What a blessed assurance.

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today! William Allen White

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Some times we don't like our feelings and tend to stuff them with food or have another cigarette. Just because we have a feeling doesn't mean we have to act on it either. Often it is just acknowledging the feeling will help you to let go.

Thank You
 

Have been slack in sharing my gratitude. I have allowed everything to come first and have no energy left to think let alone post something. This is what 7 hours of sleep has done to me

We are not in a race. There is nothing that says once we start we have to finish this day, week, month, or even a year. I heard that some people wait that long to share Step 5 but I don't advice anyone to carry around all that 'stuff' for that long. A burden shared is a burden lightened.

I was also told that once to finish Step 3, you should immediately do a Step Four.

No one did a number on us more than we harmed ourselves. We didn't get this way over night so we can't expect to heal overnight.

Give yourself a break. As a long timer said, "I never heard that hockey took us anywhere. Not sure of his exact wording, he replaced our God with our hockey,Darth Vader, and/or football."

A good book, a walk in nature, and bubble bath, all while listening to music and then we might get in the mood to do a little step work or go to a meeting.

This is something a struggle with. I think a lot of it is in my nature, all or nothing at all. I am an Aires. And as I like to say, "The left foot moves forward and the right foot doesn't know it is suppose to follow." Act/react something I had trouble with and God and I are working on it one day at a time.

Right now, my balance is off and it is causing my falls. I can't catch myself, I am powerless, so I need to build up my muscle tone. There is always a solution if you know where to find it. If you don't know, you have to do what I did, reach out for help,

Never heard it called after burn before. That is what shame, guilt, fear can do it's number on us until we can let them go, recognize them for what they are, at that takes the power out of them. Let go and Let God is a good slogan to get rid of that burn and not leave a nasty after taste.

For many years I didn't think I was worthy of recovery. As I have shared before, my counselor when I was 6 years sober (I went for outside help), asked my why I hadn't asked for forgiveness of myself. I told her, "I never thought to ask," I was one of the sick ones. I stayed sick because of my denial.

I went to AA for my denial, I went to NA for identification, and I went to Al-Anon to find myself.

My dad said I was more contrary than stubborn. I would argue for argument sake. i think there was a little bit of stubbornness if I look for it. What I did find out was that I didn't always have to ask for each specific time I was stubborn, I just have to ask that my stubbornness be removed. By acknowledging it, it takes away it's power.

Again it is about acceptance, I don't have to like it to accept it; but I do have to accept it if I want to grow and change. Without the acceptance, I stay stuck.

My co-sponsor told me, 'Stop it. If you are still intellectualizing stop it, quit trying to figure things out. Just do, don't try to figure out why or how, just do it. The program has worked for others for many years. have faith and trust the program will work for you.

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This is me. My old friend from New Zealand told me many years ago, Ms Perfection is part of your disease. Having things perfect is not the spiritual aim in recovery. We aim toward it trying to pput aside old behaviors and ways of thinking.

Progress, not perfection.

They say that the longest journey we will make in recovery is from our head to our heart. For me, back to basics is going back to when I found a program for me and look at what I did then and what am I doing now. Have I left something behind that got me to where i am in today. Do I need to reinstate it.

Have I lost my heart. Am I back in my head trying to intellectualize and figure things out.

A smile is always brighter when it comes back at you. When I deposit in my smile bank, I receive dividends. That is what makes it spiritual.

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Things that were important, become redundant. Things we could not live without, just lost their value. The was we looked at things had changed and things were no more.

This reminds me of geographical cures. Where ever I go, I take me with me. Let it begin with me.

Osho says that doing dishes is a form of meditation. He also says that housework is too. I am yet to agree with him, I let my son do them.

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I was told that God answers prayer 3 ways. "Yes, No, and You got to be kidding."

When we trust our God, we learn to trust ourselves. How many times I heard a gentle whisper and discounted it only to find it came from my God. The Good Orderly Direction is there if I am open to receive and through it, I learn to trust myself.

The Twelve Rewards of the Twelve Step Program

Ann C. wrote this "a number of years before"
the 1985 Internation Convention in Montreal, Canada
where she set it to tape at the Oldtimers Meeting.

She wrote it to show the contrast that can take place
in any of our lives if we will try to follow the AA principles.

We can all have Hope, instead of desperation;

Faith, instead of despair;

Courage, instead of fear;

Peace of Mind, instead of confusion;

Self-respect, instead of self-contempt;

Self-confidence, instead of helplessness;

The respect of others, instead of their pity and contempt;

A clean conscience, instead of a sense of guilt;

Real friendships, instead of loneliness;

A clean pattern of life, instead of a purposeless existence;

the love and understanding of our families, instead of their doubts and fears;

and the freedom of a happy life, instead of the bondage of an alcoholic obsession.

All this and more through AA, are we grateful enough?
Gratitude will continue the miracle of your sobriety, I found that out.

as written by Ann C. of Niles, Ohio - sober April 1, 1948
Found this on another site, not sure if it is posted here or not.

It is always good to remember to be grateful for the freedom of sobriety, especially at this time of the season.

How ironic, this was written the year I was born.

Don't pick up, go to meetings, get a home group, get a sponsor {get a temporary sponsor if you can't find someone you can trust or identify with or doesn't have anything in common with you), work the Steps and the Traditions (you need to live long enough to work the Steps, they are the program).

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Just had a thought. Love is not having to say you are sorry. An old advertising saying that I can apply my program to. I need to change my thoughts and actions, so I no longer have to apologize for them, because I no longer do them.

A good picture of what Step 9 is all about. We know right from wrong for our recovery, it is about putting it into practice that can be difficult. Practice these principles in all our affairs. I no longer have to say, "Sorry I wasn't honest with you, Sorry I took that, I should have asked first, Sorry I couldn't be here, I had to go someone where else that day (don't tell them it was to the picture show).

So grateful that this program is one day at a time and I get to practice my program daily. Some days, I need to practice all 12 Steps to the best of my ability. I might have worked them, but there is no reason why I can't try to apply them to my life when I become aware of them.

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For the most part, the reading says it all. It sure mirrored what I thought in early recovery.

My sponsor use to say, a burden shared is a burden lessoned. If you share it with one person, you only have to take half of it home. If you share it with ten people, you only have to take 1/10th of it home.

Many times I have shared a portion of my story only to have someone say, I am so glad you shared that I thought I was the only one. I needed that identification. For so long I compared and felt like I didn't fit in.

I was very lost, fragmented and bankrupt on all levels when I came into recovery. I found myself reflected in the women in my home group and in the men and women in other groups.

As I heard a man share one time, I had trouble getting in touch with my feelings until I heard a woman share. It is much easier for us. For men, it isn't considered the macho thing. By sharing, they too learn to identify. We all have a masculine and feminine side. I once got a medication card that told me that me feminine side was languishing. I was acting out in my survivor mode. Recovery for me is about balance.

This may be written for an alcoholic and/or an addict, but as an ACoA qualifier, there was a lot of garbage that I had to let go of. Let go of the darkness, so there was room for the light. Those old tapes were killers and had to be overhauled and replaced.

We often collect garbage and not aware of doing so. We attract things when we are down that don't serve us in today. We take on things that are good for us in the moment, but soon becomes redundant.

We take on things that are not ours to take on. Sometimes it is projected onto us and it isn't ours to take on, but often it is the caretaker in us, taking on too much.

Remember garbage collectors come once a week and we need to remember to put out the garbage.

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The difference in today, is that I lost that desire to not put anything but healthy foods into my body. Have found myself back in the willfullness, knowing better, but not caring that I am diabetic. Tonight I passed on some advice that I need to take for myself. I have to pray for the willingness to be willing to think healthy and what is good for me.

Tonight I bough two butter tarts before my group and I gave them away. After the group, I bought two butter tarts to replace them. :(

I just have to read the title and I feel better.

Feel connected with your Higher Power.

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If carrots would do what alcohol did for me, I'd be a carrotolic.

- Al A.

From Alkiespeaks

Love this, It is one of my saying revised a little, "I am a bridgeaholic." Love playing bridge. Maybe I should say I am a gameaholic, but then I only play about 3 on the computer, and although bridge is a priority, I do like cribbage, scrabble, and Yahtzee.

I was sharing with my friend last night and said, "If I could drink safely, I would drink." Everyone once in a while, the old tape, "If you can't beat them join them" comes to mind and I tell myself I really didn't have a problem. I would tell myself that I could have one drink, many times only one or two. What I put to the back of my mind was the fact that I had some heavy duty drugs in my body and didn't really need the booze.

I was told that anything that I put between my and my God, became my new God, because I lost connection to mine.

Love the quote, I have been a busy/workkaholic and a bridgeaholic, and a computerholic, why not a carrotolic. They have been a long time favourite vegetable of mine.

Anything that I become obsessive/compulsive about, all leads to the same soul sickness.

Just had 1/2 sandwich, couldn't get more down ???? My God does answer prayer.