Just for Today

[MajestyJo]

Just for today my thoughts will be on my recovery, living and enjoying life without the use of drugs.

Just for today I will have faith in someone in NA who believes in me and wants to help me in my recovery.

Just for today I will have a program. I will try to follow it to the best of my ability.

Just for today through NA I will try to get a better perspective on my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid, my thoughts will be on my new associations, people who are not using and who have found a new way of life. So long as I follow that way, I have nothing to fear.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/christmas-angels-2/0010.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just for today I will try to live through this day only & not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

Just for today I will adjust myself to what is & not try to adjust everything else to my desires. I will take my “luck” as it comes & fit myself into it.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study; I will learn something useful; I will not be a mental loafer; I will read something that requires effort, thought & concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn & not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count; I will do at least two things I don’t want to do–just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as good as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, not find fault with anything & not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself.

Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry & indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself & relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. I will enjoy that which is beautiful & will believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/christmas-angels-2/0003.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just for today, ...
I will live through the next 12 hours
and not try to tackle all of life's problems at once.
I will improve my mind. I will learn something useful.
I will learn something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.
I will be agreeable. I will look my best,
speak in well-modulated voice, be courteous and considerate.
I will not find fault with friend, relative or colleague.
I will not try to change or improve anyone other than myself.
I will have a program. I might not follow it exactly, but I will have it.
I will save myself from two enemies, hurry and indecision.
I will do a good deed and keep it secret.
If anyone finds out, it won't count.
I will do two things I don't want to do, just for exercise.
I will believe in myself. I will give my best to the world
and feel confident that the world will give its best to me.

Original source unknown to me

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/christmas-angels-2/0004.gif

[MajestyJo]

I think this is my favourite piece of prose. It is used at meetings in NA and Al-Anon here in Ontario, Canada.

I need to be in the now. Just for today, I choose not to use; not only my drug of choice, but all mind altering substances.

[MajestyJo]

Daily Recovery Readings — December 15
Just For Today
December 15
The Joy Of Sharing

“There is a spiritual principle of giving away what we have been given in Narcotics Anonymous in order to keep it. By helping others to stay clean, we enjoy the benefit of the spiritual wealth that we have found.”
Basic Text pg. 47

Time and again in our recovery, others have freely shared with us what was freely shared with them. Perhaps we were the recipients of a Twelfth Step call. Maybe someone picked us up and took us to our first meeting. It could be that someone bought us dinner when we were new. All of us have been given time, attention, and love by our fellow members. We may have asked someone, “What can I do to repay you?” And the answer we received was probably a suggestion that we do the same for a newer member when we were able.

As we maintain our clean time and recovery, we find ourselves wanting to do for others the things that someone did for us, and happy that we can. If we heard the message while in a hospital or institution, we can join our local H&I subcommittee. Perhaps we can volunteer on the NA help line. Or we can give of our time, attention, and love to a newcomer we are trying to help.

We’ve been given much in our recovery. One of the greatest of these gifts is the privilege of sharing with others what’s been shared with us, with no expectation of reward. It’s a joy to find we have something that can be of use to others, and that joy is multiplied when we share it. Today we can do so, freely and gratefully.

Just for today: I have been given much in my recovery, and I am deeply grateful for it. I will take joy in being able to share it with others as freely as it was shared with me.

This is why I come to the site and share.

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
November 20
Finding Fulfillment

“We weren’t oriented toward fulfillment; we focused on the emptiness and worthlessness of it all.”
Basic Text p. 86

There were probably hundreds of times in our active addiction when we wished we could become someone else. We may have wished we could trade places with someone who owned a nice car or had a larger home, a better job, a more attractive mate – anything but what we had. So severe was our despair that we could hardly imagine anyone being in worse shape than ourselves.

In recovery, we may find we are experiencing a different sort of envy. We may continue to compare our insides with others’ outsides and feel as though we still don’t have enough of anything. We may think everyone, from the newest member to the oldest old-timer, sounds better at meetings than we do. We may think that everyone else must be working a better program because they have a better car, a larger home, more money, and so on.

The recovery process experienced through our Twelve Steps will take us from an attitude of envy and low self-esteem to a place of spiritual fulfillment and deep appreciation for what we do have. We find that we would never willingly trade places with another, for what we have discovered within ourselves is priceless.

Just for today: There is much to be grateful for in my life. I will cherish the spiritual fulfillment I have found in recovery.

I remember a woman in early recovery, I would had less than two years clean and sober and she said, "How can you be so happy on so little." Since my marriage ended I had been Mother's Allowance, and after I wasn't able to work because of my addiction, I was on Welfare. My social worker got me on Ontario Disability, which made living a little easier.

I had that envy and low self-esteem. As it says, you have fill the void with spiritual things, and then the ache and pain goes away. Gratitude goes a long way. As my sponsor said to me, "If you got one hand in the hand of a newcomer and the other hand in the Hand of your Higher Power, you don't have any hands left to pick up." It worked for me. That is how I lost three pounds when I quit smoking, instead of gaining. I didn't look to other substances, I went to NA and collected my key tags and worked the program. I not only had to clean myself, but my surroundings and certain friends and my family from my life, until such a time, as I could bring them back in my life, when I could stand firm and learned how to deal with those outside issues.

I went to a self-esteem program, which was suggested by my social worker that got me into the recovery house. I went about 4 times, not sure now, a long time ago, and I kept thinking, "People, get a 12 Step Program." I had been where they were and didn't want to get pulled down by all the negativity.

The same thing happened when I went for anger management. The teacher said, "We value your input and help." I said, "I am not here to do your job." I am not getting what I need here, I will go back to working the 12 Steps.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/christmas-santa-chimney/0018.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today

November 26

Responsibility

“A lot happens in one day, both negative and positive. If we do not take the time to appreciate both, perhaps we will miss something that will help us grow.”

IP No. 8, “Just For Today”


Responsibility, responsibility – the responsibility of life are everywhere. We’re “supposed to” wear seat belts. We’re “supposed to “clean our homes. We’re “supposed to” do certain things for our spouse, our children, the people we sponsor. On top of all of this we’re “supposed to” go to meetings and practice our program as best we can. It’s no wonder that, sometimes, we want to run from all these tasks and escape to some far-off island where we’re not “supposed to” do anything.

At times like these, when we become overwhelmed with our responsibilities, we have forgotten that responsibility need not be burdensome. When we have the desire to run away from our responsibilities we need to slow down, remember why we have chosen them, and pay attention to the gifts they bring. Whether it’s a job we normally find challenging and interesting, or a partner whose personality we are usually excited by, or a child whom we naturally like to play with and care for, there is joy to be found in all the responsibilities of our lives.

Just for today; Each moment is special. I will pay attention, grateful for my responsibilities and the special joys they bring.

For many years, I took on what wasn't mine. As my health issues grew, I had to bow out of a lot of things and accept things as they were. Doing more than what I could physically do, made my a martyr and a victim, and don't want to go there in today.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/mammals-bears-holidays/0040.gif

[MajestyJo]

NA Just for Today
December 28
Depression

“We are no longer fighting fear anger guilt, self-pity, or depression.”
Basic Text pg. 26

As addicts, many of us experience depression from time to time. When we feel depressed, we may be tempted to isolate ourselves. However, if we do this, our depression may turn to despair. We can’t afford to let depression lead us back to using.

Instead, we try to go about the routine of our lives. We make meeting attendance and contact with our sponsor top priorities. Sharing with others about our feelings may let us know we aren’t the only ones who have been depressed in recovery. Working with a newcomer can work wonders for our own state of mind. And, most importantly, prayer and meditation can help us tap the power we need to survive depression.

We practice acceptance and remember that feelings like depression will unquestionably pass in time. Rather than struggle with our feelings, we accept them and ask for the strength to walk through them.

Just for today: I accept that my feelings of depression won’t last forever. I will talk openly about my feelings with my sponsor or another person who understands.

Depression is part of grief and a part of healing when we come into recovery. The loss of our drug(s) of choice which have left an big void in our world and we can no longer reach for it to cope with life.

There is clinical depression that needs medication to bring our life into balance, but normal depression doesn't need a pill to take it away if you apply the 12 Steps and apply the program as a way of life. They tried to put me on an anti-depressant for years, but I found that for me, they were mind altering and prevented them from being me. I have been on so many I lost count. I am feeling guilty about taking the Lyrica that my doctor prescribed, and I like sleeping and not having pain, but don't like the number it does on my head and I seem to be getting more and more headaches and a loss of mental thought. I have trouble getting the words out to say what I mean. I am really considering going back to the pain and dealing with it, instead of not feeling mentally capable. :sad:

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today

January 30

Giving It Away

“We must give freely and gratefully that which has been freely and gratefully given to us.”

Basic Text p. 47

In recovery, we receive many gifts. Perhaps one of the greatest of these gifts is the spiritual awakening that begins when we stop using, growing stronger each day we apply the steps in our lives. The new spark of life within is a direct result of our new relationship with a Higher Power, a relationship initiated and developed by living the Twelve Steps. Slowly, as we pursue our program, the radiance of recovery dispels the darkness of our disease.

One of the ways we express our gratitude for the gifts of recovery is to help others find what we’ve found. We can do this in any number of ways: by sharing in meetings, making Twelfth Step calls, accepting a commitment to sponsorship, or volunteering for H&I or phoneline duty. The spiritual life given to us in recovery asks for expression, for ” we can only keep what we have by giving it away.”

Just for today: The gift of recovery grows when I share it. I will find someone with whom to share it.
The 5th Tradition gave me a purpose for living. It is why I come on this site and share because I can't always go out and connect with others.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/water-frogs/0216.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today

February 2

Goodwill

“Goodwill is best exemplified in service; proper service is doing the right thing for the right reason.”

—Basic Text p. ix

The spiritual core of our disease is self-centeredness. In dealing with others, the only motive our addiction taught us was selfishness — we wanted what we wanted when we wanted it. Obsession with self was rooted in the very ground of our lives. In recovery, how do we root self-obsession out?

We reverse the effects of our disease by applying a few very simple spiritual principles. To counteract the self-centeredness of our addiction, we learn to apply the principle of goodwill. Rather than seeking to serve only ourselves, we begin serving others. Rather than thinking only about what we can get out of a situation, we learn to think first of the welfare of others. When faced with a moral choice, we learn to stop, recall spiritual principles, and act appropriately.

As we begin “doing the right thing for the right reason;” we can detect a change in ourselves. Where once we were ruled by self-will, now we are guided by our goodwill for others. The chronic self-centeredness of addiction is losing its hold on us. We are learning to “practice these principles in all our affairs”; we are living in our recovery, not in our disease.

Just for today: Wherever I am, whatever I do, I will seek to serve others, not just myself. When faced with a dilemma, I will try to do the right thing for the right reason.

I went to an AA meeting at noon today to see if a friend was alive or dead. I hadn't seen him for a long time. He was a part of the group I opened Freedom of Recovery, which was an open group. It ended up he was sick and not there, but it was okay, because I needed the meeting for myself.

As I shared with a lady this morning, I went to AA for my denial and I went to NA for identification. I knew I was an addict, my drug of choice was more.

[nina]

Thanks for your thoughts on Today. I am not a musician but have composed a Today ditty that is meant to go to a wrap beat. Anyway it helps me to recall the message and may help someone else.
Hey! Hey! Just for today
You can be happy the AA (12 step...) way.
Adjust to what is-avoid a tizz
Mind what you think, never a drink.
Read, learn and ponder as you go yonder.
Remember your soul-an ongoing goal,
Do good discretely
Do two tasks meekly
Learn to detach-life isn't a match.
Being agreeable becomes achievable,
Make your own program
Do it today
You can be happy the AA way.
Enjoy some quiet-it's part of the diet
Dare never fear, God's always near.
Let it go, out you go.
Step up to the plate, give help to a mate
Forget the fight, look to the light.

Happily today I am sober and have had time to work with Meditations for the Twelve Steps- A Spiritual Journey and the associated workbook and references in the Life Recovery Bible. I have found these very helpful.
Yours in recovery
Nina

[bluidkiti]

I really like that nina. Thanks for sharing it with us. :1:

[MajestyJo]

Hope you don't mind me sharing this. I think it is awesome.

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today

February 6

I Can’t – We Can

“We had convinced ourselves that we could make it alone and proceeded to live life on that basis. The results were disastrous and, in the end, each of us had to admit that self-sufficiency was a lie”
Basic Text p. 59

“I can’t, but we can.” This simple but profound truth applies initially to our first need as NA members: Together, we can stay clean, but when we isolate ourselves, we’re in bad company. To recover, we need the support of other addicts.

Self-sufficiency impedes more than just our ability to stay clean. With or without drugs, living on self-will inevitably leads to disaster. We depend on other people for everything from goods and services to love and companionship, yet self-will puts us in constant conflict with those very people. To live a fulfilling life, we need harmony with others.

Other addicts and others in our communities are not the only ones we depend on. Power is not a human attribute, yet we need power to live. We find it in a Power greater than ourselves which provides the guidance and strength we lack on our own. When we pretend to be self-sufficient, we isolate ourselves from the one source of power sufficient to effectively guide us through life: our Higher Power.

Self-sufficiency doesn’t work. We need other addicts; we need other people; and, to live fully, we need a Power greater than our own.

Just for today: I will seek the support of other recovering addicts, harmony with others in my community, and the care of my Higher Power. I can’t, but we can.


Some one has to go wee, wee all the way home!

http://dl.glitter-graphics.com/pub/800/800946jlu3ee0rrc.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
February 21
Self-Pity Or Recovery – It’s Our Choice

“Self-pity is one of the most destructive of defects; it will drain us of all positive energy.”
Basic Text, p. 77

In active addiction, many of us used self-pity as a survival mechanism. We didn’t believe there was an alternative to living in our disease&151or perhaps we didn’t want to believe. As long as we could feel sorry for ourselves and blame someone else for our troubles, we didn’t have to accept the consequences of our actions; believing ourselves powerless to change, we didn’t have to accept the need for change. Using this “survival mechanism” kept us from entering recovery and led us closer, day by day, to self-destruction. Self-pity is a tool of our disease; we need to stop using it and learn instead to use the new tools we find in the NA program.

We have come to believe that effective help is available for us; when we seek that help, finding it in the NA program, self-pity is displaced by gratitude. Many tools are at our disposal: the Twelve Steps, the support of our sponsor, the fellowship of other recovering addicts, and the care of our Higher Power. The availability of all these tools is more than enough reason to be grateful. We no longer live in isolation, without hope; we have certain help at hand for anything we may face. The surest way to become grateful is to take advantage of the help available to us in the NA program and to experience the improvement the program will bring in our lives.

Just for today: I will be grateful for the hope NA has given me. I will cultivate my recovery and stop cultivating self-pity.


Loved the title of this. It is my choice. Do I choose to act out in my dis-ease or do I choose recovery.

http://angelwinks.ca/images/iq/qckittenmouse281.jpg

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
February 25
Sick As Our Secrets

“It would be tragic to write [out an inventory only to] shove it in a drawer These defects grow in the dark and die in the light of exposure.”
Basic Text, p. 31

How many times have we heard it said that we are only as sick as our secrets? While many members choose not to use meetings to share the intimate details of their lives, it is important that we each discover what works best for us. What about those behaviors we have carried into our recovery that, if discovered, would cause us shame? How much are we comfortable disclosing, and to whom? If we are uncomfortable sharing some details of our lives in meetings, to whom do we turn?

We have found the answer to these questions in sponsorship. Although a relationship with a sponsor takes time to build, it is important that we come to trust our sponsor enough to be completely honest. Our defects only have power as long as they stay hidden. If we want to be free of those defects, we must uncover them. Secrets are only secrets until we share them with another human being.

Just for today: I will uncover my secrets. I will practice being honest with my sponsor.

This was very enlightening for me. I had stuffed feelings and memories for years and they were very deeply hidden. Recovery was a process and I was one of the very sick ones. Getting those secrets out of the darkness and into the light, brought growth, healing, and new awareness.

http://www.graphicsfactory.com/clip-art/image_files/tn_image/9/1345509-tn_2672-Royalty-Free-Frog-Prince.jpg

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
March 18

The Full Message

“There is a special feeling for addicts when they discover that there are other people who share their difficulties, past and present.”
Basic Text p. 53

The wealth of our recovery is too good to keep to ourselves. Some of us believe that when we talk in meetings, we should “remember the newcomer” and always try to carry a positive message. But sometimes the most positive message we can carry is that we are going through difficult times in our recovery and are staying clean in spite of them!

Yes, it’s gratifying to send out a strong message of hope to our newer members. After all, no one likes a whiner. But distressing things happen, and life on life’s terms can send shock waves even through the recovery of long-time members of Narcotics Anonymous. If we are equipped with the tools of the program, we can walk through such turmoil and stay clean to tell the tale.

Recovery doesn’t happen all at once; it is an ongoing process, sometimes a struggle. When we dilute the fullness of our message by neglecting to share about the tough times we may walk through on our journey, we fail to allow newcomers the chance to see that they, too, can stay clean, no matter what. If we share the full message of our recovery, we may not know who benefits, but we can be sure someone will.

Just for today: I will honestly share both the good times and the difficult times of my recovery. I will remember that my experience in walking through adversity may benefit another member.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/category_animals/mammals-rabbits/0137.gifhttp://www.animated-gifs.eu/category_animals/mammals-rabbits/0142.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
February 23
Messages And Messengers

“Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.”
Tradition Twelve

The Twelfth Tradition reminds us of the importance of putting “principles before personalities.” In recovery meetings, this might be paraphrased, “don’t shoot the messenger!” We often get the message confused with the messenger, and negate what someone shares at a meeting because we have personality conflicts with the person speaking.

If we are having problems with what certain people have to share at meetings, we might want to seek the guidance of our sponsor. Our sponsor can help us concentrate on what’s being said rather than who’s saying it. Our sponsor can also help us address the resentments that may be keeping us from acknowledging the value of some particular person’s recovery experience. It is surprising how much more we can get out of meetings when we allow ourselves to do as our Twelfth Tradition suggests, focusing on recovery principles rather than personalities.

Just for today: I will practice the principle of anonymity in today’s NA meeting. I will focus on the message of recovery, not the personality of the messenger.

Can so relate to this. I gentleman in the rooms kept saying, "Take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth." I found myself really getting annoyed, especially when I saw him coming out of the washroom and putting a flask back into his coat pocket. I thought, "How dare he? He isn't even sober.

Thankfully he kept coming and got clean and sober and carries a good message. He also carried a good message for me, I had to listen and what is important is the message, not the messenger.

http://www.animatedimages.org/data/media/211/animated-cow-image-0012.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
April 18
“I Understand”

“We humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.”
Step Seven

Once we are entirely ready to have our character defects removed, many of us are entirely ready! Ironically, that’s when the trouble really starts. The more we struggle to rid ourselves of a particular defect, the stronger that shortcoming seems to become. It is truly humbling to realize that not only are we powerless over our addiction, but even over our own defects of character.

Finally, it clicks. The Seventh Step doesn’t suggest that we rid ourselves of our shortcomings, but that we ask our Higher Power to rid us of them. The focus of our daily prayers begins to shift. Admitting our inability to perfect ourselves, we plead with our Higher Power to do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. And we wait.

For many days, our program may stay on Step Seven. We may experience no sudden, total relief from defects – but we often do experience a subtle shift in our perceptions of ourselves and others. Through the eyes of the Seventh Step, we begin to see those around us in a less critical way. We know that, just like us, many of them are struggling with shortcomings they would dearly love to be rid of. We know that, just like us, they are powerless over their own defects. We wonder if they, too, humbly pray to have their defects removed.

We begin evaluating others as we have learned to evaluate ourselves, with an empathy born of humility. As we watch others, and as we keep watch on ourselves, we can finally say, “I understand.”

Just for today: God, help me see through the eyes of Step Seven. Help me understand.

As they say, I can be teachable and willing to learn, if I am not willing to accept and try to understand what my God's Will for me is in today.

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
May 6
Are We Having Fun Yet?

“In time, we can relax and enjoy the atmosphere of recovery.”
Basic Text, pp. 53-54

Imagine what would happen if a newcomer walked into one of our meetings and was met by a group of grim-faced people gripping the arms of their chairs with white knuckles. That newcomer would probably bolt, perhaps muttering, “I thought I could get off drugs and be happy.”

Thankfully, our newcomers are usually met by a group of friendly, smiling folks who are obviously fairly content with the lives they’ve found in Narcotics Anonymous. What an enormous amount of hope this provides! A newcomer, whose life has been deadly serious, is strongly attracted by an atmosphere of laughter and relaxation. Coming from a place where everything is taken seriously, where disaster always waits around the next corner, it’s a welcome relief to enter a room and find people who generally don’t take themselves too seriously, who are ready for something wonderful.

We learn to lighten up in recovery. We laugh at the absurdity of our addiction. Our meetings—those rooms filled with the lively, happy sounds of percolating coffee, clattering chairs, and laughing addicts—are the gathering places where we first welcome our newcomers and let them know that, yes, we’re having fun now.

Just for today: I can laugh at myself. I can take a joke. I will lighten up and have some fun today.

If you aren't enjoying recovery, what are you doing wrong?

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
May 13
Onward On The Journey

“The progression of recovery is a continuous uphill journey”
Basic Text, p. 79

The longer we stay clean, the steeper and narrower our path seems to become. But God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. No matter how difficult the road becomes, no matter how narrow, how winding the turns, there is hope. That hope lies in our spiritual progression.

If we keep showing up at meetings and staying clean, life gets… well, different. The continual search for answers to life’s ups and downs can lead us to question all aspects of our lives. Life isn’t always pleasant. This is when we must turn to our Higher Power with even more faith. Sometimes all we can do is hold on tight, believing that things will get better.

In time, our faith will produce understanding. We will begin to see the “bigger picture” of our lives. As our relationship with our Higher Power unfolds and deepens, acceptance becomes almost second nature. No matter what happens as we walk through recovery, we rely on our faith in a loving Higher Power and continue onward.

Just for today: I accept that I don’t have all the answers to life’s questions. Nonetheless, I will have faith in the God of my understanding and continue on the journey of recovery.

Recovery is a journey, not a destination.

https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS8srMuLTi2A8XiBIdSGSyNkICHt88tw 41IHthkBBArFo1BQ-etuA

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
May 18
Friends And Amends—Keeping It Simple

“We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.”
Step Nine

In every relationship, we don’t always handle things the way we would have hoped. But friendships don’t have to end when we make mistakes; instead, we can make amends. If we are sincerely willing to accept the responsibilities involved in friendship and make the amends we owe, those friendships can become stronger and richer than ever.

Making amends is simple. We approach the person we have harmed and say, “I was wrong.” Sometimes we avoid getting to the point, evading an admission of our own part in the affair. But that frustrates the intent of the Ninth Step. To make effective amends, we have to keep it simple: we admit our part, and leave it at that.

There will be times when our friends won’t accept our amends. Perhaps they need time to process what has happened. If that is the case, we must give them that time. After all, we were the ones in the wrong, not them. We have done our part; the rest is out of our hands.

Just for today: I want to be a responsible friend. I will strive to keep it simple when making amends.

Found that when I became willing to make the amend, things fell in place. Sometimes things are overwhelming and we think the worst, and yet it seldom turns out that way. I have made amends and people didn't even know what I was talking about.

http://www.angelwinks.webby.com/images/giggle41.jpg

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
May 22
Symptoms Of A Spiritual Awakening

“The steps lead to an awakening of a spiritual nature. This awakening is evidenced by changes in our lives.”
Basic Text, p. 48

We know how to recognize the disease of addiction. Its symptoms are indisputable. Besides an uncontrollable appetite for drugs, those suffering exhibit self-centered, self-seeking behavior. When our addiction was at its peak of activity, we were obviously in a great deal of pain. We relentlessly judged ourselves and others, and spent most of our time worrying or trying to control outcomes.

Just as the disease of addiction is evidenced by definite symptoms, so is a spiritual awakening made manifest by certain obvious signs in a recovering addict. We may observe a tendency to think and act spontaneously, a loss of interest in judging or interpreting the actions of anyone else, an unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment, and frequent attacks of smiling.

If we see someone exhibiting symptoms of a spiritual awakening, we should be aware that such awakenings are contagious. Our best course of action is to get close to these people. As we begin having frequent, overwhelming episodes of gratitude, an increased receptiveness to the love extended by our fellow members, and an uncontrollable urge to return this love, we’ll realize that we, too, have had a spiritual awakening.

Just for today: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening. I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.

https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.M137b03def845a2e8128baa29a2287215H0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300

[MajestyJo]

Just for Today
June 03, 2016

Direct and indirect amends

Page 161

"We make our amends to the best of our ability."

Basic Text, p. 40

The Ninth Step tells us to make direct amends wherever possible. Our experience tells us to follow up those direct amends with long-lasting changes in our attitudes and our behavior - that is, with indirect amends.

For example, say we've broken someone's window because we were angry. Looking soulfully into the eyes of the person whose window we've broken and apologizing would not be sufficient. We directly amend the wrong we've done by admitting it and replacing the window - we mend what we have damaged.

Then, we follow up our direct amends with indirect amends. If we've acted out on our anger, breaking someone's window, we examine the patterns of our behavior and our attitudes. After we repair the broken window, we seek to repair our broken attitudes as well - we try to "mend our ways." We modify our behavior, and make a daily effort not to act out on our anger.

We make direct amends by repairing the damage we do. We make indirect amends by repairing the attitudes that cause us to do damage in the first place, helping insure we won't cause further damage in the future.

Just for Today: I will make direct amends, wherever possible. I will also make indirect amends, "mending my ways," changing my attitudes, and altering my behavior.


Amends isn't saying "I am sorry," it is about changing me and my attitude and not making the same mistakes over and over again.

[MajestyJo]

The only requirement

Page 166

"This program offers hope. All you have to bring with you is the desire to stop using and the willingness to try this new way of life."

IP No. 16, For the Newcomer

From time to time we wonder if we're "doing it right" in Narcotics Anonymous. Are we attending enough meetings? Are we using our sponsor, or working the steps, or speaking, or reading, or living the "right" way? We value the fellowship of recovering addicts - we don't know what we'd do without it. What if the way we're practicing our program is "wrong"? Does that make us "bad" NA members?

We can settle our insecurities by reviewing our Third tradition, which assures us that "the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using." There aren't any rules that say we've got to attend this many meetings or these particular meetings, or work the "steps" this way at this pace, or live our lives to suit these people in order to remain NA members in good standing.

It's true that, if we want the kind of recovery we see in members we respet, we'll want ot practice the kind of program that's made their recovery possible. But NA is a fellowship of freedom; we work the program the best way for us, not for someone else. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using.

Just for Today: I will look at the program I'm working in light of my own recovery. I will practice that program to the best of my ability.

Often I have to pray for the willingness to be willing.

[MajestyJo]

June 16

Accepting life

Page 174

"Some things we must accept, others we can change. The wisdom to know the difference comes with growth in our spiritual program."

Basic Text, p. 95

It's relatively easy to accept the things we like - it's the things we don't like that are hard to accept. But remaking the world and everyone in it to suit our tastes would solve nothing. After all, the idea that the world was to blame for all our problems was the attitude that kept us using - and that attitude nearly killed us.

In the course of working the steps, we begin to ask ourselves hard questions about the roles we ourselves have played in creating the unacceptable lives we've lived. In most cases, we've found that what needed changing was our own attitude and our own actions, not the people, places, and things around us.

In recovery, we pray for wisdom to know the difference between what can and can't be changed. Then, once we see the truth of our situation, we pray for the willingness to change ourselves.

Just for Today: Higher Power, grant me the wisdom to know the difference between what can be changed and what I must accept. Please help me gratefully accept the life I've been given.

Acceptance has always been the key. If I don't have acceptance, I don't have honesty, and open mind, or willingness, the principles of the first step.

[MajestyJo]

June 18
Indirect amends

Page 176

"Indirect amends may be necessary where direct ones would be unsafe or endanger other people."

Basic Text, p. 41

When we used, we allowed nothing to stand in the way of that next high. As a result, many of us didn't always know precisely whom we had injured, either financially or emotionally. When it came time to make amends through our Ninth Step, we found that there were so many people we had victimized that we might never remember them all.

With the help of our sponsor and other recovering members of NA, we found a solution to this obstacle. We vowed to complete these nameless amends by making restitution to our communities. We focused our service efforts on helping the still-suffering addict. In this manner, we found a way to give back to society.

Today, with the love and guidance of members in NA, we are giving back to the world around us rather than taking. We are making our communities better places to live by carrying the message of recovery to those we encounter in our daily lives.

Just for Today: I will make indirect amends by reaching out to an addict who may need help. I will strive in some small way to make my community a better place in which to live.


Had a lot of these to make as people moved away or I did and they were no longer in my life. The best amend I can make is going to a meeting and sharing with other addicts or coming to this site and sharing with you, my own personal experience, strength, and hope.

http://cdn.mdjunction.com/components/com_joomlaboard/uploaded/images/have_a_good_day_sun.gif

[MajestyJo]

Acepting life as it is

Page 180

"In our recovery, we find it essential to accept reality. Once we can do this, we do not find it necessary to use drugs in an attempt to change our perceptions."

Basic Text, p. 90

Drugs used to buffer us from the full force of life. When we stop using drugs and enter recovery, we find ourselves confronted directly with life. We may experience disappointment, frustration, or anger. Events may not happen the way we want them to. The self-centeredness we cultivated in our addiction has distorted our perceptions of life; it is difficult to let go of our expectations and accept life as it is.

We learn to accept our lives by working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous. We discover how to change our attitudes and let go of character defects. We no longer need to distort the truth or to run from situations. The more we practice the spiritual principles contained in the steps the easier it becomes to accept life exactly as it comes to us.

Just for Today: I will practice self-acceptance by practicing the Twelve Steps.


http://www.netanimations.net/animated-pink-blue-elephant-waving.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just for Today
June 30

Keeping recovery fresh

Page 187

"Complacency is the enemy of members with substantial clean time. If we remain complacent for long, the recovery process ceases."

Basic Text, p. 84

After the first couple of years in recovery, most of us start to feel like there are no more big deals. If we've been diligent in working the steps, the past is largely resolved and we have a solid foundation on which to build our future. We've learned to take life pretty much as it comes. Familiarity with the steps allows us to resolve problems almost as quickly as they arise.

Once we discover this level of comfort, we may tend to treat it as a "rest stop" on the recovery path. Doing so, however, discounts the nature of our disease. Addiction is patient, subtle, progressive, and incurable. It's also fatal - we can die from this disease, unless we continue to treat it. And the treatment for addiction is a vital, ongoing program of recovery.

The Twelve Steps are a process, a path we take to stay a step ahead of our disease. Meetings, sponsorship, service, and the steps always remain essential to ongoing recovery. Though we may practice our program somewhat differently with five years clean than with five months, this doesn't mean the program has changed or become less important, only that our practical understanding has changed and grown. To keep our recovery fresh and vital, we need to stay alert for opportunities to practice our program.

Just for Today: As I keep growing in my recovery, I will search for new ways to practice my program.


Met a woman on the bus today that I haven't seen for several years. I knew her from N/A and Al-Anon. She asked for my phone number so I gave it to her. We were close at one time, she has been in my home. I felt it was an intervention, God inspired for the good of us both.

http://www.imgion.com/images/01/Animated-teddy-saying-sorry.gif

[MajestyJo]

July 03, 2016

Quiet time

Page 193

"Many of us have found that setting aside quiet time for ourselves is helpful in making conscious contact with our Higher Power."

Basic Text, p. 95

Most of us pay lip-service to the value of conscious contact with a Higher Power. Yet how many of us consistently take time to improve that conscious contact? If we've not already established a regular regimen of prayer and meditation, today is the day to start one.

A "quiet time" need not be long. Many of us find that twenty to thirty minutes is enough time to quiet ourselves, focus our attention with a spiritual reading, share our thoughts and concerns in prayer, and take a few moments to listen for an answer in meditation. Our "quiet time" need not be lengthy to be effective, provided it is consistent. Twenty minutes taken once a month to pray will probably do little but frustrate us with the poor quality of our conscious contact. Twenty minutes taken regularly each day, however, renews and reinforces an already lively contact with our Higher Power.

In the hustle and bustle of the recovering addict's day, many of us end up going from morning to night without taking time out to improve our conscious contact with the God we've come to understand. However, if we set aside a particular time of the day, every day, as "quiet time," we can be sure that our conscious contact will improve.

Just for Today: I will set aside a few moments, once I finish reading today's entry, to pray and meditate. This will be the beginning of a new pattern for my recovery.

It is so easy to get caught up in busy, especially when we are late. Many times, I get to my elevator door and have to stop and say the Serenity Prayer. If I get on that elevator without saying it, things don't always turn out right. My thinking can be off getting impatient waiting for the elevator to arrive, so that in itself, is a good reason why I should turn my day over to the God of my understanding.

http://i415.photobucket.com/albums/pp236/Keefers_/Keefers_Animated%20Insects/Keefers_AnimatedAnimals2017.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just for Today
June 6

"I'm sorry"

Page 196

"The main thing [the Eighth Step] does for us is to help build awareness that, little by little, we are gaining new attitudes about ourselves and how we deal with other people."

Basic Text, p. 39

To say "I'm sorry" probably isn't such a foreign idea to most of us. In our active addiction, it may have been a very familiar phrase. We were always telling people how sorry we were, and were probably deeply surprised when someone, tired of our meaningless apologies, responded with, "You sure are. In fact, you're the sorriest excuse for..." That may have been our first clue that an "I'm sorry" didn't really make any difference to those we harmed, especially when we both knew that we'd just do the same thing again.

Many of us thought that making amends would be another "I'm sorry." However, the action we take in those steps is entirely different. Making amends means to make changes, and above all, to make the situation right. If we stole money, we don't just say "I'm sorry. I'll never do it again now that I'm clean." We pay the money back. If we neglected or abused our families, we don't just apologize. We begin to treat them with respect.

Amending our behavior and the way we treat ourselves and others is the whole purpose of working the steps. We're no longer just "sorry"; we're responsible.

Just for Today: I accept responsibility for myself and my recovery. Today, I will amend some particular thing I'm sorry for.

I'm sorry just doesn't cut it. We need to work on our issues so that we don't continue acting out in our disease. Me need to make an amend, which means changing our thoughts and our actions. It doesn't help to say, "I'm sorry!" and continue to do the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. It is the insanity of our disease."

http://cdn.viralscape.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Bunny-GIF.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just For Today
September 9
Feet Of Clay

“One of the biggest stumbling blocks to recovery seems to be placing unrealistic expectations on… others.”
Basic Text p.78

Many of us come into Narcotics Anonymous feeling pretty poorly about ourselves. By comparison, the recovering addicts we meet at meetings may seem almost superhumanly serene. These wise, loving people have many months, even years of living in accordance with spiritual principles, giving of themselves to others without expecting anything back. We trust them, allowing them to love us until we can love ourselves. We expect them to make everything alright again.

Then the glow of early recovery begins to fade, and we start to see the human side of our NA friends and sponsor. Perhaps a fellow member of our home group stands us up for a coffee date, or we see two old-timers bickering at a committee meeting, or we realize our sponsor has a defect of character or two. We’re crushed, disillusioned-these recovering addicts aren’t perfect after all! How can we possibly trust them anymore?

Somewhere between “the heroes of recovery” and “the lousy NA bums” lies the truth: Our fellow addicts are neither completely bad nor completely good. After all, if they were perfect, they wouldn’t need this program. Our friends and sponsor are ordinary recovering addicts, just like we are. We can relate to their ordinary recovery experience and use it in our own program.

Just for today: My friends and my sponsor are human, just like me-and I trust their experience all the more for that.

It was a hard lesson to learn, don't put someone or allow someone else put you on a pedastal, it is a hard way down when you fall.

I had a sponsor who listened with her ears and spoke with her mouth a lot of my business, that wasn't hers to tell. I generally didn't care, because I would have said what ever I had to say to someone's face. What you see is what you get. Ironically, I sponsored her when she was ill and dying. I got the feeling that she had aliannated just about everyone else. It was sad.

[MajestyJo]

Just for Today
July 12

Patience

Page 202

"We were trapped by our need for the instant gratification that drugs gave us."

Basic Text, p. 25

"I want what I want, and I want it now!" That's about as patient as most of us ever got in our active addiction. The obsession and compulsion of our disease gave us a "one-track" way of thinking; when we wanted something, that's all we thought about. And the drugs we took taught us that instant gratification was never more than a dose away. It's no wonder that most of us came to Narcotics Anonymous with next to no patience.

The problem is, we can't always get what we want whenever we want it. Some of our wishes are pure fantasy; if we think about it, we'll realize we have no reason to believe those wishes will be fulfilled in our lifetimes. We probably can't even fulfill all our realistic desires; we certainly can't fulfill them all at once. In order to acquire or achieve some things, we will have to sacrifice others.

In our addiction we sought instant gratification, squandering our resources. In recovery we must learn to prioritize, sometimes denying the gratification of some desires in order to fulfill more important long-term goals. To do so requires patience. To find that patience, we practice our program of recovery, seeking the kind of full-bodied spiritual awakening that will allow us to live and enjoy life on life's terms.

Just for Today: Higher Power, help me discover what's most important in my life. Help me learn patience, so that I can devote my resources to the important things.

This is so important for me at the moment. My fibromyalgia had been making itself glaringly apparent lately and I have to have patience with myself. It begins with me, I have to have it within myself in order to be patient with others.

http://image.blingee.com/images19/content/output/000/000/000/7c3/780992660_33418.gif

[MajestyJo]

Just for Today

Surrendering self-will

Page 213

"We want and demand that things always go our way. We should know from our past experience that our way of doing things did not work."

Basic Text, p. 93

All of us have ideas, plans, goals for our lives. There's nothing in the NA program that says we shouldn't think for ourselves, take initiative, and put responsible plans into action. It's when our lives are driven by self-will that we run into problems.

When we are living willfully, we go beyond thinking for ourselves-we think only of ourselves. We forget that we are but a part of the world and that whatever personal strength we have is drawn from a Higher Power. We might even go so far as to imagine that other people exist solely to do our bidding. Quickly, we find ourselves at odds with everyone and everything around us.

At this point, we have two choices. We can continue in our slavery to self-will, making unreasonable demands and becoming frustrated because the planet doesn't spin our way. Or we can surrender, relax, seek knowledge of God's will and the power to carry that out, and find our way back to a condition of peace with the world. Thinking, taking initiative, making responsible plans-there's nothing wrong with these things, so long as they serve God's will, not merely our own.

Just for Today: I will plan to do God's will, not mine. If I find myself at odds with everything around me, I will surrender self-will.


I must always remember to get out of my own way. My best thinking got me to the doors of recovery. My thinking is healthier in today, thanks to the program which I apply one day at a time. When I find myself slipping back into those old thoughts and patterns, I can pick up the recovery tools and stop my slide into a lapse of judgment, perception, and self-will run riot.

I must remember that, when I surrender, I am empowered to do what I need to do for my recovery in today.

[MajestyJo]

July 26, 2016

Unconditional surrender

Page 216

"Help for addicts begins only when we are able to admit complete defeat. This can be frightening, but it is the foundation on which we have built our lives."

Basic Text, p. 22

Most of us have tried everything we can think of, exerted every ounce of force possible, to fill the spiritual hole inside us. Nothing-not drugs, not control and management, not sex, money, property, power, or prestige-has filled it. We are powerless; our lives are unmanageable, at least by ourselves alone. Our denial will not change that fact.

So we surrender; we ask a Higher Power to care for our will and our lives. Sometimes in surrendering, we don't know that a Power greater than ourselves exists which can restore us to wholeness. Sometimes we're not sure that the God of our understanding will care for our unmanageable lives. Our lack of certainty, though, does not affect the essential truth: We are powerless. Our lives are unmanageable. We must surrender. Only by doing so can we open ourselves wide-wide enough for our old ideas and past wreckage to be cleared, wide enough for a Higher Power to enter.

Just for Today: I will surrender unconditionally. I can make it as easy or as hard as I choose. Either way, I will do it.


I always looked at surrender as giving up and failure. It is far from it. It is about giving up my way and being honest, open minded, and willing to work the program and listen and learn from others.

When I surrender to the program and to my Higher Power, I am empowered as to what I need to do each day to stay clean and sober. Sober belongs in NA, just as much as it does in that OTHER fellowship. You don't get soundness of mind, when you take mind altering substances. Alcohol is a drug.

[MajestyJo]

August 01, 2016

Freedom from guilt

Page 223

"Our addiction enslaved us. We were prisoners of our own mind and were condemned by our own guilt."

Basic Text, p. 7

Guilt is one of the most commonly encountered stumbling blocks in recovery. One of the more notorious forms of guilt is the self-loathing that results when we try to forgive ourselves but don't feel forgiven.

How can we forgive ourselves so we feel it? First, we remember that guilt and failure are not links in an unbreakable chain. Honestly sharing with a sponsor and with other addicts shows this to be true. Often the result of such sharing is a more sensible awareness of the part we ourselves have played in our affairs. Sometimes we realize that our expectations have been too high. We increase our willingness to participate in the solutions rather than dwelling on the problems.

Somewhere along the way, we discover who we really are. We usually find that we are neither the totally perfect nor the totally imperfect beings we have imagined ourselves to be. We need not live up to or down to our illusions; we need only live in reality.

Just for Today: I am grateful for my assets and accept my liabilities. Through willingness and humility, I am freed to progress in my recovery and achieve freedom from guilt.

http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g223/Keyivory/Good%20Thoughts/animated-HaveagreatdayGREATDAY.gif

[MajestyJo]

August 03, 2016

Trusting people

Page 225

"Most of us would have had nowhere else to go if we could not have trusted NA groups and members."

Basic Text, p. 84

Trusting people is a risk. Human beings are notoriously forgetful, unreliable, and imperfect. Most of us come from backgrounds where betrayal and insensitivity among friends were common occurrences. Even our most reliable friends weren't very reliable. By the time we arrive at the doors of NA, most of us have hundreds of experiences bearing out our conviction that people are untrustworthy. Yet our recovery demands that we trust people. We are faced with this dilemma: People are not always trustworthy, yet we must trust them. How do we do that, given the evidence of our pasts?

First, we remind ourselves that the rules of active addiction don't apply in recovery. Most of our fellow members are doing their level best to live by the spiritual principles we learn in the program. Second, we remind ourselves that we aren't 100% reliable, either. We will surely disappoint someone in our lives, no matter how hard we try not to. Third, and most importantly, we realize that we need to trust our fellow members of NA. Our lives are at stake, and the only way we can stay clean is to trust these well-intentioned folks who, admittedly, aren't perfect.

Just for Today: I will trust my fellow members. Though certainly not perfect, they are my best hope.

My sponsor said you can learn two things in recovery, "How to work your program and how not to work your program. My spiritual advisor said just because they are in the rooms doesn't mean you have to trust them if they are not walking their talk. Remember they are as sick as you or they wouldn't be here. I know I was one of the really sick ones. A friend of mind use to say, "I'm a real alcoholic." He admitted to being an addict too. It sounds to me that it has as much truth as being a little bit pregnant." Either you are or you are not, and if you want to get better, trust the program. It works if you work for it. Until I went back to school and my health deteriated, I was doing 7-10 meetings a day for 10 years. Then when things got bad, *** was here for me, whether the members were not. Coming and posting here is my meeting when I can't get out. If there are no new posts, I go to look at the old ones, especially those I missed before and ones that speak to me in today.

[MajestyJo]

August 08, 2016

Responsible recovery

Page 230

"...we accept responsibility for our problems and see that we're equally responsible for our solutions."

Basic Text, p. 97

Some of us, well accustomed to leaving our personal responsibilities to others, may attempt the same behavior in recovery. We quickly find out it doesn't work.

For instance, we are considering making a change in our lives, so we call our sponsor and ask what we should do. Under the guise of seeking direction, we are actually asking our sponsor to assume responsibility for making decisions about our life. Or maybe we've been short with someone at a meeting, so we ask that person's best friend to make our apologies for us. Perhaps we've imposed on a friend several times in the last month to cover our service commitment. Could it be that we've asked a friend to analyze our behavior and identify our shortcomings, rather than taking our own personal inventory?

Recovery is something that has to be worked for. It isn't going to be handed to us on a silver platter, nor can we expect our friends or our sponsor to be responsible for the work we must do ourselves. We recover by making our own decisions, doing our own service, and working our own steps. By doing it for ourselves, we receive the rewards.

Just for Today: I will accept responsibility for my life and my recovery.

Recovery is but a program of suggestion. I needed to find my own program and what would work for me. I found myself reflected in the Fellowship of Recovery.

http://i10.glitter-graphics.org/pub/623/623600c5fp6g5jnv.gif

[MajestyJo]

"As we approach this step, most of us are afraid that there is a monster inside of us that, if released, will destroy us."

Basic Text, p. 27

Most of us are terrified to look at ourselves, to probe our insides. We're afraid that if we examine our actions and motives, we'll find a bottomless black pit of selfishness and hatred. But as we take the Fourth Step, we'll find that those fears were unwarranted. We're human, just like everyone else-no more, no less.

We all have personality traits that we're not especially proud of. On a bad day, we may think that our faults are worse than anyone else's. We'll have moments of self-doubt. We'll question our motives. We may even question our very existence. But if we coould read the minds of our fellow members, we'd find the same struggles. We're no better or worse than anyone else.

We can only change what we acknowledge and understand. Rather than continuing in fear what's buried inside us, we can bring it out into the open. We'll no longer be frightened, and our recovery will flourish in the full light of self-awareness.

Just for today: I fear what I don't know. I will expose my fears and allow them to vanish.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY:

When I brought the stuff from within out into the open, it allowed for more light to shine in my life. The more I got rid of the old, I made room for the new spiritual gifts and blessings of the program.

Posted this on another site in 2004

How can we know what to change if we don't know what is there. We have to recognize things for what they are and feel them, before we can truly let go of them.

http://www.desicomments.com/dc/17/40333/403331.jpg

[MajestyJo]

August 30, 2016

Doing good, feeling good

Page 252

"We examine our actions, reactions, and motives. We often find that we've been doing better than we've been feeling."

Basic Text, p.43

The way we treat others often reveals our own state of being. When we are at peace, we're most likely to treat others with respect and compassion. However, when we're feeling off center; we're likely to respond to others with intolerance and impatience. When we take regular inventory, we'll probably notice a pattern: We treat others badly when we feel bad about ourselves.

What might not be revealed in an inventory, however, is the other side of the coin: When we treat others well, we feel good about ourselves. When we add this positive truth to the negative facts we find about ourselves in our inventory, we begin to behave differently.

When we feel badly, we can pause to pray for guidance and strength. Then, we make a decision to treat those around us with kindness, gentleness, and the same concern we'd like to be shown. A decision to be kind may nurture and sustain the happiness and peace of mind we all wish for. And the joy we inspire may lift the spirits of those around us, in turn fostering our own spiritual well-being.

Just for Today: I will remember that if I change my actions, my thoughts will follow.

When I was with my friend in the grocery store today, the machine to pay by interact wasn't functioning properly. I told the cashier that I would take the juice and pay cash and leave our dinners from their buffet behind. The gentleman behind us told the cashier that he would pay, and I thought at first he was going to buy the food rather than let it go to waste. Instead he gave them to us, and it was an awesome thing to do. I am not sure he understood the circumstances, but it didn't matter, he had a very generous heart. As we walked out of the store past their cafe, he was sitting there eating his meal and I got the opportunity to thank him again.

I said to my friend, "God is very good to us." We need to thank Him as well as the gentleman he put in our path.

The whole thing gave me warm fuzzies. Certainly a change it attitude from what I had prior to recovery.

http://angelwinks.ca/images/kayomi/kayomi34.jpg

[MajestyJo]

Higher Powered

Page 256

"Daily practice of our Twelve Step program enables us to change from what we were to people guided by a Higher Power."

Basic Text, p.8

Who have we been, and who have we become? There are a couple of ways to answer this question. One is very simple: We came to Narcotics Anonymous as addicts, our addiction killing us. In NA, we've been freed from our obsession with drugs and our compulsion to use. And our lives have changed.

But that's only the tip of the iceberg. Who have we really been? In the past, we were people without power or direction. We felt like we had no purpose, no reason for living. Our lives didn't make any more sense to us than they did to our families, our friends, or our neighbors.

Who are we really becoming? Today, we are not merely clean addicts, but people with a sense of direction, a purpose, and a Power greater than ourselves. Through daily practice of the Twelve Steps, we've begun to understand how our addiction warped our feelings, motivations, and behavior. Gradually, the destructive force of our disease has been replaced by the life-giving force of our Higher Power.

Recovery means more than cleaning up-it means powering up. We have done more than shed some bad habits; we are becoming new people, guided by a Higher Power.

Just for Today: The guidance I need to become a new person is ready at hand. Today, I will draw further away from my old lack of direction and closer to my Higher Power.

Each time I go to a meeting, I get Good Orderly Direction from a group of drunks and drug addicts. Alcohol is a drug. I need to get rid of the old to make room for the new.

[MajestyJo]

Higher Powered

Page 256

"Daily practice of our Twelve Step program enables us to change from what we were to people guided by a Higher Power."

Basic Text, p.8

Who have we been, and who have we become? There are a couple of ways to answer this question. One is very simple: We came to Narcotics Anonymous as addicts, our addiction killing us. In NA, we've been freed from our obsession with drugs and our compulsion to use. And our lives have changed.

But that's only the tip of the iceberg. Who have we really been? In the past, we were people without power or direction. We felt like we had no purpose, no reason for living. Our lives didn't make any more sense to us than they did to our families, our friends, or our neighbors.

Who are we really becoming? Today, we are not merely clean addicts, but people with a sense of direction, a purpose, and a Power greater than ourselves. Through daily practice of the Twelve Steps, we've begun to understand how our addiction warped our feelings, motivations, and behavior. Gradually, the destructive force of our disease has been replaced by the life-giving force of our Higher Power.

Recovery means more than cleaning up-it means powering up. We have done more than shed some bad habits; we are becoming new people, guided by a Higher Power.

Just for Today: The guidance I need to become a new person is ready at hand. Today, I will draw further away from my old lack of direction and closer to my Higher Power.

Each time I go to a meeting, I get Good Orderly Direction from a group of drunks and drug addicts. Alcohol is a drug. I need to get rid of the old to make room for the new.

[MajestyJo]

October 29, 2016

Living in the now

Page 315

"Living just for today relieves the burden of the past and the fear of the future."

Basic Text, pp. 94

Thoughts of how bad it was-or could be-can consume our hopes for recovery. Fantasies of how wonderful it was-or could be-can divert us from taking action in the real world. That's why, in Narcotics Anonymous, we talk about living and recovering "just for today."

In NA, we know that we can change. We've come to believe that our Higher Power can restore the soundness of our minds and hearts. The wreckage of our past can be dealt with through the steps. By maintaining our recovery, just for today, we can avoid creating problems in the future.

Life in recovery is no fantasy. Daydreams of how great using was or how we can use successfully in the future, delusions of how great things could be, overblown expectations that set us up for disappointment and relapse-all are stripped of their power by the program. We seek God's will, not our own. We seek to serve others, not ourselves. Our self-centeredness and the importance of how great things could or should be for us disappears. In the light of recovery, we perceive the difference between fantasy and reality.

Just for Today: I am grateful for the principles of recovery and the new reality they've given me.

Today is a not so good day, it is so important to stay in the moment, in the now. I haven't had a migraine that has taken me back to bed since I quit smoking 18 years ago. Today just might be an exception. I find myself fighting it, yet then I ask myself why, and I get the answer, "Because you need to." The weather has a big part of it, so again the key is acceptance.

[MajestyJo]

Acceptance And Change

"Freedom to change seems to come after acceptance of ourselves."

Basic Text pg. 56

Fear and denial are the opposites of acceptance. None of us are perfect, even in our own eyes; all of us have certain traits that, given the chance, we would like to change. We sometimes become overwhelmed when contemplating how far short we fall of our ideals, so overwhelmed that we fear there's no chance of becoming the people we'd like to be. That's when our defense mechanism of denial kicks in, taking us to the opposite extreme: nothing about ourselves needs changing, we tell ourselves, so why worry? Neither extreme gives us the freedom to change.

Whether we are long-time NA members or new to recovery, the freedom to change is acquired by working the Twelve Steps. When we admit our powerlessness and the unmanageability of our lives, we counteract the lie that says we don't have to change. In coming to believe that a Power greater than we are can help us, we lose our fear that we are damaged beyond repair; we come to believe we can change. We turn ourselves over to the care of the God of our understanding and tap the strength we need to make a thorough, honest examination of ourselves. We admit to God, to ourselves, and to another human being what we've found. We accept the good and the bad in ourselves; with this acceptance, we become free to change.

Just for today: I want to change. By working the steps, I will counter fear and denial and find the acceptance needed to change.

pg. 371

I have to be willing to change. I often have to pray for the willingness to be willing to change.

Like the last line "...find the acceptance needed to change." Never thought that I too easily give in and accept things that are no longer working for me and I need to change my perception and my outlook.

Never thought of changing my acceptance, indeed, food for thought! At least not to my knowledge, although I might have in another context. Hmmmm!!!

[MajestyJo]

December 11, 2016

Misery is optional

Page 361

"No one is forcing us to give up our misery."

Basic Text, p. 29

It's funny to remember how reluctant we once were to surrender to recovery. We seemed to think we had wonderful, fulfilling lives as using addicts and that giving up our drugs would be worse than serving a life sentence at hard labor. In reality, the opposite was true: Our lives were miserable, but we were afraid to trade that familiar misery for the uncertainties of recovery.

It's possible to be miserable in recovery, too, though it's not necessary. No one will force us to work the steps, go to meetings, or work with a sponsor. There is no NA militia that will force us to do the things that will free us from pain. But we do have a choice. We've already chosen to give up the misery of active addiction for the sanity of recovery. Now, if we're ready to exchange today's misery for even greater peace, we have a means to do just that-if we really want to.

Just for Today: I don't have to be miserable unless I really want to be. Today, I will trade in my misery for the benefits of recovery.

I am only as miserable as I make up my mind to be. I have freedom of choice as long as I don't pick up that first drug, what ever form it takes. A drug is a drug.

Substitution doesn't work. All I do is end up with two or more addictions.

https://tse3.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.Md3f16c4aab85a7ad6897e7eeb2a10c36H0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300

[MajestyJo]

December 16
Where There's Smoke...

"Complacency is the enemy of members with substantial clean time. If we remain complacent for long, the recovery process ceases."

Basic Text pg. 80

Recognizing complacency in our recovery is like seeing smoke in a room. The "smoke" thickens when our meeting attendance drops, contact with newcomers decreases, or relations with our sponsor aren't maintained. With continued complacency; we won't be able to see through the smoke to find our way out. Only our immediate response will prevent an inferno.

We must learn to recognize the smoke of complacency. In NA, we have all the help We need to do that. We need to spend time with other recovering addicts because they may detect our complacency before we do. Newcomers will remind us of how painful active addiction can be. Our sponsor will help us remain focused, and recovery literature kept in easy reach can be used to extinguish the small flare-ups that happen from time to time. Regular participation in our recovery will surely enable us to see that wisp of smoke long before it becomes a major inferno.

Just for today: I will participate in the full range of my recovery; My commitment to NA is just as strong today as it was in the beginning of my recovery.

pg. 366

No way I could be complacent today, too many things got my attention. First off was hitting red lights going down main street, then we thought it was an accident, and when we got to the hold up, we saw the police had blocked John street and there was yellow ticker tape all around the court and there were a lot of police cars. Never did listen to the news to see what happened. Then I got to my group and got to chair the meeting. What do I do, forget the announcements and had to be reminded.

When I got home, I got attacked by a bout of fatigue, and I tried to come on line and combat it, but just had to go to bed. Tonight, when I went to take burgers out of the freezer, the lid fell on my arm, tore some skin and badly bruised it. I realized how much fear I had been carrying around since the put me on a blood thinner. Every time I moved my arm, it would start bleeding again. I had been thinking of my friend Theresa before I went to sleep today, but didn't call her. Seeing as I had to sit still and put pressure on my arm, I decided to call her only to find she had been thinking of me. She didn't call because she figured I would be sleeping, and I was.

I had two load of laundry to do. I got it done, but it was really pushing it. I finally had to ask my son for help to banadage my arm, I couldn't do it myself.

This is a one day at a time program. All things that happened to me would have been a reason to pick up. For me to use is to die, each day I have to find another option. I am so grateful for the tools of the program that help me to deal with life on life's terms.

https://tse3.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.M0267660a3c8f1f565c389b2968880e4do0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=224&h=156

[MajestyJo]

December 20, 2016

Overcoming self-obsession

Page 370

"In living the steps, we begin to let go of our self-obsession."

Basic Text, p.97

Many of us came to the program convinced that our feelings, our wants, and our needs were of the utmost importance to everyone. We had practiced a lifetime of self-seeking, self-centered behavior and believed it was the only way to live.

That self-centeredness doesn't cease just because we stop using drugs. Perhaps we attend our first NA function and are positive that everyone in the room is watching us, judging us, and condemning us. We may demand that our sponsor be on call to listen to us whenever we want-and they, in turn, may gently suggest that the world does not revolve around us. The more we insist on being the center of the universe, the less satisfied we will be with our friends, our sponsor, and everything else.

Freedom from self-obsession can be found through concentrating more on the needs of others and less on our own. When others have problems, we can offer help. When newcomers need rides to meetings, we can pick them up. When friends are lonely, we can spend time with them. When we find ourselves feeling unloved or ignored, we can offer the love and attention we need to someone else. In giving, we receive much more in return-and that's a promise we can trust.

Just for Today: I will share the world with others, knowing they are just as important as I am. I will nourish my spirit by giving of myself.


In order to recover, I need to share my experience, strength, and hope. If I don't share it with others, it will shrivel up and die. The Spirit will go out of the blessings I receive as a result of working the Steps, because I will be back in my ISMs, I Self, and Me.

[MajestyJo]

December 23, 2016

New Ideas

Page 373

"We reevaluate our old ideas so we can become acquainted with the new ideas that lead to a new way of life."

Basic Text, p.94

Learning to live a new way of life can be difficult. Sometimes, when the going gets especially hard, we're tempted to follow the path of least resistance and live by our old ideas again. We forget that our old ideas were killing us. To live a new way of life, we need to open our minds to new ideas.

Working the steps, attending meetings, sharing with others, trusting a sponsor - these suggestions may meet our resistance, even our rebellion. The NA program requires effort, but each step in the program brings us closer to becoming the kinds of people we truly want to be. We want to change, to grow, to become something more than we are today. To do that, we open our minds, try on the new ideas we've found in NA, and learn to live a new way of life.

Just for Today: I will open my mind to new ideas and learn to live my life in a new way.


Last night I was speaking to my spiritual advisor and was advised to change my thinking and thought patterns when I was praying. Indeed food for thought. A topic comes up until the lessn finally sinks in. A person at my home group keeps putting "open minded" on the topic list and every one was sick and tired of talking about it, me included. :(

[MajestyJo]

Here is the link for the daily reading:

www.jftna.org/jft/

These readings are also included in the Daily Readings at the top of the forum.

http://i717.photobucket.com/albums/ww173/prestonjjrtr/DTL%20Welcome/SnowmanSkatingGlitterWelcome.gif

[MajestyJo]

January 01, 2017

Vigilance

Page 1

"We keep what we have only with vigilance..."

Basic Text, p. 60

How do we remain vigilant about our recovery? First, by realizing that we have a disease we will always have. No matter how long we've been clean, no matter how much better our lives have become, no matter what the extent of our spiritual healing, we are still addicts. Our disease waits patiently, ready to spring the trap if we give it the opportunity.

Vigilance is a daily accomplishment. We strive to be constantly alert and ready to deal with signs of trouble. Not that we should live in irrational fear that something horrible will possess us if we drop our guard for an instant; we just take normal precautions. Daily prayer, regular meeting attendance, and choosing not to compromise spiritual principles for the easier way are acts of vigilance. We take inventory as necessary, share with others whenever we are asked, and carefully nurture our recovery. Above all, we stay aware!

We have a daily reprieve from our addiction as long as we remain vigilant. Each day, we carry the principles of recovery into all that we do, and each night, we thank our Higher Power for another day clean.

Just for Today: I will be vigilant, doing everything necessary to guard my recovery.

[MajestyJo]

NA Just For Today

January 4

The Love of the Fellowship

"Today secure in the love of the fellowship, we can finally look another human being in the eye and be grateful for who we are."
Basic Text p. 89

When we were using, few of us could tolerate looking someone in the eye-we were ashamed of who we were. Our minds were not occupied with anything decent or healthy, and we knew it. Our time, money, and energy weren't spent building loving relationships, sharing with others, or seeking to better our communities. We were trapped in a spiral of obsession and compulsion that went only in one direction: downward.

In recovery, our journey down that spiral path has been cut short. But what is it that has turned us around, drawing us back upward into the open spaces of the wide, free world? The love of the fellowship has done this.

In the company of other addicts, we knew we would not be rejected. By the example of other addicts, we were shown how to begin taking a positive part in the life around us. When we were unsure which way to turn, when we stumbled, when we had to correct a wrong we had done, we knew our fellow members were there to encourage us.

Slowly, we've gotten the feel of our freedom. No longer are we locked up in our disease; we are free to build and grow and share along with everyone else. And when we need support to take our next step, it is there. The security we've found in the love of the fellowship has made our new lives possible.

Just for today: I can look anyone in the eye without shame. I am grateful for the loving support that has made this possible.

The people in the rooms loved me back to good health. They loved me until I could love myself.

https://tse3.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.Ma721c50c575a02c3310a3e15e96d8f4fo0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=213&h=163

[MajestyJo]

January 20, 2017

One promise, many gifts

Page 20

"Narcotics Anonymous offers only one promise, and that is freedom from active addiction..."

Basic Text, p. 106

Imagine how it might be if we had arrived at the doors of Narcotics Anonymous, desperate, wanting to stop using drugs, only to be met by a sales pitch: "If you just work the steps and don't use drugs, you'll get married, live in the suburbs, have 2.6 children, and start wearing polyester. You will become a responsible, productive member of society and be fit company for kings and presidents. You will be rich and have a dynamic career." Most of us, greeted with such a heavy-handed spiel, would have shrieked and bolted for the door.

Instead of high-pressure nonsense and frightening predictions, we are greeted with a promise of hope: freedom from active addiction. We feel a blessed relief come over us when we hear that we never have to use drugs again. We aren't going to be forced to become anything!

Of course, after some time in recovery, good things start happening in our lives. We are given gifts-spiritual gifts, material gifts, gifts that we've always dreamed of but never dared hope we'd get. These, however, are truly gifts-they are not promised to us just because we become NA members. All we are promised is freedom from addiction-and it's more than enough!

Just for Today: I have been promised freedom from active addiction. The gifts I receive are the benefits of recovery.


The one gift alone is priceless. The Dolphin means manna. I look at it as food for the soul.

http://www.angelwinks.ca/images/bettyboop/bettyboop5.jpg

[MajestyJo]

NA Just For Today

Anxiety Attack?

"[The] Power that brought us to this program is still with us and will continue to guide us if we allow it."
Basic Text, p. 26

Ever had a panic attack? Everywhere we turn, life's demands overwhelm us. We're paralyzed, and we don't know what to do about it. How do we break an anxiety attack?

First, we stop. We can't deal with everything at once, so we stop for a moment to let things settle. Then we take a "spot inventory" of the things that are bothering us. We examine each item, asking ourselves this question: "How important is it, really?" In most cases, we'll find that most of our fears and concerns don't need our immediate attention. We can put those aside, and focus on the issues that really need to be resolved right away. Then we stop again and ask ourselves, "Who's in control here, anyway?" This helps remind us that our Higher Power is in control.

We seek our Higher Power's will for the situation, whatever it is. We can do this in any number of ways: through prayer, talks with our sponsor or NA friends, or by attending a meeting and asking others to share their experience. When our Higher Power's will becomes clear to us, we pray for the ability to carry it out. Finally, we take action.

Anxiety attacks need not paralyze us. We can utilize the resources of the NA program to deal with anything that comes our way.

Just for today: My Higher Power has not brought me all this way in recovery only to abandon me! When anxiety strikes, I will take specific steps to seek God's continuing care and guidance.

When I heard people talking about anxiety attacks, I thought they where a bunch of whooses. Then when I learned to listen and learn, I realized that the pot was calling the kettle black. I had gone into grocery stores and left my buggy in the middle of the aisle and got off the bus if it got too noisy and crowded. I heard how they felt, I too had the tightening in my chest and my brain stopped working. As I learned to apply the program, it seldom happened to me. When it does, I do the deep breathing and pray and ask for help. I had to do that last night when the AA meeting got too noisy before it started.

It didn't help that two guys I didn't know who said they thought they knew me came up to me. One was from NA, but he didn't have the right name of the meeting for the church he mentioned. I had heard the name and had been to the meeting. The other one asked if I had gone to school in Hamilton. I didn't come to Hamilton until I was 17. I had been to a lot of east end meetings. He said he had 33 years in recovery and chaired the meeting. His group was in Stoney Creek and it was a meeting that I always felt worse after the meeting than I did before. I think it was the low ceiling and tiles, as well as the energy from the people in the group. I didn't go there unless it was for their group anniversary and I could get a ride. People knew me from different groups, I went to many, but didn't know all the people there.

[MajestyJo]

NA Just For Today

God - Centeredness

"Gradually as we become more God-centered than self-centered, our despair turns to hope."
Basic Text p. 92

What a glorious thing to have hope! Before coming to Narcotics Anonymous, many of us lived lives of utter hopelessness. We believed we were destined to die from our disease.

Many members speak of being on a "pink cloud" their first months in the program. We've stopped using, made some friends, and life looks promising. Things are going great. Then reality sets in. Life is still life—we still lose jobs, our partners still leave us, friends still die, we still get sick. Abstinence is no guarantee that life will always go our way.

When the reality of life on its own terms sets in, we turn to our Higher Power and remember that life happens the way life happens. But no matter what occurs in our recovery we need not despair, for there is always hope. That hope lies in our relationship with our Higher Power.

This relationship, as expressed by the thought in our text, develops over time: "Gradually we become more God-centered." As we rely more and more on the strength of our Higher Power, life's struggles don't have to drag us into the sea of despair. As we focus more on God, we focus less on ourselves.

Just for today: I will rely on my Higher Power. I will accept that, regardless of what happens, my Higher Power will provide me with the resources to live with it.

I was "I" centered all of my life. As a sponsee once said, "I guess it wouldn't hurt to listen to my Higher Power in today. I listened to my Lower Power all of my life.

http://angelwinks.ca/images/animated/animated127.gif

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/17992024_431710307206221_6330479800806362012_n.jpg ?oh=0890eb9080fbfefb13aced500cb4bb73&oe=59791FEC

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s640x640/18119239_432443553799563_1840102413806148290_n.jpg ?oh=c926f8efbe10789e5c20f57eca8fde1d&oe=59847F79

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18119507_433159780394607_8838469292185088697_n.jpg ?oh=9655d2f19cf3dc8e9a1683102fa12efb&oe=598B8FC6

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18119488_434020606975191_4579812222789574854_n.jpg ?oh=c98181bd2787a3fc142670a3ff50f7ed&oe=598F0BE3

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18157543_434521253591793_731234144501661379_n.jpg? oh=08d9d588d83f9218a0ffa058b3a3f0fe&oe=59810E48

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18199033_434852126892039_6155156793587804811_n.jpg ?oh=0885bb0a6d3c1f55eff821222a26955f&oe=59BE5CEB

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18194870_435410116836240_5895654460949976237_n.jpg ?oh=bfbe2250b933130ef2f937f5c62f1e35&oe=5978988F

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/s720x720/18194959_435788916798360_3410569450880891981_n.jpg ?oh=7fbe2e6876aeab984a94e2a14a07d11c&oe=59828C68

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18402896_440892826287969_147791806085676253_n.jpg? oh=1ac40dd7bc7d8c42ae5c6fe845a708b4&oe=59769D9F

As they say, it is a journey, not a destination. I never get there. Each day is a new beginning.

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18519699_443926719317913_8454728773819390522_n.jpg ?oh=39124a636bc83b59e7778912e7df093e&oe=59BF2B8E

[MajestyJo]

https://scontent.fybz2-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/18622260_445669809143604_5033954126221469478_n.jpg ?oh=7e406f7d97f598e3b1e04bd05dd7ac76&oe=59A4C7E9

The Just for Today readings are included in the Daily Readings, but found these on FB, so thought I would share them with you.

[MajestyJo]

Step by step

"The shortest way to do many things is to do only one thing at a time."

-- Sydney Smiles

When I get overwhelmed by the number of tasks on my to-do list, I remind myself that the only way to get anywhere is step by step. And I cover the most distance in the journey of my life when I take a moment to decide which step will bring the greatest rewards.

"Often he who does too much does too little."

-- Italian Proverb

"If you chase two rabbits, both will escape."

-- Source Unknown

This reminds me that I need to be clean and sober. Sobriety doesn't happen with substitution.

[MajestyJo]

NA Just For Today

Surrendering Self-Will

"We want and demand that things always go our way. We should know from our past experience that our way of doing things did not work."

Basic Text, p.78

All of us have ideas, plans, goals for our lives. There's nothing in the NA program that says we shouldn't think for ourselves, take initiative, and put responsible plans into action. It's when our lives are driven by self-will that we run into problems.

When we are living willfully, we go beyond thinking for ourselves - we think only of ourselves. We forget that we are but a part of the world and that whatever personal strength we have is drawn from a Higher Power. We might even go so far as to imagine that other people exist solely to do our bidding. Quickly, we find ourselves at odds with everyone and everything around us.

At this point, we have two choices. We can continue in our slavery to self-will, making unreasonable demands and becoming frustrated because the planet doesn't spin our way. Or we can surrender, relax, seek knowledge of God's will and the power to carry that out, and find our way back to a condition of peace with the world. Thinking, taking initiative, making responsible plans-there's nothing wrong with these things, so long as they serve God's will, not merely our own.

Just for today: I will plan to do God's will, not mine. If I find myself at odds with everything around me, I will surrender self-will.

pg. 213

As I like to say, surrender isn't giving up, it is giving over to our Higher Power. My best thinking got me to the doors of recovery, why should I think it should do me in good stead without making changes in my life.

Every time a butterfly appears, it generally means transformation and change. I had two butterflies land on my dress today.

[MajestyJo]

NA Just for Today

July 24

The masks have to go

Page 214

"...we covered low self-esteem by hiding behind phony images that we hoped would fool people. The masks have to go."

Basic Text, p. 33

Over-sensitivity, insecurity, and lack of identity are often associated with active addiction. Many of us carry these with us into recovery; our fears of inadequacy, rejection, and lack of direction do not disappear overnight. Many of us have images, false personalities we have constructed either to protect ourselves or please others. Some of us use masks because we're not sure who we really are. Sometimes we think that these images, built to protect us while using, might also protect us in recovery.

We use false fronts to hide our true personality, to disguise our lack of self-esteem. These masks hide us from others and also from our own true selves. By living a lie, we are saying that we cannot live with the truth about ourselves. The more we hide our real selves, the more we damage our self-esteem.

One of the miracles of recovery is the recognition of ourselves, complete with assets and liabilities. Self esteem begins with this recognition. Despite our fear of becoming vulnerable, we need to be willing to let go of our disguises. We need to be free of our masks and free to trust ourselves.

Just for Today: I will let go of my masks and allow my self esteem to grow.


Just today I shared a memory with a friend. I told her of a person in my group who said, "Just because you change the color of your hair, do you think we won't recognize you." It changed from black, black and white, and as I smoked more, I had yellow in their like I had been a blond. I covered up the gray (and yellow from nicotine), with black, auburn, and then with a couple of errors with chlorine, plum and maroon, then brown, very short, short gray, blond, until the gray was mostly white. That's the story of my life! LOL! Even in recovery I went through an identity crisis until I allowed myself to be me.