner-health was also challenged. I had lived my life filled with resentments and negative thinking which ate at my very being. I had lost much of my spiritual strength and was in need of spiritual renewal. I was indeed a passenger on my own personal Titanic.
My voyage continued with Step Two. I can't even remember how I found The Recovery Group online, but I know that my Higher Power must have brought me here. Though I didn't believe at that time what the fellowship said in the meetings, I "acted as if" I believed my Higher Power could relieve me of these horrible compulsions to overeat and to live in resentment and negativity. That was all it took. I had spotted the lifeboat and was "acting as if" I believed it had come for me.
I was being changed. My early days of abstinence were difficult, but achievable. I had gotten into the lifeboat. I will always remember where I was when I suddenly realized that God had relieved me of the compulsion to eat between meals and at night. That realization had a huge impact on me. That day I took my seat on the lifeboat. I have been blessed with so much recovery. The ride I am on in this lifeboat isn't a free ride; it requires that I work this program on a daily basis. But when I consider the alternative, I love the ride I am on and I truly cherish the passengers with whom I am sharing this boat!
One day at a time...
I will cherish the lifeboat that this program has given me.
~ Karen A.
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
The less people tolerated us, the more we withdrew from society, from life itself. As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. It thickened, ever becoming blacker. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval. Momentarily we did - then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen - Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair. Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand! - Pg. 151 - A Vision For You
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Often times late at night, we fear that someone might break in, spirits might invade our body, or that our heart may stop beating. At these times we must turn to our Higher Power, surrender our fears and our fate. In that surrender, we cease struggling, cease fear.
In order for my Spiritual Source to guide me, I cease struggling ( which means getting my will for me ) and surrender my fear and my fate.
Owning My Own Anger Responsibly
Today, I am willing to take responsibility for the anger that I carry within me. I am not a bad person because I feel angry. No one wants to think of himself or herself as an angry person, and I am no exception. But when I refuse to acknowledge the anger and resentment that I have stored within me, (1) I turn my back on me and refuse to accept a very important part of myself, and (2) I ask the people close to me to hold my feelings for me, to be the containers of my unconscious or the feelings inside me that I do not wish to see. Because I deny my anger to myself does not mean that it goes away. Today, I am willing to consider that there might be something more to it, that I may be carrying feelings of anger that I need to accept.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
It's not your Higher Power's Will that makes you miserable. It's your resistance to HP's Will that causes the damage. Turning it over will set you right again.
God's will is when I turn it over. Self-will is when I've over turned it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Law of Sobriety: You can't fall off the floor.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
Today I continue to remove any barriers that keep me from being fully who I am in this universe. As I continue to trust my inner guidance, I receive all the inspiration I need to grow in courage and faith and love.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
Resentment is a poison I take to hurt you. - Unknown origin.
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