Today's Thought - January

[bluidkiti]

January 1

Has it been a year of growth?

As any year draws to a close, we should reflect on how we have grown in sobriety. We should also identify changes during the year that enabled us to overcome bad habits and to move closer to better patterns of living.

Though we never are guaranteed favorable outcomes, we should always remember that sobriety is its own best reward. We want a full life, of course, but it must begin with a decision to seek and to maintain sobriety at all costs.

We find that with sobriety, lots of other problems seem to solve themselves. Even if they don't, we have the tools to move forward and to achieve goals that always eluded us while we were drinking. Every year in sobriety is a year of growth.

I'll be conscious today of recent improvements I've made in my life and all my affairs. With sobriety, these improvements will go on for a lifetime.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

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January 2

Embracing virtues and new attitudes

Because of our addiction, our actions (and inaction) have fostered cynicism, futility, and distrust. How could we ever have hoped to succeed with attitudes like that?

Now we are cultivating the virtues of understanding, love, and patience. It is often slow and difficult. We know that our Higher Power loves us and will lead us, if we only ask.

Am I developing new virtues?

Higher Power, take my hand and lead me from the old attitudes toward new virtues.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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January 3

Every new moment that arises in your life can now be a point of choice. . .in which you can choose to treat yourself and others with Compassion rather than Judgment.
--David Harp

Newcomer

I wince every time I hear the words "God as we understood Him" and "Higher Power." When meetings close with the Lord's Prayer, I feel like I'm being railroaded. I don't fit into the same religious slot that other people seem to take for granted.

Sponsor

All of us qualify to be here, but not because of any religious identification or belief. Most of us are tolerant of differences, but, being human, some of us forget that not everyone shares the same religious context. Whatever an individual member has to say about the role of his or her Higher Power, the only requirement for membership [in the Program] is the desire to stop using the addictive substance that got us here.

Once I heard a member say, "This meeting is my church." I'm glad that notion works for her. By the same token, I've always been grateful that this program is not a church otherwise I might have to rebel against it! We're not required to subscribe to a particular set of religious beliefs or rituals. In recovery, each of us is free to explore what we believe.

Today, I respect others' rights to their beliefs, just as I respect my own. I bring my love of openness, inclusiveness, and harmony with me wherever I go.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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January 4

I usually just lived one day at a time. I never had a sense of where I was going.
--Ruth Casey

Did any of us really know where we were going? We probably spent many hours, days, weeks even, making detailed plans for the people around us. These plans didn't usually suit others so they didn't often materialize. God, however, always had a plan in store for each of us, although sometimes we were the last to know it.

Is there any reason to think that anything has changed? Not really. We're still here, so that means God is still in charge of whatever should transpire today. Our part is to be willing to listen to God's direction and to follow it. We don't have to know where our steps are leading us. We can simply move forward, trusting that we will end up where we need to be.

We may have complicated our lives for too many years. That's not unusual. Busy people tend to do that. What we needed to do, where we needed to go, was always under the direction of God. It still is. Let's rejoice that our part is doable.

Living one day at a time works best. I'll give up thoughts of all else today.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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January 5

Rebellion against your handicaps gets you nowhere. Self-pity gets you nowhere. One must have the adventurous daring to accept oneself as a bundle of possibilities and undertake the most interesting game in the world - making the most of one's best.
--Harry Emerson Fosdick


What am I doing with what I've got? Instead of despairing over my lack of abilities in certain areas, am I doing the best with the talents I've been given?

All of us have unique gifts and abilities. Some of us work well with our hands; others are gifted at working with abstract ideas. Whatever our abilities, we would do well to concentrate on bringing those we can do to fruition rather than focus on our limitations.

Greek philosopher Epictetus put it this way: "He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has." German poet and dramatist Goethe said, "The man who is born with a talent which he is meant to use finds his greatest happiness in using it."

TODAY, let me not concentrate on my handicaps as much as on my abilities. I know I have been given all I need to make my life a success.

You are reading from the book:

The Reflecting Pond by Liane Cordes

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January 6

It is clear the future holds opportunities - it also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to seize the opportunities, avoid the pitfalls, and get back home by 6:00.
--Woody Allen

Sometimes we take ourselves far too seriously. We draw our lives in the absolutes of black and white, with no shadings of gray. We believe our whole lives depend on every decision we make. When a problem comes along, we see it as a crisis rather than another of the ongoing issues that confront all people. If we are displeased with someone, or if a person is upset with us, we amplify the feelings until we rupture the whole relationship.

It would be helpful to look at today's tasks and problems as a game. Yes, we would like to play the game well, but we could have a good time while doing it. If we don't take ourselves or our problems too seriously, maybe we'll have some fun.

Help me learn that daily living needs the light of humor.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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January 7

I'd like to get away from earth awhile. And then come back to it and begin again.
-- Robert Frost

Do we think it's weak to need a break? Do we ignore the need to recharge our batteries? Responsibility for our own lives requires us to recognize the need to restore our energy. Maybe our former escape from the world was by using food, or drugs, or spending money, or being preoccupied with another person.

Now, since we are developing the ability to be with ourselves, we can take a break from the world and come back restored. This meditation time generates more energy for our lives. Recreation with friends, a walk, a movie, or a concert does the same. Taking responsibility to get away is a good cure for self-pity and exhaustion.

Today, I will be aware of my need to restore my energy.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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January 8

It's not enough to talk to plants, you also have to listen.

~David Bergman

Plants grow best when we pay attention to them. That means watering, touching them, putting them in places where they will receive good light. They need people around them to notice if they are drooping at the edges or looking particularly happy in the sunlight. The more attention a plant receives, the better it will grow.

We need to be noticed in the same way. If we notice a family member or friend is drooping, perhaps we can pay some special attention to him or her. All of us need someone to care about how we are and to truly listen to us. We can share and double someone's happiness by noticing and talking about it also. We help the people around us to grow by listening to their droopy edges as well as their bright days. People need this as much as plants need light and water.

How can I help someone grow today?

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January 9

Trusting Our Higher Power
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood him.

~Step Three of Alcoholics Anonymous

So much talk about a Higher Power, God, as we understand God. So much joy as we come to understand Him. Spirituality and spiritual growth are the foundations of change. Recovery from codependency is not a do it yourself task.

Is God a relentless taskmaster? A hardhearted, shaming wizard with tricks up the sleeve? Is God deaf? Uncaring? Haphazard? Unforgiving?

No.

A loving God, a caring God. That is the God of our recovery No more pain than is necessary for usefulness, healing, and cleansing. As much goodness and joy as our heart can hold, as soon as our heart is healed, open, and ready to receive God: approving, accepting, instantly forgiving.

God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day/and sometimes big, delightful surprises perfectly timed, perfect for us.

A Master Artist, God will weave together all our joy, sadness and experience to create a portrait of our life with depth, beauty, sensitivity, color, humor, and feeling.

God as we understand Him: A loving God. The God of our recovery.

Today, I will open myself to the care of a loving God. Then, I will let God show me love.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go

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January 10

When we begin to take our failures nonseriously, it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them.

~Katherine Mansfield

Perfectionism and its control over our lives stands seriously in the way of our growth and well-being, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically. Life's lessons come through failures probably more than successes. Through our failures we learn humility. We learn to look to others for help and guidance. We learn how to let others fail, too. We fail because we are human.

When we no longer fear failure, we are free to attempt greater feats. We dare to learn more, and life is fuller for it—not just our own lives, but the lives that we touch.

Laughter over our mistakes eases the risk of trying again. Laughter keeps us young, and the lighthearted find more pleasure in each day.

I will fail at something I try today. I can laugh about it, though. My laughter will open the way to another try.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning

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January 11

A.A. Thought for the Day

Treating others to drinks gave us a kind of satisfaction. We liked to say, "Have a drink on me." But we were not really doing the other people a favor. We were only helping them to get drunk, especially if they happened to be alcoholic. In A.A., we really try to help other alcoholics. We build them up instead of tearing them down. Drinking created a sort of fellowship. But it really was a false fellowship, because it was based on selfishness. We used our drinking companions for our own pleasure. In A.A., we have real fellowship, based on unselfishness and a desire to help each other. And we make real friends, not fair weather friends. With sobriety, have I got everything that drinking's got, without the headaches?
Meditation for the Day

I know that God cannot teach anyone who is trusting in a crutch. I will throw away the crutch of alcohol and walk in God's power and spirit. God's power will so invigorate me that I shall indeed walk on to victory. There is never any limit to God's power. I will go step by step, one day at a time. God's will shall be revealed to me as I go forward.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have more and more dependence on God. I pray that I may throw away my alcoholic crutch and let God's power take its place.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day

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January 12

The human animal needs a freedom seldom mentioned: freedom from intrusion. He needs a little privacy quite as much as he wants understanding or vitamins or exercise or praise.

~Phyllis McGinley

The boundaries between us in our families and our friendships often need to be reshaped in recovery. We need to know our feelings are private. We reveal them at our choosing, with whom we choose. We give up on mind reading or probing because it intrudes upon another's privacy. We actively engage in our relationships by sharing ourselves and listening to each other.

A secret that makes a relationship dishonest is destructive and ought to be told. But we cannot force another person to be honest, or pry the truth from a loved one. We can only be honest ourselves and guard our own right to privacy. Intimacy is the bridge which is built between two separate people. Only when we let others have their privacy and we take ours can our relationships be more intimate.

I will maintain the boundaries of my privacy today and respect the right of others to do the same.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones

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January 13

The Power of Love

Love is the best motivation. When we are plugged in to our Higher Power, we are plugged in to love. It flows through us like a current, energizing our sluggish hearts and minds.

As we work the Steps of this program, we are given increased ability to love. By turning over our lives and our wills, we become receptive to the love which surrounds and sustains us. By taking inventory and being ready to have our character defects removed, we are able to get rid of old ways of thinking and acting which have been blocking out love.

We cannot produce love for others by ourselves, but we can receive it from our Higher Power. We can even receive love for people we don't particularly like.

Love gives energy for action and directs its course.

May I grow in Love.

Today's reading is from the book Food for Thought

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January 14

It is the weak who are cruel. Gentleness can only be expected from the strong.

~Leo Rosten

When we think of strength, do we think of someone who shows no emotion and intimidates others with physical power? True strength is the freedom to show all kinds of feelings. Strong people aren't afraid of being vulnerable. A person who feels insecure may not feel free to show any kind of softness or be able to share gentle feelings. If we have true inner strength, we are not afraid to show what is a part of us, gentle feelings included.

It is wonderful to see a well-conditioned athlete cry tears of joy after a victory. In such an example we can see physical and emotional strength. In our lives together, we will be stronger if we do not try to hide our feelings out of fear. As our feelings flow, we will increase our self-understanding and build our true strength.

Am I strong enough to show how I really feel today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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January 15

Letting Go of Guilt

Feeling good about ourselves is a choice. So is feeling guilty. When guilt is legitimate, it acts as a warning light, signaling that we're off course. Then its purpose is finished.

Wallowing in guilt allows others to control us. It makes us feel not good enough. It prevents us from setting boundaries and taking other healthy action to care for ourselves.

We may have learned to habitually feel guilty as an instinctive reaction to life. Now we know that we don't have to feel guilty. Even if we've done something that violates a value, extended guilt does not solve the problem; it prolongs the problem. So make an amend. Change a behavior. Then let guilt go.

Today, God, help me to become entirely ready to let go of guilt. Please take it from me, and replace it with self-love.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go

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January 16

Faith is a prerequisite of any undertaking

~Margo Jones

How many dreams have we let die? How many projects did we start, only to leave them unfinished? How many times have we promised ourselves, "This time will be different," but then didn't work to make it so? Negativity breeds more negativity. Fortunately, its opposite does likewise. Our attitude will carry us a long way. And a positive attitude will make all things possible.

We are meant for good living. But we must seek it out and be open to its invitation, be willing to put forth the necessary effort. Our dreams are our invitations to move forward, to strive for a further goal. And having faith in our ability to achieve our dreams will make easier the necessary steps.

We have been blessed with dreams, all of us. They are gifts meant to stretch our capabilities.

I can trust my dreams and aspirations. They are mine, alone, and special to me. Achievement is possible; faith and a positive attitude will ease my efforts.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning

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January 17

A.A. Thought for the Day

Since I realized that I had become an alcoholic and could never have any more fun with liquor and since I knew that from then on liquor would always get me into trouble, common sense told me that the only thing left for me was a life of sobriety. But I learned another thing in A.A., the most important thing anyone can ever learn: that I could call on a Higher Power to help me keep away from liquor; that I could work with that Divine Principle in the universe; and that God would help me to live a sober, useful, happy life. So now I no longer care about the fact that I can never have any more fun with drinking. Have I learned that I am much happier without it?
Meditation for the Day

Like a tree, I must be pruned of a lot of dead branches before I will be ready to bear good fruit. Think of changed people as trees that have been stripped of their old branches, pruned, cut, and bare. But through the dark, seemingly dead branches flows silently, secretly, the new sap, until with the sun of spring comes new life. There are new leaves, buds, blossoms, and fruit, many times better because of the pruning. I am in the hands of a Master Gardener, who makes no mistakes in His pruning.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may cut away the dead branches of my life. I pray that I may not mind the pruning, since it helps me to bear good fruit later.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day

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January 18

Too much agreement kills a chat.

~Eldridge Cleaver

Many of us haven't learned there is room for disagreement in a relationship. Some men who grew up in addicted families saw a lot of pain, anger, and quarreling. Many learned to be always pleasing and agreeable, no matter how they felt. Others took it as a personal insult when someone disagreed with them.

We choke the vitality and excitement in our love relationships if we are too intent on avoiding conflict. Nothing can be resolved if we smooth everything over. Differences between people don't just go away. If we don't bring them out, they fester and create silent tension or boredom. If we willingly express our thoughts and feelings, we can learn how to resolve our disagreements and to appreciate each other for our differences as well as our similarities. If two people in a relationship were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.

Today, I will try to be more open about my differences with people, not as a way of fighting, but as a way of letting them know me better.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones

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January 19

Acceptance

When we have given our lives back to our Higher Power, we gradually learn to accept what happens to us as part of His plan. Most of us made a mess of trying to run our own lives. We are amazed at how much better things go when we acknowledge that the Power greater than ourselves is in control.

Every experience, the bad one as well as the good one, becomes an opportunity to learn and to serve. We may not like what it is that we are given to do or to feel on a particular day, but we learn to accept it as necessary for our growth. We can look back and see that we have learned even more from our failures than from our successes.

When we accept our lives and ourselves as part of God's creation, we are open to the work of His spirit and His love. Then positive change and growth become possible.

Teach me to accept Your will.

Today's reading is from the book Food for Thought

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January 20

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked, and jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.

~James Barrie

If kisses can be made of acorn buttons, they can be made of any good thing. Think of kisses made of candy. Therefore, there must be a thousand and one ways to give a kiss. We can give one made of wild flowers picked in the ditch, the melody in a music box, the few true words in a note, or the picture we ourselves draw to give to the one we love. Think of how we can hide them here and there under pillows, in corners, in pockets where they're sure to be seen and felt. Think of how hearts kiss when we hug or hold hands, how sleeping beauties suddenly wake up.

Does it matter that we try new ways to show our same old love?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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January 21

Control

Sometimes, the gray days scare us. Those are the days when the old feelings come rushing back. We may feel needy, scared, ashamed, and unable to care for ourselves.

When this happens, it's hard to trust ourselves, others, the goodness of life, and the good intentions of our Higher Power. Problems seem overwhelming. The past seems senseless; the future, bleak. We feel certain the things we want in life will never happen.

In those moments, we may become convinced that things and people outside of ourselves hold the key to our happiness. That's when we may try to control people and situations to mask our pain. When these "codependent crazies" strike, others often begin to react negatively to our controlling.

When we're in a frenzied state, searching for happiness outside ourselves and looking to others to provide our peace and stability, remember this: Even if we could control things and people, even if we got what we wanted, we would still be ourselves. Our emotional state would still be in turmoil.

People and things don't stop our pain or heal us. In recovery, we learn that this is our job, and we can do it by using our resources: our Higher Power, our support systems, our recovery program, and ourselves.

Often, after we've become peaceful, trusting, and accepting, what we want comes to us—with ease and naturalness.

The sun begins to shine again. Isn't it funny, and isn't it true, how all change really does begin with us?

I can let go of things and people and my need to control today. I can deal with my feelings. I can get peaceful. I can get calm. I can get back on track and find the true key to happiness—myself. I will remember that a gray day is just that - one gray day.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go

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January 22

Fortuitous circumstances constitute the moulds that shape the majority of human lives.

~Augusta Evans

Being in the right place at the right time is how we generally explain our good fortune or the good fortune of a friend. But it's to our advantage to understand how we managed to be in the right place at just the right moment.

We have probably heard many times at meetings that God's timetable is not necessarily the same as our timetable. That events will happen as scheduled to fit a picture bigger than the picture encompassed by our egos. And frequently our patience wears thin because we aren't privy to God's timetable. But we can trust, today and always, that doors open on time. Opportunities are offered when we are ready for them. Nary a moment passes that doesn't invite us to both give and receive a special message--a particular lesson. We are always in God's care, and every circumstance of our lives is helping to mold the women we are meant to be.

I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning

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January 23

A.A. Thought for the Day

One drink started a train of thought that became an obsession, and from then on, we couldn't stop drinking. We developed a mental compulsion to keep drinking until we got good and drunk. People generally make two mistakes about alcoholism. One mistake is that it can be cured by physical treatment only. The other mistake is that it can be cured by willpower only. Most alcoholics have tried both of these ways and have found that they don't work. But we members of A.A. have found a way to arrest alcoholism. Have I got over my obsession by following the A.A. program?
Meditation for the Day

I will try to be unruffled, no matter what happens. I will keep my emotions in check, although others about me are letting theirs go. I will keep calm in the face of disturbance, keep that deep, inner calm through all the experiences of the day. In the rush of work and worry, the deep, inner silence is necessary to keep me on an even keel. I must learn to take the calm with me into the most hurried days.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be still and commune with God. I pray that I may learn patience, humility, and peace.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day

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January 24

Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind.

~Alex Karras

In our culture, being a man often means being tough, having sexual prowess, and not showing feelings. We realize in this life of recovery that those are silly and immature myths, even though we see them repeatedly on TV, on billboards, and in newspapers.

When we are told these things repeatedly, it makes an impact on us. So we need to hear from each other that this is not the way we wish to live. We don't admire these attitudes, and we don't believe the stories. Truly courageous men know themselves. They have been around enough to have depth to their souls, to let themselves love, and to feel the pain of life.

Today, I am grateful to know and share my feelings and to have genuine relationships with those I love.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones

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January 25

Setting Priorities

One of our slogans is "first things first." We cannot have or do everything; we must set our priorities and choose what means the most to us.

Each of us needs to spend quiet time searching the inner self to determine which people, which activities, which tasks are most important. The results may surprise us. We may find that we are spending too much time with someone we really do not enjoy, preparing complicated meals which no one needs, working at a job which we dislike in order to make more money to buy more things. Do we really need the things? Do they enrich our lives or are they merely impressive?

Because I am a compulsive overeater, abstinence is the most important thing in my life. Without it, I do not enjoy other people, I do not like myself, I do not work well. If abstinence does not come first, everything else suffers.

May I remember that abstinence is my number one priority.

Today's reading is from the book Food for Thought

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January 26

I have often thought morality may perhaps consist solely in the courage of making a choice.

~Leon Blum

Sometimes, trying to do the right thing isn't easy because it isn't what we want to do. For instance, we may want to sneak a cookie to take to bed with us, or we may want to stay out late. But is that the right thing to do?

One way to tell is to think how we'll feel after we've done it. Will we be happy, or will we feel guilty because we know in our hearts it is wrong? On the other hand, how would we feel if we resisted the temptation? Perhaps we'd feel great because we'd know in our hearts we'd done the right thing. And don't we deserve to feel good about ourselves? Of course we do!

How wonderful it is that our feelings can help us do the right thing when we're in doubt.

Will I have the courage to follow my true feelings today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift, Daily Meditations for Families

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January 27

Setting Our Own Course

We are powerless over other people's expectations of us. We cannot control what others want, what they expect, or what they want us to do and be.

We can control how we respond to other people's expectations.

During the course of any day, people may make demands on our time, talents, energy, money, and emotions. We do not have to say yes to every request. We do not have to feel guilty if we say no. And we do not have to allow the barrage of demands to control the course of our life.

We do not have to spend our life reacting to others and to the course they would prefer we took with our life.

We can set boundaries, firm limits on how far we shall go with others. We can trust and listen to ourselves. We can set goals and direction for our life. We can place value on ourselves.

We can own our power with people.

Buy some time. Think about what you want. Consider how responding to another's needs will affect the course of your life. We live or own life by not letting other people, their expectations, and their demands control the course of our life. We can let them have their demands and expectations; we can allow them to have their feelings. We can own our power to choose the path that is right for us.

Today, God, help me own my power by detaching, and peacefully choosing the course of action that is right for me. Help me know I can detach from the expectations and wants of others. Help me stop pleasing other people and start pleasing myself.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go

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January 28

We can never go back again, that much is certain.

~Daphne DuMaurier

Yesterday is gone, but its experiences will be reflected in those of today. We learned from both the good and the bad situations of yesterday. Where we travel today, likewise, will influence our direction tomorrow. We can't do over what has gone before, but we can positively incorporate all that life is offering us from this moment forth.

We are moving toward greater understanding of life's mysteries with each experience. As today unfolds, we can be moved by the adventures. What we experience is ours alone and will contribute to the unfolding of our special destiny. We move forward, only forward. The doors behind us are closed forever.

Facing what comes to us, with strength, is a gift from this program we share. Letting go of the yesterdays and the last years is another gift offered by this program. And trust that what we face along with what we let go will weave the pattern of our rightful unfolding—that is the ultimate gift given to us by this program.

I will take a long look at where I am today and be grateful for my place. It's right for me, now, and is preparing me for the adventure ahead.

Today's reading is from the book Each Day a New Beginning

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January 29

A.A. Thought for the Day

Now we can take an inventory of the good things that have come to us through A.A. To begin with, we're sober today. That's the biggest asset on any alcoholic's books. Sobriety to us is like goodwill in business. Everything else depends on that. Most of us have jobs which we owe to our sobriety. We know we couldn't hold these jobs if we were drinking, so our jobs depend on our sobriety. Most of us have wives or husbands and children, which we either had lost or might have lost, if we hadn't stopped drinking. We have friends in A.A., real friends who are always ready to help us. Do I realize that my job, my family, and my real friends are dependent upon my sobriety?
Meditation for the Day

I must trust God to the best of my ability. This lesson has to be learned. My doubts and fears continually drive me back into the wilderness. Doubts lead me astray, because I am not trusting God. I must trust God's love. It will never fail me, but I must learn not to fail it by my doubts and fears. We all have much to learn in turning out fear by faith. All our doubts arrest God's work through us. I must not doubt. I must believe in God and continually work at strengthening my faith.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may live the way God wants me to live. I pray that I may get into that stream of goodness in the world.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day

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January 30

A man who studieth revenge keeps his own wounds green.

~Francis Bacon

Where do we direct our energy? Are we spending time and thought on how we have been wronged? On the unfairness of life? Those who consume their resources in this way have few left for growth and development. Their wounds stay open for years, and they block the healing.

What will we need to set aside our resentments and hateful attitudes? Perhaps we have been passively waiting for the other guy to make amends. That only puts our enemies in charge of us. It would be better if we could say, "I am going to move on. The change that is needed for me to heal will come from within me. I will not put my happiness in another's hands." More than revenge, we want a life worth living—for ourselves and the ones we love. We can give our energies to that.

Lift from me the desire for revenge. Replace it with the fullness of a healed life.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones

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January 31

Values

What do I value most? What is number one in my life? What is at the center?

When I was overeating, I was the center. I was the biggest thing in my universe, and all else revolved around me. A frightening state of affairs, since egotism does not bring peace of mind or security. Self was most important to me, and that egotism was my downfall. When I fell off my high horse and hit bottom, I had nowhere to go except to something outside of myself.

As we compulsive overeaters take Step Two and come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity, then we begin to shift the center of our consciousness from ourselves to God. This is our only hope. As long as our weak selves are at the center, we cannot make real progress, either in controlling our addiction or in living useful lives.

When we hit bottom, we are humbled. When we are humbled, we are able to perceive and acknowledge that God is primary and that abstinence is our most important task. Values are sorted out and order brings inner peace and security.

You, Lord, are the center of my life.

Today's reading is from the book Food for Thought